Bright & Beautiful Comets! Navigating Polyamory's Intermittent Relationships

Welcome to the Poly Pathways podcast, helping you create paths for practical polyamory. Your hosts are Cat and Doc. We're glad you're here. Welcome back Poly Pathways podcast listeners. Today we are diving into a shorter episode about comment relationships. So connections that come and go, sometimes marked by long periods of time apart or passionate reunions. Usually, comets come with a little bit of extra spark, but they can also be long-distance relationships. Obviously, they are called comets because they are inspired by celestial comets. So they are very intense. They come around once in a while, and they are intermating connections that you have. Comments are often synonymous with long-distance relationships because you don't have the opportunity to spend as much time with those people, but they don't necessarily have to be one in the same. partners generally experience significant intervals of separation, yet the bond still remains meaningful and fulfilling. These are very independent relationships. There's usually not a codependency angle to these relationships, nor is there really a lot of monotonous flair to these relationships. They're pretty much additional people that we have in our orbit that are very exciting to have there, but they tend to not usually morph into something bigger unless situation calls These relationships require clear communication, mutual understanding, and definitely a focus on the unique dynamics of it. I recently kind of evolved my understanding of comments into two different varieties. One is that long-distance relationship of somebody that you talk to regularly or somewhat regularly, but they can live across the world, across the country, whatever that may be. They can even live in the same town, but they're just not as readily available as someone else. Those I consider comments, but my good friend Doc here introduced me to her meteor as well. In traditional monogamous dating, a meteor might be something that you have a one-night stand with. So it's a once kind of a one-and-done connection. You might need somebody at a music festival or when you're out in business travel and you spy them across the bar. It's more of an intense one-off connection that may or may not have any lasting side effects. I still consider those people comments because they came in, they burned brightly, and then they exited. whether or not they come back in our life. But I think this is kind of an important distinction to me as I have someone I consider a comet that lives several states away. We talk regularly and they are someone I've trusted my life. There's someone I consider part of my friend group and part of my inner circle. Obviously, we have talked on this podcast before together, but the relationship I have with her is a little bit different than the relationship I would have with somebody I met at a music festival, for instance. I may or may not continue having conversations with that person once they exit my orbit, but I would still consider them a comet. And Doc, I think you also have your own comets that hang around in your orbit. Yeah. So the long distance aspect of comets, I think, is what traditionally we understand. But there's also sort of this inner solar system type of comet, this idea of a local comet. And I have a local comet who's in and out of, in and out of my life in wonderful ways. We may talk like for several days in a row. We may not talk for several weeks in a time. But every time this person comes back into my life, it's an exciting. It has that comet level energy. It's exciting to see this person. We enjoy our time together. It's like the conversation never stopped. We just kind of pick it back up and keep on going. This is someone who I've known for several years and it's just around, but lives locally to me. And so it's somebody that I met on kind of the local scene and we connected and clicked and we had some early heat in our relationship. And then that kind of waned. And then it, then it, you know, and that's just kind of how comets go, right? It's really hot and bright for a minute. And then it's really cool and distant but still there and present in your life. And then they come back around. And so we are talking about comments in terms of, yes, long distance. But I think it's important to look at your pollucal and your community and say, do I have local comets here? People who might be kind of escalating into that comet level role, but as local person. Yeah, I think this comes up a lot if you're active in the kink or the BDSM space because a local comet may be a play partner that you only play with at events, right? You don't necessarily a relationship with them outside of those events and outside of those events. at space. But, you know, if you go to the same events twice a year and you're at a big BDSM thing or a Kink event together, that might be your local comment where you always play together in those scenarios. I think that also consider a local comment. You don't have a relationship outside of those spaces. Right. Absolutely. And I think that I think that that's a big part of what we're talking about here is how do we interact with these comments? What's fair to us? What's that might be more, might have an anchor partner or might have more frequent people in it, you know, what is fair within all of those things? And that's really what we're going to talk about in the next segment, which is establishing those kind of clear agreements for you and for your partner. Enjoying today's episode, be sure to share it with your molecule or anyone curious about ethical non-monogamy. And if you're juggling a busy polyamorous life and could use a little help with day-to-day tasks, check out Magic AI. Magic AI connects you with virtual assistance to make your life easier. Visit our referral link in the show notes and get up to $2,000 in free support. See how they can help you create more time for what matters. Let's talk about those agreements. I think this is a really important topic. I recently had to revisit my comment agreements with my partner. So this is super timely for me. And the most important part about agreements is, again, they're agreements and their boundaries. They're not rules. They're not permission slips. They're not things like that. But I think as somebody with established partners, it is really important for me to define what's comfortable during my times apart and together within the polycule and making sure everybody has that understanding. The most important part about this is to do it before the event, the trip, the, you know, if you're going off to run fair and you go to this big run fair every year and you know there might be some people there that you want to get spicy with, it's important to have these conversations proactively ahead of heading. into a situation where there might be a comet. So if you travel, I travel a lot for work. My time to talk about this would be before I go on a work trip, whether or not I think anything is going to happen. It's good to just have those boundaries established ahead of time. So you're not in a reactive position where you're in the moment or you're in the scene or you're in a situation and you're trying to not hit the panic button and text your partner and kind of catch them off guard because then it's a very short amount of time where they have to make a decision. Likewise, if you're in a relationship that might be struggling or you might be struggling a little bit with things like self abandonment, looking at those agreements or revisiting those agreements at those times helps you to avoid things like self abandonment and making bad choices for yourself. Yeah, absolutely. So I love talking about, you know, is there a messy list? A messy list is somebody, it's an agreed upon list of like these are the people we would never pursue. And for a lot of. lot of people, like we're going to go back to the business travel example, people you work with might be on your messy list because you work with them. You see them all the time. And anything that does or not does not happen has the potential to impact that relationship. It has the impact on your livelihood, which will affect your molecule at large. Friends that you previously had, X's sometimes fall on a messy list. The messy list is an example of an agreement where you have to both agree that somebody's on a messy list, not a partner to. telling the other partner, hey, you can never hang out with your ex. But I think that's one of the agreements that is kind of important. If you have some people on a messy list, make sure that's part of this in case you're in a situation where you might see them. I've heard about that in situations where people are going home to visit their parents or something and they might run into their high school ex. That person could be a comment if they're not on an agreement for a messy list. Or at least a meteor, right? Yeah, exactly. So being proactive about those situations and not to overthink it, but overthinking the scenarios of what could happen are really important. I really appreciate that the concept of the messy list because that's not anything that I really thought about before talking with you about this episode. And I really do like that idea of the messy list because I think that that for a lot of people resonates with, yeah, you know, I don't know maybe with that person or, you know, it's been a long time or, you know, I just, I love the idea of the messy list. and creating it in a space that is mutual so that everybody has this kind, I think we can agree that everybody has this kind of messy list of people in their heads. And being able to understand and appreciate that of yourself and of your partner is important. So I'm really appreciative of the messy list part of this. I had forgotten about the messy list concept until I was on a recent work trip. And one of the people I work with is polyamorous. we talk about boundaries and relationships a lot and they reminded me of the concept of the messy list because they said the the age of a phrase you don't shit where you eat of which I can say that because we're going to we have an explicit label already but that concept of like you don't want to have relationships with people that are going to mess up they're not going to mess up your life or basically like blow it up in smoke and it reminded me that okay in terms of comments and situations where you might see those people that's a good agreement to have like if somebody is on your messy list, they're always no. The other agreements that came up during my discussion, which I'm being very vulnerable in sharing what my partners and I've agreed on, is safety is always first for me. It's always top of mind. You have to have that trust with your partners that if they are involved in these one-off comment relationships and media relationships, that they're still taking your safety into account in mind. So whether that's an agreement on testing, boundaries, things like that, it's really good to hash that out ahead of time, what the expectations are and what the, I would say, policies and procedures are for following up with that. So, you know, if you run off to Las Vegas and have group sex on a stage with a bunch of people and they're all comments to you now, what is your testing responsibly when you come back? I also see situational rules come into play and not rules, agreements, right? So in monogamous culture, you have this concept of a hall pass. There's people you have a hall pass for. Usually it's a celebrity list or whatever. or their situations. So in some examples would be military families. So if I'm deployed for a year and a half, you have a hall pass to have a relationship with someone else. Or you're going to go to a conference in Spain and you have the ability to hook up with somebody when you're there. That's the concept of a hall pass. I would say this doesn't really apply conceptually in polyamorous relationships because we're open to new connections by the nature of being poly. But it's an interesting thought. Like in these scenarios, what are the agreements? So if it's situational where, you know, you're going to be doing something regularly, sometimes that can come up. I do like to say to avoid the heads-up rule. So I read from someone on Reddit in this conversation thread that I'll just quote it out here. It says, we are very clear on me. We discuss first before things happen instead of after. We, me and my husband, go into a date with someone new saying, I will not be having sex tonight or there is a chance we might have sex tonight. And I understand what they're going for here, but I feel like that's unfairly burdened and burdening the other partner to be thinking about that. So if I were to text my partner and be like, hey, there's someone at this party that I'm into, I don't know where it's going to go. It could turn into sex. They are now thinking about that and have the emotional burden and mental burden of dealing with that for the rest of the night until I check in again and say one way or the other. That fact actually led to me kind of having a don't ask, don't tell policy around comments of meteors that are one-off. Obviously, my long-term comment is a little bit different. But the conversation was, if they're not going to come into our lives regularly and they're not going to be a regular fixture in your life, why would I need to know about it? And that kind of sat interestingly with me because I'm a very open and transparent person. And I'm like, well, I would want to tell you. And they're like, but there's no value to me in knowing. Why do I need to know that? And I think that was really important because it was more of me trying to offload some of the emotional load to them versus them actually needing that information. So that could be smart use of don't ask, don't tell, whereas normally I kind of lean away from that policy. That leaves the control with your partner of what they're able to deal with at this time or what's really interesting to them. They may value your relationship way beyond your periodic connections with people. And so it just doesn't really matter to them. But it gives them the ability to know. And that's often, that's a messy list in and of itself. Within a relationship is to what do I want to know, what don't I want to know? And being able to have that conversation beyond just comments to everything, I think, is important in making it safe for both partners to be able to be transparent and honest and comfortable in doing so. they weren't going to invite the ire of comets, I guess. What agreements do you have with your comments or what agreements do you have with your partners around introducing new comments, right? The agreement that I have is that when people kind of enter into the scene, we talk a little bit about that, hey, I'm talking to this person. Beyond that, until things start to get serious, it doesn't need to be much of a conversation. It's just generally nice to know kind of what's going on. I would agree with that, actually. And that's kind of where I draw the line is like I feel like my partners need to be informed if this person is going to be a regular fixture. Like if I feel like it's approaching there, I've always been like, hey, I'm talking to this person. But in a comment situation, I'm surprised now to find myself saying, well, they're not going to be a regular fixture. And I'm not going to be integrated into our lives. So is it valuable to share this? And my partner has basically said no. We just know. But also allowing them to know, like to change their mind to say, okay, somebody news on the scene, what do you want to know about this? I think is important too. Because I think within that, even within your anchor relationships, I think you're also get the benefit of having your partner be able to say, hey, is this the right time for that for you? Like, I'm seeing things that you don't necessarily see. You're burning the candle at both ends. You might be saturated. We've got a lot of family things coming up or you have a big project at work. coming up, like, is this the best time for you to have that bit of distractions? Apropos of nothing. It's so. I'm just straight up attacking me. Oh, my gosh. I mean, all fair. It's all fair. And I think it's fair for me, too. I mean, like, recently I've come to rely on my partner to remind me, you know, you're, you're a very sick person. You're going through a significant change in your life in a couple different areas. You've had a very, you've had major losses. And, you know, is, you know, not around comments, but around, like, around work things and around commitment things and, you know, make sure to give yourself the right, the right space to do things. So I think being able to kind of go back to your partner and say, hey, I'm thinking about this or I want this to be the case. The other thing I think within that agreement is that we allow for those to be supportive. So we usually start with, do you have space for something like this and or even identifying this potentially could this potentially trigger some. feeling so I want to make sure that we have the room to discuss it. But making it safe for your partner to be able to say, hey, I've met this person. This is really interesting to me. I want to see where this goes. I think it is important and be able to be consistent there so that, you know, you know when you go to your partner about somebody new that maybe they're excited in the beginning. And they're like, oh, that's awesome. And cat, that's so great. And then three days later, they're like, hey, as it turns out, I was, I was just caught up in the moment. and now I hate this and I hate everything about it and you've already made commitments to this other person. So I think even within that is like to understand maybe the nature of the relationship. Like do you need to give things like three to 22 days for your partner to figure out what's going on? But you'll know within your relationship. But I think also one of the agreements you have to have is with your comment in general. Like what is your availability and commitment to this person? Not only what is on and off the table, but also what are emotional commitment. So very early when I was, when I was dating, I had a really interesting interaction with somebody who was like, hey, I see that you're Demi. And what does that mean for you? Because I have a long distance partner. I have an anchor partner and I have kind of a regional person that I see. I'm looking for basically a no, like kind of a friends with benefit situation, no romantic feelings. That's, that's letting me know what they're emotionally available to. And I, and I'm appreciative of that comment. And that, even with my local person that I see on a routine basis and routine sounds like there's a schedule, there's not. But. Regular, regular. A regular basis, frequently enough that I am very excited to see this person when we're able to. But there's also those talks about kind of emotional availability between the two of us. Like, definitely there's definitely a lot of big caring vibes and things like that. But I'm not the anchor partner. She's not the anchor partner. What's the commitment there? Like, do we let you know about big things ahead of time or afterwards, which is okay with you? Those types of things are important. But also to let your comment know, like, what's okay and not okay? So within this relationship, maybe kink is part of your dynamic with an anchor partner. but that doesn't want to be something that's available to your comet. Or maybe vice versa. Maybe your anchor partner just isn't hitting some of those kink interests that you have and your comment is. So making sure that you're clear about both your emotional and your physical availability to that person. But I also think that it's a, I think communication is an important part of that. And I think with comments, that can get a little bit tricky. Yeah. I think it's definitely easier to communicate with people who you see regularly in your orbit. So you have to do it kind of one and two ways. You have to establish a cadence like, hey, if you don't hear from me every day, it's not because I'm not thinking about you. It's not because I don't want to communicate, but I'm only going to reach out to you every once in a while. One thing that I really love about my ongoing comment is that we transferred our communication to a platform where I'm reminded daily to check in with the person. So I use Snapchat. And if you use Snapchat, you know, you have streaks, right? So I know that I'm regularly touching days with that person. So I know that I'm regularly touching days with that person. It doesn't have to be deep. It doesn't have to be crazy. But it helps me feel more connected to her. I feel more connected to her because I don't feel like I'm losing large pieces of time in between seeing the person. Whereas a comet I might meet out at a show or a music festival or something like that, I might only talk to that person once every couple of months or maybe only during music festival season. So maybe I'm only going to see them once you're at this music festival. We might communicate the month before or the month after. I think it's important to have those communication conversations, maybe not in so many words because the relationship's a bit lighter than an anchor partner or something like that, but just saying like, hey, how often do you expect to hear from me? Like, is this, is this like going to be an ongoing thing? Like, is this something we're going to talk about regularly? Are you okay with me reaching out? Like, are you okay with me setting memes? Like, what's your communication style? It's just kind of feel the other person out because there's very much a group of people who it's going to feel more. more like that meteor, more like that one-night stand where they don't really want to talk about it unless they're going to hook up. And you're going to have to decide if that's okay with you or not, or if you need something deeper. And if you're someone like me that likes to go all in on relationships, you might have to reframe your brain on whether you emotionally can handle somebody, if you can handle somebody kind of having a lower level of communication that you're used to, to call myself out, I would say that my ex-girlfriend, who I can still talk to at any time, our level of communication. Our level of was not in line with what I thought our relationship should be. And I think that kind of took me a while to navigate. I'm now more comfortable with it. But at the time, I was like, I wanted to talk to them more, but I didn't feel like our communication was there. So that's one thing that I think comes up a lot in common situations. And I also think it's important to watch the communication with your comments within your pollicule as well. So if they are a comment and you're coming into town or you're going to be near where they are and you're like hey next month i'm going to be in town do you want to connect that's like that's one thing but when it becomes a daily hourly very frequent type of communication that's where you need to be a little bit more careful i think both with your well with your comet with yourself and with your pollicule to be able to you know again does it contribute to saturation you know hey you know hey doc you seem to be talking to this person you don't see a lot a lot. Yeah. Like, you know, what's, what's going on? Like, are, you know, is there a change in that relationship? Is there something happening? And being able to ask that as a partner to be able to say, to feel comfortable saying, hey, I've noticed something is different. And what's, what's going on? But also be able to communicate back to your partner or your comment. Like, hey, like, I've loved our chats. We got to push back a little bit. I've got a lot going on with the public. I've got a lot going on at work or whatever it might be and just be able to throttle that communication back when it gets to be too much. Because, and we'll talk about this in the next segment, there is an aspect of not seeing each other that has a fairly romantic and magical component to it. Yeah, I would say that's what makes a comment, right, is that there is an infrequency to it. Whether you talk a lot and only see each other rarely or vice versa, right? You see each other regularly that you don't talk a lot in between. That is what makes a comet a comet. So if you find yourself starting to veer into more of a relationship standard or a more established partner than a comet, that's okay. Recognize that. Realize that. And then determine with yourself and with your partners if you need to change how you're referring to that agreement and if things need to change as a relationship structure. Because then you start to get into how they're going to entangle into your life in other ways. But it's all about managing realistic expectations, which we're going to talk about after the next break. Thanks for listening to the episode so far. Let's talk about something that's been a lifesaver in the middle of this beautiful, busy, polyamory life. And that is staying hydrated and energized. Let's be real. Between managing multiple relationships, keeping up with work, parenting, and just squeezing in a little bit of self-care, it's easy to forget the basics, like drinking enough and staying hydrated. And that's where drink element comes in. 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Trust me what I tell you, the staying hydrated should not be another thing to stress out about in this whirlwind of polyamory. Drink element makes that easy. Thank you for listening to the podcast. Now let's get back to the episode. Managing realistic expectations for your cons, right? We talked a little bit about the communication, the transparency, the boundaries, all that good stuff. I want you to pause for a minute and kind of understand your why, right? Why is a covenant relationship in line with your lifestyle? Maybe it is you are saturated. So I know we always talk about don't add to your saturation point. right. But maybe you're missing a little bit of spark or you've been in multiple long-term relationships. Not to put anybody on the spot, I was talking with another polyamorous person the other day and they said that they missed the spark, right? They missed the new relationship energy that they have from relationships. And I thought about that a little bit. And if you've been in a lot of long-term relationships, so I've been with my partners, you know, over a decade and four years on the other one, sometimes things feel will routine. And for me, this is not true of everybody. This is not universal advice, right? I did have a situation where I was attracted to someone else and I felt that spark with that person. It did not turn into anything. But I felt that spark and I carried it back to my other relationships. Again, not condoning this as a way of doing it, but understand why a comment relationship makes sense. Maybe you don't have capacity for a whole other relationship. But there's something another person can offer you that, you know, would make you feel good or make you feel whole or something like that. We're complex human creatures. There is going to be a why for you on why this seems like the right place, the right time, or the right human, right? Maybe you weren't planning on any of this. And somebody just showed up and you're like, I really want to explore this connection with this person. That is perfectly valid, right? It could just be a situational thing. So kind of step back and examine your why when you're going through these agreements because that will help you color what your expectations are for comment relationships. Yeah, I think that that's really important to understand not only I think your personal why, but also asking that of your comment. Like why? So you, you're not walking into a situation that is terrible. Like, oh, yeah, I want to comment because I'm occasionally. Yeah, I'm occasionally in town and I want to fool around. Like, that's valid. It's a totally valid reason. but that might not be your reason, your interest level with that person. And I think that's important. But understanding the Y, too, is there's an aspect of it of kind of cautious optimism with comments. I think that long distance relationships, infrequent relationships can often cloud your vision about what that relationship's capacity is and what the capability of that person or that potential partner is. because the time you have together is so brightly burning. Like it's either really fun and exciting and hot and pleasant and joyful because it's basically a vacation. Then you go away. Like you go back to your regular life. You go back to your pollicule, back to your job and your kids and your family and your regular world. And what happens? You start to yearn for those really fun, bright, loving connections that you have with this person and your brain starts to do what brains do, and that is to create the in-between times. They start to create fantasy about, oh, wouldn't it be great if our life could just be together all the time because it would be just like that week we spent together in November. And it does absolutely cloud your vision. It's not that those things aren't possible. They certainly are, if done correctly and done carefully and managed well. But if you get caught up in the romanticism and energy of that infrequent contact or that long-distance contact, you can sometimes overlook the reality that the relationship might have some pretty serious incompatibilities. There might be some sort of undesire undesirability about that person that is like cool if they can tuck it away for a week, but not cool if it's around for like ever. We can deal with a lot of things in short periods of time, but just something to understand about, I think, comment relationships too, is that. that there are aspects that you're not seeing, the part where you're, you know, you're not together. You don't see what's happening on a frequent basis. And that might not be something that's totally pleasant with you. So understand your why and also your reality that you are seeing this person infrequently. You don't have insight into all the different ammishments that you might have with your, with your long-term partners. That's so real. I'm so glad you brought that up because it is true, because the nature of a common relationship is to have less, less frequent communication, understand that you're not going to get the whole picture of that person. You really have to embrace the impermanence of the situation to really get, you know, the joy out of it. But also watch yourself, if you're a person that loves that dopamine, like, and you're constantly chasing that next high, whether you're a thrill seeker or otherwise, it is really tempting to be like, oh my God, we had the best time. I want that again. And to start to consume one of the other agreements that I have is to not consume. family resources to go see my comment, like to not be popping off on a plane every weekend chasing that high. That is very valid that you have to be reasonable with yourself. If you have an addictive personality and you know that you're going to crave that comet all the time because it's the good times that you had, check yourself and realize that there is a level of impermanence there because of the nature of that relationship and that you simply might not know everything about this person. I've read stories on several message boards of people that had a comment something happened. They might have lost their housing. They might have lost their job or something like that. And then they move them across the country and they move in with their family. And then they realized they're like, holy crap, I actually did not know that much about this person. There was a woman in one of my groups who literally moved her boyfriend all the way across the country to move in with her, her husband, and their two kids. And shock of all shop, this dude was super lazy. He was not doing anything. He was making an absolute, ever-loving mess of the house. And, you know, it was just a nightmare for the family. But that's kind of the reality of a common situation is you might not know everything about that person. And the impermanence of it that made it so sexy, that made it so exciting, that made it so wonderful, might not be something you can replicate in every day's life. Of course, there's situations where it's not true. But that's something we always have to kind of check ourselves. Are we seeking the next high? Or is this really something we can reasonably say is a comet situation? Part of embracing that impermanence is also recognizing the time that you do have together and the connection that you can build together, whatever your expectations and agreements are with the comment. But you can absolutely get creative. I think that's the, that's the piece about comets too is like it's not just that you're going to see this person for a week and you're just kind of going to be downtime hanging out watching movies and eating good food. It's that, oh, we're going to go to that there's an art festival in town and there's a, you know, there's a concert. We're going to a music festival. We're going to go, you know, we're going to go to the, we're going to go maintain this connection. Maybe you, maybe like Kat, you have a, you have a Snapchat channel for you and your, for you and your comment so you can have kind of a shared digital space with them. Maybe you have a private meme message board on your discord for that person and that may be what it is or you might just be creating, you know, maybe we watch the show together and then we talk about it later since our schedules are so different. But being able to manage that expectation with your comment and with yourself is important too. But at a ends of the pollicule. If you're like, hey, look, every third Thursday, we, we get together and watch Netflix and, and then just talk for a while. Like, that's, that's cool. Like, you can, you can do that, but you need to let everybody know what that is. And I think that that's also, I think for a comet helps to establish them within your orbit to understand that they are someone who's, that your polycule knows that this is someone who's going to be around. And your comet knows that they're known within your polycule. Visibility is key for some people, wanting to know that they're known in the polycule. But for some people, that's a deal breaker. That partner might say, I don't want the other partners to know about me or something like that. And that's met that person too. Yeah. And that's fair. My final thoughts on this topic is the beauty of polyamory is really your ability to craft the relationships and the connections that makes sense for you. So if it makes sense for you to have a comet and to have somebody that is coming in and out of your life and just adding a little sparkle here and there, that would be great. Like, you have the ability to form relationships and connections. It all comes back to those agreements, the communication, and the transparency. As long as you're all on the same page, there's no reason why you couldn't have 20 comments if you had the space for it in your brain. But I really want to drive home the point that even though we're making these terms and we're explaining these terms and talking about these terms, it really is up to you to define what your relationships are, whether you call them comments or not call them comments. That's up to you. So give yourself a little bit of grace here to call it whatever you want to call it, but understand that it might look different from you, from somebody else, and that's my communication is so important. That's exactly it. We define what looks like for us today. So in six months, this may look really different. And we'll talk a little bit about that. Sharing is caring, and we're all about sharing resources. If you know a company that would loved partner with Poly Pathways, please have them reach out to us at Polypathways podcast at gmail.com. Thanks for listening. If you like the shorter format, if this is something that's interesting to you, let us know, drop a comment, send us a message on socials, or just check out our email, and let us know what you thought. And then what question we might be able to answer in this format as well. But in today's episode, we really talked about the question about what agreements and expectations are there around comets in your life, whether you're an established molecule or you're not? And we talked about what those agreements might look like, what the realities are. And honestly, we did that because there's a lot of joy in comet relationships when they exist. And we talked about how to establish that clarity within the relationship between you and your comet, as well as within the molecule to establish visibility and understanding and care and concern for that person, but also how to keep that connection alive and thriving. If that's what you want, if you want this comment to be around for a while, you're going to need to keep that connection going in a way that makes sense for the both of you. If it's not what you want, then at least you can enjoy what you have while you have it. A couple upcoming episodes, some things that we're going to talk about again in the shorter format, but what about FOMO? Oh my God, I'm missing out and I just have so much fear. And so, We'll talk a little bit about FOMO, but also want to break down a couple of recent conversations around polycule types and whether that's like, how does KTP work, how does lap sitting poly work, how does garden party? And which one is better than the other one? Hint, none of them are. But we're going to talk a little bit about some of the recent conversations around the type of things and being parallel. And of course, we keep mentioning it. What about the children? What about the children? Friends, if you enjoyed the shorter format, let us know, drop a comment. Share this with your Pollucule. Share this with your friends. Make sure you subscribe. And like always, Kat, we'll see them next time. See you next time. Thank you for listening. If you enjoyed this episode, consider subscribing and follow us at Polly Pathways podcast on all the social medias that you enjoy.