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Hello, bienvenido.
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A powerful stuff where today we are gonna get a little witchy with it.
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It is mid-October.
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Halloween is just around the corner, so I thought, what better time to discuss the elusive, the saboteur, the sexy.
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We love to hate them.
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We hate to love them.
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Our shadow.
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Our shadow.
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And you might be like, Meredith, what is your shadow?
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Right?
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And we're not talking about the literal one we see at high noon when we're walking on the street.
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Though there are definitely metaphors to draw with that.
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We are talking about that side of ourself that sabotages us right when we are in the brink of a success.
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Or maybe it's like those sneaky nights where we end up doom scrolling or comparing ourselves to others.
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And then we say, Why did I do that?
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That's so annoying, right?
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That self-loathing, like the Grinch when he's sitting atop his mountain, just like loathing in his self-patred.
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And the thing is, our shadow is a little misunderstood.
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So in this video, you are gonna learn what is your shadow?
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Why does it matter?
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How can you actually learn to bridge the dark, the light, to love your shadow so you can actually harness it so you can get to where you want to go?
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And that way we can have our Halloween with more tricks or more treats, less tricks, and isn't that powerful stuff?
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So I like to describe our shadow as like that crazy friend that we all had in college.
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We all love them.
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And they go out, they have a wild night at the club, we pick them up, we tuck them in bed, we get them some electrolytes, we're like, she is crazy, but I love her.
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And you wake up the next morning and you hear all of her insane stories, and you don't shame her, you're just like, you know what?
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She's crazy, I wouldn't do that, but I love her.
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And that's kind of like our shadow, right?
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It's like that part of us that kind of acts out.
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And when we can have this like loving levity, this cheeky, adoring energy toward our shadow, that's actually when it will loosen its grip over us.
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What happens when we don't give our shadow the love?
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So I guess I started off by telling you guys, you know, the way we could love our shadow.
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But how it usually happens with our shadow is a most people don't even realize that their shadow is separate than them or that their shadow is even running rampant in the background.
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But as the psychologist Carl Jung says, until we make the subconscious conscious, it will rule our lives and we will call it fate.
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So we are calling forth our shadow.
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And our shadow is this part of us that is scared of change.
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They are scared of growth.
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And so they do things and they say things to us that feel so true.
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They feel so factual in the moment because they are trying to keep us at a lower level because they are scared of what will happen if we expand, if we are seen.
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So that's why we keep being like, why did I say that?
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Why do I keep going for emotionally unavailable men?
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Why do I keep scrolling on Instagram when I know it makes me feel worse about myself?
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It's like our shadow distracting us from, you know, the Instagram example of uh of actually doing the thing where we are going to take the big swing, where we are gonna be seen, the emotionally unavailable man example.
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Well, then it protects us from actually putting ourselves in front of someone who we might actually like really be seen by.
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And thus, how vulnerable would that be to actually be unconditionally loved by someone?
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How terrifying that's not what we're used to.
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So our shadow, bless their heart, I think they are protecting us.
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And so what we can do, the first step is just to acknowledge their existence, right?
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Because if we try to sweep our shadow under the rug, or if you think about you see parents ignoring their kids having a temper tantrum, what do the kids do?
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They yell louder because they are like, I am not shutting up till I'm getting your attention.
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So the first step with our shadow, when you notice it is A, just noticing it.
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What is it doing in your life?
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What are the things that it's doing that that is kind of wrecking havoc in your life?
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Just writing them down, loving examples.
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I'll give you guys a few of mine because we are in this together.
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Definitely guilty as charged, the scrolling, the comparing.
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I'm like, even as a healed life coach, no, we are never healed.
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We are always healing, right?
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And when I notice that I'm not giving myself the acknowledgement that I need, that is when I reach for the junk food, which is like the low-hanging shadow food, if you will.
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And yeah, I scroll, I compare.
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Because then again, it distracts from the big swings that I actually want to be taking, like making this YouTube video for you guys.
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And what it used to be when I first was getting in the self-development world, I noticed it was my pattern dating emotionally unavailable men.
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I'd always choose these guys.
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Like somebody call them fuckboys.
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No, I'm just, you know, I'm sure they're all lovely men with we all make mistakes.
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Anyways, I wasn't perfect.
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I was choosing men that were not emotionally available and nor giving me any indication that they were.
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And even though I'm a gluten-free celiac, you know, I was going for the bread crumbing.
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I was living for those texts that were inconsistent where they would ghost me and then gaslight ghost and then gaslight, and part of me loved it.
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You know, it's like almost if a guy was too available or too nice, I'd be like, wait, something's off.
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Like, why is he too available?
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Why is he too nice?
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And so I ended up going for these guys where it felt like a prize that I was getting, right?
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Like I really like was maneuvering a chess game, responding exactly the in the amount of like time that had lapsed with the exact right cheeky response, not giving away too much emotional vulnerability to keep the game going, where then we mate, you know, meet up once every other full moon or whatever it might be.
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I can't tell you how many like times this pattern repeated itself.
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And when I was reading the book Existential Kink by Carolyn Elliott, she talks about we do these things because like some part of us likes it.
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And your intellectual self is like, wait, hold up.
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Why would I like this?
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I this is the opposite of what I want.
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I want true love.
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I want marriage.
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But then it's like, okay, but why do you keep choosing these types of relationships?
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You are a person in full agency.
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You can take full ownership of whether you keep engaging versus always venting to your friends, why me?
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Why am I the victim here?
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And then you keep choosing another guy just like that.
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And then you have friends being like, oh my gosh, here she goes again, right?
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We've all been there.
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That was me.
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That was me during this self-healing journey with these emotionally unavailable guys.
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So then I looked at Meredith the shadow, and I was like, some part of me just loved it.
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I loved some part of me, my shadow part, right?
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First, I acknowledge what she was doing.
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She was going for the emotionally unavailable men.
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Then I noticed like what she was saying, like to me internally.
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And sometimes these things that they're saying to us can be quite bitchy, right?
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But I wrote them down without any judgment.
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And, you know, it was like she was saying, like, you're so lucky to be um dating this guy, or he's like so hot.
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Are you sure you can do better?
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But you're this, but you're that, right?
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Like really mean things we would never say to a friend.
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Um, and it was because some part of me believed that I was not enough.
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So then guess what?
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These guys that I kept choosing got to help me fulfill that belief that I was not enough because I would go after them, we would date, they would pull away, I would try harder, they would get freaked out by that, disappear, help reinforce I am not enough.
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So it played perfectly into my shadow's evil plan of how I could perpetuate this cycle.
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And by perpetuating that cycle, my shadow thought she was protecting me from, again, actual unconditional love, where, God forbid, what if I was enough?
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What would that mean?
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Not just with dating and finding the love of my life, but I can't tell you how many thousands of hours I was distracted by these guys that I was chasing, that I could be working on some of my creative projects that were nearest and dearest to my heart, that were like the long firm, long-term doling, right?
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That I never took the time to actually sit down and push those things across the finish line because I was too busy analyzing these endless, like mind fuck cycles with these low hanging relationships.
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So first step, I acknowledged it.
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I acknowledged what my shadow was doing.
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Second step, I wrote down what she was saying.
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And then third step, I noticed what she was trying to protect me from, right?
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What was she scared of?
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And this is where we want to start to think of our shadow as just a scared inner child, right?
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She's like frozen in time from this time or place in our youth and our adolescence, where we learned that this would somehow keep us safe, right?
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By um not being fully emotional available with somebody that would somehow keep me safe, right?
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So I was trying to rep, like that was my misguided um inner child interpretation of that at some point in time.
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And so I had to acknowledge where that came from, where that belief came from.
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And then I had to sit my shadow down, like she was a little seven-year-old Meredith, and say, like, what are you afraid of?
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What are you afraid will happen if we actually like, you know, go after someone who equally wants to go after us, who's equally available?
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What do you fear will happen?
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And what do you need from me to trust you that I've got you in this gray area, right?
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They're used to existing in the black or white area in the extremes.
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That's why they keep perpetuating these things we say we want to avoid.
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So if we're trying to break out of that cycle, what does our shadow need from us to feel seen, to feel heard, to feel acknowledged?
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Maybe Little Meredith needed to hear, I love you.
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I'm not going anywhere.
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Like, even if this guy rejects you, quote unquote.
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Like I don't reject you.
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I choose you.
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Here's how I show up for you.
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Like, you know, carving out the time for self-care every day, carving out the time to do the inner work, carving out the time to just play with my inner child because she deserves to just play, not when she's fully healed, right?
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So when I started showing up for myself and being the person that I was ready to attract and showing my inner child that and building it through consistency, because that is how we build trust in a relationship.
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It's by consistently showing up.
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Then she started to loosen her grip.
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And then I started in these situationships to notice it faster and faster.
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Okay, this is my shadow choosing the sky, or when I was engaging in a game of cat and mouse, which I usually would have let run rampant for years.
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You know what I did at the end of reading Existential Kink, right, about owning our shadow, removing the shade from it, being like, okay, some part of me loves this.
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I stopped, I stopped the situationship in its tracks.
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And, you know, before I used to not say anything because I didn't want to rock the boat, I didn't want to be the uh non-aloof, non-cool girl.
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I told the guy, I'm like, what is this?
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Like, do you see this going anywhere?
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And he was like, oh, fuck, like I don't, like I'm not into you in that way.
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And it was so scary to do in the moment, but it was like ripping the band-aid off, right?
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I didn't get the the response that would have maybe at the time felt like the highest outcome, but it was such a relief.
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It was such a relief because I I broke the cycle.
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I stopped engaging in that game that I could have engaged in for years and years and years of just um yeah, playing this cat and mouse where you never actually have to learn the answer, right?
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Where you never actually have to fully put yourself out there or reveal your vulnerability.
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And lo and fucking behold, guys, when I did that and I ripped the band-aid off and I sat through that rejection, although it's never rejection, it's a redirection.
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I don't believe in rejection.
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Six months later, I shit you not, I met my husband.
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But it was like the universe put that old cycle there as a test to say, like, are you ready to be fully met?
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You have to break this old cycle one more time.
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And that is the beauty of loving our shadow, is that it doesn't make us more prone to those shadowy behaviors, but it actually allows us to meet them with compassion and then we can actually transform them like magic and the waha.
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And so, with that, something that I love doing with my clients is, you know, we've gone through the the parts of how we can acknowledge our shadow, right?
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How is it sabotaging us?
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Um, what does it think it's protecting us from?
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And what does it need from us to trust us to put this put this behavior to rest?
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Um, the other two things I love doing to really buy into the existential kink form of it is doing what I like to call a shadow date, where you give your shadow full reign and you say, I'm not ashamed of you.
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You want to do that?
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Let's do it.
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And the example I love to talk about with this is in Matilda, that movie about the little girl who has supernatural powers, where the boy, uh, there's a boy in her class who steals a piece of chocolate cake from their principal, and he eats it because he just like loves sweets.
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And the principal is so mad and she wants to shame him.
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So she brings him on stage in the auditorium in front of everybody in the school, and she's like, You wanted to eat that chocolate cake?
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You're gonna have a full cake, and we're gonna all sit here and watch you eat it until not even a crumb is left.
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And so at first he's like so embarrassed, he's like, How am I gonna eat this whole chocolate cake?
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Right.
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And that's like the shame we all feel when our shadow is brought to light, or when people notice that we're doing things that we're embarrassed of.
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But then the the auditorium, the auditorium, auditorium starts chanting his name.
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And, you know, then he gets a second wind and he he's like, fuck yeah, and he starts like eating the cake, and then he finishes and everyone's chanting his name, and the principal is so mad because something that she wanted to use to shame him, he actually turned into his superpower by owning it and by like being victorious and being like, I control the narrative, you don't control the narrative, I'm gonna own this.
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And everyone celebrated him for it, for like sticking it to the principle.
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And so with the shadow date, it's kind of that same energy of like, okay, you're not gonna do this in the shadows under shame.
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I'm gonna do it with you, and we are just gonna like laugh at the ridiculousness of it.
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And so, to give you guys some examples, um, you know, I had some clients who always compared themselves to others.
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So, what did they do for their shadow date?
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They lit some candles, they made it ceremonial, they made it witchy, and then they looked on the profiles on Instagram of all the people they compared themselves to and just like noted how far behind they felt in each of them.
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And then they told their husband, like, can you believe so and so is da-da-da-da?
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And they had boxed it, time boxed it, which is important, so you know when it's gonna end for 30 minutes.
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And my client told me after she was like, it was so strange.
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It was like I used to do this all the time rampantly, but when I time boxed it for 30 minutes, it's like after five minutes, I no longer wanted to do it anymore.
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It kind of felt like icky.
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And so when you really bring your conscious awareness to it, it starts to lose its power over you.
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And another one that um somebody did is they, you know, really hate like um kind of just like they'll they'll eat a lot, binge, binge eat, whatever, feel bad about themselves.
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And they're like, I'm just gonna like sit on my couch, be a couch potato, like binge Netflix, and just like have my junk food and like ceremonialize the night.
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And then it just like no longer felt like something they were feeling bad about because they're like, I'm not shaming myself for it.
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I'm like treating it like a little treat to my shadow, like, okay, you wanted this, here you have it.
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And then again, they lost the desire to like keep doing it.
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So the point is not to shame yourself, but to be like, okay, if my shadow's gonna do it anyways, I'm gonna fucking enjoy it.
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I'm gonna fucking enjoy it because if I'm gonna do it anyways, I might as well enjoy it.
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And then again, it loosens its grip.
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The second thing that I love to do with our shadow is doing what I like to call a shadow bio.
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So we've all seen all of these kind of like, you know, love island drama uh dating TV shows where people have like crazy bios and they're like, and I am in it to get the man or get the money or whatever it might be, and they're like so sassy when they're doing it.
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So I have all my clients write bios for their shadow to personify them.
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And then they have to read it like this like Love Island dating show voice.
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Like when I did mine for um, you know, the unavailable men that I used to date.
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It was like, this is Meredith.
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She just loves giving her energy away to unavailable men who don't even know they have the power.
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She loves sitting and analyzing text with her friends.
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If only she had said this thing instead of that, then maybe everything would be different.
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And by giving them her power, she gets to like continue to avoid the creative projects that she knows will make her feel fulfilled so she can keep believing that she in fact is not and never will be enough.
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Like, welcome to the show, Meredith.
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And a funny thing happens, these shadows that used to bring us so much shame and pain, people end up like laughing.
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And I ask my clients, okay, like why are you laughing?
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They're like, well, it just sounds so ridiculous when I read it out loud, you know, and they even maybe give their shadow a separate name.
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So they're like, oh, so-and-so has been really active today.
00:18:36.319 --> 00:18:43.680
And it helps them distance themselves with a little humor from this part of themselves that maybe before they found quite painful.
00:18:43.839 --> 00:18:54.400
And I'm not saying do your shadow bio before you do the other steps because it very, it is very hard to laugh at ourselves, or laugh with ourselves rather.
00:18:54.559 --> 00:19:01.599
Laugh with ourselves, important distinction, but it is very hard to laugh with ourself before we have acknowledged our shadow.
00:19:01.759 --> 00:19:06.480
So the first step again is knowing where your shadow is causing havoc in your life.
00:19:06.640 --> 00:19:08.240
What is your shadow saying to you?
00:19:08.400 --> 00:19:14.079
And then if you view your shadow like your inner child, where did they learn this behavior back in the day?
00:19:14.240 --> 00:19:17.200
And why are they keep why do they keep perpetuating it?
00:19:17.279 --> 00:19:21.119
Because they think part of part of it is keeping them safe, right?
00:19:21.279 --> 00:19:25.440
And then what do you need to do to regain trust with them to help them feel safe?
00:19:25.599 --> 00:19:31.279
And then to really put the capstone on it, you can do the shadow date, and then you can do the shadow bio.
00:19:31.440 --> 00:19:41.279
And the beautiful thing about this is when we start to notice the shadow voice, it's not like by acknowledging it and quieting it down, we're like kicking our shadow into the closet.
00:19:41.359 --> 00:19:44.960
We're then becoming a team, like the dark and the light swirling together.
00:19:45.119 --> 00:19:47.440
So, what do we want to replace that shadow voice with?
00:19:47.599 --> 00:19:54.720
What is the other sexy devil on the other shoulder that's telling us, like, go for it, you got this, you know?
00:19:54.960 --> 00:20:01.440
And we get to then harness that energy from the shadow because matter is never created or destroyed, right?
00:20:01.519 --> 00:20:02.400
It is only transformed.
00:20:02.480 --> 00:20:10.880
So we get to transform that shadow voice into that, like, fuck yeah, alter ego voice of the version of us who already knows that everything we want has already happened.
00:20:10.960 --> 00:20:12.960
It is already done, and so it is.
00:20:13.200 --> 00:20:26.480
And when we are able to transform the shadow energy into the alchemy, into the version of us who already knows that it is, that it has been, that it will be, that is what I meant to say.
00:20:26.559 --> 00:20:30.319
That is the alchemy, that is the witchcraft, that is the transformation.
00:20:31.599 --> 00:20:33.119
Oh wow.
00:20:33.519 --> 00:20:37.519
I'm if that is not a treat for Halloween, guys, I don't know what is.
00:20:37.759 --> 00:20:41.519
So let us get comfortable in a little seat for our shadow meditation.
00:20:41.599 --> 00:20:54.079
I'll take another sip of my Paloma Penthre Mocktail, which is also supplying the mocktail adaptogenic witchy energy for all the events, the breathwork events that I've been leading this month.
00:20:54.160 --> 00:20:55.519
So thank you, Pentyre.
00:20:56.000 --> 00:21:00.079
And when you're ready, we'll just roll out our shoulders, take a deep breath in.
00:21:00.640 --> 00:21:02.640
Maybe a little witch's laugh out.
00:21:04.880 --> 00:21:08.480
You know, because we're not taking ourselves too seriously.
00:21:09.039 --> 00:21:12.640
Shadow work, but make it fun one more time just for shits and gigs.
00:21:13.519 --> 00:21:16.160
Letting out that witch's laugh or warlock.
00:21:18.640 --> 00:21:31.200
And as you take nice slow deep breaths, just noticing where in your body you start to draw your attention to internally when you think about your shadow.
00:21:31.359 --> 00:21:32.559
Where is your shadow living?
00:21:33.200 --> 00:21:36.720
Is it in your heart, your throat, your gut?
00:21:37.279 --> 00:21:39.839
Just breathing your awareness there.
00:21:41.440 --> 00:21:46.960
Almost like you're breathing your witch's cauldron there, brewing the alchemy.
00:21:52.559 --> 00:21:59.440
And as you breathe into that area, seeing your shadows.
00:22:00.240 --> 00:22:01.119
In front of you.
00:22:03.680 --> 00:22:07.759
Maybe they're your age, maybe they're younger or older.
00:22:08.400 --> 00:22:16.160
Maybe they look like a sexy catwoman or Batman or some sort of evil villain.
00:22:19.839 --> 00:22:23.119
Or maybe they just look like a different version of you, just noticing.
00:22:24.960 --> 00:22:26.400
What is their energy?
00:22:30.559 --> 00:22:32.799
And allowing yourself to see them fully.
00:22:33.759 --> 00:22:37.200
Without any judgment, almost like you finally turn the lights on.
00:22:37.839 --> 00:22:39.119
Noticing their face.
00:22:40.079 --> 00:22:42.000
Noticing their body posture.
00:22:50.240 --> 00:22:56.240
And then asking your shadow, why are they trying to get your attention?
00:22:59.279 --> 00:23:00.880
What do they want you to know?
00:23:04.480 --> 00:23:06.160
Trusting whatever they say.
00:23:17.279 --> 00:23:26.400
And then asking your shadow what do they need from you to put down their shield?
00:23:27.599 --> 00:23:28.799
To trust you.
00:23:29.359 --> 00:23:31.759
They no longer need to do this behavior.
00:23:32.319 --> 00:23:34.400
You love them, you're not mad.
00:23:35.680 --> 00:23:37.599
But what do they need from you?
00:23:38.079 --> 00:23:43.359
So they can release perpetuating the energy in this area.
00:23:52.880 --> 00:23:54.880
Letting them know you can do that.
00:23:57.599 --> 00:24:04.720
That you love them and that you're sorry for not paying attention to them sooner.
00:24:05.440 --> 00:24:22.880
And as you give them a hug, feeling this explosion of energy in that part of your body, the dark and the light swirling together, like you and your shadow becoming one, becoming even more powerful, harnessing the power of the dark, the light, it's shooting up through the crown of your head and down through your root.
00:24:23.039 --> 00:24:33.119
You and your shadow merged as one, feeling now the beauty and the polarities coexisting, the yes and.
00:24:36.400 --> 00:24:49.839
And now seeing in this beautiful mirror a reflection of that you who has integrated your shadow, who sees and who has alchemized the power of your shadow.
00:24:50.160 --> 00:24:58.720
Maybe they were using their forces for evil, but now you can redirect them into your grounded and clear and true intention.
00:24:59.599 --> 00:25:04.960
Getting a vision for what that is when you and your shadow are working together.
00:25:06.160 --> 00:25:14.720
How much more beautiful or handsome you feel, how grounded you feel, how much more confident every cell in your body feels.
00:25:16.720 --> 00:25:21.359
And then, yes, how this energy has amplified now that you are a team.
00:25:23.759 --> 00:26:07.519
As you feel it pulsing through your veins, imagine sending it out into the world, into the different areas of your life, starting to get a glimpse of how your integration of your shadow elevates your work, the swings you take there, how you use your voice, how it elevates your relationship to your finances, what you believe is possible, how you treat your finances, how it elevates and deepens intimacy in your friendships, in your relationships to family, how it deepens wholeness and intimacy in your romantic partnership.
00:26:08.960 --> 00:26:38.880
And most importantly, how it deepens knowing your entire self fully, how it deepens your relationship to yourself and just feeling the gratitude of you and your shadow being a team emanate throughout your body in your aura and asking your shadow for the perfect next step that you take as a team to release the old behavior and step into the new.
00:26:41.759 --> 00:26:47.599
Trusting whatever message comes through as you take a deep breath in.
00:26:48.480 --> 00:26:50.079
Exhale, let it go.
00:26:51.279 --> 00:26:53.200
And then one more breath in.
00:26:55.119 --> 00:26:58.960
Exhale, opening your eyes, coming back into this space.
00:26:59.039 --> 00:27:08.880
I'm like, wow, you look like a witchy goddess integrating your shadow, your light, merging the two together.
00:27:09.119 --> 00:27:11.200
That is the most trick and treat.
00:27:11.279 --> 00:27:12.880
That is the most alchemy.
00:27:13.039 --> 00:27:14.960
That is the powerful stuff.
00:27:15.200 --> 00:27:23.599
I am excited to see what happens, what continues to unfold as you work with your shadow, as you love on your shadow.
00:27:23.680 --> 00:27:26.720
And as you remember that our shadow is just a part of us.
00:27:26.960 --> 00:27:31.359
When we can treat them with love, compassion, care, and also a dash of humor.
00:27:31.519 --> 00:27:34.240
There's nothing that we can't do.
00:27:34.400 --> 00:27:36.240
And that is powerful stuff.
00:27:36.480 --> 00:27:43.119
Thank you guys for being with me on the shadow journey this week as we step into our festive Halloween.
00:27:43.440 --> 00:27:47.920
And be sure to like and subscribe if this was valuable for you.
00:27:48.079 --> 00:27:49.359
Let me know what came up.
00:27:49.440 --> 00:27:51.839
Send it to a friend who needs a little shadow integration.
00:27:51.920 --> 00:27:56.240
And I will see you next week for more powerful stuff.
00:28:05.680 --> 00:28:06.559
Hey you.
00:28:06.799 --> 00:28:09.599
Thank you for coming on this powerful journey with me.
00:28:09.680 --> 00:28:13.599
I hope it was as powerful for you as it was for me.
00:28:13.759 --> 00:28:23.200
And if it was, it would mean the world to me if you rate, review, and subscribe to powerful stuff so I can keep bringing you the goods.
00:28:23.359 --> 00:28:25.920
We can keep going on this transformative journey together.
00:28:26.079 --> 00:28:34.720
And if there's powerful stuff that you want to share with me, with the powerful stuff community, tag us on Instagram at that's powerful stuff or the Meredith Baker.
00:28:34.880 --> 00:28:39.119
And I look forward to seeing you next week for more powerful stuff.
00:00:10.320 --> 00:00:12.240
Hello, bienvenido.
00:00:13.039 --> 00:00:17.039
A powerful stuff where today we are gonna get a little witchy with it.
00:00:17.120 --> 00:00:18.399
It is mid-October.
00:00:18.719 --> 00:00:27.120
Halloween is just around the corner, so I thought, what better time to discuss the elusive, the saboteur, the sexy.
00:00:27.199 --> 00:00:28.079
We love to hate them.
00:00:28.160 --> 00:00:28.960
We hate to love them.
00:00:29.120 --> 00:00:30.320
Our shadow.
00:00:30.719 --> 00:00:31.920
Our shadow.
00:00:32.079 --> 00:00:38.479
And you might be like, Meredith, what is your shadow?
00:00:38.799 --> 00:00:39.119
Right?
00:00:39.200 --> 00:00:45.520
And we're not talking about the literal one we see at high noon when we're walking on the street.
00:00:45.759 --> 00:00:48.960
Though there are definitely metaphors to draw with that.
00:00:49.200 --> 00:00:55.759
We are talking about that side of ourself that sabotages us right when we are in the brink of a success.
00:00:55.920 --> 00:01:01.840
Or maybe it's like those sneaky nights where we end up doom scrolling or comparing ourselves to others.
00:01:02.079 --> 00:01:04.640
And then we say, Why did I do that?
00:01:04.799 --> 00:01:06.400
That's so annoying, right?
00:01:06.480 --> 00:01:13.439
That self-loathing, like the Grinch when he's sitting atop his mountain, just like loathing in his self-patred.
00:01:13.920 --> 00:01:18.400
And the thing is, our shadow is a little misunderstood.
00:01:18.640 --> 00:01:22.239
So in this video, you are gonna learn what is your shadow?
00:01:22.480 --> 00:01:23.439
Why does it matter?
00:01:23.680 --> 00:01:32.480
How can you actually learn to bridge the dark, the light, to love your shadow so you can actually harness it so you can get to where you want to go?
00:01:32.799 --> 00:01:43.840
And that way we can have our Halloween with more tricks or more treats, less tricks, and isn't that powerful stuff?
00:01:44.159 --> 00:01:50.079
So I like to describe our shadow as like that crazy friend that we all had in college.
00:01:50.239 --> 00:01:51.840
We all love them.
00:01:52.239 --> 00:02:03.519
And they go out, they have a wild night at the club, we pick them up, we tuck them in bed, we get them some electrolytes, we're like, she is crazy, but I love her.
00:02:03.840 --> 00:02:10.479
And you wake up the next morning and you hear all of her insane stories, and you don't shame her, you're just like, you know what?
00:02:10.719 --> 00:02:13.280
She's crazy, I wouldn't do that, but I love her.
00:02:13.360 --> 00:02:15.280
And that's kind of like our shadow, right?
00:02:15.439 --> 00:02:18.159
It's like that part of us that kind of acts out.
00:02:18.319 --> 00:02:29.039
And when we can have this like loving levity, this cheeky, adoring energy toward our shadow, that's actually when it will loosen its grip over us.
00:02:29.199 --> 00:02:31.599
What happens when we don't give our shadow the love?
00:02:31.680 --> 00:02:36.800
So I guess I started off by telling you guys, you know, the way we could love our shadow.
00:02:37.039 --> 00:02:48.879
But how it usually happens with our shadow is a most people don't even realize that their shadow is separate than them or that their shadow is even running rampant in the background.
00:02:49.120 --> 00:02:57.759
But as the psychologist Carl Jung says, until we make the subconscious conscious, it will rule our lives and we will call it fate.
00:02:57.919 --> 00:03:00.159
So we are calling forth our shadow.
00:03:00.400 --> 00:03:07.280
And our shadow is this part of us that is scared of change.
00:03:07.360 --> 00:03:09.280
They are scared of growth.
00:03:09.520 --> 00:03:14.560
And so they do things and they say things to us that feel so true.
00:03:14.639 --> 00:03:22.719
They feel so factual in the moment because they are trying to keep us at a lower level because they are scared of what will happen if we expand, if we are seen.
00:03:22.879 --> 00:03:26.080
So that's why we keep being like, why did I say that?
00:03:26.240 --> 00:03:29.680
Why do I keep going for emotionally unavailable men?
00:03:29.919 --> 00:03:34.960
Why do I keep scrolling on Instagram when I know it makes me feel worse about myself?
00:03:35.199 --> 00:03:47.280
It's like our shadow distracting us from, you know, the Instagram example of uh of actually doing the thing where we are going to take the big swing, where we are gonna be seen, the emotionally unavailable man example.
00:03:47.439 --> 00:03:54.560
Well, then it protects us from actually putting ourselves in front of someone who we might actually like really be seen by.
00:03:54.639 --> 00:03:58.560
And thus, how vulnerable would that be to actually be unconditionally loved by someone?
00:03:58.639 --> 00:04:01.360
How terrifying that's not what we're used to.
00:04:01.520 --> 00:04:07.439
So our shadow, bless their heart, I think they are protecting us.
00:04:07.680 --> 00:04:14.400
And so what we can do, the first step is just to acknowledge their existence, right?
00:04:14.560 --> 00:04:22.399
Because if we try to sweep our shadow under the rug, or if you think about you see parents ignoring their kids having a temper tantrum, what do the kids do?
00:04:22.560 --> 00:04:26.959
They yell louder because they are like, I am not shutting up till I'm getting your attention.
00:04:27.120 --> 00:04:32.079
So the first step with our shadow, when you notice it is A, just noticing it.
00:04:32.240 --> 00:04:33.360
What is it doing in your life?
00:04:33.519 --> 00:04:38.560
What are the things that it's doing that that is kind of wrecking havoc in your life?
00:04:38.720 --> 00:04:41.040
Just writing them down, loving examples.
00:04:41.199 --> 00:04:44.079
I'll give you guys a few of mine because we are in this together.
00:04:44.319 --> 00:04:48.560
Definitely guilty as charged, the scrolling, the comparing.
00:04:48.720 --> 00:04:52.720
I'm like, even as a healed life coach, no, we are never healed.
00:04:52.800 --> 00:04:54.560
We are always healing, right?
00:04:54.720 --> 00:05:02.959
And when I notice that I'm not giving myself the acknowledgement that I need, that is when I reach for the junk food, which is like the low-hanging shadow food, if you will.
00:05:03.199 --> 00:05:05.279
And yeah, I scroll, I compare.
00:05:05.360 --> 00:05:13.040
Because then again, it distracts from the big swings that I actually want to be taking, like making this YouTube video for you guys.
00:05:13.360 --> 00:05:22.079
And what it used to be when I first was getting in the self-development world, I noticed it was my pattern dating emotionally unavailable men.
00:05:22.160 --> 00:05:23.920
I'd always choose these guys.
00:05:24.480 --> 00:05:26.079
Like somebody call them fuckboys.
00:05:26.240 --> 00:05:32.000
No, I'm just, you know, I'm sure they're all lovely men with we all make mistakes.
00:05:32.160 --> 00:05:34.480
Anyways, I wasn't perfect.
00:05:34.639 --> 00:05:40.399
I was choosing men that were not emotionally available and nor giving me any indication that they were.
00:05:40.639 --> 00:05:45.839
And even though I'm a gluten-free celiac, you know, I was going for the bread crumbing.
00:05:46.079 --> 00:05:54.240
I was living for those texts that were inconsistent where they would ghost me and then gaslight ghost and then gaslight, and part of me loved it.
00:05:54.319 --> 00:06:00.720
You know, it's like almost if a guy was too available or too nice, I'd be like, wait, something's off.
00:06:00.879 --> 00:06:02.480
Like, why is he too available?
00:06:02.639 --> 00:06:04.000
Why is he too nice?
00:06:04.319 --> 00:06:09.199
And so I ended up going for these guys where it felt like a prize that I was getting, right?
00:06:09.279 --> 00:06:29.360
Like I really like was maneuvering a chess game, responding exactly the in the amount of like time that had lapsed with the exact right cheeky response, not giving away too much emotional vulnerability to keep the game going, where then we mate, you know, meet up once every other full moon or whatever it might be.
00:06:29.519 --> 00:06:34.720
I can't tell you how many like times this pattern repeated itself.
00:06:35.040 --> 00:06:44.319
And when I was reading the book Existential Kink by Carolyn Elliott, she talks about we do these things because like some part of us likes it.
00:06:44.399 --> 00:06:47.199
And your intellectual self is like, wait, hold up.
00:06:47.360 --> 00:06:48.879
Why would I like this?
00:06:49.360 --> 00:06:51.199
I this is the opposite of what I want.
00:06:51.360 --> 00:06:52.160
I want true love.
00:06:52.240 --> 00:06:52.879
I want marriage.
00:06:52.959 --> 00:06:57.519
But then it's like, okay, but why do you keep choosing these types of relationships?
00:06:57.839 --> 00:07:00.560
You are a person in full agency.
00:07:00.800 --> 00:07:06.079
You can take full ownership of whether you keep engaging versus always venting to your friends, why me?
00:07:06.160 --> 00:07:07.360
Why am I the victim here?
00:07:07.519 --> 00:07:09.519
And then you keep choosing another guy just like that.
00:07:09.600 --> 00:07:12.959
And then you have friends being like, oh my gosh, here she goes again, right?
00:07:13.120 --> 00:07:14.000
We've all been there.
00:07:14.079 --> 00:07:14.879
That was me.
00:07:15.040 --> 00:07:20.319
That was me during this self-healing journey with these emotionally unavailable guys.
00:07:20.399 --> 00:07:25.040
So then I looked at Meredith the shadow, and I was like, some part of me just loved it.
00:07:25.120 --> 00:07:27.759
I loved some part of me, my shadow part, right?
00:07:27.839 --> 00:07:29.600
First, I acknowledge what she was doing.
00:07:29.759 --> 00:07:32.000
She was going for the emotionally unavailable men.
00:07:32.160 --> 00:07:35.439
Then I noticed like what she was saying, like to me internally.
00:07:35.600 --> 00:07:38.800
And sometimes these things that they're saying to us can be quite bitchy, right?
00:07:38.879 --> 00:07:40.959
But I wrote them down without any judgment.
00:07:41.199 --> 00:07:51.839
And, you know, it was like she was saying, like, you're so lucky to be um dating this guy, or he's like so hot.
00:07:52.000 --> 00:07:53.040
Are you sure you can do better?
00:07:53.120 --> 00:07:54.639
But you're this, but you're that, right?
00:07:54.720 --> 00:07:57.199
Like really mean things we would never say to a friend.
00:07:57.360 --> 00:08:01.759
Um, and it was because some part of me believed that I was not enough.
00:08:01.920 --> 00:08:03.360
So then guess what?
00:08:03.680 --> 00:08:18.959
These guys that I kept choosing got to help me fulfill that belief that I was not enough because I would go after them, we would date, they would pull away, I would try harder, they would get freaked out by that, disappear, help reinforce I am not enough.
00:08:19.040 --> 00:08:28.000
So it played perfectly into my shadow's evil plan of how I could perpetuate this cycle.
00:08:28.240 --> 00:08:36.559
And by perpetuating that cycle, my shadow thought she was protecting me from, again, actual unconditional love, where, God forbid, what if I was enough?
00:08:36.639 --> 00:08:37.759
What would that mean?
00:08:38.000 --> 00:08:57.360
Not just with dating and finding the love of my life, but I can't tell you how many thousands of hours I was distracted by these guys that I was chasing, that I could be working on some of my creative projects that were nearest and dearest to my heart, that were like the long firm, long-term doling, right?
00:08:57.519 --> 00:09:11.919
That I never took the time to actually sit down and push those things across the finish line because I was too busy analyzing these endless, like mind fuck cycles with these low hanging relationships.
00:09:12.240 --> 00:09:15.360
So first step, I acknowledged it.
00:09:15.519 --> 00:09:17.600
I acknowledged what my shadow was doing.
00:09:17.840 --> 00:09:19.679
Second step, I wrote down what she was saying.
00:09:19.759 --> 00:09:24.080
And then third step, I noticed what she was trying to protect me from, right?
00:09:24.240 --> 00:09:25.759
What was she scared of?
00:09:25.919 --> 00:09:31.200
And this is where we want to start to think of our shadow as just a scared inner child, right?
00:09:31.440 --> 00:09:40.320
She's like frozen in time from this time or place in our youth and our adolescence, where we learned that this would somehow keep us safe, right?
00:09:40.720 --> 00:09:45.919
By um not being fully emotional available with somebody that would somehow keep me safe, right?
00:09:46.000 --> 00:09:53.840
So I was trying to rep, like that was my misguided um inner child interpretation of that at some point in time.
00:09:54.000 --> 00:09:58.320
And so I had to acknowledge where that came from, where that belief came from.
00:09:58.480 --> 00:10:05.279
And then I had to sit my shadow down, like she was a little seven-year-old Meredith, and say, like, what are you afraid of?
00:10:05.440 --> 00:10:12.639
What are you afraid will happen if we actually like, you know, go after someone who equally wants to go after us, who's equally available?
00:10:12.799 --> 00:10:14.399
What do you fear will happen?
00:10:14.639 --> 00:10:18.879
And what do you need from me to trust you that I've got you in this gray area, right?
00:10:18.960 --> 00:10:22.320
They're used to existing in the black or white area in the extremes.
00:10:22.480 --> 00:10:25.600
That's why they keep perpetuating these things we say we want to avoid.
00:10:25.759 --> 00:10:31.840
So if we're trying to break out of that cycle, what does our shadow need from us to feel seen, to feel heard, to feel acknowledged?
00:10:31.919 --> 00:10:34.399
Maybe Little Meredith needed to hear, I love you.
00:10:34.480 --> 00:10:35.679
I'm not going anywhere.
00:10:35.840 --> 00:10:38.159
Like, even if this guy rejects you, quote unquote.
00:10:38.240 --> 00:10:39.519
Like I don't reject you.
00:10:39.679 --> 00:10:40.320
I choose you.
00:10:40.480 --> 00:10:41.759
Here's how I show up for you.
00:10:41.919 --> 00:10:52.559
Like, you know, carving out the time for self-care every day, carving out the time to do the inner work, carving out the time to just play with my inner child because she deserves to just play, not when she's fully healed, right?
00:10:52.799 --> 00:11:03.360
So when I started showing up for myself and being the person that I was ready to attract and showing my inner child that and building it through consistency, because that is how we build trust in a relationship.
00:11:03.519 --> 00:11:05.120
It's by consistently showing up.
00:11:05.279 --> 00:11:07.200
Then she started to loosen her grip.
00:11:07.360 --> 00:11:11.519
And then I started in these situationships to notice it faster and faster.
00:11:11.679 --> 00:11:19.039
Okay, this is my shadow choosing the sky, or when I was engaging in a game of cat and mouse, which I usually would have let run rampant for years.
00:11:19.200 --> 00:11:28.960
You know what I did at the end of reading Existential Kink, right, about owning our shadow, removing the shade from it, being like, okay, some part of me loves this.
00:11:30.159 --> 00:11:33.360
I stopped, I stopped the situationship in its tracks.
00:11:33.519 --> 00:11:42.240
And, you know, before I used to not say anything because I didn't want to rock the boat, I didn't want to be the uh non-aloof, non-cool girl.
00:11:42.480 --> 00:11:44.159
I told the guy, I'm like, what is this?
00:11:44.320 --> 00:11:45.919
Like, do you see this going anywhere?
00:11:46.080 --> 00:11:50.399
And he was like, oh, fuck, like I don't, like I'm not into you in that way.
00:11:50.720 --> 00:11:55.679
And it was so scary to do in the moment, but it was like ripping the band-aid off, right?
00:11:55.840 --> 00:12:02.240
I didn't get the the response that would have maybe at the time felt like the highest outcome, but it was such a relief.
00:12:02.480 --> 00:12:06.799
It was such a relief because I I broke the cycle.
00:12:06.879 --> 00:12:20.799
I stopped engaging in that game that I could have engaged in for years and years and years of just um yeah, playing this cat and mouse where you never actually have to learn the answer, right?
00:12:20.960 --> 00:12:25.679
Where you never actually have to fully put yourself out there or reveal your vulnerability.
00:12:25.840 --> 00:12:34.240
And lo and fucking behold, guys, when I did that and I ripped the band-aid off and I sat through that rejection, although it's never rejection, it's a redirection.
00:12:34.320 --> 00:12:35.679
I don't believe in rejection.
00:12:35.919 --> 00:12:38.559
Six months later, I shit you not, I met my husband.
00:12:38.639 --> 00:12:45.679
But it was like the universe put that old cycle there as a test to say, like, are you ready to be fully met?
00:12:45.840 --> 00:12:48.320
You have to break this old cycle one more time.
00:12:48.559 --> 00:13:06.559
And that is the beauty of loving our shadow, is that it doesn't make us more prone to those shadowy behaviors, but it actually allows us to meet them with compassion and then we can actually transform them like magic and the waha.
00:13:07.519 --> 00:13:17.279
And so, with that, something that I love doing with my clients is, you know, we've gone through the the parts of how we can acknowledge our shadow, right?
00:13:17.360 --> 00:13:19.120
How is it sabotaging us?
00:13:19.279 --> 00:13:22.799
Um, what does it think it's protecting us from?
00:13:23.120 --> 00:13:29.440
And what does it need from us to trust us to put this put this behavior to rest?
00:13:29.840 --> 00:13:41.440
Um, the other two things I love doing to really buy into the existential kink form of it is doing what I like to call a shadow date, where you give your shadow full reign and you say, I'm not ashamed of you.
00:13:41.600 --> 00:13:42.320
You want to do that?
00:13:42.480 --> 00:13:42.960
Let's do it.
00:13:43.120 --> 00:14:02.159
And the example I love to talk about with this is in Matilda, that movie about the little girl who has supernatural powers, where the boy, uh, there's a boy in her class who steals a piece of chocolate cake from their principal, and he eats it because he just like loves sweets.
00:14:02.480 --> 00:14:06.399
And the principal is so mad and she wants to shame him.
00:14:06.480 --> 00:14:13.919
So she brings him on stage in the auditorium in front of everybody in the school, and she's like, You wanted to eat that chocolate cake?
00:14:14.080 --> 00:14:21.440
You're gonna have a full cake, and we're gonna all sit here and watch you eat it until not even a crumb is left.
00:14:21.679 --> 00:14:26.399
And so at first he's like so embarrassed, he's like, How am I gonna eat this whole chocolate cake?
00:14:26.480 --> 00:14:26.720
Right.
00:14:26.879 --> 00:14:33.120
And that's like the shame we all feel when our shadow is brought to light, or when people notice that we're doing things that we're embarrassed of.
00:14:33.679 --> 00:14:40.240
But then the the auditorium, the auditorium, auditorium starts chanting his name.
00:14:40.480 --> 00:15:02.960
And, you know, then he gets a second wind and he he's like, fuck yeah, and he starts like eating the cake, and then he finishes and everyone's chanting his name, and the principal is so mad because something that she wanted to use to shame him, he actually turned into his superpower by owning it and by like being victorious and being like, I control the narrative, you don't control the narrative, I'm gonna own this.
00:15:03.039 --> 00:15:06.960
And everyone celebrated him for it, for like sticking it to the principle.
00:15:07.120 --> 00:15:13.039
And so with the shadow date, it's kind of that same energy of like, okay, you're not gonna do this in the shadows under shame.
00:15:13.120 --> 00:15:17.279
I'm gonna do it with you, and we are just gonna like laugh at the ridiculousness of it.
00:15:17.519 --> 00:15:25.039
And so, to give you guys some examples, um, you know, I had some clients who always compared themselves to others.
00:15:25.279 --> 00:15:27.120
So, what did they do for their shadow date?
00:15:27.200 --> 00:15:40.559
They lit some candles, they made it ceremonial, they made it witchy, and then they looked on the profiles on Instagram of all the people they compared themselves to and just like noted how far behind they felt in each of them.
00:15:40.639 --> 00:15:45.120
And then they told their husband, like, can you believe so and so is da-da-da-da?
00:15:45.360 --> 00:15:50.080
And they had boxed it, time boxed it, which is important, so you know when it's gonna end for 30 minutes.
00:15:50.240 --> 00:15:53.039
And my client told me after she was like, it was so strange.
00:15:53.120 --> 00:16:00.639
It was like I used to do this all the time rampantly, but when I time boxed it for 30 minutes, it's like after five minutes, I no longer wanted to do it anymore.
00:16:00.720 --> 00:16:02.159
It kind of felt like icky.
00:16:02.320 --> 00:16:07.600
And so when you really bring your conscious awareness to it, it starts to lose its power over you.
00:16:07.919 --> 00:16:28.159
And another one that um somebody did is they, you know, really hate like um kind of just like they'll they'll eat a lot, binge, binge eat, whatever, feel bad about themselves.
00:16:28.399 --> 00:16:36.720
And they're like, I'm just gonna like sit on my couch, be a couch potato, like binge Netflix, and just like have my junk food and like ceremonialize the night.
00:16:36.879 --> 00:16:42.720
And then it just like no longer felt like something they were feeling bad about because they're like, I'm not shaming myself for it.
00:16:42.879 --> 00:16:47.600
I'm like treating it like a little treat to my shadow, like, okay, you wanted this, here you have it.
00:16:47.759 --> 00:16:51.120
And then again, they lost the desire to like keep doing it.
00:16:51.279 --> 00:16:56.960
So the point is not to shame yourself, but to be like, okay, if my shadow's gonna do it anyways, I'm gonna fucking enjoy it.
00:16:57.120 --> 00:17:00.559
I'm gonna fucking enjoy it because if I'm gonna do it anyways, I might as well enjoy it.
00:17:00.720 --> 00:17:02.799
And then again, it loosens its grip.
00:17:02.960 --> 00:17:08.559
The second thing that I love to do with our shadow is doing what I like to call a shadow bio.
00:17:08.640 --> 00:17:24.960
So we've all seen all of these kind of like, you know, love island drama uh dating TV shows where people have like crazy bios and they're like, and I am in it to get the man or get the money or whatever it might be, and they're like so sassy when they're doing it.
00:17:25.119 --> 00:17:29.359
So I have all my clients write bios for their shadow to personify them.
00:17:29.519 --> 00:17:33.200
And then they have to read it like this like Love Island dating show voice.
00:17:33.359 --> 00:17:41.680
Like when I did mine for um, you know, the unavailable men that I used to date.
00:17:41.839 --> 00:17:42.960
It was like, this is Meredith.
00:17:43.200 --> 00:17:49.039
She just loves giving her energy away to unavailable men who don't even know they have the power.
00:17:49.200 --> 00:17:51.759
She loves sitting and analyzing text with her friends.
00:17:51.839 --> 00:17:56.400
If only she had said this thing instead of that, then maybe everything would be different.
00:17:56.559 --> 00:18:14.640
And by giving them her power, she gets to like continue to avoid the creative projects that she knows will make her feel fulfilled so she can keep believing that she in fact is not and never will be enough.
00:18:14.880 --> 00:18:16.799
Like, welcome to the show, Meredith.
00:18:17.200 --> 00:18:23.839
And a funny thing happens, these shadows that used to bring us so much shame and pain, people end up like laughing.
00:18:23.920 --> 00:18:25.920
And I ask my clients, okay, like why are you laughing?
00:18:26.079 --> 00:18:32.480
They're like, well, it just sounds so ridiculous when I read it out loud, you know, and they even maybe give their shadow a separate name.
00:18:32.640 --> 00:18:36.160
So they're like, oh, so-and-so has been really active today.
00:18:36.319 --> 00:18:43.680
And it helps them distance themselves with a little humor from this part of themselves that maybe before they found quite painful.
00:18:43.839 --> 00:18:54.400
And I'm not saying do your shadow bio before you do the other steps because it very, it is very hard to laugh at ourselves, or laugh with ourselves rather.
00:18:54.559 --> 00:19:01.599
Laugh with ourselves, important distinction, but it is very hard to laugh with ourself before we have acknowledged our shadow.
00:19:01.759 --> 00:19:06.480
So the first step again is knowing where your shadow is causing havoc in your life.
00:19:06.640 --> 00:19:08.240
What is your shadow saying to you?
00:19:08.400 --> 00:19:14.079
And then if you view your shadow like your inner child, where did they learn this behavior back in the day?
00:19:14.240 --> 00:19:17.200
And why are they keep why do they keep perpetuating it?
00:19:17.279 --> 00:19:21.119
Because they think part of part of it is keeping them safe, right?
00:19:21.279 --> 00:19:25.440
And then what do you need to do to regain trust with them to help them feel safe?
00:19:25.599 --> 00:19:31.279
And then to really put the capstone on it, you can do the shadow date, and then you can do the shadow bio.
00:19:31.440 --> 00:19:41.279
And the beautiful thing about this is when we start to notice the shadow voice, it's not like by acknowledging it and quieting it down, we're like kicking our shadow into the closet.
00:19:41.359 --> 00:19:44.960
We're then becoming a team, like the dark and the light swirling together.
00:19:45.119 --> 00:19:47.440
So, what do we want to replace that shadow voice with?
00:19:47.599 --> 00:19:54.720
What is the other sexy devil on the other shoulder that's telling us, like, go for it, you got this, you know?
00:19:54.960 --> 00:20:01.440
And we get to then harness that energy from the shadow because matter is never created or destroyed, right?
00:20:01.519 --> 00:20:02.400
It is only transformed.
00:20:02.480 --> 00:20:10.880
So we get to transform that shadow voice into that, like, fuck yeah, alter ego voice of the version of us who already knows that everything we want has already happened.
00:20:10.960 --> 00:20:12.960
It is already done, and so it is.
00:20:13.200 --> 00:20:26.480
And when we are able to transform the shadow energy into the alchemy, into the version of us who already knows that it is, that it has been, that it will be, that is what I meant to say.
00:20:26.559 --> 00:20:30.319
That is the alchemy, that is the witchcraft, that is the transformation.
00:20:31.599 --> 00:20:33.119
Oh wow.
00:20:33.519 --> 00:20:37.519
I'm if that is not a treat for Halloween, guys, I don't know what is.
00:20:37.759 --> 00:20:41.519
So let us get comfortable in a little seat for our shadow meditation.
00:20:41.599 --> 00:20:54.079
I'll take another sip of my Paloma Penthre Mocktail, which is also supplying the mocktail adaptogenic witchy energy for all the events, the breathwork events that I've been leading this month.
00:20:54.160 --> 00:20:55.519
So thank you, Pentyre.
00:20:56.000 --> 00:21:00.079
And when you're ready, we'll just roll out our shoulders, take a deep breath in.
00:21:00.640 --> 00:21:02.640
Maybe a little witch's laugh out.
00:21:04.880 --> 00:21:08.480
You know, because we're not taking ourselves too seriously.
00:21:09.039 --> 00:21:12.640
Shadow work, but make it fun one more time just for shits and gigs.
00:21:13.519 --> 00:21:16.160
Letting out that witch's laugh or warlock.
00:21:18.640 --> 00:21:31.200
And as you take nice slow deep breaths, just noticing where in your body you start to draw your attention to internally when you think about your shadow.
00:21:31.359 --> 00:21:32.559
Where is your shadow living?
00:21:33.200 --> 00:21:36.720
Is it in your heart, your throat, your gut?
00:21:37.279 --> 00:21:39.839
Just breathing your awareness there.
00:21:41.440 --> 00:21:46.960
Almost like you're breathing your witch's cauldron there, brewing the alchemy.
00:21:52.559 --> 00:21:59.440
And as you breathe into that area, seeing your shadows.
00:22:00.240 --> 00:22:01.119
In front of you.
00:22:03.680 --> 00:22:07.759
Maybe they're your age, maybe they're younger or older.
00:22:08.400 --> 00:22:16.160
Maybe they look like a sexy catwoman or Batman or some sort of evil villain.
00:22:19.839 --> 00:22:23.119
Or maybe they just look like a different version of you, just noticing.
00:22:24.960 --> 00:22:26.400
What is their energy?
00:22:30.559 --> 00:22:32.799
And allowing yourself to see them fully.
00:22:33.759 --> 00:22:37.200
Without any judgment, almost like you finally turn the lights on.
00:22:37.839 --> 00:22:39.119
Noticing their face.
00:22:40.079 --> 00:22:42.000
Noticing their body posture.
00:22:50.240 --> 00:22:56.240
And then asking your shadow, why are they trying to get your attention?
00:22:59.279 --> 00:23:00.880
What do they want you to know?
00:23:04.480 --> 00:23:06.160
Trusting whatever they say.
00:23:17.279 --> 00:23:26.400
And then asking your shadow what do they need from you to put down their shield?
00:23:27.599 --> 00:23:28.799
To trust you.
00:23:29.359 --> 00:23:31.759
They no longer need to do this behavior.
00:23:32.319 --> 00:23:34.400
You love them, you're not mad.
00:23:35.680 --> 00:23:37.599
But what do they need from you?
00:23:38.079 --> 00:23:43.359
So they can release perpetuating the energy in this area.
00:23:52.880 --> 00:23:54.880
Letting them know you can do that.
00:23:57.599 --> 00:24:04.720
That you love them and that you're sorry for not paying attention to them sooner.
00:24:05.440 --> 00:24:22.880
And as you give them a hug, feeling this explosion of energy in that part of your body, the dark and the light swirling together, like you and your shadow becoming one, becoming even more powerful, harnessing the power of the dark, the light, it's shooting up through the crown of your head and down through your root.
00:24:23.039 --> 00:24:33.119
You and your shadow merged as one, feeling now the beauty and the polarities coexisting, the yes and.
00:24:36.400 --> 00:24:49.839
And now seeing in this beautiful mirror a reflection of that you who has integrated your shadow, who sees and who has alchemized the power of your shadow.
00:24:50.160 --> 00:24:58.720
Maybe they were using their forces for evil, but now you can redirect them into your grounded and clear and true intention.
00:24:59.599 --> 00:25:04.960
Getting a vision for what that is when you and your shadow are working together.
00:25:06.160 --> 00:25:14.720
How much more beautiful or handsome you feel, how grounded you feel, how much more confident every cell in your body feels.
00:25:16.720 --> 00:25:21.359
And then, yes, how this energy has amplified now that you are a team.
00:25:23.759 --> 00:26:07.519
As you feel it pulsing through your veins, imagine sending it out into the world, into the different areas of your life, starting to get a glimpse of how your integration of your shadow elevates your work, the swings you take there, how you use your voice, how it elevates your relationship to your finances, what you believe is possible, how you treat your finances, how it elevates and deepens intimacy in your friendships, in your relationships to family, how it deepens wholeness and intimacy in your romantic partnership.
00:26:08.960 --> 00:26:38.880
And most importantly, how it deepens knowing your entire self fully, how it deepens your relationship to yourself and just feeling the gratitude of you and your shadow being a team emanate throughout your body in your aura and asking your shadow for the perfect next step that you take as a team to release the old behavior and step into the new.
00:26:41.759 --> 00:26:47.599
Trusting whatever message comes through as you take a deep breath in.
00:26:48.480 --> 00:26:50.079
Exhale, let it go.
00:26:51.279 --> 00:26:53.200
And then one more breath in.
00:26:55.119 --> 00:26:58.960
Exhale, opening your eyes, coming back into this space.
00:26:59.039 --> 00:27:08.880
I'm like, wow, you look like a witchy goddess integrating your shadow, your light, merging the two together.
00:27:09.119 --> 00:27:11.200
That is the most trick and treat.
00:27:11.279 --> 00:27:12.880
That is the most alchemy.
00:27:13.039 --> 00:27:14.960
That is the powerful stuff.
00:27:15.200 --> 00:27:23.599
I am excited to see what happens, what continues to unfold as you work with your shadow, as you love on your shadow.
00:27:23.680 --> 00:27:26.720
And as you remember that our shadow is just a part of us.
00:27:26.960 --> 00:27:31.359
When we can treat them with love, compassion, care, and also a dash of humor.
00:27:31.519 --> 00:27:34.240
There's nothing that we can't do.
00:27:34.400 --> 00:27:36.240
And that is powerful stuff.
00:27:36.480 --> 00:27:43.119
Thank you guys for being with me on the shadow journey this week as we step into our festive Halloween.
00:27:43.440 --> 00:27:47.920
And be sure to like and subscribe if this was valuable for you.
00:27:48.079 --> 00:27:49.359
Let me know what came up.
00:27:49.440 --> 00:27:51.839
Send it to a friend who needs a little shadow integration.
00:27:51.920 --> 00:27:56.240
And I will see you next week for more powerful stuff.
00:28:05.680 --> 00:28:06.559
Hey you.
00:28:06.799 --> 00:28:09.599
Thank you for coming on this powerful journey with me.
00:28:09.680 --> 00:28:13.599
I hope it was as powerful for you as it was for me.
00:28:13.759 --> 00:28:23.200
And if it was, it would mean the world to me if you rate, review, and subscribe to powerful stuff so I can keep bringing you the goods.
00:28:23.359 --> 00:28:25.920
We can keep going on this transformative journey together.
00:28:26.079 --> 00:28:34.720
And if there's powerful stuff that you want to share with me, with the powerful stuff community, tag us on Instagram at that's powerful stuff or the Meredith Baker.
00:28:34.880 --> 00:28:39.119
And I look forward to seeing you next week for more powerful stuff.
