Staying Connected: Finding Purpose, Community, and Joy as We Age

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You're listening to Honestly Aging by Friends Life Care Vigor,
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a podcast where we explore what it's like getting older, the peaks,
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the valleys, and everything in between.
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In this season of Honestly Aging, we're exploring the many experiences that shape vibrant aging.
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I'm your host, Cheryl Proska. Let's grow old together.
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Today on Honestly Aging, we're talking about something that can have a profound
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impact on our lives as we grow older, staying connected.
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Our relationships, routines, health, and circumstances can change with age,
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but our need for friendship, community, purpose, and meaningful engagement doesn't go away.
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Joining me today are Chrissy Knappe from Uniper and Alexander Sandy Halperin.
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UNIPR helps older adults stay connected and engaged through live activities,
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wellness programs, peer groups, educational opportunities, and other experiences
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that can be accessed from home.
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Sandy is a UNIPR member and a longtime advocate for people living with dementia.
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After being diagnosed with early onset Alzheimer's disease in 2010,
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Sandy has spent years sharing his experience and advocating for greater awareness
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and understanding of what it means to live with dementia.
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Chrissy and Sandy, welcome to Honestly Aging. Thank you both so much for joining me today.
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Thank you for having us.
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Chrissy, I'd like to start with the bigger picture. Why is social connection
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such an important part of aging well?
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Yeah, that's a great question. So I think connection is one of those things
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that we sometimes underestimate until we see what happens when someone starts to lose it.
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And this is actually something that is really close to home for me.
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I had left my mom when I was pretty young. And after that, I really watched
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my dad's world slowly get smaller and smaller.
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He had a host of health issues, but there was also this enormous hole after he lost my mom.
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And I remember thinking at the time, you know, there's so many medical things
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that we can do to treat individuals.
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But what do you do? What do you prescribe for someone who's lonely?
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What do you prescribe for someone who's lost the person that they've spent the
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vast majority of their life with?
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And now doing the work that I do, I really understand how common that experience
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of loneliness and isolation actually is.
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And nearly one in four older adults who are living in the community nowadays
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are considered socially isolated.
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And it's not just about feeling sad or having someone to talk to.
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Social connection is very much tied to our overall physical health,
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our cognitive health, and even more so our sense of purpose,
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all of it. It's all encompassed within them.
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So when we talk about aging well, I think we need to talk about whether people
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still feel like they belong somewhere, where they have a place to feel like
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themselves, where people are expected to see them and they have something that
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they're really looking forward to.
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So for me, personally, connection isn't just a nice to have off to the side. It's foundational.
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And it really is one of the things that actually determines how well someone
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ages, not just how happy they are while they age.
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In addition to losing a spouse or partner, what are some of the other reasons
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that staying connected can become more difficult as we get older?
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Yeah, I think there's a lot of different things that can contribute to that.
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So as we age, you know, maybe driving gets a little bit more difficult.
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Mobility changes. Maybe, you know, there's an increased likelihood of a fall
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risk. Friends might move away or pass away.
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You know, people lose spouses. and maybe getting to the senior center that you
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used to be able to go to, it just, it doesn't feel as easy to get there anymore.
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You know, and I saw pieces of this with my dad too. My brother and I really
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loved him so much like crazy, but we also had lives and we were trying to juggle
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jobs and families and other responsibilities while we were caring for him at a distance.
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And so much of his day was spent alone and we can call and we can check in,
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but there also needs to be a layer of community as well.
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And I think that as we get older, those challenges just continue to increase.
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And it's so important that we prioritize connection.
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So as you were saying, essentially, beyond simply having people to talk to,
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like your children who may call and check in a few times a week,
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what does meaningful connection and engagement look like, especially as we get older?
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Absolutely. So, you know, meaningful connection is somebody that knows you.
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It's joining a class or an activity and somebody saying, you know,
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hey, Chrissy, we missed you yesterday. You know, where were you?
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It might be an inside joke that someone has or somebody remembering something
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really specific about you, whether that's, you know, you're a music lover or
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something that you might not like, you know, and it's being missed when you're not there.
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And I think the biggest thing, I think purpose is a huge part of what we inherently
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want to look forward to and find purpose in, right?
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So we never age out of wanting to contribute. We never age out of wanting to
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learn something, to be engaged, to connect, or to feel useful in general.
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And I think it's actually something that our Uniper members have really taught
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me. It's not just being in a room with other people.
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It's having something that you communally can do together.
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Common interest, a shared goal, you know, and that's really the whole idea behind
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Uniper. And the community isn't a feature that we added on top of it.
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It's the foundation of the entire platform that it sits on.
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So we saw early on that older adults don't want to just watch passive TV.
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They want to feel like they belong somewhere. So with Uniper,
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we really turned the TV watching experience from a passive one now to an interactive
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one. And it's that interaction. It's that connection.
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It's seeing other individuals through the TV and engaging with them that I think
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really is a differentiator and something that oftentimes older adults as we
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age, they're missing that community and that connection.
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Thank you so much for giving us that broader perspective about connection, Chrissy.
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Sandy, your story gives us an opportunity to understand what staying connected
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and engaged can actually look like when our lives change in a significant way.
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Before we talk more about Connection, Sandy, I'd love for our listeners to get to know you.
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Can you tell us a bit about yourself and your story?
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Well, the diagnosis came for my dementia while I was working at the Florida Department of Health.
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It was a difficult time, and my family, and I don't recall this,
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my daughters, they told me that I was really off during that time period.
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There is speculation that my daughter has that I was having maybe some mini
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strokes during that early time period.
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I don't recall it. I have no memory of it.
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They just said that I was totally off the track with my emotions and the way I behaved.
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When I was at the Florida Department of Health, I was the dentist that was responsible for reviewing,
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case files for complaints against dentists that may have violated the law,
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in one way or another where they may have extracted teeth that shouldn't have
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been extracted or they didn't have good dental records or what have you.
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And I would write up the reports.
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Well, after I would write up the report, I would close the file,
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and the file could be anywhere from 10 pages to 100 pages, 150 pages.
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I would close the file, and very often, within five minutes,
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an attorney would come into my office, and they would say, can I review the case with you?
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I didn't even remember what the case was about. I didn't even know the name
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of the dentist. I didn't even know what was going on in the case.
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I was nothing. I knew nothing. So I would always, I covered during that time
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and I said, okay, I'll come into your office and we'll discuss it.
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So what I did do before I got into the office is I opened up the file and I
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walked in with the file, you know, right where I saw it again.
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So it was fresh there so I could recall and then review it with that.
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And that lasted for a few months. And then I saw my primary care physician and
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the diagnosis. Sandy, thank you for sharing so openly about the beginning of your dementia journey.
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So I'd like to hear from you, a Uniper user, what you think really makes people
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successful. Well, I think, so I don't lose my train of thought, it's the consistency.
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Okay. It's the programming that's done that's consistent, that you know that
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every day, And there's a big coffee jet crew.
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It's the consistency that Uniper provides.
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And then within that consistency, there are members who are consistent within
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that particular programming, virtual programming, that they show up.
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And when they don't show up sometimes, the session leader knows that and other
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people know that and they'll say, well, where's Betty?
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We haven't seen her for two weeks. Is something wrong?
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So that can get reported to Uniper and Uniper. It becomes that people get to
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know when someone's not showing up, there's something going on,
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there's something wrong.
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I think we probably have some listeners wondering if we could learn a bit more
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about the basics of what Uniper is, what it has to offer, how people can find it.
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Could you get into some of that, Chrissy?
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So I'd love to share a high-level overview about Uniper, which really actually
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is all about bringing community care and connection into the homes of older adults.
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And the way that we do that is actually through the TV.
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So we want to make Uniper accessible. That's the biggest piece is making it
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accessible to older adults from the comfort and safety of home through a device
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that's already comfortable and familiar for older adults.
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So what we essentially do is through anyone's existing television,
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we turn the TV into a window to the world to allow that community and care to come in through Uniper.
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So essentially, it's a small device that clicks into the side of your TV.
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And then it comes with a camera. And that allows our members to see each other,
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to see our leaders, to see our instructors.
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And it also comes with a remote control. The remote control is also a microphone.
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So you'll oftentimes see our members folding up the remote and they're speaking
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into it. because it really does create that two-way communication directly through the television.
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Now, what members can enjoy on Uniper is a very wide and variety type of content.
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So we have live activities, and those are live with real instructors,
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real human instructors.
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So that allows our members to really be able to access our content without ever having to leave home.
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The content that we offer our members is across the dimensions of wellness.
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So we have a lot of physical activity classes. We have yoga,
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seated, standing, modified for those that might need it.
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We also have community-based groups. We have small group discussions. We have book clubs.
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We have brain and memory games to help keep our members' brains sharp and alert.
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And all of this is really bundled through the TV.
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And in addition to live programming,
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Members can also go at their own pace. So if they prefer to watch maybe a recorded
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video, that's also available.
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And on Uniper, members can also make video calls with their family,
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family members and friends.
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So directly through the TV, a member can call a loved one and their loved one
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can call them and that would show up on the TV.
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So it really does, again, bring that care, community and connection directly
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into the homes of those that are really looking for it, that are really in need
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and oftentimes struggling with loneliness and isolation.
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Can I add something right here that's important? I don't mean to contradict
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in any way what Chrissy just said.
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I'm on my laptop right now. I prefer to go on Uniper on my laptop and.
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It's fully able to go on to do whatever the TV would do I could do on my laptop.
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I can use my cell phone, my iPhone, and go on to Uniper.
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If I'm over at Starmaking Up, I haven't done this. Let's say we're at Starbucks
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and I wanted to be on Uniper. I could be on Uniper on my cell phone. I could be on an iPad.
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So Uniper has been phenomenal that you can have access not just by a television.
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You could be sitting at the park and as long as you have reception with Wi-Fi
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or whatever, you can go on to Uniper.
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We actually do have, It's a perfect segue, honestly, Sandy, because most of
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our members, Cheryl, prefer to engage through the TV.
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It's comfortable for them. They're in their living rooms. The TV's right there,
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right, big, nice and big in the middle of the living room.
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But we do have members who are a little bit more technologically savvy,
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and they're not fully homebound. So our members like Sandy can also enjoy Uniper on the go as well.
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So we have our flagship TV offering, which is really our broadest offering.
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And most of our members, just from a comfortability standpoint,
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choose to engage through the television.
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But absolutely they can take Uniper with them on the go, on their travels,
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while they're out visiting friends, family, grandkids, Uniper can come with.
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Chrissy, from your professional standpoint, and then I'll hear from your standpoint
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as a user, Sandy, through Uniper,
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what have you learned from older adults about what they really want and need
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when it comes to connection and community?
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I love this question. So I think the biggest thing that I've learned is that
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older adults, they are not one large, giant demographic.
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And I know that sounds obvious, but sometimes the way that we design programs
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for older adults, it might suggest otherwise.
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So the needs are different. The wants are different.
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The interests, you know, one person might really get excited about chair yoga
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that starts at nine in the morning.
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Then we have someone else that's really excited for trivia in the afternoon.
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We might have somebody that just wants to come and talk about,
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you know, baseball or they want to learn about technology and someone else just
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might want to, you know, sit down on Tuesdays with their coffee chat friends.
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So it's really changed the way it's really shaped the way I think that we think
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about Uniper. We're bringing this community directly into the homes through
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the television and we're not asking someone to change their behavior or become a technology expert.
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And I think that what makes Uniper so unique is it's so accessible.
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And just with a click of a button, all of this can be available directly in
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the home of that individual through their TV.
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And it really is based on their wants, their needs, what gets them excited.
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So I think from my standpoint, you know, it's really just the uniqueness of
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our older adult membership and the wide variety of what gets them excited.
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And I think oftentimes, too, we think about older adults as kind of just a category unto themselves.
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And within the older adult group that we're working with, I mean,
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everybody has some spark that just makes them so unique. So I think the diversity
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within our older adult population and what they're looking for really is something that is unique.
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And Sandy, as someone who uses Unipur, what have you learned from yourself as
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an older adult or from the other older adults that you participate with?
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What have you learned that they really enjoy about Unipur? Any of the specific programs or offerings?
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Well, I think that people are different and they have different interests,
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which I get to know because some people like gardening.
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Some people like art some people like history,
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but what's amazing and this is because of some of my medical issues i'm up during the night,
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and uniper is available 24 7 through some of its programming that may have been
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recorded through some of the sessions,
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or they may someone that went to greece or someone that went to brazil or and
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they would have it as programming that If you can't watch it during the day, I will watch it at night,
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because I'm up, so I'll watch it for an hour.
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So it's been an outlet, I think, I forgot your exact question,
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but it's an outlet for seniors to...
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Gets the information in such a wide variety of topics that Uniper offers.
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What's speaking to me is that I've read a couple studies that,
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especially for young adults, technology can make them feel more lonely.
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And I'm making an assumption here that
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that comes from really them viewing influencers or videos or that one way,
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of how social media can sometimes be compared to the technology of Uniper that
00:17:33.054 --> 00:17:38.938
we're talking about, which is oftentimes, at least during the regular business hours, is,
00:17:39.391 --> 00:17:45.244
a two-way connection with a facilitator or an instructor and other individuals
00:17:45.244 --> 00:17:46.964
who are using the services.
00:17:46.964 --> 00:17:52.824
So that really sets the technology apart that it's two-way.
00:17:53.126 --> 00:17:56.914
Is there anything that you want to add to that?
00:17:57.374 --> 00:18:00.973
Well, I think even my speaking to you right now,
00:18:01.624 --> 00:18:06.494
if I were to have conversations with you every week, I would get to know you
00:18:06.494 --> 00:18:11.414
better and your family and your life or what things you enjoy doing,
00:18:11.414 --> 00:18:13.574
whether you like to play pickleball or when.
00:18:14.694 --> 00:18:17.431
You enjoy cooking, what's your favorite foods.
00:18:18.214 --> 00:18:21.884
You get to know someone not just from the first meeting.
00:18:22.307 --> 00:18:26.784
So this Zoom meeting that we're having now where you're talking to Chrissy and
00:18:26.784 --> 00:18:35.061
myself is the beginning of what Uniper would begin as if it were a first session, so to speak.
00:18:35.723 --> 00:18:44.076
And this, it's a valuable introduction, but with Uniper, it continues each week,
00:18:44.761 --> 00:18:46.776
maybe multiple times during the week,
00:18:47.530 --> 00:18:54.031
and then sometimes off of the Uniper platform, so it becomes the relationships that are formed.
00:18:54.817 --> 00:19:00.323
That are so valuable, particularly for someone that's living without someone
00:19:00.323 --> 00:19:02.828
in their house, you know, their family.
00:19:03.373 --> 00:19:07.663
And you learn that they have their family, their children and their grandchildren,
00:19:07.663 --> 00:19:09.867
and you get to know their lives.
00:19:10.518 --> 00:19:12.683
The only thing I would probably add to that, Cheryl, too, is,
00:19:12.683 --> 00:19:17.026
you know, we talk a lot about technology and Uniper is a technology-based company,
00:19:17.316 --> 00:19:20.474
but we're never going to remove the need for the human connection.
00:19:20.700 --> 00:19:24.427
And actually, as an organization, we double down on that human connection.
00:19:24.694 --> 00:19:28.845
You know, technology is never necessarily standing alone going to make someone feel connected.
00:19:29.205 --> 00:19:33.453
But what makes this virtual experience that our members have on Uniper feel
00:19:33.453 --> 00:19:37.111
so genuine and authentic is the human connection part.
00:19:37.459 --> 00:19:40.633
You know, I can give somebody the fanciest technology in the world,
00:19:40.633 --> 00:19:45.363
but if nobody notices whether they show up, whether no one notices if they are
00:19:45.363 --> 00:19:48.843
there, whether no one noticed if they've reached an accomplishment.
00:19:48.843 --> 00:19:51.553
I mean, that doesn't feel to me like a connection.
00:19:51.831 --> 00:19:55.953
And I think connection happens when someone says your name, when someone remembers
00:19:55.953 --> 00:20:00.133
something that you told them, when an instructor recognizes someone's face that
00:20:00.133 --> 00:20:03.823
they haven't seen in a few weeks and by name says, you know,
00:20:03.823 --> 00:20:06.146
Martha, how are you? We've missed you.
00:20:06.384 --> 00:20:09.593
When another member welcomes and says, hey, Sandy, how are you,
00:20:09.593 --> 00:20:12.773
buddy? It's been a while. I haven't seen you in a few days. How are things going
00:20:12.773 --> 00:20:15.191
on the health front, that is magic.
00:20:15.614 --> 00:20:20.746
That right there makes someone feel seen, makes them feel heard, makes them feel valued.
00:20:21.135 --> 00:20:25.273
So technology can remove barriers. It can bring the community into someone's
00:20:25.273 --> 00:20:30.255
living room when transportation isn't there, when mobility might prevent them from participating.
00:20:30.597 --> 00:20:35.491
But technology can't manufacture a relationship. People have to do that.
00:20:35.746 --> 00:20:38.313
And I think that that's something that Uniper is so unique in.
00:20:38.313 --> 00:20:42.013
We're bringing community and real human connection into the home.
00:20:42.013 --> 00:20:46.352
This isn't manufactured. This is authentic. And this is what keeps that engagement.
00:20:47.026 --> 00:20:50.877
Going. You know, people keep coming back to Uniper and spending more and more
00:20:50.877 --> 00:20:55.607
time on Uniper because they find a place, a safe place where they can all come
00:20:55.607 --> 00:21:00.545
together and join other individuals who are going through a lot of the same life challenges.
00:21:00.800 --> 00:21:04.672
You know, oftentimes we hear members sharing something so deeply personal,
00:21:04.986 --> 00:21:10.449
you know, the loss of a child, the loss of a spouse, and this community is there to catch them.
00:21:10.734 --> 00:21:15.257
They're there to listen. They're there to support. But more so it's really just
00:21:15.257 --> 00:21:17.526
making sure that everyone feels seen.
00:21:17.804 --> 00:21:22.157
And during times of loneliness and isolation, that community is a bedrock.
00:21:22.157 --> 00:21:27.197
It is a bedrock for that individual to feel like they have a place to go and they're not alone.
00:21:27.499 --> 00:21:31.295
And family members are so wonderful within the broader ecosystem.
00:21:31.516 --> 00:21:35.677
But again, they're only there for certain amounts of time. And there's this
00:21:35.677 --> 00:21:40.237
whole other space in someone's day that oftentimes can be filled in silence
00:21:40.237 --> 00:21:42.092
and it never should be. It doesn't have to be.
00:21:42.731 --> 00:21:45.616
And that really is, I think, at the crux of what we're trying to do at Unipro.
00:21:46.446 --> 00:21:54.735
It sounds like it's also a way to re-engage people's passions and purpose.
00:21:55.089 --> 00:22:00.690
And that encouragement comes from the different types of classes and offerings.
00:22:00.690 --> 00:22:05.570
It comes from the instructors and it comes from also the individuals like Sandy
00:22:05.570 --> 00:22:11.906
who are joining and using. It sounds like a very positive atmosphere that you're providing.
00:22:12.596 --> 00:22:13.990
It is. And I think it's one that
00:22:13.990 --> 00:22:18.070
is very supportive and it's very person-centered. It's person-centric.
00:22:18.360 --> 00:22:22.860
So, you know, what we're really every single day looking to do is to kind of
00:22:22.860 --> 00:22:24.619
create this fellowship.
00:22:24.921 --> 00:22:29.610
And I think that people have forged such great friendships and those coming
00:22:29.610 --> 00:22:32.820
together. It's almost like, you know, you have a group of your biggest cheerleaders
00:22:32.820 --> 00:22:35.970
on Uniper because everyone is kind of getting to know each other and they're
00:22:35.970 --> 00:22:38.388
understanding little pieces of everyone's life.
00:22:38.760 --> 00:22:43.501
And what we're really looking to do is also foster that. We want people to get excited again.
00:22:43.774 --> 00:22:47.510
We want people to get rejuvenated with things that maybe they've put on the
00:22:47.510 --> 00:22:49.388
shelf for a really long time.
00:22:49.701 --> 00:22:52.950
And now they have the opportunity to get back into those passions,
00:22:52.950 --> 00:22:54.391
back into those hobbies.
00:22:54.693 --> 00:22:58.330
And Uniper is such a beautiful place to be able to showcase those,
00:22:58.330 --> 00:23:01.460
have people come together and support each other. It really,
00:23:01.460 --> 00:23:03.611
really is just such a supportive community.
00:23:05.660 --> 00:23:11.030
Would you prefer to age independently in your own home or live in a nursing facility?
00:23:11.558 --> 00:23:16.359
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00:23:16.870 --> 00:23:21.798
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00:23:41.344 --> 00:23:44.896
Welcome back to Honestly Aging by Friends Life Care Vigor. Today,
00:23:44.896 --> 00:23:50.246
I'm joined by Chrissy Knappe from Uniper and Sandy Halperin for a conversation
00:23:50.246 --> 00:23:55.699
about social connection, staying engaged, and finding purpose and community as we age.
00:23:57.743 --> 00:24:02.937
It can be difficult to be the new person in any group.
00:24:03.407 --> 00:24:13.171
How do you go about helping new people to the organization feel welcomed?
00:24:13.987 --> 00:24:17.156
So everyone we really promote, everyone goes at their own pace.
00:24:17.156 --> 00:24:18.736
We are so member-centric.
00:24:19.044 --> 00:24:22.486
So we might have somebody that joins Uniper and they're really excited for live
00:24:22.486 --> 00:24:24.407
activities and live classes.
00:24:24.605 --> 00:24:27.786
One thing I wanted to mention that is kind of the way that we get to know our
00:24:27.786 --> 00:24:32.116
members and start really promoting content and activities that will meet their
00:24:32.116 --> 00:24:35.360
needs and their goals is, again, the human connection.
00:24:35.570 --> 00:24:40.376
So once someone joins UNIPR, they are actually assigned a UNIPR PAL.
00:24:40.376 --> 00:24:43.256
That stands for Partner for Aging and Longevity.
00:24:43.644 --> 00:24:48.692
The Uniper Pal you can kind of think of is that one central person on the Uniper
00:24:48.692 --> 00:24:52.340
team that's going to check in with you every week over a video call.
00:24:52.566 --> 00:24:57.302
So every member has a Uniper Pal, and that job of the Uniper Pal is to get the
00:24:57.302 --> 00:25:00.819
member comfortable on Uniper, navigating Uniper.
00:25:01.098 --> 00:25:05.039
But right after that, we want to get to know you, and we want to go at your pace.
00:25:05.266 --> 00:25:09.232
So again, someone might love live activities and be ready to join and be ready
00:25:09.232 --> 00:25:12.951
to be on camera, but we also have members that are a little bit more on the shy side.
00:25:13.243 --> 00:25:17.742
They want to go at a slower pace. So what we really try to do is ease our members
00:25:17.742 --> 00:25:21.102
into that kind of live experience before they're just thrown in,
00:25:21.102 --> 00:25:23.210
unless they want to join live, and that's fine.
00:25:23.517 --> 00:25:27.462
But the PAL meets with the member every single week, and they're wondering,
00:25:27.462 --> 00:25:30.782
what did you love last week that you joined on Uniper? Tell me a little bit
00:25:30.782 --> 00:25:32.474
about some of your favorite activities.
00:25:32.741 --> 00:25:36.822
Then they're talking about, you know, what that member can do the following week.
00:25:36.822 --> 00:25:42.072
So they'll review our schedule of activities and find ones that get that member
00:25:42.072 --> 00:25:46.792
excited. And we'll start to baby step into maybe joining live activities as
00:25:46.792 --> 00:25:50.458
they start to kind of gain a little bit more confidence on the platform.
00:25:50.772 --> 00:25:55.472
So it is very much at the member's pace. And once we do see members join live
00:25:55.472 --> 00:25:59.558
activities, though, that really is kind of the magic because we see them on camera.
00:25:59.831 --> 00:26:02.692
We see members that previously might have not been on camera,
00:26:02.692 --> 00:26:06.855
not fully ready, start joining activities and start engaging.
00:26:07.116 --> 00:26:11.023
So the PAL is really there to go at the members' pace, to check in with them,
00:26:11.244 --> 00:26:13.566
to kind of get them ready for those live activities.
00:26:13.746 --> 00:26:17.076
But again, when members are joining, our leaders are welcoming them by name.
00:26:17.262 --> 00:26:20.642
So even if they haven't met that individual yet, say you're joining for the
00:26:20.642 --> 00:26:24.172
first time, Cheryl, and I'm your instructor, you're going to get a big welcome
00:26:24.172 --> 00:26:27.293
from Chrissy. It's going to say, Cheryl, we're so happy you're here.
00:26:27.554 --> 00:26:30.562
Great that you're joining us. We hope we're going to see you later on this week,
00:26:30.562 --> 00:26:32.715
too. And it's a welcoming experience.
00:26:33.356 --> 00:26:38.972
Environment, you know, for our members. And they feel welcomed with a big warm hug.
00:26:38.972 --> 00:26:42.902
And our leaders and our instructors are so in tune with that.
00:26:42.902 --> 00:26:46.973
And more so to the pals, really being able to help our members feel comfortable
00:26:47.206 --> 00:26:51.722
and maximize getting the benefits that they're looking for out of Uniper at
00:26:51.722 --> 00:26:52.887
the most, the highest level.
00:26:53.539 --> 00:27:00.142
And it's interesting for me, as I communicate through some individuals on,
00:27:00.142 --> 00:27:03.518
let's say, LinkedIn or Facebook or by person,
00:27:04.110 --> 00:27:10.988
for them to understand the value without experiencing itself sometimes.
00:27:11.272 --> 00:27:19.294
To understand, like, we're trying to explain to you what the inherent value of Uniper is,
00:27:19.881 --> 00:27:29.177
but to experience it and to be on it is something that is sometimes difficult,
00:27:29.682 --> 00:27:32.562
for some individuals to garner.
00:27:32.902 --> 00:27:38.122
It could be a home care agency that may want to sponsor groups of people,
00:27:38.644 --> 00:27:46.398
let's say 12 to 15 people that they treat by making that home care agency.
00:27:46.746 --> 00:27:52.792
So for them to understand the value for these individuals when the caregiver
00:27:52.792 --> 00:27:57.733
can't be there, when a family member can't be there, and they were home alone,
00:27:58.395 --> 00:28:02.516
that's where the gap can be filled in with Uniper.
00:28:03.079 --> 00:28:07.706
I mean, their son or daughter's not there. They don't have a spouse.
00:28:09.002 --> 00:28:13.942
They don't have a family member. They're home alone. And there's Uniper.
00:28:13.942 --> 00:28:19.962
So to explain that to somebody and the value of having that fill that gap of
00:28:19.962 --> 00:28:25.621
that time of day with sessions or prerecorded sessions is valuable.
00:28:26.846 --> 00:28:32.891
And so, Chrissy, do you typically partner with organizations to provide Uniper
00:28:32.891 --> 00:28:36.616
or is it something that individuals can join? How does that work?
00:28:37.197 --> 00:28:40.891
Thanks for asking. So it's actually both. We primarily work with health plans,
00:28:40.891 --> 00:28:46.344
aging organizations, community-based organizations, home care groups, senior living.
00:28:46.663 --> 00:28:51.911
And those groups make Uniper available to the members and people that they serve at no cost.
00:28:52.161 --> 00:28:56.421
So if someone was listening and thinking, wow, I really want Sandy's social
00:28:56.421 --> 00:28:58.714
life, first of all, I don't blame you. I do too.
00:28:58.964 --> 00:29:02.900
But I would also encourage you to visit online at UniperCare.com.
00:29:03.138 --> 00:29:07.511
We can let you know if there's Uniper coverage in your area or anyone else that
00:29:07.511 --> 00:29:13.961
would like to join can give us a call at 888-471-7623 and reach out to our team.
00:29:14.199 --> 00:29:17.421
We also have a direct-to-consumer model that Uniper is building,
00:29:17.421 --> 00:29:22.564
so individuals will be able to have access outside of our partnering agencies as well.
00:29:22.866 --> 00:29:26.071
So give our call a team or reach out to us online, and we'd be more than happy
00:29:26.071 --> 00:29:27.946
to see if there's coverage in your area.
00:29:28.655 --> 00:29:35.121
Yeah. Sandy, something that I want to ask if we could touch on about you a little
00:29:35.121 --> 00:29:39.916
bit that I got away from earlier when we were talking is that
00:29:40.265 --> 00:29:44.402
you're very open about your journey with dementia.
00:29:44.716 --> 00:29:51.194
And you've spent many years advocating for people who are living with dementia.
00:29:51.903 --> 00:29:56.721
What made you decide to speak openly about your experience?
00:29:57.457 --> 00:30:01.971
When I would speak to large audiences, sometimes there were 600 people,
00:30:01.971 --> 00:30:09.183
1,000 people, 1,200 people, and I was fortunate through my advocacy, I never, ever.
00:30:11.091 --> 00:30:15.689
In any circumstance, accepted any monetary money, not a nickel.
00:30:16.583 --> 00:30:23.230
I did it from my heart. I wanted to be there for people who were dealing with
00:30:23.230 --> 00:30:27.493
memory deficit and how to live better lives.
00:30:28.134 --> 00:30:34.040
And when I would speak to these large groups that were healthcare providers
00:30:34.040 --> 00:30:41.263
and people that worked in memory centers or healthcare providers of some sort.
00:30:42.620 --> 00:30:46.372
I would I was so committed,
00:30:46.991 --> 00:30:51.722
to having them work together out of their silos because it was so common,
00:30:52.314 --> 00:30:57.940
for them to have their own mission and do their own thing so I spoke a lot about
00:30:57.940 --> 00:31:02.438
get out of your silo work with other people and people that are living with,
00:31:02.885 --> 00:31:06.076
dementia I made it the term dementia,
00:31:07.060 --> 00:31:11.870
when i first went to the alzheimer's association and they had me on the early
00:31:11.870 --> 00:31:17.780
stage advisory group for alzheimer's i was videotaped and they said and i used
00:31:17.780 --> 00:31:20.220
the word dementia that i had dementia,
00:31:20.875 --> 00:31:23.093
they said no we want you to say alzheimer's,
00:31:23.768 --> 00:31:26.010
i said no i have dementia,
00:31:26.716 --> 00:31:31.280
and there's because there's so many kinds of dementia so i would speak about
00:31:31.280 --> 00:31:37.181
that and i felt that that was of value when I was in front of groups of people
00:31:37.565 --> 00:31:38.890
to speak about dementia.
00:31:38.890 --> 00:31:42.670
And that would even be true of those that are on Uniper.
00:31:42.670 --> 00:31:46.812
They have, if they have memory deficit, I can't say, well, by the way,
00:31:47.085 --> 00:31:52.840
you've got Alzheimer's because of whatever, what tests did they have?
00:31:53.180 --> 00:31:54.318
How were they diagnosed?
00:31:54.747 --> 00:32:03.284
There's many, many sorts of dementia. So I was committed to advocate to...
00:32:04.158 --> 00:32:11.920
Have people living with dementia to live in the present like I am with you right now.
00:32:12.547 --> 00:32:15.972
And there was a book written, and I have in the living room, I've given this book.
00:32:16.256 --> 00:32:21.823
I've probably bought this book for probably 20, 30 people, 40 people, I don't know how many.
00:32:22.218 --> 00:32:25.829
It's called The Precious Present by Spencer Johnson.
00:32:26.479 --> 00:32:31.325
And it's about, you know, there's all these cliches about living in the present.
00:32:31.325 --> 00:32:35.609
Don't live in the past, don't worry about the future because that's not there yet.
00:32:36.213 --> 00:32:42.875
So I would talk about to the people living with dementia when I would be speaking
00:32:42.875 --> 00:32:46.557
to them in caregiving groups, live in the present. Here we are.
00:32:46.992 --> 00:32:51.375
We have a group of 20 people here. Let's talk about what's going on right now.
00:32:51.631 --> 00:32:55.525
What happened yesterday is not relevant necessarily or what in the future.
00:32:55.525 --> 00:32:58.498
Let's talk about right now, which I'm doing right now with you.
00:32:59.067 --> 00:33:03.392
You're interviewing me and Chrissy, and I'm just being in the present.
00:33:04.442 --> 00:33:09.943
Answering your question that you just asked. So it was a pleasure for me to
00:33:09.943 --> 00:33:17.913
go out and advocate and to have people that were in the world of caring for
00:33:17.913 --> 00:33:19.270
those living with dementia.
00:33:19.566 --> 00:33:24.213
And yes, and Uniper does circle around to that with their, they've got a brain
00:33:24.213 --> 00:33:29.584
gym, they've got cognitive training, they've got sessions on cognition.
00:33:29.979 --> 00:33:34.037
So they're advocating even with themselves.
00:33:34.327 --> 00:33:39.888
On Uniper and helping people that may have memory issues like myself.
00:33:40.492 --> 00:33:46.743
And what do you wish more people understood about what it's actually like living with dementia?
00:33:47.083 --> 00:33:50.541
Thank you. This is something that really is important.
00:33:51.475 --> 00:33:57.545
There's someone that, there's an organization called InvisibleDisabilities.org.
00:33:58.451 --> 00:34:05.073
And what's really painful for people living with memory loss and it is really
00:34:05.073 --> 00:34:07.733
difficult and i've spoken to many,
00:34:08.519 --> 00:34:14.005
obviously being in the early stage advisory group and all of the advocacy for the years,
00:34:14.829 --> 00:34:17.836
they look at someone with dementia like you're looking at me right now,
00:34:18.499 --> 00:34:22.293
but you can say but you look good and there was a book by that title and it's
00:34:22.293 --> 00:34:26.533
right over there it's right on the wall but you look good someone can have a
00:34:26.533 --> 00:34:31.762
medical problem you don't know that my chest right now feels raw and irritated,
00:34:32.445 --> 00:34:34.569
my my throat is raw.
00:34:35.569 --> 00:34:41.850
I've got sores on my arm from my chemotherapy that are irritated.
00:34:42.373 --> 00:34:48.233
There's things that, you know, I've got cardiac calcifications that are severe,
00:34:48.802 --> 00:34:51.751
and they're of concern, moderate to severe.
00:34:52.401 --> 00:34:56.075
But you could look at me, you're looking at me right now, but you look good.
00:34:56.922 --> 00:35:01.137
And that was someone with a memory problem. And they're on Uniper.
00:35:01.444 --> 00:35:04.091
And someone looks at them and they've got a memory problem.
00:35:04.796 --> 00:35:10.863
And someone says to them, but you look good, it's sort of dismissing their medical issue.
00:35:11.780 --> 00:35:15.435
Right now, you could have a very bad headache, but you look good.
00:35:16.509 --> 00:35:24.048
And that's where I don't pigeonhole someone,
00:35:25.382 --> 00:35:33.012
with a memory disorder like dementia of some sort and go invalidate them with
00:35:33.012 --> 00:35:35.563
whatever medical issue they may have, but you'll look good.
00:35:37.582 --> 00:35:45.552
And take it as a dismissal. So I guess my advocacy really circled around to
00:35:45.552 --> 00:35:47.354
a lot of different things.
00:35:48.231 --> 00:35:55.581
And even though, Sandy, you are going through so much right now,
00:35:56.370 --> 00:36:04.031
You remain as active, engaged, and connected as you can.
00:36:06.022 --> 00:36:12.818
What keeps you going and continuing to put yourself out there?
00:36:13.433 --> 00:36:17.575
The good question, and my wife has posed that to me,
00:36:18.754 --> 00:36:27.713
I've developed these skills through my life from childhood, having bad asthma and breathing and.
00:36:28.978 --> 00:36:36.513
Having other issues to the time when I was diagnosed with the dementia with
00:36:36.513 --> 00:36:42.369
all these other things going on right now that are like I find it hard to remember myself,
00:36:42.976 --> 00:36:44.453
all these things that I'm dealing with.
00:36:44.453 --> 00:36:50.418
I don't have to go put on a piece of paper or go that I've learned coping skills,
00:36:51.376 --> 00:36:55.184
which I'm using right now with you to answer these questions.
00:36:56.333 --> 00:37:01.467
And I've got to, I've accepted that there's these other aids that I need.
00:37:02.653 --> 00:37:05.560
I can take a pill, literally take a pill.
00:37:06.117 --> 00:37:12.235
And if I don't mark it down, I have no idea if I took that pill. I have no idea. None.
00:37:12.826 --> 00:37:14.359
I mean, it happens a lot.
00:37:14.980 --> 00:37:19.603
So I've got to be very careful. And I have a page each day where I check off
00:37:19.603 --> 00:37:21.974
and I take each of the medications that I need.
00:37:22.548 --> 00:37:26.120
Because if I don't, I have no idea whether I took it or I didn't take it.
00:37:27.273 --> 00:37:33.673
So I've learned these coping mechanisms to allow me to take the pill to know
00:37:33.673 --> 00:37:38.078
that I took it. It's not, you know, it's been taken. I checked it off.
00:37:38.880 --> 00:37:47.083
You are a true example of resilience, and it goes to show that.
00:37:48.287 --> 00:38:00.123
Despite going through so much, there are avenues to remain connected and in community with others.
00:38:00.788 --> 00:38:06.988
So in closing, I'm going to start with you, Sandy, and then I'll close with you, Chrissy.
00:38:07.328 --> 00:38:12.598
Sandy, what would you say to someone who feels like their world has gotten smaller
00:38:12.598 --> 00:38:18.458
as they've gotten older or gone through health crisis, and they're just not
00:38:18.458 --> 00:38:20.597
sure how to start reconnecting.
00:38:21.387 --> 00:38:27.028
Well, you know, it can often be difficult for some people that I know to,
00:38:27.428 --> 00:38:33.494
on an individual one-on-one basis, to go, if I were to leave my apartment and go down the hallway,
00:38:34.028 --> 00:38:36.388
and someone would say to me, hey, Cindy, how are you feeling?
00:38:36.388 --> 00:38:40.878
And it's all I say to them, and my grandchildren laugh, I say I'm managing,
00:38:40.878 --> 00:38:43.641
that's all I say. I don't go through a litany of things.
00:38:44.378 --> 00:38:49.074
So I think that there's, without any doubt,
00:38:49.813 --> 00:38:55.868
Uniper has filled a gap in my life where it's been sort of this gem that has
00:38:55.868 --> 00:39:00.470
filled gaps of time for me that have been so valuable.
00:39:01.050 --> 00:39:06.828
Not just for what the session will do, because I may not remember much from
00:39:06.828 --> 00:39:12.608
the session, but from the social interactions that I will have during those sessions.
00:39:12.823 --> 00:39:17.623
And that has been valuable, including the relationships that I have formed with,
00:39:18.164 --> 00:39:20.608
a number of people that have been valuable to me.
00:39:21.363 --> 00:39:26.181
And it's amazing that it's been done virtually without me physically seeing them.
00:39:27.295 --> 00:39:32.795
And Chrissy, do you have any words of encouragement for individuals who are
00:39:32.795 --> 00:39:39.579
experiencing that loneliness, isolation, and they're hesitant to put themselves out there to reconnect?
00:39:40.194 --> 00:39:43.345
Absolutely. I think the first thing that I would tell them is you are not alone.
00:39:43.345 --> 00:39:47.675
There are so many other older adults who are experiencing feelings of loneliness
00:39:47.675 --> 00:39:49.720
and isolation. It is so common.
00:39:49.993 --> 00:39:53.301
And it's not something I think that we talk about enough to normalize it.
00:39:54.155 --> 00:39:56.845
You're not alone. And I that I would tell them that they don't have to make
00:39:56.845 --> 00:39:59.936
their entire world bigger overnight. Let's start small.
00:40:00.203 --> 00:40:04.115
Let's just make it manageable and start really small. Find one thing that you
00:40:04.115 --> 00:40:07.505
really enjoy. And it doesn't have to be something that someone told you that
00:40:07.505 --> 00:40:10.873
you should be doing as an older adult, right? Drinking more water or stretching.
00:40:11.146 --> 00:40:14.075
Find something that you're actually passionate about. Music,
00:40:14.075 --> 00:40:17.409
sports, cooking, exercise, books, whatever that is.
00:40:17.723 --> 00:40:21.734
Find one thing and find a way to experience it with another person.
00:40:22.013 --> 00:40:26.390
The beautiful thing is we have technology and we can do these types of things virtually now.
00:40:27.115 --> 00:40:30.505
So I would tell someone who maybe feels like their world is getting a little
00:40:30.505 --> 00:40:35.745
bit smaller, stay curious, stay connected. You're allowed to meet new people.
00:40:35.745 --> 00:40:38.139
You're allowed to do things that you've never done before.
00:40:38.406 --> 00:40:41.651
There are still people that you haven't met yet that are out there that are
00:40:41.999 --> 00:40:45.995
possibly going to become important people in your lives. So take the step,
00:40:45.995 --> 00:40:48.455
put yourself out there just a little, little bit.
00:40:48.875 --> 00:40:50.455
And there's technology. Uniper
00:40:50.455 --> 00:40:54.588
is one of many other great solutions that can offer that connection.
00:40:54.890 --> 00:40:58.655
And I honestly, I promise you there is a window to the world out there waiting
00:40:58.655 --> 00:41:02.099
for you to help you feel connected. You just need to find it.
00:41:02.786 --> 00:41:10.182
Well, I want to thank you both so much for sharing so openly and honestly,
00:41:10.662 --> 00:41:17.332
about your professional and personal experiences and encouraging others who
00:41:17.332 --> 00:41:23.812
may be experiencing loneliness, isolation, medical complications to
00:41:24.126 --> 00:41:30.133
start building some connections and adding some more purpose and,
00:41:30.609 --> 00:41:32.492
you know, joy into their lives.
00:41:32.492 --> 00:41:36.512
And I appreciate the time you both took out to join me today.
00:41:36.512 --> 00:41:39.096
Thank you. Well, thank you. It's been wonderful.
00:41:39.283 --> 00:41:41.942
Thank you so much. This has been phenomenal. Thanks, Cheryl.
00:41:41.942 --> 00:41:43.686
We really appreciated you having us.
00:41:45.306 --> 00:41:49.022
Thank you for listening to Honestly Aging by Friends Life Care Vigor,
00:41:49.362 --> 00:41:54.052
a unique program focused on aging with vitality, independence,
00:41:54.052 --> 00:41:55.656
growth, and resilience.
00:41:55.975 --> 00:41:57.792
You can find links and show notes
00:41:57.792 --> 00:42:03.348
from this episode on our website at friendslifecare.org slash podcast.
00:42:03.801 --> 00:42:08.332
If you'd like to learn more about Uniper, Chrissy, Sandy, and their work,
00:42:08.332 --> 00:42:10.424
we'll include links in the show notes.
00:42:11.103 --> 00:42:16.292
If you enjoyed today's conversation, be sure to subscribe, share this episode
00:42:16.292 --> 00:42:20.872
with someone who may need it and join us next time as we continue exploring
00:42:20.872 --> 00:42:23.659
what it means to age honestly and age well.