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Personality Styles 101 - Today we’re going to discuss the D.I.S.C personality styles and how to use this system to have more influence with anyone you are speaking with, resulting in a higher level of communication and ultimately, developing these skills will be an asset to close more business or, increase your overall effectiveness when putting deals together.
It’s was something I learned early in my career...probably 20+ years ago now. What’s interesting is I use what I have learned probably on a daily basis, if not several times a week. Knowing first who we are and then, to identifying the traits in others has been invaluable over my career. Remember the saying, people that are like each other tend to like each other and birds of a feather, flock together...it’s really true they’re not just “sayings” they are a fact of life. As Realtors, having a solid understanding of the various personality styles, and how to approach each of them, will be an asset and contribute to your success.
A good portion of our success stems from our ability to effectively communicate with others. When we stop to think about it, it’s not just our ability to present our listing presentation to a seller or a buyer our value proposition. It’s more than just this. It’s handling negotiations or comes into play when converting leads into appointments. It’s knowing HOW to present our value proposition, HOW to negotiate or HOW to convert leads into appointments based on WHO we’re speaking with that is the key to our success or, lack thereof.
Knowing who we’re speaking to, and what their preferred communications style is will either build up or break down the relationships we are working to form and dealing with on a regular basis. Knowing how to to do this, having a trained eye, what to look for and a trained ear, what to listen for will serve you well over the course of your career.
Let’s take an example from each...starting with what to look for. At our core, all of us are either more task oriented or people oriented. This also shows up in areas we may not really be aware of. For example, how people select the clothes they wear. If you saw someone that was wearing clothing that was bright or had a busy pattern, (if you’re paying attention and have an awareness about this) we could conclude that they are likely to be more “people” oriented. When you see someone dress more conservatively, solid “safe” colors, a more reserved look, you could conclude they are more “task” oriented. Remember, these are just clues and initial indicators.
What we’re looking for here are speech patterns you may pick up on. Is the person you’re in conversation with talk fast or slow? Is their tone louder, or soft spoken? Are they higher energy or more methodical in the way they communicate? Both will be an indicator of the personality style you are dealing with. Again, when you have familiarized yourself with these patterns and with a good amount of practice, you will begin to see how you can use all of this to have a higher level of influence.
So, let’s take a closer look now at what the characteristics of the D.I.S.C styles.
The DISC is a behavior assessment tool based on the DISC theory of psychologist William Moulton Marston, which centers on four different behavioral traits, which today are called: dominance, influence, steadiness, and compliance. This theory was then developed into a behavioral assessment tool by industrial psychologist Walter Vernon Clarke. There are many different versions of the questionnaire and assessment. Some date back to the 1940s while others are more recent. Marston, after conducting research on human emotions, published his findings in his 1928 book called Emotions of Normal People. The DISC approach suggests people’s personalities fall into four categories. We all have some of each of the four in our make-up, while two of the four are most dominant. Let’s review the most common characteristics of each style. There are four main personality styles...we lead with usually 2 and have some of all 4.
The D Style
What are the general characteristics of the D Personality Style?The “D” 3 -5 % - The D Personality Style tends to be direct and decisive, sometimes described as dominant. They would prefer to lead than follow and tend towards leadership and management positions. They tend to have high self-confidence and are risk-takers and problem solvers, which enables others to look to them for decisions and direction. They tend to be self-starters.
What is the greatest fear of D Personality Types?
The D Personality Type will crave to be in control of the situation and therefore fears the idea of being taken advantage of by others.
What to remember to do when working with D Personality Types?When working with a D, be direct, to the point, and brief. Focus on tangible points and talk about "what" instead of "how." Focus on business instead of social topics and try to be results oriented. Make suggestions for how to achieve the goal instead of talking about why it won't work. Try to thinking like a D, be confident and focus on problem-solving.
What to remember not to do when working with the D Personality Type?When working with a D, it's important not to focus too much on the problems, the negative points, and the small details. They are big picture thinkers and may perceive you as negative. When speaking, try to speak confidently. Avoid repeating yourself or rambling. Don't make generalizations and make statements without support. Focus on the topic and do not be too sociable, they want to get right to the point.
Types of jobs these people may have for employment - CEO/Management, Trial Attorney
What are the general characteristics of the I Personality Style? (People) “I” 25%
The I Personality Style is not afraid to be the center of attention - Influencer. They are enthusiastic, optimistic, talkative, persuasive, impulsive and emotional. This Personality Type will trust others naturally, truly enjoys being around others, and functions best when around people and working in teams.
What is the greatest fear of I Personality Types?Since acceptance and approval by others are the main desire of I Personality Types, Rejection is their biggest fear.
What to remember to do when working with I Personality Types?When working with an I Personality Type, it's important to build rapport and be friendly. Approach Give them plenty of opportunities to verbalize their ideas, as they usually have very creative thoughts and are great problem solvers. Because they have so many ideas and enjoy discussing them, it may take some planning for them to turn their verbal ideas into action. It helps to write details and follow up to see they’ve followed through. They are great motivators of others.
What to remember not to do when working with an I Personality Type?Don't eliminate social time, as this is a very motivating factor for them. Don't do all the talking or strictly tell them what to do, you'll miss the opportunity to hear about their ideas and creative solutions to problems. Don't react to them in a way that makes them feel rejected, this is a great fear of theirs and will result in them feeling insecure.
Types of jobs these people may have for employment - Sales reps entertainment industry, public relations.
What are the general characteristics of the S Personality Style? (People) 45%
The S Personality Type is known for being steady, stable, and predictable. They are even-tempered, friendly, sympathetic with others, and very generous with loved ones. The S is understanding and listens well. Preferring close, personal relationships, the S is very opened with loved ones, but can also be possessive at times and hold them close.
What is the greatest fear of S Personality Types?
Because the S strives for stability and a feeling of peace and safety, they fear the loss of security through change.
What to remember to do when working with S Personality Types?When working with S Personality Types, be personable and build rapport. The sooner they feel comfortable with you, the sooner they will open up to you, especially if they see genuine interest in them as a person. If instituting change, be patient with them, explain your reasoning, and give them time to adjust. It will make them uncomfortable at first.
What to remember not to do when working with an S Personality Type?When working with an S Personality Type, it's important to be kind and patient. Avoid being confrontational, using strong tone or body language, being overly aggressive, pushy, or demanding. They avoid confrontation and will recoil if approached in this way.
Types of jobs these people may have for employment - Nurse/Social Worker, Admin Assistant. Amazing in support roles.
What are the general characteristics of the C DISC Styles? (Task) The “C” 25%
The C DISC Styles are accurate, precise, detail-oriented, and conscientious. They think very analytically and systematically and make decisions carefully with plenty of research and information to back it up. The C has very high standards for both themselves and others. Because they focus on the details and see what many other styles do not, they tend to be good problem solvers and very creative people.
What is the greatest fear of C DISC Styles? Because C Personality Types take great pride in being accurate and correct, they fear criticism. What to remember to do when working with C Personality Types?When working with a C Personality Style, it's best to be prepared. Do your research and prepare your case in advance. Pay attention to the details because this is what the C focuses on. When you can support a statement or idea with accurate data or examples, it will be beneficial. Be systematic and logical in your thinking and planning and specific when agreeing or disagreeing. When disagreeing, work with facts instead of people examples. Be patient, persistent, and diplomatic and remember that they fear criticism.
What to remember not to do when working with an C Personality Type?Do not speak in broad generalizations with no specifics, use details and explanations when possible. Try not to answer questions too vaguely or casually, as they need information and details to make sense of new plans and decisions. Do not criticize the work they've already done as they take great pride in their work. If you do need to criticize, be specific with your examples and be diplomatic. Avoid being confrontational as they will not respond well to this and will close off.
Types of jobs these people may have for employment - Engineer, Scientist, CPA, Pilot
Take aways…Do’s Be curious, know there is always more to the “story”. Talk in their style, meet them where they’re at. When you mirror their style you will begin to notice you’re more influential, thus a more effective communicator.
Don’ts: React should they approach something in a manner you’d approach another way.Make them wrong for being themselves. Force your style on them; it won’t work.
