Holly: Okay, trigger warning. If you do not like hearing about being run over in the surf, then maybe you don't want to listen to this one. ⁓ but it is a really interesting story of a woman named Lena, who actually is a former surf of the megas instructor who has been living in Nicaragua for 10 years. And she was on a surf trip in the Maldives.
Emma: Hey, Amigas, we've been putting a lot of effort into our online training platform and I want to make sure you know about it. SWA online is a membership based platform that is packed with surf tutorial videos categorized by experience level and board length. You can learn everything from how to wrap your longboard leash so it actually stays on to tips to troubleshoot backside tube riding and everything in between.
Holly: surfing a very crowded break when she was run over and had her leg completely opened up by someone's fin. And she tells a story of what it was like to experience that, the nitty gritty of all the details of getting surgery in the Maldives. But I think more interestingly,
Emma: all taught by super knowledgeable female surf coaches. There's also surf specific yoga classes, workout programs, surf edits to get you frothy and interesting and inspiring stories from women in our circle. There's both a monthly and yearly membership option, but if you're not looking to add another one of those to your collection, there's also the option to buy individual courses and workout series like our six week.
Holly: the way that she was able to use that accident to realize that she was not living in a way that was true to herself and it helped shift her life path. And now she is on a mission to teach people about etiquette, about how to be responsible in the surf and to inspire other female surfers to feel safe out there.
Emma: Surf Trip Ready Workout Program, which is probably the most popular on the platform. If you've got a retreat coming up, you definitely want to check that one out. So head over to surfwithamigas.com and click on the Surf Tutorials and tab to check it all out ⁓ and I'll see you there.
Holly: So those people that don't know, tell us where you are.
Layna: Okay, I'm in southern Nicaragua ⁓ in a town called Hacienda, I'm in front of Playa Colorado and then Ponca Drops. So two very fun diverse waves.
Holly: Awesome. Are you living in Hacienda, Guadalajara? Somehow I thought you were in Papaya.
Layna: I'm living in here, so ⁓ I've collaborated with a company called Soul Water Surf. So it's like a wellness dojo where they try to bring consciousness through surfing. So it's like a 16 person sauna, big yoga shala, ice bath, and it's right on the break. ⁓ Really good areas for like workshops, trainings, some workout devices. My friend Derek Thomas is who I collaborate with. He's like a breath work practitioner, the health guru barrel master. Yeah, it's So yeah, I'm teaching yoga and then I also help to organize groups, whether that's like surf training or...
Holly: weeds and are you teaching yoga there?
Layna: people looking for a deeper purpose, holistic coaches, anyone who wants to come enjoy Nicaragua. But what I really try to highlight in these groups is like ecotourism because there's a lot of really, really rad locals here that kind of are just like shy. So I try to empower them through these groups, like having them be the coaches out there for people coming to explore, learn more, whether their level is like super advanced and they want to get barreled or whether they're just beginners.
Holly: Okay, and so it's like, it's people coming for like a week long or like multi-day experience. It's not like wellness services for people that already live in the area and want to pop in for like the afternoon.
Layna: It's been pretty fun. So that's a good question. It's actually both because now ever since COVID, Asiyonoguan is more of like a residential community. So it's been really cool. There's a lot of kids growing up here. So yeah, there's parents, there's everybody needs it. So yeah, mostly it's groups coming in, but we also in like the slower seasons invite the community to come and do practices with us. ⁓ And yeah, we've also started a lot of like kids surf training to kind of make them feel comfortable in the big waves. It's been really fun.
Holly: Awesome. That's so cool. I know I actually had bought a lot in Hacienda, Guana when I was pregnant with my with Luna, I think, and we had envisioned kind of being a part of that and then ended up making a different decision. But I can imagine like a branching life choice that we would be there a part of that. So that's cool to imagine.
Layna: Yeah, it really changed a lot, like, because I've been coming here like 10 years and yeah, I never really, I was like, ⁓ it's just like a tourist vacation town. And then when I came and stayed for a little bit of time after COVID, I was like, well, there's like real people growing up having like normal lives here. It's kind of, what do they call it? Like a utopian oasis where it's this little, little bubble. It's a bubble, but ⁓ everybody has everything they need and it's really safe for everyone to grow up. And there's a neighboring local town. So you still get like the feel of the raw sense. of Nicaragua, definitely. So I try to integrate it all because it's the best of both worlds a little bit.
Holly: Right? Because that is a complaint for sure about that zone, the bubble aspect. ⁓
Layna: It gets tight sometimes, but we do our best.
Holly: Yeah, right on. Well, I guess like, let's start with with you and like where you grew up and how you got into surfing.
Layna: Okay, so I have no clue how I got into surfing because I grew up on the Gulf Coast of Florida where there is no waves at all except for hurricanes. luckily it was near Clearwater Beach where I grew up, St. Petersburg, and it's a beach town. So I've always grown up around the ocean. I've always been fascinated by the ocean whether it's surfing, swimming. I really love free diving as well and scuba diving. So the ocean's always been my life. It's always been my solace. And then I remember when I was like, think I must have been like 12 or I had a boogie board on one hurricane and my dad took me out and he's not really a surfer. No one in my family is a surfer actually but it just the feeling of me catching this wave on a boogie board was the best feeling ever. just wanted to keep going more and then, you things like weren't how they are today where there's surf instructors everywhere, schools teaching you how to surf. So I just remember me being with all little grom girlfriends trying to figure out how the ocean works and having the crappiest boards ever. ⁓ ⁓ But then eventually we graduated to a real surfboard and then After I graduated high school I moved to Jacksonville and that's when I really started surfing a little bit more because the main reason of why I wanted to go to college there was because you could surf. So I always had it my brain but I never really grew up in a place where I had consistent waves. Even when I was living in Florida, going through college there, ⁓ you know the waves aren't consistent in Florida but we do get some good ones. It's good when it's good and it's bad when it's bad. So I definitely have the ⁓
Holly: Nice.
Layna: Florida mentality on surfing where it's like I'm grateful for everything. ⁓ And then I eventually went to Nicaragua right when I graduated college, moved all my stuff here and just felt at home. I don't know, there's something about this place that just enamors me. Can't get enough and here I am ten years later making my life here.
Holly: Awesome. Nice. Yeah, I can't remember. Obviously we met and you were working with Surfer the Migos and were you living in Nicaragua already at that time? Like I can't remember how our paths crossed to begin with.
Layna: Yeah. I went back and forth a lot where I was struggling like do I need a real job in society or can I just be this like surfer vagabond and make a life? So I did, I think when you met me I was a little bit more of that like surf gypsy just, I I was just in, I was in Gigante living where I met Carly who introduced me to you guys. And yeah, I think I was doing some sea turtle research as volunteering, taking the Spanish school, just trying to like soak in the culture like okay, how can I have a real life here? Does this make sense? And then, yeah, and then I contacted you guys or vice versa. You guys needed help in Nicaragua and I was like, yeah, I'm here. I'm doing nothing and met you guys and then we just linked up in the north. That was my first experience in the north Nicaragua and it was so fun just being able to surf around like-minded chicas like myself and meet people, travel a little bit more. So that was a really good experience, the season I spent with the Mias. I even went to Costa Rica after, yeah, I went to Playa Grande after. It's been a few seasons there.
Holly: Awesome.
Layna: too. And then COVID killed us for a little bit.
Holly: Right. So, and then I know that you have been doing some like kind of overseas like Indo, I think, or the Maldives travel. And like one of the reasons why I wanted to reach out to you was I saw you posting on Instagram these like horrific story of a gnarly surf accident. And I wanted to, I wanted to get your take on it because it sounds like there's like a lot, a lot to say there. So can you share that story with us?
Layna: Yes, I don't even know where to start. It's a very long story and it's still being written. so yeah, I was with my partner on the time who was a professional longboarder and we had started a kind of longboarding international retreat business. We started it in Nicaragua, Southern Costa Rica and then Puerto Rico as well. So there was a few years we were just traveling around running this business together. It was really really fun just being able to like like he was a professional surfer and I was more of the grounded Wellness yogi. Let's let's come back. Let's what what is the purpose of surfing? Why do we want to be the best that we can be just kind of seeing surfing in a more conscious way? So so we yeah, we made a really good team But He also was competing on the WSL, so was kind of like a lot of moving parts going on. And I had realized that I really wasn't living for myself. I wasn't surfing for myself. Yeah, it was a really big lesson I learned from kind of living this luxurious surf travel life like I've always wanted. And it was beautiful, but yeah, there was moments where I was just like, who am I? What am I doing? Why ⁓ am in this country ⁓ and even like experienced it as I as I should be ⁓ actually kind of
Holly: Well, I'm curious to like say more about that. it sounds like that was like your dream to like travel and surf and then it wasn't all it was cracked up to be. So like what what was the part that wasn't aligned?
Layna: I think, I mean without saying too much detail, I wasn't with the right person, we didn't have the right aligned goals I can share a little bit more after I you the accident, now my mentality in surfing is not catch every wave, be the best surfer, travel to all the destinations. Now my mentality is just enjoy, be present out in the ocean, receive what the ocean gives ⁓ don't take too much, don't be ⁓ Whereas I think a lot of people in the competitive version of it and then a lot of people that would come on our retreats were just ⁓ the mindset, ⁓ like very intense, very selfish, very ego, very greedy,
Holly: so it sounds when you were doing it, ⁓ you were still in it. Like you weren't ⁓ aware ⁓ of this. And it's like through this process that you've built that awareness. Is that, I that
Layna: Absolutely, the dark times teach you what really matters,
Holly: you were you were traveling, you were doing these trips, you were ⁓ hosting people, you were trying to find the balance between like hardcore surf ⁓ and and like, why are we doing this? ⁓
Layna: Yeah, because we all want to get better. We all want to feel comfortable in the water. We all want to feel safe. with that comfortability comes skill, comes knowledge, comes that training. So there is a balance between it all. But ⁓ I think for like my sense of feeling empty with it was more of just... I was forgetting myself in it. was just supporting someone else. was supporting other people around where you can't really give when you are empty, in a way. So, like, yeah, there was times on these retreats where do it, like, no one would show up to yoga and no one would... They would just surf, surf, surf, kill themselves, surf, surf, surf, have a beer after, and then that's it. That's it. And that's fine. That's how some people are. That's okay. Everybody has their own journey. But, yeah, I think I just... to direct my intentions in a different way of what the message and what I really like to share because I mean I'm a yogi, I'm a teacher, I like to connect with people so I really like to share a deep message. Sometimes I can be a little too deep for people but I really love to share kind of what the ocean means to me and how I can find my deepest healing through that. So to wrap that all up, My partner had a contest in Abu Dhabi and I had gone to every single contest, every single contest, just draining myself traveling around the world thinking I want to travel but I'm burnt out, I'm tired, I just want to be at a home. I didn't have a sense of home. So I stayed back at this time and we weren't really doing so well either. So there was a big disconnect between us and then he was begging me, please, please, please meet me in the Maldives, we'll make it better, we'll make it better. My stomach knew it wasn't a great idea. Everything in my body knew that it wasn't the right thing to do. But my little surfer soul adventure self, I couldn't say no to go to the Maldives. Are you serious? Like the waves were perfect. I'd never been there before. There's, you know, advanced reef breaks. I want to get barreled. I want to try my skills. I want to meet new people because that was one of my favorite parts about traveling with my partner and doing these groups is that we got to meet so many people from all around the world in the surf community. Even though everything felt wrong. I still ended up going And ⁓ once I got there it was it was beautiful we connected and we were able to ⁓ Do what I love We're both extroverts talking to everybody meeting people all around the island the island welcomed and blessed ⁓ so beautifully ⁓ and I was I was able to just breathe again, but from the past of kind of this roller coaster of emotions I was experiencing, once I knew when things are good, something might happen where it doesn't become good anymore. So. I think it must have been like the fourth day I was there. it was definitely ⁓ pushing me to another level, which I love. ⁓ And had longboarding primarily for a while. And this time I brought my shortboard. I'm like, okay, I'm going to, you know, do this more performance style. And so the morning it was a little bit smaller and we decided to go to Sultan's and which was a beautiful beautiful break. I got there early before there was a lot of people, we caught so many fun waves, then, yeah, it just got really crowded all of sudden. And I remember there was like a wave on the peak I wanted to go, and then this guy kind of paddled aggressively into me, made me hit my partner, and then we dinged our boards, and it was just kind of this like energy of like, okay, what's going on here? Maybe it's time to go to the boat and just call it a day. So we, I was like, okay, I'm gonna catch
Holly: you
Layna: catch one more wave and then I think I don't know why I felt the need to switch boards with my partner. was like, I want to get the long board just so I can go on the shoulder and get away from these people and just get out of here. And even when I switched boards, I felt something in my stomach just churn, like sitting on the board like this isn't where I'm supposed to be. Kind of that same exact feeling that I kept feeling throughout the years to just like, I'm not in alignment right now. ⁓ So I was really kind of weird and shaky and then I was like, ⁓ okay, there's big wide swinging wave coming. ⁓ Maybe I'll get this one ⁓ and call it a day, get out, go to the boat, go to safety. ⁓ then before that, I remember partner Nevers like be careful with this board, but he was ⁓ going to competition after and was like, hey, this is a really special board, be careful. ⁓ planted a seed in my head of like put the board first for me. So I ended up taking this wave and then I think I like kicked off on the inside a little bit just get out get out of the way. I thought I was in a safe zone but then actually behind that wave was an even bigger wave and so I was on the inside there was people all around me ⁓ of all different levels and then I remember looking at the peak and being like wow why are there three people on that wave coming at me, one person I think ended up kicking off and then I saw the person that was, that had burned someone. So that's the only person I saw. So I naturally am like, okay I'm gonna go to the white water. Usually in a situation like that I would have maybe just thrown the board because I'm like there's too much chaos around me. I need to put myself in a safe situation because I've had surf accidents before where people hit your head, you're in the hospital getting stitches. It's not fun. Nobody, it's never fun. So I had the board in my head. I was thinking of the sharp reef if I would have thrown the board or the people around me that I got hit with my board. So I was like, okay, let me just get control. So I went to the whitewater. But then at that time I saw someone shooting at me directly from the whitewater. And I'm like, ⁓ okay, I can't be here. So then I pivoted the other way. And then at that moment, the surfer from Portugal that I just met, I saw him making a big turn up top at the peak. And I was like, ⁓ cool he's gonna cut back I'm gonna go this way and he won't hit me but for some reason I don't know if he was out of control or he definitely saw me but he decided to turn directly into me and he was actually coming ⁓ for like kind of where my kidneys are in my back and my hip because I was laying on the board ⁓ and this is all the matter of two seconds mind you this calculation that I'm having to figure out ⁓ so at that time I'm like okay I don't even have enough time to dive under and I'm thinking about my head because that was my last surf injury. I'm like I really don't want his fins to hit my head or I don't want him to hit my side and punch through my organs. So... There's actually a photo sequence of the story and that's how I know actually what happened because I didn't really know what happened at all in the moment like you know when you're full adrenaline you're not really thinking you're just acting and that's how a lot of like us surfers are in the when you're in a crowded lineup you don't really have time to think it's just like this natural calculation that you make so Yeah at that time he was coming right at me and I ended up turning my twisting my body to block my body with my leg Which I had no clue what I was doing But that actually saved my life by me doing that unconsciously. So I felt just this really deep impact on the inside of my left leg. It was like right on my calf.
Holly: you
Layna: obviously pain really come right away on an accident like that, so I felt it and I knew it was deep, I knew it was bad. ⁓ And I under for a second and I lifted up and I was like, okay, I'm in the middle of the Indian Ocean, what's gonna happen if I need to go to the hospital right now? ⁓ And I like, okay, I'm gonna just look at my leg, because I couldn't feel it, but I felt like warm, hot, you know, blood, obviously. ⁓ And when picked it up, ⁓ there was I saw flesh, I saw bone. It was the biggest cut I've ever seen on my body. And I couldn't feel it. I couldn't feel anything. I couldn't feel my leg at all. ⁓ And then I looked at the guy who hit me, recognizing who it was. And he so casually just said, ⁓ My bad, are you okay? And I just looked him in the eye. didn't know, Holly, I didn't know I could scream like this before, but it was like this scream that just, it wasn't me, it just came out from like this deepest part of fear on me, and it stopped the entire lineup. just, it shook and that scream still vibrates like within my body. So, so yeah, I just looked him in the screamed, ⁓ and then I saw, ⁓ ⁓ There's more sets coming at me and I was just like my only thought luckily is like fight-or-flight survival Get to the boat, Laina, get to the boat and then we can assess what's going to happen So we're getting rattled by these waves luckily nobody's going on the waves because they saw the drama dramatic scene that was going on there so ⁓ So yeah, once the waves kind of surpassed I still had the longboard so I was paddling very very fast. I was paddling faster than than I ever paddled in my life. And my brain's like wobbling in and out of consciousness. My heart's beating, adrenaline's like running through me. And then this is when I saw something that like I've never seen before in my life. Because I was about to lose consciousness, I believe, just from adrenaline, shock, a lot of blood being lost. ⁓ So when I looked up into the sky, I'll get a little deep and spiritual now, I looked up into the sky and was like, do I just pass out? What do I do? It's like, am I supposed to do right now? Do I fight? Do I surrender? What do I do? like I started to lose vision a little bit. Like I don't know if you guys have ever passed out where it's like in and out, everything's white, then it's black and like you can't hear. So I started to think pass out, but then when I looked up, it was like this pink and purple swirling cloud around me. And it was like it was sunsetting, but it wasn't, it was midday. And I was like, what is that? and it was like I wasn't in my body anymore I connected to this energy whatever that was and I felt it like engulf me and I didn't feel fear at all I didn't feel uncertainty I didn't feel anything I just felt safe and there's no words that really describe what it was but it was just this knowing of you belong here you're safe all you have to do is trust people to help you so let go let go completely you are a fighter, but you're also surrendering to this moment. Get to the boat and all you need to do is trust that everybody's going to be there to help you. And it was one of the most beautiful spiritual messages.
Holly: was there any conscious thought like where what did the self talk go to like, okay, I've gotten run over my legs really messed up. I'm in ⁓ a boat in the middle of nowhere. ⁓
Layna: That was my first thought. How is this journey going to be to get me to the hospital? I'm so far away from everywhere. Am I going to have enough strength to stay conscious during this trip? Am I going to have enough strength to not bleed out? So I didn't know where it hit me. I just saw my leg wide open. I didn't know if it was an artery, if it was a muscle, if the bone was broken. I had no clue what it was. I just knew it was bad. So my first thought was like, don't lose all this blood because you're going to pass out. So yeah, I was just thinking more of like, get to the boat and take it step by step because I have no clue what to do.
Holly: And your partner, had he realized that you were in this situation?
Layna: Yeah, so he was actually screaming at the guy that hit me and in my head I was just like, no, just come help me please. ⁓ But I was actually paddling so fast that nobody could catch up with me. It was crazy. Like I heard this, like I couldn't hear a lot. I couldn't really comprehend a lot ever since that cloud spoke to me. ⁓ So I heard him kind of screaming. I heard his voice. And then I also heard ⁓ our friend who we met prior, his name was Joaquin. beautiful man from Uruguay who helped me a lot. I heard him just screaming, paddle Lena, paddle, paddle, paddle. So, and I could feel how far away they were from me. ⁓ So that kind of like that voice brought me back into the present moment when I heard him scream. So I was almost halfway to the boat by then. ⁓ And then we had ⁓ another friend that we had met, Amber, ⁓ who was closer to the boat. So she actually got there before me. And then the moment I was probably like feet away from the boat, I felt this big push behind me and that was my partner. It finally cut out to me and was like, I will help you get into the boat, kind of. I had, after I had that little vision, it kind of told me to disconnect your brain from your body. Don't be in your pain body right now. It doesn't exist. Like you just have to fight right now. So I kind of was numb. I didn't really know how to move at that point, but I could feel my upper body. So it was the last moment I knew that I needed to put a little bit of exertion on my leg. So I took myself off the board into the water so I could pull myself up on the boat and I just I felt someone lift me I don't know who was touching me at this point but I felt someone kind of lurch me up and then Amber was on the boat and kind of helped pulled me up and then at that moment I finally like felt like okay I'm out of the ocean right now I know that I'm in a little bit more safety than I was before and then I listened to that little voice it was just turn your brain off go inward and focus on your breath and everybody else will take care of you. So I just put my hand on my face because I didn't want my eyes to trick me anymore with the colors or passing out. It was too much, it was overwhelming, the amount of sensories. So I put my hand on my face and I just laid there and I felt people come onto the boat. There was probably like eight people coming onto the boat. Everybody was nervous. Everybody was freaking out. What do we do? What do we do? And luckily Amber's husband was like a super, super boy scout and knew how to handle trauma. And so I think just out of respect, they ⁓ were like, hey, Tony, can you put the tourniquet on her? So we took a surfboard leash and ⁓ a rash guard and he put it around my leg. But I think it just, he was very nervous, didn't know what to do exactly in that situation. So they put it on wrong. Actually, they put it on like, on top of the cut and then that was the first time that I remembered pain. So I was like I was in this really tranquil peaceful place like yes everybody's gonna help me and then all of sudden it was like electricity back in my body. ⁓ my god I'm here this is reality this is raw this is happening and my body was like trembling and shaking and then I was just like okay breathe let that wave of emotion pass come back let go let go.
Holly: Thanks for watching.
Layna: And then I felt something really, really tight on the top of my knee. And then it just like, all the sensation stopped. So then at that moment I knew that it was applied properly. Because I couldn't feel a thing after that I felt you know really really tight squeezing But it was crazy that pressure that you put on my body was like calmed me And I guess that's what you're supposed to do when you apply a tourniquet is just like take control because My body was like seizing and shaking so I would have yeah, could have like hurt myself Just if it was applied wrong again So once it was applied I I heard the boat captain he went full force. There's like boards flying everywhere People are jumping around everywhere holding me down. My body is like flying. He's going so so fast to get to the island and at that moment I knew we were going it was this little clinic on Himafushi. They also that same kind of Omen like ominous deja vu every time I passed it I would walk to get coffee and I would look at it like Creepy like it was just like a dark ominous vibe and I knew and this was like days before
Holly: You're like, damn it, I'm going to that spot.
Layna: I knew exactly where I was going. So yeah, we eventually made it back to the dock, which was so slippery, so unstable, just everything that could go wrong at all. I'm like, OK, how am I even going to get off this boat right now? I have no clue. And I opened my eyes at one point just to kind of like see if I still had vision. And I saw I saw the guy who hit me. And it like brought me to this dark space and I just had to go back. And I started kind of trembling again. And then I saw And he was like praying, was like begging, like, I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry. And I even felt bad for him at that moment actually, because I was like, wow, the reverse situation, if that was me that hit someone, I would actually feel a hundred times worse than how I feel right now, which is crazy to think about that. ⁓ So I guess they brought a backboard down to the boat and I just felt kind of like remembering surrender surrender surrender so I felt them lift me onto the backboard and The boat was rocking everything was so unstable and I'm like I could freak out at this moment I could freak out and just Completely lose it but then I was like no trust trust trust they got you they got you so instead I just engaged my core and was like I'm stable, I'm stable and the moment I felt us like touch the land, that was the next stage of I'm even safer than I was before. So then I opened my eyes and I saw like I was embarrassed because I saw just this little chaos that I was causing on this peaceful little island. I saw the locals that were kind of, you know, linking up with me before that we made a connection with and I just I went inward. was like, ⁓ God, I'm causing all this chaos. can't like why am I thinking that at that
Holly: you you
Layna: moment you know it's just there was so many waves of emotions that were passing through me and then I got to the ambulance and I'd never been in an ambulance before and I was already I was having like more anxiety attacks like when I'm in an ambulance in the middle of nowhere like I can just thinking about my parents I'm like I can't even imagine if they knew what was happening to me right now it's like 3 a.m. while they're where they're at I don't remember much of that travel but I remember I my partner leaving to go get my passport and get money so we could go to the hospital and do the surgery. But I remember him leaving and me feeling so like, I'm alone, I'm alone, I'm alone. Why would he leave me? Just kind ⁓ of triggered. But then there was the most important thing, which also happened on the boat, was someone was always holding my hand. And I could feel just like the pulse of someone else's heartbeat reminding me that I wasn't gonna fade away, like that I wasn't going to pass out. I wasn't gonna lose consciousness. So it was really beautiful how every single one of them knew, like don't let go of Lena's hand. And they were passing off my hand and I feeling different energies. So once I got into the clinic, I could. I remember hearing just like my vitals, I could hear my own heartbeat and I opened my eyes a little bit and then that was the first time I spoke. was like, this was probably been an hour since the accident now. And I just said, am I going to be okay? And the nurse, she was so beautiful. She had this like red sarong on her head and a golden nose ring and the sunlight was shining in. And she was like, of course you're going to be okay. You're in a safe place. that just, it warmed me and I went back into this little beautiful space that I was in for a while but then they ended up taking off the tourniquet and then that's when I felt everything again and they ended up cleaning it a little bit and yeah I just I kind of blacked out at that moment because it was just so much sensation and I heard the I heard the nurse and then the owner of the hotel kind of like not arguing but very stressfully speaking of like when's the ferry coming we need to get it's not soon enough like what hospital is she gonna go to so even
Holly: Thank
Layna: Even though it was stressful and was uncertain, I knew that they were taking the best care of me that anybody possibly could and I was going to be okay. So eventually I left that clinic, back into the ambulance, Yeah, they eventually loaded me onto the ferry. It's a public ferry, leaves every hour. I'm my bikini soaking wet, I'm in my rash guard and as you know the culture in the Maldives, like you're supposed to be covered up. ⁓ So it really like uncomfortable for a lot of people. ⁓ So yeah, ⁓ I don't know why I couldn't take my rash guard off. I was just freezing. I couldn't think of anything. Yeah, and then also like, where am I going? How's the surgery going? Because the accident itself wasn't even the traumatic part. It was just the journey to repair my leg was actually what was the most traumatic. So yeah, so we went to the boat, ferry, loads of people. I remember there was this man, very loud man that was like sitting at my feet. Luckily, I had Joaquin and Tony there with me. Joaquin came. It was really sweet. He didn't even know us and just wanted to come help me. So they were like both kind of holding me as I'm like,
Holly: Yeah.
Layna: shaking and my waves of emotions were just kind of more fear before that but then it started to change because I don't know, I just in a different setting and my consciousness was coming back a little bit. I was able to speak again. the guy at my feet was like yelling, like yelling at them, this is what you need to do, this is what you need to do, this. And it like, gave me so much anxiety. And I know he was just trying to help. And at that time I opened my eyes and I like just to look at who it was. And then I saw all the blood on my leg. then ⁓ I saw that blood I kind of like got really really dizzy and just laid back down and started to cry. Yeah, but it's...
Holly: And isn't it all like wrapped up, but you're just bleeding?
Layna: bleeding a lot. later I found out it was just like an inch below the artery. So it wasn't fatal of like spewing blood everywhere, but there was a lot of blood, blood bleed lost. So yeah, it was like, I felt, I just saw like the crimson color all over my leg, the blood all over the, all over the fairy seat.
Holly: Yeah, you're like having the realization of like, I'm really hurt right now.
Layna: So then once I kind of dropped into that space of not fear, but more of I'm safe, I'm protected, I just had this huge clarity of like how can I share this story to change the global etiquette of surfing? How can I share my story to bring more compassion into the lineup and not this greedy, egotistical, every wave is mine, I'm the best surfer in the lineup, I deserve all the best waves. It's just like...
Holly: But do you think that that was what was happening in your situation?
Layna: I think a lot of it was due to overcrowded aggression and also just people not being at the right way for their level. Which is also, there's a lot of things, I think, that have become in the evolution of surfing where it's just so easily accessible for people and some people don't realize how dangerous certain things could be. So I think that like my biggest thing that I thought was bad about the situation was that This person should have pulled off the wave when they saw how much chaos was going on You know how easy it is just to kick off the back of the wave But this person decided to cut back directly into me just to not lose a section as he burned someone and I don't want to point blame on anybody because there's accidents that happen, but I do know that There's a lot of ways to prevent these accidents from happening and I see it all the time in the town I live in from surfing all over the world just really really close calls that people think are just casual I'm like no that's life or death right there just for you to make that section ⁓ And I know just from surfing like surfing with the Amigas surfing with my personal girlfriends I have here. It's like we don't do that in the water. We're friendly We share ways we call people into waves like I feel more stoked watching my friends catch a wave and if I want to like get all the greediness of the wave myself so yeah, it was more of like how can we share to make This global etiquette a little bit more out of compassion than more out of like selfish surfing. ⁓ And just having the proper education, having the proper wisdom to be in a certain level. And I'm not saying like people's children belong at a certain break. It's more of like find the break that's the best for your level there. If you're not
Holly: I just want to say that's gnarly. super what you experience and ⁓ I ⁓ totally get why you would be ⁓ to ⁓ and deserving to cry and those real emotions and also, ⁓ like, you're so lucky that it could have been You like you said, they could have your ⁓ kidneys or ⁓ actually hit an artery. So, like, it is ⁓ like, ⁓ you're lucky. And it sounded like you, you know, you had some like really great inner strength and were able to have those spiritual component and all that to get you through it. like thinking about what could have done differently, like it is so hard, especially when you're talking about the Maldives, because like I know like, serve with me, as we did two years of retreats in the Maldives and like, know like Ed Normal at our other locations all around the world. We break people up into groups by ability level and like take them to different spots. But I know that logistically it's hard in the Maldives because you've just got the one boat and you've got the one, you what do they call it? The Donnie, like the little boat, you know? And they just, take everybody from that boat to the same spot. And so you might have like vastly different ability levels. And it's at that point, it's not actually the people's fault.
Layna: Mm-hmm. Yeah. It's a boat, sir. No.
Holly: Because they don't actually know any better. And in fact, in some of the Amiga retreats, they would have preferred to go to a different spot. But just the way that the logistics are, you just can't do it.
Layna: Yes. Yeah, and that's what a lot of the knowledge that I want to share and that what I've actively been taking action on here is like, okay, these people that are in charge of those groups, take accountability or just don't like, it's not about catching every single wave, it's about teaching people the proper safety, teaching them the proper, what's your intention about surfing? so yeah it's like taking accountability for ⁓ people that you're in charge of in the ocean and also what's your influence ⁓ that's not even if you are a ⁓ instructor but also just being a surfer a top surfer out there how are you influencing others And how can you be a greater influence when you're in the water instead of just being selfish?
Holly: ⁓ I agree with you Like anybody that's listened to my take on etiquette knows that like ⁓ you're preaching to the choir here. ⁓ But I do also ⁓ that it is hard people like it again, like using Maldives is a specific example or even Nicaragua. ⁓ It looks like people this is their one week vacation that they have waited eight months or a year or more than they've saved up for. ⁓
Layna: Yeah. I'm hungry.
Holly: And maybe the waves haven't been good for the first four days. And now finally there's good waves. every, it's a really hard argument to make, especially for you and I, the types that we live in. mean, maybe not where I live right at this moment, but we surf good waves relatively a lot. You know, we're not in landlocked wherever New York city or San Francisco or somewhere where the waves aren't that good that often. And we haven't spent, you know,
Layna: Mm-hmm. Yeah. Yeah.
Holly: Thousands and thousands of dollars and taking time away from work and family to go this one dream trip on the dream day Like it's it's really hard to convince people who are out there That they should like chill out and not catch so many weights or kick out of a wave that they've waited two hours for Because there's like five people paddling on the inside, you know, like it is a really hard argument to make
Layna: So I mean, after like a lot of just, I don't know, guess, contemplation on it, I mean, one of the solutions I think that I try is like, the people who are in charge of those people, I try to have them be like the people that have the local respect in the lineup, it also comes with like taking the time to look at this well, look at the report. ⁓ maybe there is spot that this is gonna be great where it's gonna be empty, where there's not gonna be as many people or ⁓ a place where there's not gonna be loads of beginners in front of you that you have to navigate if you don't the control to navigate ⁓ in front of. So ⁓ yeah, it's just about like trying to, ⁓ I think, take the time, ⁓ put in the to plan ⁓ and that balance of safety and stoke because ⁓ but ⁓
Holly: I hear you and as one of those people myself that is in that position and also has those values ⁓ that, ⁓ know, 100%. of course. it's not good for anyone to take clients out into crowded waves. The clients ⁓ are frustrated, the ⁓ local whether they be or actual people who are born in the place that you are, like they're not happy. Nobody's, it's not good for anyone, but. ⁓ Sometimes it just is what it is based on the tide or the swell or the wind or the situation that day or Somebody comes to you and they say hey my dream is to serve salt and I came on this trip to serve salt and you know they're capable of surfing sultans, but Sultans is firing and everybody is out. You know, it's like
Layna: maybe let's not go there. ⁓
Holly: But how? This person has paid you $5,000 for a week and that's what they say. I came because I want to sultans and the waves are firing. It's a really tough, and who am I to say you can't serve sultans? You're not good enough or whatever. We do sometimes, believe me, we will sometimes tell people, we're not going to go there. It's not a good idea.
Layna: I know. you Yeah. Yeah. Right. Yeah, yeah. It's a controversial topic. ⁓ It really is ⁓ especially with just like the way the ⁓ is kind of growing in a lot of these areas where a lot of, yeah, they're just not used to it. It's not just, yeah.
Holly: One, there's that argument. Like, again, I feel like I'm on the opposite side of this argument than I normally am. I'm normally arguing your side, so I'm just gonna, like, sit in the other chair to, have the discussion. Because I wanna say again, like, I get it. I agree with you. I'm definitely, like, on your side. But I also know that there are problems because these people are adults and the ocean is for everyone. Right? So, like, it's one thing, I think, if people are,
Layna: Ocean is for everyone.
Holly: beginners, know, like if you are, if you don't know how to turn a roll, then you shouldn't be surfing at Sultan's like, for example, like that's easy. It's easy to do that. Hey, for your safety and the safety of everyone else in the water, like, I'm sorry, I can't let you go out there. Like that's easy. But the question is when it's like, you know, this person that you're talking about that ran you over and you, both of you are competent surfers. Like neither one of you don't have the skills to be out there, you know, and probably the guy that the whatever his name is dropped in on.
Layna: Yeah. Okay. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. ⁓ huh.
Holly: that person was probably a competent surfer. And I bet that at least one of the other people around you paddling out, all of y'all probably would have been totally fine skill-wise surfing that break. And yet the accident happened. And that's where I feel like it gets tricky. Like who gets to decide who's allowed to surf there and who's not? Like, it just, yeah, go ahead.
Layna: Mm-hmm. ⁓ Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. So I think overall is just like more awareness and more compassion through all aspects. The coaches, the instructors, the surfers, the local, everybody. Just awareness, compassion. I think that's what's gonna be the best. But as we're saying with the froth meter, that's hard to think about that. And even like, know you're a frother, I'm a frother. Like of course we forget about that sometimes. just, you when you're on a wave you feel the
Holly: Yeah.
Layna: electricity and you're just like I'm going I see my line I don't care who I scare in the way sometimes that happens it's it's it's it's a human thing that we have but
Holly: And like you said in your situation, like it also happens so fast where, you know, like I have, I serve crowd waves and like, I am one of the ones like you're talking about. not kicking out. mean, eventually, yeah, if I actually think I'm gonna hit them, I will kick out. But like lots and lots of time I see them and their panics. I'm going to hit them. And I'm like, dude, chill. I'm not going to hit you. I'm in control. I'm to go right around, you know?
Layna: Two seconds. Yeah. And then that's the problem is, yeah, it's the panicking. So... That's another part of what I wanted to share too is my journey back into the ocean. Because it didn't stop after this. was ⁓ like what you said, the panicking, it only makes it worse. Kind like when you're driving a car and you're like, do I merge? Do I merge? And if you hesitate, it makes it so much more dangerous when you hesitate instead of having that kind of confidence with it. ⁓ know if you want me to share the rest of the hospital journey. ⁓
Holly: Sure. What did you end up doing?
Layna: All of sudden, I just find myself in literally the back of a truck, back of a pickup truck, ⁓ with ⁓ Tony and Joaquin there. And I was like laughing at this I'm because I'm like, I'm in the of a pickup truck ⁓ in the bell leaves. My leg's wide open. I have no clue if it's broken. And then that's when reality hit a little bit and Tony looked at me and he goes, we're in the hospital. And then that's when reality hit a little bit and Tony looked at me and he goes, we're in the hospital. to get your surgery. And that's when I went so inward. Because I'm like, wait, I have to go get a surgery now? After all I've just been through, I'm so weak. I have nothing left in me. I have to go get stabbed and prodded and see if I'm going to be OK now? So yeah, without getting into too much detail of it, it was very intense. It was very, very gnarly, just the whole process of it, just getting transferred from room to room. After all I've just been through, I'm so weak. ⁓ it was very intense. It was very, very gnarly, just the whole process of it, Not being in a different culture not understanding the language not understanding what was going on half the time like I felt like a test subject almost like getting poked and prodded Not being in a different culture not understanding the language not understanding what was going on half the time like I felt like a test subject almost like getting poked and prodded I was getting edgy and frustrated at that point. I was getting edgy and frustrated at that point. ⁓ So ⁓ yeah, eventually I think I ended up, they ended up giving me this pain medication after all of that. I was like, wow. ⁓
Holly: Shh!
Layna: I can relax now a little bit. And the guy was so sweet. He's like, just relax. This will make your nerves go away. So then they transported me to another room. And that's when I kind of freaked out because they're like, OK, the surgeon will be ready in six hours. And I'm like, what am I supposed to do? Lay here for six hours and wait? Can't drink anything, can't eat anything, can't do anything. I'm freezing cold still in my wet bikini and just with a towel over me. And I no phone service. I had nothing.
Holly: Yes. Oof.
Layna: I couldn't have anything to distract my brain at that moment, except for like the little drip of the IV. And I think I actually was alone at that point because everybody who was helping me had went to get lunch because they need to eat, they need to take care of themselves too. And then I tried to listen to this podcast of like, when you're ready to heal, that was the time. So I started listening to it to just try to like take my brain off. And it brought me into this dark spiral. And then I started hyperventilating. I started crying. Like I was having an anxiety attack, my first anxiety attack I've ever.
Holly: What?
Layna: had and because I was alone completely and I guess it was only 10 minutes according to my partner at the time but it felt like ages it felt like hours and then once he finally came back then that's when he finally let me cry and I cried a lot but it was like a it was like a release cry as me thinking about okay I'm not gonna be able to surf I'm not gonna be able to ride horses I'm not gonna be able to freed I'm not gonna be able to be myself for even longer now and it came back to that omen of like I wasn't actually living for myself prior either. ⁓ I can't do yoga. I can't do anything for like months. I'm just thinking about my healing process. So it's like I'm not even present. I'm just thinking about the future. I'm thinking about I'm begging the nurse like please give me gas like put me out. I'm tired of fighting for my consciousness. Like I just want to be out right now and and then the eventually time passed and it was time for the surgery and that they like tricked me from separating from my partner because I kind of knew that I was anxious and like they just brought me into this room and that I never saw him until before the surgery so I was like wow like I'm completely alone right now on this journey I'm 100 % alone And yeah, so by the time I finally got into the surgical room, like no one has shoes on, they're all barefoot. It's like crazy. I'm like, I'm about to get surgery. No one even has shoes on because they all, you know, their religion. ⁓ So I kind of laughed at that point. I'm like, wow, this is me right now. Like, I'm just going to surrender. This is almost funny. ⁓ yeah, guess it's like once the moment that you actually have to act is the moment that you become the bravest. I guess it's like once the moment that you actually have to act is the moment that you become the bravest. So once he asked me to stand up to put the needle in my I'm just like, alright, this is it, this is the end. If I never feel my leg again, whatever, here we go. I'm in full surrender and at least I'm here in a safe place. yeah, he gave me the epidural. It was horrible. I don't know if you've had one before. It's not that fun. But then after it went through, I had like a little bit of sedative that he gave me. So I kind of was like in and out of consciousness. And before I knew it, it was done. I see the anesthesiologist.
Holly: else.
Layna: like so like, oh it's beautiful like and I'm like how many stitches are there and he's like I don't know more than a hundred and I'm just like what like why are y'all laughing about this right now like this is crazy so so yeah and then eventually I finished and I remember being in the waiting room like I couldn't feel anything I couldn't even move my face I couldn't move anything my entire body was numb I felt like the toxic antibiotics everything just pumping through my veins because I'm usually like a natural person I don't even take Advil when I have a headache, so I'm just like wow there's poison pumping through me right now, but it's poison that's saving me right now And I know I need this poison so it was yeah It was pretty pretty intense like my back hurts so so bad so laying there for almost eight hours And I couldn't move I couldn't roll to the side that were like yelling at me like stop trying to move like They're like you can't you can't move your head or else you're gonna have a headache from this ⁓ so yeah, I eventually In a short story long stayed in the hospital for three more nights And ⁓ but what really kept me through was that after I got out of the surgery I saw that my partner had made a post about it and I looked at my messages and there was like the most messages I've ever received on my phone there was so much love like pouring into me just from like a little tiny notice of like haste and lane of some love and I Got some of the most beautiful messages I've ever received in my life and it It was just such a pure, it gave me hope for the surf community. So yeah, we ended up having a GoFundMe on there, raised enough money to get me into a first class ticket so I could fly the way home. But there was ⁓ the first night I stayed in the hospital, I had one of the most insane attacks I've ever had. ⁓ It just like, ⁓ I don't know. woke up in the middle of the night not remembering how to breathe. And I think it was my nervous system, just like after going through so much of that adrenaline, my nervous system coming back. And it was triggered by someone screaming next to me in the hospital, because there's thin walls, there's not a lot of privacy. And it was like someone screaming in the middle of the night. And then I just woke me up. I couldn't breathe. I couldn't focus. I couldn't do anything. And unfortunately, those anxiety attacks continued for at least a month after the whole process. then just fast-forwarding went back to my parents house and they helped me heal they were so so sweet ⁓ they have a really slow space their pace very you know retired and just ⁓ loving so it was the best place I could have ever landed ⁓ you know ⁓ just physically but also also like me emotionally healing from just my kind of next chapter in life, like me purging out what wasn't serving me and then back to a place, back to my roots and the house I grew up in, just remembering myself essentially, relearning how to walk in the same grass I learned how to walk when I was a baby. was a very beautiful experience. ⁓ And then eventually ⁓ we had group plant in Nicaragua actually and that was my goal. I was like, I'm going to walk so I can make it to this retreat in Nicaragua. And I actually ended up learning how to re-walk for in like three weeks I think. It was so fast. Nobody could believe it. The physical therapist, nobody could believe it. And luckily, like thank you so much for everybody who supported me. I was able to like get through my medical bills, get through everything from the GoFundMe and just the love from the surf community. My first time back into the was so, so emotional. And I was on the same board I was on. I remember putting my feet on the board and just feeling the anxiety, but also feeling like you're back home. ⁓ You're back home. I'll never forget that journey back into the ocean. And then fast forwarding, I stayed in Nicaragua a little bit longer just so I could heal. ⁓ And I got my first wave again. I started walking on the beach. I started running. That's when I met my current business partner here, Derek, where he offered training in the sauna, do your physical therapy in the sauna with me. Like, let's get back, let's get back. So it was like I found my home, essentially. I found my crew of like, support when I felt all alone a little bit. yeah, I remember being with my friend, a super powerful badass surfer who I caught my first wave. It was at Colorado, so it was just this perfect size. Sun was out. The water was blue. All my girlfriends around cheering me on. And yeah, I just remember that electric feeling of just... Writing that wave of like remembering like okay, because I would I didn't know after that I remember telling my dad right after the accident happened I'm never gonna surf again. I don't want any more accidents like this, so it just this big fear overcame And I think that's actually when I wrote you, because I was searching, how do I overcome this trauma and get back into the water? And I saw one of your blogs, and I wrote you, and you just said, hey, just write me an email. And then I ended up writing this whole entire story that I sent to you a year later. And here we all four circles.
Holly: I do.
Layna: So even just like that little, yeah, just write me an email. It made ⁓ write this amazing, healing story that now I'm working to publish.
Holly: Did you find it helpful to get it out of you and onto the page?
Layna: It was really hard, and it took me a long time to write it. ⁓ It's basically me reliving everything and putting it into detail. And yeah, I'll share it once it's published. It goes into really, really deep detail of just the raw emotions that I was feeling and just the deepest amount of pain. But I remember someone writing me like, Only in the deepest moments of fear is when you can progress to your highest level. So it's like we need to have those moments in order to catapult to the next level of what you're doing, whether that's through surfing or energetically holding the space of whatever your goal is here. Only in the deepest moments of fear is when you can progress to your highest level. So it's like we need to have those moments in order to catapult to the next level of what you're doing, whether that's through surfing or energetically holding the space of whatever your goal is here. ⁓
Holly: Well, yeah, and you mentioned that through going through this experience, made you realize that you weren't living for yourself. So what, what changes did you make or how did you, how have you changed since then?
Layna: That's a good question. So I have a lot more, I guess, patience, awareness, and gratitude every time I'm in the ocean. So just me. being able to have the ability to touch the ocean every day was just as beautiful as writing a big massive barrel that I was trying to get. So me going back into the ocean with this more heightened awareness of gratitude for each moment, ⁓ I don't have to catch all the waves that come to I don't have to froth out all day every day thinking I need to be in the ocean, surfing the waves. there was so many times, ⁓ so I came to ⁓ here and was Pongas in the off season because there's nobody out. I didn't want to be around a crowd at all. ⁓ So ⁓ it ⁓ me ⁓ connection to ocean, which in an extension ⁓ is my connection myself. ⁓ So I was to be with myself alone. So I ended up, you know, splitting with my partner because ⁓ our lives just weren't working together, I ended up putting more energy and work into myself rather, into my strength, my surfing, but also what am I doing with my life? ⁓ And it brought me to the best possible place that I could ever be in my life. I feel like the strongest, highest version of myself. So basically that accident purged out what, I wasn't listening to myself and I knew I wasn't listening to myself. So it like purged that away in a really, really dark way and brought me this light. ⁓ where I was able to rebuild my foundation, where now I am here in Nicaragua hosting this space for surfers with a deeper consciousness, people who want to come heal. ⁓ I've also started a thing with one of my best friends here called the Mariposa Wave Club where we're teaching little girls how to be confident in the water, but not only how to be confident, but also how to be compassionate, how to connect, how to find a deeper meaning from it and not be intimidated from all these guy rippers out here because the younger boys are rippers and the little girls are kind of intimidated. So yeah, it brought me to just know that I do have the power ⁓ to a change ⁓ in the water and I can't it alone. It's with the tribe that you have and it's not about girls and guys, about ⁓ everybody coming as one. ⁓ So. Yeah, it brought me to a lot of realizations where now I can truly live for myself and truly enjoy every moment as the ocean is a healing solace for us all. That's what you preach and that's what these podcasts are about. It's just how can we find their deepest meaning through all of our experiences through surfing. Or just being me.
Holly: Awesome. Epic. Well, thank you so much for all that you're doing in Southern Nicaragua and for sharing your story with us. And I know it was hard to live through, so I appreciate you going there. ⁓ I think it's a lot of people's, like, worst fear to experience that. So it's really inspiring to hear about how you were able to get through it and turn it into a positive. So I appreciate you. I appreciate you. and thank you for sharing with us.
Layna: course, thank you for having the space and having the outlet to share because that's the hardest part is getting it out there. can write it, we can talk about it, but how do we reach this to the people who actually are going to take it in and use it for good. So thank you for all you do with the female empowerment and just surfing empowerment in the world. You're an inspiration for me.
Holly: Awesome, thank you.
Emma: Hey, Amigas, we've been putting a lot of effort into our online training platform and I want to make sure you know about it. SWA online is a membership based platform that is packed with surf tutorial videos categorized by experience level and board length. You can learn everything from how to wrap your longboard leash so it actually stays on to tips to troubleshoot backside tube riding and everything in between.
Holly: surfing a very crowded break when she was run over and had her leg completely opened up by someone's fin. And she tells a story of what it was like to experience that, the nitty gritty of all the details of getting surgery in the Maldives. But I think more interestingly,
Emma: all taught by super knowledgeable female surf coaches. There's also surf specific yoga classes, workout programs, surf edits to get you frothy and interesting and inspiring stories from women in our circle. There's both a monthly and yearly membership option, but if you're not looking to add another one of those to your collection, there's also the option to buy individual courses and workout series like our six week.
Holly: the way that she was able to use that accident to realize that she was not living in a way that was true to herself and it helped shift her life path. And now she is on a mission to teach people about etiquette, about how to be responsible in the surf and to inspire other female surfers to feel safe out there.
Emma: Surf Trip Ready Workout Program, which is probably the most popular on the platform. If you've got a retreat coming up, you definitely want to check that one out. So head over to surfwithamigas.com and click on the Surf Tutorials and tab to check it all out ⁓ and I'll see you there.
Holly: So those people that don't know, tell us where you are.
Layna: Okay, I'm in southern Nicaragua ⁓ in a town called Hacienda, I'm in front of Playa Colorado and then Ponca Drops. So two very fun diverse waves.
Holly: Awesome. Are you living in Hacienda, Guadalajara? Somehow I thought you were in Papaya.
Layna: I'm living in here, so ⁓ I've collaborated with a company called Soul Water Surf. So it's like a wellness dojo where they try to bring consciousness through surfing. So it's like a 16 person sauna, big yoga shala, ice bath, and it's right on the break. ⁓ Really good areas for like workshops, trainings, some workout devices. My friend Derek Thomas is who I collaborate with. He's like a breath work practitioner, the health guru barrel master. Yeah, it's So yeah, I'm teaching yoga and then I also help to organize groups, whether that's like surf training or...
Holly: weeds and are you teaching yoga there?
Layna: people looking for a deeper purpose, holistic coaches, anyone who wants to come enjoy Nicaragua. But what I really try to highlight in these groups is like ecotourism because there's a lot of really, really rad locals here that kind of are just like shy. So I try to empower them through these groups, like having them be the coaches out there for people coming to explore, learn more, whether their level is like super advanced and they want to get barreled or whether they're just beginners.
Holly: Okay, and so it's like, it's people coming for like a week long or like multi-day experience. It's not like wellness services for people that already live in the area and want to pop in for like the afternoon.
Layna: It's been pretty fun. So that's a good question. It's actually both because now ever since COVID, Asiyonoguan is more of like a residential community. So it's been really cool. There's a lot of kids growing up here. So yeah, there's parents, there's everybody needs it. So yeah, mostly it's groups coming in, but we also in like the slower seasons invite the community to come and do practices with us. ⁓ And yeah, we've also started a lot of like kids surf training to kind of make them feel comfortable in the big waves. It's been really fun.
Holly: Awesome. That's so cool. I know I actually had bought a lot in Hacienda, Guana when I was pregnant with my with Luna, I think, and we had envisioned kind of being a part of that and then ended up making a different decision. But I can imagine like a branching life choice that we would be there a part of that. So that's cool to imagine.
Layna: Yeah, it really changed a lot, like, because I've been coming here like 10 years and yeah, I never really, I was like, ⁓ it's just like a tourist vacation town. And then when I came and stayed for a little bit of time after COVID, I was like, well, there's like real people growing up having like normal lives here. It's kind of, what do they call it? Like a utopian oasis where it's this little, little bubble. It's a bubble, but ⁓ everybody has everything they need and it's really safe for everyone to grow up. And there's a neighboring local town. So you still get like the feel of the raw sense. of Nicaragua, definitely. So I try to integrate it all because it's the best of both worlds a little bit.
Holly: Right? Because that is a complaint for sure about that zone, the bubble aspect. ⁓
Layna: It gets tight sometimes, but we do our best.
Holly: Yeah, right on. Well, I guess like, let's start with with you and like where you grew up and how you got into surfing.
Layna: Okay, so I have no clue how I got into surfing because I grew up on the Gulf Coast of Florida where there is no waves at all except for hurricanes. luckily it was near Clearwater Beach where I grew up, St. Petersburg, and it's a beach town. So I've always grown up around the ocean. I've always been fascinated by the ocean whether it's surfing, swimming. I really love free diving as well and scuba diving. So the ocean's always been my life. It's always been my solace. And then I remember when I was like, think I must have been like 12 or I had a boogie board on one hurricane and my dad took me out and he's not really a surfer. No one in my family is a surfer actually but it just the feeling of me catching this wave on a boogie board was the best feeling ever. just wanted to keep going more and then, you things like weren't how they are today where there's surf instructors everywhere, schools teaching you how to surf. So I just remember me being with all little grom girlfriends trying to figure out how the ocean works and having the crappiest boards ever. ⁓ ⁓ But then eventually we graduated to a real surfboard and then After I graduated high school I moved to Jacksonville and that's when I really started surfing a little bit more because the main reason of why I wanted to go to college there was because you could surf. So I always had it my brain but I never really grew up in a place where I had consistent waves. Even when I was living in Florida, going through college there, ⁓ you know the waves aren't consistent in Florida but we do get some good ones. It's good when it's good and it's bad when it's bad. So I definitely have the ⁓
Holly: Nice.
Layna: Florida mentality on surfing where it's like I'm grateful for everything. ⁓ And then I eventually went to Nicaragua right when I graduated college, moved all my stuff here and just felt at home. I don't know, there's something about this place that just enamors me. Can't get enough and here I am ten years later making my life here.
Holly: Awesome. Nice. Yeah, I can't remember. Obviously we met and you were working with Surfer the Migos and were you living in Nicaragua already at that time? Like I can't remember how our paths crossed to begin with.
Layna: Yeah. I went back and forth a lot where I was struggling like do I need a real job in society or can I just be this like surfer vagabond and make a life? So I did, I think when you met me I was a little bit more of that like surf gypsy just, I I was just in, I was in Gigante living where I met Carly who introduced me to you guys. And yeah, I think I was doing some sea turtle research as volunteering, taking the Spanish school, just trying to like soak in the culture like okay, how can I have a real life here? Does this make sense? And then, yeah, and then I contacted you guys or vice versa. You guys needed help in Nicaragua and I was like, yeah, I'm here. I'm doing nothing and met you guys and then we just linked up in the north. That was my first experience in the north Nicaragua and it was so fun just being able to surf around like-minded chicas like myself and meet people, travel a little bit more. So that was a really good experience, the season I spent with the Mias. I even went to Costa Rica after, yeah, I went to Playa Grande after. It's been a few seasons there.
Holly: Awesome.
Layna: too. And then COVID killed us for a little bit.
Holly: Right. So, and then I know that you have been doing some like kind of overseas like Indo, I think, or the Maldives travel. And like one of the reasons why I wanted to reach out to you was I saw you posting on Instagram these like horrific story of a gnarly surf accident. And I wanted to, I wanted to get your take on it because it sounds like there's like a lot, a lot to say there. So can you share that story with us?
Layna: Yes, I don't even know where to start. It's a very long story and it's still being written. so yeah, I was with my partner on the time who was a professional longboarder and we had started a kind of longboarding international retreat business. We started it in Nicaragua, Southern Costa Rica and then Puerto Rico as well. So there was a few years we were just traveling around running this business together. It was really really fun just being able to like like he was a professional surfer and I was more of the grounded Wellness yogi. Let's let's come back. Let's what what is the purpose of surfing? Why do we want to be the best that we can be just kind of seeing surfing in a more conscious way? So so we yeah, we made a really good team But He also was competing on the WSL, so was kind of like a lot of moving parts going on. And I had realized that I really wasn't living for myself. I wasn't surfing for myself. Yeah, it was a really big lesson I learned from kind of living this luxurious surf travel life like I've always wanted. And it was beautiful, but yeah, there was moments where I was just like, who am I? What am I doing? Why ⁓ am in this country ⁓ and even like experienced it as I as I should be ⁓ actually kind of
Holly: Well, I'm curious to like say more about that. it sounds like that was like your dream to like travel and surf and then it wasn't all it was cracked up to be. So like what what was the part that wasn't aligned?
Layna: I think, I mean without saying too much detail, I wasn't with the right person, we didn't have the right aligned goals I can share a little bit more after I you the accident, now my mentality in surfing is not catch every wave, be the best surfer, travel to all the destinations. Now my mentality is just enjoy, be present out in the ocean, receive what the ocean gives ⁓ don't take too much, don't be ⁓ Whereas I think a lot of people in the competitive version of it and then a lot of people that would come on our retreats were just ⁓ the mindset, ⁓ like very intense, very selfish, very ego, very greedy,
Holly: so it sounds when you were doing it, ⁓ you were still in it. Like you weren't ⁓ aware ⁓ of this. And it's like through this process that you've built that awareness. Is that, I that
Layna: Absolutely, the dark times teach you what really matters,
Holly: you were you were traveling, you were doing these trips, you were ⁓ hosting people, you were trying to find the balance between like hardcore surf ⁓ and and like, why are we doing this? ⁓
Layna: Yeah, because we all want to get better. We all want to feel comfortable in the water. We all want to feel safe. with that comfortability comes skill, comes knowledge, comes that training. So there is a balance between it all. But ⁓ I think for like my sense of feeling empty with it was more of just... I was forgetting myself in it. was just supporting someone else. was supporting other people around where you can't really give when you are empty, in a way. So, like, yeah, there was times on these retreats where do it, like, no one would show up to yoga and no one would... They would just surf, surf, surf, kill themselves, surf, surf, surf, have a beer after, and then that's it. That's it. And that's fine. That's how some people are. That's okay. Everybody has their own journey. But, yeah, I think I just... to direct my intentions in a different way of what the message and what I really like to share because I mean I'm a yogi, I'm a teacher, I like to connect with people so I really like to share a deep message. Sometimes I can be a little too deep for people but I really love to share kind of what the ocean means to me and how I can find my deepest healing through that. So to wrap that all up, My partner had a contest in Abu Dhabi and I had gone to every single contest, every single contest, just draining myself traveling around the world thinking I want to travel but I'm burnt out, I'm tired, I just want to be at a home. I didn't have a sense of home. So I stayed back at this time and we weren't really doing so well either. So there was a big disconnect between us and then he was begging me, please, please, please meet me in the Maldives, we'll make it better, we'll make it better. My stomach knew it wasn't a great idea. Everything in my body knew that it wasn't the right thing to do. But my little surfer soul adventure self, I couldn't say no to go to the Maldives. Are you serious? Like the waves were perfect. I'd never been there before. There's, you know, advanced reef breaks. I want to get barreled. I want to try my skills. I want to meet new people because that was one of my favorite parts about traveling with my partner and doing these groups is that we got to meet so many people from all around the world in the surf community. Even though everything felt wrong. I still ended up going And ⁓ once I got there it was it was beautiful we connected and we were able to ⁓ Do what I love We're both extroverts talking to everybody meeting people all around the island the island welcomed and blessed ⁓ so beautifully ⁓ and I was I was able to just breathe again, but from the past of kind of this roller coaster of emotions I was experiencing, once I knew when things are good, something might happen where it doesn't become good anymore. So. I think it must have been like the fourth day I was there. it was definitely ⁓ pushing me to another level, which I love. ⁓ And had longboarding primarily for a while. And this time I brought my shortboard. I'm like, okay, I'm going to, you know, do this more performance style. And so the morning it was a little bit smaller and we decided to go to Sultan's and which was a beautiful beautiful break. I got there early before there was a lot of people, we caught so many fun waves, then, yeah, it just got really crowded all of sudden. And I remember there was like a wave on the peak I wanted to go, and then this guy kind of paddled aggressively into me, made me hit my partner, and then we dinged our boards, and it was just kind of this like energy of like, okay, what's going on here? Maybe it's time to go to the boat and just call it a day. So we, I was like, okay, I'm gonna catch
Holly: you
Layna: catch one more wave and then I think I don't know why I felt the need to switch boards with my partner. was like, I want to get the long board just so I can go on the shoulder and get away from these people and just get out of here. And even when I switched boards, I felt something in my stomach just churn, like sitting on the board like this isn't where I'm supposed to be. Kind of that same exact feeling that I kept feeling throughout the years to just like, I'm not in alignment right now. ⁓ So I was really kind of weird and shaky and then I was like, ⁓ okay, there's big wide swinging wave coming. ⁓ Maybe I'll get this one ⁓ and call it a day, get out, go to the boat, go to safety. ⁓ then before that, I remember partner Nevers like be careful with this board, but he was ⁓ going to competition after and was like, hey, this is a really special board, be careful. ⁓ planted a seed in my head of like put the board first for me. So I ended up taking this wave and then I think I like kicked off on the inside a little bit just get out get out of the way. I thought I was in a safe zone but then actually behind that wave was an even bigger wave and so I was on the inside there was people all around me ⁓ of all different levels and then I remember looking at the peak and being like wow why are there three people on that wave coming at me, one person I think ended up kicking off and then I saw the person that was, that had burned someone. So that's the only person I saw. So I naturally am like, okay I'm gonna go to the white water. Usually in a situation like that I would have maybe just thrown the board because I'm like there's too much chaos around me. I need to put myself in a safe situation because I've had surf accidents before where people hit your head, you're in the hospital getting stitches. It's not fun. Nobody, it's never fun. So I had the board in my head. I was thinking of the sharp reef if I would have thrown the board or the people around me that I got hit with my board. So I was like, okay, let me just get control. So I went to the whitewater. But then at that time I saw someone shooting at me directly from the whitewater. And I'm like, ⁓ okay, I can't be here. So then I pivoted the other way. And then at that moment, the surfer from Portugal that I just met, I saw him making a big turn up top at the peak. And I was like, ⁓ cool he's gonna cut back I'm gonna go this way and he won't hit me but for some reason I don't know if he was out of control or he definitely saw me but he decided to turn directly into me and he was actually coming ⁓ for like kind of where my kidneys are in my back and my hip because I was laying on the board ⁓ and this is all the matter of two seconds mind you this calculation that I'm having to figure out ⁓ so at that time I'm like okay I don't even have enough time to dive under and I'm thinking about my head because that was my last surf injury. I'm like I really don't want his fins to hit my head or I don't want him to hit my side and punch through my organs. So... There's actually a photo sequence of the story and that's how I know actually what happened because I didn't really know what happened at all in the moment like you know when you're full adrenaline you're not really thinking you're just acting and that's how a lot of like us surfers are in the when you're in a crowded lineup you don't really have time to think it's just like this natural calculation that you make so Yeah at that time he was coming right at me and I ended up turning my twisting my body to block my body with my leg Which I had no clue what I was doing But that actually saved my life by me doing that unconsciously. So I felt just this really deep impact on the inside of my left leg. It was like right on my calf.
Holly: you
Layna: obviously pain really come right away on an accident like that, so I felt it and I knew it was deep, I knew it was bad. ⁓ And I under for a second and I lifted up and I was like, okay, I'm in the middle of the Indian Ocean, what's gonna happen if I need to go to the hospital right now? ⁓ And I like, okay, I'm gonna just look at my leg, because I couldn't feel it, but I felt like warm, hot, you know, blood, obviously. ⁓ And when picked it up, ⁓ there was I saw flesh, I saw bone. It was the biggest cut I've ever seen on my body. And I couldn't feel it. I couldn't feel anything. I couldn't feel my leg at all. ⁓ And then I looked at the guy who hit me, recognizing who it was. And he so casually just said, ⁓ My bad, are you okay? And I just looked him in the eye. didn't know, Holly, I didn't know I could scream like this before, but it was like this scream that just, it wasn't me, it just came out from like this deepest part of fear on me, and it stopped the entire lineup. just, it shook and that scream still vibrates like within my body. So, so yeah, I just looked him in the screamed, ⁓ and then I saw, ⁓ ⁓ There's more sets coming at me and I was just like my only thought luckily is like fight-or-flight survival Get to the boat, Laina, get to the boat and then we can assess what's going to happen So we're getting rattled by these waves luckily nobody's going on the waves because they saw the drama dramatic scene that was going on there so ⁓ So yeah, once the waves kind of surpassed I still had the longboard so I was paddling very very fast. I was paddling faster than than I ever paddled in my life. And my brain's like wobbling in and out of consciousness. My heart's beating, adrenaline's like running through me. And then this is when I saw something that like I've never seen before in my life. Because I was about to lose consciousness, I believe, just from adrenaline, shock, a lot of blood being lost. ⁓ So when I looked up into the sky, I'll get a little deep and spiritual now, I looked up into the sky and was like, do I just pass out? What do I do? It's like, am I supposed to do right now? Do I fight? Do I surrender? What do I do? like I started to lose vision a little bit. Like I don't know if you guys have ever passed out where it's like in and out, everything's white, then it's black and like you can't hear. So I started to think pass out, but then when I looked up, it was like this pink and purple swirling cloud around me. And it was like it was sunsetting, but it wasn't, it was midday. And I was like, what is that? and it was like I wasn't in my body anymore I connected to this energy whatever that was and I felt it like engulf me and I didn't feel fear at all I didn't feel uncertainty I didn't feel anything I just felt safe and there's no words that really describe what it was but it was just this knowing of you belong here you're safe all you have to do is trust people to help you so let go let go completely you are a fighter, but you're also surrendering to this moment. Get to the boat and all you need to do is trust that everybody's going to be there to help you. And it was one of the most beautiful spiritual messages.
Holly: was there any conscious thought like where what did the self talk go to like, okay, I've gotten run over my legs really messed up. I'm in ⁓ a boat in the middle of nowhere. ⁓
Layna: That was my first thought. How is this journey going to be to get me to the hospital? I'm so far away from everywhere. Am I going to have enough strength to stay conscious during this trip? Am I going to have enough strength to not bleed out? So I didn't know where it hit me. I just saw my leg wide open. I didn't know if it was an artery, if it was a muscle, if the bone was broken. I had no clue what it was. I just knew it was bad. So my first thought was like, don't lose all this blood because you're going to pass out. So yeah, I was just thinking more of like, get to the boat and take it step by step because I have no clue what to do.
Holly: And your partner, had he realized that you were in this situation?
Layna: Yeah, so he was actually screaming at the guy that hit me and in my head I was just like, no, just come help me please. ⁓ But I was actually paddling so fast that nobody could catch up with me. It was crazy. Like I heard this, like I couldn't hear a lot. I couldn't really comprehend a lot ever since that cloud spoke to me. ⁓ So I heard him kind of screaming. I heard his voice. And then I also heard ⁓ our friend who we met prior, his name was Joaquin. beautiful man from Uruguay who helped me a lot. I heard him just screaming, paddle Lena, paddle, paddle, paddle. So, and I could feel how far away they were from me. ⁓ So that kind of like that voice brought me back into the present moment when I heard him scream. So I was almost halfway to the boat by then. ⁓ And then we had ⁓ another friend that we had met, Amber, ⁓ who was closer to the boat. So she actually got there before me. And then the moment I was probably like feet away from the boat, I felt this big push behind me and that was my partner. It finally cut out to me and was like, I will help you get into the boat, kind of. I had, after I had that little vision, it kind of told me to disconnect your brain from your body. Don't be in your pain body right now. It doesn't exist. Like you just have to fight right now. So I kind of was numb. I didn't really know how to move at that point, but I could feel my upper body. So it was the last moment I knew that I needed to put a little bit of exertion on my leg. So I took myself off the board into the water so I could pull myself up on the boat and I just I felt someone lift me I don't know who was touching me at this point but I felt someone kind of lurch me up and then Amber was on the boat and kind of helped pulled me up and then at that moment I finally like felt like okay I'm out of the ocean right now I know that I'm in a little bit more safety than I was before and then I listened to that little voice it was just turn your brain off go inward and focus on your breath and everybody else will take care of you. So I just put my hand on my face because I didn't want my eyes to trick me anymore with the colors or passing out. It was too much, it was overwhelming, the amount of sensories. So I put my hand on my face and I just laid there and I felt people come onto the boat. There was probably like eight people coming onto the boat. Everybody was nervous. Everybody was freaking out. What do we do? What do we do? And luckily Amber's husband was like a super, super boy scout and knew how to handle trauma. And so I think just out of respect, they ⁓ were like, hey, Tony, can you put the tourniquet on her? So we took a surfboard leash and ⁓ a rash guard and he put it around my leg. But I think it just, he was very nervous, didn't know what to do exactly in that situation. So they put it on wrong. Actually, they put it on like, on top of the cut and then that was the first time that I remembered pain. So I was like I was in this really tranquil peaceful place like yes everybody's gonna help me and then all of sudden it was like electricity back in my body. ⁓ my god I'm here this is reality this is raw this is happening and my body was like trembling and shaking and then I was just like okay breathe let that wave of emotion pass come back let go let go.
Holly: Thanks for watching.
Layna: And then I felt something really, really tight on the top of my knee. And then it just like, all the sensation stopped. So then at that moment I knew that it was applied properly. Because I couldn't feel a thing after that I felt you know really really tight squeezing But it was crazy that pressure that you put on my body was like calmed me And I guess that's what you're supposed to do when you apply a tourniquet is just like take control because My body was like seizing and shaking so I would have yeah, could have like hurt myself Just if it was applied wrong again So once it was applied I I heard the boat captain he went full force. There's like boards flying everywhere People are jumping around everywhere holding me down. My body is like flying. He's going so so fast to get to the island and at that moment I knew we were going it was this little clinic on Himafushi. They also that same kind of Omen like ominous deja vu every time I passed it I would walk to get coffee and I would look at it like Creepy like it was just like a dark ominous vibe and I knew and this was like days before
Holly: You're like, damn it, I'm going to that spot.
Layna: I knew exactly where I was going. So yeah, we eventually made it back to the dock, which was so slippery, so unstable, just everything that could go wrong at all. I'm like, OK, how am I even going to get off this boat right now? I have no clue. And I opened my eyes at one point just to kind of like see if I still had vision. And I saw I saw the guy who hit me. And it like brought me to this dark space and I just had to go back. And I started kind of trembling again. And then I saw And he was like praying, was like begging, like, I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry. And I even felt bad for him at that moment actually, because I was like, wow, the reverse situation, if that was me that hit someone, I would actually feel a hundred times worse than how I feel right now, which is crazy to think about that. ⁓ So I guess they brought a backboard down to the boat and I just felt kind of like remembering surrender surrender surrender so I felt them lift me onto the backboard and The boat was rocking everything was so unstable and I'm like I could freak out at this moment I could freak out and just Completely lose it but then I was like no trust trust trust they got you they got you so instead I just engaged my core and was like I'm stable, I'm stable and the moment I felt us like touch the land, that was the next stage of I'm even safer than I was before. So then I opened my eyes and I saw like I was embarrassed because I saw just this little chaos that I was causing on this peaceful little island. I saw the locals that were kind of, you know, linking up with me before that we made a connection with and I just I went inward. was like, ⁓ God, I'm causing all this chaos. can't like why am I thinking that at that
Holly: you you
Layna: moment you know it's just there was so many waves of emotions that were passing through me and then I got to the ambulance and I'd never been in an ambulance before and I was already I was having like more anxiety attacks like when I'm in an ambulance in the middle of nowhere like I can just thinking about my parents I'm like I can't even imagine if they knew what was happening to me right now it's like 3 a.m. while they're where they're at I don't remember much of that travel but I remember I my partner leaving to go get my passport and get money so we could go to the hospital and do the surgery. But I remember him leaving and me feeling so like, I'm alone, I'm alone, I'm alone. Why would he leave me? Just kind ⁓ of triggered. But then there was the most important thing, which also happened on the boat, was someone was always holding my hand. And I could feel just like the pulse of someone else's heartbeat reminding me that I wasn't gonna fade away, like that I wasn't going to pass out. I wasn't gonna lose consciousness. So it was really beautiful how every single one of them knew, like don't let go of Lena's hand. And they were passing off my hand and I feeling different energies. So once I got into the clinic, I could. I remember hearing just like my vitals, I could hear my own heartbeat and I opened my eyes a little bit and then that was the first time I spoke. was like, this was probably been an hour since the accident now. And I just said, am I going to be okay? And the nurse, she was so beautiful. She had this like red sarong on her head and a golden nose ring and the sunlight was shining in. And she was like, of course you're going to be okay. You're in a safe place. that just, it warmed me and I went back into this little beautiful space that I was in for a while but then they ended up taking off the tourniquet and then that's when I felt everything again and they ended up cleaning it a little bit and yeah I just I kind of blacked out at that moment because it was just so much sensation and I heard the I heard the nurse and then the owner of the hotel kind of like not arguing but very stressfully speaking of like when's the ferry coming we need to get it's not soon enough like what hospital is she gonna go to so even
Holly: Thank
Layna: Even though it was stressful and was uncertain, I knew that they were taking the best care of me that anybody possibly could and I was going to be okay. So eventually I left that clinic, back into the ambulance, Yeah, they eventually loaded me onto the ferry. It's a public ferry, leaves every hour. I'm my bikini soaking wet, I'm in my rash guard and as you know the culture in the Maldives, like you're supposed to be covered up. ⁓ So it really like uncomfortable for a lot of people. ⁓ So yeah, ⁓ I don't know why I couldn't take my rash guard off. I was just freezing. I couldn't think of anything. Yeah, and then also like, where am I going? How's the surgery going? Because the accident itself wasn't even the traumatic part. It was just the journey to repair my leg was actually what was the most traumatic. So yeah, so we went to the boat, ferry, loads of people. I remember there was this man, very loud man that was like sitting at my feet. Luckily, I had Joaquin and Tony there with me. Joaquin came. It was really sweet. He didn't even know us and just wanted to come help me. So they were like both kind of holding me as I'm like,
Holly: Yeah.
Layna: shaking and my waves of emotions were just kind of more fear before that but then it started to change because I don't know, I just in a different setting and my consciousness was coming back a little bit. I was able to speak again. the guy at my feet was like yelling, like yelling at them, this is what you need to do, this is what you need to do, this. And it like, gave me so much anxiety. And I know he was just trying to help. And at that time I opened my eyes and I like just to look at who it was. And then I saw all the blood on my leg. then ⁓ I saw that blood I kind of like got really really dizzy and just laid back down and started to cry. Yeah, but it's...
Holly: And isn't it all like wrapped up, but you're just bleeding?
Layna: bleeding a lot. later I found out it was just like an inch below the artery. So it wasn't fatal of like spewing blood everywhere, but there was a lot of blood, blood bleed lost. So yeah, it was like, I felt, I just saw like the crimson color all over my leg, the blood all over the, all over the fairy seat.
Holly: Yeah, you're like having the realization of like, I'm really hurt right now.
Layna: So then once I kind of dropped into that space of not fear, but more of I'm safe, I'm protected, I just had this huge clarity of like how can I share this story to change the global etiquette of surfing? How can I share my story to bring more compassion into the lineup and not this greedy, egotistical, every wave is mine, I'm the best surfer in the lineup, I deserve all the best waves. It's just like...
Holly: But do you think that that was what was happening in your situation?
Layna: I think a lot of it was due to overcrowded aggression and also just people not being at the right way for their level. Which is also, there's a lot of things, I think, that have become in the evolution of surfing where it's just so easily accessible for people and some people don't realize how dangerous certain things could be. So I think that like my biggest thing that I thought was bad about the situation was that This person should have pulled off the wave when they saw how much chaos was going on You know how easy it is just to kick off the back of the wave But this person decided to cut back directly into me just to not lose a section as he burned someone and I don't want to point blame on anybody because there's accidents that happen, but I do know that There's a lot of ways to prevent these accidents from happening and I see it all the time in the town I live in from surfing all over the world just really really close calls that people think are just casual I'm like no that's life or death right there just for you to make that section ⁓ And I know just from surfing like surfing with the Amigas surfing with my personal girlfriends I have here. It's like we don't do that in the water. We're friendly We share ways we call people into waves like I feel more stoked watching my friends catch a wave and if I want to like get all the greediness of the wave myself so yeah, it was more of like how can we share to make This global etiquette a little bit more out of compassion than more out of like selfish surfing. ⁓ And just having the proper education, having the proper wisdom to be in a certain level. And I'm not saying like people's children belong at a certain break. It's more of like find the break that's the best for your level there. If you're not
Holly: I just want to say that's gnarly. super what you experience and ⁓ I ⁓ totally get why you would be ⁓ to ⁓ and deserving to cry and those real emotions and also, ⁓ like, you're so lucky that it could have been You like you said, they could have your ⁓ kidneys or ⁓ actually hit an artery. So, like, it is ⁓ like, ⁓ you're lucky. And it sounded like you, you know, you had some like really great inner strength and were able to have those spiritual component and all that to get you through it. like thinking about what could have done differently, like it is so hard, especially when you're talking about the Maldives, because like I know like, serve with me, as we did two years of retreats in the Maldives and like, know like Ed Normal at our other locations all around the world. We break people up into groups by ability level and like take them to different spots. But I know that logistically it's hard in the Maldives because you've just got the one boat and you've got the one, you what do they call it? The Donnie, like the little boat, you know? And they just, take everybody from that boat to the same spot. And so you might have like vastly different ability levels. And it's at that point, it's not actually the people's fault.
Layna: Mm-hmm. Yeah. It's a boat, sir. No.
Holly: Because they don't actually know any better. And in fact, in some of the Amiga retreats, they would have preferred to go to a different spot. But just the way that the logistics are, you just can't do it.
Layna: Yes. Yeah, and that's what a lot of the knowledge that I want to share and that what I've actively been taking action on here is like, okay, these people that are in charge of those groups, take accountability or just don't like, it's not about catching every single wave, it's about teaching people the proper safety, teaching them the proper, what's your intention about surfing? so yeah it's like taking accountability for ⁓ people that you're in charge of in the ocean and also what's your influence ⁓ that's not even if you are a ⁓ instructor but also just being a surfer a top surfer out there how are you influencing others And how can you be a greater influence when you're in the water instead of just being selfish?
Holly: ⁓ I agree with you Like anybody that's listened to my take on etiquette knows that like ⁓ you're preaching to the choir here. ⁓ But I do also ⁓ that it is hard people like it again, like using Maldives is a specific example or even Nicaragua. ⁓ It looks like people this is their one week vacation that they have waited eight months or a year or more than they've saved up for. ⁓
Layna: Yeah. I'm hungry.
Holly: And maybe the waves haven't been good for the first four days. And now finally there's good waves. every, it's a really hard argument to make, especially for you and I, the types that we live in. mean, maybe not where I live right at this moment, but we surf good waves relatively a lot. You know, we're not in landlocked wherever New York city or San Francisco or somewhere where the waves aren't that good that often. And we haven't spent, you know,
Layna: Mm-hmm. Yeah. Yeah.
Holly: Thousands and thousands of dollars and taking time away from work and family to go this one dream trip on the dream day Like it's it's really hard to convince people who are out there That they should like chill out and not catch so many weights or kick out of a wave that they've waited two hours for Because there's like five people paddling on the inside, you know, like it is a really hard argument to make
Layna: So I mean, after like a lot of just, I don't know, guess, contemplation on it, I mean, one of the solutions I think that I try is like, the people who are in charge of those people, I try to have them be like the people that have the local respect in the lineup, it also comes with like taking the time to look at this well, look at the report. ⁓ maybe there is spot that this is gonna be great where it's gonna be empty, where there's not gonna be as many people or ⁓ a place where there's not gonna be loads of beginners in front of you that you have to navigate if you don't the control to navigate ⁓ in front of. So ⁓ yeah, it's just about like trying to, ⁓ I think, take the time, ⁓ put in the to plan ⁓ and that balance of safety and stoke because ⁓ but ⁓
Holly: I hear you and as one of those people myself that is in that position and also has those values ⁓ that, ⁓ know, 100%. of course. it's not good for anyone to take clients out into crowded waves. The clients ⁓ are frustrated, the ⁓ local whether they be or actual people who are born in the place that you are, like they're not happy. Nobody's, it's not good for anyone, but. ⁓ Sometimes it just is what it is based on the tide or the swell or the wind or the situation that day or Somebody comes to you and they say hey my dream is to serve salt and I came on this trip to serve salt and you know they're capable of surfing sultans, but Sultans is firing and everybody is out. You know, it's like
Layna: maybe let's not go there. ⁓
Holly: But how? This person has paid you $5,000 for a week and that's what they say. I came because I want to sultans and the waves are firing. It's a really tough, and who am I to say you can't serve sultans? You're not good enough or whatever. We do sometimes, believe me, we will sometimes tell people, we're not going to go there. It's not a good idea.
Layna: I know. you Yeah. Yeah. Right. Yeah, yeah. It's a controversial topic. ⁓ It really is ⁓ especially with just like the way the ⁓ is kind of growing in a lot of these areas where a lot of, yeah, they're just not used to it. It's not just, yeah.
Holly: One, there's that argument. Like, again, I feel like I'm on the opposite side of this argument than I normally am. I'm normally arguing your side, so I'm just gonna, like, sit in the other chair to, have the discussion. Because I wanna say again, like, I get it. I agree with you. I'm definitely, like, on your side. But I also know that there are problems because these people are adults and the ocean is for everyone. Right? So, like, it's one thing, I think, if people are,
Layna: Ocean is for everyone.
Holly: beginners, know, like if you are, if you don't know how to turn a roll, then you shouldn't be surfing at Sultan's like, for example, like that's easy. It's easy to do that. Hey, for your safety and the safety of everyone else in the water, like, I'm sorry, I can't let you go out there. Like that's easy. But the question is when it's like, you know, this person that you're talking about that ran you over and you, both of you are competent surfers. Like neither one of you don't have the skills to be out there, you know, and probably the guy that the whatever his name is dropped in on.
Layna: Yeah. Okay. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. ⁓ huh.
Holly: that person was probably a competent surfer. And I bet that at least one of the other people around you paddling out, all of y'all probably would have been totally fine skill-wise surfing that break. And yet the accident happened. And that's where I feel like it gets tricky. Like who gets to decide who's allowed to surf there and who's not? Like, it just, yeah, go ahead.
Layna: Mm-hmm. ⁓ Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. So I think overall is just like more awareness and more compassion through all aspects. The coaches, the instructors, the surfers, the local, everybody. Just awareness, compassion. I think that's what's gonna be the best. But as we're saying with the froth meter, that's hard to think about that. And even like, know you're a frother, I'm a frother. Like of course we forget about that sometimes. just, you when you're on a wave you feel the
Holly: Yeah.
Layna: electricity and you're just like I'm going I see my line I don't care who I scare in the way sometimes that happens it's it's it's it's a human thing that we have but
Holly: And like you said in your situation, like it also happens so fast where, you know, like I have, I serve crowd waves and like, I am one of the ones like you're talking about. not kicking out. mean, eventually, yeah, if I actually think I'm gonna hit them, I will kick out. But like lots and lots of time I see them and their panics. I'm going to hit them. And I'm like, dude, chill. I'm not going to hit you. I'm in control. I'm to go right around, you know?
Layna: Two seconds. Yeah. And then that's the problem is, yeah, it's the panicking. So... That's another part of what I wanted to share too is my journey back into the ocean. Because it didn't stop after this. was ⁓ like what you said, the panicking, it only makes it worse. Kind like when you're driving a car and you're like, do I merge? Do I merge? And if you hesitate, it makes it so much more dangerous when you hesitate instead of having that kind of confidence with it. ⁓ know if you want me to share the rest of the hospital journey. ⁓
Holly: Sure. What did you end up doing?
Layna: All of sudden, I just find myself in literally the back of a truck, back of a pickup truck, ⁓ with ⁓ Tony and Joaquin there. And I was like laughing at this I'm because I'm like, I'm in the of a pickup truck ⁓ in the bell leaves. My leg's wide open. I have no clue if it's broken. And then that's when reality hit a little bit and Tony looked at me and he goes, we're in the hospital. And then that's when reality hit a little bit and Tony looked at me and he goes, we're in the hospital. to get your surgery. And that's when I went so inward. Because I'm like, wait, I have to go get a surgery now? After all I've just been through, I'm so weak. I have nothing left in me. I have to go get stabbed and prodded and see if I'm going to be OK now? So yeah, without getting into too much detail of it, it was very intense. It was very, very gnarly, just the whole process of it, just getting transferred from room to room. After all I've just been through, I'm so weak. ⁓ it was very intense. It was very, very gnarly, just the whole process of it, Not being in a different culture not understanding the language not understanding what was going on half the time like I felt like a test subject almost like getting poked and prodded Not being in a different culture not understanding the language not understanding what was going on half the time like I felt like a test subject almost like getting poked and prodded I was getting edgy and frustrated at that point. I was getting edgy and frustrated at that point. ⁓ So ⁓ yeah, eventually I think I ended up, they ended up giving me this pain medication after all of that. I was like, wow. ⁓
Holly: Shh!
Layna: I can relax now a little bit. And the guy was so sweet. He's like, just relax. This will make your nerves go away. So then they transported me to another room. And that's when I kind of freaked out because they're like, OK, the surgeon will be ready in six hours. And I'm like, what am I supposed to do? Lay here for six hours and wait? Can't drink anything, can't eat anything, can't do anything. I'm freezing cold still in my wet bikini and just with a towel over me. And I no phone service. I had nothing.
Holly: Yes. Oof.
Layna: I couldn't have anything to distract my brain at that moment, except for like the little drip of the IV. And I think I actually was alone at that point because everybody who was helping me had went to get lunch because they need to eat, they need to take care of themselves too. And then I tried to listen to this podcast of like, when you're ready to heal, that was the time. So I started listening to it to just try to like take my brain off. And it brought me into this dark spiral. And then I started hyperventilating. I started crying. Like I was having an anxiety attack, my first anxiety attack I've ever.
Holly: What?
Layna: had and because I was alone completely and I guess it was only 10 minutes according to my partner at the time but it felt like ages it felt like hours and then once he finally came back then that's when he finally let me cry and I cried a lot but it was like a it was like a release cry as me thinking about okay I'm not gonna be able to surf I'm not gonna be able to ride horses I'm not gonna be able to freed I'm not gonna be able to be myself for even longer now and it came back to that omen of like I wasn't actually living for myself prior either. ⁓ I can't do yoga. I can't do anything for like months. I'm just thinking about my healing process. So it's like I'm not even present. I'm just thinking about the future. I'm thinking about I'm begging the nurse like please give me gas like put me out. I'm tired of fighting for my consciousness. Like I just want to be out right now and and then the eventually time passed and it was time for the surgery and that they like tricked me from separating from my partner because I kind of knew that I was anxious and like they just brought me into this room and that I never saw him until before the surgery so I was like wow like I'm completely alone right now on this journey I'm 100 % alone And yeah, so by the time I finally got into the surgical room, like no one has shoes on, they're all barefoot. It's like crazy. I'm like, I'm about to get surgery. No one even has shoes on because they all, you know, their religion. ⁓ So I kind of laughed at that point. I'm like, wow, this is me right now. Like, I'm just going to surrender. This is almost funny. ⁓ yeah, guess it's like once the moment that you actually have to act is the moment that you become the bravest. I guess it's like once the moment that you actually have to act is the moment that you become the bravest. So once he asked me to stand up to put the needle in my I'm just like, alright, this is it, this is the end. If I never feel my leg again, whatever, here we go. I'm in full surrender and at least I'm here in a safe place. yeah, he gave me the epidural. It was horrible. I don't know if you've had one before. It's not that fun. But then after it went through, I had like a little bit of sedative that he gave me. So I kind of was like in and out of consciousness. And before I knew it, it was done. I see the anesthesiologist.
Holly: else.
Layna: like so like, oh it's beautiful like and I'm like how many stitches are there and he's like I don't know more than a hundred and I'm just like what like why are y'all laughing about this right now like this is crazy so so yeah and then eventually I finished and I remember being in the waiting room like I couldn't feel anything I couldn't even move my face I couldn't move anything my entire body was numb I felt like the toxic antibiotics everything just pumping through my veins because I'm usually like a natural person I don't even take Advil when I have a headache, so I'm just like wow there's poison pumping through me right now, but it's poison that's saving me right now And I know I need this poison so it was yeah It was pretty pretty intense like my back hurts so so bad so laying there for almost eight hours And I couldn't move I couldn't roll to the side that were like yelling at me like stop trying to move like They're like you can't you can't move your head or else you're gonna have a headache from this ⁓ so yeah, I eventually In a short story long stayed in the hospital for three more nights And ⁓ but what really kept me through was that after I got out of the surgery I saw that my partner had made a post about it and I looked at my messages and there was like the most messages I've ever received on my phone there was so much love like pouring into me just from like a little tiny notice of like haste and lane of some love and I Got some of the most beautiful messages I've ever received in my life and it It was just such a pure, it gave me hope for the surf community. So yeah, we ended up having a GoFundMe on there, raised enough money to get me into a first class ticket so I could fly the way home. But there was ⁓ the first night I stayed in the hospital, I had one of the most insane attacks I've ever had. ⁓ It just like, ⁓ I don't know. woke up in the middle of the night not remembering how to breathe. And I think it was my nervous system, just like after going through so much of that adrenaline, my nervous system coming back. And it was triggered by someone screaming next to me in the hospital, because there's thin walls, there's not a lot of privacy. And it was like someone screaming in the middle of the night. And then I just woke me up. I couldn't breathe. I couldn't focus. I couldn't do anything. And unfortunately, those anxiety attacks continued for at least a month after the whole process. then just fast-forwarding went back to my parents house and they helped me heal they were so so sweet ⁓ they have a really slow space their pace very you know retired and just ⁓ loving so it was the best place I could have ever landed ⁓ you know ⁓ just physically but also also like me emotionally healing from just my kind of next chapter in life, like me purging out what wasn't serving me and then back to a place, back to my roots and the house I grew up in, just remembering myself essentially, relearning how to walk in the same grass I learned how to walk when I was a baby. was a very beautiful experience. ⁓ And then eventually ⁓ we had group plant in Nicaragua actually and that was my goal. I was like, I'm going to walk so I can make it to this retreat in Nicaragua. And I actually ended up learning how to re-walk for in like three weeks I think. It was so fast. Nobody could believe it. The physical therapist, nobody could believe it. And luckily, like thank you so much for everybody who supported me. I was able to like get through my medical bills, get through everything from the GoFundMe and just the love from the surf community. My first time back into the was so, so emotional. And I was on the same board I was on. I remember putting my feet on the board and just feeling the anxiety, but also feeling like you're back home. ⁓ You're back home. I'll never forget that journey back into the ocean. And then fast forwarding, I stayed in Nicaragua a little bit longer just so I could heal. ⁓ And I got my first wave again. I started walking on the beach. I started running. That's when I met my current business partner here, Derek, where he offered training in the sauna, do your physical therapy in the sauna with me. Like, let's get back, let's get back. So it was like I found my home, essentially. I found my crew of like, support when I felt all alone a little bit. yeah, I remember being with my friend, a super powerful badass surfer who I caught my first wave. It was at Colorado, so it was just this perfect size. Sun was out. The water was blue. All my girlfriends around cheering me on. And yeah, I just remember that electric feeling of just... Writing that wave of like remembering like okay, because I would I didn't know after that I remember telling my dad right after the accident happened I'm never gonna surf again. I don't want any more accidents like this, so it just this big fear overcame And I think that's actually when I wrote you, because I was searching, how do I overcome this trauma and get back into the water? And I saw one of your blogs, and I wrote you, and you just said, hey, just write me an email. And then I ended up writing this whole entire story that I sent to you a year later. And here we all four circles.
Holly: I do.
Layna: So even just like that little, yeah, just write me an email. It made ⁓ write this amazing, healing story that now I'm working to publish.
Holly: Did you find it helpful to get it out of you and onto the page?
Layna: It was really hard, and it took me a long time to write it. ⁓ It's basically me reliving everything and putting it into detail. And yeah, I'll share it once it's published. It goes into really, really deep detail of just the raw emotions that I was feeling and just the deepest amount of pain. But I remember someone writing me like, Only in the deepest moments of fear is when you can progress to your highest level. So it's like we need to have those moments in order to catapult to the next level of what you're doing, whether that's through surfing or energetically holding the space of whatever your goal is here. Only in the deepest moments of fear is when you can progress to your highest level. So it's like we need to have those moments in order to catapult to the next level of what you're doing, whether that's through surfing or energetically holding the space of whatever your goal is here. ⁓
Holly: Well, yeah, and you mentioned that through going through this experience, made you realize that you weren't living for yourself. So what, what changes did you make or how did you, how have you changed since then?
Layna: That's a good question. So I have a lot more, I guess, patience, awareness, and gratitude every time I'm in the ocean. So just me. being able to have the ability to touch the ocean every day was just as beautiful as writing a big massive barrel that I was trying to get. So me going back into the ocean with this more heightened awareness of gratitude for each moment, ⁓ I don't have to catch all the waves that come to I don't have to froth out all day every day thinking I need to be in the ocean, surfing the waves. there was so many times, ⁓ so I came to ⁓ here and was Pongas in the off season because there's nobody out. I didn't want to be around a crowd at all. ⁓ So ⁓ it ⁓ me ⁓ connection to ocean, which in an extension ⁓ is my connection myself. ⁓ So I was to be with myself alone. So I ended up, you know, splitting with my partner because ⁓ our lives just weren't working together, I ended up putting more energy and work into myself rather, into my strength, my surfing, but also what am I doing with my life? ⁓ And it brought me to the best possible place that I could ever be in my life. I feel like the strongest, highest version of myself. So basically that accident purged out what, I wasn't listening to myself and I knew I wasn't listening to myself. So it like purged that away in a really, really dark way and brought me this light. ⁓ where I was able to rebuild my foundation, where now I am here in Nicaragua hosting this space for surfers with a deeper consciousness, people who want to come heal. ⁓ I've also started a thing with one of my best friends here called the Mariposa Wave Club where we're teaching little girls how to be confident in the water, but not only how to be confident, but also how to be compassionate, how to connect, how to find a deeper meaning from it and not be intimidated from all these guy rippers out here because the younger boys are rippers and the little girls are kind of intimidated. So yeah, it brought me to just know that I do have the power ⁓ to a change ⁓ in the water and I can't it alone. It's with the tribe that you have and it's not about girls and guys, about ⁓ everybody coming as one. ⁓ So. Yeah, it brought me to a lot of realizations where now I can truly live for myself and truly enjoy every moment as the ocean is a healing solace for us all. That's what you preach and that's what these podcasts are about. It's just how can we find their deepest meaning through all of our experiences through surfing. Or just being me.
Holly: Awesome. Epic. Well, thank you so much for all that you're doing in Southern Nicaragua and for sharing your story with us. And I know it was hard to live through, so I appreciate you going there. ⁓ I think it's a lot of people's, like, worst fear to experience that. So it's really inspiring to hear about how you were able to get through it and turn it into a positive. So I appreciate you. I appreciate you. and thank you for sharing with us.
Layna: course, thank you for having the space and having the outlet to share because that's the hardest part is getting it out there. can write it, we can talk about it, but how do we reach this to the people who actually are going to take it in and use it for good. So thank you for all you do with the female empowerment and just surfing empowerment in the world. You're an inspiration for me.
Holly: Awesome, thank you.
