WEBVTT
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Hi guys, welcome back to the show.
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If you are new here, this podcast is a collection of visual and audio existential crisis thoughts from a chemically imbalanced black girl who is me and my name is Zarya.
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I'm very excited to be recording this episode, guys.
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I was looking through my notes and I was like, damn, what the fuck am I gonna talk about?
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Because I'm trying to put out two episodes a week.
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One video, one audio.
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It's not my fault though, because YouTube takes four fucking ever to I thought I turned off my mic.
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YouTube takes forever to upload a video episode.
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I don't know what I'm doing wrong.
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I don't know.
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I'm doing this all by myself.
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Apparently, I'm doing it in a fucked up way.
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So if you guys don't get a video episode, I'm trying to at least give you two audio episodes.
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And I really gotta stick by that because let me tell you about my job.
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Before we even get into the topics, y'all, I'm so tired of clocking in.
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Let's just chat for a second, right?
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Bestie to bestie, FaceTime call.
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Cool.
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Also, freshly smoked, just hopped off a blunt, made a frozen margarita.
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I'm feeling really good, okay?
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It's gonna be a great episode.
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I don't really even know if it is, but we'll see.
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Um, I'm so tired of clocking in, and I love, love helping animals, love saving animals, love it down.
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But like, can I also be honest?
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So if you don't know, like if you work in vet medicine, like vet tech, vet assistant, any kennelist kennel tech, like if you work in vet medicine at all, bitch a receptionist, can I ask a question?
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Why is vet medicine and like barista, why are those employees so similar?
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I will be everybody asked, go sit down.
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Sorry, just can't witness me pop my child, but they almost knocked my shit over.
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But seriously, vet medicine and like baristas, like coffee house cafe type workers, very similar.
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They them all the way fucking down.
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Like there is no vet hospital.
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I'm I'm willing, I'm willing to put money on it.
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I'm willing to bet a thousand.
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You can walk into any vet hospital, you'll see green hair, fucking necktat sleeves, fucking you'll see all types of piercings, bitch.
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You'll smell all types of smells, and then no shade.
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Mind you, this is no shade.
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I'm I'm one of the they vems, bitch.
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I am one of the they thems.
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But it's it just gets so exhausting at some point because it's just like, why are we working in canary?
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I'm about to beat the fuck out of my kids.
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I feel like every time, I feel like they know that I'm recording.
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Because now you guys are going unpunishment.
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Get get in the goddamn room, go in the room, go in the room.
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Every time you guys are asleep all day, and then when mommy picks up the damn camera, it's like we want to go to World War III, and I don't get it.
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Okay, but yeah, so it gets very overwhelming sometimes working around that specific group of people because it's like, babe, why are we working in ER, vet medicine ER, mind you, and you're easily overwhelmed.
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Why are we working overnight, 24-hour ER vet, and you don't have a good sleeping schedule?
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Or you get like high anxiety when anything like alarming happens, or like you know what I'm saying?
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Like, why did we choose the most hustle and bustle like job if hustle and bustle make you nervous?
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I don't know.
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I don't know, guys.
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I'm really, and that's the thing that's really making me want to like lock in, lock down on the uploads and like putting clips out on TikTok and stuff like that, because I don't want to clock in more than I want people to see me.
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You know what I'm saying?
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Because I I always get in this thing, it's like, well, I don't want the podcast to go too viral, you know what I'm saying?
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Girl, it can go as viral as it wanna be.
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As long as I don't gotta push clock in anymore, anybody can see this motherfucking podcast, okay?
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I you know that thing where they say for like what four billion dollars, your family has to watch your whole life from start to finish.
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That has never that has never been an issue with me.
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Watch it.
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Put 3D glasses on while you watch it, because half of what it is is gonna be all motherfuckers fucking with me, okay?
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Let's let's watch it together, let's hold hands while we watch it, okay?
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Girl, no, I couldn't.
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I can't.
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I'm so tired of fucking clocking in.
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I get it.
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I get why people like you know when you hear stories about people dropping they whole shit moving to Cali with$2,000.
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Although I would never do that, I do understand it, because this shit but for birds.
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I don't know who, I don't know what type, but it is.
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Um it's like I like my job, like I like what I do for work.
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But like I can't just do that without the people.
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And even when I was a flight attendant, like I loved I don't I don't know if I loved working the flights.
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I don't know if I like that because like that that was just the people.
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I don't know if I love that, but I like traveling and stuff like that.
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It's just like when you have to deal with people and you're serving them of any type, it's just it's just like bitch, I gotta find a skill.
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Like, I'm over here, I'm checking my body for like a third nipple or some shit.
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Like, girl, what can get the crowd rocking?
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Like, I I I cannot clock in, guys.
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I cannot, I cannot clock in anymore.
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Like, after 30, I'm gonna start breaking my bones live on the internet because like I don't know, this shit is really for the birds, and I know that's kind of hypocritical because I'm always the type of person that's like like clout chasing and like hype beast and all that shit, like doing shit for the internet has always like rubbed me the wrong way.
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But like for the money, I get it, I do get it for the money.
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I do get it for the money for clout and just to have people talking about you and shit like that.
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I don't understand that.
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But like doing shit that you know is guaranteed revenue, I'll shut the fuck up.
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I'ma judge you a little bit.
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But after I do my pocket watching, I'm gonna be like, oh okay, okay, what can I say?
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You know what I'm saying?
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I bitch just got off the clock.
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Um, so yeah, speaking of on the clock, let's violently change subjects.
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I was talking to a homeboy of mine who just does not believe like my whole thing with dating.
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If you don't know, bitch, if this is the first time you ever click on this podcast, you don't know a bitch.
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I am very like too comfortable with being alone in romantic and platonic um situations.
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Like, I just for my mental health plural, like I just need to be alone more than your average human, right?
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And that's gotten me in some trouble with my family, friends, love life, whatever.
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But it's it's a ness it's a necessity for me because I don't like to have my like crash outs or mental breakdowns in front of people.
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So like I need to be alone for multiple days at a time.
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That way I can have those emotions in peace, and then I come back out like, what's up, bitches?
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Freshly off a Minty B.
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So um, and so because I'm in that era of my life, I just don't think dating is a good idea because like I don't want to be in the middle of a I'm in here like losing my fucking mind, and like my nigga or my bitch is like, Hey, where you at?
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We were supposed to go to dinner.
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Bitch, I have a knife in my throat, and you think I care about steak?
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I'm about to jump out the window.
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You think I care about scallops?
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Fuck dinner.
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Fuck you, fuck me.
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Everybody, everybody's gonna die.
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You know what I'm saying?
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So it's just like I I just feel like because I need to, because I haven't found another remedy for how I am outside of medicine, because I'm just not gonna be that type of bitch.
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I wish I would have a regular emotion and somebody say, Oh, you didn't take your medicine.
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But y'all, I'll air the whole crib out.
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So it's just like I don't want to take medicine because I can't, I don't want to have natural reactions to shit, and people like that bitch ain't pop a pill today.
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Like, fuck a pill, fuck a pill.
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I can't do it.
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So me taking three, four days by myself is kind of like my Zoloft, you know, that's my trash don't.
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I just need to be in this bitch by myself so I can do, you know, so forget.
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Um, but my homeboy does understand that he's like, well, if you found the right person to make you not need that, then you know that'll be good.
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And I'm just like, why do people get so I don't even know how to describe that, like some shit doesn't need to involve another person, you know what I'm saying?
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And that be scaring me, low-key, about people who need other people.
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Did y'all see that post on TikTok where the girl was like, I think I get so easily enraged by people who need their handheld through everything in life or need a buddy through everything in life because I was so violently forced to be independent at such a young age.
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That is me, because it's just like, what do you mean if I meet a person that don't make me feel like I need to be alone?
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Bitch, I'ma still need to be alone because that person is near me.
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Like, I don't understand.
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Um, and I think it's just people overvaluing like their place in somebody's life, and not even their place as in like them, but like overvaluing like human presence at certain times, you know.
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When there said there's a time and a place, there's there's literally a time and a place to be with other people, like and I I get that a lot.
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Like, people are like, Well, how can you just do everything alone?
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Because like I'm still a person, like if you think that I'm not by myself when I'm alone, you got another thing coming.
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Cause it's a it's 38 bitches in here that are just like one's tap dancing, the other one's screaming, the other one's trying to like drown in the other.
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You know what I'm saying?
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It's 38 bitches in here that I am constantly just like shh shh, huh?
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What bitch?
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Okay, okay, you know, like so I know that made me sound so crazy, but it's just like there are some people who just are so okay with being alone, and I think that freaks some people out, like, because I'll have people asking me, like, oh well, would you do this or that and rather be alone?
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And like, my answer is always just like I would there that you you the anxiety about certain situations and the fear in certain situations only pop up for me when there's another person involved.
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I could be fucked as long as the day is long, I could be in such a bad situation for myself personally, and like it won't make me feel any type of way because I'm like, I know I can get myself out of it.
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As soon as you attach me, this situation to somebody else, I'm immediately freaking the fuck out.
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I'm actually about to cry.
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I'm already crying, it's okay.
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So that was something I just found interesting because I don't know.
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I've always been kind of just to myself, I guess, but I never really looked at it as a bad thing, and I think the older I get, the more people are starting to like uh, you know, people are starting to like feel bad.
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Like when I was younger, even about having kids, like people always say, like, oh, we'll wait till you find the right man.
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Like, if if the person is trying to change my mind about the way I feel, then that's that's that's me getting got.
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That's me letting somebody else fuck with the way I know I feel.
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That's not right, you know what I'm saying?
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Like, they need to be able to understand how I feel and leave me to do it, or they need to feel the exact same way and we just process and flow through each other because we know exactly how the other feels.
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But I'm not in the market for tweaking how the fuck I genuinely feel and think just to be in the presence of another motherfucker.
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That is not cute to me.
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I'm so sorry.
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I'm mm-mm won't do it.
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I'm so sorry, but um let's get to the other topics.
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Um speaking of on the clock, this is the this is the point I was trying to wrap up with um my homeboy because one thing I hate about being in relationships with men and women, and this is why I'll be alone for the foreseeable future, is because I don't like to feel like my pussy is on the clock.
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You know what I'm saying?
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Like, over sexually men, over sexual women, that shit be making me uncomfortable, and like I'm I'm just gonna say something like because I've had this experience with a woman, it gives like it's teetering, like you got a real sad sexual history, you know what I'm saying?
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Y'all know what I'm trying to say.
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All the lesbians and bisexuals, y'all get what I'm trying to say.
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And for a man, it's just like anything a man do that I find weird is just predatory, you know what I'm saying?
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Because I'm just like, why do you want to fuck 24-7?
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You know what I'm saying?
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Like, get the fuck off of me.
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I hate feeling like my pussy on the clock.
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I hate feeling like my pussy on the clock.
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I really do, I really do, I really do, I really do.
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And like, I remember I used to date this girl.
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Oh my gosh, she would get irritated if I didn't like bust her down, like irritated, and I'm not gonna lie, she had some unfortunate experiences with sex in her younger years.
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But I'm not gonna lie, that that that that was also pissing me off because why am I fucking the trauma out of you?
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You need to go to therapy.
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We need to go to therapy, bitch, because now I'm traumatized.
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Like, I don't like I don't like how hypersexual a lot of people are, and and and usually it's because of some fucked up shit that happened to them.
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Not all the time, not all the time, just in my experience, bitch.
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Some people just have sex addictions, and you can't really do anything about that.
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But um, in my experience with men and women, it has usually stemmed from some type of inappropriacy, and it's just like I can't do that for you.
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I can't, I can't, I can't because I can't.
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So me being alone is perfect, you know what I'm saying?
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If if I was like overly freaked out, if I was younger and I wanted to pop pussy like, you know, a movie theater, but I'm not there yet.
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I'm uh nor have I ever been, you know what I'm saying?
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And nor will I be because I don't know.
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I was about to say something so wild.
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I'm about to say this coochie is a grandma, but she not, she not, she not a grandma.
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Okay, she is a very let's change the subject, okay?
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I don't wanna I don't wanna um member of the family my vagina because I was about to say she is a really um she is a very respectable auntie, okay?
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Very nice auntie, okay?
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I don't know.
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Let's just forget I said that.
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I'm not gonna edit it out either.
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I'm gonna you guys are gonna remember that I called my vagina an auntie.
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Um also what else did I want to talk to you guys about?
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Oh my gosh, I do want to talk to you guys about the ending of Euphoria.
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The third season.
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Girl, I should've listened to y'all.
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I should have listened to y'all because I saw the comments and shit like that were like this season should have just been an email, bitch.
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I should have listened.
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Bitch, the third season of Euphoria pissed me clean off.
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And it pissed me off because there were so many characters that weren't in the season that were replaced by characters that for damn sure should not have been in this season.
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And it made me feel bad for Nate's dad because it just looked like he was hurting the whole time.
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I was like, he could have had a phone call scene, you know what I'm saying?
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From his character in the first two seasons to that, it was just hard to watch, you know what I'm saying?
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Rest in peace, because goddamn.
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Umules, I don't know.
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It looked like Jules was off of Bean the whole episode.
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I mean, her every episode, her mouth was just sliding the fuck off.
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I don't know what was going on.
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Like her storyline was stupid.
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You just fucking a rich nigga, like, okay.
00:18:54.319 --> 00:18:56.079
We also could have found that out through email.
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You know what I'm saying?
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Like, for her to be in the entire season did not make any sense.
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Her rude didn't fuck, like, there was no like relationship.
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There was nothing.
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There was nothing.
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You know what actually pissed me off?
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Let's talk about it.
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This is really why I brought it up.
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The actual real thing that pisses me off about that pissed me off about the third season of Euphoria is that there's a trope in Lexi that I fucking hate when it comes to movies and TV shows.
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Because Lexi had this very hard standpoint at the beginning of the season about Christians, about religion in general.
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Very valid points.
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They're judgmental, da da da.
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Damn near kick Rue out for Rue.
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Rue had one epiphany, and Lexi was like, bitch, you're gonna have to get the fuck up out of here with that.
00:19:41.599 --> 00:19:43.519
I don't I don't like all that shit, right?
00:19:44.960 --> 00:19:53.920
Only then to when Rue died, Lexi picks up the Bible and is like, oh, it's actually like beautiful and fascinating.
00:19:54.079 --> 00:20:01.039
But it only became beautiful and fascinating because she needed something to make her not feel guilty about how she left things with Rue.
00:20:01.440 --> 00:20:05.359
Further proving that that shit is just a coping mechanism.
00:20:05.599 --> 00:20:27.680
And if this book or any organized religion or higher being can make you feel like you're justified and what you did, and can't nobody judge you, and this shit really don't matter because it's all up to God, then of course you're gonna lean into that because you don't want to spend the rest of your life feeling bad that you didn't cuss this bitch out and and and said that she was off three beans when she really wasn't, and the next time you heard of her, she was dead.
00:20:27.839 --> 00:20:29.920
You don't want to go through the rest of your life feeling like that.
00:20:30.079 --> 00:20:33.359
So you picked up this book, it was like nothing's my fault.
00:20:34.240 --> 00:20:35.279
Okay, I love it.
00:20:35.440 --> 00:20:37.839
That trope right there, I fucking can't stand.
00:20:38.160 --> 00:20:39.440
I really can't stand.
00:20:39.519 --> 00:20:40.559
It made me so sick.
00:20:40.640 --> 00:20:43.599
I was just like, Okay.
00:20:44.559 --> 00:20:47.359
Okay, you know, and I get it, you know what I'm saying?
00:20:47.440 --> 00:20:48.400
Not to kink shame.
00:20:48.559 --> 00:20:52.160
I get, I get it, but that's just a trope I really hate.
00:20:52.240 --> 00:21:07.599
Like, people who feel like that, they make you, it makes you feel like people who are agnostic atheists are just that way and they're waiting to do something bad to be saved by God.
00:21:07.680 --> 00:21:12.240
But it's just like I have no intentions to do anything bad, and if I did, I'm fine with eating that.
00:21:12.319 --> 00:21:18.720
Like, I don't need, you know what I'm saying, them weird ass stories to help a bitch get over some some fucked up shit I did.
00:21:18.799 --> 00:21:21.519
If I do ever some fucked up shit in life, I'm prepared to eat that.
00:21:21.599 --> 00:21:25.680
Like, I don't need no savior or no nobody to be like, it's okay, only I can judge everybody.
00:21:25.839 --> 00:21:27.440
No, I'm finna, I'm finna judge me.
00:21:27.519 --> 00:21:28.079
Don't worry about it.
00:21:28.160 --> 00:21:30.000
I got it, like, I don't know.
00:21:30.160 --> 00:21:31.200
I just hate that trope.
00:21:31.279 --> 00:21:34.720
And I've seen it, I can't remember where else I've seen it.
00:21:34.799 --> 00:21:37.359
I feel like it was an old M MTV show.
00:21:38.079 --> 00:21:40.319
But I can't remember right now, because I'm a little high.
00:21:40.640 --> 00:21:43.039
But I hated that real bad.
00:21:43.279 --> 00:21:44.960
Real bad I hated that.
00:21:45.839 --> 00:21:50.559
I did like I did like the way Nate died though.
00:21:50.720 --> 00:21:52.400
I really heavily enjoyed that.
00:21:52.640 --> 00:21:57.440
Um Cause I thought Nate should have died from like season one.
00:21:57.680 --> 00:21:59.359
I was like, just clip him, just clip him.
00:21:59.519 --> 00:21:59.839
It's alright.
00:22:00.799 --> 00:22:03.680
I did understand his importance in the series.
00:22:04.480 --> 00:22:08.160
And I feel like I feel like this is so disrespectful to say.
00:22:08.640 --> 00:22:10.000
I don't really give a fuck though.
00:22:10.160 --> 00:22:11.839
It's only disrespectful because y'all are listening.
00:22:11.920 --> 00:22:14.240
Like, if I was by myself, I'd I'd I'd go the fuck off.
00:22:14.400 --> 00:22:21.680
But I feel like Sydney Sweeney is like the perfect, like big titty, stupid blonde-haired, blue-eyed bitch.
00:22:21.839 --> 00:22:22.880
Does that make sense?
00:22:23.200 --> 00:22:29.680
Like, as me, I've never seen I've never, I don't think I've seen my own titties as much as I've seen Sydney Sweeney's titties.
00:22:29.759 --> 00:22:30.480
You know what I'm saying?
00:22:30.559 --> 00:22:39.119
Like, it is so sad to see like what clearly is happening to her in the casting world of Hollywood.
00:22:39.200 --> 00:22:39.759
You know what I'm saying?
00:22:39.839 --> 00:22:42.000
And it's crazy because I get secondhand embarrassment.
00:22:42.240 --> 00:22:49.279
The same second-hand embarrassment I felt when I saw Chloe Bailey and Swarm, I was like, her role played absolutely no, she was good.
00:22:49.359 --> 00:22:50.319
She's a good actor.
00:22:50.480 --> 00:22:54.240
But it's just like I know damn well they gave her this part just so they could see that ass shake.
00:22:54.400 --> 00:22:55.279
Did I enjoy it?
00:22:55.440 --> 00:22:56.000
Absolutely.
00:22:56.160 --> 00:23:02.960
But it was just like they could have gave anybody this part, they gave this part to you because this specific scene.
00:23:03.119 --> 00:23:05.680
And and it worked because I was tuned to fuck in.
00:23:05.920 --> 00:23:12.319
But I'm not as tuned in to Sydney Sweeney because I don't view white people as fuckable members of society.
00:23:12.480 --> 00:23:18.480
But as a woman, I'm just like that's weird what they're doing, you know what I'm saying?
00:23:18.559 --> 00:23:20.720
And it's weird that she letting them, but I don't know.
00:23:20.799 --> 00:23:21.519
I don't know anything.
00:23:21.599 --> 00:23:26.319
These are just weird ass, broke ass little opinions from the bitch on her couch, you know?
00:23:26.799 --> 00:23:33.680
But the season was very Yeah, it was very okay.
00:23:33.759 --> 00:23:40.160
Like I like the way Ali uh spoiler alert, if y'all don't know, which if you don't know by now, bitch, you don't like the show.
00:23:40.240 --> 00:23:41.279
You're not gonna watch it, you know what I'm saying?
00:23:41.359 --> 00:23:42.880
You're not even fucking with it, you know?
00:23:43.519 --> 00:23:48.640
But I do like the way Ali um avenged Rue.
00:23:49.039 --> 00:23:50.880
I thought that was really nice.
00:23:53.759 --> 00:23:57.920
You know, there just wasn't a lot to it, you know.
00:23:58.079 --> 00:24:00.079
I was just kind of watching it to see how it ended.
00:24:00.160 --> 00:24:05.920
I knew Rue was gonna die, but like definitely didn't think she would die that peaceful though, so that's really good.
00:24:06.000 --> 00:24:15.359
That's good they didn't give my bitch like no, you know, I thought she was gonna get like shot or something like that, but it was just eh, I'm glad it's over.
00:24:15.519 --> 00:24:17.119
I know that everybody else is glad it's over.
00:24:17.200 --> 00:24:18.880
They didn't even look like they had fun filming this.
00:24:19.039 --> 00:24:22.960
And Maddie, the bitch you played Maddie looked like they forced her to do every scene she did.
00:24:23.039 --> 00:24:24.160
She looked irritated the whole show.
00:24:24.240 --> 00:24:31.279
I was like, that bitch, either her check won't long enough or she really tried to slip out this bitch and that contract had her by her fucking throat.
00:24:31.519 --> 00:24:33.759
So it was just weird.
00:24:34.079 --> 00:24:36.480
It was a very weird season.
00:24:36.720 --> 00:24:44.960
Um, I am gonna wrap up because I know this episode is gonna be long as fuck to edit.
00:24:45.039 --> 00:25:09.519
Um, and I'm gonna try to get it uploaded by either tonight or tomorrow because I don't think I'll do a lot of editing, just the parts where I was stuttering, but um remind me in the next episode to tell y'all a story because I I wanna know if I'm the asshole about something that happened in my little friend group, which I don't think I am, but like I know y'all will tell me the truth, so we'll talk about it.
00:25:09.759 --> 00:25:18.319
But guys, if you're listening to this episode, please do me a favor and go on Apple Podcast or Spotify and rate the show.
00:25:18.480 --> 00:25:23.920
Tell me your favorite things about the show because I don't advertise as much as I should, and I'm over here talking about quit my job, bitch.
00:25:24.079 --> 00:25:24.640
Who am I?
00:25:24.960 --> 00:25:34.079
But if you guys will help me, I'm gonna post this on YouTube, so go leave a comment on YouTube, follow me on Instagram, Kimmy Clean Balance Black Girl, everywhere on TikTok.
00:25:34.319 --> 00:25:38.640
I went TikTok live for my birthday, it was the first time I ever do did it.
00:25:38.960 --> 00:25:42.880
Um, and there was one girl in there that was so nice to me, I can't remember her name, but love you down.
00:25:43.279 --> 00:25:45.119
Um, I'm gonna try to do that more.
00:25:45.279 --> 00:25:48.240
The Patreon is back up with new prices.
00:25:48.480 --> 00:26:04.480
I don't think, like I said in the last episode, I don't think I'm gonna put the link uh to be available until I have like a couple like episodes up there so that way as soon as you pay the$2, you can start getting content because I don't want you to pay for shit and ain't nothing up there.
00:26:04.559 --> 00:26:07.599
So just hold out on the Patreon maybe another week.
00:26:07.839 --> 00:26:11.440
Um I do have a new intro coming.
00:26:11.519 --> 00:26:14.079
I'm super super excited for you guys to see that.
00:26:14.319 --> 00:26:18.720
Um, that'll be coming out in maybe two to three more weeks.
00:26:18.880 --> 00:26:21.359
Um, because the animation just takes a while.
00:26:21.680 --> 00:26:24.000
Um, I don't know.
00:26:24.079 --> 00:26:25.279
Yeah, I'm just excited.
00:26:25.359 --> 00:26:29.279
Like, please have a black bitch out because I cannot continue to clock in.
00:26:29.599 --> 00:26:31.359
It it's just not gonna work.
00:26:31.519 --> 00:26:39.200
So I'll try to not I'll try, I will put out an audio episode tomorrow, regardless if this is up or not.
00:26:39.359 --> 00:26:43.599
That way it'll just be content after content.
00:26:43.839 --> 00:26:49.759
And if this YouTube decides to take 30 fucking days to upload this, then I'll just put out another audio episode.
00:26:49.839 --> 00:26:50.319
Fuck it.
00:26:50.480 --> 00:26:55.200
So I'll see you guys in the next episode.
00:00:11.759 --> 00:00:14.160
Hi guys, welcome back to the show.
00:00:14.400 --> 00:00:23.920
If you are new here, this podcast is a collection of visual and audio existential crisis thoughts from a chemically imbalanced black girl who is me and my name is Zarya.
00:00:24.320 --> 00:00:27.600
I'm very excited to be recording this episode, guys.
00:00:27.920 --> 00:00:32.159
I was looking through my notes and I was like, damn, what the fuck am I gonna talk about?
00:00:32.399 --> 00:00:36.560
Because I'm trying to put out two episodes a week.
00:00:36.719 --> 00:00:38.479
One video, one audio.
00:00:38.799 --> 00:00:45.920
It's not my fault though, because YouTube takes four fucking ever to I thought I turned off my mic.
00:00:46.079 --> 00:00:49.520
YouTube takes forever to upload a video episode.
00:00:49.679 --> 00:00:50.880
I don't know what I'm doing wrong.
00:00:51.039 --> 00:00:51.439
I don't know.
00:00:51.520 --> 00:00:52.880
I'm doing this all by myself.
00:00:53.119 --> 00:00:55.280
Apparently, I'm doing it in a fucked up way.
00:00:55.520 --> 00:01:01.280
So if you guys don't get a video episode, I'm trying to at least give you two audio episodes.
00:01:01.439 --> 00:01:04.560
And I really gotta stick by that because let me tell you about my job.
00:01:04.799 --> 00:01:08.159
Before we even get into the topics, y'all, I'm so tired of clocking in.
00:01:08.319 --> 00:01:09.760
Let's just chat for a second, right?
00:01:09.920 --> 00:01:11.760
Bestie to bestie, FaceTime call.
00:01:12.000 --> 00:01:12.560
Cool.
00:01:12.879 --> 00:01:17.519
Also, freshly smoked, just hopped off a blunt, made a frozen margarita.
00:01:17.599 --> 00:01:18.719
I'm feeling really good, okay?
00:01:18.879 --> 00:01:20.239
It's gonna be a great episode.
00:01:20.400 --> 00:01:22.959
I don't really even know if it is, but we'll see.
00:01:23.200 --> 00:01:32.480
Um, I'm so tired of clocking in, and I love, love helping animals, love saving animals, love it down.
00:01:34.159 --> 00:01:38.159
But like, can I also be honest?
00:01:38.319 --> 00:01:54.560
So if you don't know, like if you work in vet medicine, like vet tech, vet assistant, any kennelist kennel tech, like if you work in vet medicine at all, bitch a receptionist, can I ask a question?
00:01:56.159 --> 00:02:03.760
Why is vet medicine and like barista, why are those employees so similar?
00:02:05.200 --> 00:02:09.039
I will be everybody asked, go sit down.
00:02:10.159 --> 00:02:14.719
Sorry, just can't witness me pop my child, but they almost knocked my shit over.
00:02:14.960 --> 00:02:24.319
But seriously, vet medicine and like baristas, like coffee house cafe type workers, very similar.
00:02:24.479 --> 00:02:26.560
They them all the way fucking down.
00:02:26.719 --> 00:02:28.639
Like there is no vet hospital.
00:02:28.719 --> 00:02:30.560
I'm I'm willing, I'm willing to put money on it.
00:02:30.639 --> 00:02:32.479
I'm willing to bet a thousand.
00:02:32.639 --> 00:02:42.719
You can walk into any vet hospital, you'll see green hair, fucking necktat sleeves, fucking you'll see all types of piercings, bitch.
00:02:42.800 --> 00:02:45.360
You'll smell all types of smells, and then no shade.
00:02:45.520 --> 00:02:46.960
Mind you, this is no shade.
00:02:47.120 --> 00:02:48.879
I'm I'm one of the they vems, bitch.
00:02:48.960 --> 00:02:50.639
I am one of the they thems.
00:02:50.960 --> 00:02:59.840
But it's it just gets so exhausting at some point because it's just like, why are we working in canary?
00:03:00.319 --> 00:03:02.080
I'm about to beat the fuck out of my kids.
00:03:02.240 --> 00:03:05.039
I feel like every time, I feel like they know that I'm recording.
00:03:05.199 --> 00:03:07.120
Because now you guys are going unpunishment.
00:03:07.280 --> 00:03:11.120
Get get in the goddamn room, go in the room, go in the room.
00:03:12.400 --> 00:03:23.919
Every time you guys are asleep all day, and then when mommy picks up the damn camera, it's like we want to go to World War III, and I don't get it.
00:03:24.080 --> 00:03:45.680
Okay, but yeah, so it gets very overwhelming sometimes working around that specific group of people because it's like, babe, why are we working in ER, vet medicine ER, mind you, and you're easily overwhelmed.
00:03:47.120 --> 00:03:58.159
Why are we working overnight, 24-hour ER vet, and you don't have a good sleeping schedule?
00:03:58.400 --> 00:04:08.159
Or you get like high anxiety when anything like alarming happens, or like you know what I'm saying?
00:04:08.240 --> 00:04:17.600
Like, why did we choose the most hustle and bustle like job if hustle and bustle make you nervous?
00:04:17.680 --> 00:04:18.399
I don't know.
00:04:18.560 --> 00:04:19.680
I don't know, guys.
00:04:19.839 --> 00:04:31.839
I'm really, and that's the thing that's really making me want to like lock in, lock down on the uploads and like putting clips out on TikTok and stuff like that, because I don't want to clock in more than I want people to see me.
00:04:31.920 --> 00:04:32.560
You know what I'm saying?
00:04:32.639 --> 00:04:37.839
Because I I always get in this thing, it's like, well, I don't want the podcast to go too viral, you know what I'm saying?
00:04:38.079 --> 00:04:40.000
Girl, it can go as viral as it wanna be.
00:04:40.079 --> 00:04:44.160
As long as I don't gotta push clock in anymore, anybody can see this motherfucking podcast, okay?
00:04:44.240 --> 00:04:51.519
I you know that thing where they say for like what four billion dollars, your family has to watch your whole life from start to finish.
00:04:51.759 --> 00:04:54.800
That has never that has never been an issue with me.
00:04:54.959 --> 00:04:55.360
Watch it.
00:04:55.439 --> 00:04:59.920
Put 3D glasses on while you watch it, because half of what it is is gonna be all motherfuckers fucking with me, okay?
00:05:00.079 --> 00:05:03.120
Let's let's watch it together, let's hold hands while we watch it, okay?
00:05:03.279 --> 00:05:04.879
Girl, no, I couldn't.
00:05:05.040 --> 00:05:05.600
I can't.
00:05:05.680 --> 00:05:07.279
I'm so tired of fucking clocking in.
00:05:07.360 --> 00:05:07.839
I get it.
00:05:07.920 --> 00:05:14.800
I get why people like you know when you hear stories about people dropping they whole shit moving to Cali with$2,000.
00:05:15.920 --> 00:05:20.079
Although I would never do that, I do understand it, because this shit but for birds.
00:05:20.160 --> 00:05:22.800
I don't know who, I don't know what type, but it is.
00:05:34.560 --> 00:05:42.720
Um it's like I like my job, like I like what I do for work.
00:05:45.040 --> 00:05:47.680
But like I can't just do that without the people.
00:05:47.839 --> 00:05:56.800
And even when I was a flight attendant, like I loved I don't I don't know if I loved working the flights.
00:05:56.879 --> 00:06:00.079
I don't know if I like that because like that that was just the people.
00:06:01.279 --> 00:06:04.160
I don't know if I love that, but I like traveling and stuff like that.
00:06:04.240 --> 00:06:15.839
It's just like when you have to deal with people and you're serving them of any type, it's just it's just like bitch, I gotta find a skill.
00:06:15.920 --> 00:06:18.959
Like, I'm over here, I'm checking my body for like a third nipple or some shit.
00:06:19.040 --> 00:06:20.639
Like, girl, what can get the crowd rocking?
00:06:20.720 --> 00:06:22.639
Like, I I I cannot clock in, guys.
00:06:22.720 --> 00:06:24.720
I cannot, I cannot clock in anymore.
00:06:24.800 --> 00:06:44.399
Like, after 30, I'm gonna start breaking my bones live on the internet because like I don't know, this shit is really for the birds, and I know that's kind of hypocritical because I'm always the type of person that's like like clout chasing and like hype beast and all that shit, like doing shit for the internet has always like rubbed me the wrong way.
00:06:45.040 --> 00:06:50.480
But like for the money, I get it, I do get it for the money.
00:06:50.720 --> 00:06:54.079
I do get it for the money for clout and just to have people talking about you and shit like that.
00:06:54.240 --> 00:06:55.680
I don't understand that.
00:06:56.079 --> 00:07:01.920
But like doing shit that you know is guaranteed revenue, I'll shut the fuck up.
00:07:02.160 --> 00:07:04.079
I'ma judge you a little bit.
00:07:04.639 --> 00:07:10.560
But after I do my pocket watching, I'm gonna be like, oh okay, okay, what can I say?
00:07:10.639 --> 00:07:11.279
You know what I'm saying?
00:07:11.439 --> 00:07:13.120
I bitch just got off the clock.
00:07:13.360 --> 00:07:19.920
Um, so yeah, speaking of on the clock, let's violently change subjects.
00:07:21.279 --> 00:07:31.199
I was talking to a homeboy of mine who just does not believe like my whole thing with dating.
00:07:31.439 --> 00:07:36.000
If you don't know, bitch, if this is the first time you ever click on this podcast, you don't know a bitch.
00:07:36.319 --> 00:07:44.399
I am very like too comfortable with being alone in romantic and platonic um situations.
00:07:44.560 --> 00:07:51.439
Like, I just for my mental health plural, like I just need to be alone more than your average human, right?
00:07:51.519 --> 00:07:54.959
And that's gotten me in some trouble with my family, friends, love life, whatever.
00:07:55.120 --> 00:08:02.079
But it's it's a ness it's a necessity for me because I don't like to have my like crash outs or mental breakdowns in front of people.
00:08:02.319 --> 00:08:05.839
So like I need to be alone for multiple days at a time.
00:08:05.920 --> 00:08:09.839
That way I can have those emotions in peace, and then I come back out like, what's up, bitches?
00:08:10.720 --> 00:08:12.959
Freshly off a Minty B.
00:08:13.279 --> 00:08:26.879
So um, and so because I'm in that era of my life, I just don't think dating is a good idea because like I don't want to be in the middle of a I'm in here like losing my fucking mind, and like my nigga or my bitch is like, Hey, where you at?
00:08:26.959 --> 00:08:27.920
We were supposed to go to dinner.
00:08:28.160 --> 00:08:31.040
Bitch, I have a knife in my throat, and you think I care about steak?
00:08:32.320 --> 00:08:33.840
I'm about to jump out the window.
00:08:33.919 --> 00:08:35.600
You think I care about scallops?
00:08:37.039 --> 00:08:37.919
Fuck dinner.
00:08:38.080 --> 00:08:39.039
Fuck you, fuck me.
00:08:39.120 --> 00:08:40.240
Everybody, everybody's gonna die.
00:08:40.320 --> 00:08:40.960
You know what I'm saying?
00:08:41.039 --> 00:08:55.200
So it's just like I I just feel like because I need to, because I haven't found another remedy for how I am outside of medicine, because I'm just not gonna be that type of bitch.
00:08:55.279 --> 00:09:00.080
I wish I would have a regular emotion and somebody say, Oh, you didn't take your medicine.
00:09:01.440 --> 00:09:03.279
But y'all, I'll air the whole crib out.
00:09:03.360 --> 00:09:10.720
So it's just like I don't want to take medicine because I can't, I don't want to have natural reactions to shit, and people like that bitch ain't pop a pill today.
00:09:10.799 --> 00:09:12.799
Like, fuck a pill, fuck a pill.
00:09:12.960 --> 00:09:14.159
I can't do it.
00:09:14.639 --> 00:09:22.320
So me taking three, four days by myself is kind of like my Zoloft, you know, that's my trash don't.
00:09:22.399 --> 00:09:28.159
I just need to be in this bitch by myself so I can do, you know, so forget.
00:09:28.480 --> 00:09:40.639
Um, but my homeboy does understand that he's like, well, if you found the right person to make you not need that, then you know that'll be good.
00:09:40.799 --> 00:09:52.480
And I'm just like, why do people get so I don't even know how to describe that, like some shit doesn't need to involve another person, you know what I'm saying?
00:09:52.639 --> 00:09:56.399
And that be scaring me, low-key, about people who need other people.
00:09:56.799 --> 00:10:14.240
Did y'all see that post on TikTok where the girl was like, I think I get so easily enraged by people who need their handheld through everything in life or need a buddy through everything in life because I was so violently forced to be independent at such a young age.
00:10:14.480 --> 00:10:22.159
That is me, because it's just like, what do you mean if I meet a person that don't make me feel like I need to be alone?
00:10:22.320 --> 00:10:26.960
Bitch, I'ma still need to be alone because that person is near me.
00:10:27.039 --> 00:10:28.399
Like, I don't understand.
00:10:28.720 --> 00:10:45.919
Um, and I think it's just people overvaluing like their place in somebody's life, and not even their place as in like them, but like overvaluing like human presence at certain times, you know.
00:10:46.000 --> 00:10:53.759
When there said there's a time and a place, there's there's literally a time and a place to be with other people, like and I I get that a lot.
00:10:53.840 --> 00:10:56.159
Like, people are like, Well, how can you just do everything alone?
00:10:56.320 --> 00:11:01.440
Because like I'm still a person, like if you think that I'm not by myself when I'm alone, you got another thing coming.
00:11:01.519 --> 00:11:10.879
Cause it's a it's 38 bitches in here that are just like one's tap dancing, the other one's screaming, the other one's trying to like drown in the other.
00:11:10.960 --> 00:11:11.440
You know what I'm saying?
00:11:11.519 --> 00:11:14.879
It's 38 bitches in here that I am constantly just like shh shh, huh?
00:11:14.960 --> 00:11:15.759
What bitch?
00:11:15.840 --> 00:11:43.519
Okay, okay, you know, like so I know that made me sound so crazy, but it's just like there are some people who just are so okay with being alone, and I think that freaks some people out, like, because I'll have people asking me, like, oh well, would you do this or that and rather be alone?
00:11:43.600 --> 00:11:55.600
And like, my answer is always just like I would there that you you the anxiety about certain situations and the fear in certain situations only pop up for me when there's another person involved.
00:11:55.759 --> 00:12:08.159
I could be fucked as long as the day is long, I could be in such a bad situation for myself personally, and like it won't make me feel any type of way because I'm like, I know I can get myself out of it.
00:12:08.320 --> 00:12:13.200
As soon as you attach me, this situation to somebody else, I'm immediately freaking the fuck out.
00:12:13.279 --> 00:12:14.080
I'm actually about to cry.
00:12:14.159 --> 00:12:15.919
I'm already crying, it's okay.
00:12:24.159 --> 00:12:30.799
So that was something I just found interesting because I don't know.
00:12:31.039 --> 00:12:47.120
I've always been kind of just to myself, I guess, but I never really looked at it as a bad thing, and I think the older I get, the more people are starting to like uh, you know, people are starting to like feel bad.
00:12:47.200 --> 00:12:53.919
Like when I was younger, even about having kids, like people always say, like, oh, we'll wait till you find the right man.
00:12:54.080 --> 00:13:01.679
Like, if if the person is trying to change my mind about the way I feel, then that's that's that's me getting got.
00:13:01.759 --> 00:13:05.120
That's me letting somebody else fuck with the way I know I feel.
00:13:05.279 --> 00:13:06.879
That's not right, you know what I'm saying?
00:13:06.960 --> 00:13:17.840
Like, they need to be able to understand how I feel and leave me to do it, or they need to feel the exact same way and we just process and flow through each other because we know exactly how the other feels.
00:13:18.000 --> 00:13:26.080
But I'm not in the market for tweaking how the fuck I genuinely feel and think just to be in the presence of another motherfucker.
00:13:26.159 --> 00:13:27.039
That is not cute to me.
00:13:27.120 --> 00:13:27.600
I'm so sorry.
00:13:27.679 --> 00:13:30.320
I'm mm-mm won't do it.
00:13:30.399 --> 00:13:35.120
I'm so sorry, but um let's get to the other topics.
00:13:35.360 --> 00:14:08.080
Um speaking of on the clock, this is the this is the point I was trying to wrap up with um my homeboy because one thing I hate about being in relationships with men and women, and this is why I'll be alone for the foreseeable future, is because I don't like to feel like my pussy is on the clock.
00:14:08.240 --> 00:14:09.279
You know what I'm saying?
00:14:09.360 --> 00:14:38.799
Like, over sexually men, over sexual women, that shit be making me uncomfortable, and like I'm I'm just gonna say something like because I've had this experience with a woman, it gives like it's teetering, like you got a real sad sexual history, you know what I'm saying?
00:14:38.879 --> 00:14:39.840
Y'all know what I'm trying to say.
00:14:39.919 --> 00:14:42.720
All the lesbians and bisexuals, y'all get what I'm trying to say.
00:14:42.879 --> 00:14:48.320
And for a man, it's just like anything a man do that I find weird is just predatory, you know what I'm saying?
00:14:48.399 --> 00:14:50.559
Because I'm just like, why do you want to fuck 24-7?
00:14:52.320 --> 00:14:53.039
You know what I'm saying?
00:14:53.120 --> 00:14:54.080
Like, get the fuck off of me.
00:14:54.159 --> 00:14:55.600
I hate feeling like my pussy on the clock.
00:14:55.679 --> 00:14:57.039
I hate feeling like my pussy on the clock.
00:14:57.120 --> 00:15:00.159
I really do, I really do, I really do, I really do.
00:15:00.320 --> 00:15:04.480
And like, I remember I used to date this girl.
00:15:04.639 --> 00:15:20.159
Oh my gosh, she would get irritated if I didn't like bust her down, like irritated, and I'm not gonna lie, she had some unfortunate experiences with sex in her younger years.
00:15:23.039 --> 00:15:30.000
But I'm not gonna lie, that that that that was also pissing me off because why am I fucking the trauma out of you?
00:15:30.159 --> 00:15:32.159
You need to go to therapy.
00:15:33.679 --> 00:15:36.480
We need to go to therapy, bitch, because now I'm traumatized.
00:15:36.559 --> 00:15:46.639
Like, I don't like I don't like how hypersexual a lot of people are, and and and usually it's because of some fucked up shit that happened to them.
00:15:46.720 --> 00:15:49.519
Not all the time, not all the time, just in my experience, bitch.
00:15:49.679 --> 00:15:54.320
Some people just have sex addictions, and you can't really do anything about that.
00:15:54.480 --> 00:16:06.639
But um, in my experience with men and women, it has usually stemmed from some type of inappropriacy, and it's just like I can't do that for you.
00:16:06.799 --> 00:16:12.159
I can't, I can't, I can't because I can't.
00:16:12.399 --> 00:16:15.120
So me being alone is perfect, you know what I'm saying?
00:16:15.200 --> 00:16:23.840
If if I was like overly freaked out, if I was younger and I wanted to pop pussy like, you know, a movie theater, but I'm not there yet.
00:16:23.919 --> 00:16:26.159
I'm uh nor have I ever been, you know what I'm saying?
00:16:26.240 --> 00:16:29.279
And nor will I be because I don't know.
00:16:29.440 --> 00:16:30.799
I was about to say something so wild.
00:16:30.879 --> 00:16:35.200
I'm about to say this coochie is a grandma, but she not, she not, she not a grandma.
00:16:35.360 --> 00:16:42.320
Okay, she is a very let's change the subject, okay?
00:16:42.879 --> 00:16:58.240
I don't wanna I don't wanna um member of the family my vagina because I was about to say she is a really um she is a very respectable auntie, okay?
00:17:00.320 --> 00:17:02.159
Very nice auntie, okay?
00:17:02.399 --> 00:17:02.960
I don't know.
00:17:03.360 --> 00:17:04.559
Let's just forget I said that.
00:17:04.640 --> 00:17:06.160
I'm not gonna edit it out either.
00:17:06.400 --> 00:17:09.519
I'm gonna you guys are gonna remember that I called my vagina an auntie.
00:17:09.680 --> 00:17:19.039
Um also what else did I want to talk to you guys about?
00:17:30.880 --> 00:17:36.400
Oh my gosh, I do want to talk to you guys about the ending of Euphoria.
00:17:37.519 --> 00:17:38.720
The third season.
00:17:39.119 --> 00:17:41.440
Girl, I should've listened to y'all.
00:17:41.519 --> 00:17:46.400
I should have listened to y'all because I saw the comments and shit like that were like this season should have just been an email, bitch.
00:17:46.480 --> 00:17:47.440
I should have listened.
00:17:56.000 --> 00:18:00.079
Bitch, the third season of Euphoria pissed me clean off.
00:18:02.400 --> 00:18:14.559
And it pissed me off because there were so many characters that weren't in the season that were replaced by characters that for damn sure should not have been in this season.
00:18:14.880 --> 00:18:21.519
And it made me feel bad for Nate's dad because it just looked like he was hurting the whole time.
00:18:21.680 --> 00:18:25.279
I was like, he could have had a phone call scene, you know what I'm saying?
00:18:26.000 --> 00:18:31.440
From his character in the first two seasons to that, it was just hard to watch, you know what I'm saying?
00:18:31.599 --> 00:18:33.519
Rest in peace, because goddamn.
00:18:33.839 --> 00:18:40.319
Umules, I don't know.
00:18:40.400 --> 00:18:43.200
It looked like Jules was off of Bean the whole episode.
00:18:43.279 --> 00:18:46.559
I mean, her every episode, her mouth was just sliding the fuck off.
00:18:46.640 --> 00:18:47.599
I don't know what was going on.
00:18:47.680 --> 00:18:50.480
Like her storyline was stupid.
00:18:50.799 --> 00:18:54.000
You just fucking a rich nigga, like, okay.
00:18:54.319 --> 00:18:56.079
We also could have found that out through email.
00:18:56.160 --> 00:18:56.720
You know what I'm saying?
00:18:56.799 --> 00:19:00.000
Like, for her to be in the entire season did not make any sense.
00:19:00.160 --> 00:19:05.680
Her rude didn't fuck, like, there was no like relationship.
00:19:06.240 --> 00:19:07.200
There was nothing.
00:19:07.359 --> 00:19:08.160
There was nothing.
00:19:08.319 --> 00:19:09.759
You know what actually pissed me off?
00:19:09.920 --> 00:19:10.400
Let's talk about it.
00:19:10.480 --> 00:19:12.160
This is really why I brought it up.
00:19:12.559 --> 00:19:25.359
The actual real thing that pisses me off about that pissed me off about the third season of Euphoria is that there's a trope in Lexi that I fucking hate when it comes to movies and TV shows.
00:19:25.680 --> 00:19:33.359
Because Lexi had this very hard standpoint at the beginning of the season about Christians, about religion in general.
00:19:33.599 --> 00:19:34.799
Very valid points.
00:19:34.880 --> 00:19:36.240
They're judgmental, da da da.
00:19:36.480 --> 00:19:37.839
Damn near kick Rue out for Rue.
00:19:38.000 --> 00:19:41.519
Rue had one epiphany, and Lexi was like, bitch, you're gonna have to get the fuck up out of here with that.
00:19:41.599 --> 00:19:43.519
I don't I don't like all that shit, right?
00:19:44.960 --> 00:19:53.920
Only then to when Rue died, Lexi picks up the Bible and is like, oh, it's actually like beautiful and fascinating.
00:19:54.079 --> 00:20:01.039
But it only became beautiful and fascinating because she needed something to make her not feel guilty about how she left things with Rue.
00:20:01.440 --> 00:20:05.359
Further proving that that shit is just a coping mechanism.
00:20:05.599 --> 00:20:27.680
And if this book or any organized religion or higher being can make you feel like you're justified and what you did, and can't nobody judge you, and this shit really don't matter because it's all up to God, then of course you're gonna lean into that because you don't want to spend the rest of your life feeling bad that you didn't cuss this bitch out and and and said that she was off three beans when she really wasn't, and the next time you heard of her, she was dead.
00:20:27.839 --> 00:20:29.920
You don't want to go through the rest of your life feeling like that.
00:20:30.079 --> 00:20:33.359
So you picked up this book, it was like nothing's my fault.
00:20:34.240 --> 00:20:35.279
Okay, I love it.
00:20:35.440 --> 00:20:37.839
That trope right there, I fucking can't stand.
00:20:38.160 --> 00:20:39.440
I really can't stand.
00:20:39.519 --> 00:20:40.559
It made me so sick.
00:20:40.640 --> 00:20:43.599
I was just like, Okay.
00:20:44.559 --> 00:20:47.359
Okay, you know, and I get it, you know what I'm saying?
00:20:47.440 --> 00:20:48.400
Not to kink shame.
00:20:48.559 --> 00:20:52.160
I get, I get it, but that's just a trope I really hate.
00:20:52.240 --> 00:21:07.599
Like, people who feel like that, they make you, it makes you feel like people who are agnostic atheists are just that way and they're waiting to do something bad to be saved by God.
00:21:07.680 --> 00:21:12.240
But it's just like I have no intentions to do anything bad, and if I did, I'm fine with eating that.
00:21:12.319 --> 00:21:18.720
Like, I don't need, you know what I'm saying, them weird ass stories to help a bitch get over some some fucked up shit I did.
00:21:18.799 --> 00:21:21.519
If I do ever some fucked up shit in life, I'm prepared to eat that.
00:21:21.599 --> 00:21:25.680
Like, I don't need no savior or no nobody to be like, it's okay, only I can judge everybody.
00:21:25.839 --> 00:21:27.440
No, I'm finna, I'm finna judge me.
00:21:27.519 --> 00:21:28.079
Don't worry about it.
00:21:28.160 --> 00:21:30.000
I got it, like, I don't know.
00:21:30.160 --> 00:21:31.200
I just hate that trope.
00:21:31.279 --> 00:21:34.720
And I've seen it, I can't remember where else I've seen it.
00:21:34.799 --> 00:21:37.359
I feel like it was an old M MTV show.
00:21:38.079 --> 00:21:40.319
But I can't remember right now, because I'm a little high.
00:21:40.640 --> 00:21:43.039
But I hated that real bad.
00:21:43.279 --> 00:21:44.960
Real bad I hated that.
00:21:45.839 --> 00:21:50.559
I did like I did like the way Nate died though.
00:21:50.720 --> 00:21:52.400
I really heavily enjoyed that.
00:21:52.640 --> 00:21:57.440
Um Cause I thought Nate should have died from like season one.
00:21:57.680 --> 00:21:59.359
I was like, just clip him, just clip him.
00:21:59.519 --> 00:21:59.839
It's alright.
00:22:00.799 --> 00:22:03.680
I did understand his importance in the series.
00:22:04.480 --> 00:22:08.160
And I feel like I feel like this is so disrespectful to say.
00:22:08.640 --> 00:22:10.000
I don't really give a fuck though.
00:22:10.160 --> 00:22:11.839
It's only disrespectful because y'all are listening.
00:22:11.920 --> 00:22:14.240
Like, if I was by myself, I'd I'd I'd go the fuck off.
00:22:14.400 --> 00:22:21.680
But I feel like Sydney Sweeney is like the perfect, like big titty, stupid blonde-haired, blue-eyed bitch.
00:22:21.839 --> 00:22:22.880
Does that make sense?
00:22:23.200 --> 00:22:29.680
Like, as me, I've never seen I've never, I don't think I've seen my own titties as much as I've seen Sydney Sweeney's titties.
00:22:29.759 --> 00:22:30.480
You know what I'm saying?
00:22:30.559 --> 00:22:39.119
Like, it is so sad to see like what clearly is happening to her in the casting world of Hollywood.
00:22:39.200 --> 00:22:39.759
You know what I'm saying?
00:22:39.839 --> 00:22:42.000
And it's crazy because I get secondhand embarrassment.
00:22:42.240 --> 00:22:49.279
The same second-hand embarrassment I felt when I saw Chloe Bailey and Swarm, I was like, her role played absolutely no, she was good.
00:22:49.359 --> 00:22:50.319
She's a good actor.
00:22:50.480 --> 00:22:54.240
But it's just like I know damn well they gave her this part just so they could see that ass shake.
00:22:54.400 --> 00:22:55.279
Did I enjoy it?
00:22:55.440 --> 00:22:56.000
Absolutely.
00:22:56.160 --> 00:23:02.960
But it was just like they could have gave anybody this part, they gave this part to you because this specific scene.
00:23:03.119 --> 00:23:05.680
And and it worked because I was tuned to fuck in.
00:23:05.920 --> 00:23:12.319
But I'm not as tuned in to Sydney Sweeney because I don't view white people as fuckable members of society.
00:23:12.480 --> 00:23:18.480
But as a woman, I'm just like that's weird what they're doing, you know what I'm saying?
00:23:18.559 --> 00:23:20.720
And it's weird that she letting them, but I don't know.
00:23:20.799 --> 00:23:21.519
I don't know anything.
00:23:21.599 --> 00:23:26.319
These are just weird ass, broke ass little opinions from the bitch on her couch, you know?
00:23:26.799 --> 00:23:33.680
But the season was very Yeah, it was very okay.
00:23:33.759 --> 00:23:40.160
Like I like the way Ali uh spoiler alert, if y'all don't know, which if you don't know by now, bitch, you don't like the show.
00:23:40.240 --> 00:23:41.279
You're not gonna watch it, you know what I'm saying?
00:23:41.359 --> 00:23:42.880
You're not even fucking with it, you know?
00:23:43.519 --> 00:23:48.640
But I do like the way Ali um avenged Rue.
00:23:49.039 --> 00:23:50.880
I thought that was really nice.
00:23:53.759 --> 00:23:57.920
You know, there just wasn't a lot to it, you know.
00:23:58.079 --> 00:24:00.079
I was just kind of watching it to see how it ended.
00:24:00.160 --> 00:24:05.920
I knew Rue was gonna die, but like definitely didn't think she would die that peaceful though, so that's really good.
00:24:06.000 --> 00:24:15.359
That's good they didn't give my bitch like no, you know, I thought she was gonna get like shot or something like that, but it was just eh, I'm glad it's over.
00:24:15.519 --> 00:24:17.119
I know that everybody else is glad it's over.
00:24:17.200 --> 00:24:18.880
They didn't even look like they had fun filming this.
00:24:19.039 --> 00:24:22.960
And Maddie, the bitch you played Maddie looked like they forced her to do every scene she did.
00:24:23.039 --> 00:24:24.160
She looked irritated the whole show.
00:24:24.240 --> 00:24:31.279
I was like, that bitch, either her check won't long enough or she really tried to slip out this bitch and that contract had her by her fucking throat.
00:24:31.519 --> 00:24:33.759
So it was just weird.
00:24:34.079 --> 00:24:36.480
It was a very weird season.
00:24:36.720 --> 00:24:44.960
Um, I am gonna wrap up because I know this episode is gonna be long as fuck to edit.
00:24:45.039 --> 00:25:09.519
Um, and I'm gonna try to get it uploaded by either tonight or tomorrow because I don't think I'll do a lot of editing, just the parts where I was stuttering, but um remind me in the next episode to tell y'all a story because I I wanna know if I'm the asshole about something that happened in my little friend group, which I don't think I am, but like I know y'all will tell me the truth, so we'll talk about it.
00:25:09.759 --> 00:25:18.319
But guys, if you're listening to this episode, please do me a favor and go on Apple Podcast or Spotify and rate the show.
00:25:18.480 --> 00:25:23.920
Tell me your favorite things about the show because I don't advertise as much as I should, and I'm over here talking about quit my job, bitch.
00:25:24.079 --> 00:25:24.640
Who am I?
00:25:24.960 --> 00:25:34.079
But if you guys will help me, I'm gonna post this on YouTube, so go leave a comment on YouTube, follow me on Instagram, Kimmy Clean Balance Black Girl, everywhere on TikTok.
00:25:34.319 --> 00:25:38.640
I went TikTok live for my birthday, it was the first time I ever do did it.
00:25:38.960 --> 00:25:42.880
Um, and there was one girl in there that was so nice to me, I can't remember her name, but love you down.
00:25:43.279 --> 00:25:45.119
Um, I'm gonna try to do that more.
00:25:45.279 --> 00:25:48.240
The Patreon is back up with new prices.
00:25:48.480 --> 00:26:04.480
I don't think, like I said in the last episode, I don't think I'm gonna put the link uh to be available until I have like a couple like episodes up there so that way as soon as you pay the$2, you can start getting content because I don't want you to pay for shit and ain't nothing up there.
00:26:04.559 --> 00:26:07.599
So just hold out on the Patreon maybe another week.
00:26:07.839 --> 00:26:11.440
Um I do have a new intro coming.
00:26:11.519 --> 00:26:14.079
I'm super super excited for you guys to see that.
00:26:14.319 --> 00:26:18.720
Um, that'll be coming out in maybe two to three more weeks.
00:26:18.880 --> 00:26:21.359
Um, because the animation just takes a while.
00:26:21.680 --> 00:26:24.000
Um, I don't know.
00:26:24.079 --> 00:26:25.279
Yeah, I'm just excited.
00:26:25.359 --> 00:26:29.279
Like, please have a black bitch out because I cannot continue to clock in.
00:26:29.599 --> 00:26:31.359
It it's just not gonna work.
00:26:31.519 --> 00:26:39.200
So I'll try to not I'll try, I will put out an audio episode tomorrow, regardless if this is up or not.
00:26:39.359 --> 00:26:43.599
That way it'll just be content after content.
00:26:43.839 --> 00:26:49.759
And if this YouTube decides to take 30 fucking days to upload this, then I'll just put out another audio episode.
00:26:49.839 --> 00:26:50.319
Fuck it.
00:26:50.480 --> 00:26:55.200
So I'll see you guys in the next episode.
