Kendra Blake: Alright, welcome Gea. It's so, so, so wonderful having you with me today recording for my Momma Thrive podcast. Welcome and thank you for joining me.
Gea: Thank you so much for inviting me. It's such a joy to be here.
Kendra Blake: Well, I'm going to start off as I always do, which is just to ask you to share a little bit about your journey into your work and especially how your own personal experience with embodiment and motherhood has shaped your understanding of, I suppose, somatic presence, your yoga work, the way that you hold space for women and mothers in particular.
Gea: Yes. Well, my journey with prenatal and postnatal ⁓ kind of spaces that I'm holding started about 10 years ago when I enrolled in my first kind of prenatal education ⁓ training. I finished my prenatal yoga course then. And since I was already offering, I was running a studio back then, back at home in Croatia. And there was nothing in terms of prenatal yoga classes or space where mothers can be held. So I started running my classes there. And that's kind of the entry point for my ⁓ prenatal and postnatal offerings. Ever since then, I've been continually holding spaces for mothers. ⁓ Eventually, I went on to study with some midwives, some... Kinesio therapist, ⁓ I enrolled in Doula trainings, I'm a full spectrum Doula, and I'm continuing in this path. And now today I'm offering also prenatal and postnatal yoga teacher trainings and birth partners workshops besides my everyday work with mothers, but I'm continually involved in this sphere. And personally, I'm a mother. ⁓ My son is five years old now. And... ⁓ I gave birth in the UK, I have no support system here. And the culture that I'm brought in also, we've never seen nannies or any kind of non-family ⁓ support in terms of helping you take care of your children or someone helping take care of yourself as a mother or of your household. If it's not your mother or someone in your family, you don't really pay people to do that. ⁓ And I gave birth during the lockdown. So that itself was quite isolating. I didn't have an opportunity to meet anyone who was in the same boat as I was. And out of that, I think as mothers, we have this creative pulse. ⁓ I found my way to find my network. I was doing ⁓ online prenatal classes. I had like 50 mothers doing yoga with me online. So I did find my ways. ⁓ But there was a lack of space where I could just arrive and not necessarily do something, but just have a place where I can land. ⁓ I think that's what I've been doing mostly in my studio here in Wandsworth. since then.
Kendra Blake: You've got such an array of skills to you and so much that allows for this encompassment of, I suppose, a holistic holding of mothers. And you've said something so beautiful there, Gea, about this idea that actually sometimes we just need a safe space to be in. don't necessarily need more skills or more trainings or more to do. We just need to be I suppose ⁓ part of I'm curious around is suppose a lot of us mums instinctively know that something is happening with us, in our bodies, in our sense of identity, we have children, when we become mothers, but we don't always have a language for it. Based on what you've just shared, how do you help them name what's actually happening to them in their worlds, and how do you support them subsequent to that?
Gea: Mm-hmm. I have a very ⁓ complex relationship with how ⁓ prenatal and postnatal support courses, classes are offered in the modern world. I find that the majority of them come with the storyline and with the idea that us as mothers need a specialist to understand how to be pregnant, how to give birth, how to raise our children, ⁓ which I think is inherently wrong. So I try to step away from that in my containers that I hold. ⁓ The majority of my work is like what underlies all my offerings is this idea of motivating them to use their autonomy because I can't give it to them, right? Nobody can give you your autonomy. You have it. You will either use it or you won't use it. So I have a feeling that ⁓ Yes, we do some yoga. We do like good deep core stuff. But I think the majority of my kind of purpose here is to give them spaces to tell me no, to give them spaces to choose a different path than what I'm offering, to give them space to not call a birth natural, you know, in this way or the other way. ⁓ I give them the space to feel ⁓ heard and seen. I don't question their choices as a mother. And I try to honor and value them. And I think when we approach holding spaces in this way, there is like this whole performative aspect of motherhood can kind of drop away. Nobody needs to be the perfect mother here. And yeah. I think that's kind of the main, main thing about it.
Kendra Blake: It's beautiful. I love that because there I think you're speaking both as a mother care practitioner, so somebody who actively creates safe spaces through your work ultimately for mothers to land in. But I think you're also speaking about having had the lived experience of being a mother and needing to not feel like you have to perform in order to belong in a space. I right, Gea? Is that true?
Gea: Yeah. Yes, absolutely. ⁓ very, ⁓ I set very high standards for myself personally. And, ⁓ you know, I was always not on time, but like 10 minutes early or, you know, everything is done perfectly. Yeah, I was here 10 minutes early. But motherhood kind of pushed me in a place where I couldn't be on time for anything. Like I was so behind with.
Kendra Blake: I mean, today's an example.
Gea: everything regarding work. ⁓ I felt I was behind with the way that I looked, ⁓ the way, like, the speed of my recovery, even though, like, in the, in my, like, mental mind, it's, it all makes sense. ⁓ But that sense of urgency or things to be done in a certain way, like, motherhood really pushed me in a place where I just stopped, you know, my messages went unanswered for four weeks. ⁓ And at first, there was this moment of great guilt. But then at one point, I was like, well, you know what? It looks like this is me now. And I stopped apologizing myself for it. ⁓ So I think from my lived experience, it really came to that understanding. When someone comes to me now and he's like, we all have the same 24 hours in a day, I'm like, girl, we don't.
Kendra Blake: Yeah.
Gea: And I think it's okay. ⁓ So the main shift that came from my lived experience is that I allowed myself the space to be this way, which before I didn't. Yeah.
Kendra Blake: I love that, I really, really do. I think something that's coming up for me as I'm listening to you, especially knowing your work with yoga and somatics and movement, I mean, that feels like the ultimate ⁓ landing in the philosophy of it all. Does that feel true? Does it feel like it brought home the true sense of embodiment here?
Gea: Thank In a way, it did, and in a way, it didn't. It's always interesting. So my doula teacher, Anita, she's a great woman. She's like a head of doula association, big in European Union for this. But first, when I invited her to be a guest teacher in my teacher training, she was like, I'm not sure this is a good idea. And I was like, what do mean? And she's like, I don't really have a good experience with. like yoga teachers giving birth, you know? So it was an interesting conversation, and it made me question a lot of things. She was like, it's supposed to be this great embodiment where we also are so in tune with our bodies and able to soften and release. But I often find that the way we practice yoga and this good understanding of the physical body also brings, ⁓ oftentimes with itself, this great urgency to control. ⁓ Or like, I know my body, you know, of course I'll give birth, like I breathe so well. So I have a feeling that the experienced physical practitioners, ⁓ from that attunement to their body, ⁓ can also go to the road where they feel like they have control, while like birth is everything but control, right? So I think that in a way it's a yes and it's a no. those who are able to understand their body but in a way of like walking with it and those who manage to switch off the thinking mind then yes we are talking about this great embodiment that serves well in this big transformation but it can also be something that is actually standing like right there in your way like a biggest obstacle to to go over on this journey.
Kendra Blake: Fascinating, I love that. I mean, you've named the duality there that is ultimately motherhood in itself too, which is this real push and pull between what we know to be true, our thinking mind, and what we can feel in our body instinctively. And I suppose that in as a way, I wonder, I'm almost putting some threads here, Gea, so let me know if I'm overstepping in any way or form.
Gea: Yeah. Yes, yes, go go.
Kendra Blake: I wonder if in a way that has informed the way that you've created the space holding from others so that they can lean more instinctively into what their bodies are saying to them so that they can have a little bit more agency because you've taken this duality that can be there when we get caught up in that performance piece, the thinking piece, the needing to be in control and you've gone, oh, hold on a second, what spaces need to be cultivated in order for somebody to feel safe enough to be in their bodies to be... an agency of themselves to be able to practice saying they knows. I don't know if that makes any sense, but that was kind of what was coming up for me as I was hearing you.
Gea: then. Yes, it does. And ⁓ I actually find that this insight that I got from motherhood and working in spaces where mothers kind of come together, I also took it in all my other aspects of my work and my offerings. ⁓ And I think there are plenty of layers through which we can work as ⁓ practitioners who are holding space for others. And it goes way beyond. who couldn't have use of having autonomy very active over their bodies, over their minds, over what they do over their life. So I do take it elsewhere. And I find there are different gateways to it. I think language is very powerful. I never come to a space kind of grading experiences. I often find that, I mean, like in the modern world right now, there is also a high rise of very pro natural things, like however, you know, we will think about it, like no medicine, doctors are this and that, you don't wanna go to the hospital, you want whatever. ⁓ I never hold a space with putting my personal agenda on it in a way. I'm like, this is here, this is there, what is right for you? And ⁓ the language here can... be used to shape the spaces in this way. ⁓ Then the way that I offer things, there is a sequence, but you can do it in this way. You can do it in that way. This is one variation. This is another. It's not that this one is easier. This is harder. Or this is more advanced. This is less advanced. If you're very embodied, choose this one. ⁓ It's more like the things are out here. What really works for you? Not for me, not for whoever.
Kendra Blake: laughs
Gea: And I think no matter how, as a practitioner who holds space, you set up the room, I never put myself there as like a guru or like, I'm the person who you should follow, you know? ⁓ It's more like I'm here. You know, this is exactly the same as you. I do all the same mistakes. I go through life exactly like you do, trying to figure it out. But no matter how you put yourself out there, as the moment you're kind of in front of them, You know, they do see you as authority and they won't and that the relationship with the authority is often so complex. And ⁓ I find that by breaking down these barriers and trying to just show myself as very humane helps to avoid that. Does that answer your question?
Kendra Blake: Do you know what I think that? Yeah, yeah, I think that theme there around honoring our humanity as women who support mothers is such a key piece because I suppose it offers an opportunity for the women that are with us to feel safe enough to bring themselves to a space. That authenticity piece is really powerful. Yeah, it really is. Do you feel
Gea: Yeah. I know.
Kendra Blake: Well, I suppose I'm curious. How do you think your experience of becoming a mother has shaped that? You named earlier that, I suppose, you went from this, and I suppose it's still part of you, more controlled, a personality type, fairly perfectionistic, performance driven, and then motherhood unrattled that. Do you feel like you've been able to allow yourself to show up?
Gea: Thank you.
Kendra Blake: both in the messy middle of things as well as already driven and ambitious women that you can be both and in more spaces and by virtue of that, yeah, the women around you can too.
Gea: ⁓ yes, absolutely. ⁓ yes. I just think that I personally find when someone shapes a picture of me that's way beyond what I am, just puts so much pressure on my life. Like, don't want, you know, there's so much happening that just by living up to your standards is another task for me, right? And I don't find it useful. So I do try to be very honest and real in my offerings. And I... And I really like, like aside from the space holder and the teacher, my yoga teachers and my yoga philosophy teachers, they always say that, ⁓ you know, if your spiritual life, if your spiritual practice, if your, if the life that you live, if the choices that you make. pull you away ⁓ from the life that you are living, like right here. You know, I'm here in London, it's busy, it's crazy. I'm running a business. If I have to run a business, I can't run this business by, you know, lying down in Bali for seven months. You know, this is not the reality of it. Or if your practice or your life puts you in a place where you feel like you're above others, where you feel like you're better, more enlightened, awakened, you know, ⁓ maybe there is something wrong with your practice. ⁓
Kendra Blake: Hehehehe.
Gea: The good path should always bring you in more intimacy with the reality of life rather than take you away from it, you know, so I feel that ⁓ to step into my shoes is to play the cards that have been given and to play them in a way that is relevant in my living experience not, you know, somewhere else where life is peaceful and there are no distractions, you know, sometimes I have like ⁓ top dancers underneath my class, studio below. And we are meditating. Yeah. If you can't meditate with the top dancers below you, good luck walking out there. ⁓
Kendra Blake: Wow, I mean, it feels really profound and also synchronistic because we just had, I don't know if you heard it earlier, Gea, somebody sawing outside the window. was like, ⁓ that is just perfectly timed to bring into a podcast episode. And you know what, there's something really profound about that because
Gea: Yeah. I didn't really mind it.
Kendra Blake: I think we're so often trying to seek something different to what we're currently living that we lose out on the true essence of presence, which again, ironically, so many mums that I work with feel so heartbroken around, which is how can I be more present to what I'm seeing and witnessing in front of me right now? But what you've just named is the very act of...
Gea: Hmm.
Kendra Blake: Trying to make your presence a different presence to how you are doesn't allow you to be present to what you're witnessing as a mother. That's profound.
Gea: I'm Yes, and I have an interesting story on that. ⁓ Because I also don't feel... I have a feeling that oftentimes like today, life is really busy, we should all do a lot of meditation and restorative yoga. And I'm like, yeah, great, know, this is epic. But we can also do the other stuff. It's not like ⁓ you have to just go complete opposite or... I often also find that there is like a one way.
Kendra Blake: Mmm.
Gea: offered as being these peaceful humans. There are plenty of gateways. And I find that doing things that you love, even if there is a lot of them, is not a problem. It was never a problem for me to do the things that were rooted in my purpose, no matter how tough life was around me. And even in the midst of early postpartum, everyone was like, you're not supposed to go back to work like this. And I was like, Please just stop, you know? Like from midnight to midnight is what my day is happening in, you know? I have zero support. I have nobody to come to cook for me. I have nobody to clean my house. I have nobody to come and help me out with the baby. Like I'm all there by myself while my husband is working because someone needs to also provide for us while I'm not working, right? And then giving my son. to my husband when he would come back home, locking the door of a room, turning on Zoom to teach an hour. That was a blessing. That was my sanctuary. Work was the only thing that kept me sane at that moment. It was my own little sanctuary, even though I was holding also space for others. But I was also, in a way, holding the space for myself. And I found that plenty of things that I, like just the way that I became a yoga teacher. I was studying mathematics and computer science. I was on Friday and Saturdays. I would work from 6 PM to 7 in the morning in a nightclub because I had to pay for whatever, my trainings, my going out and everything. So I finished my teacher training by finishing work 7 in the morning, showing up at 9 AM. Finish teacher training, go back to work. 7 AM, sleep for an hour, go to teacher training. Comes Monday, eight to eight lectures at the university. It was never a problem. I don't say that this is the best way to do things. I would probably choose different pathways right now. But it's just that I don't find that being busy is a problem. I think being busy with things that drain you is a problem. Living your purpose. rarely feels ⁓ heavy. And then it gets a little heavy, but from there you regulate until you find your perfect measure. Yeah.
Kendra Blake: I'm sitting there and I'm just kind of imagining this younger version of you Gea ⁓ ⁓ you've navigated and how you learned here and I suppose part of me is thinking a little bit ⁓
Gea: ⁓ my god, I was young. Don't... That wouldn't happen right now. Yeah.
Kendra Blake: It's interesting. I'm thinking a little bit about this perfect mother myth that so many of us mothers aspire to. So this image of how we should be as a mum and I'm reconciling this image of like the perfect yoga teacher with the version that you've just explained to me. I'm going, how ironic isn't it that I would see you as the embodiment of yoga, just a yoga philosophy by the way that you're speaking, but it's not.
Gea: on it. Yeah. Hahaha
Kendra Blake: not the stereotype or this idealized, romanticized version of it, it's the true, authentic version of it. There's so much more warmth I have in my heart for that. I think there's something really, what's the word that I'm looking for, enlivening about being able to be with somebody in their full truth, the messy version of it, as opposed to this polished, pristine, pedestal version of it.
Gea: No. Yes. Definitely not Polish. Yeah. But motherhood did help me.
Kendra Blake: both in motherhood or in your work or role. Like, I just love that. that.
Gea: did help me. ⁓ You know, it's also easy with the personality that I am to never feel like you've done enough. In motherhood, what was interesting is I was waiting for my perfect moment. I wouldn't step on my mat because if it's not a 75 minute practice, are you even living? So I ended up not practicing for months. And I was like, what the heck? This is not working. So what motherhood did is a. It pushed me into finding realistic expectations of myself. So I started small. I was like, OK, if I wait for my 75 minutes, it's never going to happen. he does sleep for 10 minutes every now and then. So I was like, maybe if I have my mat rolled out all the time, maybe I can do something for 10 minutes. And uh. That was beautiful because it brought me back in connection to myself, showing me also that we don't need big things as mothers. I find that sometimes when someone wants to help me, they're like, ⁓ yeah, leave your kids with me and go away for two weeks. And I'm like, I don't really need this type of help. I need you to give me 30 minutes. So I found that what motherhood gave me is to understand that ⁓ Little things are really big things, I can live my life, and I love my life as it is. I just need a little break. And in that little break, I did learn how to restore myself a lot quicker than, you know. When I was younger, I had a feeling like I always need a lot of, you know, you need a lot of rest, a lot of vacation, a lot of everything, which is great if you can afford it ⁓ in the shape of your life. Today I'm learning that I don't need big things to be well. I need just small things regularly. Yeah.
Kendra Blake: So maybe I'm going to banjee off of that into how you sustain your work practice gear, especially by virtue of the fact that you are a working mum, as well as holding space for so, many. How do you keep this work sustainable? How do you resource and make sure that you've got a level of resilience to continue to offer the space from a cup that is at least full if not overflowing?
Gea: Mm. ⁓ I think it definitely helps that by doing this work I am absolutely sure that I'm walking in my ⁓ purpose. ⁓ If it wasn't like that, it would feel like it would be heavy, you know. So ⁓ working more, doing more was never a problem or issue for me. I think the challenge that I met was thinking that people who I work with can't meet me there. They can't meet my standard. They can't meet my pace. ⁓ Sometimes I would try to work with someone, and I would be like, ⁓ my god, I would be done with this like seven hours ago, ⁓ which made it very easy for me to do everything. ⁓ I would just take something, learn it, and do it myself. So I did my website. I did my accounting. I did my social media. I did my marketing, because that's how it goes when you're a sole trader. So I think the greatest challenge was to stand in a place where I can trust that people around me can actually help me. And it took a trial and error until I found people who work with me well. But that delegation of work was, I think, one of the greatest learning curves. So it's possible now only because I have people who I trust who can help me. ⁓ If it wasn't for them, I couldn't do it on my own. And oftentimes people think, ⁓ you do all of this alone. I'm like, not anymore. I used to be this person. But ⁓ now I accept helping hands.
Kendra Blake: It's interesting, isn't it? Because you've created such a beautiful community where people have connected in community with others. And what you've just named is that what has made your business more sustainable and possibly even thriving is community. The irony of it, isn't it? And being open to...
Gea: you
Kendra Blake: stepping out of needing to be the kind of perfect sole trader, the perfect entrepreneur, doing it all by yourself and going, actually, I can do this with support from others. And I think that's eye-opening.
Gea: And I also think it's very logical when you think of the definition of community. You community was never meant to be the space where one person does everything and others just come to visit. That's not the definition of community. In community, everyone has a role to play, doesn't it? That's why it works, because people have their obligations. They have their. ⁓ responsibilities. If it's not like that, it's not a community really. So I think that was a big learning curve. I was trying to build a community while myself doing everything and that never works because it's not a community then. Then it's like a following. But if you distribute the load and everyone takes their own responsibility, then we are talking about community.
Kendra Blake: Yeah. Yeah. wonder if in a way it has followed your own motherhood journey to gear and being able to build community around yourself. mean, you said as much at the beginning of our call conversation together, which is you stepped into your own creative way of building almost a village around yourself. And it would not have been the conventional village if you had been at home where you had your family structure, for example, but you've created community around you and your business ownership. capacity, but possibly also in the same breath in your own motherhood journey too, likewise. Does that feel true?
Gea: Yes, and I find that it's very realistic with the journey into mattresses. I don't know if you felt that when you entered motherhood, but I really find this, and it happened to me plenty of times since I became a mother. But also, I witnessed that with a lot of women who I work with. ⁓ almost as if motherhood stretches you to a point and kind of stands heavy on you to the point where you feel like you can't hold anything. Like how can I possibly hold anything more than this? Like how can a human hold anything more than this? ⁓ And it almost then feels as if you kind of fall into like a big dark pit. And all of a sudden, the space that you can hold things for expands exponentially. And every now and then in motherhood, I have met that wall when I felt like I can't do this anymore. And ⁓ only motherhood gave me that expansion that I also don't really know how to explain. I don't know how to explain to someone that I was running on no sleep for. I don't know how many long. I should have ended in a psychiatry in other containers, right? But all of a sudden, it's almost as if, I don't know, there is some strength that comes from I don't know where. And all of a sudden, I was able to hold a lot more space. Yeah. Yeah.
Kendra Blake: Yeah. Yeah, yeah. I speak about that as meeting our edges and I suppose you've named it earlier this idea of surrender, this softening that needs to occur when we do meet those edges because we can step forward with this real desire to control or grasp or figure things out, fix it, but if you almost surrender into it, that softening allows that expansiveness to occur, or at least that's been my experience.
Gea: Mm-hmm. . Yes. Yeah.
Kendra Blake: It's interesting that you bring that around the matresson's journey, so the motherhood journey. I have found that in birthing my business, I've also had the same experience where I've met my edges with it and I've been, ⁓ well, I can't grow any further. And then it's been a surrender to the process and a softening into it where suddenly that sense of purpose has re-emerged. And I felt more aligned with what I'm bringing out there into the world and how I'm working.
Gea: Yeah.
Kendra Blake: and I've met souls that have been able to rally around me and go, yes, this is needed and it's important. And I think the same experience has been very true in my own motherhood journey.
Gea: I Yeah, my teacher always used to say that pregnancy stretches you to your edge. ⁓ Birth breaks you in a way. Not like that there is anything wrong with your body after, but in terms of your understanding of yourself, it can often also break you. But then the postpartum gives this big pit from which you dig your way out. to rebuild yourself and ⁓ to kind of, the breaking is more like a metaphor for rearranging your pieces in a way that is more aligned with yourself once you go through something like that. And I find that what you talk about, the meeting your edges, I can relate that to those moments when there is a decision to be made of how am I going forward from here. And with every decision like that, almost always felt like I'm coming closer to myself. ⁓ that's also, when we run businesses like this, I also feel it's really difficult to separate it from your own personal kind of journey. It's not like I come here and talk about my personal life. It's more the. The challenges that I meet will always be reflected in the business that I run to. And the way that I respond to my life is also going to be the way that I respond to challenges while running a business, in the same way that a woman who has her patterns in decision making or relationship to pain are going to be the exact same patterns that she makes when she is in labor. So in a way,
Kendra Blake: Mm.
Gea: My teacher always also say the way that you do one thing is the way that you do everything. In a way, this is who I am. Yeah. Yeah.
Kendra Blake: So interesting, isn't it? I was reflecting as you're speaking about as an occupational therapist, one of our models is this doing being becoming model. And it's really indicative of what you've just named. And I genuinely feel that motherhood is this ultimate, mean, life, to be fair, is this ultimate journey of becoming, but there's something really quite
Gea: I love it.
Kendra Blake: incredible about the becoming that occurs when you step into motherhood. I think especially as a mother care practitioner, somebody who holds space for women and the more kind of feminine energy, motherhood in its essence is the ultimate of that, isn't it? There's this real sense of just embodiment and becoming if you allow yourself to be in that space. And I agree. I mean, if I even reflect on my own birth process and pregnancy and
Gea: home. Yeah.
Kendra Blake: subsequent postpartum, I'm now 18 months with my youngest. There's a real kind of landing of the pieces back together, but then also this shattering open again and a landing back together and this constant becoming and evolution of self. And it's been very reflective in my own workspace too. Our patterns are our patterns, Gea, you're so right.
Gea: haha Morning. Yeah. Yeah, but I also see it, you know, I understand what you say and I do feel that. ⁓ I also love to for myself to frame it ⁓ more as a return, you know, ⁓ the becoming can also sound as if ⁓ you're not already there, you know, like you're not, it feels like you're reaching for something that is not already there. Well, I always found that ⁓
Kendra Blake: you
Gea: That process of discovery more felt like it was returning me back to my essence rather than, ⁓ you know, yes, reshaping it, but maybe more aligning it with who I really was, but maybe was too young or too scared to say it, be it. ⁓ So, yeah, I also see it as a great return.
Kendra Blake: getting emotional as you name it. Ridiculous. Yeah. I so resonate. Yeah, that's beautiful. Mm Yeah, that returning to self. mean, like genuinely, I've got this well of emotion that I'm trying to keep at bay because otherwise I'll just be a tearful emotional mess because there's something really beautiful about that sense of returning. And and
Gea: Yeah. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
Kendra Blake: Yeah, completely have lost my words around it actually.
Gea: But I also think that both have values. Not every word is ready to come out at all times. And I think there is also great value in ⁓ giving ourselves the space and time for things to unfold as we are ready. ⁓ I often find also that there is a... This idea of urgency with everything and almost as if with that too or like a spiritual journey or everything like there is this urgency to be you know more enlightened, more awakened, more in contact with ourselves and I'm like we have a whole life for it you know. There's no rush. Imagine how boring would it be for us to be enlightened now and then have you know this is it.
Kendra Blake: Yeah.
Gea: What do we do for the next 70 years? It's okay for things to go slowly.
Kendra Blake: Yeah, yeah, it's the process, isn't it? Yeah, so, so true. Yeah, so maybe with that, yeah, I feel like that's a really beautiful space for us to start kind of holding the closure of our chat together. Are there any final thoughts or words of wisdom that you would like to leave with any mothers that are listening or equally any women who are running businesses in the support of mother care, those holding space for other women and mothers?
Gea: Yeah. and Yes, I witness, I work with lot of women, a lot of mothers. ⁓ I see lot of families on my weekly rotation of classes, workshops, And I do see that as a mother and as both of us working with mothers... ⁓ there comes a moment where some things just don't work anymore. ⁓ as a mother, like I've seen, as like a space holder lately, especially I've seen so many moms being made redundant, just like on their return back to work. And often all these places that feel like ⁓ they're the end of you. ⁓ I've also witnessed... so much creativity rising out of it. ⁓ And I often see that as women, when you put us in those places, we can birth things in our own way, just in the same way that we are in our blueprint have the capacity sometimes to birth babies. ⁓ So maybe just that, that in those moments when it feels like, ⁓ everything is falling apart. I always see it as this great little moment to just recollect yourself and maybe choose to do things in a different way. And the more choices we make, ⁓ just small choices to go further with what is true for us, I really witnessed ⁓ this taking us places. ⁓ I found that to be the most important thing, just to whatever you do, to do it with the whole heart. And if you can't do it with your whole heart, maybe just try to do something else. ⁓ And then when I'm rooted in that, everything finds its way, even though there are moments when I cry, thinking we're going to close tomorrow. Or how the hell am I supposed to go through this again? Or why me? ⁓ Somehow things do fall in place when there is a little trust and love in everything that we do.
Kendra Blake: ⁓ I love that, I love that. So maybe with that in mind, this will also be in the show notes for anyone listening. what do you offer? Where are you based? Can you tell us a little bit about what you have available ⁓ those that are listening?
Gea: Yes, thank you so much. I need to work more on speaking about that. ⁓ I own a yoga studio, ⁓ Soma Yoga in Wandsworth in South West London. We have a super rich prenatal and postnatal program here, aside from the whole other thing that we do. I offer prenatal and postnatal yoga classes.
Kendra Blake: Hehehehe
Gea: I offer birth partners workshops, ⁓ which are like a total highlight ⁓ here in the studio and partners rave about them. It's one of my favorite things that I do. ⁓ And in the scope of this work, I also offer prenatal and postnatal yoga teacher trainings ⁓ that I host in person here at Soma, but also I host them online on Zoom and... ⁓ Yeah, there are plenty of teachers around the world doing this training and this feels very powerful, you know. I kind of educate the teachers to do this work and now these communities are built, you know, in Europe, in Australia, in Saudi Arabia, in the US, everywhere. So it's really inspiring to see how ⁓ with the work that we do, we can send a ripple. out there that can hold so much more people than I can do myself. And ⁓ yeah, I think that's it in the scope of the pregnancy and postpartum bubble. Apart from that, I host an online platform. It's called the Online Yoga Club. It's really cool. And I host retreats, other teacher trainings.
Kendra Blake: That's all.
Gea: Yeah, different things out there. But this is kind of more related to the topics we covered.
Kendra Blake: They'll all be linked in the show notes for anyone interested. The online yoga club is fantastic. There's so much depth to it for anybody who can't make their way in person to the studio. Thank you, Gea. It's been so, so wonderful getting to chat to you. Thank you for making the time. I really appreciate your wisdom and probably could chat the whole day with you to be honest. We could. Thank you so much.
Gea: We can do that too. Thank you so much. I really enjoyed this and I love your work. And ⁓ you know that I do. I've invited Kendra quite a while ago to host Mother's Circles in my studio. And ⁓ yeah, I really appreciate all the knowledge you share around this. Thank you.
Gea: Thank you so much for inviting me. It's such a joy to be here.
Kendra Blake: Well, I'm going to start off as I always do, which is just to ask you to share a little bit about your journey into your work and especially how your own personal experience with embodiment and motherhood has shaped your understanding of, I suppose, somatic presence, your yoga work, the way that you hold space for women and mothers in particular.
Gea: Yes. Well, my journey with prenatal and postnatal ⁓ kind of spaces that I'm holding started about 10 years ago when I enrolled in my first kind of prenatal education ⁓ training. I finished my prenatal yoga course then. And since I was already offering, I was running a studio back then, back at home in Croatia. And there was nothing in terms of prenatal yoga classes or space where mothers can be held. So I started running my classes there. And that's kind of the entry point for my ⁓ prenatal and postnatal offerings. Ever since then, I've been continually holding spaces for mothers. ⁓ Eventually, I went on to study with some midwives, some... Kinesio therapist, ⁓ I enrolled in Doula trainings, I'm a full spectrum Doula, and I'm continuing in this path. And now today I'm offering also prenatal and postnatal yoga teacher trainings and birth partners workshops besides my everyday work with mothers, but I'm continually involved in this sphere. And personally, I'm a mother. ⁓ My son is five years old now. And... ⁓ I gave birth in the UK, I have no support system here. And the culture that I'm brought in also, we've never seen nannies or any kind of non-family ⁓ support in terms of helping you take care of your children or someone helping take care of yourself as a mother or of your household. If it's not your mother or someone in your family, you don't really pay people to do that. ⁓ And I gave birth during the lockdown. So that itself was quite isolating. I didn't have an opportunity to meet anyone who was in the same boat as I was. And out of that, I think as mothers, we have this creative pulse. ⁓ I found my way to find my network. I was doing ⁓ online prenatal classes. I had like 50 mothers doing yoga with me online. So I did find my ways. ⁓ But there was a lack of space where I could just arrive and not necessarily do something, but just have a place where I can land. ⁓ I think that's what I've been doing mostly in my studio here in Wandsworth. since then.
Kendra Blake: You've got such an array of skills to you and so much that allows for this encompassment of, I suppose, a holistic holding of mothers. And you've said something so beautiful there, Gea, about this idea that actually sometimes we just need a safe space to be in. don't necessarily need more skills or more trainings or more to do. We just need to be I suppose ⁓ part of I'm curious around is suppose a lot of us mums instinctively know that something is happening with us, in our bodies, in our sense of identity, we have children, when we become mothers, but we don't always have a language for it. Based on what you've just shared, how do you help them name what's actually happening to them in their worlds, and how do you support them subsequent to that?
Gea: Mm-hmm. I have a very ⁓ complex relationship with how ⁓ prenatal and postnatal support courses, classes are offered in the modern world. I find that the majority of them come with the storyline and with the idea that us as mothers need a specialist to understand how to be pregnant, how to give birth, how to raise our children, ⁓ which I think is inherently wrong. So I try to step away from that in my containers that I hold. ⁓ The majority of my work is like what underlies all my offerings is this idea of motivating them to use their autonomy because I can't give it to them, right? Nobody can give you your autonomy. You have it. You will either use it or you won't use it. So I have a feeling that ⁓ Yes, we do some yoga. We do like good deep core stuff. But I think the majority of my kind of purpose here is to give them spaces to tell me no, to give them spaces to choose a different path than what I'm offering, to give them space to not call a birth natural, you know, in this way or the other way. ⁓ I give them the space to feel ⁓ heard and seen. I don't question their choices as a mother. And I try to honor and value them. And I think when we approach holding spaces in this way, there is like this whole performative aspect of motherhood can kind of drop away. Nobody needs to be the perfect mother here. And yeah. I think that's kind of the main, main thing about it.
Kendra Blake: It's beautiful. I love that because there I think you're speaking both as a mother care practitioner, so somebody who actively creates safe spaces through your work ultimately for mothers to land in. But I think you're also speaking about having had the lived experience of being a mother and needing to not feel like you have to perform in order to belong in a space. I right, Gea? Is that true?
Gea: Yeah. Yes, absolutely. ⁓ very, ⁓ I set very high standards for myself personally. And, ⁓ you know, I was always not on time, but like 10 minutes early or, you know, everything is done perfectly. Yeah, I was here 10 minutes early. But motherhood kind of pushed me in a place where I couldn't be on time for anything. Like I was so behind with.
Kendra Blake: I mean, today's an example.
Gea: everything regarding work. ⁓ I felt I was behind with the way that I looked, ⁓ the way, like, the speed of my recovery, even though, like, in the, in my, like, mental mind, it's, it all makes sense. ⁓ But that sense of urgency or things to be done in a certain way, like, motherhood really pushed me in a place where I just stopped, you know, my messages went unanswered for four weeks. ⁓ And at first, there was this moment of great guilt. But then at one point, I was like, well, you know what? It looks like this is me now. And I stopped apologizing myself for it. ⁓ So I think from my lived experience, it really came to that understanding. When someone comes to me now and he's like, we all have the same 24 hours in a day, I'm like, girl, we don't.
Kendra Blake: Yeah.
Gea: And I think it's okay. ⁓ So the main shift that came from my lived experience is that I allowed myself the space to be this way, which before I didn't. Yeah.
Kendra Blake: I love that, I really, really do. I think something that's coming up for me as I'm listening to you, especially knowing your work with yoga and somatics and movement, I mean, that feels like the ultimate ⁓ landing in the philosophy of it all. Does that feel true? Does it feel like it brought home the true sense of embodiment here?
Gea: Thank In a way, it did, and in a way, it didn't. It's always interesting. So my doula teacher, Anita, she's a great woman. She's like a head of doula association, big in European Union for this. But first, when I invited her to be a guest teacher in my teacher training, she was like, I'm not sure this is a good idea. And I was like, what do mean? And she's like, I don't really have a good experience with. like yoga teachers giving birth, you know? So it was an interesting conversation, and it made me question a lot of things. She was like, it's supposed to be this great embodiment where we also are so in tune with our bodies and able to soften and release. But I often find that the way we practice yoga and this good understanding of the physical body also brings, ⁓ oftentimes with itself, this great urgency to control. ⁓ Or like, I know my body, you know, of course I'll give birth, like I breathe so well. So I have a feeling that the experienced physical practitioners, ⁓ from that attunement to their body, ⁓ can also go to the road where they feel like they have control, while like birth is everything but control, right? So I think that in a way it's a yes and it's a no. those who are able to understand their body but in a way of like walking with it and those who manage to switch off the thinking mind then yes we are talking about this great embodiment that serves well in this big transformation but it can also be something that is actually standing like right there in your way like a biggest obstacle to to go over on this journey.
Kendra Blake: Fascinating, I love that. I mean, you've named the duality there that is ultimately motherhood in itself too, which is this real push and pull between what we know to be true, our thinking mind, and what we can feel in our body instinctively. And I suppose that in as a way, I wonder, I'm almost putting some threads here, Gea, so let me know if I'm overstepping in any way or form.
Gea: Yeah. Yes, yes, go go.
Kendra Blake: I wonder if in a way that has informed the way that you've created the space holding from others so that they can lean more instinctively into what their bodies are saying to them so that they can have a little bit more agency because you've taken this duality that can be there when we get caught up in that performance piece, the thinking piece, the needing to be in control and you've gone, oh, hold on a second, what spaces need to be cultivated in order for somebody to feel safe enough to be in their bodies to be... an agency of themselves to be able to practice saying they knows. I don't know if that makes any sense, but that was kind of what was coming up for me as I was hearing you.
Gea: then. Yes, it does. And ⁓ I actually find that this insight that I got from motherhood and working in spaces where mothers kind of come together, I also took it in all my other aspects of my work and my offerings. ⁓ And I think there are plenty of layers through which we can work as ⁓ practitioners who are holding space for others. And it goes way beyond. who couldn't have use of having autonomy very active over their bodies, over their minds, over what they do over their life. So I do take it elsewhere. And I find there are different gateways to it. I think language is very powerful. I never come to a space kind of grading experiences. I often find that, I mean, like in the modern world right now, there is also a high rise of very pro natural things, like however, you know, we will think about it, like no medicine, doctors are this and that, you don't wanna go to the hospital, you want whatever. ⁓ I never hold a space with putting my personal agenda on it in a way. I'm like, this is here, this is there, what is right for you? And ⁓ the language here can... be used to shape the spaces in this way. ⁓ Then the way that I offer things, there is a sequence, but you can do it in this way. You can do it in that way. This is one variation. This is another. It's not that this one is easier. This is harder. Or this is more advanced. This is less advanced. If you're very embodied, choose this one. ⁓ It's more like the things are out here. What really works for you? Not for me, not for whoever.
Kendra Blake: laughs
Gea: And I think no matter how, as a practitioner who holds space, you set up the room, I never put myself there as like a guru or like, I'm the person who you should follow, you know? ⁓ It's more like I'm here. You know, this is exactly the same as you. I do all the same mistakes. I go through life exactly like you do, trying to figure it out. But no matter how you put yourself out there, as the moment you're kind of in front of them, You know, they do see you as authority and they won't and that the relationship with the authority is often so complex. And ⁓ I find that by breaking down these barriers and trying to just show myself as very humane helps to avoid that. Does that answer your question?
Kendra Blake: Do you know what I think that? Yeah, yeah, I think that theme there around honoring our humanity as women who support mothers is such a key piece because I suppose it offers an opportunity for the women that are with us to feel safe enough to bring themselves to a space. That authenticity piece is really powerful. Yeah, it really is. Do you feel
Gea: Yeah. I know.
Kendra Blake: Well, I suppose I'm curious. How do you think your experience of becoming a mother has shaped that? You named earlier that, I suppose, you went from this, and I suppose it's still part of you, more controlled, a personality type, fairly perfectionistic, performance driven, and then motherhood unrattled that. Do you feel like you've been able to allow yourself to show up?
Gea: Thank you.
Kendra Blake: both in the messy middle of things as well as already driven and ambitious women that you can be both and in more spaces and by virtue of that, yeah, the women around you can too.
Gea: ⁓ yes, absolutely. ⁓ yes. I just think that I personally find when someone shapes a picture of me that's way beyond what I am, just puts so much pressure on my life. Like, don't want, you know, there's so much happening that just by living up to your standards is another task for me, right? And I don't find it useful. So I do try to be very honest and real in my offerings. And I... And I really like, like aside from the space holder and the teacher, my yoga teachers and my yoga philosophy teachers, they always say that, ⁓ you know, if your spiritual life, if your spiritual practice, if your, if the life that you live, if the choices that you make. pull you away ⁓ from the life that you are living, like right here. You know, I'm here in London, it's busy, it's crazy. I'm running a business. If I have to run a business, I can't run this business by, you know, lying down in Bali for seven months. You know, this is not the reality of it. Or if your practice or your life puts you in a place where you feel like you're above others, where you feel like you're better, more enlightened, awakened, you know, ⁓ maybe there is something wrong with your practice. ⁓
Kendra Blake: Hehehehe.
Gea: The good path should always bring you in more intimacy with the reality of life rather than take you away from it, you know, so I feel that ⁓ to step into my shoes is to play the cards that have been given and to play them in a way that is relevant in my living experience not, you know, somewhere else where life is peaceful and there are no distractions, you know, sometimes I have like ⁓ top dancers underneath my class, studio below. And we are meditating. Yeah. If you can't meditate with the top dancers below you, good luck walking out there. ⁓
Kendra Blake: Wow, I mean, it feels really profound and also synchronistic because we just had, I don't know if you heard it earlier, Gea, somebody sawing outside the window. was like, ⁓ that is just perfectly timed to bring into a podcast episode. And you know what, there's something really profound about that because
Gea: Yeah. I didn't really mind it.
Kendra Blake: I think we're so often trying to seek something different to what we're currently living that we lose out on the true essence of presence, which again, ironically, so many mums that I work with feel so heartbroken around, which is how can I be more present to what I'm seeing and witnessing in front of me right now? But what you've just named is the very act of...
Gea: Hmm.
Kendra Blake: Trying to make your presence a different presence to how you are doesn't allow you to be present to what you're witnessing as a mother. That's profound.
Gea: I'm Yes, and I have an interesting story on that. ⁓ Because I also don't feel... I have a feeling that oftentimes like today, life is really busy, we should all do a lot of meditation and restorative yoga. And I'm like, yeah, great, know, this is epic. But we can also do the other stuff. It's not like ⁓ you have to just go complete opposite or... I often also find that there is like a one way.
Kendra Blake: Mmm.
Gea: offered as being these peaceful humans. There are plenty of gateways. And I find that doing things that you love, even if there is a lot of them, is not a problem. It was never a problem for me to do the things that were rooted in my purpose, no matter how tough life was around me. And even in the midst of early postpartum, everyone was like, you're not supposed to go back to work like this. And I was like, Please just stop, you know? Like from midnight to midnight is what my day is happening in, you know? I have zero support. I have nobody to come to cook for me. I have nobody to clean my house. I have nobody to come and help me out with the baby. Like I'm all there by myself while my husband is working because someone needs to also provide for us while I'm not working, right? And then giving my son. to my husband when he would come back home, locking the door of a room, turning on Zoom to teach an hour. That was a blessing. That was my sanctuary. Work was the only thing that kept me sane at that moment. It was my own little sanctuary, even though I was holding also space for others. But I was also, in a way, holding the space for myself. And I found that plenty of things that I, like just the way that I became a yoga teacher. I was studying mathematics and computer science. I was on Friday and Saturdays. I would work from 6 PM to 7 in the morning in a nightclub because I had to pay for whatever, my trainings, my going out and everything. So I finished my teacher training by finishing work 7 in the morning, showing up at 9 AM. Finish teacher training, go back to work. 7 AM, sleep for an hour, go to teacher training. Comes Monday, eight to eight lectures at the university. It was never a problem. I don't say that this is the best way to do things. I would probably choose different pathways right now. But it's just that I don't find that being busy is a problem. I think being busy with things that drain you is a problem. Living your purpose. rarely feels ⁓ heavy. And then it gets a little heavy, but from there you regulate until you find your perfect measure. Yeah.
Kendra Blake: I'm sitting there and I'm just kind of imagining this younger version of you Gea ⁓ ⁓ you've navigated and how you learned here and I suppose part of me is thinking a little bit ⁓
Gea: ⁓ my god, I was young. Don't... That wouldn't happen right now. Yeah.
Kendra Blake: It's interesting. I'm thinking a little bit about this perfect mother myth that so many of us mothers aspire to. So this image of how we should be as a mum and I'm reconciling this image of like the perfect yoga teacher with the version that you've just explained to me. I'm going, how ironic isn't it that I would see you as the embodiment of yoga, just a yoga philosophy by the way that you're speaking, but it's not.
Gea: on it. Yeah. Hahaha
Kendra Blake: not the stereotype or this idealized, romanticized version of it, it's the true, authentic version of it. There's so much more warmth I have in my heart for that. I think there's something really, what's the word that I'm looking for, enlivening about being able to be with somebody in their full truth, the messy version of it, as opposed to this polished, pristine, pedestal version of it.
Gea: No. Yes. Definitely not Polish. Yeah. But motherhood did help me.
Kendra Blake: both in motherhood or in your work or role. Like, I just love that. that.
Gea: did help me. ⁓ You know, it's also easy with the personality that I am to never feel like you've done enough. In motherhood, what was interesting is I was waiting for my perfect moment. I wouldn't step on my mat because if it's not a 75 minute practice, are you even living? So I ended up not practicing for months. And I was like, what the heck? This is not working. So what motherhood did is a. It pushed me into finding realistic expectations of myself. So I started small. I was like, OK, if I wait for my 75 minutes, it's never going to happen. he does sleep for 10 minutes every now and then. So I was like, maybe if I have my mat rolled out all the time, maybe I can do something for 10 minutes. And uh. That was beautiful because it brought me back in connection to myself, showing me also that we don't need big things as mothers. I find that sometimes when someone wants to help me, they're like, ⁓ yeah, leave your kids with me and go away for two weeks. And I'm like, I don't really need this type of help. I need you to give me 30 minutes. So I found that what motherhood gave me is to understand that ⁓ Little things are really big things, I can live my life, and I love my life as it is. I just need a little break. And in that little break, I did learn how to restore myself a lot quicker than, you know. When I was younger, I had a feeling like I always need a lot of, you know, you need a lot of rest, a lot of vacation, a lot of everything, which is great if you can afford it ⁓ in the shape of your life. Today I'm learning that I don't need big things to be well. I need just small things regularly. Yeah.
Kendra Blake: So maybe I'm going to banjee off of that into how you sustain your work practice gear, especially by virtue of the fact that you are a working mum, as well as holding space for so, many. How do you keep this work sustainable? How do you resource and make sure that you've got a level of resilience to continue to offer the space from a cup that is at least full if not overflowing?
Gea: Mm. ⁓ I think it definitely helps that by doing this work I am absolutely sure that I'm walking in my ⁓ purpose. ⁓ If it wasn't like that, it would feel like it would be heavy, you know. So ⁓ working more, doing more was never a problem or issue for me. I think the challenge that I met was thinking that people who I work with can't meet me there. They can't meet my standard. They can't meet my pace. ⁓ Sometimes I would try to work with someone, and I would be like, ⁓ my god, I would be done with this like seven hours ago, ⁓ which made it very easy for me to do everything. ⁓ I would just take something, learn it, and do it myself. So I did my website. I did my accounting. I did my social media. I did my marketing, because that's how it goes when you're a sole trader. So I think the greatest challenge was to stand in a place where I can trust that people around me can actually help me. And it took a trial and error until I found people who work with me well. But that delegation of work was, I think, one of the greatest learning curves. So it's possible now only because I have people who I trust who can help me. ⁓ If it wasn't for them, I couldn't do it on my own. And oftentimes people think, ⁓ you do all of this alone. I'm like, not anymore. I used to be this person. But ⁓ now I accept helping hands.
Kendra Blake: It's interesting, isn't it? Because you've created such a beautiful community where people have connected in community with others. And what you've just named is that what has made your business more sustainable and possibly even thriving is community. The irony of it, isn't it? And being open to...
Gea: you
Kendra Blake: stepping out of needing to be the kind of perfect sole trader, the perfect entrepreneur, doing it all by yourself and going, actually, I can do this with support from others. And I think that's eye-opening.
Gea: And I also think it's very logical when you think of the definition of community. You community was never meant to be the space where one person does everything and others just come to visit. That's not the definition of community. In community, everyone has a role to play, doesn't it? That's why it works, because people have their obligations. They have their. ⁓ responsibilities. If it's not like that, it's not a community really. So I think that was a big learning curve. I was trying to build a community while myself doing everything and that never works because it's not a community then. Then it's like a following. But if you distribute the load and everyone takes their own responsibility, then we are talking about community.
Kendra Blake: Yeah. Yeah. wonder if in a way it has followed your own motherhood journey to gear and being able to build community around yourself. mean, you said as much at the beginning of our call conversation together, which is you stepped into your own creative way of building almost a village around yourself. And it would not have been the conventional village if you had been at home where you had your family structure, for example, but you've created community around you and your business ownership. capacity, but possibly also in the same breath in your own motherhood journey too, likewise. Does that feel true?
Gea: Yes, and I find that it's very realistic with the journey into mattresses. I don't know if you felt that when you entered motherhood, but I really find this, and it happened to me plenty of times since I became a mother. But also, I witnessed that with a lot of women who I work with. ⁓ almost as if motherhood stretches you to a point and kind of stands heavy on you to the point where you feel like you can't hold anything. Like how can I possibly hold anything more than this? Like how can a human hold anything more than this? ⁓ And it almost then feels as if you kind of fall into like a big dark pit. And all of a sudden, the space that you can hold things for expands exponentially. And every now and then in motherhood, I have met that wall when I felt like I can't do this anymore. And ⁓ only motherhood gave me that expansion that I also don't really know how to explain. I don't know how to explain to someone that I was running on no sleep for. I don't know how many long. I should have ended in a psychiatry in other containers, right? But all of a sudden, it's almost as if, I don't know, there is some strength that comes from I don't know where. And all of a sudden, I was able to hold a lot more space. Yeah. Yeah.
Kendra Blake: Yeah. Yeah, yeah. I speak about that as meeting our edges and I suppose you've named it earlier this idea of surrender, this softening that needs to occur when we do meet those edges because we can step forward with this real desire to control or grasp or figure things out, fix it, but if you almost surrender into it, that softening allows that expansiveness to occur, or at least that's been my experience.
Gea: Mm-hmm. . Yes. Yeah.
Kendra Blake: It's interesting that you bring that around the matresson's journey, so the motherhood journey. I have found that in birthing my business, I've also had the same experience where I've met my edges with it and I've been, ⁓ well, I can't grow any further. And then it's been a surrender to the process and a softening into it where suddenly that sense of purpose has re-emerged. And I felt more aligned with what I'm bringing out there into the world and how I'm working.
Gea: Yeah.
Kendra Blake: and I've met souls that have been able to rally around me and go, yes, this is needed and it's important. And I think the same experience has been very true in my own motherhood journey.
Gea: I Yeah, my teacher always used to say that pregnancy stretches you to your edge. ⁓ Birth breaks you in a way. Not like that there is anything wrong with your body after, but in terms of your understanding of yourself, it can often also break you. But then the postpartum gives this big pit from which you dig your way out. to rebuild yourself and ⁓ to kind of, the breaking is more like a metaphor for rearranging your pieces in a way that is more aligned with yourself once you go through something like that. And I find that what you talk about, the meeting your edges, I can relate that to those moments when there is a decision to be made of how am I going forward from here. And with every decision like that, almost always felt like I'm coming closer to myself. ⁓ that's also, when we run businesses like this, I also feel it's really difficult to separate it from your own personal kind of journey. It's not like I come here and talk about my personal life. It's more the. The challenges that I meet will always be reflected in the business that I run to. And the way that I respond to my life is also going to be the way that I respond to challenges while running a business, in the same way that a woman who has her patterns in decision making or relationship to pain are going to be the exact same patterns that she makes when she is in labor. So in a way,
Kendra Blake: Mm.
Gea: My teacher always also say the way that you do one thing is the way that you do everything. In a way, this is who I am. Yeah. Yeah.
Kendra Blake: So interesting, isn't it? I was reflecting as you're speaking about as an occupational therapist, one of our models is this doing being becoming model. And it's really indicative of what you've just named. And I genuinely feel that motherhood is this ultimate, mean, life, to be fair, is this ultimate journey of becoming, but there's something really quite
Gea: I love it.
Kendra Blake: incredible about the becoming that occurs when you step into motherhood. I think especially as a mother care practitioner, somebody who holds space for women and the more kind of feminine energy, motherhood in its essence is the ultimate of that, isn't it? There's this real sense of just embodiment and becoming if you allow yourself to be in that space. And I agree. I mean, if I even reflect on my own birth process and pregnancy and
Gea: home. Yeah.
Kendra Blake: subsequent postpartum, I'm now 18 months with my youngest. There's a real kind of landing of the pieces back together, but then also this shattering open again and a landing back together and this constant becoming and evolution of self. And it's been very reflective in my own workspace too. Our patterns are our patterns, Gea, you're so right.
Gea: haha Morning. Yeah. Yeah, but I also see it, you know, I understand what you say and I do feel that. ⁓ I also love to for myself to frame it ⁓ more as a return, you know, ⁓ the becoming can also sound as if ⁓ you're not already there, you know, like you're not, it feels like you're reaching for something that is not already there. Well, I always found that ⁓
Kendra Blake: you
Gea: That process of discovery more felt like it was returning me back to my essence rather than, ⁓ you know, yes, reshaping it, but maybe more aligning it with who I really was, but maybe was too young or too scared to say it, be it. ⁓ So, yeah, I also see it as a great return.
Kendra Blake: getting emotional as you name it. Ridiculous. Yeah. I so resonate. Yeah, that's beautiful. Mm Yeah, that returning to self. mean, like genuinely, I've got this well of emotion that I'm trying to keep at bay because otherwise I'll just be a tearful emotional mess because there's something really beautiful about that sense of returning. And and
Gea: Yeah. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
Kendra Blake: Yeah, completely have lost my words around it actually.
Gea: But I also think that both have values. Not every word is ready to come out at all times. And I think there is also great value in ⁓ giving ourselves the space and time for things to unfold as we are ready. ⁓ I often find also that there is a... This idea of urgency with everything and almost as if with that too or like a spiritual journey or everything like there is this urgency to be you know more enlightened, more awakened, more in contact with ourselves and I'm like we have a whole life for it you know. There's no rush. Imagine how boring would it be for us to be enlightened now and then have you know this is it.
Kendra Blake: Yeah.
Gea: What do we do for the next 70 years? It's okay for things to go slowly.
Kendra Blake: Yeah, yeah, it's the process, isn't it? Yeah, so, so true. Yeah, so maybe with that, yeah, I feel like that's a really beautiful space for us to start kind of holding the closure of our chat together. Are there any final thoughts or words of wisdom that you would like to leave with any mothers that are listening or equally any women who are running businesses in the support of mother care, those holding space for other women and mothers?
Gea: Yeah. and Yes, I witness, I work with lot of women, a lot of mothers. ⁓ I see lot of families on my weekly rotation of classes, workshops, And I do see that as a mother and as both of us working with mothers... ⁓ there comes a moment where some things just don't work anymore. ⁓ as a mother, like I've seen, as like a space holder lately, especially I've seen so many moms being made redundant, just like on their return back to work. And often all these places that feel like ⁓ they're the end of you. ⁓ I've also witnessed... so much creativity rising out of it. ⁓ And I often see that as women, when you put us in those places, we can birth things in our own way, just in the same way that we are in our blueprint have the capacity sometimes to birth babies. ⁓ So maybe just that, that in those moments when it feels like, ⁓ everything is falling apart. I always see it as this great little moment to just recollect yourself and maybe choose to do things in a different way. And the more choices we make, ⁓ just small choices to go further with what is true for us, I really witnessed ⁓ this taking us places. ⁓ I found that to be the most important thing, just to whatever you do, to do it with the whole heart. And if you can't do it with your whole heart, maybe just try to do something else. ⁓ And then when I'm rooted in that, everything finds its way, even though there are moments when I cry, thinking we're going to close tomorrow. Or how the hell am I supposed to go through this again? Or why me? ⁓ Somehow things do fall in place when there is a little trust and love in everything that we do.
Kendra Blake: ⁓ I love that, I love that. So maybe with that in mind, this will also be in the show notes for anyone listening. what do you offer? Where are you based? Can you tell us a little bit about what you have available ⁓ those that are listening?
Gea: Yes, thank you so much. I need to work more on speaking about that. ⁓ I own a yoga studio, ⁓ Soma Yoga in Wandsworth in South West London. We have a super rich prenatal and postnatal program here, aside from the whole other thing that we do. I offer prenatal and postnatal yoga classes.
Kendra Blake: Hehehehe
Gea: I offer birth partners workshops, ⁓ which are like a total highlight ⁓ here in the studio and partners rave about them. It's one of my favorite things that I do. ⁓ And in the scope of this work, I also offer prenatal and postnatal yoga teacher trainings ⁓ that I host in person here at Soma, but also I host them online on Zoom and... ⁓ Yeah, there are plenty of teachers around the world doing this training and this feels very powerful, you know. I kind of educate the teachers to do this work and now these communities are built, you know, in Europe, in Australia, in Saudi Arabia, in the US, everywhere. So it's really inspiring to see how ⁓ with the work that we do, we can send a ripple. out there that can hold so much more people than I can do myself. And ⁓ yeah, I think that's it in the scope of the pregnancy and postpartum bubble. Apart from that, I host an online platform. It's called the Online Yoga Club. It's really cool. And I host retreats, other teacher trainings.
Kendra Blake: That's all.
Gea: Yeah, different things out there. But this is kind of more related to the topics we covered.
Kendra Blake: They'll all be linked in the show notes for anyone interested. The online yoga club is fantastic. There's so much depth to it for anybody who can't make their way in person to the studio. Thank you, Gea. It's been so, so wonderful getting to chat to you. Thank you for making the time. I really appreciate your wisdom and probably could chat the whole day with you to be honest. We could. Thank you so much.
Gea: We can do that too. Thank you so much. I really enjoyed this and I love your work. And ⁓ you know that I do. I've invited Kendra quite a while ago to host Mother's Circles in my studio. And ⁓ yeah, I really appreciate all the knowledge you share around this. Thank you.
