REDEMPTION IS REAL!

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You can talk about the smoker, you can talk about the fire, the smoker, the slow burning that breaks down through meat and turns it into something that's me.
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But sometimes, sometimes burning out of me.
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And for a long time, the fire in my house wasn't for the bottom.
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The fire was in my.
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They tell you addiction is a beast.
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They don't tell you what happens when the beast finally gets gone.
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Redemption is real.
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Welcome back to Come Get That Smoke.
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I'm your host, Jeff Jordan, also known as Chuck.
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Today we're talking about my dad, Jeff Jordan.
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If you've been following my journey, you know I spent my life standing behind the smoker.
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Learning how to manage heat, patience, and smoke.
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But the most important lessons I ever learned didn't come from a cookbook or a smoker.
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They came from watching my dad file war inside his own skin.
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For years, alcohol didn't just run my dad's life.
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It wrote the rules for.
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It controlled his day-to-day life, his actions, and his relationship with his friends and family.
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Spend a lot of time confused in that kind of environment, waiting for something to change, and wonder how that story would end.
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Then, life hits you with a different kind of blood.
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Sometimes it takes a total system shipping for someone to finally find his way back through himself.
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What happened to bed wasn't just a motherfucking motion, it was a defined away.
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It gave us the father we were always supposed to have, and the father we saw multiple times in the world.
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The baby we're laying all on the table.
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We're talking about generational addiction, the real reality of addiction, and the undeniable grace of the second chance.
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Because if my dad can walk out of that mountain and into the light, it means one thing for all.
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Redemption is real.
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Let's get in.
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He had two brothers, Carl and Glenn Jordan.
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I tell you that information because every one of them fought some kind of addiction or struggled with some type of mental illness.
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The Jordan side of the family was an interesting group.
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Everybody was different, but they always loved and cared about each other.
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Jimmy was my grandfather.
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He was a glass man with Jim's glass for years.
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And that's kind of what he did.
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And he spent a lot of time with us growing up, lots of different activities we do together.
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He spent a lot of time with us.
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He coached a lot of my teams when I was growing up.
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So he was the leader of that family.
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And then you have my grandmother Patricia, or grandma, is what we called her.
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And grandma struggled with addiction.
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She struggled with substance abuse until her older age.
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She ended up having three kids.
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They ended up having three kids, my dad being the middle kid.
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Carl was the oldest.
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My dad was the middle kid, and then Glenn was the youngest.
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And Carl struggled with mental health.
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He lived with us for a long time in a camper behind our house.
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And we'll talk more about that as we continue through.
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And then Glenn was the younger brother.
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And Glenn struggled with addiction too, drugs, alcohol, all those types of things.
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So the Jordan side had a history of substance abuse, a history of mental health illness.
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And that was a reflection of where my daddy came from.
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And that was a reflection of what my daddy grew up around.
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So he saw this from an early age and he fell into that trap, as most people do when you grow up in a situation like that.
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My granddaddy and my dad built our house when I was a kid.
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It was a cedar house up on a hill, and it was beautiful.
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It was one of the nicest houses I've ever had the opportunity to live in.
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He owned a company called Jordan Heating Air for a long time.
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And then he also worked for Davis Heating and Air in Honeywell as an air conditioned guy.
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So he's always been an HVAC guy, went to Tri-County Tech, owned his own business for a while.
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He went all that type of stuff.
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As a kid, love wasn't lacking in my family.
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Even though my dad was an alcoholic.
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And my dad drank beer all the time beer, liquor, whatever you can think about.
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He was a functioning alcoholic.
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He drank when he woke up, he drank before he went to bed.
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But as a kid, love wasn't lacking.
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My dad spent so much time with us.
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He was so consumed in our lives.
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He spent time with us.
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He coached my teams when I was growing up.
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He involved me as much as he possibly could with what he was trying to do.
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I got to work with him growing up.
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But as a kid, I remember certain things that just stand out in my mind.
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I used to be huge on these little things called Mac micro machines.
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It was a little car type thing that come on these, you know, like you buy it, and it comes with probably about a six-inch by six-inch block that folds up.
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When you open it up, it gives you a scene like a street or a farmland or something.
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And then you had like buildings you could put on it, and then you had cars that could ride up and down the road on it.
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And what you would do is you would take those micro machines and you would put them together, and you would have a whole micro machine city.
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So there'd be like you know different settings and different things like that with your micro machines.
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Well, my parents bought me those as a kid because I love to play with them.
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And my dad took a big old piece of plexiglass and he glued down this entire micro machine village or this micro machine city.
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And it would slide under my bed.
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I could pull it out when I wanted to play with it.
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Then when I wanted to put it back up, I just slid it right back under my bed.
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So this was my favorite toy growing up as a kid.
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And my dad took the time to help me build that city, glue that city down, and it allowed me the opportunity to have a toy that I could play with all the time.
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Same thing in the basement of our old house.
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We had He-Man.
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I had a whole little He-Man set up, and you know, it was just great.
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G.I.
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Joe's, another childhood memory of mine.
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I had a whole G.I.
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Joe set up in the basement.
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When it came to personal items and material things, I wasn't spoiled at all.
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My parents bought me what I needed.
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I had toys to play with, but I never got anything extra.
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And that's not a bad thing because what we lacked in material things, my family had in love.
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We loved and cared about each other.
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Me and my mom still to this day talk every day.
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Me and my sister still to this day talk two or three, four, five, six, seven, I mean, seven days a week sometimes.
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Just because we were instilled, it was instilled in us to be a family and to love each other.
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My whole life I grew up hunting and fishing with my dad, sitting in a deer stand in, you know, 30 degree temperatures, waiting on a deer to walk out.
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Very rarely did they walk out.
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He coached all my teams as a kid, all my teams as I was growing up.
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Coached football.
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He coached baseball.
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Never coached basketball, thank goodness, because I don't think he was very good at it.
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And then I wrestled, but I didn't start that till high school.
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So he pretty much coached all of my baseball teams growing up and all of my football teams growing up.
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Discipline and love wasn't lacking in my family either.
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We were disciplined and we were disciplined hard.
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We were expected to do the right thing.
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We were expected to behave ourselves.
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We were expected to conduct ourselves in a way that was acceptable in the community.
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So, a couple of funny stories.
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One time I was growing up, and my dad had a stash of adult stuff that he probably shouldn't have had, movies and magazines and stuff like that.
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And I found the stash, as most of us have done in the past.
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I found the stash, popped one in, I was watching it, daddy found out about it.
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And I'll never forget the way he handled that situation.
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It wasn't anger, it was love.
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He corrected my behavior in a way that he knew how to correct my behavior.
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And then he took that whole stash and he took me outside and he explained to me how bad it was, and he burnt every single bit of it in a big burn barrel.
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And I think back to that experience, and I'm like, he could have beat the ever-living tar out of me for that.
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And he did spank me, there's no doubt about that.
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But at the end of the day, his guilt and the way everything went down, he was extremely disappointed in himself for having that in the house so that I could find it.
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He took responsibility for my knuckleheadness.
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And I still remember that today.
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And I still try my best to parent my kids in a similar fashion.
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But he definitely handled that way better than I think I could because he felt like he had let me down, even though I was the one in the wrong.
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Talking back to mama.
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Yeah, you don't do that.
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Mama was salt of the earth.
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I've said this on other podcasts.
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She's one of the most godly women I know.
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You talk back to mama and daddy heard it, you can forget it.
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You're gonna grab your ankles.
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And if you let go of those ankles while he's tearing that butt up, you can forget it.
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Tobacco.
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He was a tobacco chewer.
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He was a cigarette smoker, he was a beer drinker, a liquor drinker.
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You know, when I was a kid, I remember vividly sitting on the front porch and he was drinking a beer.
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And I said, I want to try something.
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He's like, okay.
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He let me try it.
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And I was at such a young age that when I drank it, I spit it right out.
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It was so nasty.
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And I still don't know to this day why he let me do that, but it's pretty much kept me away from alcohol the majority of my life because I've never had a taste for it.
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Not one time.
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Food on the table, man, when I was growing up, you ate what mama cooked.
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That's just simple.
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My daddy loved chicken livers.
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And I didn't.
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But when mama cooked chicken livers, you had to eat it.
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You didn't have a choice.
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Either you ate chicken livers or you didn't eat at all.
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And that was kind of how it happened until my niece Autumn came along, my sister's daughter, and she ended up moving in with us when we were young, or when she was young.
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I was already in high school by that point.
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And the only time that rule changed was when Autumn came in to the picture.
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Because Autumn ate whatever she wanted to, chicken fingers and French fries.
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And that's what she was expected to eat.
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She didn't have to eat like we did.
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She didn't have to eat everything Mama cooked.
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So Autumn got treated a whole lot different than me and Hope did growing up.
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But it's also a grandkid, not a real kid.
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I mean, not not a not a not a kid, like a child or whatever.
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Even though Autumn was raised like a little sister to me, she's still my niece.
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So she's my sister's child, but when mom ended up raising her.
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The rules changed when Autumn came into the world.
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Um, the eat whatever, eat what was on the table rule, it didn't apply to Autumn.
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It never did.
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We were expected to be good citizens.
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We were expected to carry ourselves in a respectable manner.
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My sister were to dress moderate, I mean modest.
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She wasn't allowed to go out looking trashy.
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Uh we were always clean, well kept.
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We were taught to be respectful.
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We were always taught to do your best.
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And then this is gonna sound extremely strange, but he always taught us to not drink and smoke.
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Always encouraged us to stay away from that.
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Even though he was an addict.
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It's that simple.
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He was an alcoholic.
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He loved alcohol.
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And the part that always surprises me about that situation is how hard he pushed for us to stay away from that stuff because he knew it wasn't good.
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He knew that it could send you in a spiral and take your life places you don't want to go because he had experienced it.
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He'd experienced his whole life.
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He saw his parents have addictions, he saw his brothers with addictions, he saw his brothers battling mental health, he saw his, you know, his nephews battling mental health.
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He saw his nephews battling addiction as they grew older.
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So he witnessed all this stuff and he knew that wasn't a life that he wanted for his kids, even though it was a life that he lived.
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My daddy wasn't an overbearing person.
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He wasn't hard on us all the time.
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He wasn't mean.
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He was an alcoholic, though.
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But the one thing about my story that stands out from other people's stories is that my dad wasn't a mean alcoholic.
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He was present, he functioned like normal.
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But he was an alcoholic.
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So it did change some of the ways he thought, some of the actions he had.
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Those things were different.
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But my story is not about abuse and neglect and choosing alcohol over family.
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Even though he did that, he still did what he had to do to make sure we had what we needed.
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And that's one of the things about my story that makes it so different from most people.
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Most people that deal with it come from a family that has addiction or an alcoholic family, alcoholic background, their lives were tough.
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They were beat on, they were hit on, they were not taken care of, they were not provided for.
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We didn't have that.
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And my family was so two-sided.
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My dad was an alcoholic.
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My mom saw the earth, godliest woman I know.
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That simple.
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My mom made sure we were provided for.
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She made sure we had everything we needed.
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She made sure we were protected.
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And my dad did the same.
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He just did it in a different way because his mindset wasn't always clear because he was constantly drinking.
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Whether it be alcohol, whether it be beer.
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Later on he got into prescription medication.
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I'm sure he smoked some weed at some point, there's no doubt about that.
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But I mean, I don't know all the details on that.
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I just know what I remember specifically.
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So my experience with alcoholism is a little bit different than other people's because my house was a loving house.
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My daddy showed up.
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When I was growing up, as a teenager, I got older and I started witnessing stuff.
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My dad was a family guy.
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Family mattered to him.
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It mattered to him.
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Alcohol mattered to him.
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Alcohol might have mattered a little bit more than family, but not a whole lot.
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My daddy was present.
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He always showed up.
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No doubt about it.
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He was at my games when I was growing up.
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He was at my high school games.
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He was at my college games.
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He was at my rec games because he was coaching those.
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He was very supportive.
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The one place you didn't find him very often was church.
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But he would go through phases.
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Like he got clean when I was in middle school.
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And we had a pastor at that time, and I cannot remember his name.
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At Calpin's First Baptist.
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He had two daughters in our youth group.
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And he him and Daddy became good friends.
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And Daddy got saved, became a deacon, changed his whole lifestyle.
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Just changed his whole lifestyle.
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And they would go fishing together, they'd go trout fishing together.
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I remember a couple of times we went trout fishing together with the pastor, spent the whole weekend up there and just having a blast.
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And my dad was functioning.
00:15:06.000 --> 00:15:10.639
Kim Bolin was one of his good friends who was a good influence on my father.
00:15:10.799 --> 00:15:12.960
John Hopper, a good influence on my father.
00:15:13.039 --> 00:15:15.600
That's actually who my mom remarried just recently.
00:15:15.759 --> 00:15:17.759
And he was always a good influence on my dad.
00:15:17.919 --> 00:15:20.480
My dad, when he was good, he was good.
00:15:21.120 --> 00:15:23.600
But like addiction, it don't always just disappear.
00:15:23.679 --> 00:15:24.879
It takes time.
00:15:25.200 --> 00:15:29.120
Sometimes people fall right back into that addiction after they've been out of it for a time.
00:15:29.600 --> 00:15:33.440
And my dad was one of those people, he just could never get away from it.
00:15:33.840 --> 00:15:37.759
He would always go back and always go back and always go back.
00:15:37.919 --> 00:15:40.320
It was just a repetitive cycle for him.
00:15:40.559 --> 00:15:44.960
And he consistently kept going back and forth, back and forth, back and forth.
00:15:45.200 --> 00:15:48.080
And my dad was a great guy.
00:15:48.320 --> 00:15:49.519
He loved his family.
00:15:49.759 --> 00:15:52.639
And his life was a roller coaster.
00:15:52.799 --> 00:16:02.159
Because he would be straight, he would be good out of addiction, living a great life, functioning as a church deacon, doing all these things the right way.
00:16:02.720 --> 00:16:06.080
And then all of a sudden, boom, addiction back in his life.
00:16:06.240 --> 00:16:08.720
And it's like it just took his legs out from under it.
00:16:08.879 --> 00:16:17.519
It was a generational curse, in my opinion, or a generational behavior that he learned early.
00:16:17.600 --> 00:16:19.200
And he never could shake it.
00:16:19.440 --> 00:16:23.039
Never could shake it when I watched him as I grew up.
00:16:23.440 --> 00:16:24.639
He was a family man.
00:16:24.720 --> 00:16:26.720
And I say that he loved his family.
00:16:26.799 --> 00:16:30.159
He loved his mama, he loved his daddy, he loved his brothers.
00:16:30.240 --> 00:16:32.399
And one of his brothers was really hard to love.
00:16:32.559 --> 00:16:37.759
Constantly stayed in trouble, constantly caused issues, constantly doing knucklehead types of things.
00:16:37.840 --> 00:16:40.240
And then you had one of his other brothers, Carl.
00:16:40.480 --> 00:16:43.279
And Carl was he'd struggled with mental health.
00:16:43.440 --> 00:16:44.320
It's that simple.
00:16:44.559 --> 00:16:46.879
He was, he had he struggled with mental health.
00:16:47.039 --> 00:16:49.679
And he lived with us for years behind us.
00:16:50.000 --> 00:16:52.639
We had a little camper down there that he would live in.
00:16:52.879 --> 00:16:59.039
And Carl lived there from the time from the time we moved to River Drive in Spartanburg.
00:16:59.279 --> 00:17:01.600
He lived with us in that camper for years.
00:17:01.919 --> 00:17:05.759
He had gone through a divorce with his wife and his two kids.
00:17:05.920 --> 00:17:13.599
And they had moved to a different his wife and kids had moved away, and Carl had nowhere to go, so he came and lived behind us in a camper.
00:17:13.680 --> 00:17:15.359
And we plugged him into the side of the house.
00:17:15.440 --> 00:17:34.079
And I'll never forget, Carl was one of the most interesting people I can remember vividly sitting on the front porch, just listening to Carl tell stories, just watching his behaviors, just listening to him play the squeeze box, listening to him sing.
00:17:34.480 --> 00:17:36.480
Like Carl was he was an artist.
00:17:36.559 --> 00:17:46.960
He did all these little geograms and stuff where you have like one side of the picture matches the other side of the picture, and if you fold it up, they kind of I don't know, it's like all kinds of shapes and stuff and different colors.
00:17:47.039 --> 00:17:49.759
And I have some of those still to the day that I I love them.
00:17:49.920 --> 00:17:50.640
And I love them.
00:17:50.720 --> 00:17:51.519
I think they're awesome.
00:17:51.680 --> 00:17:52.319
And he did that.
00:17:52.400 --> 00:17:53.440
That's one of the things he did.
00:17:53.519 --> 00:17:54.319
He was an artist.
00:17:54.400 --> 00:17:56.640
And with that art, he did music also.
00:17:56.720 --> 00:17:59.920
So he had a squeeze box that he played constantly.
00:18:00.319 --> 00:18:03.119
He would just crack me up.
00:18:03.519 --> 00:18:05.599
So he'd be down there, it'd be two o'clock in the morning.
00:18:05.680 --> 00:18:09.119
I'd be laying in bed, and all of a sudden I hear the squeeze box go.
00:18:09.519 --> 00:18:14.000
Just like a, I don't even know exactly what it is, but it's an accordion, I think they call it.
00:18:14.160 --> 00:18:18.799
And he would just play that squeeze box all hours of the day, all hours of the night.
00:18:18.960 --> 00:18:22.720
I remember vividly one night, it was probably two o'clock in the morning.
00:18:22.960 --> 00:18:26.480
And he's down there just going to town on that squeeze box.
00:18:26.559 --> 00:18:28.559
You can hear it at our house.
00:18:28.720 --> 00:18:31.599
And I hear Daddy get up, walk across his bedroom.
00:18:31.680 --> 00:18:33.920
Because upstairs, you know, our house was an old mill house.
00:18:34.240 --> 00:18:36.640
You could hear everything, even the stuff going on downstairs.
00:18:36.799 --> 00:18:38.000
I could hear it in my bedroom.
00:18:38.160 --> 00:18:42.160
So he got up, I heard him, he walked to the front door, I heard the front door open.
00:18:42.240 --> 00:18:45.359
And at this point, I'm getting up myself because I want to hear what's about to happen.
00:18:45.680 --> 00:18:52.640
Daddy walks outside and all he does is unplug the cord to Carl's trailer, and everything goes black.
00:18:53.039 --> 00:18:55.039
I can't repeat what Carl said.
00:18:55.599 --> 00:19:01.039
It wasn't very nice, but it was along the lines of holy crap.
00:19:01.759 --> 00:19:03.200
What is going on?
00:19:03.359 --> 00:19:08.960
And all I hear my daddy say is, shut that squeeze box off and go to bed.
00:19:09.599 --> 00:19:15.440
And Daddy plugged the camper back in, walked back inside, closed that door, and went right back to sleep.
00:19:15.759 --> 00:19:21.200
Carl didn't play that squeeze box squeeze box much that much after dark, after that point.
00:19:21.519 --> 00:19:25.200
It's just so funny to me because at that moment I laughed.
00:19:25.279 --> 00:19:27.279
I was just laying in bed like this is hilarious.
00:19:27.920 --> 00:19:29.519
Who else has this experience?
00:19:29.680 --> 00:19:30.880
Who else gets to see this?
00:19:31.039 --> 00:19:33.039
Who else gets gets to witness this?
00:19:33.200 --> 00:19:35.039
And that just tells you a little bit about Carl.
00:19:35.119 --> 00:19:36.880
He was just a free spirit.
00:19:37.200 --> 00:19:38.160
And I love that guy.
00:19:38.240 --> 00:19:41.759
He taught me so many lessons growing up, some good, some bad.
00:19:42.160 --> 00:19:44.559
But he was just such a great individual.
00:19:45.440 --> 00:19:49.920
And and the mental illness he had just made him who he was.
00:19:50.319 --> 00:19:51.599
And that's just how we knew him.
00:19:51.839 --> 00:19:55.359
That's how we that's why we loved him so much because of who he was.
00:19:55.440 --> 00:19:56.319
He was so eccentric.
00:19:56.400 --> 00:19:58.720
He was so free-spirited.
00:19:58.960 --> 00:19:59.519
I loved that.
00:19:59.680 --> 00:20:00.799
But my dad loved car.
00:20:01.200 --> 00:20:01.839
He loved car.
00:20:02.079 --> 00:20:03.279
My dad was a heat and air guy.
00:20:03.359 --> 00:20:11.759
So he would bring all these old units home and all these old parts and equipment and all kinds of stuff that he would take out of houses when he put new equipment in.
00:20:11.839 --> 00:20:15.519
And Carl would stand in our backyard and he would just dissect it all.
00:20:15.680 --> 00:20:17.519
He would take every piece of copper off.
00:20:17.680 --> 00:20:21.359
He would take every wire to burn it in a burn barrel to get the copper out of it.
00:20:21.680 --> 00:20:28.400
He would separate your stainless steel from your aluminum, your aluminum from your cast cast iron or whatever.
00:20:28.480 --> 00:20:31.359
I don't know all the terms, but he would scrap.
00:20:31.440 --> 00:20:33.759
And my daddy and him, they had that bond.
00:20:34.079 --> 00:20:36.160
They had that bond together where they spent time.
00:20:36.480 --> 00:20:38.960
Now Carl would get on my daddy's nerves now.
00:20:39.519 --> 00:20:41.920
He would get on my daddy's nerves in a minute.
00:20:42.160 --> 00:20:43.200
But they loved each other.
00:20:43.279 --> 00:20:45.039
They had that brotherly bond.
00:20:45.359 --> 00:20:47.680
But you know, the thing about my dad was he showed up.
00:20:47.839 --> 00:20:49.039
He showed up for us as a family.
00:20:49.119 --> 00:20:50.480
He showed up for me as an athlete.
00:20:50.799 --> 00:20:54.079
Even when I was in college, him and mama would make the trip no matter where we were playing.
00:20:54.319 --> 00:21:00.480
And I mean I I had the ability, I mean, I had the privilege to start as a freshman at North Greenville as a center.
00:21:00.960 --> 00:21:16.319
And Cumberland, Kentucky, Union, Kentucky, Cumberland, Tennessee, Gardner Webb, wherever we went, Wingate, wherever we went to play, they were there.
00:21:16.720 --> 00:21:19.519
They were there, UVA-Y in Virginia.
00:21:20.079 --> 00:21:20.799
They were there.
00:21:20.960 --> 00:21:25.200
They would come to every single game and show us that support.
00:21:25.359 --> 00:21:30.640
And some of the happiest moments of my life were coming down coming out of the elevator at our team hotel.
00:21:30.799 --> 00:21:32.240
And this is small college football.
00:21:32.319 --> 00:21:35.440
I'm not acting like I'm some kind of great football player, because I definitely wasn't.
00:21:35.599 --> 00:21:38.640
I was average at best, but I worked hard.
00:21:39.519 --> 00:21:42.079
And I was going to outwork you when it came to that.
00:21:42.640 --> 00:21:46.960
And that's just one of the things that that I was good at was outworking people.
00:21:47.279 --> 00:21:52.400
And with my situation as a college football player, it wasn't like I was playing Division I.
00:21:52.559 --> 00:21:53.599
I was playing NAI.
00:21:54.160 --> 00:21:58.480
Um and I loved the game, and that's why I played.
00:22:00.319 --> 00:22:01.839
I wasn't that strong.
00:22:02.079 --> 00:22:03.920
I definitely wasn't fast.
00:22:04.319 --> 00:22:05.759
I was definitely fat.
00:22:06.000 --> 00:22:08.400
I definitely wasn't fast, but I was fat.
00:22:08.880 --> 00:22:10.480
And I just loved playing.
00:22:10.640 --> 00:22:13.200
And I gave it everything I had because I didn't know anybody.
00:22:13.440 --> 00:22:14.559
I didn't know anything else.
00:22:14.720 --> 00:22:17.680
I only knew one speed, and that's what I was taught to be.
00:22:17.920 --> 00:22:19.359
And they always showed up.
00:22:19.440 --> 00:22:22.400
So I'd come down these, you know, it would be like a comfort inn or something.
00:22:22.480 --> 00:22:23.519
It wasn't nothing fancy.
00:22:23.680 --> 00:22:26.559
They'd put us in the cheapest hotels we could possibly have.
00:22:26.799 --> 00:22:31.519
And I'd come down the elevator and I'd walk out into the lobby and I'd see mom and dad.
00:22:31.599 --> 00:22:37.279
And I will be honest with you, as a college football player, that was a great feeling for me.
00:22:37.519 --> 00:22:42.079
It was great for me to have that support of my mom and dad being at those games.
00:22:42.160 --> 00:22:43.359
And my dad showed up.
00:22:43.680 --> 00:22:48.240
Didn't matter what he had to miss, didn't matter what he had to put to the side.
00:22:48.559 --> 00:22:49.759
He showed up.
00:22:50.319 --> 00:22:54.720
Now, when I was in high school, my dad went through this little phase where he left.
00:22:54.960 --> 00:22:57.440
Um, he went and did his own thing.
00:22:57.680 --> 00:22:59.920
And he got caught up with some bad people.
00:23:00.400 --> 00:23:02.400
Let's gonna be honest with you, just bad people.
00:23:02.559 --> 00:23:06.079
People that if I were to see today, I have no use for them.
00:23:06.160 --> 00:23:07.200
I wouldn't speak to them.
00:23:07.359 --> 00:23:08.400
I don't hate them.
00:23:08.559 --> 00:23:09.680
I dislike them.
00:23:09.839 --> 00:23:14.079
I dislike what they were involved in.
00:23:14.240 --> 00:23:16.160
I dislike that they involved my daddy in it.
00:23:16.240 --> 00:23:18.960
But at the same time, my daddy made that choice.
00:23:19.119 --> 00:23:24.720
So you can't hate someone when you have free will to do what you want to.
00:23:24.880 --> 00:23:26.240
And my daddy chose to do that.
00:23:26.319 --> 00:23:31.119
So he got hooked up with these this group of people down in Cliffdale or Clifton.
00:23:31.279 --> 00:23:32.799
I guess is the best way to put it.
00:23:32.880 --> 00:23:33.759
And he left.
00:23:33.920 --> 00:23:34.720
And we didn't see him.
00:23:34.880 --> 00:23:41.759
Like he would come by during the day while we were at school and take a shower, change clothes, get his stuff, and he'd go back out and do whatever he wanted to.
00:23:41.920 --> 00:23:42.880
We didn't know where he would stand.
00:23:43.200 --> 00:23:44.799
I mean mama knew probably.
00:23:44.960 --> 00:23:47.920
But she would not, you know, she would never tell us that.
00:23:48.000 --> 00:23:53.680
And still to this day I've never asked because it's not something I want my mom to have to relive.
00:23:53.759 --> 00:23:56.640
And if you know my mom, she put up with it a lot.
00:23:56.880 --> 00:23:59.440
My mom married my dad at an early age.
00:23:59.680 --> 00:24:03.279
My sister was born when my mom was 16 years old, I think.
00:24:03.839 --> 00:24:09.759
Um and it started early.
00:24:09.839 --> 00:24:11.359
They got married, they lived together.
00:24:11.519 --> 00:24:14.240
My mom was faithful that entire time.
00:24:14.480 --> 00:24:23.440
My mom loved my dad through every single addiction, through every single dumb mistake, through everything.
00:24:23.680 --> 00:24:30.240
And the last 10, 12, 10, 12, 15 years of her of my dad's life, my mom was a caregiver.
00:24:30.400 --> 00:24:32.799
She took care of him because of the stroke that he had.
00:24:32.960 --> 00:24:37.519
We'll talk more about that as we move forward, but my mom had to deal with a lot.
00:24:37.599 --> 00:24:41.440
And when my dad left, it wasn't a weight off her shoulder.
00:24:41.680 --> 00:24:45.279
Like some relationships, people are like, oh, thank God they're gone.
00:24:45.519 --> 00:24:45.839
No.
00:24:46.160 --> 00:24:48.079
That was not the case with my mom.
00:24:48.160 --> 00:24:50.400
That was not something easy.
00:24:50.480 --> 00:24:52.160
That's not the kind of person she is.
00:24:52.319 --> 00:24:55.920
She's a, I made a commitment, I'm gonna stick it out.
00:24:56.160 --> 00:24:58.319
You made a commitment, you're gonna stick it out.
00:24:58.480 --> 00:24:59.839
And that's what she did.
00:25:00.079 --> 00:25:03.759
And her love for my dad was unbelievable.
00:25:03.920 --> 00:25:09.680
She loved him through everything, through every stupid mistake, through every stupid decision.
00:25:09.920 --> 00:25:12.240
She loved him and loved him wholeheartedly.
00:25:12.400 --> 00:25:18.000
So when he left and was doing his little nonsense with these worthless people, I say worthless, I can't say that.
00:25:18.079 --> 00:25:18.799
I don't need to say that.
00:25:19.119 --> 00:25:20.079
That's not appropriate.
00:25:20.240 --> 00:25:22.559
I'm not gonna say worthless because everybody has worth.
00:25:22.880 --> 00:25:26.880
But these people that at the time were in the same situation my dad was.
00:25:26.960 --> 00:25:27.839
They were addicts.
00:25:28.000 --> 00:25:35.200
I'm sure they were out stealing and scrapping and stealing, just doing stuff that you shouldn't do.
00:25:35.519 --> 00:25:39.839
And my mom had to deal with that.
00:25:40.160 --> 00:25:43.039
But my mom never once in front of me.
00:25:43.359 --> 00:25:46.240
My sister had gone by this point, and she was being a knucklehead too.
00:25:46.319 --> 00:25:47.920
So we still talk about that a good bit.
00:25:48.240 --> 00:25:54.000
But she was she was being a knucklehead, and maybe that maybe maybe this is before that.
00:25:54.160 --> 00:25:55.519
Maybe we were both still at home.
00:25:55.599 --> 00:25:58.559
But we had to live with the it was actually middle school.
00:25:58.640 --> 00:25:59.039
I remember that.
00:25:59.519 --> 00:26:01.440
It was in middle school when he left.
00:26:01.759 --> 00:26:06.000
And it was tough because mama had to be strong.
00:26:06.319 --> 00:26:07.200
Mama had to provide.
00:26:07.359 --> 00:26:08.480
Mama had to get us to school.
00:26:08.640 --> 00:26:10.240
Mama had to pick us up.
00:26:10.720 --> 00:26:12.240
Mama had to be at our games.
00:26:12.400 --> 00:26:14.000
And me and my sister were both athletes.
00:26:14.079 --> 00:26:15.039
We played high school ball.
00:26:15.680 --> 00:26:17.359
I was playing middle school at the time.
00:26:17.599 --> 00:26:18.720
And we were active.
00:26:18.880 --> 00:26:20.480
We were encouraged to be active.
00:26:20.640 --> 00:26:22.400
We were encouraged to play sports.
00:26:22.720 --> 00:26:25.839
And during that situation, everything fell on my mom.
00:26:26.079 --> 00:26:31.519
And as a kid, and even a middle schooler, sometimes you're oblivious to everything that takes place.
00:26:31.680 --> 00:26:33.680
And my mom had to do a lot.
00:26:33.759 --> 00:26:34.799
She had to keep it fed.
00:26:34.880 --> 00:26:36.640
She still worked a full-time job.
00:26:37.200 --> 00:26:42.640
She's done everything you can think of as a parent to make sure that we had what we needed.
00:26:42.880 --> 00:26:51.839
But eventually my dad came around and came back home and just things were normal.
00:26:52.160 --> 00:26:54.079
Normal, if you want to call it normal.
00:26:54.240 --> 00:26:56.079
But I mean it was like a roller coaster for us.
00:26:56.160 --> 00:27:00.640
It was daddy was drinking, doing things he wasn't supposed to, and then Daddy was saved.
00:27:00.880 --> 00:27:05.359
He was in church every Sunday, and he was trying to live the best life he possibly could.
00:27:05.599 --> 00:27:08.240
Then, bam, he hits a brick wall.
00:27:08.400 --> 00:27:14.960
Something, something took place to make him revert back to his old lifestyle.
00:27:15.200 --> 00:27:17.680
It just happened over and over and over again.
00:27:17.839 --> 00:27:19.039
It was just so repetitive.
00:27:19.119 --> 00:27:21.119
He'd get off drugs and alcohol.
00:27:21.279 --> 00:27:23.039
He'd go right back to drugs and alcohol.
00:27:23.200 --> 00:27:27.119
He'd get off drugs and alcohol, and he would be fine for years.
00:27:27.680 --> 00:27:30.720
And then bam, something happens, he's right back on it again.
00:27:30.880 --> 00:27:32.960
And I never could understand that.
00:27:33.680 --> 00:27:42.400
I never could figure out why he had to continue to go back until I got older and I realized addiction is hard.
00:27:42.480 --> 00:27:43.359
It's not easy.
00:27:43.519 --> 00:27:45.279
And it never goes away.
00:27:46.079 --> 00:27:49.680
You have to constantly win that battle on a daily basis.
00:27:49.839 --> 00:27:51.279
And I had to learn that.
00:27:51.440 --> 00:27:53.200
And it took me a long time to learn that.
00:27:53.359 --> 00:27:58.000
Because for a long time as a kid, I was like, why?
00:27:58.319 --> 00:28:00.640
Why is that more important than me?
00:28:01.599 --> 00:28:05.920
Why is that lifestyle more important than me and my mama and my sister?
00:28:06.160 --> 00:28:08.240
Why is that lifestyle more important?
00:28:08.720 --> 00:28:11.839
And the older I get, I realize it wasn't more important.
00:28:12.400 --> 00:28:13.359
We were important.
00:28:13.519 --> 00:28:15.680
He just didn't know how to beat that addiction.
00:28:15.920 --> 00:28:18.400
He didn't have an idea of how to defeat it.
00:28:18.640 --> 00:28:24.480
And instead of getting upset and mad like I did when I was a kid, I didn't show a lot of that.
00:28:24.720 --> 00:28:27.680
And I didn't talk about it a whole lot because one, I was embarrassed.
00:28:32.880 --> 00:28:33.759
We practiced.
00:28:33.920 --> 00:28:36.160
And he was just not himself.
00:28:36.480 --> 00:28:42.960
He was out there on the football field and he was just teaching us how to like teaching us to get into offensive line stance.
00:28:43.119 --> 00:28:53.920
He was talking about sinking your hips before you fall forward on your hand, just simple, basic techniques, and he kept saying, squat like you're about to take a you know what in the woods, a crap in the woods.
00:28:54.000 --> 00:28:56.960
And I'm like, where is this coming from?
00:28:57.759 --> 00:29:02.480
And I started to then realize that he was drunk.
00:29:02.640 --> 00:29:04.240
And he had drove me to practice.
00:29:04.400 --> 00:29:07.039
And we had practiced, and then he had drove me home.
00:29:07.440 --> 00:29:14.799
And it just started to resound in me that that's not him.
00:29:15.119 --> 00:29:16.640
That's his addiction.
00:29:16.880 --> 00:29:20.240
And when I learned that, my whole perspective of my dad changed.
00:29:20.319 --> 00:29:21.519
Like my dad loved me.
00:29:21.680 --> 00:29:24.720
There's no doubt in my mind that he loved me.
00:29:24.880 --> 00:29:27.440
My dad spent so much time with me.
00:29:27.839 --> 00:29:29.519
He involved me so much.
00:29:29.680 --> 00:29:34.720
He took me to do things that taught me how to fish, taught me how to hunt, involved me in that.
00:29:35.200 --> 00:29:37.279
And he cared about us.
00:29:37.519 --> 00:29:38.400
He truly did.
00:29:38.480 --> 00:29:40.880
But alcohol ruled his life.
00:29:41.200 --> 00:29:43.200
Alcohol took center stage.
00:29:43.359 --> 00:29:45.279
And it wasn't that he didn't love me.
00:29:45.440 --> 00:29:47.599
It wasn't that he didn't want to spend time with me.
00:29:47.839 --> 00:29:56.079
He didn't know how to beat the demon or the beast that was inside of him that continued to take him back to that drugs and alcohol.
00:29:56.240 --> 00:29:59.039
And when I say drugs, I'm not talking about hardcore.
00:29:59.119 --> 00:30:01.119
I'm talking about prescription drugs.
00:30:01.599 --> 00:30:02.640
Prescription drugs.
00:30:02.799 --> 00:30:07.200
And you know as well as I do, that's what my grandmother was addicted to.
00:30:07.359 --> 00:30:09.039
That's what my cousins were addicted to.
00:30:09.119 --> 00:30:16.160
That's what my uncles were addicted to because they would go take her medicine so they could get there high.
00:30:16.799 --> 00:30:24.000
And then that would leave her without the medicine she needed, but at the same time, she would be in the same situation there.
00:30:24.880 --> 00:30:27.359
So she was as guilty as they were.
00:30:27.680 --> 00:30:31.359
And it was just a revolving door that they just couldn't get out of.
00:30:31.519 --> 00:30:34.480
And my dad, you know, I used to ask myself as a kid, why?
00:30:34.640 --> 00:30:36.319
Why that and not us?
00:30:36.640 --> 00:30:43.519
Why that and not my mama who sacrifices and gives everything she can possibly give to him.
00:30:43.920 --> 00:30:45.759
Why that and not her?
00:30:46.960 --> 00:30:53.920
And it took me a long time, college, high school, to realize that it wasn't him.
00:30:54.079 --> 00:30:55.279
It was the beast.
00:30:55.519 --> 00:30:59.359
It was the beast that was inside of him that he was trying to defeat on a daily basis.
00:30:59.599 --> 00:31:04.000
A couple of things when I think back, man, I think back to some words that describe my dad.
00:31:04.160 --> 00:31:05.839
And I'm just gonna be real with you.
00:31:06.000 --> 00:31:07.519
There's a lot of them.
00:31:08.000 --> 00:31:09.359
My dad was loving.
00:31:10.400 --> 00:31:15.759
Every time I see a game cock, anything gamecocks, it makes me think of my dad because he was a goat gamecock guy.
00:31:15.920 --> 00:31:18.000
He loved South Carolina gangcocks.
00:31:18.319 --> 00:31:19.759
Not sure why.
00:31:20.720 --> 00:31:21.599
But he did.
00:31:21.759 --> 00:31:22.720
He loved them.
00:31:22.880 --> 00:31:24.720
And you know they've been bad at times.
00:31:24.880 --> 00:31:26.720
They've been real bad at times.
00:31:27.039 --> 00:31:29.279
But he loved the gamecocks.
00:31:29.359 --> 00:31:30.480
He was a NASCAR fan.
00:31:30.559 --> 00:31:32.640
That's where my love for Bill Elliott comes from.
00:31:33.200 --> 00:31:35.200
Just, we love NASCAR.
00:31:35.359 --> 00:31:43.279
We'd sit on Sundays after church and we'd watch the race from the time I was little until the time I graduated college.
00:31:43.440 --> 00:31:44.559
Or I was still at home.
00:31:44.960 --> 00:31:46.319
That was our Sunday ritual.
00:31:46.559 --> 00:31:50.960
Watch the first 50 laps, I'd take a nap, wake up and watch the last 50 laps.
00:31:51.200 --> 00:31:53.200
We did that every single Sunday.
00:31:53.440 --> 00:31:54.400
He was witty.
00:31:54.559 --> 00:32:00.480
He had one of the greatest sense of humors that was so mild because he didn't talk a lot.
00:32:00.559 --> 00:32:02.000
He was very quiet.
00:32:02.319 --> 00:32:08.319
But his sense of humor, he could say things that just made you be like, where did that come from?
00:32:08.480 --> 00:32:09.359
That's hilarious.
00:32:09.440 --> 00:32:10.559
But then he wouldn't say nothing.
00:32:10.640 --> 00:32:13.920
He just so mild-mannered, so quiet.
00:32:14.160 --> 00:32:15.599
He raised us that way, too.
00:32:15.680 --> 00:32:17.359
He wasn't in your face kind of daddy.
00:32:17.519 --> 00:32:18.799
He wasn't yelling and screaming.
00:32:18.880 --> 00:32:21.200
He wasn't, you know, whipping belts everywhere.
00:32:21.279 --> 00:32:22.079
Now you did what you were.
00:32:22.319 --> 00:32:26.079
If you did something you weren't supposed to, he would beat the tar out of you.
00:32:26.240 --> 00:32:30.960
And I was okay with that because I'm smart enough to know I deserved a lot of those.
00:32:31.119 --> 00:32:33.920
And I probably didn't get them sometimes when I did deserve them.
00:32:34.160 --> 00:32:35.440
And mama was just as bad.
00:32:35.519 --> 00:32:36.640
She'd beat us too.
00:32:37.359 --> 00:32:42.240
I say beat us, she'd whoop us, and you know, it kept us straight and kept us out of line, uh, kept us in line.
00:32:42.400 --> 00:32:43.920
My daddy was definitely hard-headed.
00:32:44.000 --> 00:32:46.319
And when I say hard-headed, I mean hard-headed.
00:32:46.480 --> 00:32:49.279
It took him numerous times to learn lessons.
00:32:49.519 --> 00:32:52.079
He would continue to do the same thing over and over again.
00:32:52.319 --> 00:32:54.160
He was extremely hard, hard-headed.
00:32:54.319 --> 00:32:58.319
He was a hunter, he was a fisherman, he was an HVAC guy.
00:32:58.559 --> 00:33:20.079
I can tell you that as a kid growing up in a house with a father who owned his own business and was an HVAC guy, you got screwed 90% of the time because every job that he needed somebody to climb underneath the house and run ductwork or cut vent holes or put boots in the vents, vent holes, anytime somebody had to go into the tight space, it was my big butt.
00:33:20.240 --> 00:33:20.960
Period.
00:33:21.279 --> 00:33:23.039
Me, I've never been a small guy.
00:33:23.200 --> 00:33:33.279
If you've known me, I was a little fat kid, I was a little fat middle, I was a bigger fat middle school kid, I was a bigger, fat high school kid, and I was a bigger fat college kid.
00:33:33.440 --> 00:33:34.480
It's that simple.
00:33:34.640 --> 00:33:35.839
That's just who I was.
00:33:36.000 --> 00:33:40.799
But he would put me in some of the tightest spots as an HVAC guy.
00:33:40.960 --> 00:33:45.440
He would send me up underneath these houses, and once I got in there, you wouldn't turn it over.
00:33:45.599 --> 00:33:51.519
I'd have to crawl back out and then slide back up on my back so I could work because it was so tight underneath some of these houses.
00:33:51.680 --> 00:33:56.559
Some of the stuff I saw, the bugs, the rats, the snakes.
00:33:56.960 --> 00:33:57.839
He didn't care.
00:33:58.000 --> 00:33:59.680
I'd have to get underneath there and get it done.
00:33:59.759 --> 00:34:02.640
And that goes back to last week's podcast, you know, just put your head down.
00:34:02.720 --> 00:34:03.680
That's what I had to do.
00:34:04.160 --> 00:34:05.599
My daddy was still that in me too.
00:34:05.680 --> 00:34:06.559
My grandpa and my daddy.
00:34:06.640 --> 00:34:07.839
Just got to get the job done, dude.
00:34:08.000 --> 00:34:08.880
Figure it out.
00:34:09.039 --> 00:34:10.719
You know, it's not that complicated.
00:34:10.880 --> 00:34:12.079
Just get in there and get it done.
00:34:12.239 --> 00:34:14.320
And he would send me up there to do that kind of stuff.
00:34:14.400 --> 00:34:20.719
So, and I think back now, and you know, we had a conversation a long time ago, and I was like, why'd you used to do that to me all the time?
00:34:21.280 --> 00:34:24.239
And Daddy would flat out told me, So I didn't want you to do what I had to do.
00:34:24.400 --> 00:34:26.079
I didn't want you to do what I did.
00:34:26.320 --> 00:34:27.920
He said, I want you to do something else.
00:34:28.079 --> 00:34:30.159
I want you to do something better than me.
00:34:30.800 --> 00:34:37.280
And, you know, so he very much involved me in that side of his life too.
00:34:37.440 --> 00:34:39.360
My dad was extremely loyal.
00:34:39.599 --> 00:34:42.880
Um, I mean, just to be honest with you, he was loyal.
00:34:43.119 --> 00:34:44.400
He was very smart.
00:34:44.719 --> 00:34:50.000
And a lot of people wouldn't know that about him because he was a little redneck kid that, you know, caused a lot of trouble.
00:34:50.079 --> 00:34:53.840
He was one of those smoking in the tree at school during school hours.
00:34:54.000 --> 00:34:58.400
He was just a knucklehead running around doing stuff he wasn't supposed to, but he was smart.
00:34:58.559 --> 00:34:59.920
And he was life smart.
00:35:00.079 --> 00:35:01.199
He knew how to do stuff.
00:35:01.280 --> 00:35:06.559
He knew how to plumb, he knew how to run electrical, he knew how to build stuff, he knew how to do HVAC work.
00:35:06.800 --> 00:35:09.920
My dad was smart, but he was also a smart ass, and you have to understand that.
00:35:10.000 --> 00:35:10.639
That's how he was.
00:35:10.719 --> 00:35:16.960
He had some kind of he had something to say, smart, if you made him.
00:35:17.199 --> 00:35:23.679
You know, he would he would definitely smart off to you or come back at you or crack a joke on you or whatever.
00:35:23.920 --> 00:35:28.880
And it was always interesting to me that he did that because that's kind of how I am today.
00:35:28.960 --> 00:35:29.599
I'm the same way.
00:35:29.760 --> 00:35:34.719
And Hadley, my daughter, little chop, she is the same exact way.
00:35:34.880 --> 00:35:35.760
She's just like us.
00:35:35.840 --> 00:35:37.440
She's got a smart illicit attitude.
00:35:37.599 --> 00:35:41.920
And she'll pop off or she'll say something, you know, she's but she's hilarious.
00:35:42.079 --> 00:35:42.800
She's hilarious.
00:35:42.880 --> 00:35:43.679
And he was too.
00:35:43.840 --> 00:35:44.880
He was very kind.
00:35:45.280 --> 00:35:46.480
He was very comical.
00:35:47.119 --> 00:35:52.159
But the most important trait that my dad had, in my opinion, was that he was a fighter.
00:35:52.559 --> 00:35:56.800
And he wasn't a box, he wasn't boxing or UFC or anything like that.
00:35:56.960 --> 00:35:59.119
He was just a flat-out fighter.
00:35:59.360 --> 00:36:01.760
And I say that because his life wasn't easy.
00:36:02.079 --> 00:36:04.800
My dad grew up in a tough household.
00:36:05.119 --> 00:36:07.599
My grandma and grandpa were great people.
00:36:07.760 --> 00:36:09.519
They loved us unconditionally.
00:36:09.679 --> 00:36:12.159
They provided for us as much as they possibly could.
00:36:12.320 --> 00:36:13.760
But they had their faults.
00:36:13.920 --> 00:36:14.960
They had their demons.
00:36:15.679 --> 00:36:17.039
They had their beast.
00:36:17.920 --> 00:36:19.280
And my daddy grew up in that.
00:36:19.360 --> 00:36:20.639
He grew up around that.
00:36:20.800 --> 00:36:22.480
And my daddy got married at an early age.
00:36:22.639 --> 00:36:24.480
He had a kid at an early age.
00:36:24.880 --> 00:36:27.119
And he his life came to him fast.
00:36:27.679 --> 00:36:33.840
And, you know, he owned his own little air conditioned business, Jordan Heating and Air.
00:36:34.000 --> 00:36:37.119
And he did that for a long time, worked for himself.
00:36:37.280 --> 00:36:40.239
But that ended up financially just couldn't keep us afloat.
00:36:40.320 --> 00:36:43.119
So he ended up losing his business, having to go get a job for somebody else.
00:36:43.280 --> 00:36:46.079
I guess next stop was Davis Heating Air in Spartanburg.
00:36:46.159 --> 00:36:47.599
And that's where he worked there.
00:36:48.079 --> 00:36:55.840
But then this house that him and my grandfather had built, him and granddaddy had built, Jimmy, not Pop, but Jimmy.
00:36:56.159 --> 00:36:57.920
They had built this house by hand.
00:36:58.320 --> 00:36:59.440
This cedar house.
00:36:59.599 --> 00:37:01.440
Him and my dad had built it.
00:37:01.920 --> 00:37:06.559
And got to a point financially where we couldn't keep it.
00:37:06.800 --> 00:37:07.599
We couldn't keep it.
00:37:07.760 --> 00:37:10.719
And that was one of the things I look back on the most.
00:37:11.119 --> 00:37:13.840
And I see it wasn't a failure.
00:37:14.559 --> 00:37:16.400
It was an obstacle, no doubt.
00:37:16.719 --> 00:37:20.880
We lost that house, something that they had put all their blood, sweat, and tears in.
00:37:22.320 --> 00:37:27.599
We had a great place to start, and we just couldn't keep it.
00:37:27.840 --> 00:37:29.440
We just couldn't afford it.
00:37:29.760 --> 00:37:36.559
And as much as that hurt, as much as it hurt them, it didn't stop us from being a family.
00:37:37.920 --> 00:37:39.760
It didn't stop us from being a family.
00:37:39.840 --> 00:37:44.320
And it didn't stop us from living our life the best we possibly can.
00:37:44.480 --> 00:37:45.599
I mean, I was a trailer guy.
00:37:45.679 --> 00:37:47.360
I grew up in a trailer most of my life.
00:37:47.599 --> 00:37:49.599
As a kid, we grew up in a trailer.
00:37:49.920 --> 00:37:51.840
We moved to another trailer.
00:37:52.559 --> 00:37:54.239
Then we moved to a mealhouse.
00:37:54.320 --> 00:37:55.360
And I'm okay with that.
00:37:55.519 --> 00:37:58.320
That's why when people talk about trailers, they don't faze me.
00:37:58.559 --> 00:38:00.719
I mean, I've lived in them.
00:38:01.039 --> 00:38:02.719
But my trailer was full of love.
00:38:02.880 --> 00:38:05.119
My trailer was full of parents that cared about us.
00:38:05.360 --> 00:38:08.480
My trailer was full of two parents that wanted us to be successful.
00:38:08.639 --> 00:38:12.159
My trailer trailer was full of two people that wanted us to be better than they were.
00:38:12.719 --> 00:38:18.719
And so I don't ever, you know, say anything about that kind of stuff because I was there.
00:38:18.960 --> 00:38:19.519
I was there.
00:38:19.599 --> 00:38:23.280
I was at rock bottom as a I was with my family when we were at rock bottom.
00:38:23.440 --> 00:38:24.639
We didn't have anything.
00:38:24.800 --> 00:38:27.679
Barely putting food on the table, barely putting clothes on our bags.
00:38:27.840 --> 00:38:29.280
But they provided that.
00:38:29.440 --> 00:38:32.320
And they continued to do that even when we didn't have it.
00:38:32.639 --> 00:38:36.159
We didn't go without because my parents wouldn't let that happen.
00:38:36.320 --> 00:38:39.440
They went without way before we went without.
00:38:41.599 --> 00:38:47.440
And so those early failures of losing the house, of losing his business, the stroke came.
00:38:48.239 --> 00:38:51.760
And I mean, if you know anything about strokes, they can really mess you up.
00:38:51.920 --> 00:38:54.400
It ruined the pretty much the whole right side of his body.
00:38:54.639 --> 00:38:57.519
And uh, you know, he was able to fight through rehab at Roger C.
00:38:57.679 --> 00:39:06.559
Peace and get back to where he was functioning 65, 75% on his right side, which is a pretty good comeback for what he went through.
00:39:06.880 --> 00:39:17.440
And he was able to live a normal, well, I say a semi-normal life, where he was walking with a cane or walking with a walker, and he could make his own sandwiches and get his own drinks and get up and go back and forth to the bathroom.
00:39:17.599 --> 00:39:20.079
He could do all those things after his stroke.
00:39:20.320 --> 00:39:22.480
So the rehab really helped him through that.
00:39:22.559 --> 00:39:29.760
And that stroke, and we're going to talk about that stroke here in a second, and how it impacted our life from that point forward.
00:39:30.000 --> 00:39:33.360
The rehab, and then he he ended up being diagnosed with cancer.
00:39:33.519 --> 00:39:37.440
He had total reconstructive surgery of his mouth at one point because of cancer in his mouth.
00:39:37.599 --> 00:39:43.679
My niece actually had the same exact cancer in her mouth, and she had to have the same exact surgery.
00:39:44.079 --> 00:39:50.639
And it's just that's eventually what killed my father was cancer.
00:39:50.800 --> 00:39:53.679
He had he ended up getting lung cancer at some point.
00:39:53.920 --> 00:39:55.199
We knew he had it.
00:39:55.440 --> 00:40:06.400
He didn't want to go through any more of the chemo or anything like that, especially the stage of life he was, the stroke, all the stuff that happened with the stroke.
00:40:06.480 --> 00:40:07.920
And he had just he was ready.
00:40:08.000 --> 00:40:14.880
He was just ready to live his life and enjoy his grandkids and enjoy his kids and enjoy his wife and just live his life.
00:40:14.960 --> 00:40:16.320
He didn't want to go through any more things.
00:40:16.639 --> 00:40:18.159
And I understand that, but he fought.
00:40:18.320 --> 00:40:20.800
He fought all that for a long time.
00:40:21.280 --> 00:40:24.719
And so the fighter is what I remember the most.
00:40:25.440 --> 00:40:28.079
And we go to this stroke, and I'll never forget this.
00:40:28.159 --> 00:40:30.719
I had just become the head wrestling coach at West Oak.
00:40:31.039 --> 00:40:32.480
And I don't remember the year.
00:40:32.559 --> 00:40:36.559
I want to say 04, 05, something like that.
00:40:36.800 --> 00:40:38.400
I'm down here in Westminster.
00:40:38.480 --> 00:40:40.000
We had just coached a match.
00:40:40.320 --> 00:40:43.920
Daddy had we had just gotten done with our wedding.
00:40:44.559 --> 00:40:46.960
Me and Christy had just gotten married.
00:40:47.280 --> 00:40:49.840
Daddy had gone into rehab at some point.
00:40:50.800 --> 00:40:59.039
And he was at Faith Home in Greenwood doing rehab.
00:40:59.280 --> 00:41:02.400
We had dropped him off, and he was just being his silly self.
00:41:02.639 --> 00:41:06.960
You know, I remember dropping him off with mama, and he had alcohol in his cup.
00:41:07.119 --> 00:41:10.159
He was drinking as he was being put into rehab.
00:41:10.239 --> 00:41:12.480
That's kind of like his last two rah, I guess.
00:41:12.800 --> 00:41:20.719
He went into rehab and he went through, we were going through withdrawals and that kind of stuff, and we get a phone call, or at least Mama got a phone call saying that he had had a stroke.
00:41:20.960 --> 00:41:28.800
Took him to Greenwood, the hospital, the hospital at Greenwood, and he was there, and Mama talked to him, and he sounded like he was okay.
00:41:29.039 --> 00:41:33.039
Well, later on that night, he had another stroke.
00:41:33.360 --> 00:41:37.920
And when he had that second stroke, that's when all the damage was actually done.
00:41:38.239 --> 00:41:46.000
And so from that point forward, my daddy lived his life as a stroke victim.
00:41:46.079 --> 00:41:47.920
He lived his life with a disability.
00:41:48.000 --> 00:41:48.639
It's that simple.
00:41:48.719 --> 00:41:49.760
He had a disability.
00:41:49.920 --> 00:42:00.960
But what it allowed is for him to not have the option to drink anymore, to not have the option to do drugs anymore, to not have the option to drink alcohol, drink beer.
00:42:01.119 --> 00:42:06.079
He didn't have that choice because now we had to help him do day-to-day tasks.
00:42:06.239 --> 00:42:08.480
So if he wanted beer, we had to go get it for him.
00:42:08.719 --> 00:42:10.639
If he wanted liquor, we had to go get it for him.
00:42:10.800 --> 00:42:12.320
And that wasn't going to happen.
00:42:12.559 --> 00:42:20.639
So what we had from that stroke forward was an opportunity to see a dad that we had seen numerous times as a kid when he'd come off this alcohol.
00:42:20.800 --> 00:42:22.880
We got to see that for the remainder of his life.
00:42:23.119 --> 00:42:30.239
We got to see a dad who was quiet, mild-mannered, well-tempered, loved his kids, loved his grandkids.
00:42:30.400 --> 00:42:31.760
We got to see that.
00:42:32.000 --> 00:42:36.639
We got to see that on a daily basis after his stroke.
00:42:36.880 --> 00:42:43.920
And not many people had the ability to say, I've seen someone with addiction come out of that addiction.
00:42:44.320 --> 00:42:46.000
Not many people can say that.
00:42:53.119 --> 00:42:55.199
Majority of them go right back to where they came from.
00:42:55.440 --> 00:42:58.079
Majority of them fall right back into that addiction.
00:42:58.400 --> 00:43:07.280
And the ones that have a chance, the families that have a chance to see that redemption, it's something special.
00:43:07.519 --> 00:43:09.119
It's something special.
00:43:12.800 --> 00:43:15.920
No doubt when you witness something like that.
00:43:16.159 --> 00:43:21.840
When you witness something that life-changing, that someone goes from dark to light.
00:43:22.320 --> 00:43:26.239
When my daddy had that stroke, might not have been his choice.
00:43:28.079 --> 00:43:30.000
But it brought him from dark to light.
00:43:30.320 --> 00:43:33.039
And it blessed our families so much from that point.
00:43:34.079 --> 00:43:34.719
So much.
00:43:35.360 --> 00:43:40.320
Gave us so much time back that we had missed when he was on those drugs and alcohol.
00:43:40.639 --> 00:43:41.840
And it's that simple.
00:43:42.320 --> 00:43:47.599
So going back to my life, I looked through everything.
00:43:47.760 --> 00:43:50.559
I had the opportunity to become a football coach and a wrestling coach.
00:43:50.639 --> 00:43:55.280
And one of the things I talked about consistently as a coach is be relentless.
00:43:55.519 --> 00:43:56.320
Be relentless.
00:43:56.559 --> 00:43:57.280
Be relentless.
00:43:57.440 --> 00:43:58.239
Never give up.
00:43:58.400 --> 00:43:58.960
Never stop.
00:43:59.119 --> 00:43:59.840
Never stop persistent.
00:44:00.079 --> 00:44:00.880
Pursuing your dreams.
00:44:01.039 --> 00:44:03.280
Never stop pursuing to get better.
00:44:03.599 --> 00:44:06.079
Be relentless in everything you do.
00:44:06.320 --> 00:44:10.400
Put so much pressure on your opponent that they don't have a choice but to break.
00:44:10.559 --> 00:44:12.559
That's how I coach my kids in wrestling.
00:44:12.719 --> 00:44:14.800
That's how I coach my kids in football.
00:44:14.960 --> 00:44:18.320
You don't have to stand there and let them do what they want to do to you.
00:44:18.559 --> 00:44:21.440
You take it to them and make them respond.
00:44:21.840 --> 00:44:23.519
It's what we used to tell our kids.
00:44:23.679 --> 00:44:30.239
My linebackers, they knew if they hit that running back hard the first couple of plays of the game, he wouldn't run as hard as a game winner.
00:44:30.800 --> 00:44:32.719
So we taught them to be physical.
00:44:32.960 --> 00:44:33.760
We taught them that.
00:44:33.840 --> 00:44:35.199
We taught them to be relentless.
00:44:35.360 --> 00:44:37.599
No matter what happens, get up and go again.
00:44:37.760 --> 00:44:42.400
So we taught them that put your head down mentality, that relentless mentality.
00:44:43.280 --> 00:44:49.360
But one of the things about my dad was, and the term that comes to my mind when I really want to describe my dad as relentless.
00:44:49.599 --> 00:44:51.119
He was relentless.
00:44:51.519 --> 00:44:53.199
Him, no, not so much.
00:44:53.360 --> 00:44:56.400
He was laid back, cool as a cucumber type dad.
00:44:56.559 --> 00:44:57.280
That's what he was.
00:44:57.360 --> 00:44:59.519
He was laid back, cool as a cucumber.
00:44:59.679 --> 00:45:04.639
But relentless comes to my mind about my father for one specific reason.
00:45:05.360 --> 00:45:11.119
Because the good Lord was relentless in his pursuit of my death.
00:45:11.519 --> 00:45:12.400
Relentless.
00:45:12.639 --> 00:45:24.239
Never gave up on him, never turned his back on him, never let him go, kept his hand on him the entire time, and constantly pursued my death.
00:45:24.400 --> 00:45:25.920
My dad was a runner.
00:45:26.880 --> 00:45:28.800
Not like an actual runner.
00:45:28.880 --> 00:45:32.000
He wasn't out there in bike shorts, running up and down the road, stuff like that.
00:45:32.159 --> 00:45:34.320
But he ran from God for years.
00:45:34.719 --> 00:45:41.599
He ran from God and he ran to alcohol, he ran to drugs, majority of my life.
00:45:42.159 --> 00:45:45.039
And finally the good Lord said, you know what, I've had enough.
00:45:45.599 --> 00:45:56.000
I've pursued you, I've chased you, I've pulled you in a few times, and then you left me again, and I pursued you relentlessly.
00:45:56.480 --> 00:45:59.920
In my opinion, the Lord just chased him.
00:46:00.320 --> 00:46:02.639
Chased him and pursued him.
00:46:06.000 --> 00:46:07.920
And finally locked on to him.
00:46:08.079 --> 00:46:10.960
And the way it had to happen was my dad had to have a stroke.
00:46:11.199 --> 00:46:13.760
Because my dad couldn't make that decision by himself.
00:46:14.000 --> 00:46:17.199
My dad wasn't strong enough to beat that addiction by itself.
00:46:18.159 --> 00:46:30.239
It took somebody intervening and a circumstance intervening for him to be able to beat something that for him to be able to slay the beast that it controlled his life forever.
00:46:32.400 --> 00:46:37.119
That's one of the things that I am so, so proud of my death for.
00:46:40.000 --> 00:46:41.199
The philosophy was simple.
00:46:41.280 --> 00:46:44.079
You can run, but you can't hide.
00:46:53.920 --> 00:46:57.039
And when I do, you're not going to have a choice anymore.
00:46:57.760 --> 00:46:59.119
You're not going to have a choice.
00:46:59.280 --> 00:47:04.800
And I truly believe that that's the prayer my mama prays on a daily basis.
00:47:05.119 --> 00:47:05.679
I do.
00:47:05.840 --> 00:47:09.599
Because my mama, I guarantee you, she's got knee problems today.
00:47:09.679 --> 00:47:11.440
She's having some knee issues recently.
00:47:11.519 --> 00:47:14.800
And it's because she spends a lot of time on her knees in prayer.
00:47:15.039 --> 00:47:16.400
I'm telling you.
00:47:16.880 --> 00:47:28.079
I love my mama more than anything in this world, and she is a praying woman, and I know for all the years she was married, she prayed for my daddy every single day.
00:47:28.400 --> 00:47:30.000
And the good Lord heard it.
00:47:30.320 --> 00:47:31.519
The good Lord heard it.
00:47:31.840 --> 00:47:34.639
He knew her heart.
00:47:35.199 --> 00:47:41.599
And he knew her prayers because she told him every single day.
00:47:43.760 --> 00:47:45.679
She never asked the good Lord to give my daddy his truth.
00:47:45.760 --> 00:47:46.559
That's not what I'm saying.
00:47:46.719 --> 00:47:47.920
So don't think that.
00:47:48.159 --> 00:47:53.039
But I guarantee you that she prayed every day to change my dad's heart.
00:47:53.280 --> 00:47:56.559
She prayed every day to take that addiction away from my father.
00:47:56.800 --> 00:48:02.880
She prayed every day to give my daddy the opportunity to be somebody different.
00:48:03.519 --> 00:48:05.679
And man, I tell you what.
00:48:06.239 --> 00:48:10.800
When it happened, a lot of sadness because you didn't know what was going to happen after that stroke.
00:48:10.880 --> 00:48:12.000
We didn't know what was going to happen.
00:48:12.079 --> 00:48:13.760
What kind of recovery we were going to have.
00:48:14.320 --> 00:48:15.679
We had no clue.
00:48:15.920 --> 00:48:24.000
But thank God, we never had any major, major lasting effects.
00:48:24.239 --> 00:48:34.159
I mean, he had his disability and stuff like that, but you know, his speech was off a little bit, and his speech got worse when he had to have the reconstructive mouth surgery.
00:48:34.559 --> 00:48:37.760
And but we still got to have our debt.
00:48:38.000 --> 00:48:39.199
We got to have it.
00:48:39.440 --> 00:48:54.800
And I truly believe that that relentless love and that relentless pursuit that the good Lord did towards my dead, and I truly believe that that pursuit was taking place because my mom was praying about that constantly when it came to my father.
00:48:55.360 --> 00:49:09.679
That I truly believe those two things is what changed his life and what ended up changing my life, my sister's life, my niece's life, my kids' lives, all these people.
00:49:10.079 --> 00:49:13.679
And that's just something that I'm gonna be honest with you, man.
00:49:13.760 --> 00:49:14.719
I'm proud of that.
00:49:14.800 --> 00:49:15.679
I'm proud of my dad.
00:49:15.840 --> 00:49:17.280
I have pride for him.
00:49:17.519 --> 00:49:19.760
I have pride in what my daddy did.
00:49:20.000 --> 00:49:23.920
I had pride that he fought through all that adversity.
00:49:24.079 --> 00:49:26.480
I have pride that he beat addiction.
00:49:26.719 --> 00:49:32.480
Even if it wasn't all his decision, even if the good Lord had to intervene to help him do it, it still happened.
00:49:32.719 --> 00:49:33.840
He beat it.
00:49:35.440 --> 00:49:36.960
I'm proud of my dad.
00:49:37.119 --> 00:49:37.760
I really am.
00:49:37.920 --> 00:49:42.639
I mean, I look back on my life and I'm sure I wasn't an easy child to deal with.
00:49:42.800 --> 00:49:45.280
I know my sister definitely wasn't an easy child to deal with.
00:49:45.360 --> 00:49:47.360
I love you, just so you know that.
00:49:47.840 --> 00:49:52.480
But my dad pushed through it.
00:49:52.719 --> 00:49:56.000
My dad beat addiction numerous times, but he fell back into that trap.
00:49:56.079 --> 00:50:01.679
And that's the repetitive things that take place a lot of times when you're dealing with somebody who has addiction.
00:50:02.079 --> 00:50:04.719
And it's sad, but it's true.
00:50:05.039 --> 00:50:06.559
Addiction's never ending.
00:50:06.719 --> 00:50:27.199
It's a daily battle that you have to wake up and you have to win that battle, whether it's pornography, whether it's alcohol, whether it's drugs, whether it's work, whether it's infidelity, whether it's whatever that is, you have to win that battle every single day because it don't go away.
00:50:27.599 --> 00:50:40.000
And that's something I've had to see as an adult looking back over my life and the things that I've done, and the things my dad did, and the things that people around me have done, the people that come clean and then get back on it again.
00:50:40.079 --> 00:50:48.960
And it's all because one thing happens that puts them back on that path they were on before because that's what they're used to.
00:50:49.199 --> 00:50:50.880
That's what feels normal.
00:50:51.599 --> 00:50:54.719
That's what their body's accustomed to.
00:50:55.360 --> 00:50:58.800
You go through a breakup, alcohol makes me feel good.
00:50:58.880 --> 00:51:00.639
I'm gonna drink alcohol.
00:51:01.119 --> 00:51:06.400
You go through a death in the family, alcohol makes me forget about it.
00:51:06.559 --> 00:51:09.920
So you go back to alcohol because that's what you know.
00:51:10.079 --> 00:51:13.519
And it changes the way you think, it changes the way you feel.
00:51:13.760 --> 00:51:21.360
So when you're dealing with somebody in these situations, what I've had to learn as I've gotten older is they've got to win that battle daily.
00:51:21.519 --> 00:51:23.760
Addiction's not here today, gone tomorrow.
00:51:23.920 --> 00:51:44.400
Addiction's here today, defeated tomorrow, defeated Tuesday, defeated Wednesday, defeated Thursday, defeated Friday, defeated Saturday, defeated Sunday, and then when you get to Sunday, you've got to go back and defeat it again on Monday, and you got a 40-hour work week of defending and defeating that addiction.
00:51:44.800 --> 00:51:47.280
It's not something you do easily.
00:51:47.440 --> 00:51:50.320
It's not a one-time defeat and you're done.
00:51:50.639 --> 00:51:53.039
It's a constant battle that you have to live.
00:51:53.119 --> 00:52:02.400
It's a beast that lives inside of you and it stays inside of you, and all you can do is beat that beast on a daily basis.
00:52:02.639 --> 00:52:03.679
That's it.
00:52:03.920 --> 00:52:05.360
And you can't do it by yourself.
00:52:05.519 --> 00:52:06.800
I witnessed that.
00:52:07.360 --> 00:52:08.559
Yeah, I witnessed that.
00:52:08.719 --> 00:52:14.079
If you're an addict or if you have an addiction of some sort, you're not going to be able to beat that by yourself.
00:52:14.239 --> 00:52:22.079
You have to have support from family, and truly, you have to have support from the good Lord because He's the one that's going to give you the strength to beat that addiction.
00:52:22.400 --> 00:52:25.519
He's the only one that can give you the strength to beat that addiction.
00:52:26.079 --> 00:52:28.320
And I witnessed it.
00:52:28.639 --> 00:52:29.599
I witnessed it.
00:52:29.840 --> 00:52:36.159
My mom's prayers and the good Lord's relentless pursuit of my father is what changed his life.
00:52:36.480 --> 00:52:37.360
Period.
00:52:37.679 --> 00:52:39.119
And I truly believe that.
00:52:39.280 --> 00:52:42.159
Some people don't believe in God, those kind of things.
00:52:42.400 --> 00:52:44.880
I mean, that's that's for you to believe.
00:52:44.960 --> 00:52:55.840
But for me, and witnessing that story and that situation that I grew up in, and I saw the drastic change, and I saw that beast be destroyed forever.
00:52:56.559 --> 00:52:59.119
That beast was destroyed.
00:53:00.639 --> 00:53:04.159
And my dad was sober for the rest of his life.
00:53:04.559 --> 00:53:05.360
Period.
00:53:07.519 --> 00:53:11.039
And there's so many people that never get to witness that.
00:53:11.920 --> 00:53:13.119
Never get to witness that.
00:53:13.280 --> 00:53:22.079
Most people who grow up in families that have addicts as fathers or or have addiction in their family, most of those people see tragic endings to those stories.
00:53:22.239 --> 00:53:33.840
Whether it's a DUI, whether it's a dying in a car accident, whether it's some kind of liver, whatever, you know, some kind of liver poisoning or something happens.
00:53:34.000 --> 00:53:39.599
Somebody takes their own life, or something tragic usually happens in those situations.
00:53:39.840 --> 00:53:42.000
But for me, I got to see redemption.
00:53:42.239 --> 00:53:45.679
And I am going to stand here and tell you today that redemption is real.
00:53:46.000 --> 00:53:50.480
You can be what you want to be, but you can't do it by yourself.
00:53:50.719 --> 00:53:51.599
It's real.
00:53:51.760 --> 00:53:53.519
It happens on a daily basis.
00:53:53.760 --> 00:53:57.360
Numerous people have experienced redemption.
00:53:58.639 --> 00:53:59.519
And I'm one of them.
00:53:59.599 --> 00:54:00.159
I've watched it.
00:54:00.239 --> 00:54:03.360
I've watched the whole story transform in front of myself.
00:54:03.599 --> 00:54:08.880
But like I said, you have to be able to defeat that beast daily.
00:54:09.119 --> 00:54:09.599
Daily.
00:54:09.760 --> 00:54:16.960
It's a day by day, hour by hour, minute by minute battle that you have to win daily.
00:54:17.760 --> 00:54:37.039
And I have so much respect and so much love for those people that battle that addiction on a daily basis, and they go out and they attack it, and they do everything they possibly can do to make sure they stay sober from that point forward.
00:54:38.320 --> 00:54:41.280
Because tomorrow could be a bad day.
00:54:41.519 --> 00:54:42.880
And you want to get away.
00:54:43.039 --> 00:54:44.239
You want to escape.
00:54:44.400 --> 00:54:50.639
And the only way to escape is to take that pill, take that drink of liquor, take that beer.
00:54:50.880 --> 00:54:53.840
That's the only way to escape because it changes the way you think.
00:54:54.960 --> 00:54:59.760
The people that are successful in beating addiction, defeat that beast daily.
00:55:00.800 --> 00:55:02.320
Defeat that beast daily.
00:55:02.719 --> 00:55:10.480
Greg Whitfield, who I've become very good friends with, is the owner of Giant Slayer Ministries, which is the nonprofit here in Seneca, South Carolina.
00:55:11.039 --> 00:55:22.400
Their focus is helping recovering alcoholics, recovering drug addicts defeat that addiction.
00:55:23.280 --> 00:55:24.719
That's what they do.
00:55:24.960 --> 00:55:25.840
Because he's got a story.
00:55:25.920 --> 00:55:27.519
He's recovering alcoholic itself.
00:55:28.639 --> 00:55:35.679
And he was one of those that defeated that beast, and he still defeats that beast every single day.
00:55:36.000 --> 00:55:45.039
Greg is a true friend of mine, somebody who I love and somebody I care about, and somebody who knows that I have, that he has my full support at all times.
00:55:45.119 --> 00:55:50.159
And that anything he needs from Chalk's barbecue, if I can provide, he will have it.
00:55:50.400 --> 00:55:52.239
Because I care about his mission.
00:55:52.480 --> 00:55:58.800
I care about his vision so much because of the way I was raised and what I got to do.
00:55:58.960 --> 00:56:01.119
Addiction doesn't have to define you.
00:56:01.280 --> 00:56:03.119
And Greg's going to tell you that.
00:56:03.840 --> 00:56:04.960
Listen to me again.
00:56:05.280 --> 00:56:09.280
Addiction does not have to define you.
00:56:10.880 --> 00:56:15.039
You just have to wake up daily and defeat that beast.
00:56:15.679 --> 00:56:19.840
Every day, every hour, every minute.
00:56:20.960 --> 00:56:24.960
In our memories today, we're going to talk about our banging baked beans.
00:56:25.280 --> 00:56:34.719
When I was growing up, my dad made these beans for us around campfires, the campgrounds while we were fishing, in the woods while we were hunting.
00:56:35.440 --> 00:56:40.159
And they're what you have today at Chocks Barbecue, our banging baked beans.
00:56:40.719 --> 00:56:49.440
Growing up, sometimes at these campfires, you'd want to do a one-pot meal to where you had something hardy that you could eat quick and then get back to doing what you were doing.
00:56:49.519 --> 00:56:52.320
So Ded would always make these beans for us on these trips.
00:56:52.559 --> 00:56:56.000
We would take just a canned baked bean, whatever brand that you like.
00:56:56.079 --> 00:56:57.599
We use a Bush's original.
00:56:57.760 --> 00:57:00.079
We just feel like it's a better quality bean.
00:57:00.320 --> 00:57:04.960
And we take that and then we add in our own twist to what goes in there.
00:57:05.039 --> 00:57:06.800
So we take hamburger meat.
00:57:07.039 --> 00:57:12.000
Sometimes we take pulled pork depending on what we have available.
00:57:12.480 --> 00:57:14.719
We also will use sometimes pepperoni.
00:57:15.199 --> 00:57:16.639
We always use little smokies.
00:57:16.800 --> 00:57:18.719
We dice those up real small.
00:57:18.960 --> 00:57:19.679
Put those in there.
00:57:19.760 --> 00:57:21.039
It's a smoked sausage.
00:57:21.199 --> 00:57:23.280
We cut up tomato uh tomatoes.
00:57:23.440 --> 00:57:26.400
We cut up bell peppers and onions.
00:57:27.119 --> 00:57:36.000
We also, like I said, dice up those little smokies and we brown the hamburger meat and we add those into the beans.
00:57:36.079 --> 00:57:40.480
We'll cook the we'll cook the peppers and cook the onions also with the ground beef.
00:57:40.719 --> 00:57:45.119
And that gives them, that way they're already cooked, they're not, you know, crispy or hard or anything like that.
00:57:45.199 --> 00:57:46.880
So we mix those into the beans.
00:57:47.039 --> 00:57:49.199
Then we take our sweet barbecue sauce.
00:57:49.440 --> 00:57:54.159
We take that barbecue sauce and we put that in as a uh extra flavoring there.
00:57:54.239 --> 00:58:02.159
We add brown sugar, a little bit of Wiltshire Shire, a little bit of mustard, and then we mix that all in together to create a bang and baked bean.
00:58:02.400 --> 00:58:10.079
We put this in a pan, we bake it off in the oven until it gets nice and thick, and then when it's thick, it's ready to serve.
00:58:10.239 --> 00:58:12.559
And that's how we make our bang and baked beans.
00:58:12.719 --> 00:58:22.400
Check out our YouTube channel, Chocks BBQ, to come get that smoke in the kitchen show, and check out how we do it.
00:58:26.960 --> 00:58:29.519
I'm so thankful you have to come along together.
00:58:29.760 --> 00:58:30.639
Welcome to the story.