WEBVTT
1
00:00:00.600 --> 00:00:04.120
I started drinking in the sixth grade. I remember getting
2
00:00:04.160 --> 00:00:06.360
drunk because I wanted an eighth grade girl to think
3
00:00:06.400 --> 00:00:09.759
I was cool. The strange part is I had completely
4
00:00:09.839 --> 00:00:12.720
forgotten about it for over forty years until I came
5
00:00:12.800 --> 00:00:16.839
back here. And once that memory came back, everything changed.
6
00:00:23.800 --> 00:00:26.280
What if the biggest thing that is stealing your joy
7
00:00:26.399 --> 00:00:30.640
isn't what you think. I didn't realize it until I
8
00:00:30.719 --> 00:00:36.520
discovered another form of kryptonite. This is kryptonite on location. Today,
9
00:00:36.600 --> 00:00:40.719
I'm at Silver Dollar City in Branson, Missouri. People come
10
00:00:40.759 --> 00:00:45.240
here for fun. They come here to make memories, to laugh,
11
00:00:45.359 --> 00:00:50.719
to ride rollercoasters, to watch shows. My family came here
12
00:00:50.759 --> 00:00:55.439
to make memories. Instead, I stumbled onto another form of kryptonite.
13
00:00:56.280 --> 00:00:58.880
At the time, I had absolutely knew no idea what
14
00:00:58.960 --> 00:01:01.920
it was. But before the in the day, I realized
15
00:01:02.399 --> 00:01:05.159
I was carrying something I didn't realize I knew who
16
00:01:05.159 --> 00:01:08.719
I had. At first, I didn't understand what was happening.
17
00:01:09.239 --> 00:01:11.920
As we walked through the park, little pieces of my
18
00:01:12.079 --> 00:01:16.079
child who had just started surfacing. I'd come here as
19
00:01:16.120 --> 00:01:22.040
a child, and I had flashes of other times. Then
20
00:01:22.079 --> 00:01:26.239
one memory stopped me. I was in the Ozarks, which
21
00:01:26.519 --> 00:01:30.319
is where silver Dollar City is and I was in
22
00:01:30.359 --> 00:01:34.040
the Ozarks with my friend Steve, and we wanted beer.
23
00:01:34.920 --> 00:01:38.040
We weren't old enough to buy it, so we spotted
24
00:01:38.079 --> 00:01:40.879
a guy who looked like the kind of a person
25
00:01:40.920 --> 00:01:45.640
who would buy kids beer. He was literally a hell's angel,
26
00:01:46.280 --> 00:01:48.959
had set it on the back of his leather vest,
27
00:01:49.480 --> 00:01:53.560
had a long beard, tattoos, and we looked at each
28
00:01:53.560 --> 00:01:56.519
other and thought this is going to be easy. Instead,
29
00:01:56.760 --> 00:02:00.239
he looked straight at us in the eye and said, no,
30
00:02:00.879 --> 00:02:04.760
the police watch us. I'm not buying beer for kids.
31
00:02:05.840 --> 00:02:09.599
I remember being stunned that man who looked the toughest
32
00:02:09.800 --> 00:02:13.680
ended up having more integrity than we did. A little later,
33
00:02:13.800 --> 00:02:18.719
an ordinary looking man bought it for us without hesitation.
34
00:02:20.199 --> 00:02:24.520
Funny how life works. As we kept walking, another memory surface.
35
00:02:24.759 --> 00:02:31.199
Back then, I tied beer in my neighbor's trash can. Well,
36
00:02:31.840 --> 00:02:35.000
on this day, the neighbor found it while he was
37
00:02:35.039 --> 00:02:40.120
cutting grass, so I quickly ran inside, called his house,
38
00:02:40.960 --> 00:02:43.840
asked for him. I shaid his chuck there in a
39
00:02:43.879 --> 00:02:46.919
deep voice, and then he went inside. And when he
40
00:02:47.000 --> 00:02:50.680
went inside, I went back and got the beer out
41
00:02:50.680 --> 00:02:55.159
of the trash can. I thought I was clever. Today,
42
00:02:55.240 --> 00:02:59.960
I see something very different. Those weren't isolated moments. Drinking
43
00:03:00.159 --> 00:03:04.599
slowly became normal. Eventually I was driving drunk. I had
44
00:03:04.719 --> 00:03:07.879
slept in my car because I couldn't make it home,
45
00:03:08.759 --> 00:03:13.439
and looking back, I can see where it was all leading.
46
00:03:14.919 --> 00:03:18.159
But then another memory came back, and then this one
47
00:03:18.360 --> 00:03:23.159
changed the way I saw myself. I remembered being in
48
00:03:23.199 --> 00:03:27.759
the eighth grade drunk out on the street, dancing like
49
00:03:27.800 --> 00:03:31.680
a complete fool. My friends were laughing at it, and
50
00:03:32.120 --> 00:03:35.960
I loved it, not because I was drunk, because for
51
00:03:36.120 --> 00:03:40.919
those few minutes, I felt accepted. I felt like I belonged,
52
00:03:42.159 --> 00:03:46.680
and standing in Branson, in the Lake of the Ozarks,
53
00:03:46.800 --> 00:03:51.520
in silver dollars sent city, something finally clicked. For years,
54
00:03:51.719 --> 00:03:57.120
I thought pornography was my kryptonite. Then I came to
55
00:03:57.159 --> 00:04:03.439
believe maybe alcohol was. Remember the iceberg, that the kryptonite
56
00:04:03.479 --> 00:04:09.479
iceberg that I had talked about. Pornography was above the surface,
57
00:04:09.719 --> 00:04:15.080
alcohol was above the surface. Those were the behaviors. The
58
00:04:15.120 --> 00:04:21.199
real kryptonite was underneath the kryptonite iceberg. And suddenly I
59
00:04:21.279 --> 00:04:25.319
wasn't looking at alcohol anymore. I was looking at a
60
00:04:25.399 --> 00:04:28.399
sixth grade boy who wanted an eighth grade girl to
61
00:04:28.480 --> 00:04:33.879
think he mattered that's where this really began. I wasn't
62
00:04:33.959 --> 00:04:38.399
chasing alcohol, I wasn't chasing pornography. I was chasing acceptance,
63
00:04:38.959 --> 00:04:42.240
the feeling that someone noticed me, liked me, wanted me,
64
00:04:42.600 --> 00:04:47.079
or laughed with me. Maybe then I'd find finally be enough.
65
00:04:47.720 --> 00:04:51.720
Because my father was a great man, and I love him,
66
00:04:51.720 --> 00:04:54.839
and I know he loved me, but he was a
67
00:04:55.040 --> 00:05:02.959
professor and was almost logical like Spock, and so honestly,
68
00:05:04.360 --> 00:05:08.079
I felt like I was ignored, and I think I
69
00:05:08.160 --> 00:05:13.319
was looking for acceptance from curls or friends, and so
70
00:05:13.439 --> 00:05:18.680
alcohol wasn't my kryptonite, and actually really wasn't sorted. Although
71
00:05:18.720 --> 00:05:22.040
those are kryptonite, things are the tip of the iceberg scored,
72
00:05:22.240 --> 00:05:24.759
those were the symptoms you get scored in. My deeper
73
00:05:24.800 --> 00:05:28.519
kryptonite was believing I needed someone else's approval to believe
74
00:05:28.839 --> 00:05:32.759
I had value. And once I could finally see what
75
00:05:32.920 --> 00:05:37.480
was below the surface, everything above the surface started making sense.
76
00:05:38.600 --> 00:05:42.560
Maybe that's true for you too. Maybe the thing you've
77
00:05:42.600 --> 00:05:48.120
been fighting isn't actually the kryptonite. Maybe you are on top,
78
00:05:49.040 --> 00:05:55.600
you're fighting the top of the kryptonite iceberg. Maybe it's
79
00:05:55.759 --> 00:06:03.000
just pointing you towards the real kryptonite. I came to
80
00:06:03.040 --> 00:06:07.439
Brandson expecting to make new memories. Instead, I uncovered one
81
00:06:07.439 --> 00:06:10.639
of the oldest memories I had, and it helped me
82
00:06:10.879 --> 00:06:16.480
understand what had really been weakening me all along. Maybe
83
00:06:16.480 --> 00:06:20.040
that's true for you too. Maybe the thing you've been
84
00:06:20.160 --> 00:06:25.319
finding isn't actually your kryptonite, maybe it's just pointing to it.
85
00:06:26.319 --> 00:06:30.399
So let me leave you with one question, what's your kryptonite?
86
00:06:30.839 --> 00:06:36.639
Or maybe an even better question, what's below your kryptonite Iceberg?
87
00:06:37.519 --> 00:06:43.639
Because everybody has kryptonite, and everybody has behaviors, but not
88
00:06:43.839 --> 00:06:49.319
everyone discovers what's underneath them. If today's episode made you think,
89
00:06:49.800 --> 00:06:52.720
I've put together some free resources to help you again
90
00:06:52.879 --> 00:06:58.560
uncovering your own kryptonite, visit powerflaeric dot com. Until next time,
91
00:06:59.199 --> 00:07:10.360
bring it to life and reclaim your night. Mm hmm
1
00:00:00.600 --> 00:00:04.120
I started drinking in the sixth grade. I remember getting
2
00:00:04.160 --> 00:00:06.360
drunk because I wanted an eighth grade girl to think
3
00:00:06.400 --> 00:00:09.759
I was cool. The strange part is I had completely
4
00:00:09.839 --> 00:00:12.720
forgotten about it for over forty years until I came
5
00:00:12.800 --> 00:00:16.839
back here. And once that memory came back, everything changed.
6
00:00:23.800 --> 00:00:26.280
What if the biggest thing that is stealing your joy
7
00:00:26.399 --> 00:00:30.640
isn't what you think. I didn't realize it until I
8
00:00:30.719 --> 00:00:36.520
discovered another form of kryptonite. This is kryptonite on location. Today,
9
00:00:36.600 --> 00:00:40.719
I'm at Silver Dollar City in Branson, Missouri. People come
10
00:00:40.759 --> 00:00:45.240
here for fun. They come here to make memories, to laugh,
11
00:00:45.359 --> 00:00:50.719
to ride rollercoasters, to watch shows. My family came here
12
00:00:50.759 --> 00:00:55.439
to make memories. Instead, I stumbled onto another form of kryptonite.
13
00:00:56.280 --> 00:00:58.880
At the time, I had absolutely knew no idea what
14
00:00:58.960 --> 00:01:01.920
it was. But before the in the day, I realized
15
00:01:02.399 --> 00:01:05.159
I was carrying something I didn't realize I knew who
16
00:01:05.159 --> 00:01:08.719
I had. At first, I didn't understand what was happening.
17
00:01:09.239 --> 00:01:11.920
As we walked through the park, little pieces of my
18
00:01:12.079 --> 00:01:16.079
child who had just started surfacing. I'd come here as
19
00:01:16.120 --> 00:01:22.040
a child, and I had flashes of other times. Then
20
00:01:22.079 --> 00:01:26.239
one memory stopped me. I was in the Ozarks, which
21
00:01:26.519 --> 00:01:30.319
is where silver Dollar City is and I was in
22
00:01:30.359 --> 00:01:34.040
the Ozarks with my friend Steve, and we wanted beer.
23
00:01:34.920 --> 00:01:38.040
We weren't old enough to buy it, so we spotted
24
00:01:38.079 --> 00:01:40.879
a guy who looked like the kind of a person
25
00:01:40.920 --> 00:01:45.640
who would buy kids beer. He was literally a hell's angel,
26
00:01:46.280 --> 00:01:48.959
had set it on the back of his leather vest,
27
00:01:49.480 --> 00:01:53.560
had a long beard, tattoos, and we looked at each
28
00:01:53.560 --> 00:01:56.519
other and thought this is going to be easy. Instead,
29
00:01:56.760 --> 00:02:00.239
he looked straight at us in the eye and said, no,
30
00:02:00.879 --> 00:02:04.760
the police watch us. I'm not buying beer for kids.
31
00:02:05.840 --> 00:02:09.599
I remember being stunned that man who looked the toughest
32
00:02:09.800 --> 00:02:13.680
ended up having more integrity than we did. A little later,
33
00:02:13.800 --> 00:02:18.719
an ordinary looking man bought it for us without hesitation.
34
00:02:20.199 --> 00:02:24.520
Funny how life works. As we kept walking, another memory surface.
35
00:02:24.759 --> 00:02:31.199
Back then, I tied beer in my neighbor's trash can. Well,
36
00:02:31.840 --> 00:02:35.000
on this day, the neighbor found it while he was
37
00:02:35.039 --> 00:02:40.120
cutting grass, so I quickly ran inside, called his house,
38
00:02:40.960 --> 00:02:43.840
asked for him. I shaid his chuck there in a
39
00:02:43.879 --> 00:02:46.919
deep voice, and then he went inside. And when he
40
00:02:47.000 --> 00:02:50.680
went inside, I went back and got the beer out
41
00:02:50.680 --> 00:02:55.159
of the trash can. I thought I was clever. Today,
42
00:02:55.240 --> 00:02:59.960
I see something very different. Those weren't isolated moments. Drinking
43
00:03:00.159 --> 00:03:04.599
slowly became normal. Eventually I was driving drunk. I had
44
00:03:04.719 --> 00:03:07.879
slept in my car because I couldn't make it home,
45
00:03:08.759 --> 00:03:13.439
and looking back, I can see where it was all leading.
46
00:03:14.919 --> 00:03:18.159
But then another memory came back, and then this one
47
00:03:18.360 --> 00:03:23.159
changed the way I saw myself. I remembered being in
48
00:03:23.199 --> 00:03:27.759
the eighth grade drunk out on the street, dancing like
49
00:03:27.800 --> 00:03:31.680
a complete fool. My friends were laughing at it, and
50
00:03:32.120 --> 00:03:35.960
I loved it, not because I was drunk, because for
51
00:03:36.120 --> 00:03:40.919
those few minutes, I felt accepted. I felt like I belonged,
52
00:03:42.159 --> 00:03:46.680
and standing in Branson, in the Lake of the Ozarks,
53
00:03:46.800 --> 00:03:51.520
in silver dollars sent city, something finally clicked. For years,
54
00:03:51.719 --> 00:03:57.120
I thought pornography was my kryptonite. Then I came to
55
00:03:57.159 --> 00:04:03.439
believe maybe alcohol was. Remember the iceberg, that the kryptonite
56
00:04:03.479 --> 00:04:09.479
iceberg that I had talked about. Pornography was above the surface,
57
00:04:09.719 --> 00:04:15.080
alcohol was above the surface. Those were the behaviors. The
58
00:04:15.120 --> 00:04:21.199
real kryptonite was underneath the kryptonite iceberg. And suddenly I
59
00:04:21.279 --> 00:04:25.319
wasn't looking at alcohol anymore. I was looking at a
60
00:04:25.399 --> 00:04:28.399
sixth grade boy who wanted an eighth grade girl to
61
00:04:28.480 --> 00:04:33.879
think he mattered that's where this really began. I wasn't
62
00:04:33.959 --> 00:04:38.399
chasing alcohol, I wasn't chasing pornography. I was chasing acceptance,
63
00:04:38.959 --> 00:04:42.240
the feeling that someone noticed me, liked me, wanted me,
64
00:04:42.600 --> 00:04:47.079
or laughed with me. Maybe then I'd find finally be enough.
65
00:04:47.720 --> 00:04:51.720
Because my father was a great man, and I love him,
66
00:04:51.720 --> 00:04:54.839
and I know he loved me, but he was a
67
00:04:55.040 --> 00:05:02.959
professor and was almost logical like Spock, and so honestly,
68
00:05:04.360 --> 00:05:08.079
I felt like I was ignored, and I think I
69
00:05:08.160 --> 00:05:13.319
was looking for acceptance from curls or friends, and so
70
00:05:13.439 --> 00:05:18.680
alcohol wasn't my kryptonite, and actually really wasn't sorted. Although
71
00:05:18.720 --> 00:05:22.040
those are kryptonite, things are the tip of the iceberg scored,
72
00:05:22.240 --> 00:05:24.759
those were the symptoms you get scored in. My deeper
73
00:05:24.800 --> 00:05:28.519
kryptonite was believing I needed someone else's approval to believe
74
00:05:28.839 --> 00:05:32.759
I had value. And once I could finally see what
75
00:05:32.920 --> 00:05:37.480
was below the surface, everything above the surface started making sense.
76
00:05:38.600 --> 00:05:42.560
Maybe that's true for you too. Maybe the thing you've
77
00:05:42.600 --> 00:05:48.120
been fighting isn't actually the kryptonite. Maybe you are on top,
78
00:05:49.040 --> 00:05:55.600
you're fighting the top of the kryptonite iceberg. Maybe it's
79
00:05:55.759 --> 00:06:03.000
just pointing you towards the real kryptonite. I came to
80
00:06:03.040 --> 00:06:07.439
Brandson expecting to make new memories. Instead, I uncovered one
81
00:06:07.439 --> 00:06:10.639
of the oldest memories I had, and it helped me
82
00:06:10.879 --> 00:06:16.480
understand what had really been weakening me all along. Maybe
83
00:06:16.480 --> 00:06:20.040
that's true for you too. Maybe the thing you've been
84
00:06:20.160 --> 00:06:25.319
finding isn't actually your kryptonite, maybe it's just pointing to it.
85
00:06:26.319 --> 00:06:30.399
So let me leave you with one question, what's your kryptonite?
86
00:06:30.839 --> 00:06:36.639
Or maybe an even better question, what's below your kryptonite Iceberg?
87
00:06:37.519 --> 00:06:43.639
Because everybody has kryptonite, and everybody has behaviors, but not
88
00:06:43.839 --> 00:06:49.319
everyone discovers what's underneath them. If today's episode made you think,
89
00:06:49.800 --> 00:06:52.720
I've put together some free resources to help you again
90
00:06:52.879 --> 00:06:58.560
uncovering your own kryptonite, visit powerflaeric dot com. Until next time,
91
00:06:59.199 --> 00:07:10.360
bring it to life and reclaim your night. Mm hmm
