Mayor McPlease

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Learners' Permit
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Learners' Permit
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Learners' Permit
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Learners' Permit
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Learners' Permit
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Learners' Permit
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Learners' Permit
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Hello and welcome to the Learners Permit Podcast, a show where four friends lock themselves
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in a room and forcefully educate each other on the topics they're most passionate about.
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Each week, one host selects a subject to educate the other three about in hopes of broadening
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their willfully narrow horizons.
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Or sometimes they just all suffer from the holiday sleepies and forget the format.
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I'm your host Liam.
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This week is Christmas.
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I am here with two of my favorite co-hosts.
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I won't tell you which ones.
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My name's Adam.
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I'm Cody.
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We're the two favorites.
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Yeah.
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That's true.
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You are two of my favorites for sure.
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Where do you think the other one's at?
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Sucking his thumb.
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Oh, bold, bold assumption from Monsieur Adam over there.
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What did you say?
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Sucking his thumb.
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Sorry, you just had a little lapse of baby speak there, Cody.
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I'm a little...
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Is that what it was?
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No, it was not baby speech.
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It was me saying Monsieur Adam over there.
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How would you describe that if not baby speak?
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Accent, not baby speak.
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What kind of accent?
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Be very careful now, Cody.
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Oh, French.
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I didn't know you spoke French, Cody.
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That's wonderful.
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Don't you?
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You know the French are terribly snobby about accents.
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Yes, I have heard that.
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If you don't get it right, they will chew your shit out is what they'll do.
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And they're French.
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They do stuff like that.
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They do do that.
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Yeah.
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They don't wear deodorant and they do toss salad.
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Can you speak for our experience?
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Yeah.
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Next week is Christmas.
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I've never met a French person and God help me if I ever do.
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You've never met a French person?
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Never not once in a life.
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How is that possible?
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What do you mean?
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What the fuck?
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We don't live in France, Adam.
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What are you talking about?
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How is that possible?
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I've never been to France.
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Some of us aren't as privileged as you.
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We don't get to just jet across the entire world and go to every European country each
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time we summer with the family.
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I don't even have a passport.
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Yeah, I know you don't because you don't need one with the private jet that your family
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has.
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I think we're honing into something with Liam, Adam.
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What's that?
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I think he just has a disdain for Europe.
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That's not true.
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I like plenty of European countries.
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Okay.
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One of the first things you said.
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Fun path for you to go down, but I don't like the British, but I'm just stating truth about
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the French.
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I'm not saying that I.
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You called the people from Turkey assholes.
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When did I call the people from Turkey assholes?
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I don't remember that.
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I don't think you have the receipts for that, so I don't believe you.
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And you're certainly not going to edit this episode, so you certainly can't edit that
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in right here right after I say that I didn't say it because I didn't.
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But anyway, yeah, it's Christmas time, like I've tried to say three times now, and we
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are going to be celebrating Christmas very, very soon.
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So what did you guys get me for Christmas?
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I got you another year of friendship.
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I was going to say unconditional love and friendship.
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Well, first of all, I thought I already had that from both of you.
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Second of all, Cody, you're kind of implying that you have some kind of tiered subscription
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service for being friends with you.
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You don't have that with your friends?
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You charge all your friends money to friends with you charge them anything.
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So you just renew the contract every Christmas.
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Yeah, you review, make sure the terms are acceptable on your end and then you renew
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it.
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So I got another naughty and nice list and I figure out if not there, but like, you know,
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the naughty and nice list.
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I decided if they're viable for a re-up and Cody, are you Santa Claus?
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Am I Santa Claus?
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It was my understanding that all there was only one man with access to the definitive
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naughty and nice list.
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Yeah.
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And that's and that's you.
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You're telling me?
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No, no, no, no, no.
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I just I just know a guy that helps me find the list.
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His name is Redacted and he sleeps.
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He sleeps.
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He sneaks me in and we he's we drink some eggnog and I read the list.
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Was that a Freudian slip?
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He sleeps you in.
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He sleeps.
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He sleeps me in.
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Well, I know only one guy who sleeps you and that will be Austin, our missing co-host.
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So is Austin the guy that sneaks you into the North Pole to read the naughty list?
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Redacted.
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Redacted.
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Could you see why don't you say the name and you just bleep it out?
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For anyone listening, Cody just made a weird noise with his mouth.
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He didn't actually say a name.
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So I'm starting to think that Cody doesn't actually have access to a naughty or nice
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list.
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I have I have I have my ways.
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It almost seems like you are you're operating within a system of capital where you're just
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deciding on a whim whether it benefits you or not to be friends with people every Christmas,
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which is fine.
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I mean, no, no, I I choose every day to be friends with my friends.
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What if you decide you want to be friends with them anymore?
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Well, then I don't.
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It's very simple, very quick.
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There it is.
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But I don't do it as a ritual on Christmas.
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And I also don't don't bear to say that my gift to you is friendship, because by the
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very fact that I could possibly be giving you a gift, friendship is a precedent that
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has to be set.
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Adam, what are you getting them?
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I. Well, hold on.
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So what is the precedent that's been set thus far?
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Well, I would call you guys my friends.
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Yeah, you're still my friend.
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At the very least, acquaintances and coworkers.
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All right, I can live with it.
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Well, if if Christmas is still a week out, why am I telling you what I got you?
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That's true.
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That's true.
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I guess you shouldn't tell me.
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Did you get me something, though?
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What?
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You got me something?
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Yeah.
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I get all my close friends things.
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That sounds like a no to me.
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And that's OK.
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I'll move on.
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So it's not awkward.
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It wasn't a no.
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I got something for everybody, except I returned my gift for Austin because as our astute listeners
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who were here for last week's episode know, Austin has failed to deliver on a cute mascot
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for our show.
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Unfortunately, we have no mascot and therefore we have no hope for success in this world.
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We will all die miserable failures in a puddle of our own urine, our own shared urine, all
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because Austin didn't make a cute mascot for us.
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Our collective piss pool.
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Definitely are not recording two episodes back to back.
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And he definitely missed yet another week with this.
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Nope, we are not recording two episodes back to back.
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And even if we were, I would feel confident saying that he still has not turned in the
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drawing of the cute mascot character.
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And so help me God strike me down, smite me if I am incorrect.
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If there is a cute mascot character on the art of this episode, I am dead.
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And this show now has three hosts.
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Wow.
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Strong words.
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Well, he's still here, so we don't have to worry about finding that's true.
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And like I said, that was an if which we are not recording two episodes back to back.
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Christmas is in one week.
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And that is the real date of today, December 19th, 2024.
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That is the day that it is.
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Yes, it is.
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It is 3 a.m. December 19th, 2024.
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Unequivocally, irrefutably.
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Absolutely.
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What did you get me for Christmas?
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Oh, yeah.
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Oh, I can't tell you, Adam, but I did get you something.
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I did get you something.
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And I got Cody something, too.
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Yeah, I think I know what it is.
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I got Cody something.
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I got you something.
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I got Austin something.
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I got you a manager something just because of all of the wonderful service that she has
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given to the show.
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Does this have anything to do with the contracts needing to be renewed?
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Is there some ulterior motive here?
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Absolutely not.
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I think when we do our contract for dual, there will probably be some changes to the
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format of the show.
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Yeah, probably.
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Yeah.
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But we shouldn't have to pay as much rent.
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We've been not recording at the studio.
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Yeah.
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I mean, you're the one paying rent and you're also the one that makes money off of this.
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I don't feel so bad about it.
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No, guys.
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OK, sorry, IRS.
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Cody makes no money off this show.
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Fuck the IRS.
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You know what is taking advantage of our rent, though?
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A snazzy new vending machine purchased by Mr. Cody.
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Oh, yes, that's true.
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Christmas gifts, Christmas miracles come in all shapes and sizes, and this one just happens
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to be vending machine shaped.
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Yeah, I did.
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What is on the front of your vending machine, Cody?
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Would you like to tell our audience?
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The young and supple subalba from Star Wars Episode One, the Phantom Menace.
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And then Luke Skywalker as a child, Anakin Skywalker as a child.
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Whoa, whoa.
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Me.
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What the fuck?
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Wake up, buddy.
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I know.
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Sleepy Cody over here.
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Give yourself a good slap on the face.
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Let's hear it in the microphone.
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Ready?
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Didn't pick it up.
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We didn't.
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We didn't.
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It picked up on my mic.
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Very good.
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If it's not loud enough, just insert some kind of sound effect.
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Yeah, that sounds about right.
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Yeah, so I picked that up a couple of weeks ago at this point.
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Actually, like a month ago at this point.
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And yeah, no, it's beautiful.
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It's heavy.
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You guys know how fucking heavy they are?
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I hear Austin let out a girlish scream when he shot.
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Did he?
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It was a giddy yelp.
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It was.
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It was.
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I was on Facebook Marketplace for too long and I couldn't let the opportunity pass.
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What did you snag it for, if you don't mind me asking?
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It was listed for $500.
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$1,000 is what Cody snagged it for.
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No.
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It was listed for 500 buckaroos and I got it for a sweet deal of $350.
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That's $350,000.
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No.
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I don't have Adam's family's money.
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He said, good sir, I cannot in good conscience take this off your hands without paying the
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proper value.
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I can't take credit for Adam's family's money.
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I had to work hard for this podcast.
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I had to take all the money that I could to afford that.
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But yeah, no.
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00:10:57,080 --> 00:10:59,480
This is a blue collar podcast.
263
00:10:59,480 --> 00:11:00,480
It is a-
264
00:11:00,480 --> 00:11:01,480
Real grassroots.
265
00:11:01,480 --> 00:11:02,480
... color podcast.
266
00:11:02,480 --> 00:11:03,480
Yeah.
267
00:11:03,480 --> 00:11:07,560
What do you guys... I have 10 slots for the vending machine.
268
00:11:07,560 --> 00:11:10,240
How much does each slot hold?
269
00:11:10,240 --> 00:11:15,440
Cody neither knows the capacity nor the mechanisms within the machine that he has bought.
270
00:11:15,440 --> 00:11:16,440
Those are all to be determined.
271
00:11:16,440 --> 00:11:19,680
However, there are 10 different sodas or drinks that could be put in there.
272
00:11:19,680 --> 00:11:23,800
I think one has to be chocolate milk.
273
00:11:23,800 --> 00:11:26,600
I think you got a vending machine, you got to have a chocolate milk.
274
00:11:26,600 --> 00:11:27,600
I'm sorry.
275
00:11:27,600 --> 00:11:29,880
It could be non-dairy chocolate milk if that's your preference.
276
00:11:29,880 --> 00:11:34,440
Do you get the canned Yoohoo so it doesn't expire?
277
00:11:34,440 --> 00:11:35,440
No.
278
00:11:35,440 --> 00:11:36,440
It can expire.
279
00:11:36,440 --> 00:11:37,440
No.
280
00:11:37,440 --> 00:11:40,840
You get chocolate milk with an expiration date.
281
00:11:40,840 --> 00:11:43,760
Chocolate milk with an expiration date or just loose chocolate milk.
282
00:11:43,760 --> 00:11:46,080
Just fill that one with just loose chocolate milk.
283
00:11:46,080 --> 00:11:47,720
It won't hold.
284
00:11:47,720 --> 00:11:50,600
It's not like... I think you got ripped off on the vending machine
285
00:11:50,600 --> 00:11:51,600
then.
286
00:11:51,600 --> 00:11:52,600
No.
287
00:11:52,600 --> 00:11:53,600
It's not like a sealed thing.
288
00:11:53,600 --> 00:11:56,240
It's like they have compartments for it.
289
00:11:56,240 --> 00:11:57,240
Okay.
290
00:11:57,240 --> 00:11:59,760
So chocolate milk bottles with expiration dates.
291
00:11:59,760 --> 00:12:00,760
That's what's got to go in one.
292
00:12:00,760 --> 00:12:05,800
You know what I think would be a really... That's Liam's... That's all he gets.
293
00:12:05,800 --> 00:12:07,600
No, hold up, no there's 10 slots.
294
00:12:07,600 --> 00:12:08,600
No, you get one.
295
00:12:08,600 --> 00:12:09,600
You asked for our opinion.
296
00:12:09,600 --> 00:12:10,600
No, you get one.
297
00:12:10,600 --> 00:12:11,600
You get one.
298
00:12:11,600 --> 00:12:14,560
Okay, but you can't change out the chocolate milk after it expires.
299
00:12:14,560 --> 00:12:18,520
If that's my one, you have to leave the chocolate milk in there after it's expired.
300
00:12:18,520 --> 00:12:21,320
I'll vend it and then throw it.
301
00:12:21,320 --> 00:12:22,320
What do you mean you'll vend it?
302
00:12:22,320 --> 00:12:24,600
I'll vend it and throw it at the church across the street.
303
00:12:24,600 --> 00:12:28,920
Adam, what do you... I think there should be a roulette slot where...
304
00:12:28,920 --> 00:12:33,520
See, the studio manager also said that.
305
00:12:33,520 --> 00:12:34,520
I disagree.
306
00:12:34,520 --> 00:12:38,480
It would be really fun if you had different beers or something or different alcoholic
307
00:12:38,480 --> 00:12:40,040
beverages in there.
308
00:12:40,040 --> 00:12:41,040
Yes.
309
00:12:41,040 --> 00:12:42,040
Yes.
310
00:12:42,040 --> 00:12:45,560
See, Liam, you got to think outside of the box.
311
00:12:45,560 --> 00:12:46,560
I don't think that's fun.
312
00:12:46,560 --> 00:12:48,680
I don't think roulette is fun.
313
00:12:48,680 --> 00:12:50,320
I think roulette's a great idea.
314
00:12:50,320 --> 00:12:51,320
It's like reject beers.
315
00:12:51,320 --> 00:12:56,360
I think it's fun if you do roulette with everything, but it's all consistent.
316
00:12:56,360 --> 00:13:02,040
So you have 10 options that are all the same except for every drink in there, every third
317
00:13:02,040 --> 00:13:06,680
or fourth drink depending is shaken up really hard so that when you open it, it explodes
318
00:13:06,680 --> 00:13:07,680
on you.
319
00:13:07,680 --> 00:13:09,080
I think that's the type of roulette you need.
320
00:13:09,080 --> 00:13:11,080
That's not how a vending machine works.
321
00:13:11,080 --> 00:13:15,400
No, you'd have to put in the work of shaking the drinks up before you put them in there.
322
00:13:15,400 --> 00:13:18,280
It's being stored in there, Liam.
323
00:13:18,280 --> 00:13:19,280
Yeah.
324
00:13:19,280 --> 00:13:23,880
Do you not know... Much like the moon with me, do you not know how a vending machine
325
00:13:23,880 --> 00:13:24,880
works?
326
00:13:24,880 --> 00:13:27,800
I actually don't, but I'm assuming that you could always open up the vending machine and
327
00:13:27,800 --> 00:13:29,960
reshake them if there's some issue with them becoming unphysi.
328
00:13:29,960 --> 00:13:32,320
Then you'd know which one you're getting.
329
00:13:32,320 --> 00:13:35,840
Well, you would as the owner of the vending machine, but I think that's also true if you
330
00:13:35,840 --> 00:13:40,240
were to load up the random roulette wheel.
331
00:13:40,240 --> 00:13:44,920
I could just go into the fridge, shake a beer and give it to you.
332
00:13:44,920 --> 00:13:48,280
You could do that with any drink that you would put in the vending machine as well.
333
00:13:48,280 --> 00:13:50,520
Yeah, but then I don't have to open the vending machine.
334
00:13:50,520 --> 00:13:53,320
Owning the vending machine is arbitrary to begin with, Cody.
335
00:13:53,320 --> 00:13:55,680
You can't be like, you're adding extra steps.
336
00:13:55,680 --> 00:14:00,040
You're making it way more difficult than it needs to be.
337
00:14:00,040 --> 00:14:01,040
No, I'm not.
338
00:14:01,040 --> 00:14:02,880
I'm just saying shake them before you put them in there.
339
00:14:02,880 --> 00:14:07,640
Then every third or whatever, however many, every random one will explode on you.
340
00:14:07,640 --> 00:14:08,640
Well, hold on, Cody.
341
00:14:08,640 --> 00:14:09,640
That's the roulette that would be fine.
342
00:14:09,640 --> 00:14:12,320
Cody, you need to do repairs on this machine to get it functional anyway, right?
343
00:14:12,320 --> 00:14:13,320
I do.
344
00:14:13,320 --> 00:14:14,320
That's true.
345
00:14:14,320 --> 00:14:15,320
It's not even functional at the moment.
346
00:14:15,320 --> 00:14:19,480
It doesn't even have a... What if you jerry-rig a shaking mechanism into the machine?
347
00:14:19,480 --> 00:14:21,360
Oh, my God.
348
00:14:21,360 --> 00:14:24,160
Get a fucking shake wheel, like actuator.
349
00:14:24,160 --> 00:14:25,920
Kind of like spring or something.
350
00:14:25,920 --> 00:14:26,920
Yeah.
351
00:14:26,920 --> 00:14:33,920
Speaking of vending machines and sodas, Liam, is it time for another soda report?
352
00:14:33,920 --> 00:14:38,000
Is it time for another edition of the soda report?
353
00:14:38,000 --> 00:14:39,000
Yes.
354
00:14:39,000 --> 00:14:40,000
I do think so.
355
00:14:40,000 --> 00:14:41,360
You do think so.
356
00:14:41,360 --> 00:14:46,240
This could inform what goes into the machine, so welcome once again, listener, to the soda
357
00:14:46,240 --> 00:14:54,920
report.
358
00:14:54,920 --> 00:15:16,840
Thank you, Adam.
359
00:15:16,840 --> 00:15:19,680
That's beautiful.
360
00:15:19,680 --> 00:15:21,880
If you could make that real, that'd be wonderful.
361
00:15:21,880 --> 00:15:26,760
The soda report is the decisive and definitive final verdict on all the pertinent pops of
362
00:15:26,760 --> 00:15:27,960
today.
363
00:15:27,960 --> 00:15:33,520
After one sip, I will render my rating within a complex three-point scale.
364
00:15:33,520 --> 00:15:37,960
This week, we have an exciting new drink that some of our listeners are most likely familiar
365
00:15:37,960 --> 00:15:42,000
with, and that is regular ass Mountain Dew.
366
00:15:42,000 --> 00:15:47,080
I will now take my sip and do my contractually obligated gargle for Adam.
367
00:15:47,080 --> 00:15:48,080
Liam, wait.
368
00:15:48,080 --> 00:15:49,080
What, Cody?
369
00:15:49,080 --> 00:15:50,680
Your balls are going to shrink.
370
00:15:50,680 --> 00:15:53,920
That's another five seconds off of your rant time, Cody.
371
00:15:53,920 --> 00:15:54,920
No, no, what?
372
00:15:54,920 --> 00:15:56,600
You are disrupting the soda report.
373
00:15:56,600 --> 00:15:57,600
This is tantamount to treason.
374
00:15:57,600 --> 00:16:00,120
I'm worried about your health.
375
00:16:00,120 --> 00:16:04,480
Cody, my balls are massive, and we'll talk about that once I'm done here, but I am now
376
00:16:04,480 --> 00:16:09,080
going to crack the soda and take a sip.
377
00:16:09,080 --> 00:16:24,080
That was way more frothy.
378
00:16:24,080 --> 00:16:31,320
That was frothy.
379
00:16:31,320 --> 00:16:34,840
Distinct taste of chemicals.
380
00:16:34,840 --> 00:16:36,680
Certainly.
381
00:16:36,680 --> 00:16:41,560
I can taste the dye.
382
00:16:41,560 --> 00:16:45,480
I'm going to have to go ahead and give that a solid two out of three.
383
00:16:45,480 --> 00:16:48,240
That is quite all right.
384
00:16:48,240 --> 00:16:50,240
Mountain Dew, quite all right.
385
00:16:50,240 --> 00:16:51,240
That was the soda report.
386
00:16:51,240 --> 00:17:04,760
Thank you.
387
00:17:04,760 --> 00:17:11,520
So Cody, I'm sure it will be edited out by the polite young man who is going to edit
388
00:17:11,520 --> 00:17:18,960
this, but you did interrupt the soda report to comment on how Mountain Dew can chemically
389
00:17:18,960 --> 00:17:21,200
alter your testicles.
390
00:17:21,200 --> 00:17:26,400
I did just measure there has been a two millimeter reduction, but that is okay because my testicles
391
00:17:26,400 --> 00:17:29,400
are the size of grapefruits.
392
00:17:29,400 --> 00:17:35,160
That being said, I did recently watch a movie where there was representation for people
393
00:17:35,160 --> 00:17:36,160
like me.
394
00:17:36,160 --> 00:17:37,960
With elephantitis?
395
00:17:37,960 --> 00:17:39,160
Perhaps.
396
00:17:39,160 --> 00:17:40,640
I've never talked to a doctor about it.
397
00:17:40,640 --> 00:17:42,680
I'm too bashful and embarrassed.
398
00:17:42,680 --> 00:17:47,520
Wouldn't they know when they make you turn and cough?
399
00:17:47,520 --> 00:17:48,520
No.
400
00:17:48,520 --> 00:17:52,800
Every time that happens, I turn and then the guy gets knocked out.
401
00:17:52,800 --> 00:17:59,000
But what I was going to say is that I watched a movie recently where the main character
402
00:17:59,000 --> 00:18:00,920
had massive nuts.
403
00:18:00,920 --> 00:18:04,200
Just massive, just huge nuts.
404
00:18:04,200 --> 00:18:07,120
Just humongous, ginormous, gonzo nuts.
405
00:18:07,120 --> 00:18:10,600
Have you ever seen any of the movies by Ari Aster?
406
00:18:10,600 --> 00:18:11,600
Who?
407
00:18:11,600 --> 00:18:12,600
Ari Aster.
408
00:18:12,600 --> 00:18:18,480
He directed Hereditary and Midsommar or Midsommar, however you pronounce it.
409
00:18:18,480 --> 00:18:21,800
And then he also directed a movie called Bo's Afraid, which is three hours long.
410
00:18:21,800 --> 00:18:24,520
And I had to watch it in pieces because it's long.
411
00:18:24,520 --> 00:18:27,520
I have not.
412
00:18:27,520 --> 00:18:31,640
It's a great comedy about a guy who loses his keys, but he's got really, really big
413
00:18:31,640 --> 00:18:34,240
testicles in the movie.
414
00:18:34,240 --> 00:18:35,480
So big, like crazy big.
415
00:18:35,480 --> 00:18:38,040
Is there a plot reason for that?
416
00:18:38,040 --> 00:18:39,400
Uh, yes.
417
00:18:39,400 --> 00:18:40,480
Maybe.
418
00:18:40,480 --> 00:18:41,480
I don't know.
419
00:18:41,480 --> 00:18:42,480
I couldn't tell you.
420
00:18:42,480 --> 00:18:44,480
I lost track.
421
00:18:44,480 --> 00:18:45,480
But probably.
422
00:18:45,480 --> 00:18:47,160
He's got massive nuts.
423
00:18:47,160 --> 00:18:49,320
Those movies have been on my radar for a minute.
424
00:18:49,320 --> 00:18:51,440
I've been meaning to get to those.
425
00:18:51,440 --> 00:18:53,280
Where it's a little.
426
00:18:53,280 --> 00:18:54,280
Yeah.
427
00:18:54,280 --> 00:18:58,080
I mean, he's probably got massive nuts because his father is a giant penis.
428
00:18:58,080 --> 00:19:00,080
But that translates.
429
00:19:00,080 --> 00:19:03,440
Yeah, it does.
430
00:19:03,440 --> 00:19:06,720
But you know, you know, it's hereditary.
431
00:19:06,720 --> 00:19:07,720
It is.
432
00:19:07,720 --> 00:19:08,720
There you go.
433
00:19:08,720 --> 00:19:10,720
Oh, connections.
434
00:19:10,720 --> 00:19:12,340
Wow.
435
00:19:12,340 --> 00:19:13,760
Can you believe it?
436
00:19:13,760 --> 00:19:17,320
Freaking from Ari Aster expanded universe from the top.
437
00:19:17,320 --> 00:19:19,280
Yeah, that's really good.
438
00:19:19,280 --> 00:19:27,040
I kind of feel like when I'm drinking Mountain Dew, I can taste that it's like the most bad
439
00:19:27,040 --> 00:19:28,040
for me.
440
00:19:28,040 --> 00:19:30,880
So to really, I what makes you say that?
441
00:19:30,880 --> 00:19:33,440
I don't know what it is in particular.
442
00:19:33,440 --> 00:19:34,800
Like I don't know.
443
00:19:34,800 --> 00:19:42,160
I feel like Mountain Dew has like a syrup enos to it that is more noticeable than other
444
00:19:42,160 --> 00:19:43,760
sodas.
445
00:19:43,760 --> 00:19:44,760
I disagree.
446
00:19:44,760 --> 00:19:45,760
Really?
447
00:19:45,760 --> 00:19:46,920
I disagree hard.
448
00:19:46,920 --> 00:19:48,320
Like I don't know why.
449
00:19:48,320 --> 00:19:52,160
Like I can drink a Coke or a Pepsi or Dr. Pepper or Sprite.
450
00:19:52,160 --> 00:19:54,400
I think Dr. Pepper is the one for me.
451
00:19:54,400 --> 00:19:56,440
But like when I just.
452
00:19:56,440 --> 00:19:59,320
I'm sorry, guys, we're going to have to cut this entire bit.
453
00:19:59,320 --> 00:20:01,640
We can't we can't talk about this stuff.
454
00:20:01,640 --> 00:20:04,720
The verdict has been given for both of these things in the Soda Report.
455
00:20:04,720 --> 00:20:05,720
That's fine.
456
00:20:05,720 --> 00:20:07,160
We're not we're not sorry.
457
00:20:07,160 --> 00:20:08,160
Asking to change the verdict.
458
00:20:08,160 --> 00:20:09,160
Yeah, you're both.
459
00:20:09,160 --> 00:20:10,160
No, no, no.
460
00:20:10,160 --> 00:20:11,840
You're being I'm sorry.
461
00:20:11,840 --> 00:20:12,840
I'm sorry.
462
00:20:12,840 --> 00:20:14,880
You need to respect the sanctity of the Soda Report.
463
00:20:14,880 --> 00:20:15,880
All right.
464
00:20:15,880 --> 00:20:19,600
So you're going to have to do this for my segment.
465
00:20:19,600 --> 00:20:21,480
And you're down to 20 seconds now.
466
00:20:21,480 --> 00:20:22,480
Yeah.
467
00:20:22,480 --> 00:20:23,920
And what is your segment called, Cody?
468
00:20:23,920 --> 00:20:24,920
Fuck.
469
00:20:24,920 --> 00:20:25,920
What was it called again?
470
00:20:25,920 --> 00:20:28,000
You're the one that says you don't even remember.
471
00:20:28,000 --> 00:20:35,680
All right, everyone, it's time for Cody's segment, the split second sound off.
472
00:20:35,680 --> 00:20:42,480
Cody has exactly 30 minus 10 seconds to express what is bothering him.
473
00:20:42,480 --> 00:20:45,240
Once the timer is up, Cody is done.
474
00:20:45,240 --> 00:20:48,080
Now, Cody, take care.
475
00:20:48,080 --> 00:20:51,680
Just know, and I know because you just said this after we talked about this, if you complain
476
00:20:51,680 --> 00:20:56,120
about the report, there's going to be a further reduction.
477
00:20:56,120 --> 00:20:57,120
That's all I'm saying.
478
00:20:57,120 --> 00:20:59,280
OK, I'm setting the timer now, Cody.
479
00:20:59,280 --> 00:21:03,120
Time starts in three, two, one, go.
480
00:21:03,120 --> 00:21:07,280
Liam's being a right fucking cunt in the last last two episodes, especially when he was
481
00:21:07,280 --> 00:21:08,840
talking about the report.
482
00:21:08,840 --> 00:21:12,920
And I don't think it's quite fair that he has the final say in everything that he has
483
00:21:12,920 --> 00:21:13,920
to say.
484
00:21:13,920 --> 00:21:18,160
Also, the quesadilla from Taco Bell is still not the right fucking shape or size.
485
00:21:18,160 --> 00:21:20,280
It's really pissing me off.
486
00:21:20,280 --> 00:21:22,080
Liam's a bitch and it ends right about now.
487
00:21:22,080 --> 00:21:23,080
OK, time's up, Cody.
488
00:21:23,080 --> 00:21:24,080
Yep, that's right.
489
00:21:24,080 --> 00:21:25,080
All right, so Cody, I just.
490
00:21:25,080 --> 00:21:26,080
Oh, I had an extra second.
491
00:21:26,080 --> 00:21:28,960
Do you hear the alarm go off?
492
00:21:28,960 --> 00:21:29,960
That's bullshit.
493
00:21:29,960 --> 00:21:33,280
Cody, the alarm sounds once the 20 seconds has already ended.
494
00:21:33,280 --> 00:21:35,320
Those solid two seconds.
495
00:21:35,320 --> 00:21:36,320
Anyway.
496
00:21:36,320 --> 00:21:42,280
OK, I just want you to know that the next the next sound off you get is going to be
497
00:21:42,280 --> 00:21:47,200
15 seconds now because you did continue to rant after the alarm went off about the alarm
498
00:21:47,200 --> 00:21:48,200
going off.
499
00:21:48,200 --> 00:21:49,640
So, all right, that's all right.
500
00:21:49,640 --> 00:21:50,920
I timed myself.
501
00:21:50,920 --> 00:21:51,920
It's OK.
502
00:21:51,920 --> 00:21:52,920
It's OK.
503
00:21:52,920 --> 00:21:56,640
If you just if you just are on good behavior, you know, throughout the next episode, then
504
00:21:56,640 --> 00:21:57,640
you can.
505
00:21:57,640 --> 00:21:58,640
I don't know.
506
00:21:58,640 --> 00:22:03,080
I think it's a funny idea for him to, like, whittle his bit out of existence by just.
507
00:22:03,080 --> 00:22:04,640
I mean, it's not an idea.
508
00:22:04,640 --> 00:22:05,640
It's what's actively happening.
509
00:22:05,640 --> 00:22:06,640
And it's his own doing.
510
00:22:06,640 --> 00:22:07,640
The whole point of that segment is to.
511
00:22:07,640 --> 00:22:08,640
I stand by everything.
512
00:22:08,640 --> 00:22:12,400
I said, OK, all right, that's fine.
513
00:22:12,400 --> 00:22:13,960
You stand by what you say, Cody.
514
00:22:13,960 --> 00:22:15,520
You stand in your laurels.
515
00:22:15,520 --> 00:22:18,600
But I think we need to turn to a different subject now and talk about something more
516
00:22:18,600 --> 00:22:21,200
relevant, which is Sandy Claus.
517
00:22:21,200 --> 00:22:22,680
You guys know Sandy Claus?
518
00:22:22,680 --> 00:22:23,960
Yeah, he's Jack Skellington.
519
00:22:23,960 --> 00:22:24,960
Chris Kringle.
520
00:22:24,960 --> 00:22:26,440
Jack Skellington is not Sandy Claus.
521
00:22:26,440 --> 00:22:28,560
Jack Skellington kidnapped Sandy Claus.
522
00:22:28,560 --> 00:22:29,560
Had him kidnapped.
523
00:22:29,560 --> 00:22:30,560
Sorry.
524
00:22:30,560 --> 00:22:33,560
Pretty, pretty rude to say that.
525
00:22:33,560 --> 00:22:39,840
You know, that'd be like freaking comparing John Lennon and Mark David Chapman saying
526
00:22:39,840 --> 00:22:44,040
that the same guy, I didn't hear you, Cody, you're saying stuff and I can't hear you.
527
00:22:44,040 --> 00:22:45,040
Couldn't tell you who Mark.
528
00:22:45,040 --> 00:22:46,040
You know who John Lennon is?
529
00:22:46,040 --> 00:22:47,040
I know who John Lennon is.
530
00:22:47,040 --> 00:22:48,040
I know who the other guy is.
531
00:22:48,040 --> 00:22:51,040
Well, you know how John Lennon died?
532
00:22:51,040 --> 00:22:53,000
His last words were.
533
00:22:53,000 --> 00:22:54,540
I know how he does it died.
534
00:22:54,540 --> 00:22:57,080
Austin doesn't know how he died because he's a big guy.
535
00:22:57,080 --> 00:22:58,260
I mean, he's a big guy.
536
00:22:58,260 --> 00:22:59,260
He's a big guy.
537
00:22:59,260 --> 00:23:00,260
He's a big guy.
538
00:23:00,260 --> 00:23:04,240
I know how he does it died, Austin doesn't know how he died because he always gets it
539
00:23:04,240 --> 00:23:05,240
fucked up.
540
00:23:05,240 --> 00:23:06,240
He goes, really?
541
00:23:06,240 --> 00:23:08,240
What guys are assassinated from the Beatles?
542
00:23:08,240 --> 00:23:09,240
What's his name?
543
00:23:09,240 --> 00:23:11,120
Because they love me so much.
544
00:23:11,120 --> 00:23:17,520
Well, John Lennon's favorite is his last words were famously, oh my God, what are you doing?
545
00:23:17,520 --> 00:23:19,600
Don't shoot me.
546
00:23:19,600 --> 00:23:20,600
And then he got shot.
547
00:23:20,600 --> 00:23:24,320
That checks out by Mark David Chapman, the man who shot him.
548
00:23:24,320 --> 00:23:26,420
That's the comparison being made here.
549
00:23:26,420 --> 00:23:31,400
But Santa Claus, on the other hand, is a Coca-Cola icon.
550
00:23:31,400 --> 00:23:37,400
He's a very tubby man with a red button nose who brings presents to all the children and
551
00:23:37,400 --> 00:23:39,960
is omniscient of all of your good and bad actions.
552
00:23:39,960 --> 00:23:40,960
Coca-Cola?
553
00:23:40,960 --> 00:23:42,680
It's the polar bears for Coca-Cola.
554
00:23:42,680 --> 00:23:43,680
The polar bears?
555
00:23:43,680 --> 00:23:44,680
Santa Claus.
556
00:23:44,680 --> 00:23:45,680
What?
557
00:23:45,680 --> 00:23:46,680
Polar bears.
558
00:23:46,680 --> 00:23:47,880
Santa Claus Coca-Cola.
559
00:23:47,880 --> 00:23:54,760
Since I was a wee lad, these polar bear commercials and adverts have been Coca-Cola's thing.
560
00:23:54,760 --> 00:23:55,760
Really?
561
00:23:55,760 --> 00:24:00,920
I mean, I've seen more M&M's commercials with Santa Claus in it than I have Coca-Cola.
562
00:24:00,920 --> 00:24:05,440
You know they're still running the same M&M commercial from like 10, 15 years ago?
563
00:24:05,440 --> 00:24:06,440
Yeah.
564
00:24:06,440 --> 00:24:08,880
If it ain't broke.
565
00:24:08,880 --> 00:24:09,880
Don't fix it.
566
00:24:09,880 --> 00:24:12,960
So you don't think that Santa Claus is in any way, shape or form connected to Coca-Cola?
567
00:24:12,960 --> 00:24:13,960
Are you?
568
00:24:13,960 --> 00:24:19,880
Aside from him being surrounded by seas of white powder.
569
00:24:19,880 --> 00:24:25,520
Our modern day imagery of Santa Claus is derived very much from Coca-Cola advertising in the
570
00:24:25,520 --> 00:24:28,880
early 20th century.
571
00:24:28,880 --> 00:24:34,000
I don't know about you, Liam, but Adam and I were born in the 90s.
572
00:24:34,000 --> 00:24:35,760
Yeah, you were born in the 20th century.
573
00:24:35,760 --> 00:24:37,480
You were born in the late 20th century.
574
00:24:37,480 --> 00:24:38,480
Yeah.
575
00:24:38,480 --> 00:24:44,960
We weren't alive for the advertisement of 1920s Coca-Cola Santa.
576
00:24:44,960 --> 00:24:46,120
I didn't say 1920s.
577
00:24:46,120 --> 00:24:47,120
Did you Google it?
578
00:24:47,120 --> 00:24:48,120
No.
579
00:24:48,120 --> 00:24:49,640
Because that's actually probably not too far off.
580
00:24:49,640 --> 00:24:51,440
I imagine it was the 30s.
581
00:24:51,440 --> 00:24:55,760
But no, you don't have to be alive to know your history, Cody.
582
00:24:55,760 --> 00:24:57,640
You know, especially you.
583
00:24:57,640 --> 00:25:03,200
You're the history guy telling us about interesting things in history that happen.
584
00:25:03,200 --> 00:25:04,760
Competitions and events and such.
585
00:25:04,760 --> 00:25:07,360
Remember, there was once a format to the show.
586
00:25:07,360 --> 00:25:08,520
I can tell you what that was.
587
00:25:08,520 --> 00:25:09,520
Before you nuked it.
588
00:25:09,520 --> 00:25:12,520
I didn't do anything.
589
00:25:12,520 --> 00:25:14,440
Format schmormat.
590
00:25:14,440 --> 00:25:15,840
Yeah.
591
00:25:15,840 --> 00:25:19,120
And next week, next week's episode, Adam is going to be talking about Christmas video
592
00:25:19,120 --> 00:25:20,780
games.
593
00:25:20,780 --> 00:25:24,360
This is going to be talking about some kind of video game.
594
00:25:24,360 --> 00:25:26,720
Yeah, some kind of video game.
595
00:25:26,720 --> 00:25:30,760
OK, well, anyway, Santa Claus.
596
00:25:30,760 --> 00:25:35,920
Santa Claus is his current image is heavily linked with Coca-Cola.
597
00:25:35,920 --> 00:25:39,880
But Santa Claus obviously is a figure that existed before Coca-Cola co-opted the imagery
598
00:25:39,880 --> 00:25:42,080
and developed it into what we now know.
599
00:25:42,080 --> 00:25:46,560
So I want to ask you guys, are you familiar with any other versions of Santa Claus throughout
600
00:25:46,560 --> 00:25:47,560
the world?
601
00:25:47,560 --> 00:25:48,560
It's fart Pete.
602
00:25:48,560 --> 00:25:49,560
Fart Pete?
603
00:25:49,560 --> 00:25:51,160
You say fart Pete.
604
00:25:51,160 --> 00:25:52,160
Fart Pete.
605
00:25:52,160 --> 00:25:53,160
Fart Pete.
606
00:25:53,160 --> 00:25:56,560
Do you want to tell us a little bit about fart Pete?
607
00:25:56,560 --> 00:26:02,960
He would kidnap children who are naughty and make them his slaves or something like that.
608
00:26:02,960 --> 00:26:05,280
Right.
609
00:26:05,280 --> 00:26:06,920
Anything more?
610
00:26:06,920 --> 00:26:11,760
I feel like there's a racial tone to it at some point.
611
00:26:11,760 --> 00:26:13,680
Or am I getting that fucked up?
612
00:26:13,680 --> 00:26:14,680
I don't know.
613
00:26:14,680 --> 00:26:16,280
You'd have to tell me.
614
00:26:16,280 --> 00:26:19,280
You know, Liam.
615
00:26:19,280 --> 00:26:23,560
I don't know.
616
00:26:23,560 --> 00:26:30,720
I certainly don't know if fart Pete is traditionally portrayed by people wearing blackface.
617
00:26:30,720 --> 00:26:35,120
The next one that comes to my mind is just, you know, classic Saint Nicholas.
618
00:26:35,120 --> 00:26:39,840
Well, I would like to say that fart Pete is not actually a version of Santa Claus.
619
00:26:39,840 --> 00:26:44,440
He's typically depicted as Saint Nicholas's assistant.
620
00:26:44,440 --> 00:26:47,200
Who does kidnap children and is wearing blackface?
621
00:26:47,200 --> 00:26:53,600
People wearing blackface, yes, yes, but you know, it's supposed to be...
622
00:26:53,600 --> 00:26:54,600
There's no accusing it.
623
00:26:54,600 --> 00:26:55,600
It's bad.
624
00:26:55,600 --> 00:27:01,280
But yes, Saint Nicholas is obviously the genesis of the Santa Claus figure, right?
625
00:27:01,280 --> 00:27:04,280
I mean, we call him Saint Nick.
626
00:27:04,280 --> 00:27:06,440
He's often conflated.
627
00:27:06,440 --> 00:27:09,240
There's different versions in tons of different places, though.
628
00:27:09,240 --> 00:27:10,240
You know what I mean?
629
00:27:10,240 --> 00:27:13,560
I believe we talked about the French earlier.
630
00:27:13,560 --> 00:27:17,360
I believe the French call him Père Noël.
631
00:27:17,360 --> 00:27:25,320
He's largely the same in France, but I think he's got like a...
632
00:27:25,320 --> 00:27:29,680
Some kind of reindeer or something with a funny name.
633
00:27:29,680 --> 00:27:31,960
What's the name?
634
00:27:31,960 --> 00:27:34,280
He's a reindeer named like Guy or something.
635
00:27:34,280 --> 00:27:35,280
Some dumb French shit.
636
00:27:35,280 --> 00:27:36,280
You know, I don't know.
637
00:27:36,280 --> 00:27:37,280
Ask a French person.
638
00:27:37,280 --> 00:27:41,400
Tell me about the Père Noël.
639
00:27:41,400 --> 00:27:44,640
If you guys could make one upgrade to Santa Claus, what would it be?
640
00:27:44,640 --> 00:27:47,280
I think it's time for new colors.
641
00:27:47,280 --> 00:27:48,280
What color?
642
00:27:48,280 --> 00:27:49,280
Black?
643
00:27:49,280 --> 00:27:50,280
Yellow.
644
00:27:50,280 --> 00:27:54,300
Yes, the classic Christmas color.
645
00:27:54,300 --> 00:28:01,120
Would it still be a yellow and white suit or would it be red and yellow?
646
00:28:01,120 --> 00:28:02,120
Ketchup mustard.
647
00:28:02,120 --> 00:28:07,160
I was going to say red and yellow for actually that reason, ketchup mustard.
648
00:28:07,160 --> 00:28:08,760
Gross.
649
00:28:08,760 --> 00:28:09,760
Would you flip?
650
00:28:09,760 --> 00:28:10,840
Would you invert the colors though?
651
00:28:10,840 --> 00:28:14,440
Would the main suit be yellow with a red accent or the other way around?
652
00:28:14,440 --> 00:28:18,120
No, yeah, it would be a red accent because mustard is the superior condiment.
653
00:28:18,120 --> 00:28:19,120
Okay.
654
00:28:19,120 --> 00:28:21,160
How about you, Cody?
655
00:28:21,160 --> 00:28:22,160
What would you do?
656
00:28:22,160 --> 00:28:25,280
Make Santa jacked.
657
00:28:25,280 --> 00:28:35,720
You know, you see all these younger millennials and older Gen Zers getting fucking swole as
658
00:28:35,720 --> 00:28:38,600
fuck at the gym.
659
00:28:38,600 --> 00:28:45,000
I think they appreciate Santa a little more nowadays if Santa had a fucking a 12 pack
660
00:28:45,000 --> 00:28:47,960
and he could fucking deadlift a thousand pounds.
661
00:28:47,960 --> 00:28:52,360
I know already did that in the movie that's coming out soon or is already in theaters
662
00:28:52,360 --> 00:28:56,000
starring your boy, Chris Evans and Dwayne Johnson.
663
00:28:56,000 --> 00:28:57,000
Red one.
664
00:28:57,000 --> 00:28:58,000
Yes.
665
00:28:58,000 --> 00:28:59,000
The horrible looking movie.
666
00:28:59,000 --> 00:29:01,400
Yeah, that movie.
667
00:29:01,400 --> 00:29:04,040
That movie made no fucking money, by the way.
668
00:29:04,040 --> 00:29:05,840
Did you watch it?
669
00:29:05,840 --> 00:29:13,160
No, but I read an article about how that movie, it would cost like 250 million dollars.
670
00:29:13,160 --> 00:29:18,360
50 million dollars was the Rock's salary for that movie.
671
00:29:18,360 --> 00:29:22,400
A hundred million dollars was for advertising the movie.
672
00:29:22,400 --> 00:29:23,400
Yeah.
673
00:29:23,400 --> 00:29:24,400
Like press and everything.
674
00:29:24,400 --> 00:29:28,400
So that means a third of the movie's actual budget was the Rock.
675
00:29:28,400 --> 00:29:29,400
Okay.
676
00:29:29,400 --> 00:29:33,080
You're saying a 50 of the 150 million that were left.
677
00:29:33,080 --> 00:29:34,080
Well that makes sense.
678
00:29:34,080 --> 00:29:38,320
He is an incredibly highly paid actor and he values himself very highly even though
679
00:29:38,320 --> 00:29:40,960
he seems to be franchise kryptonite.
680
00:29:40,960 --> 00:29:42,240
Yeah he seems to be that way.
681
00:29:42,240 --> 00:29:44,960
Do you guys remember when he was saying that he was going to, I forget what the fuck was
682
00:29:44,960 --> 00:29:45,960
the goal.
683
00:29:45,960 --> 00:29:46,960
He was going to save the DCU?
684
00:29:46,960 --> 00:29:50,920
No, he said he was going to upend the dynamic or something like that.
685
00:29:50,920 --> 00:29:51,920
Yeah.
686
00:29:51,920 --> 00:29:57,360
And then he doesn't show up to set or he's late to everything that he's in and he's a
687
00:29:57,360 --> 00:30:03,040
bad actor that has one gimmick that he can't fucking lose a fight because he's always in
688
00:30:03,040 --> 00:30:04,120
his contract.
689
00:30:04,120 --> 00:30:05,120
It's stupid.
690
00:30:05,120 --> 00:30:06,120
Sorry.
691
00:30:06,120 --> 00:30:09,800
He said the hierarchy of power in the DC universe is about to change.
692
00:30:09,800 --> 00:30:15,860
Yeah and then his movie was the lowest grossing DC movie to exist.
693
00:30:15,860 --> 00:30:16,860
I don't know.
694
00:30:16,860 --> 00:30:17,860
Is that true?
695
00:30:17,860 --> 00:30:18,860
It might be that badly.
696
00:30:18,860 --> 00:30:19,860
I know it ain't shit.
697
00:30:19,860 --> 00:30:20,860
I just don't know.
698
00:30:20,860 --> 00:30:31,280
I think Blue Beetle might be pretty low but yeah it did terribly.
699
00:30:31,280 --> 00:30:32,280
Damn.
700
00:30:32,280 --> 00:30:42,880
Anyway, no, yes I want ripped JK Simmons as Santa Claus and oh instead of the reindeer
701
00:30:42,880 --> 00:30:47,920
pulling the sleigh like let's say a bunch of the reindeer broke their magic legs and
702
00:30:47,920 --> 00:30:51,560
he has to carry the sleigh across the earth.
703
00:30:51,560 --> 00:30:55,480
So you're saying he's doing like a Fred Flintstone thing with his legs.
704
00:30:55,480 --> 00:30:56,480
Yeah.
705
00:30:56,480 --> 00:30:57,480
Interesting.
706
00:30:57,480 --> 00:30:58,480
That is definitely an idea.
707
00:30:58,480 --> 00:31:03,320
I have to say neither of these ideas you guys have put forth are really actual upgrades
708
00:31:03,320 --> 00:31:04,320
to Santa.
709
00:31:04,320 --> 00:31:05,320
I think mine is.
710
00:31:05,320 --> 00:31:09,080
I mean Adam you literally just decided to change his outfit and Cody all you want to
711
00:31:09,080 --> 00:31:12,560
do is make it so that he speaks to the body image issues of the younger generation.
712
00:31:12,560 --> 00:31:14,600
There's no body image issues.
713
00:31:14,600 --> 00:31:15,600
Yeah definitely not.
714
00:31:15,600 --> 00:31:16,600
No why would there?
715
00:31:16,600 --> 00:31:17,600
Certainly not.
716
00:31:17,600 --> 00:31:18,600
What do you mean?
717
00:31:18,600 --> 00:31:23,920
We're not quickly hurtling into a societal reality where everyone has this concept that
718
00:31:23,920 --> 00:31:27,640
their body should be something that is quite literally unattainable and non-human.
719
00:31:27,640 --> 00:31:30,040
No that's not a thing.
720
00:31:30,040 --> 00:31:31,040
You're right.
721
00:31:31,040 --> 00:31:33,120
Children aren't being disproportionately affected by that.
722
00:31:33,120 --> 00:31:34,120
No.
723
00:31:34,120 --> 00:31:36,840
And certainly we should make Santa ripped and jacked and sexy.
724
00:31:36,840 --> 00:31:37,840
What's wrong with that?
725
00:31:37,840 --> 00:31:38,840
A hot Santa.
726
00:31:38,840 --> 00:31:41,160
Yeah Santa who's fuckable.
727
00:31:41,160 --> 00:31:42,800
You don't want to fuck Santa?
728
00:31:42,800 --> 00:31:44,160
No not particularly.
729
00:31:44,160 --> 00:31:45,960
I know lots of people would though.
730
00:31:45,960 --> 00:31:46,960
Yeah.
731
00:31:46,960 --> 00:31:49,080
Do you think Santa muck bangs?
732
00:31:49,080 --> 00:31:51,120
No because he's too busy.
733
00:31:51,120 --> 00:31:53,520
Now Rudolph on the other hand I could see muck banging.
734
00:31:53,520 --> 00:31:57,560
Frosty I could see him muck banging but all the food would just get stuck in his snowballs.
735
00:31:57,560 --> 00:32:06,640
What about Cornelius, Yukon Cornelius from the island of Misfist Toys?
736
00:32:06,640 --> 00:32:10,080
Yukon Cornelius is the he's the prospector right?
737
00:32:10,080 --> 00:32:11,640
Yeah yeah I was right yeah.
738
00:32:11,640 --> 00:32:12,640
What about him?
739
00:32:12,640 --> 00:32:13,960
Do you think he muck bangs?
740
00:32:13,960 --> 00:32:18,240
I don't think he muck bangs but he probably has a lot of gay sex with that little that
741
00:32:18,240 --> 00:32:20,160
little elf who's just gay.
742
00:32:20,160 --> 00:32:21,840
He's like I don't want to make toys.
743
00:32:21,840 --> 00:32:25,040
I want to be a dentist.
744
00:32:25,040 --> 00:32:28,160
You think I'm doing something offensive here go back and re-watch the movie.
745
00:32:28,160 --> 00:32:29,440
That's what he sounds like.
746
00:32:29,440 --> 00:32:30,920
I'm agreeing with you Liam.
747
00:32:30,920 --> 00:32:36,420
And all of his dialogue is very not not thinly veiled about how he's he doesn't fit in because
748
00:32:36,420 --> 00:32:37,420
he's different.
749
00:32:37,420 --> 00:32:42,120
It's like guys come on just let him love other elves it's fine it's fine.
750
00:32:42,120 --> 00:32:44,200
Who in the 1930s?
751
00:32:44,200 --> 00:32:47,260
I think they're probably a little couple and and who's the top?
752
00:32:47,260 --> 00:32:49,400
It's not who you think it is.
753
00:32:49,400 --> 00:32:50,640
It's Rudolph.
754
00:32:50,640 --> 00:32:52,660
It's that Jack in the Box.
755
00:32:52,660 --> 00:32:55,240
Do you think that they're having sex with a reindeer?
756
00:32:55,240 --> 00:32:56,560
No that's why I said the Jack in the Box.
757
00:32:56,560 --> 00:33:01,480
I was talking about a relationship between two consenting human like adults.
758
00:33:01,480 --> 00:33:04,440
You're adding bestiality into the mix I just don't like it I'm sorry.
759
00:33:04,440 --> 00:33:06,160
That's fine you can cut that.
760
00:33:06,160 --> 00:33:07,160
I won't.
761
00:33:07,160 --> 00:33:08,640
All right that's on you.
762
00:33:08,640 --> 00:33:11,000
I won't that's that's that's on you is what it is.
763
00:33:11,000 --> 00:33:12,480
That's on you Liam.
764
00:33:12,480 --> 00:33:16,220
Hey but how about how about that abominable snow band with no teeth huh?
765
00:33:16,220 --> 00:33:18,960
What that mouth do?
766
00:33:18,960 --> 00:33:19,960
Probably make you pretty cold.
767
00:33:19,960 --> 00:33:20,960
How did we get here?
768
00:33:20,960 --> 00:33:25,240
You got us here.
769
00:33:25,240 --> 00:33:26,660
What would you change about?
770
00:33:26,660 --> 00:33:30,640
I am the wind that steers the ship Cody I am not the ship itself you are at the wheel.
771
00:33:30,640 --> 00:33:32,640
You take us where you need to go.
772
00:33:32,640 --> 00:33:35,280
Why are you asking us if we would upgrade Santa?
773
00:33:35,280 --> 00:33:39,520
Well first of all it well just I'm curious because there's all these different depictions
774
00:33:39,520 --> 00:33:43,800
of Santa and they're all like the same but a little different sometimes he eats he wants
775
00:33:43,800 --> 00:33:46,840
carrots for his little magic donkey or whatever.
776
00:33:46,840 --> 00:33:51,560
Sometimes he has an assistant who kidnaps children and is in blackface you know which
777
00:33:51,560 --> 00:33:58,880
is that's cool Netherlands you do you you know I don't want to hear about it but you
778
00:33:58,880 --> 00:34:05,040
know I just think Santa has largely remained the same in our culture conception for the
779
00:34:05,040 --> 00:34:12,840
past however long and I think he could use a refreshment you know not like not like a
780
00:34:12,840 --> 00:34:18,280
total overhaul but well first of all we talked about you know big balls so I think to go
781
00:34:18,280 --> 00:34:23,000
along with what Cody was saying about modifying Santa's body maybe just as like a superficial
782
00:34:23,000 --> 00:34:27,400
thing that doesn't count as my thing we should have him have massive testicles just so the
783
00:34:27,400 --> 00:34:33,060
people that's what his sacks for people can identify with Santa you know like regular
784
00:34:33,060 --> 00:34:37,280
people with overly large balls can identify with Santa I mean I don't know anybody like
785
00:34:37,280 --> 00:34:42,640
that but like I could imagine a girl but as a kid with really big balls be pretty hard
786
00:34:42,640 --> 00:34:48,720
to see all the depictions of Santa and not see any moose knuckle but I think maybe reindeer
787
00:34:48,720 --> 00:34:55,880
Santa if thank you Adam thank you actually thank you if I were to upgrade Santa I would
788
00:34:55,880 --> 00:35:02,120
probably have him have like laser vision like Cyclops from X-Men why but he wouldn't have
789
00:35:02,120 --> 00:35:07,840
the technology to develop the glasses to prevent it from blasting off at people so he'd just
790
00:35:07,840 --> 00:35:13,660
be constantly mowing apart houses and mountaintops and stuff why because I think Santa needs
791
00:35:13,660 --> 00:35:18,900
a little danger added he needs a little unpredictability you know like right now when you think of
792
00:35:18,900 --> 00:35:24,080
Santa he's too predictable no you can't catch him putting the presents under your tree but
793
00:35:24,080 --> 00:35:28,280
you know he's gonna come every year like clockwork on Christmas he's gonna eat your fucking cookies
794
00:35:28,280 --> 00:35:33,760
he's gonna be diabetic what do you mean it's not true what if you're Jewish he'll still
795
00:35:33,760 --> 00:35:39,560
eat your cookies he'll put them out for you yes he will do you have evidence of this happening
796
00:35:39,560 --> 00:35:46,040
ask any Jewish person I unfortunately I don't you haven't no you don't know oh you don't
797
00:35:46,040 --> 00:35:50,240
have any Jewish friends Cody that's so strange I can't imagine why that is but I you know
798
00:35:50,240 --> 00:35:55,280
I just I if you ask anybody they know I'm not making any assumptions about you it's
799
00:35:55,280 --> 00:35:58,360
not like you're making assumptions about me Liam I would never I think that's pretty fucked
800
00:35:58,360 --> 00:36:02,760
up I would never do such a thing I let your actions and your words speak for themselves
801
00:36:02,760 --> 00:36:08,440
are we gonna have a conversation about Santa you're ruining Santa for him do you want to
802
00:36:08,440 --> 00:36:10,840
have a conversation about Santa you want to talk about something else you're just being
803
00:36:10,840 --> 00:36:14,480
a little rude you're just being a little I think someone's getting on the naughty list
804
00:36:14,480 --> 00:36:19,320
this year he's been I was already on the naughty list you confirmed that for me no that's not
805
00:36:19,320 --> 00:36:25,840
true I didn't say that I said that you get another your friendship this year therefore
806
00:36:25,840 --> 00:36:29,400
you would be on the nice list interesting so you're saying that all your friends are
807
00:36:29,400 --> 00:36:34,200
on the nice list bar bar none every single one so far yeah I find it hard to believe
808
00:36:34,200 --> 00:36:40,600
I know some of your friends yeah some of them are nice some of them are good who's mean
809
00:36:40,600 --> 00:36:46,840
I'd rather not say I'd rather not so are you implying that I might be mean no Adam I told
810
00:36:46,840 --> 00:36:50,920
you you're my friend I care about you I bought you a Christmas present for God sakes I don't
811
00:36:50,920 --> 00:36:55,320
make you know big declarations like Cody where I say all my friends are great people but
812
00:36:55,320 --> 00:37:01,960
you're at least good company at least you know on with all this Christmas talk I have
813
00:37:01,960 --> 00:37:06,640
a question I'd like to throw back to you guys and this kind of I would love a question sort
814
00:37:06,640 --> 00:37:14,160
of ties back to our previous episode where we were talking about mascots so if you had
815
00:37:14,160 --> 00:37:21,040
to remove Santa from the equation and have a new mascot for Christmas and you know just
816
00:37:21,040 --> 00:37:28,800
don't even think about Jesus either who would you who would you maybe nominate for that
817
00:37:28,800 --> 00:37:37,520
position Mrs. Claus so Santa's gone but Mrs. Claus still exists yeah strong independent
818
00:37:37,520 --> 00:37:42,000
woman don't need no man you know actually can we take a quick diversion I do want to
819
00:37:42,000 --> 00:37:47,320
keep on this question but I do just want to bring up the Disney film the Santa Claus oh
820
00:37:47,320 --> 00:37:51,960
yes he kills Santa in the beginning right yeah and then in the next is it in the first
821
00:37:51,960 --> 00:37:55,680
one or the second one where he has to get a wife second day Santa second so in the
822
00:37:55,680 --> 00:38:00,100
second one is established that you need a wife to be Santa Claus or remain Santa Claus
823
00:38:00,100 --> 00:38:03,320
but he kills Santa in the first one so does that not imply that the Santa in the first
824
00:38:03,320 --> 00:38:06,560
one should have had a Mrs. Claus yeah and therefore there should have been a Mrs. Claus
825
00:38:06,560 --> 00:38:11,360
in the North Pole when that Santa died and then she what happened to her dead did she
826
00:38:11,360 --> 00:38:15,040
drop dead did she disappear did all the elves say hey there's a new Santa you need to get
827
00:38:15,040 --> 00:38:20,600
the fuck out of here go you're being hit the pavement broad oh Tim Allen did a partake
828
00:38:20,600 --> 00:38:25,840
in a lot of white powder himself so yeah the white powder of selling all your friends out
829
00:38:25,840 --> 00:38:33,320
to reduce your prison time yep that tracks I think she dropped dead so are you implying
830
00:38:33,320 --> 00:38:38,560
I that I feel like that implies that all of the elves then had to carry her body off and
831
00:38:38,560 --> 00:38:44,320
quietly bury it so before Tim Allen arrived there because Santa the for the OG Santa and
832
00:38:44,320 --> 00:38:52,040
that kind of just dusts remember yeah he does just dust so it except for the clothes so
833
00:38:52,040 --> 00:38:57,080
that means that the elves were like oh well I guess it's just Mrs. Claus's clothes and
834
00:38:57,080 --> 00:39:01,840
they just take her clothes and then maybe wash it and then give it to Tim Allen's maybe
835
00:39:01,840 --> 00:39:06,880
wash it maybe wash it and give it to Tim Allen's new when they gave it to his wife they were
836
00:39:06,880 --> 00:39:12,840
like a woman died in the woman died here well actually presumably dozens of women have died
837
00:39:12,840 --> 00:39:17,400
yeah yeah and now it's here turned away anyway anyway back to Adam's question I just wanted
838
00:39:17,400 --> 00:39:22,600
to bring that up and say whoever designed the farting reindeer in those films deserves
839
00:39:22,600 --> 00:39:29,700
an Oscar for their special effects but anyway Adam your question of so this question of
840
00:39:29,700 --> 00:39:34,840
new mascot for Christmas are we talking existing mascots brought in for Christmas or we make
841
00:39:34,840 --> 00:39:40,760
up our own new mascot for whatever Avenue you feel I'll leave that open I feel like
842
00:39:40,760 --> 00:39:46,640
not establishing that as a boundary opens this up for further possibility okay I got
843
00:39:46,640 --> 00:39:52,960
several ideas I think you could slot Ronald McDonnie in there as a mascot because just
844
00:39:52,960 --> 00:39:58,400
like Santa being associated with Coca-Cola Ronald McDonnell would be a perfect mascot
845
00:39:58,400 --> 00:40:02,640
associated with the American identity if we're talking American Santa here we're not replacing
846
00:40:02,640 --> 00:40:08,400
Satan Nicholas or Sinterklaas or any of them or paranoia you know they can have their own
847
00:40:08,400 --> 00:40:15,840
shit we get Ronald McDonald Ronald McSanta I think he'd fit well if not Ronald McSanta
848
00:40:15,840 --> 00:40:21,920
or grimace as Santa I'll raise you one grimace if not that then I would say it should be
849
00:40:21,920 --> 00:40:29,400
a pig a Christmas pig now with that Liam with the sleigh now be the big red shoe absolutely
850
00:40:29,400 --> 00:40:34,760
whole nine yards the reindeer can be a bunch of grimaces who are enslaved to him you know
851
00:40:34,760 --> 00:40:39,520
whatever you want to make it especially after you said all that stuff about the last episode
852
00:40:39,520 --> 00:40:45,080
that might track okay then the reindeer can be there yeah yeah that's pretty fucked up
853
00:40:45,080 --> 00:40:50,120
Liam what was grimace's brother's name again King King Bongo or something like that something
854
00:40:50,120 --> 00:40:56,560
really bad Grombo or something like that grundo can't grundo I don't think it was grundo but
855
00:40:56,560 --> 00:41:01,880
let's go with that so King grundo is at the at the helm of the big red shoe you also have
856
00:41:01,880 --> 00:41:08,120
Merrimick cheese and bondage beer at the front of the line I would assume yeah Merrimick
857
00:41:08,120 --> 00:41:21,240
please that's the best thing I've heard in a minute so Cody what do you think what would
858
00:41:21,240 --> 00:41:24,440
your pick be if you had to pick a different mascot and then what would you have the mascot
859
00:41:24,440 --> 00:41:33,280
be if it was a whole new one I think Captain Crunch interesting can you explain can you
860
00:41:33,280 --> 00:41:40,000
explain your reasoning he already has a flying vessel that could hold more storage for Christmas
861
00:41:40,000 --> 00:41:47,720
the ship the ship this is ship fly the ship flies hmm canonically the ship flies at light
862
00:41:47,720 --> 00:41:52,160
speed already okay you know wait wait where are you getting the cannon where are you getting
863
00:41:52,160 --> 00:41:58,400
the cabin crunch cannon have you never watched the commercials there are calculations for
864
00:41:58,400 --> 00:42:04,200
how fast that ship flies Liam who's done the calculations internet sleuths yes interesting
865
00:42:04,200 --> 00:42:09,600
so you think that he'd be incredibly effective at I think he'd be incredibly effective and
866
00:42:09,600 --> 00:42:17,360
honestly I want me a mascot that destroys the roof of my mouth with their presence presence
867
00:42:17,360 --> 00:42:22,400
delivery yeah so does that imply that he's gonna be shooting every present into your
868
00:42:22,400 --> 00:42:26,760
mouth regardless of size yeah that's what he has the broadside cannons for it shoots
869
00:42:26,760 --> 00:42:33,160
it straight into your fucking teeth so you're bound to have like a multitude of new Christmas
870
00:42:33,160 --> 00:42:42,360
morning jaw and nose injuries like severe breakages if you're good like imagine you're
871
00:42:42,360 --> 00:42:48,960
getting a brand new bicycle right for Christmas Santa Claus and he so so Captain Claus is
872
00:42:48,960 --> 00:42:57,000
jettisoning that bicycle out at you at light speed right into your mouth yeah I mean you're
873
00:42:57,000 --> 00:43:02,280
either getting a wheel face first or a spoke or a handle like directly into your nose Merry
874
00:43:02,280 --> 00:43:12,320
Christmas bitch yeah well I mean Santa shouldn't be giving big presents out why not well I
875
00:43:12,320 --> 00:43:17,040
think the big present should be coming from the parents I didn't realize that there was
876
00:43:17,040 --> 00:43:21,560
any kind of limitation put on the type or size present that because then Santa would
877
00:43:21,560 --> 00:43:27,280
hate poor kids and you don't want me at Santa doesn't hate poor kids you sure about that
878
00:43:27,280 --> 00:43:32,360
Santa gets people Xboxes and all I got from Santa was socks I think that might be less
879
00:43:32,360 --> 00:43:39,000
of a your income thing and more of a your demeanor then that means no do you have access
880
00:43:39,000 --> 00:43:43,160
to the archives for the naughty list Cody because I have a feeling your names on there
881
00:43:43,160 --> 00:43:49,120
I was this once or twice I was a great kid until Adam ruined me oh yeah yep can you
882
00:43:49,120 --> 00:43:54,000
corroborate that Adam did you ruin Cody you know I didn't think I would be given so much
883
00:43:54,000 --> 00:43:59,680
credit but I'm honored see he admitted to it wow he admitted you have known him for
884
00:43:59,680 --> 00:44:04,680
a very long time so even if it's his fault you were on the list I presume so Cody if
885
00:44:04,680 --> 00:44:09,240
you had to make a new mascot what would you what would you choose a new mascot so me I
886
00:44:09,240 --> 00:44:13,920
said a pig a Christmas pig and that pig would have like a little newsboy cap probably and
887
00:44:13,920 --> 00:44:18,920
a nice Christmas scarf and maybe also like a fancy watch I don't know why I just think
888
00:44:18,920 --> 00:44:22,160
that you know if you're delivering all these presents on time all around the world you
889
00:44:22,160 --> 00:44:25,360
can you be able to tell what time it is to be like that is it gonna be the fucking stopwatch
890
00:44:25,360 --> 00:44:30,800
that the conductor has from the Polar Express that no but sure you could be it could be
891
00:44:30,800 --> 00:44:34,840
if you want to rope in other stuff but I don't think that film has a very good legacy why
892
00:44:34,840 --> 00:44:40,840
doesn't it it's pretty uncanny Valley I don't know when the last time you watched it was
893
00:44:40,840 --> 00:44:46,000
I would say a Christmas penguin Christmas penguin okay all right that's that's pretty
894
00:44:46,000 --> 00:44:51,860
in line with the with Christmas already winter yeah with Christmas already him waddling back
895
00:44:51,860 --> 00:44:59,360
and forth brings a good a good march to what he needs yeah it gives it some rhythm set
896
00:44:59,360 --> 00:45:03,400
it gives are we talking like to the to the elves that are working in the factory and
897
00:45:03,400 --> 00:45:10,160
you know he's on time he's on pace it's definitely not feathers McGraw we talking like like Colin
898
00:45:10,160 --> 00:45:17,160
Farrell penguin no no no no no that type of guy no no no like cunning you know like up
899
00:45:17,160 --> 00:45:23,100
and coming mobster so I haven't seen it so I haven't seen it don't say anymore no like
900
00:45:23,100 --> 00:45:32,280
the animal a penguin mmm bog standard six foot tall penguin bog standard that is yeah
901
00:45:32,280 --> 00:45:42,920
that has a cowboy hat and he walks around with a flannel tied around his waist and a
902
00:45:42,920 --> 00:45:51,580
cowboy hat you know I like that I keeping it American no no no no no no no penguins
903
00:45:51,580 --> 00:45:56,680
they can't be American why not that seems like a very prejudiced comment well what you
904
00:45:56,680 --> 00:46:00,840
said was a prejudice comment but saying that he was American why is it a cowboy hat and
905
00:46:00,840 --> 00:46:05,240
a flannel so cowboys can exist anywhere else flannels exist in other countries too Liam
906
00:46:05,240 --> 00:46:11,360
and penguins exist in aquariums Cody but Cody the context of the prompt was we were replacing
907
00:46:11,360 --> 00:46:16,640
the iconography with the American Santa okay then then yeah sure yeah keep them American
908
00:46:16,640 --> 00:46:23,800
you know look at look at these photos and just try to see what I'm seeing here I Adam
909
00:46:23,800 --> 00:46:28,280
Adam has just sent a picture of a seal and a wall so we got a seal and a walrus those
910
00:46:28,280 --> 00:46:35,800
are two animals that I think could be Christmas mascots now Adam I don't think you've taken
911
00:46:35,800 --> 00:46:42,520
into account that both of those creatures will try to kill my penguin that's fucked
912
00:46:42,520 --> 00:46:49,560
up I don't know what you're talking about man or okay how about how about I have one
913
00:46:49,560 --> 00:46:54,760
more for you how about this how about how about a fucking narwhal they they're they
914
00:46:54,760 --> 00:47:02,680
they are the unicorns of the sea so apparently they've already got some magic to them and
915
00:47:02,680 --> 00:47:10,500
Christmas is a magical time what do narwhals eat what do narwhals eat
916
00:47:10,500 --> 00:47:19,280
not penguins definitely oh man what are you trying to kill my fucking penguin I think
917
00:47:19,280 --> 00:47:28,020
these are three magical arctic associated entities that you know what I take it back
918
00:47:28,020 --> 00:47:33,380
okay I take mine back I don't want it to be a penguin why not we haven't talked we haven't
919
00:47:33,380 --> 00:47:41,600
talked about this country enough in the last two weeks I want a fucking kangaroo to head
920
00:47:41,600 --> 00:47:47,160
the sleigh they have the pouch that's where the sack goes they have a built-in sack full
921
00:47:47,160 --> 00:47:53,800
of gifts they have a built-in sack to hold all the gifts they hop around country to country
922
00:47:53,800 --> 00:47:58,320
state to state city to city neighborhood to neighborhood to summer you know what I like
923
00:47:58,320 --> 00:48:02,720
this I could see kangaroos being a Christmas thing this kind of fits in with your jacked
924
00:48:02,720 --> 00:48:08,760
Santa idea yeah because he gets the best muscular and scary I don't know if you've seen videos
925
00:48:08,760 --> 00:48:17,520
of them yeah frightening I have yeah I think a kangaroo must lead the charge in becoming
926
00:48:17,520 --> 00:48:23,560
the new mascot the new figurehead of Christmas who do we have to contact to make this happen
927
00:48:23,560 --> 00:48:29,860
the Coca-Cola corporation I will contact the Prime Minister why don't you contact the
928
00:48:29,860 --> 00:48:34,720
President United States of America I've heard that he's been pardoning people what do you
929
00:48:34,720 --> 00:48:41,640
mean maybe he pardoned all the the kangaroos that have committed war crimes can he do that
930
00:48:41,640 --> 00:48:45,960
if the crimes happened in another country but they're seeking asylum here do we I didn't
931
00:48:45,960 --> 00:48:50,320
know we had kangaroo asylum seekers this is not an issue that was brought up on the debate
932
00:48:50,320 --> 00:48:54,920
stage that's for sure no yeah it's a topic that I'm very passionate about that's funny
933
00:48:54,920 --> 00:48:58,440
I've never heard you mention it before but I'm glad that your heart is finding some passion
934
00:48:58,440 --> 00:49:03,400
in this political sphere did did kangaroos have anything to do with the great emu war
935
00:49:03,400 --> 00:49:10,040
yeah there they were on each other's sides brothers I'll be contacting I'll be contacting
936
00:49:10,040 --> 00:49:19,720
Anthony Albanese to to help head the ostrich the the the kangaroos coming to the United
937
00:49:19,720 --> 00:49:26,320
States and becoming the new figurehead of Santa you know there is I have to imagine
938
00:49:26,320 --> 00:49:33,080
that there's genocide that happens at least once a year in Australia already with the
939
00:49:33,080 --> 00:49:40,360
annual red crab migration what is that I don't know about this tell me so every year there's
940
00:49:40,360 --> 00:49:49,000
this I think it's a particular area of Australia is just overrun with like billions or just
941
00:49:49,000 --> 00:49:53,520
like an insane amount of red crabs that they like just create a Red Sea across the ground
942
00:49:53,520 --> 00:50:00,800
like you can't not step on them and it's really freaky like if you look at pictures and videos
943
00:50:00,800 --> 00:50:06,560
of this it is just like quite literally a sea of crabs moving along the ground yeah
944
00:50:06,560 --> 00:50:10,640
but they're so small there's a lot of them are really small and then other ones are a
945
00:50:10,640 --> 00:50:17,520
bit bigger some of them are like you can hold like hundreds and you're in the palm of your
946
00:50:17,520 --> 00:50:21,960
hand but then there's like larger ones yeah they're like five inches max they're not that
947
00:50:21,960 --> 00:50:28,400
big but still I'm just saying I have to imagine with this going on every year that's at least
948
00:50:28,400 --> 00:50:35,480
one form of genocide already happening within the animal kingdom in Australia I didn't know
949
00:50:35,480 --> 00:50:44,000
about the crabs I knew about another incursion into the Australian ecosystem cane toads I
950
00:50:44,000 --> 00:50:49,440
know that's a big thing there I know they introduced cane toads to try to get rid of
951
00:50:49,440 --> 00:50:53,660
some other pests like they introduced them to Australia and then basically there was
952
00:50:53,660 --> 00:50:59,120
no sufficient predator for the cane toads so they were just like overrun with cane toads
953
00:50:59,120 --> 00:51:02,860
everywhere to the point where people would like try to run them over on the road because
954
00:51:02,860 --> 00:51:07,720
they were so they were harming the ecosystem so much there I don't know if that's still
955
00:51:07,720 --> 00:51:12,120
as big of a problem as it was but I remember watching like a documentary on that like a
956
00:51:12,120 --> 00:51:19,240
decade ago I saw something a couple months ago talking about how like dingos are in in
957
00:51:19,240 --> 00:51:24,280
invasive species to Australia but there's speculation that they weren't actually from
958
00:51:24,280 --> 00:51:31,640
Australia to begin with researchers just found out that they have been a natural entity in
959
00:51:31,640 --> 00:51:37,800
Australia for thousands and thousands of thousands of years so they do they are now a protected
960
00:51:37,800 --> 00:51:42,740
species in Australia really they can't do anything about it yeah so there might be like
961
00:51:42,740 --> 00:51:50,040
an overrunning of dingos and they can't do anything about it what about when a dingo
962
00:51:50,040 --> 00:51:54,320
ate my baby which did actually happen yeah that was yeah people made a big joke about
963
00:51:54,320 --> 00:52:01,560
that but it did happen it did happen poor baby only if kangaroo Santa was there to save
964
00:52:01,560 --> 00:52:09,040
you don't I'm not trying to be snarky this is just genuine interest don't kangaroos kind
965
00:52:09,040 --> 00:52:14,280
of go out of their way like looking for fights with people I hope you are an incredibly aggressive
966
00:52:14,280 --> 00:52:19,960
species yeah like don't they try to square up with people sometimes there's the deer
967
00:52:19,960 --> 00:52:27,120
of America I've uh the dear of America I've watched videos of people I there's a one video
968
00:52:27,120 --> 00:52:32,520
I really love of a guy whose dog is like getting kind of oh yeah I can't grew and they got
969
00:52:32,520 --> 00:52:37,440
like this one you can't you can't actually fight fucking but the guy like runs up to
970
00:52:37,440 --> 00:52:43,120
the kangaroo and just socks it in the face and the thing is so it's stunned stunned by
971
00:52:43,120 --> 00:52:47,000
the fact that he did that that it doesn't like do anything really and then he kind of
972
00:52:47,000 --> 00:52:52,280
squares up yells at it and then backs off with the dog which is nice it's like yo respect
973
00:52:52,280 --> 00:52:57,960
yes yeah the the kangaroo genuinely was not anticipating that he was like wow the audacity
974
00:52:57,960 --> 00:53:05,720
of this motherfucker they deer fucking deer kangaroos are scary man deer are scary Adam
975
00:53:05,720 --> 00:53:15,120
can we commission your sister to take our ideas of who we want to replace Santa our
976
00:53:15,120 --> 00:53:22,240
collective animals to be the figurehead of Santa and have them make them and then we
977
00:53:22,240 --> 00:53:27,800
vote which one looks the best I like this in the forum oh or we have Austin pick because
978
00:53:27,800 --> 00:53:32,160
he's not here I that I this is a fantastic Austin doesn't get the privilege of picking
979
00:53:32,160 --> 00:53:35,960
I think we should do this I like this idea for a bit Austin can have the privilege of
980
00:53:35,960 --> 00:53:42,360
picking if and when he finally turns in the first draft of our mascot that's what I feel
981
00:53:42,360 --> 00:53:45,480
I think we need to be firm on this Cody we can't go easy on him just because you love
982
00:53:45,480 --> 00:53:52,880
him no I'm I'm not both of these things should happen well yes well yes Liam Cody what is
983
00:53:52,880 --> 00:54:01,360
your favorite Christmas memory my favorite Christmas memory I know mine I don't know
984
00:54:01,360 --> 00:54:05,520
I've had a look at Christmases I like spending Christmas with my family I don't know I don't
985
00:54:05,520 --> 00:54:10,080
have a specific Christmas memory is my favorite now I don't remember my childhood very well
986
00:54:10,080 --> 00:54:14,880
honestly in all honesty so I just remember adult Christmases and some were odd some were
987
00:54:14,880 --> 00:54:20,720
very interesting it had a COVID Christmas yeah we got sick I didn't but my one of my
988
00:54:20,720 --> 00:54:26,760
immediate family members did so we couldn't go down to visit our big family so we had
989
00:54:26,760 --> 00:54:34,080
to have like a thing at home but where we were all different rooms but yeah I don't
990
00:54:34,080 --> 00:54:37,920
have any exciting Christmas stories really I remember being oh one time on Christmas
991
00:54:37,920 --> 00:54:41,160
I was gonna kill myself and then an angel came down and showed me what the world would
992
00:54:41,160 --> 00:54:47,000
be like if I was never born so that was nice ever since then I've had a pretty sunny outlook
993
00:54:47,000 --> 00:54:52,680
on life but that's memorable there you go I kind of forgot about it but I don't think
994
00:54:52,680 --> 00:54:58,840
I really have any significant Christmas memories honestly it's just a day can we leave that
995
00:54:58,840 --> 00:55:06,320
in the podcast Liam are you what are you okay are you okay I'm fine I'm peachy keen I'm
996
00:55:06,320 --> 00:55:11,480
happy as can be I was freaking stoked in 2006 when I got my Xbox 360 for Christmas hell
997
00:55:11,480 --> 00:55:15,640
yeah brother it's like that picture of the the kid with the n64 he's all excited were
998
00:55:15,640 --> 00:55:22,440
you like that is there a photo of you getting the 360 I hope so there might be I should
999
00:55:22,440 --> 00:55:30,320
ask but I just I remember being really fucking excited and I think like the first couple
1000
00:55:30,320 --> 00:55:38,400
games I got might have been like Viva Piñata and Marvel Ultimate Alliance to oh man I love
1001
00:55:38,400 --> 00:55:43,800
Marvel Ultimate Alliance I have never played Viva Piñata though I always wanted to man
1002
00:55:43,800 --> 00:55:48,360
I always wished that I had it it seemed like a very weird game it was weird and it was
1003
00:55:48,360 --> 00:55:52,920
a lot of fun I have a game that's now that's kind of similar to it at least in vibe it's
1004
00:55:52,920 --> 00:55:57,800
a game called bug snacks you ever heard of it yep it's like a creature collector game
1005
00:55:57,800 --> 00:56:03,520
right sort of not really yes and no you're on an island full of like people and then
1006
00:56:03,520 --> 00:56:08,000
animals that are all like food they're like food objects you have like a bunger which
1007
00:56:08,000 --> 00:56:13,520
is like a burger bug I don't know how to describe it but you like capture the animals and then
1008
00:56:13,520 --> 00:56:19,560
feed them to people and then in some strange body horror twist of things their limbs become
1009
00:56:19,560 --> 00:56:23,480
a type of food similar to the one you fed to them like the people start turning into
1010
00:56:23,480 --> 00:56:28,480
food when you feed them to them that sounds really surreal and bizarre yes and you're
1011
00:56:28,480 --> 00:56:33,800
also like on the island investigating the disappearance of the previous scientist that
1012
00:56:33,800 --> 00:56:42,060
was there so it's a little dark but also wholesome I feel like I saw it had like overwhelmingly
1013
00:56:42,060 --> 00:56:47,040
positive reviews on steam oh it's phenomenal I highly recommend it great great steam deck
1014
00:56:47,040 --> 00:56:54,280
game to play if you're in bed is it like mind-numbing like stardew style game or it's not like
1015
00:56:54,280 --> 00:56:58,880
a farming sim but but yeah it is it is it is very relaxing like there's really very
1016
00:56:58,880 --> 00:57:02,660
little consequences just little puzzles you solve and you go around it's first person
1017
00:57:02,660 --> 00:57:10,260
game it's currently 65 percent off I have two like specific Christmas memories that
1018
00:57:10,260 --> 00:57:15,200
really stand out for like my childhood one of them wasn't even Christmas but the Christmas
1019
00:57:15,200 --> 00:57:19,760
tree was still up I would must have been like I must have been like three it's like one
1020
00:57:19,760 --> 00:57:24,760
of my earliest memories was me running out into the living room and being it was like
1021
00:57:24,760 --> 00:57:31,600
spring and me being like it's Christmas and it was like bright and sunny and warm as fuck
1022
00:57:31,600 --> 00:57:42,080
outside and it was not Christmas and then I had one from eighth eighth a memory from
1023
00:57:42,080 --> 00:57:49,280
eighth grade Christmas where I got a really bad ear infection and I got violently ill
1024
00:57:49,280 --> 00:57:55,640
and I threw up in my uncle's trash barrel and he just turned around to my mom and went
1025
00:57:55,640 --> 00:58:05,720
hey your son's throwing up in my barrel can we not have that that was like oh fucking
1026
00:58:05,720 --> 00:58:10,960
god and then I was sick for like two weeks I threw up at a Christmas party once too yeah
1027
00:58:10,960 --> 00:58:15,840
this is the one that I picked you up from what no you know what actually I changed my
1028
00:58:15,840 --> 00:58:21,840
mind I do have an adult Christmas memory that is that was nice I remember I was on the road
1029
00:58:21,840 --> 00:58:27,520
after picking up a friend of mine with another friend of mine and we it's the same one I've
1030
00:58:27,520 --> 00:58:33,040
told us the preceding story to this where my friend shit his pants when we when we arrived
1031
00:58:33,040 --> 00:58:38,760
in the neighborhood of my friend's father my other friend shit his pants and then had
1032
00:58:38,760 --> 00:58:45,720
to sneakily throw the underwear away by taking a phone call from his girlfriend but that
1033
00:58:45,720 --> 00:58:50,920
whole time was very surreal because we spent Christmas day with on the road well on the
1034
00:58:50,920 --> 00:58:59,080
road no because we were coming from the town of Midland Texas which was the I don't remember
1035
00:58:59,080 --> 00:59:02,600
if it's the hometown of George W Bush not the birthplace though he was born in Kennebunk
1036
00:59:02,600 --> 00:59:09,600
Port Maine but the the hometown is just an oil town basically and we woke up at a hotel
1037
00:59:09,600 --> 00:59:17,080
there then drove to San Antonio a couple hours away and just spent Christmas day there and
1038
00:59:17,080 --> 00:59:20,480
it was a very surreal experience to spend Christmas day with a bunch of people that
1039
00:59:20,480 --> 00:59:29,640
were very welcoming in their own words quote unquote not too Jesusy and just complete strangers
1040
00:59:29,640 --> 00:59:35,960
essentially and I also met my friend's grandpa who was not long for this world and did not
1041
00:59:35,960 --> 00:59:43,360
wish to be there and by there I mean San Antonio Texas and also alive so I think anybody really
1042
00:59:43,360 --> 00:59:49,000
wants to be in San Antonio Texas I actually quite like San Antonio I would go back if
1043
00:59:49,000 --> 00:59:54,320
I had the chance it was a very nice place the neighborhood we were in like staying in
1044
00:59:54,320 --> 00:59:58,960
was a little dystopian because it was so close together and like all these like two or three
1045
00:59:58,960 --> 01:00:03,000
story houses that were all very close together and relatively small and you don't have a
1046
01:00:03,000 --> 01:00:08,040
backyard at all but like the actual city of San Antonio is very nice have you been there
1047
01:00:08,040 --> 01:00:12,400
Cody no I've not oh well how do you speak ill of a place that you've never been how
1048
01:00:12,400 --> 01:00:16,440
do you speak ill of a place that you've also never been Liam but I've been to it the North
1049
01:00:16,440 --> 01:00:22,580
Pole I didn't speak ill of the North Pole you speak ill of the North Pole in private
1050
01:00:22,580 --> 01:00:29,440
conversation all the time I hear it you speak ill of it it's too cold and too crass too
1051
01:00:29,440 --> 01:00:35,560
evil for you I mean it is a brutal environment see Cody I have never I look I'm all for joking
1052
01:00:35,560 --> 01:00:44,140
Cody but I have lots of respect for Mr. Claus and to hear you come up with lies about things
1053
01:00:44,140 --> 01:00:50,640
that I supposedly said off microphone is low even for you and I just want to say I have
1054
01:00:50,640 --> 01:00:56,080
never said any ill words about the North Pole said bad things about England and I'll continue
1055
01:00:56,080 --> 01:01:00,400
saying bad things about England until one of you limey fucks comes over here to the
1056
01:01:00,400 --> 01:01:05,400
United States and socks me in the jaw for the things that I'm saying until then I will
1057
01:01:05,400 --> 01:01:09,400
continue to speak the truth about your people but I have never said anything bad about the
1058
01:01:09,400 --> 01:01:15,400
North Pole and I will say San Antonio is a beautiful city they got this Riverwalk which
1059
01:01:15,400 --> 01:01:19,400
is this nice little lit up walk they got a river that flows through it's like a little
1060
01:01:19,400 --> 01:01:23,580
canal throughout the city and they got all these restaurants and stuff I went to a really
1061
01:01:23,580 --> 01:01:30,320
shitty Irish pub on the Riverwalk there was a fingernail in my drink oh that is nice but
1062
01:01:30,320 --> 01:01:36,280
you know that's fine so gnarly it's all good I drank it did you I was gonna ask did you
1063
01:01:36,280 --> 01:01:40,480
drink it I drank it I didn't drink the fingernail I took the finger not a drink but why did
1064
01:01:40,480 --> 01:01:48,840
you still drink it alcohol alcohol is a disinfectant who cares I don't know the same page on this
1065
01:01:48,840 --> 01:01:54,160
one I mean if it's like a booger or something viscous it might be a different story but
1066
01:01:54,160 --> 01:01:58,440
it was a fucking fingernail whatever was it like probably broke off of the person who
1067
01:01:58,440 --> 01:02:02,100
was serving my drink to me I don't care yeah I was gonna ask was it like like a painted
1068
01:02:02,100 --> 01:02:06,320
fingernail or was it like no no it was just like it was like a tiny it's like a little
1069
01:02:06,320 --> 01:02:09,120
sliver of somebody's finger I did not it was like I knew what it was and I was like that's
1070
01:02:09,120 --> 01:02:15,960
gross but the place we were drinking it had like five dollar drinks I wasn't gonna complain
1071
01:02:15,960 --> 01:02:22,160
it's fair yeah fair enough anyway San Antonio beautiful but yeah that was a really nice
1072
01:02:22,160 --> 01:02:28,880
time it was nice to spend time with a very religious family of strangers who were tangentially
1073
01:02:28,880 --> 01:02:34,880
related to someone that I know that sounds that sounds kind of wholesome in a way though
1074
01:02:34,880 --> 01:02:39,840
it was it made me appreciate my own family dynamic and also just like the the welcoming
1075
01:02:39,840 --> 01:02:45,800
nature and the warmth of the people who we were visiting who like I mean even my friend
1076
01:02:45,800 --> 01:02:51,800
who's it was his father's family he didn't like know his dad really well but they still
1077
01:02:51,800 --> 01:02:57,880
welcomed us with open arms and it was very nice and I slept in a six-year-old's bunk
1078
01:02:57,880 --> 01:03:05,440
bed and that part wasn't nice yeah that sounds kind of cramped was it race I was no it was
1079
01:03:05,440 --> 01:03:09,520
it was bunk beds well that'd be good bunk race car beds yeah dude I'd be cool I'd be
1080
01:03:09,520 --> 01:03:12,840
like a double decker from like a fucking uh from like that's what you that's what you
1081
01:03:12,840 --> 01:03:19,400
and Austin are gonna have with this podcast pops off yeah well race car bunk beds no it's
1082
01:03:19,400 --> 01:03:24,840
gonna be like a like an English like an England like double bus style thing so there's one
1083
01:03:24,840 --> 01:03:29,240
race car bed but there's two there's an inner compartment yeah who gets the inner compartment
1084
01:03:29,240 --> 01:03:36,960
you were Austin me it's for whoever is mad at the other that's so true yeah well I mean
1085
01:03:36,960 --> 01:03:41,000
that was my memory that's my my beautiful Christmas memory I think Christmas is a wonderful
1086
01:03:41,000 --> 01:03:44,520
time that brings every holidays or a wonderful time that bring everyone together not just
1087
01:03:44,520 --> 01:03:48,440
Chris well sometimes include every holiday sometimes it brings people together but sometimes
1088
01:03:48,440 --> 01:03:54,320
it brings out the worst in people such as you ever work retail yeah that's what I was
1089
01:03:54,320 --> 01:04:00,320
gonna say ever what work retail no I have not actually ever had a retail job will you
1090
01:04:00,320 --> 01:04:05,520
believe that yeah I've worked service industry jobs I've worked plenty of food jobs I have
1091
01:04:05,520 --> 01:04:11,520
never done retail yeah I'm not a salesman I'm not very good at selling things it's a
1092
01:04:11,520 --> 01:04:17,080
time it's a time and yeah Cody's right it really does bring out the worst in people
1093
01:04:17,080 --> 01:04:22,840
yeah it do be like that it sounds like you have PTSD from it no I uh I'm I'm enjoying
1094
01:04:22,840 --> 01:04:27,160
Christmas again so I for the hot not for the holidays but just for shits and giggles I've
1095
01:04:27,160 --> 01:04:32,960
been going to malls these past couple weekends I really don't have anything to buy but like
1096
01:04:32,960 --> 01:04:41,320
just walking around them is fun I think and do people watch travel yes and let me tell
1097
01:04:41,320 --> 01:04:46,680
you there are people at malls and they are stinky but I one store I do like to go in
1098
01:04:46,680 --> 01:04:53,160
is lush I've talked about before it's a nice nice store with nice smells and I know that
1099
01:04:53,160 --> 01:04:56,880
they didn't run any Black Friday specials or anything on Black Friday so I guess there
1100
01:04:56,880 --> 01:05:01,160
were a lot of people that were like giving workers there a hard time like trying to oh
1101
01:05:01,160 --> 01:05:05,080
can I have the tester for half off oh can you give me your employee discount all that
1102
01:05:05,080 --> 01:05:09,880
type of stuff what the fuck I just think it's interesting that people are so entitled that
1103
01:05:09,880 --> 01:05:13,800
they think that just because it's a day where people can offer discounts that they must
1104
01:05:13,800 --> 01:05:21,760
that they have to yeah let me buy the floor model well if you've been to a lush or any
1105
01:05:21,760 --> 01:05:25,880
like equivalent sort of cosmetic store you know that that would be disgusting to take
1106
01:05:25,880 --> 01:05:29,680
one of those things home I used to work for Marshall's and I'll say that because there's
1107
01:05:29,680 --> 01:05:38,400
a million of them and it's a massive company and I used to work there I worked there for
1108
01:05:38,400 --> 01:05:45,840
too fucking long and every Black Friday there would customers would be like where are there
1109
01:05:45,840 --> 01:05:49,760
no discounts where are there no discounts like it's a discount store to begin with you
1110
01:05:49,760 --> 01:05:54,040
fucking idiot that's why you're here because you're poor and you can't afford your own
1111
01:05:54,040 --> 01:06:01,120
shit just fucking buy the stuff and leave get out of here just denigrating the the good
1112
01:06:01,120 --> 01:06:08,760
people of Marshall's me the good patrons of Marshall's yeah yeah some of them I it is
1113
01:06:08,760 --> 01:06:13,720
funny to go to a discount store to and expect discounts like going for it going to a good
1114
01:06:13,720 --> 01:06:18,680
will and being like yeah hey can I get that half off yeah can I get those lightly crap
1115
01:06:18,680 --> 01:06:25,120
jeans half off do you ever have customers that you like remember you're like you were
1116
01:06:25,120 --> 01:06:31,280
glad to see them oh yeah I when I did I was a pizza delivery driver one of my one of my
1117
01:06:31,280 --> 01:06:35,680
first like long term jobs that I had and I had people who would order from us every week
1118
01:06:35,680 --> 01:06:39,240
and I like I would love to take their order because they would tip well or they'd just
1119
01:06:39,240 --> 01:06:46,160
be nice and like I hung around in the town that I worked in to would you say I said it
1120
01:06:46,160 --> 01:06:50,360
was mostly for the money well it was mostly for the money but you know when you're working
1121
01:06:50,360 --> 01:06:55,560
a job like that like you need money yeah I wasn't getting paid shit basically if you
1122
01:06:55,560 --> 01:07:01,840
know if I wasn't doing deliveries I was getting paid minimum wage quote unquote but like tipping
1123
01:07:01,840 --> 01:07:08,280
is bullshit basically it's like 225 basically and then the difference between 225 and minimum
1124
01:07:08,280 --> 01:07:12,800
wage is what your boss makes up for like idle time yep and that's only if you don't already
1125
01:07:12,800 --> 01:07:17,960
surpass that from tips which you would even if you took like one delivery an hour yeah
1126
01:07:17,960 --> 01:07:22,160
which is you know not great shit so you're always looking out for the best tip but but
1127
01:07:22,160 --> 01:07:25,520
there there is truly something to be said you do even though you're not like talking
1128
01:07:25,520 --> 01:07:28,560
to people when you deliver food and I don't really think this is much of a thing since
1129
01:07:28,560 --> 01:07:33,280
covid because people just do door dash now and I don't think anybody even like comes
1130
01:07:33,280 --> 01:07:37,040
to the door for door dash and just drop food off and send you a picture yep so I don't
1131
01:07:37,040 --> 01:07:42,540
know what pizza delivery is like but I imagine it's somewhat similar that's changed yeah
1132
01:07:42,540 --> 01:07:46,560
but yeah I would hang out in the town that I worked in a lot and I would see the people
1133
01:07:46,560 --> 01:07:51,560
that I deliver food to and you do develop a rapport you know because people like hey
1134
01:07:51,560 --> 01:07:56,680
pizza guy pizza guy it's our fucking pizza guy and that's doubly true when I when I work
1135
01:07:56,680 --> 01:08:00,520
counter service at the late night pizza place because then you're getting people who are
1136
01:08:00,520 --> 01:08:06,240
getting drunk every weekend out on the town who are coming in at 12 12 30 at night being
1137
01:08:06,240 --> 01:08:12,000
like hell yeah getting pizza and then they'll recognize you when you're around yeah you're
1138
01:08:12,000 --> 01:08:18,880
a light you're a lifesaver is what you are I used to have this dude that would come in
1139
01:08:18,880 --> 01:08:25,960
his name was Dave and he was like the most you ever do you ever meet someone whose voice
1140
01:08:25,960 --> 01:08:35,480
just like instantly calms you sort of jigglypuff effect on you yeah and he was always having
1141
01:08:35,480 --> 01:08:43,600
his name is Adam Wow thanks man his name is Dave and out like I'd be like oh hey Dave
1142
01:08:43,600 --> 01:08:48,080
how you doing and he was like you know man you know I went to a comic book store earlier
1143
01:08:48,080 --> 01:08:54,720
and I did all the stuff I worked on my car and now I'm just here to grab some socks because
1144
01:08:54,720 --> 01:09:00,200
I was walking around the house and I could feel the hardwood floor on the heel of my
1145
01:09:00,200 --> 01:09:09,040
foot and I'm like yeah Dave yeah you you keep talking to me for a little bit just you just
1146
01:09:09,040 --> 01:09:14,560
you just keep speaking to me but he sounds like a cartoon turtle he kind of looks like
1147
01:09:14,560 --> 01:09:21,160
a cartoon turtle that's what I figured I figured you'd say that he was a he was so funny he
1148
01:09:21,160 --> 01:09:26,940
was so nice another contender for a Santa replacement Dave a turtle no I meant cartoon
1149
01:09:26,940 --> 01:09:33,520
turtle but Dave too he could be Dave the cartoon turtle Dave Dave David Claus Dave the cartoon
1150
01:09:33,520 --> 01:09:38,660
turtle does sound like a like a Christmas mascot to me he sure does I saw him a handful
1151
01:09:38,660 --> 01:09:44,360
of years later and I was like Dave how's your life how's how's your how's your daughter
1152
01:09:44,360 --> 01:09:50,560
doing how's how's the family and he goes my wife divorced me and my daughter doesn't look
1153
01:09:50,560 --> 01:09:59,920
at me the same way anymore did you have to share that yeah I did I'm still soothed well
1154
01:09:59,920 --> 01:10:04,960
now I'm striking Dave the cartoon turtle for as an option for mascots because now if I
1155
01:10:04,960 --> 01:10:12,800
think about him I'm just gonna get depressed yeah that doesn't work anymore thanks I hope
1156
01:10:12,800 --> 01:10:19,200
Dave's doing well and I also hope that he finds this podcast and he emails me at Cody's
1157
01:10:19,200 --> 01:10:25,400
real email at gmail.com and we can catch up have a drink and hopefully he's mended his
1158
01:10:25,400 --> 01:10:33,580
family life and yeah Dave the cartoons oh loft turtle I hope that people who aren't
1159
01:10:33,580 --> 01:10:39,080
already familiar with Cody find this podcast and email us at the previously said email
1160
01:10:39,080 --> 01:10:43,800
and give us your input tell us about any funny dreams you might have had any cool inventions
1161
01:10:43,800 --> 01:10:48,380
that you've thought of for things that we should talk about so does it should be reviewed
1162
01:10:48,380 --> 01:10:56,760
on the Soda Report or anything else of relevance send us some memes no don't send us memes
1163
01:10:56,760 --> 01:11:01,480
please don't send us memes I'd rather you send a picture of your cock like if you're
1164
01:11:01,480 --> 01:11:05,480
gonna if you're gonna fill our inbox with useless shit at least have some work put into
1165
01:11:05,480 --> 01:11:14,280
it yeah also send us other ideas for Santa mascots yeah we want to hear what your animal
1166
01:11:14,280 --> 01:11:21,520
or person is yeah or entity maybe it's a yeti what if it's well the yeti's real Adam so
1167
01:11:21,520 --> 01:11:30,080
on that note bye hey if you uh should we god damn it Adam every time we gotta say this
1168
01:11:30,080 --> 01:11:36,200
stuff we already said it we already said to email us what more needs to be said like subscribe
1169
01:11:36,200 --> 01:11:41,520
share with your co-worker if you want to talk if you want to if you want to talk to your
1170
01:11:41,520 --> 01:11:47,720
friend at the water bubbler at work mention the podcast tell him to mention it to someone
1171
01:11:47,720 --> 01:11:56,600
else the giving tree that yeah you know extend the olive branch that is the learner's permit
1172
01:11:56,600 --> 01:12:01,880
podcast yeah ever heard of a mark multi-level marketing scheme just that but it's podcast
1173
01:12:01,880 --> 01:12:07,120
yeah yeah but it's a podcast and nobody makes money not even us except Cody somehow I don't
1174
01:12:07,120 --> 01:12:12,440
I definitely don't while you're at it you can leave a rating or a review or share it
1175
01:12:12,440 --> 01:12:20,400
on social media you know just we want to engage with you we you know we miss you I love you
1176
01:12:20,400 --> 01:12:27,520
please come back yeah and we'll be back next week for a very special post Christmas episode
1177
01:12:27,520 --> 01:12:36,640
yes post Christmas episode with mascots galore four separate mascots and hopefully Austin
1178
01:12:36,640 --> 01:12:41,720
will be bringing a mascot to the table that's why I said for them what do you mean what
1179
01:12:41,720 --> 01:12:45,600
do you mean what I mean exactly what do you mean because we're gonna have our own that
1180
01:12:45,600 --> 01:12:51,880
I'm sister will make and then no you're talking about the Christmas mascots I'm talking about
1181
01:12:51,880 --> 01:12:56,720
the show mascot yeah that's what I said with format I said for the three and then Austin's
1182
01:12:56,720 --> 01:13:03,600
one okay well I wasn't expecting to put Adam's sister to work so I apologize to her yeah
1183
01:13:03,600 --> 01:13:08,760
she hasn't even agreed to this yet well apparently apparently I'm making money from this sauce
1184
01:13:08,760 --> 01:13:17,360
I'll throw something that way I guess and we'll make it happen hmm or whatever all right
1185
01:13:17,360 --> 01:13:27,920
well till next time thanks for listening bye bye bye your mic peaked on discord fuck you've
1186
01:13:27,920 --> 01:13:38,680
been listening to learners permit thanks for listening we hope you learned something today
1187
01:13:38,680 --> 01:13:58,680
till next time goodbye