#132 Live From St. Louis!

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Speaker 1: The nick Lizer Podcast. Here is Nicky here? I am Oh that was loud. Hello everyone, Welcome to the Nicky Glazer Podcast Live edition. No, uh, how are we feeling? This is unbelievable and it's so exciting. Usually I have to say to anyone who's listening at home, UM, I know how you feel about live episodes of podcasts. We all know we listen to podcasts. You usually skip the live ones because they're not as good as in person, and you're jealous of the people that are there, and you should be. All these people are gonna have a great time tonight, but we are going to have a great show for our listeners as well, and we're thinking about you. You're here in spirit kind of. I've got honestly forgot we had any other listeners. Um, how are you doing tonight? No? Uh, I mean I'm blown away by all of this. What way it blows you away? The most? Our besties, Yes, I know so many fans of the show. That's I'm overwhelmed by it. And we can see them all. Usually when I'm on stage, everyone is in the dark. And how do you feel about that? Well, I'm blurring my eyes, you know. I yeah, someone just said that, I blur my eyes so I don't have to make eye contact with anyone because I feel like when you do make eye contact, their force to laugh, and it's just like it's kind of raping them into a laugh, and I just don't want to it's the nicest way to say That's not the nicest way to say it. That's actually how was that the nicest way to say it? I love how that was me covering up. That was honestly the worst way to say it, But that's how it feels. It's like I never want to make someone do anything against their will, and so when I look at people, I think early on in my standard career, I realized when I would look down at someone like a nervous girl, that would be just like judging my boots and um, if you have any questions posh mark plus shipping and uh. But yeah, I would just see a girl judging my boots and then she would like see me see her, and then she would just go and it was just like, oh no, I just like raped her into that, Like it just felt like she gave me something, the same way I used to feel when men would be like smile and I would always do it because I'm like, this is the least I can do to not get raped right now, Like what what might you do if I don't? I would just be like it's the tiniest little rape. And so I don't like to do that to anyone. So and I do like to say that although we are, you know, doing this live podcast and I can see all of you and uh, you know, we're there's cameras around which you know people on the podcast. No, I don't know why they're here. We're so confused that cameras keep following, but it's happening. Um. I want to just extend to you everyone here, Um, if you want to go to the bathroom at any time, we are not going to be like, oh, look at this guy taking a ship, Like we're not going to call you out. I promise you I won't even look at you. Now that I've said that, everyone will think you're taking a ship. But I'm not going to be the one to say it. And I just feel like I have to say that now my life shows because people get so especially now with COVID being over and everyone being so you know, inside for so long, which really behooves some people's like, you know, lives. I remember my parents kind of talking about when things were first starting to open up and we had the vaccine. They would go, you know, um, our friends, they don't want to go out there. They're just scared of it. And I go, are they vaccinated and and and you guys, and it's like what they know, who's going and everything? And they go, no, they're they just they're scared of the COVID And I go, no, they have social anxiety, that's what they have. Like that, it's the COVID is the best thing to ever happen to people with social anxiety, which is not it's not a judgment, but people have it. So when people venture out to go to my shows, and I think I especially attract fans who might deal with mental health issues, especially anxiety and going to things. I asked people to go alone to things. I'm asking a lot of people to come out of their house and then they might get seated in the middle of a section of the audience. And I've been with Andrew. We went to go see Dear Evan Hanson. Do you remember that? One Broadway Andrew and I went to go see Dear Evan Hanson, and I had never known this about Andrew, but he had a lot of anxiety about being stuck, you know, like being not being able to get out. And it's a common fear that I've never known, but a lot of people related to it. And I was like, what's going on? And he was just like, very scared that at some point he would have to go the bathroom have a panic attack and it would disturb the show and then it would just so he so then that makes his anxiety even worse. So I like to always consider that person that might have that and say, you can do whatever the funk you weren't during this. I will not be like you're sucking it up. You can like have a panic attack, you can scream out. We won't. We don't care. Just be yourselves and be comfortable and anything can happen, right Yeah, yeah, like this is a safe space. Yeah except for my mom. Mom, behave yourself. You are not allowed. Just kidding. Um, yes, yes, okay, So no, Uh, we're in St. Louis. You flew in yesterday. You're staying across the street from me. Um, what are your thoughts on St? Louis? Have you been here before? I've never been to St. Louis before. Yeah, it's really quaint, actually quaint. Yeah, I just I'm so tickled by that because, as you know, I have kind of realized this is my home now, and you know, for the time being, I'm loving it. Like I remember the apartment, the you know, in the high rise that you got in New York that you were paying so much for that you never got to live in. Do do ever go to that place? I didn't, but I knew about it. Yeah, Um, I am reluctant to talk about that place. My mom still has nightmares about the money that was spent on that apartment. For those of you who don't know, I moved to my parents house during COVID because I was I signed a lease on an apartment in New York for March one, and I was in l A until March fourteen, so I was not even to be living there until the you know, mid month. And I had decided at this point in my life, I was making good money. I was having a fantastic this was going to be my year, as which my agents have said for the past you know, four years, but and then once did your year is the next year not your year like that kind of bummed me out. I'm like, I don't want any year to be my year. I wanted to just just keep pushing it, but it was supposed to be my year, and um, and I'm so sorry about it because my year. I really fucked up my year for everyone. I think it was. It was my responsibility and I don't know what I did, but um, so I got this place so much money. Um, you know whatever you're thinking, it was double it Like honestly, it's disgusting. And the reason I did because I don't have kids, I don't like buy a lot of expensive things. I I was just like, people in my life are just like, treat yourself. You deserve it, Nikki. That's what I hear a lot. You work so hard, you are so hard on yourself. I lived in like shitty apartments for so long. I decided to spend four times as much I've ever spent on an apartment and I got rid of all my furniture that I have accrued since like college. But it was all crap, and I was like, I'm gonna start over with a designer. I hired this woman that did second hand um designing, so she only found salvage materials, which there's only one woman in Manhattan that did that, so that is someone get into that job because like green stuff is like I couldn't believe there was one. I think she charged me eight to eleven grand for a lamp she found, like for all the work that went into it. She she did the whole place. So she did a lot of work. And I got an invoice for like eight somewhere around eight to eleven grade. I remember, I don't know why. I don't know the specific number. It's just too painful and um, and I really bad it looking at money. But then all I got it was a lamp out of it. But I was like, you know what, I learned a lesson, just do it yourself next time. I never moved into the apartment because I just was in l A when COVID hit. Moved back in with my parents. UM just decided to just go with them since my mom was out in l A with me to go be on the Kelly Clarkson Show. We were gonna tape it in March. It was gonna Aaron May for the Mother's Day Show. It was a pretape and things started getting shut down. The Hanks got COVID. That's when we know it was real and we go, holy sh it, And I just wanted to be with mommy and Daddy. Moved back home to St. Louis. Um thought a couple of months, a couple of weeks, a couple of months, kept going, and then um yeah, and then my apartment I couldn't get. People kept going just don't pay rent, just don't do it, like that's what everyone's doing. And I go, but won't you have to pay it at some point and they're like, oh yeah, but just not now. I'm like, well, I don't want to deal with that. Just I'll pay it now. So I paid eight thousand dollars a month for ten months of an apartment. I only went in one time because I needed to get some weed out of an old box that was there, so I had to go through a box. My assistant at the time was living there. She had a good time. But um, you know what and and and something I talked about on the podcast all the time is just acceptance of like your body, yourself, your flaws, the things other people say about you. I mean, the listeners that are here, if you've listened to all the episodes. You've heard me in some really dark places and how I've gotten out of those, and that for me, I think my mom can even attest this. You were very upset about that number at the time of that. I was that eight number. Yeah, I mean, it's a gusting I'm I'm embarrassed to admit that. But it had an elevator as the front door like it, Oh, the door was an elevator. That You've made it right. The only thing though, that I was actually glad I never lived in there, is that if someone would have broken into my house, Like imagine being in your bed late at night and and hearing something and instead of hearing a guy like breaking the door, you just hear ding, You're like hello, Like that would be scary. So I kind of felt okay about it, but I really did just learn, you know what, that was never my money to have, that was always going to go to that. There was nothing I did wrong there. I didn't know a pandemic was coming. Of course, the timing was so inopportune, so ironic that I got my lease then, but that I have to do what I said I was gonna do, which is pay my rent, and I did it. And you know, I can't wait. I can't spend every day going I can't what would I do with that, because honestly, I probably just buy a Taylor Swift guitar that has a sticker on of a autograph I already own, which is a thing that happened to me. I have a question for you, Yes, how are your feet feeling? Thank you so much for asking, because today it was a rough day for me. I'm not gonna lie. I don't I don't like to lie. I went over to my parents house and um, I had a voice lesson with my new best friend Aria, and uh. I brought her over to uh, you know, coach me and my dad on a song, and she was having me hit some notes that were just not easy for me, and it just made me feel I don't like doing things I'm bad at and I was sounding bad and so much like the dogs left the room like and and it was the type of sounds that you thought dogs would come to, you know, like just screeching, high pitched frequencies and they were fleeing. Marian was offended and so I started crying. And it was nice because I think the only time I can really cry is when I sound bad singing. I don't know what it is, but I kind of just cry every time I sound bad singing. And I had struggle crying, as you know, I don't know if it's antidepressants or just like feeling like oh, you said, nicky, so it feel good to like cry. And then later on I cried again about crying, and I was like, oh my god, what's going on with me? Like I'm just like something's sucking up, you know, Like I was just do you ever have that feeling where you're just like, why do I like I want to like hurt myself today or like drive into a tree or like a off a bridge. And then you go to the bathroom and you start bleeding and you're like, oh, okay, I thought I wanted to drown my dogs because I was crazy, but it's because I'm hormonal, and it's it's just all of a sudden. It was so funny because these camera people are falling me around and it was embarrassing to cry in front of all of them a couple of times. And then I go to the bathroom and I go I'm bleeding. I'm on my period, and everyone just like ah and I'm like off the hook for it. It's so nice. That's the nice thing about being a woman. We complain about periods, but it gets you off the hook. So that being said, I was feeling kind of down tonight and like feeling even on the way here. I was like, how am I going to get it up for this? And obviously I feel very up. But one of the things that contributed to that was that I found out so when we were planning this whole thing, I mentioned one of the people that's following me around with cameras, I don't really know what's happening that I go, oh my god. An ideal situation would be if someone were like, we got a footmoth SEUs to like rub my feet on stage, totally joking, like just a comment. You'd be like, like, I didn't think anyone even heard. I said it to the like no one. And tonight you texted me while I was driving over here with Andrew Mandy's here, and I was like, who's Mandy? And you go at the Massius and then all of a sudden, one of the camera people that are following me around for no reason, they go, yeah, it's the mastuits that you asked for and I go, I what that I conjured from saying a thing that I didn't even know I said out loud. And I am so fucking excited because how ironic is it that this is happening. I did not know that what's gonna happen. And on the podcast episode this morning that we did, I pulled in our foot massage and had a foot massage from our machine going during the podcast. So tonight I have that foot massage has come to life, like um, Beauty and the Beast and we uh, she is going to join us on stage and she's just gonna rub my feet during the show. If that's okay with people, because I'm not weird about it. It It might be weird at first. We're gonna feel it out, but like I deserve this and I want this so bad, Like you don't understand. This is gonna make me so happy that I just feel like if I go to see a performer, I want whatever is going to make them the happiest because it's contagious, right, So just if this is weird to you, just know that it's making me so happy. And you know, my bunyan embracing my bunyance has been very hard. Mandy, come on up, but please don't speak. Um no, I'm just kidding. Welcome Mandy to the stage. Hi Mandy, Mandy already massage my feet, my friend's feet. My friend and I went to you where do you work again? Indigo Massage in St. Louis and they're fantastic and um, she did my friend Kirsten's feet and uh and then I found out afterwards you were like, and I'm a fan and I didn't know it during the whole time. So you're welcome. Uh, thank you so much. This is like amazing and we're just gonna like talk and have a good time. Um. Is this the first time you've ever massage someone's feet at a live podcast? Say things? Yes, yes, okay, Um, well it's the first for me as well. And just go hard get in. Those Bunyans really work this web space in between this, Um and I am so I'm so excited for this. Should we bring in? I think so? Should we bring him in? All right? I think it's time. Hey, Andrew, what's up? Look at this dude? Hi guys, I want to see you guys. So happy to be here. Yeah, Oh my God, it's funny. I want to use it. Andrew, how did you sleep last night? I woke up a while. Yeah, I don't know. I slept fine. I guess I didn't hear you watching Bachelorette. Yeah every night. Yeah, you've been alone in the past couple of nights. I don't cry. When I watched The Bachelor? What are you talking? What are those sounds that? Um? I don't know. I mean I I cannot get through the Bachelorette. I am so bored by it. And this season there's a guy on there. I talked about it earlier, but Mom, did you see the Bachelorette. There's a guy who got caught with notes for how to win on the Bachelorette and it's yeah, the first night, and I feel so bad for that guy because the guy I just wanted to be prepared for this weird show he's on. He doesn't know what he's doing, so yet he drew up some notes and these girls go in and they're like room writers. This is the thing we always do, except it's not. It's definitely a thing that one of the producers while they were producing him and being like, what are you gonna wear in her first night. They were like, wait, he has some fucking notes over there. They probably took a sneaky picture of it. They went back to the producer tent and they go, guys, we have well I was, I was be on the scenes on f Way Island. I know there's a tents all over the place. I don't want to I don't want to blow anyone's minds right now or like ruin the shows. But they got tents. There's sense where there are conversations happening. So I'm guessing user went back and he was like, guys, I saw notes. This guy has tons and pages of notes, and I saw at the top and said how to succeed on the back start? And they're like, well, how are we going to get those notes? That seems like an invasion of privacy to steal them. Oh, let's just create a thing we've never done where two of the old contestants go in and kick the guy out and go through his room and go through his stuff. And so they find these notes and then oh, are they going to bring it to her right away and go there's a guy on this show that has these notes? No, they're gonna let her go on a date with him and have a little fun and have her be invested in them, and then they're gonna be like, hey, we just think it's only right for you to know he has notes and bt dubs. She didn't even like this guy to begin with. This is the tricks of all this show. Let me just say, because when you go back and watch it, all of the all of her, like she goes on the date and they show like her. So whenever you watch the reality show is don't want to blow your mind. But anytime the character, like the bank character is talking in like a one the one person in thing where they're just making commentary alone, they're doing that way after the fact of everything that happens, you know, but it doesn't even even I get tricked knowing that. Sometimes I'm like, oh my god, they don't know what's coming. And she has so much hope. She is talking about this. She's like, I don't know, he's checking all the boxes and this, and she's on the date and you can tell she's like, oh my god. But in retrospect, they wanted it to seem like, oh, she had a lot of faith in him, so this note seems like, oh, but she didn't like him at all, So now she's she's fulling it in. She's like, I don't know, he brought me to an ice cream cut truck. I'm thinking he's the one. And then of course Tatian Caitlin come in and they're like, oh my god, he has notes. She goes and she makes him creepy. Yeah, they were weird, but at first he was like my friend's wife wrote them, and then I wrote some too, and she was like the dog and then the dog. You just tried to get out of it. I think if you had a guy though taking notes, he watched all your special I would be so flattering if I was on a show where but they were like outline and like you know, the numbers and crepelling and if he you know, wrote in like you know, run on sentences or you know, like that's really what makes me just like check out is bad spelling, but I think it shows effort and listen, if we are for a second thinking that anyone going on Bachelor in Paradise is looking for love, what are you trying to pull on us? Bachelor Nation or my dad became a member during COVID, he joined Bachelor Nation. We got him into it. He had to take the test. What dad, what's the capital Bachelor Nation Milan? But it's okay, it's been a while. No, he had to take a whole test and pledge is you know, Yeah, gents, that's the right things, Dad, thanks for chiming in now. Um, he was so happy when you moved out. No, you're a Mr. Bachelor. He's like, get the animal like sleep. So many guys like these shows, they really do because they are compelling and they're fun. You know what, girls, I enjoy watching men watch these shows because I get to see I get to see how men like process, you know, hot women, and have even judgments of these perfect specimens, Like these women are all tens. You know. St. Louis tense. Let's be honest. But like l A seven's that's why I like living here. Um, dude, I'm not joking. You're all so beautiful and I'm so flattered to have like good looking bessies. No, we really do have hot fans. I'm not even joking, Like I don't have to lie about that. But being in l A for this. I got off the plane the other day and I lived there for years, and I was just like I gotta get the funk out of here. Like it was everyone's so hot and it just it wasn't like I'm not hon enough. It just looks so exhausting to like be that hot and so like always have like your look pretty while you get your feet might be like you like a prima don I mean with snake earrings and looking hot. I mean, this is not someone who is trying to look cool shark ring. I'm wearing snake earrings. I'm wearing a shirt made by a bessie. Um. Okay, Andrew, let's talk about you're obsessed with Squid Game. How many people in the room have seen Squid Game? Yeah? Yes, okay, all right, I have not seen it. You are obsessed with it? Yeah? Any anything else? Okay? Well no, I have a couple know. The ending I thought was terrible. I think you should have got on the plane and and don't. I don't know you're telling me doesn't get on there's a tent or something. I don't watch the first episode and be like, I know he doesn't get on the plane, and like it's going to ruin it. I'm never going to watch it. It seems to like unret nervous and yeah, you know how I feel about Like that's what the big words like octopus, teacher or squids. We're gonna be like eating or something. Do you ever watch muck Bangs where Asian women are eating like live octopuses and stuff. Maybe that's poor. No, that's a real thing. So why is it squid? Why is it called squid? Because it was a game that I don't want to give it away, but this is the first episode, and then he didn't get on the plane in the last one. But one time I told my buddy, who kais are? So it was before he watched and it was probably the most shitty thing I've ever done. But in retrospect, Kevin Spacey taught me he got me. Yeah, he really. He was like, oh, yeah, you're gonna give way who I am in that movie where do you find Out Who I Really am? Which I had a limp that one's coming. Uh yeah, that is uh dark. Okay, Anyways, those shows great. Yeah, yeah, I recommend it. It's I think the first episode is probably one of the best first episodes ever. I love this guy. He's like downtrotten. And he claimed that he was the best actor you've ever seen in your entire life today? Who's seen the show? Who? Yeah? How good is that act? Is he really great? What's his name? What's his name? Thank you so much? Noah, daniel Lewis I think that and DiCaprio. Yeah, yeah, but I just wear his wardrobe, do you this guy's wardrobe? We know that you tend to just kind of rip off celebrities, but wait for them to die, for them to die opioid crisis to take their life, and then you swoop on in. It's true. Bourdaine died and then a couple of weeks later he was just sporting some like kind of new kind of John Varvados boots and I go, what the hell are those? And he goes, I don't know. I saw Bourdaine wearing and I go, when when were they dangling Jesus in the casket? Yeah, he looked pretty cool. And then he always looked like he was dead though, to be honest, Yeah, he had a very dead cheek. Yeah, oh god, he was a cool dude. That that one bummed me out a lot. You know, what's what's been the number one celebrity death that you were like rocked by? Tom petty. Oh yeah, that's yeah. I would you know, listening with my dad, did you cry? Uh a little bit? I remember I was in the park and I was trying to cry. I was like I should be crying. Oh yeah, I love when you talking should cry and then you don't cry, and like you're a sociopath. Yeah yeah, and when your mom dies and you just heart like you know, you gotta calling. I'm just putting a scenario where he cry. Uh no, you the funniest moment. Can I tell the moment where you cried? Yeah? Oh god? Ok. We were in the we were in Cayman filming f Boy, and we were swimming after a shoot. I smoked your ass in a swim ray Yeah yeah he did. I challenged him in a swim race. He beat me and it was humiliating because that's the only sport that I feel like I'm any good at. And uh but I recovered and we were You did a butterfly, which was fantastic. Thank you, Thank you for Yeah, she has a great butterfly. She really does thing. Can we give it up for a butterfly? Look at that? Look at that? I mean, um, you just yeah, yeah, you gotta have that look like a poster over an executive desk. That's like, I don't know why we we were in. It was this beautiful sunset on seven mile Beach, which is really five miles because of erosion or something. I don't know, that's what they say. And uh, it was the sun was setting and I was kind of over it because you guys know how I feel about nature. I was like, oh, google image it later. And so I went inside to go pee or get something to eat. And I come back and uh, and I leave Andrew alone just standing in the water. It's calm water, sunset beautiful and this you know, crystal clear water. And we come. I come back, and then you join me up at the you know, we're sitting kind of like in the dark now, uh, at the twilight. And you come up and you're kind of somber. You wrap atal around yourself and you're just kind of sitting there and you go, no, I just that sunset just can't made me cry. And I go, oh my, really, I got I think I probably was like you pussy. I go, you cie, and you go and I go, what you're butterfly? Wasn't that good? It wasn't really that great? No, I think. I was like, wait, how did you do that? How did you cry at a sunset? Like I've never seen you cry something so beautiful? And he goes, what did you say? I thought it was Actually I thought of my mom because she does sad. But she has emphyzema, which is cop D, which is uh, I gotta keep going because there's a lung disease which she has to be on oxygen, so she can't travel that much. And she definitely can't swim in the ocean because it's not a scuba tank, it's an oxygena. It doesn't work that way. I tried. I pushed her in, but she just she just saying right away it was yeah, it was weird, but she's still going. But yeah, but you were like, yeah, my mom. Just like I just realized I was getting to do something that my mom will probably never ever get to do again, you know, And I go, oh my god, and I almost started tearing up. I was just like, that is like really sad. I was like, so did your mom, Like, did she like love swimming? And he goes, no, I don't think I've ever seen her in the water. She never We lived on the water and she didn't go near it, like went pre oxygen. I'm talking when she had all her lung she was still swimming, not all she hated the beach. Actually, maybe that's why I was crying, because I was like, man, I hate to be so funny, does you being like, no, I never even saw her stuff foot in water, not even a bath. We grew up in Florida, Like, there's no excuse, so that we just started saying like a bus would drive by it to be like, I can't believe your mom will never get hit by a bus again, or even an option for her because she like, I mean it just you can you can make it anything. Yeah, it's yeah. I mean you know she'll never you know, you know, something creative. She'll never something creative again, you know. Yeah, I'm so jealous. It's like tingling. You don't like, you're so calm, you have like a very stop hitting on her. I'm not her, but I love your hair. Baby. No, I'm just more. No, she is so they're so goodna is not listening, don't worry, it's uh. I just I'm so sad she'll never get to swim again. It sounds like she's let me see we miss you. Um no, uh massouits masseurs licensed massage the lm T s. But that takes out the hand job part of it, right, MASSU says, you think she's gonna give me something? You think, Well, I think that's why they go licenseed massage therapist. You know you're not going to get a happy ending. They're gonna you know, they're gonna just that's what Then is the places you used to frequent Okay, so you're a l Yeah you have a you have a very yeah their therapist. Yeah, um, you have a very calming vibe about you. And yes, this foot massage is fantastic and I yeah you. I've been making you give me massages on the road. I'm not a great job, and but you're so good at it and it makes me so mad because I have to beg you and you won't do it. And sometimes I'm like do it, like why, like this isn't me as you offered me money. At first I didn't. Then I don't want the money. I don't want the money, and then I didn't give it you. But that was reverse licensed massage psychology. Honey, I obviously always want the money. Who doesn't want to pay you. Okay, I will pay you for massage. I've been keeping it. You'll do it for two seconds and then when I start going ow, you dig harder. It's like that's your sign, you know, when you have sex sometimes and you're like, oh, that's great, and then they keep doing but they change it. Women do it too. I hear it as a common complaint on Reddit. It's like if we if we tell you we like it, don't change it. Like, I think that's a thing that happens. That's what you do with massages, Like you'll go harder and you really do torture me, which I love. You could go harder, but I don't want to hurt your hands. But it doesn't hurt your hands. Do you ever, like do you have to do exercises? You build up indoorance? Okay, get ready for that? Yeah, I mean it's a pretty her dad has. It's even bigger. I mean, look at that one's crankin. I know it's big. I don't know how your skin holds it in. I know it's it's about to crack, you know what I mean. I think the same thing. It's like a pregnant woman's belly have to rub like oils on it and and and sing to it at night so it recognizes my voice. Wait, did you does it ever come out of the skin though? Have you ever seen at night? Mine does? And it comes in your room and it gently just nuzzles your head. Yeah, yeah, No it doesn't. There's no you want to ask. You asked me about bunions, don't. She's busy. I know about it does not come out of the skin. The skin can hold a bunyon in. That's the rhyme. But every podiatristler, no, they don't come out of this kid. We gotta get to the news. Let's get to the news. It's Wednesday, folks, and you know what that means. It's Funday. It's so weird, like honest, like yes, and like it is only dawned on me recently from meeting fans after shows that like it's a real thing and like it and I know what it's like. I listened to the Arch Morning Show, the Courtney Show every single morning, and I like look forward to getting out of bed because I know there's going to be people live talking to me and like do and I know all the bits I know the inside jokes. One of those people is here tonight, Chris Convey from The Courtney Show. I really recommend I recommend that show to our listeners. You can get it on the the Arch app no matter where you live, but it is on one of six five the R in St. Louis. But I just I get it, you know. It's I get that kind of obsession with a show that's there for you every day, and that's why I wanted to make it four days a week. And when I meet people and they're like we're I feel like you're my friend. I go, no, you are like we are. And I don't want to extend that to people who have mental illness that makes them think that we should be together forever and stuff like that. But most people, Yes, yeah I do, and I find it out usually when there's a blade in my stomach um during a meet and greet. I can't wait to wear your outfits after you like boy friend clothes, the ones they're like baggy boy friends. All right, first story, we're so good at that alright. Hiker who got lost? This is crazy already sorry, I already heard this on The Courtney Show. This was this guy. He was on a Colorado mountain for more than twenty four hours. He ignored calls from rescuers because he didn't want to pick up an unknown number. I don't blame him. I have so many creditors. I'd rather die on that mountain then talk to another guy being Mr. You have four grand for that penis pump? You boss? You didn't even you were like, you have a little way away. Yeah, it's a lot of payments. Yeah, it's a it's a payment per pump. Actually, that's that's how it works. You're right, dude, Like that those calls, That just shows how much people When I call a number and I know they don't have it in their phone, when they do pick it up, I go, what's wrong with you? Like, why would you? You shouldn't answer them? You should text before, you should give a pre empt. Yes, yes, exactly. Hey does is Nikki pick up? I'm calling you in a minute and then you call and then they're dead on a mountain? Yes? Yes? So did rescue team spent all evening searching for this guy. The guy got home safe, He just didn't answer his phone. So he wasn't like stuck the whole time. Oh, he wasn't like waiting for stuff. He was like, I got it. Yeah, he was a man. Yes, people are like we'll help you. It's like the no, I think I know what I'm doing and ignoring it. Yeah, I mean, I mean, if you were stuck on a mountain, how long do you think you'd last. I wouldn't be on a mountain. Um, I would not get stuck. I would not everyone lost in the woods. Yeah. I got lost skiing one time. I went down the path. I was faster than my parents and I kind of went off on my own. It was very scary. I was rescued by some like nearly ski bums, dude or whatever dragged but they were just like this twelve year old girl doing by herself at the bottom of the you know, King tut lifts or whatever it was. And uh yeah, and they scooped me up and then I was you know, and that's how I became Peekaboo Street. And I really didn't feel like I wanted to be adopted into the mountain and like become a I wanted to grow up on a mountain and be a professional ski I got stuck on a mountain once you did, it's weird. Yeah, I just I was in color or no, I was in Canada, and my buddies went down faster than me because you know, twelve falls. And we nicknamed him twelve Falls because we went skiing last year right January, right before the pandemic, and he he had a rough day. It was like it should have been he had he had only snowboarded. Really it was his first time skiing and forever. But I would had just like a giggle fest. I was just in that kind of loopy mood of just giggling. And I asked Andrew, go, how do you know how many times you fell today? Goes, I don't know. Twelve times. That's like a lot to fall, like, that's a lot, and so we nicknamed him Old twelve Falls. Yeah. So anyway, that was dug on the mountain fall, I guess, and I ended up going down. It's a ten it was called oh yeah, and I didn't know what ten. I didn't know what that. No, it's ten kilometers. So it was just a green that just so by the time I got down, it was like nighttime and my friends, my friends were all betting that I was dead. And then and then they were like, we're gonna go helicopter skiing tomorrow because Andrew slowing us down, and so they were all happy hopefully I was either or like broke a leg. Oh my god, and then they saw me. Just what's it called when you pizza? Yeah? It was pizza and it's like nighttime. And do what I like about you? Though you do things you're bad at, you like you're not scared to do things that you're bad at. Like you you're you're adventurous kind of. I did jump out of a plane once. You did when we went to go see the sting rays and came in your way. When you involved an animal, I'm all in that's where people go, whoa nikki? You love nature? I thought you hated it. I'm like, but there's an animal, I'm getting in there, but stingrays. You were obsessed that it was what about stever? When I'm like, name one other person that's been killed by a singwright, like it's the big one. But so do you google anything? And like these are they were so friendly, they were proven friendly and even with the facts, you were still scared. Although I did get bit by one. It was thrilling. I got like nipped by one and it was really thrilling, where like on the on the thigh, I was like, what, I don't know. I mean, it's just tell us, Andrew, how do you feel about stever When are you gonna cry? No, I'm just mad you only had one outfit. It's only green. Are you serious? Come on, buddy, don't you ever steal it? I would try? No. But the thing about okay, can I just say stever win was it was like a bowl ray. So it was like this, it was the type of thing ray that like it can like it is a different kind of thing ray, you see. Yeah, that's it's like it was very dangerous these other ones unless you step on them while they're sleeping. They only get one barb to shoot off. And they're not going to shoot off a barb unless it's like unless it does have a bar but it has to shoot it off. It's not gonna like you touch it. And it's like, you know what I mean, Yeah, but I'm scared. It was a pandemic. Okay, what's happening? Oh it sounds like someone seeming something. Oh all right, well I don't I don't hate it. That's kind of like comforting and something just to pass out. All right, young Americans are having less sex than ever before. Study wrapped up two years before the pandemic. I don't understand a study that's from two years ago. But I don't know. But we'll keep going. You know, they just put in the data. It took a long time. The spreadsheet was confusing. Yeah. According to studies authors, there are several explanations to go, go go seven. Busy lifestyle means less time to have sex. Heads buried in tech devices a lot. Additionally, an increase in anxiety and depression and young adults failure to launch, women opting out of casual sexual encounters, and the royal smartphones have played in making us we got it Matthew McConaughey, movies, um, failure to launch, Okay, you want to keep going? Like what else? Anxiety through technology doesn't help young people develop the social and intimacy, intimacy skills and vulnerability needed to be in physical relationship. That makes that makes sense, it does. But I think you fun way more because of your phone. That that's actually truths because it's like easier to make hookups. I read a great meme the other day that was like you read it, you know, like a tweet that's like a picture it said. I forget where I heard it. Maybe I heard it on your show, Chris, But it was about um how someone was like, oh, oh you met oh dating apps. Dating apps are so weird. Everyone meets on dating apps now. I used to just go out and meet whoever was around, Like, wait, why why is that bad? That person? That person? That's true though, like dating used to be just like whoever's around, and for some reason, that's more noble than like an app where you can actually specify what you're looking for, you know, yeah, no, I think I mean for a while, it was weird to meet on the internet. It was so embarrassing. Yeah, weird. And it's like now if you meet at a bar, you're fucking freak. Yeah, and a pandemic, you know. Yeah yeah, um it's You're right. When you do meet people, you just assume you met online or on Instagram, Like dating apps equal Instagrams, instat or something. But meeting like you and your boyfriend Noah, like you had met each other through we met in real life. We met in real life, and then seven years later I requested a fault, you know, like I requested to follow him and then he DM me you made the first movie you request on Instagram? Yeah, yeah, that's a good man. Wait, did who made the first DM? He did the first DM? Remember we did the book him? What you did the book on him? Because you had already gotten the book? Who here knows about the book? Yes? Okay? Good? Oh you got engaged? Oh my god? What did were you engaged before you read the book? Did the book help you get engaged? Okay? But did it help you have a better relationship? You did you learn from the book? What you learned? What's the most important thing you learned from the book? Speak with feelings versus I think? Right, leave the I thinks for him? Yeah. The hardest thing with that if you feel like she has a hard time if you no, no, no, he thinks yeah. If you don't know the book, it's called Getting to I Do, and it talks about masculine and feminine energy and and most relationships about I would say, in a straight relationship, heterosexual relationships, the man is the mask, wants to be the masculine energy, the woman is the feminine energy. And one of the things is it teaches women how to speak to a masculine energy man so that he can receive it better and how you can be more understood. And what it tells you is like, don't tell a man. I think always just talk about your feelings and never ask a man how he feels. In less you're paying No, he's on fire. That's so, that's what she said. Dr Pat Allen said, don't ask a man how he feels unless he's on fire. They don't want to talk about this on the phone. She's very, very intimidating and she and she also did our show you up. Yeah, I had a private consult with her. Yeah, she's she. I mean, she's almost like that Dr Ruth kind of character, you know, very sex positive. But no, no bullshit with this one. I think her first husband died and now she is with someone else and she just she goes, I'm a I'm a badass bitch in the office place. She's like, you are intimidated by I mean, she's scary and she's goes when I go at home, when I go home, I am very docile. I'm just one. I'm like, very receiving energy. I'm the opposite because I gotta I gotta change, because that's what I wanted A relationship. I don't want to be the one that's like, I think this. So it's interesting that you say that I think and I feel. So women are instructed to only speak with I feel, and it it does. And I've said this before. The book you start go, you go, I have to live like a goddamn handmaid. And the truth is yes, but not forever, just until you get the guy and then he dies and then you get to go back to the way you were. But at first, yeah, you got to do all these rules. But what you do learn is like you you're you're actually because Noah, we batted up against this a lot with this book of like we have now we have to we have to dress sexy for men, and we have to wear uncomfortable clothes so that they look at our bodies and think of us sexually and then we can have sex with them. And then we also have to always speak with our feelings, and we can't ever tell them what we think, even if we know what what's better. We have to just go, what do you think I should eat for dinner? And then they tell us and you go, oh, I feel like that's a good idea, and it's just like, oh, God. But the thing is it actually honors what you how you want to be. It taught us how to set boundaries. Yes, yes, and those are very hard to sundaries. Uh yeah, it is. That's being able to go this is what I want and if you can't do it by also like, but isn't annoying to have to like second guess everything you're doing instead of just it's a map for us, it's not. It's helping us, not second guess. Yes, exactly. It's knowing that if you want what you want, like you know, I'm and make I'm building my whole special around this book and teaching women too, because I just always thought that if someone, if a guy, especially guy that you like and want to like you, or anyone that you want to like you, if you if they ask you for something and you give it to them, they'll like you more like that's the That's what you would think would happen, right, But then I learned that, honestly, people, I tend to like people who stand up for themselves and who who can And I'm not gonna because I'm always scared that Noah, you'll ask for something, ILL be like, I'm sorry, and I don't want to. Let's say you were like, want my Zevia is the last one, and you know how I feel about these, okay, and I just I'm like, no, sorry, it's the last one. My fear is that you're like Nicky's such a fucking bitch and I don't want to be friends with her anymore. She wouldn't share Zevia, but instead, like what you might think is she just knows what she wants and she can say I don't want to stay in a way that's like you would ask for this. It's just like, no, I really like this, Noah, and it's like very important to me, and I'm sorry, I'll go buy you another one, Like I don't have to give this to you, because if I give it to you, I'm secretly going to resent you for asking for this thing that I actually know that you know I want. And I didn't know that worked with sex. So I feel like, if I ever have a daughter, I'll drown her and wait for a son. But if I am forced to then have a daughter, uh, she'll name r Zevia. No. I feel like the sex talk I'll give my daughter is you know, don't ever do anything you don't want to do, which I think men go, bu why would a girl do think she doesn't want to do? You don't want understand we're conditioned in society to just be people pleasers, even the ones that are like someone like me who people go, wow, you're so confident and badass. It doesn't mean we've been manipulated by people. Were just you know, guys want to have sex, and so if we want to, like, if we like a guy, we want to just like give him what he wants. That's why when my mom used to say to me, Nick, save your sex, save it, I never knew what that. It was a weird way to say what you meant, but save it, Nick, don't give away your sex. Just saying don't give away your your sex is weird because it just yeah, you go, don't give away your sex. Me and Sabrina Jolisee, who's my good friend, we couldn't get over that, that um words of wisdom you gave us. And I remember at the time being like, but I like sex. Mom, you're a prude. You don't like sex. It's easy for you. The thing is you like a good banging, right, Dad, you enjoyed just as much as the rest. But what but you learn to respect yourself and say, listen, I'm not going to get that to you until you, like, you know, prove to me that you that you take out the garbage. And she's still waiting for that. Dad. Yeah, I mean it's a little bit of a tangent. But the funniest thing was I try to I really try to live by this in my life of like communicated with feelings more than think because I don't even like to boss a guy around and be like I think you should do this. I'm really careful about that because that's something that I do in my business life and in a relationship. I don't want to be that. And I know, well what try to bring it. Glad you had fun with that. I don't understand what you were saying. No, no, no, it didn't. Um no, I was. My feet feel great. But the problem with the think thing, I don't know if you've run into this. One time there was a guy that I was I was, you know, a guy I'm dating, and I was trying to be more in my feelings or and not ask them how they feel and more like what they think. And he had COVID and I had to write him and say, how do you feel about your COVID? How? No, I go, no, know, how do you think about your COVID? I go, because I didn't want to say how are you feeling? I almost wrote that, because that's what you write one one sick, I was like, how do you what do you think about the congestion in your chest? Like it was so hard to do it? But um, but we're married and so I am here to announce it. Um, it's it. It really is like scary to go, oh, I'm reading this book. Someone actually wrote into the show and said this a guy caught a guy that she was using the book on, as we say, which sounds bad, but she was reading this book and a guy she was dating saw the book all night and and it's a tough title. It is getting to I do it seems like a lot, especially if it's a second date. But that's why you got to cover it like a biology book in high school with her bag. Why she's still studying high school. It's just come with another cover like infinite Jess like just so intellectual. Yeah, it's it's the abridged version. Um, all right, let's get to should we take a break and then go to why do I care? All right, here's our break, Andrew, why do I care? I don't know. Why do I care? Why not throw it in? This is our celebrity news segment? Why do we care? What's going on in the news? Um? Here are the results of a survey about rich people versus normal people things. It's not. Okay, well, we've deviated from the original, trying to keep it evergreen. Okay, right, we're right, We're right, Okay, I'm sorry this, Yeah, why don't we just say Rihanna takes quiz? Okay, So the difference this is normal or rich, living in a house not an apartment? Rich or normal? I would say normal? Eating out every week? What kind of eating out we're talking about both is abnormal? I would say that is a that's a rich thing. No, I mean who's who's does? Who's five people voted? I think us weekly Who wore it best? Growing up with your own room rich? Normal? No? No, no, no no, you didn't have your own room growing up? No, and I didn't want it your own Well I did eventually when we got rich, But uh no, we didn't get rich when we would to a bigger house because my dad got a little more money. But I used to share a bedroom. I love sharing a bedroom. Upgrading your phone every year, rich or normal, that's normal because you get you get that free upgrade. Rich. I feel like this is just a guy named Rich or a guy from normal Oklahoma. These are totally arbitrary. The movies. Going to the movies, Um, no one does that anymore. Everyone's streams. Uh, well it's I think it's forty six dollars for Mathnate tickets. So rich not normal. Having a second fridge in the garage alcoholic. Um, that's like, that's grandpa. That's uh, that's normal. Okay, it is normal. Already nailed it. That was a closet one though. Okay. Going on school trips as a kid normal normal. Yeah, that's normal. Ordering an appetizer or dessert with your meal at a rest. Oh, that's rich. Owning a car. My parents convinced me that's not what we did. We never got apps, we never got ap we have Vona at home. No, we never even got that. That was Rich. Remember Vieta Oh oh, the sound of the vionet a commercial. It would be like click, click click, it would click through the layers of like hard and chocolate. It was little layers of chocolate and ice cream and be like van Netta. And it was probably like a four four dollar loaf of ice cream with like thin layers of chocolate. And the sound was so asmr would be like click click, click through all. Oh it was so good. You remember Vienida Mandy. Yeah, yeah, the clicks you get it. Yeah, it sounds like you're like when you work a Bunyon click click click back owner owning a car. Normal, rich, rich, normal, This is dumb. Yeah. This well, first of all, it makes the rich sound abnormal, which going grocery shopping with worrying about people feel bad? What going chopping for groceries without worrying about prices? Oh that's rich. Oh that's rich. It sounds like a grandmother watching a soap opera. Buying Starbucks every week? Oh every week? Yeah, normal, every day, four times a day, attics the mountain I spent on Starbucks is criminal. It's it's disgusting. I should start stealing and actually make it criminal. You could just walk in and steal I was thinking about from the mobile order. Yeah, yeah, you could if you were addicted and you had no money. You couldn't have a field. It's happened to me a couple of times. One swipe my our order and I go, well, good for them. They can learned a new drink they wouldn't have known about traveling internationally. Let's get the fan tracks traveling internationally. I hate all of this, Yes, segment where we take um, you know, we get fan letters, d M s. We have a couple of live fan tracks here in the audience, and I would love from my mother Julie Glazer to be our kind of you know audience. Uh, Mike person who does this on shows, Ricky Lake? Yeah, heyman tracks. Okay, are you having fun? Yes, of course you are. Okay, what's been your favorite part so far? Um, that's okay, okay. I don't want to put you on the spot. Um. So you are going to talk to our fans and have them ask questions and just kind of be our audience. First, I just need to go find this where we're going to ask a question. What is the question? Well, there have to find the person that's going to ask the questions. Yes, all right, here's our first question. Ask her her name? What is your name? This is Anna? Anna likes making cookies on Sundays. Anna doesn't like people telling her what she should do. Do you know that that is from Love on the Spectrum where every person I would have known, I should have known that. You should have known it. I really hope she doesn't. We're like, oh, that's the show. Yeah, yeah, sorry, that autistic thing. That was great, thank you, great, good job on that. Okay, yeah, what that wasn't it? That wasn't her question that she was? You know, I don't even know what this fan trex thing is because I don't listen to your podcast. I know you don't and I know I know thank you you show me, not to thank you for not listening. Okay, okay, all right, what is your name? Aga? Anna? Anna? I thought part of the show. Wait, why would Anna be a joke? I thought it was Anna from the show. Well, she just did an intro like people on Love on the Spectrum do so all in love in the Spectrum every time you meet someone, they're like, Michael doesn't like worms, and do it he loves the sound of lips on an apple, like they just describe. I don't even know. And she was just doing a specific thing of what she likes. What did you not like? What did you like? Again? I like, um like baking on Sundays, O my new Thanks Sunday, baking with Anna in my house. Do you like Instagram, live it or anything like? You know it really is by yourself? And then do you eat it all by Monday morning? Or are you like something? Who's good about Like? I'm like, I'll save it for the week and then I'll bring it to work and I'm like, yeah, I brought cookies and then like an hour later, I'm like, there's three left. Oh my god. Once on there were seven, but I ate them. So what do you what do you bake? Mainly cookies? My mom's not impressed, clearly she wants to know more what kind of cookies? Cookies? Good? Else? That's that is impressive? Anything else? Wait? I ask her about the So my actual fan traks. I own and operate a gourmet popcorn store in downtown Kirkwood. You love popcorn. I'm working on a vegan cheddar. Would you like that? Okay? Greg Warren comes in all the time. He's good friends with my dad. Yeah, he will bring it to like ever, when he has a show in St. Louis, he brings a tin to Yes, we've definitely had your popcorn places. Yes, And I get that away from me that like a black front of you. I'm gonna put your logo in one of the tins. I freaking love popcorn. It was like a problem do you think, like how do you feel about vegan cheddar just in general? Like would it be a good on a pie? I think you are amazing. I think I would probably have to eat it with chopsticks because that vegan cheddar does get like sticky on your fingers. Um. I am so down for it. In fact, I think what I would do with it is I would take Um, I would take like, uh, some kind of vegan yogurt and like I used to dip a spoon in yogurt. This used to be like my weird kind of antorax sick snack. But it checks out. It's legit good or sour cream, you literally fat fairy sour cream if you can find a vegan kind, dip your spoons so it covers a spoon, not a big blob, and then you dip it in the popcorn and then you eat it and it's like has the cool and the crunchy? Is that weird? In you out. Okay, so that's okay, trust me. Um yeah, I'll even take some plain like just plain butter classic classic, but we use a butter flavor so it's still kind of has a butter, but it's vegan all the things. Okay, as long as no cows were just even no cowstream or like just cursed at Yeah, okay, amazing flavor. All right, we got like popcorn. Um, someone reached out to me for it. I had just quit my job and then my dad owns a restaurant across the street from me in Kirkwood, and he's friends with this guy. And this guy was like, I'm rich his name and he's rich, and he was like, I travel internationally and have a refrigerator in his cross movies lately and he invests in little he has like he's super smart and has all these ideas and was like, I want to open a popcorn store, but I need to find someone is your dream, like Shark tank, Let's be honest, like this seems like, hey, sharks, have you ever been like tired of microwave popcorn? You have to wait for the colonels, and you gotta wait one second in between colonels who knows how long one second is. I know you don't mark wink, And then like, what's your what's different about your popcorn than like literally any other kind. Our colonels are the size of the top of this mic. That's an exaggeration, but you know they're they're big. So people come in. I mean, if you come into my store and you walk in and you say, oh wow, it smells really good in here, I'm just it's a popcorn store. Yes it smells good. You see that. We don't have a you have to go. You don't. I haven't heard that, did a bitch? And then and then they're like do you get tired of the smelling? Like I don't really smell it anymore. And then it's oh wait, no, yeah, I have an idea for popcorn. I have an idea. You know the last you know, when you used to make in the microwave and you'd have the ones that didn't fully pop, they kind of popped. Old maids were called old maids. Can you make that? We can can offender can take them out. We've got hold don't that's that's that's copyrighted by MA. We'll put it on the shelf. The Nicky Glazer popped. But can you make can you make those? How do you know? They're just in there? So whenever we dump out our kettle they fall through. We have like a table that it falls falls through some underneath. We have to clean it out every day and they just are full of them buttered popcorn, jellybelly. Yeah, yourn like I'm combined, you know, just like, why do you feel about the jelly belly flat of her butter popcorn? What? That's the thing, jellybelly flavor? Y'all know, right, it's the one you avoid. Yeah, it's so gross. Yeah, but jelly be Okay, I'm thinking I don't know what I was thinking. Your question. My question was would be to speak and cheddar popcorn? So yes it would. I'm sorry. I'm sorry I came off rude. I didn't mean for it to come up rude. I really didn't. I just was hoping there. Well, are you going to invest? Yeah? Are you going to Are you going to pay me for the massages? And I'll give her a seven hundred? Yes, I will totally take some of your popcorn? Thank you? Yeah, no, I can't wait. Where's it? Kirkwin Um? Yeah right, on Kirkwood Road, like kind of near the train station Kirkwood Popco. Sweet. All right, thank you so much. Anna? Right Anna, we're going the real name? All right? You got another fan tracks right every here? Thank you. I'm pretty sure it's right back here. Lauren. Uh, what's my question? What is your what's your what's your question? You just have to put that, Just go just ask her name? You know? Hi? Thank you do. My sister's name is Lauren. Go ahead, Laura. Okay, I knew it to do. It's call time. We have a couple of cause, oh my god, you know what? Because right mom, what's came here? Mom? I just want you to describe what because because I don't I do know what? This is You and your girlfriends in high school, your girlfriends, no, no, no, whoever, was like trying to act cool and you guys would go, oh, that's caul. Yes. So the definition is when you're doing something to look cool so that other people see it, and it's something you wouldn't do alone. That's kind of what really makes it stand out. And you just say to someone kid, and it's a way to insult them without them knowing that you really are, but they feel it because you go kid, yeah, and it's just it's good. So we love our collection of kids. We do. So what do you got for us? Horn? Okay? So the night before people get married, when guys or girls say, oh, it's your last night as a freeman, like it's so because it's not true they're gonna get divorced. It's like, get at it here, it's your last night as a freeman for a couple of years. Yeah, oh yeah, I'm good luck to you guys. Um. There's so many things involved with weddings that are his favorite thing is when a guy goes, this is the woman I've been I looked for this woman for thirty five years and he's thirty five years old. It's like, were you like a horny one year old, like toddling around like where's my wife? Give it? Like maybe start when you were like fifteen. I don't know when you start looking for but thirty five years you did not come out of your bloom being like where my bitches at? Like it's so weird to say, like I've been on the lookout for five Wait, what are y'all getting married next? Me? Okay time, Yeah, that's great. Plenty of last night's Okay, what else? What? Wait? What else we got? I'm Alice, so um, Laura and I both listen to the podcast every single day and we always talk about different moments. So one that it's been coming up a lot is just on Instagram. People take the most universal likes, things like dogs and coffee and make it their entire identity. It's very it's terrible things that everyone likes and it's you know what it is? And I got this from my ex boyfriend over there, Chris. He used to say it's white people because we don't have any call sure, and so we look for identity. We can't be like, oh it's like the Homeland, or like oh our struggle like we've had none, So we're like coffee and like just like whiskey and tacos. Right, isn't that we have no culture and so we look for identity and things everyone likes. Stop saying that your hobbies are whiskey and tacos. Those are nouns. They aren't even adjectives or verbs, is what I meant. It's so annoying. It gets me so mad when people are girls, Um, what else I saw? I mean, you seek all the time but you know, we talked about it, the car revving, but like I I won't even I'll just go care like like I'll just hear it. I won't even see the car. I'll just hear the rev I'm in bed and I hear it. I just hear. I just go by myself. I know. It becomes so therapeutic and almost you can't help yourself saying I could my canker source the other day, like I bumped them and it hurt and I was like kid because I thought they were gone and they were like, we're not, bitch, and I was like, yeah, like you're coming back. I could everything. It's so fun. Yeah, I could have water, did it? I drink water today for the first time. Oh my god, congratulations. Yeah. And I swallowed it. I swear to god, I said. I didn't say could out loud, but I go water like I haven't Like I was on an island and I haven't had water, Like yeah, so good. Um. It was at the hotel I stayed at in l A. Because the mini fridge everything I couldn't open, Like you could not open it no matter what. I gave it to a bunch of people that came over and I was like, you try this, and they were all women like doing my hair and makeup, but we could not get it open. So I had to use the tap and I said water. Yeah. I definitely was like gross, but I just I don't drink water either. I'm over being hating myself for not drinking water. Final thought, like I can't. I used to get up in the morning in New York and I used to chug water until I was sick. And that's when I knew, Okay, I'm getting enough water and then I can just like forget about it for the day because my day. I'm just not someone who's like I just love my knowledge and it's always with me and like I prefer water. Actually, like whole personality is the uh the recycled water cup thing that they bring around. Those things drop in an airport. It sounds like gunfire. It's terrifying. Oh my god. Yesterday, I don't mean to get weird, but um, yesterday I was on a TV set and uh, this is dispertinent. It was. Yeah, there were tents everywhere, dude, and you know I was just hanging out with like will I Am and I yeah, black eyed peas getting started, Um, yeah, so he end up being really nice. Anyway, I was intimidated by him at first. It was my goal because me and my friend a meal one we were going to the show in Milwaukee the other night and in the uber we heard I Got a feeling tonight It's gonna be a good night, and we both were laughing about how that would be the funniest song to kill yourself too, like and like, there's in the history of people committing suicide, there's had to have been like tonight, It's gonna be a good good nd feeling, don't worry, be happy now, Yeah, I gotta tap the list. And my goal was to tell him that and record it for a meal, just to have that like to like because whatever happens, if he's like, what the funk, that's funny because I've shared it with someone. And if he laughs, then that's even better. And I never got around to it, but um, I did do an impression of Halsey that made him like me. It's like at first he was a little bit and I shared this on the podcast today, but you guys are getting it again. Um I we were hanging backstage and he doesn't know who I am. I introduced myself to him and because he was like, where are you from? And I'm like saying, I live in St. Louis and he's like, oh my god, wow, and I go um, and I'm just like I go, uh, I'm I'm a comedian. And he was like, oh cool, okay, okay cool. And so later on, like you know, fifteen minutes later, he goes, so we're in Canada, and I go, I know, I'm from St. Louis and he goes, you, you said you were a Canadian. I go, no, oh my, oh my god, a comedian? What you think. I was just like and I'm I'm a Canadian. And he thought I was a stand up Canadian and I was like, it's much worse than that, um and uh. But he he was like a little bit. You know these guys when when you meet super famous people, it takes a second to win them over. They're kind of like, m I don't know, and then you do one funny thing and they go, oh, okay, now I'm comfortable and thank god. We were talking about different singing voices and they were all talking about how the new voice is just the the vocal fry. They're all every woman just sounds like this, like Billie Eilish and like even Ariana Grande. I didn't really understand what they were saying. I'm like, pretty Spears was the first person. Yeah, adell Um and I go, what about wind girls saying like this and their little babies and they want to get changed? What if they want their papa and they're stuck in the crib And it was like, hilarious those are you a Canadian? And uh? But he really liked it, and it was just like so nice to cut through just to have one thing that I was like, I got him. And then afterwards he was like, you're really You're really fast, like you really quit like he said it later on when we were in this weird dunk truth and I felt so good. It was so nice. So that's just a brag and uh. But but it wasn't even fast. I was just ducking like a baby and singing the healthy and um. But my point was we were on set and I don't even know if you guys are going to be in the same mental space that I was when this happened, But so okay, so there was this one game you can get there. So we were in this one game where you they play a song backwards and if you know what it is, you have to like stop your foot on this thing, and it like it flings a microphone like an air pressure goes through a tube and flings this kind of rubber microphone and you catch the microphone and you answer the thing, which at one point it was really funny because Will I Am was my team partner and I Am not wanted to be like, well, no, that's the wrong answer. I was just like, you go, Will. So we were losing very badly because he would like think he knew it, like one time it was very clearly hey, and I was and he stopped it, and I was like, yes, finally we got one because Darren Chris was cleaning up and finally we were like we got one. And he just holds right and he goes bombs over motherfucking bad dad, and I was like, yo, you were like I feel like it's it's so funny, but just the confidence of like, oh, my motherfucker, I'm the guy who hasn't been told no ah. So anyway he was. He was honestly not like I would think most celebrities to be. And I hate to be one of those people like he's different. You guys, he was cool because he was nice to me. But honestly, that's the only criteria need for that statement. So but at one point I hit the thing or someone hit the thing and the mike or no one, no one hit it, and the mic just came out right like out of nowhere, or it would like and the director of the show you could hear like the voice of God. They were like they were on the mic, like okay, moving on to the next scene, she just goes, oh, misfire on set, Oh boy, And it was just and I just go and everyone felt it, but no one could say anything. And it was just like this. It's it's been this weird thing where no one's make it's not we're not doing jokes obviously not yet. Yes, um, there will come time. I'm not about to. It is very interesting, what I mean, I've written so many If anyone ever racks into my phone, it will cancel me so badly, because how do does want to handle tragic events? You make jokes, especially about someone you already roasted, you know, like it's like I you know, I was, I was, I was making That's that's what we do. So yeah, if I get hacked, I'm really going down. But I got some nudes in there that will save me. Um. I think the nudes are gonna be so bad that are gonna you know what that already Yeah, she already canceled her own breasts. You know, I'm not even kidding you. I just closed my thighs and I heard my mom's voice say, just getting from my vagina. Al Right, Well, we gotta close out of the show. Thank you guys so much for being here. This has been an amazing live podcast. I think we'll probably do it again. I hope you had fun. Thank you so much for listening to the show and for your questions. Thank you Noah for making this happen. Thank you Joe's Cafe, Thank you am Her, and as always, don't be cap and jacky Okay, I did Jack love today. I think that it doesn't matter. I feel