Small Healthy Changes Help You Make Big Ones

WEBVTT
00:00:14.560 --> 00:00:14.560
[inaudible].
00:00:14.759 --> 00:00:22.170
Hi, I'm Katya and we're here at the Commonwealth center for holistic herbalism in Boston, Massachusetts and on the internet everywhere.
00:00:22.199 --> 00:00:23.760
Thanks to the power of the podcast
00:00:26.179 --> 00:00:30.859
where we are, uh, in our new place in our new place.
00:00:30.980 --> 00:00:32.240
It was a big change to get here.
00:00:32.450 --> 00:00:32.780
Yeah.
00:00:33.020 --> 00:00:33.619
We like it here.
00:00:34.250 --> 00:00:35.240
We do like it here.
00:00:35.240 --> 00:00:36.289
It's been a good change.
00:00:36.320 --> 00:00:41.530
The transition part was, you know, like it always is, you know, if you pick up all the things, put them down again.
00:00:41.600 --> 00:00:45.859
If you do that about a million times and then you're there and then you're there.
00:00:45.860 --> 00:00:46.189
Yeah.
00:00:47.240 --> 00:00:52.490
The unpacking part of that, which is when you pick everything up a million more times, yeah.
00:00:52.700 --> 00:00:57.530
At least, well, maybe 2 million because you put something down and you're like, no, this isn't really, go there and then you move it again.
00:00:58.429 --> 00:01:03.439
Then you have to, and I still need to rearrange all of the books on the shelves because these, this is just nonsense.
00:01:04.109 --> 00:01:16.019
What I have discovered in this process is that, um, even though I thought I had gotten rid of a lot of things that we didn't need anymore, in fact, I could get rid of a lot more things that we don't need anymore.
00:01:17.489 --> 00:01:18.000
Yeah, yeah.
00:01:18.359 --> 00:01:18.579
Yeah.
00:01:18.989 --> 00:01:20.879
Well, this, we're not just rambling.
00:01:20.909 --> 00:01:23.129
This is actually relevant to today's podcast topic.
00:01:23.670 --> 00:01:24.269
Yes.
00:01:24.629 --> 00:01:37.530
I really, um, because of the move, um, I am thinking a lot about change and how to make change because making change can be really challenging.
00:01:37.560 --> 00:01:45.329
So I, I want to spend some time talking about that and talking about how to be more successful when we're trying to make changes in our lives.
00:01:45.930 --> 00:01:46.230
Yeah.
00:01:47.069 --> 00:01:51.900
But before we get to that, uh, we just want to remind you like always that we're not doctors.
00:01:52.530 --> 00:01:54.750
We're herbalists and we're holistic health educators.
00:01:54.980 --> 00:01:59.030
The ideas discussed on this podcast do not constitute medical advice.
00:01:59.359 --> 00:02:03.230
No state or federal authority licenses, herbalists in the United States.
00:02:03.260 --> 00:02:06.319
So these discussions are for educational purposes only.
00:02:06.950 --> 00:02:08.479
Everybody's body is different.
00:02:08.480 --> 00:02:15.949
So the things that we're talking about may or may not apply directly to you, but we hope that they'll give you some information to think about and some ideas to research further
00:02:16.539 --> 00:02:19.629
and we want to remind you that good health is your own personal responsibility.
00:02:19.689 --> 00:02:27.849
That the final decision when considering any course of therapy, whether it's discussed on the internet or prescribed by your physician, is always yours.
00:02:28.629 --> 00:02:29.199
Yes.
00:02:29.259 --> 00:02:34.180
Even if it's about making change in your life, that's your choice.
00:02:34.870 --> 00:02:35.319
Yeah.
00:02:35.320 --> 00:02:38.620
That's part of the, sometimes we forget, well, yeah, right.
00:02:38.919 --> 00:02:39.969
I have to do this thing.
00:02:39.971 --> 00:02:41.050
I have to change this thing.
00:02:41.050 --> 00:02:42.129
I have to do it differently.
00:02:42.460 --> 00:02:42.849
Yeah.
00:02:43.419 --> 00:02:44.020
Maybe you do.
00:02:45.069 --> 00:02:47.110
Maybe you want to, maybe both.
00:02:48.069 --> 00:02:48.969
You have to when you want to.
00:02:49.780 --> 00:02:50.620
Sometimes that happens.
00:02:51.409 --> 00:03:13.189
Well, when you're, whether you're a clinical herbalist who's working with people or just a person in the world who has, that you talk to regularly, it's really critical that when we offer advice, especially from the perspective of herbalists, um, that, that we take some time to recognize that change is hard.
00:03:13.639 --> 00:03:16.580
And there's actually nothing wrong with that.
00:03:16.819 --> 00:03:18.439
It doesn't have to be easy.
00:03:18.441 --> 00:03:19.250
It's hard.
00:03:19.251 --> 00:03:20.150
It just is.
00:03:20.151 --> 00:03:21.259
And so,
00:03:21.360 --> 00:03:33.360
so I guess the counter, the other, the uh, the problem could be if you were looking at changes and saying, ah, I know this is so good for me, but why is it so hard?
00:03:33.870 --> 00:03:35.610
Those don't make sense next to each other.
00:03:35.699 --> 00:03:36.270
Yeah.
00:03:36.539 --> 00:03:38.610
It'd be easy to do if it's so good for you.
00:03:39.210 --> 00:03:41.879
Oh no, not necessarily.
00:03:41.881 --> 00:03:47.550
And there's a Gillian complex but also super logical reasons why that's true.
00:03:48.659 --> 00:03:55.469
But right now what I really want to focus on is that we don't need to feel bad because we struggle to make change.
00:03:55.860 --> 00:04:02.340
And also we don't need to act like the changes that we suggest to other people are easy, right?
00:04:02.550 --> 00:04:05.430
We can acknowledge at every point that change is hard.
00:04:05.460 --> 00:04:34.139
And when we do that, whether we are acknowledging that for our own selves in kindness and compassion for the changes that we're trying to make or whether we do that, um, in kindness and compassion to people to whom we are making recommendations of change, um, either side of that when we just simply acknowledge that change is universally difficult, we can then provide support to make changes successful.
00:04:34.889 --> 00:04:46.139
So, so yeah, so that's what I want to talk about and the reason that I think this is so important is that it's completely at the heart of all holistic health strategies basically.
00:04:47.160 --> 00:04:57.449
Um, in this system of health, which is not necessarily the only system of health and it's not the only thing you're ever going to, to do in your life to stay healthy.
00:04:57.689 --> 00:05:11.819
But when we have holistic goals, changes in inherent part of those, you know, if you're trying to improve your digestion, then there are going to be some changes that you like.
00:05:11.850 --> 00:05:13.829
There's not the way that we work.
00:05:13.980 --> 00:05:16.410
There's not a pill that will fix it all for you is what I'm trying to say.
00:05:16.470 --> 00:05:19.170
Like there are herbs that will improve the situation.
00:05:19.170 --> 00:05:31.110
There's this, there's that, there's the other thing, but there are also the changes that you make to the habits that you have in the way that you live that are requisite in, in the ultimate end goal that you're trying to achieve.
00:05:31.980 --> 00:05:42.959
And because those changes are always part of how we work holistically, then that means that we need to spend some time thinking about change and how to make it successfully.
00:05:44.139 --> 00:05:49.120
Yeah, I'm over here sort of thinking and then catching myself and then thinking on top of that.
00:05:49.120 --> 00:05:56.949
And you know, sometimes changes seem small and easy, like a, here's a, a tea blend and you're going to drink this every day.
00:05:57.660 --> 00:06:01.290
And then other changes might seem big and large and complicated.
00:06:01.800 --> 00:06:07.920
Like, um, we're going to completely overhaul your diet and you're going to do a whole 30 or you're going to do this for that.
00:06:09.389 --> 00:06:18.360
Uh, but the thing is that I've had people react to each of those in the completely opposite way and feel like one of them was really easy and the other was really hard.
00:06:18.449 --> 00:06:22.500
And sometimes we get surprised by which one turns out to be, which,
00:06:22.589 --> 00:06:33.870
you know, it is funny because there are people who are very happy to do a whole 30 and say, yes, I will change every single thing about the way that I eat, but I just can't manage to make a pot of tea every day.
00:06:33.990 --> 00:06:34.709
Like I can't do it.
00:06:34.711 --> 00:06:35.670
I can't make that happen.
00:06:36.209 --> 00:06:45.899
And so if you're out there thinking that certain changes are the easy ones and other changes are the hard ones, it turns out that that's really personal.
00:06:46.259 --> 00:06:52.139
Like literally for some people, um, they genuinely don't have any trouble giving up sugar.
00:06:52.290 --> 00:07:05.430
It's a small number of people, but there are, but there are definitely people that I've met who, um, who don't really care much about sugar or even don't care much about food at all.
00:07:05.430 --> 00:07:18.060
Like they kind of have a fuel relationship with food, which I think is something that we, like, there's a cultural aspect about food is fuel and sort of like a myth.
00:07:18.689 --> 00:07:24.300
But the, I think the reality for many more people is that there's a huge emotional component to food.
00:07:24.300 --> 00:07:34.410
But there's also a social component to food and a socialization component to food and, and, and that that's our food choices are layered and complicated.
00:07:34.620 --> 00:07:40.350
And so, although for some people, those kinds of changes are super easy.
00:07:41.519 --> 00:07:47.160
For most people changing the way that you eat, there's a lot going on there.
00:07:47.699 --> 00:07:53.910
Um, and so, and all of the factors that are going on there contribute to making that change hard.
00:07:56.670 --> 00:08:08.910
Um, but the bottom line here, like for somebody else, for example, it might be really easy to exercise because maybe they just grew up playing sports every season, playing sports at school in a really sporty family.
00:08:08.911 --> 00:08:15.660
And so that's kind of a baseline that might even be comforting for them to return to if they've come from a sedentary environment.
00:08:16.319 --> 00:08:31.350
Whereas the way I grew up, and I know other people who have grown up this way too, uh, my family valued the sorts of activities that were sedentary, like reading and, and like an explicitly devalued sport.
00:08:31.949 --> 00:08:38.580
So for some people making more time for sport is very fulfilling for them.
00:08:38.639 --> 00:08:50.759
But then for other people maybe who grew up like me making more time for sport is like there's a lot of guilt and shame wrapped up into taking that time because you were raised believing that it wasn't good to do that.
00:08:50.759 --> 00:09:00.929
So, so there's just so many layers of makes things difficult and difficult for some people but easy for other people.
00:09:01.590 --> 00:09:14.070
So, um, so what that means is that just because it's easy for one person doesn't mean that it should be easy for you or that you're bad if it's not easy for you.
00:09:14.159 --> 00:09:14.610
Right?
00:09:14.639 --> 00:09:26.370
It's just that it's just different for every person and that the, like the next thing you need to think about there is first off, like if it's challenging for you, you don't need to feel bad about it.
00:09:26.370 --> 00:09:33.899
But secondly, if you work with people, then you need to really think a lot about the things that are easy for you.
00:09:34.470 --> 00:09:55.080
Because if you work with people and you find one thing particularly easy, you, you have to really examine yourself there because your natural inclination is to expect that it will be easy for all people because it's easy for you that that's like the subconscious thing, right.
00:09:55.110 --> 00:10:00.210
If it's easy for you, it just feels logical that that must be an easy thing.
00:10:01.019 --> 00:10:06.809
And, and so we have to like check ourselves about those expectations.
00:10:07.360 --> 00:10:07.570
Yeah.
00:10:07.571 --> 00:10:18.580
And in both directions too, like if something is difficult for you, you may be inclined to present it a little hesitantly and a little like, well I think this might help you, but boy is it tough.
00:10:18.879 --> 00:10:19.929
Oh, it's so hard.
00:10:20.440 --> 00:10:24.399
I don't know if you'll be able to do it cause it's really hard, but let me tell you, okay, here's the thing.
00:10:24.789 --> 00:10:29.080
And they may not react that way if you hadn't hyped him up about it.
00:10:30.549 --> 00:10:32.679
It's like, Oh boy, this is going to be pretty terrible.
00:10:32.681 --> 00:10:33.519
What's coming next.
00:10:34.480 --> 00:10:39.580
Uh, and you know, you can, you can like jog somebody out of their own space of, of that, you know?
00:10:39.581 --> 00:10:43.419
And if you just present it like, okay, here's this thing, I think this could probably really make a big difference.
00:10:43.421 --> 00:10:44.559
Here's some reasons why.
00:10:44.799 --> 00:10:45.879
What do you think about it?
00:10:46.240 --> 00:10:52.240
Then people have a little more of their own space to decide if they feel like that is hard or it is easy or, or my girls.
00:10:53.080 --> 00:10:53.440
Right?
00:10:53.679 --> 00:10:54.279
Yeah.
00:10:54.610 --> 00:10:57.940
And so you turn up to, you know, you try not to preload that too much.
00:10:58.570 --> 00:10:59.889
Um, because they can always surprise you.
00:11:01.830 --> 00:11:04.440
Also, this can go in the opposite direction, right?
00:11:04.441 --> 00:11:19.350
So like if somebody sees you not struggling with something, um, that they may find challenging, then they are likely to think that they're bad because it's a struggle for them.
00:11:19.919 --> 00:11:50.279
So it, especially if you are a person who is a practicing herbalist, which means that you are a person that people are watching, um, for not just watching, like not just asking your opinion, but they're also watching what you model, the behaviors that you model, um, that sometimes you also have to notice that, um, other people have certain expectations as they watch the behavior that your modeling.
00:11:50.730 --> 00:11:58.639
And that's when I started like that is, is why I made the decision to start talking so freely about how much I love cake.
00:11:59.750 --> 00:12:02.750
Um, because I don't want to go to bed on time.
00:12:02.870 --> 00:12:04.039
Yes, exactly.
00:12:04.041 --> 00:12:04.549
Exactly.
00:12:04.551 --> 00:12:11.000
Because one of the most common things that I used to hear was like, well, the whole gluten free thing is easy for you, but I could never do it.
00:12:11.899 --> 00:12:16.070
And they would say that because they saw me succeeding with it and never, ever cheating.
00:12:16.519 --> 00:12:20.690
And so they implied from that, that it was never challenging for me not to cheat.
00:12:21.230 --> 00:12:28.190
But actually what was going on is that, um, in my body, the consequences for cheating are enormous.
00:12:28.490 --> 00:12:34.429
And it is, it is big enough that I am absolutely unwilling to do it.
00:12:35.240 --> 00:12:43.820
That doesn't mean that I don't wish that I could, um, because let me tell you, I would be at Dunkin donuts every single morning if I could get away with it.
00:12:44.480 --> 00:12:45.200
Uh, but I can't.
00:12:45.649 --> 00:12:53.179
And that's a good thing because if I could get away with it without huge consequences, then I would still be having other consequences, you know?
00:12:53.240 --> 00:12:58.580
And so anyway, my point doesn't mean that it was always easy for you, right?
00:12:58.759 --> 00:12:59.029
Yes.
00:12:59.450 --> 00:13:05.029
Your first day gluten free was as, as uh, there were tears, gentle uncomfortable as this day.
00:13:05.090 --> 00:13:06.139
Yeah, I know.
00:13:06.169 --> 00:13:07.009
Absolutely.
00:13:08.029 --> 00:13:18.889
Um, and so what I discovered is that the more open than I am about my struggles with um, sort of comfort foods that frequently have gluten in them.
00:13:19.820 --> 00:13:23.210
Um, and for me that is sugar is also a big component of that.
00:13:23.929 --> 00:13:49.009
Um, the more open I am about my love of cake and my love of gluten free French toast, um, and the more open that I am about my harm reduction strategies for foods that give me comfort, which is to say the things that I struggle with and the ways that I find to be successful with those struggles, the more that people start to understand that this is not a willpower problem, it is a creativity challenge.
00:13:49.190 --> 00:13:59.840
Like when we're talking about changes, there's basically like, I honestly believe that there's nobody out there who can't make the change that they want to make.
00:14:00.230 --> 00:14:07.129
It is just a matter of finding the creative solution that is going to allow you to be successful in making that change.
00:14:08.240 --> 00:14:13.730
And for me, sometimes that is a really good box of gluten free brownie mix.
00:14:14.120 --> 00:14:17.779
Like whatever, whatever gets you to your goal.
00:14:18.919 --> 00:14:21.289
Um, you know, it could be as simple as that.
00:14:21.529 --> 00:14:29.330
It could be as simple as, um, a supportive tea blend that helps you, uh, not feel your cravings so hard.
00:14:30.320 --> 00:14:31.789
There's so many.
00:14:31.850 --> 00:14:35.720
Well, and I guess that's the next step is to talk about that a little bit.
00:14:36.529 --> 00:14:36.799
Yeah.
00:14:38.539 --> 00:14:48.799
Um, so sort of, I think the first thing maybe that we think about when we think about successfully making change is accountability.
00:14:50.090 --> 00:14:53.429
Um, and accountability is really, really helpful.
00:14:53.431 --> 00:15:02.970
Like getting a buddy to make the change with you so that you have that support and accountability or being really public about the change that you're trying to make so that you have accountability.
00:15:03.570 --> 00:15:10.860
And I feel like that is, that is often the first thing that many people think about is I'm trying to make a change.
00:15:10.860 --> 00:15:12.269
I need to get accountability.
00:15:13.470 --> 00:15:20.250
And I think that that's really interesting because, um, it's kind of punitive in nature.
00:15:20.730 --> 00:15:22.350
Like if you think about it, it's like
00:15:22.610 --> 00:15:28.529
I need someone to keep me in line and smack my knuckles when I keep, uh, yeah.
00:15:30.259 --> 00:15:33.769
Uh, I don't think this is a great comparison, but it came to mind.
00:15:33.770 --> 00:15:34.340
Okay, here we go.
00:15:34.580 --> 00:15:39.259
So there's a Stephen King short story called quitters incorporated.
00:15:40.100 --> 00:15:46.669
Uh, and it's about somebody who like is in an airport and runs into an old friend and he, he's like, wow, you look great.
00:15:46.671 --> 00:15:47.389
You've lost weight.
00:15:47.740 --> 00:15:48.889
You're, you're like glowing.
00:15:48.890 --> 00:15:49.700
What's, what's the deal?
00:15:49.701 --> 00:15:51.200
He's like, Oh, I finally quit smoking.
00:15:51.710 --> 00:15:56.120
And uh, and I, it was with the help of this special organization.
00:15:56.120 --> 00:16:02.029
So here's their card, give them a call and you know, he goes and meets them and they were like, alright, we're going to, we're going to help you out here.
00:16:02.030 --> 00:16:02.990
You're going to quit smoking.
00:16:03.889 --> 00:16:07.549
Um, and, uh, just go ahead and head out there and you should really stop.
00:16:07.551 --> 00:16:08.990
And if you don't, you'll find out why.
00:16:09.590 --> 00:16:10.519
And then he does.
00:16:10.520 --> 00:16:12.080
And then there are consequences.
00:16:12.320 --> 00:16:14.669
And they're horrible because it's Stephen King.
00:16:14.720 --> 00:16:15.980
Yeah.
00:16:16.570 --> 00:16:17.559
Um, yeah.
00:16:17.950 --> 00:16:23.169
So, uh, we'll just leave that one there, but if you've read the story, you know what I'm talking about, right?
00:16:23.559 --> 00:16:29.379
Like the idea here is, uh, people only do the hard thing when they get really forced into it.
00:16:29.470 --> 00:16:31.929
You're like up against the wall and there's consequences.
00:16:32.129 --> 00:16:32.899
Yeah.
00:16:33.379 --> 00:16:33.899
Yeah.
00:16:33.960 --> 00:16:37.710
So I think that accountability buddies are great.
00:16:37.740 --> 00:17:02.070
I think that, um, recognizing that as humans, we w we often do better when we have built some kind of accountability into our plan is great, but I just want to acknowledge that even if it isn't as far as Stephen King like that is coming from a place of like disciplinarian kind of thinking.
00:17:02.129 --> 00:17:08.579
And so I want to think about other ways that change can be successful and that can get the job done sometimes.
00:17:08.609 --> 00:17:08.849
Yeah.
00:17:08.851 --> 00:17:09.119
No.
00:17:09.121 --> 00:17:23.220
And sometimes you do what you gotta do, but, uh, one thing for me especially, um, especially when I'm thinking about things like food is, um, if you go ahead, you say that, okay.
00:17:23.250 --> 00:17:34.680
If you're trying to give up something that you love before you try to give it up, find all of the substitutes for that thing and really choose your favorites.
00:17:34.980 --> 00:17:51.420
So if you're, if you are, if you have Italian heritage and you come from a family where you can't live without pasta because like I've met so many, um, Italian American people who are like, I can't, I could never go gluten free cause I can't give up pasta.
00:17:52.170 --> 00:18:01.049
Well then don't even try to go gluten free until you've tried every gluten free pasta on the market and found the one that tastes really good to you.
00:18:01.440 --> 00:18:08.279
And once you have done that, then go gluten free because you've, you've met the need of like the thing that was standing in your way,
00:18:08.720 --> 00:18:09.049
right?
00:18:09.440 --> 00:18:12.769
And this is something you and your accountability buddy can get into beforehand.
00:18:13.190 --> 00:18:17.390
The best kind of accountability buddy is the one that's doing the same change along with you.
00:18:17.930 --> 00:18:32.089
Not just like, Hey, I need you to check in with me every couple of days and asking me if I, if I want, if I, if I had a soda, if I, if I did my workout today or whatever, but if, but if they're doing it together with you, then you can go through the stages together.
00:18:32.090 --> 00:18:37.130
You can start out by finding your substitutes and testing them before you commit full time.
00:18:38.119 --> 00:18:46.460
Um, you're also, they're more likely to be gentle to each other when you do, you know, and compassionate have trouble or slip up or whatever you want to call it.
00:18:47.690 --> 00:18:48.619
Um, yeah,
00:18:48.900 --> 00:18:53.430
it can be more like a collaboration partner instead of an accountability partner.
00:18:53.970 --> 00:18:54.359
Yeah.
00:18:54.480 --> 00:18:55.140
You can do both.
00:18:55.319 --> 00:18:56.369
Yeah, I like that.
00:18:57.990 --> 00:19:11.789
Um, so, so yeah, especially when we're talking about food, um, I find that finding the substitutes before you remove things does make it a lot easier.
00:19:12.420 --> 00:19:23.789
But sometimes, um, you know, those kinds of strategies are great, but sometimes change itself can be the catalyst for change.
00:19:23.849 --> 00:19:32.670
And I think that that is really the category of things that I wanna focus on today since we have just had a giant change that is catalyzing other changes.
00:19:33.269 --> 00:19:34.500
It's really what's on my mind.
00:19:35.390 --> 00:19:48.500
This is one like one way this is like is a, you know, a pebble, you throw the pebble down the Hill and then that maximum broccolis and that this is into a Boulder and you know, it kind of builds on itself.
00:19:49.430 --> 00:19:50.690
We can all be avalanches together.
00:19:52.480 --> 00:19:54.430
Um, I love that right now.
00:19:54.431 --> 00:19:56.140
Can I, can I have that as a tee shirt?
00:19:56.259 --> 00:19:58.150
Let's be avalanches together.
00:19:58.240 --> 00:20:03.549
I, I just need to stop for a minute and bask in the glow of what you just said.
00:20:05.779 --> 00:20:05.779
Yeah.
00:20:06.009 --> 00:20:06.009
Okay.
00:20:06.039 --> 00:20:19.809
But I mean it's a, it's because change is, is you've already initiated some inertia and uh, maybe the, the big change you have in mind is going to involve lots and lots of momentum being built up and developed.
00:20:19.810 --> 00:20:21.910
But you don't necessarily have to do all of that at once.
00:20:23.269 --> 00:20:27.319
Or in other words, change is a really active state, right?
00:20:27.320 --> 00:20:33.650
If you're at rest, then physics says you are most likely to stay there.
00:20:33.890 --> 00:20:39.049
And if you're in motion, physics says you're most likely to stay there.
00:20:39.279 --> 00:20:43.630
If you go for a walk, you're more likely to climb a tree.
00:20:44.380 --> 00:20:44.740
Right
00:20:45.240 --> 00:20:51.460
then if you sit on your couch, not that there's anything wrong with anybody sitting on a couch, it's hard to reach the trees from the couch.
00:20:52.420 --> 00:20:52.660
Yeah.
00:20:52.690 --> 00:20:53.259
They're way over there.
00:20:53.710 --> 00:21:12.930
So, um, so I really, really, that idea of using any change to initiate changes that you're specifically trying to make or even that you're struggling with, um, is, is really an excellent way to start that start that avalanche.
00:21:12.950 --> 00:21:24.039
I, I, I, I just want to be done now because I just need to go spend the whole rest of the day thinking cause the curler, it's a buddy's at rest tend to stay at rest is bodies in motion tend to stay in motion.
00:21:24.099 --> 00:21:24.460
Right.
00:21:24.670 --> 00:21:25.750
All right, so let's get it going.
00:21:25.750 --> 00:21:26.009
Okay.
00:21:26.010 --> 00:21:26.319
Anyway.
00:21:26.349 --> 00:21:26.769
Yes.
00:21:27.430 --> 00:21:54.910
Um, there's another factor here and that is a culturally, um, we have this idea that we are kind of like we, we especially in this country have been socialized with this idea that we're always sort of moving up the ladder, or at least we're supposed to be, and that making changes can represent some kind of failure or some kind of backwards movement or that making changes implies that we were previously wrong, which also in our culture is something to be avoided at all costs.
00:21:55.690 --> 00:22:00.410
That was like the end of the story, right?
00:22:00.880 --> 00:22:01.420
Right.
00:22:01.720 --> 00:22:14.380
Or that or that if we make a change, then we aren't who people thought we were or maybe we're not who we thought we were like that our identity is wrapped up in the thing that we're struggling to change.
00:22:15.160 --> 00:22:36.849
Basically what I'm saying is that it's not just the inertia of it's hard to climb a tree when you're sitting on a couch, but it is also all the emotion and the identity and the cultural socialization that's wrapped up in our desire to actually not change because that's the direction that society is pointing us in.
00:22:37.329 --> 00:22:39.309
Actually it would be better if you didn't change.
00:22:40.119 --> 00:22:48.069
And that's something like when you think about, well, even when you think about making a dietary change, right?
00:22:48.910 --> 00:23:08.259
Um, you may be very fortunate in your friends and in your family and in your community, but I have so many clients with stories of like, um, this woman went, was trying to be gluten free and dairy free because she was experimenting to see if it was going to help with her migraines that were really awful.
00:23:08.710 --> 00:23:15.519
And her husband took a piece of pizza and flopped it in her face and said, ha ha, you can't eat this.
00:23:15.549 --> 00:23:17.230
Like how cruel.
00:23:17.890 --> 00:23:20.799
And so hopefully that doesn't ever happen to you.
00:23:21.130 --> 00:23:23.859
But the reality is that that's actually our culture.
00:23:24.519 --> 00:23:26.529
Our culture is wait a minute, what are you doing?
00:23:26.530 --> 00:23:27.759
Why are you bucking the system?
00:23:27.760 --> 00:23:28.839
Why are you changing?
00:23:29.470 --> 00:23:39.339
And so I want to acknowledge that as well as just the personal inertia, the actual physics behind bodies in motion to that rest.
00:23:40.960 --> 00:24:06.980
So, um, so this brings me to a conversation we were having yesterday actually, um, or the day before anyway, recently, um, about just recognizing and, and really allowing yourself to recognize as often as possible that you are allowed to change and in fact you are allowed to be radically different than what you are right now.
00:24:07.490 --> 00:24:11.420
You're allowed to be radically different than what you were last year.
00:24:12.230 --> 00:24:17.329
You're allowed to think about things that are radically different than anything you've ever done.
00:24:17.690 --> 00:24:24.049
And the example I'm gonna use is that a couple of days ago, Rin was talking about wanting to go hang gliding.
00:24:25.039 --> 00:24:25.279
Yes.
00:24:25.280 --> 00:24:30.470
It's been on my mind lately really hasn't it?
00:24:30.789 --> 00:24:35.180
When we were at dinner with a friend and he's already done this to me, he's like, should we go hang gliding?
00:24:35.181 --> 00:24:36.200
Do you want to go hang gliding?
00:24:36.201 --> 00:24:37.339
Have you ever been hang gliding?
00:24:37.340 --> 00:24:37.509
What?
00:24:37.510 --> 00:24:38.599
What'd you think about hang gliding?
00:24:38.930 --> 00:24:43.339
So I didn't to her with a friend and he was like, what do you think about hang gliding?
00:24:43.340 --> 00:24:44.720
Have you ever been hang gliding?
00:24:45.440 --> 00:24:46.519
And I'm like, okay, here we go.
00:24:48.170 --> 00:24:50.960
I was very surprised that the friend had actually been skydiving.
00:24:50.961 --> 00:24:52.609
I had, I had not known that about her.
00:24:53.990 --> 00:25:00.529
But anyway, as the whole conversation unfolded at one point it just sort of hit me in the head.
00:25:00.980 --> 00:25:07.069
And so I said it out loud because I just kind of how I function like thought in and then like immediately out of mouth.
00:25:07.849 --> 00:25:22.880
But I was like, you know, it is so awesome that if you really wanted to we could sell everything and we could move to a place where you could hang glide every day and get really good at it and be the kind of person who owns their own hang glider and has all the equipment and whatever because you were just that good.
00:25:23.269 --> 00:25:25.759
You could become a teacher of hang gliding if you wanted to.
00:25:25.760 --> 00:25:27.289
And we could, we could do that.
00:25:27.290 --> 00:25:32.119
We could do it today and it might take a minute and we'll, okay, it would take a minute.
00:25:32.121 --> 00:25:38.390
There would be, there would be some things like where does one even go hang gliding and how do you get there?
00:25:39.109 --> 00:25:39.529
Yeah.
00:25:39.530 --> 00:25:54.079
Like, I don't know any of those things, but, but conceptually it was really amazing to just recognize that if that was something that seemed so important that we should uproot everything and do it.
00:25:54.740 --> 00:26:01.130
We can, we actually can not just from a like, Oh it's fine cause we have enough money to do that.
00:26:01.131 --> 00:26:02.359
No, I'm pretty sure we don't.
00:26:03.799 --> 00:26:16.670
But like, but like we have the w w we can, we can figure out what the steps are and then we can say, okay, how much do we need to save up and where would we need to go and how do you even learn to do that thing?
00:26:16.671 --> 00:26:23.480
Like we could figure out all those steps and then we could just start moving in that direction if we want to.
00:26:23.839 --> 00:26:32.869
And um, I'm pretty excited that he did not say, great, let's start tomorrow because I don't actually really want to do that, but, but next year.
00:26:35.400 --> 00:26:46.230
But the thing is that whole center for holistic hang gliding, um, and then we could scout out the plants from whatever many feet.
00:26:46.710 --> 00:26:47.099
Yeah.
00:26:47.101 --> 00:26:48.480
It's a whole new way to identify trees.
00:26:50.130 --> 00:27:12.000
So the, so the thing about this is not that I want you to be like, let's go hang gliding, but I think it's important to, as often as possible, really allow yourself a few minutes of indulging the imagination of what you could do, even if it would be super hard.
00:27:12.000 --> 00:27:17.730
And even if there's lots of barriers between here and there, what you could do.
00:27:18.309 --> 00:27:18.490
Yeah.
00:27:18.490 --> 00:27:28.569
It's super easy to get into this place of like all of the things that I do and have an am and and eaten, whatever, like those are, those are, that's what it has to be.
00:27:28.660 --> 00:27:30.549
That's what I, that's how I am.
00:27:30.550 --> 00:27:31.150
That's what I do.
00:27:31.660 --> 00:27:32.200
That's the end of it.
00:27:32.950 --> 00:27:32.950
Yeah.
00:27:32.980 --> 00:27:33.819
And to get stuck there,
00:27:34.940 --> 00:27:45.589
people say like, um, I'm really on about the, the phrase I have to, we use it, we overuse it in our language and in our culture.
00:27:45.920 --> 00:27:48.349
So there'll be like, I have to go to the store on the way home from work.
00:27:48.589 --> 00:27:51.079
I have to do this, I have to do that.
00:27:51.650 --> 00:28:06.710
And I always like to think like, do you really have to, like, you don't actually have to, you may need to, you may want to, you may be out of toilet paper, but, um, you could just not use toilet paper today.
00:28:06.740 --> 00:28:09.170
Like it would be unpleasant, but that would be fine.
00:28:09.230 --> 00:28:11.269
And so, right.
00:28:11.299 --> 00:28:20.990
And so I, I like to think about like, well, and I guess this is just cause I lived in Russia and university, like if I were in Siberian prison camp, would I still have to do that?
00:28:21.049 --> 00:28:27.559
Like I wouldn't in fact not have to stop and buy two faced because I, that would not be an option that I even could do.
00:28:27.559 --> 00:28:39.710
So kind of kind of, I mean, that's sort of a ridiculous thing, but, um, well I have to have dessert every night before I go to bed because I just don't feel fulfilled without it.
00:28:39.740 --> 00:28:43.250
Well, if you were in Siberian prison camp, you would not get dessert before you went to bed at night.
00:28:43.250 --> 00:28:48.230
So maybe you can not do, maybe you don't have to.
00:28:49.009 --> 00:29:08.420
And, and I like to use that as an exercise to remind myself that the things that I am reinforcing on a daily basis, because I use that form of speech, actually I try not to, but sometimes it happens that I don't in fact necessarily have to do all the things that I think I have to do.
00:29:08.690 --> 00:29:12.740
I have to pay my taxes because otherwise, you know, that's not legal.
00:29:13.579 --> 00:29:18.829
There's some things I do have to do, but it is a much smaller number of things than I think.
00:29:19.849 --> 00:29:23.930
And I like to do that exercise on the flip side as well.
00:29:23.931 --> 00:29:36.380
Like, Oh well I could never, okay, well could you never, like what do you mean you couldn't never, like you couldn't ever, like is there really no way that you could do that?
00:29:36.381 --> 00:29:53.019
And then to do that exercise and think about, well, could I like maybe there is a way that I could, when I used to be a software engineer a million years ago, uh, and I was leaving that that career to become a full time herbalist.
00:29:54.130 --> 00:30:00.309
Um, I had given them like more notice than you normally give when you leave a job.
00:30:01.569 --> 00:30:20.799
Um, and it was like everybody in the company found time before I left to like pull me aside in the cafeteria or in the break room or in the like this or that or whatever to to say, I think what you're doing is so amazing.
00:30:20.799 --> 00:30:24.519
And I always wanted to be a math teacher and I would be like, what?
00:30:25.150 --> 00:30:26.140
Why aren't you a math teacher?
00:30:26.141 --> 00:30:28.269
You're an engineer, you're really good at math.
00:30:28.299 --> 00:30:29.470
Like go be a math teacher.
00:30:29.471 --> 00:30:30.579
What's stopping you?
00:30:31.089 --> 00:30:33.849
Or I think what you're doing is really great.
00:30:33.851 --> 00:30:37.960
And I always wanted to sail around the world and I'm like, well then why aren't you sailing around the world?
00:30:37.961 --> 00:30:40.630
Just sell everything and sail around the world.
00:30:40.631 --> 00:30:44.680
Like you're a software engineer and there's some boats there.
00:30:44.681 --> 00:30:45.220
Yeah.
00:30:45.221 --> 00:30:53.019
Like I, I mean, not everybody can just sell everything and sail around the world, but this person could, like, they, they had the privilege to in fact do that.
00:30:53.020 --> 00:30:55.180
And I was like, well then do it.
00:30:55.210 --> 00:30:56.289
Like why aren't you doing it?
00:30:56.290 --> 00:31:00.519
What is literally stopping you from doing it?
00:31:00.520 --> 00:31:02.769
And I like to ask my clients that too.
00:31:03.279 --> 00:31:03.640
You know, like
00:31:04.599 --> 00:31:06.279
you eat to take the question seriously.
00:31:06.309 --> 00:31:08.799
Okay wait, not just like, well what's stopping you?
00:31:09.170 --> 00:31:13.390
Ha, okay, what, what are the impediments?
00:31:13.391 --> 00:31:14.259
What are the blocks?
00:31:14.319 --> 00:31:21.609
And you know, sometimes it would you, if you stop for a moment and poke at something, you realize, Oh, this was made of paper machine the whole time.
00:31:21.880 --> 00:31:21.880
What
00:31:24.569 --> 00:31:26.250
I see that because I have a mortgage to pay.
00:31:27.000 --> 00:31:29.910
Well, okay, do you really want that house?
00:31:30.000 --> 00:31:30.930
Could you sell it?
00:31:30.960 --> 00:31:33.420
Could you sell it and buy a boat instead?
00:31:33.900 --> 00:31:36.269
And maybe that answer is no.
00:31:36.539 --> 00:31:39.539
Maybe there are reasons why that isn't possible.
00:31:40.049 --> 00:31:46.140
But that doesn't mean that you can't think through and, and question whether it might be possible.
00:31:46.141 --> 00:31:50.369
And you just think it isn't because you think it isn't, you know.
00:31:50.640 --> 00:31:51.900
Well because I have a car payment.
00:31:51.930 --> 00:31:53.400
Well, do you actually need a car?
00:31:53.579 --> 00:31:56.670
Maybe you do, but it's worth asking the question.
00:31:57.359 --> 00:31:59.970
Can you imagine what life would be like without a car?
00:32:01.079 --> 00:32:15.450
Maybe when you, when you go through that exercise, you discover, Hey, I actually could be without a car or I could sell this expensive car with the big payments and I could get a cheap car that just gets me where I need to go.
00:32:15.509 --> 00:32:20.279
Like, I don't know, there's a million things and it's going to be super different for every person.
00:32:21.329 --> 00:32:27.569
But if you really sit down and think literally what are the things that are stopping you?
00:32:27.930 --> 00:32:35.460
And then you just go through the exercise of, um, what could I not do that?
00:32:35.490 --> 00:32:36.779
Could I change that?
00:32:37.650 --> 00:32:51.980
Um, it really, it's just the exercise of examining further the things that we think are preventing us from doing what we want to do or from doing what would allow us to live a healthier life or whatever.
00:32:52.609 --> 00:32:53.960
Just to, just to think about it.
00:32:53.961 --> 00:32:56.150
And in the end, there may be reasons.
00:32:56.151 --> 00:33:02.359
There may be like, no, I can't sell this house because I'm caring for my elderly parent and they need to live here too and they this and that or whatever.
00:33:02.361 --> 00:33:06.589
And like, okay, that's fine, but that's the like most extreme things.
00:33:06.590 --> 00:33:07.910
So what's the next lesson?
00:33:08.390 --> 00:33:10.460
The next less extreme thing from that.
00:33:10.461 --> 00:33:11.420
And can we change that?
00:33:11.421 --> 00:33:13.099
And it's an exercise
00:33:13.180 --> 00:33:26.019
you go through that you might be, might find those realizations of like, okay, so maybe that that grand plan is off the table right now, but in the future it's going to be more accessible or this other piece of it, you know, I could, I could do that.
00:33:26.289 --> 00:33:31.119
It doesn't have to do the complete upheaval is not the only way that it can go down.
00:33:31.329 --> 00:33:33.359
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:33:33.759 --> 00:33:36.009
So yeah, so you, you are allowed to change.
00:33:36.369 --> 00:33:39.220
It may be more possible than it seems at first glance.
00:33:40.539 --> 00:33:44.140
I'm really looking at it carefully is going to be necessary to tell.
00:33:44.509 --> 00:33:44.960
Okay.
00:33:46.339 --> 00:34:04.490
And then once you figure out what changes you could make, like that's still going to be a challenge and maybe maybe the changes you're trying to make don't involve moving across country or moving, uh, like selling your house and buying a sailboat or whether like, you know, those are, those are kind of ridiculous.
00:34:04.640 --> 00:34:15.679
They're, they're not ridiculous at all, but they're not like on the scale of it, they're so much different than what I'm kind of getting at in everyday changes in life.
00:34:16.610 --> 00:34:22.880
Um, and I'm thinking more about maybe you're trying to change how, how you eat, right?
00:34:22.940 --> 00:34:30.260
And that's hard because you have a routine and you go to the grocery store and you always go to the same grocery store cause that's the one that's on the way home from work.
00:34:30.260 --> 00:34:37.550
And you buy the same stuff every time because you're kind of on autopilot and you always go through the store in the same direction and you get the same things.
00:34:37.550 --> 00:34:40.010
And by the way, everyone does this, it's not just you.
00:34:40.969 --> 00:34:46.579
So if you're saying, okay, well how do I change what I eat?
00:34:47.599 --> 00:34:59.329
There are lots of factors that could be blocking you, but one thing, one place where you can use change to start to build momentum for change is to change your grocery store.
00:34:59.869 --> 00:35:12.260
Like go to a different grocery store and or if your town only has one grocery store, then just go through the grocery store in the completely different order than you would normally go.
00:35:12.260 --> 00:35:18.679
And in fact go through the grocery store in a different order every single time you go in, like always start in a different aisle just randomly.
00:35:19.190 --> 00:35:24.230
And because you are, you are in an aisle that you don't expect to be in.
00:35:24.231 --> 00:35:26.750
You are completing the task out of order.
00:35:27.050 --> 00:35:35.690
It kind of like shakes you out of your autopilot routine and causes you to start thinking about, wait, hold on.
00:35:35.690 --> 00:35:41.849
I didn't expect to be in the pasta aisle quite so fast and now I need to think about what, what do I get?
00:35:41.880 --> 00:35:44.849
Like, Oh, I'm walking down the pasta aisle backwards.
00:35:44.851 --> 00:35:55.920
So the things that are normally on the right are now on the left, which means I have to look for what I'm looking for, which reminds me that I wanted to try the gluten free pasta instead of the same old pasta that I always buy.
00:35:56.250 --> 00:35:56.940
Whatever.
00:35:57.510 --> 00:35:58.559
It's simple.
00:35:59.480 --> 00:36:03.570
It's, it's small, but it's a change in perspective.
00:36:03.789 --> 00:36:03.900
It's it.
00:36:03.900 --> 00:36:05.250
Yeah, exactly.
00:36:06.360 --> 00:36:14.250
And it's a change that can help you to keep those other changes that you're trying to make right at the front of your mind.
00:36:14.280 --> 00:36:14.730
Right.
00:36:16.679 --> 00:36:18.750
Um, here's another one with regard to food.
00:36:19.469 --> 00:36:26.639
Uh, one of our students right now is ramping up her plans to try a gluten free diet and she's about to move to a different part of town.
00:36:27.389 --> 00:36:35.250
And so we were talking about that and we were like, boy, wouldn't that be the perfect time to really launch going gluten free?
00:36:35.251 --> 00:36:37.019
Like you've been preparing for a while.
00:36:37.679 --> 00:36:42.360
Uh, you've been finding the kind of pasta that's gluten free and that you like and you've been doing this and doing that.
00:36:42.840 --> 00:36:44.969
The move would be the perfect time to do it.
00:36:45.210 --> 00:36:51.960
And you might be thinking, Oh no, that would be the least convenient time because moving is so hard and you just want to get a pizza because they're so busy.
00:36:52.380 --> 00:37:02.789
But here's the thing, right when you move and you've moved to a new place that you, your favorite cafe isn't there and your favorite pizza delivery guys isn't there.
00:37:02.791 --> 00:37:08.940
And all the places that you would normally get take out, they're not there and you don't know the new places yet.
00:37:09.750 --> 00:37:21.360
That's a great time to go ahead and make a change because if you are suddenly in a new place and you don't even know if there's any takeout available, what are you going to do?
00:37:21.360 --> 00:37:25.349
Well I guess I should just cook something, then there isn't any other option.
00:37:26.489 --> 00:37:39.030
Um, so, so not having her very favorite cafe or her very favorite pizza place right there on the way home from work, just like taunting her into that pizza.
00:37:39.659 --> 00:37:41.699
It's like having a totally clean slate.
00:37:41.701 --> 00:37:46.710
So she's able to say, well, I don't know where anything is yet anyway.
00:37:46.710 --> 00:37:49.800
And I don't know, even if I was to pass one, I don't know if it's any good.
00:37:49.800 --> 00:37:52.409
So this is the perfect time.
00:37:54.300 --> 00:37:54.750
Yeah.
00:37:55.679 --> 00:37:58.260
So I dunno, maybe you're trying to change how you sleep, right?
00:37:59.250 --> 00:38:00.420
Um, cause not everything's about food,
00:38:01.159 --> 00:38:01.519
right?
00:38:02.510 --> 00:38:02.510
Yeah.
00:38:03.269 --> 00:38:04.559
So yeah, you want to change how you sleep.
00:38:04.590 --> 00:38:12.570
You make, you want to get more sleep, you want to get more restful sleep, you want to start having your sleep hygiene routines and the hour before bed, all that good stuff.
00:38:13.320 --> 00:38:16.469
Um, and maybe you've tried a couple times and it's a hit and run.
00:38:16.550 --> 00:38:17.349
It didn't happen.
00:38:17.489 --> 00:38:17.739
Okay.
00:38:18.809 --> 00:38:23.579
So what else can we do that's relevant to sleep that might start to build some momentum there?
00:38:23.880 --> 00:38:25.889
Maybe we can change up the bed a little bit.
00:38:25.920 --> 00:38:27.449
Maybe we can get some new sheets on there.
00:38:27.451 --> 00:38:31.349
Maybe we can get a new pillow and now it's like, Oh this is really comfy.
00:38:31.599 --> 00:38:32.820
Love my pillow.
00:38:32.969 --> 00:38:34.110
You want to lie down in there?
00:38:34.110 --> 00:38:35.409
That's going to be pretty great.
00:38:36.280 --> 00:38:36.280
Um,
00:38:36.699 --> 00:38:43.599
you know, if you can like conjure for yourself the feeling you have in the morning every day of being like, Oh, it's so nice in here.
00:38:45.650 --> 00:38:48.039
I think, I think I'll just hit snooze again.
00:38:48.130 --> 00:38:50.289
You know, why not, uh, yeah.
00:38:50.440 --> 00:38:54.789
Any way to like remind yourself and entice yourself a little bit in the nighttime.
00:38:55.510 --> 00:38:56.079
Maybe that could help.
00:38:56.170 --> 00:38:56.469
Yeah.
00:38:56.949 --> 00:38:58.539
What if you sleep on the other side of the bed?
00:38:58.869 --> 00:39:00.699
What if you move the bed across the room?
00:39:01.059 --> 00:39:06.280
What if you get rid of the bed entirely and sleep on a pile of blankets and she, BES, I think that's a great idea.
00:39:06.349 --> 00:39:07.929
It turns out it's pretty[inaudible]
00:39:07.940 --> 00:39:10.219
10 out of 10 would recommend.
00:39:12.409 --> 00:39:22.730
What if you, um, what if you change up some part of your evening routine and have it be as simple as changing the lights that you use in the house after a certain time?
00:39:22.960 --> 00:39:23.320
Yeah.
00:39:24.190 --> 00:39:24.489
Yeah.
00:39:25.059 --> 00:39:39.429
So a little things, but the idea is that the small simple things that don't require a deep reservoir of willpower, uh, they help to build the momentum toward the one that, that feels harder at first glance.
00:39:40.809 --> 00:39:41.110
Yeah.
00:39:41.460 --> 00:39:42.719
For me right now.
00:39:43.500 --> 00:39:51.599
Uh, I've been, I and I, and this is wrapped up in our whole move to like, I've been struggling with that thing.
00:39:51.601 --> 00:39:54.900
They call work life balance for a really long time.
00:39:55.739 --> 00:39:57.989
Um, partially because I love what we do.
00:39:58.139 --> 00:40:04.829
I've, I literally love making classes for people to learn.
00:40:05.429 --> 00:40:05.429
Herbalism.
00:40:05.431 --> 00:40:10.500
I love having ideas about like, Ooh, I bet they would love this video.
00:40:10.501 --> 00:40:16.500
And I don't necessarily maybe love every single part of the process.
00:40:16.530 --> 00:40:26.519
Like fighting with the computer is sometimes a pain in the butt, but, but I love, I love what we do and I'm super motivated to do it.
00:40:27.360 --> 00:40:39.599
And I grew up in a house that values productivity and D values, leisure time, um, which means that that is my sort of programming as I moved out into the world.
00:40:39.869 --> 00:40:42.059
And that's something to really think about.
00:40:43.500 --> 00:40:56.309
Um, and so I also like, I also recognize that even though I love my work, uh, my body needs to move more than I make time for it to move.
00:40:56.880 --> 00:41:02.550
And frankly, I need to make more time for music and art than I do in my life.
00:41:02.610 --> 00:41:08.579
And all these things are really important and there are things I've been like really struggling with for a long time.
00:41:09.960 --> 00:41:25.800
And so in thinking about moving, we really thought a lot about how we could, um, use this move intentionally to help us to restructure a bunch of stuff in our lives.
00:41:26.250 --> 00:41:38.090
And that was a big part of the decision to move at all was to intentionally restructure things, um, on many levels to help us with things that we've been struggling with.
00:41:38.480 --> 00:42:09.050
So, um, so now for example, a simple thing is that we, um, in our office space, inside our house, in our apartment, we have a space where we can film while it's almost ready, it's not quite unpacked yet, but it's almost there where we can film so that we don't have to get on the train and commute for 45 minutes to get to the place where we film our online classes and then at our, at our school and then commute back 45 minutes.
00:42:09.050 --> 00:42:13.130
Except it's rush hour and the train is slow and now it's an hour and 15 and whatever.
00:42:13.550 --> 00:42:28.550
And so now that I don't have to spend that time, that way I can say, okay, now that time instead of just standing on the train and going back and forth, that time is for moving my body and that time was already baked into my schedule.
00:42:29.420 --> 00:42:34.099
So now I've freed that time up to be able to use it in a different way.
00:42:35.360 --> 00:43:04.010
Um, and so, so using the changes that we wanted to make to fuel moving and using the move to fuel the changes that we wanted to make, like letting that be super, um, reciprocal, uh, is really helping, uh, to, to allow us to like kind of get to that, get past some blocks that we had.
00:43:04.010 --> 00:43:11.690
And I want to be really clear that just because we're herbalists and we're making a podcast does not mean that we don't have blocks in our own health goals as well.
00:43:12.949 --> 00:43:15.199
Like we definitely do.
00:43:15.469 --> 00:43:25.369
But every single day except one when it was really pouring, since we moved, I have been outside moving my body and I'm pretty excited about that.
00:43:26.179 --> 00:43:27.079
He's excited about it too.
00:43:27.500 --> 00:43:28.610
Yeah, she likes it.
00:43:28.969 --> 00:43:29.179
Yeah.
00:43:29.329 --> 00:43:29.659
Yeah.
00:43:29.690 --> 00:43:37.760
There's a cemetery across the street from where we live and it's awesome to go walking in and um, yeah, it's really great.
00:43:38.269 --> 00:43:39.199
I feel really happy.
00:43:42.530 --> 00:43:43.460
Well, okay.
00:43:43.969 --> 00:43:48.769
Um, so, you know, there are some herbs that can actually help around this kind of transition.
00:43:49.730 --> 00:43:56.659
And you know, since we're a nervous, uh, herbalism school, we always want to connect some things back to the plants.
00:43:57.650 --> 00:44:06.949
Um, you know, we often have these, these episodes that are about a way of thinking or about a, about a strategy of approach or something like that.
00:44:07.489 --> 00:44:11.780
And, um, I wonder occasionally like as somebody out there being, like what happened?
00:44:12.050 --> 00:44:13.369
I thought this was an herbalism podcast.
00:44:13.820 --> 00:44:16.610
So if you're brand new and you made it this far, good job.
00:44:17.849 --> 00:44:18.119
Yeah.
00:44:18.150 --> 00:44:20.070
And don't worry, it is an herbalism podcast.
00:44:20.730 --> 00:44:20.730
Yeah.
00:44:21.360 --> 00:44:34.469
Um, and the first herbs I want to bring right up are Hawthorne and Linden because you know, when you make changes that's exciting and there changes that you want to make.
00:44:34.471 --> 00:44:39.239
But also there may be an aspect of grief to that.
00:44:39.690 --> 00:44:55.050
Like, for example, maybe you have successfully gotten rid of dairy in your life and that's really helping you to feel better in your guts and you're not so constipated anymore and whatever, but maybe you really more than cheese, that's okay.
00:44:55.079 --> 00:45:00.119
Like it's all right to be sad about how much you loved cheese and that you're not having it anymore.
00:45:01.170 --> 00:45:04.829
Um, and or maybe you're making a big change.
00:45:04.860 --> 00:45:13.170
Maybe you gave up smoking and your social circle does not support that you're not a smoker anymore, or you gave up.
00:45:13.889 --> 00:45:23.789
Um, you know, everybody goes out and, and goes drinking after work and finally you were like, you know, that's not serving me to, to do that.
00:45:23.789 --> 00:45:24.780
And so you stopped.
00:45:24.780 --> 00:45:29.880
But now like your friend circle is gone and that's fine.
00:45:29.880 --> 00:45:32.909
You're going to, I mean, that's, it's not really fine, but it's fine.
00:45:33.119 --> 00:45:38.159
You're going to get new friends and that's all fine, but, but it's okay to mourn a little bit.
00:45:38.400 --> 00:45:47.099
The things that you lose when you make a change and it's okay, like it's not going to jeopardize your change.
00:45:47.309 --> 00:45:55.829
It isn't going to say like, just because you say, boy, I'm really sad about cheese, boy I really miss cheese.
00:45:56.489 --> 00:45:59.519
That doesn't mean that you're immediately going to fall off the wagon.
00:45:59.670 --> 00:46:07.380
You're allowed to miss cheese and Hawthorne and Lindon help with that kind of grief feeling.
00:46:07.380 --> 00:46:13.170
They help with that, with that sadness of the way things used to be.
00:46:13.230 --> 00:46:22.769
Even if you're excited about the changes you're making and even if you are seeing tons of success, you are allowed to feel a little bit of sadness too.
00:46:23.760 --> 00:46:23.760
Yeah.
00:46:24.360 --> 00:46:24.599
Yeah.
00:46:24.601 --> 00:46:30.119
So herbs like Hawthorne, Lyndon, they help to soften, relax, protect the heart.
00:46:30.809 --> 00:46:37.920
Um, make it feel like you have a little more space to experience those feelings and to move through them with a little more ease.
00:46:38.519 --> 00:46:38.940
Yeah.
00:46:39.000 --> 00:46:40.170
So that can be really important.
00:46:40.980 --> 00:46:48.150
Um, cause it's like you say, there is that element of, of grief or you know, acceptance that you, that you need to work your way through.
00:46:49.380 --> 00:46:51.210
Um, when you're making a change like that.
00:46:51.989 --> 00:47:10.949
Uh, I would say that this is also a place for plants like Tulsi and Schisandra because change change in the and the resistance that we feel to it, um, that has elements of craving to it, especially when you're like, ah, this thing, I enjoy it.
00:47:11.400 --> 00:47:13.440
It's advice, it's a guilty pleasure.
00:47:13.440 --> 00:47:22.250
I said this about, I know it's not good for me and I really, it's okay, it's time to stop, cut down to whatever, whatever the appropriate
00:47:22.590 --> 00:47:25.800
kind of a judgment free way, like have a glass of wine.
00:47:25.800 --> 00:47:43.409
I'm not saying that's bad, but like if maybe gotten to a place where work is really crappy and you deal with it by coming home and having a whole bottle of wine and you do that every night and then you make the decision that actually that doesn't feel good in your body and you want to change that.
00:47:43.440 --> 00:47:47.039
Like anyway, we're not saying that all vices need to be thrown right out the window.
00:47:47.710 --> 00:47:48.280
Yeah.
00:47:48.340 --> 00:47:48.730
Yeah.
00:47:48.969 --> 00:47:53.980
So, so anyway, this resistance we feel to change, it has these elements of craving to it.
00:47:54.880 --> 00:47:56.860
Uh, and there, there's an art for that.
00:47:57.340 --> 00:47:58.269
There's a couple, actually.
00:47:58.271 --> 00:48:02.800
So, you know, Tulsi is probably the more general of these.
00:48:03.550 --> 00:48:05.530
Um, Tulsi is an herb that we think of.
00:48:05.920 --> 00:48:15.099
Uh, almost whenever there are cravings, um, that are, that are making it hard to, to change or to, to step away from something that's not so good for you.
00:48:16.210 --> 00:48:39.400
Um, we find Tulsi to be helpful when there's, uh, cravings for sugar, uh, especially, but you know, we've had people who have been trying to cut down on cannabis use or cut down on, um, on nicotine or alcohol or whatever else it is, um, TV, you know, uh, so Tulsi can be very helpful.
00:48:39.969 --> 00:48:41.349
Um, it's a very gentle herbs.
00:48:41.380 --> 00:48:44.590
It's a very safe herbs in almost all cases.
00:48:44.860 --> 00:48:49.869
So, you know, it's one that we turned to really, really frequently for this kind of support.
00:48:51.760 --> 00:49:01.869
Um, Schisandra is one that we, we have most frequently associated with sugar cravings, um, and it's, it's really well suited to that.
00:49:01.871 --> 00:49:07.210
It has some specific effects in the body to improve sugar regulation and sugar utilization.
00:49:08.019 --> 00:49:11.860
Um, so that there's less of like a physiological drive to, to give you that craving.
00:49:12.400 --> 00:49:18.489
But I think Schisandra can help in a more general sense too, because we know that it is a liver supportive herb.
00:49:18.490 --> 00:49:19.809
It's a hepatoprotective.
00:49:20.769 --> 00:49:28.630
Um, so it's gonna, it's gonna really kind of cool, uh, irritation and heat and fire that's happening in the liver itself.
00:49:29.679 --> 00:49:32.889
Um, and when that's present, there can be frustration.
00:49:32.900 --> 00:49:47.980
There can be a kind of tight trapped sort of, uh, sort of an anger or a heat, um, and cooling that off, getting some space there, um, that can actually help you to take a deeper breath physically and metaphorically SU.
00:49:49.119 --> 00:49:58.480
Um, so yeah, so I think Schisandra is one too to consider if you are struggling with a change that you know is good for you, that you know is necessary.
00:49:59.289 --> 00:50:01.659
Um, but there's that, that voice in there that's liquid.
00:50:01.661 --> 00:50:03.280
I really want it.
00:50:03.619 --> 00:50:04.059
Want it.
00:50:04.829 --> 00:50:05.650
Yes.
00:50:06.309 --> 00:50:11.019
You know, that makes me think of both, both elder flower and also Mobilia.
00:50:12.130 --> 00:50:21.789
Um, in terms of, a lot of times when you are trying to let go of something, uh, the response is to hold onto it tighter.
00:50:22.239 --> 00:50:30.739
You know, like sometimes like even just if you think about your own wardrobe and you're like, Oh, I never wear this shirt, I should give it away.
00:50:31.309 --> 00:50:34.969
And then, and then what's the very next thought that pops into your mind?
00:50:35.210 --> 00:50:37.670
Wait, but I might wear it, right?
00:50:37.670 --> 00:50:46.340
Like the very next thought is no, wait, maybe I should keep it in case I'm painting and I need like, well we do this.
00:50:46.400 --> 00:50:56.659
And it's like, it's like as soon as you decide to let go, there is that little reaction that comes next that is like, no, wait, let me grab back on.
00:50:57.380 --> 00:51:04.760
And so, um, lobelia is really an amazing relaxing herbs.
00:51:05.840 --> 00:51:18.409
Um, and it's an herb that we work within very low doses because at higher doses it can cause vomiting, which can sometimes be something that you want to have happen.
00:51:18.411 --> 00:51:20.960
But that's not what we're going for in this case.
00:51:21.409 --> 00:51:44.119
In this case, what we're looking for is just that relaxing action and it is relaxing enough that it can be extremely helpful for an asthma attack, for anaphylaxis, um, for, for even like I'm nervous and suddenly my throat feels like it's closing up, even if there's no allergenic reaction going on.
00:51:44.960 --> 00:51:53.329
Um, it that kind of like sudden tensing, even at that really foundational level just of the breath.
00:51:53.389 --> 00:52:07.849
And that's one of the reasons why I really think about it in this way because when you are just considering making change, even when it's abstract and then that response comes up like, Oh no, I don't know.
00:52:08.329 --> 00:52:10.190
I don't know if I could do it right.
00:52:10.190 --> 00:52:13.369
Like just allowing that to relax a little bit.
00:52:13.639 --> 00:52:17.090
And it really, it's just a couple of drops of lobelia tincture.
00:52:17.300 --> 00:52:18.679
And the nice thing is it's tincture.
00:52:18.681 --> 00:52:20.239
You can just carry it with you anywhere.
00:52:21.590 --> 00:52:23.269
Um, so that can be really helpful.
00:52:23.599 --> 00:52:38.599
And I find elder flower can also work in a similar way, much more gently, um, not nearly as, uh, not nearly as like immediate physiological response league.
00:52:39.769 --> 00:52:53.960
Um, but especially when that res, when that tension that you're feeling is emotional, um, elderflower can just go ahead and let you stay open and let you allow things to pass out of you.
00:52:54.019 --> 00:53:03.469
Like, like a fever, you know, like physiologically, that's a thing that other flower is helping with is to allow the fever to sweat out of you.
00:53:03.471 --> 00:53:06.679
Allow the poorest to stay open so that the heat can be released.
00:53:07.369 --> 00:53:15.110
And emotionally it, it functions very similarly to just help you stay open and allow things to release.
00:53:16.070 --> 00:53:17.900
Um, so those are two that are really on my mind there.
00:53:19.489 --> 00:53:19.489
Yeah.
00:53:20.840 --> 00:53:26.380
You know, a lot of times when you make, when you make a change, uh, you know, you can get some pushback
00:53:26.409 --> 00:53:33.309
or you can just be afraid that you're going to get it, that people might look at you that they might, uh, you know,
00:53:33.489 --> 00:53:35.469
make fun of you for yeah.
00:53:35.650 --> 00:53:36.219
Yeah.
00:53:36.340 --> 00:53:37.210
Or whatever it is, you know?
00:53:37.570 --> 00:53:50.019
And so, um, sometimes you do need to, to establish some boundaries around that kind of thing, like, um, to it's best if you can, you know, become comfortable saying, look, this is what I'm doing for myself right now.
00:53:50.021 --> 00:53:56.860
I don't, uh, I'm not looking for critique at this particular moment, you know, however, however you you get it across.
00:53:56.860 --> 00:54:03.130
But to be able to, to feel confident and say, this is something I'm doing, um, I'm sticking to it.
00:54:03.519 --> 00:54:15.849
So that's about boundaries and about, um, establishing them and not holding onto them so tightly that they trap you, uh, you know, or prevent other people from being able to reach you.
00:54:16.840 --> 00:54:20.409
Um, but being appropriately firm with them.
00:54:20.800 --> 00:54:23.829
And so there's an herb that really helps a lot with all of those things.
00:54:23.860 --> 00:54:24.789
And that's mother wart.
00:54:25.809 --> 00:54:25.809
Yeah.
00:54:25.929 --> 00:54:26.199
Yeah.
00:54:26.389 --> 00:54:28.389
Such a lovely, amazing friend.
00:54:29.139 --> 00:54:36.400
I'm just giving you that feeling of confidence to say no when you need to say no.
00:54:37.630 --> 00:54:44.500
Um, confidence to stand in your integrity, stand in the choices that you've made.
00:54:45.760 --> 00:55:24.309
Um, and, and you know, when you've made a choice but you're nervous about implementing it and you're nervous about getting pushed back and you feel that nervousness as like maybe, maybe palpitations or maybe like something a little less than palpitations, but it's still uncomfortable in that like HeartSpace and mother ward is really supportive for that really to just calm that right down and, and taking those physiological responses to our emotional state out of the picture makes it so much easier to stay in a positive emotional state.
00:55:28.000 --> 00:55:29.019
My word is really nice.
00:55:30.780 --> 00:55:30.780
Yeah.
00:55:31.050 --> 00:55:31.050
Yeah.
00:55:32.199 --> 00:55:50.829
I was thinking also about Ella campaign and here I am thinking specifically of the tincture, um, although, although to be honest, I put, I like to put a little Ella campaign in my, not coffee in the morning actually for this very reason.
00:55:51.550 --> 00:56:05.559
Um, but it is a really strong flavor and um, some people don't love it and, and to get the, the effect I want to talk about, uh, some of the tincture is just totally fine and like just a half a squirt of tincture.
00:56:06.130 --> 00:56:14.889
But again, this is about working emotionally with a plant that you maybe have only considered physiologically in the past.
00:56:15.309 --> 00:56:26.349
Um, Alec campaign can be really helpful when you are, are really working to sort of breathe into the changes that you're trying to create in yourself.
00:56:27.159 --> 00:56:31.059
And if you think about that, it really is all about the breath.
00:56:31.150 --> 00:56:40.059
Like all about the becoming, all about the like keeping that breath steady, staying focused on it.
00:56:40.719 --> 00:56:57.039
I'm sort of thinking about meditation here but, but that is so true in, in so many ways that if you are trying to make a change, even if you can fully see the change you want to make you like I know where I'm going.
00:56:57.909 --> 00:57:10.300
Sometimes just taking that step into being that change, like literally breathing life into that change can just be really hard.
00:57:10.480 --> 00:57:11.889
You've got everything set up.
00:57:11.891 --> 00:57:12.880
You're already to go.
00:57:12.880 --> 00:57:16.150
And now the only thing left to do is to make it real.
00:57:16.750 --> 00:57:22.929
And um, this is a place where Ella campaign really, really helps.
00:57:23.710 --> 00:57:24.550
Really helps.
00:57:24.789 --> 00:57:25.239
Yeah.
00:57:26.059 --> 00:57:34.940
So, you know, just a few examples there of some herbs that we've found in, in the particular ways in which they, they can make these kinds of shifts or transitions easier.
00:57:35.989 --> 00:57:45.349
Um, you know, I would say that there's a general case here too, which is that the herbs themselves can be the first pebble on that mountain, right?
00:57:46.760 --> 00:58:01.429
Uh, so very frequently we have people who come in and, uh, you know, we, we'd like to give them a 30 point plan to completely overhaul everything, uh, but we know that that wouldn't be realistic to start with.
00:58:01.909 --> 00:58:20.300
And so frequently, um, the herbs that go into a person's formula, uh, one or more of them is going to be to make the transition easier, to make the, you know, steps two through 300 of our plan, uh, be a little more approachable.
00:58:21.739 --> 00:58:31.579
Um, and so, you know, the, one of the big ideas for this podcast was this concept that a small change can make larger ones more, more attainable, more accessible, and more comfortable.
00:58:32.449 --> 00:58:35.570
Um, and I think that's a place where herbs fit in really, really nicely.
00:58:36.670 --> 00:58:56.400
And even just, it can be as simple as allowing yourself the space to make a cup of tea or a pot of tea that you really enjoy and to then sit down with it and just contemplate how would I be, if I could be different, like what would that even look like?
00:58:56.610 --> 00:59:24.929
And even just allowing that pot of tea regardless of who's in it, you know, to be, to be the container into which you are imagining what, what could be different about your life and the like, you don't have to do anything if you just gave yourself a little bit of space to think differently about like going on for you and just that can be enough.
00:59:25.739 --> 00:59:28.409
And I guess in that way, literally any herb could help.
00:59:29.019 --> 00:59:29.269
Yeah.
00:59:32.309 --> 00:59:32.309
Right.
00:59:33.869 --> 00:59:35.760
Well, so that's us for this week.
00:59:36.599 --> 00:59:37.920
Um, you know, get some shout out.
00:59:37.949 --> 00:59:48.840
Yeah, I have a couple of shout outs and to be honest, I know that there are a few more, um, and I just grabbed two of them real quick and I will go through in an more orderly fashion now.
00:59:49.860 --> 00:59:55.920
Um, but we do have a few new members to the podcast and, uh, supporting members.
00:59:56.159 --> 01:00:03.809
And so I will, um, thank you all officially next in the next episode when I go back and grab all the new names.
01:00:04.079 --> 01:00:09.630
But I really am grateful we both are to all of you who support the podcast.
01:00:10.019 --> 01:00:17.579
And if you would like to join the ranks, you can find out about it@commonwealthirbs.com slash supporter.
01:00:18.869 --> 01:00:38.309
Um, and I also want to give a shout out to Frannie in the Caribbean and with the shutout also comes a question for everybody who's listening because Franny is really excited about Tulsi, but, uh, it's not easy to find in the Caribbean.
01:00:38.880 --> 01:00:48.000
So, um, uh, so first this is a really good time to remember that there's never only one plant who can do any given thing, right?
01:00:48.780 --> 01:00:52.500
There's always more than one plant who can help you in a particular situation.
01:00:52.530 --> 01:01:03.630
And so if Tosi isn't common in a particular area, even though we talk all the time about how helpful Tosi is for us, that's okay cause there's gonna be another plant who can do that kind of work.
01:01:03.630 --> 01:01:05.699
We just have to figure out who it is.
01:01:06.150 --> 01:01:35.789
So, um, that's something that I'm really excited to research and I have some friends that, um, I'm really excited to talk to you about it, but if you are listening to the podcast and you are from the Caribbean or in the Caribbean or maybe, um, you have family there and you are aware of herbs that are Tulsi like, um, in terms of action, then I would love it.
01:01:35.789 --> 01:01:39.150
I'd be super grateful if you shot me an email and let me know.
01:01:39.780 --> 01:01:41.789
Um, so that I can get that information to Franny.
01:01:42.150 --> 01:01:59.400
And um, I'm also going to be asking some friends and um, what I'm going to ask them is I have a few friends from Haiti and the Dominican and I want to ask them to ask their grandmothers to tell them about the way that we work with TLC.
01:01:59.760 --> 01:02:07.320
And then to say, what plants would we work with in the Caribbean who could help us in this way?
01:02:07.920 --> 01:02:18.539
And so a lot of times if you're in a new place and you are like, Oh, none of my normal plants are here, like nobody I would normally turn to is here.
01:02:19.449 --> 01:02:23.650
Um, then you can talk to herbalists in that area.
01:02:24.550 --> 01:02:28.090
Um, and just say, this is the way that I need to work.
01:02:28.090 --> 01:02:30.940
I'm looking for a plant who can work with me on this.
01:02:31.210 --> 01:02:36.429
And the likelihood is that they're going to say, Oh yeah, here we work with this plant when we have that problem.
01:02:36.460 --> 01:02:45.489
So, so, uh, that's research that I'm working on and if you have any knowledge that could help me out with that, I would appreciate it.
01:02:46.000 --> 01:02:52.809
And I also wanted to give a shout out to mrs Sanger on Instagram who volunteered to transcribe videos for us.
01:02:52.840 --> 01:02:54.190
And I'm so grateful.
01:02:54.190 --> 01:02:54.849
Thank you.
01:02:55.300 --> 01:03:01.329
Not only does that enable our incarcerated students to study urbalism because they're not allowed to watch the videos.
01:03:01.331 --> 01:03:15.070
They're only allowed to receive printed pages of transcript, but it also helps us to get to our goal of closed captioning, the whole program so that we can support the deaf, the hard of hearing and the hearing impaired community.
01:03:15.880 --> 01:03:29.650
Um, and in order to do that, the first step is that we have to have written transcripts of every video in order to then take the technological steps that we need to take of getting the files that will provide those, those close captions.
01:03:30.159 --> 01:03:45.429
So when people volunteer to transcribe videos for us, um, that is, or with us, I guess that is really helping to communities, um, that we're really excited to be able to provide herbal knowledge to.
01:03:46.269 --> 01:03:47.679
So thank you so much.
01:03:48.429 --> 01:03:49.510
Yeah, absolutely.
01:03:49.960 --> 01:03:50.889
We couldn't do without y'all.
01:03:52.780 --> 01:03:53.139
All right.
01:03:53.170 --> 01:04:13.690
And I will organize all the rest of the shout outs for the next episode, but I'm just so glad that you guys are here and I'm grateful that we have this community of people that we can share our honest, real lives with and our own struggles with going to bed on time and getting enough movement and everything else.
01:04:13.750 --> 01:04:38.500
And that we can have this community where we're all just honest about what we're working on and that that's fine because it's great to just be working on stuff and to be doing it together don't have to be perfect, but I'm really happy that we have all of you guys to be in this community of working on it together.
01:04:38.800 --> 01:04:39.909
Yeah, likewise.
01:04:40.989 --> 01:04:41.199
All right.
01:04:41.201 --> 01:04:43.809
We'll be back next week, and so then take care of yourselves.
01:04:43.811 --> 01:04:48.070
Drink some tea, and go for a walk through some pebbles down the mountain.
01:04:48.909 --> 01:04:50.139
Yes, yes.
01:04:50.141 --> 01:04:51.969
Let's be an avalanche together.
01:04:52.630 --> 01:04:52.869
Bye.
01:04:53.139 --> 01:04:53.619
Bye.
01:05:04.710 --> 01:05:04.710
[inaudible].