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It's Talk Funny, a podcast by
Mark Bailey and other comics from all over.
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We ended up in Japan because in
space, no one can hear you
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speak Japanese, but in Japan,
no one gives you space. The Talk
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Funny podcast from Nagoya Radio dot Com
and Nigoia Comedy. Here's Mark Bailey,
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Mark Bailey and Steve Howard on Talk
Funny. We're just talking about the doing
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comedy on stage, talking about our
lovely wives. It's much cheaper than therapy
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because therapy is just having the same
arguments, but now in public and you
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have at home, and you're paying
one hundred dollars and an hour. So
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we're going to talk about some meta
comic issues. We talked about comic voices.
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Do that okay? So in John
Voorhouse's book he does talk about comic
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voice, and it's very important.
It's like who are you? Are you
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the angry comic? And I knew
Steve at the first. At first he
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wasn't angry comic, but it's Mary. So now we're all angry comics.
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But I'm an angry comic and I
do the angry comic thing. But you
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can also do the two. There's
the duieb vantage point. What's your vantage
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point? So one thing Steve Martin
taught me is there's two kinds of vantage
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points for comedy, especially for movies. If you watch comedy movies or any
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movie, you realize there's the same
guy in an insane world or the insane
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guy in the same world. Jim
Carrey is always the insane guy in the
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same world. Bruce Willis is the
same guy in an insane world. Robin
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Williams has done both. But commas
also do that. So Emo Phillips,
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he's a dewey be comic, and
those are more suited for one liners.
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Stephen Wright has this crazy phizzy hair
and does one liners. But if you're
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in a suit and tie and you
do one liners, it's kind of weird
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because you look like Bob Hope and
they expect Bob Hope how he does stories.
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So your vantage point is are you
the crazy comic and everyone's reacting to
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you, which is probably what I
do. By the end, I've had
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fans ask me later and they're like, you know, I really when you
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specified in, I really thust you. I thought you had lost your mind.
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They said, well, I succeeded
that's what I wanted to do to
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think, But did you I said, dunt, dun, dum. You
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don't know. That's what I want
you to think. I've lost it that
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I actually had a set that I
was gonna do, but I got on
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a tangent about the wife and it
ended up smashing a strata various that I
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have to turn into the Nagoya Museum
of Music, which doesn't exist, which
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I made up, which I pre
smashed the violin, and I almost went
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to jail for it because they thought
I was destroying I mean, Germany's people
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were coming up to me like,
how are you going to take this back
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to the museum? You don't get
comedy. They're like, I thought you
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lost your mind. Well that's what
I wanted. When Mark takes a knee,
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it means he's not being serious,
So that's what I wanted. But
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other people want to be the Jerry
Seinfeld is perfect simple. What's with what's
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with the tickets? What's with ticket
McNuggets, what's with Halloween? He's saying,
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everybody else is crazy? And I
prefer Sam Kinnison's. I prefer the
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Bob Gothwaits. I prefer them.
They're insane and you don't know if they
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are insane. You really don't know. That's entertaining for me, and I
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identify with that. How about you, Well, I actually I was gonna
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ask you a question because I'm a
comedian that kind of feels like he recently
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found his voice. So when did
you feel like you found your voice?
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So I had two different voices when
I started in the eighties, I was
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a smart ass, young, thin, unmarried kid. And in the eighties
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we were doing more ethnic jokes because
it was New York. So I would
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do a joke about I think people
have you know, used this since then,
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but I did it first in the
eighties. I'll say the farmer's market.
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I'm not saying there's a lot of
Asians there, but I dropped to
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my keys and for Vietnamese guys came
running punk punk time, Right, you
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can do those jokes then, And
I told I'd say, you know,
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I'm not saying there's a lot of
gay people in my neighborhood, but they're
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having a meeting next week. It's
at Madison Square Garden. So it was
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just kind of ironic. More signed, more jewey. Yeah, they can't
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cancel you for saying juey yeah,
and more puns. Larry Miller, I
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played with him a lot, so
we both did a lot of puns.
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Kind of Bob Sagot is okay.
So Bob Saget would say he would do
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the award show, he said,
these are the nominees and then touch his
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knees to go these are my knees, and he'd say something like my girlfriend,
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she's four feet tall and nuts over
her. It's just a lot of
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puns. So puns were a lot
more welcome in the eighties when I was
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a radio until twenty ten, and
I started to get darker and darker,
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darker because I was married, and
then my kids got older, and as
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we've talked of Mike, the kids
they used to think I was daddy can
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do everything, So Daddy's useless when
they get to be thirteen, and even
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my joke's on radio got darker and
darker. It's like that was a song
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called suicide. But I can dream, can I? And I just do
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this and throw these off. So
by the time I went back, I
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did comedy here first in the Boy
in Osaka back in ninety three. In
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ninety five. By now I'm married, it got really dark. Okay,
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so my comic voice then became the
angry comic. So my voice changed because
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you have a mortgage, you have
kids that hate you, You have a
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lot of problems. I didn't have
any problems in the ages. I was
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a smartass. Yeah, you idiots
to get married and you get divorced and
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you hate your life. You guys
are schmucks. WHOA, let's let's put
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you in a time machine. This
is your life. You're gonna make jokes
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about wife and the onions thirty years. So that's how my voice changed about
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you. Well, as I said, I feel like I've just recently maybe
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found my voice. But one thing
the show we did a few shows ago,
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and that one when I was on
stage and I didn't even notice it,
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but timid show is this it was? It was in uh it was
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a coat of Arms in July with
Evans. Okay, okay, yah,
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But one thing, like I didn't
even notice it, but Tim Lyin came
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up to me after my set and
he said, he said that was weird
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because you were like walking around on
stage. He said, you never do
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that usually, just stand there like
stiff as a board, hunched over and
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he said you looked really really comfortable, And I said, yeah, I
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just I felt like everything was really
flowing and I could kind of, you
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know, connect with the audience a
little bit, and it was it really
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felt great. So that's why I
feel like maybe I've kind of found my
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voice now. Yeah, when you
feel if you don't own a car,
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I can't make jokes about driving,
you have to talk about your wife or
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whatever you're living. And gord Vidal
one of my favorite quotes from him,
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he said, you're actually in a
prison. The artist is in a prison,
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but he doesn't know he's in a
prison. He thinks everybody's in a
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prison. So when he looks out
the window and describes things from his prison,
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which his vantage point in comedy speak, other people think it's funny because
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they're not in a prison. They
realize he's in a prison. Yeah,
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but he doesn't realize that. And
he said, that's art, that's comedy,
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that's movies, that's writing, that's
poetry, that's music. Like you
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know, so when I get up
and talk about how horrible my life is
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with being married, and people are
like, but I'm married and I'm happy,
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I don't understand what's the matter.
With this guy. Oh, he's
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in a prison of his own mind. But that's where your art comes from.
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Your art comes from the tension of
trying to shout from the prison and
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telling people, no, you're like
me, No we're not, We're not.
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That's what's funny. And so in
the eighties, I didn't have any
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problem. I was making two hundred
thousand dollars a year. I had a
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great radio job. I had a
great speech wrinning job. I was getting
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laid. I had no problems.
How can I be funny? I don't
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have any tapes, but Logan had
a tape and he sent me one and
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I lost it. I had no
tension. Imagine if Sam Kinison was happily
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married, how entertaining would that be. Imagine if Lenny Bruce had no problems
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with the law. Yeah, it
reminds me of what Hemingway said, writing
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is easy. All you do is
sit down and cut yourself and belied or
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something like that. Yeah. So
I really like that Gore Vidal quote,
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which is that Bob Dylan thought that
he was just saying what everybody thought.
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But people are like, this guy
thinks a lot about freedom and oppression,
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and this guy has a weird voice, and he actually thought that we want
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to hear that. Let's hear some
more, you know. So that's what
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art is. But your your comic
voice, it can change. And the
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more dire circumstances you find you are
in not gonna win. But in my
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experience, the funnier you get,
the momentorial gift. Well, you know
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you're asking me. I just realized
because when I started out, I did
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my whole my Bigfoot routine, which
actually was really about being a frustrated writer.
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And now I'm doing a lot more
stuff about marriage and having children,
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your teenager and different things. So
I think that my comic voice is also
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changed too, because I have new
pain in my life. Yeah, you
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have a good bit. I really
like. I won't do it here,
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but about the urinal and the algorithm
of how close you are oh achieving dream
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and how far you are from the
urinal and how close how far your wife
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wants you to be from your dream. It's complicated. I can't do it
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justice, but you don't have to
do it here. It's really funny because
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it's true. So there are other
people with misery, and then they will
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identify with you. But in the
eighties. I'm like, I'm making a
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lot of money. I got a
lot of chicks, I got a nice
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car, I live in Manhattan,
got a radio job. So what about
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those chicken McNuggets? Man about that? I wasn't upset about anything. There's
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no art, where's the misery,
where's the tension? Truth? Intention?
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That's comedy. So you talk about
something that's true. My wife hates me.
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I guess I'm gonna be with her
forever. You know, opposites don't
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attract. Actually, Mark Norman had
a good comeback when somebody heckled him.
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Some nurse was heckling him, and
he goes, what are you? Because
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I'm a capricorn and he goes,
what is he? She goes, He's
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a tourist. He goes, So
tourists people are nice? Right, because
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that's a really good line. But
yeah, sorry, oh yeah, so
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your comic voice will change. But
like Tim was going to stop by the
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police a lot, and so was
I, And I said, just right
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about it, right, get it
out of his system. Yeah, what
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else are you gonna do? Paunch
a police officer to do that, and
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you know, take it out on
your wife. No, it's right.
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I think you said it, I
might be confusing you with something Joe Rogan
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said, but I remember you were
talking about Louis c K and you said
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he didn't really become a great comedian
until he started talking about his kids in
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his marriage. Before that, he
was just kind of a you know,
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middle of the road comic. But
once he actually started opening up about his
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kids and also the problems he was
having with his wife at that time,
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that's when he his comedy really became
fantastic. Yeah. One of his ng
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breakout moments was when he started it
was anti PC to say my kids are
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idiots. You couldn't say that.
That's what he would come out and say,
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you go, my daughter's five to
go. It's a truck, daddy.
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It's a truck. He's like,
yeah, he signed, it's a
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truck. Let's get in the car. It's a truck, daddy. And
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you know, he'd say, you
know, my my daughters are fing idiots.
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They're eight and five. Don't worry, w Older, it'll be a
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PC eventually. But that he was
the first one I heard do that.
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Okay, then it was sorry it
was you that that said that to you.
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Yeah. Yeah, And once you
become a dad, you know you
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realize these moments. Yeah, that's
a bridge, daddy, that's a bridge.
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That's a bridge. Were ten minutes
late for the Dutches' appoint It's I
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know, it's an effort bridge.
Shut up you, I mean, daddy,
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I'm gonna write about you when you
get older. It's an fint bridge.
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It's a bridge's bridge. It's like, that's blue, that's red.
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That's why Luis k jok he goes, Daddy, that's blue, Daddy,
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that's red. He goes, come
on, captain obvious, you're late for
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school. It's funny because as a
dad, you know that you can't say
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that, but you want to,
but you're stifled. So he says it
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for you. That's the tension,
that's the truth and the attention. Patrece
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O'Neill was just that, I think
before David Lucas. I think he might
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be or incarnate Patersa o neil.
Yeah, Paterresa O'Neil. He was not
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afraid to insult the ladies and just
amazing just what he could get away with.
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And he has a real quick one
where he says, uh so women,
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if you had a horrible car accident
and your vagina was destroyed. How
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would how would you still keep your
men? And they're going like I would
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give Ral, I would give hayn
Old blah blah, Yeah, boob job
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blah bah blah. And he goes, now, remember that I never called
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you Horrorse, But all of you
women are calling yourself horrorse. You Paul
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being with your suggestions. I never
suggested. I was thinking, like smile
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Moore. I was thinking like,
learn how to tell a story, learn
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how to drive. I heard,
be nice to my friends. I heard
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yeah. Bill Burr was telling a
story about him and Patrese were in a
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bar and there were these two they
were like supermodels, and I can't do
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the story justice, but he said, basically, Patrice started insulting them,
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you know, insulting their looks.
And he said by the end he had
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both of them like hanging off his
arms. They were ready to do with.
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Here was an o Pece, older
black guy. He died of diabetes
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and peace. But yeah, he
was amazing. He had another one where
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he said women can't tell stories,
and some woman goes, that's not true.
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He goes, tell me a story, why that's not true? A
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bit you can't and he told the
story where his wife came home and she
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goes, you know Lisa, because
I don't know Lisa. Wife comes home
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and goes you know a girl.
No, I don't know her. No,
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you know Lisa. I don't know
Lisa. He goes anyway, So
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no, you know Lisa. You
remember that party you didn't want to go
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to it. I made you go
to it. I made you re talk
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to that girl. Yeah, I
remember that bitch. Yeah that was Lisa.
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Okay, I know that bitch,
all right. So what happened?
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Well, somebody got shot? Was
it, Lisa? No? Lisa and
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I were walking along? So who
got shot? Well, Lisa and I
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were walking along and we heard two
gun shots, so who got shot?
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Well? Actually, let me finish
the story. Finish it. Yeah,
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So we were walking along and then
I was with Lisa. We were talking
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about how she doesn't like her brother, not the game one, but the
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older one that is really mean to
her, the gay one. Who got
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shot? Bitch? So we were
walking along, we heard the two gun
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shots, So who got shot?
So we don't actually just tell me?
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So we don't know who got shot? So Lisa didn't get shot? No,
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so why didn't you bring her up
because I was with her when someone
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got shot. But you don't know
who got shot. That's not a story,
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bitch, that's not a story.
Go back, talk to police,
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find out who got shot, and
come back and tell me the story.
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And women are going now that never
happened. He goes, it happens a
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long time. Guys, raise your
hands anyway, said yeah, yeah,
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you can't tell stories. Learn how
to tell the story. Next week we'll
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be back to Steve Howard Mark Bailey
and talk about it.
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00:00:00.760 --> 00:00:04.679
It's Talk Funny, a podcast by
Mark Bailey and other comics from all over.
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00:00:04.799 --> 00:00:07.559
We ended up in Japan because in
space, no one can hear you
3
00:00:07.599 --> 00:00:11.560
speak Japanese, but in Japan,
no one gives you space. The Talk
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00:00:11.640 --> 00:00:16.440
Funny podcast from Nagoya Radio dot Com
and Nigoia Comedy. Here's Mark Bailey,
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00:00:16.640 --> 00:00:21.719
Mark Bailey and Steve Howard on Talk
Funny. We're just talking about the doing
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00:00:21.760 --> 00:00:26.399
comedy on stage, talking about our
lovely wives. It's much cheaper than therapy
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00:00:26.600 --> 00:00:30.399
because therapy is just having the same
arguments, but now in public and you
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00:00:30.440 --> 00:00:34.119
have at home, and you're paying
one hundred dollars and an hour. So
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00:00:34.759 --> 00:00:39.799
we're going to talk about some meta
comic issues. We talked about comic voices.
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Do that okay? So in John
Voorhouse's book he does talk about comic
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voice, and it's very important.
It's like who are you? Are you
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the angry comic? And I knew
Steve at the first. At first he
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wasn't angry comic, but it's Mary. So now we're all angry comics.
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But I'm an angry comic and I
do the angry comic thing. But you
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can also do the two. There's
the duieb vantage point. What's your vantage
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point? So one thing Steve Martin
taught me is there's two kinds of vantage
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points for comedy, especially for movies. If you watch comedy movies or any
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movie, you realize there's the same
guy in an insane world or the insane
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guy in the same world. Jim
Carrey is always the insane guy in the
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same world. Bruce Willis is the
same guy in an insane world. Robin
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Williams has done both. But commas
also do that. So Emo Phillips,
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he's a dewey be comic, and
those are more suited for one liners.
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Stephen Wright has this crazy phizzy hair
and does one liners. But if you're
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in a suit and tie and you
do one liners, it's kind of weird
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because you look like Bob Hope and
they expect Bob Hope how he does stories.
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So your vantage point is are you
the crazy comic and everyone's reacting to
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you, which is probably what I
do. By the end, I've had
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fans ask me later and they're like, you know, I really when you
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specified in, I really thust you. I thought you had lost your mind.
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They said, well, I succeeded
that's what I wanted to do to
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think, But did you I said, dunt, dun, dum. You
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don't know. That's what I want
you to think. I've lost it that
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I actually had a set that I
was gonna do, but I got on
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a tangent about the wife and it
ended up smashing a strata various that I
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have to turn into the Nagoya Museum
of Music, which doesn't exist, which
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I made up, which I pre
smashed the violin, and I almost went
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to jail for it because they thought
I was destroying I mean, Germany's people
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were coming up to me like,
how are you going to take this back
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to the museum? You don't get
comedy. They're like, I thought you
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lost your mind. Well that's what
I wanted. When Mark takes a knee,
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it means he's not being serious,
So that's what I wanted. But
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other people want to be the Jerry
Seinfeld is perfect simple. What's with what's
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with the tickets? What's with ticket
McNuggets, what's with Halloween? He's saying,
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everybody else is crazy? And I
prefer Sam Kinnison's. I prefer the
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00:03:02.439 --> 00:03:07.439
Bob Gothwaits. I prefer them.
They're insane and you don't know if they
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are insane. You really don't know. That's entertaining for me, and I
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identify with that. How about you, Well, I actually I was gonna
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ask you a question because I'm a
comedian that kind of feels like he recently
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found his voice. So when did
you feel like you found your voice?
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So I had two different voices when
I started in the eighties, I was
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a smart ass, young, thin, unmarried kid. And in the eighties
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we were doing more ethnic jokes because
it was New York. So I would
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do a joke about I think people
have you know, used this since then,
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but I did it first in the
eighties. I'll say the farmer's market.
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I'm not saying there's a lot of
Asians there, but I dropped to
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my keys and for Vietnamese guys came
running punk punk time, Right, you
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can do those jokes then, And
I told I'd say, you know,
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I'm not saying there's a lot of
gay people in my neighborhood, but they're
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having a meeting next week. It's
at Madison Square Garden. So it was
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just kind of ironic. More signed, more jewey. Yeah, they can't
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cancel you for saying juey yeah,
and more puns. Larry Miller, I
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played with him a lot, so
we both did a lot of puns.
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Kind of Bob Sagot is okay.
So Bob Saget would say he would do
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the award show, he said,
these are the nominees and then touch his
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knees to go these are my knees, and he'd say something like my girlfriend,
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she's four feet tall and nuts over
her. It's just a lot of
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puns. So puns were a lot
more welcome in the eighties when I was
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a radio until twenty ten, and
I started to get darker and darker,
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darker because I was married, and
then my kids got older, and as
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we've talked of Mike, the kids
they used to think I was daddy can
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do everything, So Daddy's useless when
they get to be thirteen, and even
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my joke's on radio got darker and
darker. It's like that was a song
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called suicide. But I can dream, can I? And I just do
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this and throw these off. So
by the time I went back, I
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did comedy here first in the Boy
in Osaka back in ninety three. In
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ninety five. By now I'm married, it got really dark. Okay,
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so my comic voice then became the
angry comic. So my voice changed because
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you have a mortgage, you have
kids that hate you, You have a
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lot of problems. I didn't have
any problems in the ages. I was
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a smartass. Yeah, you idiots
to get married and you get divorced and
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you hate your life. You guys
are schmucks. WHOA, let's let's put
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you in a time machine. This
is your life. You're gonna make jokes
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about wife and the onions thirty years. So that's how my voice changed about
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you. Well, as I said, I feel like I've just recently maybe
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found my voice. But one thing
the show we did a few shows ago,
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and that one when I was on
stage and I didn't even notice it,
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but timid show is this it was? It was in uh it was
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a coat of Arms in July with
Evans. Okay, okay, yah,
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But one thing, like I didn't
even notice it, but Tim Lyin came
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up to me after my set and
he said, he said that was weird
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because you were like walking around on
stage. He said, you never do
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that usually, just stand there like
stiff as a board, hunched over and
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he said you looked really really comfortable, And I said, yeah, I
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just I felt like everything was really
flowing and I could kind of, you
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know, connect with the audience a
little bit, and it was it really
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felt great. So that's why I
feel like maybe I've kind of found my
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voice now. Yeah, when you
feel if you don't own a car,
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I can't make jokes about driving,
you have to talk about your wife or
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whatever you're living. And gord Vidal
one of my favorite quotes from him,
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he said, you're actually in a
prison. The artist is in a prison,
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but he doesn't know he's in a
prison. He thinks everybody's in a
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prison. So when he looks out
the window and describes things from his prison,
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which his vantage point in comedy speak, other people think it's funny because
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they're not in a prison. They
realize he's in a prison. Yeah,
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but he doesn't realize that. And
he said, that's art, that's comedy,
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that's movies, that's writing, that's
poetry, that's music. Like you
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know, so when I get up
and talk about how horrible my life is
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with being married, and people are
like, but I'm married and I'm happy,
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I don't understand what's the matter.
With this guy. Oh, he's
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in a prison of his own mind. But that's where your art comes from.
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Your art comes from the tension of
trying to shout from the prison and
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telling people, no, you're like
me, No we're not, We're not.
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That's what's funny. And so in
the eighties, I didn't have any
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problem. I was making two hundred
thousand dollars a year. I had a
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great radio job. I had a
great speech wrinning job. I was getting
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laid. I had no problems.
How can I be funny? I don't
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have any tapes, but Logan had
a tape and he sent me one and
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I lost it. I had no
tension. Imagine if Sam Kinison was happily
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married, how entertaining would that be. Imagine if Lenny Bruce had no problems
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with the law. Yeah, it
reminds me of what Hemingway said, writing
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is easy. All you do is
sit down and cut yourself and belied or
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something like that. Yeah. So
I really like that Gore Vidal quote,
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which is that Bob Dylan thought that
he was just saying what everybody thought.
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But people are like, this guy
thinks a lot about freedom and oppression,
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and this guy has a weird voice, and he actually thought that we want
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to hear that. Let's hear some
more, you know. So that's what
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art is. But your your comic
voice, it can change. And the
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more dire circumstances you find you are
in not gonna win. But in my
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experience, the funnier you get,
the momentorial gift. Well, you know
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you're asking me. I just realized
because when I started out, I did
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my whole my Bigfoot routine, which
actually was really about being a frustrated writer.
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And now I'm doing a lot more
stuff about marriage and having children,
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your teenager and different things. So
I think that my comic voice is also
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changed too, because I have new
pain in my life. Yeah, you
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have a good bit. I really
like. I won't do it here,
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but about the urinal and the algorithm
of how close you are oh achieving dream
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and how far you are from the
urinal and how close how far your wife
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wants you to be from your dream. It's complicated. I can't do it
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justice, but you don't have to
do it here. It's really funny because
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it's true. So there are other
people with misery, and then they will
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identify with you. But in the
eighties. I'm like, I'm making a
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lot of money. I got a
lot of chicks, I got a nice
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car, I live in Manhattan,
got a radio job. So what about
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those chicken McNuggets? Man about that? I wasn't upset about anything. There's
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no art, where's the misery,
where's the tension? Truth? Intention?
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That's comedy. So you talk about
something that's true. My wife hates me.
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I guess I'm gonna be with her
forever. You know, opposites don't
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attract. Actually, Mark Norman had
a good comeback when somebody heckled him.
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Some nurse was heckling him, and
he goes, what are you? Because
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I'm a capricorn and he goes,
what is he? She goes, He's
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a tourist. He goes, So
tourists people are nice? Right, because
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that's a really good line. But
yeah, sorry, oh yeah, so
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00:10:01.759 --> 00:10:05.840
your comic voice will change. But
like Tim was going to stop by the
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00:10:05.840 --> 00:10:07.080
police a lot, and so was
I, And I said, just right
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00:10:07.159 --> 00:10:09.440
about it, right, get it
out of his system. Yeah, what
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00:10:09.480 --> 00:10:13.120
else are you gonna do? Paunch
a police officer to do that, and
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00:10:13.200 --> 00:10:16.720
you know, take it out on
your wife. No, it's right.
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00:10:16.039 --> 00:10:20.679
I think you said it, I
might be confusing you with something Joe Rogan
159
00:10:20.759 --> 00:10:24.799
said, but I remember you were
talking about Louis c K and you said
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00:10:24.080 --> 00:10:28.440
he didn't really become a great comedian
until he started talking about his kids in
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00:10:28.480 --> 00:10:33.279
his marriage. Before that, he
was just kind of a you know,
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middle of the road comic. But
once he actually started opening up about his
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kids and also the problems he was
having with his wife at that time,
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that's when he his comedy really became
fantastic. Yeah. One of his ng
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breakout moments was when he started it
was anti PC to say my kids are
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idiots. You couldn't say that.
That's what he would come out and say,
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you go, my daughter's five to
go. It's a truck, daddy.
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00:10:58.600 --> 00:11:00.600
It's a truck. He's like,
yeah, he signed, it's a
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00:11:00.639 --> 00:11:03.440
truck. Let's get in the car. It's a truck, daddy. And
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00:11:03.480 --> 00:11:07.039
you know, he'd say, you
know, my my daughters are fing idiots.
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00:11:07.399 --> 00:11:11.720
They're eight and five. Don't worry, w Older, it'll be a
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00:11:11.799 --> 00:11:13.679
PC eventually. But that he was
the first one I heard do that.
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Okay, then it was sorry it
was you that that said that to you.
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Yeah. Yeah, And once you
become a dad, you know you
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realize these moments. Yeah, that's
a bridge, daddy, that's a bridge.
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That's a bridge. Were ten minutes
late for the Dutches' appoint It's I
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know, it's an effort bridge.
Shut up you, I mean, daddy,
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I'm gonna write about you when you
get older. It's an fint bridge.
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It's a bridge's bridge. It's like, that's blue, that's red.
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That's why Luis k jok he goes, Daddy, that's blue, Daddy,
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that's red. He goes, come
on, captain obvious, you're late for
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school. It's funny because as a
dad, you know that you can't say
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that, but you want to,
but you're stifled. So he says it
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for you. That's the tension,
that's the truth and the attention. Patrece
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O'Neill was just that, I think
before David Lucas. I think he might
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be or incarnate Patersa o neil.
Yeah, Paterresa O'Neil. He was not
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afraid to insult the ladies and just
amazing just what he could get away with.
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And he has a real quick one
where he says, uh so women,
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if you had a horrible car accident
and your vagina was destroyed. How
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would how would you still keep your
men? And they're going like I would
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give Ral, I would give hayn
Old blah blah, Yeah, boob job
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blah bah blah. And he goes, now, remember that I never called
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you Horrorse, But all of you
women are calling yourself horrorse. You Paul
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being with your suggestions. I never
suggested. I was thinking, like smile
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Moore. I was thinking like,
learn how to tell a story, learn
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how to drive. I heard,
be nice to my friends. I heard
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yeah. Bill Burr was telling a
story about him and Patrese were in a
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bar and there were these two they
were like supermodels, and I can't do
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the story justice, but he said, basically, Patrice started insulting them,
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you know, insulting their looks.
And he said by the end he had
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both of them like hanging off his
arms. They were ready to do with.
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Here was an o Pece, older
black guy. He died of diabetes
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and peace. But yeah, he
was amazing. He had another one where
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he said women can't tell stories,
and some woman goes, that's not true.
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He goes, tell me a story, why that's not true? A
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bit you can't and he told the
story where his wife came home and she
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goes, you know Lisa, because
I don't know Lisa. Wife comes home
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and goes you know a girl.
No, I don't know her. No,
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you know Lisa. I don't know
Lisa. He goes anyway, So
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no, you know Lisa. You
remember that party you didn't want to go
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to it. I made you go
to it. I made you re talk
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to that girl. Yeah, I
remember that bitch. Yeah that was Lisa.
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Okay, I know that bitch,
all right. So what happened?
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Well, somebody got shot? Was
it, Lisa? No? Lisa and
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I were walking along? So who
got shot? Well, Lisa and I
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were walking along and we heard two
gun shots, so who got shot?
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Well? Actually, let me finish
the story. Finish it. Yeah,
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So we were walking along and then
I was with Lisa. We were talking
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about how she doesn't like her brother, not the game one, but the
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older one that is really mean to
her, the gay one. Who got
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shot? Bitch? So we were
walking along, we heard the two gun
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shots, So who got shot?
So we don't actually just tell me?
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So we don't know who got shot? So Lisa didn't get shot? No,
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so why didn't you bring her up
because I was with her when someone
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got shot. But you don't know
who got shot. That's not a story,
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bitch, that's not a story.
Go back, talk to police,
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find out who got shot, and
come back and tell me the story.
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And women are going now that never
happened. He goes, it happens a
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long time. Guys, raise your
hands anyway, said yeah, yeah,
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you can't tell stories. Learn how
to tell the story. Next week we'll
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be back to Steve Howard Mark Bailey
and talk about it.
