TENTANG EPISODE INI
Binny wandered throughout the city aimlessly while assuming that the city was going to heal him in some mystically cinematic way and thus he wouldn't have to think about this pain anymore, for it would absolve itself into a beautiful realisation about life and he would continue his life from a new edge without confronting his broken feelings.
That's how he coped with his anxiety, by literally manipulating it into believing that...
a) HE WAS FINE.
b) HE IS FINE.
c) HE WILL BE FINE.
Binny believed in gaslighting himself because it gave him a sense of control over his feelings. He was aware how f*cked up he was, because he was the one orchestrating his own emotional decline. Randomly coming to a new city just to roam around in it aimlessly and meet new people...that was just part of his grand plan of sabotaging his self-growth by being impulsive and reckless in a new way with new people only to realize at the end of this trip that...he is just tired of trying to get better.
Binny wandered throughout the city aimlessly while assuming that the city was going to heal him in some mystically cinematic way and thus he wouldn't have to think about this pain anymore, for it would absolve itself into a beautiful realisation about life and he would continue his life from a newlf. He will go to another city to meet more new people only to convince himself that he hasn't given up on himself, but the bitter truth about Binny's existence is that...
.
.
.
"...that he has drowned in his own sadness and it's just his dead body floating over the sea of his own sadness that looks alive because there's a smile on his face and from a distance, people who do not care enough to swim to him to check if he is alright or not, they always assume he is happy."
.
.
.
Binny is happy. He is happy being unhappy in different cities and he plans to get more lost until he loses his sh*t and finally ends it all :)
Movie Recco: Decision to Leave
Book Recco: Existential Kink
That's how he coped with his anxiety, by literally manipulating it into believing that...
a) HE WAS FINE.
b) HE IS FINE.
c) HE WILL BE FINE.
Binny believed in gaslighting himself because it gave him a sense of control over his feelings. He was aware how f*cked up he was, because he was the one orchestrating his own emotional decline. Randomly coming to a new city just to roam around in it aimlessly and meet new people...that was just part of his grand plan of sabotaging his self-growth by being impulsive and reckless in a new way with new people only to realize at the end of this trip that...he is just tired of trying to get better.
Binny wandered throughout the city aimlessly while assuming that the city was going to heal him in some mystically cinematic way and thus he wouldn't have to think about this pain anymore, for it would absolve itself into a beautiful realisation about life and he would continue his life from a newlf. He will go to another city to meet more new people only to convince himself that he hasn't given up on himself, but the bitter truth about Binny's existence is that...
.
.
.
"...that he has drowned in his own sadness and it's just his dead body floating over the sea of his own sadness that looks alive because there's a smile on his face and from a distance, people who do not care enough to swim to him to check if he is alright or not, they always assume he is happy."
.
.
.
Binny is happy. He is happy being unhappy in different cities and he plans to get more lost until he loses his sh*t and finally ends it all :)
Movie Recco: Decision to Leave
Book Recco: Existential Kink
Inggris
Amerika Serikat
DALAM EPISODE INI
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CARI EPISODE TERDAHULU
Cari episode sebelumnya dari Binny’s Bizarre Adventures.
EPISODE LAIN DALAM PODCAST INI
To lose someone your love is to alter your life forever.
Movie Recco: Demolition 2015
Song Recco: Beloved By Mumford & Sons
my name is binny and i'm 27. there's so much i can say, it always feels like i'm up to my throat with words. like i'm some thoughts-body. life is full. life is beautiful. life is here. it's now. and in this same breath, i want to say i don't know what the future looks like. sometimes i feel as if y…
You're not in love, you're just experiencing the lack of love in the form of someone's momentarv abundance in your life, and this person might not even be consciously aware about the passion of your affection for their beautiful ignorance and you being a "self-aware creature of your doomed circumst…
Sanggahan: Podcast dan karya seni yang disematkan pada halaman ini berasal dari Binny’s Bizarre Adventures, yang merupakan milik pemiliknya dan tidak berafiliasi atau didukung oleh Listen Notes, Inc.
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