The Authenticity Lie: Why Most Personal Brands Are Still Fake

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Hello and welcome back to the podcast. We have Jill Motherfuckin' standing in the house.
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Welcome my bestie.
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My goodness!
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I love just being here with any time I get to chat with you, win.
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But now make it a podcast recording and people get in on our like actual insanity together.
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Double win. Like I'm here for it and I'm so happy we're recording and I love you so much.
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I love you and your Grammy.
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I need to tell you like I met Jill and then I was like an explosion happened in the universe.
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Literally I was like, where have you been my whole life? Holy shit!
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Okay, but do you remember like really our first ever time hanging out?
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Like obviously was at the dinner party that I hosted but then it was, was that Tina's event and we got in trouble for talking so much.
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We were just like, she was like, shut up.
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We were like, shut the back.
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My guest speakers shut up.
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We were both speaking at Tina's event and then I'm sure we got Anita in trouble as well.
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Shut out Anita, we love you.
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Coo-coo-coo-coo-coo-coo.
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I know, oh my gosh.
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Love that about Anita. Coo-coo-coo.
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So Jill's tangent for anyone that doesn't know like my face hurts and it's like one minute and 19 seconds in.
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I know, it's gonna be ridiculous.
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Brace yourself guys.
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I know, tell, get ready, buckle your fucking seat belts.
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Okay, if you think I'm crazy, you gotta see us together. It's the best.
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And I wish she was my neighbor but my neighborhood would just explode.
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Okay, so tell the people.
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We would be kicked out.
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Who like, what have you been doing?
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Where did you come from?
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What did you do?
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We're a Bucala Joe.
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I feel like I'm gonna sing that song.
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Where did you come from?
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Where did you go?
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Take us back to the 90s dance hits though.
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Oh my gosh.
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Oh my gosh.
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Okay, so I'm Canadian but I've lived all over the world and I'm currently parked in Puket, Thailand.
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Absolutely love it.
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I live in like never, never land for adults but like in a positive way.
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So I've been in this space what feels like a hundred years.
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But I've got into this space in 2012.
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But I had also like, I started a web TV show back in the Skinner Sound Insane 2006.
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So that is like the days of my space really.
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It was the year that Google bought YouTube.
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And so I had a web TV show called 20-something.
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Thank God I did it when you could erase stuff from the internet because no one needs that out there right now.
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Like I would be canceled for sure with all the sexy things that I revealed.
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Like I would definitely be called a hoe these days.
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Me too.
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But I, yeah, just I always knew that I was never meant to follow a traditional path in hashtag fucking entrepreneurship.
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And just always hated being told what to do.
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And couldn't ever imagine giving up any level of freedom or sovereignty to just have my life controlled by someone else.
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And so I knew that straight out of the gate but it took me along as time to actually find my way in this.
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So I started in 2006.
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And that sounds ridiculous except that web TV show I'm asked over a million views.
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Like back in the day.
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So I started cutting my teeth there.
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I learned how to speak to camera.
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I learned how to outline episodes.
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I started learning how to write for the web.
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And then I met Josh.
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My, I call him my husband.
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So he is my ex husband but we're very much on fantastic terms.
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Like he's one of my favorite people.
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Truly one of my best friends.
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So he's my husband.
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And I met him in 2009 and he really opened up my eyes to the world of online entrepreneurship.
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And so he was the sound so ridiculous to say but he was truly like my first ever mentor in the space.
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He taught me about email lists and traffic and SEO and writing for you know certain levels of visibility and how to create like really catchy videos.
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And this is like honestly guys we're talking about gaming the system of YouTube back in 2011-2012.
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Like when you could rank for long tail keywords like this is how early we got started and it taught me so much.
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And so we had an affiliate business that was so funny because we were starting.
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We're talking about starting our own businesses because we each had sorry we started talking about having a business together.
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We each had our own separate businesses.
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And I remember him floating the idea of us starting a business together.
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I was like done.
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I mean what are we doing?
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And he was like I feel like we should start an affiliate site and I was like sweet.
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Okay.
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What's an affiliate site?
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Like I was just so green.
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And like I said he taught me the ropes and then that evolved into people asking us how will we make a money?
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Like how are you guys traveling everywhere?
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What are you drug dealers?
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And so then we started screw the nine to five.
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And that really it took us a few years to find our feet in that but that really like exploded our trajectory.
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We built an amazing community.
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They called themselves this groupies like screw groupies.
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We just had such a cool thing.
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We had built such an amazing movement.
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And then we had our son and all the sudden things started to feel a bit shaky.
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Like do we want to keep doing this?
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Is this how we want to grow our business?
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Like we had a membership at the time.
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I had no boundaries at the time.
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So I was just like constantly living in the membership community.
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But it was just like I don't know.
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It was it was so beautiful for that time.
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Yeah.
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And then at the end of 2018 after we had had our son we made the decision to close down everything that no longer served us.
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And that was really before people thought to do that kind of stuff.
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You know, like these are the days of like Marie Forleo being on top.
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And like the Amy Porterfields and the James Wedmores and the stews and the Dunkins and you know Derek Helper.
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And all of this kind of stuff.
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People weren't really shutting down proven offers that were making a ton of money.
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And I remember someone saying like aren't you scared of what's going to happen.
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And I was like no.
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This is I'm doing what's true to me.
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We are doing what's true to us.
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And I just couldn't imagine I know that we're going to talk about the power of authenticity.
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But I literally could not imagine trying to make money in a way that isn't congruent to who I wanted to be.
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It was I was just so fucking unavailable for it.
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You know what I mean? And it felt so deeply performative to try and pretend that we wanted any of this kind of stuff when deep down.
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I just felt like we were faking it.
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And I also felt like the people who were in our community deserve so much more than just like phoning it in from us.
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So we hosted a goodbye party for our membership on New Year's Eve 2018.
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Everyone got to share their favorite memory.
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Like this community was amazing. They called themselves a scrumly.
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They threw me a baby shower.
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Like they were so.
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It was just such a special time in our lives.
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And then we kicked off 2019 with like a blank slate.
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And in the first eight to 12 weeks of 2019, we made all of 2018's revenue.
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And I concretely believe that that is because we truly went to bat for ourselves and we made a bold, a bold move in service of our alignment.
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And we really anchored into what was authentic and true for us.
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And because of that, it fucking magnetized people into our world in even bigger ways than we ever had previous to that.
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And then in same in 2019, once I had like blank space, I had like mental white space and came the idea for millionaire girls club.
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And I kind of sat on that for a minute because I just didn't believe in myself yet in in the way that I could hold space for women doing millions of dollars each year.
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I was just like, come on, that is not not not for me.
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Now I see that was like divine protection because if I were to start MGC in 2019, my first event would have been 2020 and I would have been fucked.
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So I actually started at the end of 2020 and really started to kick it off in 2021.
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And that's where I went to a whole other level of my own clarity, my own self belief, my own self trust, my own authenticity, my own courage and started to build my own thing for the first time.
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Turns out I hate the business model of just running events.
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Now I combine, now I combine all the coaching I was doing for the chicks in MGC, which is always typically identity and personal power.
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Because once you're at that level of doing a few mill year, it's not like you need a lot of more strategy, you know, like you've solved that.
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What you need is deeper levels of personal power and a higher level of your identity.
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And so once that all started to click for me, that's when I started really starting to lean into that level of coaching, which is where my J Asperin comes into play now.
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Okay, so first of all, I have to tell you, we, so everyone listening, me and Jill were hanging out and we were at her dinner party and I was like, I love her.
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She the best. This is so great. And I don't know when it was, if it was when I saw you in America and Nashville, or if it was in the Gold Coast, no, wasn't the Gold Coast.
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We already were deep, we were knee deep by then, but we were deeply in love by then.
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We were hanging out in Nashville. And I feel like you said something and then I was like, and it was like something pinged in my head.
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And I was like, Oh, my God. Oh, my God. I listened to your podcast or they made part of field.
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So I'm so fucking weird because I didn't know, you know, when you meet people, you don't know the whole story and everything that they've done.
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I was like, Oh, that sounds cool. Like who started bro, but I don't know anything, but I was like, wait, you said, but I don't know anything.
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I don't know anything about you. Nice to meet you. But then I was like, I feel like I've heard something and then I was listening to your voice and I was like, Oh, my fucking God.
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So there was more than one episode of Amy and Port of Fields podcast where you and Josh were on.
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And I feel like there was one where you guys were talking about how you fucking made a Facebook group of like 55,000 people.
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And I was like, bitch, I listened to that podcast and I was like, how the hell do you build a group of 55,000 people?
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And everyone listening was so crazy because I was like, Oh, my God, you're the lady that I was listening to on the podcast.
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And then I was like, ping pong, ping. Okay, click hilarious. Like fucking wild that that was the journey.
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And then you guys let go of that business. And I love what you said. And we're going to talk about it today about the alignment and authenticity.
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And like, I'm not going to do some shit that's not going to make me fully happy and fully fulfilled.
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But no, to the external world, it's working. You're making money.
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I mean, who's closing shit now? All kinds of people are about to demolish it that doesn't serve them.
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So now, Jill, today, what you do now, who are you helping now? And what is the part about personal power and identity that you think is needed and missing right now in our fucking business landscape for women?
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That's 90% of the game.
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It's I get that everyone thinks that strategy is important, but any strategy works when you are in your power going for it.
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And it's not about the strategy. It's about who's running the strategy. And if your self concept and your self image isn't dialed in.
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And if you do not believe in yourself, if you do not have the self trust and the self belief to show up as your authentic self, to show up as your most powerful self to take the kind of swings that you know you want to take to make the kind of fucking courageous moves that you know match your future.
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No matter strategy is going to fucking matter because you're going to sabotage it left right and center because you do not have the internal state or the internal identity that matches who you want to become.
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And so I help a lot of women who I always say I hope that like I help activate the future millionaires icons and bad bitches of this space to go to their next level of growth power and success because so many of them are running their businesses unconsciously fucking strategy hopping all over the
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mother fucking place looking for the thing that clicks and they don't realize that they're the thing that makes it all click.
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And so what I love doing is working with women who want to win the ones who want to be the stars of their industry, the ones who want to do big shit, the ones who don't mind being misunderstood by you know everyone else who's chasing mediocrity.
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I want to work with the ones who want to show themselves what they're fucking made of and that relies on a deep level of personal power and an elevated identity because without that you both won most certainly blend into the noise because you're not going to say anything worth listening to nothing
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disruptive you're going to make safe small moves and you're not going to show yourself what you're made of because you're just going to cool yourself back down when you feel like you're getting to be too big or too much or it's all happening too fast.
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It's like no, no, that's the sign that you're on the right path. You just need the internal state that matches that.
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Oh, and can you see if I had the horn sound.
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It's somewhere on my fucking desktop.
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But then my shit will explode and then we'll have camera issues that me and Jill are not techy, but we are working to stay out friends.
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So please give us a shout out in the comments as to how great we look on camera right now because it's hard for real.
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Don't even ask me about ISO settings.
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What is your aperture? It's like fuck, I don't know. We're going to go on YouTube.
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But can you see if you're watching how much I love this woman and why? Because you are a firecracker.
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You're a fucking activator. You're an amplifier.
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When you see women coming in right now to your clients, those that are booking with you, joining your calls, coming to your programs,
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and even the ones that were like you were working with the top women in their industry and they were coming to your retreats.
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So you've been holding high level incredible.
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The women all of you guys like on Instagram and social media that you love, like the superstars.
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That's who Jill holds base with and supports.
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So what is their biggest problem? Like why aren't we as women stepping into our fucking power, saying what we want?
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What are you seeing when you're coaching and sharing and teaching like the inside of women's brains? What's going on?
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They're often worried about being too much.
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They're often worried about being themselves.
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What happens if I say this? What happens if I take this stance?
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What happens if people don't like it? It's like the ones who like it will really fucking like it.
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And then the ones who don't like, forgive and release.
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You know, like you are not here to serve everyone.
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You're here to serve the ones who get it.
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The ones who are here for that message at that right time delivered by you.
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And I think just.
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Well, I think this is kind of starting to slow down because every not everyone, but a lot of people got the shit kicked out of them in 2025, right?
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And so a lot of them are coming into 2026 being like, I give so many less fucks than I used to give.
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You know what I mean? They're just like it was like it stripped away all the like white knuckle behavior that so many of us were caught up in trying to control people's perceptions,
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trying to make sure we didn't rock the boat.
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I feel like during the time of like the COVID bubble when everyone was fucking policing what everyone else said.
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I feel like we're starting to watch that happen again, but people are less susceptible to it.
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And so they're standing in their convictions, they're standing their ground, they're standing behind their beliefs and their values.
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And I think so often, I mean, I've served some people who are like Beyonce of their industry.
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You know, and they believed that if they were in search thing here that it would just be like a tsunami of refunds or being called out or being canceled again or whatever it is.
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But like really what I help women do is create this baseline where they're just uncancellable.
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It doesn't it doesn't matter if people the only way someone can cancel is cancel you as if you let them.
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Truly, I believe that.
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Like if you are unavailable to their outrage and you're just like, okay, bro, don't pay attention to me then.
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You can literally just don't follow and I could just be someone in your feed that you no longer follow.
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It can be as simple as that.
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You do not have to work with me, you do not have to follow me, you know, you do not have to buy my stuff.
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And so I think people are slowly but surely coming to that awareness of like actually it deeply serves me to stand behind my convictions or to be convicted in my values or in what I stand for or what I'm willing to tolerate or what I'm not willing to tolerate.
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And all of that work is the work of personal power and self leadership to be able to hold yourself through the projections of other people online.
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Like perfect example, I'm running a thing called resurrected.
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It's in like two days from now, right? And so I'm running traffic for that.
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And I literally just have one video where I just it's like a selfie video just walking and this chick commented on it like explain why you feel the need to why you're so insecure that you need to show your boobs in order to market first off.
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Literally had a shirt that was like up to here.
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Like no boobs in the shot at all.
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And she's like, why are you so insecure? And I just wrote back it ain't me who's insecure, babe.
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Yeah, ain't me, babe.
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It is like it's literally not me who's insecure. It's you.
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Yeah. And once you can see that it's their projections and their reflection of their own self worth that most people are pushing at you, then you you're like, oh, turns out I don't actually care as much then.
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Because I can't control what someone else might might think they are believe about me.
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And so why not just be my fullest self because then I'm going to magnetize the people in who get it like perfect example, Erica, you like literally you and I are a lot for a lot of people.
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We are not meant to be like for everyone.
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Right? We're enneagram eights like we're big energy.
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Yeah.
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I'm a manifesto in human design like we are meant to shake shit up.
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So of course we're not meant for anyone or just everyone.
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Yeah, and it's just anyone permission for you to really and I think you know, people haven't spent enough time going, who am I?
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Who do I want to be? What's my voice in my head? Not everybody else.
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And then when someone goes, I don't like coriander.
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And I love fucking coriander. So I'll just be coriander, right?
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Right? We're obsessed with coriander, right?
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A little mini coriander tattoo is we should get on our tramp stamps.
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It's like, we love coriander.
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You know?
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It is.
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What is this?
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It's coriander.
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You know?
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And it's like, oh, I don't like it.
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It's like great.
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Like how awesome that you could be who you are and allow people to go, you're not for me.
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But to trick people into pretending to be vanilla one size fits all.
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I'm like, I have neutrality.
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Then someone figures you out and then goes, oh, actually you like this?
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What?
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I didn't know you did it.
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Like then they feel like deceived by you and you are kind of manipulating and deceiving people to like you so that you don't feel uncomfortable with going fuck you out of care if you like me or not.
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I'm a be me.
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Psych.
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I mean, think about all the people that you truly follow online.
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Right?
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And not just you eat.
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Like everyone listening to this.
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Think about the women that you, like you can't stop watching, listening to or buying from.
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I guarantee they are not watering themselves down in service of pleasing you.
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The ones we are so magnetized to are authentically themselves.
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They are in their own power.
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They are doing what they want to do and that's why we can't look away.
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Yeah.
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Because most people do not allow themselves to be that or do that or show up that way, which is why we're all like moss to a flame when someone does show up like that.
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Yeah.
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And you can see it.
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It's like all the shit, all the performative nonsense from, you know, fuck man, like 2016 up until 2022.
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Just 2023 maybe just no longer works like.
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Yeah.
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Like that, that's just, that's done guys.
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Yeah.
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Like the performative nice girl shit.
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That's done.
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It's over.
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People are, they do not want that anymore.
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They want to know who you are.
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They want to know what you stand for in insert thing here.
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It doesn't have to be politics or current events, but in a way that is relevant to them.
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They want to know that they believe that you are who you say you are.
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That's what we are coming into the era where you have to be who you say you are.
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Otherwise, you're just like, you're truly cannibalizing your own business.
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Yeah.
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And you know what?
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It brings us to the topic of authenticity.
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And I want to say what you just said, I, I'm lucky, right?
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Like I'm very lucky and or people are scared.
282
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I don't know, but I don't get trolls on my social media.
283
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We obviously get trolls on Facebook ads because they fucking their Facebook.
284
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I don't know what happens there.
285
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But like with my audience of 120,000, whatever people, I don't get trolls.
286
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I don't get nasty comments.
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Bless.
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Like my audience is amazing and great, right?
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But I said a long time ago when I decided to put my face on the internet.
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Like I'ma get trolls.
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People are going to talk shit.
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They're going to hate.
293
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They're going to just like this that and the other.
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They're going to talk all kinds of shit about me as a mother, my children.
295
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I'm just ready.
296
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Like I'm not looking for it, but I'm ready if they come.
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I'm not going to be like, oh dear, you troll me.
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What?
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Like you want to be a public figure or you want to put your face on the internet?
300
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Like you can't hide behind a faceless account.
301
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People will say they hate your hair, they hate your pink, whatever the fuck, right?
302
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So I think for me, I've always looked forward to it and been like it's going to be a thing that happens.
303
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But it doesn't talk to me about authenticity is a fucking buzz word.
304
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And we've been talking about that in our WhatsApp.
305
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You should hear our WhatsApp.
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It's the best place to be.
307
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We're just having the shots.
308
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But like it's apparently trending authenticity.
309
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In case you didn't know.
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Isn't that hilarious?
311
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It's like phone or ability like FAUX.
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Yeah, faux.
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Yeah.
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It's like that.
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It's like I, when someone's like authenticity is the new business strategy.
316
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I'm like that you've already missed the point.
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Yeah.
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Like you've already not been authentic in your pursuit of authenticity.
319
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You're like, okay, I've heard that it works in business now.
320
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So now I'm going to do it.
321
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It's like you're done.
322
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You're toast.
323
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Yeah, missed it.
324
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It's like it takes courage first off.
325
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So authenticity is my second top value.
326
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My top values are courage, authenticity, connection, audacity.
327
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And I could go on, but whatever, right?
328
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So it takes courage to be authentic.
329
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And authenticity is how you breed connection.
330
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You're like, concretely believe that.
331
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And if you truly want to create an audience of people who get you believe it
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in what you are sharing, whatever, it's like you don't have to build the business that has a community element to it.
333
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But if you are building a personal brand that has some sort of audience element to it,
334
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some sort of community element to it, then it is in your best interest to allow them to see who you truly are.
335
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From as you right now, they do not want the facade.
336
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They can see straight through it.
337
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People can smell that shit from a mile away now.
338
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And that's why people like you are so fucking refreshing.
339
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Because most people can't do it.
340
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Yeah.
341
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And own it the way that you can.
342
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Perfect example.
343
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Like this is the perfect example of you offline.
344
00:23:44.000 --> 00:23:46.000
So when we were getting ready for your book launch party,
345
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and we were at that Melbourne market,
346
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and you were like, I don't know,
347
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himing and hawing about something.
348
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And this dude was behind us.
349
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And I was like, he wants to like blah, blah.
350
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And you're like, I don't give a fuck what he wants.
351
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And I was like, oh my god.
352
00:24:00.000 --> 00:24:07.000
It was like yet another layer of that level of permission coming into my life,
353
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which you have been such a beautiful amplify me.
354
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Because I think before I made like before 2025,
355
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yes, I was like quote unquote authentically myself,
356
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but not in a loud kind of way.
357
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How I allow myself to like stand behind my positions,
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allowed myself to start sharing more of that kind of shit.
359
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Which is again, I feel as though you've been a beautiful amplifier
360
00:24:32.000 --> 00:24:34.000
for that of that for me.
361
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Because you are so yourself.
362
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So yourself, like who you are online is who you are offline.
363
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And I deeply, deeply appreciate people like that.
364
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Because I feel as though I'm also that.
365
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Like I can't imagine managing two different personalities.
366
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That's way too exhausting.
367
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No way.
368
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And people don't want it.
369
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No.
370
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And you'll never have the connection you say you want.
371
00:24:55.000 --> 00:24:57.000
No, and you know what sucks is he is a thing like,
372
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Hey, Mish is more introverted, right?
373
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But lately he's been more outroverted.
374
00:25:00.000 --> 00:25:03.000
So I'm like, I feel like I need to stop saying that because he is not
375
00:25:03.000 --> 00:25:07.000
the man that I once met where I was more quiet and didn't really like the camera,
376
00:25:07.000 --> 00:25:09.000
didn't really like being with people.
377
00:25:09.000 --> 00:25:12.000
Now he's he's done something where he's or we've done something together
378
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where he's shifting and he can be with people.
379
00:25:14.000 --> 00:25:15.000
He can say like shut the fuck up.
380
00:25:15.000 --> 00:25:16.000
Buh-buh-buh.
381
00:25:16.000 --> 00:25:18.000
He's got a bit of fuego and he used to be very like,
382
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oh, sweet.
383
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And now I can take him to the United States.
384
00:25:21.000 --> 00:25:23.000
You know, like I bet he's going to get mugged.
385
00:25:23.000 --> 00:25:25.000
Like he'll, I think he'll beat somebody up.
386
00:25:25.000 --> 00:25:27.000
Like, hey, Mish has got some fire, you know?
387
00:25:27.000 --> 00:25:29.000
I'm like, you're a sprinkling Puerto Rico all over you.
388
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All right, I like it.
389
00:25:30.000 --> 00:25:35.000
But I say that because he is not interested so much in being like,
390
00:25:35.000 --> 00:25:36.000
hey, come and talk to me.
391
00:25:36.000 --> 00:25:37.000
Come and take a photo with me.
392
00:25:37.000 --> 00:25:40.000
Hey, Leicester, like he wouldn't stand in the line to sign
393
00:25:40.000 --> 00:25:42.000
700 books.
394
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Like I will stand and hug and write a novel in it.
395
00:25:45.000 --> 00:25:46.000
Like I love that shit.
396
00:25:46.000 --> 00:25:47.000
But he's not online.
397
00:25:47.000 --> 00:25:49.000
Literally he has not posted.
398
00:25:49.000 --> 00:25:51.000
I do collaborative posts with the man because he never posts.
399
00:25:51.000 --> 00:25:53.000
He doesn't have any stories.
400
00:25:53.000 --> 00:25:56.000
So he's not like leading you on to think that he's so cool online.
401
00:25:56.000 --> 00:25:59.000
But then you meet him in real life and he's got no personality.
402
00:25:59.000 --> 00:26:00.000
100%.
403
00:26:00.000 --> 00:26:03.000
When you follow someone and I think I didn't know that this was a thing
404
00:26:03.000 --> 00:26:07.000
until someone said to me, oh my god, you're like exactly you are online in person.
405
00:26:07.000 --> 00:26:11.000
And I was like, yeah, what do I imagine?
406
00:26:11.000 --> 00:26:15.000
A lot of people that I meet that like they look and I've seen it and you've seen it.
407
00:26:15.000 --> 00:26:18.000
And you go out to meet these women empowering women,
408
00:26:18.000 --> 00:26:21.000
massive people that run massive women's only networks.
409
00:26:21.000 --> 00:26:25.000
And you're like, oh, you're going to be dope as fuck because you're about women.
410
00:26:25.000 --> 00:26:29.000
And you go up and you feel this energetic electric fence.
411
00:26:29.000 --> 00:26:31.000
Like don't fucking get next to me.
412
00:26:31.000 --> 00:26:35.000
Yeah, like I want to connect with you through my electric fence.
413
00:26:35.000 --> 00:26:38.000
And because we do the work we do, we're like, who hurt you?
414
00:26:38.000 --> 00:26:41.000
Like fuck, we got to heal that because I caps our impact.
415
00:26:41.000 --> 00:26:45.000
Or it gives a facade that we say we want to help people that empower women.
416
00:26:45.000 --> 00:26:48.000
But only some women, only the women I know, only the cool women,
417
00:26:48.000 --> 00:26:50.000
only the whatever women, not all women.
418
00:26:50.000 --> 00:26:53.000
Like if you're a nobody with 400 followers, I'm not going to talk to you.
419
00:26:53.000 --> 00:26:55.000
And it's like, why the fuck not?
420
00:26:55.000 --> 00:26:57.000
Like maybe that lady with 400 followers needs to talk to you.
421
00:26:57.000 --> 00:26:59.000
Like that drives me bananas.
422
00:26:59.000 --> 00:27:03.000
And so I think that the more we can be who we are behind the scenes in front of the scenes.
423
00:27:03.000 --> 00:27:06.000
And it leads to fucking freedom.
424
00:27:06.000 --> 00:27:07.000
And you're only free.
425
00:27:07.000 --> 00:27:10.000
When you're free from yourself, you're not chained internally.
426
00:27:10.000 --> 00:27:11.000
Yes.
427
00:27:11.000 --> 00:27:14.000
Then speak to that because I know you do a lot with the identity,
428
00:27:14.000 --> 00:27:17.000
with like the thoughts, the beliefs, like the cage people put themselves in.
429
00:27:17.000 --> 00:27:19.000
And they're not allowed to be XYZ.
430
00:27:19.000 --> 00:27:21.000
So then they are trapped internally.
431
00:27:21.000 --> 00:27:23.000
And then people feel that extra 100%.
432
00:27:23.000 --> 00:27:26.000
And I just think it's like the energy of liberation.
433
00:27:26.000 --> 00:27:30.000
When you give yourself the permission to really just,
434
00:27:31.000 --> 00:27:35.000
it sounds like it should not be this radical to just be yourself.
435
00:27:35.000 --> 00:27:38.000
But for some reason, yeah.
436
00:27:38.000 --> 00:27:39.000
Hell yeah.
437
00:27:39.000 --> 00:27:43.000
That's when I, like when Josh and I separated,
438
00:27:43.000 --> 00:27:48.000
that was the energy that we made this move in was a energy of liberation.
439
00:27:48.000 --> 00:27:52.000
It's like we liberated ourselves from something that was complete.
440
00:27:52.000 --> 00:27:55.000
We, our marriage had completed its chapter.
441
00:27:55.000 --> 00:27:57.000
Like it was very clear to us.
442
00:27:57.000 --> 00:28:02.000
And so we made that decision in service of liberation of like I love you enough
443
00:28:02.000 --> 00:28:05.000
that I want you to go live your best next chapter.
444
00:28:05.000 --> 00:28:07.000
And I want you to want that for me as well.
445
00:28:07.000 --> 00:28:08.000
And he does.
446
00:28:08.000 --> 00:28:11.000
So like liberation, not even just in a marriage sense or in relationships,
447
00:28:11.000 --> 00:28:15.000
but in who you are and how you allow yourself to be perceived.
448
00:28:15.000 --> 00:28:17.000
That's the main thing.
449
00:28:17.000 --> 00:28:19.000
People are just trying to control other people's perceptions.
450
00:28:19.000 --> 00:28:21.000
And they think that's strategic.
451
00:28:21.000 --> 00:28:24.000
It's not, it's actually fucking manipulative.
452
00:28:24.000 --> 00:28:28.000
Which people aren't typically available to hear because they're like I'm not being manipulative.
453
00:28:28.000 --> 00:28:34.000
If you are trying to put out there a certain persona that is not aligned with who you are,
454
00:28:34.000 --> 00:28:36.000
I'm sorry, but that is emotionally manipulative.
455
00:28:36.000 --> 00:28:39.000
You might not want to hear it, but it's exactly like people pleasing.
456
00:28:39.000 --> 00:28:41.000
People think that people pleasing is nice.
457
00:28:41.000 --> 00:28:42.000
No.
458
00:28:42.000 --> 00:28:46.000
It's actually emotional manipulation trying to control how someone experiences you.
459
00:28:46.000 --> 00:28:47.000
Totally.
460
00:28:47.000 --> 00:28:49.000
Trying to control what they think say or believe about you.
461
00:28:49.000 --> 00:28:50.000
Yeah.
462
00:28:50.000 --> 00:28:51.000
It's mean as fuck.
463
00:28:51.000 --> 00:28:53.000
Like I always talk about like be kind, say no.
464
00:28:53.000 --> 00:28:55.000
Like don't say yes to be nice.
465
00:28:55.000 --> 00:28:56.000
Because I like that.
466
00:28:56.000 --> 00:28:57.000
Yes.
467
00:28:57.000 --> 00:29:00.000
And they're like this pitch doesn't she know that I know she doesn't know because you said yes.
468
00:29:00.000 --> 00:29:02.000
So you're acting exactly.
469
00:29:02.000 --> 00:29:04.000
You actually mean when you say yes.
470
00:29:04.000 --> 00:29:06.000
If you said no, you'd be nice to that person.
471
00:29:06.000 --> 00:29:07.000
And it's wild.
472
00:29:07.000 --> 00:29:10.000
I think we were talking about this Jill because I think right now,
473
00:29:10.000 --> 00:29:14.000
2026 what we will be seeing is more storytelling.
474
00:29:14.000 --> 00:29:17.000
We'll be seeing more people trying to share themselves and share their
475
00:29:17.000 --> 00:29:20.000
air quotes authentic behavior online and all of that jazz.
476
00:29:20.000 --> 00:29:23.000
And I think I would love for you as the listener,
477
00:29:23.000 --> 00:29:26.000
the watcher of this to be aware.
478
00:29:26.000 --> 00:29:30.000
Like start to work on your own connection with yourself and your intuition.
479
00:29:30.000 --> 00:29:33.000
And I want to ask you Jill, like when you work with women,
480
00:29:33.000 --> 00:29:38.000
how can we help the listener to like be more discerning?
481
00:29:38.000 --> 00:29:40.000
Like it might, it must be hard.
482
00:29:40.000 --> 00:29:42.000
Like we're here now, but we weren't always here.
483
00:29:42.000 --> 00:29:44.000
I dated a bunch of dumbasses.
484
00:29:44.000 --> 00:29:47.000
I did some shit with some dumb men.
485
00:29:47.000 --> 00:29:51.000
I was taken for a ride, you know, my responsibility.
486
00:29:51.000 --> 00:29:55.000
But I was really not watching and not looking and not being discerning.
487
00:29:55.000 --> 00:29:58.000
And none of it was coming from internal power, personal power.
488
00:29:58.000 --> 00:30:00.000
Like you say, I didn't have any.
489
00:30:00.000 --> 00:30:01.000
I didn't think I had any.
490
00:30:01.000 --> 00:30:02.000
I was looking out for the answers.
491
00:30:02.000 --> 00:30:05.000
And so to anyone that's listening that's like, yeah,
492
00:30:05.000 --> 00:30:08.000
but how the fuck do I know who to pay, who to work with, who to follow,
493
00:30:08.000 --> 00:30:09.000
who to listen to?
494
00:30:09.000 --> 00:30:11.000
How can I tell if someone's being fake or real?
495
00:30:11.000 --> 00:30:15.000
Like what are some things that you can talk to on that?
496
00:30:15.000 --> 00:30:19.000
I feel like just, well, especially if it's a mentor that you're going to hire,
497
00:30:19.000 --> 00:30:21.000
I feel like having a conversation with them.
498
00:30:21.000 --> 00:30:24.000
Like I feel like especially if it's a high ticket package,
499
00:30:24.000 --> 00:30:27.000
you absolutely have the right to ask questions.
500
00:30:27.000 --> 00:30:30.000
And also, I imagine the people, I think we're coming to a time,
501
00:30:30.000 --> 00:30:35.000
or at least I hope we're coming to a time where pedestal in coaches is over.
502
00:30:35.000 --> 00:30:39.000
Like it's just, you know, like it doesn't matter.
503
00:30:39.000 --> 00:30:41.000
Well, it does matter who you're working with.
504
00:30:41.000 --> 00:30:44.000
But what I'm trying to say is like the cool girl mentors,
505
00:30:44.000 --> 00:30:48.000
like we don't just have to do it for posturing or positioning.
506
00:30:48.000 --> 00:30:53.000
I encourage anyone who's listening to this to find the people who match your values
507
00:30:53.000 --> 00:30:57.000
or to find the people who are where you say you want to be.
508
00:30:57.000 --> 00:31:01.000
And on the flip side of that, I feel like you have to know your values.
509
00:31:01.000 --> 00:31:06.000
Like I would be really doing like, what are the virtues that,
510
00:31:06.000 --> 00:31:09.000
that, how do I want to say this?
511
00:31:09.000 --> 00:31:13.000
It's like, think about who you want to be this time in 2027.
512
00:31:13.000 --> 00:31:16.000
Okay? Like what does she look like?
513
00:31:16.000 --> 00:31:17.000
What does she believe?
514
00:31:17.000 --> 00:31:18.000
How does she operate?
515
00:31:18.000 --> 00:31:24.000
What are the characteristics or the ways of being the virtues that guide her behavior?
516
00:31:24.000 --> 00:31:28.000
Or that guide who she is in business, in life, in her relationships?
517
00:31:28.000 --> 00:31:30.000
Like what are those ways of being?
518
00:31:30.000 --> 00:31:32.000
So get clear on that.
519
00:31:32.000 --> 00:31:37.000
And then start leading yourself through those virtues now and look for the mentors
520
00:31:37.000 --> 00:31:41.000
who either amplify that for you or can help bring it out of you.
521
00:31:41.000 --> 00:31:44.000
I feel like that is where we have to start looking for mentorship.
522
00:31:44.000 --> 00:31:48.000
It's not just like who's worked with who or who's made this much money.
523
00:31:48.000 --> 00:31:50.000
You never know someone's back end.
524
00:31:50.000 --> 00:31:55.000
You never know like when they're talking about like all these fucking screen shots,
525
00:31:55.000 --> 00:31:58.000
income screenshots with like no context.
526
00:31:58.000 --> 00:32:00.000
That's just doesn't matter.
527
00:32:00.000 --> 00:32:02.000
It is so easy to fake that stuff.
528
00:32:02.000 --> 00:32:03.000
Yeah.
529
00:32:03.000 --> 00:32:05.000
AI baby income screenshots with.
530
00:32:05.000 --> 00:32:06.000
Yeah, man.
531
00:32:06.000 --> 00:32:10.000
Like it just doesn't need to be the deciding factor for you.
532
00:32:10.000 --> 00:32:14.000
Like someone who makes a lot of money does not mean that they're happy on the inside
533
00:32:14.000 --> 00:32:16.000
or it doesn't mean that they keep that much money
534
00:32:16.000 --> 00:32:19.000
or it doesn't mean that they're doing it in a way that feels morally aligned
535
00:32:19.000 --> 00:32:21.000
with how you would want to do it.
536
00:32:21.000 --> 00:32:22.000
Yeah.
537
00:32:22.000 --> 00:32:23.000
You know what I mean?
538
00:32:23.000 --> 00:32:27.000
And so you have to look beyond just like surface level quote unquote proof
539
00:32:27.000 --> 00:32:30.000
or surface level marketing or sales tactics
540
00:32:30.000 --> 00:32:34.000
and start to find the people who you feel call you forward
541
00:32:34.000 --> 00:32:38.000
in an aligned way who match who you say you want to be
542
00:32:38.000 --> 00:32:43.000
and have the kind of lifestyle relationships, family life,
543
00:32:43.000 --> 00:32:46.000
if you are if you have kids or husband or whatever,
544
00:32:46.000 --> 00:32:50.000
like find the people who match or aligned with who you want to believe
545
00:32:50.000 --> 00:32:53.000
or who you want to be or what you want to create do have an experience.
546
00:32:53.000 --> 00:32:56.000
Like who matches the kind of impact that you want to have?
547
00:32:56.000 --> 00:33:00.000
Who's style of coaching matches how you want to be held accountable
548
00:33:00.000 --> 00:33:05.000
or how you want to be activated or how you want to be supported in your business?
549
00:33:05.000 --> 00:33:06.000
Yeah.
550
00:33:06.000 --> 00:33:08.000
No, no, no more of this like cool girl shit.
551
00:33:08.000 --> 00:33:09.000
That stuff is so fucking over.
552
00:33:09.000 --> 00:33:11.000
It's like old world love.
553
00:33:11.000 --> 00:33:12.000
Yeah.
554
00:33:12.000 --> 00:33:13.000
And decision making.
555
00:33:13.000 --> 00:33:16.000
I saw something, I don't know, somebody was doing a trend.
556
00:33:16.000 --> 00:33:19.000
You know how Gary V's always like my predictions for 2026
557
00:33:19.000 --> 00:33:21.000
and like people doing that.
558
00:33:21.000 --> 00:33:26.000
And someone was like the lack of relatability is going to go out the window.
559
00:33:26.000 --> 00:33:30.000
So like we're not saying like if you love I was in a mentorship
560
00:33:30.000 --> 00:33:32.000
and it was really a cult.
561
00:33:32.000 --> 00:33:38.000
And the man was like private jets and cigars and flying private
562
00:33:38.000 --> 00:33:39.000
and all this.
563
00:33:39.000 --> 00:33:41.000
And like me and Hamish didn't know what we wanted because like you said
564
00:33:41.000 --> 00:33:45.000
we literally never sat down and thought about what do we value?
565
00:33:45.000 --> 00:33:46.000
Yes.
566
00:33:46.000 --> 00:33:47.000
Who are we?
567
00:33:47.000 --> 00:33:49.000
What do we want in the future?
568
00:33:49.000 --> 00:33:50.000
Is that important to us?
569
00:33:50.000 --> 00:33:51.000
Do we like that?
570
00:33:51.000 --> 00:33:52.000
Would we do that?
571
00:33:52.000 --> 00:33:54.000
And then he started treating people really weirdly.
572
00:33:54.000 --> 00:33:57.000
And it was always about like cigars and private flying.
573
00:33:57.000 --> 00:34:01.000
And then one day he did a session where he was like you know what do you spend the most time on?
574
00:34:01.000 --> 00:34:02.000
That's what you value.
575
00:34:02.000 --> 00:34:05.000
And we're in the session and we looked at each other like I'm always with you mother fucker.
576
00:34:05.000 --> 00:34:07.000
Like we're always hanging out together.
577
00:34:07.000 --> 00:34:08.000
Like I value you.
578
00:34:08.000 --> 00:34:09.000
He's like yeah me too.
579
00:34:09.000 --> 00:34:13.000
I'm like where the fuck is the private jet and the cigars like I don't give a fuck about that shit.
580
00:34:13.000 --> 00:34:18.000
And so his own session made us realize we actually do not value anything you value.
581
00:34:18.000 --> 00:34:20.000
We don't know why the fuck we're here.
582
00:34:20.000 --> 00:34:21.000
It was like an awakening moment.
583
00:34:21.000 --> 00:34:24.000
And from then we've always we every six months we really look at our values.
584
00:34:24.000 --> 00:34:29.000
And listeners you all know if you listen to the show like we talk about values we rewrite them.
585
00:34:29.000 --> 00:34:31.000
We redo them when a family gets sick like my mom was sick.
586
00:34:31.000 --> 00:34:32.000
We had to shift again.
587
00:34:32.000 --> 00:34:38.000
And I was like we value this but fuck right now my mom needs me and we're going to value looking after her and doing that.
588
00:34:38.000 --> 00:34:42.000
And so like I think if people are those of you that are listening.
589
00:34:42.000 --> 00:34:46.000
If you can get in touch with yourself like slow down.
590
00:34:46.000 --> 00:34:48.000
Take a break back away.
591
00:34:48.000 --> 00:34:49.000
Not your kids.
592
00:34:49.000 --> 00:34:50.000
Not your fucking clients.
593
00:34:50.000 --> 00:34:51.000
Not money.
594
00:34:51.000 --> 00:34:52.000
Not the grand.
595
00:34:52.000 --> 00:34:53.000
You right.
596
00:34:53.000 --> 00:34:57.000
Like spend them time with you to be like who the fuck am I?
597
00:34:57.000 --> 00:35:02.000
And maybe you can't hear your voice because maybe your family's voices in there or you know the city you grew up into.
598
00:35:02.000 --> 00:35:04.000
The religion your background your culture.
599
00:35:04.000 --> 00:35:07.000
And then it's like wait what the fuck do I want in some of us.
600
00:35:07.000 --> 00:35:12.000
Some women have not ever been able to ask themselves what they want or listen to that.
601
00:35:12.000 --> 00:35:18.000
And so I love that you shared that because from that place you will start to be in touch with you.
602
00:35:18.000 --> 00:35:23.000
And then you'll you'll have a radar like I know we have a radar like I just feel someone even on zoom.
603
00:35:23.000 --> 00:35:25.000
I'm like I feel like there's a barrier.
604
00:35:25.000 --> 00:35:26.000
I feel like they're off.
605
00:35:26.000 --> 00:35:27.000
I feel like.
606
00:35:27.000 --> 00:35:30.000
I don't know and it's I'm so grateful like I don't I wasn't always like that.
607
00:35:30.000 --> 00:35:34.000
So you can learn it but like now I'm like I can vibe and I'm like not.
608
00:35:34.000 --> 00:35:37.000
I'm like there's something not right and I can feel it.
609
00:35:37.000 --> 00:35:40.000
And then six months later they're like that person ended up doing this dirty shit.
610
00:35:40.000 --> 00:35:42.000
And I was like yep there it is.
611
00:35:42.000 --> 00:35:43.000
There it is.
612
00:35:43.000 --> 00:35:44.000
Like I knew it.
613
00:35:44.000 --> 00:35:47.000
You know you don't ever have to have like the logical reasoning behind it.
614
00:35:47.000 --> 00:35:49.000
You're like I don't know I just feel it.
615
00:35:49.000 --> 00:35:50.000
Yeah.
616
00:35:50.000 --> 00:35:51.000
Like I feel like something's off.
617
00:35:51.000 --> 00:35:52.000
I feel like I'm not meant to work with them.
618
00:35:52.000 --> 00:35:54.000
And that can be enough.
619
00:35:54.000 --> 00:35:55.000
Like that can be your reason.
620
00:35:55.000 --> 00:36:00.000
It's like I don't know why I just don't feel like I could open up to that person.
621
00:36:00.000 --> 00:36:01.000
Yeah.
622
00:36:01.000 --> 00:36:06.000
And I need to know and I love they said like cool girl slash mean girl like you also don't want.
623
00:36:06.000 --> 00:36:12.000
I don't want people listening to me to ever feel like I am better than them or they're not where I am.
624
00:36:12.000 --> 00:36:17.000
And therefore they need to like grovel at my feet or they need to make themselves.
625
00:36:17.000 --> 00:36:18.000
No.
626
00:36:18.000 --> 00:36:23.000
You know a certain level to then get access like I'll fucking send voice notes all damn on Instagram all the time.
627
00:36:23.000 --> 00:36:27.000
You're like you probably won't get this and I'm sure you'll never read this.
628
00:36:27.000 --> 00:36:31.000
And I'm like hi I'm fucking I'm voicing you I'm reading this like thank you for taking the time.
629
00:36:31.000 --> 00:36:33.000
They're like oh my god you responded I can't believe it.
630
00:36:33.000 --> 00:36:36.000
And I'm like I can't believe you listen to our podcasts.
631
00:36:36.000 --> 00:36:38.000
So if you're listening make sure you tag us.
632
00:36:38.000 --> 00:36:43.000
And then you shared it on your audience or you voiced me or you left a comment like I can't believe you did that.
633
00:36:43.000 --> 00:36:48.000
You don't fucking know me like that to me is like what a gift like I don't know.
634
00:36:48.000 --> 00:36:53.000
I feel like it says a lot about your your care and support for people how you treat your audience.
635
00:36:53.000 --> 00:36:54.000
How you treat your clients.
636
00:36:54.000 --> 00:37:11.000
You know how you create content like fuck the one thing we all have is our life our story the way we see things the experiences we've had like that's the only thing that's different like Jill you've done so much you've built so much I've never fucking built on Facebook with 55,000 people have no fucking idea.
637
00:37:11.000 --> 00:37:20.000
But you have your life experience and I have mine and if we were going to bring something to the table that's all we're going to bring we're going to bring our difference our opinions our experience the way we see the world.
638
00:37:20.000 --> 00:37:30.000
Our stories like how we grew up like the way we parent like that's all native to Jill and native to me and you have something native to you but if you won't fucking unpack it and show it.
639
00:37:30.000 --> 00:37:34.000
Then we're going to sound like everyone else like you said in the beginning it's so fucking important.
640
00:37:34.000 --> 00:37:51.000
Well and I think that often people don't do this work for themselves because it can be very emotional and I don't know people are scared to feel their emotions but if you can really allow yourself to remember it's just an emotion and I can move through it like it's not going to take me down.
641
00:37:51.000 --> 00:38:01.000
I feel like that is yet another level of your own energetic emotional liberation because you're no longer at the mercy of your fucking feelings.
642
00:38:01.000 --> 00:38:16.000
So many people wait for permission from their feelings to do the big shit that they want to do and it's like what if I just made that decision in service of alignment in service of courage in service of becoming who I keep saying I want to be.
643
00:38:16.000 --> 00:38:32.000
You moving into your next big era of like who you say you want to be that is not meant to be just like some easy breezy process like you have to forge who you are in service of becoming her.
644
00:38:32.000 --> 00:38:52.000
No telling the stories about yourself to yourself that are in support of your expansion yes good stories making making courageous moves before you feel ready for it before the space feels more predictable you know like I feel like a lot of people are like waiting for the space to be quote unquote predictable again release that.
645
00:38:52.000 --> 00:39:02.000
Who the fuck knows and that's going to happen just stop waiting for it to feel like it's gone back to normal it's not it's shifted that was a covid bubble.
646
00:39:02.000 --> 00:39:14.000
Yeah man like that 2020 to 2024 that was a small moment in time online and I feel like we're just watching the purge of people who didn't actually have staying power.
647
00:39:14.000 --> 00:39:30.000
And people are making that mean that oh my god maybe I'm not cut out for it no no no if you're still in the game if you're still taking swings if you're still making money you do have staying power all we're asking for for you is to have the courage to show yourself what you're made of.
648
00:39:30.000 --> 00:39:46.000
Have the courage to move through the hard challenging times because that's where you develop yourself that's where you forge your leadership that's where your identity elevates because you start releasing the things that no longer serve you in support of who you want to be hell yes.
649
00:39:46.000 --> 00:40:02.000
If you are already the version of you who was killing it you'd be there but you're not so that shows me you have stuff to do you have things to release things to forgive things to allow yourself to become moves you want to make decisions you need to make actions you need to take.
650
00:40:02.000 --> 00:40:10.000
If you aren't where you want to be then you're in the like river of misery is what I call it so where you are versus where you want to be.
651
00:40:10.000 --> 00:40:26.000
And in the middle of there is the river of misery where you have to develop your leadership you have to develop your courage you have to develop your grit in your determination your tenacity yeah you mean there are you have to become a different version of yourself if you want to create another level of success.
652
00:40:26.000 --> 00:40:28.000
Otherwise you'd already have it.
653
00:40:28.000 --> 00:40:33.000
Yeah fuck and we don't want to do that messy I just need to see if this air horn works.
654
00:40:33.000 --> 00:40:36.000
No didn't work god damn it.
655
00:40:36.000 --> 00:40:38.000
I really really want to play my air horn.
656
00:40:38.000 --> 00:40:40.000
I would have been so impressed by this.
657
00:40:40.000 --> 00:40:44.000
I feel like you need it on your phone and just put it into your microphone.
658
00:40:44.000 --> 00:40:46.000
Wait a second I feel like it can work.
659
00:40:47.000 --> 00:40:48.000
Did you hear that?
660
00:40:48.000 --> 00:40:52.000
Damn it insert it when I make really good points.
661
00:40:52.000 --> 00:41:01.000
It was on mute this whole time all these room clothes that I had that I wanted to do this fucking bitch with her stupid air horn muting.
662
00:41:01.000 --> 00:41:07.000
That was like my call to fame on clubhouse I was like I make air horn sounds.
663
00:41:07.000 --> 00:41:09.000
Love house oh my god.
664
00:41:10.000 --> 00:41:16.000
Oh my god the teens version of periscope or the 20s version of periscope.
665
00:41:16.000 --> 00:41:22.000
It was like a little my space moment as well like it was like where did that go it was so bad.
666
00:41:22.000 --> 00:41:23.000
Totally.
667
00:41:23.000 --> 00:41:31.000
So in the internet it's not going anywhere obviously the online space we talk a lot on this podcast about personal brand and about building your brand.
668
00:41:31.000 --> 00:41:43.000
And one of the core elements and I firmly believe people are happy to have a business but they don't want to step into personal brand because it's them and it's their opinions it's their face it's their rejection it's there.
669
00:41:43.000 --> 00:41:52.000
Literally you have to have an idea or a thought or opinion in your industry about what you speak about or else you just sound like everyone else right.
670
00:41:52.000 --> 00:42:00.000
And so it's I can't tell you how important it is what Jill just said of like you having your personal power understanding who you are.
671
00:42:00.000 --> 00:42:07.000
And doing your work and I remember when we had the sisterhood because I too close the program Jill that made a shitload of money and.
672
00:42:07.000 --> 00:42:18.000
Yes you did a lot of people unhappy and they were like who was lifetime access I'm like the lifetime of the fucking program the lifetime of the program is done baby like that's what lifetime access means it's done we're done.
673
00:42:18.000 --> 00:42:36.000
But in that space I really I really remember the core thing of why women didn't want to join or took so long to join is they were like I don't want to open up the past because I've already done that it's already over so I'd like to just sweep it under the rug and keep moving like it never happened.
674
00:42:36.000 --> 00:42:57.000
And if I go back there air quotes like they have a fucking time machine then I have to I'm going to be back there again can you talk to that because obviously that's impossible but maybe someone listening things to fuck Jill I don't want to go into my shit because it's going to mess me up again or it's going to slow me down or I'm going to be just how I was when I was depressed or in my shit.
675
00:42:57.000 --> 00:43:15.000
Yeah I I how do I want to say this one I understand that like I get that I understand people's trepidation and look I'm not trained in trauma blah blah blah anything like that so I don't want to pretend that I know what it's like to have.
676
00:43:15.000 --> 00:43:26.000
Deep or big levels of capital T trauma and you know how that might impact emotional states nervous systems mental state whatever.
677
00:43:27.000 --> 00:43:37.000
But I feel as though I went through my well Sydney you and I both work with Sydney and like way back in the day I was telling her about this experience that I had.
678
00:43:38.000 --> 00:43:55.000
For like 10 plus years where I was just like mercilessly bullied by just different chicks over 10 plus years like I had 30 chicks barricade me in my car like people would spray paint Jill Clark as a slut on the walls at school like think about the brick like that is some bold action.
679
00:43:56.000 --> 00:44:14.000
To actually spray paint on a school wall while gangsters yeah god yeah so okay so I remember telling Sydney this and I was like it's not that big of a deal like I'm past it and she was like that's traumatic and I was like is it like is it tell you.
680
00:44:14.000 --> 00:44:25.000
And I remember her being like that is capital T trauma and I was like nah no way capital T trauma is like I would say the stuff that you've been through is fucking.
681
00:44:26.000 --> 00:44:36.000
Bolded capital T trauma you know what I mean and it took me a minute to like even let it land that that was a form of trauma what I had been through.
682
00:44:36.000 --> 00:44:56.000
But there's not one part of me that wanted to shove it under the rug because it was actually deeply impacting how I was showing up yeah until I became aware of it I was acting out of those subconscious triggers which is not allowing myself to be too big because I might get attacked and I remember Josh drops such a genius line on me.
683
00:44:56.000 --> 00:45:01.000
When I can't remember what I was gearing up for but it was definitely in my JS brand so my third brand that I started.
684
00:45:02.000 --> 00:45:11.000
And like with him and I said you don't understand he was saying something like I don't know something around the power of being big and I was like you do not understand.
685
00:45:12.000 --> 00:45:20.000
When I am big I get attacked just like when I was in high school I'm blah blah and he's like I guarantee you the reason you got attacked is because you weren't big.
686
00:45:20.000 --> 00:45:34.000
And I was like blah like what you know like he was like because you didn't stand up for yourself because you weren't all of yourself that's why you got attacked because they thought you were weak and you played into it.
687
00:45:35.000 --> 00:45:47.000
And that if I was open to processing that if I wasn't open to seeing where those threads of whether you want to call it trauma or just wounding or whatever.
688
00:45:47.000 --> 00:45:57.000
If I wasn't open to processing that I would still be in my performative energy trying to be big instead of just being big.
689
00:45:58.000 --> 00:46:10.000
Because most people don't allow themselves to process what's gone on for them and so they act in more performative energy thinking that this is who they should be versus just allowing themselves to be big.
690
00:46:10.000 --> 00:46:14.000
I don't have to pretend to be big I am big.
691
00:46:15.000 --> 00:46:20.000
And so you don't have to pretend to be confident you can just be confident.
692
00:46:21.000 --> 00:46:26.000
You know what I mean you don't have to pretend to be on it look at me I'm going to go be audacious you can just be it.
693
00:46:27.000 --> 00:46:33.000
You know I mean it's simply a decision to embrace and own more of who you already are.
694
00:46:33.000 --> 00:46:39.000
If you desire those things if you want to be that that's because it's already inside you.
695
00:46:40.000 --> 00:46:42.000
You just have to turn the dial up on it.
696
00:46:42.000 --> 00:46:43.000
Yeah that's it.
697
00:46:43.000 --> 00:46:50.000
But most people like I was saying wait for permission from their feelings in order to feel like now's the right time and there will never be that moment.
698
00:46:51.000 --> 00:47:00.000
And so as you do this identity work your identity is simply just like the beliefs you hold the stories you believe to be true about yourself like how you see yourself.
699
00:47:00.000 --> 00:47:13.000
The things that you believe to be true about yourself the actions you take the kind of risks you take how you you know move through your world your values the things you prioritize like all the decisions you make the actions you take all of that that's your identity.
700
00:47:14.000 --> 00:47:21.000
And if you aren't where you want to be then you have to look at where you aren't showing up in service of who you say you want to be.
701
00:47:21.000 --> 00:47:33.000
And just allowing yourself to be that just turning up the dial on it getting on a new frequency that aligns with that so many people are trying to be magnetic that no.
702
00:47:34.000 --> 00:47:45.000
Yeah you just are magnetic or trying to be magnetic when you stop trying to be magnetic you are authentic when you stop trying to be authentic.
703
00:47:45.000 --> 00:48:00.000
Yeah because that's the energy of proving energy yes that's the energy of performance and that is a that is incongruent with the embodiment of it totally and like who do you have to prove it to if you believe it then you don't have to prove it.
704
00:48:01.000 --> 00:48:14.000
And there was a time where I was talking about like it's not confidence it's freedom because I do think because I talk about confidence queen of confidence people think oh you're so confident I'm like no over the years all that's happened in like when I met you and when you met me and it was like I just
705
00:48:15.000 --> 00:48:35.000
feel free like some days I am quiet you feel that way to be around it you know I feel free like and I feel I feel giving I feel abundant I feel I feel full so like everything about my energy falls over my cup and pours into people like I'm just like I feel like this self like a little fucking self generating
706
00:48:35.000 --> 00:48:46.000
and it drives the bunny like what like you know we can chill and then we can be like and then we can be in our fucking pajamas with no makeup on and I'm still going to be like hey good morning.
707
00:48:46.000 --> 00:48:51.000
Literally my favorite way to be you know it's like we were in the gold coast watching whales that was the best.
708
00:48:51.000 --> 00:48:56.000
Yeah that was such a good day that's like a core man it was such a good that was such a good one.
709
00:48:56.000 --> 00:49:04.000
We were in a condo and there were whales out of the window of Jill's room and we were like hold on are there is that fucking whale.
710
00:49:04.000 --> 00:49:05.000
We're like zooming in.
711
00:49:05.000 --> 00:49:14.000
But like Erica just imagine I feel like everyone who listens to you probably imagines the octave at which she was screaming.
712
00:49:14.000 --> 00:49:19.000
It was like so it was like fucking dolphins could hear it that's how high it was.
713
00:49:19.000 --> 00:49:24.000
We're communicating with the whales across the street feel like come over guys.
714
00:49:24.000 --> 00:49:44.000
But yeah it's like it's freedom and you know when you are I love what you said Jill because when you are who you are in the moment who you are in the moment who you feel like today tomorrow you might feel like this and today you feel like this and the next day you feel how you feel when you can be that there's this like loosening of your hands.
715
00:49:44.000 --> 00:50:09.000
And the tightening and the has to be like this rigid this like rigidness goes down and it like it's so nice to be around and then people feel like I want to come over I want to talk to you it's warm it's like hey what's up it's not try hard it's not I'm so cool and look I used to fucking like I saw it as like a filter during COVID I wore eye contacts blue eye contacts because I love them.
716
00:50:09.000 --> 00:50:38.000
Yeah I had a crazy friend who always wore crazy contacts like tats on her face she definitely inspired my fashion sense that's for sure because I was always like I can't wear that then I was like fuck it I want to wear blue contacts and obviously they weren't my eyes you can see they were blue contacts but I wore them and then I would have these filters that I would wear and like I remember looking in the mirror during COVID being like oh where's the bitch from Instagram this is not her and I was like whoa it distorted me so much I like took my contacts off I decided not to do I still do a Harris filter hello.
717
00:50:38.000 --> 00:51:07.000
Hello, but I was like it was my own we're in our 40s for fucks. We got a little bit of something something but like no shade do you fucking whatever filters y'all got to do get your ass on the gram use the filters okay enjoy your life but for me you have a filter yeah but for me I was like oh I was feeling like it was giving me an inauthentic something and I was just like whoa I don't like this what is this and it was so funny because I started to show up and then I was like I'm not going to do this.
718
00:51:08.000 --> 00:51:23.000
But see people talk shit about people wearing filters and then I would kind of be like no no no hold on like we're saying be authentic be who you are but like if it takes you putting on a filter because that's what you need to do to show up on Instagram and share your business and talk about your perspective
719
00:51:23.000 --> 00:51:37.000
and do your thing like fucking do that like we're not making you know like do what you need to do to get yourself out there but like be free like the more free the less weight and shit that can be on your shoulders
720
00:51:37.000 --> 00:51:57.000
the less expectation the less you should the less you should be this and this is how to do it it's like actually this is what's going to cut through on the internet don't fucking be like everyone else literally everything everyone else is doing fucking do the opposite and don't do that shit like it's like sovereignty
721
00:51:57.000 --> 00:52:19.000
because I fucking want to because I want to be like that can be because it why are you doing that because it no longer matches who I want to be so I'm stopping it why are you doing that because I fucking want to why are you starting that because I feel called to why are you closing that because it's no longer lined with how I want to grow or how I want to run my business because I fucking want to why I'm
722
00:52:19.000 --> 00:52:36.000
because I'm making this choice for me you don't have to like it I love it 100% it can be as simple as that I feel like so many I know that I did this so I can only speak for myself I outsourced the direction of so many things in my life to other people who I thought
723
00:52:36.000 --> 00:52:54.000
quote unquote new better or were smarter than me me thinking I wasn't smart has been a belief that I uncovered probably in the last like three years very new bro I'm 44 okay so I probably uncovered this for myself like maybe when I was 40 now
724
00:52:54.500 --> 00:53:23.920
because of that this blood into so many areas of my life like oh my god if I could even just like I I had a TV show offer denied it because I was like no way I'm not smart enough for that I got a book offer denied that this was 2016 because I'm not smart enough so many things like I didn't start coaching on my own for I had screw the nine to five from 2013 up until 2020 and I
725
00:53:23.920 --> 00:53:33.920
never taught a single thing on my own seven years of never doing anything on my own because I literally said on our old podcast in coaching calls
726
00:53:33.920 --> 00:53:47.920
Josh is the smart one I'm the entertainment I literally it's fucking embarrassing to even say that because I would say that publicly to my clients of Josh is a smart one I remember this is 2021
727
00:53:47.920 --> 00:53:55.920
and Amy Portafield hired our team for like our paid bootcamp kind of stuff and Josh was working with her team and she said where's Jill
728
00:53:55.920 --> 00:54:04.920
and her chick who was managing this at the time was like oh it's we just work with Josh and she said to me I was so surprised that you weren't involved in that
729
00:54:04.920 --> 00:54:12.920
and I was like no but he's a smart one like he's who you want to work with and she's like like what like no I want to work with you
730
00:54:12.920 --> 00:54:20.920
you know I mean so it's been so many like how big I've allowed myself to be how opinionated I've allowed I've allowed myself to be
731
00:54:20.920 --> 00:54:31.920
the programs I've allowed myself to coach on or sell the opportunities I've won after the asks I've made all of that was marred by me believing I wasn't smart
732
00:54:31.920 --> 00:54:39.920
and so because of that I did not take the risks or make the moves or take the actions that would be an alignment with someone who believed they were smart
733
00:54:39.920 --> 00:54:47.920
and so you have to be able to or you have to be open to examining where you might be outsourcing your own inner knowing
734
00:54:47.920 --> 00:54:56.920
or your skills or your own brilliance because you think that other people have a better answer or a better skill set or a better equipped than you are
735
00:54:56.920 --> 00:55:02.920
but the ones who truly want to hear from you they want to hear your perspective they want to hear your take on things
736
00:55:02.920 --> 00:55:11.920
they want to listen to your content they want you not what you think this guy thinks is smart or what this chick says is acceptable
737
00:55:11.920 --> 00:55:19.920
they want you and your take in your heart and your beliefs and your values and your voice and your audacity to fucking play full out and go for it
738
00:55:19.920 --> 00:55:27.920
so that is just like a huge revelation I've had for myself in the last few years is like even how I built last year
739
00:55:27.920 --> 00:55:35.920
I mean I'm so grateful to Josh and everything we built together of course we had an amazing adventure together for 16 plus years
740
00:55:35.920 --> 00:55:43.920
you know what I mean we've built we've built movements together we've lived in 13 countries together we've done amazing things together
741
00:55:43.920 --> 00:55:52.920
and also I realized even with my JS brand last year I outsourced the direction of that because I wanted to coach on identity and personal power
742
00:55:52.920 --> 00:56:01.920
and Josh he now realizes like I really should have said that but and I know he would be fine with me sharing this but he said to me people will never buy that
743
00:56:01.920 --> 00:56:11.920
that stuff does not sell online and I believe that I was like well Josh is really smart and he's very logical and he's very structured so yeah I should go back to teaching strategy
744
00:56:11.920 --> 00:56:21.920
because that is what people want and it worked for a few months until all of a sudden I was like I fucking hate this
745
00:56:21.920 --> 00:56:29.920
and I am not at my highest of caliber as a coach when I am teaching on shit that I really don't care about
746
00:56:29.920 --> 00:56:38.920
like I can help you with it I can help you move the needle but is it where I am like I am truly in my zone of genius absolutely not
747
00:56:38.920 --> 00:56:45.920
but when I coach on identity and personal power when I am in mentorship with someone who is like hi I love your style
748
00:56:45.920 --> 00:56:53.920
and I want you to gel at me for anyone listening Erica knows what this is but Jelling is Jill yelling and it's what my clients call it
749
00:56:53.920 --> 00:57:01.920
and it's essentially like loving kicks in the pants and service of your highest a lot but I'm very direct you know like I'm very direct
750
00:57:01.920 --> 00:57:09.920
and I'm very noble shit in how I support people and so I am a lethal weapon to the people who are open to that
751
00:57:09.920 --> 00:57:17.920
the ones who are like yes I want to kick in the pants yes please gel at me I am a lethal weapon for those people because I am in my zone of genius
752
00:57:17.920 --> 00:57:22.920
I love it but that's only because I gave myself the permission to believe I am already fucking smart
753
00:57:22.920 --> 00:57:28.920
yes and I am already brilliant and I can trust my instincts to build what I want to fucking build you want to fucking build
754
00:57:28.920 --> 00:57:34.920
not what somebody else wants you to build for anyone listening to this Jill's Jelling when I first met Jill I was like oh my God
755
00:57:34.920 --> 00:57:38.920
so the podcast this they were like you should name the podcast the loving bitch slap
756
00:57:38.920 --> 00:57:43.920
and I didn't call that because I wouldn't say I'm an lovingly bitch slap you I mean although I feel like I would say that
757
00:57:43.920 --> 00:57:48.920
but I never said that and we were like loving bitch slap so Jill's Jelling is the loving bitch slap
758
00:57:48.920 --> 00:57:53.920
and yes sister over here hello didn't want to do anything because I was like I'm a stupid Spanish girl I'm not smart enough
759
00:57:53.920 --> 00:58:01.920
and I have to say when I did the Ted talk I feel like that the massive skin shed on the on the fucking stage
760
00:58:01.920 --> 00:58:06.920
but that's still like the little bit is still there when something I can't work it out I'm like
761
00:58:06.920 --> 00:58:11.920
if I were smart in my head I'm like if I were smart I could work it out and it's like you are smart
762
00:58:11.920 --> 00:58:17.920
you just can't work it out but you'll figure it out like how stupid it still comes so like I love that you know
763
00:58:17.920 --> 00:58:24.920
the belief that the story you were telling yourself the belief that you had which then formed the identity as to how you saw yourself
764
00:58:24.920 --> 00:58:29.920
which then forms how you feel how you show up what you build what you create how much money you make who you marry
765
00:58:29.920 --> 00:58:35.920
where you live what your friends I fucking shapes everything everything the content you put out there
766
00:58:35.920 --> 00:58:40.920
how you support people how you sell your sales conversations your messaging your positioning all of it
767
00:58:40.920 --> 00:58:47.920
your price points your boundaries your standards who you choose to spend your life with like literally who you allow in your energy
768
00:58:47.920 --> 00:58:53.920
it is all informed by who you believe yourself to be so let's and this is so moldable
769
00:58:53.920 --> 00:58:59.920
I know this is why it's like you can take control of this I want to say to you because people don't talk about this
770
00:58:59.920 --> 00:59:07.920
and we don't have to go super deep but support wise what have you done what do you do continuously or have you done
771
00:59:07.920 --> 00:59:15.920
to heal work on process emotionally like I know because you fucking tell me and you're deep in the hole doing your shit
772
00:59:15.920 --> 00:59:22.920
but just as someone's listening like what do you guys mean what do you do like what does it look like to constantly work on your identity
773
00:59:22.920 --> 00:59:28.920
and excavate the shit that doesn't serve you deal with it process it like what does it look like for you
774
00:59:28.920 --> 00:59:40.920
so I am I am a huge syncutator now I struggle to meditate do you know like are you a good meditator Erica because I feel like your brain would be like that
775
00:59:40.920 --> 00:59:47.920
when I could but I don't like to I'm a moving meditation girl like little god or walking or
776
00:59:47.920 --> 00:59:55.920
okay same but okay so I call that syncutating it's like I am processing shit in my head you know what I mean
777
00:59:55.920 --> 01:00:01.920
and so I am constantly so I've worked with mentors obviously I obviously work with Sydney who you also work with
778
01:00:01.920 --> 01:00:10.920
literally the savior of my life and so many she said so many gems to me I remember the first time she said to me
779
01:00:10.920 --> 01:00:22.920
it must be hard being this insecure and I was like I'm not insecure and she's like yes you are and I was like no I'm not
780
01:00:22.920 --> 01:00:32.920
and she was like yes you are and I was like like I couldn't even see it again I was in the fucking
781
01:00:32.920 --> 01:00:40.920
performative energy I hadn't stripped away the belief of like I can be all of myself and actually that's the best fucking
782
01:00:40.920 --> 01:00:48.920
thing I could do so where am I not doing that and so one of my biggest ones was constantly overriding my
783
01:00:48.920 --> 01:00:56.920
needs for well pretty much anyone in my life but concretely Josh for sure yeah so and I've
784
01:00:56.920 --> 01:01:04.920
talked about this on my own podcast like us in our like in our divorce and completion of our marriage like this was a
785
01:01:04.920 --> 01:01:12.920
multi-year conversation for us yeah and so on that journey I realized how much I negated my own needs in
786
01:01:12.920 --> 01:01:18.920
service of making sure he was happy he was good he wasn't stressed he wasn't you know feeling feelings whatever
787
01:01:18.920 --> 01:01:26.920
right and I abandoned myself so many times due to that so Sydney was fantastic at highlighting a lot of shadows
788
01:01:26.920 --> 01:01:32.920
for me that I couldn't see and now that I'm aware of a lot of that and I have the tools to do a lot of
789
01:01:32.920 --> 01:01:42.920
self reflection I heavily prioritize that I also so I think it ate a lot I work with Sydney I obviously
790
01:01:42.920 --> 01:01:48.920
have girlfriends who are deeply growth-minded and self-aware and emotionally intelligent and I process like a
791
01:01:48.920 --> 01:01:54.920
motherfucker with them so you my friend Heather my friend Jade those are my three go-tos where everyone is
792
01:01:54.920 --> 01:02:03.920
like so in tune on different areas of like self-improvement and so I rely on my friends heavily I think it
793
01:02:03.920 --> 01:02:13.920
I work with Sydney I um breath work I'm starting to start yes I do a lot of breath work I do a lot of breath work so I work out
794
01:02:13.920 --> 01:02:19.920
quite a bit yeah and I recently joined a thing called shadow world that's by this what's her name
795
01:02:19.920 --> 01:02:27.920
Felicity shit what's her last name Bach anyways her app is called shadow world and
796
01:02:27.920 --> 01:02:35.920
that has opened my eyes just so many just like little threads of like darkness yeah or shadows where I was like holy
797
01:02:35.920 --> 01:02:41.920
shit I did not even see that one and so I love bringing this stuff to light for myself and you you
798
01:02:41.920 --> 01:02:47.920
you ask away a lot I'm a big believer in that I'm a big believer in that so I think it's important not a lot of people are comfortable
799
01:02:47.920 --> 01:02:53.920
with that I know but like it's important that you and and for Sydney's a therapist like and Jill told me about her
800
01:02:53.920 --> 01:02:58.920
because can you imagine those that know and listen to the podcast me getting a therapist I'm like they be inspired by me I'm like I don't
801
01:02:58.920 --> 01:03:04.920
want you to be inspired by me like you have to kick my ass and I'm like I need to find a therapist who I can respect no offense
802
01:03:04.920 --> 01:03:10.920
and who is good and who and it's hard when you are savvy and you do your work and like I'm studying
803
01:03:10.920 --> 01:03:16.920
and I've had a lot of fucked up shit and I've had a lot of therapist and you know like I you've got your finger on the pulse
804
01:03:16.920 --> 01:03:22.920
Jill and I've got my finger on the pulse and I have my finger on everyone else's fucking pulse so like if you work with me
805
01:03:22.920 --> 01:03:26.920
and you're shit in on the pulse I know about it and then you're going to know about it and it's fucking stressful
806
01:03:26.920 --> 01:03:34.920
so like I was really weary and until you said that she said that to you and I was like okay and so my one when I met with her the
807
01:03:34.920 --> 01:03:40.920
first time was like you're very you have a lot of frantic energy and I was like I'm a frantic what the fuck are you talking about
808
01:03:40.920 --> 01:03:47.920
I have frantic energy she's like no you have you have frantic energy all of that like frantic and I was like I'm not
809
01:03:47.920 --> 01:03:57.920
you're like it's fine it's fine frantic like what like I'm frantic what since fucking when am I frantic and then I was like I'm fucking
810
01:03:57.920 --> 01:04:04.920
frantic and then I could not see it I was like holy shit so just in case you're like what kind of work is this it's like having a therapist
811
01:04:04.920 --> 01:04:10.920
call you out on shit that you are deeply uncomfortable being called out about you know journaling breath work
812
01:04:10.920 --> 01:04:18.920
if you're into fucking shamanic energy healing or raky or counseling or couples work like whatever it is
813
01:04:18.920 --> 01:04:23.920
it's you not living in your own head by yourself thinking you're going to figure it out because no offense if you don't have the
814
01:04:23.920 --> 01:04:29.920
tools or the mentorship or somebody seeing inside your fish bowl you're not going to see you think you can pull your
815
01:04:29.920 --> 01:04:34.920
little eyeballs outside and you're going to not miss anything you miss so much and we're supposed to and as humans
816
01:04:34.920 --> 01:04:39.920
we're supposed to ask for help and support and we spend money on fucking Netflix on our nails on fucking lashes
817
01:04:39.920 --> 01:04:46.920
on Botox on bullshit it's like spend some fucking money on unpacking the reason why you believe negative shit about
818
01:04:46.920 --> 01:04:51.920
yourself and doing actions you're not happy with so that you can have a better fucking life and get better results
819
01:04:51.920 --> 01:04:58.920
and it's excruciating amen to that and painful it's excruciating and it's worth it hell yeah like I honestly think
820
01:04:58.920 --> 01:05:06.920
this chick who has the shadow world app I mean she's on to something because she's been doing this stuff for I
821
01:05:06.920 --> 01:05:11.920
don't know how long couple years I think she was in business coaching before that and just even some of
822
01:05:11.920 --> 01:05:18.920
the things that she highlights like I watched one of her videos in that app or wherever it was and she was
823
01:05:18.920 --> 01:05:24.920
talking about how a lot of people say oh I have a fear of success and how that's actually a shadow
824
01:05:24.920 --> 01:05:30.920
it's like you don't really have a fear of success like if it were to drop into your lap and you were cool
825
01:05:30.920 --> 01:05:36.920
with it then you'd be like sweet that was really easy but why people say they have a fear of success
826
01:05:36.920 --> 01:05:45.920
is actually like a shadow wound of wanting sympathy and I was just like damn like I didn't even see
827
01:05:45.920 --> 01:05:50.920
that one because if you say you have a fear of success then people don't expect a lot of you
828
01:05:50.920 --> 01:05:58.920
there you get sympathy oh I know I have that too or it's okay give yourself a break yeah you deserve it
829
01:05:58.920 --> 01:06:04.920
yeah you know what I mean you get acknowledgement and validation which keeps you right where you are in
830
01:06:04.920 --> 01:06:10.920
your quote unquote fear of success which is really just repelling everything you say you fucking want
831
01:06:10.920 --> 01:06:16.920
and the therapy hat I would say maybe your mom didn't see you your dad didn't validate you no one was like
832
01:06:16.920 --> 01:06:21.920
hey good job you're doing a great job so then the little inner you needs to like mother
833
01:06:21.920 --> 01:06:26.920
yourself or baby yourself or be like good job honey good and yes good job and we should we shouldn't
834
01:06:26.920 --> 01:06:32.920
be fucking rough to ourselves but if we don't even realize that somebody in my life growing up never saw me
835
01:06:32.920 --> 01:06:38.920
so now I want to prove myself or I wasn't safe for me to be seen so I have a visibility fucking wound
836
01:06:38.920 --> 01:06:42.920
but I really deeply desire you to see me but then when you look at me I'm like do look at me it's like
837
01:06:42.920 --> 01:06:48.920
that's fucking that's your shit like that's shit to do with and like I don't have any trauma yes who cares if you don't
838
01:06:48.920 --> 01:06:54.920
have trauma some fucked up shit happened in your childhood and it a hundred million percent affects your adulthood
839
01:06:54.920 --> 01:07:02.920
like 100% that's fucking wild we'll have to link that lady's thing in the if we can find a link it in the description below
840
01:07:02.920 --> 01:07:08.920
I'll look for her IG as well yes I'm okay I am Felicity something Felicity we love you Felicity
841
01:07:08.920 --> 01:07:14.920
we love the shadow she's America excuse me she's Australian too okay okay my Aussie friend and she's a
842
01:07:14.920 --> 01:07:18.920
manifesto so she's like a sister from another mister you got to get around your podcast yeah and she
843
01:07:18.920 --> 01:07:24.920
must be in any of her mate this chick is like she's our crew you think we have strong delivery bro
844
01:07:24.920 --> 01:07:32.920
like this chick has very strong delivery she was like zero fucks in some of the stuff she says I love her
845
01:07:33.160 --> 01:07:37.960
so Jill has a podcast and you have so much coming up and going on and people are gonna be
846
01:07:37.960 --> 01:07:42.600
addicted like I was when I met you and being like oh my god I need some jelling in my life so
847
01:07:43.400 --> 01:07:48.360
tell us about the podcast and maybe what you got going on that people can check out how where can we
848
01:07:48.360 --> 01:07:53.320
find you where can they connect with you all the things yeah the easiest way to connect with me is
849
01:07:53.320 --> 01:07:58.760
on Instagram so I am Jill Stanton is my handle and then my podcast is rich hot and free because
850
01:07:58.760 --> 01:08:04.440
that's the way so you can just go to JillStanton.com forward slash podcast it'll link all the players
851
01:08:05.160 --> 01:08:11.160
and then where I'm going I actually this is a beautiful like way to kind of tie this all in so
852
01:08:12.120 --> 01:08:19.640
for so long I thought I had to teach in my coaching brand and like I would teach sessions I would
853
01:08:19.640 --> 01:08:25.240
teach uh three-day workshops secret weapon I have one coming up called resurrected like
854
01:08:25.240 --> 01:08:31.160
teaching her first million teaching um what are some of the other ones like I taught power I taught
855
01:08:31.160 --> 01:08:35.720
like all these different things right and they were live sessions where I'm teaching something
856
01:08:35.720 --> 01:08:42.840
and recently I had such a massive realization wait a second I fucking hate teaching
857
01:08:43.640 --> 01:08:52.120
I hate teaching I love coaching yes I love coaching I love being able to listen to what you're
858
01:08:52.120 --> 01:08:57.400
bringing to me and being able to just like activate because even just not to be super will but like
859
01:08:58.120 --> 01:09:01.880
the things I'm gonna list off are gonna sound so ridiculous because it's literally all the
860
01:09:01.880 --> 01:09:07.160
personality tests but like I'm a quad right splinic one-four manifestor which means I pierce
861
01:09:07.160 --> 01:09:13.160
straight through the bullshit I'm an anyogram eight and I'm a life path numerology seven which is
862
01:09:13.160 --> 01:09:19.320
the true seeker or the truth teller and the seeker so I pierce straight through the shit that you
863
01:09:19.320 --> 01:09:26.120
are not saying I hear and I bring that out to you so that we can yeah remove the stuff that no longer
864
01:09:26.120 --> 01:09:31.960
serves you in service of going into your next level of growth power and success so that was a massive
865
01:09:31.960 --> 01:09:37.160
realization for me and the second I realized that I was like I'm switching everything yeah and so
866
01:09:37.160 --> 01:09:43.480
I am prioritizing all coaching offers I'm not gonna teach it and so I have a thing called that
867
01:09:43.480 --> 01:09:48.200
coming up called savage which is I was thinking of myself like as I was getting all this new clarity
868
01:09:48.200 --> 01:09:53.400
I was like well if I could only ever win like what is my favorite style of coaching and I love
869
01:09:53.960 --> 01:09:58.680
voice text coaching I love being able to just like dish out a kick in the pants yeah and then like
870
01:09:58.680 --> 01:10:04.200
send yeah and so I was like I'm gonna create an entire container around that where people ask me
871
01:10:05.000 --> 01:10:08.600
whatever it is that they're struggling with or whatever they need a kick in the pants around or
872
01:10:08.600 --> 01:10:13.640
a higher perspective around or a new way of seeing things and I'm going to fucking gel at people
873
01:10:13.640 --> 01:10:19.800
just through voice they write their their fucking question to me and I will gel at them and that
874
01:10:19.800 --> 01:10:24.280
is my whole offer and I'm so excited for it it feels like the truest thing I've ever fucking built
875
01:10:24.280 --> 01:10:29.400
for myself and then on the front of that now that I have all this clarity which is like really
876
01:10:29.400 --> 01:10:35.960
truly allowing myself to prioritize my own wisdom and my own guidance and my own fucking knowing
877
01:10:35.960 --> 01:10:42.600
for myself and my brand versus what someone says that you should have this fucking yeah passive
878
01:10:42.600 --> 01:10:49.320
this and that I'm like it I love that for you guys yeah I want to I want to know you I want to
879
01:10:49.320 --> 01:10:53.480
work with you I want to activate I want to talk to you I want to coach I want to like get to the
880
01:10:53.480 --> 01:10:58.600
bottom of shit oh yeah and so once I realize that I was like okay so how do I sell savage if like
881
01:10:58.600 --> 01:11:03.560
if no one understands what jelly is because they're new to my world well how can I give them a taste
882
01:11:03.560 --> 01:11:07.240
of that and so then I realize like I'm gonna create something called I don't know I'm still trying
883
01:11:07.240 --> 01:11:11.960
to work on the name but maybe it's called on the verge or catalyst or something like that and it is
884
01:11:11.960 --> 01:11:17.960
like hot seats essentially and I'm just gonna coach for people who are new to new to my world
885
01:11:17.960 --> 01:11:23.720
and I'm just gonna that works as well because people activate there's a guy named Giovanni that I met
886
01:11:23.720 --> 01:11:28.520
through Taki's program once and he would like email his list and only have and we did it for a
887
01:11:28.520 --> 01:11:32.360
little while and it was so good like 20 spots I'm gonna coach you live just come to the
888
01:11:32.360 --> 01:11:35.880
couple 20 people only and then at the end it's like if you loved it and you want to keep going
889
01:11:35.880 --> 01:11:40.760
cool and if not you're welcome thank you for being here next and it was such a great I love that
890
01:11:40.760 --> 01:11:46.200
I think that that is okay so Jill we're gonna put all your things into the link in the show notes
891
01:11:46.200 --> 01:11:50.760
and we 100 million percent would love for you if you're listening to this episode if you got
892
01:11:50.760 --> 01:11:56.040
anything from this today like screenshot share it tag us on Instagram comment below if you're
893
01:11:56.040 --> 01:12:00.440
watching on YouTube or comment if you're on Spotify any of the places I wish Apple let you comment
894
01:12:00.440 --> 01:12:05.960
I'm sorry Apple level up do you better innovate goddamn it Tim Cook but I know come on man
895
01:12:05.960 --> 01:12:12.120
what are you doing making a new fucking iphone read the room um we want connection and community um
896
01:12:12.120 --> 01:12:18.760
I love you so much and I cannot love you so much when the fuck is I gonna be I'm literally
897
01:12:18.760 --> 01:12:22.760
just gonna come to us joy it's getting to that point literally yeah we got this right here the pink
898
01:12:22.760 --> 01:12:30.600
room this is Tukasa yeah that's where I'm gonna stay just like hey guys um let me in the pink room
899
01:12:30.600 --> 01:12:36.200
may this episode be some jelling fire in your ass some loving bitch lap oh you two
900
01:12:37.240 --> 01:12:43.000
fire in your butt cheeks only fire allowed um for you to come back into yourself and into your
901
01:12:43.000 --> 01:12:47.000
alignment Jill I love you thank you so much for being here I love you so much thanks for having me
902
01:12:48.600 --> 01:12:49.560
oh yeah go