WEBVTT
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From the roof garden of New York's New Amsterdam Theatre,
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a new master of ceremonies steps to the microphone for
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a Canada Dry musical program. On May 2nd, 1932, Jack
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Benny made his first paid professional radio appearance, introducing George
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Olsen and his orchestra with Ethel Shutter and other vocalists.
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This is episode one of the Jack Benny Program, JB1932-05-02
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First Show, heard over NBC's Blue Network from WJZ in
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New York. Between the music and sponsor messages, Benny offers
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the comic remarks that would soon become familiar to radio audiences.
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We now take you back to the original broadcast.
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Thank you.
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Tonight, Canada Dry, the campaign of ginger ales, presents a
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series of programs to advertise the new made-to-order Canada Dry,
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which you can now buy by the glass at drugstores
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and soda fountains. This series will feature George Olsen and
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his music, Miss Ethel Chute, the star of many Broadway successes,
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and that suave comedian, dry humorist, and famous master of ceremonies,
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Jack Benny.
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Thank you, Mr. Thorgerson. That's pretty good from a man
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who doesn't even know me. Ladies and gentlemen, this is
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Jack Benny talking and making my first appearance on the
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air professionally. By that I mean I'm finally getting paid,
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which of course will be a great relief to my creditors.
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I really don't know why I'm here. I'm supposed to
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be a sort of a master of ceremonies and tell
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you all the things that will happen, which would happen anyway.
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I must introduce the different artists who could easily introduce themselves.
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and also talk about the Canada Dry made to order
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by the glass, which is a waste of time, as
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you know all about it. You drink it like it
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and don't want to hear about it. So, ladies and gentlemen,
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a master of ceremonies is really a fellow who is
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unemployed and gets paid for it. I think you will
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like the entertainment arranged for tonight, I hope. Of course,
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I haven't seen any of the program myself, but I've
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spoken to the artists individually. They seem to think it's
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awfully good. The first number will be a selection by
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George Olsen and his orchestra. I think this, being our
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first program together, it is no more than fair that
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I have you meet Mr. Olsen personally. He's really a
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very charming fellow and one of the few directors who
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comes to and from his work on roller skates. That's
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perhaps the silliest thing that I'll say all night, I think.
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I might add that Mr. Olsen is very, very handsome.
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I told you, George, I'd get that in there. But
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as long as we are both on the air, of course,
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I won't have to worry about that. Oh, George, come here.
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I want you to say hello to the folks.
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Hello, everybody.
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That was George Olsen, ladies and gentlemen. He rehearsed that
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speech all week. You know, this is really all play
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with George. He doesn't have to work at all. I
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might say that Mr. Olsen is one of the wealthiest
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conductors in America. You know what I mean. He owns
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his own car. Of course, the other boys are in debt, too. Uh, George,
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what kind of a car have you?
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A Saxon.
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A what? A Saxon.
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A Saxon, huh? Well, that was my fault for bringing
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it up at all. Is it a new one, is it? Oh, yes,
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a very late model. I see. Well, you must have
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been in this country a long time now, haven't you, George?
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Yeah, say, by the way, Jack, what kind of a
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car have you?
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Me?
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I have a bicycle built for two. I mean, now,
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you can't go back any further than that.
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I think.
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Well, George, I think we ought to get started. What's
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the first number?
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I beg your pardon, mademoiselle. It's a French number, Jack.
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Do you like French numbers? Do I? Mon-duck, mon-duck.
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¶ ¶.
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I beg your pardon. I was out.
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Step in the garden, mademoiselle I'd like to tell.
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You, mademoiselle You're wonderful, you're marvelous In other words, you're
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close Lovely weather, mademoiselle Let's get together, mademoiselle You know
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I love you.
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But if you don't follow me through I beg your pardon, mademoiselle.
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Thank you.
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Thank you.
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George, that was swell. And I don't know, you look
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so important directing that orchestra. You know, with the baton
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in your hand... I don't know, there's something about all
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you fellas when you stand there waving that stick in
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the air. It's thrilling, you know. One thing I'd like
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to know, George, if the band didn't show up, what
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would you do with that stick?
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Why, I'd throw it away and do what you're doing.
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Always kidding. And now, ladies and gentlemen, may I present
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a young lady who is a star of many New
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York productions, Miss Ethel Chatea. You will remember Miss Chute
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best in Whoopi playing opposite Eddie Cantor. Is it all
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right for me to mention Cantor's name here? Everybody else does. Ethel,
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come over and say hello.
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Oh, hello.
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Wasn't that clever? Oh, she does a lot of things
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like that. You'd be surprised. And Miss Chute is going
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to sing for us. She has a beautiful voice, too.
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She has a sort of a nervous soprano. You know
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what I mean? In fact, last week she had her
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nose lifted so she could be heard in Philadelphia. And, oh,
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by the way, here's a little news for you, my interview.
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Miss Chute is really Mrs. George Olsen. Although I wouldn't
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go as far as to say that that's the reason
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she happens to be on this program.
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Nevertheless, she's Mrs.
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George Olsen. Such a nice girl, too. I'm surprised that
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she's married to Olsen. And now Miss Chute will sing
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I Found a Million Dollar Baby. I still feel a
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little Frenchy tonight, Ethel, so it's mon ducs to you, too.
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The End.
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Oh, my God.
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© BF-WATCH TV 2021.
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Dream of one You never know when it's going to
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say hello In a very unexpected way.
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For example Hate is hate.
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It was a lucky April shower It was the most
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convenient door He found a million dollar baby In a five.
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And ten cent.
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Store The rain continued for an hour I hung around
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for three or four Hung around a million dollar baby
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In a.
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Five and ten cent.
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Store She was selling china.
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When she made those eyes She could find China Until
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my voice got blind.
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And incidentally If you could run into a shower.
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© BF-WATCH TV 2021 © BF-WATCH TV 2021.
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I love my million-dollar baby From the five-a-champion store She
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was down.
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In China All in the night Little China, too hot
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Lookin' over five To the golden teacup And then the
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crowd got wild And incidentally If you would spend a
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happy hour Just at the Starlight Party store.
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And meet our million-dollar babies.
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Maybe one, maybe two, maybe three, maybe four And they're
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not from the 10th century.
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What a charming couple. And, uh, folks, I forgot to
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mention that Mr. Tay was assisted by Fran Fry. Of course,
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I'm lucky that I remember anything tonight. You know, folks,
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all the time Miss Shute was singing, I kept thinking
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of my girl. You know, I get so sentimental. I
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really have a girl. She lives in Newark, New Jersey.
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You know, the girl I go with when I'm in Newark.
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She's not what you'd call good-looking, exactly. In fact, she's
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quite homely, but then she can't stay in the house
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all the time. I imagine you folks have seen her
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pictures in different magazines. You know, she poses for the
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beauty ads entitled Before Takings. And she comes from a
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very fine family, although her father very often partakes of
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the forbidden beverage. It's all right for me to mention that,
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as they have no radio. In fact, her father drank
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everything in the United States and then went up north
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to drink Canada Dry. Boy, I'm glad I thought of that, Gil.
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You know the one about Canada Dry? I'm really supposed
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to mention it occasionally. After all, I owe it to
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my sponsors, and they might be listening in. Uh, seriously, though,
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do you realize, folks, that if you want a drink
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of Canada Dry, we'll say just a glass. You don't
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have to buy it in a bottle. You can walk
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into any drugstore or soda farm that has that big sign,
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Canada Dry made to order, ask for a glass and
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get it. I know you always have it in your
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home in bottles, but isn't it nice to know that
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you don't have to wait until you get home to
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drink it? Gee, I thought I did that pretty well
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for a new salesman, eh? I suppose nobody will drink
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it now.
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Hmm.
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And now, folks, a very stirring number called I Love
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a Parade with a vocal refrain by the messengers Fran Fry,
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Bobby Borger, and Bob Wright.
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I Love a Parade.
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Thank you.
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I love a parade.
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The tapping of feet, I love every beat I hear
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of a drum.
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I love a parade.
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When I hear a band, I just want to stand
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and cheer as they come. The sound of a thrill
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will give me a thrill. I thrill at the skill
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of anything military. I love a parade. I love a
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parade A handful of vets, a line of cadets, or
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any brigade For I love a parade I love to
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see the boys in blue and hear.
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Their heavy thread I used to love that Navy.
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Band with Sousa at its head.
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I love a stirring war parade, the best of all
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I feel. The biggest thrill when college boys come marching
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down the field. Thank you.
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That was I Love a Parade, ladies and gentlemen. The
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kind of a number that grips and thrills you, gives
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you that great feeling of patriotism, and makes you glad
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that you're an American. Personally, it didn't bother me very
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much because I took a nap while the boys were
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playing it. Now, folks, in case you've forgotten, this is
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Jack Benny again. You know, the Canada dry humorist. Say,
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I thought that was good. The Canada dry humorist. I
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made that up myself, huh?
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It sounds like it.
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That witty retort was by George Olsen, ladies and gentlemen,
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proving again that he is still an orchestra leader. At that,
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George has a great sense of humor. Say, he told
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me a story the other day. Do you mind if
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I tell it, George? I'll give you credit for it,
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you know. It's really supposed to be true, too. It's
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about George's uncle, who had been ill for a long time.
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He had what you call labor poisoning. You know what
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I mean? He just couldn't stand working. So his doctor
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finally told him that he would have to get a
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lot of fresh air, do outside work, but not lift
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anything heavy. He told him that at no time was
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he to lift anything heavy. So his uncle got a
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job as a garbage man in Scotland.
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Funny, I.
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Funny, you know, I never heard that one before, but
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the thing that kills me is Olsen telling a Scotch story.
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I mean, because George, you know, is no senseless himself.
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In fact, he invited me to dinner the other night,
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much to his own surprise, and he paid the check
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with a $ 5 bill that was in his pocket so
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long that Lincoln's eyes were bloodshot. That's a fact. However,
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he will now favor us with that very popular song
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hit called Paradise. After all, why should his orchestra be
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an exception?
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© BF-WATCH TV 2021 Thank you. Thank you.
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THE END Thank you.
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Thank you.
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This is George Olsen speaking.
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And by this time, I know you're thoroughly bored listening
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to Jack Denver, well, our master ceremonies and his alleged
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Canada Dry humor and telling you all about made-to-order Canada Dry.
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We also have a product to sell.
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It's music. And may we show you now just how
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we make music. Listen, everyone, we're.
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Going to show you how we all make.
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Music.
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Now, first there's Wally. He sure plays some with two
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little six-inch-eats on his drum. And that's how we make music.
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Now we have the boys with their violins. Their bows
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go back and forth when they hit the entrance.
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End.
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And the drums. Now the trumpets play loud and shrill,
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but when they get going, they'll give you a thrill.
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And the violins and the drums. The old trombone flies
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up and down. When he gets hot, he goes to town.
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And the trumpet, and the violin.
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And the drum.
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When we want a.
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Shiver, a quiver, or a groan, we call upon the
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boys with the saxophone. And the trombone, and the trumpet,
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and the violin, and the drum. Please, please, now, when
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we want some rhythm, where do we go?
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Why, it's old Bob Rice and his old banjo.
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And the saxophone and the trombone, the trumpet, the violin,
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and the drum. Oh, the cow is now a little birdie.
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All righty.
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Now the next old fella can't be beat.
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You know him well.
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It's Piccolo Pete.
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And the banjo and the saxophone, the trombone, the trumpet,
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the violin, and the drum.
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Okay, Ben Burnie, if you like it.
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That's it.
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Now we have the piano for cadences and such. All
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he needs is a very light touch. And the piccolo,
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and the banjo, and the saxophone, and the trombone, and
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the trumpet, and the violin, and the drums.
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So are you, so are you.
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Now, the old bass fiddle plays way down low. He
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has to get a derrick.
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To move his bow.
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And the piano, and the piccolo, and the banjo, and
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the saxophone, and the trombone, the trumpet, the violin, and
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the drum.
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Hey, please.
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Bass, piano, piccolo, banjo, saxophone, trombone, trumpet, violin. Now that's
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how we make music.
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That was cute, George. I mean, babies will like it anyway.
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And, um.
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That, ladies and gentlemen, is the way these boys make music. Now,
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if they could only play it.
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Mr.
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Olsen will now play Come West, Little Girl, Come West.
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And I'm supposed to sing a chorus of this number.
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And you know, folks, that six months ago, I couldn't
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sing a note. Really, I could not sing a note.
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But after taking three glasses every day of Canada Dry
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made to order ginger ale, I still am unable to
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sing and can't even sign a note. So the moral
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of this is drink that champagne of ginger ale, Canada dry,
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and don't worry about signing notes. So for want of
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a better soloist, Miss Chute will sing, Come west, little girl,
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come west. I'm going east.
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I love to hear a cowboy sing like a cowboy
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sings when he's blue.
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Around the campfire, on the rain, when his early work
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is through.
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If I could hear a certain love song, what memories
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it would bring. I can't forget that love song the.
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Cowboys used to sing.
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The sun will set, the moon will rise, but I
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want to look in my baby's eyes.
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Come west, little girl.
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Come west. The breeze will blow, the stars will beam.
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But I'm too lonesome to go to sleep Come west,
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little girl Come west Oh, don't.
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Be pining away, way.
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Down here You know my love is for you will increase.
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I love the West.
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It's full of charm. But I rest best in my
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baby's arms. Come West, little girl.
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Come West.
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The sun will set, the moon will rise, but I'm
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gonna look in my baby's eyes.
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Come west, little girl, come west. The breeze will blow,
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the stars will see, but I'm too lonesome to go
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to sleep.
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Come west, little girl, come west.
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So don't be finin' away, way down here.
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You know my love's here for you, willin' please I
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love the way people are done But I live best
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in my baby's.
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Arms Come west, little girl.
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Hello, everybody.
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This is Kate Smith, or Jack Benny, talking. You see
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how nervous I am? I mean, not so much because
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I'm broadcasting, but I think all my relatives are listening in,
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and I don't want them to know that I'm working.
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Although I have an older brother that I'm quite fond of.
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I mean, we get along great. We sort of share
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everything together. I mean, what's mine is his, and what's
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his is his, you know. Although this has absolutely nothing
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to do with Canada Dry made to order, I keep
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getting entirely off the subject. But don't forget, folks, that
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you can walk into your neighborhood drugstore, or any drugstore.
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I mean, after all, I don't care what drugstore you
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walk into. I'm just the master of ceremonies here, that's all.
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I mean, if I'm going to have to worry about
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things like that, you know, I'll have my hands full.
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But go into any drugstore and order a glass, mind you.
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Not a bottle, but a glass of made-to-order Canada Dry
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ginger ale and stagger out. Isn't it funny, there's things
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you can buy today in a drugstore. I went in
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for an aspirin the other day and came out with
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a new hat. I imagine the next number will be
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by George Olsen. He's about to make his first appearance
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on this program. In fact, I'm lucky to get him
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here at all. This is called Drums in My Heart.
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And boys, try and finish this all together if you can.
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THE END.
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Thank you.
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00:27:16.160 --> 00:27:44.319
Thank you. Thank you.
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00:28:02.150 --> 00:28:02.750
Thank you.
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THE END.
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That, ladies and gentlemen, was the last number on our
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first program on the 2nd of May. Are you sleeping?
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I hope you'll be with us again Wednesday. In fact,
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I hope I'll be here Wednesday. George, we all hope
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that we'll be here Wednesday. Well, good night then.
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All aboard.
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Away we go.
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Get that little lady on the train, boys.
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All aboard.
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Thank you.
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Ladies and gentlemen, we are concluding the first program in
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a new series sponsored by Canada Dry.
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00:30:09.710 --> 00:30:10.849
The ginger ale now.
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Available made to order at drugstores and soda fountains as
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well as in bottles. Canada Dry has presented Jack Benny.
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00:30:18.490 --> 00:30:21.900
Ethel Chute and George Olsen and his music. The same
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group of artists will be with you at this time
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Wednesday evening. Drums in My Heart from through the years
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was played tonight with the special permission of the copyright owner.
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This is the National Broadcasting Company.
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WJZ New York.
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We close with the Jack Benny Program, JB1932, 0502 First Show.
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00:30:53.869 --> 00:30:56.809
Good night, and thank you for joining us. Follow Old
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00:30:56.869 --> 00:31:00.230
Time Comedy Radio for more classic comedy broadcasts.
1
00:00:00.210 --> 00:00:03.649
From the roof garden of New York's New Amsterdam Theatre,
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00:00:04.009 --> 00:00:07.379
a new master of ceremonies steps to the microphone for
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00:00:07.419 --> 00:00:13.800
a Canada Dry musical program. On May 2nd, 1932, Jack
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00:00:13.839 --> 00:00:18.850
Benny made his first paid professional radio appearance, introducing George
5
00:00:18.969 --> 00:00:22.410
Olsen and his orchestra with Ethel Shutter and other vocalists.
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00:00:23.359 --> 00:00:29.230
This is episode one of the Jack Benny Program, JB1932-05-02
7
00:00:30.289 --> 00:00:34.969
First Show, heard over NBC's Blue Network from WJZ in
8
00:00:35.030 --> 00:00:39.469
New York. Between the music and sponsor messages, Benny offers
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00:00:39.509 --> 00:00:43.380
the comic remarks that would soon become familiar to radio audiences.
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We now take you back to the original broadcast.
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Thank you.
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Tonight, Canada Dry, the campaign of ginger ales, presents a
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series of programs to advertise the new made-to-order Canada Dry,
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which you can now buy by the glass at drugstores
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and soda fountains. This series will feature George Olsen and
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his music, Miss Ethel Chute, the star of many Broadway successes,
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and that suave comedian, dry humorist, and famous master of ceremonies,
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Jack Benny.
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Thank you, Mr. Thorgerson. That's pretty good from a man
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who doesn't even know me. Ladies and gentlemen, this is
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Jack Benny talking and making my first appearance on the
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air professionally. By that I mean I'm finally getting paid,
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which of course will be a great relief to my creditors.
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I really don't know why I'm here. I'm supposed to
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be a sort of a master of ceremonies and tell
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you all the things that will happen, which would happen anyway.
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I must introduce the different artists who could easily introduce themselves.
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and also talk about the Canada Dry made to order
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by the glass, which is a waste of time, as
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you know all about it. You drink it like it
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and don't want to hear about it. So, ladies and gentlemen,
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a master of ceremonies is really a fellow who is
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unemployed and gets paid for it. I think you will
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like the entertainment arranged for tonight, I hope. Of course,
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I haven't seen any of the program myself, but I've
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spoken to the artists individually. They seem to think it's
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awfully good. The first number will be a selection by
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00:02:44.500 --> 00:02:48.419
George Olsen and his orchestra. I think this, being our
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00:02:48.460 --> 00:02:51.080
first program together, it is no more than fair that
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I have you meet Mr. Olsen personally. He's really a
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00:02:53.900 --> 00:02:56.939
very charming fellow and one of the few directors who
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comes to and from his work on roller skates. That's
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perhaps the silliest thing that I'll say all night, I think.
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I might add that Mr. Olsen is very, very handsome.
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I told you, George, I'd get that in there. But
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00:03:09.979 --> 00:03:11.620
as long as we are both on the air, of course,
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I won't have to worry about that. Oh, George, come here.
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I want you to say hello to the folks.
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Hello, everybody.
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That was George Olsen, ladies and gentlemen. He rehearsed that
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speech all week. You know, this is really all play
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with George. He doesn't have to work at all. I
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might say that Mr. Olsen is one of the wealthiest
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conductors in America. You know what I mean. He owns
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his own car. Of course, the other boys are in debt, too. Uh, George,
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what kind of a car have you?
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A Saxon.
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A what? A Saxon.
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A Saxon, huh? Well, that was my fault for bringing
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it up at all. Is it a new one, is it? Oh, yes,
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a very late model. I see. Well, you must have
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been in this country a long time now, haven't you, George?
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Yeah, say, by the way, Jack, what kind of a
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car have you?
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Me?
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I have a bicycle built for two. I mean, now,
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you can't go back any further than that.
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I think.
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Well, George, I think we ought to get started. What's
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the first number?
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I beg your pardon, mademoiselle. It's a French number, Jack.
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Do you like French numbers? Do I? Mon-duck, mon-duck.
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¶ ¶.
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I beg your pardon. I was out.
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Step in the garden, mademoiselle I'd like to tell.
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You, mademoiselle You're wonderful, you're marvelous In other words, you're
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close Lovely weather, mademoiselle Let's get together, mademoiselle You know
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I love you.
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But if you don't follow me through I beg your pardon, mademoiselle.
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Thank you.
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Thank you.
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George, that was swell. And I don't know, you look
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so important directing that orchestra. You know, with the baton
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in your hand... I don't know, there's something about all
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you fellas when you stand there waving that stick in
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the air. It's thrilling, you know. One thing I'd like
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to know, George, if the band didn't show up, what
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would you do with that stick?
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Why, I'd throw it away and do what you're doing.
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Always kidding. And now, ladies and gentlemen, may I present
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a young lady who is a star of many New
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York productions, Miss Ethel Chatea. You will remember Miss Chute
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best in Whoopi playing opposite Eddie Cantor. Is it all
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right for me to mention Cantor's name here? Everybody else does. Ethel,
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come over and say hello.
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Oh, hello.
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Wasn't that clever? Oh, she does a lot of things
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like that. You'd be surprised. And Miss Chute is going
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to sing for us. She has a beautiful voice, too.
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She has a sort of a nervous soprano. You know
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what I mean? In fact, last week she had her
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nose lifted so she could be heard in Philadelphia. And, oh,
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by the way, here's a little news for you, my interview.
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Miss Chute is really Mrs. George Olsen. Although I wouldn't
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go as far as to say that that's the reason
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she happens to be on this program.
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Nevertheless, she's Mrs.
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George Olsen. Such a nice girl, too. I'm surprised that
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she's married to Olsen. And now Miss Chute will sing
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I Found a Million Dollar Baby. I still feel a
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little Frenchy tonight, Ethel, so it's mon ducs to you, too.
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The End.
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Oh, my God.
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© BF-WATCH TV 2021.
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Dream of one You never know when it's going to
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say hello In a very unexpected way.
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For example Hate is hate.
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It was a lucky April shower It was the most
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convenient door He found a million dollar baby In a five.
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And ten cent.
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Store The rain continued for an hour I hung around
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for three or four Hung around a million dollar baby
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In a.
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Five and ten cent.
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Store She was selling china.
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When she made those eyes She could find China Until
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my voice got blind.
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And incidentally If you could run into a shower.
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© BF-WATCH TV 2021 © BF-WATCH TV 2021.
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I love my million-dollar baby From the five-a-champion store She
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was down.
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In China All in the night Little China, too hot
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Lookin' over five To the golden teacup And then the
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crowd got wild And incidentally If you would spend a
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happy hour Just at the Starlight Party store.
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And meet our million-dollar babies.
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Maybe one, maybe two, maybe three, maybe four And they're
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not from the 10th century.
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What a charming couple. And, uh, folks, I forgot to
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mention that Mr. Tay was assisted by Fran Fry. Of course,
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I'm lucky that I remember anything tonight. You know, folks,
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all the time Miss Shute was singing, I kept thinking
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of my girl. You know, I get so sentimental. I
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really have a girl. She lives in Newark, New Jersey.
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You know, the girl I go with when I'm in Newark.
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She's not what you'd call good-looking, exactly. In fact, she's
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quite homely, but then she can't stay in the house
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all the time. I imagine you folks have seen her
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pictures in different magazines. You know, she poses for the
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beauty ads entitled Before Takings. And she comes from a
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very fine family, although her father very often partakes of
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the forbidden beverage. It's all right for me to mention that,
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as they have no radio. In fact, her father drank
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everything in the United States and then went up north
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to drink Canada Dry. Boy, I'm glad I thought of that, Gil.
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You know the one about Canada Dry? I'm really supposed
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to mention it occasionally. After all, I owe it to
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my sponsors, and they might be listening in. Uh, seriously, though,
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do you realize, folks, that if you want a drink
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of Canada Dry, we'll say just a glass. You don't
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have to buy it in a bottle. You can walk
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into any drugstore or soda farm that has that big sign,
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Canada Dry made to order, ask for a glass and
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get it. I know you always have it in your
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home in bottles, but isn't it nice to know that
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you don't have to wait until you get home to
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drink it? Gee, I thought I did that pretty well
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for a new salesman, eh? I suppose nobody will drink
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it now.
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Hmm.
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And now, folks, a very stirring number called I Love
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a Parade with a vocal refrain by the messengers Fran Fry,
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Bobby Borger, and Bob Wright.
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I Love a Parade.
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Thank you.
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I love a parade.
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The tapping of feet, I love every beat I hear
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of a drum.
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I love a parade.
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When I hear a band, I just want to stand
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and cheer as they come. The sound of a thrill
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will give me a thrill. I thrill at the skill
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of anything military. I love a parade. I love a
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parade A handful of vets, a line of cadets, or
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any brigade For I love a parade I love to
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see the boys in blue and hear.
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Their heavy thread I used to love that Navy.
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Band with Sousa at its head.
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I love a stirring war parade, the best of all
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I feel. The biggest thrill when college boys come marching
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down the field. Thank you.
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That was I Love a Parade, ladies and gentlemen. The
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kind of a number that grips and thrills you, gives
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you that great feeling of patriotism, and makes you glad
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that you're an American. Personally, it didn't bother me very
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much because I took a nap while the boys were
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playing it. Now, folks, in case you've forgotten, this is
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Jack Benny again. You know, the Canada dry humorist. Say,
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I thought that was good. The Canada dry humorist. I
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made that up myself, huh?
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It sounds like it.
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That witty retort was by George Olsen, ladies and gentlemen,
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proving again that he is still an orchestra leader. At that,
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George has a great sense of humor. Say, he told
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me a story the other day. Do you mind if
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I tell it, George? I'll give you credit for it,
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you know. It's really supposed to be true, too. It's
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about George's uncle, who had been ill for a long time.
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He had what you call labor poisoning. You know what
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I mean? He just couldn't stand working. So his doctor
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finally told him that he would have to get a
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lot of fresh air, do outside work, but not lift
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anything heavy. He told him that at no time was
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he to lift anything heavy. So his uncle got a
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job as a garbage man in Scotland.
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Funny, I.
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Funny, you know, I never heard that one before, but
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the thing that kills me is Olsen telling a Scotch story.
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I mean, because George, you know, is no senseless himself.
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In fact, he invited me to dinner the other night,
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much to his own surprise, and he paid the check
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with a $ 5 bill that was in his pocket so
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long that Lincoln's eyes were bloodshot. That's a fact. However,
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he will now favor us with that very popular song
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hit called Paradise. After all, why should his orchestra be
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an exception?
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© BF-WATCH TV 2021 Thank you. Thank you.
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THE END Thank you.
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Thank you.
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This is George Olsen speaking.
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And by this time, I know you're thoroughly bored listening
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to Jack Denver, well, our master ceremonies and his alleged
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Canada Dry humor and telling you all about made-to-order Canada Dry.
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We also have a product to sell.
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It's music. And may we show you now just how
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we make music. Listen, everyone, we're.
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Going to show you how we all make.
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Music.
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Now, first there's Wally. He sure plays some with two
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little six-inch-eats on his drum. And that's how we make music.
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Now we have the boys with their violins. Their bows
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go back and forth when they hit the entrance.
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End.
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And the drums. Now the trumpets play loud and shrill,
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but when they get going, they'll give you a thrill.
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And the violins and the drums. The old trombone flies
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up and down. When he gets hot, he goes to town.
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And the trumpet, and the violin.
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And the drum.
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When we want a.
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Shiver, a quiver, or a groan, we call upon the
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boys with the saxophone. And the trombone, and the trumpet,
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and the violin, and the drum. Please, please, now, when
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we want some rhythm, where do we go?
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Why, it's old Bob Rice and his old banjo.
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And the saxophone and the trombone, the trumpet, the violin,
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and the drum. Oh, the cow is now a little birdie.
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All righty.
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Now the next old fella can't be beat.
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You know him well.
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It's Piccolo Pete.
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And the banjo and the saxophone, the trombone, the trumpet,
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the violin, and the drum.
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Okay, Ben Burnie, if you like it.
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That's it.
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Now we have the piano for cadences and such. All
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he needs is a very light touch. And the piccolo,
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and the banjo, and the saxophone, and the trombone, and
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the trumpet, and the violin, and the drums.
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So are you, so are you.
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Now, the old bass fiddle plays way down low. He
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has to get a derrick.
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To move his bow.
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And the piano, and the piccolo, and the banjo, and
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the saxophone, and the trombone, the trumpet, the violin, and
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the drum.
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Hey, please.
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Bass, piano, piccolo, banjo, saxophone, trombone, trumpet, violin. Now that's
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how we make music.
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That was cute, George. I mean, babies will like it anyway.
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And, um.
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That, ladies and gentlemen, is the way these boys make music. Now,
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if they could only play it.
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Mr.
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Olsen will now play Come West, Little Girl, Come West.
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And I'm supposed to sing a chorus of this number.
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And you know, folks, that six months ago, I couldn't
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sing a note. Really, I could not sing a note.
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But after taking three glasses every day of Canada Dry
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made to order ginger ale, I still am unable to
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sing and can't even sign a note. So the moral
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of this is drink that champagne of ginger ale, Canada dry,
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and don't worry about signing notes. So for want of
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a better soloist, Miss Chute will sing, Come west, little girl,
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come west. I'm going east.
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I love to hear a cowboy sing like a cowboy
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sings when he's blue.
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Around the campfire, on the rain, when his early work
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is through.
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If I could hear a certain love song, what memories
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it would bring. I can't forget that love song the.
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Cowboys used to sing.
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The sun will set, the moon will rise, but I
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want to look in my baby's eyes.
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Come west, little girl.
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Come west. The breeze will blow, the stars will beam.
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But I'm too lonesome to go to sleep Come west,
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little girl Come west Oh, don't.
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Be pining away, way.
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Down here You know my love is for you will increase.
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I love the West.
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It's full of charm. But I rest best in my
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baby's arms. Come West, little girl.
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Come West.
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The sun will set, the moon will rise, but I'm
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gonna look in my baby's eyes.
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Come west, little girl, come west. The breeze will blow,
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the stars will see, but I'm too lonesome to go
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to sleep.
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Come west, little girl, come west.
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So don't be finin' away, way down here.
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You know my love's here for you, willin' please I
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love the way people are done But I live best
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in my baby's.
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Arms Come west, little girl.
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Hello, everybody.
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This is Kate Smith, or Jack Benny, talking. You see
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how nervous I am? I mean, not so much because
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I'm broadcasting, but I think all my relatives are listening in,
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and I don't want them to know that I'm working.
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Although I have an older brother that I'm quite fond of.
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I mean, we get along great. We sort of share
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everything together. I mean, what's mine is his, and what's
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his is his, you know. Although this has absolutely nothing
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to do with Canada Dry made to order, I keep
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getting entirely off the subject. But don't forget, folks, that
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you can walk into your neighborhood drugstore, or any drugstore.
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I mean, after all, I don't care what drugstore you
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walk into. I'm just the master of ceremonies here, that's all.
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I mean, if I'm going to have to worry about
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things like that, you know, I'll have my hands full.
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But go into any drugstore and order a glass, mind you.
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Not a bottle, but a glass of made-to-order Canada Dry
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ginger ale and stagger out. Isn't it funny, there's things
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you can buy today in a drugstore. I went in
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for an aspirin the other day and came out with
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a new hat. I imagine the next number will be
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by George Olsen. He's about to make his first appearance
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on this program. In fact, I'm lucky to get him
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here at all. This is called Drums in My Heart.
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And boys, try and finish this all together if you can.
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THE END.
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Thank you.
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Thank you. Thank you.
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Thank you.
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THE END.
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That, ladies and gentlemen, was the last number on our
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first program on the 2nd of May. Are you sleeping?
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I hope you'll be with us again Wednesday. In fact,
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I hope I'll be here Wednesday. George, we all hope
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that we'll be here Wednesday. Well, good night then.
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All aboard.
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Away we go.
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Get that little lady on the train, boys.
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All aboard.
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Thank you.
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Ladies and gentlemen, we are concluding the first program in
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a new series sponsored by Canada Dry.
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The ginger ale now.
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Available made to order at drugstores and soda fountains as
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well as in bottles. Canada Dry has presented Jack Benny.
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Ethel Chute and George Olsen and his music. The same
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group of artists will be with you at this time
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Wednesday evening. Drums in My Heart from through the years
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was played tonight with the special permission of the copyright owner.
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This is the National Broadcasting Company.
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WJZ New York.
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We close with the Jack Benny Program, JB1932, 0502 First Show.
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Good night, and thank you for joining us. Follow Old
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Time Comedy Radio for more classic comedy broadcasts.
