Do This, When the Classroom Honeymoon is Over

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You are now tuned into Virtually I'mpossible Presents Lazy Learning Land Podcast,
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where we teach teachers how to be lazier, yet more effective,
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to increase student performance, but decrease teacher burnout and stress.
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I'm S.Dot, your hostess that always gives you the mostest while doing the least.
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Also known as the queen of working
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and not working with over 15 years
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of experience working at the hood schools and I
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absolutely love it I am here to share with you the tricks of the trade I have
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developed that will make your life as a teacher so much easier and even help
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you to fall back in love with the profession today's episode is sponsored by
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lazy learning land podcast on TikTok,
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where we skip all the fluff and give you the real deal applicable stuff.
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You can watch teacher tip shorts, comedic shorts, and even watch me interact
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with my real students during class periods, all while implementing tips that I share with you.
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Go follow Lazy Learning Land on TikTok.
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Now for today's episode.
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All right, all right. Welcome everyone to another episode of Lazy Learning Land podcast.
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Super excited for the show that we have in store for you today because we are
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definitely going to tackle what in the heck do you do when the honeymoon phase is over?
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What do you do when the honeymoon phase is over?
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This is definitely something that as teachers we all experience and if you are
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new to the profession you are sure to experience it sooner than later.
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Let's get right into it. So it definitely always strikes my funny bone y'all
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when I have friends and family that like call me and ask me how was my first week of school.
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They'll call and be like how was your first day? How was your first week?
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And I'm like, I laugh and I'm genuinely like, it's a piece of cake.
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I mean, after all, the first week or the first weeks of school are usually a piece of cake.
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This is because, you know, the students want each of their teachers to like them.
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They want to be viewed as an angel that does their work and that's well-mannered
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and has a side of self-control. role.
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Unfortunately, this desire in those students does not last long for many of them.
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Eventually, their mask begins to slip and fall and the real them is suddenly revealed.
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You know, the version of them that knows how to look busy but doesn't actually complete any work.
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The side of them that rolls their eyes, sucks their teeth, talks back,
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and has an attitude when they don't get their way.
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Oh yes and let's not forget
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the part of them that will talk to anybody and
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I do mean anybody that you sit them next to you see I could go on and on and
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on and on for days about the major switch-ups that our students tend to do to
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us once these first weeks of school and that honeymoon moon phase is over.
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But what difference would that make?
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Like what difference would it make for me to keep telling us the problems?
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We need to get some solutions, correct?
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So as teachers, we need to develop a plan to combat this issue head on before it is too late.
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And by too late, I do mean before we lose complete and utter control over our classrooms.
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You see, it is absolutely natural for the honeymoon phase to end.
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It happens in all relationships.
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But what is not OK is for us to not quickly, abruptly, and at the first signs
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of trouble, snatch our students back into following our expectations.
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Now, you might be wondering, well, how might one go about this?
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Well, my fellow educators, I'm about to go all in and line it out for you right here, right now.
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So what do you do the first weeks of school after the honeymoon phase is over?
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And number one, we're going to roll right into number one, is to nip it in the bud.
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Let's face it, kids will be kids and they will only get away with what we allow them to get away with.
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This means they have to test you several times to see what you will and will
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not let slide consistently.
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They are not phased not one little bit about you putting your foot down on the
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same topic once or twice.
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I actually took some time to do some research on this, guys.
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And research shows that students on an average, they test boundaries three to
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five times before they willingly fall in line. Now, this is per kid.
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So if you have on average, let's say 25 kids in your classroom and each kid
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test the boundaries five times, 25 times five.
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That's like 150 times of you having to redirect your students.
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Crazy, right? Right. But that's exactly what it's going to take.
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And if you even let the smallest infractions go, it sets the tone for undermining you.
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It allows your authority inside your classrooms to be absolutely disrespected.
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But this is, you know, it is pivotal time for us to address every behavior that veers off course.
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That is why number one is nip it in the bud. When the first weeks of school
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honeymoon is over, let nothing slide, zip, zero, not even the smallest lack of compliance.
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You have to be willing to show your students that you will sacrifice their learning,
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sacrifice their grade and sacrifice their access to privileges when they are
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resistant to your classroom expectation.
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Next up on the list is be consistent. Being consistent means to be unwavering
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about when you enforce your rules.
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You should only be making exceptions to your rules about 1% of the time and
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typically for extreme and rare cases only.
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That being said, the other part of being consistent is enforcing the rules no
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matter who the student is.
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That's right. Right. Teachers are human and we naturally have kids that fall
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into our favorite category, ones that we gravitate more towards than others.
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But the key is for you as the teacher to know who your favorites are and for
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your students to have absolutely no clue who your favorites are.
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Usually where teachers mess up and I mean really mess up is they enforce the rules unequally.
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The kid that tends to misbehave more, barely does their work.
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The teacher has a tendency to throw the book of rules at them if they even breathe wrong.
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However, if it comes to one of our favorite students, we tend to give them several free passes.
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The bad kid sees it. Hey, all the other kids in the class see it too.
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And doing this absolutely kills your credibility and lessens your ability to
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have control of your classroom.
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Students are more likely to
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follow the rules when they feel like the rules apply to everyone equally.
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Once the first weeks of school honeymoon is over, if rules only apply to some,
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you start to lose respect of the majority of your students.
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You will then begin to see that you are receiving lots of pushback and lots
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of very intentional calculated misbehavior.
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Number three, avoid power struggles.
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In a previous podcast, I talk about addressing how to handle student-teacher conflicts.
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So if you haven't listened to Hold Expectations, Not Grudges, please go do that.
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But after you listen to this one and it just talks about holding students accountable.
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But if you haven't latched onto that one yet, I do highly recommend it.
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And I also recommend if you're more interested in knowing how to handle student
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defiance without getting into an actual power struggle, then check out that
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post, Collaborate or Else When Students Refuse.
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And I know it has a, it says collaborate in it, but it definitely talks about
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how do you get kids to comply and skip over the power struggle phase.
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Okay, let's keep going. While all teachers crave compliance,
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creating a confrontation in front of the entire class is an absolute no-no.
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The student will automatically feel as if they have to buck up at you because
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all of their peers are watching and all of their peers are listening.
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You may want to try to have a more personal conversation with that student.
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Usually, I would say in the hallway whenever possible.
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And no matter how much we step into the role of parents, teachers,
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teachers, I need you to hear me on this.
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No matter how much we step into the suedo role.
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Role of parents, we are not the parents of our students.
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That being said, we should not be out here giving these kids ultimatums.
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Instead, you always want to offer the little darling some options,
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you know, by providing choices.
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You see, this gives the student a false sense of control.
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And I do mean false because the options that you provide for them,
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you want to make sure that the options that you don't want them to pick,
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you know, those options should come with less favorable outcomes on the student's behalf.
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You know, it's a little bit of a Jedi mind trick. You see, because in the event
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that the student actually picks one of those less favorable options,
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they bypass the right to be upset with you simply because they selected their own poison.
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They pick this for themselves. So always be sure on top of that,
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that you state to them, because some kids will be like, I don't like none of
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them options. So I ain't gonna pick one.
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You gotta be you know think 10 steps ahead so you always want to be sure that
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you state and by the way if you choose not to make a choice that means I have
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to decide for you and again that is key because it disarms the student from
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being able to be angry with you,
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if you make the choice for them because they refuse to make a choice then that
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was their choice, and ultimately still on them.
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All in all, when the first weeks of school honeymoon is over,
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you are simply trying to foster respect without losing control of your classroom.
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Number four, y'all, keep it in-house. Now, what exactly do I mean by keeping it in-house?
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I am referring to managing as many of your behavior issues yourself inside of your own classroom.
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You must be prepared to dish out disciplinary consequences to your own students,
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because the more you outsource your consequences, the less your students will mind and respect you.
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They will, however, mind to respect the other people that are giving them the consequences.
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So you want to, as much as possible, be that person that they end up respecting in the end.
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If the only way you can get your students in line is to call their parents every
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other day or write them on a referral so an administrator can handle it or to
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send them out to other classrooms for another teacher to deal with them and
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to give them a good talking to,
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you are, in fact, not just losing the battle, but you are losing the entire war.
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You are losing the war at that point.
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Sidebar, I'm not referring to extreme situations like when you get cussed out,
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a kid just walks out of class, kid, you know, smells like marijuana,
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you know, things like that.
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Kid has a weapon. I'm not talking about those major cases.
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I'm talking about just true open defiance, refusal, those types of things.
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Handle those things in-house as much as possible.
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You see, as the first weeks of school honeymoon comes to an end,
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your students will only begin to honor and respect you once you show them your
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willingness and your ability to manage discipline consistently.
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Do y'all see a pattern how the word consistently kind of keeps coming up in
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these different tips? OK.
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When you address issues directly and in a fair manner,
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you are establishing clear cut boundaries, allowing an environment to develop
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where your students know that you will make good on your promises,
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that you will follow through on your expectations instantly.
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All right, y'all. The last tip, tip number five, which I think is my absolute
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favorite, which is reward the right. Right.
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Very rarely will a teacher encounter a class where 100 percent of the students
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are just straight up knuckleheads.
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That being said, a great method of getting your students back on track is to
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reward the few, the proud and the compliant.
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Positive reinforcement will not only motivate those students into doing right.
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It will not only motivate those students that are doing right to continue to
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keep up the good work. it will send a very powerful message to the ones who are not doing right.
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You know, Patty Patty and me says that a bit of healthy jealousy can spark a
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desire in those students for them to get on board.
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You see, once the first weeks of school honeymoon ends, highlighting the behaviors
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you want to continue is key.
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Using positive reinforcement encourages others to follow suit.
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When students see their peers being praised, see them being rewarded,
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or seeing them enjoying special privileges, it lights a fire in them.
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Opening the door for fostering a classroom culture where doing the right thing becomes the norm.
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All right, so in conclusion, about to sum this baby on, okay?
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While the honeymoon phase is enjoyable for everyone, both students,
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teachers alike, it is important for teachers to remember that this does not last forever.
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You have to know this, and the key is to be ready when students' behavior starts to shift.
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As soon as you see the first signs of their mask slipping, you need to act quickly and decisively.
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If you can catch it when the mask has only slipped and has not yet completely
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fallen off, then and only then do you stand a chance of still having an amazing school year.
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Addressing even minor infractions and reinforcing your expectations will prevent
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larger issues from taking root in your classroom,
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while giving you a stronger chance
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of maintaining your ideal classroom environment throughout the year.
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However, but if you allow behaviors to go by unchecked, the consequences can
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be astronomical for you as the teacher.
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You see, the longer students are allowed to test your limits unchecked,
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the harder it becomes to reel them back in.
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That's when unwanted and unchecked behaviors can escalate.
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See, they always start small and then they just build and build and build and
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build and build because these kids get really intrigued because they want to
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see just how far they can push the envelope.
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And that creates the risk of losing complete and utter control of your classroom.
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At this point, all masks are off and restoring order will be an uphill battle.
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And I'm talking about one that can take weeks or even months to overcome if
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you got the balls to be able to overcome it.
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The good news is that you can avoid this scenario by nipping issues in the bud early on.
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Be consistent and avoid power struggles. Handle your own discipline within your
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classroom whenever possible and absolutely make sure to reward those students
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who are doing the right thing.
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Doing these things enables you to create a classroom culture where respect,
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compliance, and positive behavior can thrive, ensuring that you and your students
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can still have an amazing school year, even after the honeymoon phase has ended.
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Thanks for tuning into today's episode of Virtually Impossible Presents.
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Presence, Lazy Learning Land podcast.
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Comment below your thoughts on what to do when the honeymoon phase is over.
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What are some things that you are willing to do for your classroom in order to maintain control?
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And what are some things that you have tried that have worked for you in the past?
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Since there is Strength and Lazy, be sure to like, follow, comment,
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and subscribe to this podcast,
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my blog on virtuallyimpossible.net, no apostrophe, and our social media platforms
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on TikTok under Lazy Learning Land,
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on Pinterest, virtually impossible without the apostrophe,
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and Instagram as virtually_Im_possible so you can feel
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at home among other lazy learners until next time live long and lazy and never
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ever ever ever ever work too hard.