# Esther Perel
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esther perel (born 1958) is a Belgian psychotherapist of Polish-Jewish descent who has explored the tension between the need for security (love, belonging and closeness) and the need for freedom (erotic desire, adventure and distance) in human relationships.Perel promoted the concept of Erotic Intelligence in her book Mating in Captivity: Unlocking Erotic Intelligence (2006), which has been translated into 24 languages. After publishing the book, she became an international advisor on sex and relationships. She gave a TED talk in February 2013 entitled The secret to desire in a long-term relationship, and another in March 2015 entitled Rethinking infidelity ...
Esther Perel
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The Hidden Reason You Keep Parenting Your Partner
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Unspoken expectations in marriage can turn two capable adults into the one who reminds and the one who keeps getting reminded. If you keep having the same fight about money, parenting, or how the dishwasher gets loaded, chances are the fight isn’t about any of those things. It’s ab…
The Downfall of Dating: Are We Looking for Love All Wrong? | Esther Perel
Renowned psychotherapist and relationship expert Esther Perel joins Maria Sharapova on Pretty Tough to explore why modern dating feels so exhausting and what makes long-term relationships lose their spark. Esther explains why dating has become more like a job interview, how the qualities we initial…
Daddy brain: how parenthood changes men
Can a shrinking brain and drop in testosterone levels ever be a good thing? Turns out, yes.
We find out why fatherhood forces these neurobiological changes in men, and how they help our species survive.
Plus… can the size of new fathers' testicles tell us something about their involvement in pare…
When You’re Not Having Sex In Your Relationship
Are you in a relationship where you don’t really have sex? You told us all the reasons why your life sex has stopped, from health issues and medication, neurodivergence and stress, to discovering your asexuality or a total loss of attraction and desire. In this ep, we hear how you’ve handled it, an…
Elise Loehnen – What Women Give Up to Be Loved | Real Love Ready Ep 28
What do women give up in order to be loved?
Elise Loehnen spent years helping tell other people’s stories before turning her attention to the invisible rules shaping her own. In her New York Times bestseller On Our Best Behavior, she examines how deeply women learn to associate goodness with accep…
Fantasy vs. Desire: Do You Actually Want What You Fantasize About?
You have fantasies. You also have desires. And they’re not the same thing.
A fantasy is a thought or mental picture that turns you on. A desire is something you actually want to do. Most people have never separated them, and mixing them up is why so many people hide fantasies they’d be happy to sha…
What Does “Loving Thy Neighbor” Actually Look Like?
Hey, there. I’m back from the trenches of King County elections. Election night was frenzied: I spent the evening fighting with printers and filing change-of-address forms and didn’t have a second to check my phone until I got the train at 9:30pm. Highly recommend!
When I got home, I was thrilled t…
Postcoital Pancakes
This week, we kick off with a long-awaited reunion, a holiday on the horizon, and a looming school transition. We chat about Esther Perel's breakfast rule for her sons and their sleepover guests, anxiety around doomsday prepping, and why we're the ultimate anti-survivors. There's also tooth mainten…
Nobody Taught Us How to Love (And It Shows)
We spend years learning how to read, write, and navigate the world, but somehow nobody teaches us how to love. And judging by the state of modern relationships, we could all use a little extra credit! This week on The Lo Life Podcast, Lo welcomes Robin Ducharme, relationship educator, former matchm…
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