Now That's What I Call Parenting Hell - Volume 6

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Hello, I'm Rob Beckett.
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And I'm Josh Willicombe.
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Welcome to Parenting Hell, the show in which Josh and
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I discuss what it's really like to be a parent.
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Which I would say can be a little tricky.
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So, to make ourselves, and hopefully you, feel better about
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the trials and tribulations of modern day parenting, each week,
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We'll be chatting to a famous parent about how they're coping.
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Or hopefully how they're not coping.
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And we'll also be hearing from you, the listener, with
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your tips, advice and, of course, tales of parenting woe.
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Because, let's be honest, there are plenty of times when
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none of us know what we're doing. Hello, you're listening
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to Now That's What I Call Parenting Hell, Volume 6.
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Hello, Tom Parry.
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Hey, dudes. How you doing?
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Good.
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How are you?
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Well, am I the newest parent you've had on?
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I'm six weeks into being a parent. Oh, yes, you are. Yeah,
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so here I am.
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Yeah, so I haven't... I've got to admit, I haven't
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listened to the podcast because I have just become a parent,
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so it didn't apply to me until now.
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So, yeah, I've just come off my.
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I'm on a night shift at the moment, so I've
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got a six-week-old daughter.
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I had her till five.
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And then I woke up about half an hour ago,
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so it feels like it's 8 o'clock in the morning
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for me.
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Right.
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Right now.
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So what are you doing in the early hours of
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the morning for those night films?
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I did the Tom Hanks Da Vinci Code trilogy. Absolutely
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scraping the barrel.
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The first, I don't know.
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I don't know if you guys are the same.
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But when my daughter's called Gloria, when she first came along,
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I was like, I'm going to watch all the best
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films with you.
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I'm going to talk you through all the best films.
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It's going to be like rediscovering cinema. So I sat
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for the first week watching my favourite films. But by now,
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I've just run out of films to show her. So
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it's just any old shit. We'll stick any old shit on.
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So what's Gloria doing when you're watching these films?
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She wakes up. She sleeps really well on someone at
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the moment. And it's like.
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And it's like, we can put her in this, we've
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got this beside me cot and we can put her
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in that, but we get less, like Jane gets less
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sleep because.
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She's, you know, she's up and down.
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So instead, like I get a bit, I get three
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hours kip in the evening and then I kind of
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get into this like night shift.
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And then, like, every three or four hours, I take
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her up for a feed and come back down.
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Yeah.
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But I am absolutely loving it. I feel like a
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student again, because it's like, I'm staying up all night.
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You can eat whatever you like. I watched, it's like
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four o'clock in the morning, and you're like, I'm going
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to bang on a Kevin Costner film. You just think, oh,
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I haven't done this.
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I haven't done this since university. Oh, absolutely loving it.
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Right, let's be clear. What hours are you keeping? I
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want to know your shift pattern.
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Like about half ten, eleven till five. That's kind of
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the shift on. So I get three hours before that.
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I go to bed at about seven, get as much
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sleep as I can.
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In the evening.
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Then I get up at about ten, then I'm on
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the night shift. I try and get through till five.
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LAUGHTER I'm so sleep deprived I feel like I'm on
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drugs I feel like I feel like it's the final
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day of Glastonbury it's just like every day every day
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it's got like this gentle hum to it where I
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feel like I'm like slightly buzzing off my face because
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I just haven't had any sleep it's amazing.
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And then the other thing I do is I watch
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BT Sports.
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I really want to work on a show that's like
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New Dad Sport Report because.
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I end up watching.
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The.
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Other day I cried at an Australian Rules football game.
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I didn't know who was playing.
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LAUGHTER I didn't know who was playing, but it was
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just like, I don't know the rules of the game.
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It was like, there was like a last minute win
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and it was just like, oh wow, the magic of
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sport glow.
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Gloria, this is what live sport's all about. But it's
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just like, I didn't have a fucking clue what was
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going on.
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It's amazing. When she sleeps, she's just fast asleep and
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I just talk to her. I don't know if you
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remember the early days. How old are yours now?
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Five and three.
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She's three.
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You're through this bit, aren't you?
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Tom, this isn't a normal thing that all parents go through.
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We're not all sat up watching Fast and Furious till 5am.
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There's a critical phase where I've got one of those
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donut pillows.
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Well, Jane has.
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It's one of Jane's donut pillows. There's been several occasions
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now where Gloria... Because, like, I've got, like... I'm always
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a bit overweight, but I've put on a lot of weight.
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How about? I haven't weighed it, but... I'll tell you what.
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I'll tell you this how much, right? I had to
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do a day's.
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Filming the other day, and it was supposed to be
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filming in February.
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And I'd given my costume measurements.
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And I went in and they said, so you said
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you were 36 waist?
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And I said, yeah, but I think I'm probably 38 now.
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So they gave me 38 and I didn't fit 38.
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I've been proper daddy.
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So I.
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Put on weight and now, glory out, there's nothing worse
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than when your baby daughter stirs on you. I've got
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enough breasts for her to think that there's milk in there.
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So the other night, she promptly started trying to have
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a go at my nipple because she figured there might
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be some milk in there.
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Was there any milk in there? Did she strike gold?
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Well, skin on skin is very important, Josh. They preach that.
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I don't know if it was that back in your day,
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but skin on skin is essential for bonding, not just
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for the mother, but also for the father. That's what
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they say. Yeah.
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There's got to be a cut-off date. There's got to
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be a cut-off date, though, isn't there?
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Yeah, I don't know when. I'm not going to pick
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her up from school, topless.
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I'll drive you home because you're waiting to do your
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driving lesson.
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He's at the house.
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When she graduates, when she graduates, I'll have the old
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top around the head.
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Exactly.
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You need it just to get your head in the
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game for A-levels. You know, it's good for your development.
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Piggybacking it to school, skin on skin. But yeah, so
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like I'm holding her. I hold her in like a
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cradle type setup.
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But then there's a critical stage where I let go
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of her and put her onto the donut pillow that's
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around me so that I can have both hands free.
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And that's like the pivotal, because if she doesn't wake
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when I do that, then I know I'm in for
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a good three hours.
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A good three hours just to yourself at night, on
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your own in a way. I'm starting to get slightly
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jealous of your routine.
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Oh, I've got like a routine. That's the thing you crave.
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As long as you've got some kind of system. then
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you can kind of get through. You know, it doesn't
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feel like chaos. So, like, I have two flasks.
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I have one for my.
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I have a flask for my right hand and a
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flask for my left, just in case.
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How much.
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You sound like one of them, like, 50 Stone Men.
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They don't move and just... They've got that.
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Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's how I feel.
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I have a flask for the left hand, flask for
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the right, in case I.
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It depends on what side I've got.
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So, what's in the flask?
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That's water.
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And then I've got a thermos pint mug of coffee.
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Thermos pipe mug of coffee.
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That stays warm for a good hour and a half.
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That's in front of me. Two satsumas and a biscuit. Right?
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Two satsumas and a biscuit, and that's me then set up.
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Carrot pie and a milk.
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I can get till five o'clock on that.
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It's only when I know she's entered into deep sleep,
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like when both of her hands have come up by
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the side of her head. When she gets into deep sleep,
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both her arms come up like she's celebrating. That's when
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you know she's deep sleeping. That's when I can go
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for the crinkly wrapper.
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There was a stage where when mine was so small
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that I could cradle her in my arm still and
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play FIFA. I could get the controller in my hand
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while still holding her. And that was a great moment.
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But then when she got a bit too big for that,
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it was terrible. But that was a great couple of weeks.
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And you have to temper your celebrations, I bet.
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Yeah.
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So do you worry that what it's going to be
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like when you go back to, because presumably you're going to,
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everything's going to open up soon. And so you're going
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to be away again. Do you think you'll look back
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on this as a kind of a real period of
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bonding with your children?
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Yeah, we've definitely, I think in all seriousness, I think
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sometimes we, you know, we're never going to get this
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time back and we've been able to spend time together
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that we wouldn't have had otherwise. So like one thing
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I realized was that sometimes I've been so busy, I've
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not looked in their eyes. And so sometimes I just
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hold it. Like I genuinely, if you think about how
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busy we can get sometimes, how often do we just
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hold their faces and just look at their eyes?
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I do.
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I do.
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I do.
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Yeah. He hates it, but I love it.
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And Nadia, you've got like the, the thing I remember
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most about like the first time you rose to fame
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is you've got the most kind of your eyes really
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like look at people. Do you know what I mean?
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Your eyes really stand out. So the idea of, you
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holding your 14-year-old's face and just staring into their eyes.
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Yeah.
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It's an arresting image, Nadia.
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It is, but I also threaten him with taking him
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out of the inheritance if he doesn't look back. It's like,
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I will cut you out of.
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The inheritance, look me in the eyes. And that usually works.
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Yeah.
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It must be like, of all the people we've spoken to,
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in your children's life, your life has changed so dramatically.
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in what you were doing before, I don't know what,
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how old your children would have been when you did
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bake off what was it six or seven years ago now.
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Yeah like it was they were my eldest was eight
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so really little.
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And has that effect like how have they adapted to
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that a lot of chill people who spoke to when
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they've had kids like their job their job and there's
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been the same throughout but did it change how you
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parented and stuff like that?
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Of course.
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I mean, our challenges became different, you know, going out,
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whether it's restaurants or just down the street, you know,
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when people recognize you. It's not as easy anymore because
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I think as they've gotten older, where it felt like
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fun at the beginning, my eldest has become quite protective.
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And he's, you know, he's bigger than I am.
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You know, he's bigger than me.
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If he doesn't like what I'm saying, you know, he just,
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grabs me around the waist, picks me up and takes
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00:10:46.429 --> 00:10:47.269
me back in the kitchen.
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He just picks me up.
255
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He doesn't say anything. He holds me around the waist,
256
00:10:57.159 --> 00:10:59.240
picks me up off the ground, takes me in the kitchen.
257
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I walks out, shuts the door and he's gone. And
258
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so it's, it's, it has changed as they've become older.
259
00:11:06.019 --> 00:11:09.159
It's definitely changed. Like they had this, my eldest had
260
00:11:09.200 --> 00:11:13.019
a task to talk about somebody that inspires them, somebody
261
00:11:13.080 --> 00:11:14.860
in the public eye that inspires them. And I said,
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00:11:14.919 --> 00:11:16.539
so you're going to be writing about me? He goes,
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don't be ridiculous. So for them, they couldn't care less.
264
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Like the boys do not care what I do. They
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don't want to be a part of it. They're not
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interested at all. The idea that I do this, it
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00:11:29.269 --> 00:11:32.850
makes no difference to them. But I remember really early
268
00:11:32.929 --> 00:11:36.169
on when they were having this in school when we'd
269
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just moved them. because we used to live in Leeds
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and we'd just moved them to, we'd moved them to
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their new school. And the teacher asked him, what, what
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00:11:43.679 --> 00:11:45.059
does your, what do your parents do? It was a
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question they were asking all the kids. And he didn't
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00:11:48.090 --> 00:11:51.429
know what to say. And I remember we always have
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this conversation. It's really funny because like so much has
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00:11:53.750 --> 00:11:55.330
changed in the last six years. And he was like,
277
00:11:55.750 --> 00:11:57.409
and he said, miss, can you come back to me?
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So he couldn't work out what I do because like,
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00:12:00.529 --> 00:12:04.830
I don't have holidays. It's just, it's a bit, It's freelance,
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00:12:04.889 --> 00:12:07.340
isn't it? So for him, he was like, I don't
281
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really know what she does. So he couldn't put a
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name to it. And then he just said, she follows
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her dreams. And I was like, oh, man.
284
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Oh, wow.
285
00:12:18.899 --> 00:12:21.769
Just throw that on a pillow, man. Just throw that
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on a pillow.
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Genuinely, when he said that, I was like, and that
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sticks with me. That stays with me forever. And ultimately,
289
00:12:27.629 --> 00:12:30.669
as parents, what we do doesn't really matter as long
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as they believe that we're following dreams. our dreams in
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00:12:34.169 --> 00:12:36.340
the hope that they'll follow theirs. And that's ultimately what
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I've always ever wanted. So the fact that I do
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00:12:38.879 --> 00:12:41.720
this job means nothing to the boys, but my little girl,
294
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can I say, she loves every second of it.
295
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Every second.
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When we would go out to town and people didn't
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recognize me. So we'd be walking past. And if people
298
00:12:55.110 --> 00:12:57.990
don't look at me or recognize, she watches, she watches
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00:12:58.009 --> 00:13:00.889
to see who looks, who twitches, who might turn back round.
300
00:13:01.350 --> 00:13:03.169
So she's out there watching, looking.
301
00:13:03.289 --> 00:13:04.230
She loves all of that.
302
00:13:04.870 --> 00:13:08.600
And one day we were walking past, nobody recognized me.
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I was like, great day, we can get on and
304
00:13:10.250 --> 00:13:13.659
get stuff done. And she, in the middle of the
305
00:13:13.700 --> 00:13:18.299
town center, turns around, walks up ahead of me, about
306
00:13:18.299 --> 00:13:21.259
10 yards, stands in front of me, turns around, hands
307
00:13:21.340 --> 00:13:22.279
on her mouth and says.
308
00:13:22.500 --> 00:13:23.220
Oh my gosh.
309
00:13:23.799 --> 00:13:29.700
Is that Nadia from the Bake Off? Everybody turns around. Oh,
310
00:13:29.730 --> 00:13:30.350
it's funny.
311
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And I'm stuck in town for an hour. signing things,
312
00:13:34.720 --> 00:13:37.720
taking selfies. And I was like, whilst I don't mind
313
00:13:37.799 --> 00:13:39.519
any of that, I try to stay away from it
314
00:13:39.559 --> 00:13:40.700
when I'm with my kids.
315
00:13:41.000 --> 00:13:41.919
She just stood there.
316
00:13:41.940 --> 00:13:44.100
And I bet the Bake Off crowd take ages to
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00:13:44.159 --> 00:13:48.750
take a selfie. Age demographic. They've got leather cases on
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00:13:48.789 --> 00:13:51.769
their phone. They've got their thumb over the camera. They're
319
00:13:51.889 --> 00:13:53.509
a bit doddery, some of them.
320
00:13:53.529 --> 00:13:57.710
It must be enough. Bad angles. Bad angles, yep. Unless
321
00:13:57.769 --> 00:13:59.460
it's Mary Berry. Never mind everyone else.
322
00:13:59.480 --> 00:14:03.120
LAUGHTER So what kind of stuff is she into? Is
323
00:14:03.139 --> 00:14:05.080
she watching a lot of Peppa Pig or CBeebies?
324
00:14:05.100 --> 00:14:08.259
Oh, a lot of Peppa Pig at the moment. Really?
325
00:14:08.320 --> 00:14:10.620
I mean, I am a big fan.
326
00:14:11.259 --> 00:14:12.610
Are either of you in it?
327
00:14:12.710 --> 00:14:14.850
Are either of you doing any kids' voices?
328
00:14:14.870 --> 00:14:18.690
No, I've never done one. But we interviewed Doc Brown
329
00:14:18.769 --> 00:14:21.629
and he'd done the... Is it Jack Norris? It's not
330
00:14:21.649 --> 00:14:21.909
Jack Norris.
331
00:14:21.929 --> 00:14:22.629
Bedtime Stories.
332
00:14:22.690 --> 00:14:23.370
It's the Bedtime Stories.
333
00:14:23.389 --> 00:14:23.909
Bedtime Stories.
334
00:14:24.429 --> 00:14:26.529
Yeah, which a lot of people want to do. Would
335
00:14:26.549 --> 00:14:27.970
you do any of them, Michael?
336
00:14:28.090 --> 00:14:29.129
Oh, yeah, absolutely.
337
00:14:29.210 --> 00:14:31.840
I could see you appearing in, you know, an episode
338
00:14:31.860 --> 00:14:34.460
of Justin's House getting pied in the face or something
339
00:14:34.500 --> 00:14:35.000
like that.
340
00:14:35.139 --> 00:14:37.659
I'd love to get pied by Justin. Well, I mean,
341
00:14:37.899 --> 00:14:39.580
what's the deal with Justin?
342
00:14:39.600 --> 00:14:45.570
Because he's... I mean, there's young CBeebies or something.
343
00:14:45.610 --> 00:14:50.009
What's that all about? Because he does Justin's House. They
344
00:14:50.029 --> 00:14:50.360
do Mr.
345
00:14:50.389 --> 00:14:50.700
Tumble.
346
00:14:50.889 --> 00:14:53.740
I think Mr. Tumble's the best one. I mean, that's great, Mr.
347
00:14:53.759 --> 00:14:54.059
Tumble.
348
00:14:54.100 --> 00:14:57.759
He does the game show where he plays all the characters.
349
00:14:58.240 --> 00:15:00.600
Is that the sketch show? Is that a far show
350
00:15:00.620 --> 00:15:03.039
for the kids? Yeah, that one. That one's one step
351
00:15:03.080 --> 00:15:05.039
too far, that is. He's jumped the shark.
352
00:15:05.200 --> 00:15:07.279
I've got a theory on that one. I reckon, you
353
00:15:07.320 --> 00:15:09.299
know when, like, someone's got a lot of power at
354
00:15:09.320 --> 00:15:12.100
a channel and he's gone, if I do another series
355
00:15:12.120 --> 00:15:14.639
of Mr. Tumble, you have to take that sketch show
356
00:15:14.659 --> 00:15:15.700
I've been pitching to you.
357
00:15:15.840 --> 00:15:20.100
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Because it's good, but it's not vintage. No,
358
00:15:20.120 --> 00:15:20.779
it's not classic.
359
00:15:20.840 --> 00:15:22.539
It's good. It's all good. Don't get me wrong.
360
00:15:22.679 --> 00:15:25.399
Talking about bedtime stories, you know, it's always a little
361
00:15:25.419 --> 00:15:27.259
bit of a thrill to go, ooh, who's doing bedtime
362
00:15:27.299 --> 00:15:30.139
story today? Oh, look, it's Tom Hardy. Or, you know,
363
00:15:30.179 --> 00:15:32.500
it's Sam Mendes. Or, you know, it's like some odd
364
00:15:32.559 --> 00:15:37.340
people show up. The big gig for that, I'm guessing,
365
00:15:37.620 --> 00:15:39.120
Christmas Eve, Christmas Day.
366
00:15:39.500 --> 00:15:39.899
Oh, yeah.
367
00:15:39.940 --> 00:15:42.360
Guess who did Christmas Eve and Christmas Day?
368
00:15:42.379 --> 00:15:42.820
Who?
369
00:15:43.539 --> 00:15:44.860
Bloody Justin. Both of them.
370
00:15:44.879 --> 00:15:44.940
No!
371
00:15:46.200 --> 00:15:47.950
Because he's just not on enough.
372
00:15:49.889 --> 00:15:51.470
He only comes out for the big events.
373
00:15:51.549 --> 00:15:52.549
I'll do Christmas-ish.
374
00:15:53.169 --> 00:15:54.879
Oh, yeah. Leave it to me.
375
00:15:55.259 --> 00:15:57.120
Night before Christmas, that's mine.
376
00:15:58.480 --> 00:15:59.440
Because he actually.
377
00:15:59.159 --> 00:16:01.909
Did The Night Before Christmas on The Night Before Christmas.
378
00:16:01.950 --> 00:16:03.169
That was a big gig and he got that.
379
00:16:03.210 --> 00:16:04.190
But I mean, all that.
380
00:16:04.289 --> 00:16:06.149
I mean, I do think his show is amazing. Do
381
00:16:06.169 --> 00:16:07.870
you think you could do that?
382
00:16:07.929 --> 00:16:11.009
Would you be good as a kind of children's Mr.
383
00:16:11.049 --> 00:16:11.980
Tumble actor?
384
00:16:12.149 --> 00:16:13.559
I don't know about that.
385
00:16:13.840 --> 00:16:16.879
When you're watching that, are you seeing the craft? Do
386
00:16:16.899 --> 00:16:17.580
you know what I mean?
387
00:16:18.100 --> 00:16:20.580
Well, we have a lot of conversations about it is
388
00:16:20.620 --> 00:16:25.070
a real skill. to be able to do the talking
389
00:16:25.110 --> 00:16:29.509
to kids on TV without, on the one hand, sounding
390
00:16:29.549 --> 00:16:33.340
patronizing and condescending, but then on the other hand, coming
391
00:16:33.740 --> 00:16:36.500
across as really creepy. Because a lot of actors, I've
392
00:16:36.519 --> 00:16:38.500
noticed a lot of actors go on the bedtime stories thing,
393
00:16:38.519 --> 00:16:40.379
and they've clearly gone, right, I'm not talking down to
394
00:16:40.399 --> 00:16:42.639
the kids. I'm not talking down. I'm just going to
395
00:16:42.659 --> 00:16:46.379
speak to them straight. And then they come across really scary.
396
00:16:46.419 --> 00:16:49.740
LAUGHTER And I think it's a mistake. So it's a
397
00:16:49.759 --> 00:16:51.500
real skill to be able to do that. A lot
398
00:16:51.559 --> 00:16:53.779
of them are really good. But what I do find
399
00:16:53.799 --> 00:16:56.139
myself doing, and this happened with Lily as well when
400
00:16:56.179 --> 00:17:00.230
she was little, and essentially really had made a difference
401
00:17:00.250 --> 00:17:03.870
to my career because people now think that I'm very
402
00:17:03.909 --> 00:17:05.170
good at, you know, I must have been good at
403
00:17:05.210 --> 00:17:07.210
doing impersonations and that kind of stuff when I was
404
00:17:07.230 --> 00:17:07.480
growing up.
405
00:17:07.630 --> 00:17:08.130
I was terrible.
406
00:17:08.529 --> 00:17:10.730
I couldn't do impersonations. I wasn't that person at all.
407
00:17:11.289 --> 00:17:13.819
I couldn't mimic anyone or anything like that. And then
408
00:17:13.859 --> 00:17:17.119
when Lily was really little, she would watch, you know,
409
00:17:17.740 --> 00:17:20.950
Disney films, Pixar films, whatever it was. And she would
410
00:17:20.970 --> 00:17:25.539
then want us to tell her stories about those things
411
00:17:25.599 --> 00:17:29.099
that she'd watched. And she would like, Because she was
412
00:17:29.130 --> 00:17:31.500
totally non-judgmental, I would just have a go at doing
413
00:17:31.519 --> 00:17:35.480
the voices of those characters. And slowly, over time, I
414
00:17:35.519 --> 00:17:37.900
found I was quite good at doing them. I get
415
00:17:37.940 --> 00:17:40.700
really quite close to the voices and stuff. So it
416
00:17:40.920 --> 00:17:43.099
eventually ended up to the point where it gave me
417
00:17:43.119 --> 00:17:46.160
the confidence to have a go at doing Tony Blair
418
00:17:46.200 --> 00:17:47.619
and that kind of stuff. I wouldn't have had the
419
00:17:47.660 --> 00:17:49.319
confidence to do it had I not done it.
420
00:17:49.420 --> 00:17:52.839
If you hadn't done Woody from Toy Story or whatever.
421
00:17:52.900 --> 00:17:54.079
Exactly, yeah.
422
00:17:54.099 --> 00:17:55.440
Sully from Monsters, Inc.
423
00:17:55.680 --> 00:17:59.779
all that, yeah. And all seven dwarves in Snow White
424
00:17:59.819 --> 00:18:02.509
and the Seven Dwarves. Yeah, she used to, she got
425
00:18:02.529 --> 00:18:06.089
to the point, yeah. She would say, Snow White and
426
00:18:06.109 --> 00:18:08.250
the Seven Dwarves, Daddy. And she would be Snow White,
427
00:18:08.309 --> 00:18:10.029
she would just sit there, and then she would make
428
00:18:10.089 --> 00:18:13.089
me be all seven dwarves doing stuff. And she would
429
00:18:13.130 --> 00:18:16.569
slowly get quieter and quieter, so she wouldn't add anything
430
00:18:16.609 --> 00:18:18.390
to it as Snow White, and the seven dwarves would
431
00:18:18.430 --> 00:18:21.710
just have a conversation around her. That's what she enjoyed
432
00:18:21.730 --> 00:18:22.049
the most.
433
00:18:22.069 --> 00:18:23.690
Wow. I was exhausted by the end of every day.
434
00:18:23.710 --> 00:18:24.130
Exhausted.
435
00:18:25.990 --> 00:18:27.490
So that grumpy must have been easy then.
436
00:18:27.410 --> 00:18:29.289
By the end. Yeah, exactly.
437
00:18:30.089 --> 00:18:31.910
But with Lyra, what I'm finding now is because we
438
00:18:31.950 --> 00:18:34.119
watch so much like CBeebies and all that kind of stuff,
439
00:18:34.759 --> 00:18:38.019
I do find myself, because you were asking, do I
440
00:18:38.059 --> 00:18:39.160
do the voices of any characters?
441
00:18:39.279 --> 00:18:39.980
I don't.
442
00:18:40.789 --> 00:18:43.309
But I do find myself trying to have a go
443
00:18:43.410 --> 00:18:46.230
at all of them, all the Peppa Pig characters, all
444
00:18:46.250 --> 00:18:48.769
the Moon and Me characters, all in the nightgown, all
445
00:18:48.809 --> 00:18:51.410
of that. And in the back of my head, I'm like, yeah, I.
446
00:18:51.390 --> 00:18:51.789
Could do that.
447
00:18:51.849 --> 00:18:54.390
I could step into that. If old Derek Jacoby decides
448
00:18:54.430 --> 00:18:56.369
to give it a miss, I could pop in that.
449
00:18:56.529 --> 00:18:59.250
Could you give us a line or two of a
450
00:18:59.309 --> 00:19:00.210
children's CB recap?
451
00:19:00.390 --> 00:19:04.309
Well, I mean, Moon and Me, I think, is the best.
452
00:19:04.549 --> 00:19:05.430
Moon and Me is the best.
453
00:19:05.930 --> 00:19:07.599
I think it's a wonderful, wonderful show.
454
00:19:07.619 --> 00:19:08.640
I've not seen Moon and Me.
455
00:19:08.660 --> 00:19:11.380
Oh, it's so good. I have to give it a whirl. Yeah,
456
00:19:11.400 --> 00:19:11.740
it's great.
457
00:19:11.759 --> 00:19:12.359
It's fantastic.
458
00:19:12.380 --> 00:19:15.220
Your kid's a bit old for it now, I think, maybe. Oh, really?
459
00:19:15.359 --> 00:19:17.880
It's shot so beautifully.
460
00:19:18.059 --> 00:19:19.849
It's like a good In the Night Garden.
461
00:19:20.109 --> 00:19:22.490
Yeah, and they should swap it around, because In the
462
00:19:22.529 --> 00:19:25.490
Night Garden is quite frantic and gets her a bit
463
00:19:25.569 --> 00:19:27.569
worked up, Whereas Moonami, which is.
464
00:19:27.589 --> 00:19:29.829
On earlier, is very relaxing.
465
00:19:29.869 --> 00:19:32.559
So I think Moonami should finish. Anyway, that's all.
466
00:19:32.599 --> 00:19:34.380
In the night garden reminds me of the weird bit
467
00:19:34.420 --> 00:19:37.039
of Glastonbury in the night garden. I mean, you go
468
00:19:37.059 --> 00:19:38.960
in that one field, you're in there for like two minutes,
469
00:19:38.980 --> 00:19:40.200
but nah, not that.
470
00:19:40.380 --> 00:19:41.680
Let's go back, killers are on.
471
00:19:41.680 --> 00:19:43.549
I had to kill for an hour to get into
472
00:19:43.569 --> 00:19:45.109
this field and now it's just.
473
00:19:46.069 --> 00:19:49.269
You're a fucking lunatic. Oh no, it's the Ninky Dom.
474
00:19:50.160 --> 00:19:50.880
Not for me.
475
00:19:55.160 --> 00:19:56.740
Rob, you've got this to look forward to.
476
00:19:56.980 --> 00:19:57.339
Oh, God.
477
00:19:57.500 --> 00:19:59.849
So we've got this thing in our house called Shark Week.
478
00:19:59.880 --> 00:20:01.349
Have you ever heard of Shark Week? Do you know
479
00:20:01.369 --> 00:20:01.730
what that is?
480
00:20:01.849 --> 00:20:03.109
Is that on National Geographic?
481
00:20:03.250 --> 00:20:03.549
Were they.
482
00:20:05.490 --> 00:20:09.789
Okay, it is also a show on National Geographic. But
483
00:20:09.829 --> 00:20:12.849
it's also what I think a man came up with it,
484
00:20:12.859 --> 00:20:15.880
by the way, what some people call being on your period.
485
00:20:17.220 --> 00:20:19.420
I know you guys and you don't want to talk
486
00:20:19.460 --> 00:20:20.500
about it, but you've got girls.
487
00:20:20.539 --> 00:20:21.509
I'm not talking about it.
488
00:20:21.819 --> 00:20:23.039
Yeah, you're going to need.
489
00:20:22.900 --> 00:20:23.500
To know this.
490
00:20:23.539 --> 00:20:25.920
So something to do with the moon, please get someone
491
00:20:25.940 --> 00:20:28.720
to email in or whatever, let you know exactly what
492
00:20:28.740 --> 00:20:30.920
it is. But something to do with the moon causes
493
00:20:31.180 --> 00:20:33.049
all the females in the house to be on their
494
00:20:33.109 --> 00:20:34.130
period at the same time.
495
00:20:34.809 --> 00:20:35.390
Oh, my God.
496
00:20:35.750 --> 00:20:38.039
Yeah.
497
00:20:38.150 --> 00:20:41.140
So my husband, like, he goes to B & Q for, like,
498
00:20:41.799 --> 00:20:42.339
eight hours.
499
00:20:42.640 --> 00:20:47.519
LAUGHTER But you.
500
00:20:47.519 --> 00:20:49.700
All acknowledge it and you've called it Shark Light. That's
501
00:20:49.740 --> 00:20:51.000
a good way of kind.
502
00:20:50.769 --> 00:20:54.069
Of- Yeah, there was a point where at first my
503
00:20:54.089 --> 00:20:57.109
husband was like, what the hell is going on? And
504
00:20:58.410 --> 00:21:01.269
then we kind of realized it. I mean, we'd always known,
505
00:21:01.329 --> 00:21:04.509
but it wasn't a thing. But when you're all on lockdown,
506
00:21:04.609 --> 00:21:07.450
you can't help but it be a thing. And yeah,
507
00:21:07.490 --> 00:21:09.990
and so, yeah, periods are something that we just talk
508
00:21:10.049 --> 00:21:12.589
about and it's just like, yeah, okay, so this is happening.
509
00:21:12.630 --> 00:21:16.039
This is why I'm being an absolute B. And, you know,
510
00:21:16.099 --> 00:21:18.380
and not, you just have to deal with it, but
511
00:21:18.410 --> 00:21:20.599
just let, can everybody just tread carefully?
512
00:21:21.039 --> 00:21:22.779
Yeah, so it's sort of like an accepted thing. And
513
00:21:22.819 --> 00:21:24.440
then that way he's not going to get in trouble
514
00:21:24.480 --> 00:21:25.279
for moaning and.
515
00:21:25.240 --> 00:21:27.880
Then you're not being defensive. It's sort of another thing.
516
00:21:28.079 --> 00:21:29.539
It's all going to be a bit touchy this week.
517
00:21:29.619 --> 00:21:32.339
It's sharp week. Let's just keep your heads down and
518
00:21:32.359 --> 00:21:35.859
plough through it. Exactly, exactly.
519
00:21:36.240 --> 00:21:38.519
But yeah, as I said, you've got that.
520
00:21:38.440 --> 00:21:39.240
To look forward to.
521
00:21:39.279 --> 00:21:40.279
That's a great term.
522
00:21:40.319 --> 00:21:41.579
Yeah, I can't wait for that.
523
00:21:41.619 --> 00:21:44.039
And I'm really regretting getting a female hamster and a
524
00:21:44.039 --> 00:21:44.640
female cat.
525
00:21:44.799 --> 00:21:49.059
Definitely. A tsunami of sharks.
526
00:21:51.420 --> 00:21:53.619
Do you find it more difficult to talk about your
527
00:21:53.660 --> 00:21:57.109
teenage daughters than you would about, say, a three-year-old or stuff?
528
00:21:57.170 --> 00:21:59.349
Because are you worried about what you would say about
529
00:21:59.390 --> 00:22:00.029
them in public?
530
00:22:00.259 --> 00:22:01.039
In a nutshell, yeah.
531
00:22:01.740 --> 00:22:04.759
Because I kind of, well, first of all, I know
532
00:22:04.779 --> 00:22:06.259
my kids are going to listen to this because they
533
00:22:06.299 --> 00:22:09.440
love the show as well. So, yeah, I am definitely
534
00:22:09.480 --> 00:22:11.339
conscious of what I say. But the thing is as well,
535
00:22:11.640 --> 00:22:15.230
like I would like to think that I communicate enough
536
00:22:15.450 --> 00:22:17.670
with my daughters for them to know exactly what I
537
00:22:17.730 --> 00:22:20.170
think of them, you know, and how much I love
538
00:22:20.210 --> 00:22:21.769
them and how amazing I think they are.
539
00:22:21.789 --> 00:22:22.009
Yeah.
540
00:22:23.259 --> 00:22:25.720
And also as well, I'm their mom. They're so used
541
00:22:25.740 --> 00:22:29.299
to me being outspoken and saying things and embarrassing them
542
00:22:29.319 --> 00:22:32.200
and like, oh, my God, did your mom really say that?
543
00:22:32.640 --> 00:22:35.460
And it's just like, yeah, she did.
544
00:22:35.920 --> 00:22:39.460
That's what she's like, you know. So, yeah, I don't
545
00:22:39.480 --> 00:22:43.200
think they'd be, you know, too upset. I hope not anyway.
546
00:22:43.460 --> 00:22:46.539
No, I think that's it, isn't it? If you're open
547
00:22:46.579 --> 00:22:49.359
at home and, you know, I think that's so much
548
00:22:49.400 --> 00:22:50.299
of the battle, isn't it?
549
00:22:50.769 --> 00:22:55.509
Definitely definitely communication is key that's um yeah number one
550
00:22:56.009 --> 00:22:58.950
uh number one apart from with the toddler that's i
551
00:22:59.049 --> 00:23:00.329
mean as you know it's.
552
00:23:01.170 --> 00:23:08.210
Just that's very much about number eight do.
553
00:23:07.230 --> 00:23:09.250
You feel like she gets away with a bit more
554
00:23:09.289 --> 00:23:11.309
though like how's your parenting change from a 20 year
555
00:23:11.329 --> 00:23:13.309
old to like a three-year-old now like are you a
556
00:23:13.309 --> 00:23:15.829
lot calmer and more laid back than you were with
557
00:23:15.849 --> 00:23:16.710
your first born.
558
00:23:16.769 --> 00:23:19.910
Yes definitely i think with um with my 20 year
559
00:23:19.950 --> 00:23:22.579
old i I say this all the time, like my
560
00:23:22.599 --> 00:23:26.799
20-year-old and kind of my 15-year-old, they were kind of
561
00:23:26.900 --> 00:23:31.869
tester kids. I feel like I can give my best
562
00:23:32.049 --> 00:23:35.230
to my youngest just because I feel like I know
563
00:23:35.269 --> 00:23:37.910
what works. I've tested what works. I've tested what doesn't work.
564
00:23:38.559 --> 00:23:42.240
And also my eldest two are very different to each other.
565
00:23:42.509 --> 00:23:45.549
So I've gotten a feel for, I feel like two
566
00:23:45.710 --> 00:23:50.349
ends of the spectrum. And so, yeah, with my youngest,
567
00:23:50.670 --> 00:23:52.829
I mean, let me tell you one thing. Lockdown has
568
00:23:52.869 --> 00:23:55.450
definitely changed. I was that parent that my child is
569
00:23:55.509 --> 00:24:00.170
never going to even touch an iPad until she's six. And,
570
00:24:00.250 --> 00:24:03.809
you know, and I was that parent and now she's,
571
00:24:03.910 --> 00:24:06.049
you know, I've got an iPad, but it's more or
572
00:24:06.089 --> 00:24:09.529
less hers. And I just, Oh my gosh, I saw
573
00:24:09.549 --> 00:24:12.579
this wicked quote the other day and it said, if
574
00:24:12.599 --> 00:24:15.900
you're worried about your child watching too much TV, put
575
00:24:15.940 --> 00:24:19.160
it on mute, put the subtitles on and then they're reading.
576
00:24:19.539 --> 00:24:20.849
And I thought, do you know what?
577
00:24:21.970 --> 00:24:22.609
That's a shout.
578
00:24:22.950 --> 00:24:23.869
Exactly.
579
00:24:25.430 --> 00:24:27.140
I do think, though, if you're worried about your kid
580
00:24:27.160 --> 00:24:29.619
watching too much TV, then the reality is you haven't
581
00:24:29.640 --> 00:24:30.039
got too.
582
00:24:29.940 --> 00:24:30.799
Many worries in your house.
583
00:24:31.119 --> 00:24:33.490
I mean, growing up, watching too much TV was the.
584
00:24:33.460 --> 00:24:36.650
Last thing anyone was worried about with what was going on.
585
00:24:36.670 --> 00:24:39.269
That's really... You've got to get yourself lucky, because then.
586
00:24:39.849 --> 00:24:41.910
You know, people that are worried about, you know, getting
587
00:24:41.930 --> 00:24:43.940
them to school or whatever or getting their dinner on.
588
00:24:43.980 --> 00:24:45.910
Yeah, exactly. A bit of telly won't hurt no one.
589
00:24:45.940 --> 00:24:47.000
It didn't do me any harm.
590
00:24:47.039 --> 00:24:47.299
Nah.
591
00:24:47.319 --> 00:24:49.839
Yeah, it's not going to be Marcus Rashford's next campaign.
592
00:24:49.859 --> 00:24:51.960
No, exactly.
593
00:24:51.980 --> 00:24:54.819
The problem is, because for me, though, I was going,
594
00:24:54.839 --> 00:24:56.589
I'm all right. I couldn't even read properly until I
595
00:24:56.589 --> 00:25:00.029
was about seven or eight. But I say that to
596
00:25:00.069 --> 00:25:01.710
Lou and she looks at me in disgust going, but
597
00:25:01.730 --> 00:25:08.690
that doesn't make it OK. LAUGHTER If you got a
598
00:25:08.730 --> 00:25:12.599
day completely to yourself, right, for whatever reason, like one night,
599
00:25:12.660 --> 00:25:14.460
full day, full night, what would you do with yourself, Joe?
600
00:25:14.500 --> 00:25:15.319
What would be your day?
601
00:25:15.759 --> 00:25:18.099
Do I have to be, is it with or without Stacey?
602
00:25:18.140 --> 00:25:20.619
Let's do with Stacey and do without Stacey. Without Stacey,
603
00:25:20.640 --> 00:25:22.319
what would you do?
604
00:25:22.339 --> 00:25:22.960
Oh, you know what?
605
00:25:23.279 --> 00:25:25.839
I haven't gone to the gym in about two years,
606
00:25:26.220 --> 00:25:29.220
so I'm getting really fat. I'd like to probably go gym.
607
00:25:29.299 --> 00:25:32.079
I go gym in the morning. I love my fishing.
608
00:25:32.140 --> 00:25:35.220
I go fishing all day, just by myself, no one
609
00:25:35.279 --> 00:25:38.609
around me. I'll put my rods in and just freaking
610
00:25:38.670 --> 00:25:39.230
zone out.
611
00:25:39.589 --> 00:25:41.619
And golf, you like golf as well, don't you? I
612
00:25:41.630 --> 00:25:44.400
was talking to Josh about it. Yeah, we went. Yeah,
613
00:25:44.420 --> 00:25:47.920
we went golf. Josh, I took Beckett Golf, right? For
614
00:25:47.960 --> 00:25:50.680
the hottest day of the year last year.
615
00:25:50.680 --> 00:25:51.099
35 degrees.
616
00:25:51.319 --> 00:25:55.509
And we didn't have no suntan lotion. I've never seen someone,
617
00:25:55.769 --> 00:25:56.890
and I'm the ginger one.
618
00:25:57.309 --> 00:25:57.910
I was fine.
619
00:25:58.750 --> 00:26:01.829
I've never seen someone go so red in my life.
620
00:26:03.410 --> 00:26:05.730
Honestly becky didn't we think you had heat stroke at
621
00:26:05.819 --> 00:26:06.630
one stage.
622
00:26:06.319 --> 00:26:08.039
Yeah at one point i had to lay down on
623
00:26:08.059 --> 00:26:11.079
the buggy didn't i just in the shade and.
624
00:26:11.019 --> 00:26:13.220
You pulled you like a bit of golf now didn't.
625
00:26:13.059 --> 00:26:15.240
You yeah i've started now i've tried to explain to
626
00:26:15.299 --> 00:26:17.650
josh it's a great way to get away from kids.
627
00:26:17.920 --> 00:26:20.750
Yeah do you know what this fishing sounding good because
628
00:26:20.769 --> 00:26:22.470
you don't actually have to do anything right.
629
00:26:22.470 --> 00:26:24.329
I love it you know what i've only just started
630
00:26:24.349 --> 00:26:27.519
getting into it um the last three months with my
631
00:26:27.559 --> 00:26:30.279
boy and we love it because we found the little
632
00:26:30.339 --> 00:26:32.619
place up in Essex where you get a little cabin
633
00:26:33.019 --> 00:26:35.039
and in the cabin you get like a little TV
634
00:26:35.099 --> 00:26:37.460
and a couple of beds and a little fridge and
635
00:26:37.480 --> 00:26:39.359
they bring you over your breakfast, your lunch and your
636
00:26:39.400 --> 00:26:41.539
dinner and you just put your rods out and just
637
00:26:41.559 --> 00:26:45.450
sit by the river. just catch it listen i've been
638
00:26:45.490 --> 00:26:50.609
fishing for three months i ain't caught one fish but
639
00:26:50.750 --> 00:26:52.869
there is not one bit of fishing equipment i haven't
640
00:26:52.950 --> 00:26:56.630
got mate i literally i literally if you was going
641
00:26:56.650 --> 00:26:58.970
to draw a picture of someone with all the gear
642
00:26:59.109 --> 00:27:04.170
no idea it's me but you know what it is
643
00:27:04.359 --> 00:27:06.099
becky becky you know what it is it's a step
644
00:27:06.150 --> 00:27:08.259
up from golf because golf Gets you out of the
645
00:27:08.279 --> 00:27:10.039
house for about three hours, doesn't it?
646
00:27:10.200 --> 00:27:10.920
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
647
00:27:10.940 --> 00:27:13.079
But the fishing, the fishing gets me out for like
648
00:27:13.140 --> 00:27:16.480
two days, mate. I love it. I'm out for like
649
00:27:16.599 --> 00:27:17.259
two nights.
650
00:27:17.339 --> 00:27:20.579
Well, my father-in-law, my father-in-law was talking to my mum
651
00:27:20.700 --> 00:27:22.500
about it. And he went, yeah, I go down to
652
00:27:22.519 --> 00:27:23.920
the coast and I get down there and I get
653
00:27:23.940 --> 00:27:24.579
my sandwich out.
654
00:27:24.640 --> 00:27:27.160
My thermos, and I got my chair. And he went,
655
00:27:27.660 --> 00:27:29.240
sometimes I don't even get my rods out.
656
00:27:29.259 --> 00:27:33.700
I just sit there for the day.
657
00:27:33.740 --> 00:27:35.440
Honestly, it's brilliant.
658
00:27:35.460 --> 00:27:38.480
We get a little fire going. I love it.
659
00:27:38.690 --> 00:27:39.250
I love it.
660
00:27:39.430 --> 00:27:42.029
And our life, what we do as well as a job,
661
00:27:42.450 --> 00:27:44.910
we're so busy and we're always sort of a hundred
662
00:27:44.950 --> 00:27:47.569
mile an hour and everyone's like in your face and
663
00:27:47.609 --> 00:27:49.490
you've always got to be happy. Like you said, you've
664
00:27:49.509 --> 00:27:51.670
always got to give the best side of you and
665
00:27:51.710 --> 00:27:54.170
stuff like that. And I think there's nothing better than
666
00:27:54.190 --> 00:27:56.230
just to do nothing and just to really just fucking,
667
00:27:56.789 --> 00:27:58.470
just think about real things for a little while.
668
00:27:58.509 --> 00:27:59.470
Yeah, totally agree.
669
00:27:59.509 --> 00:28:02.029
And just sort of like re-energize rather than just giving
670
00:28:02.089 --> 00:28:03.069
out energy the whole time.
671
00:28:03.730 --> 00:28:04.250
Exactly.
672
00:28:04.410 --> 00:28:05.490
One second, boys.
673
00:28:05.630 --> 00:28:07.220
Let me just put this kid in the bath. Wait there.
674
00:28:07.240 --> 00:28:08.319
Do you want to get in the bath?
675
00:28:08.900 --> 00:28:09.619
Give me one second.
676
00:28:09.640 --> 00:28:15.009
Stay there. This is great, though. This is live parenting
677
00:28:15.069 --> 00:28:15.769
in an interview.
678
00:28:15.950 --> 00:28:19.329
Oh, is he actually getting in the bath?
679
00:28:20.140 --> 00:28:20.400
Yeah.
680
00:28:20.460 --> 00:28:22.099
You know what? He was, I had a bath run
681
00:28:22.140 --> 00:28:22.599
earlier on.
682
00:28:22.980 --> 00:28:24.259
He was going to get in it, but he didn't.
683
00:28:24.640 --> 00:28:26.420
And I was just saying, he's chucked everything in there,
684
00:28:26.440 --> 00:28:27.299
all the deodorants.
685
00:28:27.380 --> 00:28:28.039
The brushes.
686
00:28:28.740 --> 00:28:31.119
So let him just play with him in the bath.
687
00:28:31.519 --> 00:28:33.839
It's easier this way. Yeah, exactly. Fair enough. Do you
688
00:28:33.859 --> 00:28:34.940
do shifts with Stacey then?
689
00:28:34.980 --> 00:28:37.279
If you've got work, like, so like you'll have Rex
690
00:28:37.319 --> 00:28:39.220
now from half 10 to half two and Stacey could
691
00:28:39.240 --> 00:28:40.660
do some work or whatever.
692
00:28:40.740 --> 00:28:42.160
How do you split it up?
693
00:28:42.220 --> 00:28:42.559
Or is it?
694
00:28:42.859 --> 00:28:45.500
No, I mean, we just sort of take it as
695
00:28:45.519 --> 00:28:47.920
it is. So like yesterday, Stacey was at work. She
696
00:28:47.940 --> 00:28:50.700
was at loose women. So, She leaves at about seven o'clock.
697
00:28:50.759 --> 00:28:53.539
So I just got up. I have the baby all day.
698
00:28:53.559 --> 00:28:55.339
We go for a walk in the forest and stuff.
699
00:28:55.359 --> 00:28:57.539
I have to do breakfast and lunch. And then when
700
00:28:57.579 --> 00:28:58.000
I'm at work.
701
00:28:58.019 --> 00:28:58.740
She'll do the same.
702
00:28:58.880 --> 00:29:00.779
But during the day when we both haven't got work,
703
00:29:01.619 --> 00:29:03.900
there's no timetable to it. But like Stacey will go,
704
00:29:03.920 --> 00:29:06.599
I'm just going to have a little 10 minutes. And
705
00:29:06.640 --> 00:29:08.059
she'll have 10 minutes. Or I'll say I'm going to
706
00:29:08.119 --> 00:29:11.559
have 10 minutes. So it's an unspoken thing. But yeah,
707
00:29:11.599 --> 00:29:14.680
we do sort of do shifts of such.
708
00:29:15.180 --> 00:29:17.220
What would you do, Joe, if you and Stacey, you've
709
00:29:17.240 --> 00:29:22.359
got a day together. No kids around. You going to
710
00:29:22.380 --> 00:29:22.980
take her fishing?
711
00:29:23.440 --> 00:29:24.519
I'd love to take her fishing.
712
00:29:24.539 --> 00:29:26.519
She's not having it at the moment.
713
00:29:26.579 --> 00:29:29.019
I think these days, I think it'd be nice to
714
00:29:29.059 --> 00:29:31.579
get up, cook her breakfast, then we'll go for a
715
00:29:31.579 --> 00:29:34.029
little walk. Then we'll have a little bit of time
716
00:29:34.069 --> 00:29:36.769
together in the afternoon. And then we'll have some dinner.
717
00:29:36.890 --> 00:29:39.970
And then we'll have a little bit more time later.
718
00:29:40.119 --> 00:29:43.559
On you know just some lovely time there's not been
719
00:29:43.579 --> 00:29:44.099
a lot of that.
720
00:29:44.019 --> 00:29:47.460
Time recently there's not been a lot of time recently.
721
00:29:47.309 --> 00:29:48.970
No so you'd like more time when was the last
722
00:29:48.990 --> 00:29:50.890
time you had time when was the last time you
723
00:29:50.930 --> 00:29:56.890
had time together.
724
00:29:54.150 --> 00:29:57.839
Mate honestly isn't it bad Isn't it bad, man? I
725
00:29:57.859 --> 00:30:00.650
don't even know. I don't even know.
726
00:30:00.829 --> 00:30:02.410
But, yeah, just.
727
00:30:03.549 --> 00:30:05.789
I'll be getting the timing as much as I could.
728
00:30:06.099 --> 00:30:10.059
Yeah, fair enough. I've got my final question I always ask.
729
00:30:09.960 --> 00:30:10.579
Everyone, Josh.
730
00:30:11.039 --> 00:30:11.660
Yeah.
731
00:30:12.099 --> 00:30:12.599
What would... Joe!
732
00:30:14.680 --> 00:30:16.130
Sorry, why don't you say it?
733
00:30:16.220 --> 00:30:18.240
I thought you were genuinely talking to me then, right?
734
00:30:18.460 --> 00:30:20.980
No, no. Joe, one final question, Joe.
735
00:30:21.599 --> 00:30:23.279
We're so similar, me and Joe Swash.
736
00:30:23.519 --> 00:30:25.480
I know, that's why I get it. It's just, all
737
00:30:25.539 --> 00:30:27.619
I can see is just big curly ginger hair. That's
738
00:30:27.640 --> 00:30:28.119
the problem.
739
00:30:29.539 --> 00:30:32.720
Is there something that your partner does, in this case, Stacey,
740
00:30:32.819 --> 00:30:35.440
something Stacey does, that as a parent annoys you a
741
00:30:35.440 --> 00:30:37.640
little bit, that you can't really say without being a rowl,
742
00:30:38.000 --> 00:30:40.980
obviously it's taken that stacy's an incredible mother but there's
743
00:30:41.009 --> 00:30:42.809
something that she does you disagree with that annoys you
744
00:30:42.829 --> 00:30:44.529
a bit that you can't bring up because there'll be
745
00:30:44.549 --> 00:30:46.890
a row but if she did listen to this she
746
00:30:46.910 --> 00:30:48.950
would hear it and go oh yeah maybe he's right
747
00:30:49.150 --> 00:30:50.349
what would that be.
748
00:30:50.569 --> 00:30:55.190
So stacy lays out certain rules parenting rules that we've
749
00:30:55.230 --> 00:30:57.910
got to follow but she doesn't follow her own rules
750
00:30:58.349 --> 00:31:01.190
so like for instance i'll give the baby a little
751
00:31:01.230 --> 00:31:03.589
bit of orange juice in his cup yeah and she'll
752
00:31:03.630 --> 00:31:06.299
go oh my god You're going to get him for
753
00:31:06.339 --> 00:31:06.910
his tea.
754
00:31:07.319 --> 00:31:08.279
You're off your head.
755
00:31:08.599 --> 00:31:10.579
She'll make a big thing about it, yeah, and I'm like, oh,
756
00:31:10.640 --> 00:31:13.420
I'm going to do that again. And then, like, a
757
00:31:13.460 --> 00:31:15.579
week later, she'll be like, oh, shall we let him
758
00:31:15.619 --> 00:31:21.039
have a little bit of orange juice? I think sometimes
759
00:31:21.220 --> 00:31:25.660
it's the hypocrisy of a parenting. that does me in.
760
00:31:25.960 --> 00:31:27.700
It's the things that she's allowed to do that I'm
761
00:31:27.740 --> 00:31:30.059
not allowed to do. But apart from that, like you said,
762
00:31:30.180 --> 00:31:30.799
she's amazing.
763
00:31:31.079 --> 00:31:32.859
And what would you, and what would she say about you?
764
00:31:32.920 --> 00:31:35.259
What thing annoys her about the way you parent?
765
00:31:35.880 --> 00:31:38.920
Yeah, she hates it. I've got this thing where I'm
766
00:31:38.980 --> 00:31:41.549
a little bit lazy when it comes, because sometimes you
767
00:31:41.569 --> 00:31:43.210
have a little smell, you're like, has he had his shit?
768
00:31:43.569 --> 00:31:44.410
Is he got a poo?
769
00:31:44.730 --> 00:31:45.430
I don't know.
770
00:31:45.849 --> 00:31:47.630
And then I've got to take all his clothes off
771
00:31:47.690 --> 00:31:50.029
and fucking take his clothes off to realise it weren't
772
00:31:50.069 --> 00:31:51.509
a poo and put all his clothes back on.
773
00:31:51.569 --> 00:31:51.849
Yeah.
774
00:31:52.150 --> 00:31:55.609
So, I like now just to dip my finger in.
775
00:31:55.630 --> 00:31:56.430
So I just.
776
00:32:01.640 --> 00:32:03.980
I just find a little gap in his baby grow
777
00:32:04.019 --> 00:32:06.000
and I work my way down and I find a
778
00:32:06.039 --> 00:32:08.299
little gap and I dip my finger in and then
779
00:32:08.839 --> 00:32:12.619
I go, no, he's all right, nothing wrong. And then
780
00:32:12.900 --> 00:32:15.180
on a lot of occasions, you're like, you don't even
781
00:32:15.200 --> 00:32:17.569
have to smell your finger, you're like, yeah, yeah.
782
00:32:17.880 --> 00:32:20.230
Yeah, the orange juice isn't the issue there, Joe. I'm
783
00:32:20.269 --> 00:32:22.049
more on Stacey's side than you there, mate.
784
00:32:22.210 --> 00:32:25.690
I think Stacey's got a point. What? What, no, you
785
00:32:25.710 --> 00:32:26.269
can't just.
786
00:32:27.069 --> 00:32:29.029
It's too much of a risk to put your finger
787
00:32:29.089 --> 00:32:33.039
into potential human shit just to save a bit of time.
788
00:32:33.099 --> 00:32:36.140
Come on, you must admit, your own child's shit is not...
789
00:32:36.799 --> 00:32:41.269
I look at Rex's shit like... Like it's Play-Doh.
790
00:32:41.509 --> 00:32:42.609
Do you know what I mean?
791
00:32:42.630 --> 00:32:45.319
Because it's his. Because it's come from him.
792
00:32:45.339 --> 00:32:47.319
Could you love him so much you don't mind his shit?
793
00:32:47.519 --> 00:32:49.000
Is that what you're saying?
794
00:32:49.099 --> 00:32:51.099
I could be elbow deep in his shit and I'd.
795
00:32:51.039 --> 00:32:53.259
Be like, oh, it's all right.
796
00:32:54.119 --> 00:32:55.880
I don't think there's a person who's spoken to who
797
00:32:55.940 --> 00:32:57.549
loves their kids as much as you, Joe.
798
00:32:57.640 --> 00:32:58.970
And I think it comes across.
799
00:33:00.559 --> 00:33:03.980
I've got an off-topic question about restaurants, Jared.
800
00:33:04.460 --> 00:33:05.299
Oh, love it.
801
00:33:05.660 --> 00:33:05.920
Yeah.
802
00:33:06.240 --> 00:33:07.599
I don't know if this is the forum.
803
00:33:08.000 --> 00:33:08.940
We'll soon find out.
804
00:33:08.960 --> 00:33:09.880
You once told me.
805
00:33:10.380 --> 00:33:11.740
What the hell are you going to ask?
806
00:33:11.779 --> 00:33:12.099
Yeah.
807
00:33:12.960 --> 00:33:15.460
You once told me about Priscilla Presley taking you to
808
00:33:15.480 --> 00:33:16.059
a restaurant.
809
00:33:16.400 --> 00:33:16.599
Yes.
810
00:33:16.660 --> 00:33:19.220
And it remains one of the best anecdotes I've ever
811
00:33:19.240 --> 00:33:24.039
heard in my life. I know it's off-topic.
812
00:33:24.220 --> 00:33:25.769
It is off-topic. Can I just ask.
813
00:33:26.970 --> 00:33:29.130
Do you know what? Let's set up normally. Jared, have
814
00:33:29.150 --> 00:33:30.910
you ever been to a restaurant with Priscilla Presley?
815
00:33:32.269 --> 00:33:33.859
You should get a chat show, Josh.
816
00:33:34.779 --> 00:33:40.420
That was so slick. Well, funny you should say that, Josh.
817
00:33:41.700 --> 00:33:42.079
That's weird.
818
00:33:42.099 --> 00:33:43.140
That was my next question.
819
00:33:45.819 --> 00:33:49.880
Well, yeah, I did Pento with Priscilla Presley. What was
820
00:33:49.900 --> 00:33:54.500
she like? She was amazing. She was genuinely amazing. Look,
821
00:33:54.880 --> 00:33:59.299
she's such a big celebrity that everyone was really that
822
00:33:59.400 --> 00:34:03.460
the first rehearsals, everyone was really nervous, um, of what
823
00:34:03.500 --> 00:34:05.400
she's going to be like and stuff like that. And
824
00:34:05.869 --> 00:34:10.170
they're basically wanting us to, you know, tread on eggshells
825
00:34:10.210 --> 00:34:13.690
around her until we could figure out, you know, what
826
00:34:13.730 --> 00:34:16.130
she is like. Um, I had to do a photo
827
00:34:16.150 --> 00:34:20.630
shoot with her and Warwick Davis at the Savoy hotel.
828
00:34:21.460 --> 00:34:24.539
And I am, I'm aware that, like, I was third
829
00:34:24.639 --> 00:34:27.219
billed in this panto, but I'm aware there's a big
830
00:34:27.300 --> 00:34:36.739
drop from second billing to third billing. You guys know me.
831
00:34:36.800 --> 00:34:38.289
I'm a realistic bloke, right?
832
00:34:38.349 --> 00:34:41.289
You know when a football team have spent all their
833
00:34:41.329 --> 00:34:42.289
money on Ronaldo?
834
00:34:42.730 --> 00:34:43.230
Yeah.
835
00:34:43.329 --> 00:34:45.889
And then there's some good players in the team, Jared.
836
00:34:45.909 --> 00:34:46.969
Thomas Graveson turns up.
837
00:34:46.989 --> 00:34:48.929
There's some solid players in the team.
838
00:34:49.469 --> 00:34:49.710
Yeah.
839
00:34:49.889 --> 00:34:50.030
Yeah.
840
00:34:50.610 --> 00:34:52.449
But Priscilla Presley is selling the shirts.
841
00:34:52.849 --> 00:34:53.389
Big time.
842
00:34:53.610 --> 00:34:55.539
Big time. And, you know, Warwick's selling a bit of
843
00:34:55.559 --> 00:35:00.920
merch too. Oh, yeah. So we're in the Savoy Hotel
844
00:35:01.159 --> 00:35:05.539
and they've got paparazzi there. I'm talking like 30 photographers.
845
00:35:05.699 --> 00:35:07.469
And, you know, I knew what was going to happen.
846
00:35:07.989 --> 00:35:10.690
And it happened exactly how I thought it would. And
847
00:35:11.349 --> 00:35:13.929
so Priscilla goes out and they're all clicking away, clicking away.
848
00:35:14.480 --> 00:35:17.199
shouting her name and stuff. Then Warwick goes out, clicking away,
849
00:35:17.480 --> 00:35:19.099
shouting her name. Then I walk out.
850
00:35:19.500 --> 00:35:20.079
One click.
851
00:35:20.460 --> 00:35:21.280
We're done now.
852
00:35:22.039 --> 00:35:22.300
Right?
853
00:35:24.280 --> 00:35:25.820
One click's worse than zero.
854
00:35:26.159 --> 00:35:26.469
Mate.
855
00:35:26.679 --> 00:35:27.260
Is it though?
856
00:35:27.530 --> 00:35:30.230
I got a zero click at the NTAs.
857
00:35:30.769 --> 00:35:34.230
I was behind Talisa and it was like every single
858
00:35:34.329 --> 00:35:37.309
flash of every comer went off when Talisa walked past.
859
00:35:37.409 --> 00:35:39.650
And then I stood there and they went, yep, keep going.
860
00:35:39.670 --> 00:35:40.389
I went, yeah, fair enough.
861
00:35:40.409 --> 00:35:44.420
LAUGHTER So I've been no clicked. So one click, I'll
862
00:35:44.460 --> 00:35:45.059
take that Jared.
863
00:35:45.400 --> 00:35:48.250
Mate, one click. And then I stood there and the
864
00:35:48.469 --> 00:35:50.750
PR person said, do you want to take any more?
865
00:35:50.809 --> 00:35:53.110
And I said, no, no, I think I'm done. Thanks guys. Thanks.
866
00:35:56.550 --> 00:35:59.590
When I used to support Stephen Merchant on tour. Amazing.
867
00:35:59.630 --> 00:36:02.539
And we'd go out afterwards and there'd obviously be loads
868
00:36:02.599 --> 00:36:05.179
of people out the back of the theater and they'd
869
00:36:05.219 --> 00:36:09.880
all queue for the photo with him. And then occasionally
870
00:36:09.980 --> 00:36:11.840
someone would ask for a photo with me and you'd
871
00:36:12.389 --> 00:36:15.690
And it'd be embarrassing. But worse was occasionally someone would say,
872
00:36:15.710 --> 00:36:17.809
do you want me to get a photo with you?
873
00:36:17.829 --> 00:36:20.969
That was pity.
874
00:36:20.989 --> 00:36:22.449
Yeah, pity.
875
00:36:22.769 --> 00:36:24.050
They're offering me.
876
00:36:24.070 --> 00:36:27.380
A pity photo. Is there anything worse?
877
00:36:27.400 --> 00:36:30.099
So you've been one clicked. You're in the Savoy with
878
00:36:30.179 --> 00:36:30.880
Warwick Davis.
879
00:36:30.900 --> 00:36:31.780
Yeah, one click.
880
00:36:33.139 --> 00:36:34.929
And then we go into this other room to have
881
00:36:34.989 --> 00:36:39.550
interviews with journalists. And, you know, all the big papers
882
00:36:39.590 --> 00:36:41.889
are there. And then I'm in the corner with the
883
00:36:41.989 --> 00:36:47.159
Wimbledon Gazette. And the journalist guy says to me, do
884
00:36:47.179 --> 00:36:50.650
you think I'll get a chance to interview Priscilla? And
885
00:36:50.690 --> 00:36:56.969
I said, no, absolutely not. And he was like, well,
886
00:36:56.989 --> 00:36:58.489
can you just go in? And I was like, mate,
887
00:36:58.730 --> 00:37:01.940
there's a reason I'm having an interview with you. I
888
00:37:02.380 --> 00:37:05.880
don't even want to be, you know, I'm not looking
889
00:37:05.960 --> 00:37:07.940
over at the Guardian going, I wonder if I'll get
890
00:37:07.980 --> 00:37:10.659
a shot at getting an interview with the Guardian. Let's
891
00:37:10.699 --> 00:37:13.039
do the interview and let's go and get some lunch, mate.
892
00:37:13.059 --> 00:37:18.070
It doesn't matter. I really want to talk to Priscilla Presley.
893
00:37:18.090 --> 00:37:19.789
And I'm like, yeah, I want to be in the Telegraph.
894
00:37:19.869 --> 00:37:24.380
Come on, mate. just realize where you are in the
895
00:37:24.420 --> 00:37:24.900
world all.
896
00:37:24.860 --> 00:37:30.460
Right and they priscilla prisley had a fake apple and
897
00:37:30.500 --> 00:37:33.019
she says do you want me to bite it do
898
00:37:33.969 --> 00:37:36.010
she said something like do you want me to actually bite.
899
00:37:35.849 --> 00:37:39.969
It and i said before without even thinking only if
900
00:37:39.989 --> 00:37:44.880
you want to fucking die and there was silence silence
901
00:37:46.599 --> 00:37:51.159
And then Priscilla started laughing and everybody did that really annoying,
902
00:37:51.380 --> 00:37:56.679
sycophantic sort of, once she started laughing, everyone was like, oh.
903
00:37:59.159 --> 00:38:04.119
Oh, that's spoken like a real comedian. I've felt that
904
00:38:04.179 --> 00:38:04.820
feeling before.
905
00:38:05.679 --> 00:38:08.590
But that silence for a couple of seconds where everyone's like,
906
00:38:08.730 --> 00:38:10.250
oh my God, I can't believe you've just said that.
907
00:38:10.530 --> 00:38:14.159
So she was great skill. She was awesome. And this
908
00:38:14.179 --> 00:38:15.820
has taken me a long time to get to the
909
00:38:15.860 --> 00:38:16.599
story you wanted me.
910
00:38:16.539 --> 00:38:18.500
To tell you. No, but I loved the story on
911
00:38:18.519 --> 00:38:19.639
the way. I didn't know there was more.
912
00:38:19.659 --> 00:38:22.039
Oh, there's been a hell of a journey with her.
913
00:38:22.059 --> 00:38:23.440
There has.
914
00:38:23.579 --> 00:38:27.940
In the panto, I was her henchman. I was the
915
00:38:28.659 --> 00:38:30.380
woodcutter or whatever it is. I was the one who
916
00:38:30.400 --> 00:38:34.179
was meant to murder Snow White, but I didn't. So
917
00:38:34.260 --> 00:38:36.780
every time I went on stage, I would improvise a
918
00:38:36.980 --> 00:38:42.239
new name for her. Hello, my queen of delayed tubes.
919
00:38:42.789 --> 00:38:45.070
you know, hello, my queen of anything negative that was
920
00:38:45.110 --> 00:38:47.690
in the story in the news, I would try and
921
00:38:47.730 --> 00:38:51.429
spin it in each time. And there was one time
922
00:38:51.469 --> 00:38:53.710
where I went on and called her the queen of
923
00:38:53.869 --> 00:38:56.510
awkward family photos. Do you remember that website?
924
00:38:56.829 --> 00:38:57.030
Yeah.
925
00:38:57.590 --> 00:38:57.809
Yeah.
926
00:38:58.070 --> 00:38:59.050
So I called her that.
927
00:38:59.349 --> 00:38:59.489
Yeah.
928
00:39:00.429 --> 00:39:02.329
It was massive in 2013.
929
00:39:02.329 --> 00:39:03.449
It was popping off on Bebo.
930
00:39:05.369 --> 00:39:07.070
And MySpace. It was all over MySpace.
931
00:39:07.230 --> 00:39:07.469
Yeah.
932
00:39:07.929 --> 00:39:12.139
And so I said that and she on stage. just
933
00:39:12.199 --> 00:39:15.360
turns to me and says what did you say whoa
934
00:39:15.500 --> 00:39:19.690
and i went uh uh queen of awkward family photos
935
00:39:19.789 --> 00:39:22.130
and she said what photos have you seen and in
936
00:39:22.170 --> 00:39:24.349
my head i'm going oh man she has taken this.
937
00:39:25.190 --> 00:39:30.030
She doesn't know about the website Awkward Family Photos. So
938
00:39:30.070 --> 00:39:34.260
I'm just panicking on stage, right, looking at her thinking, oh,
939
00:39:34.639 --> 00:39:36.500
I thought this was a pretty safe bet, this line,
940
00:39:36.539 --> 00:39:40.659
but it has gone into murky waters. And then I said,
941
00:39:41.079 --> 00:39:43.340
I haven't seen any photos. And she said, we'll talk
942
00:39:43.380 --> 00:39:45.500
about this. We'll talk about this off stage.
943
00:39:46.280 --> 00:39:47.079
Whoa.
944
00:39:47.239 --> 00:39:49.039
The audience are wetting themselves, right?
945
00:39:49.219 --> 00:39:49.440
Yeah.
946
00:39:50.309 --> 00:39:54.650
I was shitting myself, but I was aware I was
947
00:39:54.690 --> 00:39:56.750
on stage, so I was really playing up the panic
948
00:39:56.789 --> 00:40:00.130
as well. And in panto, if things like that happen,
949
00:40:00.150 --> 00:40:03.190
people just think it's part of the show. So they're
950
00:40:03.230 --> 00:40:06.639
just laughing and going with it. And we walk off
951
00:40:06.679 --> 00:40:09.510
stage after that scene, and she says, I'm not talking
952
00:40:09.550 --> 00:40:12.059
to you, and just walks off. I was like, oh, man.
953
00:40:12.639 --> 00:40:13.000
Oh, man.
954
00:40:13.099 --> 00:40:15.820
And then I had like 30 minutes until my next
955
00:40:15.840 --> 00:40:18.039
scene with her where she's in a harness and she's
956
00:40:18.119 --> 00:40:21.780
being– hoisted up to fly across the stage right and
957
00:40:21.800 --> 00:40:23.599
i think i'm gonna i'm gonna talk to her before
958
00:40:23.619 --> 00:40:26.099
we go on for this scene oh god so she's
959
00:40:26.119 --> 00:40:27.780
getting hooked up in the harness could i.
960
00:40:27.739 --> 00:40:30.260
Just say this isn't even the story asked for either.
961
00:40:29.980 --> 00:40:36.019
I'm sorry this is this is what the podcast is
962
00:40:36.079 --> 00:40:37.679
about this is this.
963
00:40:37.619 --> 00:40:41.239
Is unbelievable i i genuinely i'm in a spinny chair
964
00:40:41.260 --> 00:40:43.119
and i've had to turn away from my mic because
965
00:40:43.159 --> 00:40:44.420
i'm too awkward.
966
00:40:47.030 --> 00:40:49.690
So she's getting hooked up in this harness to fly
967
00:40:50.329 --> 00:40:52.789
and I go up to her and, you know, I
968
00:40:52.809 --> 00:40:57.449
just say, look, Priscilla, I'm really sorry. I didn't mean
969
00:40:57.489 --> 00:41:01.309
to offend you about that awkward family photo. There's a
970
00:41:01.369 --> 00:41:05.639
website called Awkward Family Photos and it's, you know, people
971
00:41:05.699 --> 00:41:10.119
just putting in their own family photos. And, you know,
972
00:41:10.199 --> 00:41:12.019
a lot of them are from the 80s and it's
973
00:41:12.079 --> 00:41:13.199
all about their hairstyles.
974
00:41:13.920 --> 00:41:15.019
And, you know.
975
00:41:15.630 --> 00:41:17.840
Some people dress up in the same jumper and it's just,
976
00:41:17.860 --> 00:41:20.460
you know, I'm just rattling on. She's just staring at me.
977
00:41:20.639 --> 00:41:23.659
And then she slowly starts getting lifted up, slowly starts
978
00:41:23.699 --> 00:41:26.880
getting lifted up. And then she just says to me, yeah,
979
00:41:26.900 --> 00:41:28.460
I know what it was. I was just winding you up.
980
00:41:28.760 --> 00:41:31.760
And then just gets taken on stage. And I was like,
981
00:41:32.619 --> 00:41:37.369
I cannot believe she just played me for 30 minutes.
982
00:41:37.550 --> 00:41:38.949
I was sweating, man.
983
00:41:39.670 --> 00:41:40.449
Oh, my God.
984
00:41:40.530 --> 00:41:42.670
She actually went on stage giggling.
985
00:41:43.800 --> 00:41:44.320
Oh, wow.
986
00:41:44.460 --> 00:41:46.780
Actually, we were on stage giggling. So she was a
987
00:41:46.800 --> 00:41:50.079
lot of fun. And she came to Nando's with us
988
00:41:50.119 --> 00:41:53.179
a few times. Turns out her favorite drink is Red
989
00:41:53.199 --> 00:41:53.860
Bull and vodka.
990
00:41:53.880 --> 00:41:56.739
I know.
991
00:41:56.960 --> 00:41:59.099
Awesome. So the story you wanted me to tell, the
992
00:41:59.119 --> 00:42:01.199
story you wanted me to tell, she invited me to
993
00:42:01.900 --> 00:42:05.159
lunch with her and her assistant in between shows. And
994
00:42:05.179 --> 00:42:08.570
she said, we found this great French restaurant in Wimbledon Village.
995
00:42:09.030 --> 00:42:11.230
And she said, I just love it. The ambiance, it's
996
00:42:11.269 --> 00:42:14.699
just genuine French. It's so good. So we get in
997
00:42:14.719 --> 00:42:21.650
the car and we rock up to Cafe Rouge. And
998
00:42:21.710 --> 00:42:23.369
I'm kind of getting out of the car thinking, oh,
999
00:42:23.750 --> 00:42:31.500
I can't believe this. And we sit down and I
1000
00:42:31.579 --> 00:42:33.659
say to her, what is it about this place that
1001
00:42:33.679 --> 00:42:34.260
you really like?
1002
00:42:34.380 --> 00:42:35.639
She said, it's just.
1003
00:42:35.860 --> 00:42:39.409
So authentically French. And she said, you know, we ate
1004
00:42:39.429 --> 00:42:42.010
here the other day and I had quite an incredible
1005
00:42:42.070 --> 00:42:46.429
beef bourgeon. And I'm staring out the window at the
1006
00:42:46.449 --> 00:42:49.449
Carluccio's across the road thinking, why couldn't she have gone there?
1007
00:42:51.179 --> 00:42:53.739
And so we eat the meal. And I didn't want
1008
00:42:53.780 --> 00:42:56.599
to be the guy who popped the bubble about it
1009
00:42:56.659 --> 00:42:58.530
because she was genuinely delighted about it.
1010
00:42:58.559 --> 00:43:00.539
You can't in that situation. You can't.
1011
00:43:00.780 --> 00:43:10.909
She was dropping French to the waiter. What? And we
1012
00:43:10.929 --> 00:43:14.110
get back to the theatre and, you know, I said,
1013
00:43:14.150 --> 00:43:16.809
thanks for lunch. And she was like, oh, that's great.
1014
00:43:16.829 --> 00:43:18.449
We should go back. We should take some other people
1015
00:43:18.489 --> 00:43:21.670
back there. I'm sure they'd love it. And she said,
1016
00:43:21.710 --> 00:43:24.349
it looks, you know, maybe if we take a big
1017
00:43:24.389 --> 00:43:26.360
group of us there, though, you know, as it's an
1018
00:43:26.400 --> 00:43:29.679
independent restaurant, they would really. And it was at that
1019
00:43:29.719 --> 00:43:33.880
point I said to her, look, Priscilla, it's a chain restaurant.
1020
00:43:33.900 --> 00:43:36.940
There's loads of them. And she said. I don't believe you.
1021
00:43:37.159 --> 00:43:39.800
I don't believe you. And then I just dropped it.
1022
00:43:39.940 --> 00:43:42.739
I dropped it. And then probably three weeks later, we
1023
00:43:42.780 --> 00:43:44.559
were standing in the wings about to go on stage.
1024
00:43:45.559 --> 00:43:49.139
And she hears her queue line and then just turns
1025
00:43:49.179 --> 00:43:51.219
and looks at me and she says, Café Rouge is
1026
00:43:51.260 --> 00:43:54.909
a chain restaurant. I'm so disappointed. And then walks on
1027
00:43:54.949 --> 00:43:56.070
stage and does the scene.
1028
00:43:58.070 --> 00:44:02.969
LAUGHTER That's it for this special Best Of episode. We'll
1029
00:44:03.010 --> 00:44:03.710
be back next week.
1030
00:44:03.889 --> 00:44:09.369
MUSIC Josh, you fancy going for a beer?
1031
00:44:09.530 --> 00:44:11.110
Maybe like the 14th of April?
1032
00:44:11.590 --> 00:44:13.050
Can't do the 14th of April, Rob.
1033
00:44:13.369 --> 00:44:14.110
How come it comes?
1034
00:44:14.530 --> 00:44:17.550
We're doing the Parenting Hell Arena Tour at Manchester Arena.
1035
00:44:17.989 --> 00:44:18.530
Oh, okay, yeah.
1036
00:44:18.590 --> 00:44:20.050
How about the 19th of April?
1037
00:44:20.369 --> 00:44:21.250
Oh, no, I can't do that.
1038
00:44:21.269 --> 00:44:23.949
I'll be doing the Parenting Hell Live Tour in Nottingham.
1039
00:44:24.050 --> 00:44:25.469
What about the 20th of April?
1040
00:44:25.550 --> 00:44:29.460
Cardiff Arena, Parenting Hell Live, Cardiff Arena.
1041
00:44:29.639 --> 00:44:29.739
21st?
1042
00:44:29.860 --> 00:44:32.019
23rd of April? No, I can't do that either.
1043
00:44:32.360 --> 00:44:32.750
London O2.
1044
00:44:32.780 --> 00:44:33.219
23rd of April?
1045
00:44:35.760 --> 00:44:39.820
I can do the 22nd. We've got a day off. 23rd, yes, yes, Wembley.
1046
00:44:39.960 --> 00:44:41.460
What about the 28th of April?
1047
00:44:41.719 --> 00:44:43.420
I'm in Birmingham. Do you know what, Rob?
1048
00:44:43.440 --> 00:44:44.260
Parenting Hell live tour.
1049
00:44:44.280 --> 00:44:46.199
Yeah, but we'll just have a drink afterwards.
1050
00:44:46.480 --> 00:44:47.340
Yeah, shall we do that?
1051
00:44:47.639 --> 00:44:48.400
Yeah, that'd be nice.
1052
00:44:48.420 --> 00:44:50.039
We need to plug the live tour, by the way.
1053
00:44:50.159 --> 00:44:50.639
Oh, yeah, yeah.
1054
00:44:50.739 --> 00:44:53.519
There's a live tour of Parenting Hell, and I cannot wait.
1055
00:44:53.619 --> 00:44:57.219
It's genuinely going to be an absolute thrill to do.
1056
00:44:57.519 --> 00:44:59.380
And do you know what it would make? A perfect
1057
00:44:59.440 --> 00:45:00.860
Christmas present. Two of those tickets.
1058
00:45:00.880 --> 00:45:00.980
Ooh.
1059
00:45:01.670 --> 00:45:04.349
Oh, great Christmas present. Or Father's Day present or Mother's
1060
00:45:04.369 --> 00:45:04.809
Day present.
1061
00:45:04.929 --> 00:45:05.289
Exactly.
1062
00:45:05.550 --> 00:45:05.989
See you there.
1063
00:45:07.239 --> 00:45:08.400
Hello, Tom Allen here.
1064
00:45:08.699 --> 00:45:09.679
And Susie Ruffell.
1065
00:45:09.960 --> 00:45:12.940
We have a podcast called Like-Minded Friends. It's very much
1066
00:45:12.980 --> 00:45:15.280
a celebration of, I don't know, what would you say, Suze,
1067
00:45:15.300 --> 00:45:15.880
being queer?
1068
00:45:16.099 --> 00:45:17.199
Being queer, but also chit-chat.
1069
00:45:17.219 --> 00:45:19.079
There's loads of straight people that love it, so I.
1070
00:45:19.059 --> 00:45:20.320
Think that you should come along and listen to it.
1071
00:45:20.480 --> 00:45:23.130
There's something for everybody. It's been described as white noise
1072
00:45:23.150 --> 00:45:25.730
for gays, but also we had a lovely section about
1073
00:45:25.769 --> 00:45:26.449
Glade Plugins.
1074
00:45:28.210 --> 00:45:29.019
So why don't you listen to it?
1075
00:45:29.329 --> 00:45:31.739
Search Like-Minded Friends wherever you get your podcasts.
1076
00:45:31.760 --> 00:45:33.219
That sounded quite professional.
1077
00:45:33.239 --> 00:45:33.519
Didn't it?
1078
00:45:33.820 --> 00:45:33.889
Mmm.
1079
00:45:35.260 --> 00:45:37.280
If you are not in the queue and you are waiting,
1080
00:45:37.320 --> 00:45:38.980
then step to the side.
1081
00:45:39.000 --> 00:45:39.519
He got in touch.
1082
00:45:39.539 --> 00:45:41.480
He said, yeah, sorry, mate, you didn't seem like yourself
1083
00:45:41.519 --> 00:45:43.579
the other day. You've only met me three times.
1084
00:45:43.619 --> 00:45:46.280
The self-service checkout. I don't care what you're called.
1085
00:45:46.519 --> 00:45:48.719
I'm not getting tricked into working here.
1086
00:45:48.760 --> 00:45:51.829
People at festivals in those stupid jester hats.
1087
00:45:51.929 --> 00:45:54.130
I glanced at a tampon.
1088
00:45:54.130 --> 00:45:56.329
£ 2. 69 for a bottle of water. Why is your Wi-Fi
1089
00:45:56.369 --> 00:46:00.969
code 10 characters long? I don't care if you're watching
1090
00:46:01.010 --> 00:46:03.050
Boost Cut Jeans.
1091
00:46:03.369 --> 00:46:04.389
What's upset you now?
1092
00:46:05.309 --> 00:46:06.030
I'm Sean Walsh.
1093
00:46:06.269 --> 00:46:08.809
And I'm Paul McCaffrey. We are the hosts of What's
1094
00:46:09.050 --> 00:46:10.070
Upset You Now?
1095
00:46:10.230 --> 00:46:12.380
The UK's angriest podcast.
1096
00:46:12.440 --> 00:46:15.119
And we are back for Series 5.
1097
00:46:15.119 --> 00:46:15.880
Booyah!
1098
00:46:16.119 --> 00:46:17.539
We all love a good moan, don't we?
1099
00:46:17.679 --> 00:46:20.059
And Sean and I, well, Sean mostly, are two of
1100
00:46:20.099 --> 00:46:23.739
the best in the absolute business. And every Tuesday and Thursday...
1101
00:46:23.739 --> 00:46:27.110
We moan about all those little things that really get
1102
00:46:27.250 --> 00:46:27.630
our goat.
1103
00:46:27.730 --> 00:46:30.030
We also have guests. What guests have we had, Sean?
1104
00:46:30.050 --> 00:46:33.969
We have had Romesh Ranganathan, Rob Beckett, Mark Lamar, Joe Brand,
1105
00:46:34.070 --> 00:46:35.070
Catherine Ryan.
1106
00:46:35.130 --> 00:46:35.829
Tom Allen.
1107
00:46:35.849 --> 00:46:40.320
15-minute episodes every Tuesday and Thursday. Brand new What's Up
1108
00:46:40.360 --> 00:46:43.039
Set You Now Series 5, out now.
1109
00:46:43.260 --> 00:46:44.219
Oh, for God's sake.
1110
00:46:44.739 --> 00:46:47.500
Soap from the Box is the TV podcast that goes
1111
00:46:47.559 --> 00:46:52.219
behind the scenes of the nation's favourite shows, including Coronation Street, Emmerdale,
1112
00:46:52.260 --> 00:46:53.880
Hollyoaks and EastEnders.
1113
00:46:54.199 --> 00:46:56.679
You know, it was literally, we couldn't sort of go
1114
00:46:56.739 --> 00:46:59.320
anywhere without being recognised.
1115
00:46:59.599 --> 00:47:02.340
I'm Lee Salisbury and I directed the shows and the
1116
00:47:02.400 --> 00:47:05.619
stars in them. On this podcast, I delve where no
1117
00:47:05.699 --> 00:47:07.960
one else has been. You can listen to over 70
1118
00:47:07.960 --> 00:47:12.280
episodes right now with stars including Sue Johnston, Glynis Barber,
1119
00:47:12.539 --> 00:47:15.840
Denise Welsh, Sid Owen, Sally Dynevor and Danny Minogue.
1120
00:47:16.420 --> 00:47:18.179
No more, no more.
1121
00:47:18.420 --> 00:47:20.639
In this week's episode, I chat to the star of
1122
00:47:20.699 --> 00:47:22.519
one of the biggest Christmas films.
1123
00:47:22.260 --> 00:47:23.159
Of all time.
1124
00:47:23.360 --> 00:47:25.219
Hi, I'm Martine McCutcheon.
1125
00:47:25.280 --> 00:47:26.219
Yes, love actually.
1126
00:47:26.320 --> 00:47:30.309
And EastEnders actress Martine McCutcheon goes behind the scenes with me,
1127
00:47:30.690 --> 00:47:31.710
especially for you.
1128
00:47:32.219 --> 00:47:35.519
It's such a beautiful thing, like, to be part.
1129
00:47:35.260 --> 00:47:36.659
Of your legacy, to leave behind.
1130
00:47:36.900 --> 00:47:40.190
Soap from the Box, the TV podcast you don't want
1131
00:47:40.210 --> 00:47:40.570
to miss.