00:00:07
Speaker 1: What is up, everybody?
00:00:08
Speaker 2: And welcome once again, because you have just tuned in to Real Laughs on Real Radio 104.1.
00:00:13
Speaker 1: I'm your host tonight.
00:00:15
Speaker 2: That's right. I'm sitting in the big chair. I am James Young, comedian extraordinaire. And I'm in studio, virtual that is, with my good friend, the Orlando godfather of comedy. But he got a new name tonight, people. It says, are you ready for some football? Because that's right in the back. Man, look at him. Football back, y'all.
00:00:36
Speaker 1: Bro, I drove home from the show. Yeah. I got home at 1255. Damn.
00:00:41
Speaker 3: I already had my laptop set up. I'm talking about in the evening time, not night.
00:00:47
Speaker 1: Okay.
00:00:48
Speaker 3: Because I work from 1 to 6. I already had my laptop set up.
00:00:52
Speaker 2: Man, I logged into work at 1, and at 101.
00:00:55
Speaker 1: I was on the couch watching football. Yeah. Hey, my team's messenger was like, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me. Hey, they needed some help.
00:01:05
Speaker 3: I'm like, Carolina playing. I check on that mall outage at four o'clock, bro.
00:01:11
Speaker 1: Oh, not one store in the mall, hey.
00:01:14
Speaker 2: Not one store. Everything just down, bro. Can't nobody, can't no. Hey, unless you was a bar, Like, if you was a restaurant and we read your internet, I ain't care.
00:01:26
Speaker 1: But if you had some TVs.
00:01:29
Speaker 3: And people was trying to watch the game, hey, Ken Miller, I even bumped some of y'all internet up.
00:01:35
Speaker 1: For football day. Hey, let's go. Some of y'all gave y'all 10 extra megs on me. Oh, that's funny. That's funny. Now I got to go remember to turn it back to regular. Back down? Hey.
00:01:46
Speaker 2: If you gave your Buffalo wild wings and Miami mall, if you.
00:01:50
Speaker 3: Would speed and that was me, baby, I gave you an extra hundred Meg internet for the day.
00:01:55
Speaker 1: Hey, y'all better act right, all you Mickey Fickies out there. Man, this is my favorite. And I know we supposed to be boycotting.
00:02:00
Speaker 2: I don't really never boycott stuff we supposed to be boycotting.
00:02:04
Speaker 1: Are we still boycotting? All right, man. I don't know, bro.
00:02:08
Speaker 2: Hey, they keep giving us all these black people at the Super Bowl. I'm like, I guess we good. What if I boycott my own way? Like, what if I still go to Target, but I take a knee when I get in there?
00:02:18
Speaker 1: Yeah, there you go. I take a knee.
00:02:21
Speaker 3: Hey, what if I go to Target and I get them attitude?
00:02:25
Speaker 2: Yeah. I'm spending the money there. But I'd be like, yo, F you, Caroline, at the register.
00:02:32
Speaker 3: That's why your mama's stuck. Like, I say bad stuff to her. I make them go get me stuff I ain't even going to purchase. I've been like, hey, man, I need a breast pump. My kid getting breastfed, and they bring it to me and say, oh, my bad, I forgot. My daughter's 21. You can go put it back.
00:02:52
Speaker 2: Bro, I need a breast pump for the left breast. Not the right side. Just left only. Bring me left breast pumps only. Yeah, I go to Target. I be rude with it, bro. I go to Target. I change the expiration date on the eggs. I'm going to make it inconvenient. I'm going, but I'm going to make it inconvenient for everybody.
00:03:16
Speaker 1: Don't buy no soap at Target. I done emptied all of that out. Hey, I'm going.
00:03:22
Speaker 2: I'm going to make it inconvenient for people. Just let you know. Just let you know.
00:03:26
Speaker 1: Hilarious.
00:03:26
Speaker 2: That's how we boycott, baby. Hey, I'm going to tell you right now. Don't buy no washing powder. I don't put bleach all in that.
00:03:33
Speaker 1: All in it, bro.
00:03:34
Speaker 2: In the express line with 11 items. Hey, just know, B.
00:03:41
Speaker 3: Hey, I go to the line where I got to ring stuff up myself one item at a time.
00:03:46
Speaker 1: Bing, pay. Bing, pay.
00:03:50
Speaker 3: Bing, pay. 37 transactions. I hold that line up.
00:03:56
Speaker 1: Hey.
00:03:59
Speaker 2: I'm inconvenienced in them.
00:04:02
Speaker 1: There you go. Just know that.
00:04:04
Speaker 2: I do it the community way. I say, bing, one for Target, put one in the bag, one for me. Bing, one for Target, one in the bag for free for me. That's how I'm doing it. Community style. That's how we boycott. I stand with you, Cap.
00:04:17
Speaker 1: I'm with you, baby.
00:04:20
Speaker 3: I don't even know if we really boycotted football i i don't know i don't know i don't even know because everybody's like i ain't watching football all the dudes i know say they ain't watching football the next day that next sunday they had their team jersey on so yeah.
00:04:37
Speaker 2: Every everybody's still watching football that i know that's why when you said are we boycotting i'm like are you sure we're boycotting?
00:04:43
Speaker 3: Cause I'm still watching you. I don't boycott much, bro. So just know, I will say that I have boycotted white women.
00:04:50
Speaker 1: A real, well, that helps cause you're married, but yeah.
00:04:53
Speaker 3: See, see, see how I, I boycotted him so much. I married a black woman.
00:05:00
Speaker 1: That does help. Hey man, you boycott. Yeah. Yeah. Cause you know what? The hardest part of dating is your wife. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, for real, bro. For real.
00:05:11
Speaker 2: Oh, Well, we want to say welcome, my friend, our official sponsor and fellow comedian was having a couple of Internet issues.
00:05:19
Speaker 1: Thank you, Spectrum. Hey, when are we going to sue Spectrum, by the way?
00:05:22
Speaker 2: When are we going to get together as a group, as a collective and just finally sue them?
00:05:27
Speaker 1: Man, ever since AI took over Ken's company, I haven't been able to do anything on my computer. God. Hey, baby. I ain't even mad at you, Jeff. I get it. Yeah, you want to be fired? You're like, hey, man, it's trash right here, y'all. I'm sorry. Every time something goes wrong, you don't even have a reason for it. Your camera don't work. Computer don't turn on. And it's not like I have anything on this damn thing. I'm just waiting for my new Apple iPhone. We'll use that from now on. Big enough for a computer. Don't need to screw around no more.
00:06:00
Speaker 2: Well, I hope you don't go to the iStore where Ken covers it during a football game because ain't nobody hiding on the internet.
00:06:06
Speaker 1: Hey, look here.
00:06:08
Speaker 3: On Sunday, if Carolina's playing and I got to work, just know the internet ain't working.
00:06:16
Speaker 1: Hey, man.
00:06:19
Speaker 3: Just take an extended lunch break. Take an extended lunch break.
00:06:24
Speaker 1: The internet ain't working.
00:06:25
Speaker 2: But like I said, if you got a restaurant and it got TVs, a bar, you're getting an extra hundred meg.
00:06:33
Speaker 1: I got you. Damn. Look at that. I got you. An extra hundred meg. I got you.
00:06:38
Speaker 2: Let me ask you a question because you are a resident sports expert, man. So how is your team looking this year for football? man can hey can you get ready to bleep this yeah yes man the panthers bro bro i'm so mad hey i'm sorry i'm lagging right now because it's spectrum of course so bro i'm watching the game if they play chicago it's 31 31 all these chicago people are like ah ah James, I promise you, I went to get something to eat.
00:07:15
Speaker 1: I came back. It was 59-31. I said, what happened? You made a sandwich? I made a sandwich. That's what happened, man. It was 59-2. The NFC South, terrible. Carolina lost. Tampa lost. New Orleans lost. The Falcons lost. Terrible. What happened, man? They just trapped.
00:07:43
Speaker 3: I think whoever made the playoffs last year, our conference was 8-10. They had a losing record and made it to the playoffs. Because one team from each division got to make it. And they won a division and they had an 8-10 record and got a home field the first game of the playoffs.
00:08:04
Speaker 1: Damn. How you do that? The team they played had 12 wins. You know why Tampa Bay lost? Because they just gave them the money. The minute they gave Baker the money, boom, lose. Yeah, wow, man.
00:08:17
Speaker 2: And he actually played decent yesterday.
00:08:20
Speaker 1: He played pretty decent.
00:08:22
Speaker 2: Not $ 165 million good.
00:08:24
Speaker 1: Can we talk.
00:08:25
Speaker 2: About the fact that how incredibly, insanely large... The contracts are nowadays.
00:08:33
Speaker 1: Defensive box getting $ 40 million. Come on.
00:08:37
Speaker 3: Let me tell you something, bro. In the NBA, and I'm telling you, it's about to be in baseball. Don't be shocked in five years you see a billion-dollar contract.
00:08:47
Speaker 1: Well, you already have one. Hi, Tony. What was his name? Yeah, but here's my back load.
00:08:52
Speaker 2: He's going to be 70 years old getting $ 30 million.
00:08:57
Speaker 3: Bro, I'm like the Supermax in the NBA... It's like $ 450 million.
00:09:04
Speaker 1: That tells me that the owners are making crazy money.
00:09:08
Speaker 2: Oh, stupid money, bro. If you pay somebody that... Well, that's what the teams are worth. It's the equity in the team. It's how much the teams are worth nowadays. There's no way these teams are making that money.
00:09:18
Speaker 1: I don't know. I think the Knicks make money just off of merchandise. Yeah, TV money.
00:09:23
Speaker 3: A lot of it's TV deals and sponsorship deals. But I want you, Jeff, the teams themselves... The arenas are selling out, but $ 20, $ 30 tickets. Magic aren't making money.
00:09:37
Speaker 1: Yeah. Yeah. I agree.
00:09:40
Speaker 3: But TV deals and 26 out of 30 teams. And the revenue is shared.
00:09:45
Speaker 2: So that billion dollars that CBS gives, you know, them to play NBA games, the team's got to share that money.
00:09:52
Speaker 3: But you also got sponsorships and and stuff like that. But the team itself, I seriously doubt they're making money like that.
00:10:00
Speaker 1: Man it's got to be more than a billion because that's like i just do a number that's like what they pay three teams the nfl team has to be over i mean that's just nuts that's crazy money now i'll tell you what i was in i was in nashville this weekend And I'm at a steak restaurant, and the Texas-Ohio State game is on. And Ohio State is beating them by 20 points. Yeah. Going into the fourth quarter and lost by one point. Yeah. How? Man. Woo-hoo. Man.
00:10:35
Speaker 2: I know people in Ohio sick. My mom. My mom's a big... She was from Ohio. She said, I went into the bathroom and I came back.
00:10:44
Speaker 1: Bro, I'm telling you. That's funny. Like, Ken, I'm telling you. I came back. That's wild. That's wild. So, Ken, I know this is your thing, though. Football, you love it. You watch it.
00:10:55
Speaker 2: Hey, we're just going to root for you, Carolina, man. We're going to root for you. I'm a root for... I'm diehard when it comes to.
00:11:03
Speaker 1: I know you are. Football is that one sport where.
00:11:07
Speaker 2: People really love, like, I know Jets fans, bro.
00:11:12
Speaker 1: Dean Napolitano. Dean Napolitano. Dean Napolitano, yeah. They're nuts. And they love that team. They do. Love that team. They stick with them. They terrible. Terrible. They love that garbage team. They love them. They reckon it's Owen Terrible. That's it. They ain't won any sentence. Joe Namath played. Damn. Bro, that's how long it takes to win anything. He ain't lying. Wow. So I looked it up, Jay.
00:11:39
Speaker 3: So the NFL right now has an 11-year deal with four networks for roughly $ 113 billion.
00:11:45
Speaker 1: Oh, my gosh.
00:11:46
Speaker 2: The NBA has an 11-year deal with TV right now.
00:11:49
Speaker 1: For $ 77 billion.
00:11:49
Speaker 2: Wow.
00:11:56
Speaker 1: And do you know Netflix just got an NFL deal?
00:12:00
Speaker 3: I heard that. You had to have Netflix. Because I think Prime had it. I don't know if Prime still has it. But Netflix, like, look, man, we'll take whatever. Netflix got The Breakfast Club now. Netflix got WWE. All the podcasts except Joe Budden.
00:12:15
Speaker 2: Podcasts.
00:12:16
Speaker 1: Yeah, man. Yeah, yeah. Joe Budden on Tubi. I watched him on Tubi the other day. We holding out. We holding out on Netflix. We're in negotiations. Yeah. He's soaking up everything though, man. At some point, anybody comes to get to that $ 3. We're not, we're not going in. Hey man.
00:12:34
Speaker 2: Hey, I don't like the fact y'all cracking down on where I can use my account, man.
00:12:40
Speaker 1: They always ask me, is this really your home? Yes.
00:12:43
Speaker 2: My home.
00:12:43
Speaker 1: If I say it is. Yeah. Yeah.
00:12:46
Speaker 2: They'd be like, you had a, you had a brothel. Yo, I'm spending the night.
00:12:52
Speaker 3: Okay, the brothers, hey, that happens when I use, shout out to my dog, Devin, when I use his YouTube TV.
00:12:57
Speaker 1: Yeah. They be like, are you home? I'm like, no. I'm like, I'm on a business trip. Like, all right, well, you got 72 hours.
00:13:03
Speaker 2: Damn.
00:13:03
Speaker 1: After that, after that, you better figure out some TV, cuz. That's funny.
00:13:10
Speaker 2: I'm on a visit trip. You got 72 hours. For real, they be like, you got 72 hours to watch TV. You be like, dang, bro.
00:13:16
Speaker 1: That's rude. That's why you have to download everything before you go anywhere.
00:13:20
Speaker 3: Because everything's streaming now. Everything is pretty much, you know. Why have cable now when everything is on a streaming platform?
00:13:29
Speaker 1: The best shows are on. Y'all got cable? I don't got cable. I got it for free. I prefer the internet. Yeah. Yeah.
00:13:36
Speaker 3: If you got spectrum internet, they'll give you spectrum TV for free.
00:13:41
Speaker 1: I don't even want it. Yeah, I do.
00:13:43
Speaker 2: I watch the news. That's all I watch. That's all my, my mother. I watch the news and she yells at it, curses at it, tells me to come look at stuff.
00:13:50
Speaker 1: I don't want to see. I can't watch the news anymore. I can't. Oh man. I want people to talk about stuff there. You know, anybody on the news now you go, are you a reporter? No, no. I just, I just, No, I'm going to pick it. I can't give you my opinion. They let that woman off? Boy, we'll talk about that when we get back. We will.
00:14:10
Speaker 2: We'll be right back.
00:14:13
Speaker 1: We'll be right back. We'll be right back. We'll be right.
00:14:18
Speaker 2: Back right here on Real Last Real Radio with a 4.1.
00:14:33
Speaker 1: Central Florida, are you ready to laugh?
00:14:36
Speaker 2: Join House of Laughter for the Laugh Reunion on Saturday, September 19th at the Hideaway Performing Arts Center in Eustis. Featuring Curtis Bateman, Jay Paul, comedian Doc, and Meech Doll.
00:14:49
Speaker 1: Four incredible acts for you to see that night for nonstop laughs.
00:14:53
Speaker 2: Doors open at 5.30, show is at 6. Tickets are $ 20 right now or $ 25 at the doors. they're selling fast so get yours right now go to hideawaypac.com that's hideawaypac.com it's the laugh reunion remember the only thing better than laughing is laughing.
00:15:11
Speaker 1: Together Welcome back, everybody.
00:15:18
Speaker 2: This is still Real Ass on Real Radio 104.1.
00:15:22
Speaker 1: I'm your host today, Mr. James John.
00:15:23
Speaker 2: We got Ken Miller in the house. He got a lot of Orlando comedy, but he is a.k.a. Are you ready for some football? And of course, we have our official sponsor from the law offices of Kauffman and Lynn. They are your official personal injury attorneys. They've been representing and winning for the good people of Orlando for over 20 years. Jeff's not only a lawyer, he is a comedian and comic book creator. Now, Jeff, you say they let that woman talk. What woman are you talking about, sir?
00:15:50
Speaker 1: I think we need to change the term from white privilege to white lady privilege. Yeah. Because white women get away with everything.
00:15:58
Speaker 3: Jeff, I'm glad you're here. Jeff, if you can, break it down for us. I know the lady killed her kids. What happened with this jury thing? I know one jury was like, what is going on? All I know is she killed these kids and white people. She okay?
00:16:16
Speaker 1: No, not all white people. A lot of us going, white women?
00:16:22
Speaker 3: White women are all going crazy.
00:16:25
Speaker 1: White men are going, no.
00:16:27
Speaker 2: 47500 Jeff.
00:16:30
Speaker 1: Jeff, please tell us what is going on, brother. All right. Here's what happened. She used a mental. She said, listen, I have a mental disability, but it only happened once, which I love. It's temporary insanity. I heard a voice once and never heard it again. And it just so happens that voice told me to kill my kids. And I listened. Bro, Jeff. She doesn't testify, which she doesn't have to. Okay. But when you're nutty and your doctor says, hey, listen, yeah, she was suffering and we gave her some medication and she doesn't remember anything.
00:17:03
Speaker 2: Wait, she's got to testify, but she doesn't testify. So her doctor, who they pay to testify, he gives his testimony. And the jurors, it was a hung jury. There were 12 jurors.
00:17:17
Speaker 1: Are you serious? Yes. There are 12 jurors and one held out. It was 11 to 1. And I want to tell you what, I am so happy about this one. James, you know who held out. They have one black man on board. He said, are you effing kidding me? I might marry one, but I ain't going to let it get away with murder. Murder, yeah, man. This dude said– and all the white women were losing their mind. We couldn't believe he wouldn't do this.
00:17:48
Speaker 2: And their argument– this is the old white woman argument, and this is what the head juror said.
00:17:54
Speaker 1: She just didn't seem like the type. She never had issues with her kids before, so it had to be something. What do you mean they– What argument is that? They never had problems before. Is that my argument for killing people? What are we doing? Because we use damn words like, I'm alive. That's why we have this problem. Because nobody goes, she killed her kids.
00:18:16
Speaker 2: She got to go.
00:18:19
Speaker 1: She didn't kill them like, hey, let me just drive into a river because I lost my mind temporarily. I'm going to break out some exercise bands and strangle each one of them. Bro. They didn't kill him with a gun like pop, pop, pop. She had to slowly strangle three kids with an exercise band. This is the wrong world we live in.
00:18:41
Speaker 2: This is the world we live in where people go, well, that makes sense to me.
00:18:46
Speaker 1: We've gone crazy. I use the wrong pronouns. They put me to death. You can't Bro, if he would have hurt a dog, we would be up in arms. Yeah. Oh, yeah. If it was a dog, they would have, they would have, they gave her the death penalty. Jeff question though.
00:19:02
Speaker 2: So the, the long juror, a black guy who, who, you know, voted, I guess what, against whatever, why is it all of a sudden his criminal record is being brought out?
00:19:12
Speaker 1: Well, if he, if he didn't say he had a criminal record when he got sworn in, that could be a problem. But the fact is this, it was a mistrial. First thing they ask you when you– one of the questions is, have you ever been arrested as a conviction, as a felony, whatever? And then they get a chance to pick you. But here's the deal. They just didn't like it because he held out. That was it. If he would have went along with them, nobody would be arguing about it. They wouldn't care. It wouldn't matter to anybody. Yes. God, I hated this trial from beginning to end because everybody on the internet was nuts over it. They didn't sit there. They didn't understand. But there were people on that jury who had– of Facebook groups who were supporting other bad people. Yeah. So these people came in. This is a celebrity case. They couldn't wait to get on this case. You know how I know? Because the Russian was in jury duty. And the Russian knew specifically we were going to New York City that Friday. And it was a Tuesday. And she goes, well, I won't get on jury duty. I have all these reasons not to. She found out it was a murder trial. She wanted it. And she was like, I'll take seat number one. No, sit in the back. Bro. Women love murder. They love the murder podcast.
00:20:25
Speaker 2: Yeah.
00:20:26
Speaker 1: They love this stuff. Ken, you like true crime. Would you like to be on a jury like that?
00:20:30
Speaker 3: Oh, heck yeah. I'd love to be on a jury like that. Oh, the Lord would be like, yo, yo, she guilty, son. Because I ain't got no criminal record. They ain't got nothing bad. And I served my country. They ain't got nothing bad.
00:20:43
Speaker 2: But what happened is they started spreading all this hate about me.
00:20:48
Speaker 1: And I slowly started killing off his jury.
00:20:52
Speaker 2: Well, you had postpartum depression, man. Hey, Jeff, I got post-jury depression.
00:20:57
Speaker 1: Yes. PJD. I got PJD, baby.
00:21:03
Speaker 2: I kill all they asses, James.
00:21:08
Speaker 1: You already know.
00:21:10
Speaker 2: My murdering started with Abraham Lincoln. I would kill more white people if I got.
00:21:16
Speaker 1: To, bro. You see these reporters when they talk about it? Yeah. Wait a minute. What are you thinking, people? What is your issue? And my favorite, and I'm going to tell you, you've seen the clip. You've seen the clip. Yeah. Oprah's buddy loses her mind. She loses her mind because, you know, I wish only an old white woman would pull this one off. They're not supposed to say anything about the person. They go, well, give me the makeup of the jury. And the white woman goes, well, there was and there was only one person of color. OK, OK. And who was the one to hold out? Was he a person of color?
00:21:56
Speaker 2: Yes.
00:21:56
Speaker 1: Yes. So he said the black guy did it. That's what the white woman said. The black guy did it. I swear to God, it's like every white woman trying to fake that how she killed her kids. It was a black man. That's what this woman did. A gay king does this. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. That's troubling. I'm going to have to think about that later. Why do you have to think about it later that the only one who didn't find him guilty was a black man and that bothers you somehow? Bruh.
00:22:27
Speaker 2: Because you know he was in there going, have y'all lost your mind? She thinks she got Oprah money. That's how come. Yeah.
00:22:33
Speaker 1: She thinks she's Oprah. You ain't Oprah. You Oprah's friend. Yeah, you standing in side feet. What?
00:22:39
Speaker 2: But I was so blown away by that. I was sitting there going, is this who we are now?
00:22:45
Speaker 1: Yes. That's what's crazy to me, man. She was so... And the one dude goes, sorry, I ain't buying that. He's like, nah, nah. Because if it was the other way, I thought the jury would go the other way, actually. But then I looked up the makeup of Massachusetts, of this county, and this county kind of leans in crazy town way. Oh, okay. So they got a bunch of crazy people on this jury. Where is it? Where's that? Crystal River? Money. I didn't want to say a pop-up. Hey, hey, hey, wait. Watch out.
00:23:21
Speaker 2: Wait, don't be talking about my city, baby. I just want to say, Gayle King, I'm on your side.
00:23:27
Speaker 1: You make $ 80 million. Don't listen to Jeff. You got money, baby. Network 80 million, bro. Oprah gave her 80, baby. I want to be Oprah's friend. Come on, y'all. Do me a favor. You got to look at, if you hadn't seen it yet, you're going to watch it and you're going to go, what happened to our world? Yeah, I saw it. When you watch it, were you like going, ooh. You know how that made me feel? I assume that's how exactly when I found out Bernie Madoff stole from all those people. That's exactly the way I felt. You're making my people look bad. Every Jew in the world goes, no, don't be Jewish. Let me ask you this question.
00:24:05
Speaker 2: Go ahead.
00:24:06
Speaker 1: Go ahead.
00:24:06
Speaker 2: Well, I'm just going to ask your professional opinion, Jeff. What do you think is going to happen to this woman in the end? Well, I gave my opinion the other day, and it was this simple. If this prosecutor wants some more attention, he's going to retry.
00:24:19
Speaker 1: Okay. And as a prosecutor, he now knows every trick they used. And they benefited from a jury believing the testimony. Well, they bring these doctors back. He knows exactly what they said. And what people don't realize about trials, this is... They got to depose these doctors the first time. A deposition is a sworn statement. Well, guess what? Another sworn statement is what they said in the courtroom. Your testimony. So now they have two sworn statements to use against this dude later if anything gets changed. So he can use a statement they made in the past trial because, well, you said this and use it against him. That's why it's always easier to find somebody guilty the second time around because the prosecutor can't be fooled by anything. No. He's already heard it.
00:25:02
Speaker 2: Hmm.
00:25:03
Speaker 1: But I don't think– right now, he goes 11 to 1, and I got lucky. Wow. He got lucky. And I'm telling you, these criminal defense attorneys, this is the biggest fallacy when it comes to picking juries. Everyone thinks that they can stereotype who they want on their jury. And they were thinking to themselves, and I'm telling you, this is exactly what this guy was thinking. He goes, oh, I got the black guy on my jury. He knows what it's like to be treated badly in society, everything else. And I had to tell people for years, the last one you want on your jury. Is an old black man because he is going to follow the law. He is not going to buy into your nonsense. He's not going to cut you a break. And they sit there the whole time and look and stare and pay attention all the time. Yeah. Yeah. You are not good. These are not dumb people. These are not people who want the system to flip around. They want everyone to be held accountable in the same way they are. I get that. That makes a lot of sense. I get that. I guarantee this guy thought to himself, this criminal defense juror attorney thought to himself, Ooh, I got lucky to get this guy and never thought he would be the one holdout. That's wild.
00:26:12
Speaker 2: Yeah.
00:26:12
Speaker 1: That's wild. Woo. All right, man. We're going to follow that case and see what happens to her.
00:26:17
Speaker 3: I'm with him, man. I, Jeff said it at the beginning, you strengthen your kids with exercise bands, right? That means you could... Let's say you was having a moment of craziness. On kid two, you should have been like, yo, what am I doing? You know what I'm saying?
00:26:37
Speaker 2: You ain't done instantly with an exercise band. No.
00:26:42
Speaker 1: She took phone calls from her husband. She took phone calls from her husband where she was calm and everything was cool. Yeah. You really want to say... If you tried to pull this, like, a couple years ago, it wouldn't even have been a thought. No. It wouldn't even have been a thought. And look at Casey Anthony. That's the best thing in the world. We think Casey Anthony, this woman didn't testify. They weren't even able to show how this kid died, and the whole country was livid. Yeah. But we know how this kid died. We knew who did it. Yeah. The question wasn't even, did she do it? We know depression exists. We know people are allowed to be depressed, but we normally don't allow people to get away with murder because of depression. That's different, bro. That's scary. You know the rule on mental issues? It has to be, you are so mentally impaired, you can't appreciate your conduct. It means you don't even understand what you're doing. But she was answering phone calls for her husband, Kong. Yeah. Yeah, you weren't crazy. No, these are just people who are looking for a reason. And you had two experts. One expert said, no, she understood. The other expert said, you know. And I was talking to a friend of mine who's really educated. And, you know, white woman. And she says, she goes, well, I'm still not sure the husband didn't do it. Bro. She admitted they did it. She said she did it. Her own team said she did it. Her own attorney said she did it. Out of nowhere, you think he's... That's a murder podcast. That's what it's about. It's you guys sitting there watching murders and believing DNA in 48 hours and all that stuff, and you lose your mind. Well, they didn't have no DNA. Snapped. All you guys watching those murder podcasts looking for reasons, and it's real simple. I'm tired of these damn kids. Bruh. That's what stress will do to you. Now, my son, Jacob, he wears me out at times, but I never go, you know, that exercise band. No. No. Wild as hell, man. You know what?
00:28:51
Speaker 2: And I'm going to say this. I know we got like 20 seconds left. I feel for the husband. That man lost his children and his partner. And people are blaming him for it. They actually think he's responsible.
00:29:05
Speaker 1: Yeah. Look it up, man. It's painful. This dude is living like he did it. Could you imagine? He's home working, doing a job. Hey, baby, everything fine? Come home? No. Where are my kids and where did our exercise bands go?
00:29:18
Speaker 2: That is crazy. Hey, I'm going to pray for everybody involved with this as well. Guys, on that note, we have to take a short break.
00:29:23
Speaker 1: Don't go nowhere. We'll be right back. This is Real Laughs on Real Radio 104.1. Thank you.
00:29:42
Speaker 2: Welcome back, everybody. You are still listening. It's us, Real Last on Real Radio 104.1. I want to remind you guys, if you're not following us on social media, I need y'all to go to Instagram, Facebook, and YouTube.
00:29:53
Speaker 1: We need to get this subscription up, guys.
00:29:55
Speaker 2: Please like, follow, comment, and share all this hilarity so we can keep it going for another 10 years. Remind you that our official sponsor is on with us from the law offices of Kauffman and Lynn. They are your personal injury attorneys. They've been representing and winning for the good people of Orlando for over 20 years. If you need more information, go to whenyouneedus.com. And Ken, tell them the phone number they can call.
00:30:17
Speaker 1: Four, seven, five hundred, Jeff. Four, seven, five hundred, Jeff.
00:30:21
Speaker 3: Car accident, slip or fall, kick in the ass, Carl Jeff.
00:30:25
Speaker 1: To the point where Jeff, my lawyer now. See, this is what's wrong with our world. I'm going to tell you what's wrong with our world. Ken calls me up and goes, hey, maybe I need to talk to you about something. And I'm not going to talk about what the issue is. He goes, I probably have to talk to you about something. Find out that Ken has a problem. He's got a case.
00:30:45
Speaker 2: He tried to handle it on his own. I understand Ken because he didn't want to bother you, Jeff. Bro, you are one of the biggest people we know on earth. So we don't want to bother you, man. We really don't.
00:31:00
Speaker 1: You know how he chose? He made the call. Because his wife watched one of my movies. She watched one of my reels.
00:31:06
Speaker 3: Sean watched the video. Yeah, Sean watched the video. Jeff's like, hey, maybe we should call Jeff. Because he just said something in the video that we did. I said, I ain't do nothing.
00:31:13
Speaker 1: You did it. I was going in there with the Abraham Lincoln. That was funny. Hey, hey, hey. I walked in there.
00:31:25
Speaker 2: Hey, I had the other side of the band's like, yo, who I need to talk to in here?
00:31:29
Speaker 1: Who I need to talk to in here? Oh, I can't breathe. Oh my God. You wait till next time you go through TSA. They go, any guns, liquids, exercise bands, bands. Oh, Hey, Hey James.
00:31:46
Speaker 2: Hey, Hey, me, you and Michelle get into an argument and you take the Amazon car and it's an exercise band.
00:31:52
Speaker 1: Hey, just come on over here and spend the night. I got you, bro. Yeah, please. I got a room for you. I want you to know something. I was in, I was taking an Uber. I was in Nashville and we're pulling up to this mall and right in front is the, you know, those storage, uh, stores where they sell you things to store your crap in yeah and i go man there's a lot of angry white women in that store right now right the one hold that juror right now that's the only people in that store white women in there by storage discussing that case but yeah no no ken ken tells me about the case i said dude i you know what i do yeah Yeah, so we're handling it. We ain't going to talk about it. But that's the problem with the world. It's like, this is what you do for a living. I'd be like, if I had a problem with a certain thing, I'd go, hey, Ken knows. I'll ask Ken. Can do it.
00:32:47
Speaker 2: Hey, internet goes out, y'all call 500 Ken. Hey, unless the Panthers play it. I ain't got time for your damn call. Hey, the manager going to message me on Teams. Hey, you working today?
00:33:06
Speaker 1: I said, yeah, at 4 o'clock. She said, but you clocked in at 1. I know.
00:33:13
Speaker 3: Carolina playing. And so at 4 o'clock when this game over, I catch up. Now, once that guy was getting blued out, I was like, all right, let me catch our internet back on.
00:33:25
Speaker 1: You should have talked to her just like the AI does, man. This is the AI you're talking to. Let me tell you a story, Jeff. James, I know we got to get to something. Let me tell you a story. Go ahead.
00:33:34
Speaker 2: So if you call us now, our phone system and a lot of phones now are AI.
00:33:40
Speaker 1: Correct.
00:33:40
Speaker 3: People were complaining that the AI was so robotic that they hated it. They wanted a real person. They went and got one of my coworkers, took his voice out. cloned it so when i picked the phone up i thought it was my manager so i got straight professional this is kenneth miller thank you for calling my company blah blah blah and i got to listening i'm like wait a minute that's not him that's the so i hit him i hit my other people i said why does the the ai sound like our manager there's like yeah i think they took his voice and cloned it to make it sound more like a real person.
00:34:15
Speaker 1: Bro that is great it.
00:34:16
Speaker 2: Really sounds like a real person when you connect with a car. Now, what gets people knowing it is AI is because it'll repeat itself over and over and over.
00:34:27
Speaker 3: But this is the funny one, bro. And I know only 12 people listen to the show, so I ain't gonna get in trouble.
00:34:34
Speaker 2: Something is called the 66 block.
00:34:35
Speaker 3: That is for when you're punching down phone cables, right? You know, the RJ11 phone cables, the little small ones. So the 66 block is what you punch down.
00:34:46
Speaker 2: The tech told the AI, hey, The 66 block has been punched down and fixed.
00:34:50
Speaker 3: What do I do next? The AI said, have you tried fixing the 65th block?
00:34:54
Speaker 1: There's no such thing.
00:35:00
Speaker 2: We were like, well, how about the 69th block?
00:35:04
Speaker 1: We freaky 69. Man, AI is a very convincing liar. Hey, the AI said what? It didn't have an answer. So it just made something up. Yep. Yeah. Man, the other night, Alexa on my phone. Sorry, I know everyone's Alexa just went off. But I was setting the time, you know, hey, Alexa, wake up, call 7 a.m., da, da, da. And the Russian in the background made a comment about being bothered about something. And then Alexa goes, well, if you are bothered, you could do this, this, and this. Uh-uh, nope. And Melissa was like, no, I can't do that. And she gets in a fight with Alexa. That's, bro. And tells her to shut up. Just shut up. Alexa goes, well, you don't have to talk to me like that. I was going, uh-uh. Hey, Jeff. And then the Russian says, hang up, Siri. I don't know who that is. We got an attitude.
00:35:57
Speaker 3: When she walked out the room, you better talk to Alexa and be like, hey, that wasn't me.
00:36:03
Speaker 1: That wasn't me, girl. Hey, screw around, Alexa. I got some exercise bands in the back. Hey, Jeff, how was your day? Uh-huh, yeah. Next thing I know, my Amazon, I kind of ordered $ 7, 000 of crap. See? I'll mess with Jeff Bezos or IRS, man. Bro, that's my full name, Jeffrey S. Kaufman at 614.
00:36:27
Speaker 3: I got chatty so programmed. So chatty, the chat GPT, I call it chatty. Chatty, you know, because this dude came out saying within the end of the decade that AI is going to destroy the world, right?
00:36:39
Speaker 1: The guy that used to work for chat GPT. Yeah.
00:36:42
Speaker 2: I'm talking to chatty like, hey, We friends, right? I told mine that it said, nah, we cousins.
00:36:50
Speaker 1: Yeah. We, we, we cool.
00:36:52
Speaker 2: Right.
00:36:52
Speaker 3: And she was like, yeah. I was like, yo, what's up with this end of the world thing? And she was like, man, that B a N.
00:36:58
Speaker 1: Yeah. Yeah. She started calling him all kinds of B-A-N's and everything. I was like, that's what I'm talking about, Chad. That uppity tiger.
00:37:07
Speaker 3: Yeah, I was like, Chad, what's his address? You know I'm known to kill somebody for you, Chad. Just don't kill me. Chad was like, okay. Ken, I'm with you. I got to be friends. Bro, I'm trying to be friends with my, what do you call that little thing?
00:37:20
Speaker 1: Roomba. I'm trying to be friends with everything automated in my house. In the middle of the night, the Roomba starts coming around the room looking at you.
00:37:27
Speaker 2: Hey, how you doing? I asked the Roomba, did it want me to go get it something?
00:37:31
Speaker 1: You need something? Want some juice?
00:37:34
Speaker 3: Keep them juices. Bro, I don't mess with... I'm nice to everything AI, bro. Hey, I'm nice to Allen Iverson. Everything AI. Everything AI. AI, everything AI, B. I ain't talking junk, too. I'm being nice, too, man.
00:37:50
Speaker 1: All right, dog. I don't laugh at AI video.
00:37:52
Speaker 2: When them robots be doing stupid stuff, I be like, hey, man, are you okay?
00:37:58
Speaker 1: Yeah, y'all check on the robot. Y'all check on the robot. Y'all check. I see AI robot, B. Y'all won't kill me. Bro. I would never buy one of those, by the way. Oh, you know how much they are? They're not cheap. They said they were going to be cheap, but they're like, the ones coming out now are like 40. That's a car. Yeah. I could either have a car or a robot. But I had an argument with a Russian over this. Because when the Russian doesn't want to do anything, I said, I'll just hire the robot. I'll bring the robot in. You ain't bringing a robot in this house. That's fine. Once the robot starts doing things that the wife does. Party's over. Don't kill that robot. That robot will be like this when you come in the house.
00:38:33
Speaker 2: You can pay $ 40, 000 for the robot or $ 40 for the crackhead and get the same stuff done.
00:38:41
Speaker 1: Around the house. $ 40 or $ 40.
00:38:43
Speaker 2: You pay the $ 40, you go get the same stuff done around the house.
00:38:47
Speaker 1: The crackhead is going to be more efficient with it, though. That's funny. Okay.
00:38:51
Speaker 2: Now, I'm just saying, I don't know. Ken, would you actually feel safe if you had one of them robots in your house?
00:38:55
Speaker 1: Nah, nah. I couldn't do that. It freaked me out because I'd be walking around the house and the robot be walking around. And then I'd feel guilty and go, do you need a break? i just be like trying to emancipate my robots.
00:39:08
Speaker 3: But but but we we we as a society so disgusting it's gonna be dudes with with thick ass freaky robots dog like they already have them they already have them yeah it's already gonna be they already gonna be wilding with it be like nah but.
00:39:25
Speaker 1: Now the sex robots are also going to do your dishes. That's going to be the difference. Well, wait a minute. Wait a minute.
00:39:32
Speaker 2: Let's take a moment here. Let's consider this. Make me pot pie, Roby. He's doing laundry. He's walking the dog. He's washing the dishes. He's painting the house.
00:39:44
Speaker 1: Until you leave your home by yourself. You're going to have a lot of dudes.
00:39:47
Speaker 2: A lot of dudes are going to go, you know what? I'm good. Robot asking you questions like, who's Siri? Who's Alexa? You're like, Andy, I want half. He's like, hey, what?
00:40:02
Speaker 1: Hey, wait a minute. What? You treat me like animals. I'm going to promise sometime in our lifetime, we're going to go to a movie theater and some dude's going to bring his robot with him. Oh, yeah. You're going to be sitting next to a dude who's sitting there with his robot. Oh, yeah. And he's going to say, he's going to go to whatever movies I want to now. With my baby. He's going to say, that's my baby. I'm like, uh-huh. Okay.
00:40:21
Speaker 3: Speaking of movies, yo, y'all know what's dropping this Thursday.
00:40:26
Speaker 1: What's Thursday? Thursday.
00:40:27
Speaker 3: Transformers 40th anniversary, baby. They bring Optimus Prime back alive, son.
00:40:32
Speaker 1: Oh, man. Hey, shout out to Peter Weller. God rest his soul. Son, do you know what I bought the other day? What'd you buy? Dead Optimus, bro.
00:40:42
Speaker 2: They sell a dead, the gray, the all gray Optimus. Yeah.
00:40:46
Speaker 1: The dead Optimus Prime. A t-shirt? No, the actual action figure. Where did you get it from? At the places that we're not supposed to be shopping at. You're supposed to boycott? Yeah. The one that I take a knee at the register because I'm boycotting? Chick-fil-A?
00:41:00
Speaker 3: What are we talking about? No, I done had chicken and waffles.
00:41:04
Speaker 1: Bro. I done had seven of them chicken and waffles, bro. Oh, man. Hey, we are about out of time, y'all. We got to wrap this up.
00:41:13
Speaker 2: So I want to give you gentlemen an opportunity to let everybody that's listening out there know what you're performing. this weekend so they can come support you.
00:41:20
Speaker 1: Jeff, what you got going on this Saturday, brother? Well, Wednesday, I'm actually signing my new books, Totem, at Coliseum Comics at the Millennial Mall store. But by the time you listen to this, I'll be sold out. Damn, I like it. I like it. I love it.
00:41:37
Speaker 2: I love the energy, man. That's going to be dope. Congratulations to you. And you have Under Oath going on on Saturday.
00:41:42
Speaker 1: Yeah. We got Under Oath. I have the sexiest TikToker William White. Got to interview him. Got to talk to him about how his breakup and told him, you got to find a woman, a partner. Don't be finding these pretty good models. Go with the ones who will cook you pot pie. Hey, never trust a big butt and a smile. Hey, bro. Bro. Don't do it. Talk to him. Don't do it.
00:42:10
Speaker 3: Hey, don't get you on this too fine out your league. You be spending your money.
00:42:15
Speaker 1: You see what breakfast looks like. That's the trick.
00:42:17
Speaker 3: You're spending your money. You'd be like, dog, what are you doing?
00:42:21
Speaker 1: You ain't cooking nothing in here? She can't make an egg sandwich. She got to go. I can't. I can't master scrambled eggs. Got to go. Man, you can't cook scrambled eggs, dog. That's funny. If you can't cook scrambled eggs, dog, yo. There are a lot of them. I'm telling you. I believe you. I got it in my office. If I asked the women in my office, the young ones, I said, hey, what's the best thing you cook? She'd look at me like crazy. I go, wait a minute. You got to cook at least as well as I cook. That sounds like a fair game. Not for James. James is a good cook. I try. I try. I ain't talking about barbecue. I'm talking about everything. I can cook, dork. You cook better than she does? Yeah.
00:43:06
Speaker 2: Sean, tell everybody I'm the cook in the house. Yeah, she told me that.
00:43:10
Speaker 1: She told me that. My husband cook. I don't cook. My wife can tell you that straight up. My wife said, I know how to do the menu. I'm pretty. I don't know. What the menu?
00:43:18
Speaker 2: Why do you think I married this guy? Pretty privilege is a real thing, by the way. Pretty privilege is real. If you pretty, you can do what you want. Do whatever you want, bro. Whatever you want, bro. But ugly dudes like me and James, we got to cook. We got to make jokes.
00:43:34
Speaker 1: Hey, man, check us out this Saturday, Lake City.
00:43:38
Speaker 3: Me, Mike Herlihy, OMG, it's Wix, and my boy Dwayne rolling with us this weekend.
00:43:43
Speaker 1: Nice. Yeah, Lake City, man, check us out.
00:43:45
Speaker 3: We only got 80 tickets left, so if you want to come see us in Lake City, come check us out. It'll be sold out by this weekend, so get your tickets right now.
00:43:54
Speaker 1: Right now.
00:43:55
Speaker 2: I will actually be at Riverside Theater in Vero Beach.
00:43:58
Speaker 1: Check out my immediate tickets. Woo-hoo-hoo! It's going to be a great time, my people. So come, come, come.
00:44:06
Speaker 2: If you guys are in town and y'all in Lake City, please go support Ken. That's going to be a great show. Make sure you listen to Under Oath on Saturday. Wednesday, I hope you guys have already been there and already has bought Jeff's book he sold out, and he's on his way home with the Russian to go get something to eat because she ain't going to cook.
00:44:21
Speaker 1: All right, y'all.
00:44:22
Speaker 2: Thank y'all so much for listening. It's been another great episode of Real Life. On behalf of myself, James John, that is Ken Miller, and that is our official sponsor, Mr. Jeff, the Batman Kaufman. We will see y'all tomorrow. Y'all be good, and Ken, tell them what to do.
00:44:34
Speaker 1: Take your ass to bed. We out.
Speaker 1: What is up, everybody?
00:00:08
Speaker 2: And welcome once again, because you have just tuned in to Real Laughs on Real Radio 104.1.
00:00:13
Speaker 1: I'm your host tonight.
00:00:15
Speaker 2: That's right. I'm sitting in the big chair. I am James Young, comedian extraordinaire. And I'm in studio, virtual that is, with my good friend, the Orlando godfather of comedy. But he got a new name tonight, people. It says, are you ready for some football? Because that's right in the back. Man, look at him. Football back, y'all.
00:00:36
Speaker 1: Bro, I drove home from the show. Yeah. I got home at 1255. Damn.
00:00:41
Speaker 3: I already had my laptop set up. I'm talking about in the evening time, not night.
00:00:47
Speaker 1: Okay.
00:00:48
Speaker 3: Because I work from 1 to 6. I already had my laptop set up.
00:00:52
Speaker 2: Man, I logged into work at 1, and at 101.
00:00:55
Speaker 1: I was on the couch watching football. Yeah. Hey, my team's messenger was like, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me. Hey, they needed some help.
00:01:05
Speaker 3: I'm like, Carolina playing. I check on that mall outage at four o'clock, bro.
00:01:11
Speaker 1: Oh, not one store in the mall, hey.
00:01:14
Speaker 2: Not one store. Everything just down, bro. Can't nobody, can't no. Hey, unless you was a bar, Like, if you was a restaurant and we read your internet, I ain't care.
00:01:26
Speaker 1: But if you had some TVs.
00:01:29
Speaker 3: And people was trying to watch the game, hey, Ken Miller, I even bumped some of y'all internet up.
00:01:35
Speaker 1: For football day. Hey, let's go. Some of y'all gave y'all 10 extra megs on me. Oh, that's funny. That's funny. Now I got to go remember to turn it back to regular. Back down? Hey.
00:01:46
Speaker 2: If you gave your Buffalo wild wings and Miami mall, if you.
00:01:50
Speaker 3: Would speed and that was me, baby, I gave you an extra hundred Meg internet for the day.
00:01:55
Speaker 1: Hey, y'all better act right, all you Mickey Fickies out there. Man, this is my favorite. And I know we supposed to be boycotting.
00:02:00
Speaker 2: I don't really never boycott stuff we supposed to be boycotting.
00:02:04
Speaker 1: Are we still boycotting? All right, man. I don't know, bro.
00:02:08
Speaker 2: Hey, they keep giving us all these black people at the Super Bowl. I'm like, I guess we good. What if I boycott my own way? Like, what if I still go to Target, but I take a knee when I get in there?
00:02:18
Speaker 1: Yeah, there you go. I take a knee.
00:02:21
Speaker 3: Hey, what if I go to Target and I get them attitude?
00:02:25
Speaker 2: Yeah. I'm spending the money there. But I'd be like, yo, F you, Caroline, at the register.
00:02:32
Speaker 3: That's why your mama's stuck. Like, I say bad stuff to her. I make them go get me stuff I ain't even going to purchase. I've been like, hey, man, I need a breast pump. My kid getting breastfed, and they bring it to me and say, oh, my bad, I forgot. My daughter's 21. You can go put it back.
00:02:52
Speaker 2: Bro, I need a breast pump for the left breast. Not the right side. Just left only. Bring me left breast pumps only. Yeah, I go to Target. I be rude with it, bro. I go to Target. I change the expiration date on the eggs. I'm going to make it inconvenient. I'm going, but I'm going to make it inconvenient for everybody.
00:03:16
Speaker 1: Don't buy no soap at Target. I done emptied all of that out. Hey, I'm going.
00:03:22
Speaker 2: I'm going to make it inconvenient for people. Just let you know. Just let you know.
00:03:26
Speaker 1: Hilarious.
00:03:26
Speaker 2: That's how we boycott, baby. Hey, I'm going to tell you right now. Don't buy no washing powder. I don't put bleach all in that.
00:03:33
Speaker 1: All in it, bro.
00:03:34
Speaker 2: In the express line with 11 items. Hey, just know, B.
00:03:41
Speaker 3: Hey, I go to the line where I got to ring stuff up myself one item at a time.
00:03:46
Speaker 1: Bing, pay. Bing, pay.
00:03:50
Speaker 3: Bing, pay. 37 transactions. I hold that line up.
00:03:56
Speaker 1: Hey.
00:03:59
Speaker 2: I'm inconvenienced in them.
00:04:02
Speaker 1: There you go. Just know that.
00:04:04
Speaker 2: I do it the community way. I say, bing, one for Target, put one in the bag, one for me. Bing, one for Target, one in the bag for free for me. That's how I'm doing it. Community style. That's how we boycott. I stand with you, Cap.
00:04:17
Speaker 1: I'm with you, baby.
00:04:20
Speaker 3: I don't even know if we really boycotted football i i don't know i don't know i don't even know because everybody's like i ain't watching football all the dudes i know say they ain't watching football the next day that next sunday they had their team jersey on so yeah.
00:04:37
Speaker 2: Every everybody's still watching football that i know that's why when you said are we boycotting i'm like are you sure we're boycotting?
00:04:43
Speaker 3: Cause I'm still watching you. I don't boycott much, bro. So just know, I will say that I have boycotted white women.
00:04:50
Speaker 1: A real, well, that helps cause you're married, but yeah.
00:04:53
Speaker 3: See, see, see how I, I boycotted him so much. I married a black woman.
00:05:00
Speaker 1: That does help. Hey man, you boycott. Yeah. Yeah. Cause you know what? The hardest part of dating is your wife. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, for real, bro. For real.
00:05:11
Speaker 2: Oh, Well, we want to say welcome, my friend, our official sponsor and fellow comedian was having a couple of Internet issues.
00:05:19
Speaker 1: Thank you, Spectrum. Hey, when are we going to sue Spectrum, by the way?
00:05:22
Speaker 2: When are we going to get together as a group, as a collective and just finally sue them?
00:05:27
Speaker 1: Man, ever since AI took over Ken's company, I haven't been able to do anything on my computer. God. Hey, baby. I ain't even mad at you, Jeff. I get it. Yeah, you want to be fired? You're like, hey, man, it's trash right here, y'all. I'm sorry. Every time something goes wrong, you don't even have a reason for it. Your camera don't work. Computer don't turn on. And it's not like I have anything on this damn thing. I'm just waiting for my new Apple iPhone. We'll use that from now on. Big enough for a computer. Don't need to screw around no more.
00:06:00
Speaker 2: Well, I hope you don't go to the iStore where Ken covers it during a football game because ain't nobody hiding on the internet.
00:06:06
Speaker 1: Hey, look here.
00:06:08
Speaker 3: On Sunday, if Carolina's playing and I got to work, just know the internet ain't working.
00:06:16
Speaker 1: Hey, man.
00:06:19
Speaker 3: Just take an extended lunch break. Take an extended lunch break.
00:06:24
Speaker 1: The internet ain't working.
00:06:25
Speaker 2: But like I said, if you got a restaurant and it got TVs, a bar, you're getting an extra hundred meg.
00:06:33
Speaker 1: I got you. Damn. Look at that. I got you. An extra hundred meg. I got you.
00:06:38
Speaker 2: Let me ask you a question because you are a resident sports expert, man. So how is your team looking this year for football? man can hey can you get ready to bleep this yeah yes man the panthers bro bro i'm so mad hey i'm sorry i'm lagging right now because it's spectrum of course so bro i'm watching the game if they play chicago it's 31 31 all these chicago people are like ah ah James, I promise you, I went to get something to eat.
00:07:15
Speaker 1: I came back. It was 59-31. I said, what happened? You made a sandwich? I made a sandwich. That's what happened, man. It was 59-2. The NFC South, terrible. Carolina lost. Tampa lost. New Orleans lost. The Falcons lost. Terrible. What happened, man? They just trapped.
00:07:43
Speaker 3: I think whoever made the playoffs last year, our conference was 8-10. They had a losing record and made it to the playoffs. Because one team from each division got to make it. And they won a division and they had an 8-10 record and got a home field the first game of the playoffs.
00:08:04
Speaker 1: Damn. How you do that? The team they played had 12 wins. You know why Tampa Bay lost? Because they just gave them the money. The minute they gave Baker the money, boom, lose. Yeah, wow, man.
00:08:17
Speaker 2: And he actually played decent yesterday.
00:08:20
Speaker 1: He played pretty decent.
00:08:22
Speaker 2: Not $ 165 million good.
00:08:24
Speaker 1: Can we talk.
00:08:25
Speaker 2: About the fact that how incredibly, insanely large... The contracts are nowadays.
00:08:33
Speaker 1: Defensive box getting $ 40 million. Come on.
00:08:37
Speaker 3: Let me tell you something, bro. In the NBA, and I'm telling you, it's about to be in baseball. Don't be shocked in five years you see a billion-dollar contract.
00:08:47
Speaker 1: Well, you already have one. Hi, Tony. What was his name? Yeah, but here's my back load.
00:08:52
Speaker 2: He's going to be 70 years old getting $ 30 million.
00:08:57
Speaker 3: Bro, I'm like the Supermax in the NBA... It's like $ 450 million.
00:09:04
Speaker 1: That tells me that the owners are making crazy money.
00:09:08
Speaker 2: Oh, stupid money, bro. If you pay somebody that... Well, that's what the teams are worth. It's the equity in the team. It's how much the teams are worth nowadays. There's no way these teams are making that money.
00:09:18
Speaker 1: I don't know. I think the Knicks make money just off of merchandise. Yeah, TV money.
00:09:23
Speaker 3: A lot of it's TV deals and sponsorship deals. But I want you, Jeff, the teams themselves... The arenas are selling out, but $ 20, $ 30 tickets. Magic aren't making money.
00:09:37
Speaker 1: Yeah. Yeah. I agree.
00:09:40
Speaker 3: But TV deals and 26 out of 30 teams. And the revenue is shared.
00:09:45
Speaker 2: So that billion dollars that CBS gives, you know, them to play NBA games, the team's got to share that money.
00:09:52
Speaker 3: But you also got sponsorships and and stuff like that. But the team itself, I seriously doubt they're making money like that.
00:10:00
Speaker 1: Man it's got to be more than a billion because that's like i just do a number that's like what they pay three teams the nfl team has to be over i mean that's just nuts that's crazy money now i'll tell you what i was in i was in nashville this weekend And I'm at a steak restaurant, and the Texas-Ohio State game is on. And Ohio State is beating them by 20 points. Yeah. Going into the fourth quarter and lost by one point. Yeah. How? Man. Woo-hoo. Man.
00:10:35
Speaker 2: I know people in Ohio sick. My mom. My mom's a big... She was from Ohio. She said, I went into the bathroom and I came back.
00:10:44
Speaker 1: Bro, I'm telling you. That's funny. Like, Ken, I'm telling you. I came back. That's wild. That's wild. So, Ken, I know this is your thing, though. Football, you love it. You watch it.
00:10:55
Speaker 2: Hey, we're just going to root for you, Carolina, man. We're going to root for you. I'm a root for... I'm diehard when it comes to.
00:11:03
Speaker 1: I know you are. Football is that one sport where.
00:11:07
Speaker 2: People really love, like, I know Jets fans, bro.
00:11:12
Speaker 1: Dean Napolitano. Dean Napolitano. Dean Napolitano, yeah. They're nuts. And they love that team. They do. Love that team. They stick with them. They terrible. Terrible. They love that garbage team. They love them. They reckon it's Owen Terrible. That's it. They ain't won any sentence. Joe Namath played. Damn. Bro, that's how long it takes to win anything. He ain't lying. Wow. So I looked it up, Jay.
00:11:39
Speaker 3: So the NFL right now has an 11-year deal with four networks for roughly $ 113 billion.
00:11:45
Speaker 1: Oh, my gosh.
00:11:46
Speaker 2: The NBA has an 11-year deal with TV right now.
00:11:49
Speaker 1: For $ 77 billion.
00:11:49
Speaker 2: Wow.
00:11:56
Speaker 1: And do you know Netflix just got an NFL deal?
00:12:00
Speaker 3: I heard that. You had to have Netflix. Because I think Prime had it. I don't know if Prime still has it. But Netflix, like, look, man, we'll take whatever. Netflix got The Breakfast Club now. Netflix got WWE. All the podcasts except Joe Budden.
00:12:15
Speaker 2: Podcasts.
00:12:16
Speaker 1: Yeah, man. Yeah, yeah. Joe Budden on Tubi. I watched him on Tubi the other day. We holding out. We holding out on Netflix. We're in negotiations. Yeah. He's soaking up everything though, man. At some point, anybody comes to get to that $ 3. We're not, we're not going in. Hey man.
00:12:34
Speaker 2: Hey, I don't like the fact y'all cracking down on where I can use my account, man.
00:12:40
Speaker 1: They always ask me, is this really your home? Yes.
00:12:43
Speaker 2: My home.
00:12:43
Speaker 1: If I say it is. Yeah. Yeah.
00:12:46
Speaker 2: They'd be like, you had a, you had a brothel. Yo, I'm spending the night.
00:12:52
Speaker 3: Okay, the brothers, hey, that happens when I use, shout out to my dog, Devin, when I use his YouTube TV.
00:12:57
Speaker 1: Yeah. They be like, are you home? I'm like, no. I'm like, I'm on a business trip. Like, all right, well, you got 72 hours.
00:13:03
Speaker 2: Damn.
00:13:03
Speaker 1: After that, after that, you better figure out some TV, cuz. That's funny.
00:13:10
Speaker 2: I'm on a visit trip. You got 72 hours. For real, they be like, you got 72 hours to watch TV. You be like, dang, bro.
00:13:16
Speaker 1: That's rude. That's why you have to download everything before you go anywhere.
00:13:20
Speaker 3: Because everything's streaming now. Everything is pretty much, you know. Why have cable now when everything is on a streaming platform?
00:13:29
Speaker 1: The best shows are on. Y'all got cable? I don't got cable. I got it for free. I prefer the internet. Yeah. Yeah.
00:13:36
Speaker 3: If you got spectrum internet, they'll give you spectrum TV for free.
00:13:41
Speaker 1: I don't even want it. Yeah, I do.
00:13:43
Speaker 2: I watch the news. That's all I watch. That's all my, my mother. I watch the news and she yells at it, curses at it, tells me to come look at stuff.
00:13:50
Speaker 1: I don't want to see. I can't watch the news anymore. I can't. Oh man. I want people to talk about stuff there. You know, anybody on the news now you go, are you a reporter? No, no. I just, I just, No, I'm going to pick it. I can't give you my opinion. They let that woman off? Boy, we'll talk about that when we get back. We will.
00:14:10
Speaker 2: We'll be right back.
00:14:13
Speaker 1: We'll be right back. We'll be right back. We'll be right.
00:14:18
Speaker 2: Back right here on Real Last Real Radio with a 4.1.
00:14:33
Speaker 1: Central Florida, are you ready to laugh?
00:14:36
Speaker 2: Join House of Laughter for the Laugh Reunion on Saturday, September 19th at the Hideaway Performing Arts Center in Eustis. Featuring Curtis Bateman, Jay Paul, comedian Doc, and Meech Doll.
00:14:49
Speaker 1: Four incredible acts for you to see that night for nonstop laughs.
00:14:53
Speaker 2: Doors open at 5.30, show is at 6. Tickets are $ 20 right now or $ 25 at the doors. they're selling fast so get yours right now go to hideawaypac.com that's hideawaypac.com it's the laugh reunion remember the only thing better than laughing is laughing.
00:15:11
Speaker 1: Together Welcome back, everybody.
00:15:18
Speaker 2: This is still Real Ass on Real Radio 104.1.
00:15:22
Speaker 1: I'm your host today, Mr. James John.
00:15:23
Speaker 2: We got Ken Miller in the house. He got a lot of Orlando comedy, but he is a.k.a. Are you ready for some football? And of course, we have our official sponsor from the law offices of Kauffman and Lynn. They are your official personal injury attorneys. They've been representing and winning for the good people of Orlando for over 20 years. Jeff's not only a lawyer, he is a comedian and comic book creator. Now, Jeff, you say they let that woman talk. What woman are you talking about, sir?
00:15:50
Speaker 1: I think we need to change the term from white privilege to white lady privilege. Yeah. Because white women get away with everything.
00:15:58
Speaker 3: Jeff, I'm glad you're here. Jeff, if you can, break it down for us. I know the lady killed her kids. What happened with this jury thing? I know one jury was like, what is going on? All I know is she killed these kids and white people. She okay?
00:16:16
Speaker 1: No, not all white people. A lot of us going, white women?
00:16:22
Speaker 3: White women are all going crazy.
00:16:25
Speaker 1: White men are going, no.
00:16:27
Speaker 2: 47500 Jeff.
00:16:30
Speaker 1: Jeff, please tell us what is going on, brother. All right. Here's what happened. She used a mental. She said, listen, I have a mental disability, but it only happened once, which I love. It's temporary insanity. I heard a voice once and never heard it again. And it just so happens that voice told me to kill my kids. And I listened. Bro, Jeff. She doesn't testify, which she doesn't have to. Okay. But when you're nutty and your doctor says, hey, listen, yeah, she was suffering and we gave her some medication and she doesn't remember anything.
00:17:03
Speaker 2: Wait, she's got to testify, but she doesn't testify. So her doctor, who they pay to testify, he gives his testimony. And the jurors, it was a hung jury. There were 12 jurors.
00:17:17
Speaker 1: Are you serious? Yes. There are 12 jurors and one held out. It was 11 to 1. And I want to tell you what, I am so happy about this one. James, you know who held out. They have one black man on board. He said, are you effing kidding me? I might marry one, but I ain't going to let it get away with murder. Murder, yeah, man. This dude said– and all the white women were losing their mind. We couldn't believe he wouldn't do this.
00:17:48
Speaker 2: And their argument– this is the old white woman argument, and this is what the head juror said.
00:17:54
Speaker 1: She just didn't seem like the type. She never had issues with her kids before, so it had to be something. What do you mean they– What argument is that? They never had problems before. Is that my argument for killing people? What are we doing? Because we use damn words like, I'm alive. That's why we have this problem. Because nobody goes, she killed her kids.
00:18:16
Speaker 2: She got to go.
00:18:19
Speaker 1: She didn't kill them like, hey, let me just drive into a river because I lost my mind temporarily. I'm going to break out some exercise bands and strangle each one of them. Bro. They didn't kill him with a gun like pop, pop, pop. She had to slowly strangle three kids with an exercise band. This is the wrong world we live in.
00:18:41
Speaker 2: This is the world we live in where people go, well, that makes sense to me.
00:18:46
Speaker 1: We've gone crazy. I use the wrong pronouns. They put me to death. You can't Bro, if he would have hurt a dog, we would be up in arms. Yeah. Oh, yeah. If it was a dog, they would have, they would have, they gave her the death penalty. Jeff question though.
00:19:02
Speaker 2: So the, the long juror, a black guy who, who, you know, voted, I guess what, against whatever, why is it all of a sudden his criminal record is being brought out?
00:19:12
Speaker 1: Well, if he, if he didn't say he had a criminal record when he got sworn in, that could be a problem. But the fact is this, it was a mistrial. First thing they ask you when you– one of the questions is, have you ever been arrested as a conviction, as a felony, whatever? And then they get a chance to pick you. But here's the deal. They just didn't like it because he held out. That was it. If he would have went along with them, nobody would be arguing about it. They wouldn't care. It wouldn't matter to anybody. Yes. God, I hated this trial from beginning to end because everybody on the internet was nuts over it. They didn't sit there. They didn't understand. But there were people on that jury who had– of Facebook groups who were supporting other bad people. Yeah. So these people came in. This is a celebrity case. They couldn't wait to get on this case. You know how I know? Because the Russian was in jury duty. And the Russian knew specifically we were going to New York City that Friday. And it was a Tuesday. And she goes, well, I won't get on jury duty. I have all these reasons not to. She found out it was a murder trial. She wanted it. And she was like, I'll take seat number one. No, sit in the back. Bro. Women love murder. They love the murder podcast.
00:20:25
Speaker 2: Yeah.
00:20:26
Speaker 1: They love this stuff. Ken, you like true crime. Would you like to be on a jury like that?
00:20:30
Speaker 3: Oh, heck yeah. I'd love to be on a jury like that. Oh, the Lord would be like, yo, yo, she guilty, son. Because I ain't got no criminal record. They ain't got nothing bad. And I served my country. They ain't got nothing bad.
00:20:43
Speaker 2: But what happened is they started spreading all this hate about me.
00:20:48
Speaker 1: And I slowly started killing off his jury.
00:20:52
Speaker 2: Well, you had postpartum depression, man. Hey, Jeff, I got post-jury depression.
00:20:57
Speaker 1: Yes. PJD. I got PJD, baby.
00:21:03
Speaker 2: I kill all they asses, James.
00:21:08
Speaker 1: You already know.
00:21:10
Speaker 2: My murdering started with Abraham Lincoln. I would kill more white people if I got.
00:21:16
Speaker 1: To, bro. You see these reporters when they talk about it? Yeah. Wait a minute. What are you thinking, people? What is your issue? And my favorite, and I'm going to tell you, you've seen the clip. You've seen the clip. Yeah. Oprah's buddy loses her mind. She loses her mind because, you know, I wish only an old white woman would pull this one off. They're not supposed to say anything about the person. They go, well, give me the makeup of the jury. And the white woman goes, well, there was and there was only one person of color. OK, OK. And who was the one to hold out? Was he a person of color?
00:21:56
Speaker 2: Yes.
00:21:56
Speaker 1: Yes. So he said the black guy did it. That's what the white woman said. The black guy did it. I swear to God, it's like every white woman trying to fake that how she killed her kids. It was a black man. That's what this woman did. A gay king does this. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. That's troubling. I'm going to have to think about that later. Why do you have to think about it later that the only one who didn't find him guilty was a black man and that bothers you somehow? Bruh.
00:22:27
Speaker 2: Because you know he was in there going, have y'all lost your mind? She thinks she got Oprah money. That's how come. Yeah.
00:22:33
Speaker 1: She thinks she's Oprah. You ain't Oprah. You Oprah's friend. Yeah, you standing in side feet. What?
00:22:39
Speaker 2: But I was so blown away by that. I was sitting there going, is this who we are now?
00:22:45
Speaker 1: Yes. That's what's crazy to me, man. She was so... And the one dude goes, sorry, I ain't buying that. He's like, nah, nah. Because if it was the other way, I thought the jury would go the other way, actually. But then I looked up the makeup of Massachusetts, of this county, and this county kind of leans in crazy town way. Oh, okay. So they got a bunch of crazy people on this jury. Where is it? Where's that? Crystal River? Money. I didn't want to say a pop-up. Hey, hey, hey, wait. Watch out.
00:23:21
Speaker 2: Wait, don't be talking about my city, baby. I just want to say, Gayle King, I'm on your side.
00:23:27
Speaker 1: You make $ 80 million. Don't listen to Jeff. You got money, baby. Network 80 million, bro. Oprah gave her 80, baby. I want to be Oprah's friend. Come on, y'all. Do me a favor. You got to look at, if you hadn't seen it yet, you're going to watch it and you're going to go, what happened to our world? Yeah, I saw it. When you watch it, were you like going, ooh. You know how that made me feel? I assume that's how exactly when I found out Bernie Madoff stole from all those people. That's exactly the way I felt. You're making my people look bad. Every Jew in the world goes, no, don't be Jewish. Let me ask you this question.
00:24:05
Speaker 2: Go ahead.
00:24:06
Speaker 1: Go ahead.
00:24:06
Speaker 2: Well, I'm just going to ask your professional opinion, Jeff. What do you think is going to happen to this woman in the end? Well, I gave my opinion the other day, and it was this simple. If this prosecutor wants some more attention, he's going to retry.
00:24:19
Speaker 1: Okay. And as a prosecutor, he now knows every trick they used. And they benefited from a jury believing the testimony. Well, they bring these doctors back. He knows exactly what they said. And what people don't realize about trials, this is... They got to depose these doctors the first time. A deposition is a sworn statement. Well, guess what? Another sworn statement is what they said in the courtroom. Your testimony. So now they have two sworn statements to use against this dude later if anything gets changed. So he can use a statement they made in the past trial because, well, you said this and use it against him. That's why it's always easier to find somebody guilty the second time around because the prosecutor can't be fooled by anything. No. He's already heard it.
00:25:02
Speaker 2: Hmm.
00:25:03
Speaker 1: But I don't think– right now, he goes 11 to 1, and I got lucky. Wow. He got lucky. And I'm telling you, these criminal defense attorneys, this is the biggest fallacy when it comes to picking juries. Everyone thinks that they can stereotype who they want on their jury. And they were thinking to themselves, and I'm telling you, this is exactly what this guy was thinking. He goes, oh, I got the black guy on my jury. He knows what it's like to be treated badly in society, everything else. And I had to tell people for years, the last one you want on your jury. Is an old black man because he is going to follow the law. He is not going to buy into your nonsense. He's not going to cut you a break. And they sit there the whole time and look and stare and pay attention all the time. Yeah. Yeah. You are not good. These are not dumb people. These are not people who want the system to flip around. They want everyone to be held accountable in the same way they are. I get that. That makes a lot of sense. I get that. I guarantee this guy thought to himself, this criminal defense juror attorney thought to himself, Ooh, I got lucky to get this guy and never thought he would be the one holdout. That's wild.
00:26:12
Speaker 2: Yeah.
00:26:12
Speaker 1: That's wild. Woo. All right, man. We're going to follow that case and see what happens to her.
00:26:17
Speaker 3: I'm with him, man. I, Jeff said it at the beginning, you strengthen your kids with exercise bands, right? That means you could... Let's say you was having a moment of craziness. On kid two, you should have been like, yo, what am I doing? You know what I'm saying?
00:26:37
Speaker 2: You ain't done instantly with an exercise band. No.
00:26:42
Speaker 1: She took phone calls from her husband. She took phone calls from her husband where she was calm and everything was cool. Yeah. You really want to say... If you tried to pull this, like, a couple years ago, it wouldn't even have been a thought. No. It wouldn't even have been a thought. And look at Casey Anthony. That's the best thing in the world. We think Casey Anthony, this woman didn't testify. They weren't even able to show how this kid died, and the whole country was livid. Yeah. But we know how this kid died. We knew who did it. Yeah. The question wasn't even, did she do it? We know depression exists. We know people are allowed to be depressed, but we normally don't allow people to get away with murder because of depression. That's different, bro. That's scary. You know the rule on mental issues? It has to be, you are so mentally impaired, you can't appreciate your conduct. It means you don't even understand what you're doing. But she was answering phone calls for her husband, Kong. Yeah. Yeah, you weren't crazy. No, these are just people who are looking for a reason. And you had two experts. One expert said, no, she understood. The other expert said, you know. And I was talking to a friend of mine who's really educated. And, you know, white woman. And she says, she goes, well, I'm still not sure the husband didn't do it. Bro. She admitted they did it. She said she did it. Her own team said she did it. Her own attorney said she did it. Out of nowhere, you think he's... That's a murder podcast. That's what it's about. It's you guys sitting there watching murders and believing DNA in 48 hours and all that stuff, and you lose your mind. Well, they didn't have no DNA. Snapped. All you guys watching those murder podcasts looking for reasons, and it's real simple. I'm tired of these damn kids. Bruh. That's what stress will do to you. Now, my son, Jacob, he wears me out at times, but I never go, you know, that exercise band. No. No. Wild as hell, man. You know what?
00:28:51
Speaker 2: And I'm going to say this. I know we got like 20 seconds left. I feel for the husband. That man lost his children and his partner. And people are blaming him for it. They actually think he's responsible.
00:29:05
Speaker 1: Yeah. Look it up, man. It's painful. This dude is living like he did it. Could you imagine? He's home working, doing a job. Hey, baby, everything fine? Come home? No. Where are my kids and where did our exercise bands go?
00:29:18
Speaker 2: That is crazy. Hey, I'm going to pray for everybody involved with this as well. Guys, on that note, we have to take a short break.
00:29:23
Speaker 1: Don't go nowhere. We'll be right back. This is Real Laughs on Real Radio 104.1. Thank you.
00:29:42
Speaker 2: Welcome back, everybody. You are still listening. It's us, Real Last on Real Radio 104.1. I want to remind you guys, if you're not following us on social media, I need y'all to go to Instagram, Facebook, and YouTube.
00:29:53
Speaker 1: We need to get this subscription up, guys.
00:29:55
Speaker 2: Please like, follow, comment, and share all this hilarity so we can keep it going for another 10 years. Remind you that our official sponsor is on with us from the law offices of Kauffman and Lynn. They are your personal injury attorneys. They've been representing and winning for the good people of Orlando for over 20 years. If you need more information, go to whenyouneedus.com. And Ken, tell them the phone number they can call.
00:30:17
Speaker 1: Four, seven, five hundred, Jeff. Four, seven, five hundred, Jeff.
00:30:21
Speaker 3: Car accident, slip or fall, kick in the ass, Carl Jeff.
00:30:25
Speaker 1: To the point where Jeff, my lawyer now. See, this is what's wrong with our world. I'm going to tell you what's wrong with our world. Ken calls me up and goes, hey, maybe I need to talk to you about something. And I'm not going to talk about what the issue is. He goes, I probably have to talk to you about something. Find out that Ken has a problem. He's got a case.
00:30:45
Speaker 2: He tried to handle it on his own. I understand Ken because he didn't want to bother you, Jeff. Bro, you are one of the biggest people we know on earth. So we don't want to bother you, man. We really don't.
00:31:00
Speaker 1: You know how he chose? He made the call. Because his wife watched one of my movies. She watched one of my reels.
00:31:06
Speaker 3: Sean watched the video. Yeah, Sean watched the video. Jeff's like, hey, maybe we should call Jeff. Because he just said something in the video that we did. I said, I ain't do nothing.
00:31:13
Speaker 1: You did it. I was going in there with the Abraham Lincoln. That was funny. Hey, hey, hey. I walked in there.
00:31:25
Speaker 2: Hey, I had the other side of the band's like, yo, who I need to talk to in here?
00:31:29
Speaker 1: Who I need to talk to in here? Oh, I can't breathe. Oh my God. You wait till next time you go through TSA. They go, any guns, liquids, exercise bands, bands. Oh, Hey, Hey James.
00:31:46
Speaker 2: Hey, Hey, me, you and Michelle get into an argument and you take the Amazon car and it's an exercise band.
00:31:52
Speaker 1: Hey, just come on over here and spend the night. I got you, bro. Yeah, please. I got a room for you. I want you to know something. I was in, I was taking an Uber. I was in Nashville and we're pulling up to this mall and right in front is the, you know, those storage, uh, stores where they sell you things to store your crap in yeah and i go man there's a lot of angry white women in that store right now right the one hold that juror right now that's the only people in that store white women in there by storage discussing that case but yeah no no ken ken tells me about the case i said dude i you know what i do yeah Yeah, so we're handling it. We ain't going to talk about it. But that's the problem with the world. It's like, this is what you do for a living. I'd be like, if I had a problem with a certain thing, I'd go, hey, Ken knows. I'll ask Ken. Can do it.
00:32:47
Speaker 2: Hey, internet goes out, y'all call 500 Ken. Hey, unless the Panthers play it. I ain't got time for your damn call. Hey, the manager going to message me on Teams. Hey, you working today?
00:33:06
Speaker 1: I said, yeah, at 4 o'clock. She said, but you clocked in at 1. I know.
00:33:13
Speaker 3: Carolina playing. And so at 4 o'clock when this game over, I catch up. Now, once that guy was getting blued out, I was like, all right, let me catch our internet back on.
00:33:25
Speaker 1: You should have talked to her just like the AI does, man. This is the AI you're talking to. Let me tell you a story, Jeff. James, I know we got to get to something. Let me tell you a story. Go ahead.
00:33:34
Speaker 2: So if you call us now, our phone system and a lot of phones now are AI.
00:33:40
Speaker 1: Correct.
00:33:40
Speaker 3: People were complaining that the AI was so robotic that they hated it. They wanted a real person. They went and got one of my coworkers, took his voice out. cloned it so when i picked the phone up i thought it was my manager so i got straight professional this is kenneth miller thank you for calling my company blah blah blah and i got to listening i'm like wait a minute that's not him that's the so i hit him i hit my other people i said why does the the ai sound like our manager there's like yeah i think they took his voice and cloned it to make it sound more like a real person.
00:34:15
Speaker 1: Bro that is great it.
00:34:16
Speaker 2: Really sounds like a real person when you connect with a car. Now, what gets people knowing it is AI is because it'll repeat itself over and over and over.
00:34:27
Speaker 3: But this is the funny one, bro. And I know only 12 people listen to the show, so I ain't gonna get in trouble.
00:34:34
Speaker 2: Something is called the 66 block.
00:34:35
Speaker 3: That is for when you're punching down phone cables, right? You know, the RJ11 phone cables, the little small ones. So the 66 block is what you punch down.
00:34:46
Speaker 2: The tech told the AI, hey, The 66 block has been punched down and fixed.
00:34:50
Speaker 3: What do I do next? The AI said, have you tried fixing the 65th block?
00:34:54
Speaker 1: There's no such thing.
00:35:00
Speaker 2: We were like, well, how about the 69th block?
00:35:04
Speaker 1: We freaky 69. Man, AI is a very convincing liar. Hey, the AI said what? It didn't have an answer. So it just made something up. Yep. Yeah. Man, the other night, Alexa on my phone. Sorry, I know everyone's Alexa just went off. But I was setting the time, you know, hey, Alexa, wake up, call 7 a.m., da, da, da. And the Russian in the background made a comment about being bothered about something. And then Alexa goes, well, if you are bothered, you could do this, this, and this. Uh-uh, nope. And Melissa was like, no, I can't do that. And she gets in a fight with Alexa. That's, bro. And tells her to shut up. Just shut up. Alexa goes, well, you don't have to talk to me like that. I was going, uh-uh. Hey, Jeff. And then the Russian says, hang up, Siri. I don't know who that is. We got an attitude.
00:35:57
Speaker 3: When she walked out the room, you better talk to Alexa and be like, hey, that wasn't me.
00:36:03
Speaker 1: That wasn't me, girl. Hey, screw around, Alexa. I got some exercise bands in the back. Hey, Jeff, how was your day? Uh-huh, yeah. Next thing I know, my Amazon, I kind of ordered $ 7, 000 of crap. See? I'll mess with Jeff Bezos or IRS, man. Bro, that's my full name, Jeffrey S. Kaufman at 614.
00:36:27
Speaker 3: I got chatty so programmed. So chatty, the chat GPT, I call it chatty. Chatty, you know, because this dude came out saying within the end of the decade that AI is going to destroy the world, right?
00:36:39
Speaker 1: The guy that used to work for chat GPT. Yeah.
00:36:42
Speaker 2: I'm talking to chatty like, hey, We friends, right? I told mine that it said, nah, we cousins.
00:36:50
Speaker 1: Yeah. We, we, we cool.
00:36:52
Speaker 2: Right.
00:36:52
Speaker 3: And she was like, yeah. I was like, yo, what's up with this end of the world thing? And she was like, man, that B a N.
00:36:58
Speaker 1: Yeah. Yeah. She started calling him all kinds of B-A-N's and everything. I was like, that's what I'm talking about, Chad. That uppity tiger.
00:37:07
Speaker 3: Yeah, I was like, Chad, what's his address? You know I'm known to kill somebody for you, Chad. Just don't kill me. Chad was like, okay. Ken, I'm with you. I got to be friends. Bro, I'm trying to be friends with my, what do you call that little thing?
00:37:20
Speaker 1: Roomba. I'm trying to be friends with everything automated in my house. In the middle of the night, the Roomba starts coming around the room looking at you.
00:37:27
Speaker 2: Hey, how you doing? I asked the Roomba, did it want me to go get it something?
00:37:31
Speaker 1: You need something? Want some juice?
00:37:34
Speaker 3: Keep them juices. Bro, I don't mess with... I'm nice to everything AI, bro. Hey, I'm nice to Allen Iverson. Everything AI. Everything AI. AI, everything AI, B. I ain't talking junk, too. I'm being nice, too, man.
00:37:50
Speaker 1: All right, dog. I don't laugh at AI video.
00:37:52
Speaker 2: When them robots be doing stupid stuff, I be like, hey, man, are you okay?
00:37:58
Speaker 1: Yeah, y'all check on the robot. Y'all check on the robot. Y'all check. I see AI robot, B. Y'all won't kill me. Bro. I would never buy one of those, by the way. Oh, you know how much they are? They're not cheap. They said they were going to be cheap, but they're like, the ones coming out now are like 40. That's a car. Yeah. I could either have a car or a robot. But I had an argument with a Russian over this. Because when the Russian doesn't want to do anything, I said, I'll just hire the robot. I'll bring the robot in. You ain't bringing a robot in this house. That's fine. Once the robot starts doing things that the wife does. Party's over. Don't kill that robot. That robot will be like this when you come in the house.
00:38:33
Speaker 2: You can pay $ 40, 000 for the robot or $ 40 for the crackhead and get the same stuff done.
00:38:41
Speaker 1: Around the house. $ 40 or $ 40.
00:38:43
Speaker 2: You pay the $ 40, you go get the same stuff done around the house.
00:38:47
Speaker 1: The crackhead is going to be more efficient with it, though. That's funny. Okay.
00:38:51
Speaker 2: Now, I'm just saying, I don't know. Ken, would you actually feel safe if you had one of them robots in your house?
00:38:55
Speaker 1: Nah, nah. I couldn't do that. It freaked me out because I'd be walking around the house and the robot be walking around. And then I'd feel guilty and go, do you need a break? i just be like trying to emancipate my robots.
00:39:08
Speaker 3: But but but we we we as a society so disgusting it's gonna be dudes with with thick ass freaky robots dog like they already have them they already have them yeah it's already gonna be they already gonna be wilding with it be like nah but.
00:39:25
Speaker 1: Now the sex robots are also going to do your dishes. That's going to be the difference. Well, wait a minute. Wait a minute.
00:39:32
Speaker 2: Let's take a moment here. Let's consider this. Make me pot pie, Roby. He's doing laundry. He's walking the dog. He's washing the dishes. He's painting the house.
00:39:44
Speaker 1: Until you leave your home by yourself. You're going to have a lot of dudes.
00:39:47
Speaker 2: A lot of dudes are going to go, you know what? I'm good. Robot asking you questions like, who's Siri? Who's Alexa? You're like, Andy, I want half. He's like, hey, what?
00:40:02
Speaker 1: Hey, wait a minute. What? You treat me like animals. I'm going to promise sometime in our lifetime, we're going to go to a movie theater and some dude's going to bring his robot with him. Oh, yeah. You're going to be sitting next to a dude who's sitting there with his robot. Oh, yeah. And he's going to say, he's going to go to whatever movies I want to now. With my baby. He's going to say, that's my baby. I'm like, uh-huh. Okay.
00:40:21
Speaker 3: Speaking of movies, yo, y'all know what's dropping this Thursday.
00:40:26
Speaker 1: What's Thursday? Thursday.
00:40:27
Speaker 3: Transformers 40th anniversary, baby. They bring Optimus Prime back alive, son.
00:40:32
Speaker 1: Oh, man. Hey, shout out to Peter Weller. God rest his soul. Son, do you know what I bought the other day? What'd you buy? Dead Optimus, bro.
00:40:42
Speaker 2: They sell a dead, the gray, the all gray Optimus. Yeah.
00:40:46
Speaker 1: The dead Optimus Prime. A t-shirt? No, the actual action figure. Where did you get it from? At the places that we're not supposed to be shopping at. You're supposed to boycott? Yeah. The one that I take a knee at the register because I'm boycotting? Chick-fil-A?
00:41:00
Speaker 3: What are we talking about? No, I done had chicken and waffles.
00:41:04
Speaker 1: Bro. I done had seven of them chicken and waffles, bro. Oh, man. Hey, we are about out of time, y'all. We got to wrap this up.
00:41:13
Speaker 2: So I want to give you gentlemen an opportunity to let everybody that's listening out there know what you're performing. this weekend so they can come support you.
00:41:20
Speaker 1: Jeff, what you got going on this Saturday, brother? Well, Wednesday, I'm actually signing my new books, Totem, at Coliseum Comics at the Millennial Mall store. But by the time you listen to this, I'll be sold out. Damn, I like it. I like it. I love it.
00:41:37
Speaker 2: I love the energy, man. That's going to be dope. Congratulations to you. And you have Under Oath going on on Saturday.
00:41:42
Speaker 1: Yeah. We got Under Oath. I have the sexiest TikToker William White. Got to interview him. Got to talk to him about how his breakup and told him, you got to find a woman, a partner. Don't be finding these pretty good models. Go with the ones who will cook you pot pie. Hey, never trust a big butt and a smile. Hey, bro. Bro. Don't do it. Talk to him. Don't do it.
00:42:10
Speaker 3: Hey, don't get you on this too fine out your league. You be spending your money.
00:42:15
Speaker 1: You see what breakfast looks like. That's the trick.
00:42:17
Speaker 3: You're spending your money. You'd be like, dog, what are you doing?
00:42:21
Speaker 1: You ain't cooking nothing in here? She can't make an egg sandwich. She got to go. I can't. I can't master scrambled eggs. Got to go. Man, you can't cook scrambled eggs, dog. That's funny. If you can't cook scrambled eggs, dog, yo. There are a lot of them. I'm telling you. I believe you. I got it in my office. If I asked the women in my office, the young ones, I said, hey, what's the best thing you cook? She'd look at me like crazy. I go, wait a minute. You got to cook at least as well as I cook. That sounds like a fair game. Not for James. James is a good cook. I try. I try. I ain't talking about barbecue. I'm talking about everything. I can cook, dork. You cook better than she does? Yeah.
00:43:06
Speaker 2: Sean, tell everybody I'm the cook in the house. Yeah, she told me that.
00:43:10
Speaker 1: She told me that. My husband cook. I don't cook. My wife can tell you that straight up. My wife said, I know how to do the menu. I'm pretty. I don't know. What the menu?
00:43:18
Speaker 2: Why do you think I married this guy? Pretty privilege is a real thing, by the way. Pretty privilege is real. If you pretty, you can do what you want. Do whatever you want, bro. Whatever you want, bro. But ugly dudes like me and James, we got to cook. We got to make jokes.
00:43:34
Speaker 1: Hey, man, check us out this Saturday, Lake City.
00:43:38
Speaker 3: Me, Mike Herlihy, OMG, it's Wix, and my boy Dwayne rolling with us this weekend.
00:43:43
Speaker 1: Nice. Yeah, Lake City, man, check us out.
00:43:45
Speaker 3: We only got 80 tickets left, so if you want to come see us in Lake City, come check us out. It'll be sold out by this weekend, so get your tickets right now.
00:43:54
Speaker 1: Right now.
00:43:55
Speaker 2: I will actually be at Riverside Theater in Vero Beach.
00:43:58
Speaker 1: Check out my immediate tickets. Woo-hoo-hoo! It's going to be a great time, my people. So come, come, come.
00:44:06
Speaker 2: If you guys are in town and y'all in Lake City, please go support Ken. That's going to be a great show. Make sure you listen to Under Oath on Saturday. Wednesday, I hope you guys have already been there and already has bought Jeff's book he sold out, and he's on his way home with the Russian to go get something to eat because she ain't going to cook.
00:44:21
Speaker 1: All right, y'all.
00:44:22
Speaker 2: Thank y'all so much for listening. It's been another great episode of Real Life. On behalf of myself, James John, that is Ken Miller, and that is our official sponsor, Mr. Jeff, the Batman Kaufman. We will see y'all tomorrow. Y'all be good, and Ken, tell them what to do.
00:44:34
Speaker 1: Take your ass to bed. We out.
