Self Improvement: Progress Replaced with Performance? | Social Media, Algorithms & Personal Growth

The internet promised to make self-improvement accessible to everyone. But has it instead turned it into a spectator sport - replacing process with performance, and pushing us to consume playbooks rather than actually build habits?

Welcome to Ruined By The Internet? - the show where we examine how technology is shaping modern life - whether we want it to or not.

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We're joined by Justin Leff - behavioural coach and founder of Solilium Coaching - who helps people with discipline, wellness, and self-understanding, and has seen firsthand what happens when the algorithm becomes the self-improvement plan.

In this episode we investigate how algorithms and social media have reshaped our goals and motivation, examine the danger of social comparison in a world of curated success, explore how digital overload creates decision fatigue, and ask whether AI is finally the personalised self-improvement tool we were promised - or just a more sophisticated version of the same one-size-fits-all problem.

(00:00) The Impact of the Internet on Self-Improvement

(03:12) Globalisation of Ideas and Goals

(06:07) The Dangers of Social Comparison

(09:08) The Role of Role Models in the Digital Age

(12:03) Chasing Status vs. Genuine Self-Improvement

(15:12) The Journey of Self-Discovery

(18:05) The Process Over Quick Fixes

(21:14) The Impact of Digital Overload on Motivation

(24:08) Navigating Decision Fatigue in a World of Options

(28:03) The Future of Self-Improvement Without Social Media

(30:41) AI's Role in Tailored Self-Improvement

(35:08) Finding Authentic Peer Support in Self-Improvement

(37:13) The Importance of Community in Personal Growth

Key takeaways:

• The Optimisation Trap: reading endless books, listening to podcasts, and watching motivation videos tricks the brain into feeling productive while delaying the uncomfortable real-world action required for genuine change.

• Flawless Online Archetype Illusion: Social media platforms elevate curated, hyper-disciplined aesthetics into unrealistic standards of human perfection, forcing everyday users into toxic loops of comparison and shame.

• Commercialisation of Existential Discontent: The modern wellness and self-improvement economy operates by intentionally pathologising normal human emotions and rebranding them as systemic optimisation problems to fix.

• The Ceiling of Digital Community: Digital-only connections hit a psychological ceiling; lasting personal transformation and fulfillment ultimately require grounding yourself in physical, local communities.

If this episode got you thinking, check out:

Sleep: Screens Stealing Our Slumber?

https://pod.link/1825601333/episode/N2NlNGQ3ZmItYTk1Yy00MjRlLTk5YjAtMmUyODM0OTRlNTQz

The Human Identity: Authenticity or Algorithmic Performance?

https://pod.link/1825601333/episode/YzU1NjhlYzYtMDVjNC00ODJkLTgzYjQtMzBhNDcwN2RkZTJi

Empowerment: Objectification Rebranded As Agency?

https://pod.link/1825601333/episode/YTVjZDI5NjYtOWUzZC00ZDQ4LWFkZWUtYWViZjlmMjRmYjUx

Guest links - Justin Leff

Website: https://www.soliliumcoaching.com/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/soliliumthoughts/

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@SoliliumThoughts

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