WEBVTT
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I don't know. I'll never get used to this video
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camera thing. It It used to be inside the computer,
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and now what seems to be the case is it
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seems to be on top of the computer with a
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long cord that you can trip yourself on, which I've
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done and continue to do and will continue to do
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through the end of time. And that's okay, and that's fine.
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But to have had the incidents I've had with the internet,
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you know, shoddy production types of instruments, misheld, misused. I
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let my son use his friends as the production universe.
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It just it just there was no there was no
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particular rhyme or reason to it. Yet here I am
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Dave stuck in the middle of it, and I think
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that's a song. And I don't know for sure, but
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I do believe. I do believe. I do believe that's
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that's a song. Uh So, so what we're doing here
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is it's basically stalling for time. We've begun the show.
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The show's started in full effect. And uh we are
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we are a particular we are a particular nation. We're
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a particular set of individuals with principles and and so
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on and so forth. But when we get in front
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of the video camera. We're just mush, We're just We're
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just cannon fodder. We're just We're just We're just a
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guy with half a foot and half a sandwich and
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and not a prayer in hell. There's just nothing he
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can do about it. So I want to give a prayer.
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I want to give solitude. I want to give gratefulness.
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I want to give all those things. And I am
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just honored and tickled to death to be the first
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a guest on this show who I will now interview,
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and I believe he's gonna interview me. I don't know
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exactly I got here late, so let's bring him on.
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My first guest was a WWF wrestler for years, he
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retired and he is now a controversial individual in terms
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of the slim Gym nation and those who are continuing
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on his preservation. Please please welcome mister Randy macho man, savage,
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nice going.
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Very nice to meet you. Yeah, David Litterman, uh huh,
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the original champion of Late Night. I ain't talking about Corson,
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I'm not talking about Jack poloriah. You gotta go back
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to Indiana to get the best of the best, the
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cream of the crop David Litterman. Yeah, Jay Leno was
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your whole Cogan. Uh could have been a mega power
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situation and instead it's a Ristlemania five situation. Yeah.
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How you listen after that expose? I just feel like
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cuddling with a kitten, and I don't know which kitten,
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and I don't care.
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The left field? Yeah, why I love you?
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Do you have? By the way, I should ask where
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are the bagpipes?
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You're thinking of a different man. You're thinking of rowdy
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rowdy piper. Yeah, a man that I've met in the
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squared circle several times. Uhhhh, a titan of the industry,
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but not me. He's not the macho being reading these savage.
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And what what makes Randy the macho man?
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Is it?
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Is it for the mere fact that you are, uh
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a macho or is it something beyond that?
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Yeah? Like everything great, you gotta start with the foundation. Ah,
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I'm talking about a foundation of greatness. Yeah, and my
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foundation is being macho. My foundation is being a man. Yeah.
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What I've built from that, uh huh reaches to the sky.
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Dig it.
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And dig it means what should should I should I
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go dig something?
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Uh? It's a positive affirmation it's a way of agreeing.
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It's a way of going along with the beat of
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the band. And the beat goes on, and the beat
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goes on.
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And how about your hair? And by the way, are
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you dead or not? I don't know. I don't know
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if I'm dead.
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I'm in the astral place. Yeah, I'm in a place
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between heaven and hell. Yeah, between the top and the bottom.
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I'm not on the lid on the plane of the living,
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and instead I'm on a different thing, a different cellular mechanism. Yeah,
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I'm talking about a different part of existence. Yeah, that's
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where the macho man is and where he is always been. Ah,
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And what.
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Do you do with your days? I would guess tea
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and a top side pool is not part of it?
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Or are do you stretch?
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What type of There's a lot of uh, a lot
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of different things going to be in the macho me.
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Watch you're your diet, making sure your body is in
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an excellence and also a lot of jeneromi. Yeah.
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And I hate to keep asking questions because I'm already
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asking questions. But what the hell, what the hell are
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you talking about? It just doesn't make any sense. It
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doesn't make any damn sense I don't get it.
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You gotta find the middle of the maze. You gotta
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get lost. Uh huh. I'm talking about a compass with
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no direction. Yeah, I'm thinking up us down and left
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is right, Yeah, every which way bought up. Yeah, that
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is my favorite Richard Pryor movie.
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Richard was a guest on my show several times, and
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I remember I remember looking at Richard and thinking, God,
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this guy probably smells pretty good, but I can't get
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close enough to find out. Have you been around people,
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specifically the the WWF wrestlers that have been kind of
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have an odor or maybe one of them smells pretty good.
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A lot of big men in the ww LEFT, Yeah,
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a lot of my competition the size of big men. Yeah,
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and they smell like big men. Yeah. It's like if
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you put ham in gasoline. I'm talking about raw meat,
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meat with fuel. Yeah, that's the combination. That's the aroma.
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That's steroids.
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Hold on, hold on a second, backup.
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I'm talking sand with you.
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You're talking I'm talking you're talking capricola.
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I'm talking black forest Ham. I'm talking about every single
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warhead flavor.
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Yeah, okay, so so black forest, but there's other varieties
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of ham. I assume I used to do a canned ham.
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I don't know if you remember that, but we would.
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You're not talking about actual pig products. Yeah, you're talking
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about scientific meat. Yeah, you're talking about the meat that's
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made in a lab. I'm talking about spam and not
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the email. I'm talking about the food out of a can. Yeah,
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ain't real, never been real. Dig it.
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That's just that's just fantastic and that and that. That's
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a particular set of gestures I would hope from somebody
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like you, because you had a long run with the
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slim gem thing. How many slim gems do you think
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you have? Put down your gullet?
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A little bit of an industry secret. Yeah, an industry
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secret is you take the bite, but you never swallow. Yeah,
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you don't let the poison into your body. Uh huh.
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Slim Gym gave me a lot of money, but never
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did I eat one. Never once did I take a
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slim Gym into my stomach. Ah.
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And because for what various reason? Is there a various reason.
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It's not made of meat? Yeah, it's people. I'm talking
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about people from below the southern hemisphere, people without social
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Security numbers, disappearing and then becoming flavored beef. Yeah.
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So these people die and I don't know how they die,
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but they do, in fact die. There's not living people
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in Slide and Slide the slim gems see what I'm doing.
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I love it. I love the little wordplay.
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But how do they get these people? I mean, they
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don't necessarily volunteer their bodies to the slim gym factory?
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Do they industry secret a lot of creed or a
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lot of grieve Robin. Yeah, coming into where you're laid
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to rest, they pop you out and see if you
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still got meat on your bones.
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Yeah, Well that's just something. Isn't that just something? But
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it's just it's wonderful, wonderful, wonderful to have you on
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the show, and it's just it's it's extra special that
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it could be here over the internet as impersonal as possible.
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Through the greatness of the Internet.
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So let's uh, We're gonna go to the next thing.
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The next thing is uh, jeez, I'm all over the place.
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This is weird. I feel weird. Okay, I think you
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knew who I am. If you didn't know who I am,
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watch the movies RoboCop, No just kidding. I'm iron Man. Thanks.
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I feel good. I'm like I dance around. You would
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think I was something else, but I'm not. I have
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a wife. So with me, there's with me today is
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this is This is the kind of algorithm you can
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get into and then you don't really know what you're doing.
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And that's why I make my eyes go up towards
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the sailing because I have to tinkle. And it's not
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it's not necessarily true. I forgot what your name is.
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I feel so bad.
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Well, miho. People call me a lot of things, but
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well the ones they always call me is never late
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for dinner. No, you can call me sam. My name
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is Samuel Elliott. Surprisingly, I'm from Portland, Oregon. Not a
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lot of people know that. They think I'm from the
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hills of Colorado or a storm dusted mountain in Montana.
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Well, you sound like storm drain. And also you're lighting.
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I don't know if you're trying to do a silhouette
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picture for like a Calvin kleinad, but you are doing
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If we could change the lighting, and I know this
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is in real time, but it's just could we change
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the lighting? Can we change your lighting?
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Well, I didn't know this was such a visually important thing, man,
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And I don't really know if I can here. Let
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me see if my friend old blinds can come down.
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The thing about blinds is they can block out the
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sun and they can make it the lighting a whole lot.
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Well, Sam, Sam, that's actually that's not bad. I like
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the lighting, but I do It's okay. I think that
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could work.
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I would say, Oh, it's going to be your only option.
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Brother, I'm deep faking this and I'm a defic artist
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and I'm doing the deficive. The thing is to take
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the microphone and just go a little below your chin.
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Oh that's perfect. She Now, from from now on we
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can definke it. But I love I didn't even.
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I want to apologize for not knowing the reason your
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questions where you were going. I'm a little older now,
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I don't really have grasp of time and really what's
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going on. So I didn't know what you were doing.
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I thought you were trying to sell me gold like
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the television's been doing for the last fifteen years every
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time I'm up late, damn, trying to buy them gold
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with an American ego on it, maybe even a buffalo
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from the wild West. What do you know?
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What do you attribute your speech to? Because when I
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listen to you, I would think there's something in your
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mouth other than your tongue.
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I usually have a bit out six to seven worthers originals,
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packing out my gums to make sure that the taste
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of caramel is never not in my mouth. Also, I've
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had a series of many strokes that everyone thought was
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a cowboy way of life, but really it was a
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brain lack of blood and oxygen for over fifteen minutes
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real time. And you get voiceover work, Well, a lot
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of that is them sneaking into the home that I
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live in and telling me that if I talk to
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my son about this product that he'll get me out.
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So I don't really know. I'm not trying to sell
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nothing as much as I am trying to be reunited
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with my family.
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And just for the record, you didn't just wake up.
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This is how you sound you. What do you sound
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like when you wake up?
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Well, it's usually more of a low rumble, kind of
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like the earth is moving below you. A lot of times,
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my Filipino nurse will wake me up by saying mister Elliott,
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mister e as she calls me it's time for your medicine,
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and at that point of the day, my voice is
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just and it takes her. I've been told I sound
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like a sleepy digery do. I've been told that I
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sound nothing like a human being.
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Okay, let's stop at didgerido. I don't know. Is that
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a donut shop? What is that? What is that is that?
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In like Stockton, California.
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Oh, there's a lot to learn in this world, especially
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the world of music. And well, miho, A dijury do
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is like if you took a flute and made it
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a man. If you took a flute and said, I
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don't need you peeing, sitting down, stand up, shake yourself
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when you're and leaves your body, that's a didgery do.
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Okay, still very confused. Didn't even get close to what
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a did we do is? And what does a did
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we do?
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Well, I'll tell you what a digitary don't, and it does.
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Digital don't deal with bullshit. It doesn't suffer fools. That's
241
00:14:20.759 --> 00:14:24.000
what I like about a digitally do. Let me ask
242
00:14:24.039 --> 00:14:28.399
you a question, mister Tony Stark, how much are you
243
00:14:28.639 --> 00:14:32.480
made of iron? Well?
244
00:14:32.559 --> 00:14:35.159
Right now, almost nothing, because I have my Jammy's on.
245
00:14:36.360 --> 00:14:40.080
But so if you're not in the suit, you're no iron.
246
00:14:40.200 --> 00:14:42.639
If I'm not in the suit, I'm like Darth Vader's face.
247
00:14:43.919 --> 00:14:48.039
Yeah, I knew a girl who had a face like
248
00:14:48.120 --> 00:14:51.120
Darth Vader. It was a different time and we were
249
00:14:51.159 --> 00:14:54.360
out in the West. She had a face that looked
250
00:14:54.399 --> 00:14:56.960
like it had fallen off a car and hit every
251
00:14:57.080 --> 00:15:00.200
piece of road and gravel on the way out out.
252
00:15:01.200 --> 00:15:04.720
She was an ugly woman, but a fair woman. I
253
00:15:04.799 --> 00:15:07.039
respected her. I miss her.
254
00:15:07.759 --> 00:15:10.080
What happened to her?
255
00:15:10.639 --> 00:15:13.799
I think she moved to Sacramento, she got transfer. She
256
00:15:13.919 --> 00:15:17.399
worked in insurance and they move around a lot. She
257
00:15:17.559 --> 00:15:19.639
was still a hideous woman.
258
00:15:19.919 --> 00:15:20.320
Hideous.
259
00:15:20.360 --> 00:15:20.519
You know.
260
00:15:20.559 --> 00:15:22.600
It's like some people look better when they get older.
261
00:15:24.600 --> 00:15:28.039
But you know, I think the the basic like makeup
262
00:15:28.080 --> 00:15:29.960
routine or if you're going to use a scrub or
263
00:15:29.960 --> 00:15:33.600
like facial cleanser, is to go facial cleanser every other day,
264
00:15:33.759 --> 00:15:37.159
scrub every day, moisturizer every third day.
265
00:15:38.279 --> 00:15:42.360
I like, how much you know about keeping your face clean.
266
00:15:42.559 --> 00:15:45.840
That's a man that cares about how he's perceived, and
267
00:15:45.919 --> 00:15:48.279
that's the first step into getting to know him someone.
268
00:15:48.320 --> 00:15:49.799
And I like that you do that.
269
00:15:50.519 --> 00:15:54.039
Well, it's it's it's sort of reminiscent of that. I
270
00:15:54.039 --> 00:15:55.600
don't know if you've seen it on TV. They've got
271
00:15:55.600 --> 00:15:58.799
the the fix. You can fix your tire. You could
272
00:15:58.840 --> 00:16:01.320
fix it on even on the even the spectrum.
273
00:16:02.360 --> 00:16:04.919
I love a fix. I love a tire fix, whether
274
00:16:04.960 --> 00:16:09.039
it's rubber or I like fixing problems like what should
275
00:16:09.080 --> 00:16:16.159
have problems well mathematical. I'm a big fan of Sudoku
276
00:16:16.960 --> 00:16:21.200
other brain games that make me remember my past.
277
00:16:22.600 --> 00:16:24.600
So you would say you're in touch with your past
278
00:16:24.840 --> 00:16:29.879
and your memory seems intact, and you're eating what are
279
00:16:29.919 --> 00:16:30.320
you eating?
280
00:16:31.320 --> 00:16:34.559
I eat nothing but beef, sometimes pork, it's the other
281
00:16:34.639 --> 00:16:39.720
white meat, and sometimes well sometimes I'll just chew on
282
00:16:39.799 --> 00:16:42.639
a stick. But most of the time I'm doing that.
283
00:16:42.960 --> 00:16:45.600
It's when someone finds me under the one oh one
284
00:16:46.360 --> 00:16:50.440
and I've been there for days, talking to myself, chewing
285
00:16:50.519 --> 00:16:51.159
on wood.
286
00:16:51.879 --> 00:16:53.679
Where do you get your sticks?
287
00:16:55.080 --> 00:16:57.759
From? Different places? A lot of the times just from
288
00:16:57.799 --> 00:17:00.519
the side of the road. I'm like a Golden retriever
289
00:17:00.879 --> 00:17:04.160
or a labrador. I can find a large stick and
290
00:17:04.240 --> 00:17:08.920
it becomes my friend, my close pal, someone i can
291
00:17:09.000 --> 00:17:12.279
talk to when I'm real loud of it, or someone
292
00:17:12.319 --> 00:17:14.480
i can just chew on when I need.
293
00:17:14.359 --> 00:17:18.559
To you live a very intricate life. I would guess
294
00:17:18.640 --> 00:17:21.279
that you're in your you're in your eighties now.
295
00:17:22.559 --> 00:17:25.160
I'm one hundred and forty eight years old. I was
296
00:17:25.240 --> 00:17:30.519
born a time when warlocks and sorcerers walk the earth.
297
00:17:31.279 --> 00:17:34.200
My mother was a maiden, and a fair one at that.
298
00:17:34.519 --> 00:17:38.720
And someone said, well, you're cursed to have an immortal son,
299
00:17:39.319 --> 00:17:43.519
but else stale his entire life. And well, my mother
300
00:17:43.599 --> 00:17:46.279
hid me from the wives men in the village and
301
00:17:46.359 --> 00:17:51.519
from the evil sorcerer. I think it's time for my pills.
302
00:17:52.119 --> 00:17:55.680
Well that's that's the way we go. I mean, you
303
00:17:55.839 --> 00:17:58.279
have to take your pills. And to think about pills,
304
00:17:58.319 --> 00:17:59.880
are you got to use water? And if you're gonna
305
00:17:59.920 --> 00:18:02.519
use water, grape juice or some maybe chocolate milk, you
306
00:18:02.640 --> 00:18:04.119
got to get enough of a gulf in there to
307
00:18:04.160 --> 00:18:07.440
get those pills down. So sam Uh, I wish you
308
00:18:07.480 --> 00:18:09.640
the best. I hope you have a big enough golf
309
00:18:09.720 --> 00:18:11.240
to get those pills down.
310
00:18:12.519 --> 00:18:14.200
I know we're having a lot of fun here, but
311
00:18:14.240 --> 00:18:18.200
I truly look forward to you playing Doctor Doom, and
312
00:18:18.279 --> 00:18:20.680
I hope that when you're a Doctor Doom, you know
313
00:18:20.759 --> 00:18:25.920
that the Fantastic Four well, there's four family members trying
314
00:18:25.960 --> 00:18:29.799
to make it through it, you know, like all of us.
315
00:18:30.359 --> 00:18:33.480
Well, spoiler alert, they're not all fantastic. But you know
316
00:18:33.519 --> 00:18:36.039
what I think you are. I think you're real cool.
317
00:18:37.359 --> 00:18:39.799
I like you, Robert, you're a good man.
318
00:18:40.000 --> 00:18:42.559
Okay, let me get the piece of paper that's on
319
00:18:42.599 --> 00:18:43.039
the ground.
320
00:18:44.240 --> 00:18:55.079
Go ahead, hold on, hold on, hold on a suck
321
00:18:55.079 --> 00:18:56.400
and we're going to settle in.
322
00:18:57.359 --> 00:18:58.480
I don't want to I don't want to put my
323
00:18:58.640 --> 00:19:01.160
arm Debbie, what am I gonna put? My arms? Are
324
00:19:01.200 --> 00:19:05.799
on the table or not on the table. All right,
325
00:19:05.880 --> 00:19:09.480
let's get started. This is Dustin Hoffman.
326
00:19:11.079 --> 00:19:12.440
I know who you is, bitch.
327
00:19:12.519 --> 00:19:15.160
I've been watching you since you got seduced by your
328
00:19:15.160 --> 00:19:16.160
girlfriend's mama.
329
00:19:16.480 --> 00:19:17.920
You should have never fucked the bitch.
330
00:19:18.160 --> 00:19:20.000
You should have let him give you head and then
331
00:19:20.079 --> 00:19:21.880
taken off your stupid motherfucker.
332
00:19:22.000 --> 00:19:24.119
Well, everybody loves head.
333
00:19:24.960 --> 00:19:27.519
I don't know Pimping. I don't know a single person
334
00:19:27.559 --> 00:19:28.720
that doesn't love head.
335
00:19:28.920 --> 00:19:29.519
I love it.
336
00:19:30.880 --> 00:19:33.000
First off, I think we're about the same height.
337
00:19:33.599 --> 00:19:33.839
Are you?
338
00:19:34.359 --> 00:19:34.880
How tall?
339
00:19:34.880 --> 00:19:38.319
Are you five two and a half, Pimping.
340
00:19:38.200 --> 00:19:39.640
I'm a little taller.
341
00:19:41.519 --> 00:19:43.839
Well, if we were, if we will find each other,
342
00:19:43.880 --> 00:19:45.680
it would be a micro brawl.
343
00:19:46.799 --> 00:19:49.720
With all those that's supposed to be I don't know.
344
00:19:49.839 --> 00:19:53.559
I've been up for seventeen days reading eight and seven books.
345
00:19:53.960 --> 00:19:59.920
You're very very ferocious leader or or is it a vorocious?
346
00:20:00.319 --> 00:20:03.119
What is it voracious or vorocious? You read a lot
347
00:20:03.160 --> 00:20:03.640
of books.
348
00:20:04.480 --> 00:20:08.079
I knew bitches named vorocious and voracious. I've known bitches
349
00:20:08.160 --> 00:20:13.920
named vorocious, voracious, venomous, vell That's a made up word
350
00:20:14.000 --> 00:20:17.319
I just created. I'm like Terrence Howard, but with languages
351
00:20:18.279 --> 00:20:19.079
very colorful.
352
00:20:19.440 --> 00:20:21.759
You're very colorful, You're very animated, and.
353
00:20:21.680 --> 00:20:24.319
Then you I'm very tiny, very angry, pimping.
354
00:20:24.519 --> 00:20:27.880
Well, you speak your mind, you you give you give
355
00:20:27.880 --> 00:20:31.039
a direct information. You're always giving direct information. Where do
356
00:20:31.039 --> 00:20:32.799
you get your direct information from?
357
00:20:33.640 --> 00:20:36.599
Because if you don't, these bitches go sideways on you. Dustin,
358
00:20:36.680 --> 00:20:39.480
Why have you not learned anything I've been saying. If
359
00:20:39.559 --> 00:20:42.039
you don't stay on them, then you gotta stay off
360
00:20:42.079 --> 00:20:44.839
of them because they become toxic for a player, for
361
00:20:44.920 --> 00:20:45.559
a play boy.
362
00:20:46.319 --> 00:20:48.680
But you get away with it because you're you're you're
363
00:20:48.759 --> 00:20:52.200
kind of a small figure. You're you're I mean stature,
364
00:20:52.279 --> 00:20:54.319
I mean just like you know, you're like a little guy.
365
00:20:55.480 --> 00:20:57.839
Bitches will never know when they're gonna get smacked by
366
00:20:57.880 --> 00:21:00.839
me because I come up and under, up under like
367
00:21:00.880 --> 00:21:01.559
a recession.
368
00:21:01.720 --> 00:21:03.559
Up in that bitch, right in that chin.
369
00:21:04.519 --> 00:21:06.799
Why do you get so upset? You seem very upset
370
00:21:06.880 --> 00:21:07.960
or is there something under?
371
00:21:08.279 --> 00:21:08.759
I want to.
372
00:21:08.720 --> 00:21:11.680
Reach things I want to touch. What's in a cabinet
373
00:21:11.680 --> 00:21:15.319
above my refrigerator. I got seven houses. I don't know
374
00:21:15.359 --> 00:21:18.119
where the cookies are. I ain't never known where the
375
00:21:18.160 --> 00:21:21.720
cookies are. It's a real problem when a pimp can't
376
00:21:21.720 --> 00:21:25.000
have I'm a nice Pepperidge Farm cookie.
377
00:21:25.519 --> 00:21:28.000
I want a Milano. I want to double milano.
378
00:21:28.079 --> 00:21:29.440
Bitch, I want to listen milano.
379
00:21:31.319 --> 00:21:33.440
I had a you can have a back.
380
00:21:33.759 --> 00:21:37.000
Barry Zito was a friend, and then I took her
381
00:21:37.039 --> 00:21:37.640
from him.
382
00:21:38.119 --> 00:21:40.359
I said, motherfucker, you can't throw a fastball.
383
00:21:40.519 --> 00:21:44.240
You don't deserve Samantha from Who's the boss, And you
384
00:21:44.279 --> 00:21:45.440
know who the boss is?
385
00:21:45.799 --> 00:21:47.680
It's me, pimping Kat Williams.
386
00:21:48.039 --> 00:21:50.119
I think you're upset because you're not getting the cookies
387
00:21:50.160 --> 00:21:50.960
that you can't find.
388
00:21:51.720 --> 00:21:52.079
I want.
389
00:21:52.119 --> 00:21:55.480
The cookie is dustined. You can count matches on the ground.
390
00:21:55.720 --> 00:21:57.519
Tell me why I can't get to the top of
391
00:21:57.559 --> 00:22:00.160
the refrigerator to know where my ym yums are.
392
00:22:00.480 --> 00:22:04.400
But don't forget slonely at the top, and you you
393
00:22:04.400 --> 00:22:06.960
you you've been at the top, you might even considerably
394
00:22:07.000 --> 00:22:09.599
still be on some level that you're still on top.
395
00:22:10.799 --> 00:22:14.279
I love what you're saying, but there's there's a.
396
00:22:14.359 --> 00:22:17.680
There's something in you, there's something in you that's that's
397
00:22:18.039 --> 00:22:20.759
riled up. And I don't know where that comes from.
398
00:22:20.799 --> 00:22:22.799
I don't know, you know, I don't know if it's
399
00:22:22.880 --> 00:22:24.720
it's something you can buy. I don't know if it's
400
00:22:24.720 --> 00:22:28.960
something you can wear, like a sweatshirt. But I think.
401
00:22:30.359 --> 00:22:32.680
I try to, I try to think of what it is,
402
00:22:32.880 --> 00:22:35.319
and every time I think, I think it's my hats,
403
00:22:35.640 --> 00:22:39.960
my hats. I wear so many hats. I'm a pimp,
404
00:22:40.000 --> 00:22:43.000
I'm a comedian, I'm a superstar, I'm everything. But I
405
00:22:43.039 --> 00:22:44.279
can't just get my cookies.
406
00:22:45.640 --> 00:22:48.319
You can't just order them on or like go on
407
00:22:48.799 --> 00:22:50.160
uber eats.
408
00:22:50.720 --> 00:22:53.039
I'm not allowed to have apps on my phone.
409
00:22:53.599 --> 00:22:56.400
My bitch is bigger than me, so she controls everything
410
00:22:56.440 --> 00:22:57.480
that's on my phone.
411
00:22:57.759 --> 00:23:00.920
This is not Isn't that something? Here's a guy, top
412
00:23:01.000 --> 00:23:06.000
of his class, comedian, outspoken, very funny, can't get any cookies.
413
00:23:08.279 --> 00:23:11.160
I've said it since the beginning, if a pimp could
414
00:23:11.160 --> 00:23:13.799
get a cookie, the next thing, I want a glass
415
00:23:13.799 --> 00:23:16.160
of milk. And then after a glass of milk, I
416
00:23:16.200 --> 00:23:18.920
want that pussy. That's what I'm coming for, a bitch,
417
00:23:19.440 --> 00:23:22.680
Give a pimper cookie, Give a pimper cookie, we will
418
00:23:22.759 --> 00:23:25.000
get it, and he'll demand a glass of milk.
419
00:23:25.359 --> 00:23:27.200
It sounds like you need some pussy milk.
420
00:23:28.519 --> 00:23:31.240
Pussy milk is the hardest milk to get. And you
421
00:23:31.359 --> 00:23:34.079
know that, Dustin Hoffman, You've been in the Illuminati since
422
00:23:34.279 --> 00:23:35.880
nineteen sixty one.
423
00:23:36.519 --> 00:23:38.079
Come, don't, don't don't.
424
00:23:38.720 --> 00:23:41.839
Oh, I know you've been there, you and Simon and Goldfunk. Oh,
425
00:23:41.880 --> 00:23:45.240
you nasty ass motherfuck I knew what you was doing
426
00:23:45.279 --> 00:23:46.160
in the woods.
427
00:23:47.240 --> 00:23:50.160
Just let's let's get back. Let's let's get back to
428
00:23:50.200 --> 00:23:50.880
pussy milk.
429
00:23:52.119 --> 00:23:54.720
I love it. I want to bathe in it. If
430
00:23:54.720 --> 00:23:55.960
I could, I would sleep in it.
431
00:23:56.000 --> 00:23:59.200
I would have a waterbed made of pussy milk just
432
00:23:59.279 --> 00:24:01.839
right under there, feel the sloush of pussy milk.
433
00:24:01.920 --> 00:24:04.079
Bitch, did you call me a bitch?
434
00:24:05.000 --> 00:24:05.200
Oh?
435
00:24:05.400 --> 00:24:08.880
Never, mister Hoffman, I would never do that. I love you,
436
00:24:08.960 --> 00:24:12.640
and and your catalog of acting has inspired me to
437
00:24:12.799 --> 00:24:17.440
treat bitches better, to treat the motherfuckers in my in
438
00:24:17.559 --> 00:24:21.759
my crew better man. This is tough not to say
439
00:24:21.759 --> 00:24:24.680
the N word. I've been trying not to say that.
440
00:24:25.119 --> 00:24:31.000
Literally literally, not saying it is very difficult, very difficult,
441
00:24:31.240 --> 00:24:33.480
very difficult, very difficult.
442
00:24:34.640 --> 00:24:37.119
But I think you're going Are you going through a
443
00:24:37.160 --> 00:24:38.000
lot of dustin.
444
00:24:37.839 --> 00:24:41.039
How I'm going through. I'm going through my old baseball cards.
445
00:24:42.079 --> 00:24:43.240
Oh, that's a lot of fun.
446
00:24:43.519 --> 00:24:43.720
Yeah.
447
00:24:43.720 --> 00:24:45.640
I found a find of Ty Cobb.
448
00:24:47.640 --> 00:24:50.960
He was a great player. Was he the racist one?
449
00:24:51.440 --> 00:24:51.640
Uh?
450
00:24:52.039 --> 00:24:55.200
Well he had he had he would yeah, yeah, I
451
00:24:55.240 --> 00:24:59.279
think so. Yeah, he had Uh he had very big hands,
452
00:24:59.400 --> 00:25:02.079
very large hands, very big knuckles. And I remember he
453
00:25:02.119 --> 00:25:05.119
would shadows. It would it would put a shadow on
454
00:25:05.200 --> 00:25:09.079
his on his hands so it didn't look like he
455
00:25:09.200 --> 00:25:11.359
would make up. He would put shadow on his hands
456
00:25:11.359 --> 00:25:14.759
so it didn't look like he was had these big hands.
457
00:25:17.079 --> 00:25:18.599
That's the way to hide it. I do that with
458
00:25:18.640 --> 00:25:21.759
bitches with big clits. I say, don't show it, hide it.
459
00:25:21.839 --> 00:25:23.039
I want you to hide it for me.
460
00:25:23.119 --> 00:25:23.400
Baby.
461
00:25:23.480 --> 00:25:25.759
You gotta hide your clip. You gotta hide your clip.
462
00:25:26.599 --> 00:25:29.279
Do you think enough people are hiding their clits?
463
00:25:29.839 --> 00:25:31.920
I think that's why the world is in the place
464
00:25:31.960 --> 00:25:35.039
that it's in all these big clip bitches walking around
465
00:25:35.079 --> 00:25:35.680
proud of it.
466
00:25:35.759 --> 00:25:41.160
Pimman, they're all on their own clits. You know there,
467
00:25:41.200 --> 00:25:43.880
I think you can be you can because I played
468
00:25:43.880 --> 00:25:46.119
a woman. I played a woman in the movie Tutsie,
469
00:25:46.440 --> 00:25:49.480
and I remember being as a woman. I could feel something.
470
00:25:49.279 --> 00:25:51.640
A beautiful woman, A bad bitch.
471
00:25:51.480 --> 00:25:53.480
Thank you very much. But they did a lot of
472
00:25:53.519 --> 00:25:56.319
makeup and like again with the ty Cobb's hand, it
473
00:25:56.359 --> 00:25:59.440
would they would shadow my face and my trying to
474
00:25:59.480 --> 00:26:03.039
make me look colnor anguiler. I had to get in there.
475
00:26:03.079 --> 00:26:04.799
I had to go like four hours early just to
476
00:26:04.799 --> 00:26:07.680
do makeup tests when we were shooting. And because you
477
00:26:07.720 --> 00:26:10.119
didn't know what to do with me, because because because
478
00:26:10.200 --> 00:26:12.839
you know, I just don't. I just I just I'm
479
00:26:12.880 --> 00:26:15.559
just too I'm just not right.
480
00:26:17.119 --> 00:26:19.160
You're a lot of man. You too much man to
481
00:26:19.279 --> 00:26:19.759
lock down.
482
00:26:19.759 --> 00:26:21.400
That's why they had to put you in a little
483
00:26:21.440 --> 00:26:22.880
body because you're too much.
484
00:26:23.039 --> 00:26:24.960
Because I'm not as small as you are, right and
485
00:26:25.160 --> 00:26:25.759
take it easy.
486
00:26:26.079 --> 00:26:27.519
I don't. Let's not get into this.
487
00:26:27.720 --> 00:26:29.680
Let's get into it. Why don't we get into it?
488
00:26:29.759 --> 00:26:31.319
I can't.
489
00:26:31.519 --> 00:26:34.039
I think I've reached my maximum with you. Dustin Hoffman.
490
00:26:34.440 --> 00:26:36.319
You're a good man. All right, but I.
491
00:26:36.279 --> 00:26:38.000
Gotta get back. I gotta get my cookie.
492
00:26:38.079 --> 00:26:39.200
You're right, I gotta go to.
493
00:26:43.839 --> 00:26:44.160
DVD.
494
00:26:44.240 --> 00:26:51.200
Dowdy Day, Dowd one two three, Dewity Up two three.
495
00:26:53.480 --> 00:26:55.240
Hey man, I'm just gonna tell you I don't even
496
00:26:55.279 --> 00:26:58.200
know what the hell you're talking about. You know, like,
497
00:26:58.240 --> 00:27:00.400
I've been hitting the head a lot, and I'm like
498
00:27:00.720 --> 00:27:02.440
beat up and stuff.
499
00:27:02.680 --> 00:27:06.480
We've both been through it. I had two motorcycle accidents
500
00:27:06.799 --> 00:27:08.640
and I couldn't I couldn't know where I was for
501
00:27:08.680 --> 00:27:11.079
about three weeks. And once I realized where I was
502
00:27:11.839 --> 00:27:13.759
and I ordered a subway sandwich.
503
00:27:15.279 --> 00:27:18.240
What's crazy is I remember we tried to get you
504
00:27:18.279 --> 00:27:21.559
on Jackass and they were like, dude, he's not even
505
00:27:21.559 --> 00:27:23.200
gonna try to come on here.
506
00:27:24.160 --> 00:27:26.240
Well, a lot of things going on, you know. I
507
00:27:26.279 --> 00:27:28.880
was born in Goose Creek, Texas in nineteen forty four,
508
00:27:28.920 --> 00:27:31.920
and I don't even know anything about anything. That's what
509
00:27:32.000 --> 00:27:34.119
I say to people. Let me keep sleeping. I'm not
510
00:27:34.160 --> 00:27:34.920
going to go anywhere.
511
00:27:34.920 --> 00:27:36.000
I don't want to do anything.
512
00:27:36.440 --> 00:27:37.400
Diamond Ring, I.
513
00:27:37.440 --> 00:27:39.920
Love that I can rhyme. You know how to rhyme.
514
00:27:41.160 --> 00:27:41.640
I know how.
515
00:27:41.920 --> 00:27:43.640
I don't really know how to rhyme, but I do
516
00:27:43.799 --> 00:27:47.240
know that, like if someone wants to like put something outside,
517
00:27:47.440 --> 00:27:47.799
I can.
518
00:27:47.799 --> 00:27:51.039
Like run it. I'll run through glass to get it.
519
00:27:51.200 --> 00:27:52.680
Have you ever ran through glass?
520
00:27:52.839 --> 00:27:56.880
Gary Busey, Yeah, a few times on accident, but I
521
00:27:57.559 --> 00:28:00.480
realized I was running on glass when I fell out
522
00:28:00.519 --> 00:28:01.160
my ash.
523
00:28:02.319 --> 00:28:05.359
Oh you're kind of like that broken Glass.
524
00:28:04.920 --> 00:28:05.559
Song by.
525
00:28:07.279 --> 00:28:15.160
Like I'm walking walking, walking on walking, like I'm walking
526
00:28:15.240 --> 00:28:19.279
on broke and.
527
00:28:17.759 --> 00:28:19.559
I'd be like, hey, what's up. This is Steve O,
528
00:28:19.880 --> 00:28:25.920
and this is I was getting called bro But yeah, you're.
529
00:28:25.680 --> 00:28:28.880
You're Gary Gary b Hi, I'm Gary bch You want
530
00:28:28.880 --> 00:28:31.160
to go? You want to go get a steak shandwich
531
00:28:31.240 --> 00:28:31.480
with me?
532
00:28:33.319 --> 00:28:35.680
I can't believe I'm going to do this, but I
533
00:28:35.880 --> 00:28:38.480
just know that STEVEO had to leave because I don't
534
00:28:38.519 --> 00:28:41.279
believe Steve O was actually here for a minute. And
535
00:28:41.279 --> 00:28:43.920
I'm sorry to do this to you, but it was
536
00:28:44.599 --> 00:28:47.480
I couldn't believe that Steve O was talking to Gary Bucy,
537
00:28:47.720 --> 00:28:50.640
so I had to cut in and say, I'm Dave
538
00:28:50.720 --> 00:28:54.759
Chappelle and I'm easily the biggest fan of yours. I've
539
00:28:54.799 --> 00:28:58.839
loved you in everything you've ever done and point break
540
00:28:59.559 --> 00:29:03.440
Predator too. You the craziest motherfucker I've ever seen in
541
00:29:03.480 --> 00:29:08.559
my life, and I need it. Gary Busey, you made it.
542
00:29:08.680 --> 00:29:09.240
You made it.
543
00:29:09.720 --> 00:29:12.319
You ever make an omelet with deer meat and then
544
00:29:12.359 --> 00:29:14.640
you forget it's on your floor and then you pick
545
00:29:14.680 --> 00:29:17.000
it up and you try to microwave it, but you
546
00:29:17.039 --> 00:29:18.519
forgot where the microwave was.
547
00:29:19.799 --> 00:29:21.839
That's the kind of crazy shit that I like that
548
00:29:21.880 --> 00:29:24.240
comes out of your mouth because I have no idea
549
00:29:24.359 --> 00:29:27.880
what any things you just said, but I want the recipe.
550
00:29:28.279 --> 00:29:30.480
I want you to make me that omelet, if that
551
00:29:30.519 --> 00:29:31.319
makes any sense.
552
00:29:31.519 --> 00:29:33.039
I want to make you something too.
553
00:29:33.160 --> 00:29:37.720
I want to make it some butter sausage, buttery.
554
00:29:38.319 --> 00:29:41.440
I would love butter sausage. But here's the thing, I
555
00:29:41.440 --> 00:29:44.279
don't know how much butter sausage I can eat. I'm
556
00:29:44.319 --> 00:29:47.480
a very I'm starting to watch my diet and that
557
00:29:47.559 --> 00:29:50.200
might be a little too much butter sausage.
558
00:29:51.720 --> 00:29:52.920
Well, I'm gonna have to leave.
559
00:29:52.960 --> 00:29:55.680
I might have my buddy Jimmy Fallons coming in.
560
00:29:56.680 --> 00:30:02.720
I've known Jimmy fle Yes, I remember Jimmy ay Man.
561
00:30:03.519 --> 00:30:05.440
I can't believe man, take you to see it. I
562
00:30:05.440 --> 00:30:09.240
can't believe Dave Chappelle. You know when I can't believe.
563
00:30:08.920 --> 00:30:13.359
That I haven't seen you since they reanimated your corpse
564
00:30:13.559 --> 00:30:16.279
when you fell out of thirty Rock at S and
565
00:30:16.519 --> 00:30:20.799
L forty. I said that man is gonna survive that fall,
566
00:30:21.039 --> 00:30:23.640
And Lauren Michael said, we got people that can work
567
00:30:23.640 --> 00:30:26.599
on them. We got people that work on them every day. Jimmy,
568
00:30:26.680 --> 00:30:28.720
how much of you was actually machine?
569
00:30:28.799 --> 00:30:33.559
Now I'm thirty percent human, so the rest is a machine.
570
00:30:34.160 --> 00:30:36.920
But but sometimes they've been working on me. And then
571
00:30:36.960 --> 00:30:39.839
my feet, my feet are my feet are robotic, but
572
00:30:39.880 --> 00:30:44.559
the skin is regular. And then my eyes are marbles,
573
00:30:45.079 --> 00:30:47.240
but they're not the regular marbles, and they kind of
574
00:30:47.240 --> 00:30:49.480
marbles that are kind of dull. And that's why I
575
00:30:49.559 --> 00:30:51.559
kind of have that off, you know, kind of and
576
00:30:51.720 --> 00:30:53.279
I'm in the moment, you know, in the moment, but
577
00:30:53.359 --> 00:30:55.319
I'm also I'm also full of shit, you know what
578
00:30:55.319 --> 00:30:55.599
I mean?
579
00:30:56.880 --> 00:30:58.440
Well, that was what I was gonna say, is I
580
00:30:58.480 --> 00:31:01.599
remember an old story that Charlie Murphy told me about
581
00:31:01.640 --> 00:31:05.200
one time you got struck by lightning when you was
582
00:31:05.240 --> 00:31:10.079
out partying in the Hamptons and it gave you superpowers
583
00:31:10.119 --> 00:31:15.839
for four days until you fought a mysterious alien predator,
584
00:31:16.559 --> 00:31:17.519
in which case you.
585
00:31:17.559 --> 00:31:19.680
Died and came back and I said, I've.
586
00:31:19.480 --> 00:31:22.200
Known Jimmy longer than that. I knew him before that,
587
00:31:23.319 --> 00:31:25.680
but I didn't know that the Now you have mental
588
00:31:25.720 --> 00:31:29.640
powers to appease the guests on the tonight show. I
589
00:31:29.640 --> 00:31:31.920
think that's a great thing. I think people need to
590
00:31:32.000 --> 00:31:32.920
applaud you. Now.
591
00:31:32.799 --> 00:31:35.799
Now, now you gotta you gotta, you gotta apply the engineers,
592
00:31:35.799 --> 00:31:37.440
the ones that put the put me together.
593
00:31:37.519 --> 00:31:40.039
You know, Okay, you know it's.
594
00:31:40.079 --> 00:31:41.839
But I want to talk to you real quick about
595
00:31:41.880 --> 00:31:46.440
black engineers. Now, you gotta understand something. Black engineers have
596
00:31:46.599 --> 00:31:50.200
never got the right shape. The man that invented the
597
00:31:50.279 --> 00:31:56.079
Android's name was Jamal Android. Now, the reason they didn't
598
00:31:56.160 --> 00:31:58.720
tell you that was because they never wanted to make
599
00:31:58.759 --> 00:32:02.839
a black robot. Because a black robot could break the
600
00:32:02.880 --> 00:32:05.960
white man's curse, and they never talk about it. It's
601
00:32:06.079 --> 00:32:07.319
very important you listen to me.
602
00:32:08.200 --> 00:32:11.279
All comes down to black robots. Huh.
603
00:32:11.640 --> 00:32:14.319
I've been saying this for years. If you can give
604
00:32:14.359 --> 00:32:17.279
me an army, Okay, if you give me an army
605
00:32:17.319 --> 00:32:22.680
of forty to fifty black cyborgs, I could reverse races.
606
00:32:22.960 --> 00:32:25.720
I could do it in a week. Jimmy, I could
607
00:32:25.720 --> 00:32:26.640
do it in two days.
608
00:32:26.680 --> 00:32:30.079
If you wanted to two days to be great. When
609
00:32:30.119 --> 00:32:30.720
can you start?
610
00:32:32.000 --> 00:32:34.000
Well, I didn't know you were serious. I didn't know
611
00:32:34.039 --> 00:32:37.480
you had access to black cyborgs. Now that's gonna change
612
00:32:37.519 --> 00:32:39.680
everything for me. You've got to understand I live in
613
00:32:39.759 --> 00:32:42.880
Yellow Springs, Ohio. But I could get to a military base,
614
00:32:43.240 --> 00:32:46.160
I would say Fort Bragg in about three to four days.
615
00:32:46.480 --> 00:32:48.119
So you give me four days we can get that
616
00:32:48.160 --> 00:32:50.119
Cyburg army up and fuck some bitches up.
617
00:32:50.440 --> 00:32:52.480
Well, I mean, you don't have to. You don't have to.
618
00:32:52.559 --> 00:32:55.440
You don't have to wait till you could come to today.
619
00:32:55.720 --> 00:32:56.720
You know you can stay with me.
620
00:32:57.079 --> 00:32:59.880
I can't do today. I can't do today. I got
621
00:32:59.880 --> 00:33:02.920
a croquet match at four pm and I just can't
622
00:33:03.039 --> 00:33:06.279
leave that. It's a very croquet is very important and
623
00:33:06.400 --> 00:33:07.440
Yellow Springs.
624
00:33:07.119 --> 00:33:10.640
Over id ccat do you say croquette?
625
00:33:10.640 --> 00:33:13.359
Well, that's a funny word, you know, curkquet.
626
00:33:13.079 --> 00:33:16.519
Come out man. It was another game invented by a
627
00:33:16.519 --> 00:33:19.440
black man that never got to play. Randall Croquete was
628
00:33:20.119 --> 00:33:25.079
a Tuski yam and and he invented croquet. But they
629
00:33:25.119 --> 00:33:27.400
don't want to tell you that. In the history of books.
630
00:33:27.680 --> 00:33:30.079
They don't want you to know that. They don't want
631
00:33:30.119 --> 00:33:32.559
you to know when you're at your barbecues that you're
632
00:33:32.559 --> 00:33:35.920
playing a black man's game. Very important.
633
00:33:36.119 --> 00:33:37.519
What about black croquette.
634
00:33:39.599 --> 00:33:43.880
It's called broquet and you don't play it with mallets.
635
00:33:44.079 --> 00:33:46.640
You actually play it with air. Jordan's on your feet
636
00:33:46.960 --> 00:33:50.680
and you kick the balls through. It's a different game
637
00:33:50.759 --> 00:33:51.400
that I'm not a.
638
00:33:51.400 --> 00:33:52.440
Fan Michael Jordan.
639
00:33:52.759 --> 00:33:54.640
Talk about Michael, you're talking about black guys. I mean
640
00:33:54.640 --> 00:33:57.720
this guy, he's a basketball player. You ever seen a
641
00:33:57.759 --> 00:33:58.240
whole life?
642
00:33:58.319 --> 00:34:02.440
Huh? Come man, I've I've never met a man that
643
00:34:02.640 --> 00:34:06.400
loved gambling more than Michael Jordan. Michael Jordan bet me
644
00:34:06.480 --> 00:34:09.320
that he would win his next bet. That's been inside
645
00:34:09.320 --> 00:34:11.679
a bet. I think about that daily.
646
00:34:15.920 --> 00:34:19.000
Oh God, it's hot in here? Are you? Did you
647
00:34:19.079 --> 00:34:21.119
put that thing? Is the temperature? Right?
648
00:34:22.719 --> 00:34:25.920
Hey? I haven't seen you in forever. How you been, Louis?
649
00:34:27.440 --> 00:34:29.800
Oh we both we're dead, but we haven't run into
650
00:34:29.800 --> 00:34:31.480
each other yet. That's so weird.
651
00:34:32.239 --> 00:34:34.199
I'm gonna tell you why. That's because I'm in Hell.
652
00:34:34.400 --> 00:34:37.960
It's a little hot where I'm What happened, Well.
653
00:34:37.760 --> 00:34:39.400
Let's just say there were a couple of women that
654
00:34:39.440 --> 00:34:41.199
I got rid of that I didn't know that was
655
00:34:41.199 --> 00:34:43.480
against the wall. I thought I was just getting rid
656
00:34:43.480 --> 00:34:44.280
of a headache.
657
00:34:44.679 --> 00:34:47.920
Oh god, that's it. I had no idea. So that's I.
658
00:34:47.880 --> 00:34:50.079
Got a murder streak, Louis a lot of people don't
659
00:34:50.079 --> 00:34:54.239
know that about me. Why a murder streak? You know
660
00:34:54.320 --> 00:34:55.320
a lot of people are.
661
00:34:55.239 --> 00:34:59.000
Violence, remember telling everybody.
662
00:35:00.239 --> 00:35:02.280
I look around everybody, and I go, you know what,
663
00:35:02.320 --> 00:35:04.440
if I went to school, I'd be shooting you too.
664
00:35:04.559 --> 00:35:07.760
I'd make you pay. Yeah, the girl doesn't want to
665
00:35:07.760 --> 00:35:09.440
take me to the dance. Well guess what, there's not
666
00:35:09.480 --> 00:35:11.559
going to be a dance because I'm gonna kill everybody.
667
00:35:12.800 --> 00:35:15.880
That's funny, That's funny, But you're serious, going.
668
00:35:16.519 --> 00:35:19.639
I'm dead serious. Hey, you know I saw those Columbine
669
00:35:19.719 --> 00:35:21.679
kids and I went, what took you so long? I
670
00:35:21.719 --> 00:35:23.679
should have been doing this back when I was a kid.
671
00:35:23.679 --> 00:35:27.440
You know my doctor, Vinniebumbots, I said, Doctor, I got
672
00:35:27.440 --> 00:35:29.599
some kids that they're teasing me. What should I do?
673
00:35:29.840 --> 00:35:32.360
He said, get a sway automatic? Then is the parents
674
00:35:32.400 --> 00:35:33.280
are going to miss them too.
675
00:35:33.920 --> 00:35:37.079
Okay, so you're okay, this is a different kind of Rodney.
676
00:35:37.079 --> 00:35:41.119
What would you classify this part of your life? I mean,
677
00:35:41.199 --> 00:35:43.079
your dad, But you're still killing.
678
00:35:42.960 --> 00:35:46.079
Pro school shooter. You know it's not a really popular take,
679
00:35:46.159 --> 00:35:47.840
but you got to go where you can get. And
680
00:35:47.840 --> 00:35:49.800
I'm telling you right now, I'm running out of takes.
681
00:35:50.159 --> 00:35:51.920
So right now I'm pro school shooter.
682
00:35:52.639 --> 00:35:54.679
Okay, Well that's I mean, I would keep that to
683
00:35:54.719 --> 00:35:57.599
yourself if you're still trying to get into Heaven, are you.
684
00:35:57.719 --> 00:35:59.519
I'm just trying to let these kids know. You don't
685
00:35:59.519 --> 00:36:01.360
got to tell you lye them down. If you got
686
00:36:01.360 --> 00:36:04.000
a bully in your school, shoot them at school.
687
00:36:05.880 --> 00:36:08.039
Okay. I feel like I don't know you anymore, and
688
00:36:08.119 --> 00:36:10.320
I'm not gonna worry about that because I still love you,
689
00:36:10.559 --> 00:36:12.719
and I love your comedy, and I listen.
690
00:36:12.719 --> 00:36:15.880
I would never listen. Me and you, Louis, we're good friends.
691
00:36:15.960 --> 00:36:18.679
We go back. In fact, if we were in school together,
692
00:36:18.719 --> 00:36:20.480
I'd probably go up to you and I'd say, hey,
693
00:36:21.000 --> 00:36:24.119
don't come to school tomorrow, and you would listen, and
694
00:36:24.159 --> 00:36:26.199
you look in my eyes and you would know I
695
00:36:26.239 --> 00:36:27.679
was about to exact revenge.
696
00:36:27.880 --> 00:36:30.840
You know, I probably wouldn't listen, because you know I'd
697
00:36:30.840 --> 00:36:32.199
love school and I would just.
698
00:36:32.559 --> 00:36:35.159
I know, yeah, I can't keep you away from learning.
699
00:36:35.480 --> 00:36:38.400
I always knew that about you, Louis. You love the books.
700
00:36:38.599 --> 00:36:40.360
Every time I saw you, I'd say, what, what what
701
00:36:40.400 --> 00:36:41.039
book you're reading?
702
00:36:41.320 --> 00:36:43.920
Well, it's a school launched it. I remember one time
703
00:36:43.920 --> 00:36:46.559
when I was a child, they had Nacho Day and
704
00:36:46.599 --> 00:36:50.320
they had all these little compartments with the had that
705
00:36:50.519 --> 00:36:53.679
cheese and the beef and all these things, and that
706
00:36:54.440 --> 00:36:57.800
just everybody couldn't handle themselves, so they just threw it.
707
00:36:57.920 --> 00:36:58.440
They threw it.
708
00:36:58.480 --> 00:36:59.679
Everywhere was a food fight.
709
00:37:00.920 --> 00:37:03.119
I would have killed when nachos at lunch, every time
710
00:37:03.119 --> 00:37:04.719
I got in the lunch line, when I'd hit till
711
00:37:04.719 --> 00:37:06.800
the lunch lady and she'd go, you've already had enough.
712
00:37:07.199 --> 00:37:08.840
I said, I have an eight today. She said, are
713
00:37:08.880 --> 00:37:11.800
you sure about that? I'd go hungry. That's why I'm
714
00:37:11.800 --> 00:37:14.159
so mad, Louis. They got me going hungry out.
715
00:37:14.360 --> 00:37:17.079
You got it, well, because you're you've killed all those people,
716
00:37:17.360 --> 00:37:18.039
I mean nobody.
717
00:37:18.280 --> 00:37:20.079
Well, I want to kill pal. You know, these are
718
00:37:20.079 --> 00:37:22.119
more fantasies than I put in my journals. But if
719
00:37:22.159 --> 00:37:24.880
I ever do it, they're gonna find my journals.
720
00:37:25.079 --> 00:37:27.800
Okay, so you haven't killed anyone.
721
00:37:28.119 --> 00:37:31.360
No, I'm I'm just pro school shooter. I haven't actually
722
00:37:31.400 --> 00:37:33.039
done it, and I don't got the balls to do it.
723
00:37:33.039 --> 00:37:34.719
You don't have to be a real cigo to actually
724
00:37:34.719 --> 00:37:35.119
go talk.
725
00:37:36.599 --> 00:37:38.719
You have to be so excited. God, you make me
726
00:37:38.760 --> 00:37:43.239
want to play the feud. God by serving you mind it.
727
00:37:43.320 --> 00:37:47.599
Donny Survey says Steve Harvey.
728
00:37:47.800 --> 00:37:51.360
Steve Harvey, God half the one you are. Well, I'm
729
00:37:51.360 --> 00:37:54.960
still jealous of Steve Harvey, even from heaven, because he
730
00:37:55.079 --> 00:37:57.159
really did something with that show. I mean, he was
731
00:37:57.199 --> 00:38:03.000
so calm. Nobody is that hmm. You know, I was sweat.
732
00:38:03.280 --> 00:38:04.800
You would have done way better if they had a
733
00:38:04.800 --> 00:38:07.360
bigger suit budget for you. You know, I look at
734
00:38:07.360 --> 00:38:10.280
Steve Harvey's suits, I say, what is this the American
735
00:38:10.280 --> 00:38:14.280
military budget? Look at this? Just putting us in a deficit. Jesus.
736
00:38:14.280 --> 00:38:16.920
That purple suit probably costs four million. That's enough. Four things.
737
00:38:16.960 --> 00:38:20.400
Well, you know, purple is a very expensive color, you know, because.
738
00:38:20.400 --> 00:38:22.360
I understand it's the color Royals.
739
00:38:22.239 --> 00:38:25.119
The color royalty, but it's the only color that comes
740
00:38:25.159 --> 00:38:29.920
from deer blood. And I saw one of those little
741
00:38:29.960 --> 00:38:32.480
reels on Instagram told me all about it.
742
00:38:32.679 --> 00:38:36.000
Yeah, I'm telling you, I'm such a bad school shooter.
743
00:38:36.239 --> 00:38:37.960
I used to go hunting and I'd take a shot
744
00:38:37.960 --> 00:38:39.559
at the deer and they say, thank God, I go No,
745
00:38:39.599 --> 00:38:41.559
I don't go to school you as I don't even
746
00:38:41.559 --> 00:38:42.280
know what that means.
747
00:38:43.239 --> 00:38:46.840
You know what I think it means. They're special guy,
748
00:38:47.239 --> 00:38:51.840
and there's something special about you. Even though you're in Hell.
749
00:38:51.960 --> 00:38:53.760
Louis, you're trying to make me. You're trying to make me,
750
00:38:54.039 --> 00:38:55.880
You're trying to make me emotional, You're trying to make
751
00:38:55.880 --> 00:39:00.079
me ask for forgiveness. I'm very close to tell and
752
00:39:00.519 --> 00:39:02.440
I could be in heaven. If I was in heaven,
753
00:39:03.440 --> 00:39:05.599
they'd probably send us all back to Hell. You get
754
00:39:05.599 --> 00:39:06.199
what I'm saying.
755
00:39:06.320 --> 00:39:08.400
Yeah, And you know Hell doesn't. Hell isn't what it
756
00:39:08.519 --> 00:39:09.679
used to be from what they hear.
757
00:39:09.920 --> 00:39:14.599
You know, it's got priced out. There's a lot a
758
00:39:14.599 --> 00:39:16.840
lot more white steeple like it hot. They don't like
759
00:39:16.920 --> 00:39:19.639
the cold weather. So a lot of people like Hell
760
00:39:19.880 --> 00:39:22.360
because they get that they get the heat.
761
00:39:22.719 --> 00:39:25.760
Yeah, it's a dry heat too. I'm totally just satan
762
00:39:25.920 --> 00:39:28.519
this guy. He's not even a real guy. He's got hooves.
763
00:39:28.920 --> 00:39:31.000
Last time I saw hooves on somebody that was my
764
00:39:31.039 --> 00:39:33.440
ex wife. I still want with three thousand dollars.
765
00:39:34.760 --> 00:39:36.519
Well, I mean, they're they're not going to track you
766
00:39:36.559 --> 00:39:37.320
down where you are.
767
00:39:38.519 --> 00:39:40.960
I hold not. It's gonna take a Ouiji.
768
00:39:40.679 --> 00:39:44.400
Board oi gi board you know that song? Morrisey Owiji
769
00:39:44.480 --> 00:39:49.519
board o g bard o each board something something something.
770
00:39:50.079 --> 00:39:53.119
I can't fucking remember anything up here. I can't. I'm
771
00:39:53.159 --> 00:39:54.960
not gonna get into it because you're in hell and
772
00:39:55.000 --> 00:39:55.400
I'm here.
773
00:39:55.440 --> 00:39:58.400
But god, hey, no, I love to rub it in.
774
00:39:58.840 --> 00:40:02.920
It's it's it's not fun anymore. At first, it was
775
00:40:03.000 --> 00:40:05.079
like all the shrimp you want. You know, you get
776
00:40:05.119 --> 00:40:07.400
as much shrimp as you want. Well, you know, when
777
00:40:07.400 --> 00:40:12.440
you're in heaven, you know only so much is does
778
00:40:12.480 --> 00:40:15.679
it feel like kind of like a treat after the rest,
779
00:40:15.719 --> 00:40:18.199
feels like your stomach's fall to fall.
780
00:40:18.599 --> 00:40:20.360
That's the problem. That's the problem with all you can
781
00:40:20.440 --> 00:40:23.079
eat buffets. You're having too mutch. You should only get
782
00:40:23.159 --> 00:40:25.760
enough of your fill and then put it down. Trust me,
783
00:40:26.039 --> 00:40:27.519
your butt doesn't need it. I know.
784
00:40:28.000 --> 00:40:29.280
That's what I keep telling myself.
785
00:40:29.960 --> 00:40:33.320
I think you keep telling myself that it's not in
786
00:40:33.400 --> 00:40:33.599
your air?
787
00:40:33.880 --> 00:40:37.760
Good you ever do that? You read I'm Louis Anderson.
788
00:40:37.840 --> 00:40:40.239
People don't talk about Louis Anderson, but they got to
789
00:40:40.280 --> 00:40:43.440
talk about Louis Anderson. I'm making I'm making some stickers
790
00:40:43.480 --> 00:40:44.760
to people that pass out.
791
00:40:45.320 --> 00:40:47.840
Keep my memory going for Louis Life with Louis was
792
00:40:47.840 --> 00:40:50.960
one of the best cartoons I've ever seen, and cartoons
793
00:40:51.000 --> 00:40:52.119
for kids, but I liked it.
794
00:40:52.199 --> 00:40:54.639
I'm gonna do Fickster for kids. Do and don't forget that?
795
00:40:56.119 --> 00:41:01.280
All right, let's go ahead and uh, okay, how about so,
796
00:41:01.679 --> 00:41:04.639
I don't want to keep you much longer. I know
797
00:41:04.719 --> 00:41:06.960
you've got a very busy schedule, but.
798
00:41:09.440 --> 00:41:16.079
I have a very big schedule schedule m de fall.
799
00:41:16.559 --> 00:41:23.079
I argue you are very scared by sometimes I see
800
00:41:23.159 --> 00:41:23.760
the humor.
801
00:41:27.559 --> 00:41:31.360
Well, listen, I'm a huge fan. I love wrestling. I
802
00:41:31.400 --> 00:41:34.440
love it. I love w WF wrestling, and I know
803
00:41:34.519 --> 00:41:37.719
that you were on there for a long time. What
804
00:41:37.800 --> 00:41:41.719
do you what are your tribute? You're dead now, aren't you?
805
00:41:41.719 --> 00:41:43.199
You're not alive? Is that right?
806
00:41:43.840 --> 00:41:49.119
I'm all he we go around soon.
807
00:41:50.280 --> 00:41:55.320
Okay, I didn't get a I didn't hear what you said.
808
00:41:55.440 --> 00:41:57.320
What did you What did you say?
809
00:41:57.880 --> 00:41:58.719
I say.
810
00:42:01.199 --> 00:42:08.639
With Okay, you're the only guy that could eat Louis Anderson?
811
00:42:09.119 --> 00:42:11.239
Isn't that right?
812
00:42:11.280 --> 00:42:15.519
Probably good? But while I wound through, I think it
813
00:42:15.679 --> 00:42:16.760
is Fay.
814
00:42:17.920 --> 00:42:20.920
What it is about you that makes you special, and
815
00:42:20.960 --> 00:42:25.320
that makes acting acting, and that makes wrestling. Wrestling is
816
00:42:25.400 --> 00:42:28.760
that you are bigger than life, not just in size,
817
00:42:28.800 --> 00:42:34.320
but in virtue, in memory and cunning. What did it?
818
00:42:35.000 --> 00:42:37.440
What did it feel like to get bigger and bigger
819
00:42:37.519 --> 00:42:39.960
and not really know what you're gonna do with yourself?
820
00:42:41.639 --> 00:42:46.239
It fell like I couldn't starved given beer. So I
821
00:42:46.280 --> 00:42:51.119
said to my doctor something is wrong, and he said, no,
822
00:42:51.639 --> 00:42:58.960
you are child. Through that, I say, I like you
823
00:43:00.159 --> 00:43:05.440
for hours a gorn in a movie. Will you are
824
00:43:05.599 --> 00:43:06.480
very fine?
825
00:43:07.519 --> 00:43:10.480
Well, unfortunately, the tough part about a movie is you've
826
00:43:10.519 --> 00:43:13.239
got to be able to understand what the person is saying,
827
00:43:13.400 --> 00:43:15.400
and with you, you can't relate.
828
00:43:15.480 --> 00:43:20.880
I understand everything you are saying. Are you saying you
829
00:43:20.960 --> 00:43:22.239
can't understand me?
830
00:43:23.599 --> 00:43:26.679
You know the song by the Police that says, don't stand,
831
00:43:27.159 --> 00:43:29.960
don't stand, don't stand so close to me?
832
00:43:31.320 --> 00:43:33.320
Ourse I love that album.
833
00:43:33.719 --> 00:43:36.360
Well, that song kind of reminds me of you, because
834
00:43:36.800 --> 00:43:40.239
you're a guy. You're out there doing your thing. If
835
00:43:40.280 --> 00:43:44.840
you want a Coca Cola, it's like twelve Coca colas, so.
836
00:43:45.119 --> 00:43:49.719
It's very time, my hounds. It is like I'm holding
837
00:43:50.400 --> 00:43:57.760
a super colb oh our, a super cold of Coca Go.
838
00:43:59.039 --> 00:44:05.440
Because I'm so big, you all so small? Oh God?
839
00:44:07.920 --> 00:44:10.119
Well, I hate to tell you this, but sippy cups
840
00:44:10.119 --> 00:44:13.880
have come a long way in the last twenty years
841
00:44:13.960 --> 00:44:17.480
after you've died. Some of them are quite big, big
842
00:44:17.519 --> 00:44:19.199
big sippy cups.
843
00:44:19.760 --> 00:44:24.360
Oh you're saying, Achu, how a super cup full jolly?
844
00:44:24.719 --> 00:44:27.159
If you had literally the size.
845
00:44:26.880 --> 00:44:30.360
Of it now as a punch bowl. That is not
846
00:44:30.519 --> 00:44:36.719
a super coup. That is a big beef. William de
847
00:44:36.880 --> 00:44:38.760
fall I like you are.
848
00:44:38.800 --> 00:44:41.119
You find you don't have to keep saying that you
849
00:44:41.320 --> 00:44:44.519
like me. I understand. I'll just assume that you like
850
00:44:44.639 --> 00:44:46.440
me from now on. Is that okay?
851
00:44:47.719 --> 00:44:52.039
Ah? Gool? Because pureball, they're all a friend of me,
852
00:44:52.559 --> 00:44:56.239
and I have to tell them. I argue. I will
853
00:44:56.320 --> 00:45:08.639
know across you because I argue, Ah, you're.
854
00:45:04.880 --> 00:45:08.800
Really something else. There's just an energy about you that
855
00:45:09.000 --> 00:45:13.559
you can't put your finger on. There's versatility when you're
856
00:45:13.639 --> 00:45:17.760
not looking for versatility. What makes you who you are?
857
00:45:17.960 --> 00:45:20.599
I mean, like, what gives it?
858
00:45:20.719 --> 00:45:20.880
Does?
859
00:45:21.000 --> 00:45:21.039
No?
860
00:45:21.320 --> 00:45:25.480
Mama? Who are? I have a question for your wi
861
00:45:25.840 --> 00:45:32.280
before Why does it lie to fry spiral man? Ah?
862
00:45:33.840 --> 00:45:38.599
Well that's a good question. Uh. It's not easy. It's hard.
863
00:45:39.239 --> 00:45:41.800
Some of the hours are very hard, some of the
864
00:45:41.920 --> 00:45:44.800
lines are very technical, and I'm very good at lines
865
00:45:45.000 --> 00:45:48.599
after all these years. But Spider Man's still the fastest
866
00:45:48.679 --> 00:45:51.679
thing out there, really, I mean other than things that
867
00:45:51.800 --> 00:45:55.079
can transport themselves. But we can play semantics all day
868
00:45:55.119 --> 00:45:55.960
long anyway.
869
00:45:56.480 --> 00:46:02.639
Yes, yes, did you ever know the Spider Man Ross
870
00:46:02.719 --> 00:46:06.639
Peter Parker? I did not know there, and then I
871
00:46:06.840 --> 00:46:11.400
read the comic books and I love he is a.
872
00:46:14.199 --> 00:46:18.000
Listen, It's a lot like wrestling. It's not real. I'm
873
00:46:18.119 --> 00:46:21.039
just playing a character called the Green Goblin. I'm not
874
00:46:21.199 --> 00:46:25.159
really a green Goblin, and so Spider Man's not really
875
00:46:25.480 --> 00:46:28.000
who you think he is either. He's actually a human being.
876
00:46:29.719 --> 00:46:34.639
I know there a human being there was spider a. Nah,
877
00:46:35.000 --> 00:46:39.679
he has super strength. You go with me a giant? Oh,
878
00:46:39.960 --> 00:46:45.639
he could find you at Goblin. I like that. Spider
879
00:46:45.760 --> 00:46:47.400
Man is a grudle plan.
880
00:46:47.880 --> 00:46:54.360
Yes, listen, Andre, I know you're a busy guy. We've
881
00:46:54.480 --> 00:46:58.119
talked about this before, but there's something about you that
882
00:46:58.280 --> 00:47:02.519
seems off a bit. Do you want substances or maybe alcohol?
883
00:47:02.679 --> 00:47:03.000
Right now?
884
00:47:04.320 --> 00:47:07.440
I drink wine, but that is because I am frown.
885
00:47:08.480 --> 00:47:12.599
I love wine. I drink twenty seven bottles a day.
886
00:47:13.320 --> 00:47:17.639
All there is no drunk. I was having wine.
887
00:47:18.679 --> 00:47:21.639
Yes, I suppose so but you know there's a limit.
888
00:47:21.719 --> 00:47:23.320
Everybody's got their own limits.
889
00:47:23.480 --> 00:47:27.800
So when you will before, there is no limit, especially
890
00:47:28.000 --> 00:47:32.440
for me a drive, I can drink whatever I want
891
00:47:32.800 --> 00:47:34.920
and the galleries go nowhere.
892
00:47:37.159 --> 00:47:41.760
That's something else, really great stuff. I really appreciate it, and.
893
00:47:43.360 --> 00:47:46.079
I like you, and I know I keep saying that
894
00:47:46.599 --> 00:47:49.679
because I want you the raw. I will never cross
895
00:47:49.760 --> 00:47:53.360
your head, even if I wanted to drool.
896
00:47:54.639 --> 00:47:56.559
I never thought you were going to cross my red.
897
00:47:57.159 --> 00:48:02.079
But you know I cross your hand. Herd. You're heard.
898
00:48:02.599 --> 00:48:07.079
I dig you, squawsh you squash. You like our bond.
899
00:48:07.559 --> 00:48:09.880
I don't know what it has. I don't know what
900
00:48:10.000 --> 00:48:11.519
you're saying. It makes no sense.
901
00:48:12.840 --> 00:48:16.840
You're all marking me mad. Now, I will call for you.
902
00:48:21.039 --> 00:48:25.280
I will team up with spoddle man. I will be
903
00:48:26.559 --> 00:48:33.280
and our spoiler will under fall irm me.
904
00:48:33.519 --> 00:48:37.719
Now, okay, Well, good luck finding me and good luck
905
00:48:37.760 --> 00:48:39.280
getting there. I mean, what are you going to take
906
00:48:39.320 --> 00:48:41.559
an airplane? You're not going to fit on an airplane.
907
00:48:41.719 --> 00:48:42.679
You're not gonna fit.
908
00:48:44.079 --> 00:48:44.239
Car.
909
00:48:45.039 --> 00:48:46.880
The only way someone's going to get you over here
910
00:48:46.920 --> 00:48:50.079
is if they airlift you with a set of I
911
00:48:50.159 --> 00:48:51.840
don't know, three or four helicopters.
912
00:48:52.960 --> 00:48:56.639
I will dumble drop on you and I will cross
913
00:48:56.760 --> 00:48:59.119
your herd lock her barg.
914
00:49:01.400 --> 00:49:04.360
Okay, well i'll see it. I see it tomorrow morning.
915
00:49:04.440 --> 00:49:05.400
Maybe we'll get some lunch.
916
00:49:06.679 --> 00:49:09.639
Oh n, I would like to have eggs with your
917
00:49:09.679 --> 00:49:12.320
William before you are Okay.
918
00:49:12.559 --> 00:49:18.519
Thank you too, Okay, all right, we did it.
919
00:49:20.239 --> 00:49:23.320
Great. Sorry about that. At the beginning, some of those voices,
920
00:49:23.360 --> 00:49:25.280
the Steve O thing, I thought I had longer, and
921
00:49:25.360 --> 00:49:27.039
then as I got into it, you know it, I
922
00:49:27.159 --> 00:49:29.400
was like, damn, I just like doing a couple of sentences.
923
00:49:29.480 --> 00:49:32.039
I kind of lose faith. Same with the cat. But
924
00:49:32.159 --> 00:49:35.519
everything else was so fun. That fucking god, damn it,
925
00:49:35.559 --> 00:49:39.159
you're great. That Jimmy Fallon is so I can't believe it.
926
00:49:39.559 --> 00:49:41.440
Damn ye, unbelievable, so great.
927
00:49:42.000 --> 00:49:45.519
It's so fucking funny. I was losing it. God, damn,
928
00:49:45.599 --> 00:49:47.920
you're talented. Thank you. That was really fun.
929
00:49:48.159 --> 00:49:49.880
Oh yeah, that was so great. I'm so glad you
930
00:49:49.920 --> 00:49:52.199
did the show. I mean, I've been It's just so
931
00:49:52.360 --> 00:49:54.639
fun to have somebody so good like you because it
932
00:49:54.880 --> 00:49:58.199
just makes me, uh, just try to get where you're at.
933
00:49:59.000 --> 00:50:01.199
You know now, way man, I was watching your consistency
934
00:50:01.320 --> 00:50:04.400
that Dustin Hoffman was fucking pitch perfect. It's just pitch perfect.
935
00:50:04.400 --> 00:50:05.679
Don't talked me like that.
936
00:50:06.840 --> 00:50:09.360
Yeah, that's the part that I'm like, fuck, that was good.
937
00:50:09.599 --> 00:50:12.039
Yea, But yours are great. You have a million great
938
00:50:12.119 --> 00:50:15.480
distinctive ones, and I love your material. That's the one
939
00:50:15.519 --> 00:50:18.360
thing I noticed about you that's so good is I've
940
00:50:18.400 --> 00:50:21.440
always had I've always felt like my the hardest part
941
00:50:21.480 --> 00:50:24.360
of stand up was to put these impressions in the
942
00:50:24.480 --> 00:50:25.840
right situation and.
943
00:50:26.280 --> 00:50:32.440
Yeah, yeah, it's really really fucking weird to do. Yeah,
944
00:50:32.599 --> 00:50:35.679
that's my favorite thing is like watching voices do things
945
00:50:35.719 --> 00:50:37.519
that you go, oh, he would never do. There's a
946
00:50:37.559 --> 00:50:40.719
guy that does a perfect Shilah Buff on Instagram and
947
00:50:40.840 --> 00:50:43.719
he just does like Shyla Buff working at home depot
948
00:50:43.800 --> 00:50:46.760
and it's so funny. Wow, I just love shit, Like yeah.
949
00:50:47.079 --> 00:50:50.519
But the other thing that I find to be an
950
00:50:50.599 --> 00:50:55.920
issue as in the last twenty years is nobody knows
951
00:50:56.000 --> 00:51:00.199
the same stuff, like, yeah, it's not all universe aw
952
00:51:00.280 --> 00:51:03.519
breaking bad even though you got a good one, you
953
00:51:03.639 --> 00:51:06.000
know that kind of thing. And so I'm kind of
954
00:51:06.079 --> 00:51:08.400
going more into like characters, which I know you do
955
00:51:08.440 --> 00:51:08.679
a lot of.
956
00:51:08.880 --> 00:51:11.480
Yeah, that's fun at hell, that's fun at hell, that's cool.
957
00:51:11.519 --> 00:51:14.320
I like that ship. Yeah, you're super talented with fess man,
958
00:51:14.360 --> 00:51:16.519
it's fucking crazy. Thanks for having me.
959
00:51:16.639 --> 00:51:20.519
Yeah, thanks for doing it. Yeah awesome, and just.
960
00:51:20.559 --> 00:51:22.519
Let me clip it or clip it and then send
961
00:51:22.559 --> 00:51:24.800
it to me, you know, fucking you know repost.
962
00:51:24.519 --> 00:51:27.320
All right, sounds good, All right, I'll talk to you. Thanks,
963
00:51:27.360 --> 00:51:29.000
and you know this is part of it too, write
964
00:51:29.239 --> 00:51:30.079
what we've been talking.
965
00:51:31.079 --> 00:51:37.639
Oh, hell yeah, it's awesome. Yeah, absolutely, Oh, I guess
966
00:51:37.719 --> 00:51:41.119
can you cut the thing about the would you mind
967
00:51:41.159 --> 00:51:44.039
cutting the part out about the when I out fucking
968
00:51:45.039 --> 00:51:49.239
and then going thanks dude, I appreciate it. All right,
969
00:51:49.320 --> 00:51:49.840
Bye Jeff
1
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I don't know. I'll never get used to this video
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camera thing. It It used to be inside the computer,
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and now what seems to be the case is it
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seems to be on top of the computer with a
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long cord that you can trip yourself on, which I've
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done and continue to do and will continue to do
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through the end of time. And that's okay, and that's fine.
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But to have had the incidents I've had with the internet,
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you know, shoddy production types of instruments, misheld, misused. I
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let my son use his friends as the production universe.
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It just it just there was no there was no
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particular rhyme or reason to it. Yet here I am
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Dave stuck in the middle of it, and I think
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that's a song. And I don't know for sure, but
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I do believe. I do believe. I do believe that's
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that's a song. Uh So, so what we're doing here
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is it's basically stalling for time. We've begun the show.
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The show's started in full effect. And uh we are
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we are a particular we are a particular nation. We're
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a particular set of individuals with principles and and so
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on and so forth. But when we get in front
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of the video camera. We're just mush, We're just We're
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just cannon fodder. We're just We're just We're just a
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guy with half a foot and half a sandwich and
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and not a prayer in hell. There's just nothing he
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can do about it. So I want to give a prayer.
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I want to give solitude. I want to give gratefulness.
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I want to give all those things. And I am
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just honored and tickled to death to be the first
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a guest on this show who I will now interview,
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and I believe he's gonna interview me. I don't know
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exactly I got here late, so let's bring him on.
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My first guest was a WWF wrestler for years, he
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retired and he is now a controversial individual in terms
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of the slim Gym nation and those who are continuing
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on his preservation. Please please welcome mister Randy macho man, savage,
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nice going.
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Very nice to meet you. Yeah, David Litterman, uh huh,
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the original champion of Late Night. I ain't talking about Corson,
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I'm not talking about Jack poloriah. You gotta go back
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to Indiana to get the best of the best, the
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cream of the crop David Litterman. Yeah, Jay Leno was
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your whole Cogan. Uh could have been a mega power
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situation and instead it's a Ristlemania five situation. Yeah.
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How you listen after that expose? I just feel like
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cuddling with a kitten, and I don't know which kitten,
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and I don't care.
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The left field? Yeah, why I love you?
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Do you have? By the way, I should ask where
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are the bagpipes?
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You're thinking of a different man. You're thinking of rowdy
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rowdy piper. Yeah, a man that I've met in the
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squared circle several times. Uhhhh, a titan of the industry,
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but not me. He's not the macho being reading these savage.
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And what what makes Randy the macho man?
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Is it?
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Is it for the mere fact that you are, uh
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a macho or is it something beyond that?
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Yeah? Like everything great, you gotta start with the foundation. Ah,
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I'm talking about a foundation of greatness. Yeah, and my
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foundation is being macho. My foundation is being a man. Yeah.
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What I've built from that, uh huh reaches to the sky.
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Dig it.
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And dig it means what should should I should I
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go dig something?
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Uh? It's a positive affirmation it's a way of agreeing.
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It's a way of going along with the beat of
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the band. And the beat goes on, and the beat
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goes on.
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And how about your hair? And by the way, are
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you dead or not? I don't know. I don't know
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if I'm dead.
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I'm in the astral place. Yeah, I'm in a place
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between heaven and hell. Yeah, between the top and the bottom.
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I'm not on the lid on the plane of the living,
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and instead I'm on a different thing, a different cellular mechanism. Yeah,
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I'm talking about a different part of existence. Yeah, that's
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where the macho man is and where he is always been. Ah,
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And what.
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Do you do with your days? I would guess tea
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and a top side pool is not part of it?
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Or are do you stretch?
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What type of There's a lot of uh, a lot
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of different things going to be in the macho me.
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Watch you're your diet, making sure your body is in
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an excellence and also a lot of jeneromi. Yeah.
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And I hate to keep asking questions because I'm already
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asking questions. But what the hell, what the hell are
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you talking about? It just doesn't make any sense. It
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doesn't make any damn sense I don't get it.
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You gotta find the middle of the maze. You gotta
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get lost. Uh huh. I'm talking about a compass with
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no direction. Yeah, I'm thinking up us down and left
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is right, Yeah, every which way bought up. Yeah, that
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is my favorite Richard Pryor movie.
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Richard was a guest on my show several times, and
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I remember I remember looking at Richard and thinking, God,
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this guy probably smells pretty good, but I can't get
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close enough to find out. Have you been around people,
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specifically the the WWF wrestlers that have been kind of
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have an odor or maybe one of them smells pretty good.
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A lot of big men in the ww LEFT, Yeah,
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a lot of my competition the size of big men. Yeah,
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and they smell like big men. Yeah. It's like if
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you put ham in gasoline. I'm talking about raw meat,
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meat with fuel. Yeah, that's the combination. That's the aroma.
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That's steroids.
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Hold on, hold on a second, backup.
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I'm talking sand with you.
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You're talking I'm talking you're talking capricola.
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I'm talking black forest Ham. I'm talking about every single
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warhead flavor.
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Yeah, okay, so so black forest, but there's other varieties
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of ham. I assume I used to do a canned ham.
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I don't know if you remember that, but we would.
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You're not talking about actual pig products. Yeah, you're talking
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about scientific meat. Yeah, you're talking about the meat that's
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made in a lab. I'm talking about spam and not
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the email. I'm talking about the food out of a can. Yeah,
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ain't real, never been real. Dig it.
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That's just that's just fantastic and that and that. That's
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a particular set of gestures I would hope from somebody
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like you, because you had a long run with the
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slim gem thing. How many slim gems do you think
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you have? Put down your gullet?
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A little bit of an industry secret. Yeah, an industry
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secret is you take the bite, but you never swallow. Yeah,
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you don't let the poison into your body. Uh huh.
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Slim Gym gave me a lot of money, but never
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did I eat one. Never once did I take a
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slim Gym into my stomach. Ah.
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And because for what various reason? Is there a various reason.
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It's not made of meat? Yeah, it's people. I'm talking
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about people from below the southern hemisphere, people without social
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Security numbers, disappearing and then becoming flavored beef. Yeah.
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So these people die and I don't know how they die,
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but they do, in fact die. There's not living people
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in Slide and Slide the slim gems see what I'm doing.
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I love it. I love the little wordplay.
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But how do they get these people? I mean, they
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don't necessarily volunteer their bodies to the slim gym factory?
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Do they industry secret a lot of creed or a
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lot of grieve Robin. Yeah, coming into where you're laid
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to rest, they pop you out and see if you
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still got meat on your bones.
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Yeah, Well that's just something. Isn't that just something? But
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it's just it's wonderful, wonderful, wonderful to have you on
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the show, and it's just it's it's extra special that
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it could be here over the internet as impersonal as possible.
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Through the greatness of the Internet.
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So let's uh, We're gonna go to the next thing.
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The next thing is uh, jeez, I'm all over the place.
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This is weird. I feel weird. Okay, I think you
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knew who I am. If you didn't know who I am,
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watch the movies RoboCop, No just kidding. I'm iron Man. Thanks.
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I feel good. I'm like I dance around. You would
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think I was something else, but I'm not. I have
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a wife. So with me, there's with me today is
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this is This is the kind of algorithm you can
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get into and then you don't really know what you're doing.
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And that's why I make my eyes go up towards
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the sailing because I have to tinkle. And it's not
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it's not necessarily true. I forgot what your name is.
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I feel so bad.
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Well, miho. People call me a lot of things, but
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well the ones they always call me is never late
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for dinner. No, you can call me sam. My name
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is Samuel Elliott. Surprisingly, I'm from Portland, Oregon. Not a
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lot of people know that. They think I'm from the
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hills of Colorado or a storm dusted mountain in Montana.
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Well, you sound like storm drain. And also you're lighting.
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I don't know if you're trying to do a silhouette
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picture for like a Calvin kleinad, but you are doing
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If we could change the lighting, and I know this
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is in real time, but it's just could we change
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the lighting? Can we change your lighting?
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Well, I didn't know this was such a visually important thing, man,
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And I don't really know if I can here. Let
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me see if my friend old blinds can come down.
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The thing about blinds is they can block out the
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sun and they can make it the lighting a whole lot.
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Well, Sam, Sam, that's actually that's not bad. I like
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the lighting, but I do It's okay. I think that
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could work.
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I would say, Oh, it's going to be your only option.
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Brother, I'm deep faking this and I'm a defic artist
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and I'm doing the deficive. The thing is to take
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the microphone and just go a little below your chin.
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Oh that's perfect. She Now, from from now on we
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can definke it. But I love I didn't even.
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I want to apologize for not knowing the reason your
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questions where you were going. I'm a little older now,
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I don't really have grasp of time and really what's
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going on. So I didn't know what you were doing.
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I thought you were trying to sell me gold like
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the television's been doing for the last fifteen years every
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time I'm up late, damn, trying to buy them gold
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with an American ego on it, maybe even a buffalo
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from the wild West. What do you know?
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What do you attribute your speech to? Because when I
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listen to you, I would think there's something in your
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mouth other than your tongue.
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I usually have a bit out six to seven worthers originals,
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packing out my gums to make sure that the taste
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of caramel is never not in my mouth. Also, I've
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had a series of many strokes that everyone thought was
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a cowboy way of life, but really it was a
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brain lack of blood and oxygen for over fifteen minutes
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real time. And you get voiceover work, Well, a lot
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of that is them sneaking into the home that I
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live in and telling me that if I talk to
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my son about this product that he'll get me out.
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So I don't really know. I'm not trying to sell
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nothing as much as I am trying to be reunited
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with my family.
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And just for the record, you didn't just wake up.
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This is how you sound you. What do you sound
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like when you wake up?
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Well, it's usually more of a low rumble, kind of
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like the earth is moving below you. A lot of times,
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my Filipino nurse will wake me up by saying mister Elliott,
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mister e as she calls me it's time for your medicine,
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and at that point of the day, my voice is
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just and it takes her. I've been told I sound
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like a sleepy digery do. I've been told that I
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sound nothing like a human being.
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Okay, let's stop at didgerido. I don't know. Is that
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a donut shop? What is that? What is that is that?
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In like Stockton, California.
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Oh, there's a lot to learn in this world, especially
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the world of music. And well, miho, A dijury do
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is like if you took a flute and made it
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a man. If you took a flute and said, I
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don't need you peeing, sitting down, stand up, shake yourself
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when you're and leaves your body, that's a didgery do.
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Okay, still very confused. Didn't even get close to what
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a did we do is? And what does a did
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we do?
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Well, I'll tell you what a digitary don't, and it does.
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Digital don't deal with bullshit. It doesn't suffer fools. That's
241
00:14:20.759 --> 00:14:24.000
what I like about a digitally do. Let me ask
242
00:14:24.039 --> 00:14:28.399
you a question, mister Tony Stark, how much are you
243
00:14:28.639 --> 00:14:32.480
made of iron? Well?
244
00:14:32.559 --> 00:14:35.159
Right now, almost nothing, because I have my Jammy's on.
245
00:14:36.360 --> 00:14:40.080
But so if you're not in the suit, you're no iron.
246
00:14:40.200 --> 00:14:42.639
If I'm not in the suit, I'm like Darth Vader's face.
247
00:14:43.919 --> 00:14:48.039
Yeah, I knew a girl who had a face like
248
00:14:48.120 --> 00:14:51.120
Darth Vader. It was a different time and we were
249
00:14:51.159 --> 00:14:54.360
out in the West. She had a face that looked
250
00:14:54.399 --> 00:14:56.960
like it had fallen off a car and hit every
251
00:14:57.080 --> 00:15:00.200
piece of road and gravel on the way out out.
252
00:15:01.200 --> 00:15:04.720
She was an ugly woman, but a fair woman. I
253
00:15:04.799 --> 00:15:07.039
respected her. I miss her.
254
00:15:07.759 --> 00:15:10.080
What happened to her?
255
00:15:10.639 --> 00:15:13.799
I think she moved to Sacramento, she got transfer. She
256
00:15:13.919 --> 00:15:17.399
worked in insurance and they move around a lot. She
257
00:15:17.559 --> 00:15:19.639
was still a hideous woman.
258
00:15:19.919 --> 00:15:20.320
Hideous.
259
00:15:20.360 --> 00:15:20.519
You know.
260
00:15:20.559 --> 00:15:22.600
It's like some people look better when they get older.
261
00:15:24.600 --> 00:15:28.039
But you know, I think the the basic like makeup
262
00:15:28.080 --> 00:15:29.960
routine or if you're going to use a scrub or
263
00:15:29.960 --> 00:15:33.600
like facial cleanser, is to go facial cleanser every other day,
264
00:15:33.759 --> 00:15:37.159
scrub every day, moisturizer every third day.
265
00:15:38.279 --> 00:15:42.360
I like, how much you know about keeping your face clean.
266
00:15:42.559 --> 00:15:45.840
That's a man that cares about how he's perceived, and
267
00:15:45.919 --> 00:15:48.279
that's the first step into getting to know him someone.
268
00:15:48.320 --> 00:15:49.799
And I like that you do that.
269
00:15:50.519 --> 00:15:54.039
Well, it's it's it's sort of reminiscent of that. I
270
00:15:54.039 --> 00:15:55.600
don't know if you've seen it on TV. They've got
271
00:15:55.600 --> 00:15:58.799
the the fix. You can fix your tire. You could
272
00:15:58.840 --> 00:16:01.320
fix it on even on the even the spectrum.
273
00:16:02.360 --> 00:16:04.919
I love a fix. I love a tire fix, whether
274
00:16:04.960 --> 00:16:09.039
it's rubber or I like fixing problems like what should
275
00:16:09.080 --> 00:16:16.159
have problems well mathematical. I'm a big fan of Sudoku
276
00:16:16.960 --> 00:16:21.200
other brain games that make me remember my past.
277
00:16:22.600 --> 00:16:24.600
So you would say you're in touch with your past
278
00:16:24.840 --> 00:16:29.879
and your memory seems intact, and you're eating what are
279
00:16:29.919 --> 00:16:30.320
you eating?
280
00:16:31.320 --> 00:16:34.559
I eat nothing but beef, sometimes pork, it's the other
281
00:16:34.639 --> 00:16:39.720
white meat, and sometimes well sometimes I'll just chew on
282
00:16:39.799 --> 00:16:42.639
a stick. But most of the time I'm doing that.
283
00:16:42.960 --> 00:16:45.600
It's when someone finds me under the one oh one
284
00:16:46.360 --> 00:16:50.440
and I've been there for days, talking to myself, chewing
285
00:16:50.519 --> 00:16:51.159
on wood.
286
00:16:51.879 --> 00:16:53.679
Where do you get your sticks?
287
00:16:55.080 --> 00:16:57.759
From? Different places? A lot of the times just from
288
00:16:57.799 --> 00:17:00.519
the side of the road. I'm like a Golden retriever
289
00:17:00.879 --> 00:17:04.160
or a labrador. I can find a large stick and
290
00:17:04.240 --> 00:17:08.920
it becomes my friend, my close pal, someone i can
291
00:17:09.000 --> 00:17:12.279
talk to when I'm real loud of it, or someone
292
00:17:12.319 --> 00:17:14.480
i can just chew on when I need.
293
00:17:14.359 --> 00:17:18.559
To you live a very intricate life. I would guess
294
00:17:18.640 --> 00:17:21.279
that you're in your you're in your eighties now.
295
00:17:22.559 --> 00:17:25.160
I'm one hundred and forty eight years old. I was
296
00:17:25.240 --> 00:17:30.519
born a time when warlocks and sorcerers walk the earth.
297
00:17:31.279 --> 00:17:34.200
My mother was a maiden, and a fair one at that.
298
00:17:34.519 --> 00:17:38.720
And someone said, well, you're cursed to have an immortal son,
299
00:17:39.319 --> 00:17:43.519
but else stale his entire life. And well, my mother
300
00:17:43.599 --> 00:17:46.279
hid me from the wives men in the village and
301
00:17:46.359 --> 00:17:51.519
from the evil sorcerer. I think it's time for my pills.
302
00:17:52.119 --> 00:17:55.680
Well that's that's the way we go. I mean, you
303
00:17:55.839 --> 00:17:58.279
have to take your pills. And to think about pills,
304
00:17:58.319 --> 00:17:59.880
are you got to use water? And if you're gonna
305
00:17:59.920 --> 00:18:02.519
use water, grape juice or some maybe chocolate milk, you
306
00:18:02.640 --> 00:18:04.119
got to get enough of a gulf in there to
307
00:18:04.160 --> 00:18:07.440
get those pills down. So sam Uh, I wish you
308
00:18:07.480 --> 00:18:09.640
the best. I hope you have a big enough golf
309
00:18:09.720 --> 00:18:11.240
to get those pills down.
310
00:18:12.519 --> 00:18:14.200
I know we're having a lot of fun here, but
311
00:18:14.240 --> 00:18:18.200
I truly look forward to you playing Doctor Doom, and
312
00:18:18.279 --> 00:18:20.680
I hope that when you're a Doctor Doom, you know
313
00:18:20.759 --> 00:18:25.920
that the Fantastic Four well, there's four family members trying
314
00:18:25.960 --> 00:18:29.799
to make it through it, you know, like all of us.
315
00:18:30.359 --> 00:18:33.480
Well, spoiler alert, they're not all fantastic. But you know
316
00:18:33.519 --> 00:18:36.039
what I think you are. I think you're real cool.
317
00:18:37.359 --> 00:18:39.799
I like you, Robert, you're a good man.
318
00:18:40.000 --> 00:18:42.559
Okay, let me get the piece of paper that's on
319
00:18:42.599 --> 00:18:43.039
the ground.
320
00:18:44.240 --> 00:18:55.079
Go ahead, hold on, hold on, hold on a suck
321
00:18:55.079 --> 00:18:56.400
and we're going to settle in.
322
00:18:57.359 --> 00:18:58.480
I don't want to I don't want to put my
323
00:18:58.640 --> 00:19:01.160
arm Debbie, what am I gonna put? My arms? Are
324
00:19:01.200 --> 00:19:05.799
on the table or not on the table. All right,
325
00:19:05.880 --> 00:19:09.480
let's get started. This is Dustin Hoffman.
326
00:19:11.079 --> 00:19:12.440
I know who you is, bitch.
327
00:19:12.519 --> 00:19:15.160
I've been watching you since you got seduced by your
328
00:19:15.160 --> 00:19:16.160
girlfriend's mama.
329
00:19:16.480 --> 00:19:17.920
You should have never fucked the bitch.
330
00:19:18.160 --> 00:19:20.000
You should have let him give you head and then
331
00:19:20.079 --> 00:19:21.880
taken off your stupid motherfucker.
332
00:19:22.000 --> 00:19:24.119
Well, everybody loves head.
333
00:19:24.960 --> 00:19:27.519
I don't know Pimping. I don't know a single person
334
00:19:27.559 --> 00:19:28.720
that doesn't love head.
335
00:19:28.920 --> 00:19:29.519
I love it.
336
00:19:30.880 --> 00:19:33.000
First off, I think we're about the same height.
337
00:19:33.599 --> 00:19:33.839
Are you?
338
00:19:34.359 --> 00:19:34.880
How tall?
339
00:19:34.880 --> 00:19:38.319
Are you five two and a half, Pimping.
340
00:19:38.200 --> 00:19:39.640
I'm a little taller.
341
00:19:41.519 --> 00:19:43.839
Well, if we were, if we will find each other,
342
00:19:43.880 --> 00:19:45.680
it would be a micro brawl.
343
00:19:46.799 --> 00:19:49.720
With all those that's supposed to be I don't know.
344
00:19:49.839 --> 00:19:53.559
I've been up for seventeen days reading eight and seven books.
345
00:19:53.960 --> 00:19:59.920
You're very very ferocious leader or or is it a vorocious?
346
00:20:00.319 --> 00:20:03.119
What is it voracious or vorocious? You read a lot
347
00:20:03.160 --> 00:20:03.640
of books.
348
00:20:04.480 --> 00:20:08.079
I knew bitches named vorocious and voracious. I've known bitches
349
00:20:08.160 --> 00:20:13.920
named vorocious, voracious, venomous, vell That's a made up word
350
00:20:14.000 --> 00:20:17.319
I just created. I'm like Terrence Howard, but with languages
351
00:20:18.279 --> 00:20:19.079
very colorful.
352
00:20:19.440 --> 00:20:21.759
You're very colorful, You're very animated, and.
353
00:20:21.680 --> 00:20:24.319
Then you I'm very tiny, very angry, pimping.
354
00:20:24.519 --> 00:20:27.880
Well, you speak your mind, you you give you give
355
00:20:27.880 --> 00:20:31.039
a direct information. You're always giving direct information. Where do
356
00:20:31.039 --> 00:20:32.799
you get your direct information from?
357
00:20:33.640 --> 00:20:36.599
Because if you don't, these bitches go sideways on you. Dustin,
358
00:20:36.680 --> 00:20:39.480
Why have you not learned anything I've been saying. If
359
00:20:39.559 --> 00:20:42.039
you don't stay on them, then you gotta stay off
360
00:20:42.079 --> 00:20:44.839
of them because they become toxic for a player, for
361
00:20:44.920 --> 00:20:45.559
a play boy.
362
00:20:46.319 --> 00:20:48.680
But you get away with it because you're you're you're
363
00:20:48.759 --> 00:20:52.200
kind of a small figure. You're you're I mean stature,
364
00:20:52.279 --> 00:20:54.319
I mean just like you know, you're like a little guy.
365
00:20:55.480 --> 00:20:57.839
Bitches will never know when they're gonna get smacked by
366
00:20:57.880 --> 00:21:00.839
me because I come up and under, up under like
367
00:21:00.880 --> 00:21:01.559
a recession.
368
00:21:01.720 --> 00:21:03.559
Up in that bitch, right in that chin.
369
00:21:04.519 --> 00:21:06.799
Why do you get so upset? You seem very upset
370
00:21:06.880 --> 00:21:07.960
or is there something under?
371
00:21:08.279 --> 00:21:08.759
I want to.
372
00:21:08.720 --> 00:21:11.680
Reach things I want to touch. What's in a cabinet
373
00:21:11.680 --> 00:21:15.319
above my refrigerator. I got seven houses. I don't know
374
00:21:15.359 --> 00:21:18.119
where the cookies are. I ain't never known where the
375
00:21:18.160 --> 00:21:21.720
cookies are. It's a real problem when a pimp can't
376
00:21:21.720 --> 00:21:25.000
have I'm a nice Pepperidge Farm cookie.
377
00:21:25.519 --> 00:21:28.000
I want a Milano. I want to double milano.
378
00:21:28.079 --> 00:21:29.440
Bitch, I want to listen milano.
379
00:21:31.319 --> 00:21:33.440
I had a you can have a back.
380
00:21:33.759 --> 00:21:37.000
Barry Zito was a friend, and then I took her
381
00:21:37.039 --> 00:21:37.640
from him.
382
00:21:38.119 --> 00:21:40.359
I said, motherfucker, you can't throw a fastball.
383
00:21:40.519 --> 00:21:44.240
You don't deserve Samantha from Who's the boss, And you
384
00:21:44.279 --> 00:21:45.440
know who the boss is?
385
00:21:45.799 --> 00:21:47.680
It's me, pimping Kat Williams.
386
00:21:48.039 --> 00:21:50.119
I think you're upset because you're not getting the cookies
387
00:21:50.160 --> 00:21:50.960
that you can't find.
388
00:21:51.720 --> 00:21:52.079
I want.
389
00:21:52.119 --> 00:21:55.480
The cookie is dustined. You can count matches on the ground.
390
00:21:55.720 --> 00:21:57.519
Tell me why I can't get to the top of
391
00:21:57.559 --> 00:22:00.160
the refrigerator to know where my ym yums are.
392
00:22:00.480 --> 00:22:04.400
But don't forget slonely at the top, and you you
393
00:22:04.400 --> 00:22:06.960
you you've been at the top, you might even considerably
394
00:22:07.000 --> 00:22:09.599
still be on some level that you're still on top.
395
00:22:10.799 --> 00:22:14.279
I love what you're saying, but there's there's a.
396
00:22:14.359 --> 00:22:17.680
There's something in you, there's something in you that's that's
397
00:22:18.039 --> 00:22:20.759
riled up. And I don't know where that comes from.
398
00:22:20.799 --> 00:22:22.799
I don't know, you know, I don't know if it's
399
00:22:22.880 --> 00:22:24.720
it's something you can buy. I don't know if it's
400
00:22:24.720 --> 00:22:28.960
something you can wear, like a sweatshirt. But I think.
401
00:22:30.359 --> 00:22:32.680
I try to, I try to think of what it is,
402
00:22:32.880 --> 00:22:35.319
and every time I think, I think it's my hats,
403
00:22:35.640 --> 00:22:39.960
my hats. I wear so many hats. I'm a pimp,
404
00:22:40.000 --> 00:22:43.000
I'm a comedian, I'm a superstar, I'm everything. But I
405
00:22:43.039 --> 00:22:44.279
can't just get my cookies.
406
00:22:45.640 --> 00:22:48.319
You can't just order them on or like go on
407
00:22:48.799 --> 00:22:50.160
uber eats.
408
00:22:50.720 --> 00:22:53.039
I'm not allowed to have apps on my phone.
409
00:22:53.599 --> 00:22:56.400
My bitch is bigger than me, so she controls everything
410
00:22:56.440 --> 00:22:57.480
that's on my phone.
411
00:22:57.759 --> 00:23:00.920
This is not Isn't that something? Here's a guy, top
412
00:23:01.000 --> 00:23:06.000
of his class, comedian, outspoken, very funny, can't get any cookies.
413
00:23:08.279 --> 00:23:11.160
I've said it since the beginning, if a pimp could
414
00:23:11.160 --> 00:23:13.799
get a cookie, the next thing, I want a glass
415
00:23:13.799 --> 00:23:16.160
of milk. And then after a glass of milk, I
416
00:23:16.200 --> 00:23:18.920
want that pussy. That's what I'm coming for, a bitch,
417
00:23:19.440 --> 00:23:22.680
Give a pimper cookie, Give a pimper cookie, we will
418
00:23:22.759 --> 00:23:25.000
get it, and he'll demand a glass of milk.
419
00:23:25.359 --> 00:23:27.200
It sounds like you need some pussy milk.
420
00:23:28.519 --> 00:23:31.240
Pussy milk is the hardest milk to get. And you
421
00:23:31.359 --> 00:23:34.079
know that, Dustin Hoffman, You've been in the Illuminati since
422
00:23:34.279 --> 00:23:35.880
nineteen sixty one.
423
00:23:36.519 --> 00:23:38.079
Come, don't, don't don't.
424
00:23:38.720 --> 00:23:41.839
Oh, I know you've been there, you and Simon and Goldfunk. Oh,
425
00:23:41.880 --> 00:23:45.240
you nasty ass motherfuck I knew what you was doing
426
00:23:45.279 --> 00:23:46.160
in the woods.
427
00:23:47.240 --> 00:23:50.160
Just let's let's get back. Let's let's get back to
428
00:23:50.200 --> 00:23:50.880
pussy milk.
429
00:23:52.119 --> 00:23:54.720
I love it. I want to bathe in it. If
430
00:23:54.720 --> 00:23:55.960
I could, I would sleep in it.
431
00:23:56.000 --> 00:23:59.200
I would have a waterbed made of pussy milk just
432
00:23:59.279 --> 00:24:01.839
right under there, feel the sloush of pussy milk.
433
00:24:01.920 --> 00:24:04.079
Bitch, did you call me a bitch?
434
00:24:05.000 --> 00:24:05.200
Oh?
435
00:24:05.400 --> 00:24:08.880
Never, mister Hoffman, I would never do that. I love you,
436
00:24:08.960 --> 00:24:12.640
and and your catalog of acting has inspired me to
437
00:24:12.799 --> 00:24:17.440
treat bitches better, to treat the motherfuckers in my in
438
00:24:17.559 --> 00:24:21.759
my crew better man. This is tough not to say
439
00:24:21.759 --> 00:24:24.680
the N word. I've been trying not to say that.
440
00:24:25.119 --> 00:24:31.000
Literally literally, not saying it is very difficult, very difficult,
441
00:24:31.240 --> 00:24:33.480
very difficult, very difficult.
442
00:24:34.640 --> 00:24:37.119
But I think you're going Are you going through a
443
00:24:37.160 --> 00:24:38.000
lot of dustin.
444
00:24:37.839 --> 00:24:41.039
How I'm going through. I'm going through my old baseball cards.
445
00:24:42.079 --> 00:24:43.240
Oh, that's a lot of fun.
446
00:24:43.519 --> 00:24:43.720
Yeah.
447
00:24:43.720 --> 00:24:45.640
I found a find of Ty Cobb.
448
00:24:47.640 --> 00:24:50.960
He was a great player. Was he the racist one?
449
00:24:51.440 --> 00:24:51.640
Uh?
450
00:24:52.039 --> 00:24:55.200
Well he had he had he would yeah, yeah, I
451
00:24:55.240 --> 00:24:59.279
think so. Yeah, he had Uh he had very big hands,
452
00:24:59.400 --> 00:25:02.079
very large hands, very big knuckles. And I remember he
453
00:25:02.119 --> 00:25:05.119
would shadows. It would it would put a shadow on
454
00:25:05.200 --> 00:25:09.079
his on his hands so it didn't look like he
455
00:25:09.200 --> 00:25:11.359
would make up. He would put shadow on his hands
456
00:25:11.359 --> 00:25:14.759
so it didn't look like he was had these big hands.
457
00:25:17.079 --> 00:25:18.599
That's the way to hide it. I do that with
458
00:25:18.640 --> 00:25:21.759
bitches with big clits. I say, don't show it, hide it.
459
00:25:21.839 --> 00:25:23.039
I want you to hide it for me.
460
00:25:23.119 --> 00:25:23.400
Baby.
461
00:25:23.480 --> 00:25:25.759
You gotta hide your clip. You gotta hide your clip.
462
00:25:26.599 --> 00:25:29.279
Do you think enough people are hiding their clits?
463
00:25:29.839 --> 00:25:31.920
I think that's why the world is in the place
464
00:25:31.960 --> 00:25:35.039
that it's in all these big clip bitches walking around
465
00:25:35.079 --> 00:25:35.680
proud of it.
466
00:25:35.759 --> 00:25:41.160
Pimman, they're all on their own clits. You know there,
467
00:25:41.200 --> 00:25:43.880
I think you can be you can because I played
468
00:25:43.880 --> 00:25:46.119
a woman. I played a woman in the movie Tutsie,
469
00:25:46.440 --> 00:25:49.480
and I remember being as a woman. I could feel something.
470
00:25:49.279 --> 00:25:51.640
A beautiful woman, A bad bitch.
471
00:25:51.480 --> 00:25:53.480
Thank you very much. But they did a lot of
472
00:25:53.519 --> 00:25:56.319
makeup and like again with the ty Cobb's hand, it
473
00:25:56.359 --> 00:25:59.440
would they would shadow my face and my trying to
474
00:25:59.480 --> 00:26:03.039
make me look colnor anguiler. I had to get in there.
475
00:26:03.079 --> 00:26:04.799
I had to go like four hours early just to
476
00:26:04.799 --> 00:26:07.680
do makeup tests when we were shooting. And because you
477
00:26:07.720 --> 00:26:10.119
didn't know what to do with me, because because because
478
00:26:10.200 --> 00:26:12.839
you know, I just don't. I just I just I'm
479
00:26:12.880 --> 00:26:15.559
just too I'm just not right.
480
00:26:17.119 --> 00:26:19.160
You're a lot of man. You too much man to
481
00:26:19.279 --> 00:26:19.759
lock down.
482
00:26:19.759 --> 00:26:21.400
That's why they had to put you in a little
483
00:26:21.440 --> 00:26:22.880
body because you're too much.
484
00:26:23.039 --> 00:26:24.960
Because I'm not as small as you are, right and
485
00:26:25.160 --> 00:26:25.759
take it easy.
486
00:26:26.079 --> 00:26:27.519
I don't. Let's not get into this.
487
00:26:27.720 --> 00:26:29.680
Let's get into it. Why don't we get into it?
488
00:26:29.759 --> 00:26:31.319
I can't.
489
00:26:31.519 --> 00:26:34.039
I think I've reached my maximum with you. Dustin Hoffman.
490
00:26:34.440 --> 00:26:36.319
You're a good man. All right, but I.
491
00:26:36.279 --> 00:26:38.000
Gotta get back. I gotta get my cookie.
492
00:26:38.079 --> 00:26:39.200
You're right, I gotta go to.
493
00:26:43.839 --> 00:26:44.160
DVD.
494
00:26:44.240 --> 00:26:51.200
Dowdy Day, Dowd one two three, Dewity Up two three.
495
00:26:53.480 --> 00:26:55.240
Hey man, I'm just gonna tell you I don't even
496
00:26:55.279 --> 00:26:58.200
know what the hell you're talking about. You know, like,
497
00:26:58.240 --> 00:27:00.400
I've been hitting the head a lot, and I'm like
498
00:27:00.720 --> 00:27:02.440
beat up and stuff.
499
00:27:02.680 --> 00:27:06.480
We've both been through it. I had two motorcycle accidents
500
00:27:06.799 --> 00:27:08.640
and I couldn't I couldn't know where I was for
501
00:27:08.680 --> 00:27:11.079
about three weeks. And once I realized where I was
502
00:27:11.839 --> 00:27:13.759
and I ordered a subway sandwich.
503
00:27:15.279 --> 00:27:18.240
What's crazy is I remember we tried to get you
504
00:27:18.279 --> 00:27:21.559
on Jackass and they were like, dude, he's not even
505
00:27:21.559 --> 00:27:23.200
gonna try to come on here.
506
00:27:24.160 --> 00:27:26.240
Well, a lot of things going on, you know. I
507
00:27:26.279 --> 00:27:28.880
was born in Goose Creek, Texas in nineteen forty four,
508
00:27:28.920 --> 00:27:31.920
and I don't even know anything about anything. That's what
509
00:27:32.000 --> 00:27:34.119
I say to people. Let me keep sleeping. I'm not
510
00:27:34.160 --> 00:27:34.920
going to go anywhere.
511
00:27:34.920 --> 00:27:36.000
I don't want to do anything.
512
00:27:36.440 --> 00:27:37.400
Diamond Ring, I.
513
00:27:37.440 --> 00:27:39.920
Love that I can rhyme. You know how to rhyme.
514
00:27:41.160 --> 00:27:41.640
I know how.
515
00:27:41.920 --> 00:27:43.640
I don't really know how to rhyme, but I do
516
00:27:43.799 --> 00:27:47.240
know that, like if someone wants to like put something outside,
517
00:27:47.440 --> 00:27:47.799
I can.
518
00:27:47.799 --> 00:27:51.039
Like run it. I'll run through glass to get it.
519
00:27:51.200 --> 00:27:52.680
Have you ever ran through glass?
520
00:27:52.839 --> 00:27:56.880
Gary Busey, Yeah, a few times on accident, but I
521
00:27:57.559 --> 00:28:00.480
realized I was running on glass when I fell out
522
00:28:00.519 --> 00:28:01.160
my ash.
523
00:28:02.319 --> 00:28:05.359
Oh you're kind of like that broken Glass.
524
00:28:04.920 --> 00:28:05.559
Song by.
525
00:28:07.279 --> 00:28:15.160
Like I'm walking walking, walking on walking, like I'm walking
526
00:28:15.240 --> 00:28:19.279
on broke and.
527
00:28:17.759 --> 00:28:19.559
I'd be like, hey, what's up. This is Steve O,
528
00:28:19.880 --> 00:28:25.920
and this is I was getting called bro But yeah, you're.
529
00:28:25.680 --> 00:28:28.880
You're Gary Gary b Hi, I'm Gary bch You want
530
00:28:28.880 --> 00:28:31.160
to go? You want to go get a steak shandwich
531
00:28:31.240 --> 00:28:31.480
with me?
532
00:28:33.319 --> 00:28:35.680
I can't believe I'm going to do this, but I
533
00:28:35.880 --> 00:28:38.480
just know that STEVEO had to leave because I don't
534
00:28:38.519 --> 00:28:41.279
believe Steve O was actually here for a minute. And
535
00:28:41.279 --> 00:28:43.920
I'm sorry to do this to you, but it was
536
00:28:44.599 --> 00:28:47.480
I couldn't believe that Steve O was talking to Gary Bucy,
537
00:28:47.720 --> 00:28:50.640
so I had to cut in and say, I'm Dave
538
00:28:50.720 --> 00:28:54.759
Chappelle and I'm easily the biggest fan of yours. I've
539
00:28:54.799 --> 00:28:58.839
loved you in everything you've ever done and point break
540
00:28:59.559 --> 00:29:03.440
Predator too. You the craziest motherfucker I've ever seen in
541
00:29:03.480 --> 00:29:08.559
my life, and I need it. Gary Busey, you made it.
542
00:29:08.680 --> 00:29:09.240
You made it.
543
00:29:09.720 --> 00:29:12.319
You ever make an omelet with deer meat and then
544
00:29:12.359 --> 00:29:14.640
you forget it's on your floor and then you pick
545
00:29:14.680 --> 00:29:17.000
it up and you try to microwave it, but you
546
00:29:17.039 --> 00:29:18.519
forgot where the microwave was.
547
00:29:19.799 --> 00:29:21.839
That's the kind of crazy shit that I like that
548
00:29:21.880 --> 00:29:24.240
comes out of your mouth because I have no idea
549
00:29:24.359 --> 00:29:27.880
what any things you just said, but I want the recipe.
550
00:29:28.279 --> 00:29:30.480
I want you to make me that omelet, if that
551
00:29:30.519 --> 00:29:31.319
makes any sense.
552
00:29:31.519 --> 00:29:33.039
I want to make you something too.
553
00:29:33.160 --> 00:29:37.720
I want to make it some butter sausage, buttery.
554
00:29:38.319 --> 00:29:41.440
I would love butter sausage. But here's the thing, I
555
00:29:41.440 --> 00:29:44.279
don't know how much butter sausage I can eat. I'm
556
00:29:44.319 --> 00:29:47.480
a very I'm starting to watch my diet and that
557
00:29:47.559 --> 00:29:50.200
might be a little too much butter sausage.
558
00:29:51.720 --> 00:29:52.920
Well, I'm gonna have to leave.
559
00:29:52.960 --> 00:29:55.680
I might have my buddy Jimmy Fallons coming in.
560
00:29:56.680 --> 00:30:02.720
I've known Jimmy fle Yes, I remember Jimmy ay Man.
561
00:30:03.519 --> 00:30:05.440
I can't believe man, take you to see it. I
562
00:30:05.440 --> 00:30:09.240
can't believe Dave Chappelle. You know when I can't believe.
563
00:30:08.920 --> 00:30:13.359
That I haven't seen you since they reanimated your corpse
564
00:30:13.559 --> 00:30:16.279
when you fell out of thirty Rock at S and
565
00:30:16.519 --> 00:30:20.799
L forty. I said that man is gonna survive that fall,
566
00:30:21.039 --> 00:30:23.640
And Lauren Michael said, we got people that can work
567
00:30:23.640 --> 00:30:26.599
on them. We got people that work on them every day. Jimmy,
568
00:30:26.680 --> 00:30:28.720
how much of you was actually machine?
569
00:30:28.799 --> 00:30:33.559
Now I'm thirty percent human, so the rest is a machine.
570
00:30:34.160 --> 00:30:36.920
But but sometimes they've been working on me. And then
571
00:30:36.960 --> 00:30:39.839
my feet, my feet are my feet are robotic, but
572
00:30:39.880 --> 00:30:44.559
the skin is regular. And then my eyes are marbles,
573
00:30:45.079 --> 00:30:47.240
but they're not the regular marbles, and they kind of
574
00:30:47.240 --> 00:30:49.480
marbles that are kind of dull. And that's why I
575
00:30:49.559 --> 00:30:51.559
kind of have that off, you know, kind of and
576
00:30:51.720 --> 00:30:53.279
I'm in the moment, you know, in the moment, but
577
00:30:53.359 --> 00:30:55.319
I'm also I'm also full of shit, you know what
578
00:30:55.319 --> 00:30:55.599
I mean?
579
00:30:56.880 --> 00:30:58.440
Well, that was what I was gonna say, is I
580
00:30:58.480 --> 00:31:01.599
remember an old story that Charlie Murphy told me about
581
00:31:01.640 --> 00:31:05.200
one time you got struck by lightning when you was
582
00:31:05.240 --> 00:31:10.079
out partying in the Hamptons and it gave you superpowers
583
00:31:10.119 --> 00:31:15.839
for four days until you fought a mysterious alien predator,
584
00:31:16.559 --> 00:31:17.519
in which case you.
585
00:31:17.559 --> 00:31:19.680
Died and came back and I said, I've.
586
00:31:19.480 --> 00:31:22.200
Known Jimmy longer than that. I knew him before that,
587
00:31:23.319 --> 00:31:25.680
but I didn't know that the Now you have mental
588
00:31:25.720 --> 00:31:29.640
powers to appease the guests on the tonight show. I
589
00:31:29.640 --> 00:31:31.920
think that's a great thing. I think people need to
590
00:31:32.000 --> 00:31:32.920
applaud you. Now.
591
00:31:32.799 --> 00:31:35.799
Now, now you gotta you gotta, you gotta apply the engineers,
592
00:31:35.799 --> 00:31:37.440
the ones that put the put me together.
593
00:31:37.519 --> 00:31:40.039
You know, Okay, you know it's.
594
00:31:40.079 --> 00:31:41.839
But I want to talk to you real quick about
595
00:31:41.880 --> 00:31:46.440
black engineers. Now, you gotta understand something. Black engineers have
596
00:31:46.599 --> 00:31:50.200
never got the right shape. The man that invented the
597
00:31:50.279 --> 00:31:56.079
Android's name was Jamal Android. Now, the reason they didn't
598
00:31:56.160 --> 00:31:58.720
tell you that was because they never wanted to make
599
00:31:58.759 --> 00:32:02.839
a black robot. Because a black robot could break the
600
00:32:02.880 --> 00:32:05.960
white man's curse, and they never talk about it. It's
601
00:32:06.079 --> 00:32:07.319
very important you listen to me.
602
00:32:08.200 --> 00:32:11.279
All comes down to black robots. Huh.
603
00:32:11.640 --> 00:32:14.319
I've been saying this for years. If you can give
604
00:32:14.359 --> 00:32:17.279
me an army, Okay, if you give me an army
605
00:32:17.319 --> 00:32:22.680
of forty to fifty black cyborgs, I could reverse races.
606
00:32:22.960 --> 00:32:25.720
I could do it in a week. Jimmy, I could
607
00:32:25.720 --> 00:32:26.640
do it in two days.
608
00:32:26.680 --> 00:32:30.079
If you wanted to two days to be great. When
609
00:32:30.119 --> 00:32:30.720
can you start?
610
00:32:32.000 --> 00:32:34.000
Well, I didn't know you were serious. I didn't know
611
00:32:34.039 --> 00:32:37.480
you had access to black cyborgs. Now that's gonna change
612
00:32:37.519 --> 00:32:39.680
everything for me. You've got to understand I live in
613
00:32:39.759 --> 00:32:42.880
Yellow Springs, Ohio. But I could get to a military base,
614
00:32:43.240 --> 00:32:46.160
I would say Fort Bragg in about three to four days.
615
00:32:46.480 --> 00:32:48.119
So you give me four days we can get that
616
00:32:48.160 --> 00:32:50.119
Cyburg army up and fuck some bitches up.
617
00:32:50.440 --> 00:32:52.480
Well, I mean, you don't have to. You don't have to.
618
00:32:52.559 --> 00:32:55.440
You don't have to wait till you could come to today.
619
00:32:55.720 --> 00:32:56.720
You know you can stay with me.
620
00:32:57.079 --> 00:32:59.880
I can't do today. I can't do today. I got
621
00:32:59.880 --> 00:33:02.920
a croquet match at four pm and I just can't
622
00:33:03.039 --> 00:33:06.279
leave that. It's a very croquet is very important and
623
00:33:06.400 --> 00:33:07.440
Yellow Springs.
624
00:33:07.119 --> 00:33:10.640
Over id ccat do you say croquette?
625
00:33:10.640 --> 00:33:13.359
Well, that's a funny word, you know, curkquet.
626
00:33:13.079 --> 00:33:16.519
Come out man. It was another game invented by a
627
00:33:16.519 --> 00:33:19.440
black man that never got to play. Randall Croquete was
628
00:33:20.119 --> 00:33:25.079
a Tuski yam and and he invented croquet. But they
629
00:33:25.119 --> 00:33:27.400
don't want to tell you that. In the history of books.
630
00:33:27.680 --> 00:33:30.079
They don't want you to know that. They don't want
631
00:33:30.119 --> 00:33:32.559
you to know when you're at your barbecues that you're
632
00:33:32.559 --> 00:33:35.920
playing a black man's game. Very important.
633
00:33:36.119 --> 00:33:37.519
What about black croquette.
634
00:33:39.599 --> 00:33:43.880
It's called broquet and you don't play it with mallets.
635
00:33:44.079 --> 00:33:46.640
You actually play it with air. Jordan's on your feet
636
00:33:46.960 --> 00:33:50.680
and you kick the balls through. It's a different game
637
00:33:50.759 --> 00:33:51.400
that I'm not a.
638
00:33:51.400 --> 00:33:52.440
Fan Michael Jordan.
639
00:33:52.759 --> 00:33:54.640
Talk about Michael, you're talking about black guys. I mean
640
00:33:54.640 --> 00:33:57.720
this guy, he's a basketball player. You ever seen a
641
00:33:57.759 --> 00:33:58.240
whole life?
642
00:33:58.319 --> 00:34:02.440
Huh? Come man, I've I've never met a man that
643
00:34:02.640 --> 00:34:06.400
loved gambling more than Michael Jordan. Michael Jordan bet me
644
00:34:06.480 --> 00:34:09.320
that he would win his next bet. That's been inside
645
00:34:09.320 --> 00:34:11.679
a bet. I think about that daily.
646
00:34:15.920 --> 00:34:19.000
Oh God, it's hot in here? Are you? Did you
647
00:34:19.079 --> 00:34:21.119
put that thing? Is the temperature? Right?
648
00:34:22.719 --> 00:34:25.920
Hey? I haven't seen you in forever. How you been, Louis?
649
00:34:27.440 --> 00:34:29.800
Oh we both we're dead, but we haven't run into
650
00:34:29.800 --> 00:34:31.480
each other yet. That's so weird.
651
00:34:32.239 --> 00:34:34.199
I'm gonna tell you why. That's because I'm in Hell.
652
00:34:34.400 --> 00:34:37.960
It's a little hot where I'm What happened, Well.
653
00:34:37.760 --> 00:34:39.400
Let's just say there were a couple of women that
654
00:34:39.440 --> 00:34:41.199
I got rid of that I didn't know that was
655
00:34:41.199 --> 00:34:43.480
against the wall. I thought I was just getting rid
656
00:34:43.480 --> 00:34:44.280
of a headache.
657
00:34:44.679 --> 00:34:47.920
Oh god, that's it. I had no idea. So that's I.
658
00:34:47.880 --> 00:34:50.079
Got a murder streak, Louis a lot of people don't
659
00:34:50.079 --> 00:34:54.239
know that about me. Why a murder streak? You know
660
00:34:54.320 --> 00:34:55.320
a lot of people are.
661
00:34:55.239 --> 00:34:59.000
Violence, remember telling everybody.
662
00:35:00.239 --> 00:35:02.280
I look around everybody, and I go, you know what,
663
00:35:02.320 --> 00:35:04.440
if I went to school, I'd be shooting you too.
664
00:35:04.559 --> 00:35:07.760
I'd make you pay. Yeah, the girl doesn't want to
665
00:35:07.760 --> 00:35:09.440
take me to the dance. Well guess what, there's not
666
00:35:09.480 --> 00:35:11.559
going to be a dance because I'm gonna kill everybody.
667
00:35:12.800 --> 00:35:15.880
That's funny, That's funny, But you're serious, going.
668
00:35:16.519 --> 00:35:19.639
I'm dead serious. Hey, you know I saw those Columbine
669
00:35:19.719 --> 00:35:21.679
kids and I went, what took you so long? I
670
00:35:21.719 --> 00:35:23.679
should have been doing this back when I was a kid.
671
00:35:23.679 --> 00:35:27.440
You know my doctor, Vinniebumbots, I said, Doctor, I got
672
00:35:27.440 --> 00:35:29.599
some kids that they're teasing me. What should I do?
673
00:35:29.840 --> 00:35:32.360
He said, get a sway automatic? Then is the parents
674
00:35:32.400 --> 00:35:33.280
are going to miss them too.
675
00:35:33.920 --> 00:35:37.079
Okay, so you're okay, this is a different kind of Rodney.
676
00:35:37.079 --> 00:35:41.119
What would you classify this part of your life? I mean,
677
00:35:41.199 --> 00:35:43.079
your dad, But you're still killing.
678
00:35:42.960 --> 00:35:46.079
Pro school shooter. You know it's not a really popular take,
679
00:35:46.159 --> 00:35:47.840
but you got to go where you can get. And
680
00:35:47.840 --> 00:35:49.800
I'm telling you right now, I'm running out of takes.
681
00:35:50.159 --> 00:35:51.920
So right now I'm pro school shooter.
682
00:35:52.639 --> 00:35:54.679
Okay, Well that's I mean, I would keep that to
683
00:35:54.719 --> 00:35:57.599
yourself if you're still trying to get into Heaven, are you.
684
00:35:57.719 --> 00:35:59.519
I'm just trying to let these kids know. You don't
685
00:35:59.519 --> 00:36:01.360
got to tell you lye them down. If you got
686
00:36:01.360 --> 00:36:04.000
a bully in your school, shoot them at school.
687
00:36:05.880 --> 00:36:08.039
Okay. I feel like I don't know you anymore, and
688
00:36:08.119 --> 00:36:10.320
I'm not gonna worry about that because I still love you,
689
00:36:10.559 --> 00:36:12.719
and I love your comedy, and I listen.
690
00:36:12.719 --> 00:36:15.880
I would never listen. Me and you, Louis, we're good friends.
691
00:36:15.960 --> 00:36:18.679
We go back. In fact, if we were in school together,
692
00:36:18.719 --> 00:36:20.480
I'd probably go up to you and I'd say, hey,
693
00:36:21.000 --> 00:36:24.119
don't come to school tomorrow, and you would listen, and
694
00:36:24.159 --> 00:36:26.199
you look in my eyes and you would know I
695
00:36:26.239 --> 00:36:27.679
was about to exact revenge.
696
00:36:27.880 --> 00:36:30.840
You know, I probably wouldn't listen, because you know I'd
697
00:36:30.840 --> 00:36:32.199
love school and I would just.
698
00:36:32.559 --> 00:36:35.159
I know, yeah, I can't keep you away from learning.
699
00:36:35.480 --> 00:36:38.400
I always knew that about you, Louis. You love the books.
700
00:36:38.599 --> 00:36:40.360
Every time I saw you, I'd say, what, what what
701
00:36:40.400 --> 00:36:41.039
book you're reading?
702
00:36:41.320 --> 00:36:43.920
Well, it's a school launched it. I remember one time
703
00:36:43.920 --> 00:36:46.559
when I was a child, they had Nacho Day and
704
00:36:46.599 --> 00:36:50.320
they had all these little compartments with the had that
705
00:36:50.519 --> 00:36:53.679
cheese and the beef and all these things, and that
706
00:36:54.440 --> 00:36:57.800
just everybody couldn't handle themselves, so they just threw it.
707
00:36:57.920 --> 00:36:58.440
They threw it.
708
00:36:58.480 --> 00:36:59.679
Everywhere was a food fight.
709
00:37:00.920 --> 00:37:03.119
I would have killed when nachos at lunch, every time
710
00:37:03.119 --> 00:37:04.719
I got in the lunch line, when I'd hit till
711
00:37:04.719 --> 00:37:06.800
the lunch lady and she'd go, you've already had enough.
712
00:37:07.199 --> 00:37:08.840
I said, I have an eight today. She said, are
713
00:37:08.880 --> 00:37:11.800
you sure about that? I'd go hungry. That's why I'm
714
00:37:11.800 --> 00:37:14.159
so mad, Louis. They got me going hungry out.
715
00:37:14.360 --> 00:37:17.079
You got it, well, because you're you've killed all those people,
716
00:37:17.360 --> 00:37:18.039
I mean nobody.
717
00:37:18.280 --> 00:37:20.079
Well, I want to kill pal. You know, these are
718
00:37:20.079 --> 00:37:22.119
more fantasies than I put in my journals. But if
719
00:37:22.159 --> 00:37:24.880
I ever do it, they're gonna find my journals.
720
00:37:25.079 --> 00:37:27.800
Okay, so you haven't killed anyone.
721
00:37:28.119 --> 00:37:31.360
No, I'm I'm just pro school shooter. I haven't actually
722
00:37:31.400 --> 00:37:33.039
done it, and I don't got the balls to do it.
723
00:37:33.039 --> 00:37:34.719
You don't have to be a real cigo to actually
724
00:37:34.719 --> 00:37:35.119
go talk.
725
00:37:36.599 --> 00:37:38.719
You have to be so excited. God, you make me
726
00:37:38.760 --> 00:37:43.239
want to play the feud. God by serving you mind it.
727
00:37:43.320 --> 00:37:47.599
Donny Survey says Steve Harvey.
728
00:37:47.800 --> 00:37:51.360
Steve Harvey, God half the one you are. Well, I'm
729
00:37:51.360 --> 00:37:54.960
still jealous of Steve Harvey, even from heaven, because he
730
00:37:55.079 --> 00:37:57.159
really did something with that show. I mean, he was
731
00:37:57.199 --> 00:38:03.000
so calm. Nobody is that hmm. You know, I was sweat.
732
00:38:03.280 --> 00:38:04.800
You would have done way better if they had a
733
00:38:04.800 --> 00:38:07.360
bigger suit budget for you. You know, I look at
734
00:38:07.360 --> 00:38:10.280
Steve Harvey's suits, I say, what is this the American
735
00:38:10.280 --> 00:38:14.280
military budget? Look at this? Just putting us in a deficit. Jesus.
736
00:38:14.280 --> 00:38:16.920
That purple suit probably costs four million. That's enough. Four things.
737
00:38:16.960 --> 00:38:20.400
Well, you know, purple is a very expensive color, you know, because.
738
00:38:20.400 --> 00:38:22.360
I understand it's the color Royals.
739
00:38:22.239 --> 00:38:25.119
The color royalty, but it's the only color that comes
740
00:38:25.159 --> 00:38:29.920
from deer blood. And I saw one of those little
741
00:38:29.960 --> 00:38:32.480
reels on Instagram told me all about it.
742
00:38:32.679 --> 00:38:36.000
Yeah, I'm telling you, I'm such a bad school shooter.
743
00:38:36.239 --> 00:38:37.960
I used to go hunting and I'd take a shot
744
00:38:37.960 --> 00:38:39.559
at the deer and they say, thank God, I go No,
745
00:38:39.599 --> 00:38:41.559
I don't go to school you as I don't even
746
00:38:41.559 --> 00:38:42.280
know what that means.
747
00:38:43.239 --> 00:38:46.840
You know what I think it means. They're special guy,
748
00:38:47.239 --> 00:38:51.840
and there's something special about you. Even though you're in Hell.
749
00:38:51.960 --> 00:38:53.760
Louis, you're trying to make me. You're trying to make me,
750
00:38:54.039 --> 00:38:55.880
You're trying to make me emotional, You're trying to make
751
00:38:55.880 --> 00:39:00.079
me ask for forgiveness. I'm very close to tell and
752
00:39:00.519 --> 00:39:02.440
I could be in heaven. If I was in heaven,
753
00:39:03.440 --> 00:39:05.599
they'd probably send us all back to Hell. You get
754
00:39:05.599 --> 00:39:06.199
what I'm saying.
755
00:39:06.320 --> 00:39:08.400
Yeah, And you know Hell doesn't. Hell isn't what it
756
00:39:08.519 --> 00:39:09.679
used to be from what they hear.
757
00:39:09.920 --> 00:39:14.599
You know, it's got priced out. There's a lot a
758
00:39:14.599 --> 00:39:16.840
lot more white steeple like it hot. They don't like
759
00:39:16.920 --> 00:39:19.639
the cold weather. So a lot of people like Hell
760
00:39:19.880 --> 00:39:22.360
because they get that they get the heat.
761
00:39:22.719 --> 00:39:25.760
Yeah, it's a dry heat too. I'm totally just satan
762
00:39:25.920 --> 00:39:28.519
this guy. He's not even a real guy. He's got hooves.
763
00:39:28.920 --> 00:39:31.000
Last time I saw hooves on somebody that was my
764
00:39:31.039 --> 00:39:33.440
ex wife. I still want with three thousand dollars.
765
00:39:34.760 --> 00:39:36.519
Well, I mean, they're they're not going to track you
766
00:39:36.559 --> 00:39:37.320
down where you are.
767
00:39:38.519 --> 00:39:40.960
I hold not. It's gonna take a Ouiji.
768
00:39:40.679 --> 00:39:44.400
Board oi gi board you know that song? Morrisey Owiji
769
00:39:44.480 --> 00:39:49.519
board o g bard o each board something something something.
770
00:39:50.079 --> 00:39:53.119
I can't fucking remember anything up here. I can't. I'm
771
00:39:53.159 --> 00:39:54.960
not gonna get into it because you're in hell and
772
00:39:55.000 --> 00:39:55.400
I'm here.
773
00:39:55.440 --> 00:39:58.400
But god, hey, no, I love to rub it in.
774
00:39:58.840 --> 00:40:02.920
It's it's it's not fun anymore. At first, it was
775
00:40:03.000 --> 00:40:05.079
like all the shrimp you want. You know, you get
776
00:40:05.119 --> 00:40:07.400
as much shrimp as you want. Well, you know, when
777
00:40:07.400 --> 00:40:12.440
you're in heaven, you know only so much is does
778
00:40:12.480 --> 00:40:15.679
it feel like kind of like a treat after the rest,
779
00:40:15.719 --> 00:40:18.199
feels like your stomach's fall to fall.
780
00:40:18.599 --> 00:40:20.360
That's the problem. That's the problem with all you can
781
00:40:20.440 --> 00:40:23.079
eat buffets. You're having too mutch. You should only get
782
00:40:23.159 --> 00:40:25.760
enough of your fill and then put it down. Trust me,
783
00:40:26.039 --> 00:40:27.519
your butt doesn't need it. I know.
784
00:40:28.000 --> 00:40:29.280
That's what I keep telling myself.
785
00:40:29.960 --> 00:40:33.320
I think you keep telling myself that it's not in
786
00:40:33.400 --> 00:40:33.599
your air?
787
00:40:33.880 --> 00:40:37.760
Good you ever do that? You read I'm Louis Anderson.
788
00:40:37.840 --> 00:40:40.239
People don't talk about Louis Anderson, but they got to
789
00:40:40.280 --> 00:40:43.440
talk about Louis Anderson. I'm making I'm making some stickers
790
00:40:43.480 --> 00:40:44.760
to people that pass out.
791
00:40:45.320 --> 00:40:47.840
Keep my memory going for Louis Life with Louis was
792
00:40:47.840 --> 00:40:50.960
one of the best cartoons I've ever seen, and cartoons
793
00:40:51.000 --> 00:40:52.119
for kids, but I liked it.
794
00:40:52.199 --> 00:40:54.639
I'm gonna do Fickster for kids. Do and don't forget that?
795
00:40:56.119 --> 00:41:01.280
All right, let's go ahead and uh, okay, how about so,
796
00:41:01.679 --> 00:41:04.639
I don't want to keep you much longer. I know
797
00:41:04.719 --> 00:41:06.960
you've got a very busy schedule, but.
798
00:41:09.440 --> 00:41:16.079
I have a very big schedule schedule m de fall.
799
00:41:16.559 --> 00:41:23.079
I argue you are very scared by sometimes I see
800
00:41:23.159 --> 00:41:23.760
the humor.
801
00:41:27.559 --> 00:41:31.360
Well, listen, I'm a huge fan. I love wrestling. I
802
00:41:31.400 --> 00:41:34.440
love it. I love w WF wrestling, and I know
803
00:41:34.519 --> 00:41:37.719
that you were on there for a long time. What
804
00:41:37.800 --> 00:41:41.719
do you what are your tribute? You're dead now, aren't you?
805
00:41:41.719 --> 00:41:43.199
You're not alive? Is that right?
806
00:41:43.840 --> 00:41:49.119
I'm all he we go around soon.
807
00:41:50.280 --> 00:41:55.320
Okay, I didn't get a I didn't hear what you said.
808
00:41:55.440 --> 00:41:57.320
What did you What did you say?
809
00:41:57.880 --> 00:41:58.719
I say.
810
00:42:01.199 --> 00:42:08.639
With Okay, you're the only guy that could eat Louis Anderson?
811
00:42:09.119 --> 00:42:11.239
Isn't that right?
812
00:42:11.280 --> 00:42:15.519
Probably good? But while I wound through, I think it
813
00:42:15.679 --> 00:42:16.760
is Fay.
814
00:42:17.920 --> 00:42:20.920
What it is about you that makes you special, and
815
00:42:20.960 --> 00:42:25.320
that makes acting acting, and that makes wrestling. Wrestling is
816
00:42:25.400 --> 00:42:28.760
that you are bigger than life, not just in size,
817
00:42:28.800 --> 00:42:34.320
but in virtue, in memory and cunning. What did it?
818
00:42:35.000 --> 00:42:37.440
What did it feel like to get bigger and bigger
819
00:42:37.519 --> 00:42:39.960
and not really know what you're gonna do with yourself?
820
00:42:41.639 --> 00:42:46.239
It fell like I couldn't starved given beer. So I
821
00:42:46.280 --> 00:42:51.119
said to my doctor something is wrong, and he said, no,
822
00:42:51.639 --> 00:42:58.960
you are child. Through that, I say, I like you
823
00:43:00.159 --> 00:43:05.440
for hours a gorn in a movie. Will you are
824
00:43:05.599 --> 00:43:06.480
very fine?
825
00:43:07.519 --> 00:43:10.480
Well, unfortunately, the tough part about a movie is you've
826
00:43:10.519 --> 00:43:13.239
got to be able to understand what the person is saying,
827
00:43:13.400 --> 00:43:15.400
and with you, you can't relate.
828
00:43:15.480 --> 00:43:20.880
I understand everything you are saying. Are you saying you
829
00:43:20.960 --> 00:43:22.239
can't understand me?
830
00:43:23.599 --> 00:43:26.679
You know the song by the Police that says, don't stand,
831
00:43:27.159 --> 00:43:29.960
don't stand, don't stand so close to me?
832
00:43:31.320 --> 00:43:33.320
Ourse I love that album.
833
00:43:33.719 --> 00:43:36.360
Well, that song kind of reminds me of you, because
834
00:43:36.800 --> 00:43:40.239
you're a guy. You're out there doing your thing. If
835
00:43:40.280 --> 00:43:44.840
you want a Coca Cola, it's like twelve Coca colas, so.
836
00:43:45.119 --> 00:43:49.719
It's very time, my hounds. It is like I'm holding
837
00:43:50.400 --> 00:43:57.760
a super colb oh our, a super cold of Coca Go.
838
00:43:59.039 --> 00:44:05.440
Because I'm so big, you all so small? Oh God?
839
00:44:07.920 --> 00:44:10.119
Well, I hate to tell you this, but sippy cups
840
00:44:10.119 --> 00:44:13.880
have come a long way in the last twenty years
841
00:44:13.960 --> 00:44:17.480
after you've died. Some of them are quite big, big
842
00:44:17.519 --> 00:44:19.199
big sippy cups.
843
00:44:19.760 --> 00:44:24.360
Oh you're saying, Achu, how a super cup full jolly?
844
00:44:24.719 --> 00:44:27.159
If you had literally the size.
845
00:44:26.880 --> 00:44:30.360
Of it now as a punch bowl. That is not
846
00:44:30.519 --> 00:44:36.719
a super coup. That is a big beef. William de
847
00:44:36.880 --> 00:44:38.760
fall I like you are.
848
00:44:38.800 --> 00:44:41.119
You find you don't have to keep saying that you
849
00:44:41.320 --> 00:44:44.519
like me. I understand. I'll just assume that you like
850
00:44:44.639 --> 00:44:46.440
me from now on. Is that okay?
851
00:44:47.719 --> 00:44:52.039
Ah? Gool? Because pureball, they're all a friend of me,
852
00:44:52.559 --> 00:44:56.239
and I have to tell them. I argue. I will
853
00:44:56.320 --> 00:45:08.639
know across you because I argue, Ah, you're.
854
00:45:04.880 --> 00:45:08.800
Really something else. There's just an energy about you that
855
00:45:09.000 --> 00:45:13.559
you can't put your finger on. There's versatility when you're
856
00:45:13.639 --> 00:45:17.760
not looking for versatility. What makes you who you are?
857
00:45:17.960 --> 00:45:20.599
I mean, like, what gives it?
858
00:45:20.719 --> 00:45:20.880
Does?
859
00:45:21.000 --> 00:45:21.039
No?
860
00:45:21.320 --> 00:45:25.480
Mama? Who are? I have a question for your wi
861
00:45:25.840 --> 00:45:32.280
before Why does it lie to fry spiral man? Ah?
862
00:45:33.840 --> 00:45:38.599
Well that's a good question. Uh. It's not easy. It's hard.
863
00:45:39.239 --> 00:45:41.800
Some of the hours are very hard, some of the
864
00:45:41.920 --> 00:45:44.800
lines are very technical, and I'm very good at lines
865
00:45:45.000 --> 00:45:48.599
after all these years. But Spider Man's still the fastest
866
00:45:48.679 --> 00:45:51.679
thing out there, really, I mean other than things that
867
00:45:51.800 --> 00:45:55.079
can transport themselves. But we can play semantics all day
868
00:45:55.119 --> 00:45:55.960
long anyway.
869
00:45:56.480 --> 00:46:02.639
Yes, yes, did you ever know the Spider Man Ross
870
00:46:02.719 --> 00:46:06.639
Peter Parker? I did not know there, and then I
871
00:46:06.840 --> 00:46:11.400
read the comic books and I love he is a.
872
00:46:14.199 --> 00:46:18.000
Listen, It's a lot like wrestling. It's not real. I'm
873
00:46:18.119 --> 00:46:21.039
just playing a character called the Green Goblin. I'm not
874
00:46:21.199 --> 00:46:25.159
really a green Goblin, and so Spider Man's not really
875
00:46:25.480 --> 00:46:28.000
who you think he is either. He's actually a human being.
876
00:46:29.719 --> 00:46:34.639
I know there a human being there was spider a. Nah,
877
00:46:35.000 --> 00:46:39.679
he has super strength. You go with me a giant? Oh,
878
00:46:39.960 --> 00:46:45.639
he could find you at Goblin. I like that. Spider
879
00:46:45.760 --> 00:46:47.400
Man is a grudle plan.
880
00:46:47.880 --> 00:46:54.360
Yes, listen, Andre, I know you're a busy guy. We've
881
00:46:54.480 --> 00:46:58.119
talked about this before, but there's something about you that
882
00:46:58.280 --> 00:47:02.519
seems off a bit. Do you want substances or maybe alcohol?
883
00:47:02.679 --> 00:47:03.000
Right now?
884
00:47:04.320 --> 00:47:07.440
I drink wine, but that is because I am frown.
885
00:47:08.480 --> 00:47:12.599
I love wine. I drink twenty seven bottles a day.
886
00:47:13.320 --> 00:47:17.639
All there is no drunk. I was having wine.
887
00:47:18.679 --> 00:47:21.639
Yes, I suppose so but you know there's a limit.
888
00:47:21.719 --> 00:47:23.320
Everybody's got their own limits.
889
00:47:23.480 --> 00:47:27.800
So when you will before, there is no limit, especially
890
00:47:28.000 --> 00:47:32.440
for me a drive, I can drink whatever I want
891
00:47:32.800 --> 00:47:34.920
and the galleries go nowhere.
892
00:47:37.159 --> 00:47:41.760
That's something else, really great stuff. I really appreciate it, and.
893
00:47:43.360 --> 00:47:46.079
I like you, and I know I keep saying that
894
00:47:46.599 --> 00:47:49.679
because I want you the raw. I will never cross
895
00:47:49.760 --> 00:47:53.360
your head, even if I wanted to drool.
896
00:47:54.639 --> 00:47:56.559
I never thought you were going to cross my red.
897
00:47:57.159 --> 00:48:02.079
But you know I cross your hand. Herd. You're heard.
898
00:48:02.599 --> 00:48:07.079
I dig you, squawsh you squash. You like our bond.
899
00:48:07.559 --> 00:48:09.880
I don't know what it has. I don't know what
900
00:48:10.000 --> 00:48:11.519
you're saying. It makes no sense.
901
00:48:12.840 --> 00:48:16.840
You're all marking me mad. Now, I will call for you.
902
00:48:21.039 --> 00:48:25.280
I will team up with spoddle man. I will be
903
00:48:26.559 --> 00:48:33.280
and our spoiler will under fall irm me.
904
00:48:33.519 --> 00:48:37.719
Now, okay, Well, good luck finding me and good luck
905
00:48:37.760 --> 00:48:39.280
getting there. I mean, what are you going to take
906
00:48:39.320 --> 00:48:41.559
an airplane? You're not going to fit on an airplane.
907
00:48:41.719 --> 00:48:42.679
You're not gonna fit.
908
00:48:44.079 --> 00:48:44.239
Car.
909
00:48:45.039 --> 00:48:46.880
The only way someone's going to get you over here
910
00:48:46.920 --> 00:48:50.079
is if they airlift you with a set of I
911
00:48:50.159 --> 00:48:51.840
don't know, three or four helicopters.
912
00:48:52.960 --> 00:48:56.639
I will dumble drop on you and I will cross
913
00:48:56.760 --> 00:48:59.119
your herd lock her barg.
914
00:49:01.400 --> 00:49:04.360
Okay, well i'll see it. I see it tomorrow morning.
915
00:49:04.440 --> 00:49:05.400
Maybe we'll get some lunch.
916
00:49:06.679 --> 00:49:09.639
Oh n, I would like to have eggs with your
917
00:49:09.679 --> 00:49:12.320
William before you are Okay.
918
00:49:12.559 --> 00:49:18.519
Thank you too, Okay, all right, we did it.
919
00:49:20.239 --> 00:49:23.320
Great. Sorry about that. At the beginning, some of those voices,
920
00:49:23.360 --> 00:49:25.280
the Steve O thing, I thought I had longer, and
921
00:49:25.360 --> 00:49:27.039
then as I got into it, you know it, I
922
00:49:27.159 --> 00:49:29.400
was like, damn, I just like doing a couple of sentences.
923
00:49:29.480 --> 00:49:32.039
I kind of lose faith. Same with the cat. But
924
00:49:32.159 --> 00:49:35.519
everything else was so fun. That fucking god, damn it,
925
00:49:35.559 --> 00:49:39.159
you're great. That Jimmy Fallon is so I can't believe it.
926
00:49:39.559 --> 00:49:41.440
Damn ye, unbelievable, so great.
927
00:49:42.000 --> 00:49:45.519
It's so fucking funny. I was losing it. God, damn,
928
00:49:45.599 --> 00:49:47.920
you're talented. Thank you. That was really fun.
929
00:49:48.159 --> 00:49:49.880
Oh yeah, that was so great. I'm so glad you
930
00:49:49.920 --> 00:49:52.199
did the show. I mean, I've been It's just so
931
00:49:52.360 --> 00:49:54.639
fun to have somebody so good like you because it
932
00:49:54.880 --> 00:49:58.199
just makes me, uh, just try to get where you're at.
933
00:49:59.000 --> 00:50:01.199
You know now, way man, I was watching your consistency
934
00:50:01.320 --> 00:50:04.400
that Dustin Hoffman was fucking pitch perfect. It's just pitch perfect.
935
00:50:04.400 --> 00:50:05.679
Don't talked me like that.
936
00:50:06.840 --> 00:50:09.360
Yeah, that's the part that I'm like, fuck, that was good.
937
00:50:09.599 --> 00:50:12.039
Yea, But yours are great. You have a million great
938
00:50:12.119 --> 00:50:15.480
distinctive ones, and I love your material. That's the one
939
00:50:15.519 --> 00:50:18.360
thing I noticed about you that's so good is I've
940
00:50:18.400 --> 00:50:21.440
always had I've always felt like my the hardest part
941
00:50:21.480 --> 00:50:24.360
of stand up was to put these impressions in the
942
00:50:24.480 --> 00:50:25.840
right situation and.
943
00:50:26.280 --> 00:50:32.440
Yeah, yeah, it's really really fucking weird to do. Yeah,
944
00:50:32.599 --> 00:50:35.679
that's my favorite thing is like watching voices do things
945
00:50:35.719 --> 00:50:37.519
that you go, oh, he would never do. There's a
946
00:50:37.559 --> 00:50:40.719
guy that does a perfect Shilah Buff on Instagram and
947
00:50:40.840 --> 00:50:43.719
he just does like Shyla Buff working at home depot
948
00:50:43.800 --> 00:50:46.760
and it's so funny. Wow, I just love shit, Like yeah.
949
00:50:47.079 --> 00:50:50.519
But the other thing that I find to be an
950
00:50:50.599 --> 00:50:55.920
issue as in the last twenty years is nobody knows
951
00:50:56.000 --> 00:51:00.199
the same stuff, like, yeah, it's not all universe aw
952
00:51:00.280 --> 00:51:03.519
breaking bad even though you got a good one, you
953
00:51:03.639 --> 00:51:06.000
know that kind of thing. And so I'm kind of
954
00:51:06.079 --> 00:51:08.400
going more into like characters, which I know you do
955
00:51:08.440 --> 00:51:08.679
a lot of.
956
00:51:08.880 --> 00:51:11.480
Yeah, that's fun at hell, that's fun at hell, that's cool.
957
00:51:11.519 --> 00:51:14.320
I like that ship. Yeah, you're super talented with fess man,
958
00:51:14.360 --> 00:51:16.519
it's fucking crazy. Thanks for having me.
959
00:51:16.639 --> 00:51:20.519
Yeah, thanks for doing it. Yeah awesome, and just.
960
00:51:20.559 --> 00:51:22.519
Let me clip it or clip it and then send
961
00:51:22.559 --> 00:51:24.800
it to me, you know, fucking you know repost.
962
00:51:24.519 --> 00:51:27.320
All right, sounds good, All right, I'll talk to you. Thanks,
963
00:51:27.360 --> 00:51:29.000
and you know this is part of it too, write
964
00:51:29.239 --> 00:51:30.079
what we've been talking.
965
00:51:31.079 --> 00:51:37.639
Oh, hell yeah, it's awesome. Yeah, absolutely, Oh, I guess
966
00:51:37.719 --> 00:51:41.119
can you cut the thing about the would you mind
967
00:51:41.159 --> 00:51:44.039
cutting the part out about the when I out fucking
968
00:51:45.039 --> 00:51:49.239
and then going thanks dude, I appreciate it. All right,
969
00:51:49.320 --> 00:51:49.840
Bye Jeff