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And so I was on Necker Island, one of the islands he owns.
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I was there with a group of business people.
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And the playing tennis, I ruptured my Achilles tendon.
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So I'm just sitting there watching people play.
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And Richard, who just happened to be on the island, is not always there.
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He doesn't live on the island, but sometimes he bounces in to meet people.
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He hears what happened to me and he comes up to me and he says, Oh, this is such a bother that this has happened to you.
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Do you play chess?
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Now the correct answer is, I haven't played chess in 40 years.
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So I'm thinking, oh, he's gonna beat me in five moves.
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He's gonna think I'm an idiot.
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He's gonna wonder why the heck I said I could play chess.
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It's gonna be embarrassing.
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But I said, Yeah, I play chess.
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Welcome to purpose-driven success with Mo Salami, where real journeys, mindset shifts, and strategic insights meet purpose-driven success.
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I'm your host, Mo Salami.
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Every week we dive into real conversations with high-achieving founders and leaders, uncovering the mindset, strategies, and takeaways that help you define and achieve success on your own terms.
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Welcome to another episode of Purpose Driven Success.
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Today we have the creme de la creme of guests.
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I call him the guest de la guest.
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Today's guest is Fred Joyle, entrepreneur, speaker, and best-selling author of Super Bold.
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Fred co-founded Future Don Six, the company behind 1-800 Dentists, which generated over a billion dollars in revenue across three decades.
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But what makes Fred's story so compelling isn't just the business success, it's the transformation behind it.
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He went from being deeply unconfident and uncomfortable being seen to becoming someone who teaches boldness, communication, and personal reinvention around the world.
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In this conversation, we'll explore mindset shifts, habits, and uncomfortable decisions that helped Fred redefine success on his own terms.
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Also, somehow, he once beat Sir Richard Branson at chess, which we definitely have to talk about.
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Fred Joy, welcome to purpose-driven success.
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Welcome, welcome, welcome, Fred.
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Mo, thank you so much for being here.
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I look forward to this conversation.
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We developed this really tight friendship very quickly, and I want to bring as much value as I can to your followers, your audience.
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Awesome.
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Let's get into it.
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Fred, you have some amazing frameworks and ideas.
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You're such a visionary.
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Before we get there, I want to start with your own story in your way.
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When you look back at your journey from where you started to becoming a boldness coach, of course, you're much more than that.
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What are the defining chapters that shaped who you are today?
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There was a turning point in my life.
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I was an introvert.
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I was very shy.
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And it kept me from experiencing the life that I wanted.
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And it would frustrate me.
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And I would see bold people, and I wouldn't understand why they were like that.
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Why they didn't stop themselves like I did.
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Why didn't they process rejection like I did?
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And I just couldn't imagine myself that way.
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But what happened is I was working in this business, a machine shop, and I was just doing odd jobs at that point in my life.
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I didn't know what I wanted to do.
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And the owner said, I think you could become one of our salespeople.
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You seem like a smart guy.
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Come up to the office tomorrow and we'll get you started.
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So I went up and he introduced me to the sales manager.
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And the sales manager said, Here's your desk, here's your phone, here's a list of business in the state.
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Start calling them.
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See if they want to do business with us.
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I couldn't make a single cold call.
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I was completely call reluctant.
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That foundational thing of being a successful salesperson, I didn't even know why.
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But what happened is clearly back to the machine shop floor for me, one day and all done.
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But that really frustrated me and really hurt for two reasons.
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One, because I couldn't figure out how I was going to change myself, but I knew I had to.
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But also, this owner, he was the first person who ever believed in me.
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And I let him down.
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And that hurt.
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And I said, I am never going to let that happen again.
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And that began my journey of developing my boldness by just being uncomfortable in so many situations, but just showing up anyway and doing it and trying it and emulating bold people, even though I couldn't figure out how they got that way.
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That early version of Fred, what were you chasing?
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Were you chasing success or were you chasing safety?
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I think I was just hiding.
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I was avoiding anything challenging because I didn't know what I wanted to do, but I also was afraid of putting myself out there.
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I had this fantasy, I want to be a screenwriter, or I want to be, you know, work in Hollywood or something like that.
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But the shift for me was when I discovered the advertising world.
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And I said, Oh, I have found my people.
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I've this is what I could do.
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I couldn't imagine a job that I would be willing to do for decades.
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And that gave me an opportunity to be even bolder because I was being creative.
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And I had also worked in a bunch of businesses, you know, not in a particularly elevated position, but I understood how so many businesses operated, and I understood how the client, the advertising client, that business owner, he wanted ads, but he wanted them to sell stuff, not to make my portfolio look good or for me to have fun or feel creative.
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So what happened is I became really good at pitching the campaigns because I would perform them.
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Because I was in my zone of it wasn't genius yet, but it was like passion.
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And so as a junior copywriter, they were bringing me into these big meetings to present the creative.
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So that was really the beginning.
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You know, that was a turning point.
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Everything has flowed from those two years in that ad agency.
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Right.
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So when you were in the ad agency, was it like uh you mentioned passion?
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Did you discover a passion, if you will, for sales and selling?
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What happened there?
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What let's let's talk about that passion a little bit more.
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No, I had had after that failed sales job, I eventually got other sales jobs where I got training and got somewhat better at it, but I was never strong at it.
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I was never that, you know, the thoroughbred that is the top earner in whatever the business is.
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But I started to understand how sales worked, how you developed this communication, this and led people down a path and learned persuasion and those things.
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And so this information was coming at me about how sales work, but I was selling frozen meat door to door, I was selling payroll systems, I was selling carpeting contracts, I didn't find my passion, but I was building some muscle for what would eventually be important.
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Was when my friend and I started 800 dentists, you start a business, 90% of it is selling.
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You need customers, and so we got to that point where we had to make this thing work because we had family money in it and quit our jobs, and we really had to make it happen.
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We had burned the boats in the harbor, basically, and so we just hit the streets, you know, going door to door.
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We went through 400 dental practices before we found the first 15 to join 800 dentists because we didn't have a business yet, we had a promise, and it promise was true, but so how important is boldness in sales?
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It it is the force amplifier because what you can get all sorts of sales training, you can learn closing techniques, you can learn how to pitch, you can learn objection handling, you can learn all of the ways you need to prospect, but you need the confidence and the boldness to do that training and turn it into sales results, which means you have to be consistent.
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Consistency is the cornerstone of sales success, and what happens is salespeople are inconsistent and they're inconsistent with certain aspects of it.
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They'll be really good at closing, but they're terrible at prospecting, or they're really good at pitching and objection handling, but they can't ask for the order.
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They're offering discounts like in the second sentence just to not lose the sale.
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So the idea is you need to be bold enough so that you're projecting confidence in yourself and your product, and you're doing all of those things that some people are avoiding.
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Uh and there's this great principle that I love.
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Uh it explained everything to me when I heard it because this is after I developed my own framework for how you become bolder.
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And you've probably heard this.
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It's easier to act your way into a new way of thinking than it is to think your way into a new way of acting.
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The way to become bolder is to take bold action, even though you're uncomfortable, even though you don't know how it's going to go.
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But you do it in the proper dosage.
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You do it at a level where the consequences aren't that low.
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You go up and start talking to a stranger.
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The worst thing that could happen is they don't respond.
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And it doesn't matter because you didn't have a relationship anyway.
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But you do that enough, and all of a sudden you get good at talking to people.
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I mean, this is this is like a core level thing that you start to develop this broadening of your confidence.
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And the the operative principle here, the thing I try to get people to understand is they say, Well, I would be bolder if I were more confident.
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And I say, You got it backwards.
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It's bold action that builds your confidence.
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If you're confident, it doesn't require any boldness.
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You're confident about how it's gonna go, you're confident in yourself, in your situation, and in the outcome.
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Boldness is taking action when you don't know how it's gonna go.
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When you're not certain you're not comfortable.
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It's a risk.
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But you do it anyway.
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And what happens is your comfort zone gets bigger and bigger and bigger because of it.
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You're saying that you needn't be confident to be bold.
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Is that a fair point?
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Confidence is built by bold action.
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You don't need confidence to be bold, you just need the will to act, to step up, to take that chance, to put yourself out there, the willingness to be uncomfortable and not know how it's gonna go, and act anyway.
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The willingness to not be good at something.
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Nobody wants to fail.
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We reach 22 and we don't want to fail at anything ever again.
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This is how we learn.
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We learn by failure and feedback and critique, not success and winning all the time.
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So you have to be willing to do those things that probably aren't gonna go right.
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You and I are both keynote speakers.
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Neither of us were good when we started.
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I was terrible, but I got better because I was willing to watch the videos of me sucking and go, like, okay, not gonna do that anymore, not gonna do that anymore, gonna stop pacing, gonna learn to focus on the one by one by one, change my tonality, stop saying um.
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The list goes on and on.
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You get better, but you have to be willing to not be good to get better.
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What's the worst that happens when you step forward boldly, but you're not confident?
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What's the worst that happens?
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You overdose yourself, you create too big an emotional negative experience.
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It's because you overshot hoping that it was gonna go right when the odds were really slim and it was really important to you.
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That's that's where the setbacks come from for people, is they try to take a moonshot when what they need is some baby steps.
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So that's why I talk so much in the pride method, which is what I teach to build your boldness.
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Uh one of the key steps is dosage, control the intensity of your venture into discomfort.
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Don't make it so that you want to be uncomfortable, not devastated.
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You don't want to do something that's gonna push you back into your shell or say, I'm never trying that again.
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That's the worst that can happen is you say, I'm never gonna try that again.
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Because it it was something you wanted, but you OD'd too early and traumatized yourself, and now you're avoiding that thing.
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Like you're a musician, you go, like, I really want to get up in front of people and sing, and it just didn't go well.
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The worst is like people left and or booed you, or whatever the heck happened, or the other band member said, you know, you're so nervous, you're off key all the time.
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You just we don't want you as lead singer anymore.
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And what happens is your dream just died because you you went too far out of the gate.
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You weren't because you wanted to succeed so badly that you wanted to do a quantum leap into success.
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Every overnight success has got 10 years of hard work behind her, you know.
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So you have to accept that.
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You have to accept that it there's there's no shortcuts, there's no easy pathway, there's no all luck and layups, there's just work, there's just persistence, there's just determination, there's just embracing failure as a requisite.
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It's very interesting that you mentioned it's just work.
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Very, very interesting.
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Particularly, we live in a smack culture that says, give us seven days, you'll achieve X, give us 24 hours, you'll achieve Y.
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Go on to social media, five minute five minute, that's a long time.
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60 second video, boom.
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What do you say to that with regards to you mentioned it's just work, given that we live in a smack culture that says the opposite?
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I think that is the greatest impairment is not learning that the only things really worth doing are the things that are really hard to do.
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The real fulfillment comes when you give everything you got and you uh skip the entertainment, skip the distraction.
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Don't go easy on yourself.
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Because you know, it's that same that basic principle hard choices, easy life.
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And easy choices, hard life.
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You couldn't compress wisdom into something shorter, but that's it.
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All the joy and fulfillment comes from putting yourself through the hardest, hardest pathway, chasing those dreams as hard as you can.
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Because even if you don't get there, you don't have any regrets, because you gave it everything you got.
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You tried, you found some way to give everything you got.
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And if it didn't work out, like you know, there's so many people that pursue acting, and a tiny fraction of them become stars, but many, many of them get tremendous fulfillment from the roles that they get to play.
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And it may just be in local theater that that's as far as they get, but they are getting the joy of performing.
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Their dream is real, it's just not fantasy land.
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When it comes to success, and if we presuppose boldness is a big part of that journey, how important is fulfillment when it comes to success?
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I think the fulfillment comes from the journey.
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It's not the goal, it's actually the journey where the fulfillment comes from.
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Because that's really it when you say, Wow, like you and I'll have that every once in a while.
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We connect with an audience so deeply that they're riveted, and they come up to you after, and they was like, That's what I needed to hear.
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I am so glad I was in the room with you.
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I just wanted to thank you and tell you how much this is gonna change my whole life.
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We don't get that all the time.
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If I get an audience of 500 people and one person says that to me, that's fulfillment.
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10% of that audience is gonna think I'm full of it.
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He doesn't know what he's talking about, this doesn't apply to me.
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They're too afraid to try anything, so they have to call me an idiot.
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And I I can't help them, and I don't need to help them.
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And the rest of the people maybe find one or two things that's really interesting, or they were well entertained, and it started them on a path.
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But somebody needed to be in that room that day and hear me say that one thing where she said, that's what I need to start doing.
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That's what's holding me back, is that.
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I spend all my time worrying about how people are judging me.
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And Fred just told me bold people have five people whose opinions matter to them, and the rest they consider none of their business.
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That's who I need to become.
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She comes away with that, and she comes up and tells me, I've had a good month at that point.
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I've real fulfillment comes from the impact you have on other people, not on the stuff you get to buy.
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If you're lucky, you get to buy all that stuff and find out how little happiness you get.
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I've been lucky enough to have the kind of cars I wanted, and know that after three months, it's just a car.
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But other stuff, people I have impacted, people who've come up to me 20 years later and said, You said I just had this happen to me.
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That you said this to me, and I have no recollection of even having the conversation, but this one thing changed the trajectory of their whole life.
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That's fulfillment.
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So jumping into technique to become bold, let's go high level the five part framework for boldness.
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That you have.
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So there are five steps to building boldness, but the principle behind them is again, you're going to act your way into a new way of thinking, is you're going to do bold exercises.
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You're going to build boldness like a muscle.
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Because that's how it builds.
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And just like when you're exercising, you have to be uncomfortable to succeed at exercising.
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If you left the gym, Mo and you said, that was the most comfortable workout I've ever had, I would say, it doesn't sound like you worked out, Mo.
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You know, because we aim for discomfort because we know that's the only way to build muscle.
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Well, discomfort is the only way to build boldness.
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You do it when the consequences are low.
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And the parallel to exercise applies.
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Because we're in the gym.
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I'll use like an athlete, like a famous athlete, like Serena Williams.
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She's in the gym doing squats with 400, 450 pounds.
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At no point does she have 450 pounds on her back while she's playing tennis.
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She's doing those exercises to build her muscles so that she is at her peak playing tennis.
00:24:37.400 --> 00:24:47.320
Boldness exercises are about doing bold action where you're uncomfortable, but the consequences are nominal.
00:24:47.640 --> 00:24:59.320
Talking to strangers in line at a Starbucks, just doing a compliment to a complete stranger, going to a Toastmasters to get up in front of people and speak.
00:24:59.400 --> 00:25:01.320
It's the most supportive environment in the world.
00:25:01.400 --> 00:25:06.120
There's no negative consequences except that you feel uncomfortable.
00:25:06.360 --> 00:25:17.320
There's the psychological one, you are not in danger, and you are not going to embarrass yourself because they're all there deliberately embarrassing themselves.
00:25:18.360 --> 00:25:41.320
The idea of boldness muscle building is you do boldness exercises when the consequences are low, and you do it so that your reflex, when it matters, is to step up, to say yes, to become bolder and do that thing.
00:25:41.480 --> 00:25:50.440
And and then you will likely get the result, or maybe even something better than you expected, but you will have tried no matter what.
00:25:58.519 --> 00:26:05.240
Because you either get when you're presented with an opportunity, you either get a result or a regret.
00:26:05.400 --> 00:26:14.519
And the regret comes from not reaching for the opportunity, whether it went right or well or not, you tried.
00:26:14.759 --> 00:26:16.120
And you can live with that.
00:26:16.279 --> 00:26:28.600
But people get to the end of their lives, and all their regrets are about the things they didn't do, the things they didn't say, the things they didn't try, the things they failed at and messed up, they're all washed away by the passage of time.
00:26:28.759 --> 00:26:31.560
But the regrets, gnaw.
00:26:31.880 --> 00:26:36.680
So it's about doing bold action and preparing yourself.
00:26:36.840 --> 00:26:40.519
Without going too much into the pride method, it's preparation.
00:26:41.080 --> 00:26:43.800
So prepare what you're gonna say to that stranger.
00:26:43.880 --> 00:26:45.880
Oh, I'm gonna compliment her glasses.
00:26:46.120 --> 00:26:47.720
They're really interesting.
00:26:48.600 --> 00:26:49.400
Relax.
00:26:49.560 --> 00:26:52.759
You don't relax by somebody telling you you just need to relax.
00:26:52.920 --> 00:27:01.080
You relax by doing breath work, learning that you can vibrate your vagus nerve and relax yourself in about 30 seconds.
00:27:01.400 --> 00:27:11.000
I brought people on stage in front of a thousand people who've never spoken in their life and relaxed them in a minute and a half so that they were okay.
00:27:11.160 --> 00:27:12.440
They were ready to throw up.
00:27:12.519 --> 00:27:15.880
And a minute and a half later, they were like, I can do this.
00:27:16.279 --> 00:27:25.720
So it's like when you discover you can relax yourself, it's incredibly empowering that it's in your control because a lot of people don't, most people don't even know it's in their control.
00:27:26.120 --> 00:27:36.759
And then some you have some key insights that not everybody's thinking about you anywhere near as much as you think they are, they're thinking about themselves.
00:27:37.000 --> 00:27:39.720
So don't get engaged in that.
00:27:39.960 --> 00:27:44.279
That's critical to just understanding.
00:27:44.360 --> 00:27:51.800
And there's key insights, and I talk about half a dozen of them in my book and in my lectures, and then dosage, like I talked about.
00:27:52.040 --> 00:27:55.960
And then the other key is everyday action.
00:27:56.200 --> 00:28:01.560
Do something every day towards what you want to achieve, even if it's for five minutes.
00:28:02.120 --> 00:28:10.200
Do one bold thing a day, talk to one stranger a day, do something that people would say you're embarrassed about.
00:28:10.360 --> 00:28:13.640
I'll give you a serious example, okay?
00:28:13.880 --> 00:28:18.920
Because people love this when they realize that this is actually possible.
00:28:19.080 --> 00:28:23.640
One of the things I tell people is that embarrassment is a choice.
00:28:24.440 --> 00:28:27.080
You can choose to be embarrassed or not.
00:28:27.240 --> 00:28:33.320
Now I can tell them that, but I can't think them into a new way of acting.
00:28:33.480 --> 00:28:38.440
So what I did in my boldness workshop, it was a two-day workshop.
00:28:38.600 --> 00:28:44.040
At the end of the first day, I said, All right, anybody who wants to do this with me, I'll do it with you.
00:28:44.680 --> 00:28:53.640
The challenge is we're gonna strip down to our underwear and we're gonna walk a city block wearing an adult diaper.
00:28:54.600 --> 00:29:00.279
And half the class actually did it because I had, you know, I've been teaching them how to think boldly.
00:29:00.840 --> 00:29:07.160
And we walk a city block, like 15 of us walking a whole city block, meeting people.
00:29:07.240 --> 00:29:10.680
It was a mall, you know, like an outside mall that we were walking on.
00:29:10.840 --> 00:29:14.120
We get back, and everybody who didn't do it is like, what was it like?
00:29:14.279 --> 00:29:15.480
How it must have been crazy.
00:29:15.880 --> 00:29:18.759
And they went, you know, it was just not a big deal.
00:29:19.640 --> 00:29:25.800
Because they were deliberately doing something quote, embarrassing.
00:29:26.279 --> 00:29:37.160
And instead of trying to tell them that embarrassment is a choice, I get them to act their way into understanding that you can choose not to be embarrassed.
00:29:37.480 --> 00:29:38.040
Right.
00:29:38.279 --> 00:29:39.880
So it's that sort of thing.
00:29:39.960 --> 00:29:46.759
It's like you make a choice to say, I'm gonna do something that's gonna make me uncomfortable, then I'm afraid it's how it's gonna go, whatever.
00:29:47.080 --> 00:29:53.000
But there's no real negative consequences, except psychologically.
00:29:57.080 --> 00:30:10.120
What I'm hearing is you're almost having this group retrain their nervous system because the nervous system and the mind has all these huge consequences of stepping up and being bold.
00:30:10.200 --> 00:30:20.279
And is that your way of saying you have the control to retrain your nervous system, your mind, and also to choose what that output means?
00:30:20.440 --> 00:30:23.800
Is it embarrassing or was it just a fun experience?
00:30:24.120 --> 00:30:24.600
Yeah.
00:30:24.840 --> 00:30:27.480
Let's take it all the way to being an entrepreneur.
00:30:27.640 --> 00:30:40.840
You run this business, you take a shot at it two, three years, and it's just like the marketplace just doesn't care, or the timing's just not right, or you run out of money completely before you get traction.
00:30:42.279 --> 00:30:44.440
The business was a failure.
00:30:44.680 --> 00:30:46.440
You're not a failure.
00:30:46.680 --> 00:30:48.360
That's the difference.
00:30:48.600 --> 00:30:56.120
And when you come away and you say, I don't have to label myself as a failure, I have failures.
00:30:56.759 --> 00:30:59.480
It's 180 degrees different.
00:30:59.720 --> 00:31:08.279
And what happens is for me, I have had some pretty significant failures along the way.
00:31:09.160 --> 00:31:23.560
And because of it, I keep moving up in the risks I'm comfortable taking because I went like, wow, I fell pretty hard back then, and I found my way back, and I'm actually in a better place.
00:32:36.280 --> 00:32:43.640
So the cycle of success and failure on the way up is just a process for me.
00:32:43.720 --> 00:32:48.840
It is not something to be afraid of anymore, and my stress level goes way down.
00:32:49.320 --> 00:32:57.720
There were times when I was$100,000 from the business losing all of its credit at one point.
00:32:58.760 --> 00:33:03.480
And I said, I have figured out my way out of stuff.
00:33:03.560 --> 00:33:05.800
And if I don't, I don't.
00:33:06.360 --> 00:33:14.440
It's not that I am a failure, it's that I failed on trying, on taking a big swing.
00:33:15.400 --> 00:33:26.520
Because otherwise, you live a life of quiet desperation, of mediocrity, and you get to the finish line, and all you got is a stack of regrets.
00:33:27.000 --> 00:33:34.200
I'm not gonna have many regrets because I've tried so much.
00:33:35.240 --> 00:33:37.960
Are there gonna be things I wish I did differently?
00:33:38.120 --> 00:33:39.240
Oh, yeah.
00:33:39.880 --> 00:33:43.400
But next time that won't be the case.
00:33:43.640 --> 00:33:45.080
I will be wiser.
00:33:48.520 --> 00:33:53.000
It sounds like boldness is another metaphor for just keep trying.
00:33:53.800 --> 00:33:57.160
Go for it, keep trying, and then let's see what happens.
00:33:57.320 --> 00:33:58.040
Let's go there.
00:33:59.000 --> 00:34:05.080
Yeah, it's it is, it's really become somebody who says yes, okay.
00:34:05.560 --> 00:34:09.559
Step up, speak up, say, yeah, I'll try that.
00:34:09.880 --> 00:34:11.400
Yeah, that scares me.
00:34:11.639 --> 00:34:12.679
Sign me up.
00:34:13.880 --> 00:34:15.079
That's the difference.
00:34:15.240 --> 00:34:18.840
Instead of saying, Oh no, no, I hate public speaking.
00:34:19.240 --> 00:34:23.720
There's all these speakers, none of them are dropping dead on stage, okay?
00:34:23.880 --> 00:34:26.519
That's not happening, it's not killing them.
00:34:26.760 --> 00:34:28.280
They learn to do it.
00:34:28.920 --> 00:34:32.679
Many of them, like me, were not comfortable.
00:34:33.079 --> 00:34:39.720
My shirt would be drenched in my first five or ten lectures because I was so anxious.
00:34:40.200 --> 00:34:41.880
But I got better.
00:34:42.039 --> 00:34:44.360
I get better and better, and I'm still getting better.
00:34:44.519 --> 00:34:51.320
I'll probably be 20 or 30 percent better by next year, because I'm trying new stuff.
00:34:51.559 --> 00:34:59.480
It takes boldness to ask for feedback, critique, like tell me what I'm doing wrong.
00:34:59.720 --> 00:35:08.200
Because success feels great, all the learning happens from the feedback and the criticism and the failures.
00:35:09.079 --> 00:35:13.400
So if you want to be a lifelong learner, that's the deal.
00:35:13.720 --> 00:35:19.800
Lifelong learning doesn't mean an unbroken stream of successes, it means the opposite.
00:35:20.439 --> 00:35:24.279
So it sounds like failures, consequences, results.
00:35:24.599 --> 00:35:35.159
Whatever happens with these three lanes, if you will, pale in comparison to regret at the end of the journey if there's just been stagnation.
00:35:35.319 --> 00:35:36.599
Is that a fair point?
00:35:37.480 --> 00:35:40.119
Life is short, is the reality.
00:35:40.439 --> 00:35:41.960
We're in the game of life.
00:35:42.119 --> 00:35:45.960
Why wouldn't you want to be on the court instead of the sidelines?
00:35:46.759 --> 00:35:50.359
Because you don't know how long the coach is gonna let you play.
00:35:50.919 --> 00:35:58.759
Unlike the real games, the coaches put you in the game, play, get off the bench.
00:35:59.159 --> 00:36:01.960
The coach isn't never benching you.
00:36:02.359 --> 00:36:10.919
It's a metaphor for God or the universe or whatever your faith is, but the coach has put you in and will never bench you.
00:36:11.079 --> 00:36:24.279
You will bench yourself, and the coach will grieve that, but he's letting you, she's letting you, whatever that entity is that you find faith and support from.
00:36:25.879 --> 00:36:33.639
But there is also a clock that's been set for how long you're gonna get to play, and you don't know what it is.
00:36:33.719 --> 00:36:39.159
It's not 60 minutes, it's not 90 minutes, you don't know.
00:36:39.479 --> 00:37:06.679
So you want to leave it all on the court, you want to leave it all on the mat, you want to leave it all on the pitch because it will be uh, you know, I've lost enough friends over the years where where death is a reality, it's not this something in the future, and so I want to give it everything, I want to be thoroughly depleted on my last day.
00:37:06.839 --> 00:37:22.119
I want to have tried everything crazy that I could come up with, and hopefully had a significant impact on people and lived a purposeful life, a life of leaning, yeah.
00:37:23.079 --> 00:37:25.319
Some would say a purpose-driven life.
00:37:26.439 --> 00:37:53.719
Yeah, what I love so much about this share, Fred, is oftentimes we talk about the opposite, where uh you're 80 years old, in that rocking chair, 90 years old in that rocking chair, beyond that, and then there's this moment when you go, if I'd been bold this whole time, life would have turned out differently.
00:37:54.279 --> 00:37:58.839
Does that sort of sentiment govern why you do the work that you do?
00:37:59.719 --> 00:38:09.319
I think you need there's a great term that I've learned from Daniel Pink, that fabulous author, who's written so many great books.
00:38:09.959 --> 00:38:14.039
He puts out the idea of anticipated regret.
00:38:14.999 --> 00:38:29.319
When you're struggling to whether you should try this or not, take a few minutes and think about how much you'll regret not doing it next year, five years from now, 10 years from now.
00:38:30.359 --> 00:38:42.279
Let that be the motivation to take the risk, to be uncomfortable, to try that difficult thing, to step up rather than step back.
00:38:42.599 --> 00:38:50.439
Every successful entrepreneur I know is a person who steps up when other people would step back.
00:38:50.599 --> 00:38:53.319
Other person might say, I don't think this is gonna work.
00:38:53.479 --> 00:38:55.399
I got to find some security.
00:38:55.799 --> 00:39:03.079
The bold person says, I'm gonna let them try to take me down, but I'm gonna wake up today and keep swinging.
00:39:03.399 --> 00:39:10.359
And those are the guys that succeed, they create extraordinary businesses, usually after three failures.
00:39:10.759 --> 00:39:14.999
They go, Wow, that failure, look at the information from this.
00:39:15.959 --> 00:39:27.079
You can grieve it, you gotta give yourself time to grieve that thing that didn't go right, but don't indulge it, don't embrace it, and don't turn it into self-definition.
00:39:27.639 --> 00:39:31.799
Don't let it define you, let it refine you.
00:39:34.599 --> 00:39:35.239
Love that.
00:39:35.399 --> 00:39:38.039
Don't let it define you, let it refine you.
00:39:38.279 --> 00:39:53.959
And you mentioned earlier that boldness is when you say yes to things, and someone else that says this, say yes to the thing, if I can say that, and then figure out how to do it by the time that time comes around.
00:39:54.199 --> 00:39:57.399
I paraphrase, of course, is Sir Richard Branson.
00:39:57.959 --> 00:40:00.599
I've heard the story a couple of times.
00:40:00.839 --> 00:40:04.039
I could hear the story a bunch more times.
00:40:04.279 --> 00:40:09.239
Let's hear the story about how you beat Sir Richard Branson at chess.
00:40:09.559 --> 00:40:11.239
Yes, he loves playing chess.
00:40:11.479 --> 00:40:15.079
And so I was on Necker Island, one of the islands he owns.
00:40:15.239 --> 00:40:20.839
I was there with a group of business people, and the playing tennis, I ruptured my Achilles tendon.
00:40:21.079 --> 00:40:23.879
So I'm just sitting there watching people play.
00:40:24.039 --> 00:40:31.239
And Richard, who just happened to be on the island, not always there, he doesn't live on the island, but sometimes he bounces in to meet people.
00:40:31.399 --> 00:40:37.959
He hears what happened to me, and he comes up to me and he says, Oh, this is such a bother that this has happened to you.
00:40:38.279 --> 00:40:39.719
Do you play chess?
00:40:39.959 --> 00:40:43.719
Now, the correct answer is, I haven't played chess in 40 years.
00:40:43.959 --> 00:40:46.839
So I'm thinking, oh, he's gonna beat me in five moves.
00:40:47.159 --> 00:40:48.359
He's gonna think I'm an idiot.
00:40:48.439 --> 00:40:50.919
He's gonna wonder why the heck I said I could play chess.
00:40:50.999 --> 00:40:52.519
It's gonna be embarrassing.
00:40:52.839 --> 00:40:55.159
But I said, Yeah, I play chess.
00:40:55.559 --> 00:41:00.119
And so he had somebody bring a chessboard over and we sit and we play.
00:41:00.359 --> 00:41:09.479
And I'm playing such a disorienting game because I'm remembering how to play literally as I play, that I have all these open defenses.
00:41:09.639 --> 00:41:16.919
So he's on attack mode, and I see this move and I just make it and I say, uh, Richard, that's check.
00:41:17.079 --> 00:41:18.519
Actually, it's checkmate.
00:41:18.679 --> 00:41:27.479
And he looks down at the board in shock, and he looks up at me and he calls me a nasty name and sets the board up again immediately to play.
00:41:28.279 --> 00:41:31.639
But the thing is, we had normal conversations.
00:41:31.719 --> 00:41:33.559
I talked to him like a regular person.
00:41:33.719 --> 00:41:38.599
I didn't interview him or ask for business advice or, God forbid, an investment.
00:41:38.759 --> 00:41:40.999
He doesn't need, he's a billionaire, he doesn't need that.
00:41:41.239 --> 00:41:49.959
I know how, because of all my experience being bold and treating everyone as an equal, that I treated him like a regular person.
00:41:50.199 --> 00:42:00.439
For the rest of the week, he came looking for me to play chess again because he enjoyed our conversations as well as beating me, because he beat me every other time.
00:42:00.679 --> 00:42:03.719
Because he's a very competitive person, which is fabulous.
00:42:04.039 --> 00:42:08.759
But we just had these wonderful interactions, and other people were complaining.
00:42:08.839 --> 00:42:12.199
They're going, like, oh, you're you're monopolizing Richard.
00:42:12.839 --> 00:42:14.199
Well, I want to talk to him too.
00:42:14.359 --> 00:42:20.839
I went like, he's asking me to sit across from him at dinner so we can keep you guys off him.
00:42:21.959 --> 00:42:27.559
So, but the whole point is, you need to seize the moments.
00:42:27.719 --> 00:42:29.879
There are times when you need to say yes.
00:42:30.199 --> 00:42:32.519
Imagine if I said no.
00:42:34.279 --> 00:42:35.479
Oh, I don't play chess.
00:42:35.639 --> 00:42:37.719
He would have said, Oh, well, that's too bad.
00:42:37.799 --> 00:42:39.159
I hope you get better.
00:42:39.479 --> 00:42:44.599
What a regret that would have been compared to what I got out of it.
00:42:44.679 --> 00:42:50.119
Because I've run into him a couple more times since at events, and I said, I look forward to playing chess again with you.
00:42:50.199 --> 00:42:51.799
And he goes, How about right now?
00:42:52.119 --> 00:42:54.359
And he makes somebody find a chess board.
00:42:54.679 --> 00:42:58.599
The point is, you don't have all the time in the world.
00:42:58.759 --> 00:43:00.999
It's Carpe Diem, seize the day.
00:43:01.239 --> 00:43:06.039
Most opportunities you don't have all day, you have to seize the moments.
00:43:06.359 --> 00:43:10.999
I had one second to say yes or no to Sir Richard.
00:43:13.719 --> 00:43:16.919
What a regret or what an amazing result.
00:43:19.079 --> 00:43:21.159
That is such an outstanding story.
00:43:21.399 --> 00:43:33.159
And to finish up, if you could challenge every listener to one act of boldness in the next 72 hours, you can edit the time if you want.
00:43:33.319 --> 00:43:34.119
What would that be?
00:43:34.279 --> 00:43:35.719
One act of boldness.
00:43:36.119 --> 00:43:39.079
Okay, so we talked about talking to strangers.
00:43:39.319 --> 00:43:48.039
I want you to do something that deliberately makes you uncomfortable, where there are no negative consequences except in your head.
00:43:48.279 --> 00:43:58.119
One of the exercises, and you can do this anywhere, is if you see a sign on the door that says employees only, go in.
00:43:59.319 --> 00:44:06.679
And listen to the voice in your head that says, Oh, you can't go in there, they're gonna just kick me out, they're gonna be this like you're going in to get kicked out.
00:44:07.719 --> 00:44:09.479
But you know what'll happen?
00:44:09.719 --> 00:44:12.359
Nothing, nobody will say anything.
00:44:12.519 --> 00:44:15.159
The only thing keeping you out is the sign on the door.
00:44:15.319 --> 00:44:25.399
If it's unlocked, go in and realize that nobody's gonna beat you to death, nobody's gonna arrest you.
00:44:25.879 --> 00:44:29.319
They might say, excuse me, this is for employees only.
00:44:29.399 --> 00:44:30.999
And I have the response to that.
00:44:31.159 --> 00:44:34.119
You say, Well, I am an employee, just not here.
00:44:34.839 --> 00:44:41.479
And they will look at you like you're an idiot, but you're doing a boldness exercise aiming for failure.
00:44:41.799 --> 00:44:44.359
So if they get kicked out, you won.
00:44:45.159 --> 00:44:48.919
And you were trying to be an idiot, so you can't be embarrassed about it.
00:44:49.079 --> 00:44:55.159
You were deliberately doing something that should go wrong, but there are no negative consequences.
00:44:55.319 --> 00:45:00.519
So do that in the next two days, find a door and go in.
00:45:02.519 --> 00:45:08.759
Fred, it's been so outstanding having you here as a guest on Purpose Driven Success Podcast.
00:45:08.999 --> 00:45:12.439
If someone wants to learn more from you, where do we send them?
00:45:12.759 --> 00:45:15.799
Easiest place is fredjoyle.com.
00:45:15.959 --> 00:45:18.999
My last name is spelled like Royal, J-O-Y-A-L.
00:45:19.399 --> 00:45:20.999
But you can learn a lot about me.
00:45:21.079 --> 00:45:24.999
I'm Fred Joyle on everything LinkedIn, Facebook, Instagram.
00:45:25.719 --> 00:45:36.199
You can also book a half hour with me right on my website and we can have a conversation, see you know how I can impact your life or your team or your business.
00:45:37.399 --> 00:45:39.479
Fred, it's been absolutely awesome.
00:45:39.639 --> 00:45:41.479
Have an amazing rest of today.
00:45:41.719 --> 00:45:42.439
I sure will.
00:45:42.519 --> 00:45:43.079
Thanks, Mo.
00:45:43.319 --> 00:45:44.519
Great to see you.
00:45:45.079 --> 00:45:48.279
Thank you for listening to Purpose Driven Success with Mo Salami.
00:45:48.679 --> 00:45:52.599
If you enjoyed this episode, please subscribe and leave a review.
00:45:52.759 --> 00:45:55.799
It's one of the best ways to help others discover the show.
00:45:56.039 --> 00:46:00.119
You can find links and resources and show notes at our website.
00:46:00.279 --> 00:46:06.999
And if today's episode inspired you, check out one of our other insight-filled, value-packed episodes.
00:46:07.159 --> 00:46:14.599
Next week we'll have another amazing guest, so stay tuned for even more real stories and actionable insights.
00:46:14.839 --> 00:46:23.479
Work on your mindset, work on your skill set, and always move in the direction of the result you want before you see the result you want.
00:46:23.559 --> 00:46:27.079
And until next time, do the best you can consistently.
00:46:27.399 --> 00:46:28.199
Ciao.
00:00:00.080 --> 00:00:03.520
And so I was on Necker Island, one of the islands he owns.
00:00:03.600 --> 00:00:05.599
I was there with a group of business people.
00:00:05.839 --> 00:00:09.199
And the playing tennis, I ruptured my Achilles tendon.
00:00:09.519 --> 00:00:12.320
So I'm just sitting there watching people play.
00:00:12.480 --> 00:00:15.679
And Richard, who just happened to be on the island, is not always there.
00:00:15.839 --> 00:00:19.600
He doesn't live on the island, but sometimes he bounces in to meet people.
00:00:19.839 --> 00:00:26.320
He hears what happened to me and he comes up to me and he says, Oh, this is such a bother that this has happened to you.
00:00:26.640 --> 00:00:28.160
Do you play chess?
00:00:28.399 --> 00:00:32.079
Now the correct answer is, I haven't played chess in 40 years.
00:00:32.399 --> 00:00:35.200
So I'm thinking, oh, he's gonna beat me in five moves.
00:00:35.600 --> 00:00:36.799
He's gonna think I'm an idiot.
00:00:36.880 --> 00:00:39.280
He's gonna wonder why the heck I said I could play chess.
00:00:39.359 --> 00:00:40.880
It's gonna be embarrassing.
00:00:41.200 --> 00:00:43.520
But I said, Yeah, I play chess.
00:00:49.439 --> 00:00:59.280
Welcome to purpose-driven success with Mo Salami, where real journeys, mindset shifts, and strategic insights meet purpose-driven success.
00:00:59.520 --> 00:01:01.679
I'm your host, Mo Salami.
00:01:02.240 --> 00:01:16.159
Every week we dive into real conversations with high-achieving founders and leaders, uncovering the mindset, strategies, and takeaways that help you define and achieve success on your own terms.
00:01:17.439 --> 00:01:22.719
Welcome to another episode of Purpose Driven Success.
00:01:22.959 --> 00:01:26.000
Today we have the creme de la creme of guests.
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I call him the guest de la guest.
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Today's guest is Fred Joyle, entrepreneur, speaker, and best-selling author of Super Bold.
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Fred co-founded Future Don Six, the company behind 1-800 Dentists, which generated over a billion dollars in revenue across three decades.
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But what makes Fred's story so compelling isn't just the business success, it's the transformation behind it.
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He went from being deeply unconfident and uncomfortable being seen to becoming someone who teaches boldness, communication, and personal reinvention around the world.
00:02:03.760 --> 00:02:14.080
In this conversation, we'll explore mindset shifts, habits, and uncomfortable decisions that helped Fred redefine success on his own terms.
00:02:14.319 --> 00:02:19.599
Also, somehow, he once beat Sir Richard Branson at chess, which we definitely have to talk about.
00:02:19.840 --> 00:02:24.319
Fred Joy, welcome to purpose-driven success.
00:02:24.560 --> 00:02:26.319
Welcome, welcome, welcome, Fred.
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Mo, thank you so much for being here.
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I look forward to this conversation.
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We developed this really tight friendship very quickly, and I want to bring as much value as I can to your followers, your audience.
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Awesome.
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Let's get into it.
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Fred, you have some amazing frameworks and ideas.
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You're such a visionary.
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Before we get there, I want to start with your own story in your way.
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When you look back at your journey from where you started to becoming a boldness coach, of course, you're much more than that.
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What are the defining chapters that shaped who you are today?
00:03:02.800 --> 00:03:04.800
There was a turning point in my life.
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I was an introvert.
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I was very shy.
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And it kept me from experiencing the life that I wanted.
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And it would frustrate me.
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And I would see bold people, and I wouldn't understand why they were like that.
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Why they didn't stop themselves like I did.
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Why didn't they process rejection like I did?
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And I just couldn't imagine myself that way.
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But what happened is I was working in this business, a machine shop, and I was just doing odd jobs at that point in my life.
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I didn't know what I wanted to do.
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And the owner said, I think you could become one of our salespeople.
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You seem like a smart guy.
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Come up to the office tomorrow and we'll get you started.
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So I went up and he introduced me to the sales manager.
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And the sales manager said, Here's your desk, here's your phone, here's a list of business in the state.
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Start calling them.
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See if they want to do business with us.
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I couldn't make a single cold call.
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I was completely call reluctant.
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That foundational thing of being a successful salesperson, I didn't even know why.
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But what happened is clearly back to the machine shop floor for me, one day and all done.
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But that really frustrated me and really hurt for two reasons.
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One, because I couldn't figure out how I was going to change myself, but I knew I had to.
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But also, this owner, he was the first person who ever believed in me.
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And I let him down.
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And that hurt.
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And I said, I am never going to let that happen again.
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And that began my journey of developing my boldness by just being uncomfortable in so many situations, but just showing up anyway and doing it and trying it and emulating bold people, even though I couldn't figure out how they got that way.
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That early version of Fred, what were you chasing?
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Were you chasing success or were you chasing safety?
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I think I was just hiding.
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I was avoiding anything challenging because I didn't know what I wanted to do, but I also was afraid of putting myself out there.
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I had this fantasy, I want to be a screenwriter, or I want to be, you know, work in Hollywood or something like that.
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But the shift for me was when I discovered the advertising world.
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And I said, Oh, I have found my people.
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I've this is what I could do.
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I couldn't imagine a job that I would be willing to do for decades.
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And that gave me an opportunity to be even bolder because I was being creative.
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And I had also worked in a bunch of businesses, you know, not in a particularly elevated position, but I understood how so many businesses operated, and I understood how the client, the advertising client, that business owner, he wanted ads, but he wanted them to sell stuff, not to make my portfolio look good or for me to have fun or feel creative.
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So what happened is I became really good at pitching the campaigns because I would perform them.
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Because I was in my zone of it wasn't genius yet, but it was like passion.
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And so as a junior copywriter, they were bringing me into these big meetings to present the creative.
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So that was really the beginning.
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You know, that was a turning point.
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Everything has flowed from those two years in that ad agency.
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Right.
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So when you were in the ad agency, was it like uh you mentioned passion?
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Did you discover a passion, if you will, for sales and selling?
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What happened there?
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What let's let's talk about that passion a little bit more.
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No, I had had after that failed sales job, I eventually got other sales jobs where I got training and got somewhat better at it, but I was never strong at it.
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I was never that, you know, the thoroughbred that is the top earner in whatever the business is.
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But I started to understand how sales worked, how you developed this communication, this and led people down a path and learned persuasion and those things.
00:08:09.439 --> 00:08:31.040
And so this information was coming at me about how sales work, but I was selling frozen meat door to door, I was selling payroll systems, I was selling carpeting contracts, I didn't find my passion, but I was building some muscle for what would eventually be important.
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Was when my friend and I started 800 dentists, you start a business, 90% of it is selling.
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You need customers, and so we got to that point where we had to make this thing work because we had family money in it and quit our jobs, and we really had to make it happen.
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We had burned the boats in the harbor, basically, and so we just hit the streets, you know, going door to door.
00:09:03.440 --> 00:09:23.600
We went through 400 dental practices before we found the first 15 to join 800 dentists because we didn't have a business yet, we had a promise, and it promise was true, but so how important is boldness in sales?
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It it is the force amplifier because what you can get all sorts of sales training, you can learn closing techniques, you can learn how to pitch, you can learn objection handling, you can learn all of the ways you need to prospect, but you need the confidence and the boldness to do that training and turn it into sales results, which means you have to be consistent.
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Consistency is the cornerstone of sales success, and what happens is salespeople are inconsistent and they're inconsistent with certain aspects of it.
00:10:06.000 --> 00:10:18.159
They'll be really good at closing, but they're terrible at prospecting, or they're really good at pitching and objection handling, but they can't ask for the order.
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They're offering discounts like in the second sentence just to not lose the sale.
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So the idea is you need to be bold enough so that you're projecting confidence in yourself and your product, and you're doing all of those things that some people are avoiding.
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Uh and there's this great principle that I love.
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Uh it explained everything to me when I heard it because this is after I developed my own framework for how you become bolder.
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And you've probably heard this.
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It's easier to act your way into a new way of thinking than it is to think your way into a new way of acting.
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The way to become bolder is to take bold action, even though you're uncomfortable, even though you don't know how it's going to go.
00:11:13.679 --> 00:11:16.240
But you do it in the proper dosage.
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You do it at a level where the consequences aren't that low.
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You go up and start talking to a stranger.
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The worst thing that could happen is they don't respond.
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And it doesn't matter because you didn't have a relationship anyway.
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But you do that enough, and all of a sudden you get good at talking to people.
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I mean, this is this is like a core level thing that you start to develop this broadening of your confidence.
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And the the operative principle here, the thing I try to get people to understand is they say, Well, I would be bolder if I were more confident.
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And I say, You got it backwards.
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It's bold action that builds your confidence.
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If you're confident, it doesn't require any boldness.
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You're confident about how it's gonna go, you're confident in yourself, in your situation, and in the outcome.
00:12:10.159 --> 00:12:14.960
Boldness is taking action when you don't know how it's gonna go.
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When you're not certain you're not comfortable.
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It's a risk.
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But you do it anyway.
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And what happens is your comfort zone gets bigger and bigger and bigger because of it.
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You're saying that you needn't be confident to be bold.
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Is that a fair point?
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Confidence is built by bold action.
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You don't need confidence to be bold, you just need the will to act, to step up, to take that chance, to put yourself out there, the willingness to be uncomfortable and not know how it's gonna go, and act anyway.
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The willingness to not be good at something.
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Nobody wants to fail.
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We reach 22 and we don't want to fail at anything ever again.
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This is how we learn.
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We learn by failure and feedback and critique, not success and winning all the time.
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So you have to be willing to do those things that probably aren't gonna go right.
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You and I are both keynote speakers.
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Neither of us were good when we started.
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I was terrible, but I got better because I was willing to watch the videos of me sucking and go, like, okay, not gonna do that anymore, not gonna do that anymore, gonna stop pacing, gonna learn to focus on the one by one by one, change my tonality, stop saying um.
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The list goes on and on.
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You get better, but you have to be willing to not be good to get better.
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What's the worst that happens when you step forward boldly, but you're not confident?
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What's the worst that happens?
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You overdose yourself, you create too big an emotional negative experience.
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It's because you overshot hoping that it was gonna go right when the odds were really slim and it was really important to you.
00:14:27.840 --> 00:14:36.080
That's that's where the setbacks come from for people, is they try to take a moonshot when what they need is some baby steps.
00:14:36.799 --> 00:14:43.279
So that's why I talk so much in the pride method, which is what I teach to build your boldness.
00:14:43.440 --> 00:14:51.840
Uh one of the key steps is dosage, control the intensity of your venture into discomfort.
00:14:52.320 --> 00:14:58.000
Don't make it so that you want to be uncomfortable, not devastated.
00:14:59.360 --> 00:15:06.559
You don't want to do something that's gonna push you back into your shell or say, I'm never trying that again.
00:15:07.600 --> 00:15:12.399
That's the worst that can happen is you say, I'm never gonna try that again.
00:15:13.039 --> 00:15:23.120
Because it it was something you wanted, but you OD'd too early and traumatized yourself, and now you're avoiding that thing.
00:15:23.360 --> 00:15:30.639
Like you're a musician, you go, like, I really want to get up in front of people and sing, and it just didn't go well.
00:15:31.840 --> 00:15:42.320
The worst is like people left and or booed you, or whatever the heck happened, or the other band member said, you know, you're so nervous, you're off key all the time.
00:15:42.399 --> 00:15:45.759
You just we don't want you as lead singer anymore.
00:15:46.000 --> 00:15:56.080
And what happens is your dream just died because you you went too far out of the gate.
00:15:56.159 --> 00:16:03.039
You weren't because you wanted to succeed so badly that you wanted to do a quantum leap into success.
00:16:03.919 --> 00:16:09.200
Every overnight success has got 10 years of hard work behind her, you know.
00:16:09.519 --> 00:16:12.000
So you have to accept that.
00:16:12.080 --> 00:16:29.600
You have to accept that it there's there's no shortcuts, there's no easy pathway, there's no all luck and layups, there's just work, there's just persistence, there's just determination, there's just embracing failure as a requisite.
00:17:42.759 --> 00:17:45.960
It's very interesting that you mentioned it's just work.
00:17:46.200 --> 00:17:47.319
Very, very interesting.
00:17:47.640 --> 00:17:55.400
Particularly, we live in a smack culture that says, give us seven days, you'll achieve X, give us 24 hours, you'll achieve Y.
00:17:55.559 --> 00:17:59.319
Go on to social media, five minute five minute, that's a long time.
00:17:59.480 --> 00:18:01.480
60 second video, boom.
00:18:02.279 --> 00:18:10.120
What do you say to that with regards to you mentioned it's just work, given that we live in a smack culture that says the opposite?
00:18:11.480 --> 00:18:24.440
I think that is the greatest impairment is not learning that the only things really worth doing are the things that are really hard to do.
00:18:25.720 --> 00:18:36.600
The real fulfillment comes when you give everything you got and you uh skip the entertainment, skip the distraction.
00:18:37.560 --> 00:18:40.040
Don't go easy on yourself.
00:18:41.640 --> 00:18:48.040
Because you know, it's that same that basic principle hard choices, easy life.
00:18:50.519 --> 00:18:53.400
And easy choices, hard life.
00:18:54.600 --> 00:18:59.560
You couldn't compress wisdom into something shorter, but that's it.
00:19:00.440 --> 00:19:10.600
All the joy and fulfillment comes from putting yourself through the hardest, hardest pathway, chasing those dreams as hard as you can.
00:19:10.840 --> 00:19:18.120
Because even if you don't get there, you don't have any regrets, because you gave it everything you got.
00:19:18.360 --> 00:19:25.640
You tried, you found some way to give everything you got.
00:19:25.800 --> 00:19:40.920
And if it didn't work out, like you know, there's so many people that pursue acting, and a tiny fraction of them become stars, but many, many of them get tremendous fulfillment from the roles that they get to play.
00:19:41.080 --> 00:19:49.960
And it may just be in local theater that that's as far as they get, but they are getting the joy of performing.
00:19:50.120 --> 00:19:54.200
Their dream is real, it's just not fantasy land.
00:19:56.360 --> 00:20:06.279
When it comes to success, and if we presuppose boldness is a big part of that journey, how important is fulfillment when it comes to success?
00:20:07.960 --> 00:20:13.400
I think the fulfillment comes from the journey.
00:20:13.560 --> 00:20:18.360
It's not the goal, it's actually the journey where the fulfillment comes from.
00:20:18.600 --> 00:20:26.440
Because that's really it when you say, Wow, like you and I'll have that every once in a while.
00:20:26.759 --> 00:20:37.080
We connect with an audience so deeply that they're riveted, and they come up to you after, and they was like, That's what I needed to hear.
00:20:38.040 --> 00:20:40.279
I am so glad I was in the room with you.
00:20:40.360 --> 00:20:45.720
I just wanted to thank you and tell you how much this is gonna change my whole life.
00:20:46.279 --> 00:20:48.120
We don't get that all the time.
00:20:48.360 --> 00:20:55.240
If I get an audience of 500 people and one person says that to me, that's fulfillment.
00:20:56.519 --> 00:21:00.040
10% of that audience is gonna think I'm full of it.
00:21:00.920 --> 00:21:04.040
He doesn't know what he's talking about, this doesn't apply to me.
00:21:04.200 --> 00:21:09.960
They're too afraid to try anything, so they have to call me an idiot.
00:21:10.279 --> 00:21:13.480
And I I can't help them, and I don't need to help them.
00:21:13.720 --> 00:21:22.040
And the rest of the people maybe find one or two things that's really interesting, or they were well entertained, and it started them on a path.
00:21:22.360 --> 00:21:36.360
But somebody needed to be in that room that day and hear me say that one thing where she said, that's what I need to start doing.
00:21:36.840 --> 00:21:39.560
That's what's holding me back, is that.
00:21:44.920 --> 00:21:49.400
I spend all my time worrying about how people are judging me.
00:21:49.560 --> 00:21:58.120
And Fred just told me bold people have five people whose opinions matter to them, and the rest they consider none of their business.
00:21:58.360 --> 00:22:00.519
That's who I need to become.
00:22:00.920 --> 00:22:07.000
She comes away with that, and she comes up and tells me, I've had a good month at that point.
00:22:07.160 --> 00:22:15.480
I've real fulfillment comes from the impact you have on other people, not on the stuff you get to buy.
00:22:15.720 --> 00:22:22.200
If you're lucky, you get to buy all that stuff and find out how little happiness you get.
00:22:23.800 --> 00:22:32.759
I've been lucky enough to have the kind of cars I wanted, and know that after three months, it's just a car.
00:22:34.440 --> 00:22:43.720
But other stuff, people I have impacted, people who've come up to me 20 years later and said, You said I just had this happen to me.
00:22:43.800 --> 00:22:56.519
That you said this to me, and I have no recollection of even having the conversation, but this one thing changed the trajectory of their whole life.
00:22:57.560 --> 00:22:59.560
That's fulfillment.
00:23:01.400 --> 00:23:11.000
So jumping into technique to become bold, let's go high level the five part framework for boldness.
00:23:11.240 --> 00:23:11.800
That you have.
00:23:13.480 --> 00:23:29.000
So there are five steps to building boldness, but the principle behind them is again, you're going to act your way into a new way of thinking, is you're going to do bold exercises.
00:23:29.160 --> 00:23:32.040
You're going to build boldness like a muscle.
00:23:33.240 --> 00:23:35.080
Because that's how it builds.
00:23:35.160 --> 00:23:41.000
And just like when you're exercising, you have to be uncomfortable to succeed at exercising.
00:23:41.080 --> 00:23:49.160
If you left the gym, Mo and you said, that was the most comfortable workout I've ever had, I would say, it doesn't sound like you worked out, Mo.
00:23:49.800 --> 00:23:56.440
You know, because we aim for discomfort because we know that's the only way to build muscle.
00:23:56.600 --> 00:24:00.200
Well, discomfort is the only way to build boldness.
00:24:01.400 --> 00:24:04.440
You do it when the consequences are low.
00:24:04.600 --> 00:24:07.960
And the parallel to exercise applies.
00:24:08.279 --> 00:24:10.920
Because we're in the gym.
00:24:11.320 --> 00:24:15.560
I'll use like an athlete, like a famous athlete, like Serena Williams.
00:24:15.720 --> 00:24:21.720
She's in the gym doing squats with 400, 450 pounds.
00:24:22.200 --> 00:24:28.519
At no point does she have 450 pounds on her back while she's playing tennis.
00:24:28.840 --> 00:24:36.840
She's doing those exercises to build her muscles so that she is at her peak playing tennis.
00:24:37.400 --> 00:24:47.320
Boldness exercises are about doing bold action where you're uncomfortable, but the consequences are nominal.
00:24:47.640 --> 00:24:59.320
Talking to strangers in line at a Starbucks, just doing a compliment to a complete stranger, going to a Toastmasters to get up in front of people and speak.
00:24:59.400 --> 00:25:01.320
It's the most supportive environment in the world.
00:25:01.400 --> 00:25:06.120
There's no negative consequences except that you feel uncomfortable.
00:25:06.360 --> 00:25:17.320
There's the psychological one, you are not in danger, and you are not going to embarrass yourself because they're all there deliberately embarrassing themselves.
00:25:18.360 --> 00:25:41.320
The idea of boldness muscle building is you do boldness exercises when the consequences are low, and you do it so that your reflex, when it matters, is to step up, to say yes, to become bolder and do that thing.
00:25:41.480 --> 00:25:50.440
And and then you will likely get the result, or maybe even something better than you expected, but you will have tried no matter what.
00:25:58.519 --> 00:26:05.240
Because you either get when you're presented with an opportunity, you either get a result or a regret.
00:26:05.400 --> 00:26:14.519
And the regret comes from not reaching for the opportunity, whether it went right or well or not, you tried.
00:26:14.759 --> 00:26:16.120
And you can live with that.
00:26:16.279 --> 00:26:28.600
But people get to the end of their lives, and all their regrets are about the things they didn't do, the things they didn't say, the things they didn't try, the things they failed at and messed up, they're all washed away by the passage of time.
00:26:28.759 --> 00:26:31.560
But the regrets, gnaw.
00:26:31.880 --> 00:26:36.680
So it's about doing bold action and preparing yourself.
00:26:36.840 --> 00:26:40.519
Without going too much into the pride method, it's preparation.
00:26:41.080 --> 00:26:43.800
So prepare what you're gonna say to that stranger.
00:26:43.880 --> 00:26:45.880
Oh, I'm gonna compliment her glasses.
00:26:46.120 --> 00:26:47.720
They're really interesting.
00:26:48.600 --> 00:26:49.400
Relax.
00:26:49.560 --> 00:26:52.759
You don't relax by somebody telling you you just need to relax.
00:26:52.920 --> 00:27:01.080
You relax by doing breath work, learning that you can vibrate your vagus nerve and relax yourself in about 30 seconds.
00:27:01.400 --> 00:27:11.000
I brought people on stage in front of a thousand people who've never spoken in their life and relaxed them in a minute and a half so that they were okay.
00:27:11.160 --> 00:27:12.440
They were ready to throw up.
00:27:12.519 --> 00:27:15.880
And a minute and a half later, they were like, I can do this.
00:27:16.279 --> 00:27:25.720
So it's like when you discover you can relax yourself, it's incredibly empowering that it's in your control because a lot of people don't, most people don't even know it's in their control.
00:27:26.120 --> 00:27:36.759
And then some you have some key insights that not everybody's thinking about you anywhere near as much as you think they are, they're thinking about themselves.
00:27:37.000 --> 00:27:39.720
So don't get engaged in that.
00:27:39.960 --> 00:27:44.279
That's critical to just understanding.
00:27:44.360 --> 00:27:51.800
And there's key insights, and I talk about half a dozen of them in my book and in my lectures, and then dosage, like I talked about.
00:27:52.040 --> 00:27:55.960
And then the other key is everyday action.
00:27:56.200 --> 00:28:01.560
Do something every day towards what you want to achieve, even if it's for five minutes.
00:28:02.120 --> 00:28:10.200
Do one bold thing a day, talk to one stranger a day, do something that people would say you're embarrassed about.
00:28:10.360 --> 00:28:13.640
I'll give you a serious example, okay?
00:28:13.880 --> 00:28:18.920
Because people love this when they realize that this is actually possible.
00:28:19.080 --> 00:28:23.640
One of the things I tell people is that embarrassment is a choice.
00:28:24.440 --> 00:28:27.080
You can choose to be embarrassed or not.
00:28:27.240 --> 00:28:33.320
Now I can tell them that, but I can't think them into a new way of acting.
00:28:33.480 --> 00:28:38.440
So what I did in my boldness workshop, it was a two-day workshop.
00:28:38.600 --> 00:28:44.040
At the end of the first day, I said, All right, anybody who wants to do this with me, I'll do it with you.
00:28:44.680 --> 00:28:53.640
The challenge is we're gonna strip down to our underwear and we're gonna walk a city block wearing an adult diaper.
00:28:54.600 --> 00:29:00.279
And half the class actually did it because I had, you know, I've been teaching them how to think boldly.
00:29:00.840 --> 00:29:07.160
And we walk a city block, like 15 of us walking a whole city block, meeting people.
00:29:07.240 --> 00:29:10.680
It was a mall, you know, like an outside mall that we were walking on.
00:29:10.840 --> 00:29:14.120
We get back, and everybody who didn't do it is like, what was it like?
00:29:14.279 --> 00:29:15.480
How it must have been crazy.
00:29:15.880 --> 00:29:18.759
And they went, you know, it was just not a big deal.
00:29:19.640 --> 00:29:25.800
Because they were deliberately doing something quote, embarrassing.
00:29:26.279 --> 00:29:37.160
And instead of trying to tell them that embarrassment is a choice, I get them to act their way into understanding that you can choose not to be embarrassed.
00:29:37.480 --> 00:29:38.040
Right.
00:29:38.279 --> 00:29:39.880
So it's that sort of thing.
00:29:39.960 --> 00:29:46.759
It's like you make a choice to say, I'm gonna do something that's gonna make me uncomfortable, then I'm afraid it's how it's gonna go, whatever.
00:29:47.080 --> 00:29:53.000
But there's no real negative consequences, except psychologically.
00:29:57.080 --> 00:30:10.120
What I'm hearing is you're almost having this group retrain their nervous system because the nervous system and the mind has all these huge consequences of stepping up and being bold.
00:30:10.200 --> 00:30:20.279
And is that your way of saying you have the control to retrain your nervous system, your mind, and also to choose what that output means?
00:30:20.440 --> 00:30:23.800
Is it embarrassing or was it just a fun experience?
00:30:24.120 --> 00:30:24.600
Yeah.
00:30:24.840 --> 00:30:27.480
Let's take it all the way to being an entrepreneur.
00:30:27.640 --> 00:30:40.840
You run this business, you take a shot at it two, three years, and it's just like the marketplace just doesn't care, or the timing's just not right, or you run out of money completely before you get traction.
00:30:42.279 --> 00:30:44.440
The business was a failure.
00:30:44.680 --> 00:30:46.440
You're not a failure.
00:30:46.680 --> 00:30:48.360
That's the difference.
00:30:48.600 --> 00:30:56.120
And when you come away and you say, I don't have to label myself as a failure, I have failures.
00:30:56.759 --> 00:30:59.480
It's 180 degrees different.
00:30:59.720 --> 00:31:08.279
And what happens is for me, I have had some pretty significant failures along the way.
00:31:09.160 --> 00:31:23.560
And because of it, I keep moving up in the risks I'm comfortable taking because I went like, wow, I fell pretty hard back then, and I found my way back, and I'm actually in a better place.
00:32:36.280 --> 00:32:43.640
So the cycle of success and failure on the way up is just a process for me.
00:32:43.720 --> 00:32:48.840
It is not something to be afraid of anymore, and my stress level goes way down.
00:32:49.320 --> 00:32:57.720
There were times when I was$100,000 from the business losing all of its credit at one point.
00:32:58.760 --> 00:33:03.480
And I said, I have figured out my way out of stuff.
00:33:03.560 --> 00:33:05.800
And if I don't, I don't.
00:33:06.360 --> 00:33:14.440
It's not that I am a failure, it's that I failed on trying, on taking a big swing.
00:33:15.400 --> 00:33:26.520
Because otherwise, you live a life of quiet desperation, of mediocrity, and you get to the finish line, and all you got is a stack of regrets.
00:33:27.000 --> 00:33:34.200
I'm not gonna have many regrets because I've tried so much.
00:33:35.240 --> 00:33:37.960
Are there gonna be things I wish I did differently?
00:33:38.120 --> 00:33:39.240
Oh, yeah.
00:33:39.880 --> 00:33:43.400
But next time that won't be the case.
00:33:43.640 --> 00:33:45.080
I will be wiser.
00:33:48.520 --> 00:33:53.000
It sounds like boldness is another metaphor for just keep trying.
00:33:53.800 --> 00:33:57.160
Go for it, keep trying, and then let's see what happens.
00:33:57.320 --> 00:33:58.040
Let's go there.
00:33:59.000 --> 00:34:05.080
Yeah, it's it is, it's really become somebody who says yes, okay.
00:34:05.560 --> 00:34:09.559
Step up, speak up, say, yeah, I'll try that.
00:34:09.880 --> 00:34:11.400
Yeah, that scares me.
00:34:11.639 --> 00:34:12.679
Sign me up.
00:34:13.880 --> 00:34:15.079
That's the difference.
00:34:15.240 --> 00:34:18.840
Instead of saying, Oh no, no, I hate public speaking.
00:34:19.240 --> 00:34:23.720
There's all these speakers, none of them are dropping dead on stage, okay?
00:34:23.880 --> 00:34:26.519
That's not happening, it's not killing them.
00:34:26.760 --> 00:34:28.280
They learn to do it.
00:34:28.920 --> 00:34:32.679
Many of them, like me, were not comfortable.
00:34:33.079 --> 00:34:39.720
My shirt would be drenched in my first five or ten lectures because I was so anxious.
00:34:40.200 --> 00:34:41.880
But I got better.
00:34:42.039 --> 00:34:44.360
I get better and better, and I'm still getting better.
00:34:44.519 --> 00:34:51.320
I'll probably be 20 or 30 percent better by next year, because I'm trying new stuff.
00:34:51.559 --> 00:34:59.480
It takes boldness to ask for feedback, critique, like tell me what I'm doing wrong.
00:34:59.720 --> 00:35:08.200
Because success feels great, all the learning happens from the feedback and the criticism and the failures.
00:35:09.079 --> 00:35:13.400
So if you want to be a lifelong learner, that's the deal.
00:35:13.720 --> 00:35:19.800
Lifelong learning doesn't mean an unbroken stream of successes, it means the opposite.
00:35:20.439 --> 00:35:24.279
So it sounds like failures, consequences, results.
00:35:24.599 --> 00:35:35.159
Whatever happens with these three lanes, if you will, pale in comparison to regret at the end of the journey if there's just been stagnation.
00:35:35.319 --> 00:35:36.599
Is that a fair point?
00:35:37.480 --> 00:35:40.119
Life is short, is the reality.
00:35:40.439 --> 00:35:41.960
We're in the game of life.
00:35:42.119 --> 00:35:45.960
Why wouldn't you want to be on the court instead of the sidelines?
00:35:46.759 --> 00:35:50.359
Because you don't know how long the coach is gonna let you play.
00:35:50.919 --> 00:35:58.759
Unlike the real games, the coaches put you in the game, play, get off the bench.
00:35:59.159 --> 00:36:01.960
The coach isn't never benching you.
00:36:02.359 --> 00:36:10.919
It's a metaphor for God or the universe or whatever your faith is, but the coach has put you in and will never bench you.
00:36:11.079 --> 00:36:24.279
You will bench yourself, and the coach will grieve that, but he's letting you, she's letting you, whatever that entity is that you find faith and support from.
00:36:25.879 --> 00:36:33.639
But there is also a clock that's been set for how long you're gonna get to play, and you don't know what it is.
00:36:33.719 --> 00:36:39.159
It's not 60 minutes, it's not 90 minutes, you don't know.
00:36:39.479 --> 00:37:06.679
So you want to leave it all on the court, you want to leave it all on the mat, you want to leave it all on the pitch because it will be uh, you know, I've lost enough friends over the years where where death is a reality, it's not this something in the future, and so I want to give it everything, I want to be thoroughly depleted on my last day.
00:37:06.839 --> 00:37:22.119
I want to have tried everything crazy that I could come up with, and hopefully had a significant impact on people and lived a purposeful life, a life of leaning, yeah.
00:37:23.079 --> 00:37:25.319
Some would say a purpose-driven life.
00:37:26.439 --> 00:37:53.719
Yeah, what I love so much about this share, Fred, is oftentimes we talk about the opposite, where uh you're 80 years old, in that rocking chair, 90 years old in that rocking chair, beyond that, and then there's this moment when you go, if I'd been bold this whole time, life would have turned out differently.
00:37:54.279 --> 00:37:58.839
Does that sort of sentiment govern why you do the work that you do?
00:37:59.719 --> 00:38:09.319
I think you need there's a great term that I've learned from Daniel Pink, that fabulous author, who's written so many great books.
00:38:09.959 --> 00:38:14.039
He puts out the idea of anticipated regret.
00:38:14.999 --> 00:38:29.319
When you're struggling to whether you should try this or not, take a few minutes and think about how much you'll regret not doing it next year, five years from now, 10 years from now.
00:38:30.359 --> 00:38:42.279
Let that be the motivation to take the risk, to be uncomfortable, to try that difficult thing, to step up rather than step back.
00:38:42.599 --> 00:38:50.439
Every successful entrepreneur I know is a person who steps up when other people would step back.
00:38:50.599 --> 00:38:53.319
Other person might say, I don't think this is gonna work.
00:38:53.479 --> 00:38:55.399
I got to find some security.
00:38:55.799 --> 00:39:03.079
The bold person says, I'm gonna let them try to take me down, but I'm gonna wake up today and keep swinging.
00:39:03.399 --> 00:39:10.359
And those are the guys that succeed, they create extraordinary businesses, usually after three failures.
00:39:10.759 --> 00:39:14.999
They go, Wow, that failure, look at the information from this.
00:39:15.959 --> 00:39:27.079
You can grieve it, you gotta give yourself time to grieve that thing that didn't go right, but don't indulge it, don't embrace it, and don't turn it into self-definition.
00:39:27.639 --> 00:39:31.799
Don't let it define you, let it refine you.
00:39:34.599 --> 00:39:35.239
Love that.
00:39:35.399 --> 00:39:38.039
Don't let it define you, let it refine you.
00:39:38.279 --> 00:39:53.959
And you mentioned earlier that boldness is when you say yes to things, and someone else that says this, say yes to the thing, if I can say that, and then figure out how to do it by the time that time comes around.
00:39:54.199 --> 00:39:57.399
I paraphrase, of course, is Sir Richard Branson.
00:39:57.959 --> 00:40:00.599
I've heard the story a couple of times.
00:40:00.839 --> 00:40:04.039
I could hear the story a bunch more times.
00:40:04.279 --> 00:40:09.239
Let's hear the story about how you beat Sir Richard Branson at chess.
00:40:09.559 --> 00:40:11.239
Yes, he loves playing chess.
00:40:11.479 --> 00:40:15.079
And so I was on Necker Island, one of the islands he owns.
00:40:15.239 --> 00:40:20.839
I was there with a group of business people, and the playing tennis, I ruptured my Achilles tendon.
00:40:21.079 --> 00:40:23.879
So I'm just sitting there watching people play.
00:40:24.039 --> 00:40:31.239
And Richard, who just happened to be on the island, not always there, he doesn't live on the island, but sometimes he bounces in to meet people.
00:40:31.399 --> 00:40:37.959
He hears what happened to me, and he comes up to me and he says, Oh, this is such a bother that this has happened to you.
00:40:38.279 --> 00:40:39.719
Do you play chess?
00:40:39.959 --> 00:40:43.719
Now, the correct answer is, I haven't played chess in 40 years.
00:40:43.959 --> 00:40:46.839
So I'm thinking, oh, he's gonna beat me in five moves.
00:40:47.159 --> 00:40:48.359
He's gonna think I'm an idiot.
00:40:48.439 --> 00:40:50.919
He's gonna wonder why the heck I said I could play chess.
00:40:50.999 --> 00:40:52.519
It's gonna be embarrassing.
00:40:52.839 --> 00:40:55.159
But I said, Yeah, I play chess.
00:40:55.559 --> 00:41:00.119
And so he had somebody bring a chessboard over and we sit and we play.
00:41:00.359 --> 00:41:09.479
And I'm playing such a disorienting game because I'm remembering how to play literally as I play, that I have all these open defenses.
00:41:09.639 --> 00:41:16.919
So he's on attack mode, and I see this move and I just make it and I say, uh, Richard, that's check.
00:41:17.079 --> 00:41:18.519
Actually, it's checkmate.
00:41:18.679 --> 00:41:27.479
And he looks down at the board in shock, and he looks up at me and he calls me a nasty name and sets the board up again immediately to play.
00:41:28.279 --> 00:41:31.639
But the thing is, we had normal conversations.
00:41:31.719 --> 00:41:33.559
I talked to him like a regular person.
00:41:33.719 --> 00:41:38.599
I didn't interview him or ask for business advice or, God forbid, an investment.
00:41:38.759 --> 00:41:40.999
He doesn't need, he's a billionaire, he doesn't need that.
00:41:41.239 --> 00:41:49.959
I know how, because of all my experience being bold and treating everyone as an equal, that I treated him like a regular person.
00:41:50.199 --> 00:42:00.439
For the rest of the week, he came looking for me to play chess again because he enjoyed our conversations as well as beating me, because he beat me every other time.
00:42:00.679 --> 00:42:03.719
Because he's a very competitive person, which is fabulous.
00:42:04.039 --> 00:42:08.759
But we just had these wonderful interactions, and other people were complaining.
00:42:08.839 --> 00:42:12.199
They're going, like, oh, you're you're monopolizing Richard.
00:42:12.839 --> 00:42:14.199
Well, I want to talk to him too.
00:42:14.359 --> 00:42:20.839
I went like, he's asking me to sit across from him at dinner so we can keep you guys off him.
00:42:21.959 --> 00:42:27.559
So, but the whole point is, you need to seize the moments.
00:42:27.719 --> 00:42:29.879
There are times when you need to say yes.
00:42:30.199 --> 00:42:32.519
Imagine if I said no.
00:42:34.279 --> 00:42:35.479
Oh, I don't play chess.
00:42:35.639 --> 00:42:37.719
He would have said, Oh, well, that's too bad.
00:42:37.799 --> 00:42:39.159
I hope you get better.
00:42:39.479 --> 00:42:44.599
What a regret that would have been compared to what I got out of it.
00:42:44.679 --> 00:42:50.119
Because I've run into him a couple more times since at events, and I said, I look forward to playing chess again with you.
00:42:50.199 --> 00:42:51.799
And he goes, How about right now?
00:42:52.119 --> 00:42:54.359
And he makes somebody find a chess board.
00:42:54.679 --> 00:42:58.599
The point is, you don't have all the time in the world.
00:42:58.759 --> 00:43:00.999
It's Carpe Diem, seize the day.
00:43:01.239 --> 00:43:06.039
Most opportunities you don't have all day, you have to seize the moments.
00:43:06.359 --> 00:43:10.999
I had one second to say yes or no to Sir Richard.
00:43:13.719 --> 00:43:16.919
What a regret or what an amazing result.
00:43:19.079 --> 00:43:21.159
That is such an outstanding story.
00:43:21.399 --> 00:43:33.159
And to finish up, if you could challenge every listener to one act of boldness in the next 72 hours, you can edit the time if you want.
00:43:33.319 --> 00:43:34.119
What would that be?
00:43:34.279 --> 00:43:35.719
One act of boldness.
00:43:36.119 --> 00:43:39.079
Okay, so we talked about talking to strangers.
00:43:39.319 --> 00:43:48.039
I want you to do something that deliberately makes you uncomfortable, where there are no negative consequences except in your head.
00:43:48.279 --> 00:43:58.119
One of the exercises, and you can do this anywhere, is if you see a sign on the door that says employees only, go in.
00:43:59.319 --> 00:44:06.679
And listen to the voice in your head that says, Oh, you can't go in there, they're gonna just kick me out, they're gonna be this like you're going in to get kicked out.
00:44:07.719 --> 00:44:09.479
But you know what'll happen?
00:44:09.719 --> 00:44:12.359
Nothing, nobody will say anything.
00:44:12.519 --> 00:44:15.159
The only thing keeping you out is the sign on the door.
00:44:15.319 --> 00:44:25.399
If it's unlocked, go in and realize that nobody's gonna beat you to death, nobody's gonna arrest you.
00:44:25.879 --> 00:44:29.319
They might say, excuse me, this is for employees only.
00:44:29.399 --> 00:44:30.999
And I have the response to that.
00:44:31.159 --> 00:44:34.119
You say, Well, I am an employee, just not here.
00:44:34.839 --> 00:44:41.479
And they will look at you like you're an idiot, but you're doing a boldness exercise aiming for failure.
00:44:41.799 --> 00:44:44.359
So if they get kicked out, you won.
00:44:45.159 --> 00:44:48.919
And you were trying to be an idiot, so you can't be embarrassed about it.
00:44:49.079 --> 00:44:55.159
You were deliberately doing something that should go wrong, but there are no negative consequences.
00:44:55.319 --> 00:45:00.519
So do that in the next two days, find a door and go in.
00:45:02.519 --> 00:45:08.759
Fred, it's been so outstanding having you here as a guest on Purpose Driven Success Podcast.
00:45:08.999 --> 00:45:12.439
If someone wants to learn more from you, where do we send them?
00:45:12.759 --> 00:45:15.799
Easiest place is fredjoyle.com.
00:45:15.959 --> 00:45:18.999
My last name is spelled like Royal, J-O-Y-A-L.
00:45:19.399 --> 00:45:20.999
But you can learn a lot about me.
00:45:21.079 --> 00:45:24.999
I'm Fred Joyle on everything LinkedIn, Facebook, Instagram.
00:45:25.719 --> 00:45:36.199
You can also book a half hour with me right on my website and we can have a conversation, see you know how I can impact your life or your team or your business.
00:45:37.399 --> 00:45:39.479
Fred, it's been absolutely awesome.
00:45:39.639 --> 00:45:41.479
Have an amazing rest of today.
00:45:41.719 --> 00:45:42.439
I sure will.
00:45:42.519 --> 00:45:43.079
Thanks, Mo.
00:45:43.319 --> 00:45:44.519
Great to see you.
00:45:45.079 --> 00:45:48.279
Thank you for listening to Purpose Driven Success with Mo Salami.
00:45:48.679 --> 00:45:52.599
If you enjoyed this episode, please subscribe and leave a review.
00:45:52.759 --> 00:45:55.799
It's one of the best ways to help others discover the show.
00:45:56.039 --> 00:46:00.119
You can find links and resources and show notes at our website.
00:46:00.279 --> 00:46:06.999
And if today's episode inspired you, check out one of our other insight-filled, value-packed episodes.
00:46:07.159 --> 00:46:14.599
Next week we'll have another amazing guest, so stay tuned for even more real stories and actionable insights.
00:46:14.839 --> 00:46:23.479
Work on your mindset, work on your skill set, and always move in the direction of the result you want before you see the result you want.
00:46:23.559 --> 00:46:27.079
And until next time, do the best you can consistently.
00:46:27.399 --> 00:46:28.199
Ciao.
