Slowing Down, Redefining Success, And Pursuing A Long, Happy, Healthy Life (Breather Episode with Brad)

Hopefully this show will get you thinking: Can money buy happiness? (research says only to a certain, seemingly low, point), and what is success anyway? According to Merle, success feels something like this: doing work that you love and living a long, happy, and healthy life. And yeah, that money can’t buy you happiness stuff is totally true - the fact is, once you’ve been able to cover all your basic needs (food, shelter, etc), money can’t produce the same kind of feeling of happiness in you - you plateau, basically. This is because consumerism locks you in a never-ending cycle of wanting more, more, and more...and you’re never satisfied. Small choices, like opting to make coffee at home instead of going out to your local Starbucks, will seriously add up in savings over time. Not only that, but look at what it’s doing to our planet! Simply appreciate what you already have, instead of constantly trying to collect more stuff. Remember - it’s just stuff. We live in a world where the new model of something is always just around the corner. There are always updates and upgrades, always something to buy - and there’s always a company out there trying to get you to spend your money. No wonder these things cannot give you sustainable happiness - the only joy they bring is fleeting. Real happiness comes from the substantive things in life - like making connections, engaging in or building community, service for others, living with passion and purpose...

This is precisely why overworking yourself and overpacking your schedule absolutely destroys productivity and messes with your personal happiness. Research actually shows that once you’ve exceeded 50 hours of work per week, your productivity is seriously challenged. Push it to 55 hours, and your productivity basically drops off a cliff. Why? Because there’s no balance when you’re working without socialization. Social relationships are the #1 driver of happiness, so we have to work on creating, and maintaining that work-life balance. Otherwise, you’ll find your work suffers - when you’re overworked, your energy is low, your concentration is sluggish, your abilities are decreased. Who wants to work in a state where you’re barely functioning? No one can produce good work under those conditions, but unfortunately, it’s very common in our consumerist and capitalist-driven culture. No wonder the countries that rate the highest on the “happiest people” scale have an average workweek of 37 hours! And check this out: Europeans tend to vacation way more than Americans, who average only 11 days of vacation time a year. Compare that to studies that have shown 6 weeks of vacation time a year is optimal for happiness...clearly, we’ve got some catching up to do.

One radical takeaway from this piece was the statement that happiness causes success, not the other way around. First, you gotta get happy, because 1) duh, it feels good and 2) because that’s what leads to success. Yes, we’ve had the formula backwards for years, and now we know: success does not bring happiness. Success follows happiness. That’s why we have to be super mindful about balance - because no one wants to have any regrets on their deathbed about how they balanced (or didn’t!) their personal life with their career. So why not start incorporating 5 habits into your day that Merle claims will boost your happiness? These habits will effortlessly get you into a positive and happy mindset, which is the key to happiness and success because having a negative and discouraged attitude will only get in the way of you manifesting your dreams. Start doing these 5 things daily, for 21 days, and see how your life changes:

• Write down 3 things you are grateful for. 

• Journal about a recent positive experience for 2 minutes every single day.

• Engage in (not strenuous) cardio, like brisk walking or jogging.

• Meditate, even if it’s just for a few minutes each day.

• Start your day by emailing/writing a 2-minute note of gratitude/thanks to a friend or colleague, or compliment someone you admire.

The most important lesson I garnered from Merle’s writing was this: your true nature and highest calling is to promote happiness. When you think about life from that perspective, things seem simpler and easier. Is it really that simple? Nothing ever is, but the bottom line is: everyone wants to live a happy and healthy life. If your true nature and highest calling is to promote happiness, then how fun is that? Enjoy this show, and don’t forget: stay positive, remember to widen your perspective on any situation (meaning, just get over yourself), and promote happiness among your friends, family, even the people you pass on the street. A little kindness truly goes a long way, whether it’s to yourself or to others, it does matter. Every action has an impact, so why not slow down, and stop and smell the roses?

TIMESTAMPS:

What does success really mean? [03:00]

Can money buy happiness? [04:05]

It depends on the person. If you are in a position of doing for others rather than just gathering material goods, you would probably feel quite satisfied.  [07:08]

Even people with lots of money experience FOMO (fear of missing out). [09:55]

How much money would you have today, had you begun saving $5 per day at age 20? [ 12:42]

Working long hours does not equal productivity or happiness. [15:17]

Vacation time is critical. [17:49]

Social relationships are the best predictor of overall health and happiness. [20:09]

Happiness causes success.  Not the other way around. [25:39]

Make sure you are not looking back in regret at the end of your life. [27:42]

Slow down and savor life. [30:48}

Have the courage to be true to yourself no matter what other people want you to be. [33:30]

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