Steph Suganami

WEBVTT
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This episode is brought to you by Coco Kind.
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They've built a brand rooted in transparency, care, and creating products that truly support your skin.
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It's the kind of mission we're always excited to stand by here at AAGC.
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So thank you to Coco Kind for partnering with us and supporting this episode.
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Hello, this is Undefinable on AAGC Originals Podcast.
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Hi, Kara.
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Hi, Jenna.
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How are you?
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I'm good.
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You've got an OG bubble, AGC t-shirt on that I am loving right now.
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This is OG OG.
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Oh wait, I realize our listeners can't see, but it's the the OG bubble t-shirt, which by the way, I have obviously a lot of AAGC merch.
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This is the one that I get complimented on the most.
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Really?
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All the time.
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All the time, people ask me.
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And I'm always like, it's OG.
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But we did re-release it at some point.
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Is it available?
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Did we?
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I should know this.
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We did.
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We did.
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Okay.
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Because it was a pandemic time with like the tie-dye and the whole thing.
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Did you people were tie-dyeing out?
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Did you tie-dye?
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I absolutely did not tie-dye.
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I was also not a tie-dyer, but I did see it was like the sourdough into the tie-dye.
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Didn't do either.
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Yes.
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Me neither.
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All I did was sit on my couch and watch reality TV.
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Yeah, exactly.
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And Zoom with friends.
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Speaking of sitting on the couch doing nothing, our guest today absolutely does everything.
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Oh my gosh.
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She really does do everything.
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I'm ready to hear this intro.
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I'm yes, I had to shorten this by a lot, just so you guys know, because she is a woman of many, many trades.
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Stephanie Tsunami, aka Steph Schap, as many people know her.
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She's here today.
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Yay! Um, she's an actor and a climate advocate, currently starring in the Opus A24 film directed by Mark Anthony Green.
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This film premiered at the Sundance Film Festival and hit theaters in March of 2025.
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Her additional credits include Amazon Something from Tiffany's with Zoe Deutsch and Shay Mitchell, and produced by Hello Sunshine.
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She'll next appear in the indie Theater is dead from Catherine Dudas and recently wrapped the Hulu pilot group chat alongside Kim Kardashian.
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On TV, she recurred on PowerBook 2.
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And uh beyond acting, she's built a major digital following while advancing climate work with organizations, including the Climate Reality Project, founded by Al Gore.
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We're gonna get into that.
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So fascinating.
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She's amazing and gorgeous.
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Stunning.
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Actually stunning.
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I have to her profile is the most perfect profile I've ever seen.
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I'm intimidated.
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She has the perfect face.
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I'm excited.
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Let's get into it.
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Hi, Steph.
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Hi.
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Welcome.
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Thank you.
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Hi, go in a podcast voice.
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Hi.
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Thank you so much for having me.
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Thanks so much for being here with us.
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Thank you for coming today.
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We're so excited to have you.
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Oh, I'm so excited to be here.
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Thank you guys.
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You're uh I I'm so excited to meet you for the first time because we never met before.
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And I feel like all these friends have spoken so highly of you, and so I'm just excited to share.
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Great.
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Sharing.
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Awesome.
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Sharing is caring.
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Sharing is caring, my favorite thing.
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This is gonna be so much fun.
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I I want to start and I want to know what little Steph was like.
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Oh my gosh.
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That's a really great question to start.
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Little Steph.
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I think I was like a brat, you know, enough.
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Like a loving, like in a loving way.
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I definitely was bratty.
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I definitely was bossy.
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It's like I didn't know how to handle my type A-ness.
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So it just came out as like bossiness, which it does.
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Um I was really, I was.
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I like to think, um, I think my mom would say I was really fun.
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Like she said I was like really funny and like just a good time, which I think is still true.
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Yeah, I hope it's still true.
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And also that's such a fun compliment to get from your parents.
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She was like, we had so much fun.
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She's like, you just like were always laughing.
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I was always, you know, we were just always having fun.
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Like, and that's what I remember.
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I had a ball.
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Like I was just like, you know, entertaining.
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And yeah, I think so.
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Cause it was just my mom and I.
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And so we didn't really have a lot of family, if at all.
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And I so we didn't have like a a busy house, but it was busy with friends.
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Yeah.
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And I wasn't around too many other kids until like I got into school, like, and then you make your own friends.
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But my mom's friends, like I was kind of raised by this tribe of women.
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Oh, um that.
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And so that like definitely informed just like the way I value my friendships now.
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But I think, you know, I was kind of like their little doll.
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Because it was a bunch of like, you know, well, there was a bunch of like lesbian women, they're all in their 30s, and like then Uncle Kenny, who was the gay guy that lived down the street, they kind of all found each other in like rural Ohio, you know, which if you can imagine.
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Yeah.
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And so this just incredible group of women kind of raised me, and I was the only kid, you know.
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And so I just got doted on and passed around and loved on and always looked fabulous.
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Always had, you know, always with an outfit, an accessory, a thing, you know.
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Oh my gosh, that sounds like the dream.
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I know.
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Really?
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That sounds awesome.
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Do you feel like you were like a mature kid because you were raised by like a tribe of adults?
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Definitely, yeah.
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And how did that like inform who you are?
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And like you said, your fr you're a village now.
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Yeah, well, I think, yes, I definitely grew up quicker and because and also no one was like really treating me like a kid, which I kind of like appreciated.
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Yeah.
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I always remember, yeah, just feeling like I was just like, those are my people, you know.
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I didn't know any different.
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Totally.
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From seeing those relationships, I have like a different like way that I view my friendships.
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I like am not the kind of person that can have like, I don't want to say like someone says like the friends you put on a shelf.
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Like you just have a bunch of friends and they're just like your friends, and you see them like I'm very invested in my friendships.
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And I've had to learn to like navigate that as an adult because I've realized that not every friendship is gonna be the same and you can't invest the, you know, there's just it's just been a lot of learning because all I saw was like, oh, when you have friends or your family, this is it, and that's it.
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Right.
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And you ride for them and you and my mom was that invested sometimes to a fault where I can see now, you know, like you gotta let people live their lives.
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Yeah.
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You have to protect yourself.
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Yeah.
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And so I've had to learn that.
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And I think I have, which I feel proud of that evolution.
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But I I yeah, I consider I consider my friends family, and I I I consider myself to be a good friend because that's all I've ever known.
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And I still, I mean, I still don't have family.
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So if my friends are listening, you guys are it for me.
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So chosen family.
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Chosen family.
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Yeah.
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What were you like growing up, like in school and activity-wise?
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Like, what did you want to be when you were growing up?
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Was it clear to you?
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My mom always said that I wanted to be a cashier.
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And I have like at a specific store.
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No, just a cashier.
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She loves money all.
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I was like very, very focused on that.
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Like I I remember my girlfriend, like like the neighbor girl, my best friend Jackie.
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She her dad had money, and so he got her like a real cash register.
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And I only had like the bullshit like plastic one.
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And then like and then she had it was like, it was a full size.
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Like it was cute.
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Metal, like metal with the drawer, with the with the thing.
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There's nothing there.
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It was like from the store.
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There is nothing dreamier than a kid having a real cash.
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I was so jealous.
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But every time I went over to your house, I'd be like, hey, like, I want to get that cash.
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And when you would play store, would you be like, well, I have to be the owner or I'll be the customer?
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No, a thrill and delight to click, click, clack on the little and I wanted the long nails, the long acrylic nails to click, click, click on it.
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And I was so that I just that was like my first memory of like, okay, I know what I'm gonna do.
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Um and so I was really hyper-fixated on that for a while.
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And then I think I only ever wanted to like be a performer.
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Like I started dance at a very young age.
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I think I was like three, and I was the smallest little kid in the class, and I just loved it so much.
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And that's just what I fell into.
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And I didn't ever think of anything else.
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Like I was like, oh, I'm gonna be a performer, I'm gonna do Broadway, I'm gonna dance.
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And then as I got older, I was like, oh, I'm gonna be on tour with Britney Spears and like I'm gonna be a pussycat doll.
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And you know what I mean?
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Like very like early 2000s, like influence.
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But yeah, I always I always wanted to perform and I was a pretty good student, naturally.
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And then as I got older, I kind of prioritized like extracurriculars more.
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Yeah.
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Like just like social extracurriculars.
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Um but I was a very active kid.
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I was doing all the things, and God bless my mom, she was driving me around from you know all over Tarnation to do every club and dance class and cheerleading and all of that stuff.
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So I was I like to be in the mix.
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Yeah.
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Yeah.
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A woman of all trades is what I like to call you.
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Yes, thank you.
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Okay, clearly from the start.
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Yeah.
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Okay, take me on the trajectory then.
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You grew up in Ohio, rural town.
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How many Asian people were around you growing up?
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I was thinking about this when I was coming in here.
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I had one Asian friend and then she moved in like fourth grade.
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It was really sad.
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Um and then there was a family who was a they were very close to me and my mom.
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They were she was um, her dad was I think a quarter Japanese and then half black or some some mix of that nature.
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And that was she was one of my really good friends.
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That's really sick.
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So we're counting quarters, you know, where we're out here in these streets.
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It's like an eighth plus a quarter.
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No, like I'm like, there she was.
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Yeah, yeah.
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Yeah, that was it.
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And my mom was white, so I didn't even grow up with an Asian parent.
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So yeah, it's interesting when I have conversations even with people like now, you know, I do feel like, oh, I don't really like my upbringing is like casseroles.
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You know what I mean?
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Like I'm Midwest and I am very jealous to that I didn't get to grow up with all of like the beautiful cultures and tr culture and tradition.
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But like I do love casseroles, so yeah, I grew I'm a girl from Long Island with two white parents, so I get it.
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You know what I mean?
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Yeah, so you get it.
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For sure.
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Yeah.
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But did you feel like it isolated you or it made you more of a part?
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Like it made it less hard having white parents, like because I feel like I I didn't have to like lean so deeply into my Asian roots because I had a white family with casseroles, you know, right, right for a long time.
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Yeah, I didn't realize, like as a kid, you don't know like until you're told that you're different, you know what I mean?
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So it never occurred to me like, oh, I look different than my mom because uh you just wouldn't know that's your mom.
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Yeah, it's my mom.
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Yeah.
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So it wasn't until I was older when I was getting like kind of picked on and and called out like by kids for looking different that I was like, oh, wait, what do you mean?
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Okay, hold on.
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Let me let me let me check some things out here.
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And I think I then began rejecting it immediately.
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Like, I'm not different, guys.
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Swear to God, I'm like you.
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Like I'm the same.
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Look, I like what you like, I like that too.
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That's my favorite color.
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Come over for casserole.
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You know what I mean?
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Like and so I I I leaned into just trying to fit in.
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And so I think part of that like was a great like skill of being able to adapt in different situations.
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I also feel like I wasn't able to like fully form my grounded sense of self because I was just like, oh, I like that too.
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Because I I didn't feel like I could like something on my own.
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We were adapting, you know what I mean?
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Because I didn't want to just be then, you don't like that, and I'm different.
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Like shit.
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I can't have two strikes against me.
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Yeah.
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So I think I rejected it.
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And my mom tried her best to when I was little to like uh keep some of the things that she could she she's never even been to Japan, you know what I mean?
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So, like what can she do?
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What can she do in the middle of rural Ohio?
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We don't even have like a a restaurant that we could go to, you know what I mean, to even so she tried, and you know, my dad he always lived in Japan and had his life there.
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So he would kind of try to like send a Christmas gift here and there, but then it's also like there's such a cultural divide, and like it wasn't the way that we can connect so easily now on Zoom or a FaceTime.
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It was like letters and like, you know, he can't, he couldn't really speak English to talk to a kid.
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So it was just like their hardest, but then when you become a uh, you know, a preteen teen, you're like, please, like I wanna listen to Britney Spears.
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I do not want to know about whatever, like cultural, cultural thing, like please, mom, this is not the time.
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And and I just yeah, I just wanted to fit in.
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So I definitely I rejected it for a really long time and didn't have find any association.
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Also, I just didn't have that connection.
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Yeah.
00:13:23.039 --> 00:13:26.320
And a lack of access, like you were saying at that time as well, you know?
00:13:26.559 --> 00:13:29.360
Yes, how exactly how, where where am I going?
00:13:29.440 --> 00:13:32.159
And I didn't have like the internet, you know, like it was it was weird.
00:13:32.559 --> 00:13:40.000
What a time like, excuse me, no FaceTime for the last of the Mohicans.
00:13:40.159 --> 00:13:40.879
Oh my gosh.
00:13:41.200 --> 00:13:42.799
You did change your last name though.
00:13:43.039 --> 00:13:43.600
I did.
00:13:43.919 --> 00:13:45.840
So what was that journey like?
00:13:45.919 --> 00:13:51.200
Because you, you know, you went from rejection to this like massive identity shift.
00:13:51.519 --> 00:13:52.960
Yeah, versus a lot of therapy.
00:13:53.039 --> 00:13:54.399
Yeah, it's a lot of therapy.
00:13:54.559 --> 00:13:58.399
It's a lot of wanting to like make up for lost time, I think.
00:13:58.559 --> 00:14:03.440
I think for 30 years of my life, I rejected it completely.
00:14:03.679 --> 00:14:11.759
And I feel like where I am and to want to be exactly who I am and love who I am in my entirety.
00:14:11.919 --> 00:14:15.200
Like I I can't not recognize that part of myself.
00:14:15.279 --> 00:14:24.320
And I think because I felt like the this is like such a I don't know, like the world definitely doesn't have an opinion of me, but as you're growing up, you think the world has an opinion of you.
00:14:24.480 --> 00:14:42.480
And and I wanted to like show the world like a different, I I wanted to claim it to the world, not just like for me personally, building a relationship with my dad, doing all of that stuff, learning more about the culture, actually going and visiting and like appreciating it on like a private and personal level.
00:14:42.639 --> 00:14:53.039
But I think that outward like proclamation of like I this is part of who I am, and I want to claim that to the world was really important to me after being so ashamed for so long.
00:14:53.120 --> 00:14:54.159
It's a lot like a lot of shame.
00:14:54.240 --> 00:14:58.159
Like I think when you have shame, my therapist, we just talked about this.
00:14:58.399 --> 00:15:00.960
She was like, I'm like, how do you get over it?
00:15:01.120 --> 00:15:05.600
And she's like, you talk about it and like you don't keep it in the shadows.
00:15:05.919 --> 00:15:08.000
You like demystify the secret behind it.
00:15:08.399 --> 00:15:20.399
And so you're so so I'm like, oh, okay, so if I I'm just gonna put this out there, like there is no questioning, like I'm claiming this, and I'm not gonna let the shame I have like fester inside of me.
00:15:20.480 --> 00:15:24.799
So I really, yeah, and you know, he I don't know if my dad really cares.
00:15:24.960 --> 00:15:25.919
He was kind of like, okay.
00:15:26.399 --> 00:15:28.320
Yeah, I I hope it meant something to him.
00:15:28.480 --> 00:15:34.879
It's hard still to have, you know, we have a close enough relationship that I think we can that I feel good about.
00:15:35.200 --> 00:15:37.120
So yeah, most important, you know.
00:15:37.679 --> 00:15:37.919
Yeah.
00:15:38.159 --> 00:15:39.200
Okay, real question.
00:15:39.519 --> 00:15:43.519
Why do we all have separate cleansers for our face and body in the first place?
00:15:43.919 --> 00:15:46.720
So most of the time it comes down to how products are made.
00:15:47.039 --> 00:15:51.200
Body washes are often produced in bigger quantities with lower cost ingredients.
00:15:51.600 --> 00:15:56.960
That is why I've been really into Coco Kine's new milky soft face and body cleanser.
00:15:57.200 --> 00:16:06.399
They approached it differently by creating something that's actually formulated like a facial cleanser, but in a bigger bottle, so it works for both your body and your face.
00:16:06.879 --> 00:16:14.720
It's this gentle milky formula that lathers softly and supports your skin barrier with ceramides and leaves your skin feeling clean but never stripped.
00:16:15.120 --> 00:16:20.159
I have been using this every day, and honestly, my whole household has gotten into it.
00:16:20.399 --> 00:16:25.039
Husband, kids, babies, which says a lot about how gentle it actually is.
00:16:25.279 --> 00:16:29.360
I love that I get to use one thing for both my face and my body.
00:16:29.600 --> 00:16:36.159
It is 13.5 ounces, so you're not feeling precious about using it, and you can find it online and in stores nationwide.
00:16:36.399 --> 00:16:37.440
Thanks, Coco Gind.
00:16:38.000 --> 00:16:43.519
Okay, I have to know about your admiration for Al Gore.
00:16:44.000 --> 00:16:45.519
Yes, that did make into the bio.
00:16:46.080 --> 00:16:47.200
Speak to the cleaners.
00:16:47.440 --> 00:16:47.679
Oh my god.
00:16:48.000 --> 00:16:59.039
Well, you're an incredible advocate for an environmentalist and you're on a million boards and an ambassador and you've co-founded Future Earth, but I need to know the start of like the Al Gore story.
00:17:00.000 --> 00:17:00.240
Yes.
00:17:00.399 --> 00:17:01.919
Um well he's awesome.
00:17:02.879 --> 00:17:08.559
And um I watched, do you you know the documentary An Inconvenient Truth?
00:17:08.880 --> 00:17:09.440
Yes.
00:17:09.759 --> 00:17:14.640
I had seen it, and then I think I watched it later on, like more of as an adult.
00:17:14.799 --> 00:17:18.880
And I was like, oh, you guys, like someone should be talking about this.
00:17:19.039 --> 00:17:23.359
Like, should we more people talking about the guys?
00:17:23.680 --> 00:17:24.960
Like, do you know what's happening?
00:17:25.279 --> 00:17:27.680
And I was just so deeply moved.
00:17:27.759 --> 00:17:30.720
And like I he also was just like a household name, like growing up, right?
00:17:30.799 --> 00:17:39.440
Like Algorandipper, like I like, you know, like I I guess I consider myself like a kid of like the Clinton era, like that like is what I recall.
00:17:39.519 --> 00:17:42.960
And so his name was just always like in my household.
00:17:43.039 --> 00:17:43.359
Yeah.
00:17:43.519 --> 00:17:48.960
And so watching that and then just like being shocked and concerned.
00:17:49.119 --> 00:18:10.240
Um, they generally um so he has this uh organization called the Climate Reality Project, and they host these conferences that are basically like just a weekend long where you learn everything there is to know that they could possibly share about what like just climate education.
00:18:10.319 --> 00:18:11.599
Like, what is the climate crisis?
00:18:11.680 --> 00:18:12.960
Like what is global warming?
00:18:13.039 --> 00:18:19.599
Like, how is it affecting us right now, like here and now in with our health and our neighborhoods and our, you know, our community and everything.
00:18:19.680 --> 00:18:31.839
And serendipitously, there happened to be the LA training, like literally later that month after I'd watched it when I was on this like deep dive of like, you know, when you like oh yeah, it's like it was like I'm a cashier, now I'm like in environmental studies.
00:18:32.000 --> 00:18:34.400
So like I just was like hyper focused on it.
00:18:34.559 --> 00:18:36.720
And I was like, I'm gonna do this for me.
00:18:36.799 --> 00:18:40.000
And I got my little notebook and I went down to the convention center by myself.
00:18:40.319 --> 00:18:47.039
And I remember sitting there and I was watching him give this incredible presentation, and I was like, okay, I gotta get to this man.
00:18:47.200 --> 00:18:48.960
Like I'm gonna, I need to work with him.
00:18:49.039 --> 00:18:51.039
I wanna support him, like I'm gonna figure it out.
00:18:51.119 --> 00:18:56.880
And then I somehow weasel my way in there and I was like, hey, like I think you're awesome.
00:18:57.119 --> 00:18:58.400
Like what can I do?
00:18:58.480 --> 00:19:09.119
And it was when like social media was kind of just taking off in a way that like we were communicating things other than like, you know, our lunches with like whatever the Valencia filter.
00:19:09.200 --> 00:19:23.359
And so I was like, you know, so I was like, Oh, maybe I could use this social platform I have from like being adjacent to like the work that I used to do and being in entertainment to like talk about something important because that is just important.
00:19:23.680 --> 00:19:30.480
And it was important to me, you know, because all of the things, the fashion, the beauty, the all that stuff, that's so much fun.
00:19:30.559 --> 00:19:36.319
But like I was like, there are things bigger things that I would like to talk about.
00:19:36.480 --> 00:19:39.759
And so yeah, I started working with the climate reality project.
00:19:39.920 --> 00:19:47.200
They asked me to, we raised like a pretty significant amount of money for climate education, my husband and I, for that organization.
00:19:47.279 --> 00:19:55.279
And they asked me to be on the board and I get to go and talk at different trainings about using social media to like help your mission.
00:19:55.440 --> 00:19:58.880
And I just get to meet incredible people who do this work every day.
00:19:59.039 --> 00:20:02.240
Like, I do not claim to be an activist in any way, shape, or form.
00:20:02.400 --> 00:20:11.599
I just feel like I'm a concerned citizen who like wants to like use whatever skill set I have to like help solve this in some sort of way.
00:20:11.680 --> 00:20:13.920
And I think that's like the whole point.
00:20:14.079 --> 00:20:16.400
Like, we all have different things that we can do.
00:20:16.480 --> 00:20:20.640
And if we just kind of apply what we can give, then hopefully like something will happen.
00:20:20.880 --> 00:20:23.759
Um I would call you more than just a concerned citizen.
00:20:23.920 --> 00:20:24.319
That's nice.
00:20:24.400 --> 00:20:25.200
I am citizens.
00:20:25.279 --> 00:20:32.240
I love a concerned citizen and concerned citizen really is good at execution, has executed.
00:20:32.559 --> 00:20:45.599
You know, I mean it's so inspiring because, like you were saying, to be able to use your platform for something that is bigger and something like climate education, where I feel like it is the education part that is so important because most people just don't know.
00:20:45.920 --> 00:20:46.640
They don't know what they want to do.
00:20:46.799 --> 00:20:50.480
And when you the more you know, like the better you can choices you can make for yourself.
00:20:50.559 --> 00:20:53.599
And you know, I think that really is like the catalyst for change.
00:20:53.680 --> 00:21:04.000
And I think that's the whole, you know, mission behind the climate reality project is just like organizing community and like spreading the information so that like something can happen.
00:21:04.160 --> 00:21:05.039
Please, God.
00:21:06.559 --> 00:21:07.680
Something's gonna happen.
00:21:08.720 --> 00:21:08.960
Yeah.
00:21:09.359 --> 00:21:12.160
Speaking of raises, you co-founded a company recently.
00:21:12.559 --> 00:21:18.079
Also, I'm exhausted just talking about your your life because oh, I am so tired.
00:21:19.200 --> 00:21:20.799
We're truly really impressive.
00:21:21.839 --> 00:21:24.400
Uh Lil Love Dog you co-founded with Kara Santa.
00:21:24.799 --> 00:21:25.440
I did, yes.
00:21:25.680 --> 00:21:29.200
Um, you have a dog with the most violent name.
00:21:29.599 --> 00:21:30.319
Binxy.
00:21:31.200 --> 00:21:33.279
Well, Sir Bingsington, John Bon, Jovi Jackson.
00:21:33.440 --> 00:21:33.839
Yeah, exactly.
00:21:34.960 --> 00:21:42.480
Tell me about this company, how you formulated this idea, how it came to you, and then like what has this experience been like?
00:21:42.720 --> 00:21:44.400
I guess you have raised before.
00:21:44.720 --> 00:21:50.880
So raising for this is not so new, but like I would just love to hear about the whole experience and it's so fucking hard.
00:21:51.119 --> 00:21:51.680
It's so hard.
00:21:51.759 --> 00:21:52.160
It's so hard.
00:21:52.240 --> 00:21:55.359
It's so hard and like not to play the woman card, but I'm gonna play it.
00:21:55.440 --> 00:21:59.680
Like there's just not as many, like the money's just not really going to the female founded.
00:22:00.480 --> 00:22:03.279
companies in the same way that it's going to other companies.
00:22:03.519 --> 00:22:07.680
But my co-founder, Kara Santanoleto, is she is incredibly smart.
00:22:07.839 --> 00:22:17.039
And I feel so lucky to be able to have someone who not only has like past experience but just has such high ambitions for what this can be.
00:22:17.519 --> 00:22:20.160
And it's so nice to have a partner in this.
00:22:20.240 --> 00:22:22.079
I don't I know I couldn't do it by myself.
00:22:22.240 --> 00:22:24.799
And that's just who I am as like an entrepreneur and as a person.
00:22:24.880 --> 00:22:26.640
I like having a collaborative relationship.
00:22:26.880 --> 00:22:27.200
For sure.
00:22:27.359 --> 00:22:29.759
And I think like I don't know everything.
00:22:29.920 --> 00:22:32.160
And I'm not going to sit here to claim to know everything.
00:22:32.240 --> 00:22:37.359
And so I feel really lucky that the things that I are maybe my weaknesses are her strengths and vice versa.
00:22:37.519 --> 00:22:47.759
And so we can really use each other in that way and use each other to kind of distribute the the pressure and and all of the responsibility because it's it's quite a lot.
00:22:48.160 --> 00:22:50.480
And we're we're we founded Little Love Dog.
00:22:50.559 --> 00:22:53.279
It's it's our clean beauty brand for dogs.
00:22:53.519 --> 00:23:11.440
In my work with the Climate Reality Project, learning about environmental regulations and even like working with the environmental working group and we're and learning about product safety like household or even beauty, clean beauty and stuff like that, like the chemicals and the things that are allowed here are not in some other places.
00:23:11.599 --> 00:23:18.079
And so I, you know, we thought why wouldn't we want something clean for our pets?
00:23:18.160 --> 00:23:22.880
Like these are the loves of our life like my full child that is my son.
00:23:23.039 --> 00:23:23.519
Yes.
00:23:23.680 --> 00:23:29.920
He is my firstborn my soulmate my angel I'm also a mother of two I'm a mother of two.
00:23:30.319 --> 00:23:31.279
You get it I get it.
00:23:31.359 --> 00:23:34.319
Yeah Jenna is an actual well I can't wait that's not wrong.
00:23:34.799 --> 00:23:39.599
No you were also a mother all mothers excuse me.
00:23:39.839 --> 00:23:40.160
Okay.
00:23:40.480 --> 00:23:41.440
It's so serious.
00:23:41.759 --> 00:23:42.240
I get it.
00:23:42.559 --> 00:23:50.559
And you know I it's like we're being thoughtful about what we're using for our home and our like human babies and our beauty products and ourselves.
00:23:50.720 --> 00:23:51.680
Like are you kidding me?
00:23:51.839 --> 00:23:57.599
Like I need the best for him and I don't think pet parents realize how underregulated products are.
00:23:57.920 --> 00:24:01.119
We're just seeing the clean beauty wave really hit like its peak.
00:24:01.279 --> 00:24:02.160
It's taken time.
00:24:02.319 --> 00:24:05.599
We're seeing what Honest did and coterie did for Clean Baby.
00:24:05.759 --> 00:24:07.920
We're seeing you know what Blue Land did for home.
00:24:08.000 --> 00:24:17.440
And I really think pet is this next frontier because millennials and Gen Z are having more dogs and kids and we are spending more on our dogs.
00:24:17.599 --> 00:24:27.119
And I think that there's a real opportunity here to change you know the the baseline for what's acceptable for these sweet little angels in our life.
00:24:27.279 --> 00:24:36.319
And so that was kind of like the it was love and just care that was really how we wanted to start this business just out of love and care for our own our own pets.
00:24:36.559 --> 00:24:46.319
And is Kara just a friend of yours or do you guys yeah we've been friends we've met like around the way you know like you meet people like who know like at an event somewhere here and I don't even remember anymore.
00:24:46.640 --> 00:24:58.400
We even were like 10 years ago and yeah we became really fast friends and she's the only friend that I think I could go into business with because there's just such a understanding and respect that we have.
00:24:58.640 --> 00:25:01.039
It's really hard working with your friends.
00:25:02.799 --> 00:25:12.720
And I'm like it is and it is and so there has to be a real solid foundation and respect and communication and like I have that with her.
00:25:12.880 --> 00:25:13.039
Yeah.
00:25:13.119 --> 00:25:16.319
And so yeah because real realistically you can't work with everybody.
00:25:16.880 --> 00:25:19.680
Like if you're a friend group you're like no I definitely cannot work with this person.
00:25:20.000 --> 00:25:24.960
I can barely travel with some of my friends literally you learn a lot oh my God by traveling with somebody.
00:25:25.440 --> 00:25:28.559
So much a lot acceptance is what you mean.
00:25:28.880 --> 00:25:35.759
Truly you're like okay yeah it's also crazy how like different people bring out such different sides of yourself to like the dynamics.
00:25:35.839 --> 00:25:39.759
Every time one person is switched out in or out it changes the dynamic of everything.
00:25:40.000 --> 00:25:40.160
Yeah.
00:25:40.240 --> 00:25:45.920
You know and yeah I mean friends you live with friends you work with I mean those are all very different categories.
00:25:46.400 --> 00:25:48.880
Really make sure that you're you're like you know what you're doing.
00:25:48.960 --> 00:25:50.720
And also like you don't want to ruin a friendship.
00:25:50.880 --> 00:25:51.359
Exactly.
00:25:51.599 --> 00:26:02.000
But yeah it's been great and we have two products coming out this year that we're really excited about just to kind of expand further and just really trying to be as thoughtful and intentional as we can.
00:26:02.240 --> 00:26:25.440
Wow wow this is exciting it's very exciting very very exciting congratulations I know every pet parent is like yeah I'll spend whenever you ask me to I will spend for sitting here thinking about all the products I use on my dogs right now being like I need to go home and look at all this clear it out throw it out throw it out package is coming your way dude the babies it's just and like I get to like work with dogs like what do you mean?
00:26:25.759 --> 00:26:39.759
I know and like we like we have um a rescue that we partner with every quarter and it's like so then I get to like help what do you mean like you guys are the cutest too the website uh your board or your like whole like C-suite is all your dogs.
00:26:40.160 --> 00:26:40.640
Stop it.
00:26:40.799 --> 00:26:42.000
The photos are the dogs.
00:26:42.160 --> 00:26:42.880
I'm dead.
00:26:43.119 --> 00:26:47.759
I was like this is the best for the thing I think things is like VP of fluff or something like that.
00:26:48.559 --> 00:26:49.440
It's really cute.
00:26:49.920 --> 00:26:52.480
Wait is this just uh is it only dog specific?
00:26:52.720 --> 00:27:20.240
Well you can use our first product is dry shampoo and so you can use it on any of your pets it's safe for cats as well we just have our focus on on dogs jobs we have yeah got it yeah got it who knows somebody might have a gerbil you know you know what I'm saying get some treasure makes you happy the money chillas I don't know guinea pigs you never know man oh my gosh I can't wait to see all right I gotta go back because I have to know the journey from Ohio to Hollywood.
00:27:20.319 --> 00:27:28.480
Oh okay yeah and like how you got into the entertainment space and acting and like where did this all like how did this all line up for you?
00:27:28.960 --> 00:27:32.319
That's really such a loading question.
00:27:32.640 --> 00:27:37.039
Loaded question we've got time we've got time this lineup for me.
00:27:37.279 --> 00:27:53.599
So I wanted to pursue dance and I thought LA was the place um and so my mom and I packed up my Kia sportage drove across the country I came out here to I literally wanted to be a pussycat doll like I still kind of do.
00:27:53.920 --> 00:28:06.000
Honestly you're really like you literally could be thank you so much yeah I would follow you too you know what it's maybe it's not too late.
00:28:06.079 --> 00:28:07.920
I don't know it's never too late.
00:28:08.000 --> 00:28:21.519
These knees these knees um they're not allowing the movement um but I yeah I wanted to be a pussycat doll I wanted to dance I um moved out here didn't really know a soul kind of couch surfed for quite some time.
00:28:21.759 --> 00:28:22.240
How old were you?
00:28:22.880 --> 00:28:23.680
I was 19.
00:28:23.920 --> 00:28:50.880
Wow oh my gosh yeah and it's so funny because I you don't realize like how out of your depths you are you know especially when you're 19 but now and and I remember one of the last conversations I had with my mom we were at my home that I live in now and I was like God do you remember that apartment I had some some person I worked with at Gold's gym gave me a mattress and I had hand me down turquoise sheets.
00:28:50.960 --> 00:28:58.960
I mean they were bright teal like you know like I had one of those you know put together shelves from Target as my dresser.
00:28:59.039 --> 00:29:21.519
I mean I was just getting by with like yes skin by literally and had literally no money to my name and I thought I was just crushing it because I was in LA and I was I was go go dancing at you know like the gay bars and like my people dancing I had a gig I was like I was I thought I thought I was like I'm living it.
00:29:21.920 --> 00:29:44.880
I mean to be honest at 19 at 19 you kind of were crushing it thrilled like thrilled and my mom was like you know and she came to visit me God bless her slept on that mattress with me you know and she was like yeah I go isn't that crazy she goes you know honey I remember visiting you and I thought I don't know if she's gonna make it out here and I was like what do you mean?
00:29:45.119 --> 00:30:10.720
I'm like you didn't say anything she never led on she never was like do you like not even putting the stuff not once and I just thought it was so funny because obviously she's an adult and she's looking at me and I'm like like look at where we know and she's like oh shit this might not work out like and I just thought that was the funniest thing and I just I don't know I I I because I that was just so not my perception of that time at all.
00:30:11.200 --> 00:30:17.519
But yeah I wanted to dance and I then I quickly realized like oh like this is crazy.
00:30:17.680 --> 00:30:21.519
It's uh to be a dancer in this business it's so wildly difficult.
00:30:22.000 --> 00:30:30.640
Not that we all picked anything easier but truly that I mean a cattle call for 400 dancers to get three jobs you know or three positions.
00:30:30.880 --> 00:30:35.680
It's just I was like also like you were saying the physical like oh the physical demands and it's your whole day.
00:30:35.839 --> 00:30:37.279
Yeah you're at an audition.
00:30:37.359 --> 00:30:50.160
I remember being down in the valley wherever we were 400 people and just you're sitting there just waiting for your minute of the combo that you get to show and then they'd be like all right and then you're like well that was my day.
00:30:50.319 --> 00:30:51.680
Yeah I mean it's brutal.
00:30:51.839 --> 00:30:55.119
I have the utmost respect for dancers in this business.
00:30:55.279 --> 00:30:55.440
Yeah.
00:30:55.599 --> 00:31:46.160
But my type A ass quickly realized that I was gonna need a paycheck because I didn't have I I needed you know I only had my go-go money and I it wasn't really it's not that much you know and so I go money my go-go money kind of loved go-going it was so much fun um I mean that's pretty never it's never too late I think the knees could do it I I literally say all the time I'm like damn do you think they'd let me pick up a shift like do you think I could just like go back you know just for a night like just the rush they would be like please I literally don't even think I would have it in my bones and like I don't even know if my bot like we moved that way and yeah like I don't even know like if I could find it and they would be like this girl is dancing like 15 years ago like what are these moves ma'am?
00:31:46.720 --> 00:31:59.440
I think it's like I think it's like riding a bike although your 19 year olds off you were like I got this 100% I was like I am crushing like what do you mean I lights are dim.
00:31:59.680 --> 00:32:04.640
Let's go that 19 year old energy is like what we still need.
00:32:04.799 --> 00:32:20.960
Like we still need to take that I need the fearlessness riding it right yes I think about that too it's like how you were saying you know now we're older and if we were to look back we're like how were we so fearless to make some of these choices and not think so much.
00:32:21.119 --> 00:32:31.119
I mean as we get older we get crazy more things to get them but we would just I mean I was mopping down Hollywood Boulevard and Jeffrey Campbell's and booty shorts at 130 in the morning without a care in the world.
00:32:31.279 --> 00:32:36.799
Yes girl like safety like I know different times or just like fearlessness.
00:32:37.039 --> 00:32:43.680
Maybe a little bit of both I don't know which one is more but like we'll take it bring I think that fearlessness is exactly right.
00:32:44.000 --> 00:32:47.519
Like I think that like finding that in yourself again.
00:32:47.680 --> 00:33:08.799
Yeah even a little bit yeah you know would serve all of us I think like a hundred percent I because my mom passed in 2020 and after that happened I like completely shifted my perspective on like having fear because I was like oh the worst possible thing that I have feared has happened to me.
00:33:10.000 --> 00:33:12.079
What what else are you like come on?
00:33:12.480 --> 00:33:17.200
Nothing else nothing else in the world could possibly be worse than this.
00:33:17.759 --> 00:33:19.279
So what do I have to fear?
00:33:19.519 --> 00:33:20.000
Right.
00:33:20.319 --> 00:33:34.880
And so that's kind of what shifted me from kind of working behind the scenes and really pursuing something that I always wanted to do but maybe didn't have the confidence and didn't think I would be accepted as that or didn't just didn't think that I could do it.
00:33:34.960 --> 00:33:36.079
And I was like fuck this.
00:33:36.480 --> 00:33:37.440
I don't know if I can curse on you.
00:33:38.000 --> 00:33:47.839
Absolutely but I was like fuck this like I what else do I have to lose like I I I completely it just it really just washed over me and I I didn't fear getting married.
00:33:48.000 --> 00:33:54.799
I didn't fear pursuing my dreams I didn't fear being myself I didn't fear changing my name I did it just was like this complete release.
00:33:55.279 --> 00:34:20.239
Wow and it was really I mean of all of the tiny little things of positivity that you can get from losing the a lifeline it was definitely this big shove this big push into this fearlessness that I try and just move with whenever and at all times if I can you know obviously it's so hard but you know what else are you gonna do?
00:34:20.960 --> 00:35:06.719
We get one you get one trip around you get one shot yeah and we don't even know how long it is so you better you better live you know better live it's like been the worst thing to happen to me and also like I have such a new release on my own life and a new fresh set of eyes that I yeah it's really and it really like the the depths of like heartbreak and grief really like crack open the amount of gratitude that you can feel you know and so that's kind of making this era of my life all the more meaningful and I think um I just like I I deeply appreciate every every little minute totally in such a different way.
00:35:06.960 --> 00:35:14.159
Okay Kara can we talk about this new undefinable crew neck that you're wearing in lavender so good.
00:35:14.559 --> 00:35:18.239
Not even just I'm wearing you're wearing too we're both wearing because it's so good.
00:35:18.559 --> 00:35:36.719
And your hat with the new Asian American Girl Club logo brand new brand new font uh rebrand we're loving it and this is our very own undefinable merch so exciting to wear this out it's the best it's so exciting and it really just makes it feel real.
00:35:37.039 --> 00:35:44.400
Yes I love wearing this out and about I love seeing other people wear it and it's just a really good reminder of like why we do this podcast.
00:35:44.639 --> 00:35:47.920
It's to connect with our listeners connect with our community out there.
00:35:48.159 --> 00:35:55.519
So this is just still my beating heart it's just the best it's so cozy it's so soft.
00:35:55.679 --> 00:37:00.079
So if you want your own you can get it only at Asian American girlclub.com speaking of this like era that you're in or moving into you do so much right like entrepreneur actress advocate wife like this a million things like what is the priority for you or like what do you hope to get out of this like next era of time I hope to just be fulfilled I just want to enjoy my time really like obviously like professionally I want to be successful financially I want to be successful I want you know my husband and I to both live long and healthy lives like clearly priority like I have such a great appreciation for being in good health but I want to like enjoy my time yeah and I want to be myself like simply you know whatever that looks like yeah I just want to enjoy my time and be be myself really it's a great goal honestly it's a great goal it's a really clear goal to me I mean it's layered once you really dig into it like being myself I'm like I'm like already sweating that I'm saying too much on this podcast.
00:37:00.400 --> 00:37:28.400
I'm like oh God you're like oh shit I'm like everyone hates me no but I just want to yeah just like sit in that and just be fulfilled like really have it right like really not just say you are not just feel it but like really and move with that yes yeah and and I and I it's it's work every day you know what I mean and putting yourself in uncomfortable positions every day and tolerating the discomfort and you know another thing I'm working with my therapist.
00:37:28.559 --> 00:37:30.239
Yeah therapy is key.
00:37:30.400 --> 00:38:16.960
Yeah but I just yeah I just want to be myself yeah yeah and also the different versions of ourselves right because we're just constantly changing so much as well and to like keep up with our selves in a way too totally I just like want to be yeah my best self like every day like how am I working to be better and how am I working to like this is so cheesy but just like spread the goodness whether that be through my friendships whether that be through my business whether that be through acting and the stories that I get to tell and making people feel good or making people feel like they can escape or even sharing on social media and making people feel less alone or doing this podcast and talking about these things that like I would normally just keep to myself like connection and and just goodness if I can do that then like awesome so good.
00:38:17.199 --> 00:38:42.000
So good the animals are obviously thinking thinking congratulations on Opus thank you amazing it premiered at Sundance did you get to go I did yeah what a what a I for people like in not in the industry to understand like a film that like gets in to premiere at Sundance it's such an honor like what was what is that like for you just thinking about it.
00:38:42.239 --> 00:39:16.719
It was such a thrill so amazing I mean it was the first film that I'd really done and so to get to have this really big experience was just like I mean it changed my life and it just oh my gosh and and with you know with with Io and John Malkovich and Juliet Lewis and all these like like what a cat just legends and I just got to just soak it all in and watch I really think it was full out of out of body experience the whole time because I truly like look back and I'm like God the beta blocker was not hitting because I was so nervous and just like I did still shaking.
00:39:16.880 --> 00:39:44.239
You know that um that letterbox like for blacked out blacked out oh my gosh in a way no that thank you letterbox for never showing that footage because you guys I was like I think my mouth was gaping open I like was I drooling I don't know but she it's okay it's a fucking easy question stuff.
00:39:44.320 --> 00:42:26.639
It's just four favorite films but the pressure I was like I want to seem you know like I want to see art when really I'm like you know there could be quirky like but then like the ones that the sterest ones that people don't know but then I'm like oh but like the 90s quote we're like the fucking pressure I she she literally she came she ended up being like you don't have to do this she literally saw you like she's because also I was like we need 45 fucking minutes to get it done she's like you don't have to answer and I was like no no no I'm gonna find it I'm gonna find it like as if I'd never seen a film before couldn't even not even one one didn't even I go Twilight you were in a movie with John Malkovich and you were thinking Twilight also Twilight Diana had a girl my God it was just such a nerve-wracking experience that like I I was like texting my I was like please ask them could they just like not release that I just like use IOs like she's so cool like please don't include me I was mortified and because I was so excited about it because it's also such an honor to like be asked these questions and for people to care and be included and so I was like hell yeah like this is my moment fucking boy 45 minutes she was just like staring at me just hoping she was hoping babe like move on oh my God so yeah so that was sun dance for me just basically fucking blackout like I don't like but you have to laugh right I laugh now I was I mean talk about like re rehashing this over I was texting everyone be like you guys this is what I said is this bad so upset just over can we find this some literally honest sweating like but yeah so also say sure it was awesome um no it was it was a great time and I had so much fun on that film and yeah I like did it solidify for you like oh I want to keep doing this because you do you know like I keep saying you do a lot like but it was like you get that taste and you're like oh and then do it again so depressed afterwards oh yes there's always the come down the come down was so hard summer camps gone done done and I'm like what do you mean we're not gonna talk all the time like even doing press I was like oh this is so fun I get to Kiki with you guys and we get to talk about this experience like yeah I was enamored with the entire experience from top to bottom they could have told me to like sleep under my trailer and I would have done it because I was just so happy to be there and yeah and then I was like well now what?
00:42:26.719 --> 00:42:29.679
I'm like what do you mean I had like I it's it's brutal.
00:42:29.840 --> 00:43:34.320
Yeah the withdrawal is always so much it's such a like teachable experience to be an actor in this way for like your confidence being self-assured being uh like as level as you can with this roller coaster of like you're not it maybe maybe maybe nope you're not it you're still not working you're and it's just like you really have to like regulate your emotions in a very controlled and and and and responsible way because you could really fly off the rails because it's so hard to be told like it's not you it's not you it's not you it's not you and you just keep putting your everything into it and it's really quite addicting I've got to say you like it's like see I like they always say we're a little bit masochistic you know everybody chooses this you know because you're we're just experts that rejection and then like just you have to be persistent persistent and slightly delusional and a little narcissistic at times.
00:43:34.639 --> 00:43:59.760
Absolutely let's not a hundred percent there it's definitely there um but yeah I'm so I I can't wait to to to work on something again I can't wait to to be on set again it's just such a thrill yeah yeah it's the best it is really is okay we have a hotline and people write in oh okay and they have questions this is a good one so with social media being such a
00:44:00.239 --> 00:44:01.440
Big part of life now.
00:44:01.679 --> 00:44:04.960
Visibility and identity can start to feel really intertwined.
00:44:05.119 --> 00:44:07.360
You've lived so much of your life publicly online.
00:44:07.679 --> 00:44:10.719
How do you stay connected to your sense of self through that?
00:44:11.039 --> 00:44:11.599
It's hard.
00:44:11.840 --> 00:44:13.199
Sometimes I don't, honestly.
00:44:13.360 --> 00:44:20.000
Sometimes I'm like one mean comment, and I'm like, I'm out for days and I forget exactly who I am.
00:44:20.159 --> 00:44:21.119
So it's hard.
00:44:21.440 --> 00:44:22.960
I definitely don't know.
00:44:23.119 --> 00:44:24.480
I guess you just have to.
00:44:24.559 --> 00:44:25.679
Um, I have to.
00:44:25.920 --> 00:44:27.280
My mom always used to say this to me.
00:44:27.519 --> 00:44:30.239
Every time I would leave the house, she would go, Remember who you are.
00:44:30.639 --> 00:44:34.480
And my friends would like make fun of me because they would like mouth the words as we were leaving.
00:44:35.039 --> 00:44:35.760
So she would always say it.
00:44:36.000 --> 00:44:36.320
Every time.
00:44:36.639 --> 00:44:37.679
Why did she say that?
00:44:37.840 --> 00:44:38.320
I don't know.
00:44:38.480 --> 00:44:38.880
I don't know.
00:44:38.960 --> 00:44:39.599
I wish I could ask.
00:44:40.480 --> 00:44:41.199
But that's what she would say.
00:44:41.360 --> 00:44:44.400
She would go, All right, bunny, remember who you are.
00:44:44.960 --> 00:44:46.960
And my friends would go, you are.
00:44:47.760 --> 00:44:50.000
You know, because they just knew without fail she would say it.
00:44:50.079 --> 00:44:54.719
So I just, yeah, I have to just remember who the fuck I am.
00:44:54.960 --> 00:44:56.719
And I do a lot of journaling.
00:44:56.880 --> 00:45:00.079
Like I do a lot of offline stuff to like touch grass.
00:45:00.400 --> 00:45:03.760
Um, and I've also, it's like trial and error, right?
00:45:03.840 --> 00:45:06.079
Like I used to share way more than I do now.
00:45:06.480 --> 00:45:10.400
And I think internet culture, social media culture has changed so much.
00:45:10.480 --> 00:45:12.880
And it's like we have to save space.
00:45:13.119 --> 00:45:13.840
No, no, no.
00:45:13.920 --> 00:45:14.079
Yeah.
00:45:14.480 --> 00:45:18.400
So I have to, yeah, like there are certain things that like are for me.
00:45:18.559 --> 00:45:18.719
Yeah.
00:45:19.119 --> 00:45:24.960
And I like there's no that is there's no other way to go about that.
00:45:25.119 --> 00:45:26.960
It's just like like my wedding was for me.
00:45:27.440 --> 00:45:27.760
Totally.
00:45:28.159 --> 00:45:29.440
That's for me to see.
00:45:29.519 --> 00:45:30.639
And if you were there, good for you.
00:45:31.039 --> 00:45:35.440
Like I and to each their own, but for me, like I'm sacred.
00:45:35.679 --> 00:45:36.719
I gotta keep things sacred.
00:45:36.800 --> 00:45:38.719
I gotta keep things for myself.
00:45:39.039 --> 00:45:41.199
And yeah, just protecting.
00:45:41.920 --> 00:45:50.320
And I think when you say, like, you know, one mean comment, it takes you down for days, like even literally or figuratively, like I I think that people have to remember that.
00:45:50.400 --> 00:45:54.400
Like public speakers figures who choose to share parts of their life, like are human.
00:45:54.719 --> 00:46:10.320
Yeah, we are human, they're you know, we share what we can, but also like there's a point where the people out there have to remember, like, it's very safe behind your computer to say whatever you want to say, but like you have to remember the other side of the people on the other side of it.
00:46:10.400 --> 00:46:10.480
Yeah.
00:46:10.639 --> 00:46:20.880
So and I've seen so many people, it was kind of like going back to what we were talking about earlier, like when I first got here, like being misunderstood and being okay with being misunderstood.
00:46:20.960 --> 00:46:22.239
Like, you you might not get me.
00:46:22.400 --> 00:46:28.480
You might not get my sense of humor, you might not get the stuff, my style, you might not, you just might not get me, and you might not like me.
00:46:28.960 --> 00:46:32.159
And like just being okay with like, oh, well, that's fine.
00:46:32.400 --> 00:46:32.960
Not for everybody.
00:46:33.119 --> 00:46:34.400
Like, and I'm not for everybody.
00:46:34.559 --> 00:46:37.760
And like accepting that is just something that I work on.
00:46:37.920 --> 00:46:38.079
Yeah.
00:46:38.320 --> 00:46:38.880
Because it helps.
00:46:38.960 --> 00:46:40.480
Because then I'm like, oh, whatever, you don't like me.
00:46:40.559 --> 00:46:41.039
I don't care.
00:46:41.199 --> 00:46:41.440
Yeah.
00:46:41.519 --> 00:46:41.599
Yeah.
00:46:41.760 --> 00:46:42.000
It's fine.
00:46:42.159 --> 00:46:42.800
You can't control it.
00:46:42.960 --> 00:46:44.559
What are you gonna do something if you don't like me too?
00:46:44.639 --> 00:46:44.719
Yeah.
00:46:45.199 --> 00:46:45.440
Okay.
00:46:45.519 --> 00:46:45.599
Yeah.
00:46:45.840 --> 00:46:47.679
I hated that outfit of the sweetie, thank you.
00:46:48.639 --> 00:46:49.199
You know.
00:46:50.079 --> 00:46:52.320
And that like links into the acting part of it too.
00:46:52.400 --> 00:47:02.880
You know, if every single audition we went out for, we took that with we took that personally, you know, like, and not the perspective of it's okay, you didn't like me, or you didn't think I was right for the job.
00:47:02.960 --> 00:47:04.079
That's what's kind of on.
00:47:04.400 --> 00:47:06.400
We would all be spiraling.
00:47:06.480 --> 00:47:06.639
Yeah.
00:47:07.119 --> 00:47:10.000
It would have been freeing is that such a freeing feeling.
00:47:10.320 --> 00:47:12.239
And I'm really just been working on it.
00:47:12.400 --> 00:47:12.639
Yes.
00:47:12.800 --> 00:47:14.880
And just being like, oh, I don't care.
00:47:14.960 --> 00:47:16.400
And also like, you don't even know me.
00:47:17.039 --> 00:47:17.199
Right.
00:47:17.360 --> 00:47:18.480
You know what you just saw.
00:47:18.559 --> 00:47:20.800
You know, like I think Tom Holland's.
00:47:21.119 --> 00:47:22.000
I remember who I am.
00:47:22.159 --> 00:47:22.400
Yeah.
00:47:22.480 --> 00:47:24.960
He was like, if you have a problem with me, call me.
00:47:25.039 --> 00:47:26.400
If you don't have my number, you don't know me well.
00:47:26.800 --> 00:47:27.599
Oh, I love that.
00:47:28.480 --> 00:47:31.119
And I was like, we're taking it Spider-Man, let's go.
00:47:31.840 --> 00:47:32.719
That's exactly right.
00:47:33.039 --> 00:47:33.280
Yes.
00:47:33.519 --> 00:47:34.000
And I like that.
00:47:34.239 --> 00:47:35.119
We're taking that with it.
00:47:35.280 --> 00:47:35.679
We're taking that.
00:47:35.840 --> 00:47:36.400
Good job, Tom.
00:47:36.559 --> 00:47:37.360
That's why he got Z.
00:47:37.920 --> 00:47:38.639
Oh, we love him.
00:47:39.119 --> 00:47:39.360
Love.
00:47:39.599 --> 00:47:40.960
Okay, type A, girly.
00:47:41.199 --> 00:47:43.280
Do you ever feel pressure to do everything?
00:47:43.519 --> 00:47:44.719
I do do everything.
00:47:45.039 --> 00:47:46.880
I mean, yes, we know this.
00:47:47.519 --> 00:47:48.800
And we know this.
00:47:48.880 --> 00:47:49.760
Um, I do.
00:47:50.000 --> 00:47:53.119
And I do every, yeah, it's just out of my control.
00:47:53.760 --> 00:47:54.559
It's controlled.
00:47:54.880 --> 00:47:55.440
It's controlled.
00:47:55.599 --> 00:47:56.639
We have to control it.
00:47:57.440 --> 00:47:58.400
But I have to, yes.
00:47:58.639 --> 00:47:59.840
But we don't want to control it.
00:48:00.079 --> 00:48:00.320
Yes.
00:48:00.480 --> 00:48:07.920
And I have tried to um focus that energy in certain aspects of my life where that is necessary.
00:48:08.079 --> 00:48:08.800
Like my business.
00:48:08.880 --> 00:48:10.480
It's great to be type A, my business.
00:48:10.639 --> 00:48:12.639
In my relationship, maybe not so much.
00:48:13.039 --> 00:48:13.920
Because that's annoying.
00:48:14.239 --> 00:48:15.679
Maybe organizing my pantry.
00:48:15.920 --> 00:48:16.960
Great to be type A.
00:48:17.199 --> 00:48:19.360
Dealing with a friend, maybe not.
00:48:19.519 --> 00:48:19.679
Right.
00:48:20.000 --> 00:48:26.079
Always like they don't need this like rigid set of like rules that I think that they should follow to get to where they need to get to.
00:48:26.320 --> 00:48:31.360
So it's about recognizing when to lean in and when to like.
00:48:31.920 --> 00:48:33.760
I feel like you have a really organized pantry.
00:48:33.920 --> 00:48:34.320
Oh, I do.
00:48:34.960 --> 00:48:36.079
I love an organized pantry.
00:48:36.639 --> 00:48:37.119
Do you have labels?
00:48:37.679 --> 00:48:39.199
You know I do have labeled labels.
00:48:39.519 --> 00:48:40.000
Let's go.
00:48:40.079 --> 00:48:40.480
Let's go.
00:48:41.199 --> 00:48:41.760
Everything.
00:48:41.920 --> 00:48:43.840
Like I love organizing.
00:48:44.079 --> 00:48:44.320
I do.
00:48:45.119 --> 00:48:48.239
I would start an organizing business if I had more time because I love it so much.
00:48:48.400 --> 00:48:49.119
It's so much fun.
00:48:49.360 --> 00:48:51.519
It brings I friends are like, can you come over and organize my?
00:48:51.840 --> 00:48:52.000
I do.
00:48:52.320 --> 00:48:52.639
I love it.
00:48:52.800 --> 00:48:53.440
It's my joy.
00:48:53.599 --> 00:48:55.679
It's there is like true connection happening.
00:48:56.159 --> 00:48:59.119
No, and we're like this is our next one.
00:48:59.199 --> 00:48:59.280
Yes.
00:48:59.440 --> 00:48:59.519
Yeah.
00:49:00.320 --> 00:49:01.199
Organizing homes together.
00:49:01.360 --> 00:49:03.280
I just want to volunteer my pantry when I'm going to be able to do it.
00:49:04.559 --> 00:49:05.039
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:49:05.280 --> 00:49:06.800
I mean, we want to come over.
00:49:07.119 --> 00:49:07.920
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:49:08.239 --> 00:49:11.280
No, I my pants are like color-coded.
00:49:11.519 --> 00:49:12.639
Like they have photos.
00:49:12.800 --> 00:49:13.599
This is unwell.
00:49:13.760 --> 00:49:14.719
I would can I marry you?
00:49:14.880 --> 00:49:15.440
No, literally.
00:49:15.519 --> 00:49:16.639
Like we're already married.
00:49:16.719 --> 00:49:17.679
I know marry her.
00:49:18.800 --> 00:49:19.679
Already married you.
00:49:19.920 --> 00:49:20.639
So it's it would be.
00:49:20.880 --> 00:49:25.440
I have like photos of all my pants because I have so many pants that all kind of look similar.
00:49:25.599 --> 00:49:25.760
Yeah.
00:49:25.920 --> 00:49:29.119
So how do you know which one's like for heels or which one's like the cut?
00:49:29.440 --> 00:49:36.880
So they have the photo of my bottom half wearing them, plus the brand name labeled, plus a sticker so that they go in.
00:49:37.519 --> 00:49:38.960
Oh my God, people are listening to this.
00:49:39.199 --> 00:49:39.920
This is the moment.
00:49:40.159 --> 00:49:42.159
This is the moment when she realizes she shared too much.
00:49:42.400 --> 00:49:42.880
No, no, no.
00:49:42.960 --> 00:49:44.480
She's like, I was so close.
00:49:44.639 --> 00:49:45.519
So we made it.
00:49:45.679 --> 00:49:47.840
This is the moment when you're like misunderstanding.
00:49:48.480 --> 00:49:53.280
I understand this though now because I read something about your gift giving Excel sheet.
00:49:53.519 --> 00:49:54.400
Oh, I love gift giving.
00:49:54.480 --> 00:49:54.880
It's my love.
00:49:55.360 --> 00:49:59.360
You make an Excel sheet, you start like the day after the gift giving stops.
00:49:59.599 --> 00:50:01.119
So like tell me about this gift giving.
00:50:01.280 --> 00:50:02.239
Have you always been a gift giver?
00:50:02.800 --> 00:50:03.519
Is it your love language?
00:50:03.760 --> 00:50:04.480
It is, I think.
00:50:04.639 --> 00:50:06.639
I just like people to feel thought of.
00:50:07.119 --> 00:50:14.960
And I think giving a gift, it really shows effort, especially in a world where like we're busy and it's hard to meet up with your adult friends.
00:50:15.119 --> 00:50:18.079
We have to book these dinners two weeks in advance at five o'clock.
00:50:18.239 --> 00:50:18.719
You know what I mean?
00:50:18.800 --> 00:50:20.880
Like we're all, we've got kids, we've got this, we've got that.
00:50:20.960 --> 00:50:21.760
It's hard.
00:50:22.000 --> 00:50:27.199
So I like to give gifts because I don't always get to give my time.
00:50:27.360 --> 00:50:31.760
And I think sending a text can sometimes just feel empty.
00:50:31.920 --> 00:50:32.079
Yeah.
00:50:32.320 --> 00:50:34.880
And I like to just, I want people to feel thought of.
00:50:34.960 --> 00:50:36.400
I want my friends to feel thought of.
00:50:36.639 --> 00:50:39.519
So I have a birthday Excel sheet.
00:50:39.679 --> 00:50:40.880
I have uh Christmas.
00:50:41.199 --> 00:50:42.320
Like what are the columns in this sheet?
00:50:42.400 --> 00:50:48.159
Because I have Like it's by month, and whose birthday and then whose birthday, and then what we got, and then by year.
00:50:48.239 --> 00:50:49.679
So I don't get someone the same gift.
00:50:49.920 --> 00:50:54.480
And do they have like things like do you just know these people so well that you take notes?
00:50:54.880 --> 00:50:55.920
I take notes throughout the year.
00:50:56.079 --> 00:50:56.239
Okay.
00:50:56.480 --> 00:51:01.760
So like if we went to dinner and you said something like, in my childhood, like I love DDD.
00:51:01.840 --> 00:51:02.639
I'll be like, oh my god.
00:51:02.719 --> 00:51:05.679
And you refer back to that, and then it's forms the gift.
00:51:06.079 --> 00:51:06.480
I love this.
00:51:06.559 --> 00:51:07.199
Okay, I get this.
00:51:07.440 --> 00:51:07.599
Yeah.
00:51:07.679 --> 00:51:07.840
Yeah.
00:51:07.920 --> 00:51:08.320
I hear that.
00:51:08.559 --> 00:51:09.519
Again, my friends are my family.
00:51:09.760 --> 00:51:10.400
I was gonna say no.
00:51:10.639 --> 00:51:11.920
You have very, very lucky friends.
00:51:12.079 --> 00:51:15.119
And so people are really looking forward to their birthdays if they're friends with you.
00:51:15.519 --> 00:51:16.079
I hope so.
00:51:16.400 --> 00:51:20.480
I mean, I know my Christmas rollout is like unmatched.
00:51:20.719 --> 00:51:21.840
It's just so much fun.
00:51:22.000 --> 00:51:26.719
And I get to make my mom's like spicy pretzels, like the recipes she made when we were growing up.
00:51:26.880 --> 00:51:32.480
And now, you know, it's so nice when my friends go, My kids are asking, where's Steph's spicy pretzels?
00:51:32.639 --> 00:51:34.719
And I'm like, oh, like what a gift.
00:51:34.880 --> 00:51:37.280
Like, that's so awesome to like create a tradition.
00:51:37.360 --> 00:51:39.360
Because I feel like, are we doing traditions anymore?
00:51:39.440 --> 00:51:41.199
Like, I feel like traditions are like falling by the wayside.
00:51:41.360 --> 00:51:43.280
They are falling by the wayside, but we try.
00:51:43.599 --> 00:51:44.800
Yeah, and like I love traditions.
00:51:45.280 --> 00:51:45.679
People try.
00:51:45.920 --> 00:51:46.400
Yeah, yeah.
00:51:46.559 --> 00:51:47.440
Um, we must.
00:51:47.679 --> 00:51:48.320
Yes, we must.
00:51:48.559 --> 00:51:49.199
It feels good.
00:51:49.280 --> 00:51:52.079
And so, yeah, I love I love to give a gift.
00:51:52.559 --> 00:51:54.159
There's such an art to gift giving.
00:51:54.320 --> 00:51:54.960
There really is.
00:51:55.119 --> 00:51:55.280
Yeah.
00:51:55.599 --> 00:51:56.719
The thought that goes behind it.
00:51:56.800 --> 00:51:59.119
And some people are just really, really good at it.
00:51:59.360 --> 00:52:00.800
I just like the thought, you know?
00:52:01.119 --> 00:52:05.360
Just even if it's something so small or like a a note, a handwritten note.
00:52:05.679 --> 00:52:06.480
Who doesn't love a gift?
00:52:06.559 --> 00:52:06.719
Yeah.
00:52:07.119 --> 00:52:07.519
So nice.
00:52:07.679 --> 00:52:08.000
Yeah.
00:52:08.159 --> 00:52:09.440
Do you like getting gifts too?
00:52:09.599 --> 00:52:10.880
Or you're like, I don't need anything.
00:52:11.039 --> 00:52:11.440
I don't.
00:52:11.599 --> 00:52:11.840
Yeah.
00:52:12.159 --> 00:52:14.800
I feel like I don't, it's like people who bake for other people.
00:52:15.039 --> 00:52:16.079
And they're like, I don't need to eat it.
00:52:16.159 --> 00:52:17.039
I just want to bake for you.
00:52:17.199 --> 00:52:17.440
Exactly.
00:52:17.679 --> 00:52:18.320
I really do see that.
00:52:18.480 --> 00:52:23.280
Like the people who are gift givers are always sometimes uncomfortable, or not uncomfortable, but just like don't necessarily need it.
00:52:24.159 --> 00:52:24.320
Yeah.
00:52:24.639 --> 00:52:25.599
I don't like stuff.
00:52:25.840 --> 00:52:27.119
So I don't need gifts.
00:52:27.360 --> 00:52:28.000
I don't need gifts.
00:52:28.239 --> 00:52:30.639
And like nine times out of ten, like they go, Yeah.
00:52:30.800 --> 00:52:31.920
It's not gonna be what I want.
00:52:32.159 --> 00:52:33.360
Because I'm so type A.
00:52:33.760 --> 00:52:34.719
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:52:34.960 --> 00:52:38.239
So I yeah, I would much rather just like go on a walk.
00:52:38.480 --> 00:52:38.800
Totally.
00:52:38.880 --> 00:52:39.840
Like I like time.
00:52:40.400 --> 00:52:41.280
Is that your love language?
00:52:41.519 --> 00:52:43.599
I think you like time and gifts.
00:52:43.760 --> 00:52:44.000
Yeah.
00:52:44.079 --> 00:52:47.920
I want like I'll give you gifts and then come be with quality time.
00:52:48.239 --> 00:52:50.639
Yeah, and just sit and like talk to me.
00:52:51.199 --> 00:52:51.760
Like this.
00:52:51.920 --> 00:52:53.360
Like this quality time we're having.
00:52:53.599 --> 00:52:54.559
This is very quality.
00:52:54.800 --> 00:52:57.360
Well, I hope nothing that you shared keeps you up at night because it's really lovely.
00:52:57.599 --> 00:52:59.199
And thank you so much for it.
00:52:59.280 --> 00:52:59.760
This was awesome.
00:52:59.920 --> 00:53:00.639
No, this was amazing.
00:53:01.119 --> 00:53:02.559
Thank you guys for thinking of inviting me.
00:53:02.880 --> 00:53:03.280
Oh my gosh, I'm sorry.
00:53:03.440 --> 00:53:06.639
I'm so grateful to be included in this in this club.
00:53:07.760 --> 00:53:08.880
This is so great.
00:53:08.960 --> 00:53:09.599
Thank you so much.
00:53:09.760 --> 00:53:10.239
Thank you.
00:53:10.480 --> 00:53:11.199
Thank you.