OM DENNE EPISODE
Every senior woman I work with says some version of the same thing: "I know I need to work on this, but I'm so busy." The busyness is real. The workload is real. But what most women don't realise is that busyness isn't a neutral holding pattern. Every week you show up without strategic intent, the perception people have of you is hardening. The "safe pair of hands" label, the "reliable executor" reputation, those calcify into how people read you.
In this episode, I name the busyness pattern for what it is, share the research on why perception doesn't wait, and give you a five-minute starting point that breaks the cycle. This episode is for the senior woman who rates her capability at eight or nine and her presence at three or four, and keeps telling herself she'll get to it when things calm down.
KEY TAKEAWAYS
- The gap between capability and presence widens while you wait. Perception isn't static. First impressions and early labels shape how people interpret everything that follows (Asch, 1946; Sullivan, 2019).
- Delivering is safe. Positioning is vulnerable. For women who've built careers on output, claiming space through presence instead of performance feels like a risk. Busyness becomes the acceptable reason to avoid it.
- Unintentional signals are still signals. Research on the Red Sneakers Effect (Bellezza, Gino & Keinan, 2014) shows that deliberate nonconformity signals status and competence, but only when it's perceived as intentional. Showing up without strategic thought sends the opposite signal.
- The "safe pair of hands" perception calcifies over time. The primacy effect means early impressions carry disproportionate weight. The longer the "reliable executor" label sits, the harder it is to shift.
- Working on your presence doesn't require a sabbatical. The first step is diagnostic: naming where the gap between capability and how you're experienced is actually showing up. That takes five minutes.
- Clarity comes before the wardrobe. The first thing that changes isn't what you wear or how you speak. It's your ability to articulate who you are as a leader and how you want to be experienced.
TIMESTAMPS
- 0:00 - Opening: Strategic Presence
- 0:28 - Welcome & Introduction
- 1:24 - The Capability vs. Presence Gap
- 2:20 - When Busyness Becomes the Problem
- 4:04 - Three Women, One Pattern
- 5:53 - The Primacy Effect
- 7:56 - Deliberate vs. Unintentional Presence
- 9:04 - Breaking the Cycle
- 10:21 - Identifying Your Gap
- 12:11 - Take the Leadership Presence Profile
- 12:19 - Final Thoughts
RESEARCH REFERENCED
- Asch, S.E. (1946). Forming impressions of personality. The Journal of Abnormal and Social Psychology, 41(3), 258-290.
- Sullivan, J. (2019). The primacy effect in impression formation: Some replications and extensions. Social Psychological and Personality Science, 10(4), 432-439.
- Bellezza, S., Gino, F. & Keinan, A. (2014). The red sneakers effect: Inferring status and competence from signals of nonconformity. Journal of Consumer Research, 41(1), 35-54.
LINKS AND RESOURCES
➡ Find out what is creating the gap between your capability and how your experience is in under 5 mins. Complete the Leadership Presence Gap Assessment here: Assessment
➡ Download the Wardrobe Guide for women in leadership – Get a curated list of must-have wardrobe staples that blend versatility, style, and impact: Guide
➡ Find out more about programs and services
CONNECT WITH SONYA
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