S6 EP40: Peter Andre

WEBVTT
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Hello, I'm Rob Beckett.
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And I'm Josh Willicombe.
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Welcome to Parents in Hell, the show in which Josh
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and I discuss what it's really like to be a parent,
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which I would say can be a little tricky.
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So, to make ourselves, and hopefully you, feel better about
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the trials and tribulations of modern day parenting, each week
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we'll be chatting to a famous parent about.
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How they're coping.
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Or hopefully how they're not coping.
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And we'll also be hearing from you, the listener, with
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your tips, advice, and of course, tales of parenting woe.
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Because let's be honest, there are plenty of times when
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none of us know what we're doing. Hello, you're listening
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to Parents in Hell with.
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George, say Rob.
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Rob.
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Beckham.
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And Josh.
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Josh.
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Beckham.
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Weddickham.
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Good boy.
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Love you.
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Love you. Love you.
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You know what?
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I think that might be the best he's ever had.
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Yeah, I really enjoyed that.
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He mugged his mum off, then also said, I love you,
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and did a good laugh. It's like Sid James. In
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my head, he's smoking a cigar in that bath. Hi,
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Rob and Josh. This is my two-year-old son, George. He
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copies absolutely everything. Thank you for everything. I've never missed
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an episode, and you're both awesome, and I definitely would.
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Oh.
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Louise from Seven Oaks.
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Oh, your neck of the woods as well, Rob.
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It is.
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And I definitely would. Is she saying that she fancies us?
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She can't be.
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It does seem very forward, doesn't it?
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It can't be.
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Hi, Rob and Josh. This is my two-year-old.
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This is my two-year-old son, George. Oh, so we're both married.
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He copies absolutely everything. He copies absolutely everything. Thank you
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for everything.
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I don't want him to copy that, please, Louise.
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Thank you for everything. I've never missed an episode, and
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you're both awesome, and I definitely would.
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I can't, Peter. Well, thank you very much, Louise.
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I'll send you an email.
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How are you, Rob?
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I'm good.
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Peter Andre is not someone I thought I'd be interviewing
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in my career.
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Why not?
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You're not a dreamer.
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Do you know what? I didn't bring this up. The
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only encounter I had before with Peter Andre was when
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me and Alex Brooker did the million pound drop. I
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was very new in TV. It was just after the
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first Paralympics.
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I'd love to watch that back.
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Oh, my God.
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I thought you'd be getting so stressed.
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Brooker and me, and then halfway through, they did what
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felt exciting at the time. They did a Zoom. It
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wasn't Zoom then. It was like a satellite link-up with
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Peter Andre.
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Yeah.
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To announce that you could win the chance to play
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with Peter Andre next week. Right. And they build up
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this satellite link-up with Peter Andre the whole way through.
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And then when they bring him up at the bottom
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of his screen, it just says Peter Andre in Sussex.
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And you're like, Fuck, they've built up this satellite link-up.
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He's an hour away in Sussex. Surely he could have come.
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I thought he was going to be in Australia. Davina
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and Peter can barely get a conversation going.
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And this is pre-Zoom.
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Pre-Zoom.
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But he's on a satellite. He used to be really exotic,
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a satellite link-up. Now it's just like logging in.
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Oh, he used to be so exciting. Who gives a fuck? Yeah. Yeah,
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have you met him before?
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Andre? Yeah, I have a couple of times. So I
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float around in that sort of bit of celeb-y world,
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don't I, when I used to do The Jungle? You know,
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that sort of I've been upping on. Did he win
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The Jungle? No, I don't think he did that year.
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I don't know if Jordan won it, but that was
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the year he wrote the hit song Insania that he
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wrote in The Jungle. And that's where he met Katie
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Price Jordan, isn't it?
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Yeah.
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But, yeah, no, I don't think he won The Jungle.
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Good guy, though.
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Do you remember when Keris from Catatonia got together with
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Janny from EastEnders in The Jungle?
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No.
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I don't.
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Have I misremembered that? Because I'm not a regular watcher
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of it. I feel like I would have known that. Yeah,
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it feels like you should know that.
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Yeah, well, I've got a two to three year period
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in my life where....
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All I did was gig and I didn't have a telly.
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I've got that for so many... Like, for football, I'm
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really bad for those first few years when I was
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a stand-up comedian.
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Yes.
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And music. I just don't know what was going on.
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No, no, same. Any sort of pop culture stuff, I've
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got absolutely nothing in the... Yeah, but I think you're right.
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Yeah.
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Keris and... Yeah, I've completely blocked that out, but you're right.
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You're correct on that. But yeah, I've got a pop
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culture black hole where all I was doing was Like
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I had no money and no telly and I'll just
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be out at gigs all the time and then getting
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drunk after quite tragically. But yeah, I think you're correct.
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I've got in, in reverse, I've got a incredibly detailed
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knowledge of minor news stories from around 2013 to 2017,
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because I was doing panel shows almost every week about
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the news.
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Oh, Eric Pickles is burning into my head.
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Yeah, fucking hell, yeah.
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Is he still going, Eric Pickles? But Eric Pickles, basically,
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this was when we first started, what, the week? And
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everyone would just do like a.
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Weight joke about Eric Pickles. Yeah, it's mad.
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And it was like, what a mad thing to do,
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because he's just a bit of a, he's a big fella.
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And I'd be like, oh, he's still doing Eric Pickles jokes.
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Every week, Eric Pickles jokes.
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Horse lasagna. Horse meat and Eric Pickles. And Wayne Rooney
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being compared to Shrek happened a lot on what the week.
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Oh my word, yeah. What a life we lead.
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Before we bring you Peter Andre, let's have a quick
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bit of correspondence. We've not done much, have we?
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No.
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There's a lot of people talking about my Scrabble skills.
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Oh yeah, yeah.
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Regarding a recent episode where Rob talks about being really
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good at Scrabble and always beating Lou, who is a
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teacher with a master's degree, I'll let you know. My
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sister is dyslexic and is great at Scrabble with things
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because her brain is looking at her letters in a
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far less linear way than those of us without dyslexic tendencies. Thanks, Catherine.
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That's why.
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That is interesting.
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I knew the old dyslyzia would come in handy at
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some point.
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There you go.
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I told you about that when I read it for
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the first time, dyslexia.
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And you called it dyslysia.
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Yeah.
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It was an advert in Sainsbury's. Remember before the internet,
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people were bored and people could put little adverts of
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what they did. And it was a dyslexia tutor. And
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I was like, dyslysia tutor? What the fuck's dyslysia? The
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other thing as well, this was an observation that never worked. Oh,
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I look forward to that. Dolphin friendly tuna.
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Yeah.
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Right.
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And I felt like, You can't just be bothered about
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dolphins if you're eating fish. How about tuna-friendly tuna? He's like,
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you're either eating fish or you're not. Like, well, just
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because they smile a bit, you can't eat a fucking dolphin.
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Yeah, I think that is funny. I think that is funny.
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Yeah, it never really works. Bring it back. Don't you worry. Oh,
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lies told at school by kids. Hi, Rob and Josh.
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When I was at school, a boy told me that
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Tamagotchis were the uploaded souls of dead Japanese people.
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Oh, my God.
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We were 17 at the time. Safe to say that
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that terrified me for years. Do you know what? At 17,
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that would. Because if someone tells you that when they're
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like six, they're a bit like, what are they talking about?
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But at 17, you're like, this geezer's an incel.
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Yeah.
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He's into some stuff, he is. We've got so many
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lies told at school by kids. Here's another one from Mandy. Okay.
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Who says, keep it sexy, guys. There was a boy
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in my year at primary school who told everyone his
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dad was Knight Rider.
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Oh, yeah. We had a kid who claimed his dad
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had a James Bond watch. Fuck off.
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He was so convinced of this, he kept it going
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for a while until we saw him being picked up
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from school by his dad, who was actually a BSM
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driving instructor with no kit car in sight. but rather
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a very uncool dual-pedal-controlled Nissan Micra. Oh, so what he's
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done is he's gone like, oh, you're like Knight Rider
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because he's got special pedals, but it's just a Nissan
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Micra teaching people to drive.
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There was one kid at my school, and the rumour
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was that his dad ran Panasonic, like the whole company.
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The proof was that if you went into Panasonic and exited,
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the kid's dad would be in there.
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Right.
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He'd be like, The head of Panasonic isn't working in
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the local Panasonic in Exeter.
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No, he's in Penzance.
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He knows what a flagship store is, mate. Right, let's
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get Peter Andre when we've babbled on for ages. Sorry,
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here's Peter Andre.
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Also, great back catalogue of mega hits. Mysterious Girl will
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be a mega hit forever.
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I apologize about that. Yeah, it's funny because sometimes when
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we go places overseas and you walk into a nightclub,
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I don't really go to clubs anymore. But when you
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walk into somewhere, a bar or whatever, and they play
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the song and people in other countries, they have no
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idea who sung it. They just know the song. And
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I'll be sitting there moving along with it. dying inside.
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They're sitting next to me and they have no idea
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and it's quite funny.
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We will get onto the parenting. That video for Mysterious Girl,
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when did you get that ripped? How did that work?
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This is a true story, right? I was picked on
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a lot as a kid because Where I moved to
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in Australia, it wasn't very multicultural. So we moved to
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this little place called the Gold Coast near Brisbane. And
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at the time, it was all beautiful, blonde-haired, blue-eyed Aussies.
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And here we were, this Greek family with curly hair
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and big noses and English accents, and they weren't too
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keen on us. And so we got picked on a lot.
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And so what I used to do was these kids
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at school asked me what sport I liked. And I said, football,
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because I'd just come from England. So I was born
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in England, moved there when I was six. And I said,
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I support football. And they went, What, American football? And
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I said, no, football. You know, and I was doing this.
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And they went, what, soccer? And I went, yeah. And
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they started laughing and this kid just cracked me one
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in the face.
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Oh, no.
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He goes, listen here, we don't do girls' sport here
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and that's a girls' sport. And I thought, that's a
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really odd thing. Incidentally, soccer back then was huge with
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the Socceroos, which were the gold teams. Yeah, yeah. Now,
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soccer's massive in Australia. But it's funny because then when
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the Lionesses were smashing it here, I was like, yeah,
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we remember the Socceroos from back in the day who
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were heroes. But anyway, because I couldn't belong to their
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sports because they were all playing cricket and rugby.
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They're all massive, especially Gold Coast. It's quite alpha male.
250
00:10:16.620 --> 00:10:17.019
I know.
251
00:10:17.100 --> 00:10:19.379
You fucking soft cock. They call you soft cock, so
252
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I'm a fucking soft cock.
253
00:10:20.559 --> 00:10:21.639
Yeah, absolutely. Absolutely.
254
00:10:21.740 --> 00:10:24.100
What I did, I'm a celebrity. All the camera guys
255
00:10:24.120 --> 00:10:25.820
are from... And they were like, right, mate, I've got
256
00:10:25.840 --> 00:10:28.379
an idea. I'm going to fucking kidnap Joe Swash, take
257
00:10:28.399 --> 00:10:30.820
him out into the fucking bush and fucking tape him up.
258
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And I went, mate, he's the presenter on the show.
259
00:10:32.590 --> 00:10:34.929
You're the cameraman. You can't nick the presenter. I went, oh,
260
00:10:34.970 --> 00:10:37.350
fuck off, you soft cock. He's just having a fucking laugh.
261
00:10:37.690 --> 00:10:39.730
Sometimes they can't be bothered to say the whole thing,
262
00:10:39.750 --> 00:10:40.909
so they'll just call you a cock.
263
00:10:40.990 --> 00:10:43.669
Yeah, and they've got massive hands. All Australian blokes got
264
00:10:43.730 --> 00:10:46.710
massive strong hands because all their sports are hands. So
265
00:10:46.730 --> 00:10:48.149
they were being a bit mean to you and then
266
00:10:48.210 --> 00:10:49.750
you got in shape, did you? Yeah.
267
00:10:49.990 --> 00:10:52.580
So I thought, well... I can't really hang out with
268
00:10:52.620 --> 00:10:54.620
them because the ones that don't like me are playing
269
00:10:54.659 --> 00:10:56.570
all the sports that I can't be part of. So
270
00:10:56.950 --> 00:10:58.370
I just used to go to the gym and sit there.
271
00:10:58.750 --> 00:11:00.470
My brothers wouldn't let me lift any weights because I
272
00:11:00.490 --> 00:11:02.649
was too skinny and too young. So I'd just sit
273
00:11:02.669 --> 00:11:04.549
there and I'd do abs for an hour and a half,
274
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weigh them lots to finish. And I would just sit,
275
00:11:07.669 --> 00:11:11.159
literally do sit-ups, push-ups, sit-ups, push-ups. Well, by the time
276
00:11:11.279 --> 00:11:14.899
I was 16, I'm like, Jeez, this is all right.
277
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That's how it happened.
278
00:11:16.840 --> 00:11:17.240
Really?
279
00:11:17.259 --> 00:11:20.220
Because it was also, it was in a time before abs.
280
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Do you know what I mean?
281
00:11:21.519 --> 00:11:23.519
It was like, what was it, 93 or whatever year
282
00:11:23.559 --> 00:11:25.360
it would have been. In Love Island now, lots of
283
00:11:25.379 --> 00:11:27.759
people look like that. No one had those abs in
284
00:11:27.830 --> 00:11:29.509
those days. You invented the ab.
285
00:11:29.730 --> 00:11:31.409
My dad thought it was plastic surgery.
286
00:11:31.490 --> 00:11:31.809
Did he?
287
00:11:31.909 --> 00:11:32.929
He thought that's not real.
288
00:11:33.190 --> 00:11:35.730
I've been asked to this day if I had chest implants.
289
00:11:36.029 --> 00:11:39.019
And I thought, you know what? I wish they existed, man,
290
00:11:39.039 --> 00:11:41.220
because I worked so hard for that. I'd have loved
291
00:11:41.259 --> 00:11:43.460
to have just gone and did easy jobs. The problem
292
00:11:43.679 --> 00:11:45.200
is you've got to run for your own back.
293
00:11:45.419 --> 00:11:45.950
Tell me about it.
294
00:11:45.980 --> 00:11:48.480
Because then years later, everyone else is looking ripped on
295
00:11:48.500 --> 00:11:51.659
these shows, and I'm like, yeah, no.
296
00:11:51.799 --> 00:11:53.360
We have to deal with that with Joel Domet. He's
297
00:11:53.399 --> 00:11:54.139
still ripped.
298
00:11:54.159 --> 00:11:54.879
He is ripped.
299
00:11:55.480 --> 00:11:57.899
But one day, he won't be. Let's talk to you
300
00:11:57.919 --> 00:12:00.970
about your kids, Peter. For people that don't know, what kids.
301
00:12:00.799 --> 00:12:01.250
Have you got?
302
00:12:01.370 --> 00:12:03.870
We are a bit like cockroaches. There's loads of us.
303
00:12:04.389 --> 00:12:08.090
It all started from my dad, who was... His mum
304
00:12:08.149 --> 00:12:13.169
and dad, well, his mum, obviously, same dad, was pregnant
305
00:12:13.169 --> 00:12:13.679
17 times.
306
00:12:13.960 --> 00:12:14.740
Whoa.
307
00:12:14.740 --> 00:12:19.139
17 times. And I think only 13 survived at the end. Oh,
308
00:12:19.159 --> 00:12:21.019
my word. 12 ended up surviving.
309
00:12:21.100 --> 00:12:21.279
Yeah.
310
00:12:21.299 --> 00:12:23.500
So dad's one of 12 eventually.
311
00:12:23.519 --> 00:12:24.419
Blimey.
312
00:12:24.879 --> 00:12:28.720
I'm one of six. So now anything under double digits,
313
00:12:28.759 --> 00:12:30.769
we're thinking we're not succeeding.
314
00:12:30.789 --> 00:12:33.090
How many kids you got and what are their ages?
315
00:12:33.210 --> 00:12:35.909
So we've got juniors who'll be 18 in June. Can
316
00:12:35.950 --> 00:12:38.580
you believe it? Princess is 15. Do you like how
317
00:12:38.620 --> 00:12:40.309
I'm taking ages to figure it out because I forgot
318
00:12:40.330 --> 00:12:44.570
their ages? Yeah. Amelia's nine and Theo's six. But obviously,
319
00:12:44.629 --> 00:12:47.289
I've changed five sets of nappies in the last 20 years.
320
00:12:47.370 --> 00:12:48.429
So I'm a dad pad.
321
00:12:48.570 --> 00:12:48.889
Yeah.
322
00:12:49.049 --> 00:12:49.909
Yeah. Yeah.
323
00:12:49.960 --> 00:12:52.720
And obviously, in previous relationships, there's been stepchildren and stuff
324
00:12:52.740 --> 00:12:55.279
like that. So for the last 20 years, kids have
325
00:12:55.299 --> 00:12:56.259
been ruling your life.
326
00:12:56.440 --> 00:12:59.159
I just want Theo to get to the point where
327
00:12:59.179 --> 00:13:04.299
he could just wipe his own bum. I'm like, come on, please.
328
00:13:04.340 --> 00:13:06.460
That's 20 years of ass wiping you've done nearly.
329
00:13:06.580 --> 00:13:08.740
I've been called an ass wipe, but to be doing
330
00:13:08.820 --> 00:13:10.919
it constantly, I understand why now.
331
00:13:11.539 --> 00:13:14.379
Must be difficult having the 18 and 15-year-old and a
332
00:13:14.440 --> 00:13:18.299
boy and a girl presenting way more different problems than
333
00:13:18.370 --> 00:13:22.129
a kid. You know, obviously, sometimes imagine having a teenage daughter,
334
00:13:22.210 --> 00:13:24.049
you'd much rather her still be four and you're having
335
00:13:24.070 --> 00:13:25.309
to wipe her bum and put her to bed at
336
00:13:25.350 --> 00:13:27.730
six rather than her going out, doing what she's doing.
337
00:13:27.750 --> 00:13:29.590
So how are you managing that? Having the little kids
338
00:13:29.669 --> 00:13:30.990
and then teenage problems?
339
00:13:31.230 --> 00:13:32.620
No, I'm going to be honest with you. I'd rather
340
00:13:32.629 --> 00:13:34.360
it be a teenager than me having to do all
341
00:13:34.399 --> 00:13:34.840
that again.
342
00:13:34.940 --> 00:13:36.139
Yeah, fair enough.
343
00:13:36.200 --> 00:13:39.620
It's the boyfriend thing and the girlfriend thing. So when
344
00:13:39.659 --> 00:13:43.659
Junior was... 15 and he started going out with a
345
00:13:43.679 --> 00:13:45.389
girl and he was asking, can I go see her?
346
00:13:45.399 --> 00:13:47.919
I was a bit like, I don't know. And all
347
00:13:47.980 --> 00:13:50.750
I remember Emily saying to me was, whatever rules you
348
00:13:50.789 --> 00:13:52.409
have for junior, you're going to have to have the
349
00:13:52.450 --> 00:13:56.250
same rules for princess. You can't do the old school mentality.
350
00:13:56.269 --> 00:13:58.289
Because I was old school. I grew up in a
351
00:13:58.350 --> 00:14:01.610
generation where our parents, they let the boys do everything.
352
00:14:01.669 --> 00:14:04.629
But the girls, and I feel bad because my sister...
353
00:14:04.750 --> 00:14:07.210
She went through so many years where she wasn't allowed
354
00:14:07.250 --> 00:14:10.019
to do things that us boys were allowed. Yeah. And
355
00:14:10.059 --> 00:14:12.039
it took me to have kids and for them to
356
00:14:12.120 --> 00:14:14.379
start growing up for me to go, yeah, I don't
357
00:14:14.419 --> 00:14:15.019
agree with that.
358
00:14:15.259 --> 00:14:15.539
Yeah.
359
00:14:15.759 --> 00:14:17.860
They have to be equal. So I used to joke
360
00:14:17.879 --> 00:14:19.720
that my daughter is going to be a nun, even
361
00:14:19.740 --> 00:14:21.980
though I secretly wanted that to happen, but it never was.
362
00:14:22.940 --> 00:14:26.610
I realized that actually. Whatever rules I set for Junior
363
00:14:26.629 --> 00:14:28.980
at 15, I had to set for her at 15.
364
00:14:28.970 --> 00:14:31.649
And now she's 15 and I'm going, oh my gosh.
365
00:14:31.870 --> 00:14:34.080
And I'm starting to get scared, but I think we're
366
00:14:34.120 --> 00:14:35.000
handling it okay.
367
00:14:35.179 --> 00:14:36.440
You never know if you're doing the right thing. You
368
00:14:36.480 --> 00:14:37.360
just hope for the best.
369
00:14:37.659 --> 00:14:38.759
You just hope for the best.
370
00:14:39.039 --> 00:14:41.039
And with the younger one, so what, they're six and nine,
371
00:14:41.080 --> 00:14:41.500
did you say?
372
00:14:41.889 --> 00:14:42.110
Yeah.
373
00:14:42.250 --> 00:14:44.809
I've heard that six is, that's a nice age, right?
374
00:14:44.870 --> 00:14:45.370
The best.
375
00:14:45.610 --> 00:14:47.570
So you're still bum wiping at six because my youngest
376
00:14:47.610 --> 00:14:50.009
is five and she still makes me wipe her bum
377
00:14:50.110 --> 00:14:51.809
on the toilet. And I'm like, this has got to stop.
378
00:14:51.850 --> 00:14:52.090
Yeah.
379
00:14:52.549 --> 00:14:54.610
I think five, six, I think they're too old for that.
380
00:14:54.629 --> 00:14:56.450
And I'm doing it as well. I'm not criticising you, Peter.
381
00:14:56.769 --> 00:14:59.259
I'm wiping arses as well at an age where you shouldn't.
382
00:14:59.399 --> 00:15:02.740
Exactly what I've said. And I'm like, come on, mate,
383
00:15:02.840 --> 00:15:05.100
just at least do the first three wipes.
384
00:15:07.200 --> 00:15:10.320
Meet me halfway yeah coming as a foreman of the
385
00:15:10.360 --> 00:15:11.559
building site where i.
386
00:15:11.519 --> 00:15:13.779
Could just do the final check over to go yeah
387
00:15:13.820 --> 00:15:16.639
you're fine yeah and that might include me not having
388
00:15:16.679 --> 00:15:20.379
to do anything because yep you're good yes exactly yeah
389
00:15:20.399 --> 00:15:23.289
show me the last piece yep we're good.
390
00:15:23.309 --> 00:15:26.110
Maybe that's the process maybe i'll suggest that yeah.
391
00:15:25.710 --> 00:15:27.850
Yeah but they won't meet me halfway and it's like
392
00:15:27.870 --> 00:15:30.909
they know all i hear is this if mom's home
393
00:15:30.970 --> 00:15:34.120
it's mom i'm done if dad's home dad i'm done
394
00:15:34.179 --> 00:15:35.980
i know exactly what's happening Right in the middle of
395
00:15:36.029 --> 00:15:38.419
my sandwich. Yeah. Right in the middle of a coffee.
396
00:15:38.759 --> 00:15:39.200
Yeah.
397
00:15:39.360 --> 00:15:41.159
And then I come back and I'm like, I don't
398
00:15:41.179 --> 00:15:41.960
want to eat it anymore.
399
00:15:43.639 --> 00:15:44.820
Were you good at the nappies?
400
00:15:45.379 --> 00:15:50.610
I was very hands-on because, again, thinking back to my
401
00:15:50.659 --> 00:15:54.909
parents' generation, my mum did all of that. Yeah. Really? Yes.
402
00:15:54.970 --> 00:15:57.269
It was very much like, I love you, my son,
403
00:15:57.909 --> 00:16:03.210
but you keep your ass wiping to yourself. I thought, nah,
404
00:16:03.529 --> 00:16:06.440
I think. Time's changed. Yeah, of course. I like being
405
00:16:06.480 --> 00:16:08.610
a hands-on dad. I just didn't think it was going
406
00:16:08.629 --> 00:16:09.429
to be that hands-on.
407
00:16:09.509 --> 00:16:11.649
I can't imagine you as a disciplinarian because you're such
408
00:16:11.690 --> 00:16:13.889
a nice bloke. I wouldn't say soft, that's the wrong word,
409
00:16:13.909 --> 00:16:16.360
but you're not like an alpha male despite the abs.
410
00:16:17.080 --> 00:16:20.259
You know, so I can't imagine you being too disciplinarian-y.
411
00:16:21.019 --> 00:16:24.350
It's really weird because, again, going back generations, you know,
412
00:16:24.379 --> 00:16:26.970
where we used to get good walloping at school from
413
00:16:26.990 --> 00:16:29.389
the headmasters, you know, with canes and all that.
414
00:16:29.649 --> 00:16:32.710
Really? Oh, yeah. How old are you? Are you like 93,
415
00:16:32.690 --> 00:16:33.470
but look unbelievable?
416
00:16:34.129 --> 00:16:36.610
I'll never forget this. I got the cane at six
417
00:16:36.669 --> 00:16:40.039
years old at school. It was the stick and it
418
00:16:40.059 --> 00:16:41.919
was right across there. It was the worst pain. I
419
00:16:41.960 --> 00:16:45.240
got it at high school in Australia. And also in England,
420
00:16:45.700 --> 00:16:47.720
when I was six, I got, they called it the
421
00:16:47.759 --> 00:16:50.830
plimsoll pudding. You remember plimsolls, right?
422
00:16:50.889 --> 00:16:52.070
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
423
00:16:52.110 --> 00:16:53.129
Like you always went down.
424
00:16:53.169 --> 00:16:55.889
No, no, but just not for dessert. Normally for PE.
425
00:16:55.950 --> 00:16:59.570
Not the headmaster, the vice headmaster, whatever, the one underneath him.
426
00:17:00.110 --> 00:17:02.529
He used to get the plimsoll and he used to
427
00:17:02.590 --> 00:17:04.809
smack him. We used to get a plimsoll pudding if
428
00:17:04.849 --> 00:17:07.730
we were misbehaving. Oh, my word. And that was one
429
00:17:07.809 --> 00:17:08.549
under the cane.
430
00:17:08.710 --> 00:17:10.450
So where would he hit you with the plimsoll?
431
00:17:11.190 --> 00:17:14.910
Oh, you'd get it cracked on the head, the bum, wherever. Yeah,
432
00:17:14.950 --> 00:17:15.970
you would get a plimsoll.
433
00:17:15.990 --> 00:17:16.789
A clump, yeah.
434
00:17:17.190 --> 00:17:19.839
And so we called it the plimsoll pudding. And when
435
00:17:19.940 --> 00:17:22.400
I had kids, I thought- Should I get some plimsolls?
436
00:17:22.519 --> 00:17:25.039
I thought, should I buy some plimsolls now? I thought,
437
00:17:25.819 --> 00:17:28.519
if I give the look that my dad used to
438
00:17:28.559 --> 00:17:31.660
give me, because dad used to give me a look, right? Yeah.
439
00:17:31.920 --> 00:17:34.319
And I thought, if I give them that look, is
440
00:17:34.339 --> 00:17:36.799
that going to stop them doing it? Or was it
441
00:17:37.039 --> 00:17:39.309
the smack that used to stop me doing it? Yeah.
442
00:17:39.589 --> 00:17:41.789
And I realized, my kids, because I've never raised my
443
00:17:41.829 --> 00:17:45.819
hands to them ever, I realized that that look And
444
00:17:45.920 --> 00:17:49.579
then feeling like they disappoint you sometimes is a worse feeling. Yeah.
445
00:17:49.940 --> 00:17:52.980
Because I remember if I disappointed Dad, the feeling I
446
00:17:53.019 --> 00:17:56.160
would have of disappointing him, even now when I'm 50
447
00:17:56.160 --> 00:17:59.240
and I still feel like I don't want to disappoint him.
448
00:17:59.920 --> 00:18:02.160
So I found a way to navigate around it. So
449
00:18:02.240 --> 00:18:04.670
I disciplined them without ever having to raise my hand
450
00:18:04.710 --> 00:18:04.990
to them.
451
00:18:05.369 --> 00:18:06.089
Can we see the look?
452
00:18:06.650 --> 00:18:07.069
The look?
453
00:18:07.089 --> 00:18:10.309
Yes. Oh, do you know what it is? It's because
454
00:18:10.329 --> 00:18:13.430
you're so smiley and likeable at night. As soon as
455
00:18:13.450 --> 00:18:15.619
you stop smiling, it does get quite stressful.
456
00:18:15.700 --> 00:18:17.220
It's got to be a bit of a De Niro.
457
00:18:17.319 --> 00:18:19.019
Yeah, I started panicking.
458
00:18:19.140 --> 00:18:21.480
I instantly felt like the interview was going badly, Rob.
459
00:18:21.519 --> 00:18:23.279
It instantly felt like we overstepped the mark.
460
00:18:23.299 --> 00:18:25.420
Then he smiled again and I felt so relieved. Thank
461
00:18:25.440 --> 00:18:26.000
God for that.
462
00:18:26.119 --> 00:18:28.220
Thank God for that. It was like, yeah, all right,
463
00:18:28.240 --> 00:18:30.589
we'll mention the book, Peter. We'll mention the book, okay?
464
00:18:30.630 --> 00:18:32.269
I'll do anything but not wipe in your ass.
465
00:18:33.150 --> 00:18:35.109
So with the little kids, they're obviously like get into
466
00:18:35.170 --> 00:18:36.849
school and stuff like that. So is it hard to
467
00:18:36.869 --> 00:18:39.089
do activities with the older ones? Because an 18 and
468
00:18:39.109 --> 00:18:41.190
a 15 year old don't want to be a soft player.
469
00:18:41.269 --> 00:18:43.210
Do you try and do separate stuff with them? Because
470
00:18:43.230 --> 00:18:45.009
it's hard to keep them all happy at those ages.
471
00:18:45.210 --> 00:18:47.690
Mate, that is such a good point because you always
472
00:18:47.750 --> 00:18:50.430
see it around the 15 age where they start to
473
00:18:50.470 --> 00:18:53.329
not want to come to everything. So junior at 15,
474
00:18:53.329 --> 00:18:55.970
he started being like, oh dad, do you mind if
475
00:18:56.150 --> 00:18:58.930
I go see my friend or do you mind if I,
476
00:18:58.950 --> 00:19:01.269
and I'm thinking, I knew it was coming to that stage.
477
00:19:01.869 --> 00:19:05.130
And now Princess is 15. And just the very first
478
00:19:05.170 --> 00:19:06.869
time in the last few months, there's a couple of
479
00:19:07.410 --> 00:19:10.630
family things we've done. And she said, is it OK
480
00:19:10.710 --> 00:19:12.890
if I don't go? So I get it. I get it.
481
00:19:12.890 --> 00:19:15.950
Because I was the same around that time. So that's tricky.
482
00:19:16.859 --> 00:19:18.440
But if we all go for dinners or we do
483
00:19:18.460 --> 00:19:20.119
stuff like that, we always go together.
484
00:19:20.140 --> 00:19:22.740
Oh, that's nice. How big is Christmas then? If you've
485
00:19:22.799 --> 00:19:24.880
got all the kids at yours for Christmas, is that
486
00:19:24.980 --> 00:19:27.819
all brothers and cousins? Because you're from a massive family.
487
00:19:28.059 --> 00:19:30.220
Are they all in the UK? Are they still Australia, Greece,
488
00:19:30.279 --> 00:19:30.900
all spread around?
489
00:19:31.329 --> 00:19:33.359
Yeah, so mum and dad renounced. But you want to
490
00:19:33.400 --> 00:19:36.380
hear the weirdest story? My mum and dad, we grew
491
00:19:36.400 --> 00:19:38.859
up as Jehovah's Witnesses. So even though I'm not a witness.
492
00:19:38.920 --> 00:19:39.259
Did you?
493
00:19:39.440 --> 00:19:40.420
Yeah. I didn't know that.
494
00:19:40.480 --> 00:19:43.450
Mum and dad have devout witnesses, so they don't celebrate Christmas.
495
00:19:43.730 --> 00:19:44.309
Oh, wow.
496
00:19:44.950 --> 00:19:47.369
We never celebrated Christmas until I had kids.
497
00:19:47.450 --> 00:19:48.190
No way.
498
00:19:48.369 --> 00:19:51.240
I never celebrated it. Wow. 18 19 years ago is
499
00:19:51.259 --> 00:19:53.660
the first time i ever celebrated christmas and what.
500
00:19:53.559 --> 00:19:56.500
Was that like that first time you celebrated christmas.
501
00:19:56.740 --> 00:19:59.380
Oh after how much i spend every christmas i'm like
502
00:19:59.400 --> 00:20:00.589
my dad was right.
503
00:20:03.140 --> 00:20:05.079
Were they a little bit put out that you didn't
504
00:20:05.140 --> 00:20:06.299
carry on being a witness?
505
00:20:06.359 --> 00:20:09.160
Yeah, of course. Of course. And you know what? It's
506
00:20:09.200 --> 00:20:12.279
a really tough thing because I love what I learned
507
00:20:12.380 --> 00:20:14.440
and I respect everything I learned. And I'm not one
508
00:20:14.460 --> 00:20:16.640
of these people that leaves a faith and then talks
509
00:20:16.700 --> 00:20:19.440
against it. Because to be honest, when I was bullied
510
00:20:19.500 --> 00:20:22.380
as a kid, the witnesses, they took us in. They
511
00:20:22.400 --> 00:20:24.759
were loving. They didn't care what nationality you were. It
512
00:20:25.000 --> 00:20:27.720
was just the same faith. I guess many faiths are
513
00:20:27.779 --> 00:20:30.579
similar in that way. So I've got nothing but love
514
00:20:30.599 --> 00:20:33.029
for it. But You know, you get to 16 and
515
00:20:33.190 --> 00:20:35.250
there's things you're not allowed to do before you're married.
516
00:20:35.470 --> 00:20:37.450
And when you've got abs like that, you're fighting them off.
517
00:20:37.690 --> 00:20:39.309
You can't have abs like that. It's easy to be
518
00:20:39.349 --> 00:20:41.200
Jehovah's Witness if you're fat and ugly. If you're ripped
519
00:20:41.220 --> 00:20:45.680
like you, it's impossible. Peter Ondra at 17, not allowed
520
00:20:45.700 --> 00:20:46.920
to kiss a girl. Leave it out.
521
00:20:46.960 --> 00:20:49.099
Look at him. And then you just sort of rebel
522
00:20:49.140 --> 00:20:51.400
because you're just kind of doing, you know, you're not
523
00:20:51.420 --> 00:20:53.809
allowed to do anything. And funny enough, even then, when
524
00:20:53.849 --> 00:20:55.910
all that started happening and I left, I still never
525
00:20:55.950 --> 00:20:58.190
celebrated Christmas because I didn't really know how to.
526
00:20:58.430 --> 00:20:59.309
Yeah, of course.
527
00:20:59.509 --> 00:21:01.109
I used to get on a plane when I was
528
00:21:01.150 --> 00:21:03.549
coming to England. I used to get on a plane
529
00:21:03.609 --> 00:21:05.970
on Christmas Day to fly back to Oz because it
530
00:21:06.019 --> 00:21:07.420
was the quietest flight.
531
00:21:07.559 --> 00:21:08.640
Yeah, of course.
532
00:21:09.140 --> 00:21:11.240
And so I used to always fly on Christmas Day,
533
00:21:11.259 --> 00:21:13.980
so I never celebrated it and then had kids and
534
00:21:14.039 --> 00:21:18.160
I was like, but here's the thing, right? Yeah. When
535
00:21:18.220 --> 00:21:21.400
Junior wants a pair of trainers that are more than
536
00:21:21.500 --> 00:21:26.089
what you would buy 500 presents for Millie and Theo,
537
00:21:26.109 --> 00:21:28.609
the traders are the same price. It's like, You end
538
00:21:28.650 --> 00:21:31.849
up buying your older kids one main present and your
539
00:21:31.890 --> 00:21:35.410
younger kids like 30 or 40. So I say to them, look, guys,
540
00:21:36.769 --> 00:21:41.720
wouldn't you rather have 10 or 15 small presents or
541
00:21:41.859 --> 00:21:44.240
one big one? What do you think they go for?
542
00:21:44.440 --> 00:21:45.400
One big one, cash.
543
00:21:45.839 --> 00:21:47.039
Yeah, cash.
544
00:21:47.059 --> 00:21:47.839
Yeah, exactly.
545
00:21:47.859 --> 00:21:49.799
Have you ever tried to sneak your parents over for
546
00:21:49.839 --> 00:21:53.029
Christmas without telling them, like, what are you doing on
547
00:21:53.049 --> 00:21:56.670
the fourth Saturday in December? Might have a bit of dinner.
548
00:21:56.690 --> 00:21:56.769
Yeah.
549
00:21:57.569 --> 00:21:58.380
You don't mind turkey.
550
00:21:58.460 --> 00:22:01.089
I say that to mum and she says, when on
551
00:22:01.150 --> 00:22:05.230
this day when Jesus Christ was... I said, all right, mum. Okay,
552
00:22:05.269 --> 00:22:08.869
I get it. She knows her days, mate. Don't mess
553
00:22:08.910 --> 00:22:09.119
with mum.
554
00:22:09.950 --> 00:22:12.069
So did you have to go door to door when
555
00:22:12.089 --> 00:22:12.730
you were a kid?
556
00:22:13.069 --> 00:22:14.309
Yeah, I sure did.
557
00:22:14.410 --> 00:22:14.710
Wow.
558
00:22:14.970 --> 00:22:17.970
And actually, when I was about 15, there was a
559
00:22:18.009 --> 00:22:21.029
girl I really liked and I was like, we would
560
00:22:21.089 --> 00:22:24.069
see each other and I was thinking, I can't, you're
561
00:22:24.089 --> 00:22:27.589
not allowed to sit on the fence. I remember... I
562
00:22:27.619 --> 00:22:30.210
was getting to a point of thinking, you know, maybe
563
00:22:30.269 --> 00:22:32.950
I need to go my own way. And then someone said, yeah,
564
00:22:32.970 --> 00:22:35.309
but you're a Michael Jackson fan. I'm like, yeah, of course.
565
00:22:35.349 --> 00:22:38.289
Like he was my idol back in those days. And
566
00:22:38.309 --> 00:22:40.410
they said, well, he's a witness because apparently all his
567
00:22:40.450 --> 00:22:43.559
family were witnesses. And they were like Prince, you know, Prince.
568
00:22:43.579 --> 00:22:45.319
I don't know if you know this, but Prince was
569
00:22:45.339 --> 00:22:47.380
a witness too. And so you would think, well, if
570
00:22:47.400 --> 00:22:49.799
they're doing it, I'll do it. Yeah. But then a
571
00:22:49.839 --> 00:22:51.599
year or so later, it just, yeah.
572
00:22:51.839 --> 00:22:54.869
So who are the famous witnesses? Michael Jackson and Prince.
573
00:22:55.069 --> 00:22:59.210
George Benson is an elder. Remember George Benson? Yeah. Remember
574
00:22:59.250 --> 00:23:01.690
Gimme the Night? There's quite a few, you know. I mean,
575
00:23:02.069 --> 00:23:04.349
a lot of actors as well. The thing is, though,
576
00:23:04.390 --> 00:23:07.230
when you're brought up in a faith, you do tend
577
00:23:07.299 --> 00:23:10.000
to be defensive of it. Yeah, of course. Later on
578
00:23:10.059 --> 00:23:12.319
in life, even when you're not part of it, because
579
00:23:12.359 --> 00:23:15.019
you know a lot of what you learned was actually
580
00:23:15.039 --> 00:23:15.700
for your own good.
581
00:23:15.720 --> 00:23:18.440
Have you brought your kids up in any kind of.
582
00:23:18.819 --> 00:23:22.200
So I started to. When Junior and Princess were really small,
583
00:23:22.240 --> 00:23:24.630
I used to take them to the Kingdom Hall, especially
584
00:23:24.650 --> 00:23:27.630
for the memorial, which was once a year. But then
585
00:23:27.650 --> 00:23:30.809
I again had that moment as they started to get
586
00:23:30.890 --> 00:23:33.329
older and went, I've got to let them decide what
587
00:23:33.369 --> 00:23:35.930
they want to do. Because when you bring someone up
588
00:23:36.039 --> 00:23:38.799
in a faith, whatever faith that is, however you bring
589
00:23:38.839 --> 00:23:41.900
someone up, it's instilled in them. Then there's a sense
590
00:23:41.960 --> 00:23:44.299
like with us of real guilt when you're not part
591
00:23:44.319 --> 00:23:46.559
of it anymore. And I want them to be at
592
00:23:46.619 --> 00:23:48.950
an age where they go, yeah, this is what I want.
593
00:23:49.009 --> 00:23:50.750
This is, you know, I'm not sure if that's what
594
00:23:50.769 --> 00:23:53.970
I want to do. So I've left it for that reason.
595
00:23:54.569 --> 00:23:56.349
Is there anything you still take from it? You know,
596
00:23:56.390 --> 00:23:58.789
we're not religious in my family. We do Easter and Christmas.
597
00:23:59.069 --> 00:24:01.829
Are there any little like events, Jehovah's Witness events or
598
00:24:02.250 --> 00:24:04.950
celebrations or anything that you still do and have a
599
00:24:04.990 --> 00:24:05.750
little party for?
600
00:24:06.150 --> 00:24:09.809
Once a year, the memorial, which is like around Easter
601
00:24:09.849 --> 00:24:13.609
time every year. And I do it a lot because
602
00:24:13.730 --> 00:24:16.589
mum's like, are you going to the memorial? She knows.
603
00:24:16.869 --> 00:24:19.170
She doesn't even know the day. She knows the minutes.
604
00:24:19.690 --> 00:24:23.130
He knows the times, even in England, what time it's on. Really? Oh,
605
00:24:23.170 --> 00:24:26.609
she knows. And she's 86. I'm like, okay, mum. Yes,
606
00:24:26.690 --> 00:24:27.490
I'm doing it, mum.
607
00:24:27.529 --> 00:24:28.049
I'll be there.
608
00:24:28.109 --> 00:24:28.670
Don't worry.
609
00:24:28.730 --> 00:24:30.670
And so they look on Zoom and they can see
610
00:24:30.789 --> 00:24:32.390
who's on it, even if they don't see your face.
611
00:24:32.630 --> 00:24:33.250
But I enjoy it.
612
00:24:33.640 --> 00:24:34.859
Yeah, it's really interesting.
613
00:24:34.880 --> 00:24:36.380
I just didn't know that about you. That's such a
614
00:24:36.420 --> 00:24:39.440
fascinating background. And it's so nice to hear someone, you know,
615
00:24:39.460 --> 00:24:41.119
even though you're not involved in it, to talk so
616
00:24:41.180 --> 00:24:43.279
positively about something like that. I think it's a really
617
00:24:43.460 --> 00:24:43.940
great thing.
618
00:24:44.160 --> 00:24:47.289
Yeah. The door-to-door witnessing was always a tough one though,
619
00:24:47.349 --> 00:24:49.829
because when we were kids, we were told, you know,
620
00:24:49.869 --> 00:24:52.269
you've got to go door-to-door and preach the good news
621
00:24:52.309 --> 00:24:54.809
of the kingdom. And there were other words that were
622
00:24:54.829 --> 00:24:57.119
after that. And I grew up and I thought, yeah,
623
00:24:57.130 --> 00:25:00.460
but surely back then when the Bible was written. door
624
00:25:00.480 --> 00:25:03.230
to door mate everyone just lived in tiny villages they
625
00:25:03.250 --> 00:25:05.849
knew everybody there was about 15 people in a village
626
00:25:06.369 --> 00:25:09.490
it's like i'm gonna go preach to my cousin john
627
00:25:09.509 --> 00:25:11.490
yeah come on john let's have a drink look but
628
00:25:11.670 --> 00:25:13.769
you know as time's gone on and we were going
629
00:25:13.809 --> 00:25:16.210
and actually knocking on people's doors that we didn't know
630
00:25:16.250 --> 00:25:17.890
and it was a scary thing.
631
00:25:17.769 --> 00:25:20.269
That must have been tough how often did it go well.
632
00:25:20.450 --> 00:25:23.650
Not often yeah not often but because you've got to
633
00:25:23.710 --> 00:25:27.109
preach it we did But I still understand that it
634
00:25:27.150 --> 00:25:29.609
was a great feeling when someone, because there would be
635
00:25:29.650 --> 00:25:31.609
the odd person, you know, that old saying of like,
636
00:25:32.170 --> 00:25:34.789
if I could just help one person. Yeah. You know,
637
00:25:34.849 --> 00:25:37.069
and there would be times when people would be like
638
00:25:37.630 --> 00:25:40.190
life changing for them because they were searching for something
639
00:25:40.230 --> 00:25:42.890
and then you just turned up. Yeah. I always used
640
00:25:42.910 --> 00:25:44.890
to wonder, I wonder what they did when Michael Jackson
641
00:25:44.910 --> 00:25:47.470
knocked on the door. He used to go witnessing. Do
642
00:25:47.490 --> 00:25:47.789
you know?
643
00:25:47.890 --> 00:25:48.529
I didn't know.
644
00:25:49.250 --> 00:25:51.390
He used to go, apparently he used to go in
645
00:25:51.410 --> 00:25:54.480
his car because his brother told me. His brother Tito,
646
00:25:54.829 --> 00:25:58.430
he said that Adol would walk door to door and
647
00:25:58.490 --> 00:26:01.289
Michael would be in a car, stop, get out, go
648
00:26:01.329 --> 00:26:03.390
knock on the door. If it was positive, he would talk.
649
00:26:03.450 --> 00:26:05.210
If it wasn't, he'd get back in the car and
650
00:26:05.329 --> 00:26:06.089
get to the next person.
651
00:26:06.109 --> 00:26:08.910
Just kind of moonwalk away. That's how he developed the moonwalk.
652
00:26:09.220 --> 00:26:11.640
Just creeping away from the house.
653
00:26:12.640 --> 00:26:13.980
That's quite good, actually. I like that.
654
00:26:14.079 --> 00:26:16.859
Let's talk about your kid's book. What an absolute gear
655
00:26:16.920 --> 00:26:19.759
change that is, eh? That was like the one show,
656
00:26:19.799 --> 00:26:21.140
wasn't it? That was unbelievable.
657
00:26:21.160 --> 00:26:25.160
Jehovah's Witnesses to Super Space Kid Save Planet Drizzle Bottom,
658
00:26:25.519 --> 00:26:28.000
which after hearing about your kid needing their bum wiped
659
00:26:28.059 --> 00:26:29.180
really takes on a new meaning.
660
00:26:29.299 --> 00:26:30.779
Absolutely, absolutely.
661
00:26:30.799 --> 00:26:33.980
Absolutely covered everything in this show. There's something for everyone.
662
00:26:34.240 --> 00:26:35.400
Something for everyone.
663
00:26:35.460 --> 00:26:39.329
Oh, gosh. Well, first of all, they placed it. Elastica
664
00:26:39.369 --> 00:26:41.049
placed it really nicely here.
665
00:26:41.069 --> 00:26:42.529
Oh, there it is. Show us it. Get it in
666
00:26:42.569 --> 00:26:43.170
front of the camera.
667
00:26:43.750 --> 00:26:44.089
Here we go.
668
00:26:44.109 --> 00:26:47.599
So this is a kid's picture book for ages three plus,
669
00:26:48.140 --> 00:26:50.640
and it's based on the stories you make up stories
670
00:26:50.700 --> 00:26:52.240
at bedtime with the kids. Is that correct?
671
00:26:52.400 --> 00:26:52.619
Yeah.
672
00:26:52.880 --> 00:26:54.960
It's called Why Won't You Wipe Your Own Ass, isn't it?
673
00:26:54.980 --> 00:26:55.420
Exactly.
674
00:26:55.480 --> 00:26:57.640
It's just written in Greek, but basically, yes, it means
675
00:26:57.700 --> 00:26:58.529
exactly that.
676
00:26:59.009 --> 00:27:02.029
And so you came up with these stories at bedtime, right? Yes.
677
00:27:02.069 --> 00:27:05.759
So it goes back to the childhood again, because... And
678
00:27:05.799 --> 00:27:08.180
I know it sounds weird, but I didn't really read books.
679
00:27:08.259 --> 00:27:10.079
Like the only books I had anything to do with
680
00:27:10.119 --> 00:27:12.500
was the Bible or anything kind of biblical when I
681
00:27:12.519 --> 00:27:14.160
was a kid. Yeah. You know, all the kind of
682
00:27:14.339 --> 00:27:15.359
Bible story books.
683
00:27:15.619 --> 00:27:17.750
And Drizzle Bottom was one of Jesus's nicknames, wasn't it?
684
00:27:17.769 --> 00:27:18.680
Quite famously.
685
00:27:18.990 --> 00:27:21.930
I thought when I got to reading for the kids,
686
00:27:22.289 --> 00:27:24.069
you know, you have to do it as a dad. Yeah.
687
00:27:24.549 --> 00:27:27.670
I couldn't concentrate when I was reading it. Yeah. I'd
688
00:27:27.690 --> 00:27:30.539
start going off on a tangent. And I've always been
689
00:27:30.599 --> 00:27:33.019
fascinated by sci-fi. Back to the Future is one of
690
00:27:33.059 --> 00:27:35.680
my favourites. The trilogy is one of my favorites and
691
00:27:35.759 --> 00:27:39.140
also Close Encounters, one of the best, right?
692
00:27:39.160 --> 00:27:39.640
Yeah.
693
00:27:39.779 --> 00:27:43.299
I started talking about space travel and life on other
694
00:27:43.339 --> 00:27:45.599
planets and all that sort of stuff. And as time
695
00:27:45.640 --> 00:27:47.400
went on, I just put the books down. I just
696
00:27:47.420 --> 00:27:50.519
started creating these stories with them and every night we'd
697
00:27:50.559 --> 00:27:53.119
go to a different planner and they'd solve these problems.
698
00:27:53.180 --> 00:27:56.119
And so I just went to Scholastic and said, look,
699
00:27:56.200 --> 00:27:58.200
I've got this idea for a book and they were like,
700
00:27:58.269 --> 00:28:00.630
we love it. And they said, actually, we'd love a
701
00:28:00.690 --> 00:28:04.390
series of this subject. So- They said to me, can
702
00:28:04.430 --> 00:28:07.509
you please give us 800 words, put 800 words down
703
00:28:08.049 --> 00:28:12.410
by September? This was July. They said, if you can
704
00:28:12.430 --> 00:28:15.519
give us 800 words by September. That afternoon, I sent
705
00:28:15.559 --> 00:28:17.480
them nearly 4,000 words, right?
706
00:28:17.559 --> 00:28:20.099
You'd already written it, haven't you?
707
00:28:20.180 --> 00:28:22.380
I'd just written the whole thing, sent it to them,
708
00:28:22.420 --> 00:28:24.430
and they were like, okay, we've got to cut it down,
709
00:28:24.470 --> 00:28:25.670
but we love this idea.
710
00:28:25.690 --> 00:28:29.329
A bit keen, Peter, but yeah, you know.
711
00:28:29.349 --> 00:28:31.130
Yeah, exactly what they thought.
712
00:28:31.170 --> 00:28:34.559
I suppose you've written the books already, making the stories
713
00:28:34.640 --> 00:28:35.579
up in front of your kids.
714
00:28:35.660 --> 00:28:35.880
Yeah.
715
00:28:36.000 --> 00:28:37.480
You actually just get them down on paper. A bit
716
00:28:37.500 --> 00:28:39.400
like Noel Gallagher with his first two albums, isn't it?
717
00:28:39.660 --> 00:28:40.279
He'd already written them.
718
00:28:40.460 --> 00:28:43.240
Absolutely, yeah. And that's the thing. When it comes from you,
719
00:28:43.299 --> 00:28:45.519
it's just you think, well, if my kids love it,
720
00:28:45.559 --> 00:28:47.569
hopefully other kids will love it. And that's why we've
721
00:28:47.609 --> 00:28:49.640
done it. So hopefully they will love it.
722
00:28:49.890 --> 00:28:50.309
Oh, brilliant.
723
00:28:50.619 --> 00:28:53.200
Of your kids, they must be really excited because obviously
724
00:28:53.259 --> 00:28:55.160
these are the stories that you've told them and now
725
00:28:55.200 --> 00:28:58.279
they physically exist. I know they're now a bit old
726
00:28:58.339 --> 00:29:01.079
maybe for them, but what have they made of these books?
727
00:29:01.380 --> 00:29:04.220
They love it, but they can't understand the concept that
728
00:29:04.259 --> 00:29:06.269
it's a book that other people are going to read.
729
00:29:06.380 --> 00:29:08.670
They think that we made this book and printed it
730
00:29:08.730 --> 00:29:11.450
for them. It's like, you know, when you do a
731
00:29:11.490 --> 00:29:15.650
photo album, that's what they think I've done. They're like, oh,
732
00:29:15.690 --> 00:29:17.849
thank you for my present. And I'm like, no, I'm
733
00:29:17.869 --> 00:29:20.009
going to give this to your headmaster. Why are you
734
00:29:20.029 --> 00:29:22.440
giving my book to the headmaster because their names are
735
00:29:22.480 --> 00:29:24.759
in it it's about them millie and theo so i.
736
00:29:24.720 --> 00:29:26.559
Suppose if the kids reading it on the train they'll
737
00:29:26.579 --> 00:29:29.180
go they've nicked my book yeah that's exactly right and
738
00:29:29.200 --> 00:29:32.140
you're like no anyone can buy it have.
739
00:29:32.019 --> 00:29:34.529
You gone into schools and stuff have you done that.
740
00:29:34.369 --> 00:29:36.690
Yet no not yet not yet i only got released
741
00:29:36.730 --> 00:29:38.410
today it's one of those things of like i don't
742
00:29:38.470 --> 00:29:40.150
even know if it's going to do anything i don't
743
00:29:40.190 --> 00:29:41.670
even know if it's going to sell anything, but I'm
744
00:29:41.710 --> 00:29:43.819
just glad I'm doing it. But I know with these things,
745
00:29:43.839 --> 00:29:46.960
they can escalate quickly. If it sells, then you'll get
746
00:29:47.000 --> 00:29:48.859
invited to. Yeah. It'll be fun.
747
00:29:48.920 --> 00:29:50.059
You'll be invited to school.
748
00:29:50.079 --> 00:29:51.390
You'll be invited to schools. I'll get you.
749
00:29:51.619 --> 00:29:53.059
I'll come to your guys' school.
750
00:29:53.079 --> 00:29:54.579
Yeah, we'll have to come to my kid's school.
751
00:29:54.599 --> 00:29:55.140
Let's play you right.
752
00:29:55.200 --> 00:29:57.960
Lou would love it. First gig was you at Croydon.
753
00:29:58.450 --> 00:29:58.849
My wife.
754
00:29:59.029 --> 00:29:59.670
No way.
755
00:29:59.690 --> 00:30:01.349
Obsessed with you, Peter. It's actually up soon.
756
00:30:01.450 --> 00:30:04.069
No way. When are you talking about? How many years ago?
757
00:30:04.690 --> 00:30:06.630
She's 37 now. I think she's probably about 15. It
758
00:30:06.710 --> 00:30:10.349
would have been your first UK tour. So, Fairfield Hall.
759
00:30:10.450 --> 00:30:10.849
That's the one.
760
00:30:10.869 --> 00:30:12.319
Fairfield Hall. No way.
761
00:30:12.519 --> 00:30:12.880
She was there.
762
00:30:12.890 --> 00:30:15.559
I've only ever done that once. So, I know that night.
763
00:30:16.059 --> 00:30:19.099
And it was the first time ever I had my
764
00:30:19.279 --> 00:30:21.619
trousers ripped off.
765
00:30:21.779 --> 00:30:23.339
Rob's got them on the wall in the setting room.
766
00:30:23.380 --> 00:30:24.119
Lou capped them.
767
00:30:25.819 --> 00:30:29.160
I knew it was there. No, I'm just joking. But
768
00:30:29.220 --> 00:30:32.160
I remember that night so well because it had never
769
00:30:32.240 --> 00:30:34.880
been so crazy because I'd come from Australia and I
770
00:30:34.920 --> 00:30:37.880
was unknown. We were just starting and I remember doing
771
00:30:37.920 --> 00:30:40.099
Fairfield Tour and I refer to it all the time now.
772
00:30:40.559 --> 00:30:41.740
It's an iconic gig.
773
00:30:41.819 --> 00:30:43.099
About that particular night.
774
00:30:43.119 --> 00:30:43.720
Like Nebworth.
775
00:30:43.799 --> 00:30:45.920
If she's got a photo, I'd love to see that.
776
00:30:46.000 --> 00:30:46.579
Oh dear, I don't know.
777
00:30:46.599 --> 00:30:47.400
A lot of me naked.
778
00:30:47.480 --> 00:30:49.359
How did you end up having your trousers ripped off?
779
00:30:49.400 --> 00:30:50.480
Were you going into the crowd?
780
00:30:50.519 --> 00:30:51.599
She's very strong, isn't she?
781
00:30:53.009 --> 00:30:56.339
Mate, she's got some power. They didn't completely come off,
782
00:30:56.359 --> 00:30:58.680
but they were completely ripped. I'll never forget it. And
783
00:30:58.720 --> 00:31:01.200
I was holding on to them like this. Amazing. It
784
00:31:01.240 --> 00:31:02.000
was a mad night.
785
00:31:02.059 --> 00:31:02.859
But the abs were out.
786
00:31:02.900 --> 00:31:03.160
Yeah.
787
00:31:03.400 --> 00:31:05.339
But yeah, she speaks fondly of that night in Croydon.
788
00:31:05.539 --> 00:31:06.509
She took her dad with her.
789
00:31:06.589 --> 00:31:09.130
To be honest, mate, she speaks to me fondly about
790
00:31:09.170 --> 00:31:11.049
you as well.
791
00:31:11.490 --> 00:31:13.809
Have you ever had to go take your kids to
792
00:31:13.849 --> 00:31:16.089
gigs and stuff like that? Because she was too young
793
00:31:16.109 --> 00:31:17.569
to go on her own. So her dad went with
794
00:31:17.589 --> 00:31:20.690
her to your gig at Croydon. Have you been dragged
795
00:31:20.750 --> 00:31:23.430
along to stuff like mad drum and bass gigs or
796
00:31:23.470 --> 00:31:26.319
this new boy band or girl band or K-pop and
797
00:31:26.339 --> 00:31:27.960
you're stood there going, what is this?
798
00:31:28.240 --> 00:31:32.279
Yeah. I remember once, because my kids like, they like
799
00:31:32.319 --> 00:31:35.099
certain people. So I sometimes will go and take them
800
00:31:35.200 --> 00:31:37.900
to see those groups or that band. Yeah. And it
801
00:31:37.980 --> 00:31:40.880
is interesting seeing it from the other side. But then
802
00:31:40.920 --> 00:31:43.319
they get very quickly, they grow out of that stage
803
00:31:43.339 --> 00:31:45.380
where they don't want their parents to go with them.
804
00:31:45.420 --> 00:31:46.759
They want someone else to take them.
805
00:31:46.920 --> 00:31:48.910
It's only a short period of time. But it's weird
806
00:31:48.950 --> 00:31:50.930
because they don't want their parents there, but they would
807
00:31:50.970 --> 00:31:52.450
quite happily go with their friend's dad.
808
00:31:52.809 --> 00:31:54.089
Yeah. Yeah, 100%.
809
00:31:54.089 --> 00:31:56.289
And that's fine and whatever. But then the kid always
810
00:31:56.349 --> 00:31:57.990
is like, oh God, I don't want my dad to
811
00:31:58.029 --> 00:31:58.490
come with me.
812
00:31:58.630 --> 00:32:02.660
It's so true because like one of my daughter's friends,
813
00:32:03.180 --> 00:32:08.049
her dad's a chef, right? Unreal cook. But- He'll say,
814
00:32:08.089 --> 00:32:11.349
I want to go to Millie's house because her dad's
815
00:32:12.430 --> 00:32:14.509
a really good cook and you should learn, you should
816
00:32:15.210 --> 00:32:17.849
take from him. And I'm thinking, I can't even cook
817
00:32:17.910 --> 00:32:19.589
anywhere near like he does. But what I'm saying is
818
00:32:19.609 --> 00:32:22.470
this whole thing of the kids always, their mates' parents
819
00:32:22.509 --> 00:32:25.470
are always better. Yeah, of course. It's that sort of thing,
820
00:32:25.509 --> 00:32:25.769
you know.
821
00:32:25.789 --> 00:32:28.589
Have you done anything career-wise where you've gone, I'm doing
822
00:32:28.630 --> 00:32:30.230
this because this will impress my kids.
823
00:32:30.289 --> 00:32:30.869
Do you know what I mean?
824
00:32:30.930 --> 00:32:32.670
I'm going to go on this show that they love
825
00:32:32.690 --> 00:32:35.210
or I'm going to do this song that I know
826
00:32:35.299 --> 00:32:36.019
means a lot to them.
827
00:32:36.539 --> 00:32:40.200
A hundred percent. This one's a classic. And I got
828
00:32:40.240 --> 00:32:44.539
a call from the people that do the Teletubbies and
829
00:32:44.579 --> 00:32:47.140
they said, oh, we want to do an album of
830
00:32:47.160 --> 00:32:50.009
the Teletubbies 30 years or something. I can't remember what
831
00:32:50.029 --> 00:32:52.170
it was. And I said, oh, okay, what would you
832
00:32:52.190 --> 00:32:54.710
like me to do? Like present it to them or something?
833
00:32:54.750 --> 00:32:57.750
I said, no, we want you to be their manager
834
00:32:57.789 --> 00:32:59.529
for this campaign we're going to do. And it's going
835
00:32:59.549 --> 00:33:03.279
to be hilarious. And you can say that, you know, Simon,
836
00:33:03.410 --> 00:33:05.279
you know, watch it, watch it. You know, we're going
837
00:33:05.299 --> 00:33:07.680
to be number one this year and all that. And
838
00:33:07.740 --> 00:33:10.460
I said, so basically I'm going to make a fool
839
00:33:10.480 --> 00:33:13.730
of myself. Then I thought about Millie and Theo and
840
00:33:13.769 --> 00:33:15.690
I said, hang on, does that mean Tendi Tubbies get
841
00:33:15.710 --> 00:33:17.789
to come to my house? He goes, yeah, we're going
842
00:33:17.809 --> 00:33:19.769
to need to film at your house with them.
843
00:33:19.910 --> 00:33:20.569
Amazing.
844
00:33:20.630 --> 00:33:23.710
You're going to need to be having a meeting and saying, right,
845
00:33:23.769 --> 00:33:25.170
you need to get up there and you need to
846
00:33:25.190 --> 00:33:27.130
give it your best. We've got to compete with Simon Cowell.
847
00:33:27.150 --> 00:33:29.650
And I think it was Coldplay that were competing for
848
00:33:29.690 --> 00:33:31.410
the same thing. You've got to get up there and
849
00:33:31.430 --> 00:33:34.230
we've got to fight against Coldplay and all that. And, mate,
850
00:33:34.289 --> 00:33:37.059
having them round and my kids' faces, the little ones.
851
00:33:37.539 --> 00:33:38.190
Oh, wow.
852
00:33:38.259 --> 00:33:40.619
Oh, really? Although, Theo said to me the other day,
853
00:33:40.660 --> 00:33:43.500
he sticks, he goes, Dad, you know when the Teletubbies
854
00:33:43.539 --> 00:33:45.960
game over? I said, yeah, he goes, one of them
855
00:33:46.019 --> 00:33:50.720
had really hairy hands. It was all mesh. I could
856
00:33:50.779 --> 00:33:52.920
see through it. It was a really hairy hand. I said, look,
857
00:33:53.490 --> 00:33:56.849
Teletubbies are hairy on the inside. They're not really hairy
858
00:33:56.890 --> 00:33:58.529
on the outside, Rob. I'm thinking, how am I going
859
00:33:58.549 --> 00:34:02.029
to explain this? I was brilliant. But yeah, I did
860
00:34:02.049 --> 00:34:04.200
that for them and it was brilliant. And the album flopped.
861
00:34:04.420 --> 00:34:04.779
Oh, did it?
862
00:34:05.059 --> 00:34:06.039
Oh, really?
863
00:34:07.200 --> 00:34:09.639
So, win some, lose some.
864
00:34:09.719 --> 00:34:11.679
It was worth it, though. It was worth it for
865
00:34:11.719 --> 00:34:12.659
having the Teletubbies in your house.
866
00:34:12.719 --> 00:34:15.159
Well, I think that's why, you know, you've had such
867
00:34:15.179 --> 00:34:17.210
a long career and so popular is you don't take
868
00:34:17.230 --> 00:34:18.030
yourself too serious.
869
00:34:18.070 --> 00:34:18.909
No, you can't.
870
00:34:18.989 --> 00:34:21.050
If the kids get to experience the Teletubbies being around
871
00:34:21.070 --> 00:34:22.369
your house, it's a funny story, isn't it?
872
00:34:22.530 --> 00:34:22.909
Absolutely.
873
00:34:22.929 --> 00:34:26.000
Absolutely. You can't, mate, because when I was younger, I did.
874
00:34:26.059 --> 00:34:28.440
And I say it a lot lately because I think
875
00:34:28.480 --> 00:34:31.159
I reflect a lot now, but I don't like who
876
00:34:31.260 --> 00:34:33.780
I became at one point. I don't like that. And
877
00:34:33.800 --> 00:34:35.429
I think, you know, when you get older and your
878
00:34:35.449 --> 00:34:38.570
kids get older, they humble you really quickly because they
879
00:34:38.590 --> 00:34:40.869
tell you what's real. And you kind of look back
880
00:34:40.909 --> 00:34:43.769
and go, yeah, you know, as I'm glad now I
881
00:34:43.809 --> 00:34:44.250
don't take.
882
00:34:44.309 --> 00:34:44.889
No, I don't.
883
00:34:45.030 --> 00:34:47.769
Not at all. Because no one cares. That's the thing.
884
00:34:47.849 --> 00:34:48.769
No one cares.
885
00:34:48.909 --> 00:34:51.269
Do they like Mysterious Girl, your kids?
886
00:34:52.610 --> 00:34:53.900
Um. Yeah, they do.
887
00:34:53.920 --> 00:34:54.900
Have they seen the video?
888
00:34:55.079 --> 00:34:57.619
I don't think my youngest two have, no. No. Well, no,
889
00:34:57.679 --> 00:34:59.599
I think the question on all their lips would be
890
00:34:59.619 --> 00:35:02.340
the same as everyone's. Why were you wearing jeans in
891
00:35:02.360 --> 00:35:06.130
the stage? You know what I mean? It's like, I
892
00:35:06.170 --> 00:35:08.329
don't want to have to have that conversation with them
893
00:35:08.369 --> 00:35:08.889
just yet.
894
00:35:10.070 --> 00:35:12.070
But I suppose when you're old, your boys get a
895
00:35:12.090 --> 00:35:14.170
bit like, you get cocky and stuff and they're going
896
00:35:14.190 --> 00:35:15.860
to the gym a bit. You can go, have a
897
00:35:15.860 --> 00:35:16.179
look at that.
898
00:35:16.199 --> 00:35:16.760
Have a look at that.
899
00:35:16.780 --> 00:35:18.349
That's going to the gym. Come on.
900
00:35:18.449 --> 00:35:20.409
What was going on with your hair? How much product
901
00:35:20.449 --> 00:35:21.550
in your hair in that video?
902
00:35:21.670 --> 00:35:24.510
It was disgraceful. So you know what I used to do?
903
00:35:24.849 --> 00:35:26.769
I used to use this can of Silhouette. Do you
904
00:35:26.789 --> 00:35:28.090
know Silhouette? Have you ever heard of it?
905
00:35:28.110 --> 00:35:28.610
No, no.
906
00:35:28.750 --> 00:35:31.550
It's a lacquer. Yeah, yeah. Right, and it's called Silhouette.
907
00:35:31.570 --> 00:35:33.050
We used to call it the Black Death because it
908
00:35:33.090 --> 00:35:36.210
was a black bottle. It was so strong. And in
909
00:35:36.250 --> 00:35:38.050
the 80s and 90s when we used to go out
910
00:35:38.070 --> 00:35:40.650
and have long curly hair, I used to spray half
911
00:35:40.690 --> 00:35:43.239
a bottle of this going out one night. It was
912
00:35:43.280 --> 00:35:45.519
like a rock. Yeah, yeah. You could balance your mate
913
00:35:45.599 --> 00:35:47.969
on it, right? Yeah. So I used to do that
914
00:35:48.070 --> 00:35:50.449
even in the mysterious gold days because my hair was
915
00:35:50.510 --> 00:35:53.119
curly and I had to strain it for that to
916
00:35:53.219 --> 00:35:56.889
sit there. I had to use this lacquer, right? Right.
917
00:35:57.179 --> 00:35:59.320
The problem was with it, so much product, but the
918
00:35:59.360 --> 00:36:00.880
problem was when you'd have a cup of tea, you
919
00:36:00.920 --> 00:36:03.820
had to move it. Because if you didn't, it would
920
00:36:03.880 --> 00:36:05.960
dip into the tea and your tea would just get
921
00:36:06.000 --> 00:36:10.280
this little film of just lacquer on it. True, true.
922
00:36:10.760 --> 00:36:12.800
About your younger kids, after you put their faces out there,
923
00:36:12.840 --> 00:36:16.030
your youngest two, you're a bit more reserved with their
924
00:36:16.139 --> 00:36:17.179
image online and stuff.
925
00:36:17.389 --> 00:36:19.769
I have to be honest. That's an Emily thing. I've
926
00:36:19.789 --> 00:36:21.710
got to respect her for that because she was, I
927
00:36:21.750 --> 00:36:24.420
would have just done it naturally for It's hard not to, yeah. Yeah,
928
00:36:24.440 --> 00:36:26.619
you get excited and you want to show them, you know.
929
00:36:26.880 --> 00:36:29.119
Because obviously with your elder two, you had a reality
930
00:36:29.139 --> 00:36:30.179
show at some point as well.
931
00:36:30.219 --> 00:36:30.380
Yeah.
932
00:36:30.619 --> 00:36:32.909
And you were almost like a trailblazer for that, really.
933
00:36:32.929 --> 00:36:35.150
And then since then, there's been like Towie. And then
934
00:36:35.170 --> 00:36:36.849
you see like the Fern McCann have got a show
935
00:36:36.869 --> 00:36:39.190
with their kids and Billy and Sam Fares. And not
936
00:36:39.250 --> 00:36:41.949
just on TV, but like online and Instagram and stuff
937
00:36:41.969 --> 00:36:42.159
like that.
938
00:36:42.320 --> 00:36:42.530
Yeah.
939
00:36:42.570 --> 00:36:45.219
You know, we share our private lives. It's a reality show,
940
00:36:45.260 --> 00:36:46.960
but a podcast for me and Josh really about our
941
00:36:47.280 --> 00:36:49.590
wives and kids. And then On Instagram, everyone's sort of
942
00:36:49.610 --> 00:36:52.480
got their kids and stuff involved. There's like mummy influencers,
943
00:36:52.539 --> 00:36:54.900
dad influencers. And as someone who was there sort of
944
00:36:54.920 --> 00:36:56.280
at the beginning, is there anything you sort of like
945
00:36:56.400 --> 00:36:59.610
learned from that period that you reflect on? Because, you know,
946
00:36:59.619 --> 00:37:01.530
you're the first people to do it, not knowing what
947
00:37:01.730 --> 00:37:03.130
would go on to happen with it all.
948
00:37:03.389 --> 00:37:06.510
The repercussions of it. You're right, because the thing is,
949
00:37:06.929 --> 00:37:09.360
it's been really good having two that have done it
950
00:37:09.460 --> 00:37:11.730
and two that haven't. Because the two that have done
951
00:37:11.789 --> 00:37:14.489
it are kind of aware of the pitfalls and they
952
00:37:14.530 --> 00:37:17.780
don't take anything seriously. And I say, guys, don't read comments.
953
00:37:18.320 --> 00:37:20.940
And I say, whatever you put online, remember, people are
954
00:37:20.980 --> 00:37:22.739
going to see it and they're going to comment on it.
955
00:37:22.760 --> 00:37:25.360
So be a bit careful. And then Ginny will say, yeah,
956
00:37:25.380 --> 00:37:27.440
but were you careful when you used to sail or
957
00:37:27.480 --> 00:37:29.460
do things in the past? And I said, no, I
958
00:37:29.480 --> 00:37:31.820
don't want you to make the same mistake. I was stupid.
959
00:37:32.420 --> 00:37:34.500
But they know the pitfalls and they're aware of it.
960
00:37:34.519 --> 00:37:37.769
So that's good on that side. The other side, and Emily,
961
00:37:37.809 --> 00:37:39.570
and I praise her for it because she's like, I'm
962
00:37:39.630 --> 00:37:42.170
not having million Theo spaces out there. And I find
963
00:37:42.190 --> 00:37:44.889
that's absolutely, I respect that. Yeah. The good thing is
964
00:37:45.860 --> 00:37:49.059
they go anywhere and no one has a clue who
965
00:37:49.099 --> 00:37:52.000
they are, what they do. And they're not, it's not
966
00:37:52.039 --> 00:37:54.019
about treating anyone different. It's I don't want them to
967
00:37:54.119 --> 00:37:58.320
feel different. Emily didn't want them to feel different. And
968
00:37:58.440 --> 00:38:02.159
I understand that. So it's kind of good seeing you
969
00:38:02.179 --> 00:38:05.300
on both sides. But yeah, Ginny and Prince are pretty
970
00:38:05.340 --> 00:38:08.110
good with it because- sometimes and say if you put
971
00:38:08.150 --> 00:38:09.690
something on and you think it's going to get a
972
00:38:09.730 --> 00:38:13.030
bad reaction you either turn your comments off or you
973
00:38:13.050 --> 00:38:15.190
just don't put it on like don't fall into that
974
00:38:15.260 --> 00:38:17.539
world of negativity it's not nice at all.
975
00:38:17.440 --> 00:38:19.639
You're just so positive and it feels like you're very
976
00:38:19.699 --> 00:38:22.980
measured you're like very calm and collected and because you've
977
00:38:23.000 --> 00:38:25.550
been in the headlines and all sorts of things and
978
00:38:25.610 --> 00:38:28.750
like especially now of like trolling and online and comments
979
00:38:28.809 --> 00:38:30.809
and not even if you're on the telly but you
980
00:38:30.829 --> 00:38:33.389
know you can see it with kids at school groups
981
00:38:33.449 --> 00:38:35.980
on whatsapp or roblox where people are talking about and
982
00:38:36.000 --> 00:38:38.599
said they did this there's photos and videos like what
983
00:38:38.619 --> 00:38:40.519
advice would you give to anyone that is on the
984
00:38:40.639 --> 00:38:43.500
end of negative attention for whatever reason because you seem
985
00:38:43.519 --> 00:38:44.420
to deal with it really.
986
00:38:44.260 --> 00:38:47.320
Well it's really tough and i've had my fair share
987
00:38:47.340 --> 00:38:50.639
when twitter first came out and before there was such
988
00:38:50.699 --> 00:38:53.679
thing as trolls and yeah before people really knew what
989
00:38:53.719 --> 00:38:56.900
it meant ah mate it was horrific at the start
990
00:38:57.340 --> 00:38:58.760
And I never knew how to handle it. And then
991
00:38:58.820 --> 00:39:01.769
I thought, well, the first thing I stopped doing was
992
00:39:01.889 --> 00:39:04.349
reading because I thought if you're reading something and you
993
00:39:04.369 --> 00:39:07.389
see the first negative word, like I hate, as soon
994
00:39:07.409 --> 00:39:09.630
as you see that, just block it before you read
995
00:39:09.650 --> 00:39:10.969
the rest of it. Because once you've read it, you
996
00:39:11.010 --> 00:39:15.230
can't unsee it. And then I thought, you know, God,
997
00:39:15.269 --> 00:39:18.260
I'm choosing to go on these things. So you're fair game.
998
00:39:18.280 --> 00:39:20.199
So you just got to put up with whatever's said.
999
00:39:20.840 --> 00:39:22.179
And then I thought, but I have to do it
1000
00:39:22.199 --> 00:39:23.880
because it's my job. And if I don't do it,
1001
00:39:23.920 --> 00:39:24.300
then you.
1002
00:39:24.650 --> 00:39:26.239
Of course, you've got to promo your book and the
1003
00:39:26.659 --> 00:39:29.150
publishers expect that, that kind of stuff. You need the platforms.
1004
00:39:29.929 --> 00:39:33.150
Exactly, because they'll say, well, what's your insights? How many followers?
1005
00:39:33.170 --> 00:39:35.190
You know, that's a lot of what happens now, whereas
1006
00:39:35.510 --> 00:39:39.340
back in the 90s, there was no such thing. So
1007
00:39:39.469 --> 00:39:41.679
I do try and tell them, look, you know, depending
1008
00:39:41.719 --> 00:39:43.179
on what kind of job you want to do, yeah,
1009
00:39:43.199 --> 00:39:45.019
it could be important to that, but use it as
1010
00:39:45.059 --> 00:39:47.699
a work tool, which sounds a bit odd when you're 16, 17. Yeah.
1011
00:39:49.230 --> 00:39:51.769
But I think they'll eventually get it. I don't know
1012
00:39:51.829 --> 00:39:55.130
if Emily will let Millie and Theo have things like that.
1013
00:39:55.489 --> 00:39:58.860
Junie and Princess weren't allowed to even have Instagram until
1014
00:39:58.880 --> 00:40:00.860
they were 14 and it had to be on private.
1015
00:40:01.599 --> 00:40:04.940
Although my daughter didn't listen, standard. And I wanted to
1016
00:40:04.980 --> 00:40:07.219
see for a year what kind of things they post
1017
00:40:07.239 --> 00:40:09.840
to know whether it would be okay publicly. But I've
1018
00:40:09.880 --> 00:40:11.059
made mistakes in the past.
1019
00:40:11.400 --> 00:40:14.110
I think that's really good to go like, I've made mistakes,
1020
00:40:14.119 --> 00:40:16.369
so learn from it rather than pretending you're some kind
1021
00:40:16.409 --> 00:40:20.489
of know-it-all parent that grown-ups can't make mistakes. I think
1022
00:40:20.510 --> 00:40:21.989
that's a really healthy way of parenting.
1023
00:40:22.030 --> 00:40:24.960
I've made some schnockers, even when I look back at
1024
00:40:24.980 --> 00:40:27.860
some reality shows now, and I think, I hate that
1025
00:40:27.940 --> 00:40:32.400
I became a certain way, that I had arrogance. I
1026
00:40:32.519 --> 00:40:35.400
can't believe that, you know, and you only know that
1027
00:40:35.599 --> 00:40:36.849
once you've grown up.
1028
00:40:37.079 --> 00:40:37.860
Yeah, totally.
1029
00:40:38.000 --> 00:40:41.179
It's very brave and also like admirable to reflect on
1030
00:40:41.199 --> 00:40:43.949
that and go, I was not very nice then or
1031
00:40:44.070 --> 00:40:46.329
I did something I regret then rather than go, no, no, no,
1032
00:40:46.349 --> 00:40:47.949
it was fine. You know, it does show growth to
1033
00:40:47.989 --> 00:40:51.789
accept sometimes you may have done things and anyone does
1034
00:40:52.090 --> 00:40:53.130
in a way you sort of regret.
1035
00:40:53.880 --> 00:40:56.659
With the children's books and stuff now, you're obviously you've
1036
00:40:56.679 --> 00:40:58.159
done the first one. Have you got them all locked
1037
00:40:58.199 --> 00:40:59.320
and loaded, ready to go?
1038
00:40:59.340 --> 00:41:03.510
Yeah, I'm a bit too keen now. It's happening again.
1039
00:41:03.530 --> 00:41:05.809
They're sending 4,000 words a day. They're like, we're going
1040
00:41:05.829 --> 00:41:07.949
to have to block this guy's email address. It's really
1041
00:41:07.969 --> 00:41:08.840
getting too much for us.
1042
00:41:08.849 --> 00:41:09.750
They're like, get rid of it.
1043
00:41:09.889 --> 00:41:10.590
It's spamming us.
1044
00:41:10.610 --> 00:41:11.409
It's spamming us.
1045
00:41:12.949 --> 00:41:16.269
Absolutely. Yeah, no, I'm ready to go. It's funny because
1046
00:41:16.309 --> 00:41:17.889
I thought at 50, I always said, oh, when I
1047
00:41:17.929 --> 00:41:20.699
get to 50, I'll chill out. And then I don't
1048
00:41:20.719 --> 00:41:22.719
know whether it was the pandemic or whatever, but when
1049
00:41:22.760 --> 00:41:24.420
you had a year or two years of doing nothing
1050
00:41:24.460 --> 00:41:26.360
and I realized how bored I could get when I'm
1051
00:41:26.380 --> 00:41:26.920
doing nothing.
1052
00:41:26.940 --> 00:41:27.019
Yeah.
1053
00:41:27.719 --> 00:41:30.119
I'm like, nah, I've got to work. I've just got
1054
00:41:30.139 --> 00:41:30.780
to work, yeah.
1055
00:41:30.800 --> 00:41:32.360
Do you want to do the final question, Josh?
1056
00:41:32.730 --> 00:41:34.829
Yeah, we always end on the same question, which is,
1057
00:41:35.090 --> 00:41:37.809
if your partner was listening, is there one thing that
1058
00:41:37.829 --> 00:41:40.389
your partner does that is incredible as a parent that
1059
00:41:40.429 --> 00:41:42.340
makes you go, I'm so lucky to be with this
1060
00:41:42.380 --> 00:41:44.639
person as a parent? And one thing that they do
1061
00:41:44.679 --> 00:41:46.619
that annoys you, but you've never brought up.
1062
00:41:47.019 --> 00:41:47.699
As a parent?
1063
00:41:47.840 --> 00:41:49.659
As a parent. Well, you could go wherever you want
1064
00:41:49.679 --> 00:41:50.360
with it, Peter.
1065
00:41:50.559 --> 00:41:52.280
You can do a full personality attack if you want.
1066
00:41:52.360 --> 00:41:55.809
All right, let's go. Let's go. I've needed this therapy
1067
00:41:55.849 --> 00:41:56.650
session for a while.
1068
00:41:56.909 --> 00:41:58.190
Get it off your chest, Peter.
1069
00:41:58.909 --> 00:42:01.570
The thing that she does that makes me just melt is,
1070
00:42:02.170 --> 00:42:05.269
you know, she's a full-time doctor and she works and
1071
00:42:05.289 --> 00:42:08.389
she does all that. But like a lot of parents,
1072
00:42:08.769 --> 00:42:13.369
she puts her kids first. But to the point that she...
1073
00:42:13.579 --> 00:42:16.840
jeopardizes herself a lot of times so in in the
1074
00:42:16.909 --> 00:42:21.070
sense of how do i explain this i've seen people
1075
00:42:21.110 --> 00:42:23.869
put their kids first but the way she does it
1076
00:42:25.130 --> 00:42:28.230
is just i don't know it makes my heart melt
1077
00:42:28.269 --> 00:42:31.289
i've never seen anyone be so selfless when it comes
1078
00:42:31.309 --> 00:42:33.409
to the kids and i'm sure most people say that
1079
00:42:33.449 --> 00:42:34.690
about their wives but.
1080
00:42:34.530 --> 00:42:36.050
Yeah no i wouldn't i wouldn't.
1081
00:42:37.360 --> 00:42:41.159
Joking i wouldn't say about josh's wife even i'm.
1082
00:42:41.039 --> 00:42:44.599
Joking rose i'm joking Now let's go to the thing.
1083
00:42:44.800 --> 00:42:45.559
The juicy bit.
1084
00:42:45.619 --> 00:42:50.960
This thermostat thing, it does my head in. It does
1085
00:42:51.139 --> 00:42:55.340
my head in. My parents are from Cyprus. I've lived
1086
00:42:55.389 --> 00:42:59.929
in Australia. I'm used to warmth. He wants it to
1087
00:42:59.989 --> 00:43:03.449
be the Arctic all times of the year in our house, right?
1088
00:43:04.050 --> 00:43:06.019
I walk up. I think if I turn the heat up,
1089
00:43:06.030 --> 00:43:08.489
she's not going to know. By the time it gets hot,
1090
00:43:09.010 --> 00:43:11.510
She can turn it down because everything can start cooling
1091
00:43:11.550 --> 00:43:13.380
down and it's going to take a process. And by
1092
00:43:13.420 --> 00:43:15.260
the time she thinks it's down, I'll turn it back
1093
00:43:15.320 --> 00:43:17.559
on again. And so we go. We've got a nice
1094
00:43:17.639 --> 00:43:19.480
balance in the house. Oh, mate.
1095
00:43:19.579 --> 00:43:20.199
It's too cold.
1096
00:43:20.340 --> 00:43:23.320
It's not just cold. Put it this way. I said
1097
00:43:23.380 --> 00:43:26.639
to her the other day, the 1st of April happened
1098
00:43:26.820 --> 00:43:30.599
and it was pouring with rain. And I went, great. Spring,
1099
00:43:31.159 --> 00:43:33.500
I said, and it's raining. And she went, oh, no.
1100
00:43:33.559 --> 00:43:36.409
This is how positive she is. Oh, no. She said,
1101
00:43:36.449 --> 00:43:40.050
it's a thing. It's called April showers. As if the
1102
00:43:40.110 --> 00:43:41.989
rest of the months have not rained and all of
1103
00:43:42.030 --> 00:43:46.230
a sudden we've got April and it's raining. And I went, oh, wow, great.
1104
00:43:46.309 --> 00:43:48.050
So we're going to have a cold, rainy month. Great.
1105
00:43:48.070 --> 00:43:49.360
I'm looking forward to that. I haven't had one of
1106
00:43:49.400 --> 00:43:52.539
those for a while. What I'm saying is she doesn't
1107
00:43:52.619 --> 00:43:53.880
feel the cold at all.
1108
00:43:53.940 --> 00:43:54.920
She's like me.
1109
00:43:55.260 --> 00:43:58.090
And I need the heat. So this is the only thing,
1110
00:43:58.130 --> 00:44:00.349
but I'm sure she'll say exactly the same thing.
1111
00:44:00.710 --> 00:44:02.719
About you, but switching around is too hot.
1112
00:44:02.809 --> 00:44:04.550
I reckon that's a small price to pay.
1113
00:44:04.670 --> 00:44:06.150
Yeah, but I love it too much to go.
1114
00:44:06.309 --> 00:44:08.260
But she's in the right, I think, on this one.
1115
00:44:08.360 --> 00:44:11.679
But good luck with your book, Peter. Super Space Kids
1116
00:44:12.159 --> 00:44:16.320
Save Planet Drizzle Bottom. It's out now for ages three plus.
1117
00:44:16.530 --> 00:44:18.530
Lou will be buying it, Rob. Lou will buy a
1118
00:44:18.690 --> 00:44:19.809
copy straight away.
1119
00:44:19.969 --> 00:44:21.730
Yeah, she loves it. I'll have to get it signed
1120
00:44:21.789 --> 00:44:22.349
next time I see her.
1121
00:44:22.429 --> 00:44:24.710
Just tell Lou if she can get me my trousers back, please,
1122
00:44:24.769 --> 00:44:26.469
because they're back in fashion now.
1123
00:44:26.750 --> 00:44:28.380
Yeah, can you do me a favour? You can say,
1124
00:44:28.510 --> 00:44:32.190
Louise Watts, I remember you from Fairfield Halls, and I
1125
00:44:32.230 --> 00:44:34.550
love you. For me now, Peter, and chuck and play
1126
00:44:34.570 --> 00:44:34.889
it to her.
1127
00:44:35.090 --> 00:44:38.739
Louise, it's Peter. I remember you from Fairfield Hall. Do
1128
00:44:38.760 --> 00:44:41.199
you know what? I've only ever done that once, if
1129
00:44:41.280 --> 00:44:44.340
I remember ever, and I remember that night so well. So,
1130
00:44:44.940 --> 00:44:51.880
you know, I mean, you ended up marrying Rob. LAUGHTER Cheers, mate.
1131
00:44:52.000 --> 00:44:52.559
Thanks, mate.
1132
00:44:52.659 --> 00:44:55.389
Surely it wasn't that great a performance after all. Right, fine.
1133
00:44:55.429 --> 00:44:55.909
Thanks for that.
1134
00:44:55.969 --> 00:44:59.530
No, well, you were her crush and she went from
1135
00:44:59.690 --> 00:45:03.480
Greek God to this little blonde mess. So something went
1136
00:45:03.519 --> 00:45:04.079
wrong somewhere.
1137
00:45:04.119 --> 00:45:05.239
To an English gentleman.
1138
00:45:05.440 --> 00:45:06.380
To an English gentleman.
1139
00:45:06.440 --> 00:45:06.840
Exactly.
1140
00:45:07.119 --> 00:45:07.579
Cheers, mate.
1141
00:45:10.070 --> 00:45:11.570
Peter Andre, where have you got to go now, Rob?
1142
00:45:11.949 --> 00:45:13.360
I've got to get a train back to London to
1143
00:45:13.380 --> 00:45:15.039
go and see my wife to talk to her about
1144
00:45:15.119 --> 00:45:19.119
ripping Peter Andre's trousers off at Fairfield Halls, the dutty woman.
1145
00:45:19.719 --> 00:45:21.949
You've got 23 minutes to your train. Get out of
1146
00:45:21.989 --> 00:45:23.090
your effing hotel.
1147
00:45:23.309 --> 00:45:23.510
Bye.
1148
00:45:23.610 --> 00:45:24.489
See you on Tuesday.
1149
00:45:24.510 --> 00:45:24.630
Bye.
1150
00:45:24.650 --> 00:45:24.750
Bye.
1151
00:45:24.769 --> 00:45:25.190
Bye. Bye. Bye.