Introverts Declare

You probably know that May is Introvert Month, starting this past May. It was about time, don’t you think. It’s not that we introverts minded being ignored since forever; it’s just that we were frequently pressured to transform ourselves into extroverts. “Get out of your shell.” “Join in.” “Don’t act so depressed.” “Relax and have a little fun.” “Come to the party.” “Get over your shyness.”

Well, I hope all of that nonsense has been put to rest. We enjoy being introverts and have little to no interest in parties, social gatherings, drinking fountain gossip or just hanging out with friends and co-workers. Spending time by ourselves or maybe with one other person who does not pressure too much is our comfort zone, where life and living are at their best. We aren’t asking extroverts to change and are simply asking that they don’t pressure us to change either.

If That’s you I’m hearing with that “hurry, hurry, hurry” or “rush, rush, rush,” I’m picking up on your pressure to get to the point. I’m okay with your extrovert impatience, but it’s not going to get me to go any faster. I’m not totally immune to social pressure, but it sure doesn’t get me to stop doing things in my own good time.

Here’s the thing. I have a recommendation. But before I get to the recommendation, I need to help you with perspective.

Think about Friday. It doesn’t matter much what comes to mind for you. “Friday” is virtually guaranteed to prompt an immediate tumble of thoughts, images, and emotions from most everyone, especially the extroverts among us.

To think Saturday or Sunday is nearly as quick-and-easy for extroverts as it is to think Friday. For them, Saturday and Sunday have their own spontaneous associations and clarity. All but the very young for whom any day is its own unique adventure and the permanently bummed out for whom life itself is a burden, to think “Saturday” or “Sunday” rocks, if only in comparison to the five alternatives. Of course, Saturday and Sunday also prompt happy thoughts for us extroverts, since there are usually fewer people demanding our attention.

Think Monday or Wednesday? Definitely, at least once a week. I know, neither is up there with “Saturday” or even “Friday” or “Sunday” but Monday is when the week really starts and Wednesday, well, half-way has a little something going for it. Even if we are not particularly thrilled, Monday and Wednesday do both get our attention.

I’m getting around to my point. Think of this as a Thursday sort of thing. “Thursday” is the day reserved for getting the week wrapped up. By Thursday, we have put things off about as long as we can, and we sure don’t want to waste a perfectly good Friday on anything important or necessary. Yep, Thursday is definitely crunch time; so think Thursday. Without Thursday, we might not ever get anything finished.

That brings us to thinking about Tuesday and a serious problem. There is mostly nothing we could possibly think about Tuesday. It’s not the weekend. It’s not the start or the middle. It’s not a things have to get done day. There is no hurry since there is still plenty of the week left. If anything important ever happened on a Tuesday – and I doubt it — it was just a coincidence. Tuesday is stuck in there with no point to it.

Yes, I do know about Fat Tuesday. So what are your plans for next Fat Tuesday? – See, that’s my point. Tuesday may not be a complete cipher, but it does come close. No one ever makes special plans for a Tuesday, at least no one who inhabits my universe.

That gets me around to my recommendation. Think about Tuesday. I think Tuesday and nothing comes to mind. It’s kind of sad as I ponder it. There is poor Tuesday with no unique identity or purpose, still having to show up, week after week after week. Wouldn’t you just hate that? There is Monday dragging its feet and Wednesday leaning toward the weekend and there you are stuck in between with nothing to do, and more to the point, no one cares. It’s kind of like extroverts think about us introverts. Tuesday is the introvert of the week.

Here’s the thing. Since Tuesday doesn’t have a lot going for it anyway, why not declare Tuesday Introvert Day. It would be sort of like Saturday already is for all you extroverts. We introverts would like to have our day every week. On Tuesdays, everyone could back off all those emails and text messages along with not expecting us introverts to respond to the few we do get, at least until Wednesday, afternoon. Also, keeping our doors closed should go unchallenged. What’s more, no one much uses the telephone anyway, but if someone is tempted on Tuesday, he or she can just leave a voice mail.

I’ll bet you get the idea. Since the extroverts are undoubtedly too busy to thoughtfully consider making Tuesday Introvert Day, let’s simply declare it so. Make it effective as of last Tuesday, so no one gets confused. If someone asks you “When did that happen?” you can just respond, “It was a while back. Didn’t you get the email?”

Now you know, so there you go. Hence forth – starting a while back – Tuesday is Introvert Day. Please celebrate, by yourself, I trust.