Unlocking Olympic-Level Success: Joey Lye on Goal Setting and Resilience | Ep. 172

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Welcome, welcome, welcome. I
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am so excited for the conversation that I am about to share with you all.
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I have with me someone who is absolutely phenomenal and is going to offer some
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really unique perspectives on goal setting and planning for y'all.
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I have with me Joey Lai and Joey is the Chief Empowerment Officer and founder of Joey Lai LLC.
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And this company's mission is to to challenge mindset, share perspective,
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and inspire intentional growth.
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Joey is a TEDx speaker, an Olympic bronze medalist, and does some amazing work
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around leadership, championship culture, and mindset.
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She's an expert when it comes to that. And so I can't wait to have her share
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her story with you all and for us to dig into all of this wonderful goodness. So let's do this.
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Do you want to feel less scattered and more focused, but the idea of goal-setting
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sounds like adding more pressure to your already pressure-filled life?
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If so, welcome to the Plan Goal Plan podcast. I'm Danielle McGue.
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I'm a professor, mom, planner addict, and recovering overachiever.
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After years of hustle and grind, I was tired of trying harder.
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I was ready to try easier.
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At the intersection of research, practice, and play, I found a purposeful path
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to planning and goal setting that is fun, simple, and sustainable.
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If you're ready to try easier, if you're ready to make memories and do meaningful work, grab a pen.
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I will equip you with tools and practices to clarify purpose,
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reclaim time, and achieve goals, playfully and lightly. Let's get started.
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Welcome, welcome, welcome. I'm so glad that you're here, Joey.
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Thank you so much for having me, Danielle.
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I'm excited to be here and share a little bit of my story with you. Absolutely.
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So like, let's start there. Tell me your story. Tell me, you know,
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I'm really interested in, you know, one, what's it just like to be an athlete at that level?
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But I'm also really interested in this transition of all of the skills and the
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knowledge that you gain being a high performer as an athlete and how the transition
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has been into taking that into working with people and leadership in the workplace.
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Place. So yeah, tell me your story.
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I'll start at eight years old. I had a third grade teacher who asked us to write
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a letter to our future selves.
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She held on to that letter and mailed it to us many years later.
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I was just about to graduate from high school and this letter appeared and it
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was my third grade self saying that I want to be a professional athlete.
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I had set that goal from such a young age. I had been working towards it.
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I was then at a high school that specialized in sport training,
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weightlifting, speed work.
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I have a autobiography that I wrote in high school and I titled it Future Olympian.
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So I just like to share those two little pieces of my youth because it shows
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how deeply rooted my goal of becoming an Olympian was.
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A lot of people had a lot of opinions about what that journey should look like.
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One of the things I'm most proud of my My former self for is sticking true to
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me and what I wanted out of my experience as I went through life.
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Growing up in Toronto, there wasn't a lot of information given to us at that
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time about pursuing sport in the U.S.
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I wanted to come play in the U.S. I learned that you can continue your sport
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career there and it'd be such a great opportunity. And all of these people started participating.
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Pouring in their opinions saying you should go D1. The only way to get where
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you want to go is to play Division I.
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What I decided as a high schooler was I want to get the best education I can
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while playing two sports that I love, softball and hockey.
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I let those two things dictate my college search, ended up at a small Division
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III school in Massachusetts called Williams College, where I was very challenged
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academically and got an amazing degree,
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had an incredible experience, experience and went on to graduate with a degree in psychology.
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My parents signed me up for a Team Canada tryout. There were open tryouts that year.
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I showed up at the tryout shaking in my boots. I had allowed society to tell
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me that Division III wasn't good enough. So I showed up wondering kind of why I was there.
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Was I wasting my time? You know, I hadn't prepared in the way that everybody
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tells you you should prepare.
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By the end of that open tryout, I'd been invited to the final camp.
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I got through that final camp, started getting more comfortable,
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started gaining that confidence back, started thinking maybe I can do this.
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And I ended up being one of the final cuts.
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That was a huge moment in my life. It really tested my resilience.
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It tested how badly do you want this goal? How much work are you willing to
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put in to put the jersey on to represent your country? I went back to my alma mater.
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I was working there. I started my coaching journey there, did everything I could,
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used every resource I had, went back the following year to the open tryout,
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ended up getting invited to the final camp and making the team and had a 12-year
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career, all the while coaching in the college world as well.
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Up until the pandemic, Olympic delay.
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We had that year delay for the Tokyo Olympics, which was another huge test.
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And then obviously getting to fulfill that dream of being an Olympian and stepping
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onto the podium with my teammates.
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And what an incredible journey. There's so many stories I could share from that journey.
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Then we get to that point where the Olympics are over, your dream has been achieved.
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Now what? And that transition piece, as you brought up, is an extremely challenging
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one for a lot of people in different stages of life.
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And I think as a high-performing athlete, having achieved that goal and coming
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off that high, making history for your country, now deciding...
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What's next. That was a huge, huge part of, again, testing me as a person and
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figuring out what do I really want to get out of this next chapter in my life.
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So figuring that out was definitely a journey. And one of the things that I
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realized was I love impacting people and that I had learned so many lessons
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along the way throughout my Olympic journey, through coaching,
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through being a teammate, being a leader on the team.
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And I was able to pull all of those lessons into a business that I've now created
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to inspire and help and challenge other leaders.
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That's amazing. I think there's so much in your story to unpack there.
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You know, one thing that strikes me is the way in which you had so many supportive
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people around you on your journey.
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Like I want to high five your third grade teacher for doing that activity and
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then like following through on it, like how powerful of an experience that had
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to who have been, you know, your parents signing you up for the tryouts, you know.
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And then I'm also really struck by these moments of, okay, I'm at these tryouts.
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I don't really know if I deserve to be here.
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And then having this moment where you get so close, right?
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And, you know, we have these moments where sometimes we aren't sure what we want.
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And then we get really close to it and doesn't happen. And that's when we're
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like, oh, no, I'm going for that.
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And, you know, I feel that I've had those moments in my life.
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And, you know, to hear that, you know, an Olympian athlete, you know,
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like also, you know, has had those moments is really interesting.
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And then also these moments where you do achieve the dream, then you have the
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sort of, oh, gosh, well, like, now what moment?
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And, you know, I'm really interested in kind of unpacking those three things
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of, you know, support and when it feels like you didn't quite make the goal.
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And then that moment of, oh, I did make the goal. Now what?
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The support was absolutely necessary.
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I think I talk a lot about you can't,
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anywhere in life that is worth being proud of without support from others.
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You can't achieve your biggest dreams without other people in your corner,
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whether that is family or friends or strangers.
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The number of strangers that helped me along my journey, I couldn't even count
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them for you right now. It is incredible.
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When and if you're willing to ask a question, reach your hand out asking for
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help, people want to be a part of that.
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People want to be a part of a passionate journey to help others achieve great things.
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And I encourage anybody listening who maybe doesn't have an intentional support
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system to start thinking, who's one person I can reach out to today that can
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help me get a little bit further within my goal?
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Yeah, yeah, I love that. And because I do think, particularly as women,
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we can be so hesitant to ask for help.
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I mean, I think that men also struggle with this, but for slightly different reasons.
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I think that, you know in some ways we've been taught to
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be the helpers not the one that is help and so
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you know it can take it can really feel vulnerable
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to learn how to go hey there's
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something that I want to achieve that's vulnerable in and of itself but then
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to say and I don't know that I can do it on my own who's out there to help me
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so I love that that like people want to be part of that journey and they want
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to be part of that story and so to give them an opportunity to do that I think
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is really important too.
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So tell me a little bit, because I'm sure that you had other,
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I almost reached my goal, but not quite moments or other moments that felt like failure.
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You know, what helped you get back up and motivate yourself to try again and go after it again?
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I think, as you mentioned, narrowly missing a goal gives you a big gut check
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of and a big reality check of how badly did I want this, right?
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The more disappointed you are, the more Or you realize that it's really what
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you're searching for. It's what you're working for. It's what you want.
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So for me, those moments, yes, they're disappointing.
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And they kind of helped me reassess that I'm on the right track.
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I went back after getting so close and getting sent home, getting handed that
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plane ticket in that meeting instead of a roster spot.
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I looked around me and said, how can I dig deeper? I went in the weight room,
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you know, three or four times a week. I was conditioning.
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I was eating well. I was getting to practice early and staying late,
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having coaches and other athletes help me train. I was begging my head coach
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to write me into practice as much as possible so I could continue getting reps
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that were going to help the team get better as well.
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The sprint coach on campus, I reached out to him and I said,
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hey, would you mind meeting up with me at the track and helping me with my starts?
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Like literally anything I could do to get a little bit better,
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I did that and utilized the resources. And I think that sometimes when we get
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what we want right away, we don't think outside the box. We don't use our resources.
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The saying that I have grasped onto is adapt and thrive.
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Anytime a challenge comes my way, obviously, yes, there's disappointment and
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frustration in the challenge, but I've trained my brain to jump right to that
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phrase, adapt and thrive. OK, so I didn't get what I want or it didn't go how I wanted it to.
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How can I adapt my mindset or my approach or a behavior in order to thrive in the long run?
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So I think challenges and not getting what we want really allow our true passion,
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our true work ethic to to come forward.
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Yeah, I really I really like that because I think that it's so easy to believe
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that if you need to adapt.
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That you're not cut out for it or that you're not good enough when actually,
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you know, it's just a sign that you maybe need to expand your resources and change your strategy.
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Strategy and that it's not, there's a lot of research that shows that when,
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when things kind of don't go as planned for women,
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they see it as a sign that they're just not cut out for it, as opposed to a
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result of the circumstances or them needing to change their approach,
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where like men are much more likely to go like, oh, I'm awesome.
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Like it just was, I need to shift up my approach.
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And so like, you know, when I think about working with women around goal setting,
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it is like, okay, when things don't go as planned, we just need to this shift
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our approach, that's not a sign that you're not cut out for it.
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And so I really like adapt and thrive, adapt and thrive.
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You know, one of my biggest moments, and this is kind of personal and pretty
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deep, but I want my listeners to know that, you know, if you're not an athlete,
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that there are all these ways that this like applies to you.
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And so, you know, for me, I didn't know that I wanted to be a parent until I
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was in like my mid thirties. I was just like, oh, you know, I've already got
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a really intense career.
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I'm busy enough. Do I really want to add anything else to my plate?
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And it actually wasn't until, you know, I miscarried the first time that I was
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like, yep, this is what I want. And.
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You know, like you described, I was like, OK, I need to learn about my body now.
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I need to figure out what's going on. And there is like such a deep commitment
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after that to I want to be a parent and I want to do it well.
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And like learning about my body.
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You're right that if that hadn't
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happened, I probably wouldn't have sought out support in other ways.
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I also probably wouldn't have learned certain things about myself.
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And so it is those moments are incredibly clarifying. Absolutely.
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Setbacks often give us that clarity that we don't have or cause us to think
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in just a little bit of a different way.
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Yeah. So I know that one of the things that you are phenomenal at is thinking
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through mindset and the importance of mindset and achieving those goals.
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So can you tell me a little bit about, you know, what are some of the most practical
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feet on the ground mindset things that people could do to help them if you're kind of struggling?
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Absolutely. I think People who meet me now in life, they assume I've been confident my whole life.
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That is a daily battle for me. It's something that I have worked on for so many
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years and continue to work on every single day.
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Two of the things that helped me a ton were breathwork and self-talk,
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being intentional with those two things.
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I started off by setting a timer on my phone every night for one minute and focusing on my breath.
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It was something that was achievable. It didn't feel overwhelming.
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I could do it, you know, the second I get into bed, help me kind of calm down from the day.
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And that practice of connecting with my breath helped me on the field.
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And now in life, when stressful situations are coming about,
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I can reconnect with my breath and kind of feel that calmness.
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Through that one minute, my mind wandered a ton. I couldn't even tell you how many times it
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is able to wander in one minute. And the practice of noticing that and coming
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back to the moment was so, so helpful and is so helpful for just my brain's
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ability to be present in the moment and to reconnect with myself.
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Self-talk wise, I think most of us have a natural tendency to talk to ourselves
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pretty terribly, right?
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When things aren't going perfectly, we are so cruel to ourselves.
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Whereas we think about when somebody else has a struggle or a hiccup or makes
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a mistake, we're right there saying to them, you've got this. Don't worry about it.
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Everything's going to be fine, right? It's such a different narrative.
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What I did was I started practicing positive self-talk while brushing my teeth.
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Every time I picked up that toothbrush, that was a reminder for me to look myself
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dead in the eye in the mirror and tell myself how great I was,
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how badass I was, that I was going to go get this goal.
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I was going to work hard today. I was going to put in the effort.
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I was going to be the best version of myself, get one percent better.
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Just practicing that narrative was so impactful.
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Noticing the times of day that my brain kind of jumped to that negative place
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in all of the different things that we were doing in preparation for the Olympics.
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If I was doing a conditioning drill on a treadmill, that's that was the worst time to be in my brain.
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I do not enjoy running. And then you're asking me to run in place like I'm not
00:15:56.390 --> 00:15:59.130
going anywhere, my brain took a pretty bad place.
00:15:59.450 --> 00:16:04.150
So being able to notice those moments and intentionally switching from,
00:16:04.210 --> 00:16:05.690
oh my goodness, I don't want to be here.
00:16:05.750 --> 00:16:09.990
Why do I have to do this? To, no, I'm going to attack this challenge.
00:16:10.210 --> 00:16:13.190
I'm going to get after this today. This is going to help me be better.
00:16:13.350 --> 00:16:16.930
I am going to beat this treadmill. I'm going to win right here.
00:16:17.070 --> 00:16:21.790
And so those two things, the breathwork and the self-talk, that awareness of
00:16:22.186 --> 00:16:27.286
working on those tools and then noticing places within my every day that I could
00:16:27.286 --> 00:16:29.166
kind of pull those tools into my life.
00:16:29.306 --> 00:16:33.606
Both of those things are such practical and achievable things,
00:16:33.726 --> 00:16:36.586
right? Let's start with one minute and pay attention to our breath.
00:16:36.766 --> 00:16:40.186
Let's talk to ourself in kind ways while we brush our teeth.
00:16:40.366 --> 00:16:45.766
And I, you know, I really, really like that. And I like that then that translates
00:16:45.766 --> 00:16:49.146
into becoming aware in other places.
00:16:49.366 --> 00:16:53.986
And how do you just like pay attention to when those negative self-talk does creep in.
00:16:54.186 --> 00:16:58.386
I love that you started by talking about how, you know, people think that you
00:16:58.386 --> 00:17:01.206
must just be this really positive, confident person.
00:17:01.406 --> 00:17:05.586
I have a client who is so phenomenally successful.
00:17:06.006 --> 00:17:10.966
It's so interesting for me to like work with her because she is like,
00:17:11.066 --> 00:17:17.046
I have negative self-talk every single morning and I have to catch myself and
00:17:17.126 --> 00:17:22.426
rewire myself to talk to myself differently every single morning. I was like, really, you?
00:17:22.686 --> 00:17:26.946
Like, you're so positive all of the time. And to sort of say that,
00:17:27.166 --> 00:17:31.906
you know, even for the people that it appears to be easy, they're doing a lot
00:17:31.906 --> 00:17:35.466
of work over and over and over again to get there.
00:17:35.706 --> 00:17:41.326
And I know like being trained as an academic, I had realized that many of the
00:17:41.326 --> 00:17:44.946
ways that you were taught like as a student to be considered smart in class
00:17:44.946 --> 00:17:46.126
is like, here's your reading.
00:17:46.126 --> 00:17:49.306
Well what is it that you can kind of pick apart that
00:17:49.306 --> 00:17:52.506
the author said and I had really trained my
00:17:52.506 --> 00:17:55.506
brain to find problems with things that other
00:17:55.506 --> 00:17:58.906
people were saying and that like my value then
00:17:58.906 --> 00:18:04.466
was in pointing out those problems and maybe offering a solution sometimes maybe
00:18:04.466 --> 00:18:08.926
not even the solution part sometimes and I realized that that had creeped into
00:18:08.926 --> 00:18:13.326
the way that my brain had worked in all parts of my life so I was doing that
00:18:13.326 --> 00:18:16.426
to my husband I was doing that with my kids I was doing that with myself.
00:18:17.181 --> 00:18:22.641
And, you know, I had to really break myself and say that identifying problems
00:18:22.641 --> 00:18:26.301
isn't always the most valuable thing that I can offer.
00:18:26.521 --> 00:18:31.501
And it's been a whole complete retraining where I don't want to like ignore problems, right?
00:18:31.641 --> 00:18:37.921
But I also know that that wasn't healthy thinking for me. And so I think about that so, so, so, so much.
00:18:38.061 --> 00:18:42.821
So I want to go to this transition that you talked about, you know,
00:18:42.821 --> 00:18:48.561
moving from, hey, I just accomplished a huge life goal, like a goal that I was
00:18:48.561 --> 00:18:50.801
speaking into existence in third grade.
00:18:50.901 --> 00:18:53.101
And now I've done it. Now what?
00:18:53.261 --> 00:18:56.941
You know, tell me a little bit about how you move through that.
00:18:57.201 --> 00:19:02.781
For probably about four months after the Olympics ended, after coming down off
00:19:02.781 --> 00:19:04.461
the high, you know, we had lots of celebrations.
00:19:04.641 --> 00:19:07.061
We got flown out pretty quickly because it was the pandemic.
00:19:07.161 --> 00:19:11.201
So getting back to the Athletes Village at 2 a.m. after the medal ceremony.
00:19:11.581 --> 00:19:16.341
I was on a bus at 6 a.m. that same morning to come home, went,
00:19:16.421 --> 00:19:20.641
flew straight to a wedding, got to celebrate a friend, you know, show off the hardware,
00:19:20.901 --> 00:19:24.141
was at home for about a week, lots of celebrations with people,
00:19:24.301 --> 00:19:28.941
went to the homeland to visit my family, another week of celebrations.
00:19:29.221 --> 00:19:32.841
And then coming down off that high, the next four months was pretty tough.
00:19:33.001 --> 00:19:37.521
Like, what is my purpose in life now? I've done this. I...
00:19:37.769 --> 00:19:42.709
Will I ever feel that high again, right? Will I ever achieve anything that great again?
00:19:42.949 --> 00:19:48.469
And the realization that maybe not is pretty tough to digest and swallow.
00:19:48.749 --> 00:19:53.329
I was lucky enough to be around some of my teammates for about six weeks during that time.
00:19:53.429 --> 00:19:57.389
And the four of us would get together once a week and just talk about how sad
00:19:57.389 --> 00:20:02.609
we were and talk about how tough this time of our life was and just allow ourselves
00:20:02.609 --> 00:20:07.869
to feel that sadness and to feel the uncertainty of,
00:20:08.009 --> 00:20:11.349
will we ever feel as though we have a purpose again?
00:20:11.629 --> 00:20:16.909
I think allowing myself to feel that and not trying to force myself to jump
00:20:16.909 --> 00:20:19.329
right into something new right away was great.
00:20:19.549 --> 00:20:25.129
As I sat in or laid in bed most mornings, you know, not really wanting to get out of bed.
00:20:25.229 --> 00:20:29.249
Thankfully, one of my dogs was with me, so I had to get out to take him outside.
00:20:29.529 --> 00:20:34.549
But as I sat around, I started to think, you know, what did I love most about coaching sports?
00:20:34.889 --> 00:20:38.329
What did I love most about working in the college space? And it was the impact
00:20:38.329 --> 00:20:42.849
on others. Is there a different way I can channel that same purpose?
00:20:43.149 --> 00:20:46.789
It might look really different. I'm not going to be training on the field every
00:20:46.789 --> 00:20:50.169
single day. I'm not going to be now coaching people on the field every single day.
00:20:50.309 --> 00:20:54.309
How and where can I have that impact? And so I just started very slowly.
00:20:54.509 --> 00:20:57.649
I didn't dive into my business wholeheartedly from the get-go.
00:20:57.749 --> 00:21:02.689
Started working on a website a little bit and just talking to some friends and
00:21:02.689 --> 00:21:05.409
former colleagues who were still in the college space to say,
00:21:05.509 --> 00:21:09.349
hey, is this something you would hire me to do to come in and share some of
00:21:09.349 --> 00:21:10.329
the lessons that I've learned?
00:21:10.329 --> 00:21:13.229
So that kind of came together slowly, piece by piece.
00:21:13.269 --> 00:21:18.629
And probably eight months after the Olympics had ended, I had put together an
00:21:18.629 --> 00:21:23.749
LLC, had reached out again, just started creating a support system to help me
00:21:23.749 --> 00:21:25.609
kind of get this off the ground.
00:21:25.749 --> 00:21:29.069
Learned that there's a small business development center and they have offices
00:21:29.069 --> 00:21:32.029
all over the country and give free business consulting.
00:21:32.269 --> 00:21:38.249
That was incredible to learn. So it almost started mirroring my athletic journey of, okay, what
00:21:38.517 --> 00:21:43.177
what is it that I want? What do I love doing? And now do I have a system of
00:21:43.177 --> 00:21:45.197
people around me who can support me?
00:21:45.297 --> 00:21:48.617
Can I learn what this system might look like? Can I meet some new people?
00:21:48.657 --> 00:21:53.797
Can I get some new resources and started kind of building and just allowing
00:21:53.797 --> 00:21:58.817
myself to have a slow build in that and to understand that I didn't become an Olympian overnight.
00:21:59.077 --> 00:22:02.657
I wasn't going to have a booming business overnight. Can I start to put small
00:22:02.657 --> 00:22:08.237
pieces together that I won't get overwhelmed by, but it'll start building something that I'm proud of.
00:22:08.337 --> 00:22:15.297
I love that you gave yourself space to really explore and to see this as a process
00:22:15.297 --> 00:22:20.937
and a journey that you had that in your athletic career as well.
00:22:21.017 --> 00:22:26.197
And it happened over time. And so that this nice transition is also going to take time.
00:22:26.337 --> 00:22:33.637
And I really don't think that we talk enough about the fall that happens after
00:22:33.637 --> 00:22:39.797
an achievement because it is really hard to do something at such a high level.
00:22:39.917 --> 00:22:46.237
It requires so much focus and so much of all of your life goes into that that
00:22:46.237 --> 00:22:51.057
it's really difficult to not intertwine our achievements and our identity.
00:22:51.297 --> 00:22:54.517
And what I love is that you, one, had friends
00:22:54.517 --> 00:22:57.457
going through it with you and that you gave yourself
00:22:57.457 --> 00:23:00.677
space to sort of more to achievement because like
00:23:00.677 --> 00:23:03.657
that's also something we don't talk about so like there might be grief
00:23:03.657 --> 00:23:06.997
attached to achieving things and not
00:23:06.997 --> 00:23:09.757
just in the sacrifice of achieving things but
00:23:09.757 --> 00:23:12.917
actually in the achievement things and you
00:23:12.917 --> 00:23:16.117
know that in that moment you also asked
00:23:16.117 --> 00:23:19.577
yourself where are the transferable skills where
00:23:19.577 --> 00:23:22.517
are the things that are you but they're not necessarily
00:23:22.517 --> 00:23:25.277
connected to the activity right that you
00:23:25.277 --> 00:23:27.977
can put that in other places I know I went through a
00:23:27.977 --> 00:23:31.017
similar thing you know with teaching I you know earned tenure and
00:23:31.017 --> 00:23:33.717
I was like oh now I get to kind of choose what to
00:23:33.717 --> 00:23:39.477
do with my career and I had no idea and I've had to really go yes I'm a teacher
00:23:39.477 --> 00:23:44.257
but how I teach might be in the classroom but it also might be coaching people
00:23:44.257 --> 00:23:49.597
one-on-one it might be this podcast it might be public speaking and that how
00:23:49.597 --> 00:23:52.757
I teach shifts and evolves as well and so So,
00:23:52.757 --> 00:23:55.877
you know, kind of to recognize that that's in you,
00:23:56.017 --> 00:24:00.277
but not attached to the achievement that you made is so empowering.
00:24:00.557 --> 00:24:05.717
So, you know, I have some just questions about the ways that I know that goal
00:24:05.717 --> 00:24:08.677
setting is such a huge thing in athletics.
00:24:09.057 --> 00:24:13.057
And but how you might go about it might be a little bit different or,
00:24:13.077 --> 00:24:16.237
you know, like thinking about, you know, I have some good friends that work
00:24:16.237 --> 00:24:19.317
in athletics at the university that I'm at.
00:24:19.317 --> 00:24:23.217
And, you know, the way that you can like yell at people on the field is so different
00:24:23.217 --> 00:24:27.157
than the way that you might yell at and encourage someone in the office.
00:24:27.197 --> 00:24:31.037
So can you tell me a little bit about like, what are some of the things that
00:24:31.037 --> 00:24:32.897
you're like, oh, this works so well?
00:24:33.413 --> 00:24:39.473
To take from, you know, the environment of athletics and move it into other contexts.
00:24:39.713 --> 00:24:43.393
And like, here's something that like, nope, we just ain't doing that here.
00:24:43.673 --> 00:24:48.313
I think for me, the three pillars that I've kind of carried with me are leadership,
00:24:48.493 --> 00:24:49.913
mindset, and team culture.
00:24:50.173 --> 00:24:55.533
Those things that I learned about, was immersed in during my athletic journey
00:24:55.533 --> 00:25:02.253
are so transferable to every other space in life, to just my everyday life, to the business world.
00:25:02.253 --> 00:25:07.793
Old, building a team within a corporation is so similar to building a team on the field.
00:25:07.953 --> 00:25:12.493
Obviously, the activity is very different. You still need to build trust.
00:25:12.573 --> 00:25:15.173
You still need amazing and clear communication.
00:25:15.513 --> 00:25:19.673
You still need values and an understanding of what those values look like.
00:25:19.793 --> 00:25:23.653
And so I think being able to understand the things that made us successful as
00:25:23.653 --> 00:25:27.373
Team Canada softball, coming from when I joined the team in 2010,
00:25:27.673 --> 00:25:31.733
the culture that that team had was not going to win us a medal at the Olympics.
00:25:31.773 --> 00:25:37.593
And the intentional work that went into Roop and evolved over time is what made us successful.
00:25:38.033 --> 00:25:41.733
That's true in businesses too. You see some of the most successful companies
00:25:41.733 --> 00:25:46.333
out there and how they interact with their clients, how they interact with other
00:25:46.333 --> 00:25:50.253
people within their company, how they communicate, the clarity that exists there.
00:25:50.433 --> 00:25:54.973
So that's something that I have found a lot of joy in bringing from my athletic
00:25:54.973 --> 00:26:01.773
career into the business world and helping leaders within their organization understand the tools.
00:26:02.173 --> 00:26:05.693
The different personalities that are present, the different communication styles,
00:26:05.833 --> 00:26:11.233
and how much that impacts the building of trust within a team.
00:26:11.413 --> 00:26:15.253
Yeah, I think that when we think about goals, a lot of times we approach it
00:26:15.253 --> 00:26:21.653
from this very smart goal, let's collect data, let's have milestone kind of place.
00:26:21.673 --> 00:26:24.953
And things like culture, team culture team
00:26:24.953 --> 00:26:28.093
building trust feel like very soft skills and
00:26:28.093 --> 00:26:31.133
so I think sometimes too we don't
00:26:31.133 --> 00:26:37.333
think about how we can make those goals that we can set and that you can also
00:26:37.333 --> 00:26:41.993
you know I'm always like these are my wishy-washy goals right and that we need
00:26:41.993 --> 00:26:47.593
those too and that there are ways that you can make sometimes I'm like we have
00:26:47.593 --> 00:26:50.333
our to-do goals and we have our to-be goals and how are
00:26:50.393 --> 00:26:53.353
we going to be together and as a team
00:26:53.353 --> 00:26:56.073
so that then we can achieve these other things and that
00:26:56.073 --> 00:26:59.113
is integral to the process and so
00:26:59.113 --> 00:27:02.613
you know how have you found people like
00:27:02.613 --> 00:27:07.513
have you found it more difficult to move people through some of that team building
00:27:07.513 --> 00:27:12.773
and trust and that culture building aspects versus maybe like some of the this
00:27:12.773 --> 00:27:16.593
is what we're going to accomplish goals yeah I think presenting it in a way
00:27:16.593 --> 00:27:22.113
of understanding that there is a big tangible goal that we want to reach.
00:27:22.233 --> 00:27:27.453
And then what does that look like within our daily behaviors in order to work toward that goal?
00:27:27.613 --> 00:27:30.053
So yes, we can have that huge goal, just like.
00:27:30.406 --> 00:27:33.706
We as Team Canada, our goal was to win the gold medal at the Olympics.
00:27:33.926 --> 00:27:38.046
That was our goal. Did we achieve it? Not quite. We ended up still making history
00:27:38.046 --> 00:27:39.586
for our country, which was really cool.
00:27:39.806 --> 00:27:46.806
But we did not achieve making history for our country by only focusing on winning that medal.
00:27:46.806 --> 00:27:52.406
We said, in order to win that medal, what do we have to do today and the next
00:27:52.406 --> 00:27:56.566
day and the next day and the next day and broke it down into such small, actionable items.
00:27:56.726 --> 00:28:00.906
And a lot of it came down to the culture, right? How are we going to show up
00:28:00.906 --> 00:28:01.906
for each other every day?
00:28:02.046 --> 00:28:06.546
How are we going to approach our training every day? What does this look like in action?
00:28:06.786 --> 00:28:10.546
And we very seldom talked about that gold medal.
00:28:10.666 --> 00:28:13.766
It was there. Our team's mission was the gold medal mission.
00:28:13.866 --> 00:28:18.786
We knew that was there. But the conversations we had were around those more
00:28:18.786 --> 00:28:21.466
impactful everyday behaviors.
00:28:21.646 --> 00:28:26.686
So I think once people start to grasp that and understand how impactful today
00:28:26.686 --> 00:28:33.386
is to working toward that big goal that we have set, the buy-in comes quite quickly. I love that.
00:28:33.426 --> 00:28:37.546
I do think that, you know, working in organization, it can be,
00:28:37.586 --> 00:28:41.806
you know, you get together and maybe you have a goal setting committee or you
00:28:41.806 --> 00:28:45.826
have a strategic planning committee and, you know, people write a mission statement
00:28:45.826 --> 00:28:47.146
and they set those goals.
00:28:47.146 --> 00:28:50.846
But then trying to translate that into the daily practices,
00:28:50.966 --> 00:28:55.146
like how does that impact our routines and rhythms and the way that we talk
00:28:55.146 --> 00:29:02.346
with each other and really get infused into the nitty gritty of how we're living
00:29:02.346 --> 00:29:06.186
with each other is sometimes I think a big gap for people.
00:29:06.186 --> 00:29:14.906
And so I love that you have found a way to translate the big goal into the daily
00:29:14.906 --> 00:29:17.486
practices of making that goal happen.
00:29:17.786 --> 00:29:22.586
You know, if you were if you were to give my my listeners one piece of advice
00:29:22.586 --> 00:29:25.866
on goal setting or planning, like what would that be?
00:29:26.006 --> 00:29:29.306
I would say don't sell yourself short. number one absolutely
00:29:29.306 --> 00:29:32.006
freaking go for it like the number of people in my
00:29:32.006 --> 00:29:35.026
life who said wait you you're five foot three
00:29:35.026 --> 00:29:37.826
as a grown human and you still have a dream of being an
00:29:37.826 --> 00:29:42.226
olympian if if i had allowed those people to dictate the kind of goal that i
00:29:42.226 --> 00:29:46.746
set for myself who knows where i would be right now i think dream the big dream
00:29:46.746 --> 00:29:51.526
set that goal even if you don't reach that exact goal just like we didn't get
00:29:51.526 --> 00:29:53.366
the gold medal but we got the bronze
00:29:53.366 --> 00:29:56.846
and it was still pretty freaking cool and And at the end of the day,
00:29:56.886 --> 00:30:00.786
the journey is the destination. That's such a cliche saying.
00:30:00.966 --> 00:30:05.566
After being on that journey for so many years and getting the medal,
00:30:05.706 --> 00:30:09.266
standing on the podium, what made it special was the journey.
00:30:09.386 --> 00:30:11.606
It actually wasn't the destination.
00:30:11.846 --> 00:30:16.686
And it's just a different way to look at those big goals we set for ourselves.
00:30:17.046 --> 00:30:20.406
Do I want this? Do I really want this? What am I willing to do for it?
00:30:20.531 --> 00:30:24.091
For it? And am I motivated to do something about it today?
00:30:24.351 --> 00:30:27.811
And when that motivation isn't there, because it often isn't,
00:30:27.811 --> 00:30:29.351
right? Motivation comes and goes.
00:30:29.491 --> 00:30:34.351
Do I have the discipline to do just one thing today that is going to get me
00:30:34.351 --> 00:30:36.111
one step closer to that goal?
00:30:36.331 --> 00:30:41.591
Yes. Thank you so much. I think that I'm so passionate about helping women understand
00:30:41.591 --> 00:30:47.631
that we are capable so much more than than we expect of ourselves.
00:30:47.811 --> 00:30:52.631
So we expect extraordinary things from the people around us. And we believe in them.
00:30:52.811 --> 00:30:57.951
Like you said earlier with self-talk, we'll pump them up. We'll be amazing encouragers for them.
00:30:58.211 --> 00:31:03.151
But, you know, there's all sorts of research that talks about ways in which women,
00:31:03.291 --> 00:31:08.871
you know, don't have those expectations for themselves or are risk adverse or,
00:31:08.951 --> 00:31:12.871
you know, struggle with the confidence and, you know, the journey,
00:31:13.031 --> 00:31:14.771
just commit to the journey and,
00:31:14.951 --> 00:31:18.131
you know, show up and try to be 1% better.
00:31:18.271 --> 00:31:22.451
And I think it's amazing where that can take you. So if my listeners wanted
00:31:22.451 --> 00:31:25.171
to connect with you, if they were interested in working with you,
00:31:25.191 --> 00:31:26.051
how could they do that, Joey?
00:31:26.191 --> 00:31:29.531
My website is probably the easiest way to do that. joey.com.
00:31:29.791 --> 00:31:33.931
So that's J-O-E-Y-L-Y-E.com.
00:31:34.211 --> 00:31:37.651
Lots of information and ways to contact me there. Awesome. I'll make sure that
00:31:37.651 --> 00:31:38.731
I put that in the show notes.
00:31:38.751 --> 00:31:42.491
And I just want to say, it has been such a joy to get to know you.
00:31:42.491 --> 00:31:44.311
We got connected by my friend Evan.
00:31:44.471 --> 00:31:49.651
So shout out to Evan. And I'm so glad that he thought that we would connect because we have.
00:31:49.831 --> 00:31:52.211
Yes, this was awesome. Thank you so much for having me.
00:31:53.231 --> 00:31:57.251
If this podcast has inspired you, guided you, or just made you laugh,
00:31:57.411 --> 00:32:00.631
the number one way that you can thank me is by leaving a written review for
00:32:00.631 --> 00:32:02.071
the show over on Apple Podcast.
00:32:02.851 --> 00:32:06.771
I'm seriously tickled every time that I hear from you all. So pop onto Instagram
00:32:06.771 --> 00:32:09.991
and follow Plangle Plan and digital message me.
00:32:10.291 --> 00:32:14.611
I want to say hello. I want to geek out about all things planning and goal-setting.
00:32:14.951 --> 00:32:17.291
Keep sensing the possibilities y'all.