introducing Goddess Hecate | LoyalFans: @HecateReigns | Brand New Faces

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You're watching Brand New Faces. I'm your host, Matt, and
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I'm joined tonight by a very special guest. Now, you
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can find her on Twitter and loyal fans at Hecate Rains.
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I'm going to spell that for you. H-E-C-A-T-E Rains. R-E-I-G-N-S.
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You can also go to goddesshecate.com to get links to everything.
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Ladies and gentlemen, my guest for the evening, goddesshecaterains.com. Miss Hecate,
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Miss Goddess, how are you this evening?
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I'm wonderful. How are you?
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I am terrified in a positive way. I am. I am.
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I you. I'm going to give a little backstory. So
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when I messaged you and said, hey, I would love
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to have you on now. To be fair, I look
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for a couple of things when I'm doing this. I
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look is the person attractive, obviously. And they're not. That's
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not the number one factor. But yes, you check that off. Attractive.
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Number two is, are they actually interesting? tied into the industry?
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Is this just a passing thing? They've got a couple
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topless picks up on there and say, hit my OF. And,
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you know, that's to me, it's not the same thing.
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The other thing is, is this person fascinating? Are they
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introducing something I have no concept of? Now, I've done
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200 of these interviews. I've talked to some of the
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biggest names in the industry. But When I messaged you
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and said, hey, would you be interested in coming on?
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You said, yeah, but this is my thing. And I
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don't know if that's going to be too much for you.
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And I'll be honest with you. I don't know if
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it's going to be too much for me. So I'm
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excited to jump into this tonight.
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Okay, great.
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Can I start with the third rudest question you can
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ask a woman?
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And.
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If it is off the table, I completely understand that
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the first rudest question. And by the way, when I
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said this, a girl answered the first two. That's not
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what I'm looking for. It's the joke to set up
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the third one. First rudest question you can ask a
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woman is how much do you weigh? The second rudest
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question you can ask a woman is, are you pregnant?
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And the third rudest question, which I am going to
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ask you is, will you say how old you are?
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Yes, I'm 40.
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You look incredible for 40.
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Well, thank you.
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Can I be honest? I don't know why I had
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the number in my head. I had 31 in my
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head for you. And I was like, damn, she looks
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fucking good for 31, too.
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We certainly know how to flatter a lady.
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Thank you. I try my best. I grew up listening
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to some rap songs and they would always say 35, 40, blah, blah, blah, blah.
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And I don't know those numbers and I don't know
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what they mean. So I came up with my own
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set of numbers for the show. Could I ask you
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what your height is?
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It's 5'6.
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Okay. Can I ask you what your cup size is
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besides wonderful?
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34 Triple D.
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No judgment on them, but for my feet guys out there,
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not necessarily my thing. I totally understand if it is, though.
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Can I ask what your shoe size is?
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Nine and a half.
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Okay. All right. Take me through how you initially decided
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to get into the adult entertainment industry and whatever facet
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that was. Whether it was dancing, camming, this, that, shooting
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gangbangs on the side. Whatever you decided to do to
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cross the line from vanilla world, quote unquote, into the
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world we are here. Can you take me through that?
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And then I'd love for us to go into what
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exactly you do do. Sure.
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So when I first started... My partner and I, who's
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on most of our content at this point, he is
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my slave. But when we started, I was actually his
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slave in a consensual 24-7 BDSM relationship. And so we
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produced content that was the other way around. Oh, man,
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I didn't know we could smoke in here.
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You do whatever you like. You do whatever you like. Oh,
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damn it.
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I don't have it with me.
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You know what? Would you like to pause?
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Oh, my God, I would.
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All right. We're back. We're back from a smoke-related technical issue. Okay. Yeah,
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it's missing. So I apologize. Take me through it.
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How.
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By the way, if you're just listening to this, I
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do appreciate that, but please... Please check out this video
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and then go anywhere she tells you to go.
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OK.
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Goddess Hecate dot com links to everything are going to
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be in the episode description. Just so you know, take
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me through it. And then I got questions for you.
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So you start out as a slave and then how
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does it reverse? Because it seems to me, again, I'm
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going to speak as an ignorant outside person. And if
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I say something, it's not out of any kind of
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malice or nastiness. It is literally just ignorance. Yeah.
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Yeah, it's not known by a lot of people.
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So how do you go from that to that? Like if,
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you know, good.
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Yeah. So my my partner who I'm going to refer
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to as Piggy, my partner, Piggy and I, we our
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relationship started as a BDSM relationship. It was actually very casual.
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And so the first part of our relationship, he we
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started exploring BDSM. I came from it. I came to
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it from a. masochist point more than the power exchange,
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which is the dominant submissive, you know, master slave kind
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of relationship. And that was something that Piggy was interested in.
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And so we started playing with both. And I started
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discovering my interest in playing on the dominant side as well.
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And so over time, our relationship has been every once
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in a while, we just kind of switch back and forth. So,
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which is we have come to find is actually pretty unusual,
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even in the BDSM community, that most people like they
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might switch in scene, but most people in a relationship
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like pick one and kind of stick with it.
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Well, see, and that's again, that's kind of what I
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thought from the outside. It was like to me, it was.
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And again, ignorance. I thought it was more like sexual
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preference where it was like, I grew up liking chicks.
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I like chicks. I'm a cis, whatever you want to say, male.
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I don't have any problem with dudes. I think they're
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a lot more fun to talk to than chicks, if
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I'm being honest. But just kidding. As I mostly talk
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to chicks. What I will say is I thought it
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was kind of like ingrained, like in your personality. Now,
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I know there's switches and people who go back and forth.
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Exactly.
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I can't I find it tough to figure out in
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my own head how to process. You were once a
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slave and now you are like it. It seems like
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your partner, Peggy, wonderful name, by the way, got called
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it plenty of times as a kid. Here's what I wonder.
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Was it in him, do you think, to be able
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to switch? Or was this a... Did you guys... Let
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me ask this, actually. Did you guys get bored to
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an extent in the role you were in? Not that
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you hated and can't do it or anything like that again,
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but if you were 24-7 in this role over here,
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was it like... Who was the first one who was like,
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what if we just try the other way for once?
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Was it you that pushed it? Was it he that
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pushed it?
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Um, so the very beginning of our relationship where, so I'll,
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I'll also preface this by saying we're polyamorous and we
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have been since the beginning of our relationship. And so
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at the very beginning, um, we were actually both married
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to other people, um, in consensual polyamorous relationships. And, um,
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we started very casually, uh, we, we were not expecting
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this to turn into a marriage. Um, and when we started, um,
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like I said, I wasn't super interested in what I
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had a lot of misconceptions, like preconceived ideas about what
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it actually looks like to be in a 24 seven
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power exchange relationship. And most people do, you know, I mean, it's.
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especially because most of the portrayals um are non-consensual um
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we're abusive in some way um they're very rarely portrayed
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in a positive way um and so or if it
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is then somebody dies you know uh same as lesbian
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movies you know sure um for a really long time
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so um I kind of lost my train of thought.
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I always do that. Don't sweat it. Don't sweat it. Oh,
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who was the who was the first one that went,
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let's change this power?
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So I was like, you know, it's fine that you're
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interested in a 24 seven power exchange, but I would
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never be someone's slave. Like, I would never do that.
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And he was like, well, that's fine. Then what if
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I was your slave? Like, would you be interested in that?
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And I had never considered that as a possibility, like
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me playing on the other side. I had done a
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little bit of topping as a sadist, but it's a
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little it's like it sounds like a subtle nuance. But
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there's kind of a difference between someone consenting to be
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given pain from someone else, which is the sadomasochist relationship.
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The sadist is the person who enjoys hurting and the
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masochist is the person who enjoys being hurt. But with
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the power exchange, there's more there. There's more of a
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submission of will. Like you're doing anything they say. And
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sometimes that may include pain if that's something that you've negotiated,
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but it can encompass all sorts of areas of life.
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You know, there's a really funny meme that I don't
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know if it ever made it to the vanilla world,
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but I used to come across it all the time.
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And it's this sub who's like, you know, master, I'll
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do anything you want. And the master says, anything? So
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I was like, anything, anything? And he's like, all right,
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drink more water. What? get eight hours of sleep what
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no like realize all of your dreams go back to
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college and it's like how submissive are you willing to
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be you know and so um And different relationships will
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have different parts of them be under that control. In
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order to not be abusive, it's always something that's negotiated
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and enthusiastically consented to. Um, and in a very casual relationship,
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like what we had, um, it was a lot of
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things like, you know, send me a picture of your penis, uh,
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right now, or like wear a butt plug when you
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go out today and that kind of thing. Um, and
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it was fun. And when they were very low stakes
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and a really casual relationship, it was fun to experiment with. Um,
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And eventually, like the way that I saw him enjoying it.
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And because, like I said, I was already a masochist.
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So I definitely understood bottoming to some extent, but maybe
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not submitting my will. You know, there's... a lot of
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stigma for women about that you know we're supposed to
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do it but we're also not supposed to do it
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and it's uh so i you know i was raised
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by a very um a very strong woman and i
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there was definitely a lot of um push in my
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house to to be a go-getter and to to no
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matter what like it was very much it doesn't matter
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what gender you are like figure out what you like
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kind of thing um You said so.
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Sorry.
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No, no, no.
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I apologize. No, everyone hates when I talk. I'll be
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honest with you. That's why above me it says they're
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here for you. Don't be afraid to keep talking. But
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I do have a question about something you said. And
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I noticed it on your website, too. You said it
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wasn't so much the power dynamic at first. It was
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the actual masochism. Oh, yeah, for me. This is not
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an offensive thing because I wish it happened. I fucking
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hate being sore. I fucking hate being hurt. I don't
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like waking up and getting out of bed in the morning.
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It doesn't feel good. Do you have something that's connected differently?
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I know they say the pleasure center is right next
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to the pain center or something along those lines.
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Yeah.
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How did you find out you liked Mastic? Did you
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break your leg as a fucking kid? Or when were
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you like, when were you like, you know what? I
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like being hurt.
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Well, so when I was a kid, I wish it
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had a more, I don't know what the politically correct
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name for it is, but we used to call.
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It an Indian burn.
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Oh, yeah. You know what I'm talking about?
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Yeah, totally. By the way, as a person who's one
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32nd Native American, I take no offense to that. Yeah.
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Thank you. So I used to like probably the first
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like looking back now on what masochism is, because I
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had no idea then. That's probably the first indication of
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it was that I used to challenge kids to like
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I'd be like, see if you can get me to
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say uncle, you know, and then I sit there and
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let them do it until they gave up. And then
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I'd be like, now it's my turn.
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Oh, man.
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And I'd almost always get them to say uncle. And
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that was like the first sign, I guess, that it
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was fun for me in some way. And then when
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I was 10, I finally got my mom to take
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me to get my ears pierced for the first time.
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And I'd been banging for years. And we went to Claire's,
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which is terrible. No one go to Claire's when you
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get pierced. Go to a reputable body piercing shop, please. Yeah.
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With app approved piercers everyone goes to claire's by the
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way yep i agree with everyone everyone goes to claire's
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i agree with.
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You they shouldn't they shouldn't kids okay i'm serious this
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is like a psa right now i because i am
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very much a body piercing enthusiast um reputable aap um
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approved body piercing shops a lot of them will pierce
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kids ears and it is so much safer than some
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fucking teenager who got an hour preparation just don't fucking
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do it Anyway, so that's what my mom did because
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everybody did that back then. And so are you familiar
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at all with how they pierce ears at Claire's?
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I think isn't it? No, we'll look. I'm 38. So
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I remember how they did it 25 years ago when
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girls in my class were getting it done. But it
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was a gun, right?
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Yeah, it's like with a gun. And it's like they
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actually pierce you with the backside of the earring. Which
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is incredibly dull and, you know, a lot more painful
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than a hypernermic needle, which is what they use at
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a piercing shop. But so the first one that I got,
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it was... A pivotal moment in my life. Like, I
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had never experienced anything like that. And I almost didn't
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get the second one. And then my mom, like, I mean,
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I was like having a moment, like I was sobbing
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and like, I can't do this.
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I don't want him anymore.
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And so she sat down with me for a minute
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and she was like, okay. If you want, like we
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can go home. We can either take it out or
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leave it and we can try to come back again.
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Or it's just going to take a couple more seconds
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and then you'll have them and it'll be over. And
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I'll hold your hand the whole time. And so I
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so I held her hand and I got the second one.
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And the whole ride home like that, the warm, the
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warmth of my ears, like I was so aware of
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a part of my body that I had never been
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aware of before. know um but in there was also
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this sense of uh an endorphin rush that comes with
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that as well and it lasted for a long time
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and it was not long before i was asking my
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mom to let me get more and she eventually did
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and then um so she let me get a couple
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more low piercings at claire's and then i as a
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teenager discovered um body piercing on the internet and that
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was yeah So that was my first acceptable outlet for masochism,
305
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which I did not have a name for yet. I
306
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was raised pretty sheltered, conservative Christian. And so, yeah, I
307
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just didn't even know about a lot of this stuff
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until my 20s.
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OK, so then how do you start knowing about this
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type of stuff? Like it's it's that's so interesting to
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me that that you like I have a very good memory.
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I remember like specific days. I remember what it smelled
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like in the room. I remember word for word what
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people said. Would you say you have that same feeling
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with that? The Claire's ear piercing?
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Oh, yeah. Very much so.
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So that's a pivotal moment.
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It's a very vivid memory.
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And you said it was warmth, right? It was like, yeah.
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Do you still feel that warmth now when you do it?
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Any kind of masochism onto you? Yeah. Yeah.
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Yeah. Very much so. Hey.
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Yeah.
324
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Yeah. Just like continue. I don't know if you can
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see them. I've got like a bunch on my ears
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and then I reopen this one and nose. I haven't
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done my nipples yet, but I do have.
328
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Oh, my goodness. I was gonna say I have no
329
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tattoos no piercing my wife is all pierced all over
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she's got like 15 tattoos and she's got appointments for
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new sleeves and this and that so.
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So can I do the rest of the podcast with her?
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You know what? I can't tell you how many times
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women have probably thought that. But she she she doesn't
335
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like talking that much.
336
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Oh, I get that.
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Which, you know, kind of gives she's more of the
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masochist there. And I'm the sadist by babbling constantly and
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never giving her a chance to think.
340
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Nice.
341
00:17:48.289 --> 00:17:51.470
So when you transition then into the next role many
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years later where you are becoming a sadist or even
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if it's just, you know, in your 20s, if you
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experience it a little, is it the same warmth you
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felt or is it a different kind of warmth? And
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how do you I don't know. How does your mind
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process that? Like if you were to get piercings before,
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you know, for it was it was like a five
349
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out of 10 on the pain scale, say. And at
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some point you experienced 8 out of 10 in your
351
00:18:17.579 --> 00:18:20.579
life and maybe even 10 out of 10. When you're
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doing something sadistic to somebody, and that sounds worse than
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it is to the outside world.
354
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Consensually doing something sadistic to somebody.
355
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When you are consensually doing something sadistic. Oh, man, that's
356
00:18:32.119 --> 00:18:38.299
a good one. Yeah. Sadistic, sadistic. OK, to somebody. Is
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there do you get that same rush? Is it a
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different feeling? And how do you escalate it? Like scratching
359
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is a one or choking is a three. Like, how
360
00:18:50.170 --> 00:18:52.670
do you figure out like what is the rush you
361
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get and how do you figure out either how to
362
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escalate that rush or how to get it to where
363
00:18:56.750 --> 00:18:57.410
you want it to be?
364
00:18:59.170 --> 00:19:02.839
So it's definitely a different. It's a different kind of rush.
365
00:19:04.369 --> 00:19:07.990
Experiencing the actual pain and submitting to that and going
366
00:19:08.029 --> 00:19:10.130
through that experience is.
367
00:19:11.930 --> 00:19:15.589
This is going to sound weird, especially because if you
368
00:19:15.670 --> 00:19:17.809
looked at me while I was going through it, you
369
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would think that I was hating it. I scream, I cry,
370
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I look like I'm being tortured. And then at the
371
00:19:27.460 --> 00:19:29.000
end of it, I'll be like, thanks, that was great!
372
00:19:30.960 --> 00:19:33.440
Well, let me interrupt you real quick. So then that's
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00:19:33.759 --> 00:19:37.759
kind of similar to Claire's. You screamed, you were crying.
374
00:19:38.160 --> 00:19:40.809
And then at the end of it now. But let
375
00:19:40.829 --> 00:19:44.789
me ask, while you're going through it, are you getting
376
00:19:44.829 --> 00:19:47.750
that same enjoyment or is it the quote unquote pop
377
00:19:47.829 --> 00:19:49.750
at the end where you're like, this is where it
378
00:19:49.769 --> 00:19:52.259
all starts? floods to me? Are you are you hating
379
00:19:52.299 --> 00:19:54.369
it in the moment? Not that you would stop doing it.
380
00:19:54.400 --> 00:19:56.859
Not that it's not consensual. Just the way you're screaming,
381
00:19:56.900 --> 00:19:58.809
the way you're feeling. No, not at all. No.
382
00:19:59.049 --> 00:20:04.529
Yeah. No, it's awesome. OK. It's it's scary, too. It's
383
00:20:04.569 --> 00:20:16.279
very intense. And like. Can you hate something if you
384
00:20:16.440 --> 00:20:20.910
deeply crave it and need it? Or is that love,
385
00:20:21.109 --> 00:20:23.200
no matter how it looks like when you're getting it?
386
00:20:24.930 --> 00:20:29.609
You know, I don't. Can you hate something if you're
387
00:20:29.630 --> 00:20:31.150
craving it? Yes.
388
00:20:32.940 --> 00:20:33.279
Yes.
389
00:20:33.519 --> 00:20:33.859
Okay.
390
00:20:34.259 --> 00:20:35.559
I suppose it is bad for you.
391
00:20:35.740 --> 00:20:39.660
I'm going to say you can. No, not probably not
392
00:20:39.799 --> 00:20:41.819
while you're enjoying it, but you can definitely.
393
00:20:41.839 --> 00:20:44.559
All right. I'm at the end.
394
00:20:44.680 --> 00:20:46.740
I've lost a bunch of weight, but I've not I've
395
00:20:46.779 --> 00:20:50.759
never been a skinny guy. Right. So I love just
396
00:20:51.259 --> 00:20:55.000
eating food. And then at the end, I feel like
397
00:20:55.200 --> 00:20:58.019
dog shit and I feel like dog shit the next day.
398
00:20:59.400 --> 00:21:01.529
I have people in my life who have had drug
399
00:21:01.589 --> 00:21:03.890
problems and everything else. And you can't say in the
400
00:21:03.950 --> 00:21:05.690
moment they're probably not enjoying it.
401
00:21:05.710 --> 00:21:06.329
That's true.
402
00:21:06.549 --> 00:21:09.170
And then after the fact, it's like, so I totally
403
00:21:09.569 --> 00:21:12.150
I'm not I'm not trying to counter your point at all.
404
00:21:12.170 --> 00:21:15.130
I just because it was a fascinating question. Can you
405
00:21:15.190 --> 00:21:16.069
hate something if?
406
00:21:16.339 --> 00:21:18.859
Yeah, no, you're right, though. You absolutely can.
407
00:21:18.940 --> 00:21:21.160
There's ways those are more. I would say that stuff's
408
00:21:21.220 --> 00:21:27.839
more destructive. And yeah, you know, yeah. You, I, you know, sorry,
409
00:21:27.859 --> 00:21:28.599
I didn't mean to take it off.
410
00:21:28.619 --> 00:21:33.180
Pain becomes almost a way to process emotions, you know,
411
00:21:33.200 --> 00:21:42.430
that there are not as many opportunities in life to
412
00:21:42.950 --> 00:21:49.470
experience deep emotions in a safe way, you know, like.
413
00:21:50.099 --> 00:21:54.400
And so that's, that's part of it is like processing emotions, um,
414
00:21:54.940 --> 00:21:56.940
throughout the day and that kind of thing. Like it's
415
00:21:57.559 --> 00:22:00.400
all this stuff gets stored in your body and built
416
00:22:00.539 --> 00:22:06.049
up and it's, it's like this, it's a very cathartic release. Sure. Honestly. Um,
417
00:22:07.869 --> 00:22:09.890
and yeah, I mean, it's, it's something I come back
418
00:22:09.910 --> 00:22:14.630
to and I, I do think it's possible for, like
419
00:22:14.670 --> 00:22:17.430
you said, like for it to be a destructive element
420
00:22:17.470 --> 00:22:21.559
in someone's life, you know? Um, and, kink and BSM
421
00:22:21.640 --> 00:22:24.319
is the way to learn how to harness it as
422
00:22:24.799 --> 00:22:28.579
a positive. Sure. I feel like, um, so, so like
423
00:22:28.640 --> 00:22:32.089
I was saying, the submissive side is, is a lot
424
00:22:32.140 --> 00:22:36.609
more experiential and, um, like right brained and I guess
425
00:22:36.690 --> 00:22:40.730
kind of hard to analyze that over like a warmth
426
00:22:40.829 --> 00:22:44.269
and floating and processing emotions kind of stuff. But the,
427
00:22:44.569 --> 00:22:50.799
the other side of it, um, is, I also used
428
00:22:51.559 --> 00:22:55.980
to be a massage therapist. It's one of the many
429
00:22:56.039 --> 00:23:00.400
things that I've done with my life. It feels very
430
00:23:00.500 --> 00:23:05.680
similar to that, like the reward of the sadism, because
431
00:23:05.930 --> 00:23:08.049
when people would come to me to get a massage,
432
00:23:09.069 --> 00:23:12.150
as much as there were techniques that I learned that
433
00:23:12.170 --> 00:23:15.650
I was using on a lot of people, each person
434
00:23:15.730 --> 00:23:19.079
is different. And I would learn to read each person
435
00:23:19.299 --> 00:23:24.400
and a really good massage therapists or really good dominatrix or,
436
00:23:24.420 --> 00:23:28.809
or just dominant in general, um, is one who can
437
00:23:28.970 --> 00:23:33.549
read the people that they're with, um, be able to communicate,
438
00:23:33.690 --> 00:23:38.529
ask questions and adjust to, according to that submissive experience,
439
00:23:38.569 --> 00:23:42.609
because every person is different, you know, like face slapping
440
00:23:42.670 --> 00:23:44.809
for one person is a one. They love it. And
441
00:23:44.890 --> 00:23:47.019
face slapping for another person is like a 10. Like,
442
00:23:47.119 --> 00:23:49.019
don't do it until you've already done a bunch of
443
00:23:49.059 --> 00:23:51.160
other stuff because you're going to end the scene with it. Like,
444
00:23:51.220 --> 00:23:51.940
it's going to be over.
445
00:23:51.960 --> 00:23:52.640
Right.
446
00:23:52.660 --> 00:23:54.400
You know, they're going to they're going to be finished.
447
00:23:55.059 --> 00:23:59.400
So it's just it's it's very it's fascinating how individualized
448
00:23:59.460 --> 00:24:00.680
it is in a lot of ways.
449
00:24:00.940 --> 00:24:05.019
Very much so. When you were in the masochist role,
450
00:24:06.160 --> 00:24:10.700
did anyone ever take it too far beyond your limits?
451
00:24:10.799 --> 00:24:15.240
And how do you I'm not talking about anything violent. Well,
452
00:24:15.380 --> 00:24:19.069
I guess I I'm wondering if anyone got too violent,
453
00:24:19.369 --> 00:24:22.670
but I don't mean in a unconsensual way. I mean,
454
00:24:22.730 --> 00:24:25.009
more like this is what we laid out. You're going
455
00:24:25.029 --> 00:24:27.190
to punch me in the ribs. And then he really
456
00:24:27.450 --> 00:24:30.569
fucking gave you one in the ribs. Um, is there,
457
00:24:30.849 --> 00:24:32.910
has anyone taken it too far to the point where
458
00:24:32.930 --> 00:24:35.549
you've been like furious about it? Or is that a
459
00:24:35.670 --> 00:24:40.519
time when you go, Hey, Hey, pause. That was too much. Um,
460
00:24:41.230 --> 00:24:43.380
you know, let's dial this back. Is it all just
461
00:24:43.410 --> 00:24:44.339
about communication?
462
00:24:45.079 --> 00:24:50.539
Yes. So, um, it is a, the relationship between a
463
00:24:50.559 --> 00:24:54.119
dominant and a submissive is a mutual one. And, um,
464
00:24:55.150 --> 00:24:58.470
So it is the responsibility of the submissive to be
465
00:24:58.589 --> 00:25:02.589
communicating their experience. And that also, I mean, there's a
466
00:25:02.630 --> 00:25:06.130
bunch of nuance there because if the dom is playing
467
00:25:06.150 --> 00:25:09.789
with a very inexperienced sub and the dom is experienced,
468
00:25:10.029 --> 00:25:12.819
they should be checking in way more often. If a
469
00:25:13.150 --> 00:25:16.140
submissive is playing with a really inexperienced dom, they should
470
00:25:16.180 --> 00:25:19.059
not expect them to know what to do exactly. They
471
00:25:19.079 --> 00:25:21.759
should be attempting to guide them through it. It's really
472
00:25:21.799 --> 00:25:29.339
about who has more experience. Um, and the, the submissive, um, uh,
473
00:25:29.380 --> 00:25:30.799
damn it. I lost my train of thought again. What
474
00:25:30.819 --> 00:25:32.000
are we talking about? I don't know.
475
00:25:32.059 --> 00:25:33.859
I came up with a funny joke. I was going
476
00:25:33.880 --> 00:25:38.299
to ask you if a submissive, a more experienced with
477
00:25:38.359 --> 00:25:42.650
a submissive with a less experienced Dom, could you call
478
00:25:42.690 --> 00:25:50.829
that submissive a power bottom? If they're directing or at
479
00:25:50.890 --> 00:25:53.170
least guiding or whatever.
480
00:25:53.190 --> 00:25:54.150
Yeah, so... I.
481
00:25:54.109 --> 00:25:56.670
Don't know if that's an offensive term. I don't mean
482
00:25:56.750 --> 00:25:57.009
if it is.
483
00:25:57.109 --> 00:25:59.660
Actually, yes. I.
484
00:26:01.369 --> 00:26:03.890
Although a lot of people will take issue with me
485
00:26:04.049 --> 00:26:07.089
conflating bottoming and submitting.
486
00:26:07.750 --> 00:26:10.309
Okay. Is that a thing? They are different.
487
00:26:10.470 --> 00:26:10.750
Okay.
488
00:26:11.029 --> 00:26:11.250
Okay.
489
00:26:11.289 --> 00:26:15.890
Fair. I know. They're weird distinctions. And I'm not as
490
00:26:15.950 --> 00:26:20.890
familiar with the bottoming because that tends to come up
491
00:26:21.019 --> 00:26:27.589
a lot more often. in circles with gay men, bombing, tabbing,
492
00:26:28.410 --> 00:26:31.599
and I don't have a ton of experience with that.
493
00:26:32.019 --> 00:26:33.680
I was starting to pour over into a lot of
494
00:26:33.700 --> 00:26:40.400
the other queer community. And yeah, so there's a, There's
495
00:26:40.599 --> 00:26:43.500
a language difference there that I'm not super well versed
496
00:26:43.619 --> 00:26:46.920
on that. I'm not sure that I'm the authority.
497
00:26:46.509 --> 00:26:51.390
To totally fair. As a guy with no experience whatsoever,
498
00:26:51.490 --> 00:26:53.869
I'm going to say that's what we'll all be calling
499
00:26:53.910 --> 00:26:56.279
it from now on. I'm putting that into the lexicon.
500
00:26:56.579 --> 00:27:00.420
I'll probably have 50 guys come kick in my door.
501
00:27:00.519 --> 00:27:02.380
Yeah. You're going to get me canceled.
502
00:27:02.700 --> 00:27:03.740
I'm going to get canceled.
503
00:27:05.619 --> 00:27:09.130
So I did remember it was about safe words. So
504
00:27:09.450 --> 00:27:13.049
it is the responsibility of the sub to be communicating
505
00:27:13.230 --> 00:27:17.250
what their experience actually is and to be using safe words.
506
00:27:18.269 --> 00:27:21.460
So are you familiar with the idea of a safe word?
507
00:27:22.480 --> 00:27:22.759
Butterfly.
508
00:27:25.099 --> 00:27:28.680
Do I need to check in with you? Is everything okay?
509
00:27:29.299 --> 00:27:31.420
Well, and I'm going to have a bigger question for that.
510
00:27:32.119 --> 00:27:35.589
But yes, the concept of safe words, hey, this means stop, pause,
511
00:27:35.869 --> 00:27:37.589
whatever it is, right? Right, right.
512
00:27:38.079 --> 00:27:42.799
And so if something is genuinely too much, then it
513
00:27:42.880 --> 00:27:45.000
is important for a submissive to use a safe word.
514
00:27:45.480 --> 00:27:49.099
And just to caveat that, that is not to say, like,
515
00:27:49.180 --> 00:27:54.140
there are circumstances where submissives, like, are in a state
516
00:27:54.200 --> 00:27:57.900
where they can't, you know, say it. And that's why
517
00:27:57.940 --> 00:28:01.900
it's important for a dominant to be reading cues and
518
00:28:01.940 --> 00:28:04.289
that kind of thing and know when to stop and
519
00:28:04.309 --> 00:28:05.690
check in on someone and, like.
520
00:28:08.619 --> 00:28:11.930
Being a responsible submissive is learning what your limits are.
521
00:28:12.009 --> 00:28:14.789
So part of that is like going beyond them sometimes.
522
00:28:15.309 --> 00:28:19.430
So have I called a safe word in a scene?
523
00:28:20.019 --> 00:28:25.720
Tons of times, lots for all kinds of reasons, which
524
00:28:25.819 --> 00:28:28.299
is really how it should be used. So sometimes it's
525
00:28:28.480 --> 00:28:31.289
too much pain. Sometimes it is like you said, that
526
00:28:31.369 --> 00:28:38.990
like emotions come up. um, very strong emotions, um, fear, anger, sadness, um,
527
00:28:39.130 --> 00:28:44.390
all kinds of things, uh, insecurity, jealousy, uh, anything that
528
00:28:44.430 --> 00:28:48.220
I'm like, okay, this isn't, this isn't good anymore. Like
529
00:28:48.259 --> 00:28:51.640
this isn't fun anymore. Um, because ultimately that is what
530
00:28:51.680 --> 00:28:53.960
it's supposed to be. It's supposed to be enjoyable for
531
00:28:54.000 --> 00:28:56.539
both parties. You know, it's supposed to be fun.
532
00:28:57.000 --> 00:28:59.859
Can, can I ask this? And again, this is strictly
533
00:28:59.900 --> 00:29:02.740
from ignorance and just being on short. Does, does, Does
534
00:29:02.839 --> 00:29:07.160
someone throwing out a safe word sometimes kill the mood?
535
00:29:08.980 --> 00:29:11.880
It's OK. Look, if it does kill the mood, that's fine.
536
00:29:12.019 --> 00:29:13.960
We don't want anyone hurt. We don't want anything like that.
537
00:29:14.819 --> 00:29:17.279
I totally understand. And I respect safe word and all
538
00:29:17.299 --> 00:29:19.519
of that. But I'm just wondering, like if I was
539
00:29:19.539 --> 00:29:21.180
doing something with my wife and I was like, you're
540
00:29:21.200 --> 00:29:25.059
like this. And she was like, no, I would be like, oh, man,
541
00:29:25.240 --> 00:29:27.680
that that was a I was a rod killer right there.
542
00:29:28.609 --> 00:29:33.960
But maybe I'm too sensitive. Is sometimes a safe word?
543
00:29:34.019 --> 00:29:36.380
Does it somewhat kill the mood? If you've ever been
544
00:29:36.400 --> 00:29:39.150
in the sadist role, I would say, I understand you
545
00:29:39.190 --> 00:29:41.039
respect it. You treat it good. But have you ever
546
00:29:41.079 --> 00:29:44.039
been like into it? And someone says the same. Well,
547
00:29:44.140 --> 00:29:46.819
I shouldn't have said butterfly. I should have said Oklahoma.
548
00:29:46.900 --> 00:29:50.329
We're about the same age. That's the jackass one. Um, yeah.
549
00:29:52.109 --> 00:29:53.970
Can it kill the mood a little bit? And I'm
550
00:29:55.250 --> 00:29:58.650
done prefacing this by, you know, making it clear that
551
00:29:58.710 --> 00:30:01.599
I am fine with safe words. But can it sometimes
552
00:30:01.660 --> 00:30:02.819
kill the mood a little bit?
553
00:30:03.480 --> 00:30:05.539
So I know this is going to sound like I'm
554
00:30:06.140 --> 00:30:08.759
a faker. I don't know what. But for me, no.
555
00:30:09.240 --> 00:30:15.559
And I personally believe... And so... I hesitate to say
556
00:30:15.579 --> 00:30:17.819
this because I don't want to throw shade on anyone.
557
00:30:18.140 --> 00:30:22.769
And I, I think that it's not possible to be
558
00:30:22.809 --> 00:30:27.170
a good dominant. Um, if someone's saying a safe word
559
00:30:27.190 --> 00:30:27.809
can kill the mood.
560
00:30:28.029 --> 00:30:28.230
Sure.
561
00:30:28.910 --> 00:30:35.720
Um, because, and in the sense that like, when you
562
00:30:35.799 --> 00:30:39.500
are the dominant, you are taking on responsibility for the
563
00:30:39.559 --> 00:30:43.509
experience of the submissive. So and it is true that
564
00:30:43.549 --> 00:30:47.289
it's their responsibility to be communicating. And like, that's still
565
00:30:48.099 --> 00:30:54.039
your responsibility. And so so, yeah, I when someone calls
566
00:30:54.119 --> 00:30:58.410
read my immediate responses, what happened? Like, how how can
567
00:30:58.450 --> 00:31:00.509
I help? Like, what support do you need right now?
568
00:31:01.349 --> 00:31:06.869
Because that. that, that piece of care, like I, I don't,
569
00:31:07.069 --> 00:31:09.690
I don't do this because I have to, like I
570
00:31:09.730 --> 00:31:11.950
do it because I love it. And I love the
571
00:31:11.990 --> 00:31:14.609
people that I do it with. Um, I genuinely do.
572
00:31:14.910 --> 00:31:18.410
And part of that is caring for them. Um, in
573
00:31:18.430 --> 00:31:22.089
those moments, those are the most vulnerable moments that a
574
00:31:22.089 --> 00:31:26.210
person can have. And especially for men, um, that I,
575
00:31:26.230 --> 00:31:31.700
I think that, Very few men are given the opportunity
576
00:31:32.200 --> 00:31:38.619
in our society to be their most vulnerable, most base
577
00:31:38.980 --> 00:31:41.099
self and be accepted for that.
578
00:31:42.589 --> 00:31:43.109
Yeah.
579
00:31:43.549 --> 00:31:46.690
And that is what I provide. I provide a safe
580
00:31:46.710 --> 00:31:47.349
space for that.
581
00:31:48.490 --> 00:31:51.410
I love what you said that it's almost part of
582
00:31:51.470 --> 00:31:55.509
the job of being a dom to give a shit
583
00:31:55.670 --> 00:31:59.009
about The safe words and this and that. Whereas if
584
00:31:59.029 --> 00:32:01.210
you if you had someone who was just in for
585
00:32:01.230 --> 00:32:03.670
the dom and, oh, this is what gets me off,
586
00:32:04.230 --> 00:32:07.279
then it might kill the mood and for them. But
587
00:32:07.359 --> 00:32:10.039
that's not a good dom then is what you're saying, right? Yeah.
588
00:32:10.359 --> 00:32:13.450
Yeah. And not to say that like feelings can't come
589
00:32:13.509 --> 00:32:16.630
up for a dominant as well. Cause that's certainly happened
590
00:32:16.650 --> 00:32:20.109
for me of like, Oh no, like I've, I've ruined things,
591
00:32:20.170 --> 00:32:23.150
you know, but it's, it is also your responsibility as
592
00:32:23.190 --> 00:32:26.009
a dumb to like deal with those yourself. Like that's,
593
00:32:26.069 --> 00:32:27.809
that's not something you put on the submission. You can
594
00:32:27.849 --> 00:32:30.730
talk about it afterwards, but like in the moment of
595
00:32:30.789 --> 00:32:34.549
like someone calling red, like it's, they're having a crisis
596
00:32:34.910 --> 00:32:37.839
of some kind. Even if it's a small one, like it's,
597
00:32:37.990 --> 00:32:39.779
it's very important to be attending to that.
598
00:32:41.700 --> 00:32:43.339
I want to talk about the in-person stuff, but I
599
00:32:43.400 --> 00:32:46.160
do have this question for you. When I see I
600
00:32:46.359 --> 00:32:49.099
do a lot of interviews, both with mainstream performers and
601
00:32:49.160 --> 00:32:52.869
newer girls coming into the industry, I see a lot
602
00:32:52.880 --> 00:32:55.930
of newer girls coming into the industry. And I don't
603
00:32:55.990 --> 00:32:57.869
take a lot of these interviews, if I'm being honest,
604
00:32:57.910 --> 00:33:00.369
because of the tenants I went back to earlier on.
605
00:33:00.829 --> 00:33:02.410
Are you in it for the long haul? Is this
606
00:33:02.450 --> 00:33:04.750
a career for you? This and that. A lot of
607
00:33:04.789 --> 00:33:07.190
them come in and the first thing they think they
608
00:33:07.230 --> 00:33:11.369
could do, which I just had a pretty famous dominatrix
609
00:33:11.410 --> 00:33:15.049
break it down for me the other day. The first
610
00:33:15.150 --> 00:33:18.289
thing they think they could do and just dip their
611
00:33:18.369 --> 00:33:21.210
toe and not have to show their tits or anything,
612
00:33:21.269 --> 00:33:23.730
maybe they go, oh, I'm just going to be a dom.
613
00:33:24.269 --> 00:33:27.250
I'll just be a fin dom. I'll be a online dom.
614
00:33:27.309 --> 00:33:30.319
I'll do this. I'll do that. And I don't think
615
00:33:30.359 --> 00:33:33.529
they understand the psychology at all.
616
00:33:33.589 --> 00:33:33.869
Right.
617
00:33:34.069 --> 00:33:35.069
The psychology behind it.
618
00:33:35.069 --> 00:33:36.289
So, no, of course not.
619
00:33:36.430 --> 00:33:38.910
Do you have any advice to newer girls coming into
620
00:33:38.930 --> 00:33:41.250
the industry? And again, if they want to get in
621
00:33:41.369 --> 00:33:44.029
or try to get in, they they should be more
622
00:33:44.069 --> 00:33:46.650
than welcome to at least attempt. But do you have
623
00:33:46.730 --> 00:33:52.690
any advice for girls coming into the industry who say
624
00:33:52.769 --> 00:33:54.250
right off the bat? Oh, I'm just going to do
625
00:33:54.589 --> 00:33:56.089
be a dom. I'm going to be a dom. I'll
626
00:33:56.130 --> 00:33:58.769
try and be a dom. Any advice for those people?
627
00:34:02.500 --> 00:34:06.049
The only real way to make money in this industry,
628
00:34:06.250 --> 00:34:13.329
in the sex industry in general, is to create something sustainable.
629
00:34:13.650 --> 00:34:18.139
And it is incredibly difficult. to sustain an entirely new
630
00:34:18.420 --> 00:34:22.880
and foreign persona. So if you want to succeed, the
631
00:34:23.039 --> 00:34:24.800
only way that you're gonna be able to do that
632
00:34:24.880 --> 00:34:29.670
is by being yourself. So if you are a dominant
633
00:34:29.730 --> 00:34:33.289
and you're interested in actually being a dominant, start attending
634
00:34:33.329 --> 00:34:37.969
kink munches. start consuming dominant content, like learn what it
635
00:34:38.150 --> 00:34:41.230
actually means to be a real dominant. And if you
636
00:34:41.250 --> 00:34:43.070
think if you're doing it just because you think it's
637
00:34:43.090 --> 00:34:45.159
going to make you more money, it's not like if
638
00:34:45.199 --> 00:34:47.239
you're actually more of a girl next door, then be
639
00:34:47.280 --> 00:34:50.260
a girl next door. Like lots of those women make
640
00:34:50.300 --> 00:34:54.420
a lot of money. Like it's, you know, it's, you're not,
641
00:34:54.599 --> 00:34:57.039
you're going to flame out and it's going to suck
642
00:34:57.900 --> 00:35:00.539
if you try to be someone that you're not. Yeah,
643
00:35:00.559 --> 00:35:01.039
that's the truth.
644
00:35:01.559 --> 00:35:05.159
I think they see it as the most hands off
645
00:35:05.280 --> 00:35:10.559
way from again, from the ignorant stigma outside perception, the
646
00:35:10.599 --> 00:35:14.389
most hands off way. And, you know, I'll start my O.F.
647
00:35:14.650 --> 00:35:16.929
and then, I don't know, two months in, I'll be
648
00:35:16.949 --> 00:35:20.760
making a hundred grand a month. And and then I'll
649
00:35:20.780 --> 00:35:23.960
parlay that into, you know, and I just I just
650
00:35:24.000 --> 00:35:26.659
don't think and I hope this episode teaches them a
651
00:35:26.719 --> 00:35:30.940
little bit in terms of what is required for the
652
00:35:31.440 --> 00:35:35.050
dom role in this industry. It is so much more
653
00:35:35.090 --> 00:35:38.170
advanced than do you like being mean to dudes? Yeah.
654
00:35:40.039 --> 00:35:43.280
give it a shot. You know, this is, this is
655
00:35:43.360 --> 00:35:46.260
more to me, this is more advanced than just porn
656
00:35:46.380 --> 00:35:50.230
than just gang bangs than anything. Like you're not, it,
657
00:35:51.130 --> 00:35:53.929
there's emotions in those two as well. Don't get me wrong,
658
00:35:54.409 --> 00:35:57.210
but it seems like what you're really concentrating on. This
659
00:35:57.510 --> 00:35:59.969
is less about the body and making sure their head
660
00:36:00.030 --> 00:36:02.519
is in the right space and their head is enjoying
661
00:36:02.579 --> 00:36:06.380
this and their mind is free and you're not causing
662
00:36:06.440 --> 00:36:09.550
any pain that they're not asking for. And, And then
663
00:36:09.570 --> 00:36:13.570
here's my next question. And then once you're done, once
664
00:36:13.670 --> 00:36:20.449
everybody got their nut. Talk to me about aftercare, because
665
00:36:20.630 --> 00:36:23.130
I like to mean the other day and my wife
666
00:36:23.150 --> 00:36:24.289
was like, why do you like that? I go, well,
667
00:36:24.309 --> 00:36:25.949
because I'm going to talk to a couple of doms
668
00:36:26.010 --> 00:36:28.030
and I want to bring this up. It just said,
669
00:36:28.090 --> 00:36:30.530
you know, six times in a row, it said aftercare
670
00:36:30.570 --> 00:36:34.139
is everything. Aftercare is everything. Aftercare is everything. What is
671
00:36:34.239 --> 00:36:39.889
aftercare and how do you approach that? Either I can
672
00:36:39.929 --> 00:36:44.110
understand it with Piggy having the aftercare because you're there
673
00:36:44.150 --> 00:36:46.250
with them, this and that. But what about in something
674
00:36:46.289 --> 00:36:49.010
that's more of a spur of the moment or planned,
675
00:36:49.110 --> 00:36:51.190
but not necessarily like we're going to sit on the
676
00:36:51.210 --> 00:36:54.190
couch afterwards and I'll I'll tell you how great you are.
677
00:36:54.670 --> 00:36:56.829
Talk to me about aftercare and talk to me about
678
00:36:56.869 --> 00:37:00.260
how you approach it if it's not necessarily with somebody
679
00:37:00.280 --> 00:37:01.320
you're with.
680
00:37:02.579 --> 00:37:08.369
Yes, so aftercare is basically the time after a scene
681
00:37:08.550 --> 00:37:13.809
where the dominant and the submissive are connecting over what happened.
682
00:37:14.070 --> 00:37:20.369
And aftercare is often focused on the sub, And a
683
00:37:20.409 --> 00:37:22.989
lot of times there's a good reason for that, like
684
00:37:23.010 --> 00:37:29.139
they've gone through something that's incredibly taxing physically. And sometimes
685
00:37:29.360 --> 00:37:33.079
in a very emotional scene, it can be a mutual thing.
686
00:37:34.300 --> 00:37:37.119
And so aftercare can look like lots of different things.
687
00:37:37.199 --> 00:37:41.820
It's basically helping the body reset, like come back to equilibrium.
688
00:37:42.800 --> 00:37:46.949
um so uh things like laying down um using blankets
689
00:37:47.449 --> 00:37:51.090
um uh sitting and talking about how things went um
690
00:37:51.210 --> 00:37:54.050
once you know like if they're non-verbal for some reason
691
00:37:54.110 --> 00:37:57.110
then uh like they're like i'm too i can't not
692
00:37:57.139 --> 00:38:00.679
yet you know uh you just sit with them and
693
00:38:00.940 --> 00:38:05.480
um especially for well either way actually just like reassuring
694
00:38:05.519 --> 00:38:07.400
them that they did a really good job you know
695
00:38:07.619 --> 00:38:10.840
um especially as the dominant like reassuring them that they
696
00:38:11.059 --> 00:38:13.719
did amazing, they did exactly what I wanted them to,
697
00:38:14.500 --> 00:38:21.679
that they did so well, and just positively reinforcing everything
698
00:38:21.719 --> 00:38:26.500
that happened in the session. And that's the first part
699
00:38:26.539 --> 00:38:31.119
of it, especially for me. And so even in a
700
00:38:31.159 --> 00:38:36.090
pickup scene at a dungeon or in a professional setting
701
00:38:36.289 --> 00:38:39.829
where I'm at an appointment with someone, Aftercare is essential.
702
00:38:40.030 --> 00:38:43.210
It's it's always something that I do, even if it's
703
00:38:43.250 --> 00:38:47.250
just and not everybody needs a ton of aftercare, especially
704
00:38:47.289 --> 00:38:49.969
like the more experienced someone is, the more they they
705
00:38:49.989 --> 00:38:52.070
get to a point of like, yeah, that was great. See,
706
00:38:53.110 --> 00:38:57.570
you know, and yeah, it's always something that I make
707
00:38:57.590 --> 00:39:00.750
sure I offer because you never know. If someone is
708
00:39:00.789 --> 00:39:03.989
having an especially fragile moment and it's it's it is
709
00:39:04.110 --> 00:39:06.449
part of that the same care, you know, that comes
710
00:39:06.489 --> 00:39:08.469
with the safe word is it's like at the end,
711
00:39:08.869 --> 00:39:12.469
no matter how mean they wanted me to be in
712
00:39:12.510 --> 00:39:17.480
the scene. Like the the aftercare part is like you're
713
00:39:17.659 --> 00:39:20.699
you're still a person like and I'm here for you.
714
00:39:20.739 --> 00:39:22.159
I'm holding you in this moment.
715
00:39:23.199 --> 00:39:28.949
Okay. Goddess Hecate dot com. H.E.C.A.T.E. You mentioned in person stuff.
716
00:39:30.010 --> 00:39:32.730
does in-person stuff come about do you have your own
717
00:39:32.789 --> 00:39:35.250
dungeon do you rent a dungeon how do you go
718
00:39:35.289 --> 00:39:40.460
about renting a dungeon uh how what do people generally
719
00:39:40.579 --> 00:39:44.750
want is there a Do you start them slow? Like,
720
00:39:44.849 --> 00:39:50.010
we are only doing needles this week. I love that
721
00:39:50.030 --> 00:39:54.280
you were like, needles are slow. Yeah, look. I'm mad
722
00:39:54.940 --> 00:39:59.500
after my own heart. After we answer the in-person question here,
723
00:39:59.760 --> 00:40:02.340
I do want to go to something I find horrific
724
00:40:02.539 --> 00:40:05.130
and terrible and should never be done and probably outlawed
725
00:40:05.190 --> 00:40:08.820
in all 50 states, but... Talk to me about in person.
726
00:40:08.880 --> 00:40:11.860
How did that come about? How did you decide you
727
00:40:11.900 --> 00:40:16.559
were ready for that step? Because, you know, there's a
728
00:40:16.599 --> 00:40:19.969
difference between meeting someone and interacting with someone, deciding you're
729
00:40:19.989 --> 00:40:23.929
going to do this, understanding their layout, what they're looking for.
730
00:40:24.130 --> 00:40:26.489
And then there's another one where, hey, I'm coming in
731
00:40:26.530 --> 00:40:30.059
Tuesday at three. What do you got? How do you
732
00:40:30.179 --> 00:40:31.119
how do you go about that?
733
00:40:31.800 --> 00:40:35.030
OK. So I do not have my own space yet.
734
00:40:35.659 --> 00:40:40.579
That is a goal of mine. And for now, there's actually...
735
00:40:40.780 --> 00:40:44.360
So I'm in Orange County. Excuse me. And there's a
736
00:40:44.440 --> 00:40:49.239
new dungeon here called SoCal BDSM. That's fantastic. If you're
737
00:40:49.260 --> 00:40:51.260
in the Orange County area, I think it's the only
738
00:40:51.400 --> 00:40:53.969
one in Orange County. All the rest of them are
739
00:40:54.010 --> 00:40:56.929
in LA. There's a Shibari Dojo in Long Beach that's
740
00:40:56.989 --> 00:41:00.389
really awesome. But they only do Shibari, which is the
741
00:41:00.489 --> 00:41:04.849
artistic rope tying. Yep. Um, and then, um, but like
742
00:41:04.929 --> 00:41:06.860
all the rest of them are either in San Diego
743
00:41:06.929 --> 00:41:10.340
or LA. Um, so I, I do also rent rooms
744
00:41:10.400 --> 00:41:13.659
at other dungeons, um, depending on where someone is, um,
745
00:41:13.840 --> 00:41:16.000
and depending on the person. Um, so I have a
746
00:41:16.059 --> 00:41:20.880
pretty strict screening process. Um, and, uh, if I feel
747
00:41:20.920 --> 00:41:24.460
like it's something that I'm, um, okay with, I will
748
00:41:24.480 --> 00:41:27.590
occasionally rent hotel rooms with someone as well. They'd prefer that.
749
00:41:28.050 --> 00:41:30.789
And I have also done house calls, but that takes time.
750
00:41:31.110 --> 00:41:31.809
A lot of trust.
751
00:41:32.050 --> 00:41:35.989
Okay, sure, sure. That's like somebody you've seen before that's like,
752
00:41:36.010 --> 00:41:38.809
I need this today. Yes, seen multiple times. Gotcha, gotcha. Okay,
753
00:41:39.070 --> 00:41:42.710
all right. And then the process, I mean, during your
754
00:41:42.730 --> 00:41:45.929
screening process, are you seeing exactly what they're looking for?
755
00:41:46.610 --> 00:41:49.130
And again, with something like this, where there could be
756
00:41:49.769 --> 00:41:53.090
pain or injury or this and that, how detailed is
757
00:41:53.150 --> 00:41:57.090
the breakdown that you want? Like, again, if they say needles,
758
00:41:57.150 --> 00:41:58.389
are you going like, how many? Or....
759
00:42:00.760 --> 00:42:04.039
So, um, I have an, a booking inquiry form on
760
00:42:04.059 --> 00:42:07.159
my website. Um, so if you, if you go to,
761
00:42:07.179 --> 00:42:09.780
I think it's book goddess Hecate on my website, um,
762
00:42:09.880 --> 00:42:13.579
there's an inquiry form to fill out and it is very,
763
00:42:13.639 --> 00:42:17.920
very detailed. Um, it's like, uh, name, everything that you're
764
00:42:17.940 --> 00:42:20.019
interested in. It's a whole bunch of things that you
765
00:42:20.059 --> 00:42:23.050
can click of different things that I offer. Um, there's also,
766
00:42:23.070 --> 00:42:25.329
you know, you can write on your own. Um, and
767
00:42:25.369 --> 00:42:28.349
then I require, um, a picture of their idea and
768
00:42:28.369 --> 00:42:32.750
then a photo of them whole their ID. And so
769
00:42:32.809 --> 00:42:36.829
that also includes that inquiry form includes hard limits, which
770
00:42:36.889 --> 00:42:40.239
are things that they will never do. And I also
771
00:42:40.360 --> 00:42:46.519
ask about injuries or medications or anything like that, that
772
00:42:46.539 --> 00:42:49.159
might affect the session.
773
00:42:49.900 --> 00:42:52.820
What's a medication you would worry about? High blood pressure meds?
774
00:42:53.889 --> 00:42:56.469
Blood pressure meds, if someone was going to want to
775
00:42:56.510 --> 00:43:01.010
be mummified or tightly bound, is something that I would
776
00:43:01.110 --> 00:43:05.639
take caution on. It's a lot more about making sure
777
00:43:05.679 --> 00:43:11.619
that someone is not impaired. I don't allow people to
778
00:43:11.800 --> 00:43:17.539
take drugs when they see me. If they're taking a
779
00:43:17.559 --> 00:43:21.400
medication that does cause some kind of impairment, then that's
780
00:43:21.440 --> 00:43:24.449
something that I might need to refuse service, depending on
781
00:43:24.469 --> 00:43:26.090
what it is and how often they need to take it.
782
00:43:26.219 --> 00:43:29.849
Because that's... You need to be lucid to be able
783
00:43:29.889 --> 00:43:32.210
to tell me if things are still going well.
784
00:43:32.230 --> 00:43:36.989
Sure, sure. Mike, not a question, it's a statement. This
785
00:43:37.010 --> 00:43:40.070
should be banned across all 50 states. Can you guess
786
00:43:40.769 --> 00:43:45.250
the thing within this realm that me, as a cis-normal
787
00:43:45.329 --> 00:43:45.949
white guy, goes.
788
00:43:47.610 --> 00:43:49.650
No, no, no, no, no. We can't have that. Can
789
00:43:49.690 --> 00:43:58.010
you guess what it is? No. Sounding. Terrifying. It's terrifying.
790
00:43:58.050 --> 00:44:01.510
It should be outlawed. Mr. President, where are you? Whoever
791
00:44:01.550 --> 00:44:07.800
it is, outlaw it. Have you ever done sounding on somebody?
792
00:44:07.820 --> 00:44:10.739
Yes. I use enthusiastic credit.
793
00:44:11.059 --> 00:44:12.659
I'm slow.
794
00:44:12.719 --> 00:44:14.119
We've done it multiple times.
795
00:44:14.139 --> 00:44:15.300
I mean, a lot.
796
00:44:15.360 --> 00:44:18.050
We've done it a lot of times. It's one of
797
00:44:18.070 --> 00:44:23.090
the semi-regular things. We have videos of sounding as well. Sure.
798
00:44:23.110 --> 00:44:27.030
So sounding is different for different people. Some people enjoy
799
00:44:27.050 --> 00:44:31.949
the stretch of getting progressively bigger and bigger sounds. Some
800
00:44:31.969 --> 00:44:35.530
people like being fucked by them, like in and out.
801
00:44:37.110 --> 00:44:40.219
Piggy tends to prefer to have it go in and
802
00:44:40.280 --> 00:44:42.300
then be jerked off while it's in there.
803
00:44:42.960 --> 00:44:43.760
Oh, no!
804
00:44:43.780 --> 00:44:45.139
Yeah. What?
805
00:44:45.679 --> 00:44:51.079
I said, oh, no. Let me ask.
806
00:44:51.400 --> 00:44:53.909
So you've never tried to get out of here?
807
00:44:54.050 --> 00:44:59.489
No. Let me ask this. Because one, my luck, I
808
00:44:59.550 --> 00:45:05.480
would injure myself so badly to. Well, let me ask this,
809
00:45:05.539 --> 00:45:09.530
because the next terrifying part of this is. Piggy, does
810
00:45:09.590 --> 00:45:15.280
he like, are all sounding rods metal? Because I swear
811
00:45:15.300 --> 00:45:18.699
to you, I've seen glass ones before, and that's terrifying
812
00:45:18.719 --> 00:45:19.119
to me.
813
00:45:19.280 --> 00:45:23.059
Some of them are glass, but they're borosilicate glass, which
814
00:45:23.380 --> 00:45:27.179
is a little bit less likely to, I mean, they
815
00:45:27.199 --> 00:45:29.769
should be borosilicate glass. I'm sure they sell cheap ones,
816
00:45:29.849 --> 00:45:33.579
but please, God, don't buy cheap sounds. It's going in
817
00:45:33.619 --> 00:45:35.639
a place that you should not. You should not.
818
00:45:35.920 --> 00:45:40.179
Okay. But again, I can break a thing, a Pyrex.
819
00:45:40.480 --> 00:45:42.820
So that glass is one thing. So if it was
820
00:45:42.900 --> 00:45:43.119
in there.
821
00:45:43.199 --> 00:45:45.340
I wouldn't use a glass one. I have metal ones.
822
00:45:45.360 --> 00:45:45.639
Yeah.
823
00:45:45.699 --> 00:45:46.679
I have a set of metal ones.
824
00:45:47.780 --> 00:45:50.800
And they're rounded, right? There's no sharp edges or anything?
825
00:45:50.889 --> 00:45:51.969
No, no sharp edges.
826
00:45:54.489 --> 00:45:57.070
Okay. All right. Well, good for Piggy. He's more of
827
00:45:57.110 --> 00:46:00.610
a man than me, apparently. And that's acceptable. I agree
828
00:46:00.630 --> 00:46:00.949
with that.
829
00:46:02.119 --> 00:46:04.699
I mean, you know, yes, you're allowed to like what
830
00:46:04.739 --> 00:46:05.039
you like.
831
00:46:05.760 --> 00:46:08.780
I my thing is, as long as there's no kids
832
00:46:08.840 --> 00:46:10.639
or dogs in the room, I don't give a shit
833
00:46:10.659 --> 00:46:13.380
what people are doing. Go ahead. As long as everyone's
834
00:46:13.440 --> 00:46:14.099
in on it.
835
00:46:14.280 --> 00:46:17.920
You're consenting adults. All right.
836
00:46:18.320 --> 00:46:20.519
Well, let me ask you kind of the last question.
837
00:46:20.659 --> 00:46:24.349
Where do we go from here? Do you want to
838
00:46:24.489 --> 00:46:28.090
continue doing what you do? You've shot with some you
839
00:46:28.110 --> 00:46:31.800
shot with Rome major. I know. So like. you are
840
00:46:31.840 --> 00:46:35.539
capable of shooting these scenes. Is it a desire to
841
00:46:35.820 --> 00:46:37.590
jump in and do some mainstream stuff?
842
00:46:37.949 --> 00:46:41.070
Yes, I would love to do more mainstream. You know,
843
00:46:41.150 --> 00:46:44.449
I'm 40, so a little old to be getting into
844
00:46:44.489 --> 00:46:47.730
the industry, but I would still love to shoot more.
845
00:46:48.289 --> 00:46:53.059
I had so much fun with Rome. He, okay, he
846
00:46:53.159 --> 00:46:57.940
is like one of the nicest people, seriously. Like, I
847
00:46:58.179 --> 00:47:00.159
don't want to like ruin his reputation or anything like that.
848
00:47:01.269 --> 00:47:04.429
He was so helpful when we shot those scenes like
849
00:47:04.449 --> 00:47:06.329
he was he was awesome.
850
00:47:06.869 --> 00:47:11.829
You know what? There's obviously bad people in the industry
851
00:47:11.889 --> 00:47:14.409
and you'll see it on Twitter every few months. Someone.
852
00:47:14.969 --> 00:47:20.369
But I am so impressed with how the sex sex worker,
853
00:47:20.550 --> 00:47:24.190
whatever you want to say, it is community almost seems like.
854
00:47:25.199 --> 00:47:28.559
Like you see shows and whatever where strippers are in
855
00:47:28.579 --> 00:47:30.559
the back and they're going at each other's throat and
856
00:47:30.579 --> 00:47:32.630
they hate each other and they're this and that. I
857
00:47:32.889 --> 00:47:36.349
never hear or see that in the porn industry unless
858
00:47:36.409 --> 00:47:40.219
someone does something horrific and then everyone jumps on and
859
00:47:40.260 --> 00:47:44.019
defends the girls and everything else. It just seems like.
860
00:47:44.849 --> 00:47:47.349
I've been talking about the outside view of things a
861
00:47:47.409 --> 00:47:50.969
lot lately in my interviews and how the outside view is, oh,
862
00:47:51.489 --> 00:47:53.909
you're just some girl who doesn't want to go get
863
00:47:53.949 --> 00:47:57.190
a real job. No, you're doing editing. You're doing social
864
00:47:57.230 --> 00:48:00.389
media managing. You're doing admin work. You're doing this. You're
865
00:48:00.409 --> 00:48:05.050
doing that. You're running an actual business. And some of
866
00:48:05.070 --> 00:48:07.699
these performers get to the point where their revenue every
867
00:48:07.739 --> 00:48:11.019
month is bigger than any fucking business you'll find in
868
00:48:11.059 --> 00:48:14.570
your neighborhood. You know, any mom and pop shop, right? Yeah.
869
00:48:14.949 --> 00:48:18.869
So I just am always very impressed with how you
870
00:48:18.909 --> 00:48:22.670
girls don't get catty performers, females, whatever term you'd like
871
00:48:22.690 --> 00:48:24.920
to use. I apologize. I said chicks earlier and I
872
00:48:24.920 --> 00:48:26.699
was like, well, that's not what you say to a dom.
873
00:48:28.000 --> 00:48:33.559
But but I'm just always impressed at how. The outside
874
00:48:33.619 --> 00:48:37.929
perception is. And again, not me. The outside perception is, well,
875
00:48:37.989 --> 00:48:40.389
those people are all a mess. They're all crazy. They
876
00:48:40.409 --> 00:48:42.369
don't know what they're doing. Now, let me go sit
877
00:48:42.409 --> 00:48:44.860
in my fucking cubicle for eight hours and spend an
878
00:48:44.900 --> 00:48:47.300
hour driving home to make 40 grand a year, you know? Right.
879
00:48:49.960 --> 00:48:52.179
So I just I am very impressed with that. And
880
00:48:53.159 --> 00:48:56.659
I am very impressed with your commitment to doing this
881
00:48:56.780 --> 00:49:00.820
the right way, because it feels like so many people
882
00:49:01.679 --> 00:49:05.019
just kind of freewheel it. Just it seems like a
883
00:49:05.059 --> 00:49:07.050
lot of people look at it like I would look
884
00:49:07.090 --> 00:49:09.489
at it if I start it tomorrow. I would go like,
885
00:49:09.570 --> 00:49:12.570
all right, my job is to poker with needles and
886
00:49:12.590 --> 00:49:15.579
then I'd poker with a bunch of needles. And then,
887
00:49:16.280 --> 00:49:18.440
you know, if she says stop, I would go, OK,
888
00:49:18.500 --> 00:49:20.579
I'll stop now. When am I supposed to continue with
889
00:49:20.619 --> 00:49:27.230
the needles? I don't take direction well, but but yes,
890
00:49:27.429 --> 00:49:29.849
I very much appreciate you and I very much appreciate
891
00:49:29.909 --> 00:49:34.039
performers who. Make it a major part of their life,
892
00:49:34.340 --> 00:49:38.199
not just because I appreciate they put out content and
893
00:49:38.239 --> 00:49:40.030
they put out things for all of us to enjoy.
894
00:49:40.659 --> 00:49:44.949
But anyone who chases their dream and gets to it
895
00:49:45.030 --> 00:49:47.989
should be looked at as, you know, a success story.
896
00:49:48.190 --> 00:49:51.199
Whatever your dream is, if you get there. Right. Does
897
00:49:51.219 --> 00:49:51.760
that make sense?
898
00:49:52.239 --> 00:49:53.099
It does. Yeah.
899
00:49:54.349 --> 00:49:54.969
God willing.
900
00:49:54.989 --> 00:50:00.409
Thank you. Yeah. So my, my goal ultimately is to, um, I,
901
00:50:00.780 --> 00:50:02.699
I do want to explore more adult work. I'd love
902
00:50:02.719 --> 00:50:06.449
to get into the adult industry and, um, Piggy and
903
00:50:06.469 --> 00:50:11.030
I would really like to get into education, set up
904
00:50:11.090 --> 00:50:16.730
our own dungeon space. And even so, I have a
905
00:50:16.769 --> 00:50:20.480
little bit of carpentry experience myself, and I want to start.
906
00:50:20.960 --> 00:50:23.639
I would love to also take some welding classes because
907
00:50:23.659 --> 00:50:25.420
I want to start making my own kink furniture.
908
00:50:26.159 --> 00:50:27.110
So very cool.
909
00:50:27.119 --> 00:50:30.329
It's like very multifaceted. But yeah, there's I mean, this
910
00:50:30.369 --> 00:50:34.090
is my my life's passion, you know, is something that
911
00:50:34.139 --> 00:50:36.800
I really want to spread awareness of and teach people
912
00:50:36.860 --> 00:50:39.099
how to do ethically and responsibly.
913
00:50:41.150 --> 00:50:43.590
Goddess Hecate Reigns. You can find her on Twitter and
914
00:50:43.650 --> 00:50:51.820
loyal fans at Hecate Reigns. H-E-C-A-T-E Reigns. R-E-I-G-N-S. Or you
915
00:50:51.840 --> 00:50:55.940
can go to goddesshecate.com to get links to everything and
916
00:50:56.559 --> 00:51:00.320
to potentially, you know, hey, I'm in the area. Here's
917
00:51:00.360 --> 00:51:02.539
a picture of my ID. You got any needles?
918
00:51:03.980 --> 00:51:05.619
I keep going back to needles.
919
00:51:09.610 --> 00:51:11.969
Goddess Hecate Reigns. Hecate, thank you so much.