Don't Become a Clone: How Associate Advisors Develop Their Own Style

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Back to another episode of the Root Ready Podcast.
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At Root Financial, we have a structure, a team structure, where every lead has a dedicated associate.
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So if you're an associate advisor, you're not working or supporting three leads or five leads, as may be the case in some firms.
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You have a dedicated lead advisor who you are learning under and supporting.
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So the topic of today's episode, what Eden and I are going to talk about, is how can you, as an associate advisor, both learn from your lead to see what they do really well and adopt that and incorporate it into how do you do things, but also develop your own voice and develop your own way of being as you are on that path to becoming a lead advisor.
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So, Eden, as we as we jump into this, what do you like, what's the natural temptation?
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So you see associates at root, you've seen associates elsewhere.
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Do you get the sense people feel like I have to be exactly like my lead advisor if I'm going to make it?
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Or do you see people on the flip side of, you know, when I'm a lead, I'm going to do things way differently than my advisor does them?
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I would say in my experience, and it is kind of company to company, there's this tendency to ensure you're explaining things exactly the way either the company would want you to, the highest level person at the company, or your lead advisor, and it has to be perfect also.
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I feel like that's the general feeling as an associate.
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I have to say this perfectly and exactly the way the CEO would want me to say this.
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What's an example of that?
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Of just that feeling of I want to say that.
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Like is it specific words, Eden?
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I want you to say these specific words at this specific time, or is it more a general say things from this framework and kind of modify within it?
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I think it is kind of an exact script kind of feeling, especially early on.
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I need to say this and remember exactly how my lead answered that question, exactly how my lead presented this, and I need to repeat that exactly, kind of like a script, like rehearsing.
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Yeah.
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Yeah, interesting.
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It's and you know, I I know you have experiences.
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I've I have experiences with that.
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I remember my one of my first jobs, the advisor I was working under, hyper, hyper, hyper relational, like awesome, nice guy, easy to connect with, really struggled to uh say things directly.
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You know, I was like, I think it was such a great experience for me because I am way more analytical.
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What's the math?
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What's the answer?
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How do you solve the problem?
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And what my weak spot was, especially getting into this industry, was the connection piece, the relational piece, the how do you not just have the right answer, but connect that to the real world scenario that's going on that's messy and sticky, and it's there's human emotion involved, and there's all that stuff.
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And so it was such a formative experience for me of going to work under someone who, in many ways, was the complete opposite of me, of um really strong at the relational piece, asked great relational, like personal questions, made people feel seen, made people feel understood, made people feel like, hey, I'm really liked, like this person really likes me.
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Amazing qualities.
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And on the flip side, there was areas where, like, hey, struggled to deliver direct feedback, struggled to tell people like the right answer, struggle to, hey, if the markets are falling, I can't be disliked by my client.
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Like James, you called them back, James U sent the email, James.
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And and it was a great experience, like one of the absolute, I could not imagine a better experience for me because I was able to observe it and say, okay, what are the things this advisor's doing really well?
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How can I learn from that?
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What are the things this advisor's not doing well?
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And and I think are frankly counterproductive.
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How can I learn from that too?
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You know, it's kind of like when you're a kid, you're like, man, I would never do that if my, you know, that thing my parents do.
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Like I wouldn't I have it all figured out, I would never do it.
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And it's, you know, as you know, I have two young children now.
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And as you start talking to other peers and people who also have kids, like it this conversation kind of comes up a lot of it's so easy to look at parents and see, what did they not do?
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It's like, well, you have to ask yourself the other side of the question.
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Like, what did they do really well that I just failed to appreciate because I took it for granted?
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And like it's just part of what I received without ever knowing it.
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And I think that there's a similar element here with advisors of as you're an associate, you're not gonna have the same exact style as your lead.
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But how can you look at what they are and say, wow, what could I like?
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How can I be like this is an active act.
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This isn't just a sit there passively and absorb it via osmosis, but actively look at what I could learn from this individual because they do it so well.
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And also, what are the areas that either just because it's personality difference or I just frankly think like that they're doing it incorrectly, I could do better.
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So we're gonna talk today, Eden, about some of the principles around that and how associates can do it.
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But curious, you know, as you are working with Naomi, what what what experiences do you what do you see as like, man, I could learn so much from you fill in the blank.
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Yeah.
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So first and foremost, I just have to say it has been a tremendous learning experience just watching her practice, watching how she manages her clients.
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Um, and I think I've learned a lot from her about how to be calm and confident.
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She is so calm, so collected, very confident with her clients.
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And, you know, you can learn any of the technical stuff.
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You can learn how to present the Sequoia process.
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We got, of course, we're gonna learn all of that from her.
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But I've been really impressed with her, and I kind of am striving now to be more of that calm-centered and collected person.
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She's just, I think that's been something I've seen that I can really take from her, is just any question that comes her way.
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It's never this frazzled freak out.
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She's really great at taking a pause, taking a beat, staying centered, focus on the question.
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And the client feels that too.
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And I think it just builds a lot of trust.
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So I think that's what I've learned the most from her, just in observing over the past three months how she handles her meetings.
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Yeah.
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Yeah, fantastic.
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And I think I'm gonna break this down into three pieces, or at least I think of it in three pieces.
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Anytime when an associate is learning from their lead, and this is not just an associate lead principle, like this could just be a life principle.
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But I think there's gonna be behaviors that lead has are gonna fall under three buckets.
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One is exactly what you just described.
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Wow, that's awesome.
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Like that behavior is awesome.
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I want to adopt it myself.
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Two is hey, what they're doing, it's it could be good, it could be bad.
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It's just it's like a personality thing.
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It's not like you're doing it right or wrong.
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It's just that's a personality thing, but it's not me.
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Three is I don't think they're doing that right.
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Like I think there's actually a better way to do it, and I'm gonna actively try to see how can I develop in that area so that when I become this person, um I do it really well.
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Like I just shared, I shared with my previous experience with a previous advisor I worked under.
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There were some things that I actively worked to try to get better at because I was not good at them.
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There were some other things that I said, um you can do this, can be done better.
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I'm gonna do this better when I become a lead.
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This is not how I want to do it.
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But then there's that middle area of it's not good or bad.
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Like it can be a really good thing.
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I'll use Ari as an example.
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You know, when Ari joined root, he was my associate advisor, amongst many other things.
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He was like, James, I'm just gonna copy word for word exactly what you say while I find my own voice.
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And now, like you would have no idea because you, if you look at Ari, you look at me, in some ways we couldn't be further apart in terms of like personality, how we engage, how we interact.
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He's high energy, energetic, funny, stories, all this stuff.
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I'm a little bit more of that call it steady, collected, calmer, deliberate.
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And it's like he didn't become Ari overnight.
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He said, I'm gonna learn by doing this, I'm gonna learn by copying, and over time develop my own voice.
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So I think of that as like category number two of what I'm doing isn't right or wrong.
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It's just my personality.
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What Eden's observing in Naomi, some of these things aren't right or wrong.
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It's just Naomi's personality.
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Eden has a different personality.
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So do you do you see things in your interactions with Naomi even?
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They're like, wow, she does really well with that.
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That's just probably not me as I where where do you see your personality and how you want that to be more developed as you come into your voice as a lead advisor as you're developing?
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Yeah, I definitely see some similarities with what you just described with your dynamic with Ari early on, because I am a little bit more in that kind of Ari space where my voice goes up and down a lot.
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I do get excited, and that can sometimes be a little abrasive, though.
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So, but it is still my personality.
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So I think you're striking the right tone here with it, it is a balance of they're hiring you for who you are as well as your knowledge.
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And so it is important to be your authentic self and find a way to make your voice your own.
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Um so I think we do have kind of a similar dynamic there where she's just generally a little bit more of an even-tone person, but I see the way that that resonates with clients, and that also depends on the clients, of course.
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We could do a whole other episode on how to relate to your clients based on their personality types, but I feel like sometimes being a little bit, you know, too excitable, amped up can kind of scare clients off.
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And I've just noticed it really has resonated well when I've been watching her be that kind of even, calm presence for clients.
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So it's not really about it's not changing your personality, but sometimes it's even just your tone, just adjusting how I deliver things.
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And I think that's been really valuable, just watching her tone, how she senses the emotions in the room and kind of adjusts her energy accordingly, which is something I have a lot of room to develop in.
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Yeah.
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Yeah, awesome.
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Well, I think that awareness piece is big.
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Because I think the the first principle that I would make, or the first thing is adopt this mindset of studying everything.
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And that doesn't mean that everything in life is now all of a sudden work, but it's just develop this curiosity.
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Did you see someone deliver a speech that you thought that was really good?
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Like enjoy it, but also ask yourself, why?
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What made that good?
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What was it a story they told?
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Was it their pacing?
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Was it something else?
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Um, maybe a friend told a strike.
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Like, that was really funny.
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Like you, people's, you captured everyone's attention.
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Why?
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Like, as you start to develop this curiosity, I'll give a couple of examples.
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I was at an altruist conference uh, I don't know, a month ago.
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And one of the keynote speakers, her name was Jenna Lang, I believe.
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She had incredible stage presence.
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Like beyond what she said, take take her words out of that.
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If you were just watching video of her giving her speech, you would have been really impressed.
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And and I I noticed it because if you've ever given a speech in front of people, the first thing that goes through your head is like, what the heck do I do with my hands?
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Do I stick them in my pocket?
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Do I fold them?
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Like it's just this awkward thing if you're not holding a microphone.
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What do I you just you're so self-conscious about what are my hands doing?
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They're almost like have this life of their own and um it's distracting.
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And so I was like, wow, she is real, she's got this amazing stage presence.
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And so I was just, I was curious, like, okay, how is she standing?
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What's she doing with her hands as she moves across the room?
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She's doing it with intention.
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And it became this thing of, okay, I'm not just gonna enjoy what she's saying and take that in.
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I'm also gonna be observing why is she so effective in what she's doing so I can learn from that.
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Um a couple weeks ago or a few weeks ago, I released an episode on this podcast.
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And it was something about how to speak with authority as a young advisor.
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And it wasn't just the words you say, it was the way in which you say them.
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Speaking low and slow, ending on a downward inflection.
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Uh, you know, a few other uh things like that.
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And Grace messaged me after and she said, Hey, thank you.
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Like that was an awesome podcast.
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You know, we've been doing a lot with Carl Richards.
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He came and he spoke at our team event.
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He we've been part of the Society of Advice, it's been awesome.
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And she sent me out.
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She's like, I've been trying to figure out what makes Carl so compelling when he speaks.
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And she's like, that podcast helps so much because it kind of puts some it it framed, oh, that's what Carl's doing.
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He's speaking low and slow.
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He pauses for what can feel like an uncomfortable amount of time if you're the one pausing.
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But when you see someone else do it, you're like, oh my gosh.
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Like every pause, I feel like I'm getting a little bit closer.
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Like I'm drawn a little, like I'm on the edge of my seat with what am I going to hear next?
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He's not ending his sentences like a question.
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You know, he's ending his sentences with authority.
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And so I really appreciated Grace reaching out because it showed me, yeah, she's actively seeing, like, not just am I enjoying the content and taking it in, I'm studying what makes someone great.
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And I think that that's a mindset all of us can take, especially as we are in these conversations or sitting in these meetings with our late advisors.
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What makes Naomi so great in that situation?
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On the flip side, hey, maybe something happened with the client.
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Why was that?
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Maybe it didn't go exactly as Naomi was intending.
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Eden, I'm I'm, you know, I'm probably in a unique seat here.
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Well, I get to observe when you're Naomi, or you're the client, you're actively in it.
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You kind of have that 30,000-foot view of, okay, I can I can watch the client, I can I can perceive what they're feeling in a way that Naomi might not be, because she's the one delivering the message.
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And it's hard to be in the message and observing the message at the same time.
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But I think that's the first principle is adopt this curiosity, adopt this mindset of when I see things are going well or not well, I want to be curious and lean into that a little bit.
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Does that resonate at all?
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Does that connect anything that you see with that, Eden?
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I would absolutely agree with that.
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And I think we are in a very unique position as the associate for that exact reason.
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We're absolutely there to help.
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We're taking some notes down, we're paying attention to everything that's going on, but it does present a very unique opportunity because we are essentially a fly on the wall sometimes, especially early in your career.
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And I think early on as an associate, when you're observing the lead advisor presenting, you're probably most fixated on the content.
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How are they answering this question about the investment philosophy?
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How are they presenting the Monte Carlo?
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Those are things you maybe haven't even seen before when you're very early on in your career.
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But what you just said really resonates with me because I have seen this stuff before.
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I have exposure to this industry.
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And so I'm not necessarily sitting in these meetings.
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Of course, I'm interested in the content, what we're talking about, but there's this whole other area that you can learn from that almost has nothing to do with the content.
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It's about the delivery.
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And that's a whole secondary learning opportunity as an associate being a part of these meetings.
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If you know the investments, if you know the content, great.
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What else can we learn?
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And I think this is exactly it.
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It's the delivery, the tone.
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I took golf lessons maybe a decade ago because I was so bad at it.
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I said, maybe I'm going to try to get better.
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I don't like golf.
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I'm not great at golf.
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So someone who's actually into golf is going to listen to this and say, what you're saying is wrong, James.
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And I acknowledge I'm about to probably say a bunch of wrong stuff.
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But I remember that lesson, it was it, it wasn't a great instructor, I don't think, because it was like, here's what you do with your hips, and here's what you do with your wrists, and here's how what you need to do in the back swing, and here's where your eyes should be.
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Like I need to focus on one thing at a time.
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Like if you're trying to correct this total amateur's golf swing in one lesson by telling me how to do everything, it's gonna be horrible.
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So, in the same way as an associate, I do think that there needs to be this um start with just absorbing what they're saying.
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I think that's what you're talking about, Ian.
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Like, I'm starting by absorbing how are they explaining investment cons, or like, you know, what specifically are they saying it here?
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What are these?
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Then step two, layer two, is observe how they are saying it.
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So there's both the content, and I I say this all the time of as the advisor, you are both uh, you know, what matters is both the message and the messenger.
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So either when you're an advisor sitting across from someone, there's a message that you are delivering, but that message can only be effective if the messenger is effective.
00:17:22.000 --> 00:17:25.440
You could say the same words as the next person.
00:17:25.599 --> 00:17:27.519
The words are the exact same.
00:17:28.720 --> 00:17:32.480
They're not gonna come across the exact same, depending upon your.
00:17:32.720 --> 00:17:35.599
I say, like, you know, if you take Tony Robbins, for example.
00:17:35.839 --> 00:17:42.480
You know, everyone knows Tony Robbins, I don't know, the, you know, life coach, speaker, all these amazing things.
00:17:42.720 --> 00:17:49.680
The words he says, I could get up on stage and say the exact same words, they're not gonna land the same because we're different messengers.
00:17:49.759 --> 00:17:55.920
There's different lived experiences, there's different ways in which it's articulated and expressed and the tone and all those good things.
00:17:56.000 --> 00:18:02.160
And so I think that step one as an associate is yes, understand what it is said, what is said.
00:18:02.559 --> 00:18:05.200
Learn that, learn the technical aspect of it.
00:18:06.319 --> 00:18:11.119
Then really try to absorb how it's said because that becomes equally important.
00:18:11.200 --> 00:18:13.359
So I really like the point that you're making there.
00:18:13.599 --> 00:18:19.359
Um the next thing I would say, Eden, is actively engage.
00:18:20.559 --> 00:18:23.759
We work in a remote virtual environment here at root.
00:18:24.559 --> 00:18:35.200
When you're sitting in your 50th investment meeting or your 100th security meeting or your 75th kickoff meeting, it can be easy.
00:18:35.440 --> 00:18:36.559
Like, yeah, I know how this is gonna go.
00:18:36.640 --> 00:18:40.640
Yeah, I'm gonna be on the meeting, but I'm gonna be scrolling Instagram or I'm gonna be scrolling email.
00:18:40.720 --> 00:18:47.039
I'm gonna be scrolling Slack and you know, I'm gonna keep my eyes with them really slowly as I scroll so no one can see.
00:18:47.279 --> 00:18:50.640
But one, you're not gonna learn.
00:18:50.880 --> 00:18:52.799
There's always something we can learn.
00:18:52.880 --> 00:18:57.039
And the better we can adopt that mindset is stay engaged.
00:18:57.119 --> 00:19:00.559
Like that is such a good life skill to learn to stay fully engaged.
00:19:00.799 --> 00:19:08.559
Number two, like you're just you're you are conditioning your mind to need to be uh satisfied.
00:19:08.720 --> 00:19:10.480
I need new dopamine, I need new experience.
00:19:10.559 --> 00:19:16.799
I need to learn to calm down, like learn to just sit with something that's frankly can be boring at times.
00:19:17.039 --> 00:19:18.160
Vicky, I know how this is gonna go.
00:19:18.240 --> 00:19:19.200
I've run this a million times.
00:19:19.279 --> 00:19:22.319
But third, um, you're not gonna learn.
00:19:22.400 --> 00:19:25.359
If you're not, if you're just there, there's no point in you being there.
00:19:25.519 --> 00:19:35.839
Tell, you know, talk talk to your lead advisor and say, I know, like, can I just not I'm not doing anyone a service by being on this call if I'm just here actively scrolling other stuff.
00:19:35.920 --> 00:19:38.480
And this, I mean, this is a real thing in a virtual team environment.
00:19:38.559 --> 00:19:40.559
It's so easy to say, yeah, I've got my screen pulled up.
00:19:40.720 --> 00:19:41.680
But here's the other thing.
00:19:41.839 --> 00:19:49.119
As soon as you get quote unquote caught of Naomi says, hey, Eden, like I my internet just broke up.
00:19:49.200 --> 00:19:50.720
Could you could you step in here and say that?
00:19:50.799 --> 00:19:55.519
And Eden's like, oh geez, I have it, I've not been paying attention for 10 minutes because I've been responding to.
00:19:55.759 --> 00:20:01.920
All it takes is quote unquote getting caught once for that client to lose confidence or that lead to lose confidence.
00:20:02.160 --> 00:20:03.759
Oh, that person's not really here.
00:20:04.720 --> 00:20:08.480
I see their face, but they're they're not actually present.
00:20:08.559 --> 00:20:24.880
So that active engagement is a muscle all of us need to train because it's so easy to switch tabs, to switch context, to be here but not be here, it can very quickly erode trust when it becomes evident someone wasn't paying attention.
00:20:25.039 --> 00:20:30.559
And not to mention, you're not learning anything if you are just doing something else while that's going on.
00:20:30.799 --> 00:20:36.799
Um I've got a few more points, but what are the, I know you had some good thoughts on this too as we were going over the outline.
00:20:36.880 --> 00:20:47.839
What is in your experience, what should an associate be actively looking to do to both learn from their lead but also develop their their own voice as they are progressing?
00:20:48.640 --> 00:20:53.839
Yeah, I I would say just one point that piggybacks off of what you're just talking about.
00:20:54.079 --> 00:21:04.240
Maybe you have seen a hundred kickoff calls, and I'm gonna expand on this in a moment, but sitting there and feeling like, oh, I know exactly what they're gonna say, great.
00:21:04.799 --> 00:21:13.519
If you were then in the position where you had to run a kickoff call, it may not go very well, even though you've seen a hundred of them before.
00:21:13.680 --> 00:21:15.599
And that speaks to exactly what you're saying.
00:21:15.759 --> 00:21:17.519
Stay engaged, watch.
00:21:17.759 --> 00:21:29.920
Maybe it feels boring because you've seen it before, but being the one who has to be in the seat and lead the meeting is extremely different from sitting there and being like, oh well, I know exactly where they're going with this, I know what they're gonna say next.
00:21:30.240 --> 00:21:30.880
Great.
00:21:31.440 --> 00:21:32.720
What would you say?
00:21:32.960 --> 00:21:34.880
How would you run the meeting?
00:21:35.200 --> 00:21:42.079
And I think that is a huge part of helping your own development is first of all, just thinking about that.
00:21:42.240 --> 00:21:43.519
How would I answer this question?
00:21:43.680 --> 00:21:45.119
How would I present that?
00:21:45.440 --> 00:21:52.400
And then asking your lead for opportunities to practice and for opportunities to present little pieces of the meeting.
00:21:52.640 --> 00:21:54.240
Doesn't have to be the whole thing.
00:21:54.400 --> 00:21:56.640
And it can just be practice at first.
00:21:56.799 --> 00:22:07.440
Just, hey, do you mind if I pretend that you're the client and I I present this piece, your lead advisor will likely love that because they also want to coach, mentor, and develop you.
00:22:07.680 --> 00:22:09.759
So I think that's a huge thing you can do for yourself.
00:22:09.839 --> 00:22:16.799
Is first and foremost, like you said, stay engaged, listen, absorb how we do things here, absorb how your lead does it.
00:22:17.359 --> 00:22:19.039
But there has to be step two.
00:22:19.839 --> 00:22:20.720
How do I do it?
00:22:20.880 --> 00:22:22.319
How would I explain that?
00:22:22.559 --> 00:22:26.960
And there's really no way to get that unless you're hungry for it.
00:22:27.119 --> 00:22:32.000
You want it, you want the practice, you want the reps, and you do want to try it with clients too.
00:22:32.160 --> 00:22:34.720
It's very safe to practice with your lead, which I think is great.
00:22:34.880 --> 00:22:38.559
That's a great starting point, but it's gonna be you someday.
00:22:38.960 --> 00:22:40.960
So you have to get more comfortable with that.
00:22:41.119 --> 00:22:42.960
And it's good to do it early.
00:22:43.119 --> 00:22:44.480
That's not gonna come later.
00:22:44.720 --> 00:22:46.160
It it starts now.
00:22:46.799 --> 00:22:48.480
How do you and Naomi do that?
00:22:48.559 --> 00:22:49.680
Do you have a structured time?
00:22:49.839 --> 00:22:52.799
Do you just is it one-off practice sessions?
00:22:54.160 --> 00:22:55.200
It depends.
00:22:55.359 --> 00:22:59.680
Early on in the relationship, you know, the first month or so, she was like, let's just settle into root.
00:22:59.759 --> 00:23:00.640
Let me just show you.
00:23:00.720 --> 00:23:03.920
Let me just have you observe everything, take it in.
00:23:04.160 --> 00:23:14.559
And then our first client that I was gonna be a part of, the kickoff income, investment, the whole Sequoia process was the first time that I started to get the opportunity to be more engaged.
00:23:14.720 --> 00:23:18.319
And she was great about giving me that little nudge.
00:23:18.559 --> 00:23:21.279
Yes, you can present the net worth page and write capital.
00:23:21.519 --> 00:23:23.359
You're well equipped to do that.
00:23:23.519 --> 00:23:26.319
You know this client, you've been here from the start.
00:23:26.640 --> 00:23:28.079
Let's have you do that.
00:23:28.319 --> 00:23:32.720
And she's been great about checking in to make sure I'm not uncomfortable.
00:23:32.880 --> 00:23:38.640
She's pushing me to a point where it's going to be a complete failure and I will feel no confidence going forward.
00:23:38.799 --> 00:23:42.000
She's been great about making sure I am comfortable and confident.
00:23:42.160 --> 00:23:44.400
And part of that is giving me enough heads up.
00:23:44.640 --> 00:23:50.799
Hey, let's have you present this next meeting so that I can look at it, practice, practice with her.
00:23:50.960 --> 00:23:53.039
And then, you know, she checks in before the meeting.
00:23:53.200 --> 00:23:54.319
How are you feeling?
00:23:54.640 --> 00:23:57.680
Any last minute questions, nerves, anything you're feeling?
00:23:57.759 --> 00:24:01.759
You know, we'll meet 15 minutes or so before the meeting, just make sure we're all good.
00:24:02.160 --> 00:24:04.960
And I felt great and it went really well.
00:24:05.119 --> 00:24:14.640
And it's because she gave me the space, made me feel confident in my abilities, and gave me enough time to practice and feel comfortable with it.
00:24:14.720 --> 00:24:16.880
And it was a total win, an absolute win.
00:24:16.960 --> 00:24:21.759
And now I'm kind of eager to participate in future meetings and keep expanding my own voice.
00:24:22.240 --> 00:24:26.720
Well, I'm going to add to that, you were willing to do something that was a little bit uncomfortable.
00:24:26.880 --> 00:24:33.519
I think that's the part people miss of, oh, I can I can just sit in enough of these meetings and through the principle of osmosis, I will be able to do it.
00:24:34.079 --> 00:24:38.559
No, that will never, there's only so far observing can get you.
00:24:38.799 --> 00:24:42.240
But I think back to my own experience, the first time I actually met with a client.
00:24:42.640 --> 00:24:45.839
So my my old boss was a firefighter at full-time.
00:24:46.000 --> 00:24:54.079
So he would work, you know, two days a week or three days a week and be at the station, the drive down, you know, from the station to the office to actually take meetings.
00:24:54.240 --> 00:25:02.319
And one day, and I forget how long it was in, maybe a year in or two years in, he was supposed to take a meeting and I was going to be sitting in it just to observe in that associate role.
00:25:02.799 --> 00:25:04.480
Like, hey, James, there's there's tons of traffic.
00:25:04.720 --> 00:25:05.519
I was like, okay, cool.
00:25:05.599 --> 00:25:08.400
I'll call the client and tell them that we have to reschedule.
00:25:08.880 --> 00:25:10.720
So, no, why don't you just take it?
00:25:11.200 --> 00:25:16.480
And I was like, oh, like I, you know, like hated it.
00:25:16.720 --> 00:25:19.920
Like it was so nervous, was so felt so unprepared.
00:25:20.079 --> 00:25:20.799
But then I did it.
00:25:20.880 --> 00:25:22.720
And like the client, they had nothing but good feedback.
00:25:22.880 --> 00:25:25.039
I was like, oh, okay, cool.
00:25:25.279 --> 00:25:33.839
And then a couple years later, you know, he one of the ways that we would get clients is he would go teach social security seminars at local community colleges or different places.
00:25:34.400 --> 00:25:36.880
And I forget what I forget what it was.
00:25:36.960 --> 00:25:38.480
I think he was like, it was like a Friday night.
00:25:38.559 --> 00:25:39.680
The class was on a Saturday.
00:25:39.920 --> 00:25:43.839
I think he said, Hey, I forgot my son's flag football game is tomorrow morning.
00:25:43.920 --> 00:25:45.200
Can you go teach this class?
00:25:45.599 --> 00:25:47.920
He told me this on a Friday night and it's like the class was Saturday morning.
00:25:48.000 --> 00:25:49.440
And I was like, Teach a class.
00:25:49.519 --> 00:25:50.480
I'm 25 years old.
00:25:50.559 --> 00:25:52.640
What do I know about social security and this?
00:25:52.720 --> 00:25:55.279
And but again, it was like did it and it went well.
00:25:55.359 --> 00:25:56.160
And it's like, okay, cool.
00:25:56.240 --> 00:26:01.839
Like so it's you start to learn this lesson that um discomfort's a good.
00:26:02.000 --> 00:26:04.240
Like if you're feeling discomfort, good, it means you're growing.
00:26:04.319 --> 00:26:10.000
It's like running, you're you're trying to train to, I don't know, run a marathon, run a 5K, whatever.
00:26:10.240 --> 00:26:12.079
If you start running, you feel discomfort, good.
00:26:12.160 --> 00:26:13.039
Like, welcome to the game.
00:26:13.119 --> 00:26:14.960
Like that's that means you're getting stronger.
00:26:15.039 --> 00:26:18.559
That means you're developing, that means that you're going to be stronger for it.
00:26:18.720 --> 00:26:24.720
And we can fully appreciate that easily on the physical side, just because, yeah, you can see what running does or working out does or whatever.
00:26:24.880 --> 00:26:32.400
But I think we need to embrace that same mindset as professionals, that the emotional pain or the uh the discomfort.
00:26:32.640 --> 00:26:32.960
Good.
00:26:33.119 --> 00:26:38.079
That like that should feel like you know, you're on mile eight of a 10 mile run.
00:26:38.160 --> 00:26:42.799
And like that's the thing that's gonna propel you forward once you do it.
00:26:42.960 --> 00:26:56.559
So there's no uh what I think that you I would add to what you said is your willingness to embrace that discomfort is gonna be that additional thing, not just observing, but being able to say, now I'm gonna step into the game and actually do it.
00:26:56.799 --> 00:26:57.599
So I love that.
00:26:57.759 --> 00:27:02.240
Anything else you would add or any specific examples you'd give before we move on to the next point?
00:27:03.599 --> 00:27:07.440
I do just have a quick story, kind of similar to you getting thrown into things.
00:27:07.599 --> 00:27:13.039
But um, so that that first example I just shared was maybe a month, month and a half into me working here.
00:27:13.119 --> 00:27:16.880
You know, just very simple, basic net worth page and write capital great.
00:27:17.119 --> 00:27:26.079
And we had a more recent client who's been going through the Sequoia process, and I did the full prep for the investment meeting, and Naomi was asking, Hey, you you did this prep.
00:27:26.160 --> 00:27:30.000
Do you want to walk them through through reserves and portfolio analysis conversation?
00:27:30.160 --> 00:27:31.680
You built this, you did this.
00:27:31.839 --> 00:27:35.680
And my knee-jerk reaction was, uh, I don't know if I'm ready for that.
00:27:35.839 --> 00:27:37.200
And this was days in advance.
00:27:37.359 --> 00:27:38.400
She let me know.
00:27:38.559 --> 00:27:43.680
And she was, you know, again, encouraging, instilled confidence in my abilities.
00:27:43.920 --> 00:27:46.000
And so I went ahead and did it.
00:27:46.079 --> 00:27:49.599
And during this meeting, her internet completely went out.
00:27:49.759 --> 00:27:51.119
She dropped off the call.
00:27:51.359 --> 00:27:52.480
I didn't even notice.
00:27:52.640 --> 00:27:58.240
I was so into this presentation and connecting with the clients, I didn't even notice that she had dropped off the call.
00:27:58.480 --> 00:27:59.680
And it went great.
00:27:59.759 --> 00:28:00.960
It it was awesome.
00:28:01.200 --> 00:28:08.480
And I felt awesome after that experience too, just knowing, hey, if she does drop off the call, it's okay.
00:28:09.119 --> 00:28:12.480
It's okay to be a little nervous, a little scared, but you got this.
00:28:12.640 --> 00:28:14.559
And she really instilled that in me.
00:28:14.720 --> 00:28:18.000
So just one of those moments where things happen.
00:28:18.319 --> 00:28:18.720
Yeah.
00:28:18.880 --> 00:28:19.440
I love it.
00:28:19.599 --> 00:28:19.920
Yeah.
00:28:20.400 --> 00:28:20.799
Amazing.
00:28:20.960 --> 00:28:22.480
Very, very cool to see that you're doing that.
00:28:22.559 --> 00:28:27.119
And that Naomi's been so just great and supportive and coaching around that.
00:28:27.359 --> 00:28:29.839
Um, a couple other things that I would add.
00:28:30.000 --> 00:28:44.160
So, one, there's this concept of separate the principle from the personality of there are certain advisors that have habits that are effective because of who they are, not because like this is some universal principle that needs to be adopted.
00:28:44.240 --> 00:28:45.839
I'll go back to Ari for an example.
00:28:46.000 --> 00:28:48.160
He does some things that are really effective.
00:28:48.559 --> 00:28:52.640
I I would, they would not be effective if I did them with my personality.
00:28:52.720 --> 00:28:55.519
They would not be effective if other advisors did them with their personality.
00:28:55.599 --> 00:29:01.359
So separate the things that you know from your C Eden, what is Naomi doing that this is a good principle.
00:29:01.519 --> 00:29:06.960
The way that she speaks, the way that she sets an agenda, the way that she keeps money meetings running on time, the way that she articulates.
00:29:07.119 --> 00:29:08.960
These are principles that she does so well.
00:29:09.039 --> 00:29:13.279
And I, not just me, like all advisors could do well to adopt these.
00:29:13.519 --> 00:29:14.400
Maybe there's other things.
00:29:14.480 --> 00:29:18.400
Like this is really effective, but it's a personality thing of Naomi's.
00:29:18.480 --> 00:29:20.079
And I can realize that that's just gonna be different.
00:29:20.319 --> 00:29:21.759
That means it's neither good nor bad.
00:29:21.920 --> 00:29:28.559
It works for her, but I'm not gonna try to emulate that exactly as I step into the lead advisor role.
00:29:28.799 --> 00:29:35.279
And then finally, study where your advisor not just wins, but where do they lose?
00:29:35.440 --> 00:29:37.759
None of us are perfect, none of us are gonna bat a thousand.
00:29:37.920 --> 00:29:41.839
I don't just mean lose in the sense of, you know, didn't get that client.
00:29:42.079 --> 00:29:43.200
Well, that's certainly part of it.
00:29:43.359 --> 00:29:48.480
I mean lose, you know, that the way that that was explained, it was a miss.
00:29:48.640 --> 00:29:49.519
I think it could be better.
00:29:49.680 --> 00:29:52.559
I think that this is actually a great opportunity to do a couple of things.
00:29:52.720 --> 00:30:04.240
One of which is develop the ability to give feedback in a place like Root, where everyone is so positive and so encouraging and so helpful, that's fantastic.
00:30:04.319 --> 00:30:09.599
But the downside is sometimes people are like, man, if I'm giving feedback, I feel like I'm the one that's am I being negative?
00:30:09.680 --> 00:30:11.920
Like, am I drawing this, like am I bringing the mood down?
00:30:12.400 --> 00:30:18.799
So I think that we've gone, I don't want to say too far, like things are really positive.
00:30:18.960 --> 00:30:26.240
Like it it makes it sometimes harder to say, like, yeah, uh, you know, um, Naomi, would it be okay if I give you some feedback on on how that that call went?
00:30:26.400 --> 00:30:27.519
Like feedback's a gift.
00:30:27.599 --> 00:30:30.400
There is no chance that Naomi says, Eden, how dare you?
00:30:30.480 --> 00:30:46.000
How but it's scary to ask it because, man, you've been so supportive and all this, and that can create an environment where it's a good positive environment in general, but learning to give that feedback is gonna be super effective.
00:30:46.240 --> 00:30:55.200
It's gonna help you because sometimes you might say, Hey, and I'm just obviously using Naomi because she's your she's the lead advisor that you're working with of Naomi.
00:30:55.440 --> 00:30:58.559
I noticed when you, you know, when the client said that, you responded this way.
00:30:58.799 --> 00:31:04.400
I would have like you make the assumption deliver this because sometimes she might say, Hey, Eden, like great point.
00:31:04.559 --> 00:31:05.920
I said it because of this.
00:31:06.079 --> 00:31:08.079
And you might be, oh, I didn't consider this.
00:31:08.240 --> 00:31:09.359
Didn't like you're right.
00:31:09.440 --> 00:31:11.119
I think that actually was the right thing.
00:31:11.440 --> 00:31:13.519
Or she might say, Eden, you know what, you're absolutely right.
00:31:13.599 --> 00:31:22.960
Like I didn't even realize, I was thinking they were coming at it from this perspective, but from your vantage point and kind of being able to read their body language and read how the meeting had been flowing.
00:31:23.119 --> 00:31:23.839
You're absolutely right.
00:31:24.000 --> 00:31:26.079
They're coming at it from that vantage point.
00:31:26.319 --> 00:31:30.319
So it's simultaneously developing your learning as an associate.
00:31:30.480 --> 00:31:34.400
It's giving good constructive feedback that's gonna make your lead better.
00:31:34.559 --> 00:31:47.680
And it's just develop like the ability to deliver feedback is such a gift and such a skill set that as advisors, we need to have that because not every interaction with clients is gonna be sunshine and rainbows and butterflies.
00:31:47.759 --> 00:31:49.920
If everything's perfect, sometimes it's gonna be hard.
00:31:50.160 --> 00:31:54.000
Sometimes you're gonna have to tell people things they're not wanting to hear.
00:31:54.240 --> 00:31:57.920
And it takes courage to actually be able to say it directly.
00:31:58.240 --> 00:32:12.400
So if you can practice that as an associate, that is one of the best things that you can do to learn the print, like push back on the principles that you see to see where are the gaps and where is this just showing the limits of my own ignorance?
00:32:12.480 --> 00:32:16.400
Because when I push back on this, Naomi says, no, that's that was actually the right way to do it because of this.
00:32:16.480 --> 00:32:17.279
And okay, cool.
00:32:17.599 --> 00:32:20.960
That accelerated your learning in that aspect too.
00:32:21.279 --> 00:32:26.400
Any thoughts or pushback on any of that that you would give?
00:32:28.079 --> 00:32:30.160
No, I think you're you're spot on.
00:32:30.319 --> 00:32:36.319
And personally, I've always learned something by giving or receiving feedback.
00:32:36.480 --> 00:32:40.799
It's almost never unless it's you know delivered poorly, which is a separate issue.
00:32:41.119 --> 00:32:48.960
When constructive criticism and feedback is provided or given, I always learn something and improve because of it.
00:32:49.200 --> 00:32:57.440
So I think it's very important to be open to giving feedback and asking questions about why your lead does things a certain way.
00:32:57.759 --> 00:33:01.359
It's also important as you start presenting and taking on these pieces at the meeting.
00:33:01.519 --> 00:33:05.759
Every time I presented afterwards, I asked Naomi, how was that?
00:33:05.920 --> 00:33:07.119
Did I sound natural?
00:33:07.279 --> 00:33:08.240
Was it clear?
00:33:08.559 --> 00:33:10.319
What feedback do you have for me?
00:33:10.559 --> 00:33:11.599
And it's been great.
00:33:11.759 --> 00:33:18.000
Everything that she has given back to me has been super useful and things that I can take with me going forward.
00:33:18.559 --> 00:33:20.319
So I think that's really important.
00:33:20.559 --> 00:33:22.960
And we actually did practice that in the garden too.
00:33:23.119 --> 00:33:28.000
One week we each had to record just a take at our own advisor intro.
00:33:28.160 --> 00:33:30.480
Pretend you're a lead advisor, do your intro.
00:33:30.640 --> 00:33:40.000
And we were partnered up, sent them to each other, and the whole assignment wasn't to do your advisor intro, it was to give feedback on the other person's advisor intro.
00:33:40.160 --> 00:33:47.359
And it was very uncomfortable, but so important and so valuable, and we all learned from it.
00:33:47.599 --> 00:33:51.359
So you're spot on with feedback is a gift, both directions.
00:33:51.680 --> 00:33:52.559
Yeah, I love it.
00:33:52.799 --> 00:33:55.920
Once again, shout out Jeff and Paul for the garden.
00:33:56.000 --> 00:33:58.160
The garden's been awesome.
00:33:58.400 --> 00:34:10.960
Um, I think the last point that I would make, and I want to check to see if there's any other you would make, is I think that as an associate, you are not gonna know exactly what your voice is gonna be, Ashley.
00:34:11.039 --> 00:34:13.760
Like the way I speak now, I did not know this as an associate.
00:34:13.840 --> 00:34:14.880
Like, this is what I'm going towards.
00:34:14.960 --> 00:34:18.639
So don't feel like you need to know exactly who you are, how you're gonna sound.
00:34:18.719 --> 00:34:20.400
And by voice, I don't just mean like the tone of your voice.
00:34:20.480 --> 00:34:22.480
I mean like everyone's got their own unique voice.
00:34:22.559 --> 00:34:28.480
Like you could just the way they say things, the analogies, the metaphors, the the little quarks in what they say.
00:34:28.559 --> 00:34:30.719
Like, yeah, that's what makes you unique.
00:34:31.039 --> 00:34:38.719
So I think that there's a sense of earlier on focus on not just being a parrot, but being more like your, like, don't be afraid.
00:34:38.880 --> 00:34:43.119
So, yeah, if they say this, this is I'm gonna say it, because this is just, I'm starting to build the reps.
00:34:43.440 --> 00:34:49.840
And in the same way you can observe how your lead is interacting with clients, try to observe the way you are.
00:34:50.000 --> 00:34:55.519
Like the the a great skill set is to be able to be both first person and third person at the same time.
00:34:55.760 --> 00:35:01.920
You know, as I'm talking to Eden right now, can I both have this conversation and also be somewhat disconnected to say, how is this landing?
00:35:02.000 --> 00:35:02.719
How is this going?
00:35:02.800 --> 00:35:03.679
What could be better?
00:35:03.840 --> 00:35:05.119
Where am I rambling?
00:35:05.280 --> 00:35:07.199
Where do I need to add more context?
00:35:07.360 --> 00:35:10.000
And that just happens through repetition.
00:35:10.400 --> 00:35:13.760
So for people who are saying, Yeah, do I copy them?
00:35:13.920 --> 00:35:22.159
Do I for those just starting, the more likely you are just to say what they're saying as you're starting to deliver.
00:35:22.400 --> 00:35:32.000
As you give reps, as you start presenting, you'll start to say, okay, there's a different way that you do it, there's a different order that you do it, there's different stories that you tell, but that's gonna come over time.
00:35:32.079 --> 00:35:35.840
So you're not gonna think your way into your own advisor voice.
00:35:35.920 --> 00:35:42.239
You're gonna work your way into it through enough reps and practice attempts at doing this.
00:35:42.719 --> 00:35:57.360
Anything else, even that you would add in your see where you are that you think that associates would find constructive as they learn best practices from their lead, but also develop their own way and own voice as they go.
00:36:00.079 --> 00:36:00.559
Yeah.
00:36:00.800 --> 00:36:08.559
Um I think just kind of expanding on your last point there, it's so okay to borrow language early on.
00:36:08.719 --> 00:36:12.639
It's like borrowing metaphors, borrowing how things are said.
00:36:12.880 --> 00:36:14.079
That's how you start.
00:36:14.320 --> 00:36:21.199
You gotta start somewhere, and it'll just naturally kind of mold to your personality over time.
00:36:21.360 --> 00:36:29.119
I've even noticed it in my very short experience that I say things now differently than I did when I first started getting repetitions and practicing.
00:36:29.360 --> 00:36:35.840
And I would also say that's not gonna be perfectly fine-tuned by the time you you get that promotion, by the time you're ready to be a lead.
00:36:36.079 --> 00:36:37.440
It's not like, okay, I'm done.
00:36:37.599 --> 00:36:39.840
My voice is developed, perfect.
00:36:40.000 --> 00:36:43.280
Even Naomi has said to me, I'm still working on this.
00:36:43.440 --> 00:36:48.079
I'm still working on how I present this, I'm still working on X, Y, or Z.
00:36:48.639 --> 00:36:51.199
She's very open about I'm not perfect.
00:36:51.360 --> 00:36:56.239
I'm a human and I'm still developing my voice, even though I am a lead now.
00:36:56.400 --> 00:36:57.360
It won't be perfect.
00:36:57.440 --> 00:36:59.840
You're not gonna wake up one day and be like, that's my voice.
00:37:00.079 --> 00:37:00.480
Done.
00:37:00.639 --> 00:37:01.519
Work is done.
00:37:01.679 --> 00:37:03.440
It's kind of like just this whole industry.
00:37:03.599 --> 00:37:06.320
There's always more to learn and always more to develop.
00:37:06.480 --> 00:37:10.719
And I think your voice will continue to develop as long as you're an advisor.
00:37:10.960 --> 00:37:13.199
So that's something I just add there.
00:37:13.519 --> 00:37:14.079
Yeah.
00:37:14.400 --> 00:37:14.880
Love it.
00:37:15.039 --> 00:37:16.079
Well, thank you, Eden.
00:37:16.320 --> 00:37:18.800
Thank you, everyone, who is listening and watching.
00:37:18.960 --> 00:37:22.000
This has been another episode of the Root Ready podcast.
00:37:22.639 --> 00:37:24.639
That's it for today, and we'll see you all next time.