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In this episode of The Motherwhelm, I sit down with Michelle, a psychologist and mum in a blended family of five, to talk about breaking generational cycles, birth trauma, and letting go of the pressure to be the perfect mother.
Michelle shares a complicated journey into motherhood that included pregnancy loss, fertility treatment, the breakdown of her relationship during pregnancy, becoming a single mum, and a difficult first birth. We also talk about finding love again, creating a beautifully connected blended family, her subsequent VBAC, and the significant birth injuries and physical recovery that followed.
Along the way, Michelle reflects on how her own childhood has shaped the mother she wants to be, the relentlessness of parenting, repairing after we lose our patience, body image after babies, and learning that our children don't need perfection - they need connection.
We also talk about how motherhood gave Michelle a sense of purpose she hadn't expected and ultimately led her to combine her work as a psychologist with her passion for pregnancy, birth, and motherhood through perinatal psychology.
Resources mentioned:
- The Great Birth Rebellion
- The Mel Robbins' Podcast
- 'Hold On to Your Kids: Why Parents Need to Matter More Than Peers' by Gordon Neufeld & Gabor Maté
Topics discussed: motherhood expectations, perfectionism, good-enough parenting, social media, perinatal psychology, childhood trauma, family violence, breaking generational cycles, unconditional love, rupture and repair, miscarriage, chemical pregnancy, fertility treatment, IUI, relationship breakdown during pregnancy, infidelity, single motherhood, caesarean birth, postpartum recovery, breastfeeding, blended families, co-parenting, VBAC, maternity care, birth trauma, forceps birth, third-degree tear, postpartum haemorrhage, blood transfusion, special care, prolapse, pelvic-floor recovery, body image, stretch marks, subsequent pregnancy after loss, preparing for another birth, relationships after children, the mental load, maternal identity, self-care, career and motherhood, slowing down and being present.
