INFORMAZIONI SU QUESTO EPISODIO
We warmly welcome Lauren Stutman, Psy.D to Diverse Thinking Different Learning for this episode. Dr. Lauren Stutman is a licensed clinical psychologist and the founder and clinical director of CARE-LA (Child Anxiety Reduction Experts), a multidisciplinary practice that specializes in anxiety, OCD, and other related challenges in children and adolescents. Drawing on more than two decades of clinical experience (as well as her own childhood experience with anxiety and OCD), Dr. Stutman is passionate about translating evidence-based psychological concepts into practical tools that children and families can understand and use. She is also the author of Rosie and Her Garden of PESTs, an imaginative children's book that helps children recognize and respond differently to their Pesky, Empty, Scary Thoughts.
Throughout our conversation, we discuss what anxiety, OCD, and perfectionism look like from a child's perspective and how adults can recognize the struggles that often remain hidden beneath the surface. Dr. Stutman reflects on her own experiences as a child and teen and what it was like to appear socially confident while privately struggling with persistent dread, intrusive thoughts, and compulsive behaviors. She explains how anxiety, OCD, and perfectionism can become intertwined, why adults may overlook the distress behind children who seem to be succeeding on the surface, and what distinguishes healthy ambition from perfectionism that interferes with daily life.
Our conversation also looks at broader pressures facing children and families, from academic competition and college admissions to social media and the expectation to excel in every area. Dr. Stutman challenges the tendency to place responsibility solely on parents, arguing that expectations often leave families overwhelmed and children with little room to make mistakes. We get into some practical ways that adults can use to help children recognize negative self-talk, question their assumptions, and develop a healthier relationship with uncertainty and imperfection, and we explore the importance of modeling emotional regulation, acknowledging mistakes, and reminding children that their worth extends beyond grades, achievements, and the labels that others assign them.
Finally, Dr. Stutman shares the inspiration behind Rosie and Her Garden of PESTs, which gives young readers a playful, accessible way to identify and challenge their distressing thoughts. This episode of the podcast offers parents, educators, and caregivers valuable insights into helping children feel understood, supported, and free to experience life without the burden of being perfect, and we hope that you enjoy our conversation with Dr. Lauren Stutman!
Show Notes: [2:41] - Dr. Stutman reflects on masking her struggles, feeling constant dread, and compensating for difficulties without understanding the "rules." [5:25] - Perfectionism and performative behaviors concealed Lauren's struggles, making them difficult for adults to recognize. [7:11] - Hear how Lauren's painful experiences with anxiety and OCD now help her connect with and support struggling children. [9:43] - Challenging her OCD's compulsions helped redirect Dr. Stutman's energy toward meaningful work, including writing and building her company. [12:28] - Feeling understood can be therapeutic, while societal pressures prioritize academic achievement over mental health. [15:15] - Lauren argues that addressing systemic pressures and embracing imperfect parenting can reduce parental guilt and model healthy emotional regulation. [18:42] - Hear how perfectionism involves rigidity, emotional dysregulation, and harmful self-talk, unlike healthy striving which allows flexibility and resilience. [20:52] - Dr. Stutman highlights mindful thinking, challenging negative thoughts, and prioritizing children's wellbeing over academic pressures. [23:54] - Praising effort over achievement and encouraging personal pride can help children escape limiting labels. [25:31] - In addition, modeling mistakes, repairing relationships, and embracing imperfection can help teach kids resilience and encourage them to face discomfort. [28:03] - Dr. Stutman argues that it's important for parents to push themselves in front of their kids. [29:30] - What inspired Dr. Lauren Stutman's children's book? [31:04] - Lauren's book helps children challenge negative thought spirals by externalizing intrusive thoughts and reframing their harmful assumptions. [33:18] - Self-compassion can build emotional resources, while recognizing negative thought patterns creates opportunities for meaningful change. [35:07] - Teaching children to recognize cognitive distortions and embrace uncertainty helps them reshape their thinking! [37:35] - How can Dr. Stutman be reached?
Links and Related Resources:
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Episode 153: Understanding Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD) with Dr. Jesse Spiegel
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Episode 181: Youth Anxiety: How Parents Can Help with Dr. Elizabeth Karp
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Episode 216: Teen Anxiety: Signs, Causes, and Effective Treatment Options with Dr. Ashley Smith
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Connect with Dr. Stutman:
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Phone Number: (917) 971- 4825
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Street Address: 10323 Santa Monica Blvd, Suite 102 &103 / Los Angeles, CA
