WEBVTT
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This is pet Life Radio. Let's Talk pets.
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Hello, feline friends, Welcome to Katatude. I'm your show host,
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Michelle Burn and today I have an amazing author who's
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going to share her book with us, and I am
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just very excited to have her on. It's a memoir
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and I think all of us with cats can relate
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to this book. We'll be right back.
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Cats may have nine lives, but what if we could
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give them one more? That's the mission behind that Give
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Them Ten movement from spee and neuter to adoption, fostering
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and helping community cats thrive. Give Them Ten is working
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to give cat the chance at at healthier future. Together
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we can help give cats the life they deserve. Learn more.
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Meet Scooter the Neoter Cat, and join the movement at
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Give Them ten dot org.
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Let's talk pets on Petlifradio dot com.
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Welcome back everyone. I'd like to welcome Louise Watts. She
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is the author of Slow Blink, a memoir. Louise, welcome
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the cautitude.
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Thanks so much, Michelle. That was a lovely introduction.
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Well, it's lovely to have you. I love your accent,
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so you're worldly. So we were talking a bit before
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the show, you're Australian, you're based in Portugal, you've lived
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in the US. Do you find cats different in places
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you've lived or they're pretty much all the same.
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You know, here in Portugal, well, particularly Lisbon where I live,
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you never see them on the streets. They're indoors. And
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probably the reason they're not on the streets so because
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the streets are crazy, the traffic is crazy, the streets
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are tiny and windy and cobblestones, so you know, presumably
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people keep them indoors because they're safest. Whereas in the US,
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of course they lived in Colorado, cats were indoor, outdoor
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in the winter, mostly indoor. In Australia it's quite different
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now because cats have decimated our bird life and Australians
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are very into their environment now wildlife and now flora
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and faunath So there are rules now about keeping your
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cats indoors, and if they're outdoors, they need to wear
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a bell around their neck so that they alert the
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birds that they're coming, which you know, I think I
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think is a good thing.
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You need to love that a goosebumps didn't know Australia
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are so just did something. I think they stopped declining
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nationwide or they did something nationwide, but I can't recall
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what it is.
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You mean regarding cats.
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Yes, you know, I don't know.
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Michelle, but the one thing I'm very aware of is
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the bells around next and the preference is that you
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keep your cats in doors.
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I agree. I agree. I live in a warm climate
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and my cats are indoors. They have a cadio, but
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they could decide if they want to go in or out.
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In some areas that's more rural, yeah, they could be outside.
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But mostly I say keep them indoors. Okay, Yeah, so
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let's talk about slow blink. Okay, first, I'm so curious
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what made you decide to write the memoir? What inspired you?
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It sat with me for thirty five years, this story
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because it happened when I was probably around thirty I'm
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sixty six now, when I was nearly married, living in
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Boulder and color and this stray cat lived on the
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premises of the townhouse complex where we lived. And the
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story really happened over the course of about a year,
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and it was quite extraordinary for me. And I'll fast
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forward and say that it was quite magical, mystical, otherworldly.
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Several of the experiences I had with this, with this
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feral cat, so much so that when I shared some
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of the things that had happened, people didn't believe me.
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And when people don't believe you about mystical experiences that
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you have, you tend to sort of shut down or
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keep quiet about it, particularly back then that was nineteen
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the late eighties, I think the late eighties, and as
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a young person, as a thirty year old, perhaps I
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still didn't have the kind of all the voice that
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I have now, and so I just shuddered away. I
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put the story away, the whole experience away. I did
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actually initially write it on little Q cards, because that's
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sort of what you did in those days as a writer.
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If you had ideas, you journaled them or you put
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them on que cards. And I kept those que cards
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for years, even moving countries, and then finally at some
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point I let them go. I let those que cards go,
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but the story never left me. And I moved apartments
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two and a half years ago. I used to live
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out on the coast, and I decided, well, I'm going
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to move into Lisbon and have a city experience. And
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when I did that, I wasn't particularly comfortable in the
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apartment in which I moved to. So I thought, I
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really have to get into a creative project. I've got
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to do some writing because that's what I tend to do.
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And the story came back to me. And as happens,
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I think sometimes just synchronous events occur and you feel compelled,
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you pull off and experience perhaps that you put away
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and do something with it. And that's what happened. Was
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actually a movie I saw. It was the twenty twenty
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five animated movie that won the Academy Award called Flow,
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and it was about a black cat that goes through
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some pretty harrowing experiences and because of its cross species
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connections with other animals, it manages to survive a cataclysm.
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And it was almost like I was seeing Archie, this
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stray cat that had come into my life thirty five
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years ago, on the big screen. And so that was
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the synchronous event. Yeah. I came out of the movie
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theater thinking it's time to write the story. So I
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just sat down and I wrote it in about six months.
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That is quite a story about your story. Wow. Yeah,
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I think times have changed. I don't know if times
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have changed. I'm one of these people that I think
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things happen sometimes that are unexplainable and coming from I
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have my definitely have my left brain experience because I
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have two business degrees, so you am. You know, in
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grad school we actually had a class about a shaman
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and crystals because you need to sometimes think differently than
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you do. You know, you have to think open your mind,
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and I think that's one thing cats do to us.
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They make us open our mind. We don't have a choice.
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With dogs, you don't have to be I don't think
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and I'm a dog person too, I'm both. But you know,
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dogs friendly pet on the nothing's gonna happen. Cats you
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have to know them, yes, have that understanding with them.
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You have to get them. Tell us about the straight
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black cat that is the hero of the story.
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Okay, Well, as I said, he appeared in the town
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home complex where my husband and I lived, and he
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was probably about two years old at this point. He
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was in pretty good condition. He was living out of
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the dumpster. Boss him and when I would come home
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from work, I would approach her and approach him. He
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wasn't He was very skittish, so he would sort of
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run off, but I would always just say Hi kitty,
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and I was always curious about where he was from.
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Perhaps he lived close by, but increasingly I was aware
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that he was always around the dumpster in the town
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home complex. But there was a day when I was
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upstairs working from home, and we had a balcony that
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was abutting the upstairs one of the upstairs bedrooms, and
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I was just at my desk, working away, and suddenly
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there he was staring at me through the sliding glass door,
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and I stared back at him, and we had this
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moment where I realized he was just as curious about
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me as I was about him. He was watching me,
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and you know, I felt that he had sensed where
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I was in the apartment because he had to climb
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an apple tree in our front yard to get up
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and jump over the balcony railing to be able to
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stare in that glass door. And this was the this
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was our first kind of close encounter. So that was
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the beginning. That was the beginning of something.
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Yes, and that's that's unusual for a feral cat. Having
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had two very unusual Let's talk about the title. So
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the title slow Blink has a special meaning. Can you
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share that with our audience? Because not everybody knows about
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cats and blinking.
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Really really well. That's interesting because back then I didn't either.
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Of course, there was no internet, but I was very
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aware that this cat would communicate with me lea slow blinks. So,
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for instance, I was very chatty with him always in
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order to try and you know, filled some kind of
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friendship with him. He still wouldn't let me get close,
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so I would sort of just talk to him.
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Did you know that cats? And I've heard this a
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few times, so if I'm wrong, someone will send me
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an email. But I've heard numerous places that when cats
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me out, it's not so much for other cats, it's
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for the humans. Yes, yes, so when you stay talking
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to your cat, I said, yeah, it makes perfect sense,
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because that's how they don't really mew for other cats.
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It's for I mean, maybe in fights or something, but
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that'll be more of a yal, But mostly when they're
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mewing or telling us doing something, that's to tell us
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do something for me whatever they're you know, willing to
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figure out what they're doing.
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Yes, And I've actually since learned. Actually writing the book,
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I did a little bit more research about feline communication
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and feral cats don't me ow. They don't tend to
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me out. They learn it from people. So you know,
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once they become more domesticated, if you like, perhaps they're
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spending more time with us and we're communicating with them
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and talking. That is one of the ways they begin
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to communicate with us. They meow, and of course they
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do tell us in their meowing what it is that
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they want. But the slow blink is similar. And again
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I didn't know that this was part of feline communication
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back then, but when I would chat away to Archie,
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he would perhaps sit and he would just do this
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very slow blink was almost as though it was a
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blink in slow motion, and it was always so endearing.
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It was just so sweet. And I've since learned that
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feline behaviorist animal behaviorists understand this slow blinking as the
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cat's way or their gesture of showing the trust and love.
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So that's just so beautiful.
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Yes, I think it is too. When I first found
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that out. My most stoic cat is Molly, so I
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would look at her and tried doing blinks. Sometimes she
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all blink back. It depends on the mood. It's worth
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getting better we know each other. After ten years a
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little better than we used to. Let's talk about also, now,
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this barrel cat is black. I had shows on black cats,
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several shows. I've heard about the Black Velvet Club, which
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I don't know if that's just for dogs. When I adopted,
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I saw there was a picture of a dog. But
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that's for dogs, I believe, and cats, for some reason,
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they're not adopted as much. Everyone that I've adopted. All
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my dogs were black with markings. And Molly's tuxedo, well
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she adopted us. What do you think is interesting about
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this era of mystique or sometimes you know, there's a
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lot of superstitions about black cats. Did that, you know,
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deter you or have any Did you have any part
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about that when you were, you know, communicating with their
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barrel cat?
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No, not at all. I thought he was absolutely beautiful
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because his coat was just raven black and he had
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just exquisite green eyes. There's a picture of him on
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the front cover. He's looking a little bit annoyed with
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me because I was up close trying to take a
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photo of him. But this superstition around black cats I
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do find disturbing, and I do wonder if it's because
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we associate the color black with the dark, with the night, danger,
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the unknown, perhaps what lies beneath the surface of life,
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and so perhaps it's association with the deep or the
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mysterious parts of life and our existence simply yeah that
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we can't see or fully rationalize that that causes or
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generates some kind of mystique around them around black cats.
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From a cultural perspective, sort of alluded to that too.
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The black hats have been associated with the supernatural across
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many cultures. In ancient Egypt, they were revered and harming
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one was illegal. Killing a cat was punishable by death. Unbelieve.
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In the Celtic tradition, the black cat arriving at your
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home was a sign of prosperity. But in medieval Europe,
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for instance, they became associated with witchcraft and the occult.
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And I think that's one that particularly has infiltrated our
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I don't know our psyche as somewhat damaging.
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In fact, I absolutely agree we need to take a
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short break and we'll be right back.
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Talk to the par hid Amy Suing.
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Hi, I'm Jeane Lynch.
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This is Mandy Boyne.
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Hi.
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There is Caturine Pagel.
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There's only one nation that gives you the Scoop on
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Wagging Tongues, Antails and Who's Walking Hill in Rent and
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tencil down on pet Life Radio, The tail Wagger, Let's
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Talk Past.
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Let's at Life Radio, Wetline Radio.
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At life Radio dot com.
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Welcome back everyone. We're talking to Louise Watts. She is
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the author of Slow Blink, a memoir. So, Louise, I
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want to ask you about this. Your book is about
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several things. I mean, it's about loss, it's about grief.
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It's about loving something that you can't keep. I mean
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a lot of people have experienced this, and I know
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it's two different things. Grief, well maybe intertwine a little,
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and then loving something you can keep. What do you
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hope readers take away from your story that relates to
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those feelings.
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Well, I think one of the things that I kind
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of conclude the book with is this designed that love
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doesn't end when letting go begins. It simply changes form.
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And the grief is not linear. It doesn't follow a
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tidy arc from loss to acceptance. It circles back, as
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in my case, it ambushes you years later, and it
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hides inside other losses, which I think I sort of
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try and weave that through this story. You know, writing
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Slow Blink thirty five years after Archie died, taught me
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that grief has its own timing and that unprocessed grief
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waits until we're ready to process it to meet it. Also,
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animals give us permission to grieve. There's still a cultural
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tendency to minimize the loss of an animal. It was
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just a cat, which I know some people have thought
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when I have shared something of archie story with them,
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and this kind of really feels or leaves you feeling
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isolated in your grief. And I hope Slow Blink gives
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read permission to take their grief seriously and to honor
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the depth of what they felt the connection they had
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with their kiddy, because the bond was real and the
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loss is real. So I suppose I hope readers take
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away that your grief for your cat is not small,
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it's not embarrassing. It's the resonance of something profound that
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happened between two creatures some very different worlds who sound
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each other.
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That's an amazing way to put it. That's how I
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got amazing. Now, did you adopt other cats after Archie?
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You know, Michelle, I didn't. This also might sound I
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don't know odd or not bizarre, but I loved him
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so much, so profoundly, that when I lost him, I
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thought I could never never have another cat. The pain
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was just too great, and he was soul and so unusual,
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and the experience was so otherworldly. I felt it surpassed
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what I could ever give another cat. Now something is shifting.
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I mean, thirty five years later, a lot has happened,
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and I still have a sense that our chie is
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around me, and I do think one day, yes, I'll
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open my heart to another cat, because every now and
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then I encounter friends cats and I just love them
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so much. I think, Oh, I think I'm almost ready
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for another one.
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Well, we each have our time, you know, we we do.
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We do some people, you know, we need to adopt
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right away. Some people just can never do another. That's
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their cats, all made for life. Yeah, I don't know.
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Mine find me, So I don't know what to say
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about that one.
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Well, they do. I think that's one of the mysterious
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things about cats is that they find us.
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Why do you think they do that? Is it food?
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Like?
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How do the cats? I live in a warm climate,
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so there are sometimes other cats and so forth. I
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wonder how they know this is the house that will
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feed you when there's just a we do have a
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water fountain outside just for cats. Is that the giveaway?
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Do they just know who to go to?
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No? I think that there might be something to that,
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and of course the rational side of me always feels like, oh,
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they're very much food driven. And as I understand it,
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cats came out of Africa, that domestic cats are still
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genetically are very much connected to wild cats of Africa,
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and as communities and civilizations encroached on their space, they
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sort of lived at the periphery, and of course living
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on the periphery of villages, towns, cities that had access
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to food. So it may well have been very food driven.
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But of course, as all your listeners will know who
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have cats, they're very independent and they have maintained that
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sort of I don't know, African war wildness about them,
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that African wild cap quality about them in their independence,
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and so yes, perhaps there's an element of them being
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food driven. But I think also over eons they've learned
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that human companionship probably offers them more than food, and
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I don't know what that is because there's something very
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unknowable about cats again, and coming back to this idea,
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there's something quite mysterious about them. I seem to sort
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of observe and watch us, but from a very detached place,
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unless they're ready to be stroked or comforted.
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Yes, in a way, I think that's smart, their way
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of saying, leave me alone when they want you, I'll
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let me know, let you know, I'll know exactly. That's
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actually smart. Too bad that you're humans. We can really
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do that sometimes. So what do you hope that readers
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when they read Slow Blink take away from your book?
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I really do think it's as simple as love person,
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even when we must let go, there's solace in this
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persistence of having loved. However fleeting and how ever inexplicable
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that connection is. It doesn't die with with the body.
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It continues, and so in times of loss, I think
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we can draw on that, and I think that that's
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what I wish for for readers of Slow Blink.
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And what would you tell readers that read your book
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and listening to you thinking about adopting a cat? You
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know some people can hear how you know about you know,
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with everything, there's joy and grief, there's there's happy. You
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know there's contrasts. So for somebody reading and listening to
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you saying, oh, I want to adopt a cat, but
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it'll be hard if something happens, or you know, what
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would you say to those listeners, Oh gosh.
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I think if you're drawn to caring for an animal,
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go to a shelter, visit with the cats, see if
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there's a particular cat that you're drawn to that's drawn
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to you. I think, make genuine inquiries at the shelter
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about what's involved in caring for a shelter cat, because
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oftentimes I can be traumatized. They might have been abandoned,
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they might have been abused, and there's a responsibility in
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caring for a cap from a shelter. And I think, personally,
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this is just my personal feeling that it's important that
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we understand the responsibility of care, and so I think
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just make inquiries. Open your heart and make inquiries. Go
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to a shelter and investigate.
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Thank you so much, Luis. Where can our listeners find
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your book Slow Blink a memoir?
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It is on Amazon That is actually the only place
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that it's available for purchase. So you would just go
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to Amazon and put in slow Blink a memoir by
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Louise Ross, and it's all so available long kindle. So
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that's the soft cover, all the paperback and the kindle version.
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Okay, thank you so much again for coming on Catitude
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and sharing your story with us and telling us more
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about Slow Blink a Memoir.
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Thank you so much, Michelle.
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I hope everyone enjoyed the book again. It is called
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slow Blink, a Memoir by Louise Ross. Thank you for
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listening to our show today. I want to thank my
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cat crew, Dennis, Charlotte and Mollie who I've had slow
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blinks with all of them at one time or another,
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mostly Dennis and Mollie. Thank you to my listeners of Catatude,
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I appreciate you so much again. Thanks to my guest,
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the author Louise Ross. Thank you, of course to my
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amazing producer Mark Winter for all you do. He works
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his magic and makes every shallow sound amazing. And always remember,
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lose the attitude, have Catitude.
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Let's talk best every week on demand only on petlive
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radio dot com
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This is pet Life Radio. Let's Talk pets.
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Hello, feline friends, Welcome to Katatude. I'm your show host,
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00:00:27.239 --> 00:00:30.960
Michelle Burn and today I have an amazing author who's
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going to share her book with us, and I am
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just very excited to have her on. It's a memoir
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and I think all of us with cats can relate
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to this book. We'll be right back.
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00:00:45.000 --> 00:00:47.840
Cats may have nine lives, but what if we could
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00:00:47.880 --> 00:00:50.880
give them one more? That's the mission behind that Give
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Them Ten movement from spee and neuter to adoption, fostering
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and helping community cats thrive. Give Them Ten is working
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to give cat the chance at at healthier future. Together
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we can help give cats the life they deserve. Learn more.
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Meet Scooter the Neoter Cat, and join the movement at
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Give Them ten dot org.
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Let's talk pets on Petlifradio dot com.
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Welcome back everyone. I'd like to welcome Louise Watts. She
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is the author of Slow Blink, a memoir. Louise, welcome
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the cautitude.
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Thanks so much, Michelle. That was a lovely introduction.
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Well, it's lovely to have you. I love your accent,
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so you're worldly. So we were talking a bit before
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the show, you're Australian, you're based in Portugal, you've lived
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in the US. Do you find cats different in places
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you've lived or they're pretty much all the same.
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You know, here in Portugal, well, particularly Lisbon where I live,
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you never see them on the streets. They're indoors. And
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probably the reason they're not on the streets so because
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the streets are crazy, the traffic is crazy, the streets
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are tiny and windy and cobblestones, so you know, presumably
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people keep them indoors because they're safest. Whereas in the US,
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of course they lived in Colorado, cats were indoor, outdoor
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in the winter, mostly indoor. In Australia it's quite different
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now because cats have decimated our bird life and Australians
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are very into their environment now wildlife and now flora
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and faunath So there are rules now about keeping your
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cats indoors, and if they're outdoors, they need to wear
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a bell around their neck so that they alert the
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birds that they're coming, which you know, I think I
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think is a good thing.
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You need to love that a goosebumps didn't know Australia
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are so just did something. I think they stopped declining
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nationwide or they did something nationwide, but I can't recall
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what it is.
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You mean regarding cats.
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Yes, you know, I don't know.
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Michelle, but the one thing I'm very aware of is
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the bells around next and the preference is that you
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keep your cats in doors.
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I agree. I agree. I live in a warm climate
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and my cats are indoors. They have a cadio, but
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they could decide if they want to go in or out.
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In some areas that's more rural, yeah, they could be outside.
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But mostly I say keep them indoors. Okay, Yeah, so
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let's talk about slow blink. Okay, first, I'm so curious
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what made you decide to write the memoir? What inspired you?
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It sat with me for thirty five years, this story
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because it happened when I was probably around thirty I'm
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sixty six now, when I was nearly married, living in
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Boulder and color and this stray cat lived on the
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premises of the townhouse complex where we lived. And the
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story really happened over the course of about a year,
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and it was quite extraordinary for me. And I'll fast
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forward and say that it was quite magical, mystical, otherworldly.
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Several of the experiences I had with this, with this
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feral cat, so much so that when I shared some
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of the things that had happened, people didn't believe me.
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And when people don't believe you about mystical experiences that
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you have, you tend to sort of shut down or
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keep quiet about it, particularly back then that was nineteen
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the late eighties, I think the late eighties, and as
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a young person, as a thirty year old, perhaps I
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still didn't have the kind of all the voice that
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I have now, and so I just shuddered away. I
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put the story away, the whole experience away. I did
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actually initially write it on little Q cards, because that's
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sort of what you did in those days as a writer.
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If you had ideas, you journaled them or you put
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them on que cards. And I kept those que cards
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for years, even moving countries, and then finally at some
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point I let them go. I let those que cards go,
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but the story never left me. And I moved apartments
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two and a half years ago. I used to live
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out on the coast, and I decided, well, I'm going
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to move into Lisbon and have a city experience. And
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when I did that, I wasn't particularly comfortable in the
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apartment in which I moved to. So I thought, I
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really have to get into a creative project. I've got
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to do some writing because that's what I tend to do.
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And the story came back to me. And as happens,
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I think sometimes just synchronous events occur and you feel compelled,
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you pull off and experience perhaps that you put away
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and do something with it. And that's what happened. Was
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actually a movie I saw. It was the twenty twenty
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five animated movie that won the Academy Award called Flow,
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and it was about a black cat that goes through
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some pretty harrowing experiences and because of its cross species
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connections with other animals, it manages to survive a cataclysm.
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And it was almost like I was seeing Archie, this
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stray cat that had come into my life thirty five
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years ago, on the big screen. And so that was
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the synchronous event. Yeah. I came out of the movie
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theater thinking it's time to write the story. So I
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just sat down and I wrote it in about six months.
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That is quite a story about your story. Wow. Yeah,
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I think times have changed. I don't know if times
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have changed. I'm one of these people that I think
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things happen sometimes that are unexplainable and coming from I
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have my definitely have my left brain experience because I
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have two business degrees, so you am. You know, in
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grad school we actually had a class about a shaman
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and crystals because you need to sometimes think differently than
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you do. You know, you have to think open your mind,
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and I think that's one thing cats do to us.
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They make us open our mind. We don't have a choice.
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With dogs, you don't have to be I don't think
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and I'm a dog person too, I'm both. But you know,
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dogs friendly pet on the nothing's gonna happen. Cats you
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have to know them, yes, have that understanding with them.
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You have to get them. Tell us about the straight
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black cat that is the hero of the story.
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Okay, Well, as I said, he appeared in the town
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home complex where my husband and I lived, and he
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was probably about two years old at this point. He
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was in pretty good condition. He was living out of
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the dumpster. Boss him and when I would come home
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from work, I would approach her and approach him. He
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wasn't He was very skittish, so he would sort of
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run off, but I would always just say Hi kitty,
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and I was always curious about where he was from.
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Perhaps he lived close by, but increasingly I was aware
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that he was always around the dumpster in the town
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home complex. But there was a day when I was
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upstairs working from home, and we had a balcony that
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was abutting the upstairs one of the upstairs bedrooms, and
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I was just at my desk, working away, and suddenly
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there he was staring at me through the sliding glass door,
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and I stared back at him, and we had this
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moment where I realized he was just as curious about
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me as I was about him. He was watching me,
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and you know, I felt that he had sensed where
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I was in the apartment because he had to climb
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an apple tree in our front yard to get up
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and jump over the balcony railing to be able to
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stare in that glass door. And this was the this
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was our first kind of close encounter. So that was
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the beginning. That was the beginning of something.
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Yes, and that's that's unusual for a feral cat. Having
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had two very unusual Let's talk about the title. So
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the title slow Blink has a special meaning. Can you
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share that with our audience? Because not everybody knows about
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cats and blinking.
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Really really well. That's interesting because back then I didn't either.
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Of course, there was no internet, but I was very
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aware that this cat would communicate with me lea slow blinks. So,
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for instance, I was very chatty with him always in
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order to try and you know, filled some kind of
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friendship with him. He still wouldn't let me get close,
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so I would sort of just talk to him.
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Did you know that cats? And I've heard this a
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few times, so if I'm wrong, someone will send me
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an email. But I've heard numerous places that when cats
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me out, it's not so much for other cats, it's
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for the humans. Yes, yes, so when you stay talking
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to your cat, I said, yeah, it makes perfect sense,
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because that's how they don't really mew for other cats.
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It's for I mean, maybe in fights or something, but
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that'll be more of a yal, But mostly when they're
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mewing or telling us doing something, that's to tell us
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do something for me whatever they're you know, willing to
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figure out what they're doing.
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Yes, And I've actually since learned. Actually writing the book,
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I did a little bit more research about feline communication
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and feral cats don't me ow. They don't tend to
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me out. They learn it from people. So you know,
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once they become more domesticated, if you like, perhaps they're
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spending more time with us and we're communicating with them
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and talking. That is one of the ways they begin
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to communicate with us. They meow, and of course they
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do tell us in their meowing what it is that
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they want. But the slow blink is similar. And again
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I didn't know that this was part of feline communication
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back then, but when I would chat away to Archie,
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he would perhaps sit and he would just do this
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very slow blink was almost as though it was a
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blink in slow motion, and it was always so endearing.
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It was just so sweet. And I've since learned that
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feline behaviorist animal behaviorists understand this slow blinking as the
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cat's way or their gesture of showing the trust and love.
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So that's just so beautiful.
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Yes, I think it is too. When I first found
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that out. My most stoic cat is Molly, so I
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would look at her and tried doing blinks. Sometimes she
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all blink back. It depends on the mood. It's worth
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getting better we know each other. After ten years a
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little better than we used to. Let's talk about also, now,
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this barrel cat is black. I had shows on black cats,
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several shows. I've heard about the Black Velvet Club, which
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I don't know if that's just for dogs. When I adopted,
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I saw there was a picture of a dog. But
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that's for dogs, I believe, and cats, for some reason,
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they're not adopted as much. Everyone that I've adopted. All
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my dogs were black with markings. And Molly's tuxedo, well
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she adopted us. What do you think is interesting about
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this era of mystique or sometimes you know, there's a
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lot of superstitions about black cats. Did that, you know,
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deter you or have any Did you have any part
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about that when you were, you know, communicating with their
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barrel cat?
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No, not at all. I thought he was absolutely beautiful
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because his coat was just raven black and he had
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just exquisite green eyes. There's a picture of him on
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the front cover. He's looking a little bit annoyed with
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me because I was up close trying to take a
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photo of him. But this superstition around black cats I
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do find disturbing, and I do wonder if it's because
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we associate the color black with the dark, with the night, danger,
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the unknown, perhaps what lies beneath the surface of life,
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and so perhaps it's association with the deep or the
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mysterious parts of life and our existence simply yeah that
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we can't see or fully rationalize that that causes or
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generates some kind of mystique around them around black cats.
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From a cultural perspective, sort of alluded to that too.
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The black hats have been associated with the supernatural across
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many cultures. In ancient Egypt, they were revered and harming
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one was illegal. Killing a cat was punishable by death. Unbelieve.
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In the Celtic tradition, the black cat arriving at your
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home was a sign of prosperity. But in medieval Europe,
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for instance, they became associated with witchcraft and the occult.
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And I think that's one that particularly has infiltrated our
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I don't know our psyche as somewhat damaging.
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In fact, I absolutely agree we need to take a
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short break and we'll be right back.
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Talk to the par hid Amy Suing.
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Hi, I'm Jeane Lynch.
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This is Mandy Boyne.
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Hi.
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There is Caturine Pagel.
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There's only one nation that gives you the Scoop on
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Wagging Tongues, Antails and Who's Walking Hill in Rent and
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tencil down on pet Life Radio, The tail Wagger, Let's
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Talk Past.
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Let's at Life Radio, Wetline Radio.
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At life Radio dot com.
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Welcome back everyone. We're talking to Louise Watts. She is
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the author of Slow Blink, a memoir. So, Louise, I
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want to ask you about this. Your book is about
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several things. I mean, it's about loss, it's about grief.
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It's about loving something that you can't keep. I mean
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a lot of people have experienced this, and I know
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it's two different things. Grief, well maybe intertwine a little,
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and then loving something you can keep. What do you
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hope readers take away from your story that relates to
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those feelings.
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Well, I think one of the things that I kind
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of conclude the book with is this designed that love
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doesn't end when letting go begins. It simply changes form.
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And the grief is not linear. It doesn't follow a
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tidy arc from loss to acceptance. It circles back, as
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in my case, it ambushes you years later, and it
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hides inside other losses, which I think I sort of
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try and weave that through this story. You know, writing
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Slow Blink thirty five years after Archie died, taught me
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that grief has its own timing and that unprocessed grief
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waits until we're ready to process it to meet it. Also,
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animals give us permission to grieve. There's still a cultural
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tendency to minimize the loss of an animal. It was
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just a cat, which I know some people have thought
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when I have shared something of archie story with them,
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and this kind of really feels or leaves you feeling
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isolated in your grief. And I hope Slow Blink gives
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read permission to take their grief seriously and to honor
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the depth of what they felt the connection they had
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with their kiddy, because the bond was real and the
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loss is real. So I suppose I hope readers take
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away that your grief for your cat is not small,
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it's not embarrassing. It's the resonance of something profound that
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happened between two creatures some very different worlds who sound
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each other.
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That's an amazing way to put it. That's how I
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got amazing. Now, did you adopt other cats after Archie?
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You know, Michelle, I didn't. This also might sound I
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don't know odd or not bizarre, but I loved him
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so much, so profoundly, that when I lost him, I
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thought I could never never have another cat. The pain
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was just too great, and he was soul and so unusual,
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and the experience was so otherworldly. I felt it surpassed
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what I could ever give another cat. Now something is shifting.
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I mean, thirty five years later, a lot has happened,
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and I still have a sense that our chie is
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around me, and I do think one day, yes, I'll
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open my heart to another cat, because every now and
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then I encounter friends cats and I just love them
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so much. I think, Oh, I think I'm almost ready
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for another one.
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Well, we each have our time, you know, we we do.
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We do some people, you know, we need to adopt
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right away. Some people just can never do another. That's
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their cats, all made for life. Yeah, I don't know.
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Mine find me, So I don't know what to say
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about that one.
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Well, they do. I think that's one of the mysterious
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things about cats is that they find us.
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Why do you think they do that? Is it food?
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Like?
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How do the cats? I live in a warm climate,
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so there are sometimes other cats and so forth. I
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wonder how they know this is the house that will
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feed you when there's just a we do have a
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water fountain outside just for cats. Is that the giveaway?
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Do they just know who to go to?
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No? I think that there might be something to that,
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and of course the rational side of me always feels like, oh,
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they're very much food driven. And as I understand it,
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cats came out of Africa, that domestic cats are still
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genetically are very much connected to wild cats of Africa,
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and as communities and civilizations encroached on their space, they
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sort of lived at the periphery, and of course living
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on the periphery of villages, towns, cities that had access
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to food. So it may well have been very food driven.
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But of course, as all your listeners will know who
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have cats, they're very independent and they have maintained that
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sort of I don't know, African war wildness about them,
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that African wild cap quality about them in their independence,
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and so yes, perhaps there's an element of them being
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food driven. But I think also over eons they've learned
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that human companionship probably offers them more than food, and
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I don't know what that is because there's something very
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unknowable about cats again, and coming back to this idea,
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there's something quite mysterious about them. I seem to sort
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of observe and watch us, but from a very detached place,
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unless they're ready to be stroked or comforted.
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Yes, in a way, I think that's smart, their way
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of saying, leave me alone when they want you, I'll
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let me know, let you know, I'll know exactly. That's
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actually smart. Too bad that you're humans. We can really
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do that sometimes. So what do you hope that readers
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when they read Slow Blink take away from your book?
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I really do think it's as simple as love person,
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even when we must let go, there's solace in this
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persistence of having loved. However fleeting and how ever inexplicable
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that connection is. It doesn't die with with the body.
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It continues, and so in times of loss, I think
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we can draw on that, and I think that that's
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what I wish for for readers of Slow Blink.
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And what would you tell readers that read your book
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and listening to you thinking about adopting a cat? You
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know some people can hear how you know about you know,
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with everything, there's joy and grief, there's there's happy. You
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know there's contrasts. So for somebody reading and listening to
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you saying, oh, I want to adopt a cat, but
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it'll be hard if something happens, or you know, what
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would you say to those listeners, Oh gosh.
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I think if you're drawn to caring for an animal,
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go to a shelter, visit with the cats, see if
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there's a particular cat that you're drawn to that's drawn
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to you. I think, make genuine inquiries at the shelter
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about what's involved in caring for a shelter cat, because
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oftentimes I can be traumatized. They might have been abandoned,
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they might have been abused, and there's a responsibility in
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caring for a cap from a shelter. And I think, personally,
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this is just my personal feeling that it's important that
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we understand the responsibility of care, and so I think
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just make inquiries. Open your heart and make inquiries. Go
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to a shelter and investigate.
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Thank you so much, Luis. Where can our listeners find
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your book Slow Blink a memoir?
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It is on Amazon That is actually the only place
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that it's available for purchase. So you would just go
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to Amazon and put in slow Blink a memoir by
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Louise Ross, and it's all so available long kindle. So
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that's the soft cover, all the paperback and the kindle version.
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Okay, thank you so much again for coming on Catitude
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and sharing your story with us and telling us more
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about Slow Blink a Memoir.
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Thank you so much, Michelle.
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I hope everyone enjoyed the book again. It is called
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slow Blink, a Memoir by Louise Ross. Thank you for
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listening to our show today. I want to thank my
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cat crew, Dennis, Charlotte and Mollie who I've had slow
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blinks with all of them at one time or another,
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mostly Dennis and Mollie. Thank you to my listeners of Catatude,
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I appreciate you so much again. Thanks to my guest,
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the author Louise Ross. Thank you, of course to my
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amazing producer Mark Winter for all you do. He works
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his magic and makes every shallow sound amazing. And always remember,
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lose the attitude, have Catitude.
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Let's talk best every week on demand only on petlive
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radio dot com
