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Most of us think of grief as something that happens after a death. But grief shows up in many forms throughout our lives: during caregiving, health challenges, major transitions, changing identities, estranged relationships, unrealized dreams, and even positive life changes.
In this episode of Surfing the Quicksand, Kathy talks with Dr. Larey Swanson, an integrative health and wellness coach, physician, and grief circle facilitator, about the many ways loss and grief shape our lives. Drawing from both professional expertise and deeply personal experiences, including the loss of both parents, caregiving, and supporting a child through a life-altering illness, Larey offers a compassionate and expansive view of grief.
Together, they explore anticipatory grief, ambiguous loss, disenfranchised grief, and the myth that grief follows a predictable timeline. They discuss why grief cannot be fixed, the importance of being witnessed rather than advised, and how community, ritual, and meaning-making can help us navigate life's most difficult transitions.
Whether you're grieving, caregiving, supporting someone you love, or simply preparing for the realities of being human, this conversation offers wisdom, validation, and hope.
In this episode, we discuss:
• Why grief is much broader than death and bereavement
• Anticipatory grief and grieving losses before they happen
• Ambiguous loss and caregiving for loved ones with dementia or Alzheimer's
• Disenfranchised grief and the losses society often minimizes
• Why grief and gratitude can coexist
• The myth of closure and the myth of a grief timeline
• How grief affects both mind and body
• The healing power of grief circles and community support
• Meaning-making as a pathway through loss
• Practical ways to care for yourself while grieving
• How to support someone who is grieving without trying to fix them
Resources and Mentions
Dr. Larey Swanson’s company website, Grief Circle information, and newsletter sign-up:
Achieve Health & Wellness Coaching https://www.achievehealthandwellnesscoaching.com/
Larey’s LinkedIn profile: https://www.linkedin.com/in/larey-swanson-889822146/
Book recommendation: Loss, Trauma, and Resilience: Therapeutic Work with Ambiguous Loss by Pauline Boss (paid link) https://amzn.to/4dNS6EN
Book recommendation: The Myth of Closure by Pauline Boss (paid link) https://amzn.to/4dNS6EN
Website: Center for Prolonged Grief at Columbia University: https://prolongedgrief.columbia.edu/
About Larey Swanson, MD:
Larey Swanson holds an M.D. from the University of Minnesota and has worked as a medical researcher, writer, integrative provider, and integrative health and wellness coach.
Her work experience combined with her personal healthcare journey has impassioned her to believe that health and wellness coaching is the missing link toward wellness in our system today.
She has personally encountered the benefits of a holistic view of health and believes that integrative health and wellness coaching combined with a focus on lifestyle medicine and behavior change expertise can cultivate the physical and mental wellness we all crave.
Through her business, Achieve Health and Wellness Coaching, Larey offers virtual grief circles, one-on-one coaching, and educational resources for individuals navigating loss, grief, caregiving, and major life transitions.
