Alone but not lonely; inside this Hasidic woman’s world | Gita Katz

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I can't do this independently. The role later keeps me upright.
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It doesn't help me walk all it does, and it
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doesn't let me bend bend over. And you know how
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do people react to you walk everywhere with Well, they
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look poor woman walking with this contraption, And the sadder
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they look, the bigger my smile becomes. By the time
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we pass each other, we waved. This is ga Hi,
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how's everybody? We are going to make Rocott Crumpley. The
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English inflation of it is packed potatoes. But it's much
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more than packed potatoes. It's not potatoes in a brown bag,
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solicious potatoes baked in en oven with a lot of
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dairy goodies. How often do you cook? Me? Cook? I can,
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but I'll be very honest for myself, I never cook,
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except I make sure I have food for shops. Most
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of it is cooked by me. I'll buy some just
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you know, some additions. But I'm not a meat eater.
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I don't like meat, so I don't cook too much alone.
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I'm home alone, yes, and but you and me, if
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I dare I have peanut butter by myself? Yes? Is
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that sad? It's sad, But not because it's sad. It's
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sad because my husband is not here with me. But
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I read, and I read a difference between loneliness and solitude.
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And when I'm home for shopping, it's not about loneliness,
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you know. I like to be with myself. So I
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read a lot and I doven in between them. It'll
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takes me a couple of hours. And when I'm away,
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I have to adjust to other people's schedules, and I
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lose a tremendous amount of my time, which is reading,
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mostly in shops. So I just prefer to spend that home.
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But my family come, as my children come at all
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hours at all times. I'm alone, but I'm not lonely
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when it comes to sitting down by the mead alone.
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That's so very hard for me to to, you know,
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to live with. But I made it dough. Did you
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think of remarrying?
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Sorry?
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Absolutely never? Never? No, why not? Because truthfully, if I'm
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being very honest in fairness to the person, I would
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marry because I would compare everybody to who my husband
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was and wouldn't do them justice right, So it would
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not work. No, No, there's no way. My husband just
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says something so phenomenal. When I discussed it and we
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talked about his illness and his unfortunate demise, I asked
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him what am I going to do here without you?
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So he said, what do you mean you'll remarry? I says, no,
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never have to miss the cat So uh he said,
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well why not? I said, because I I I can't
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imagine living with anybody else. He says, Listen, he says,
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I want to tell you something. I don't know if
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you want to remarry, but if you do, please marry
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a rich man because I want him to give you
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everything that I wasn't able to give you. Wow. And
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there wasn't a single thing that I ever wanted from
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day one that I married him that I didn't have.
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So wow, So that was really not a correct statement
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at all. Wow. He Yeah, he was the gentlest, bestest,
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good hearted soul. Yeah. Yeah.
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Can we can we take a look around at the
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house you shared with him? How many years did you
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share this?
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When we were married for forty seven years? Wow, let's
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take a look.
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It's beautiful and it's a beautiful day.
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This is your china closet, yes, which is almost empty.
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I gave all my stuff to my children, ninety percent
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of it just left the enough silver or glass that
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I need to celebrate. Chops and Jantif this is my
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uh siblings at one of my son's wedding. That's my
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father and my father in law. Lower down is my grandfather.
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She was my mother's father. He survived the war, and
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he came to America a little later than all of us.
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And he was the sweetest, sweetest old man, and he
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had a fabulous relationship with us, and we loved him
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to pieces. He was almost the only grandfather in Williamsburg.
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He died very suddenly in one minute, when he was
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eighty one years old. He was not an old man,
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and he was a very, very beloved person. So all
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my children had a great grandfather.
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Do you sit out here?
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Yeah? Sure, absolutely Java this morning. I first have a
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coffee here, of course, when the weather permitting, and then
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I look around a little bit, you know, yet did
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see watching over the beautiful children and clothing? Oh? I
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love it? And all the men who go to chulaid.
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Do you know who is like late?
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I don't know. I don't know that. I'm not interested.
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I don't want to know us or even in my head,
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But I just find it amazing to see, you know,
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when everybody's almost coming home and people are nicually walking
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to shield, you know, very very slowly and very comfortably.
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And no, it's just interesting to observe. And then I doven.
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I also dimen on the porch with the weather is nice,
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and then I go and I read, and then I
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get ready for my meal, and then I finish part
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of it, and then I read again. This goes out
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until about four and the thrown every shoves.
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I'm sure your kids would happily move in if you
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wanted them to.
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I wouldn't want I wouldn't want them to because I
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don't think it's fair. They all have families and children.
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They deserve to have their comfort, you know, and their
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space in their own comfort zone for the children. But
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they come in the summer from when the clock has
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moved there come every shop this afternoon. They have a
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shallow sheetas in my house. And when the clock has
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moved back, when multi shavis comes becomes very long and
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shaves is short, they come fear for Abdullah and then
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they stay here from Avamalka. They eat, you know, they
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snack and they have fun. But we get to see
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them every week, almost every week, every Wednesday, my children
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who live for come up to visit. That's like carved stone. Well,
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my husband was alive and even my oldest son used
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to come in from Manhattan and we all got together
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and we had all these big pow wows and you know,
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the fun discussions and the sibling arguments and it was
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just wonderful. But now the ones who live close by
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still come here. And that's basically my interaction a whole
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week with my family. How many kids do you have seven?
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How many grandkids you really want the truth? Yes, forty
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forty nine horror, and I have almost that much great granded.
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Do you know all their names? It's impossible, absolutely really
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absolutely so every time baby is born, and make sure
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I know the name, and I remember the name, and
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and I try to focus on it because I don't
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want them to come to my house and you know,
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and I have no idea. Tell me what's your name?
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Who do you belong? Yeah? That was my grandparents. I
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do know all their names so far, so far, Wait
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till we get to one hundred. I don't think I
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want to be around and twenty comes, you know, in
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the meantime, But other than that. What am I going
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to do here? Too long to be by myself? You'll
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remarry and yeah, me and you? That was I think
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you're not a nice thing to say in public. No, no, no,
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I am good on my own. I'm not lonely either. No, really,
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I have to tell you, there's no way in the
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world I wouldn't compare the nicest person to my husband,
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and I couldn't accept anybody second second best. You know,
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he was just so so unusual. Look across the street.
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They're also that those three porches also have young women
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sitting out there with little children, and it's just a
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very nice way to spend chib this morning and just
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have what to look around at. That's all. Yeah, my
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children are going to be hysterical because they always want
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me to make rocket Crumpy during the year. They love
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it as a snack, and I don't want to do it.
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I'm just too lazy. Now when they find out that
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I made more from treeta, oh my gosh, I will
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be in trouble. Let's not tell them. I won't tell them.
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You're right. But they were here, yes, and I said
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I'm making rocket Crumpy tomorrow. They all said they're coming
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this evening that says, don't you dare us done? It's
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our show exactly. So let me have the potatoes. Let's
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go to the potatoes. Okay, perfect.
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So it's about having nicely.
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Shaped even potatoes. At least the circumsis circum the circumference
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should be, you know, even so we don't have gaps.
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Or we're not peeling it afterwards.
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If you peel it before, by the time it's cooked
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very well, it's going to become too soft and it's
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going to fall apart. You know, the slices won't stay,
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won't stay whole. So I think we have too many potatoes.
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You don't have to cook all the potatoes, Okay, I don't.
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I see. I never made such a moments or another that. Okay,
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this is Shailah like everybody does. Hangs it up. It's
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supposed to be a prevention against my visiting your house.
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Tell us again. Yes, well, there was a we all know.
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Actually his your side was this past week. There was
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a very big scholar and a very big Toaldic and
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Hungary in the city Caristeer. He was extremely into helping
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other people, feeding them all the time. And actually what
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I heard and I'm sure it's true that when he
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was sick, and when he was a last of life,
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he was laying but very ill, and he sent messages
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to the people in the kitchen, please make sure that
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all the people they're probably going to be coming to
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a funeral soon, and make sure that there's enough food
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cook that they shouldn't, you know, be hungry. So and
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there was some I don't know if it's an old
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wife stale, but I'm comfortable believing it that somehow they
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once hung up a picture of him, and all the
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mie scattered, So everybody's hanging up pictures. My kids are
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laughing and making fun of me, but I don't care.
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It doesn't hurt to have a picture of It's because
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some people think it's an old wife stale, but we
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don't know. But the fact is I Borokasham, Thank goodness,
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I don't have any mice. Do I tribute to is official.
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But also that the exterminated spent two days closing up
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my os. So you know, there's a very famous saying.
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You know, I'll do the work and you'll do the
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mas and toy them, you know. So I did the
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work with the exterminator of silo does the math. And
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I want to tell you something, Rita. I know a
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lot of women who had nice husbands, but in every
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single way, you know, just from their discussions. Okay, this
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is perfect. I in all my many many years that
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I knew them and I knew of their husbands, I
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never I never heard from my friends and things that
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I knew about my husband. You know, they were very
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I didn't know anybody who had that kind of quality.
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You know, you don't like meat, So what do you
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eat you stay in such good shape? I don't know. Now.
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I had for lunch my daughter happened to have brought
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me shoes, hair. Last night you bought me very delicious
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potato salad and I had a slice half a slice
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of salmon. So that was fun, you know. And I
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make myself. I love split pea soup. Oh that sounds good.
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Yes, if I get Most women say you can keep
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your figure past men and falls.
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Listen. I tried very hard, and I worked very hard,
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and I was totally obsessed with weight all my life.
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Really yeah, I tell you why. When I was a
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young kid, I was never fat cause I had a
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good figure. I have a long waist and I had
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a long neck, and but I was a big person.
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And when I was about twelve years old, my mother
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took me to the doctor. I wasn't feeling well, and
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y you know, my mother went out while he was
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examining me. And then he tells me, says, you know, Giddle,
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you're such a good looking girl. Why are you fat?
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So I thought to myself, you know, I didn't care
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about what he said about the fat, but I think
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if he called me good looking girl, I must be good.
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Nobody ever told me I was good looking, you know.
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And and so I said, so what should I do,
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Doctor Diamond? I love to eat. He says, okay, says
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I'll give you something. And imagine, Frieda, you're talking about
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something that happened probably sixty four sixty five years ago. Mm.
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And he gave me a prescription for some sort of medication,
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really yes, to reduce my appetite like adderall. I don't
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remember what it was. I've no idea. All I know
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is that it was a controlled drug and you didn't
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need a license for it, and it cost to two dollars.
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And I didn't tell my mother. I went to the
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drug store and I got the medication and I took
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it and I became so abnormally hyper that I went
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through them with My mother had no idea why. But
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he also had a pen pal in England who I
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was fourteen years old, not even who who. I wrote
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her about it and she says, get to send me
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the medication. So I went to the pharmacy and asked
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for refill. But I imagine I hadn't even used it
243
00:12:54.080 --> 00:12:55.759
wasn't even thirty days past. They gave me ser this.
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They gave me refillm I sent it to London to
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my cousin. She was my cousin, my pen pal also
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and her mother called up my mother. Good, my mother's
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bird's cousin. She says, what did you get to send
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to my daughter? Ki? So my mother says, I'm not
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get what you're talking about. Yes, yes, get to send
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some medication. My daughter's off the wall. So the mystimulants absolutely.
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And then I had to tell my mother the truth,
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and my mother said she's gonna call it back to
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darme that I says, don't you dear, he didn't tell
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me not to tell you? And I says, the anyway
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does them? To make a long story short, of cause
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my mother threw into the coverage that with the end
257
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of my story. But up until the day, I always
258
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struggled Wah. I always wanted to be skinny, and I
259
00:13:38.759 --> 00:13:42.519
was skinny most of my life. But there were two
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things that I struggled with. But I was skinny, I
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00:13:46.120 --> 00:13:49.600
starved and every time I ate something which I shouldn't have,
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I had such guilt, Yeah, that I didn't enjoy my
263
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food ever. Yeah, and it kept me back from socializing. Yeah,
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you know, because if I went someplace and there was
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delicious food, you know. I remember I was a class
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hostess for Bicker Island party in Pupa for many many years.
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That is beautiful party the first day sleep hass you know,
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and I was my class's host and I had to
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go there and not touch a morsel off And everything
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00:14:12.519 --> 00:14:15.960
was dairy, the most delicious cheesecakes and blints and everything.
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And so most of the time I looked for an
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excuse not to go because I knew that self control
273
00:14:21.519 --> 00:14:23.720
was gonna be so much difficult to me. And at
274
00:14:23.759 --> 00:14:25.519
the end of the day it was felt imagine I
275
00:14:25.559 --> 00:14:27.639
missed out and said you good, delicious, you know. So
276
00:14:27.879 --> 00:14:30.720
this was a struggle all my life. At one point
277
00:14:31.559 --> 00:14:36.279
I s developed terrible, terrible pain my whole body. It's
278
00:14:36.279 --> 00:14:40.200
called fibermyalgia. Yeah, it's it's it's it's an order immune disease,
279
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and there there's really almost no cure for it. And
280
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I was suffering tremendously and the doctor gave me a
281
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pregnance on which is a steroid, and of course it
282
00:14:52.840 --> 00:14:56.159
made me feel much better. But I started gaining weight
283
00:14:57.360 --> 00:15:02.039
and then I developed chronic critigue syndrome. Wow to those
284
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an ordinance, and that was also a disaster. And so
285
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I was on the spreaduce someone for a year and
286
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I gave a lot of weight and I didn't eat
287
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more much. It just blew me up terribly and I
288
00:15:12.080 --> 00:15:15.480
was miserable. And then one day I decided, you know what,
289
00:15:16.360 --> 00:15:19.000
too bad to pain. I'd rather suffer. I don't wanna
290
00:15:19.039 --> 00:15:22.120
die in all of that woman, you know. Wow, So
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00:15:22.600 --> 00:15:28.879
I I weaved myself off the present zone. Wyah. And
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00:15:28.960 --> 00:15:34.360
you know I suffered, but the weight didn't go. The
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00:15:34.360 --> 00:15:36.600
weight didn't go. No, I was not able to lose
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weight on me. Whatever I did, you know, pound here
295
00:15:38.480 --> 00:15:40.840
and a pound did there? Was I It was terrible.
296
00:15:41.320 --> 00:15:45.240
So then I went on a very very strict diet,
297
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and I lost sixty pounds.
298
00:15:48.360 --> 00:15:52.159
Aw, you're definitely slimmer than you were in your youth.
299
00:15:52.919 --> 00:15:54.600
I'm not slimmer than I was when I got married.
300
00:15:54.600 --> 00:15:56.399
I'll show you a picture of me in my wedding dress,
301
00:15:56.440 --> 00:16:01.279
you know, but I'm I'm slimmer now than I I was.
302
00:16:01.639 --> 00:16:03.600
I was December when I was very young, you know.
303
00:16:04.200 --> 00:16:04.960
Yeah.
304
00:16:05.000 --> 00:16:07.320
And you know, if I'll show you some pictures of
305
00:16:07.320 --> 00:16:09.039
me and my children's wait and I always you know,
306
00:16:09.080 --> 00:16:11.919
I was, I looked very good, you know. But those
307
00:16:12.279 --> 00:16:14.919
those sixty pounds that I lost, no matter what I did,
308
00:16:15.000 --> 00:16:18.120
I could not get rid of it, you know. And
309
00:16:18.679 --> 00:16:20.919
so but fine, And then then my husband got sick,
310
00:16:21.320 --> 00:16:24.639
and then of course I didn't lose it because we
311
00:16:24.679 --> 00:16:27.279
didn't eat normal. I didn't cooclean in the hospital every day,
312
00:16:27.519 --> 00:16:29.240
and before we came home, either I went into the
313
00:16:29.240 --> 00:16:32.200
big home room and I got myself a a bagel
314
00:16:32.240 --> 00:16:38.679
sandwich or I or I or came home and bought something,
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you know, out So.
316
00:16:40.080 --> 00:16:45.240
Can I ask why you you have uh a roll later?
317
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Why you walk with a because a bm it's a ferrari.
318
00:16:50.200 --> 00:16:54.480
It's a ferrari. Because when I had chronic fatigue syndrome.
319
00:16:55.200 --> 00:16:57.879
I I was sick for about ten years and it
320
00:16:58.000 --> 00:17:02.399
was very very sour cream it was and the cream cheese,
321
00:17:02.399 --> 00:17:07.920
and it was very very bad. And so I spent
322
00:17:08.599 --> 00:17:10.359
I don't remember if it was eight or ten years
323
00:17:10.359 --> 00:17:14.039
of my life. I spent sitting on the couch. I
324
00:17:14.079 --> 00:17:16.200
got up in the morning to me and my husband
325
00:17:16.200 --> 00:17:20.240
would barely manage to get me dressed and drag me down.
326
00:17:20.279 --> 00:17:22.559
I had a car taking me to Williamsburg every day
327
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to work, and I sat at work. I was working
328
00:17:27.279 --> 00:17:30.279
on a computer, and I came home and I sat
329
00:17:30.359 --> 00:17:33.039
on a couch like a bump on a log, every
330
00:17:33.079 --> 00:17:35.559
single day of the week. I'm telling you, I don't
331
00:17:35.559 --> 00:17:38.119
remember how many years it was, but many many years.
332
00:17:38.680 --> 00:17:43.799
And I damaged my The core of my body, the
333
00:17:43.880 --> 00:17:46.440
muscles and my core of my body were very very damaged.
334
00:17:46.519 --> 00:17:49.720
No access. Before that. I spent years and years. We
335
00:17:49.720 --> 00:17:52.480
were just discussing with fake and Pearl. We walked every
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single night. We were the first brisk walkers, and we
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00:17:55.599 --> 00:17:59.920
did it for many many years besides Tish above night
338
00:18:00.000 --> 00:18:02.119
and Kipper Night every single night of there, you know,
339
00:18:02.599 --> 00:18:05.400
and we were very fit. And then I just stopped
340
00:18:05.400 --> 00:18:09.640
moving and then this part of my body, the core
341
00:18:09.799 --> 00:18:13.720
of my body, became very very damaged. The muscles completely
342
00:18:13.759 --> 00:18:17.000
room and my back is perfect. I went to nurologists
343
00:18:17.000 --> 00:18:20.200
and spine specialists. My back is thousand percent perfect, nine hundred.
344
00:18:20.720 --> 00:18:24.440
This is completely damaged. This part of the body helps
345
00:18:24.440 --> 00:18:27.759
the spine upright. You know, it's just the spine. Since
346
00:18:27.799 --> 00:18:32.599
this is not working, I can't do this independently, you see.
347
00:18:32.960 --> 00:18:35.480
You know. It's like like you're trying to peel potatoes
348
00:18:35.480 --> 00:18:38.160
with one hand, so you're holding you understand, holding the
349
00:18:38.200 --> 00:18:41.880
peel and the potato together doesn't work. So after about
350
00:18:42.079 --> 00:18:45.359
five steps or fifty seconds, I feel where my chest
351
00:18:45.400 --> 00:18:48.079
is pushing up to my lungs. See I'm already starting
352
00:18:48.079 --> 00:18:50.599
to get out of breath now. Ah see. So the
353
00:18:51.079 --> 00:18:53.920
role later keeps me upright. It doesn't help me walk.
354
00:18:54.119 --> 00:18:56.559
All it does is it doesn't let me bend over,
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00:18:56.799 --> 00:19:00.119
bend over, and you know, and that's it, and that's
356
00:19:00.160 --> 00:19:02.440
how you get around all.
357
00:19:02.319 --> 00:19:04.880
Over you're everywhere you're going to Manhattan.
358
00:19:05.240 --> 00:19:07.200
I want to tell you something. My lab where used
359
00:19:07.359 --> 00:19:09.759
you know, where I used to go on Manhattan was
360
00:19:09.839 --> 00:19:12.240
on Seventh Avenue and fifty seventh Street, right on the
361
00:19:12.240 --> 00:19:16.480
corner there was a train station with an elevator, and
362
00:19:16.519 --> 00:19:18.839
so at the corner I got into the elevator. When
363
00:19:18.880 --> 00:19:23.759
the weather was nice, I would I would start walking
364
00:19:23.839 --> 00:19:26.359
on the corner of Seventh Avenue fifty seventh and I
365
00:19:26.400 --> 00:19:28.680
would walk to the next station, and the next station
366
00:19:29.240 --> 00:19:31.400
and the next station, And as long as I was
367
00:19:31.440 --> 00:19:33.799
able to walk and the weather was nice, I would walk.
368
00:19:34.319 --> 00:19:37.559
And I would sometimes walk twenty twenty to twenty four blocks.
369
00:19:37.759 --> 00:19:39.720
I remember recently I happened to have been there with
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00:19:39.880 --> 00:19:42.160
you with my roll. Later, of course, only with my
371
00:19:42.240 --> 00:19:45.960
roll there I would walk. I would walk, and by
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00:19:45.960 --> 00:19:48.319
each station I said, no, I can go further, and
373
00:19:48.319 --> 00:19:50.640
I went from fifty seven seven to ten and seven
374
00:19:50.799 --> 00:19:52.319
talk about forty seven blocks STREETA.
375
00:19:52.480 --> 00:19:55.119
How do people react to you walking everywhere.
376
00:19:54.640 --> 00:19:57.039
With Well, they look, But I want to tell you
377
00:19:57.079 --> 00:20:00.359
something I try very hard. That people sometimes have very
378
00:20:00.359 --> 00:20:03.119
sad look poor you know, I look okay, I'm dressed, okay,
379
00:20:03.279 --> 00:20:06.960
you know, poor woman walking with this contraption, And the
380
00:20:07.000 --> 00:20:09.720
sadder they look, the bigger my smile becomes. By the
381
00:20:09.799 --> 00:20:13.440
time we pass each other a wave, it becomes okay.
382
00:20:13.480 --> 00:20:16.079
Now what I need is this. I don't remember if
383
00:20:16.119 --> 00:20:19.000
it was cotta cheese or not. Okay, we'll do it without.
384
00:20:19.039 --> 00:20:20.799
And if you have a problem, you can eat a
385
00:20:20.960 --> 00:20:24.359
teaspoon of cotta cheese.
386
00:20:25.039 --> 00:20:28.880
It's not easy to cook with someone shoving a camera
387
00:20:28.920 --> 00:20:29.480
in your face.
388
00:20:29.640 --> 00:20:32.240
Right, it doesn't bother me. I mean you're not in
389
00:20:32.240 --> 00:20:37.119
my way. Doing pretty good, it's looking good. When do
390
00:20:37.160 --> 00:20:39.759
we put the cream cheese? Next leap? Then we get
391
00:20:39.799 --> 00:20:43.279
another layer of potatoes? No, here, we get another cream cheese,
392
00:20:43.319 --> 00:20:47.119
Then we get another layer of potatoes. This is this
393
00:20:47.240 --> 00:20:52.960
is mega h this is mega Yeah. This is exactly
394
00:20:53.319 --> 00:20:55.319
how much saltier you'll have to give it me on
395
00:20:55.359 --> 00:20:57.759
my clean hand, because otherwise it's going to still give
396
00:20:57.799 --> 00:21:02.480
me just how about that? Just this much? No, no, no, no,
397
00:21:02.519 --> 00:21:06.279
let's way too little. Free Okay, more and more and more.
398
00:21:06.799 --> 00:21:08.119
I'm not gonna put the whole thing I need to
399
00:21:08.160 --> 00:21:20.640
have it. What about spices. I'm gonna put a little
400
00:21:20.640 --> 00:21:24.880
white pepper. Okay. Now what we're gonna do is lift
401
00:21:24.920 --> 00:21:33.279
this up. Okay, you see, brilliant kidneys. It was somebody
402
00:21:33.279 --> 00:21:36.000
in jail once, very very stupid man and once he
403
00:21:36.039 --> 00:21:37.839
says something hurry smart, that has them. How did you
404
00:21:37.880 --> 00:21:39.119
know that? He says kidneys.
405
00:21:42.160 --> 00:21:45.440
Okay, let me let me take it to the.
406
00:21:44.880 --> 00:21:55.720
Okay, now I'm gonna tie myself. I'll do it on
407
00:21:55.759 --> 00:22:00.720
my phone. Where is my phone? He here, Yes, yes, yeah,
408
00:22:00.880 --> 00:22:03.359
I'm gonna put it on for s for thirty minutes
409
00:22:03.799 --> 00:22:05.559
and then I'll check it and see what's going on.
410
00:22:06.119 --> 00:22:08.960
Let's sit down. Let's sit down. Well, I'll tell you
411
00:22:09.039 --> 00:22:16.759
what I did yesterday. N I wouldn't even people might
412
00:22:16.759 --> 00:22:18.920
think that there's something wrong with me. I'll give you
413
00:22:18.920 --> 00:22:22.519
an example what I did. There's a beautiful new outdoors
414
00:22:22.599 --> 00:22:27.279
mall that opened in Belmont Park in Long Island. It's
415
00:22:27.319 --> 00:22:31.519
called Belmont Park Village. And they were working and I'm
416
00:22:31.559 --> 00:22:33.839
I I see it advertisery for the last two years,
417
00:22:33.880 --> 00:22:36.039
you know, and it's almost completed, and but now it's
418
00:22:36.039 --> 00:22:38.200
completely completed. Not all the stores are open. And I
419
00:22:38.240 --> 00:22:40.440
was coollishing. He said, I like, I like these, you know,
420
00:22:40.519 --> 00:22:46.680
interesting you know, trips or or whatever you wanna call it,
421
00:22:46.720 --> 00:22:51.359
e expositions. I went with my friend, paid a lot
422
00:22:51.359 --> 00:22:53.599
of money to one Island. He waited first for three
423
00:22:53.599 --> 00:22:57.640
hours and we had the time of our life.
424
00:22:57.960 --> 00:22:59.000
Did you shop anything?
425
00:22:59.200 --> 00:23:02.960
I bought my solone, very pretty evening bag. I see yeah, sure,
426
00:23:04.200 --> 00:23:08.480
pretty pretty pretty. It was very it's a very high
427
00:23:08.559 --> 00:23:11.119
end bag. It was reduced by seventy percent. Let me
428
00:23:11.200 --> 00:23:16.200
show it for the posterity. This is really pretty. I
429
00:23:16.319 --> 00:23:18.640
like it. But you know thet is it's a gorgeous place.
430
00:23:18.640 --> 00:23:21.960
It's a village. It's an outdoor village, and and and
431
00:23:22.000 --> 00:23:24.359
it's like being in the country two hundred years ago.
432
00:23:24.359 --> 00:23:28.559
But everything's brand doing gorgeous. All the cobblestoned you know,
433
00:23:29.079 --> 00:23:33.000
walkways and the beautiful little cottage looking houses. Everything was
434
00:23:33.039 --> 00:23:34.880
high end than gorgeous. And it was quiet because the
435
00:23:34.880 --> 00:23:37.119
middle of the week the weather wasn't great and we
436
00:23:37.200 --> 00:23:40.200
had the time of my life. Okay, so you know
437
00:23:40.319 --> 00:23:41.839
things that I always come up with something.
438
00:23:41.920 --> 00:23:44.200
Do you not find that it's a struggle with your
439
00:23:44.400 --> 00:23:45.319
like your mobility?
440
00:23:45.480 --> 00:23:48.319
Absolutely not, absolutely not. Of course I work with my
441
00:23:48.400 --> 00:23:52.680
role later. But my feet are perfect freedo, you're not.
442
00:23:52.759 --> 00:23:55.839
We walked for three hours in that whole village, you know,
443
00:23:55.960 --> 00:23:57.759
to know you know what I even have it?
444
00:23:58.000 --> 00:24:00.680
I think, I oh, yeah, sure, so as long as
445
00:24:00.680 --> 00:24:02.240
you have your.
446
00:24:02.079 --> 00:24:05.319
Wo yeah you see, these are all high end stores.
447
00:24:07.160 --> 00:24:14.000
Massoni Kurt Geiger, coach, Roberto Cavali, La Coste Vi, the Westwood, Longhamp,
448
00:24:14.359 --> 00:24:19.559
the North Face, Aquasara, sung Glass, Lululemon. I'd go to
449
00:24:19.599 --> 00:24:21.880
the North Face, and yeah, well the north there has
450
00:24:21.880 --> 00:24:23.839
a lot of jackets, you know, but you know I
451
00:24:24.319 --> 00:24:26.319
have enough jackets anyway. No, but I liked it. I
452
00:24:26.319 --> 00:24:27.880
saw it, and I just liked it. I really went
453
00:24:27.920 --> 00:24:29.440
to see the place. I wanted to check it out.
454
00:24:30.119 --> 00:24:34.640
I completely related. Yeah, yeah, yeah really, And I still
455
00:24:34.640 --> 00:24:36.559
have to going to Macy's has the beautiful flower Show,
456
00:24:37.279 --> 00:24:39.200
and my daughter went today. She wanted to take me.
457
00:24:39.359 --> 00:24:40.480
She wanted me to go in, but I says, no,
458
00:24:40.519 --> 00:24:43.640
I'm not giving a procot plee. So that was that.
459
00:24:43.759 --> 00:24:46.079
But you know, like I should still go. Of course,
460
00:24:46.359 --> 00:24:48.680
I'm telling you, I'm an adventurous person. You know. That's
461
00:24:48.720 --> 00:24:52.359
sometime they're do an overnight in the hospital, and you know,
462
00:24:52.440 --> 00:24:54.759
I can have a car coming back to Brooklyn. Sometimes
463
00:24:54.759 --> 00:24:56.519
they just stay there till ten instead of leaving at
464
00:24:56.559 --> 00:24:58.759
seven thirty eighth, And I go to Manhattan. I spend
465
00:24:58.799 --> 00:25:01.079
the day in Manhattan, go to a museum, I go
466
00:25:01.160 --> 00:25:04.720
to I you know, I go to I go to
467
00:25:04.799 --> 00:25:08.000
Brian Park. I sit there and I read. Then they
468
00:25:08.079 --> 00:25:11.839
have before the holidays have all these beautiful booths, these artists,
469
00:25:12.160 --> 00:25:14.440
you know. And and they have one in Grand Central,
470
00:25:14.480 --> 00:25:16.519
they have one Brian Park, and they have one a
471
00:25:16.640 --> 00:25:20.359
Union Square East, you know. And I got back. Wow,
472
00:25:23.319 --> 00:25:25.960
well my husband, my husband was such a fan. You
473
00:25:26.079 --> 00:25:27.960
let me do whatever I want. Is it makes you happy?
474
00:25:28.039 --> 00:25:38.119
Says go you ready? I'm ready. Okay, let's see what
475
00:25:38.319 --> 00:25:45.440
it looks like. Perfect, gorgeous. Oh gorgeous. I think we
476
00:25:45.559 --> 00:25:52.200
have to make it. Chafuni cancel? Okay, how do we
477
00:25:52.240 --> 00:25:54.359
get it out? I'll get it out, don't Okay, I'm
478
00:25:54.359 --> 00:25:59.359
gonna give you a tree. We made a lot. I
479
00:25:59.400 --> 00:26:02.759
have to say good. We can give to everyone on YouTube,
480
00:26:02.799 --> 00:26:06.559
so keep I don't give the any don't give them
481
00:26:06.559 --> 00:26:09.880
my days because they won't have a drop left. We
482
00:26:10.000 --> 00:26:11.440
haven't tasted it yet, though.
483
00:26:13.440 --> 00:26:16.240
It smells so.
484
00:26:16.079 --> 00:26:19.000
Good, right, that's what it's supposed to do. Smell good
485
00:26:19.000 --> 00:26:21.240
of it. So let's wait over till the cools and
486
00:26:21.279 --> 00:26:23.519
you're nice. See I have I even said a very
487
00:26:23.519 --> 00:26:26.519
big shopping back for you. Wait a minutes and we'll
488
00:26:26.519 --> 00:26:28.680
see what happens. Okay, I have a question for you.
489
00:26:29.119 --> 00:26:32.200
Please, since you've shared so much, go ahead. Do you
490
00:26:32.279 --> 00:26:36.599
have any regrets in looking back in your life.
491
00:26:38.759 --> 00:26:43.119
I have one regret, but it doesn't haunt me. Why
492
00:26:43.200 --> 00:26:48.680
doesn't it haunt me? I'm I'm not such a I
493
00:26:48.720 --> 00:26:50.559
don't have so much self confidence. I think that you
494
00:26:50.599 --> 00:26:55.039
know that a mistake doesn't bother me. I was a
495
00:26:55.119 --> 00:27:00.160
very very good mother and a housewife. My kids were
496
00:27:00.359 --> 00:27:02.759
immaculately taking care of in every respect. You know. It
497
00:27:02.839 --> 00:27:05.640
was a very very functional house, and we had a
498
00:27:05.720 --> 00:27:07.960
very good home. You know, the relations you know, the
499
00:27:08.000 --> 00:27:10.240
relationship between my housing was very amicable. It was a
500
00:27:10.240 --> 00:27:15.640
peaceful house. But I focused too much on my perfectionism
501
00:27:16.440 --> 00:27:19.279
instead of spending more time, you know, giving my children
502
00:27:19.359 --> 00:27:23.279
quality time as the young children when they were you know.
503
00:27:23.359 --> 00:27:25.920
But you know, so when I see now my daughters,
504
00:27:26.480 --> 00:27:29.440
you know, they really spent quality time playing with their children,
505
00:27:29.839 --> 00:27:32.519
listening to the and I listened, you know. But when
506
00:27:32.559 --> 00:27:34.440
I think if I would have invested as much time
507
00:27:34.480 --> 00:27:38.960
in my perfectionism and all the craziness, you know, I
508
00:27:38.960 --> 00:27:40.960
don't know if they would be different. I have nice,
509
00:27:40.960 --> 00:27:44.440
good children. But I think now, you know, what was
510
00:27:44.480 --> 00:27:47.920
my what was my need to have everything be so perfect?
511
00:27:48.119 --> 00:27:51.480
You know, when I was in well, my house and
512
00:27:51.640 --> 00:27:55.359
my and my laundry and my children were dressed immaculately,
513
00:27:56.119 --> 00:27:59.799
and and I cooked, you know, every night. There was
514
00:28:00.519 --> 00:28:04.480
no shortcuts, never bought out, you know, never went to restaurants.
515
00:28:04.599 --> 00:28:06.440
I'm not saying we didn't treat the kids once in a while,
516
00:28:06.440 --> 00:28:10.759
but you know, I was very, very domesticated. And also
517
00:28:11.559 --> 00:28:13.680
I also was involved a lot in the community. I
518
00:28:13.680 --> 00:28:15.720
was involved when my children went to school with a
519
00:28:15.799 --> 00:28:19.240
ladies auxiliary, with the school program, with the cater and
520
00:28:19.559 --> 00:28:22.200
I went a lot, you know, collecting tadakka for the
521
00:28:22.279 --> 00:28:25.599
d shivas and the schools, you know. And I remember
522
00:28:25.599 --> 00:28:27.680
I once heard a speech from the tailor at Rabitson
523
00:28:28.079 --> 00:28:30.559
and you said, you know, mother's it's very very wonderful
524
00:28:30.599 --> 00:28:33.000
when you're doing hest and midfist, but the biggest hess
525
00:28:33.000 --> 00:28:34.920
it is that when children come home from school, be
526
00:28:35.000 --> 00:28:39.039
home and be patient, and don't run the hospital and
527
00:28:39.119 --> 00:28:41.119
don't cook, cook in the bigger colingn rooms, he says,
528
00:28:41.119 --> 00:28:43.799
you know. And that came back to haunt me later,
529
00:28:43.920 --> 00:28:45.400
you know. And I did a lot of that. I
530
00:28:45.440 --> 00:28:47.759
went out at night, you know, to weddings, you know,
531
00:28:47.799 --> 00:28:51.039
to collect money for the eshiva, for bigger column. And
532
00:28:51.799 --> 00:28:54.039
I was also very involved. I was the oldest daughter
533
00:28:54.039 --> 00:28:57.720
in my family. I had an older brother, and there
534
00:28:57.759 --> 00:29:01.400
were some issues, you know, among my siblings, and everybody
535
00:29:01.400 --> 00:29:03.680
came to me because I was the oldest, almost oldest,
536
00:29:04.039 --> 00:29:07.039
and I spent a tremendous amount of time helping my
537
00:29:07.160 --> 00:29:09.160
siblings when I should have been there a little more
538
00:29:09.200 --> 00:29:13.480
for my children. And you know, that's really my only regret.
539
00:29:14.039 --> 00:29:17.519
You strike me as the ultimate extrovert. You're like thriving,
540
00:29:17.559 --> 00:29:19.759
You're always going to weddings, You're going to things.
541
00:29:19.799 --> 00:29:23.200
Now, well, I'm not an introverted person by sure, but
542
00:29:23.400 --> 00:29:26.319
interesting left. I'm also a very private person to a
543
00:29:26.319 --> 00:29:28.400
certain extent. There are times and I don't want to
544
00:29:28.440 --> 00:29:32.079
see people for days, or I could live in an island,
545
00:29:32.119 --> 00:29:36.640
you know, in that sense. No, I you know, it's
546
00:29:36.720 --> 00:29:38.599
very stuper to me to say about myself, but I
547
00:29:38.599 --> 00:29:41.559
think I must have had a soft heart because all
548
00:29:41.559 --> 00:29:43.359
the things that I did was was you know, because
549
00:29:43.400 --> 00:29:46.599
I was. My thought was I'm helping other people. But
550
00:29:46.680 --> 00:29:50.119
the tale Revins said, charity in the home, you know.
551
00:29:50.680 --> 00:29:53.480
But when I found that, you know, But that's the
552
00:29:53.519 --> 00:29:56.240
only regret. But I'm telling you I never missed a pta.
553
00:29:56.400 --> 00:29:59.920
I never missed any kind of intervention when my children
554
00:30:00.000 --> 00:30:02.079
probab we went all out for my children's schools and
555
00:30:02.119 --> 00:30:05.359
my husband, I mean, he was fantastic. I had four
556
00:30:05.400 --> 00:30:07.839
boys to get tea sheebas and as you know a
557
00:30:07.839 --> 00:30:09.799
little bit of my family, there were the round hole
558
00:30:09.839 --> 00:30:11.480
in the square peg, you know, they didn't fit in
559
00:30:11.559 --> 00:30:14.079
right here, and it was really a lot of hard work.
560
00:30:14.640 --> 00:30:16.640
But my husband was a fab you know, like I
561
00:30:16.680 --> 00:30:19.000
feel in hindsight that my husband made up for it
562
00:30:19.039 --> 00:30:21.319
in a lot of ways. So that's why they turned out,
563
00:30:21.440 --> 00:30:24.920
you know, okay. And but other than that, I was
564
00:30:25.000 --> 00:30:27.720
very good to my parents only because I felt sorry
565
00:30:27.720 --> 00:30:30.799
for my mother. You know, my mother had canninder eleven children.
566
00:30:31.200 --> 00:30:34.440
My mother was also very, very domesticated. She wasn't that
567
00:30:34.480 --> 00:30:36.759
one of those strong women, you know, she worked hard,
568
00:30:36.799 --> 00:30:39.920
and so I was the very there for her as
569
00:30:39.960 --> 00:30:41.680
a child and as a grown up and as an
570
00:30:41.680 --> 00:30:46.240
older woman. And so I know that I didn't I
571
00:30:46.319 --> 00:30:48.880
didn't tune in enough to my children for selfish reasons,
572
00:30:49.519 --> 00:30:52.359
you know, So I did great. No, No, what I'm
573
00:30:52.400 --> 00:30:54.039
trying to say that I don't feel guilt in a
574
00:30:54.079 --> 00:30:55.720
way that you know, what did I do that I
575
00:30:55.759 --> 00:30:59.359
couldn't utilize my time? You know me, you know, I
576
00:30:59.640 --> 00:31:01.599
gave the others, you know, and I don't regret that,
577
00:31:02.000 --> 00:31:05.319
you know, and and but you know, but when I
578
00:31:05.359 --> 00:31:07.519
think now, if I would do it over again, I
579
00:31:07.519 --> 00:31:08.680
would do it a little differently.
580
00:31:10.680 --> 00:31:21.519
All right, Oh my god, oh my god.
581
00:31:21.559 --> 00:31:26.039
It's right, it's good. It is really good. Yeah. I
582
00:31:26.079 --> 00:31:28.240
think one thing next time, when you're going to do it,
583
00:31:28.279 --> 00:31:31.440
make the slices a little thiner with the potatoes. I think, yes,
584
00:31:31.519 --> 00:31:33.640
you know that you should you should feel that, you know,
585
00:31:33.720 --> 00:31:35.720
not the potatoes the main ingredient that you know, the
586
00:31:35.720 --> 00:31:39.000
eggs are also, you know, as prominent as the potatoes
587
00:31:39.039 --> 00:31:40.799
and the whole thing. This is the first time I
588
00:31:40.839 --> 00:31:44.519
have it with a cheese. Yes, you know, it's a
589
00:31:44.559 --> 00:31:48.000
different it's a different feeling and taste. My mother put
590
00:31:48.200 --> 00:31:52.440
bread crumbs on top soon she took it out of
591
00:31:52.440 --> 00:31:58.799
the oven, or when she served it before. And well,
592
00:31:58.799 --> 00:32:00.759
that also looks, you know, it looks like a nice finish.
593
00:32:01.240 --> 00:32:03.079
I do that when I make you know, a noodle
594
00:32:03.119 --> 00:32:08.200
coogle or exactly. That was the idea. That's good. This
595
00:32:08.759 --> 00:32:12.440
was the best. And the pummis you know. I did
596
00:32:12.480 --> 00:32:17.039
not tell Pearl Baby, really no, because I want I
597
00:32:17.079 --> 00:32:19.160
want them to I want proto god in YouTube and
598
00:32:19.200 --> 00:32:19.839
combat you.
599
00:32:20.039 --> 00:32:21.319
Okay, let's not tell them.
600
00:32:21.799 --> 00:32:25.160
I'm not telling them. Let's not tell them until to.
601
00:32:25.200 --> 00:32:27.079
Get a rocket crump in surprise.
602
00:32:27.240 --> 00:32:29.200
Yeah, and she said, and you didn't tell me about it.
603
00:32:29.279 --> 00:32:33.000
We talk every day, or you didn't tell me about it.
604
00:32:33.000 --> 00:32:37.079
It's perfect. Thank you Rocket Group. You don't let anybody
605
00:32:37.079 --> 00:32:43.799
do a hold up on Yeah, no, are you kidding?
606
00:32:44.079 --> 00:32:47.640
I will? I will buy them as come on, hold on,
607
00:32:47.880 --> 00:32:53.559
hold on, okay o, my god, I can not think
608
00:32:54.240 --> 00:32:58.880
this was thank you enough. Let me see it absolutely