TRANSCRIPTION 🔗
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Hello, Welcome to Stories Podcast. I'm your host, Amanda Weldon.
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Today's story is a throwback episode. Tune in to hear
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one of our classic stories from the archive that you
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might have missed the first time around. We have Stories
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Podcast merch available at storiespodcast dot com slash shop. We're
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also on cameo for all of your personalized video message needs,
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and don't forget to follow us on Instagram at Stories Podcast.
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If you send us a drawing of your favorite scene
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or character, we'll share it on our feed. Now here's
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a word from our sponsors. Thanks. Enjoy the episode smaller
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than ever. Once upon a time there was a woman
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named Rebecca who lived in a tiny little farmhouse. It
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was all one room, which would have been fine if
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she lived alone. But she didn't live alone. As much
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as she wished she did, No Rebecca was forced to
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share the tiny little farmhouse with her three sisters and
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their three husbands and all of their many, many children.
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It was a packed little house, and it seemed to
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always be full to the brim and about to boil over.
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There's no room in my house, she would cry. Every
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morning she was woken up by the screams and cries
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of the babies. The kids threw food during breakfast and
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kicked her knees under the table and laughed and laughed.
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The husbands were loud, and her sisters were louder. Still,
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with the tiny little farmhouse's solitary room, there was no
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peace to be had. Rebecca only had privacy in two places,
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the privy, which is a bathroom which smelt too bad
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to hide in for long, and the temple. Needless to say,
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she spent a lot of time at the temple. One
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day she was there sitting in a pew when old
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Rabbi Cats found her. The rabbi had been part of
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the town since before Rebecca was born, and everyone agreed
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he was as wise as he was kind, and there
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was none kinder than old Rabbi Cats. Rebecca. He said,
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you're always here. You're always looking so glum. You know,
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I love having Hugh in the temple, but that frown.
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Tell me what's the problem, oh Rabbi? She said, The
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house is so small. The babies are always screaming and crying.
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The kids throw their food and kick my knees and
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laugh and laugh, and the husbands are loud, and my
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sisters are even louder. It's all so crazy and there's
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no peace to be had. The house just feels so small.
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Rabbi Cats thought long, and then he thought hard, and
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then he thought long and hard, all the while stroking
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his big salt and pepper beard. Finally, he leapt up
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with an aha, what is it, Rabbi, I know how
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to fix your problem. Tell me does your family own
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any animals? You've got a few. Yes, we have a
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goat and a cow and a goose. Rabbi, why do
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you ask this evening? When you go home, bring the
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goat inside the house to live with you. Rebecca blinked
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at the Rabbi, processing what he said, bring the goat inside.
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That's right now, run along and let me know how
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it goes. So Rebecca headed back home, and she brought
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the goat inside the house for the night. That's how
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much she trusted the Rabbi. Unfortunately, it didn't go so well,
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and she returned to the temple the next day. Rebecca,
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Rabbi Cats called when she entered, tell me, was my
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idea a success? I'm sorry, Rabbi, but it wasn't any
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help but impossible. Tell me everything well, I brought the
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goat in like you said, but the house felt even smaller,
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and it smelled like a barn to boot. The lousy
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goat bleeded louder than the babies cried, and the beast
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even headbutted one of my sisters, which made the kids
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laugh and laugh. I laughed a little too, but only
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until I tried to sleep. The goat clomped around all
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night long, and when I yelled, it ate the blanket
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right off my back. The house felt smaller than ever.
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The Rabbi listened closely and nodded. Drifting off in thought.
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Load full transcript
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He stroked his bushy beard and scratched his curls, and
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then leapt up. I've got it. What is it, Rabbi?
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You said you've got a cow too, right, Yes, well
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that's what you need to do. Go home this evening
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and move the cow inside. Also. Rebecca looked at him,
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wide eyed. The cow too. It was already so bad
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with the goat and the babies, and the kids, and
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my sisters and their husbands. Just trust me, Rebecca, give
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it a try. Rebecca nodded and headed home, thanking the rabbi.
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She knew he was wise, so she did as he
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asked and brought the cow inside with her. Unfortunately, it
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wasn't a success, and she was back in the temple
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the next day. Rebecca, my Rebecca, Rabbi cat said, tell me,
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did I get it right? This time? Rebecca slumped into
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a pew. Her eyes were dark, and she yawned aloud. Rabbi,
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I'm sorry, she said, covering her mouth. It was a
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long night. I take it my idea and did not
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help well. I brought the cow in like you asked,
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but right away it was no good. She was so big.
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She knocked over the table, and the goat started eating
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all the food, and then the napkins and the plates too.
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A husband got kicked trying to move the cow, and
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my sister got bit trying to move the goat. The
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kids laughed and laughed, and the cow mood and the
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goat bleeded, and it was just no good at all.
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The house felt smaller than ever. She took a deep
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breath and blushed. I'm sorry, Rabbi, it was just a
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really long night. I cannot lie. I thought this might happen.
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It's a tricky thing balancing a home. Lucky for you,
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I've already worked out a solution. It's going to be great, marvelous.
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Even what do I need to do? Well? You mentioned
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the goose. Please don't say it, Rabbi. Move the goose
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in with you two. The house is so small already,
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please for me, just give it a try. Rebecca sighed
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and yawned and nodded. Heading home to her very full,
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tiny little house. She grabbed the goose and brought him
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inside with her and hoped for the best. Unfortunately, the
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best did not come to pass, and she found herself
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back in the temple the very next morning. Rebecca, how
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did it go? He said, But before he even finished,
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Rebecca was already answering how did it go? How did
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it go? Well? Let me tell you, Rabbi, she said,
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half frantic and half asleep. The goose bit a baby,
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and a baby bit the goose. The goat headbutted the cow,
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and my sister slipped in milk. The whole house smells
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like a barn, and the goat bleats, and the cow moves,
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and the goose hogs and hogs and hogs, and the
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whole house is just smaller than ever. She stood there,
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panting for a moment. I'm sorry, Rabbi, she said, I
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just I haven't slept, and I'm a little on edge.
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The Rabbi brought her to a pew and sat them
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both down. He nodded, slowly, stroking his salt and pepper beard.
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All right, I hear your complaints, and I have another
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plan for you. No more, Anna, Rebecca said miserably. Please,
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just no more animals, exactly, said Rabbi Cats, no more animals.
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I want you to go home and put all of
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the animals back in the yard. Rebecca blinked at him
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in disbelief. Back in the yard outside. That's right, Send
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the goat and the cow and the goose all back outside. Well.
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Rebecca was confused, but didn't question it further. That night,
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she went home and sent all the animals outside, and
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the next morning she was back at the temple. Rebecca,
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tell me, how are you doing, Rebecca took a deep breath. Well,
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with all the animals outside, it's so nice. There's no
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bleeding or mooing or honking, and no one hadbutted anyone
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or ate a blanket or bit a baby. It just
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feels so peace now, I swear, Rabbi, the house has
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never felt bigger. The Rabbi smiled. Ah, Rebecca You're welcome,
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he said, because he was wise, and he knew that
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sometimes all you need is to see how much worse
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things could be to remember how good you already have
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it the end. Today's story, Smaller Than Ever, was an
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adaptation of a Yiddish folk tale, written for you by
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Daniel Hines and performed for you by me Amanda Weldon.
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If you would like to support Stories Podcast, you can
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leave us a five star review on iTunes. Check out
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all of our merch available at stories podcast dot com,
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about us. Thanks for listening.