High-Functioning Depression: Why Women Who "Have It All Together" Feel Nothing w/ Dr. Judith Joseph

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[SPEAKER_01]: So that's the missing key to longevity.
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[SPEAKER_01]: We're doing all these things to live longer, but we're not being more joyful, so it's not sustainable.
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[SPEAKER_00]: You made mental health feel like a conversation with a friend, instead of a diagnosis.
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[SPEAKER_01]: I think people would be interested in science that way.
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[SPEAKER_01]: But it literally went viral.
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[SPEAKER_01]: People from all the world were reaching out to me.
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[SPEAKER_01]: I was being called to give these talks.
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[SPEAKER_01]: And I remember halfway through one of these talks.
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[SPEAKER_01]: I was like, you know, I think I'm depressed.
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[SPEAKER_01]: You cannot have a healthy life if you're not taking care of your mental health and you're not infusing life with joy.
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[SPEAKER_00]: for the woman who feels too depleted to chase that joy.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Where does she begin?
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[SPEAKER_01]: I would start with validation.
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[SPEAKER_01]: I think that many of us as women we don't acknowledge what's happening.
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[SPEAKER_00]: For the women that are listening to us, give them one sentence to use the next time a doctor tells her, it's just stress.
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[SPEAKER_01]: There are three things that you can do.
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[SPEAKER_01]: Number one, track your symptoms.
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[SPEAKER_01]: Number two, do the research before you go in.
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[SPEAKER_00]: The disruptor podcast is for informational purposes only and does not constitute medical advice.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Views expressed by guests are their own.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Consult your healthcare provider before making any medical decisions.
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[SPEAKER_00]: You know what depression looks like, the person who can't get out of bed, the one who goes dark, drops off, stops showing up.
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[SPEAKER_00]: What about the woman who shows up to everything?
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[SPEAKER_00]: Crushes the deadline, runs the household, answers every text, holds the whole thing together, and feels absolutely nothing.
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[SPEAKER_00]: No one's worried about her, she looks fine, she's a last person anyone would call depressed.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Medicine couldn't see her.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Didn't have a name for her, so she suffered in plain sight.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Convinced, it was just her.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Until tonight's guests decided that woman was done being invisible.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Dr. Judith Joseph.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Dr. Judith Joseph is a board certified psychiatrist, a researcher, and the author of the National Best Seller High Functioning.
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[SPEAKER_00]: She runs Manhattan Behavioral Medicine.
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[SPEAKER_00]: She chairs the women in medicine initiative at Columbia, and she is one of the most followed psychiatrists on the planet, not because she'd dumb the science down, but because she refused to.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Judith, I have been waiting for this one.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Let's get into it.
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[SPEAKER_00]: So 15 million views a month.
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[SPEAKER_00]: multiple role play videos that make people laugh and then quietly cry, you made mental health feel like a conversation with a friend instead of a diagnosis.
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[SPEAKER_00]: When did you realize that the internet was actually listening?
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[SPEAKER_01]: Well, it's interesting.
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[SPEAKER_01]: I never wanted to do social media.
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[SPEAKER_01]: I resisted it.
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[SPEAKER_01]: I was like so nervous about it and you know, I kind of fell into it.
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[SPEAKER_01]: And I wanted to be a serious doctor because I run this lab and going to these investigator meetings when I first started out, I was like the only young black woman probably the only black woman in the room, but I was like a lot younger than the principal investigator.
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[SPEAKER_01]: I was so afraid of going on social media because I thought it would really derail everything that I worked so hard to build, right?
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[SPEAKER_01]: And when I started being in front of cameras, it was with traditional media, like television, consulting, behind-the-scenes writing, and that was more respected that gave you a certain level of prestige and people trust you because television is very planned.
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[SPEAKER_01]: Nothing.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Nothing is random.
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[SPEAKER_00]: And you're the doctor.
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[SPEAKER_00]: They stopped.
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[SPEAKER_00]: On TV.
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[SPEAKER_00]: You're the one here.
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[SPEAKER_01]: Yes.
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[SPEAKER_01]: Yes.
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[SPEAKER_01]: That gives you a certain authority.
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[SPEAKER_01]: Right.
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[SPEAKER_01]: And at the time, socials were not really respected.
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[SPEAKER_01]: Like no one really thought about a professional being on socials.
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[SPEAKER_01]: But I had to because my students,
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[SPEAKER_01]: NYU, who I developed this course for over 10 years ago, teaching them how to give press interviews, how to be on camera, how to talk about mental health issues.
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[SPEAKER_01]: My students during the pandemic were saying none of our patients are really listening to the television.
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[SPEAKER_01]: They're on socials.
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[SPEAKER_01]: So I needed to learn how to use socials in order to teach my students.
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[SPEAKER_01]: And that's really how it happened.
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[SPEAKER_01]: I had to figure out how to use, I remember creating my own TikTok and like
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[SPEAKER_01]: Messing up and having like, go to YouTube to learn how to edit it and so forth.
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[SPEAKER_01]: So I really started off just falling into it and I remember I was in my lab and we were doing the first writing up the first ever peer reviewed study on high functioning depression in the world and I was like taking some from something from my learn from a study and putting it on social and then it just my viral.
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[SPEAKER_01]: And I did not expect that.
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[SPEAKER_01]: I didn't think people would be interested in science that way.
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[SPEAKER_01]: Like me talking about an hedonia.
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[SPEAKER_01]: I didn't think anyone would be like, oh, that's like, I need to learn about that.
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[SPEAKER_01]: But it literally went viral.
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[SPEAKER_01]: People from all the world were reaching out to me.
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[SPEAKER_01]: And so I thought, okay, this is something.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Because you presented it in a creative approachable, almost playful way, but still respectful and entertaining.
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[SPEAKER_00]: I think you made it very digestible for people.
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[SPEAKER_01]: And that's a difference.
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[SPEAKER_01]: Like when you do television and you know this, like when you do television, when you are presenting something scientific, there's a way you have to do it.
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[SPEAKER_00]: sound by right sound by and especially like you said I remember walking in those rooms thinking the same thing I don't look like everyone else in this room so then to be guarded when you're going on social media because we didn't know what it was like back then so you went viral yeah and how did that make you feel?
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[SPEAKER_01]: Well, that was also terrifying, because then my colleagues were reaching out like, hey, I saw you on social medias, that's the same you.
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[SPEAKER_01]: And I was like, that's me, and they were like, oh, well, my patients would not respect that.
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[SPEAKER_01]: Like, I have a very prestigious practice.
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[SPEAKER_01]: I have a psychoanalytic practice, or my colleagues in academia were like, oh, like, that's interesting.
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[SPEAKER_01]: What are you trying to be an actress, you know?
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[SPEAKER_01]: So initially, it was not seen as something that was positive, and people had a lot of
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[SPEAKER_01]: But, you know, as time went on, and they started to realize their patients are actually learning on socials, and at least this is a doctor who knows what she's talking about, who is trying to use Evan Space Medicine.
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[SPEAKER_01]: Right.
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[SPEAKER_01]: Those same colleagues reach out to me and they were like, can you teach me how to do it?
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[SPEAKER_01]: You know?
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[SPEAKER_00]: Because you do, you have, that there's an art to it, right?
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[SPEAKER_00]: They're just like, there's an art to medicine.
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[SPEAKER_00]: You have, I, one of my three kids is an actress.
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[SPEAKER_00]: You have a creative background, correct?
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[SPEAKER_01]: I don't.
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[SPEAKER_01]: I, you know, my creative background is in the church.
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[SPEAKER_01]: So my dad's a pastor.
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[SPEAKER_01]: Uh-huh.
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[SPEAKER_01]: and their four of us for children, the family, and we're back to back.
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[SPEAKER_01]: And my dad, he would call us on stage in the congregation, like randomly, like, okay, Judith, sing a song.
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[SPEAKER_01]: And I had such bad social anxiety.
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[SPEAKER_01]: It was like the worst for me.
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[SPEAKER_01]: I'd be like trembling, but you grow up in the church and you're indoctrinated to serve others and to use your platform to spread God's word.
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[SPEAKER_01]: And your dad's calling your name, so you better do it and everyone's waiting like, you know, and I'm from a Caribbean culture, so you can't necessarily be like, no, you do it, and so my siblings and I were constantly being pull on stage to perform in this, and I went to church like four times a week.
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[SPEAKER_01]: We were a pentacostal evangelical background, so.
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[SPEAKER_01]: I think about that, that was like my theater four times a week on a stage and so I never really thought about that as being performance like that was religion you know that was faith but I think that's where I get my comfort with expressing myself in front of you know a lot of people or you know when you have to perform you gotta be in and out and that's where the creativity comes from because my siblings and I would have to come up with different
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[SPEAKER_01]: songs and you know put together these stories together and then perform.
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[SPEAKER_01]: So I think that's my background but I have no formal trade.
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[SPEAKER_00]: I love that though because you are very, very creative.
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[SPEAKER_00]: I watch your videos as well.
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[SPEAKER_00]: And so you say that you have had to live with high functioning depression yourself.
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[SPEAKER_00]: What is the moment you stopped treating it privately and started saying it out loud?
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[SPEAKER_01]: it was really from 2020.
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[SPEAKER_01]: I was run this lab.
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[SPEAKER_01]: My daughter at the time was really young.
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[SPEAKER_01]: At the time I was married to a frontline worker and it was just a lot of pressure.
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[SPEAKER_01]: We couldn't stop the studies that were doing their FDA mandated studies so you can't necessarily like call patients didn't take them off of investigation product.
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[SPEAKER_01]: So we had to continue the work under these really dreadful circumstances.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Oh God and the world was everything was so unknown.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.
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[SPEAKER_00]: There was no certainty to anything.
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[SPEAKER_01]: No, I remember walking through time square and I was the only person in time square.
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[SPEAKER_01]: It felt like we were going to see.
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[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, thanks.
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[SPEAKER_01]: OK, but that was when I got a lot of calls.
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[SPEAKER_01]: So prior to that, I was doing a lot of media.
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[SPEAKER_01]: and people were reaching out to me to do a lot of interviews and give talks and help organizations hospitals to get through this trying time.
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[SPEAKER_01]: And so that was really a time that a lot of mental health professionals became public voices because people just about everyone was struggling.
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[SPEAKER_01]: And then we know that from pandemic, from disaster psychiatry, that pandemic disasters create a sense of anxiety and just about everyone.
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[SPEAKER_01]: most people recover, but there are vulnerable people who don't.
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[SPEAKER_01]: And so I was being called to give these talks, and I was back to back giving talks.
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[SPEAKER_01]: And I remember halfway through one of these talks to this major hospital system.
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[SPEAKER_01]: I was like, you know, I think I'm depressed.
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[SPEAKER_01]: And it kind of snuck up on me because on the outside, I was doing all the things.
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[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.
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[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.
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[SPEAKER_01]: I was doing care of everyone.
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[SPEAKER_01]: I looked so successful.
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[SPEAKER_01]: People were like, you're always on TV.
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[SPEAKER_01]: But no one knew that I was struggling with something called Anne Hadonia, which is a lack of joy, a lack of pleasure, a lack of interest.
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[SPEAKER_01]: What most people would describe as, like, me or, you know, feeling like just dull inside.
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[SPEAKER_01]: And so when I started talking about that, a lot of my clients were like, that's what I'm going through.
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[SPEAKER_01]: I'm just pushing through the pain.
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[SPEAKER_01]: I'm just like, you know, just getting things done, but not feeling alive.
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[SPEAKER_01]: and my clients were experiencing it.
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[SPEAKER_01]: I was experiencing it.
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[SPEAKER_01]: I was talking about it on socials and it literally went viral.
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[SPEAKER_00]: I give you so much credit because it's so scary to put your self out there as a provider because we are always taught to care for others, right?
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[SPEAKER_00]: And then also not to put on this air, but you know, you're the professional.
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[SPEAKER_00]: And so I think that helps people
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[SPEAKER_00]: I am not a mental health expert.
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[SPEAKER_00]: I deal with PMS and PMDD, and obviously the changes that happen in Permanent are positive menopause, but when you combine that with what was going on, it was the first time I had to admit my patients to mental health care units, and I had never done that before my life.
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[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.
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[SPEAKER_00]: And that's why it was such a scary time for all of us.
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[SPEAKER_00]: All right, girl.
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[SPEAKER_00]: So,
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[SPEAKER_00]: You talk about the five bees?
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[SPEAKER_00]: Yes.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Okay.
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[SPEAKER_00]: So your bees and my bees are different.
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[SPEAKER_00]: I talk about the vagina all the time.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Yours are validation, venting, values, vitals, and vision.
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[SPEAKER_00]: If a woman listening can start only one this week, which one and why.
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[SPEAKER_01]: Well, I think that your bee is very important.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Everyone's V is very important.
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[SPEAKER_00]: And your V is impacted by all of the five V. So there's some synergies there.
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[SPEAKER_01]: But I would start with validation.
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[SPEAKER_01]: I think it's the hardest for many people because validation is like,
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[SPEAKER_01]: Imagine you're in a really dark room and you can't see anything and you hear a loud crash, right?
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[SPEAKER_01]: Some of us would start freaking out.
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[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, right screaming.
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[SPEAKER_01]: Some would start swinging, depending on how you're raised.
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[SPEAKER_01]: Some would start running.
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[SPEAKER_01]: But if you turn the light on and you saw, oh,
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[SPEAKER_01]: that was just something that fell and broke.
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[SPEAKER_01]: I'm safe.
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[SPEAKER_01]: Then that decreases the uncertainty film or calm, right?
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[SPEAKER_01]: And yeah, the mess is still there, the problems still there, but at least you know what you're dealing with.
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[SPEAKER_01]: I think that many of us as women we don't acknowledge what's happening.
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[SPEAKER_01]: We don't turn on the light and our emotions.
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[SPEAKER_01]: We don't, you know, acknowledge and accept what's happening.
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[SPEAKER_01]: We just push it down.
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[SPEAKER_01]: We push through.
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[SPEAKER_01]: And then we wonder why we can't feel joy, right?
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[SPEAKER_01]: Because if you're pushing down your emotions, pushing down what you're experiencing, and that's your coping mechanism, you're numbing yourself, right?
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[SPEAKER_00]: Right?
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[SPEAKER_01]: And so I think that's very difficult for many of us, especially those of us who are high functioning, who are so accustomed to taking care of everyone else, who are so accustomed to being like, well, other people have it worse off or I don't want to burden others.
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[SPEAKER_01]: So validation is really important.
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[SPEAKER_01]: Take the time to acknowledge and accept what you're going through, right?
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[SPEAKER_00]: From head to toe.
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[SPEAKER_00]: I love that analogy though, because relating to my patients what I hear is if I had only known.
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[SPEAKER_00]: And I think that that analogy of being in the dark, that's the way they feel about their own body, but they have been pushing down their symptoms.
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[SPEAKER_00]: And a lot of times they may end up with a provider who does not validate them dismisses them.
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[SPEAKER_00]: So that's why I love that.
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[SPEAKER_00]: that analogy of turn on the light, acknowledge what's going on, because I think that's the deepest form of self-respect, like acknowledging what's going on and taking care of yourself, right?
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[SPEAKER_01]: And it's therapeutic in itself.
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[SPEAKER_01]: It's a very simple therapeutic intervention, acknowledge what you're going through, accept it without judgment, and then the uncertainty goes down, because you know what you're dealing with.
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[SPEAKER_01]: The human brain doesn't like uncertainty.
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[SPEAKER_01]: We don't like it.
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[SPEAKER_01]: 2020 taught us that.
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[SPEAKER_01]: So when we know what we're working with, that in itself decreases the anxiety, it's a therapeutic intervention.
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[SPEAKER_01]: So for example, my patients who are going through things like brain fog and their experiencing fatigue and so forth, when they know, oh, it's not me, right?
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[SPEAKER_01]: It's not me not being as good as I used to, not being able to multitask.
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[SPEAKER_01]: When they know, oh, this is due to a hormonal fluctuations.
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[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, that decreases the uncertainty, so many of them are like, I thought I had lupus.
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[SPEAKER_01]: I thought I had an autoimmune condition.
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[SPEAKER_01]: I thought I had this.
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[SPEAKER_01]: And it's like, oh wait, it's hormones?
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[SPEAKER_01]: Oh, and then you explain it and you show the chart and you're like, wow, and it's almost similar, I mean, more intense, but similar to when, you know, you're you're younger and you're getting your period.
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[SPEAKER_01]: And you're like, what's going on with me?
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[SPEAKER_01]: Like, why's my body changing?
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[SPEAKER_01]: And then like you get it, you're like, oh, right?
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[SPEAKER_01]: That's what it was.
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[SPEAKER_01]: Or when you have PMS and you're like, that's why I snapped at my partner.
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[SPEAKER_01]: You know?
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[SPEAKER_00]: But it's amazing to me what you said is that the brain doesn't like uncertainty.
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[SPEAKER_00]: And so then why does the brain go to that dark room?
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[SPEAKER_00]: And those dark thoughts and those bad places, right?
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[SPEAKER_00]: It's, you talk about the person who'd be swinging in that room and that would be me.
15:41.548 --> 15:42.748
[SPEAKER_00]: The lights go off.
15:43.108 --> 15:44.289
[SPEAKER_00]: And I hear a loud crash.
15:44.669 --> 15:51.451
[SPEAKER_01]: Well, our brains have evolved to focus on the negative and the most terrifying outcome, the most fearful outcome, right?
15:51.891 --> 15:53.051
[SPEAKER_01]: So we have protected it.
15:53.291 --> 15:57.632
[SPEAKER_01]: It is because if we anticipate the worst thing happening, then we're going to be ready for it, right?
15:57.852 --> 16:00.673
[SPEAKER_01]: And that's why we tend to focus on that one bad thing.
16:01.093 --> 16:07.514
[SPEAKER_01]: Like someone could tell you a thousand amazing things, but they tell you one bad thing and you're like, oh, you focus on the one bad thing, right?
16:07.614 --> 16:10.495
[SPEAKER_01]: People can be like, you're beautifully, you're brilliant, you're successful.
16:11.155 --> 16:11.795
[SPEAKER_01]: you did that wrong.
16:11.815 --> 16:12.576
[SPEAKER_01]: What are you going to do?
16:12.596 --> 16:14.157
[SPEAKER_01]: You're going to focus on the one thing you did wrong.
16:14.457 --> 16:20.940
[SPEAKER_01]: So our brains are just evolved to focus on those things for safety, for protection, for survival.
16:21.281 --> 16:27.684
[SPEAKER_01]: But again, if you know that, when I experience my patients, they're like, that's my brain doing that sort of a thing again, and then you can move on.
16:27.924 --> 16:36.869
[SPEAKER_01]: So the uncertainty is when you diminish that and you accept an acknowledge and without judgment, that uncertainty goes away and that's therapeutic and it's all.
16:37.235 --> 16:37.775
[SPEAKER_00]: I love that.
16:38.116 --> 16:38.456
[SPEAKER_00]: Okay.
16:38.716 --> 16:40.057
[SPEAKER_00]: So, we've got that.
16:40.958 --> 16:43.880
[SPEAKER_00]: So, let's talk about this, longevity.
16:44.641 --> 16:47.083
[SPEAKER_00]: So, huge, big topic.
16:47.643 --> 16:51.426
[SPEAKER_00]: We know that women live longer, but we live in poor health.
16:51.987 --> 16:56.070
[SPEAKER_00]: And you've been making the case that joy is not soft.
16:56.651 --> 16:58.913
[SPEAKER_00]: It is a longevity intervention.
16:59.513 --> 17:00.354
[SPEAKER_00]: Actually, love that.
17:01.114 --> 17:01.575
[SPEAKER_00]: Why does
17:07.522 --> 17:09.624
[SPEAKER_01]: Well, I do a lot of these longevity events.
17:09.664 --> 17:10.605
[SPEAKER_01]: I see you at some of them.
17:10.625 --> 17:18.333
[SPEAKER_00]: That's because you and I are going to be climbing mountains or swimming in the ocean, whatever we pick when we're age something.
17:18.393 --> 17:18.653
[SPEAKER_00]: Right?
17:19.294 --> 17:21.216
[SPEAKER_00]: And not in a nursing home, so.
17:21.496 --> 17:25.780
[SPEAKER_01]: And I go to these, and I hope I don't get disinviated or undivided from it.
17:25.820 --> 17:28.002
[SPEAKER_01]: But a lot of them, you go and you're like,
17:28.863 --> 17:33.829
[SPEAKER_01]: They're going to live long, but they're not going to be happy, they seem very intense, you know?
17:33.969 --> 17:38.275
[SPEAKER_00]: Right, because we're buying a hacking, but we're saying about the mental health piece.
17:38.355 --> 17:38.595
[SPEAKER_00]: Right.
17:38.635 --> 17:39.156
[SPEAKER_00]: I get it.
17:39.436 --> 17:39.756
[SPEAKER_00]: Yes.
17:40.337 --> 17:42.099
[SPEAKER_01]: But, you know, so I often say that.
17:42.862 --> 17:45.786
[SPEAKER_01]: you know, it's longevity is not just about the years.
17:45.906 --> 17:46.987
[SPEAKER_01]: It's about the quality.
17:47.608 --> 17:54.136
[SPEAKER_01]: And when I say that, it's like, oh, people are starting to pay attention because they're doing all these things.
17:54.957 --> 17:56.138
[SPEAKER_01]: And they're trying all these things.
17:56.198 --> 17:59.222
[SPEAKER_01]: And the other probably going to live maybe one or two years longer.
17:59.939 --> 18:17.458
[SPEAKER_01]: But those one or two years are going to be really rough because they're going to be spending all their time doing things just right so that optimization culture, I think has robbed the joy out of the longevity world, so I'm trying to infuse that back in and I often say that joy is like the key to longevity the missing link because.
18:18.258 --> 18:31.064
[SPEAKER_01]: When people in the corporate world used to try to get their employees to be healthy, they'd spend all this money on like these cardiac programs, these, you know, stop smoking, these anti, you know, trying to prevent cancer programs.
18:31.664 --> 18:36.206
[SPEAKER_01]: But what they found was that when they put that money into things like mental wellness and mental health,
18:37.006 --> 18:56.752
[SPEAKER_01]: The employees are actually living longer, and so you cannot have a healthy life if you're not taking care of your mental health and you're not infusing a life with joy, because joyful people live longer because they're more physically healthy, they have better relationships, they're better in terms of their productivity at work, and they're more likely to make the world a better place.
18:57.452 --> 18:59.073
[SPEAKER_01]: So that's the missing key to longevity.
18:59.093 --> 19:02.874
[SPEAKER_01]: We're doing all these things to live longer, but we're not being more joyful, so it's not sustainable.
19:03.433 --> 19:05.754
[SPEAKER_00]: I think, you know, I'm obsessed with the blue zones.
19:05.954 --> 19:11.116
[SPEAKER_00]: I actually want to create one, which I learned you can do, or I want to move to one.
19:11.256 --> 19:17.679
[SPEAKER_00]: So, but they talk about that, the sense of community and waking up with the sense of purpose.
19:17.819 --> 19:26.542
[SPEAKER_00]: And so every single blue zone, yeah, they talk about food and movement and the things that, you know, every other person talks about it, these long-dewity conferences.
19:27.022 --> 19:28.683
[SPEAKER_00]: But the difference that I've seen,
19:29.543 --> 19:39.408
[SPEAKER_00]: in that research is that they are actually paying attention to the spiritual, the mental health, and actually just that feeling of, I forgot what they call it.
19:39.428 --> 19:41.228
[SPEAKER_00]: But, you know, waking up with purpose.
19:41.288 --> 19:42.849
[SPEAKER_00]: So they do pay attention.
19:42.909 --> 19:44.610
[SPEAKER_00]: And when you look at a lot of those,
19:45.050 --> 19:58.996
[SPEAKER_00]: people who are living in their eighth, ninth decade of life, a lot of those images of that are of them laughing and playing games with their family and doing things that truly bring them joy and happiness.
19:59.056 --> 20:00.997
[SPEAKER_00]: They're not just existing.
20:01.217 --> 20:08.320
[SPEAKER_00]: And I think I completely agree with you, but I've never thought about it in the way that you have just put it so.
20:08.520 --> 20:14.927
[SPEAKER_01]: Well, the longest study in longevity, the Harvard longitudinal study, Dr. Schultz is the PI on that.
20:15.528 --> 20:22.997
[SPEAKER_01]: They looked at, initially it was like men who were Harvard students and graduates and then they followed them since 1938.
20:23.077 --> 20:27.121
[SPEAKER_01]: I think go as and they followed their offspring and they continue to follow those families.
20:28.135 --> 20:31.478
[SPEAKER_01]: You know what they found, the key to longevity was relationships.
20:32.459 --> 20:41.226
[SPEAKER_01]: And not just like the romantic relationship, but the friendships, the family, the connection, that was the key to longevity.
20:41.786 --> 20:45.589
[SPEAKER_01]: And I've gone to these longevity conferences abroad, and I tell you they're very different than the ones here.
20:46.030 --> 20:48.432
[SPEAKER_01]: People are drinking that glass of wine, God forbid.
20:50.495 --> 20:50.915
[SPEAKER_00]: I know.
20:50.935 --> 20:56.460
[SPEAKER_00]: It was like the first time we're living in a country, in our country where the majority of people don't drink anymore.
20:56.640 --> 20:57.440
[SPEAKER_00]: Yes.
20:57.541 --> 21:01.824
[SPEAKER_01]: And they drink in the blue zones too, but it is about the connection.
21:01.864 --> 21:06.968
[SPEAKER_01]: So when they go and pick out their fish with the Omega-3 fatty acids that are good for the brain.
21:07.308 --> 21:07.949
[SPEAKER_01]: What are they doing?
21:08.329 --> 21:13.533
[SPEAKER_01]: They're talking to the guy who caught the fish, it's a communal thing.
21:13.613 --> 21:15.214
[SPEAKER_01]: They're spending time in the market.
21:15.494 --> 21:17.436
[SPEAKER_01]: They're getting some exercise walking there, right?
21:17.876 --> 21:25.258
[SPEAKER_01]: So we have to look at all of the ingredients to true longevity and then the blue zones a lot of it is connection and a lot of it is joy.
21:25.598 --> 21:36.701
[SPEAKER_00]: Yes, I couldn't agree with you more when we now I know Iceland isn't one of the blue zones, but I remember when I was there it is always one of the happiest countries and I was like, what is it?
21:36.761 --> 21:37.781
[SPEAKER_00]: The divorce rate is high.
21:38.221 --> 21:40.642
[SPEAKER_00]: The education rate is not extraordinarily high.
21:40.762 --> 21:42.182
[SPEAKER_00]: It's dark half the year.
21:42.622 --> 21:46.163
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm like it's got to be something in the water or it's magic, but people were
21:46.863 --> 21:48.584
[SPEAKER_00]: very, very happy there.
21:48.824 --> 21:52.186
[SPEAKER_00]: It always interests me learning about that kind of stuff.
21:52.926 --> 22:08.395
[SPEAKER_00]: So you connect joy to the hard stuff, to physical health, to resilience, understress, nervous system regulation for the woman who feels too depleted to chase that joy.
22:08.815 --> 22:13.978
[SPEAKER_00]: Kind of like, and I don't feel like you were talking about, like I just, forget it, I don't even want to start.
22:14.198 --> 22:14.558
[SPEAKER_00]: Where does
22:16.479 --> 22:20.202
[SPEAKER_01]: Well, I tell my patients to look at their hand and say themselves every day.
22:21.143 --> 22:23.265
[SPEAKER_01]: I am built with the DNA for joy, right?
22:23.325 --> 22:24.946
[SPEAKER_01]: It is my birth right as a human.
22:25.447 --> 22:29.911
[SPEAKER_01]: So if I'm not feeling that, then something's wrong because it's in my DNA, right?
22:30.972 --> 22:36.536
[SPEAKER_01]: And so I think for a good place to start is to really understand the science of your happiness.
22:36.596 --> 22:37.597
[SPEAKER_01]: That's the model of my lab.
22:38.238 --> 22:39.259
[SPEAKER_01]: So there's a whole field called the
22:40.860 --> 22:43.161
[SPEAKER_01]: But the science of your happiness is different than mine.
22:43.782 --> 22:47.364
[SPEAKER_01]: It's different than someone else, because there's only one you, right?
22:47.844 --> 22:50.606
[SPEAKER_01]: There's only ever going to be one you, ever, right?
22:50.706 --> 22:52.326
[SPEAKER_01]: So take the time to understand.
22:52.887 --> 22:54.588
[SPEAKER_01]: Well, where am I losing my joy?
22:55.568 --> 23:01.932
[SPEAKER_01]: And for women in particular, you know, I'll ask them to draw out something called the Biosechosocial, which you and I learned in medical school.
23:02.412 --> 23:04.753
[SPEAKER_01]: Every med student learns it and then throws away.
23:06.074 --> 23:19.771
[SPEAKER_01]: We use it in sexual health all the time, so yes, but you know we'll write up at least in psychiatry We'll write up these beautiful evaluations and there's always a section called the biosechosocial no-one reads it No patient reads it.
23:20.151 --> 23:22.934
[SPEAKER_01]: So I thought well, why don't we get our patients to do it themselves?
23:22.954 --> 23:24.596
[SPEAKER_01]: So I literally will sit with my patients
23:25.377 --> 23:29.903
[SPEAKER_01]: and we draw it out, and then they start to fill in, okay, in the biology circle.
23:30.163 --> 23:31.845
[SPEAKER_01]: Well, what, where are you losing your joy there?
23:31.885 --> 23:41.216
[SPEAKER_01]: So some of the patients may have, you know, biological or medical things that are getting in the way of their joy, like hormonal fluctuation, autoimmune conditions.
23:42.618 --> 23:46.862
[SPEAKER_01]: things like even like pain when they're having sex, right?
23:46.982 --> 23:59.113
[SPEAKER_01]: So that's the biology part of it, the psychology part of it, some of our patients have ADHD, or the neurodivergence, so they're masking all day long, they're depleted, or they may have past traumas that are not processed, or attachment issues.
23:59.573 --> 24:00.734
[SPEAKER_01]: And then the social aspect,
24:01.575 --> 24:06.316
[SPEAKER_01]: Some of them are engaging in things that are not necessarily the healthiest, like not getting enough movement.
24:06.397 --> 24:09.818
[SPEAKER_01]: Their sleep is interrupted because they're drinking caffeine all day, right?
24:10.598 --> 24:14.319
[SPEAKER_01]: Drinking too much alcohol, maybe their relationships are toxic, right?
24:14.799 --> 24:17.080
[SPEAKER_00]: Right, that's some of their caretakers for parents.
24:17.140 --> 24:22.221
[SPEAKER_01]: Right, some things, yes, so those are all areas that you know, you could be losing your joy.
24:22.281 --> 24:27.663
[SPEAKER_01]: So use it as a kind of a fingerprint to your joy, like your bio, psychosocial,
24:28.343 --> 24:36.226
[SPEAKER_01]: is not like anyone else's just like your finger prints on like anyone else's and try to map it out Where are you losing the most joy for some of your patients?
24:36.246 --> 24:56.195
[SPEAKER_01]: It's probably the biological part right the hormones Once you address that then and then they're still experiencing it Well, where else in their lives right for some patients It's really that it's heavy on the psychology part maybe they're in fight or flight through the unprocessed trauma That's where they need to focus or for some the social maybe they're in a toxic relationship
24:57.055 --> 25:02.442
[SPEAKER_01]: and you could do everything right, you know, all the cali you want, but that person's still there, you know, draining your joy.
25:03.323 --> 25:04.865
[SPEAKER_01]: So maybe that's where you need to spend more time.
25:04.885 --> 25:14.799
[SPEAKER_01]: So, and that's what this model, I think, is really empowering, and expect that model to change over time because your social stressors change, your body changes.
25:15.379 --> 25:21.065
[SPEAKER_01]: You know, psychology may be your things like your attachment will change over time depending on, you know, your background.
25:21.565 --> 25:25.049
[SPEAKER_01]: So really use this as a model for your joy.
25:25.089 --> 25:26.991
[SPEAKER_01]: This is your blueprint for your joy.
25:27.011 --> 25:29.193
[SPEAKER_01]: This is your fingerprint because there's only one you.
25:29.713 --> 25:31.275
[SPEAKER_01]: And patients find that really empowering.
25:32.227 --> 25:45.171
[SPEAKER_00]: I love the what you said that we are made up our DNA, we're built for joy, and that everyone's joy is individualized and looks different, just like their menopause care or their health care.
25:45.391 --> 25:59.275
[SPEAKER_00]: So it's a great way to look at it in such an easy way to get someone like look at your hand, like and get them to stop being scattered and actually concentrate on a, I don't want to say a command,
26:00.515 --> 26:01.556
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, I like it.
26:01.616 --> 26:03.016
[SPEAKER_01]: Well, my patients come to me.
26:03.036 --> 26:04.117
[SPEAKER_01]: They're like, I tried this.
26:04.297 --> 26:04.937
[SPEAKER_01]: I tried that.
26:05.077 --> 26:05.497
[SPEAKER_01]: I tried this.
26:05.777 --> 26:06.518
[SPEAKER_01]: It worked for my friend.
26:06.838 --> 26:07.778
[SPEAKER_01]: It worked for this person.
26:07.818 --> 26:08.439
[SPEAKER_01]: It didn't work for me.
26:08.759 --> 26:10.399
[SPEAKER_01]: And I see this at these longevity events.
26:10.419 --> 26:11.920
[SPEAKER_01]: It's like, try this and your life would better.
26:12.120 --> 26:12.640
[SPEAKER_01]: You try it.
26:12.781 --> 26:13.361
[SPEAKER_01]: Oh, that didn't work.
26:13.521 --> 26:13.981
[SPEAKER_01]: You try this.
26:14.301 --> 26:16.282
[SPEAKER_01]: Well, do you even understand where you're losing your joy?
26:16.742 --> 26:18.163
[SPEAKER_01]: That's where you need to prioritize it.
26:18.569 --> 26:23.492
[SPEAKER_00]: Well, and I think when they try things and it doesn't work, it makes them feel even more broken.
26:23.512 --> 26:27.814
[SPEAKER_00]: And you're going back to your biosychosocial and talking about all of that.
26:27.894 --> 26:34.718
[SPEAKER_00]: I remember having a patient and talking to her about her loss of desire, and we had talked about everything.
26:34.778 --> 26:37.799
[SPEAKER_00]: And so we had tried the FDA approved medications.
26:37.819 --> 26:38.800
[SPEAKER_00]: We had tried hormones.
26:38.840 --> 26:40.201
[SPEAKER_00]: We had tried therapy.
26:40.221 --> 26:41.381
[SPEAKER_00]: We had tried counseling.
26:42.142 --> 26:42.322
[SPEAKER_00]: And
26:42.862 --> 26:50.609
[SPEAKER_00]: Finally, you know, she came back and she's like nothing's working and I was like What is going on with your partner?
26:50.629 --> 27:01.699
[SPEAKER_00]: She wouldn't really talk about him and she's like I hate him I'm like girl this stuff is not love potion number nine like I cannot break you fall love with him Saw her six months later.
27:01.759 --> 27:07.024
[SPEAKER_00]: She was having the best sex of her life and I go what finally click Like did you go to go to therapy and she's like girl?
27:07.064 --> 27:07.624
[SPEAKER_00]: I got a new part.
27:07.644 --> 27:07.824
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah
27:08.845 --> 27:13.627
[SPEAKER_00]: I think that was it, you know, but sometimes you don't want to see the truth.
27:14.148 --> 27:21.031
[SPEAKER_00]: And so speaking of menopause in the mind, you developed a method for mental health symptoms of menopause.
27:21.811 --> 27:27.914
[SPEAKER_00]: I live in the hormone half of that all day and you live in the mind half, which it shouldn't be, right?
27:27.934 --> 27:28.455
[SPEAKER_00]: That way, right?
27:28.475 --> 27:30.215
[SPEAKER_00]: Because we're all working together.
27:30.235 --> 27:35.078
[SPEAKER_00]: So where do we actually meet on that patient?
27:35.893 --> 27:38.975
[SPEAKER_01]: Well, I work with people in your profession all the time.
27:39.256 --> 27:40.557
[SPEAKER_01]: I don't prescribe hormones.
27:40.617 --> 27:41.798
[SPEAKER_01]: I wouldn't even know where to begin.
27:42.658 --> 27:44.820
[SPEAKER_01]: So I need to work with people like you.
27:44.840 --> 27:53.567
[SPEAKER_01]: And vice versa, you know, obese, and yes, and the acknowledges you absolutely because I don't know where to begin.
27:53.907 --> 27:56.709
[SPEAKER_00]: Other than listening, right, and validating like you said.
27:57.210 --> 27:59.572
[SPEAKER_01]: It's interesting because medicine is so siloed.
28:00.432 --> 28:02.694
[SPEAKER_01]: And I used to be an anesthesiology resident.
28:02.714 --> 28:03.535
[SPEAKER_01]: I did that for two years.
28:05.416 --> 28:10.461
[SPEAKER_01]: when we were in the ICU, and there was like a demented patient or a patient who was delirious.
28:11.182 --> 28:12.943
[SPEAKER_01]: We'd always be like, call psych, you know?
28:13.304 --> 28:17.788
[SPEAKER_01]: And there was this like stigma around the psychiatrist's a comment and like unlock their brain.
28:17.828 --> 28:19.710
[SPEAKER_01]: It's like, that's not what it's like at all.
28:20.090 --> 28:23.934
[SPEAKER_01]: We need to work together as a team because that mind-body connection is so real.
28:24.154 --> 28:24.434
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.
28:24.455 --> 28:29.960
[SPEAKER_01]: Things that happen here, impact your body, things that happen in your body, impact your mind and how you feel about yourself.
28:30.440 --> 28:37.788
[SPEAKER_01]: But I do think that it's important to realize that hormonal health may impact some of the mental health symptoms.
28:37.908 --> 28:45.896
[SPEAKER_00]: And even sexual health, people who are not having sexual intercourse or intimacy and they want to.
28:47.177 --> 28:49.818
[SPEAKER_00]: often are anxious or depressed and vice versa.
28:50.238 --> 29:00.460
[SPEAKER_00]: We see more confidence and better mental health and those people who are at the intimacy levels and their sexual health is defined or where they wanted to be.
29:00.980 --> 29:03.261
[SPEAKER_00]: So really, really interesting.
29:04.421 --> 29:10.223
[SPEAKER_01]: There's a sexual health doctor in the office we write next to mine and all they do is pelvic PT.
29:10.723 --> 29:12.363
[SPEAKER_01]: That's all they do pelvic floor work
29:16.864 --> 29:22.309
[SPEAKER_01]: enjoy sex and not have discomfort, and it's so connected.
29:22.890 --> 29:24.051
[SPEAKER_01]: I wouldn't know where to begin with that.
29:25.372 --> 29:30.436
[SPEAKER_01]: I'm not trained in that, but I do know that vaginal health impacts your confidence.
29:30.857 --> 29:31.898
[SPEAKER_00]: Oh, absolutely.
29:31.918 --> 29:36.081
[SPEAKER_00]: And think about it, trauma, a lot of times, vaginismists.
29:36.842 --> 29:59.099
[SPEAKER_00]: starts from, it doesn't even need a physical trauma event like sometimes it happens from a painful first attempt at intercourse but a lot of times it's triggered by maybe you were raised in a very religious household and taught sexes bad, bad, bad and so your whole pelvic floor tightens the first time you go to have sex.
30:00.240 --> 30:20.280
[SPEAKER_00]: And a patient is so confused because nothing to her, nothing traumatic has ever happened, but when you unlock it and you actually talk to her about it, you recognize that her entire life, she was taught, don't do this, and then all of a sudden, she's allowed to, and her body is not cooperating.
30:20.560 --> 30:22.602
[SPEAKER_00]: And so a lot of that is unlocking that.
30:22.662 --> 30:30.409
[SPEAKER_00]: So pelvic floor physical therapy, vaginal volume, sometimes Botox, super interesting, the mind body connection.
30:30.429 --> 30:34.512
[SPEAKER_00]: So you have pushed really, really hard from an opposed research.
30:34.532 --> 30:38.956
[SPEAKER_00]: And you taught the first menopause master class with Halle Berry.
30:39.536 --> 30:45.622
[SPEAKER_00]: What does the science still not know about the menopausal brain that you wish we had funding for?
30:46.342 --> 30:49.346
[SPEAKER_01]: Well, definitely brain fog, yes.
30:49.546 --> 31:00.380
[SPEAKER_01]: One of the things that came up from that black box warning meeting with the FDA, and there was a bit of back and forth about it, was whether or not hormonal.
31:01.421 --> 31:11.563
[SPEAKER_01]: Therapies can actually impact whether or not you develop dementia and that's still like a very large debate because We just don't have enough research the study is out there thus far.
31:11.623 --> 31:13.023
[SPEAKER_01]: Don't definitely say it.
31:13.604 --> 31:20.385
[SPEAKER_01]: Some of the study say it may help with like Brain fog but others say but dementia know and there's just a lot of back and forth.
31:20.925 --> 31:26.886
[SPEAKER_01]: The reality is that we just need to do more research We need to look at it, you know from different angles
31:30.627 --> 31:32.027
[SPEAKER_01]: I think sleep is such an issue.
31:32.808 --> 31:37.289
[SPEAKER_01]: Not everyone can engage in something like cognitive behavioral therapy for insomnia.
31:37.689 --> 31:38.429
[SPEAKER_00]: It's effective.
31:39.109 --> 31:39.849
[SPEAKER_01]: But think about it.
31:39.889 --> 31:44.010
[SPEAKER_01]: When you're like taking care of your kids, you're taking care of your job.
31:44.590 --> 31:46.391
[SPEAKER_01]: You know, you have your take care of elderly parents.
31:46.791 --> 31:47.871
[SPEAKER_01]: Who has time for that?
31:48.571 --> 31:49.452
[SPEAKER_01]: A lot of people don't.
31:49.632 --> 31:50.392
[SPEAKER_00]: No, they don't.
31:50.492 --> 31:53.773
[SPEAKER_00]: And you have to find a program or a provider that does that
32:00.134 --> 32:02.777
[SPEAKER_01]: You can do it online, but again, who has time for that?
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[SPEAKER_00]: I don't know if that's Dr. Javay.
32:04.818 --> 32:05.679
[SPEAKER_00]: Is there an app?
32:05.759 --> 32:07.161
[SPEAKER_00]: Is there something else I can do?
32:07.181 --> 32:08.882
[SPEAKER_00]: I just need to sleep and I get it.
32:09.002 --> 32:16.148
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm like you just want it fixed because it's so essential to everyday functioning.
32:18.150 --> 32:30.372
[SPEAKER_00]: So, you've talked a lot about your research, so let's just say it plainly, even though you have a lot of followers, you're not a wellness influencer, you run a research lab, and you've got dozens of clinical trials.
32:31.333 --> 32:32.793
[SPEAKER_01]: Yes, I've done about 130.
32:32.813 --> 32:32.893
[SPEAKER_01]: Wow.
32:33.033 --> 32:38.794
[SPEAKER_00]: Okay, I'm like a plating for you.
32:39.594 --> 32:44.035
[SPEAKER_00]: How do you hold both the rigor and the reach simultaneously?
32:44.887 --> 32:45.988
[SPEAKER_01]: I have an incredible team.
32:46.208 --> 32:47.768
[SPEAKER_01]: There's no way that I could do it all.
32:48.309 --> 32:50.209
[SPEAKER_01]: I mean, I just cannot.
32:50.690 --> 32:53.791
[SPEAKER_01]: And also, with these studies that I do, you do need a team.
32:54.611 --> 32:56.092
[SPEAKER_01]: They are simply regulated.
32:56.172 --> 32:59.053
[SPEAKER_01]: So patients are in double blind to see book-controlled studies.
32:59.113 --> 33:04.856
[SPEAKER_01]: And so I can't even know certain things because you have this with the team to make sure certain people are blinded and so forth.
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[SPEAKER_01]: But I have a great team.
33:07.457 --> 33:12.179
[SPEAKER_00]: I love a leader that gives credit to her team.
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[SPEAKER_01]: Oh, they know.
33:15.922 --> 33:16.362
[SPEAKER_01]: They know.
33:16.422 --> 33:16.923
[SPEAKER_01]: They know.
33:16.983 --> 33:17.343
[SPEAKER_01]: They know.
33:17.363 --> 33:17.583
[SPEAKER_01]: They know.
33:17.603 --> 33:18.003
[SPEAKER_01]: They know.
33:18.023 --> 33:19.104
[SPEAKER_01]: They know.
33:19.124 --> 33:19.785
[SPEAKER_01]: They know.
33:20.205 --> 33:20.485
[SPEAKER_01]: They know.
33:20.545 --> 33:21.866
[SPEAKER_01]: They know.
33:22.026 --> 33:22.546
[SPEAKER_01]: They know.
33:22.626 --> 33:22.887
[SPEAKER_01]: They know.
33:22.907 --> 33:23.347
[SPEAKER_01]: They know.
33:23.367 --> 33:23.747
[SPEAKER_01]: They know.
33:23.767 --> 33:24.748
[SPEAKER_01]: They know.
33:24.768 --> 33:25.308
[SPEAKER_01]: They know.
33:25.328 --> 33:25.588
[SPEAKER_01]: They know.
33:25.608 --> 33:26.129
[SPEAKER_01]: They know.
33:26.469 --> 33:26.789
[SPEAKER_01]: They know.
33:26.809 --> 33:27.069
[SPEAKER_01]: They know.
33:27.089 --> 33:27.430
[SPEAKER_01]: They know.
33:27.470 --> 33:28.010
[SPEAKER_01]: They know.
33:28.030 --> 33:28.530
[SPEAKER_01]: They know.
33:28.590 --> 33:29.471
[SPEAKER_01]: They know.
33:29.511 --> 33:29.751
[SPEAKER_01]: They know.
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[SPEAKER_01]: They know.
33:40.758 --> 33:44.420
[SPEAKER_01]: The media and the academia go together because I teach the doctors.
33:45.341 --> 34:03.972
[SPEAKER_01]: I start off at NYU and now I'm working with Harvard, I just train Harvard as an an adjective instructor and we're working to bring these media skills to other colleges, other universities around the country because realities that most people get their mental health and their health care online but health care professionals.
34:04.632 --> 34:05.533
[SPEAKER_01]: they don't want to be online.
34:05.733 --> 34:06.334
[SPEAKER_01]: They're afraid.
34:06.734 --> 34:08.496
[SPEAKER_01]: And if they want to be online, they don't know how to start.
34:09.137 --> 34:23.313
[SPEAKER_01]: So Harvard's doing the Harvard Creative Program, I'm now an instructor, is doing an amazing thing where they're partnering with these organizations and these other universities to help health care professionals feel comfortable creating content to combat misinformation.
34:23.853 --> 34:29.134
[SPEAKER_00]: And I love that so much because I, like you, was very hesitant to get on social media.
34:29.154 --> 34:32.355
[SPEAKER_00]: And I honestly was hoping that it would go away.
34:32.375 --> 34:45.599
[SPEAKER_00]: And then when I realized it wasn't going away and I've done some clinical research with the bear that's coming out in the fall, talking about basically the call to action is please, more doctors like you and I,
34:46.359 --> 35:08.265
[SPEAKER_00]: need to get on social media so that we can put more and more credible information out there, evidence-based, and kind of flush out the noise, and the myths, and dispel all of that kind of noise that's out there, so that patients and individuals can find really good information and get the help.
35:08.825 --> 35:09.565
[SPEAKER_00]: that they need.
35:09.705 --> 35:13.826
[SPEAKER_00]: Plus in a lot of places, I know for us, women's health care, there's a desert.
35:14.286 --> 35:23.828
[SPEAKER_00]: And I know for mental health, a lot of times, that's why people are going online because the weights are so long to get in with a professional like yourself.
35:24.588 --> 35:31.609
[SPEAKER_00]: So for the women that are listening to us, give them one sentence to use the next time a doctor tells her,
35:34.530 --> 35:36.252
[SPEAKER_01]: There are three things that you can do.
35:36.792 --> 35:48.884
[SPEAKER_01]: So I think before you go to see the doctor, because like you said, not just with mental health, you know, with like other appointments, especially women's health, the weight time is so long, you're waiting, you're waiting, and you're just like finally I'm in the door.
35:49.785 --> 35:51.106
[SPEAKER_01]: And then you see a doctor, and then you.
35:51.927 --> 35:53.748
[SPEAKER_01]: you're disappointed and you're deflated, right?
35:54.288 --> 35:55.589
[SPEAKER_01]: So do these three things.
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[SPEAKER_01]: Number one, track your symptoms.
35:58.590 --> 36:11.036
[SPEAKER_01]: So it could be manually, it could be digitally, but right down, you know, if it's mental health, right down what your symptoms are, right down what you're eating that day, right down, you know, are you how many hours of sleep are you getting?
36:11.236 --> 36:12.517
[SPEAKER_01]: What are your physical symptoms?
36:13.437 --> 36:28.486
[SPEAKER_01]: Are there anything stressful happening that they keep a log because that information is so important and most of these mental health Symptoms related to mental health even the physical symptoms That's what doctors need to make a diagnosis to come up with a treatment plan.
36:28.526 --> 36:32.989
[SPEAKER_01]: Yes, but by the time you're there You probably have our soul flustered.
36:33.009 --> 36:40.294
[SPEAKER_01]: I mean you're dealing with the hormonal fluctuations that can cause a little bit brain fog too So have your symptoms in that book ready to go.
36:40.514 --> 36:41.814
[SPEAKER_01]: Okay, number two
36:43.055 --> 36:59.460
[SPEAKER_01]: Do the research before you go in, so try and read as much as you can, join a group, you know, a group of like-minded people who are talking about their experiences and so forth, whatever it is, a reputable group, and try to do your research beforehand.
36:59.720 --> 37:07.083
[SPEAKER_01]: So that's something that in the mental health world we call psycho education, like learning about what your senses are learning about the possibilities, learning about the possible treatments.
37:07.783 --> 37:10.745
[SPEAKER_01]: When you expose your brain to that, what does that do?
37:10.965 --> 37:12.426
[SPEAKER_01]: It decreases the uncertainty, right?
37:12.486 --> 37:13.967
[SPEAKER_01]: The human brain doesn't like uncertainty.
37:14.647 --> 37:18.870
[SPEAKER_01]: So you have more of your bearings in tech because you're exposing your brain to something.
37:18.890 --> 37:20.070
[SPEAKER_01]: You're getting it accustomed to something.
37:20.411 --> 37:21.611
[SPEAKER_01]: So you have a less anxiety.
37:21.731 --> 37:25.674
[SPEAKER_01]: Because when you have anxiety and you're trying to absorb information, you don't remember it.
37:25.994 --> 37:28.878
[SPEAKER_00]: and an appointment that is often truncated, right?
37:29.038 --> 37:29.699
[SPEAKER_00]: So, okay.
37:30.359 --> 37:34.244
[SPEAKER_01]: And then number three, have clear goals, okay?
37:34.304 --> 37:37.628
[SPEAKER_01]: So when you go on with your doctor, you're like, this is what I expect, right?
37:38.249 --> 37:41.012
[SPEAKER_01]: I wanna feel better, or I wanna understand something better.
37:41.913 --> 37:47.136
[SPEAKER_01]: have a clear goal and make that goal known to your physician or your healthcare professional.
37:47.657 --> 37:54.160
[SPEAKER_01]: If you don't have a goal with regards to your symptoms or your health or whatever, how are they going to be able to align with you?
37:54.741 --> 37:57.402
[SPEAKER_01]: Those three things are so simple, anyone can do them.
37:58.423 --> 37:59.384
[SPEAKER_00]: No, I love the facts.
37:59.604 --> 38:02.586
[SPEAKER_00]: Yes, because that will optimize your outcome.
38:03.206 --> 38:07.548
[SPEAKER_00]: So, right down your symptoms, do the research ahead of time, have a goal.
38:08.069 --> 38:09.470
[SPEAKER_00]: You heard it right here.
38:10.871 --> 38:14.174
[SPEAKER_01]: And if they're not helping you get to that goal, you gotta find a different doctor.
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[SPEAKER_00]: See, I love that.
38:15.154 --> 38:16.055
[SPEAKER_00]: That's what I say too.
38:16.235 --> 38:17.717
[SPEAKER_00]: No negotiation, right?
38:17.757 --> 38:19.478
[SPEAKER_00]: Just find another doctor.
38:20.159 --> 38:24.983
[SPEAKER_00]: And honestly, when patients come like that, I'm like, I gotta make sure that I'm delivering, right?
38:25.103 --> 38:25.824
[SPEAKER_01]: It gets your doctor.
38:25.944 --> 38:26.845
[SPEAKER_01]: Oh, okay, this is it.
38:27.505 --> 38:29.345
[SPEAKER_01]: this is a really determined one, right?
38:29.786 --> 38:35.787
[SPEAKER_01]: So you're really getting their attention, you're getting their respect, and you're helping them because a lot like you said, you have 15 minutes.
38:36.207 --> 38:44.449
[SPEAKER_01]: So if you're the doctor who's, and we're human too, if someone had a bad day or they're flustered or they're dealing with something personally, you're part of the treatment team.
38:44.529 --> 38:48.270
[SPEAKER_01]: I tell my patients this all the time, you are at the most important part of this treatment team.
38:48.390 --> 38:49.390
[SPEAKER_01]: We are doing this together.
38:49.490 --> 38:51.091
[SPEAKER_00]: We are partners in this together.
38:51.831 --> 38:58.315
[SPEAKER_00]: So picture the woman who gets diagnosed with high functioning depression 10 years from now because of the category U-built.
38:59.556 --> 39:00.636
[SPEAKER_00]: What's different about her life?
39:02.237 --> 39:07.520
[SPEAKER_01]: I think 10 years from now she's realizing that her joy is contagious, right?
39:08.101 --> 39:13.684
[SPEAKER_01]: Because she's built the life that she's always wanted and it has seaped out to others around her.
39:14.224 --> 39:15.325
[SPEAKER_01]: They want what she has.
39:15.485 --> 39:16.646
[SPEAKER_01]: They know something's different.
39:17.426 --> 39:20.148
[SPEAKER_01]: and then she begins to change them, you know?
39:21.068 --> 39:24.270
[SPEAKER_01]: In the way that joy is contagious, and hedonia is contagious.
39:24.930 --> 39:37.917
[SPEAKER_01]: I do a lot of corporates speaking, and I tell you, walk into the organization, you can tell what the leaders like, because you walk in and people are like, hey, another one of these wellness talks, you're like, oh, the leadership must be really gonna happen, right?
39:38.257 --> 39:43.120
[SPEAKER_01]: But you walk in and they're like, hey, another one of these wellness talks, you're like, oh, the leaders is joyful, right?
39:45.021 --> 39:48.564
[SPEAKER_01]: It's so interesting how Anadonia and Joy are contagious.
39:49.105 --> 39:54.950
[SPEAKER_00]: It reminds me of like, you know, you have one over a cheaper on the team and it doesn't say the productivity of the team goes way up by like 30%.
39:55.070 --> 39:55.470
[SPEAKER_00]: Right.
39:55.751 --> 40:02.717
[SPEAKER_00]: But the same is of an under a cheaper, the team dropped and so I love that.
40:03.458 --> 40:06.921
[SPEAKER_00]: So I'm so happy that I got to squeeze in time with you.
40:06.941 --> 40:08.362
[SPEAKER_00]: You brought me joy today.
40:08.522 --> 40:11.425
[SPEAKER_00]: So where can listeners find you and find your work?
40:12.288 --> 40:17.870
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm on all the socials, of course, and she's very, very entertaining guys.
40:18.511 --> 40:20.191
[SPEAKER_01]: Dr. Judith Joseph, M.O.
40:20.211 --> 40:25.874
[SPEAKER_01]: website, same thing, Dr. Judith Joseph, and you can get my book high-functioning where all books are sold.
40:26.794 --> 40:29.675
[SPEAKER_00]: Thank you so much, it was amazing to speak with you today.
40:29.956 --> 40:31.976
[SPEAKER_01]: Thank you for having me this prompt me so much joy.
40:32.136 --> 40:35.058
[SPEAKER_00]: If you took one thing from Judith today, let it be this.
40:35.882 --> 40:39.045
[SPEAKER_00]: Looking fine and being fine are not the same thing.
40:39.465 --> 40:42.567
[SPEAKER_00]: And you are allowed to want more than just functioning.
40:43.168 --> 40:48.672
[SPEAKER_00]: Find Dr. Judas at Dr. Judas Joseph.com and on TikTok and Instagram.
40:48.872 --> 40:50.334
[SPEAKER_00]: At Dr. Judas Joseph.
40:50.614 --> 40:59.221
[SPEAKER_00]: Find me at Dr.Somee.com and at dr.Somee on Instagram, Facebook and YouTube.
40:59.301 --> 41:02.844
[SPEAKER_00]: Thanks for tuning in and let's continue to disrupt together.