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Kelsey Blahnik has spent her career as a social worker sitting across from people who don't see eye to eye—politically, personally, every which way—and she's found that peace was never about avoiding the hard conversation. It's about learning how to have it.
In this episode, Kelsey and Wilk dig into her book, The And Way: Assertive Peacemaking in a Divided World, and the real difference between being assertive and being aggressive. Kelsey uses an Instant Pot analogy that sticks: if you never let the steam out, you're eventually going to explode. Her work is about finding a better way to vent.
They also get into what Kelsey calls competing impulses—the idea that you're not just "a people pleaser" or "the difficult one," you're a whole human being capable of both, depending on the moment. That shift in self-perception, she says, is what makes it possible to extend the same grace to people you disagree with.
If you've ever avoided a conversation because you weren't sure how to have it without it blowing up, this one's for you.
Learn more about and connect with Kelsey Blahnik in the full show notes for this episode at www.DerateTheHate.com.
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The world is a better place if we are better people. Be grateful for all you’ve got. Make every day the day that you want it to be!
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