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Welcome to Mindset Mastery Moments, the best growth mindset podcast, recognized by Million Podcasts, and ranked as a top mindset podcast by Feed Spot.
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We're proud to be in the top 1% on listen notes.
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Join Dr.
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Alyssa White as we explore powerful insights and strategies to elevate your mindset.
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Let's dive in the things.
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I call myself a professional pivoter because I've pivoted so many times and started over so many times.
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I dare not count.
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But I'm sure we'll get into it.
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So let's talk about it.
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Let's let's talk about why I'm here and how we can help the people in their journey.
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I went in at the age of 25 and I already had three young children.
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And the reason I did that is because I was running from an abusive marriage.
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And so my first pivot or major pivot was one that was one that was sacrificial.
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Um, and it was one that was another love for my babies.
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It was not something that I did because, you know, I wanted to serve my country and I am patriotic.
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Okay, I love America, but mine was all geared towards uh getting out of a bad situation.
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And it was major, but staying in an abusive marriage and possibly dying or going to prison versus going to serve the country and going to military.
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And so when you think of it, you're like, wow, right.
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Yes, but it allowed me to build up self-trust.
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And needless to say, every pivot after that, because I've had quite a few, um, it they were easier because they were not life or death situations.
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It was, okay, we made it in this situation.
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Nothing could be as bad as that, and I'm gonna trust myself going into this next one.
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And so I did about 10 years in the military, had an amazing career, met some amazing people.
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I love the journey.
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And it was time for me to deploy.
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And I decided I'm gonna get out and be more present with my children.
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And so I got out and went to corporate.
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And so pivoting from the military to corporate, it was like, okay, this isn't, you know, this is nothing compared to the military.
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I'm not leaving my family, I don't have to make that sacrifice, I'm not up at four in the morning, right?
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And so it's like uh it gave me um more bandwidth, more capacity.
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It gave me more freedom, but I already had the structure and the discipline.
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And so I also thrived in corporate.
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And so yeah.
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Um, and so it's it's been um, it's been good.
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I look, um, I had a birthday two months ago, and um, I just kind of sat back and reflected and on the years, right?
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And and podcasting, because you tell your story so much, it allows you to kind of come off of the shelf.
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I'll say I compartmentalize sometimes, and so because I've had all these major changes, there's pieces of me that are no longer visible because they're on the shelf because I'm out of that season, right?
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And so when we talk about third quarter women and the seasons that they're in, it's really easy to identify through podcasting all of the changes through the seasons over the time.
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And when I'm talking to someone, I can pull something out and say, you know, this is what I did back in this time, and I can see where you're at, and this is how I got through it.
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And I think this can help you on your journey.
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And so not only does it support them, but it lets them know they're not alone.
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So now they feel seen, they feel supported, it holds them accountable because, well, if she did it, like you said, I can do it too.
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Um, and I live by that too, even at this big age.
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I'm like, if somebody else did it, I could do it.
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You don't know, I don't know.
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And so my origin was that it was one of survival, one of um sacrificial love, um, one of necessity, right?
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Um, and no regrets.
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It's it's been good.
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Um, quite a few lessons, honestly.
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Um, each lesson and each version and each pivot um helped me build up a level of self-trust.
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One, and so there was confidence that was built, self-trust that was built.
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Um, telling myself, um, again, like I just said, that that was a hard pivot, but the next one is not so hard because things are not so bad.
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And if you made it through that, then you can make it through this, right?
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Um understanding that um, like, give yourself permission to do the hard thing.
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It's only hard in the moment.
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When you look back on it, it's never as hard as you thought it would be, right?
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So it's taking that step to move forward.
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I really believe that um the mindset of permission, we get so stuck on things um and situations that if we just gave ourselves permission to make the first step, the next step will be easier.
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And so give yourself permission to step outside of the box, give yourself permission to even explore it with your mind because that's where it happens first, right?
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Um, I think if you can see it here, then you can have it here.
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And so giving yourself permission to dream, giving yourself permission to map it out, to draw it out, and giving yourself permission to take the first step towards it.
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Right.
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And so, and that's my process across everything in my entire life, my whole life.
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I journal, I write, I have planners, um, I'm really big on a schedule because I believe that it's necessary.
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And so those are the things when I say I coach my clients, yes, I'm there for strategy to help them with those operational pieces and make sure sure that their business is sustainable and successful.
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But I'm very much there for those coaching moments to root them on and hold them accountable and to speak life into them, right?
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And to plant seeds so that they know they can do it, to take something they're not sure about and to pull it out of them.
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You know?
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Um, but I think that was, yeah, through every pivot it happens every single time.
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It was like going into the military.
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How did you go into the military?
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How'd you do that?
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You had a six-month-old baby.
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And it was like, well, the hard thing was staying in the abuse of marriage.
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Like I was at the point where I thought he was gonna kill me, I was gonna kill him, he was gonna go to prison, I was gonna go to prison.
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What would happen to the kids?
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And so I made the hard decision because I want it better for my children, not better for myself, but in the moment it was better for them.
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And so when I came out of corporate, it was like, okay, I mean, came out of the military.
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It was like, I need to be more present with my children.
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You know, we're doing good in the military, but I feel like they need me physically.
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And so it was like, okay, how do you leave the safety net of the military?
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Because I was striving.
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I wasn't, I was, you know, performing good evows, I'm passing my PRTs, which is a physical readiness test, right?
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I was promoting.
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So it was okay, you leave in the safety net of a guaranteed paycheck, benefits, like all of the things that come with the military.
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And now you're gonna step out into something unknown and it's not guaranteed.
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And so it's like, well, I'm gonna trust myself, I'm gonna give myself permission, we're gonna do this because I feel like it's what's best for us.
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And that's what I did, you know?
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And so in the next pivot was the same way.
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Um, the next pivot was very unfortunate.
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I um I left corporate to go to the well, it's the fourth pivot.
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I left corporate to go to government.
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I'm about back my military time, and from government, I went back to contracting corporate, and I was doing it for myself, and I lost my brother to gun violence.
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And um that pivot was hard because we lost him at he was only 27, and it made me look at myself.
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And I said, I don't like who you are.
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And I said, Well, what are we gonna do about it?
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And so I started doing the self-help and I started a nonprofit to heal, to serve the people, but in healing and serving the people, that's when I realized, like, I like teaching people, I like pouring into people.
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And I was like, I had to figure out what that looks like.
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And so I gave myself permission to leave that because people say, Why would you leave government contracting?
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You're making good money.
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I've helped people make millions of dollars.
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Like, why would you leave that?
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You know, because that's some people's dream.
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But it was no longer my dream, it was no longer my passion.
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And so I gave myself permission to say, what does that look like?
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Right.
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So when you say, what does it look like?
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You're seeing it here every time.
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I'm gonna say, what does that look like?
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And then I'm gonna start writing it down.
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I'm gonna start getting very particular in the deeds, very specific, like in the weeds of what I what it is I want and and exploring it, right?
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A creative nature of a child.
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We we lose that in adulthood, right?
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Mm-hmm.
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Mm-hmm.
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Um, definitely a mixture.
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So initially, from the military to corporate, I would still say that was survival, but I felt like I am really big on um loyalty, commitment, obligation, integrity, those things.
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And I believe children don't ask to be here.
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Like point blank, period.
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They didn't ask to be here in my craziness and whatever I got going on.
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And so I owe it to them, right, to take care of them to the best of my ability and to provide what they need um based on my level of understanding and capacity.
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And I didn't have enough capacity in the military to be what I felt like they needed, right?
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And so I said, okay, we're gonna have to step away from that because they need more of my presence.
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Um, and so it was definitely a decision based on need in that moment.
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Um, I do believe that nothing happens by chance.
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And so a lot of times we feel like we've like I went to school, like I disagree, and I went to this job, and I did I made all these investments right into this particular area.
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And how dare I walk away from that?
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Well, because it's time and it's not for you know, for no reason that sounds horrible, but you can do it for nothing.
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It's gonna serve you in your next season.
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There's lessons that you're gonna take with you, good or bad, that's gonna serve you, and you just have to be open to not only understanding it, but and to exploring like how do I apply this new information, this old information to my new season.
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Um, so definitely a mix of the two over the journey, it just becomes extremely um a lot easier over time to make that change, right?
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Because yeah, it builds up like a muscle, like anything else, right?
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It definitely builds up over time.
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And the other thing is I think the older we get, because we lose that curiosity, right?
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We lose um, it's like when you're 17, you think you're invisible.
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Nothing is gonna happen to me.
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I'm like my 21-year-old, one of the disagreements we have often is like, I'm like, you're you're not even 100 pounds.
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Please be safe.
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And she's like, Mom, I'm fine, you're overthinking it.
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I'm like, girl, no, you're you're less than 100 pounds.
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Somebody will grab you up and throw you in the car.
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It's like, stop it, you know.
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But I think with older women, because we've endured so much and we wear so many nets and we pour out so much, we often lose a sense of ourselves and a sense of self-worth, not self-worth in a sense like low self-esteem, but self-worth in that when we just put everyone.
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Yeah, we put everybody else first.
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And so we forget to put ourselves first, and I think that's a muscle also.
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And I think over time it's important for you um not just to honor yourself, but also to honor your thoughts, honor your feelings, honor, which comes in the permission part, right?
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Like seriously.
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Um, and so I I think it's it's key.
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It's definitely key.
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It's like so many different components.
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I'm just like putting together one of those big puzzles with all the million pieces, like 500 pieces, and you're looking at a person on their journey, and it's like, well, I have this piece over here, but I'm missing that piece over there.
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And it's like, but it all fits, it all is required in order to have a whole person.
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But we're dealing with um people who become broken over time but don't necessarily know they're broken.
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And so they don't understand, I want to do this great thing, but I don't have capacity to do this great thing.
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I need to look at all of my pieces so I know my non-negotiables so that I know the thing that I'm doing, not only is it possible, but within this construct, maybe they're using the wrong business model, maybe it doesn't fit their lifestyle, right?
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Like all the all the things, but it also goes to mindset.
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Yeah, yeah.
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That is perfect for us.
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So when you think about when you think about life as a game, right?
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Third, first, second, third, and fourth quarter, right?
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You're thinking first quarter is your young, your young days, second quarter is that has some bustle of, you know, you're building your life.
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And then third quarter, it's like I've built a life, I've been the spouse, I've raised the kids, I got the degrees, I've given out all of these things.
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Now what about me?
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What's next for me?
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You're still so young to where you still have life to live, because you're not in the fourth quarter, but just old enough to where you've done a lot.
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And either you're looking for the next thing, or you're trying to figure out like, I'm not necessarily I've like, I've I've reached the mountaintop.
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Now what?
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Now what?
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Right.
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And so it's like, okay, for us, and I say us because I'm in the third quarter too.
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I have the aging parents, I have the adult kids, I have the green kids, I've got the degrees, I did the travel, I bought the houses, the cars, like everything that I could have checked the block for, I did it.
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So now what?
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And so how do we approach life from that place?
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Yeah.
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Most of them are feeling overwhelmed, burnt out, disregarded, um, unappreciated, um, overwhelmed because they have so many competing priorities and they don't have enough time.
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Um, disregarded because they've been the spouse, they raised the kids, the kids are going off to live their own life, um, you know, and not necessarily disregarded by their spouse, but a lot of them feel like they're not supported by their spouse or their mates or significant others.
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Um, and it's like, oh, she's, you know, I'm just doing this little thing I want to do.
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And it's like, well, no, what do you mean this little thing?
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Let's talk about it.
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What is it exactly?
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Tell me about it.
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And a lot of times they just need someone to listen to what it is that they're feeling and what it is that they desire and to have realistic conversations about it.
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Um, as far as all of the competing priorities, there are some handful that still have younger children or high school children, but they also have aging parents and they also have a spouse and they also have work, but they still have this desire in them to create something.
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And it's like, well, how do I do that?
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Because I got to make sure that mom gets to the doctor and dad gets this medicine.
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And I got to make sure that I have dinner on the table and the kids got activities and but I really want to do this thing, right?
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And I don't, I'm not really happy at work anymore.
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It's like, well, how do I fit this into all of that?
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And it's like, okay, well, let's look at your life.
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Let's talk about a life audit, let's do a time audit and a calendar audit, and let's see exactly what it is you want to do and what kind of um is it in a box where we can't make any adjustments as far as how it's gonna operate in the business model, or can we look at automation delegation, right?
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Can we actually um make it sustainable for your lifestyle?
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Do you have any time in your schedule that you can get to this to grow it?
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Right?
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Like what exactly are we talking about?
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And of course, it's different.
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For everyone.
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So the answers would determine like exactly how you move forward.
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But it's giving us a place, a safe place to say you're not alone.
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You're not the only one.
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It's possible.
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How do I know it's possible?
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Because I do it.
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I am all over the place.
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All over the place, meaning I travel a lot.
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My business is location independent.
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Um, and yes, and I love being a CEO.
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Why?
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Because when I'm gonna take a few weeks and spend time with the grandkids on summer break, then that's what I do.
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Um my oldest granddaughter is about to be 11.
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No, we went to the beach yesterday.
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I felt it.
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No, my grandson, my youngest grandson is two and a half, and he um runs to the water, and so I have to run after him, and then he runs into the waves, but they're too big for him.
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So I have to lift him up at 30 pounds so the water doesn't take him under.
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So every few seconds I'm lifting him up to catch the wave.
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Oh my god.
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We did two hours, it was a workout.
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Oh yeah, no, no, no.
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I am blessed.
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Do it again.
00:28:09.890 --> 00:28:28.370
I think a lot of times we um we just kind of brush off and blow off our experience as um, I'm just a housewife, I'm just a mom, I'm just and it's like, well, no, let's look at what it requires for you to operate daily and to run a household successfully.
00:28:28.610 --> 00:28:38.610
And like if you're going to work every day and you got the kids and they got activities and you still keep the house clean and get the dinner cooked and get the groceries done and you're doing the budget and all those things.
00:28:38.769 --> 00:28:40.690
I mean, that's project management 101.
00:28:40.930 --> 00:28:47.490
And so I tell them like everything counts, and you can always help someone who's coming behind you.
00:28:47.650 --> 00:28:49.650
One, it lets them know they're not alone, right?
00:28:49.730 --> 00:29:10.850
And so we leave breadcrumbs that show you the way to have the success that we have, um, not just through a relationship and accountability and support, because even though um your clients, like everyone may not be able to afford to work with you directly, but you have this platform that can come and learn from you here and it costs them nothing.
00:29:11.090 --> 00:29:14.130
And so I tell everyone, like one, you're not behind.
00:29:14.450 --> 00:29:19.490
Two, it's okay to try something, give yourself permission to try it if you don't like it, pivot.
00:29:19.730 --> 00:29:22.290
Um, there's a saying that says fail and fail fast.
00:29:22.769 --> 00:29:23.250
Why?
00:29:23.490 --> 00:29:30.290
Because you know, Action creates data and data gives you metrics and it tells you whether something is doable or it's not.
00:29:30.450 --> 00:29:33.570
Um, and that's what you're gonna use as your guide, as your leading principle.
00:29:33.730 --> 00:29:37.650
It's there's a sailing um word called tacking, right?
00:29:37.810 --> 00:29:48.370
Because you get on the sailboat, you can go in the wrong direction or to where you want to land, but with making small changes, small um redirections, you would end up exactly where you want to land.
00:29:48.529 --> 00:29:50.290
And so it's just like that in life.
00:29:50.690 --> 00:30:01.170
Give yourself permission to try the thing, and you're not married to the success or the failure, you're just gonna keep going in the direction that you feel like you need to go.
00:30:01.330 --> 00:30:09.970
And over time, what you'll find that as you make these tweaks and changes, if you do not give up, if you keep going, you're gonna have success.
00:30:10.130 --> 00:30:11.330
It's inevitable.
00:30:11.570 --> 00:30:15.170
So the the race isn't given to the Swift, it's those that endure to the end.
00:30:15.250 --> 00:30:21.410
You gotta keep going, just keep trying it, keep putting your foot forward, and you're gonna have some success.
00:30:21.570 --> 00:30:27.570
And don't forget to have fun along the way, don't forget to laugh, don't forget to celebrate every win.
00:30:27.730 --> 00:30:31.090
The fact that you wake up and get one thing done a day is a win.
00:30:31.170 --> 00:30:36.210
I just tell my friend day, you set three goals a day, but if you get the one then, one is the win.
00:30:36.450 --> 00:30:37.490
We're gonna take that.
00:30:37.730 --> 00:30:38.930
One is the win.
00:30:39.090 --> 00:30:39.730
Mm-hmm.
00:30:44.610 --> 00:30:45.009
All right.
00:30:46.690 --> 00:30:47.650
Exactly.
00:30:54.290 --> 00:30:54.930
Yes.
00:32:16.930 --> 00:32:19.490
It's not a me problem because I am great, okay?
00:32:19.810 --> 00:32:30.450
Um, and so um it's really you uh I always go back to giving yourself permission, but how do you see yourself?
00:32:30.610 --> 00:32:36.850
And so when I came out the military, I was enlisted, I was an aviation storekeeper, which is logistics, okay.
00:32:37.090 --> 00:32:40.370
And I worked with leadership in in meetings.
00:32:40.450 --> 00:32:44.610
But listen, everyone told me I was crazy about the military, I wasn't gonna be able to get a good job.
00:32:44.690 --> 00:32:49.330
I was not like they told me all this stuff, and I said, No, no, no, you're wrong, and I'm getting out.
00:32:49.490 --> 00:32:51.810
And when I got out, I got exactly what I said I was gonna get.
00:32:51.890 --> 00:32:53.170
I got a job making six figures.
00:32:53.250 --> 00:32:56.290
They were like, Are you gonna end up working at Lowe's homes depot or why am I?
00:32:56.529 --> 00:33:00.050
I was like, No, I'm not, because God knows I got these babies and I gotta take care of them.
00:33:00.290 --> 00:33:07.730
I got a job, listen, I got a job working at Deloitte Consulting, which is one of the top consulting firms, right?
00:33:08.130 --> 00:33:14.130
Yes, six figures, and it was because one, it was about how I articulated my experience.
00:33:14.290 --> 00:33:36.210
So if you don't know and understand how to basically say um you have experience in managing a budget and managing schedules and getting deadlines and things like that, then get with someone, don't be afraid to get with someone in order to leverage their experience to help convey the information so that the language translates.
00:33:36.370 --> 00:33:40.450
And so the difference between two people getting hired is what's on that resume.
00:33:43.090 --> 00:33:44.050
Exactly.
00:33:46.450 --> 00:33:47.410
Exactly.
00:38:14.129 --> 00:38:15.889
No, no, no, you're fine.
00:38:22.129 --> 00:38:23.170
No, no, no, no.
00:38:23.569 --> 00:38:32.609
Um, for my new folks, women a lot of times we if for those that do write, they will have a notebook full of ideas and they're like, I want to do all these things.
00:38:32.690 --> 00:38:35.329
And I'm like, well, let's look at low-hanging fruit.
00:38:35.409 --> 00:38:37.649
And I'll say this for you as a strategist, right?
00:38:37.809 --> 00:38:40.049
And I give you permission to borrow this.
00:38:41.170 --> 00:38:46.690
For your folks that come to you and they clearly are like, Oh, what do you want to be when I grow up, but what do you want your next season to look like?
00:38:46.849 --> 00:38:50.289
Right, and I simply ask them five questions, right?
00:38:50.849 --> 00:38:56.929
Um write down all of the things you want to do, and we're gonna grade them by five things, right?
00:38:57.170 --> 00:38:58.609
Are you good at it?
00:38:59.009 --> 00:39:00.849
Will people pay for it?
00:39:01.889 --> 00:39:02.449
Right?
00:39:02.769 --> 00:39:04.210
Is there a market for it?
00:39:05.969 --> 00:39:11.969
Okay, um, do you have a um capacity for it?
00:39:13.649 --> 00:39:16.289
Right, because you want to make sure it fits your season.
00:39:16.609 --> 00:39:28.369
Um and so when you and that's actually four, but when you start talking to your folks and you um they ask they integrate it basically one to five.
00:39:28.449 --> 00:39:32.049
That's what a one if it's not really good and five is if it's perfect.
00:39:32.210 --> 00:39:36.849
And so we normally get down to one or two things, and I say, okay, I need you to pick, and that's the one I'm gonna go with.
00:39:37.009 --> 00:39:43.969
Um, and so we talk to them about those things, why it can be a good idea, but if you're not passionate about it, you're not gonna stick with it.
00:39:44.129 --> 00:39:46.449
It has to be something that moves you past motivation.
00:39:46.609 --> 00:39:52.210
Um, you want to be clear in your why why you're doing it, not just because it'll make money for you, but because it pulls your heart strings.
00:39:52.449 --> 00:39:54.849
So when you don't feel like doing it, you'll do it anyway.
00:39:55.089 --> 00:39:56.690
Um, can you market it?
00:39:56.769 --> 00:39:57.730
Is there a market for it?
00:39:57.809 --> 00:40:03.489
There's ways to find out if there's a market for something you're doing in different apps and stuff.
00:40:03.809 --> 00:40:08.929
But the gist of it is if there's already a market for it, you don't want to be the first one to do anything.
00:40:09.089 --> 00:40:15.250
You want to find something that's already done that you can look at and you can make it your own and create a system around it.
00:40:16.929 --> 00:40:17.569
Exactly.
00:40:17.730 --> 00:40:23.569
If it's a problem that's being solved, that means people will pay for it because you're removing a problem that they have, you're removing pain.
00:40:23.730 --> 00:40:25.730
And then does it fit the season of your life?
00:40:25.969 --> 00:40:28.369
Because it can be the best idea ever.
00:40:28.609 --> 00:40:34.369
But if you don't have capacity for it, it's you're gonna get burnt out, you're gonna be overwhelmed, and you're not gonna want to do it.
00:40:34.529 --> 00:40:34.769
Why?
00:40:34.929 --> 00:40:44.369
Because it's pulling from your non-negotiables, and so you want to look at your work-life balance, work if it's you have capacity outside of work, family.
00:40:44.529 --> 00:40:52.049
If you have a family, if you have capacity outside of your family, how much time can you donate to this thing to make sure that you can grow it?
00:40:52.210 --> 00:40:58.129
Because otherwise you're gonna be frustrated because you're not really gonna make progress because you're not giving it the time that it needs.
00:40:58.369 --> 00:40:58.690
Okay.
00:40:59.250 --> 00:41:09.649
And so if it fits those parameters, let's go for it and let's talk about your business model and what that looks like and how to get you actually building out this business that you have.
00:41:09.809 --> 00:41:15.649
Um, scaling is very similar the way you want to handle it, because you don't scale this way the same way you scale this way.
00:41:15.809 --> 00:41:26.529
And so you want to be really clear on if you're looking to scale quickly over a course of five to ten years, or you're looking to scale something within one to like six months to 18 months, right?
00:41:26.690 --> 00:41:38.049
Um, and then how much you're trying to scale if you're taking a business in a different direction, or if you're just building out a current um, I'll say division or department within something, a service you're already doing.
00:41:38.289 --> 00:41:45.329
Um, and so that this time is a lot based on if you'll market to the same client base or if you're gonna be branching off into a new direction.
00:41:45.489 --> 00:41:55.649
You want to make sure your current base already has feet and it can walk on its own because you don't want to have a walking, uh not walking baby and one that you're trying to grow at the same time.
00:41:55.730 --> 00:41:57.329
It's gonna be too much.
00:41:57.649 --> 00:42:06.289
Um now, um, I will say for what you're trying to accomplish and trying to make sure that you're giving your client what they need.
00:42:06.449 --> 00:42:07.969
I am really big on surveys.
00:42:08.129 --> 00:42:14.849
The best thing you can always do with your clients is ask every one of my clients when they come into my ecosphere, they get a survey.
00:42:15.089 --> 00:42:15.569
Why?
00:42:15.809 --> 00:42:26.690
Because it's gonna tell me exactly if they're serious about their business, where they are in their business, and how clear they are, not just within themselves, but also in how business operates and in their business.
00:42:26.929 --> 00:42:44.849
And then we're gonna talk about it because I want to make sure I'm understanding what the information that you provided for me so that when I work with you, you're getting direct, good information and feedback that appeals to you because you know, as coaches and strategists, we have to give quick wins because it motivates them to keep going.
00:42:45.170 --> 00:42:59.329
And so it really is a um almost like an ebb and flow of touch and feel of understanding tools and operations, but also making sure that you're um providing what the client needs.
00:42:59.489 --> 00:43:11.649
Um, if you're already in business and you're providing information to clients or to a public structure and you're not really sure on what it is that they need, always ask whether you're doing something quick on a survey.
00:43:11.809 --> 00:43:31.250
Um, I know some podcasters they'll do a survey right in the middle of this for people to respond to, or they'll do stuff on social media, or if you have a webinar asking the questions during there, and then tweaking your information immediately to answer those questions, which, if you're in this capacity, should be a subject matter expert in order to do that.
00:43:31.969 --> 00:43:36.690
So this is not for beginners or those who are not familiar with their craft.
00:43:36.849 --> 00:43:39.730
Um, if you're gonna do that particular approach.
00:43:39.969 --> 00:43:46.690
But um, yeah, I I think if you're not sure, I think you need to be clear on definitely your why.
00:43:46.849 --> 00:43:48.289
I think that's the starting place.
00:43:48.449 --> 00:43:51.569
Um, if you have one idea, it's like why don't I want to do this?
00:43:52.529 --> 00:44:04.769
You know, so they are write it down, yes.
00:47:03.889 --> 00:47:04.690
Absolutely.
00:47:04.849 --> 00:47:05.809
It all counts.
00:47:06.049 --> 00:47:06.929
It does.
00:47:07.170 --> 00:47:09.649
Yeah, I thought we put it in our toolbox, right?
00:47:09.730 --> 00:47:13.170
And you don't know when you're gonna need it, but it'll be there to pull out when you need it.
00:47:13.489 --> 00:47:14.129
Yeah.
00:47:29.089 --> 00:47:36.210
Um, project management, if we had to talk about that, um, I think it is strategy, it is understanding the discipline.
00:47:36.449 --> 00:47:43.889
I think if um you are managing your budget, your schedule, and the quality and understand the scope of what it is you want to accomplish.
00:47:43.969 --> 00:47:48.210
And so that's the quality piece, it's the um I'm triangle as it's called.
00:47:48.369 --> 00:47:53.730
But I think if you are managing those pieces pieces and you're clear on those pieces, then you will have success.
00:47:53.969 --> 00:47:58.690
And so I use project management in my personal life, a plan of action and milestones.
00:47:58.769 --> 00:48:01.649
All of my clients get one, but I use them personally.
00:48:01.809 --> 00:48:02.210
Why?
00:48:02.529 --> 00:48:04.929
Because it helps remove the noise.
00:48:05.250 --> 00:48:09.730
When you find um an entrepreneur who says, Um, I want to make a million dollars.
00:48:09.809 --> 00:48:11.889
And it's like, okay, but what are you gonna do to make a million dollars?
00:48:11.969 --> 00:48:13.329
And I was like, Well, I'm gonna sell this thing.
00:48:13.409 --> 00:48:15.329
I'm like, okay, well, how many of those things do you need to sell?
00:48:15.409 --> 00:48:17.649
And then when you plan to sell them, and do you have a client base?
00:48:17.889 --> 00:48:21.409
And so immediately they are overwhelmed, like, oh my god, wait a minute.
00:48:21.489 --> 00:48:22.769
I just thought I wanted to sell this thing.
00:48:22.849 --> 00:48:25.009
And it's like, well, no, it takes work to sell that thing.
00:48:25.089 --> 00:48:28.529
And if you're gonna sell it within this timeline, then you need to work out all those pieces.
00:48:28.609 --> 00:48:35.329
So we need to look at the risk of various constraints, we need to look at the estimated start and completion dates, we need to look at the dependencies, right?
00:48:35.569 --> 00:48:45.170
Um, can we do these things, you know, consistently in in line, or are there um are there um, you know, can we go in parallel?
00:48:45.409 --> 00:48:52.609
Um, I'm thinking of a work, a critical path item, meaning something that has to be done in order to have success, or is it a negotiable, right?
00:48:52.769 --> 00:48:55.489
And if so, will we accept the rest and mitigate it?
00:48:55.569 --> 00:48:57.649
And they're like, I don't know about all that.
00:48:57.809 --> 00:49:08.769
And so I help to bring those terms and that understanding into their little world and their business to make sure that, okay, well, now you have all these things and now you see all the work that's required.
00:49:08.849 --> 00:49:12.129
Oh, are we really going to make a million dollars in a year doing this thing?
00:49:12.289 --> 00:49:18.449
And they're like, well, maybe I was a little too aggressive, or maybe I don't know if I want to do that, or is this a negotiable?
00:49:18.529 --> 00:49:19.649
No, that's not a negotiable.
00:49:19.730 --> 00:49:21.489
Well, I don't know if I have the capacity to do that.
00:49:21.569 --> 00:49:23.170
Well, that's why we need to talk about it.
00:49:23.409 --> 00:49:29.089
So I think project management makes all things um doable, but is very strategic.
00:49:29.329 --> 00:49:38.609
Now, when we talk about humans, because especially as women, we're very emotional, very driven by our emotions.
00:49:38.769 --> 00:49:42.129
Um, that's when the motivation piece comes in.
00:49:42.210 --> 00:49:51.329
Because once they see all the work that's required on a project management standpoint, which is your strategy piece, then they're like, um, a lot of them when I say, Well, how are you gonna market this?
00:49:51.569 --> 00:49:55.329
And they say, Well, I think I'm just gonna, you know, talk to a few friends.
00:49:55.409 --> 00:49:58.849
And I'm like, Well, I don't think you're gonna have success if you only talk to a few friends.
00:49:59.009 --> 00:50:01.250
We need to go broader and wider than that.
00:50:01.329 --> 00:50:02.849
And are you comfortable with this?
00:50:03.009 --> 00:50:04.929
And then also, well, I don't know if I'm comfortable.
00:50:05.009 --> 00:50:05.969
Or do I have to?
00:50:06.369 --> 00:50:10.449
And it's like, gotta talk about why you don't feel like you're comfortable.
00:50:10.690 --> 00:50:18.289
Now, at our age, a lot of us are not comfortable with social media, and so I tell them, I say, I need you to change your thoughts around social media.
00:50:18.369 --> 00:50:23.889
It is not you showing up, it is you showing up so that your tribe can find you.
00:50:23.969 --> 00:50:27.569
So the people who are called to you can find you, no other reason.
00:50:27.649 --> 00:50:33.889
And so don't look at it as I need to go and do the latest TikTok dance so that you know I can be relevant.
00:50:34.049 --> 00:50:39.889
It's like, no, you need to go up there and show up as authentic, authentic self.
00:50:40.289 --> 00:50:51.170
And the people that are called to you, you're it's gonna be like a light shining on a hill, and they're gonna be drawn to you and say, I like what she's saying, I like her vibe, I like her energy, I like you know what she stands for.
00:50:51.409 --> 00:50:57.489
I'm gonna follow her, I'm gonna stay connected to her, I'm gonna be a part of what she's doing, and that's when people are gonna find you.
00:50:57.730 --> 00:50:59.250
So change your mindset.
00:50:59.409 --> 00:51:01.730
You're people are not gonna knock on your door if they don't know who you are.
00:51:01.809 --> 00:51:03.409
It's no good to be the best seat.
00:51:05.969 --> 00:51:06.609
Yeah.
00:51:24.849 --> 00:51:25.969
Okay, let's go.
00:51:26.210 --> 00:51:27.409
Quick answer.
00:51:36.049 --> 00:51:38.129
Success is no regrets at the end of the day.
00:51:38.210 --> 00:51:41.649
When I get 80, I don't want to have any regrets, and that'll be my success.
00:51:41.809 --> 00:51:47.250
That I lived fully, I poured out everything and did everything that I desire to do.
00:51:47.649 --> 00:51:48.609
For sure.
00:51:51.089 --> 00:51:52.849
Not to take anything personal.
00:51:53.089 --> 00:51:58.369
Um, yeah, because failure is a part of the journey, and there is no success without failure.
00:52:03.409 --> 00:52:04.369
That they're alone.
00:52:04.529 --> 00:52:06.289
You don't have to do it alone, and you're not alone.
00:52:06.449 --> 00:52:08.690
And so find you a tribe, get into support.
00:52:08.769 --> 00:52:14.210
And if you don't have um access to financial communities, get on Facebook.
00:52:14.369 --> 00:52:16.690
There's all types of groups on Facebook.
00:52:16.769 --> 00:52:18.210
You don't have to be alone in your journey.
00:52:27.730 --> 00:52:29.009
Self-care days.
00:52:29.089 --> 00:52:33.409
Um, if you have not taken, if you can't afford a day, do a self-care hour.
00:52:33.569 --> 00:52:37.730
And it could be something simple that you enjoy that pours into you.
00:52:37.889 --> 00:52:40.129
Um, start small if you don't know how to do it.
00:52:40.210 --> 00:52:47.649
It could just be breathing, it'd just be taking a quiet moment, going for a 10-minute walk and build up from there because you are worth it.
00:52:47.730 --> 00:52:52.129
And if there's no you, there's no whatever your dream is, it goes away with you.
00:52:52.449 --> 00:52:53.089
Yeah.
00:52:57.649 --> 00:52:58.609
Oh my God.
00:52:58.690 --> 00:53:02.369
Um, best investment I ever made probably is a plane ticket.
00:53:02.449 --> 00:53:07.889
I stay on a plane traveling to foreign lands, um, seeing new things and having new experiences.
00:53:07.969 --> 00:53:10.929
I think that's the best investment is experiences.
00:53:15.009 --> 00:53:18.049
Um, I'm an introvert, so downtime with family.
00:53:19.569 --> 00:53:20.210
Yeah.
00:53:22.769 --> 00:53:23.730
Coffee.
00:53:28.369 --> 00:53:29.649
Tomorrow's not promise.
00:53:29.809 --> 00:53:30.849
Do it today.
00:53:42.210 --> 00:53:43.969
The younger self would say wow.
00:53:44.210 --> 00:53:49.089
The older self would say, um, keep going, it gets easier, it gets better.
00:53:51.969 --> 00:53:57.089
Um the change, the evolution, for sure.
00:54:47.009 --> 00:54:59.649
Is to know that no matter what is in your heart, a dream, a desire, um, whether it's to lose weight or to start that business or to do something amazing for someone you love, know that it is all possible.
00:54:59.889 --> 00:55:03.329
Please give yourself permission because not only you're worth it, you deserve it.
00:55:03.489 --> 00:55:14.369
Um, and I would say to speak life over yourself, speak life over everything that it pertains to you because your words are seeds that you plant and they grow and they create the world that you see around you.
00:55:14.529 --> 00:55:17.250
And so um, that would be what I leave you with.
00:55:17.489 --> 00:55:21.089
And it was great being here and pouring into you guys.
00:55:21.170 --> 00:55:23.569
And I look forward to connecting.
00:55:23.649 --> 00:55:27.170
If you want to connect, I am Shondako on all social medias.
00:55:27.329 --> 00:55:28.769
Um, and that's it.
00:55:28.929 --> 00:55:30.049
Thank you guys.
00:55:47.250 --> 00:55:48.529
Um, sure.
00:55:48.769 --> 00:55:54.369
Um, the book is basically for people who need to break through barriers in order to achieve success.
00:55:54.529 --> 00:55:59.569
And so if that is you and you need some help and some tools, please grab it.
00:56:00.129 --> 00:56:02.049
Um, yes.
00:56:02.449 --> 00:56:05.009
Um, I'm gonna do that.
00:56:05.329 --> 00:56:09.329
But that will be a great tool for you to have in your repertoire.
00:56:09.489 --> 00:56:11.649
Um, definitely take a look at it.
00:00:59.600 --> 00:01:11.280
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00:01:15.920 --> 00:01:21.840
Alyssa White as we explore powerful insights and strategies to elevate your mindset.
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Let's dive in the things.
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I call myself a professional pivoter because I've pivoted so many times and started over so many times.
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I dare not count.
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But I'm sure we'll get into it.
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So let's talk about it.
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Let's let's talk about why I'm here and how we can help the people in their journey.
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I went in at the age of 25 and I already had three young children.
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And the reason I did that is because I was running from an abusive marriage.
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And so my first pivot or major pivot was one that was one that was sacrificial.
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Um, and it was one that was another love for my babies.
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It was not something that I did because, you know, I wanted to serve my country and I am patriotic.
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Okay, I love America, but mine was all geared towards uh getting out of a bad situation.
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And it was major, but staying in an abusive marriage and possibly dying or going to prison versus going to serve the country and going to military.
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And so when you think of it, you're like, wow, right.
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Yes, but it allowed me to build up self-trust.
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And needless to say, every pivot after that, because I've had quite a few, um, it they were easier because they were not life or death situations.
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It was, okay, we made it in this situation.
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Nothing could be as bad as that, and I'm gonna trust myself going into this next one.
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And so I did about 10 years in the military, had an amazing career, met some amazing people.
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I love the journey.
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And it was time for me to deploy.
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And I decided I'm gonna get out and be more present with my children.
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And so I got out and went to corporate.
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And so pivoting from the military to corporate, it was like, okay, this isn't, you know, this is nothing compared to the military.
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I'm not leaving my family, I don't have to make that sacrifice, I'm not up at four in the morning, right?
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And so it's like uh it gave me um more bandwidth, more capacity.
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It gave me more freedom, but I already had the structure and the discipline.
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And so I also thrived in corporate.
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And so yeah.
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Um, and so it's it's been um, it's been good.
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I look, um, I had a birthday two months ago, and um, I just kind of sat back and reflected and on the years, right?
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And and podcasting, because you tell your story so much, it allows you to kind of come off of the shelf.
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I'll say I compartmentalize sometimes, and so because I've had all these major changes, there's pieces of me that are no longer visible because they're on the shelf because I'm out of that season, right?
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And so when we talk about third quarter women and the seasons that they're in, it's really easy to identify through podcasting all of the changes through the seasons over the time.
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And when I'm talking to someone, I can pull something out and say, you know, this is what I did back in this time, and I can see where you're at, and this is how I got through it.
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And I think this can help you on your journey.
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And so not only does it support them, but it lets them know they're not alone.
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So now they feel seen, they feel supported, it holds them accountable because, well, if she did it, like you said, I can do it too.
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Um, and I live by that too, even at this big age.
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I'm like, if somebody else did it, I could do it.
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You don't know, I don't know.
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And so my origin was that it was one of survival, one of um sacrificial love, um, one of necessity, right?
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Um, and no regrets.
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It's it's been good.
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Um, quite a few lessons, honestly.
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Um, each lesson and each version and each pivot um helped me build up a level of self-trust.
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One, and so there was confidence that was built, self-trust that was built.
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Um, telling myself, um, again, like I just said, that that was a hard pivot, but the next one is not so hard because things are not so bad.
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And if you made it through that, then you can make it through this, right?
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Um understanding that um, like, give yourself permission to do the hard thing.
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It's only hard in the moment.
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When you look back on it, it's never as hard as you thought it would be, right?
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So it's taking that step to move forward.
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I really believe that um the mindset of permission, we get so stuck on things um and situations that if we just gave ourselves permission to make the first step, the next step will be easier.
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And so give yourself permission to step outside of the box, give yourself permission to even explore it with your mind because that's where it happens first, right?
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Um, I think if you can see it here, then you can have it here.
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And so giving yourself permission to dream, giving yourself permission to map it out, to draw it out, and giving yourself permission to take the first step towards it.
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Right.
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And so, and that's my process across everything in my entire life, my whole life.
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I journal, I write, I have planners, um, I'm really big on a schedule because I believe that it's necessary.
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And so those are the things when I say I coach my clients, yes, I'm there for strategy to help them with those operational pieces and make sure sure that their business is sustainable and successful.
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But I'm very much there for those coaching moments to root them on and hold them accountable and to speak life into them, right?
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And to plant seeds so that they know they can do it, to take something they're not sure about and to pull it out of them.
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You know?
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Um, but I think that was, yeah, through every pivot it happens every single time.
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It was like going into the military.
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How did you go into the military?
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How'd you do that?
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You had a six-month-old baby.
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And it was like, well, the hard thing was staying in the abuse of marriage.
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Like I was at the point where I thought he was gonna kill me, I was gonna kill him, he was gonna go to prison, I was gonna go to prison.
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What would happen to the kids?
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And so I made the hard decision because I want it better for my children, not better for myself, but in the moment it was better for them.
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And so when I came out of corporate, it was like, okay, I mean, came out of the military.
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It was like, I need to be more present with my children.
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You know, we're doing good in the military, but I feel like they need me physically.
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And so it was like, okay, how do you leave the safety net of the military?
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Because I was striving.
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I wasn't, I was, you know, performing good evows, I'm passing my PRTs, which is a physical readiness test, right?
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I was promoting.
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So it was okay, you leave in the safety net of a guaranteed paycheck, benefits, like all of the things that come with the military.
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And now you're gonna step out into something unknown and it's not guaranteed.
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And so it's like, well, I'm gonna trust myself, I'm gonna give myself permission, we're gonna do this because I feel like it's what's best for us.
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And that's what I did, you know?
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And so in the next pivot was the same way.
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Um, the next pivot was very unfortunate.
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I um I left corporate to go to the well, it's the fourth pivot.
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I left corporate to go to government.
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I'm about back my military time, and from government, I went back to contracting corporate, and I was doing it for myself, and I lost my brother to gun violence.
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And um that pivot was hard because we lost him at he was only 27, and it made me look at myself.
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And I said, I don't like who you are.
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And I said, Well, what are we gonna do about it?
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And so I started doing the self-help and I started a nonprofit to heal, to serve the people, but in healing and serving the people, that's when I realized, like, I like teaching people, I like pouring into people.
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And I was like, I had to figure out what that looks like.
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And so I gave myself permission to leave that because people say, Why would you leave government contracting?
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You're making good money.
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I've helped people make millions of dollars.
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Like, why would you leave that?
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You know, because that's some people's dream.
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But it was no longer my dream, it was no longer my passion.
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And so I gave myself permission to say, what does that look like?
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Right.
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So when you say, what does it look like?
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You're seeing it here every time.
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I'm gonna say, what does that look like?
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And then I'm gonna start writing it down.
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I'm gonna start getting very particular in the deeds, very specific, like in the weeds of what I what it is I want and and exploring it, right?
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A creative nature of a child.
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We we lose that in adulthood, right?
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Mm-hmm.
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Mm-hmm.
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Um, definitely a mixture.
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So initially, from the military to corporate, I would still say that was survival, but I felt like I am really big on um loyalty, commitment, obligation, integrity, those things.
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And I believe children don't ask to be here.
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Like point blank, period.
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They didn't ask to be here in my craziness and whatever I got going on.
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And so I owe it to them, right, to take care of them to the best of my ability and to provide what they need um based on my level of understanding and capacity.
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And I didn't have enough capacity in the military to be what I felt like they needed, right?
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And so I said, okay, we're gonna have to step away from that because they need more of my presence.
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Um, and so it was definitely a decision based on need in that moment.
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Um, I do believe that nothing happens by chance.
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And so a lot of times we feel like we've like I went to school, like I disagree, and I went to this job, and I did I made all these investments right into this particular area.
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And how dare I walk away from that?
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Well, because it's time and it's not for you know, for no reason that sounds horrible, but you can do it for nothing.
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It's gonna serve you in your next season.
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There's lessons that you're gonna take with you, good or bad, that's gonna serve you, and you just have to be open to not only understanding it, but and to exploring like how do I apply this new information, this old information to my new season.
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Um, so definitely a mix of the two over the journey, it just becomes extremely um a lot easier over time to make that change, right?
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Because yeah, it builds up like a muscle, like anything else, right?
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It definitely builds up over time.
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And the other thing is I think the older we get, because we lose that curiosity, right?
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We lose um, it's like when you're 17, you think you're invisible.
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Nothing is gonna happen to me.
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I'm like my 21-year-old, one of the disagreements we have often is like, I'm like, you're you're not even 100 pounds.
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Please be safe.
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And she's like, Mom, I'm fine, you're overthinking it.
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I'm like, girl, no, you're you're less than 100 pounds.
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Somebody will grab you up and throw you in the car.
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It's like, stop it, you know.
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But I think with older women, because we've endured so much and we wear so many nets and we pour out so much, we often lose a sense of ourselves and a sense of self-worth, not self-worth in a sense like low self-esteem, but self-worth in that when we just put everyone.
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Yeah, we put everybody else first.
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And so we forget to put ourselves first, and I think that's a muscle also.
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And I think over time it's important for you um not just to honor yourself, but also to honor your thoughts, honor your feelings, honor, which comes in the permission part, right?
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Like seriously.
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Um, and so I I think it's it's key.
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It's definitely key.
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It's like so many different components.
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I'm just like putting together one of those big puzzles with all the million pieces, like 500 pieces, and you're looking at a person on their journey, and it's like, well, I have this piece over here, but I'm missing that piece over there.
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And it's like, but it all fits, it all is required in order to have a whole person.
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But we're dealing with um people who become broken over time but don't necessarily know they're broken.
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And so they don't understand, I want to do this great thing, but I don't have capacity to do this great thing.
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I need to look at all of my pieces so I know my non-negotiables so that I know the thing that I'm doing, not only is it possible, but within this construct, maybe they're using the wrong business model, maybe it doesn't fit their lifestyle, right?
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Like all the all the things, but it also goes to mindset.
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Yeah, yeah.
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That is perfect for us.
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So when you think about when you think about life as a game, right?
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Third, first, second, third, and fourth quarter, right?
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You're thinking first quarter is your young, your young days, second quarter is that has some bustle of, you know, you're building your life.
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And then third quarter, it's like I've built a life, I've been the spouse, I've raised the kids, I got the degrees, I've given out all of these things.
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Now what about me?
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What's next for me?
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You're still so young to where you still have life to live, because you're not in the fourth quarter, but just old enough to where you've done a lot.
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And either you're looking for the next thing, or you're trying to figure out like, I'm not necessarily I've like, I've I've reached the mountaintop.
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Now what?
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Now what?
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Right.
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And so it's like, okay, for us, and I say us because I'm in the third quarter too.
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I have the aging parents, I have the adult kids, I have the green kids, I've got the degrees, I did the travel, I bought the houses, the cars, like everything that I could have checked the block for, I did it.
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So now what?
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And so how do we approach life from that place?
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Yeah.
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Most of them are feeling overwhelmed, burnt out, disregarded, um, unappreciated, um, overwhelmed because they have so many competing priorities and they don't have enough time.
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Um, disregarded because they've been the spouse, they raised the kids, the kids are going off to live their own life, um, you know, and not necessarily disregarded by their spouse, but a lot of them feel like they're not supported by their spouse or their mates or significant others.
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Um, and it's like, oh, she's, you know, I'm just doing this little thing I want to do.
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And it's like, well, no, what do you mean this little thing?
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Let's talk about it.
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What is it exactly?
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Tell me about it.
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And a lot of times they just need someone to listen to what it is that they're feeling and what it is that they desire and to have realistic conversations about it.
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Um, as far as all of the competing priorities, there are some handful that still have younger children or high school children, but they also have aging parents and they also have a spouse and they also have work, but they still have this desire in them to create something.
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And it's like, well, how do I do that?
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Because I got to make sure that mom gets to the doctor and dad gets this medicine.
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And I got to make sure that I have dinner on the table and the kids got activities and but I really want to do this thing, right?
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And I don't, I'm not really happy at work anymore.
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It's like, well, how do I fit this into all of that?
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And it's like, okay, well, let's look at your life.
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Let's talk about a life audit, let's do a time audit and a calendar audit, and let's see exactly what it is you want to do and what kind of um is it in a box where we can't make any adjustments as far as how it's gonna operate in the business model, or can we look at automation delegation, right?
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Can we actually um make it sustainable for your lifestyle?
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Do you have any time in your schedule that you can get to this to grow it?
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Right?
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Like what exactly are we talking about?
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And of course, it's different.
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For everyone.
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So the answers would determine like exactly how you move forward.
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But it's giving us a place, a safe place to say you're not alone.
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You're not the only one.
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It's possible.
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How do I know it's possible?
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Because I do it.
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I am all over the place.
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All over the place, meaning I travel a lot.
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My business is location independent.
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Um, and yes, and I love being a CEO.
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Why?
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Because when I'm gonna take a few weeks and spend time with the grandkids on summer break, then that's what I do.
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Um my oldest granddaughter is about to be 11.
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No, we went to the beach yesterday.
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I felt it.
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No, my grandson, my youngest grandson is two and a half, and he um runs to the water, and so I have to run after him, and then he runs into the waves, but they're too big for him.
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So I have to lift him up at 30 pounds so the water doesn't take him under.
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So every few seconds I'm lifting him up to catch the wave.
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Oh my god.
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We did two hours, it was a workout.
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Oh yeah, no, no, no.
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I am blessed.
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Do it again.
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I think a lot of times we um we just kind of brush off and blow off our experience as um, I'm just a housewife, I'm just a mom, I'm just and it's like, well, no, let's look at what it requires for you to operate daily and to run a household successfully.
00:28:28.610 --> 00:28:38.610
And like if you're going to work every day and you got the kids and they got activities and you still keep the house clean and get the dinner cooked and get the groceries done and you're doing the budget and all those things.
00:28:38.769 --> 00:28:40.690
I mean, that's project management 101.
00:28:40.930 --> 00:28:47.490
And so I tell them like everything counts, and you can always help someone who's coming behind you.
00:28:47.650 --> 00:28:49.650
One, it lets them know they're not alone, right?
00:28:49.730 --> 00:29:10.850
And so we leave breadcrumbs that show you the way to have the success that we have, um, not just through a relationship and accountability and support, because even though um your clients, like everyone may not be able to afford to work with you directly, but you have this platform that can come and learn from you here and it costs them nothing.
00:29:11.090 --> 00:29:14.130
And so I tell everyone, like one, you're not behind.
00:29:14.450 --> 00:29:19.490
Two, it's okay to try something, give yourself permission to try it if you don't like it, pivot.
00:29:19.730 --> 00:29:22.290
Um, there's a saying that says fail and fail fast.
00:29:22.769 --> 00:29:23.250
Why?
00:29:23.490 --> 00:29:30.290
Because you know, Action creates data and data gives you metrics and it tells you whether something is doable or it's not.
00:29:30.450 --> 00:29:33.570
Um, and that's what you're gonna use as your guide, as your leading principle.
00:29:33.730 --> 00:29:37.650
It's there's a sailing um word called tacking, right?
00:29:37.810 --> 00:29:48.370
Because you get on the sailboat, you can go in the wrong direction or to where you want to land, but with making small changes, small um redirections, you would end up exactly where you want to land.
00:29:48.529 --> 00:29:50.290
And so it's just like that in life.
00:29:50.690 --> 00:30:01.170
Give yourself permission to try the thing, and you're not married to the success or the failure, you're just gonna keep going in the direction that you feel like you need to go.
00:30:01.330 --> 00:30:09.970
And over time, what you'll find that as you make these tweaks and changes, if you do not give up, if you keep going, you're gonna have success.
00:30:10.130 --> 00:30:11.330
It's inevitable.
00:30:11.570 --> 00:30:15.170
So the the race isn't given to the Swift, it's those that endure to the end.
00:30:15.250 --> 00:30:21.410
You gotta keep going, just keep trying it, keep putting your foot forward, and you're gonna have some success.
00:30:21.570 --> 00:30:27.570
And don't forget to have fun along the way, don't forget to laugh, don't forget to celebrate every win.
00:30:27.730 --> 00:30:31.090
The fact that you wake up and get one thing done a day is a win.
00:30:31.170 --> 00:30:36.210
I just tell my friend day, you set three goals a day, but if you get the one then, one is the win.
00:30:36.450 --> 00:30:37.490
We're gonna take that.
00:30:37.730 --> 00:30:38.930
One is the win.
00:30:39.090 --> 00:30:39.730
Mm-hmm.
00:30:44.610 --> 00:30:45.009
All right.
00:30:46.690 --> 00:30:47.650
Exactly.
00:30:54.290 --> 00:30:54.930
Yes.
00:32:16.930 --> 00:32:19.490
It's not a me problem because I am great, okay?
00:32:19.810 --> 00:32:30.450
Um, and so um it's really you uh I always go back to giving yourself permission, but how do you see yourself?
00:32:30.610 --> 00:32:36.850
And so when I came out the military, I was enlisted, I was an aviation storekeeper, which is logistics, okay.
00:32:37.090 --> 00:32:40.370
And I worked with leadership in in meetings.
00:32:40.450 --> 00:32:44.610
But listen, everyone told me I was crazy about the military, I wasn't gonna be able to get a good job.
00:32:44.690 --> 00:32:49.330
I was not like they told me all this stuff, and I said, No, no, no, you're wrong, and I'm getting out.
00:32:49.490 --> 00:32:51.810
And when I got out, I got exactly what I said I was gonna get.
00:32:51.890 --> 00:32:53.170
I got a job making six figures.
00:32:53.250 --> 00:32:56.290
They were like, Are you gonna end up working at Lowe's homes depot or why am I?
00:32:56.529 --> 00:33:00.050
I was like, No, I'm not, because God knows I got these babies and I gotta take care of them.
00:33:00.290 --> 00:33:07.730
I got a job, listen, I got a job working at Deloitte Consulting, which is one of the top consulting firms, right?
00:33:08.130 --> 00:33:14.130
Yes, six figures, and it was because one, it was about how I articulated my experience.
00:33:14.290 --> 00:33:36.210
So if you don't know and understand how to basically say um you have experience in managing a budget and managing schedules and getting deadlines and things like that, then get with someone, don't be afraid to get with someone in order to leverage their experience to help convey the information so that the language translates.
00:33:36.370 --> 00:33:40.450
And so the difference between two people getting hired is what's on that resume.
00:33:43.090 --> 00:33:44.050
Exactly.
00:33:46.450 --> 00:33:47.410
Exactly.
00:38:14.129 --> 00:38:15.889
No, no, no, you're fine.
00:38:22.129 --> 00:38:23.170
No, no, no, no.
00:38:23.569 --> 00:38:32.609
Um, for my new folks, women a lot of times we if for those that do write, they will have a notebook full of ideas and they're like, I want to do all these things.
00:38:32.690 --> 00:38:35.329
And I'm like, well, let's look at low-hanging fruit.
00:38:35.409 --> 00:38:37.649
And I'll say this for you as a strategist, right?
00:38:37.809 --> 00:38:40.049
And I give you permission to borrow this.
00:38:41.170 --> 00:38:46.690
For your folks that come to you and they clearly are like, Oh, what do you want to be when I grow up, but what do you want your next season to look like?
00:38:46.849 --> 00:38:50.289
Right, and I simply ask them five questions, right?
00:38:50.849 --> 00:38:56.929
Um write down all of the things you want to do, and we're gonna grade them by five things, right?
00:38:57.170 --> 00:38:58.609
Are you good at it?
00:38:59.009 --> 00:39:00.849
Will people pay for it?
00:39:01.889 --> 00:39:02.449
Right?
00:39:02.769 --> 00:39:04.210
Is there a market for it?
00:39:05.969 --> 00:39:11.969
Okay, um, do you have a um capacity for it?
00:39:13.649 --> 00:39:16.289
Right, because you want to make sure it fits your season.
00:39:16.609 --> 00:39:28.369
Um and so when you and that's actually four, but when you start talking to your folks and you um they ask they integrate it basically one to five.
00:39:28.449 --> 00:39:32.049
That's what a one if it's not really good and five is if it's perfect.
00:39:32.210 --> 00:39:36.849
And so we normally get down to one or two things, and I say, okay, I need you to pick, and that's the one I'm gonna go with.
00:39:37.009 --> 00:39:43.969
Um, and so we talk to them about those things, why it can be a good idea, but if you're not passionate about it, you're not gonna stick with it.
00:39:44.129 --> 00:39:46.449
It has to be something that moves you past motivation.
00:39:46.609 --> 00:39:52.210
Um, you want to be clear in your why why you're doing it, not just because it'll make money for you, but because it pulls your heart strings.
00:39:52.449 --> 00:39:54.849
So when you don't feel like doing it, you'll do it anyway.
00:39:55.089 --> 00:39:56.690
Um, can you market it?
00:39:56.769 --> 00:39:57.730
Is there a market for it?
00:39:57.809 --> 00:40:03.489
There's ways to find out if there's a market for something you're doing in different apps and stuff.
00:40:03.809 --> 00:40:08.929
But the gist of it is if there's already a market for it, you don't want to be the first one to do anything.
00:40:09.089 --> 00:40:15.250
You want to find something that's already done that you can look at and you can make it your own and create a system around it.
00:40:16.929 --> 00:40:17.569
Exactly.
00:40:17.730 --> 00:40:23.569
If it's a problem that's being solved, that means people will pay for it because you're removing a problem that they have, you're removing pain.
00:40:23.730 --> 00:40:25.730
And then does it fit the season of your life?
00:40:25.969 --> 00:40:28.369
Because it can be the best idea ever.
00:40:28.609 --> 00:40:34.369
But if you don't have capacity for it, it's you're gonna get burnt out, you're gonna be overwhelmed, and you're not gonna want to do it.
00:40:34.529 --> 00:40:34.769
Why?
00:40:34.929 --> 00:40:44.369
Because it's pulling from your non-negotiables, and so you want to look at your work-life balance, work if it's you have capacity outside of work, family.
00:40:44.529 --> 00:40:52.049
If you have a family, if you have capacity outside of your family, how much time can you donate to this thing to make sure that you can grow it?
00:40:52.210 --> 00:40:58.129
Because otherwise you're gonna be frustrated because you're not really gonna make progress because you're not giving it the time that it needs.
00:40:58.369 --> 00:40:58.690
Okay.
00:40:59.250 --> 00:41:09.649
And so if it fits those parameters, let's go for it and let's talk about your business model and what that looks like and how to get you actually building out this business that you have.
00:41:09.809 --> 00:41:15.649
Um, scaling is very similar the way you want to handle it, because you don't scale this way the same way you scale this way.
00:41:15.809 --> 00:41:26.529
And so you want to be really clear on if you're looking to scale quickly over a course of five to ten years, or you're looking to scale something within one to like six months to 18 months, right?
00:41:26.690 --> 00:41:38.049
Um, and then how much you're trying to scale if you're taking a business in a different direction, or if you're just building out a current um, I'll say division or department within something, a service you're already doing.
00:41:38.289 --> 00:41:45.329
Um, and so that this time is a lot based on if you'll market to the same client base or if you're gonna be branching off into a new direction.
00:41:45.489 --> 00:41:55.649
You want to make sure your current base already has feet and it can walk on its own because you don't want to have a walking, uh not walking baby and one that you're trying to grow at the same time.
00:41:55.730 --> 00:41:57.329
It's gonna be too much.
00:41:57.649 --> 00:42:06.289
Um now, um, I will say for what you're trying to accomplish and trying to make sure that you're giving your client what they need.
00:42:06.449 --> 00:42:07.969
I am really big on surveys.
00:42:08.129 --> 00:42:14.849
The best thing you can always do with your clients is ask every one of my clients when they come into my ecosphere, they get a survey.
00:42:15.089 --> 00:42:15.569
Why?
00:42:15.809 --> 00:42:26.690
Because it's gonna tell me exactly if they're serious about their business, where they are in their business, and how clear they are, not just within themselves, but also in how business operates and in their business.
00:42:26.929 --> 00:42:44.849
And then we're gonna talk about it because I want to make sure I'm understanding what the information that you provided for me so that when I work with you, you're getting direct, good information and feedback that appeals to you because you know, as coaches and strategists, we have to give quick wins because it motivates them to keep going.
00:42:45.170 --> 00:42:59.329
And so it really is a um almost like an ebb and flow of touch and feel of understanding tools and operations, but also making sure that you're um providing what the client needs.
00:42:59.489 --> 00:43:11.649
Um, if you're already in business and you're providing information to clients or to a public structure and you're not really sure on what it is that they need, always ask whether you're doing something quick on a survey.
00:43:11.809 --> 00:43:31.250
Um, I know some podcasters they'll do a survey right in the middle of this for people to respond to, or they'll do stuff on social media, or if you have a webinar asking the questions during there, and then tweaking your information immediately to answer those questions, which, if you're in this capacity, should be a subject matter expert in order to do that.
00:43:31.969 --> 00:43:36.690
So this is not for beginners or those who are not familiar with their craft.
00:43:36.849 --> 00:43:39.730
Um, if you're gonna do that particular approach.
00:43:39.969 --> 00:43:46.690
But um, yeah, I I think if you're not sure, I think you need to be clear on definitely your why.
00:43:46.849 --> 00:43:48.289
I think that's the starting place.
00:43:48.449 --> 00:43:51.569
Um, if you have one idea, it's like why don't I want to do this?
00:43:52.529 --> 00:44:04.769
You know, so they are write it down, yes.
00:47:03.889 --> 00:47:04.690
Absolutely.
00:47:04.849 --> 00:47:05.809
It all counts.
00:47:06.049 --> 00:47:06.929
It does.
00:47:07.170 --> 00:47:09.649
Yeah, I thought we put it in our toolbox, right?
00:47:09.730 --> 00:47:13.170
And you don't know when you're gonna need it, but it'll be there to pull out when you need it.
00:47:13.489 --> 00:47:14.129
Yeah.
00:47:29.089 --> 00:47:36.210
Um, project management, if we had to talk about that, um, I think it is strategy, it is understanding the discipline.
00:47:36.449 --> 00:47:43.889
I think if um you are managing your budget, your schedule, and the quality and understand the scope of what it is you want to accomplish.
00:47:43.969 --> 00:47:48.210
And so that's the quality piece, it's the um I'm triangle as it's called.
00:47:48.369 --> 00:47:53.730
But I think if you are managing those pieces pieces and you're clear on those pieces, then you will have success.
00:47:53.969 --> 00:47:58.690
And so I use project management in my personal life, a plan of action and milestones.
00:47:58.769 --> 00:48:01.649
All of my clients get one, but I use them personally.
00:48:01.809 --> 00:48:02.210
Why?
00:48:02.529 --> 00:48:04.929
Because it helps remove the noise.
00:48:05.250 --> 00:48:09.730
When you find um an entrepreneur who says, Um, I want to make a million dollars.
00:48:09.809 --> 00:48:11.889
And it's like, okay, but what are you gonna do to make a million dollars?
00:48:11.969 --> 00:48:13.329
And I was like, Well, I'm gonna sell this thing.
00:48:13.409 --> 00:48:15.329
I'm like, okay, well, how many of those things do you need to sell?
00:48:15.409 --> 00:48:17.649
And then when you plan to sell them, and do you have a client base?
00:48:17.889 --> 00:48:21.409
And so immediately they are overwhelmed, like, oh my god, wait a minute.
00:48:21.489 --> 00:48:22.769
I just thought I wanted to sell this thing.
00:48:22.849 --> 00:48:25.009
And it's like, well, no, it takes work to sell that thing.
00:48:25.089 --> 00:48:28.529
And if you're gonna sell it within this timeline, then you need to work out all those pieces.
00:48:28.609 --> 00:48:35.329
So we need to look at the risk of various constraints, we need to look at the estimated start and completion dates, we need to look at the dependencies, right?
00:48:35.569 --> 00:48:45.170
Um, can we do these things, you know, consistently in in line, or are there um are there um, you know, can we go in parallel?
00:48:45.409 --> 00:48:52.609
Um, I'm thinking of a work, a critical path item, meaning something that has to be done in order to have success, or is it a negotiable, right?
00:48:52.769 --> 00:48:55.489
And if so, will we accept the rest and mitigate it?
00:48:55.569 --> 00:48:57.649
And they're like, I don't know about all that.
00:48:57.809 --> 00:49:08.769
And so I help to bring those terms and that understanding into their little world and their business to make sure that, okay, well, now you have all these things and now you see all the work that's required.
00:49:08.849 --> 00:49:12.129
Oh, are we really going to make a million dollars in a year doing this thing?
00:49:12.289 --> 00:49:18.449
And they're like, well, maybe I was a little too aggressive, or maybe I don't know if I want to do that, or is this a negotiable?
00:49:18.529 --> 00:49:19.649
No, that's not a negotiable.
00:49:19.730 --> 00:49:21.489
Well, I don't know if I have the capacity to do that.
00:49:21.569 --> 00:49:23.170
Well, that's why we need to talk about it.
00:49:23.409 --> 00:49:29.089
So I think project management makes all things um doable, but is very strategic.
00:49:29.329 --> 00:49:38.609
Now, when we talk about humans, because especially as women, we're very emotional, very driven by our emotions.
00:49:38.769 --> 00:49:42.129
Um, that's when the motivation piece comes in.
00:49:42.210 --> 00:49:51.329
Because once they see all the work that's required on a project management standpoint, which is your strategy piece, then they're like, um, a lot of them when I say, Well, how are you gonna market this?
00:49:51.569 --> 00:49:55.329
And they say, Well, I think I'm just gonna, you know, talk to a few friends.
00:49:55.409 --> 00:49:58.849
And I'm like, Well, I don't think you're gonna have success if you only talk to a few friends.
00:49:59.009 --> 00:50:01.250
We need to go broader and wider than that.
00:50:01.329 --> 00:50:02.849
And are you comfortable with this?
00:50:03.009 --> 00:50:04.929
And then also, well, I don't know if I'm comfortable.
00:50:05.009 --> 00:50:05.969
Or do I have to?
00:50:06.369 --> 00:50:10.449
And it's like, gotta talk about why you don't feel like you're comfortable.
00:50:10.690 --> 00:50:18.289
Now, at our age, a lot of us are not comfortable with social media, and so I tell them, I say, I need you to change your thoughts around social media.
00:50:18.369 --> 00:50:23.889
It is not you showing up, it is you showing up so that your tribe can find you.
00:50:23.969 --> 00:50:27.569
So the people who are called to you can find you, no other reason.
00:50:27.649 --> 00:50:33.889
And so don't look at it as I need to go and do the latest TikTok dance so that you know I can be relevant.
00:50:34.049 --> 00:50:39.889
It's like, no, you need to go up there and show up as authentic, authentic self.
00:50:40.289 --> 00:50:51.170
And the people that are called to you, you're it's gonna be like a light shining on a hill, and they're gonna be drawn to you and say, I like what she's saying, I like her vibe, I like her energy, I like you know what she stands for.
00:50:51.409 --> 00:50:57.489
I'm gonna follow her, I'm gonna stay connected to her, I'm gonna be a part of what she's doing, and that's when people are gonna find you.
00:50:57.730 --> 00:50:59.250
So change your mindset.
00:50:59.409 --> 00:51:01.730
You're people are not gonna knock on your door if they don't know who you are.
00:51:01.809 --> 00:51:03.409
It's no good to be the best seat.
00:51:05.969 --> 00:51:06.609
Yeah.
00:51:24.849 --> 00:51:25.969
Okay, let's go.
00:51:26.210 --> 00:51:27.409
Quick answer.
00:51:36.049 --> 00:51:38.129
Success is no regrets at the end of the day.
00:51:38.210 --> 00:51:41.649
When I get 80, I don't want to have any regrets, and that'll be my success.
00:51:41.809 --> 00:51:47.250
That I lived fully, I poured out everything and did everything that I desire to do.
00:51:47.649 --> 00:51:48.609
For sure.
00:51:51.089 --> 00:51:52.849
Not to take anything personal.
00:51:53.089 --> 00:51:58.369
Um, yeah, because failure is a part of the journey, and there is no success without failure.
00:52:03.409 --> 00:52:04.369
That they're alone.
00:52:04.529 --> 00:52:06.289
You don't have to do it alone, and you're not alone.
00:52:06.449 --> 00:52:08.690
And so find you a tribe, get into support.
00:52:08.769 --> 00:52:14.210
And if you don't have um access to financial communities, get on Facebook.
00:52:14.369 --> 00:52:16.690
There's all types of groups on Facebook.
00:52:16.769 --> 00:52:18.210
You don't have to be alone in your journey.
00:52:27.730 --> 00:52:29.009
Self-care days.
00:52:29.089 --> 00:52:33.409
Um, if you have not taken, if you can't afford a day, do a self-care hour.
00:52:33.569 --> 00:52:37.730
And it could be something simple that you enjoy that pours into you.
00:52:37.889 --> 00:52:40.129
Um, start small if you don't know how to do it.
00:52:40.210 --> 00:52:47.649
It could just be breathing, it'd just be taking a quiet moment, going for a 10-minute walk and build up from there because you are worth it.
00:52:47.730 --> 00:52:52.129
And if there's no you, there's no whatever your dream is, it goes away with you.
00:52:52.449 --> 00:52:53.089
Yeah.
00:52:57.649 --> 00:52:58.609
Oh my God.
00:52:58.690 --> 00:53:02.369
Um, best investment I ever made probably is a plane ticket.
00:53:02.449 --> 00:53:07.889
I stay on a plane traveling to foreign lands, um, seeing new things and having new experiences.
00:53:07.969 --> 00:53:10.929
I think that's the best investment is experiences.
00:53:15.009 --> 00:53:18.049
Um, I'm an introvert, so downtime with family.
00:53:19.569 --> 00:53:20.210
Yeah.
00:53:22.769 --> 00:53:23.730
Coffee.
00:53:28.369 --> 00:53:29.649
Tomorrow's not promise.
00:53:29.809 --> 00:53:30.849
Do it today.
00:53:42.210 --> 00:53:43.969
The younger self would say wow.
00:53:44.210 --> 00:53:49.089
The older self would say, um, keep going, it gets easier, it gets better.
00:53:51.969 --> 00:53:57.089
Um the change, the evolution, for sure.
00:54:47.009 --> 00:54:59.649
Is to know that no matter what is in your heart, a dream, a desire, um, whether it's to lose weight or to start that business or to do something amazing for someone you love, know that it is all possible.
00:54:59.889 --> 00:55:03.329
Please give yourself permission because not only you're worth it, you deserve it.
00:55:03.489 --> 00:55:14.369
Um, and I would say to speak life over yourself, speak life over everything that it pertains to you because your words are seeds that you plant and they grow and they create the world that you see around you.
00:55:14.529 --> 00:55:17.250
And so um, that would be what I leave you with.
00:55:17.489 --> 00:55:21.089
And it was great being here and pouring into you guys.
00:55:21.170 --> 00:55:23.569
And I look forward to connecting.
00:55:23.649 --> 00:55:27.170
If you want to connect, I am Shondako on all social medias.
00:55:27.329 --> 00:55:28.769
Um, and that's it.
00:55:28.929 --> 00:55:30.049
Thank you guys.
00:55:47.250 --> 00:55:48.529
Um, sure.
00:55:48.769 --> 00:55:54.369
Um, the book is basically for people who need to break through barriers in order to achieve success.
00:55:54.529 --> 00:55:59.569
And so if that is you and you need some help and some tools, please grab it.
00:56:00.129 --> 00:56:02.049
Um, yes.
00:56:02.449 --> 00:56:05.009
Um, I'm gonna do that.
00:56:05.329 --> 00:56:09.329
But that will be a great tool for you to have in your repertoire.
00:56:09.489 --> 00:56:11.649
Um, definitely take a look at it.
