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Welcome to another episode of Not Another Football Podcast with myself,
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Simon Donnelly and Jackie McNamara. And we're delighted our next
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guest is none other than James Gardner, a.k.a.
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Comedy James. Not as delighted as me.
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I cannae wait to tell my dad. Honestly, my favourite
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ever Celtic player is Jackie. It's been documented, I've been
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on Off The Ball. I remember singing... his name is
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McNamara on the eve of the Scottish Cup final you
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came off the bench and I was with a group
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of boys in the baton and he scored?
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Aye so they when I.
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Started I'm just like his name is McNamara they're all
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like who the fuck you're a pal singing McNamara the
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next day he's come off the bench and scored and
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I was like see I told you and you but
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you were the first you know what I mean it's
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like sitting with my wife and my ex-girlfriend you know
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what I.
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Mean you used to be because.
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I was there before him You were my favourite player, aye,
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and then Jackie's come in and I think it was
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the women's answer season, the old attacking midfielder, so I
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had to bomb you, but listen, that's just what happens,
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you just need to upgrade from time to time, you know.
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What I mean?
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Delighted to be here, I would never have thought my
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15-year-old would say, you've won a podcast with me today,
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so thanks for having me, aye.
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And the reason we've got you is because you're along
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the road at the Fringe at the moment. How's things
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going with that?
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It's going really well. I've sold a run out in advance.
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Are you on every day? Every day.
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I've just been doing an 11-day run that I'm doing
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because that was all my girlfriend allowed me to do.
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So you can go for a week. And I was
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telling the boys, I'll probably stretch it for up to
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10 days.
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But I think just with all the stuff I've been
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doing on social media, this is my fourth year doing
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a solo show at the Fringe.
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Yeah.
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You've kind of got four years worth of people coming.
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To see you, buying, then you've got all the social
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media stuff, lots of gigs in Glasgow, so my run,
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our show run sold out, and we've put on double
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the amount of tickets, and they've sold out as well,
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so it's been brilliant, it's been really, really good, so
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you're kind.
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Of going like that, is this it?
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But you know, I don't know if it's like when
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you've got momentum and fit, but you're kind of thinking,
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it might not last, so let's try and take advantage
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of it just now, you.
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Know what I mean? I mean, listen, I've obviously followed
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you on Instagram.
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For the last few years as well, We did a
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wee project with a comedy night member.
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At the pub a few years back. You've really gathered
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pace with the whole thing, haven't you? I think so.
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I think actually it's been one of the things I feel,
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because I kind of see myself first and foremost as
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a stand-up, but.
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I love doing the football stuff. I grew up watching
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All In Excuses. I don't really like comedy, so I
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don't watch comedy.
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People are like, oh, have you seen Daniel Kitson? I
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was like, did he play up front with Hartson at
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West Ham?
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I was like.
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I don't really I don't really watch I only watched
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my first Kevin Bridges special which was that long overdue
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catch up watched that I think about two years ago
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or a year and a half it was the first
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time I'd watched it it was incredible but I just
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don't really I'm not into watching stand up no I
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fucking hate it man I just can't go a lot
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of comedians either do you know what I mean because
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I just grew up playing football I'd rather be about
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the boys and I just watch old Celtic videos on
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YouTube and Tyson Fury fights that's it those are my
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special interests so erm So I'm not a big comedy
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fan in that regard, but I grew up watching On
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An Excuse, that was my, Johnny Watson, probably a hero.
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Followed me on Instagram recently, and I was like, oh
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my God.
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So, you know, just doing the kind of, or his
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daft voices, you know, he would put on the Frankie,
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you know, where's the birds and all that, and just,
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Just everything. So that kind of, for me, is what
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I love doing as well.
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Is that what got you into it then?
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Because we've had a few comedians on, and I'm always curious,
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because I think it's one of the hardest things to do, possibly.
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How did you get into it? Was it just through that?
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No, I think, do you know what it was? So
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my older brother, Alexander, is a really important person in
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my life. He's profoundly disabled. He's got quadriplegic cerebral palsy.
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He's not a verbal, but he communicates with his eyes,
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looks up for yes, looks down for no. And my
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sister and I, as well as my parents, we're largely
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responsible for his care for the majority of our lives.
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So making my brother laugh by putting on daft voices
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and all that, he would always start laughing and that
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was always.
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Kind of my buzz.
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And then to communicate for him, you're having to interpret
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what he's saying, repeat it back to him. So you're
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talking all the time. So it's kind of like if
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you're not talking, you're kind of actively ignoring him. So
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I'm always like, you're all right, you're all right.
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Do you need a drink? Do you want anything?
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So I think that kind of, performing was always there
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and obviously probably not had enough attention as a result
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of that. That's kind of what happens in households when
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you've got somebody who's got complex needs. So I think
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that desire to be fucking loved and to have an
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audience and to be funny was always there and then
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just I think, you know, somebody when I lived in
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London first time round, somebody said to me, I've done
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this comedy course, you should do it. So I went
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and did the stand-up course about 15 years ago and
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you graduate from it, well, like a showcase gig, you do,
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you've built up like a seven minute set, but I
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never followed up, after that I did two gigs, and
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I went to the Philippines to play football, and then
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I never ever did comedy again for another, like, eight,
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nine years, so it wasn't until.
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I, You went to the Philippines to play football? Aye,
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I went to the Philippines, What was that about?
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So basically, so, I used to DJ at Baton, for years,
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and like Bamboo, because you'd spoke before, so you'd get various, trash,
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Was it trash? I used to DJ in Trash on
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a Tuesday Good night Tuesday night I saw no big
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hearts and all that I know a lot of Because
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you've done various stuff I've guest listed half the SBL
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into nightclubs you know so one of the boys I
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used to DJ with a guy called Paul Fox he
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was out in the Philippines running a betting company and
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he phones me up just random I'm living in London
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at this point and he's like listen they've got a
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national football league out here and They're not very good.
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You could maybe get a game.
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What was your background with football then? I would say
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a decent amateur football player. Just a hard worker.
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A very willing cart horse, if you will. Do you
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know what I mean?
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I would say to Jackie in the car over, like,
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fuel sacrifice. I'm just saying I played in the Philippines.
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But I played amateur football from when I was like 15,
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like the grown men. And that was the best learning
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ground because you were playing with some boys that maybe
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played junior, maybe a couple of boys that played lower
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leagues at one stage so they would kind of tell
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you what to do and split defenders and all that
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so I kind of loved the kind of the horrible
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side of the game because I wasn't a very good
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message you know what I mean so anyway I went
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out to the Philippines and kind of sort of blagged
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it a bit and Big Rudy was my manager Brian
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Reed was my manager for a spell so I made
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about four appearances or something over I don't know three
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or four months spell but it was it was brilliant
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brilliant fun came back to London and I was unemployed
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for about six months and then when I was 13
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I moved back in my mom and dad took a
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job with C.R. Smith, keeping the football theme running, and
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I was selling double glazing, commission only double glazing salesman
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for the best part of eight years, and then I
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ended up just basically having a breakdown, man, I was
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working like 80, 90 hours a week at times, commission
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only double glazing sales, I was in my mid to
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late 30s, I was pretty lonely, didn't know that I
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was lonely, I was earning good money, but then because
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I was so unhappy, I was spending loads of money,
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so I lived myself, I bought a one bedroom flat,
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I had the C.R.
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Smith car, the blue and white C.R. Smith car, I
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went and bought myself a Porsche. I loved myself. I
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had two cars. I had no time to drive it.
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I used to drive it.
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I used to take my car out of my wee garage,
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drive it round to Summerson when I grew up, and
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then back in half day and night, put it back in.
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That was me done. £ 600 a month I was paying
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for that. Do you know what I mean? So I
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was drowning in debt. And then I sold my flat,
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paid off my debt, quit my job, and I was like,
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I've been wanting to do comedy for this last eight years.
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So it was always on your mind? It was always
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on my mind, because you always think, I'll get to it,
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I'll do it, I'll do it.
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And I was always working evenings, weekends. I didn't even
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know where to begin. And that's when I started. I
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was 36 and a half and I really started doing comedy.
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And like that was the first eight months before COVID.
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I was just hammering gigs.
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I think I did about 100 gigs near enough in
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that first eight months. And that was kind of it.
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Do you remember your very first one?
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I can remember it. Actually, it was Paisley Road West.
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at a wee pub, Six Rangers pub.
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Aye, aye, Paisley Road West. How did that get done?
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It was, do you know what? What was your material?
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Everybody's rubbish when they first start, like you're absolutely rubbish,
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but you'll get a laugh because most people will go
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up and they'll find something that's a bit funny or
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a bit shocking and, you know, I kind of just
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went up and I was dressed like a drug dealer,
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like a Glasgow drug dealer, just on black night tracky
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bottoms and all that, so for a while, my first
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eight months, that was my hang, I used to go
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up with a, with the sports.
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Gear and all that, and the Yeezys and all that,
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and I'd be like.
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Oh, excuse the drug dealer look and all that, but
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if anyone's looking, you know, just daft stuff like that,
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but that was my very first gig, Sunday night, I
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remember I could do it myself, like dead nervous and
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all that, and you got to do 10 minutes, and
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then you meet other people, and they tell you there's
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a gig here, and there's a gig there, you know,
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and then you kind of start figuring out from there.
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And your first gig, Sink or Swim, did you get
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through it all right?
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Obviously I've worked as a TV presenter for years.
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I used to do the shopping channels.
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I did the Dutch football in Setanta. I presented a
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few games. So I thought I was going to be famous.
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The back story before all that was I was DJing
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from when I was 17 on the tune.
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Did all the different nightclubs and bars.
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And then even when I got a job at Setanta,
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I started off as an assistant producer, doing the match highlights.
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That's by John Hartson and a lot of football guys.
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But I was also going out at night as well.
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So a lot of boys like Scott McDonald would see
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him through the week at Motherwell.
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Then I'd see him on a Saturday night. Do you
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know what I mean?
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So people would be like, he's all right, the big man.
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My mates all played at Motherwell, like Kenny Connolly and
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Mark Reynolds. So they were all there. And it was
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just a brilliant time. So I was always knocking about
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the town. I wanted to be a presenter. I got
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to present a couple of games. Did the Dutch football
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and stuff like that. Moved down to London after we
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went bust because I thought, I'm going to be famous here.
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I'm just remembering as we're speaking, did you stick stuff up?
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It was a shopping channel, I remember.
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Aye. Do you put stuff on your Instagram with that? Aye. Honestly,
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when I tell people what I've done.
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So do you think you need to have something in
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your makeup then just to kind of shrug it off
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as a comedian?
256
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I don't know. I think.
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So I think there's two types of people who do
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stand-up comedies. There's your extrovert and your classic extrovert. I'm like, me, me,
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I'll do it. Even when you're going to a wedding
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and somebody's doing the speech, even if you don't know them,
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I'm like, listen, if you're struggling with me, I'll go
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and do the speech for you.
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Then you've maybe got the opposite.
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I think the other comedians are what I would call
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extroverted introverts. So a lot of comics cannae have the
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cat with you.
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Before the gig. They're all like, I don't want to
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talk to you. I want to say John Gagan.
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Well, a lot of them, I would say 70, 80%
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of them, I like that. They need the space that
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the stage offers to kind of give them that space
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to go and be who they want to be and
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they come alive. But I find all that really hard
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because my personality is big and bold and brash and just,
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you know, amateur football. So you come in, what's happening boys?
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And I've been doing gigs with this guy for two months,
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he's not saying hello to me.
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So then in my head, fuck you and all that.
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Do you know what I mean? You've got to realise
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that not everyone's like that. You know what I mean?
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It's so weird, isn't it?
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I went to Dubai with Joe and John was doing the,
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we'd go over to Dubai every year.
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It's like a Scotland, England thing for three or four days.
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You walked past me on a flight. Did we? I
286
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did say hello. Recently? No, it was about seven, eight
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years ago. I was going back to the Philippines for
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a testimonial. Macca was doing the.
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The after dinner at that one so that was a
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few years ago but John's been over at it but
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John's I've not been to that.
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One he's a nervous have you not been invited for
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that one no I've been invited it's hard to just
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I don't like flying oh.
295
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Do you not but neither does John so he doesn't
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like the flying he's quite a nervous character yeah and
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then well everybody's seen John Gagan once he goes out
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on stage I.
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Don't even know who that is by the way do
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you not he's an ex-footballer he.
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Does the after dinner stuff does he okay but he's.
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Very much a you're describing there and then you'll be
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sitting with him at the dinner and then he goes
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up to do his bit and he's.
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Jim Delahunt's like that we walked with Jim Delahunt and
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obviously I grew up watching these guys Rob McLean whereas
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for example Rob's I think particularly charismatic on and off
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camera I think Jim Delahunt's a smashing guy really like
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him but he would be quite nervous and then he
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would go on and be like a different person because
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what you see is really fluent sort of stalwart of
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Scottish sports television and you would see him off and
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you'd be like, right, OK, just, you know, because obviously.
314
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It's weird, eh? Yeah, it's very, very different.
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00:12:46.909 --> 00:12:49.070
Martin O'Neill's... I've seen Martin O'Neill before he goes on
316
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to the... I know, it's hard to believe, but the
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same in the dressing room. He's quiet, you know, and standoffish, like, shy.
318
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Maybe a few times he's come into the company, but
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then as soon as he steps up to, you know,
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go on the stage or deliver something in the dressing room,
321
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he comes alive.
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It's... It's very similar. John's the one that sticks out
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for me. And he's an ex-player. He played with Motherwell
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and Morton.
325
00:13:12.320 --> 00:13:14.360
And he talks his cell down, but he's just a
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totally different character, ain't he, when he goes up?
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I think, again, some people are different.
328
00:13:20.980 --> 00:13:23.759
I could really probably benefit with probably being a bit
329
00:13:23.850 --> 00:13:25.690
quieter even when I'm on stage. Because I feel that
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if I pause for breath or I'm quiet or I
331
00:13:28.450 --> 00:13:31.809
break the silence, I'm losing control. So I'll just keep
332
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fucking talking. It'll take me to some funny places.
333
00:13:34.850 --> 00:13:34.970
Yeah.
334
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But also there's a couple of times I'm crying, I
335
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don't want anybody to think this is bad, so if
336
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I'm quiet, like even stopping to think for a second,
337
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I'm like, no, so I just keep talking or I'll
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swear or something like that, just as a bridging word.
339
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Do you ever get to a bit of a brain freeze?
340
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Have you ever experienced that on stage?
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I have experienced it, because no matter how confident you are,
342
00:13:53.470 --> 00:13:55.309
because confidence is an act, so I'm dead confident, but
343
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that's like a real forced learned behaviour, so you just
344
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get into the rhythm of being like, right, okay, because
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you kind of know, I'll get through this, but what
346
00:14:03.250 --> 00:14:07.519
happens is, I think it's like a snowball rolling downhill. See,
347
00:14:07.539 --> 00:14:09.440
sometimes you just get caught in a bit of nervousness
348
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or you get in your own head and you see
349
00:14:10.799 --> 00:14:13.259
something and you think, well, fucking, they're having a terrible time.
350
00:14:13.320 --> 00:14:15.759
It's like you can see everything in a split second.
351
00:14:16.200 --> 00:14:19.100
And then maybe you've been flustered and then you can't
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even think of something. And then the panic takes over.
353
00:14:22.120 --> 00:14:24.490
And then a few times you've been like, holy shit,
354
00:14:24.750 --> 00:14:26.450
this is, I'm going to actually, I don't know what
355
00:14:26.490 --> 00:14:28.570
the fuck I'm going to say here. Do you know
356
00:14:28.590 --> 00:14:31.289
what I mean? You start doing my jokes about something else.
357
00:14:31.309 --> 00:14:31.870
Do you know what I mean?
358
00:14:32.230 --> 00:14:35.289
So, but it's, you have to almost, rationalise it and
359
00:14:35.320 --> 00:14:36.620
just go, just forget about it, do you know what
360
00:14:36.639 --> 00:14:38.360
I mean? Like the best way to describe it is,
361
00:14:39.059 --> 00:14:42.059
you always get, and again, it comes with experience, I
362
00:14:42.120 --> 00:14:43.320
always focus on the people who.
363
00:14:43.259 --> 00:14:44.919
Are not having fun or who I think are not
364
00:14:44.960 --> 00:14:46.559
having fun, do you know what I mean?
365
00:14:46.600 --> 00:14:49.179
Room of 100 people, 99 people laughing, I'm like, why
366
00:14:49.230 --> 00:14:50.769
don't you focus on that guy up the back there
367
00:14:50.789 --> 00:14:51.710
who's just sat like that?
368
00:14:52.870 --> 00:14:53.710
Just focus on.
369
00:14:53.629 --> 00:14:55.769
Him and then you've got the old commentary, he's having
370
00:14:55.809 --> 00:14:57.710
a bad time, your jokes are shite, you should quit,
371
00:14:57.750 --> 00:14:59.590
you should quit, this is terrible, oh he's having a
372
00:14:59.629 --> 00:15:01.870
terrible time, why are you doing this material, stop it.
373
00:15:02.529 --> 00:15:04.870
And then, Like, I remember that happened with this gig
374
00:15:04.889 --> 00:15:06.370
and I did a break half-time and they were like,
375
00:15:06.389 --> 00:15:07.350
how you getting on, you enjoying yourself?
376
00:15:07.429 --> 00:15:10.009
I went, she's fucking brilliant, son. I said, alright, she's
377
00:15:10.190 --> 00:15:11.049
fucking done the laughing.
378
00:15:11.370 --> 00:15:13.519
She said, I had a stroke, mate, I cannae move
379
00:15:13.539 --> 00:15:14.600
the right side of my face.
380
00:15:17.019 --> 00:15:18.440
And that was a big lesson for me.
381
00:15:18.480 --> 00:15:21.200
Because, again, the guy the other day, at the Fringe,
382
00:15:21.519 --> 00:15:24.389
sat right down the front, he looked like Pierluigi Collina, right?
383
00:15:24.429 --> 00:15:26.629
So, piercing eyes and he just sat the whole time.
384
00:15:27.850 --> 00:15:29.029
He didn't laugh once.
385
00:15:29.500 --> 00:15:31.769
And you had to go, he'll probably be enjoying it,
386
00:15:32.039 --> 00:15:34.830
he might not be, but also, he'll probably be enjoying it,
387
00:15:35.340 --> 00:15:37.419
I was packing up my camera, and all that, and
388
00:15:37.639 --> 00:15:40.340
somebody came outside, and went, that guy didn't laugh, he's
389
00:15:40.360 --> 00:15:43.019
waiting outside for a selfie, and he was like, brilliant,
390
00:15:43.059 --> 00:15:45.210
my son lives in Somers, and just found out that's
391
00:15:45.230 --> 00:15:48.350
where he grew up, absolutely brilliant mate, and you just go, amazing,
392
00:15:48.509 --> 00:15:50.549
so it's like, you've got to, you've got to be
393
00:15:50.570 --> 00:15:52.350
aware of it, but also switch your brain off to
394
00:15:52.409 --> 00:15:53.690
it as well, I think, do you know what I mean, so.
395
00:15:54.049 --> 00:15:56.009
Who was the, who did we have on, was it
396
00:15:56.190 --> 00:16:00.120
Connor Burns? Connor Burns. That said about, the Scandinavians.
397
00:15:59.509 --> 00:16:03.250
Or something they just aye they're different aye nobody laughs nobody.
398
00:16:02.990 --> 00:16:05.110
Laughs but they'll say that was a good show or
399
00:16:05.129 --> 00:16:05.909
they'll just.
400
00:16:05.649 --> 00:16:08.710
Be but then at the end rave reviews yeah.
401
00:16:08.470 --> 00:16:11.529
Brilliant I think you've got you've got kids similar ages
402
00:16:11.549 --> 00:16:15.320
haven't you I feel that the young team don't laugh
403
00:16:15.740 --> 00:16:18.059
the same way I feel that if they're 18, 19
404
00:16:18.059 --> 00:16:20.879
they're almost when I say too young for comedy they
405
00:16:20.919 --> 00:16:23.379
are not letting themselves go because to laugh is quite
406
00:16:23.419 --> 00:16:24.870
a vulnerable thing do you know what I mean because
407
00:16:24.889 --> 00:16:26.149
you need to be a bit you need to be
408
00:16:26.169 --> 00:16:29.320
a bit stupid you're letting go of your sensibilities and
409
00:16:29.340 --> 00:16:32.740
you're wetting yourself with laughter whereas we do a lot
410
00:16:32.759 --> 00:16:34.500
of late night shows at the Fringe and it's all
411
00:16:34.519 --> 00:16:36.759
the kids they're 18, 19, 20 and they're all just
412
00:16:36.779 --> 00:16:39.019
sat there and I think they're so worried about what
413
00:16:39.059 --> 00:16:41.110
other people are thinking of them because you see them
414
00:16:41.120 --> 00:16:43.269
now they're a bit moody too cool to laugh well
415
00:16:43.289 --> 00:16:45.269
they're kind of posturing a lot more I think they've
416
00:16:45.289 --> 00:16:48.710
got so many metrics to measure themselves against that we
417
00:16:48.730 --> 00:16:50.769
didn't have do you know what I mean they've got Instagram, Snapchat,
418
00:16:50.789 --> 00:16:54.840
WhatsApp so they are kind of see them all you
419
00:16:54.860 --> 00:16:58.179
want to go it's alright so I feel it's really
420
00:16:58.240 --> 00:17:01.250
hard to judge if they find you funny or not
421
00:17:01.259 --> 00:17:02.370
do you know what I mean and then they're like
422
00:17:02.379 --> 00:17:04.230
oh you really enjoyed your show you're like what a chance.
423
00:17:04.089 --> 00:17:07.970
Of cracking a smile I know I chuckle that's true
424
00:17:08.049 --> 00:17:10.029
what about hecklers I.
425
00:17:09.970 --> 00:17:13.269
Don't get many hecklers at all but again I think
426
00:17:13.329 --> 00:17:16.049
that's I'm like cos I'm.
427
00:17:15.910 --> 00:17:18.930
Quite big obviously I follow you on Instagram you get
428
00:17:19.009 --> 00:17:20.890
maybe a wee bit more there that's easier to have
429
00:17:20.930 --> 00:17:22.349
a pop on Instagram isn't it just.
430
00:17:22.230 --> 00:17:25.140
The odd I comment that's fine because again I have
431
00:17:25.160 --> 00:17:27.720
to remind myself I slag people on Instagram I don't
432
00:17:27.759 --> 00:17:31.730
like on Instagram Gary Neville you know what I mean
433
00:17:31.750 --> 00:17:33.789
no but if I'm criticising somebody else or my auntie's
434
00:17:33.829 --> 00:17:35.349
a rotten pundit somebody else has got the right to
435
00:17:35.369 --> 00:17:37.849
say that to me sometimes I forget that as well
436
00:17:37.869 --> 00:17:39.509
because you know maybe try and do them in but
437
00:17:40.230 --> 00:17:41.609
I don't get a lot of heckles but I think
438
00:17:41.630 --> 00:17:47.380
it's because I'm quite a big personality on stage tall
439
00:17:47.599 --> 00:17:50.680
I'm fucking quite assertive so I think a lot of
440
00:17:50.720 --> 00:17:52.859
people go I'm not going to fucking it's like you've
441
00:17:52.880 --> 00:17:53.740
set the tone as a teacher.
442
00:17:53.869 --> 00:17:55.220
I get into comedy, I go like Roy Keane, do
443
00:17:55.309 --> 00:17:56.950
you know what I mean? It's like a derby, like
444
00:17:56.990 --> 00:17:57.509
a derby.
445
00:17:58.490 --> 00:18:00.769
So I kind of feel that that maybe puts people
446
00:18:00.869 --> 00:18:03.450
off doing it. I had a boy today, he just
447
00:18:03.470 --> 00:18:06.930
kept shouting out there. A couple of times, he just
448
00:18:06.950 --> 00:18:08.250
wanted to be involved a wee bit, do you know
449
00:18:08.269 --> 00:18:10.549
what I mean? I've done a joke and he's interjected
450
00:18:10.569 --> 00:18:11.970
and then I've had to address it and then I
451
00:18:12.029 --> 00:18:13.349
finished the joke and he laughed and I went, can
452
00:18:13.369 --> 00:18:14.730
you imagine how much better that joke would have been
453
00:18:14.750 --> 00:18:17.349
if you hadn't fucking said anything to me? But most
454
00:18:17.430 --> 00:18:19.539
of the time, I don't get it because I think
455
00:18:19.559 --> 00:18:21.140
most of the time people are just drunk and they just,
456
00:18:21.680 --> 00:18:24.200
they think that you can't hear them chatting. So they're
457
00:18:24.220 --> 00:18:26.220
trying to explain the jokes and all that. But it's
458
00:18:26.240 --> 00:18:27.680
a bit like being a teacher. I think if you
459
00:18:28.119 --> 00:18:29.859
go on about it all the time, I think you're
460
00:18:29.880 --> 00:18:32.079
ruining the gig for everybody. And also, I think if
461
00:18:32.099 --> 00:18:34.619
you pull somebody up for it, they also feel like
462
00:18:34.660 --> 00:18:35.720
an idiot and then they're going to.
463
00:18:36.079 --> 00:18:38.480
Do that defensive thing. I was only saying this, you know,
464
00:18:38.500 --> 00:18:38.980
because when.
465
00:18:38.900 --> 00:18:41.000
Somebody's checking their phone and they get pulled up by
466
00:18:41.019 --> 00:18:43.200
a comedian, they're always texting their sick baby or something
467
00:18:43.220 --> 00:18:43.869
like that, isn't it?
468
00:18:43.910 --> 00:18:46.170
It's always like, my child's at my child's house. So
469
00:18:46.210 --> 00:18:47.109
I think you need to just.
470
00:18:47.009 --> 00:18:48.930
Kind of go, listen, I know you don't realise it,
471
00:18:49.369 --> 00:18:51.089
If you don't mind, then I just give them a
472
00:18:51.130 --> 00:18:53.319
wee round of applause and I just kind of move on.
473
00:18:53.339 --> 00:18:56.599
But nine times out of ten, if it's just like chit-chatting,
474
00:18:56.619 --> 00:18:58.039
I just take my word. I just take my word.
475
00:18:58.359 --> 00:19:00.339
A lot of your comedy around the Scottish football, I
476
00:19:00.339 --> 00:19:03.920
was watching one earlier, I was pissing myself laughing, one
477
00:19:03.960 --> 00:19:07.190
with McInnes with a Harps top on.
478
00:19:07.849 --> 00:19:08.769
He's talking to Shankland.
479
00:19:08.789 --> 00:19:09.650
Oh, with Lauren Shankhill.
480
00:19:10.170 --> 00:19:12.190
I just want everyone to know I've invented that term.
481
00:19:13.309 --> 00:19:15.109
London Derek McInnes and Lauren Shankhill.
482
00:19:15.130 --> 00:19:18.759
Rangers can be... It's just, we are saying things like people.
483
00:19:19.380 --> 00:19:22.619
kind of think, and then using comedy to, I mean,
484
00:19:23.140 --> 00:19:25.839
I was pissing myself laughing at that. Even you're doing it,
485
00:19:25.849 --> 00:19:28.089
you get sticked for doing it like that?
486
00:19:28.109 --> 00:19:32.250
Ah, you always get, it's like anything else, you always
487
00:19:32.289 --> 00:19:34.190
kind of focus on maybe the one bad comment you get,
488
00:19:34.230 --> 00:19:36.799
so you do, you get, I get Celtic fans going
489
00:19:36.819 --> 00:19:40.900
like that, he's shite, I've got three or four accounts
490
00:19:41.259 --> 00:19:46.480
that religiously comment he's shite on every video, to like
491
00:19:46.519 --> 00:19:49.549
a wee burner account, And somebody's like, do you know what?
492
00:19:50.079 --> 00:19:52.299
He does again, he does again. Do you feel as
493
00:19:52.339 --> 00:19:53.640
if it's a defeat if you block them?
494
00:19:55.480 --> 00:19:57.420
Maybe, but also, yeah, because I think then all that
495
00:19:57.440 --> 00:19:59.140
will do is just motivate them to go, ah, we've
496
00:19:59.180 --> 00:20:00.470
got them, so let's keep doing it.
497
00:20:00.960 --> 00:20:03.039
And also, I actually kind of feel that most of these.
498
00:20:02.960 --> 00:20:05.000
People that are doing it, they must be really, really
499
00:20:05.059 --> 00:20:08.240
lonely and I'm obviously giving them, I'm at the cigarette
500
00:20:08.259 --> 00:20:10.789
burn you know what I mean is it something that
501
00:20:10.829 --> 00:20:12.930
they can feel I don't know because one of the
502
00:20:12.970 --> 00:20:16.519
guys that heckles me online all the time I remember
503
00:20:16.559 --> 00:20:19.220
like once I'd done a video and he put a
504
00:20:19.220 --> 00:20:21.759
laughing face and something quite nice next to it and
505
00:20:21.779 --> 00:20:23.339
I think he's forgot that he's meant to be heckling
506
00:20:23.359 --> 00:20:25.079
do you know what I mean so you do you
507
00:20:25.099 --> 00:20:26.460
do get him so I get silly fans that slag
508
00:20:26.480 --> 00:20:28.670
me because they'll be thinking this is shite you're slagging
509
00:20:28.690 --> 00:20:31.970
silly I get Rangers fans who he's a bigot and
510
00:20:32.009 --> 00:20:35.029
all that and you get people always saying he's no
511
00:20:35.089 --> 00:20:38.160
funny and they're tagging and sometimes you take that oh,
512
00:20:38.220 --> 00:20:39.700
it's a bit shite and you realise, I know, but
513
00:20:39.720 --> 00:20:42.269
you also think other things are shite. So I kind
514
00:20:42.349 --> 00:20:44.470
of tend to, to say you don't get bothered by
515
00:20:44.509 --> 00:20:46.950
it would be a lie, but I would say 95%
516
00:20:46.950 --> 00:20:49.369
of the time you're like, I get all the benefit
517
00:20:49.410 --> 00:20:50.970
of it, so you're due to take a bit of
518
00:20:50.990 --> 00:20:51.490
stick as well.
519
00:20:51.710 --> 00:20:54.309
Did you feel, see when you were, so you obviously,
520
00:20:54.329 --> 00:20:56.250
was it COVID time did you say you started really
521
00:20:56.309 --> 00:20:57.049
pushing it?
522
00:20:57.230 --> 00:21:00.109
No, it was, no, the worst thing is I wish
523
00:21:00.150 --> 00:21:02.769
I'd started TikTok during lockdown because I would have had
524
00:21:02.829 --> 00:21:03.950
a million followers, I would think.
525
00:21:03.970 --> 00:21:06.579
That's what I was going to ask you because conscious of.
526
00:21:07.720 --> 00:21:10.400
all your content going onto it, is that an avenue
527
00:21:10.420 --> 00:21:11.880
that you felt you had to get into there to
528
00:21:12.099 --> 00:21:14.079
get yourself more out there?
529
00:21:14.099 --> 00:21:15.480
Do you know what it's a bit like? Is it
530
00:21:15.500 --> 00:21:17.150
just easy? It's a bit like what we were.
531
00:21:17.029 --> 00:21:20.710
Talking about beforehand, about, you know, people overanalyzing things, where
532
00:21:20.730 --> 00:21:22.589
they're going like that, about Kasper Hof slicking the ball
533
00:21:22.609 --> 00:21:23.910
around the side, and he must have worked on that
534
00:21:23.950 --> 00:21:25.910
through the week, and you're like, well, he worked on
535
00:21:25.950 --> 00:21:27.650
passing the ball out wide. No, because a lot of
536
00:21:27.670 --> 00:21:30.630
the time, something just happens, and you go, oh, that works.
537
00:21:30.650 --> 00:21:33.569
So I think during lockdown, I was putting the odd
538
00:21:33.589 --> 00:21:35.970
little thing out on Instagram, but at that point I
539
00:21:35.970 --> 00:21:37.950
was too scared about what my pals would think and
540
00:21:37.970 --> 00:21:40.299
I didn't even know what TikTok was and I was like, oh.
541
00:21:40.319 --> 00:21:42.960
So I didn't start that probably for about another year
542
00:21:42.980 --> 00:21:44.940
until we came out of lockdown. I did my first
543
00:21:45.119 --> 00:21:46.960
couple of gigs after lockdown. That was when I started
544
00:21:47.000 --> 00:21:49.740
putting wee sort of stand-up clips out. And I'm talking about,
545
00:21:49.759 --> 00:21:51.559
you know, like you'd have the phone and you'd be
546
00:21:52.000 --> 00:21:54.319
put up against a bottle of water, you know, and
547
00:21:54.339 --> 00:21:56.079
you'd be getting up and filming it and sort of
548
00:21:56.099 --> 00:21:58.680
like that. And so I bought like a little tripod
549
00:21:58.700 --> 00:22:01.140
for eight quid off Amazon. You know, that was, you know,
550
00:22:01.500 --> 00:22:03.920
I was more advanced than a lot of people. back
551
00:22:03.940 --> 00:22:06.700
then doing it and you're embarrassed doing it because you're
552
00:22:06.740 --> 00:22:09.880
doing gigs with people for example like Connor Burns at
553
00:22:09.920 --> 00:22:11.700
that stage who was not going up and filming his
554
00:22:11.779 --> 00:22:13.680
own gigs and he was obviously been doing it for
555
00:22:13.700 --> 00:22:16.769
years longer than you was really well regarded or you'd
556
00:22:16.789 --> 00:22:19.910
be you know Mark Nelson or Ray Bradshaw people that
557
00:22:19.930 --> 00:22:22.970
were pro comedians and you're like I'm just a wee
558
00:22:23.009 --> 00:22:24.910
guy I don't make up film any stuff but I
559
00:22:24.950 --> 00:22:28.109
was very sort of resolute I just kind of I
560
00:22:28.150 --> 00:22:30.609
kind of had some feeling no I think this is
561
00:22:30.650 --> 00:22:33.170
what you do try and build mmhmm a following or
562
00:22:33.210 --> 00:22:35.640
a brand I don't really I didn't think I consciously
563
00:22:35.660 --> 00:22:37.079
sat down and went right this is what to do
564
00:22:37.099 --> 00:22:39.420
it's just it kind of felt like the right thing
565
00:22:39.440 --> 00:22:41.980
to do and then you start getting I think people
566
00:22:42.000 --> 00:22:43.900
oh this is great big man like you know I
567
00:22:43.940 --> 00:22:45.599
can't wait to come and see you and I just
568
00:22:45.619 --> 00:22:47.559
kind of then sort of made it my thing and
569
00:22:47.579 --> 00:22:49.299
then all of a sudden I think when I started
570
00:22:49.339 --> 00:22:50.940
the TikTok account that was the big thing because you
571
00:22:50.960 --> 00:22:52.880
were getting big growth on TikTok and that's when I
572
00:22:52.880 --> 00:22:56.779
realised oh people people are kind of consuming this sort
573
00:22:56.839 --> 00:22:59.779
of stuff and then it for me all of a
574
00:22:59.799 --> 00:23:02.779
sudden I started really thinking about the jokes for the clips,
575
00:23:02.799 --> 00:23:04.700
you get a lot of comedians purists, like, no, no,
576
00:23:04.740 --> 00:23:07.500
think about the jokes, think about them both, so I
577
00:23:07.539 --> 00:23:09.099
don't mind putting stuff on, I just think, well, I'll
578
00:23:09.119 --> 00:23:13.079
just write more stuff, so, probably my most famous bit,
579
00:23:13.440 --> 00:23:16.339
a stand-up, I think it's been the, the Roddy the
580
00:23:16.359 --> 00:23:19.269
Prodigy story, you know, the stand-up bit, it's a joke
581
00:23:19.289 --> 00:23:21.210
I've done, it's about certain means in Brazil, it's all
582
00:23:21.230 --> 00:23:24.569
based on a true story, it's 95% true, like most,
583
00:23:24.650 --> 00:23:28.250
you know, comic stories, but that all came, from me
584
00:23:28.289 --> 00:23:32.890
hearing Tam Cowan's, Juventus story, you know the donkey? The
585
00:23:32.910 --> 00:23:34.990
donkey has a guy over for dinner and he's like, ah,
586
00:23:35.009 --> 00:23:36.349
it's a picture of a zebra up on the wall
587
00:23:36.390 --> 00:23:37.630
and he says, what's that? That's when I used to
588
00:23:37.650 --> 00:23:40.769
play for Juventus. And I just thought, I'd like to
589
00:23:40.809 --> 00:23:43.150
come up with something like that. And then.
590
00:23:43.759 --> 00:23:45.700
So what is yours again? Is it in the favelas
591
00:23:45.740 --> 00:23:47.200
in Brazil or something? Aye, that's it.
592
00:23:47.220 --> 00:23:49.900
It's basically, I'm out in Brazil, it's a true story,
593
00:23:49.920 --> 00:23:53.359
but when I'm out in Brazil, a guy, Stephen, you'll
594
00:23:53.380 --> 00:23:54.859
probably know him for a lot of the dinners, I
595
00:23:54.880 --> 00:24:00.220
think he organises, he's on he's an accountant, he's based
596
00:24:00.279 --> 00:24:04.660
out opposite Albion Wolver Stadium and he messaged me when
597
00:24:04.680 --> 00:24:06.099
I was out in Brazil, he's like listen I know
598
00:24:06.119 --> 00:24:07.839
a boy that's got a bar in Rio, go and
599
00:24:07.880 --> 00:24:09.119
see him, we'll get you a drink and all that,
600
00:24:09.160 --> 00:24:09.759
he's a Celtic fan.
601
00:24:10.519 --> 00:24:11.119
I'm like what?
602
00:24:11.319 --> 00:24:13.759
And sends us to this address and he's like you
603
00:24:13.779 --> 00:24:15.460
go to the corner of the street of death in
604
00:24:15.579 --> 00:24:19.299
Ipanema and I'm out there with a boy in Old Scotia, Glasgow,
605
00:24:19.319 --> 00:24:22.640
his missus was Brazilian, she's from Rio and so we
606
00:24:22.660 --> 00:24:25.910
go to this bar and we've asked this guy called Humberto.
607
00:24:25.390 --> 00:24:28.150
And I'm like, Humberto, who's Humberto? I didn't say any problem,
608
00:24:28.170 --> 00:24:28.910
I asked for the king.
609
00:24:29.589 --> 00:24:32.250
And there's this guy, most Brazilian guy you can imagine
610
00:24:32.269 --> 00:24:34.390
in your life, with a full Celtic strip on.
611
00:24:34.549 --> 00:24:37.430
He wears a Celtic strip every day. And he sees
612
00:24:37.509 --> 00:24:40.569
us and he's like, oh, Bishop's Briggs. And I'm like, ah.
613
00:24:40.609 --> 00:24:43.970
Bishop's Briggs. So at that point, he'd only been to
614
00:24:44.009 --> 00:24:45.609
Celtic Park twice and he stays in Bishop Briggs.
615
00:24:45.630 --> 00:24:48.119
He was there, he'd been here all week. I missed
616
00:24:48.130 --> 00:24:49.950
him on Saturday because I was doing a gig at Gracie's,
617
00:24:49.970 --> 00:24:50.420
I couldn't.
618
00:24:50.259 --> 00:24:53.339
Get round to Boteco. but he'd come over, but I
619
00:24:53.380 --> 00:24:54.279
was just like, Stephen.
620
00:24:55.349 --> 00:24:57.589
Not only how did you meet this guy, the guy's obviously,
621
00:24:57.609 --> 00:25:00.730
for some reason, a Celtic fan, made the pilgrimage from
622
00:25:01.109 --> 00:25:04.150
Rio to Celtic Park, and has ended up in with
623
00:25:04.170 --> 00:25:06.829
a group of guys, Philip Bishop Briggs, speaks no English,
624
00:25:06.849 --> 00:25:08.390
and they're like, come on, son, you'll be all right,
625
00:25:08.410 --> 00:25:12.069
and they've just obviously took him under their wing, and basically,
626
00:25:12.130 --> 00:25:14.130
I kind of build up a story, he takes us
627
00:25:14.190 --> 00:25:16.630
on a favela tour the following day, which is all true,
628
00:25:17.470 --> 00:25:19.309
and we get to the favela tour, and I just,
629
00:25:19.900 --> 00:25:22.349
In my head, I just like, that would be quite,
630
00:25:22.380 --> 00:25:24.950
I don't know how it came about, but I just
631
00:25:25.009 --> 00:25:28.250
think the Brazilian names, and just Rodrigo, and I just went, Rodrigo, Roddy,
632
00:25:28.410 --> 00:25:30.289
Roddy the Prody, and then that's when I built up
633
00:25:30.849 --> 00:25:34.349
the story about how his brother-in-law, he's called, you know,
634
00:25:34.450 --> 00:25:36.660
he's a ranger's man, he's called Roddy the Prody, and
635
00:25:36.700 --> 00:25:41.279
it was probably the first big bit of viral stand-up
636
00:25:41.339 --> 00:25:45.160
comedy that I'd done, and that kind of, people came
637
00:25:45.180 --> 00:25:46.599
to see me doing a work in progress, my first
638
00:25:46.619 --> 00:25:49.460
work in progress was at Tennant's, four year ago I
639
00:25:49.480 --> 00:25:51.380
had ten people come but it was because they'd seen
640
00:25:51.400 --> 00:25:52.609
that joke or something like that you know what I
641
00:25:52.630 --> 00:25:54.990
mean so it kind of encouraged you to well that
642
00:25:55.029 --> 00:25:56.970
was when I'd realized I think that had been shared
643
00:25:57.029 --> 00:25:59.230
a thousand times my uncle who's a big blue nose
644
00:25:59.369 --> 00:26:02.349
sent me a video he was on a flight from
645
00:26:02.849 --> 00:26:05.309
Luton to Alicante and he's got a video filming you
646
00:26:05.329 --> 00:26:07.789
know the seat in front of you somebody's watching it
647
00:26:07.809 --> 00:26:10.430
do you know what I mean so when that kind
648
00:26:10.470 --> 00:26:13.539
of happened you're going alright this is the kind of
649
00:26:13.660 --> 00:26:15.940
this is the power of doing this whereas the more
650
00:26:15.960 --> 00:26:18.970
traditional people way I suppose is getting in, doing the
651
00:26:18.990 --> 00:26:21.630
comedy clubs, getting people to go to the comedy clubs
652
00:26:21.650 --> 00:26:24.130
to come and see you, bit like a band basically,
653
00:26:24.150 --> 00:26:24.869
doing the circuit.
654
00:26:24.990 --> 00:26:26.309
Or a band going viral.
655
00:26:26.529 --> 00:26:28.549
But you see that now, just to touch on the
656
00:26:28.589 --> 00:26:30.549
bands as well, you see that nowadays with bands, and
657
00:26:31.289 --> 00:26:34.309
speaking to a couple of bands personally as well, and
658
00:26:34.329 --> 00:26:36.490
they don't really like doing that sort of stuff, but
659
00:26:36.670 --> 00:26:38.109
they feel as if they maybe have to do it
660
00:26:38.150 --> 00:26:40.369
now just to get themselves out there, it's probably similar.
661
00:26:40.650 --> 00:26:42.490
I think it is, so one of the boys, again,
662
00:26:42.619 --> 00:26:45.000
everything all comes back to playing football, so I play
663
00:26:45.039 --> 00:26:48.420
football on a Friday in London, I mean, red flags
664
00:26:48.440 --> 00:26:50.839
should have gone up there where I play football in
665
00:26:50.940 --> 00:26:53.109
London and it's 11 o'clock to 1 o'clock on a
666
00:26:53.119 --> 00:26:54.940
Friday and I should have thought to myself, who's playing
667
00:26:54.960 --> 00:26:56.710
football at 11 o'clock.
668
00:26:56.490 --> 00:26:57.490
On a Friday morning, right?
669
00:26:58.289 --> 00:27:00.390
And I did it in this group chat and when
670
00:27:00.430 --> 00:27:02.009
I play football in Glasgow, it'll be like the Kings
671
00:27:02.049 --> 00:27:04.730
Park Rangers amateur team of the Shawlins or the Young
672
00:27:04.750 --> 00:27:07.630
Boys of Partick over 40s. And I'm not saying I'm famous,
673
00:27:07.670 --> 00:27:09.049
but when I'm in these group chats, I'll be the
674
00:27:09.069 --> 00:27:10.990
most famous person in this group chat, so I'm I'm
675
00:27:11.009 --> 00:27:12.150
dropping crumbs from my table.
676
00:27:12.549 --> 00:27:14.049
Just why do you have some of these TikToks on me?
677
00:27:14.170 --> 00:27:16.890
I'm grateful that Daddy's giving me this performance behind the scenes.
678
00:27:16.910 --> 00:27:17.630
Just love it, love it.
679
00:27:18.339 --> 00:27:20.779
And then I get added into this group chat and
680
00:27:21.579 --> 00:27:23.559
I'm just going to fucking do the exact same thing here.
681
00:27:23.599 --> 00:27:26.180
I don't know anyone, but my method of making friends
682
00:27:26.240 --> 00:27:27.180
is a bit like Roy.
683
00:27:27.019 --> 00:27:27.900
Keane in a derby.
684
00:27:27.920 --> 00:27:30.839
Just fucking go in there bold and brash early and
685
00:27:30.859 --> 00:27:32.519
you can repair the damage over the next year, but
686
00:27:32.539 --> 00:27:33.480
they'll know who you are at least.
687
00:27:33.500 --> 00:27:35.700
So I get into this group chat and I'm fucking
688
00:27:35.720 --> 00:27:36.710
here taking crumbs from the table.
689
00:27:36.730 --> 00:27:39.210
I'm throwing in TikToks on myself and fucking Derek McKinnon's
690
00:27:39.230 --> 00:27:42.119
impersonation and all that. And then I realised later, this
691
00:27:42.160 --> 00:27:45.319
is an actor's group chat that's been running for 10 years.
692
00:27:45.339 --> 00:27:47.369
They've been playing football and in that group chat it's
693
00:27:47.410 --> 00:27:50.789
been like Jack O'Connell, Barry Keegan, Jordan Stephens with the
694
00:27:50.809 --> 00:27:54.529
Rizzle Kicks, Colin Bikini from Top Boy, Shopa Jerusalem.
695
00:27:54.250 --> 00:27:54.930
From Gangs of London.
696
00:27:54.970 --> 00:27:56.630
And I'm like, oh, there's all the swell winners in
697
00:27:56.690 --> 00:27:58.730
there and they don't know who Derek McInnes is.
698
00:27:58.750 --> 00:28:02.049
Do you know what I mean? Are you still playing
699
00:28:02.069 --> 00:28:03.910
with these guys? Still playing with these guys. A lot
700
00:28:03.990 --> 00:28:04.880
of great boys in there.
701
00:28:05.380 --> 00:28:08.079
And then that team has populated a Sunday team, so
702
00:28:08.099 --> 00:28:10.650
a Sunday league team. And then, One of the boys,
703
00:28:10.670 --> 00:28:12.710
I went and played this against Sunday League team a
704
00:28:12.730 --> 00:28:15.329
couple of times and they've added me into the group chat.
705
00:28:15.769 --> 00:28:17.710
The guy who's kind of taken the running of the team,
706
00:28:17.839 --> 00:28:20.319
just plays the team, seen him come up on Instagram,
707
00:28:20.400 --> 00:28:24.019
Joe Manager has followed you. I went, oh, that guy,
708
00:28:24.039 --> 00:28:26.160
Joe Manager, it must be his big hang, managing the
709
00:28:26.700 --> 00:28:31.180
amateur team. Look at his profile, fucking 120,000 followers on Instagram.
710
00:28:31.460 --> 00:28:35.400
Managers like Busted, The Vamps, Henry Moody, all these young.
711
00:28:35.680 --> 00:28:37.359
Talented acts. You thought he was just the manager of
712
00:28:37.380 --> 00:28:40.369
the team? The manager of the team. And that's kind
713
00:28:40.410 --> 00:28:43.910
of his roster of acts. I think it's that thing.
714
00:28:43.950 --> 00:28:47.269
They're so, some of the nicest people I've ever met,
715
00:28:47.410 --> 00:28:51.759
but they're all huge on, like, Instagram. So people that, like,
716
00:28:51.819 --> 00:28:57.660
who's Henry Moody and who's Rhys Bibby? So they're just
717
00:28:58.160 --> 00:29:00.700
super talented. I call them kids, but, like, they're super talented.
718
00:29:00.720 --> 00:29:02.400
They're all in their early 20s, but they've all got
719
00:29:02.769 --> 00:29:05.990
a million followers each on Instagram and TikTok, whereas I think,
720
00:29:06.049 --> 00:29:08.579
you know, like, he used to tell me when they
721
00:29:08.599 --> 00:29:11.559
go to Brazil we're busted or whatever he went we'll
722
00:29:11.579 --> 00:29:15.039
play a thousand seater because that's the legacy of them
723
00:29:15.079 --> 00:29:18.420
being on TV whereas he went if we take Henry
724
00:29:18.460 --> 00:29:20.660
Moody to Brazil he said we could play twice the
725
00:29:20.680 --> 00:29:23.450
venue or something like that because they've all done their
726
00:29:23.490 --> 00:29:25.849
thing online it's just I know I think the older
727
00:29:25.950 --> 00:29:27.410
ones don't want to do it as much because they're
728
00:29:27.430 --> 00:29:30.569
like I'm here to play music I'm not here to
729
00:29:30.609 --> 00:29:33.450
be social media but I think the younger generation now
730
00:29:33.470 --> 00:29:36.299
of bands are coming up through that's how they're getting
731
00:29:36.319 --> 00:29:38.980
themselves out there I don't know how fair it is
732
00:29:39.099 --> 00:29:42.000
because it's you know there's a bit of injustice said
733
00:29:42.019 --> 00:29:43.519
to that too but I think that's just the world
734
00:29:43.539 --> 00:29:44.420
that we're in now isn't it yeah.
735
00:29:44.740 --> 00:29:48.589
Aye definitely definitely you went to London as well was
736
00:29:48.609 --> 00:29:52.829
that a conscious decision with your the comedy and everything
737
00:29:52.849 --> 00:29:55.750
aye well no really because so when I first moved
738
00:29:55.769 --> 00:29:58.259
to London I was 27 and I just I kind
739
00:29:58.299 --> 00:29:59.160
of felt like I was just.
740
00:29:59.059 --> 00:30:02.380
Getting swallowed whole by Glasgow. I'd been here my whole life.
741
00:30:02.460 --> 00:30:05.109
I'd never gone away for university.
742
00:30:04.789 --> 00:30:05.509
Or anything like that.
743
00:30:05.589 --> 00:30:08.589
Just, you know, the dynamics of my family, like we
744
00:30:08.630 --> 00:30:11.190
were reliant on me and my sister, you know, with
745
00:30:11.309 --> 00:30:13.190
my brother's care and just our kind of set up.
746
00:30:13.210 --> 00:30:15.490
So it was never something I thought about. I was
747
00:30:15.529 --> 00:30:17.049
leaving and it just got to that stage. I was like,
748
00:30:17.069 --> 00:30:19.190
I kind of just really need to get out of here.
749
00:30:19.710 --> 00:30:21.180
So when I was in London, I did the shopping
750
00:30:21.200 --> 00:30:22.960
channels and all that and the old fated spell in
751
00:30:22.980 --> 00:30:23.500
the Philippines.
752
00:30:23.700 --> 00:30:25.299
And when I came back, I couldn't get a job.
753
00:30:26.369 --> 00:30:28.210
And I always wanted to come back to London, because
754
00:30:28.230 --> 00:30:30.269
I didn't really want to leave London, I just couldn't
755
00:30:30.289 --> 00:30:32.809
afford to live there without a job, so my partner,
756
00:30:32.829 --> 00:30:37.089
she's from the South England, and just came up in conversation,
757
00:30:37.150 --> 00:30:38.960
she's never lived in London, her sister lives there, a
758
00:30:38.980 --> 00:30:40.559
couple of her best pals live there, and I'd always
759
00:30:40.599 --> 00:30:43.259
wanted to go back, just kind of came up in conversation,
760
00:30:43.279 --> 00:30:45.359
you know, we were sort of fortunate, we were in
761
00:30:45.400 --> 00:30:47.420
the position that we could go down and sort of
762
00:30:47.440 --> 00:30:49.920
try out and rent a place, and I actually don't
763
00:30:49.960 --> 00:30:52.450
really do comedy down there, I do Top Secret down there,
764
00:30:52.470 --> 00:30:54.009
which is a brilliant club, but I only do that
765
00:30:54.029 --> 00:30:56.130
maybe a couple of times a month, but can you
766
00:30:56.150 --> 00:30:58.450
make money, really? I don't feel on the London circuit,
767
00:30:58.519 --> 00:31:00.220
or on a lot of comedy circuits, because the comedy
768
00:31:00.259 --> 00:31:01.220
clubs pay so little.
769
00:31:01.240 --> 00:31:03.839
You know what I mean? It's quite an outdated model.
770
00:31:03.880 --> 00:31:06.279
They're paying the same fees for headliners on a Saturday
771
00:31:06.299 --> 00:31:08.400
night that they were paying, I think the standard paying
772
00:31:08.420 --> 00:31:11.599
the same fee that they were paying 15 years ago. So,
773
00:31:11.880 --> 00:31:13.720
you're not making money that way, and I came into
774
00:31:13.740 --> 00:31:15.680
this a lot later, so at 40 years old, I
775
00:31:15.720 --> 00:31:19.019
can't really afford to be around comedy clubs all over
776
00:31:19.079 --> 00:31:21.849
London and doing three and four gigs a night to
777
00:31:21.869 --> 00:31:25.079
come away with two, three hundred quid, it's no worthwhile,
778
00:31:25.099 --> 00:31:28.319
whereas if you go up to Blackfriars, you know, and
779
00:31:28.400 --> 00:31:32.119
Chris at Blackfriars, a brilliant guy, he's calling me, you
780
00:31:32.180 --> 00:31:34.900
do the gig in there, his deal is the artist gets.
781
00:31:34.680 --> 00:31:38.220
100% of the door money, and they'll give you a tech,
782
00:31:38.779 --> 00:31:42.539
and a show runner, and they'll look after you, and
783
00:31:42.640 --> 00:31:43.640
you can go up and do that, and you can
784
00:31:43.680 --> 00:31:46.150
come back down, if you do one show, you know,
785
00:31:46.170 --> 00:31:48.509
you can make 1500 quid or something like that, and
786
00:31:48.529 --> 00:31:50.630
you've been on stage for an hour and a half, and,
787
00:31:51.400 --> 00:31:53.559
you know, people come and see, so that's been the way,
788
00:31:53.579 --> 00:31:56.000
the kind of, the model, and I think there's, I
789
00:31:56.019 --> 00:31:57.319
think there's a lot of guys that are doing, like
790
00:31:57.339 --> 00:31:59.720
Stuart Mitchell's doing that, Gary Foles is doing that, Gary
791
00:31:59.740 --> 00:32:00.569
Meekle's doing.
792
00:32:00.369 --> 00:32:04.450
That, you know, Connor, I mean, he's going stratospheric, but
793
00:32:04.549 --> 00:32:07.190
I think that's becoming, there's a change now, same, I
794
00:32:07.210 --> 00:32:08.390
was in it, I was in it at Grace's on
795
00:32:08.410 --> 00:32:11.529
Saturday night, the boy joining there really looked after me,
796
00:32:11.569 --> 00:32:15.130
they were really keen for me to come down, it's not,
797
00:32:15.230 --> 00:32:17.279
it's not a comedy club, so, you know, everyone wants
798
00:32:17.299 --> 00:32:20.380
the perfect, You want low ceilings and the seats facing
799
00:32:20.420 --> 00:32:21.920
the same way and get the lights down.
800
00:32:21.799 --> 00:32:24.599
Low and you're doing it in that big room. It's incredible.
801
00:32:24.680 --> 00:32:27.720
But it was kind of like doing comedy in a
802
00:32:27.920 --> 00:32:30.240
beer tent almost. It was just that kind of atmosphere.
803
00:32:30.509 --> 00:32:33.130
But it was brilliant. It was really, really good. And
804
00:32:33.150 --> 00:32:35.349
they really looked after you. They paid me really well.
805
00:32:37.170 --> 00:32:39.210
As you would expect if I'd run the gig myself
806
00:32:39.250 --> 00:32:41.609
and done the door money. Whereas on a Saturday night,
807
00:32:41.930 --> 00:32:44.289
a comedy club, you might get, I don't know, 250
808
00:32:44.289 --> 00:32:46.109
quid if you're the headliner. If you're doing the middle spot,
809
00:32:46.150 --> 00:32:49.150
you'd maybe get 150 quid, you do that for the weekend,
810
00:32:49.170 --> 00:32:53.190
you're making 300 a pound, you're not paying the mortgage.
811
00:32:53.269 --> 00:32:55.009
It is, when you describe it like that, it's quite
812
00:32:55.029 --> 00:33:00.049
a tough profession to be in. Going back to your
813
00:33:00.089 --> 00:33:02.269
social media then, do you feel it's really important to
814
00:33:02.289 --> 00:33:04.869
get all your content out there? And the good thing is,
815
00:33:05.430 --> 00:33:07.809
you've said before, you lean on the football. So you've
816
00:33:07.829 --> 00:33:09.990
got plenty of stuff to get into.
817
00:33:10.039 --> 00:33:11.250
It's all relevant. I've seen stuff.
818
00:33:13.539 --> 00:33:15.740
That's happened the day before, or even on the same day,
819
00:33:15.769 --> 00:33:17.589
and you've got something out that night relevant to it?
820
00:33:17.630 --> 00:33:20.250
So that's something that I've just, I suppose, I don't
821
00:33:20.269 --> 00:33:22.170
know if it's like you boys in the off-season, you're like,
822
00:33:22.269 --> 00:33:23.730
I'm going to step it up next season, do you
823
00:33:23.750 --> 00:33:25.710
know what I mean? That's it, and we're pounding the
824
00:33:25.750 --> 00:33:29.019
pavements for the pre-season. I realised that, I suppose, the
825
00:33:29.039 --> 00:33:32.079
power of that with the World Cup, and just the
826
00:33:32.119 --> 00:33:35.220
little extra, the little bit of the extra theatre, so
827
00:33:35.240 --> 00:33:37.140
you know, like, people are like, you must have a bag,
828
00:33:37.180 --> 00:33:39.160
I've got a big kit bag full of strips, I've
829
00:33:39.180 --> 00:33:42.950
been buying stuff off Vinted, and, everything at the World
830
00:33:42.970 --> 00:33:45.450
Cup I keep no but I keep getting I kept
831
00:33:45.490 --> 00:33:47.200
trying to buy Ranger stuff off Vinted and it kept
832
00:33:47.220 --> 00:33:49.839
getting cancelled so I think what was happening they were
833
00:33:49.859 --> 00:33:51.480
like because I wasn't even bidding I was just paying
834
00:33:51.500 --> 00:33:53.640
the money that they wanted 20 quid bang right great
835
00:33:53.660 --> 00:33:55.019
and they've got like four days to send it to
836
00:33:55.039 --> 00:33:57.440
you and obviously once they put their details in I
837
00:33:57.500 --> 00:34:01.029
reckon they're going Ian Gardner London don't sell that to
838
00:34:01.049 --> 00:34:02.750
him so I had to buy it for like the
839
00:34:02.789 --> 00:34:05.890
club shop and stuff like that so I feel like
840
00:34:05.910 --> 00:34:08.349
you know about Casper they want the wig and they
841
00:34:08.369 --> 00:34:10.369
want a little bit you know just a little bit
842
00:34:10.429 --> 00:34:12.780
more but if you can My view is if you
843
00:34:12.800 --> 00:34:15.469
can get it out that night, it doesn't need to
844
00:34:15.510 --> 00:34:18.760
be that brilliant. Obviously, I want everything to be really good,
845
00:34:19.489 --> 00:34:21.019
but I think people want to be.
846
00:34:20.949 --> 00:34:22.889
Part of something. They want to share things. They want
847
00:34:22.909 --> 00:34:24.349
to be the first.
848
00:34:24.550 --> 00:34:28.590
They want something that, I suppose, represents how you're feeling
849
00:34:28.630 --> 00:34:30.690
about things or something you can share or be a
850
00:34:30.730 --> 00:34:33.789
part of. So getting it out that night now is
851
00:34:33.809 --> 00:34:36.289
really important. So, man, my sister's like that. You come
852
00:34:36.309 --> 00:34:37.730
into bed and I'm like that. I need to do
853
00:34:37.750 --> 00:34:41.960
a Derek McKinnis video. And then she's like... she's like
854
00:34:42.039 --> 00:34:43.780
brushing her teeth and then I'm just, I'm coming in
855
00:34:43.800 --> 00:34:45.679
to put, I'm coming in to put bronzer on and
856
00:34:45.719 --> 00:34:47.630
I've got the suit on and I'm wearing shorts and
857
00:34:47.670 --> 00:34:49.469
flip flops and she's like, what are you doing?
858
00:34:49.489 --> 00:34:50.829
Do you know what I mean?
859
00:34:50.929 --> 00:34:54.369
So, it's, but I love doing that stuff and I
860
00:34:54.389 --> 00:34:56.630
love talking about football during the stand up because I
861
00:34:56.670 --> 00:34:58.980
think that that's, I think that's a real gap in
862
00:34:59.000 --> 00:35:01.219
the market because it's like, well, most people want to
863
00:35:01.260 --> 00:35:04.420
talk about their team and it's funny, in stand up
864
00:35:04.559 --> 00:35:07.980
and like, I feel that, again, 60 people here today
865
00:35:08.440 --> 00:35:11.639
and doing our different bits and, politics and this and
866
00:35:11.679 --> 00:35:13.219
growing up and all this and then I was like, right,
867
00:35:13.239 --> 00:35:13.679
you want to hear.
868
00:35:13.619 --> 00:35:15.519
Some football stuff? Do you know what I mean? And
869
00:35:15.539 --> 00:35:15.960
that's it.
870
00:35:15.980 --> 00:35:19.559
And talking to a lovely couple from Lytham and we
871
00:35:19.579 --> 00:35:21.039
were chatting about it because I went, I said, I
872
00:35:21.059 --> 00:35:22.639
don't really know where Lytham is but does the golf
873
00:35:22.659 --> 00:35:23.179
get played there?
874
00:35:23.199 --> 00:35:25.099
Is it Lytham? He went, aye, that's right, you know.
875
00:35:25.840 --> 00:35:29.090
And then chatting to them outside and they were, I said, listen,
876
00:35:29.659 --> 00:35:30.769
why made you come and see me?
877
00:35:30.829 --> 00:35:32.010
Because they've travelled.
878
00:35:31.730 --> 00:35:34.389
Up for the fringe and they went, oh, I don't,
879
00:35:34.789 --> 00:35:36.849
come across a couple of your football reels and he
880
00:35:36.869 --> 00:35:37.769
just said, there's loads of.
881
00:35:37.739 --> 00:35:40.260
Scottish people on, there are loads of Rangers fans.
882
00:35:40.280 --> 00:35:43.820
But he said, so I liked that one you did
883
00:35:43.900 --> 00:35:45.639
and all that and they know a boy, who used
884
00:35:45.659 --> 00:35:46.199
to be known.
885
00:35:46.099 --> 00:35:48.800
As the King, is it the King, who's it, Derek
886
00:35:48.820 --> 00:35:50.119
McPartland or something like that? A player?
887
00:35:50.679 --> 00:35:50.780
Aye.
888
00:35:50.840 --> 00:35:53.659
Aye, by the way, it is McPartland. McPartland, that's their mate.
889
00:35:53.679 --> 00:35:55.619
Brian O'Neill stays in that neck of the woods as
890
00:35:55.639 --> 00:35:56.500
well and I think he knows him.
891
00:35:56.820 --> 00:35:59.409
Aye, okay, so that's, they went, well, we're friends with him,
892
00:35:59.630 --> 00:36:01.039
actually used to play with him. So they, So they
893
00:36:01.059 --> 00:36:01.800
kind of know a bit.
894
00:36:01.960 --> 00:36:05.059
So your rules are getting you travelling that. That's it.
895
00:36:05.199 --> 00:36:08.449
It was actually, somebody kind of said, because I remember
896
00:36:08.469 --> 00:36:11.710
at one point thinking, because football stuff has kind of
897
00:36:12.070 --> 00:36:14.929
looked down their nose a wee bit by comedy clubs
898
00:36:15.050 --> 00:36:18.909
and I think comedy's becoming quite middle class now. Because
899
00:36:19.010 --> 00:36:21.670
if you're saying, you're more than going to be a comedian,
900
00:36:21.690 --> 00:36:24.530
but what? I mean, I know Kevin Bridges, very well
901
00:36:24.550 --> 00:36:28.119
in class, he is the GOAT and he's brilliant.
902
00:36:28.719 --> 00:36:31.139
But, he says his dad went like I'll take you
903
00:36:31.159 --> 00:36:31.579
to the clubs you.
904
00:36:31.539 --> 00:36:32.800
Know he was too young to get in he went
905
00:36:32.840 --> 00:36:34.960
I'll take you which is brilliant but if I had
906
00:36:34.980 --> 00:36:36.340
said to my dad at 16 I'm going to do
907
00:36:36.360 --> 00:36:38.019
comedy I'd be fucking very good do you know what
908
00:36:38.119 --> 00:36:40.980
I mean so I think increasingly it's becoming a middle
909
00:36:41.000 --> 00:36:45.210
class sport because you know you don't need to pay
910
00:36:45.230 --> 00:36:47.809
the bills or you know pay the rent.
911
00:36:47.590 --> 00:36:51.849
Plus it's so different from even 10 years ago with
912
00:36:52.349 --> 00:36:52.750
what you.
913
00:36:52.670 --> 00:36:56.489
Can and can't say it's out of offending anybody.
914
00:36:56.650 --> 00:36:58.670
I well I think more than anything it's just the
915
00:36:59.500 --> 00:37:01.300
it's kind of like there's a down payment you need
916
00:37:01.340 --> 00:37:03.389
to make for doing comedy. You need to be able
917
00:37:03.409 --> 00:37:05.630
to do it for five or six years to become
918
00:37:05.690 --> 00:37:08.250
really good at it. And if you can't pay for
919
00:37:08.269 --> 00:37:09.570
it in that time, there's a lot of people who
920
00:37:09.590 --> 00:37:11.710
just never get a chance to get on stage. So
921
00:37:11.730 --> 00:37:13.849
the football stuff I think has been really important for
922
00:37:13.889 --> 00:37:16.309
me because people are coming to see you off of that.
923
00:37:17.210 --> 00:37:19.730
The sketches, the football sketches, people are coming to see
924
00:37:19.750 --> 00:37:22.710
you off that. And I've kind of realised, well, actually,
925
00:37:22.730 --> 00:37:24.949
I should just really sort of lean into that even more.
926
00:37:24.969 --> 00:37:28.159
So I brought didn't he bring the suit and all
927
00:37:28.179 --> 00:37:29.039
that up for the derring?
928
00:37:29.059 --> 00:37:31.030
So I'm going like, I hope he doesn't get through
929
00:37:31.070 --> 00:37:31.829
so I don't need to do a sketch.
930
00:37:31.849 --> 00:37:34.010
Have you got the brown brogues or not?
931
00:37:34.070 --> 00:37:35.329
I've got all that from when I worked at C.R.
932
00:37:35.329 --> 00:37:37.070
Smith, I've got the brogues, I've got the brogues, I've
933
00:37:37.090 --> 00:37:39.119
got everything, but I've got everything.
934
00:37:39.139 --> 00:37:40.780
There's a wee bit of grey in the beard and
935
00:37:40.840 --> 00:37:41.079
all though.
936
00:37:41.219 --> 00:37:42.019
Well, do you know what I think?
937
00:37:42.199 --> 00:37:44.239
I've got, grey stuff I put on but you know
938
00:37:44.260 --> 00:37:46.179
when you use the kind of TikTok green screen app
939
00:37:46.409 --> 00:37:48.150
it was washing my face off it was making my
940
00:37:48.170 --> 00:37:49.650
face go chalk white and I was like oh god
941
00:37:49.670 --> 00:37:51.789
this doesn't work you need to tan up and off
942
00:37:52.010 --> 00:37:54.070
I bought bronzer I don't know if I brought it
943
00:37:54.090 --> 00:37:56.309
with me so my missy's like why are you buying
944
00:37:56.329 --> 00:37:57.469
bronzer and I'm like I need to put it on
945
00:37:57.489 --> 00:37:59.829
for Derek McKinnon so I brought up like the Rangers
946
00:37:59.849 --> 00:38:02.110
training top and I brought up the Celtic training top
947
00:38:02.190 --> 00:38:03.989
and the big the Casper whole wig because I'm like
948
00:38:04.010 --> 00:38:06.139
maybe I'll do something and I can do a sketch
949
00:38:06.159 --> 00:38:09.260
but even all those sorts of things are going fucking
950
00:38:09.300 --> 00:38:12.940
like when I went to Thailand at the January there,
951
00:38:13.199 --> 00:38:15.900
that was when Wilfred Doncey got the boot and she's like,
952
00:38:15.920 --> 00:38:17.539
we're going out for dinner and I'm like, wait, wait,
953
00:38:17.559 --> 00:38:20.139
and I've got the Celtic green on top and trying
954
00:38:20.159 --> 00:38:21.309
to do a Martin O'Neill skit.
955
00:38:21.139 --> 00:38:22.449
And all that, do you know what I mean?
956
00:38:22.570 --> 00:38:24.530
She's like, please man, I'm holding a wee light up
957
00:38:24.570 --> 00:38:27.349
for myself and all that, filming it with one arm.
958
00:38:27.929 --> 00:38:29.420
You couldn't have done Wilfred though, could you?
959
00:38:30.789 --> 00:38:32.690
I don't get allowed to black up these days, fucking,
960
00:38:32.829 --> 00:38:37.489
woke nonsense, woke nonsense that, innit? But even, again, you've
961
00:38:37.510 --> 00:38:39.570
got to think about your choices, even, you know, like,
962
00:38:39.630 --> 00:38:43.409
for example, somebody was like, so either you're doing the
963
00:38:43.449 --> 00:38:45.519
French accent, and I was like, well, I don't think,
964
00:38:45.559 --> 00:38:47.280
I think you've got to just be conscious.
965
00:38:47.300 --> 00:38:49.019
Somebody dug you up for that?
966
00:38:49.039 --> 00:38:51.440
You always get people who think, and I think it's
967
00:38:51.480 --> 00:38:54.309
important to recognise and start to look at it.
968
00:38:54.519 --> 00:38:56.250
I don't have the rule book that says I'm right.
969
00:38:56.369 --> 00:38:57.929
I can only go with what I think is right
970
00:38:58.010 --> 00:38:59.150
and what my intentions were.
971
00:38:59.670 --> 00:39:02.130
So in terms of, like, can I say anything anymore?
972
00:39:02.530 --> 00:39:04.989
I don't know. I think I'm not really worried about
973
00:39:05.010 --> 00:39:05.730
cancel culture.
974
00:39:05.820 --> 00:39:08.670
I think the been proven that you can't get cancelled
975
00:39:08.730 --> 00:39:10.559
if you went to boarding school like you know Jeremy
976
00:39:10.579 --> 00:39:13.199
Clarkson's not been cancelled if I punch somebody at my
977
00:39:13.239 --> 00:39:15.300
work I get blacklisted and that's exactly what happened actually
978
00:39:15.320 --> 00:39:19.199
I got blacklisted as a tanner I went outside for
979
00:39:19.300 --> 00:39:22.570
a fight with my producer at a Christmas night out
980
00:39:22.619 --> 00:39:26.530
that's why Keegs is doing the exec producer of Scottish
981
00:39:26.550 --> 00:39:28.670
football and Sky Sports that's why I'm fucking doing gigs
982
00:39:28.710 --> 00:39:31.960
in a basement there's a reason that I never got
983
00:39:31.980 --> 00:39:35.079
taken to ESPN do you know what I mean whereas
984
00:39:35.099 --> 00:39:37.659
Jeremy Clarkson can do whatever he wants and still get
985
00:39:37.679 --> 00:39:40.840
shows I think when people get cancelled I feel it's
986
00:39:40.909 --> 00:39:45.639
because they've maybe built their reputation on a bit of
987
00:39:45.659 --> 00:39:48.500
your falsehood and then once they say something about people
988
00:39:48.539 --> 00:39:50.179
are waiting for you there's an opportunity to take them
989
00:39:50.199 --> 00:39:51.619
down I think people are waiting for them because they
990
00:39:51.639 --> 00:39:55.380
go you're at it he's no nice guy or they're
991
00:39:55.400 --> 00:39:56.869
full of shit and then I think what they do
992
00:39:56.909 --> 00:39:58.409
is they then go for them they're going through and
993
00:39:58.510 --> 00:40:01.110
then they find the tweets or they find the emails
994
00:40:01.170 --> 00:40:02.869
or somebody else comes forward and I kind of feel
995
00:40:02.889 --> 00:40:04.989
like well if somebody wants to.
996
00:40:04.929 --> 00:40:06.989
Come and do that fair enough but I kind of
997
00:40:07.010 --> 00:40:08.960
feel that the way I try and go about my
998
00:40:09.000 --> 00:40:10.460
business and live my life I think.
999
00:40:10.340 --> 00:40:12.559
There'll be a bigger group of people who'll go he's
1000
00:40:12.619 --> 00:40:15.159
alright by the way and like I get loads of
1001
00:40:15.179 --> 00:40:17.239
really nice messages for Rangers supporters and stuff.
1002
00:40:17.079 --> 00:40:19.519
Like that, really, like, big man, I'm a blue nose
1003
00:40:19.539 --> 00:40:20.110
and all that, and.
1004
00:40:20.070 --> 00:40:21.969
I think you're fucking great, or I think your stuff's funny,
1005
00:40:22.010 --> 00:40:24.429
and I was offended, but I think it's important to
1006
00:40:24.469 --> 00:40:27.280
kind of always just try and be cognizant of it,
1007
00:40:27.289 --> 00:40:29.670
and just go, maybe that was wrong, it wasn't my intention,
1008
00:40:29.690 --> 00:40:30.349
do you know what I mean?
1009
00:40:31.349 --> 00:40:34.309
So, your works heavily football theme, we'll finish in a
1010
00:40:34.329 --> 00:40:36.820
wee bit, the football obviously still takes your beloved team,
1011
00:40:36.920 --> 00:40:39.559
which are favourite games, favourite, seasons?
1012
00:40:39.900 --> 00:40:42.480
Favourites, so I never, again, when I was, so growing up,
1013
00:40:42.480 --> 00:40:45.079
my dad worked in a night shift, he's worked in
1014
00:40:45.179 --> 00:40:47.739
a night shift at UIE, he was a welder, so,
1015
00:40:47.860 --> 00:40:52.449
you know, my childhood, the majority was my mum, my
1016
00:40:52.489 --> 00:40:55.010
brother and my sister, you know what I mean, so,
1017
00:40:55.610 --> 00:40:56.929
it's not like I had somebody who could take me
1018
00:40:56.949 --> 00:40:59.510
to go and watch the fitment, for example, so, you know,
1019
00:40:59.750 --> 00:41:01.530
growing up, I remember watching the school cup final and
1020
00:41:01.550 --> 00:41:03.989
all that, and having like a Celtic trip, but I
1021
00:41:04.030 --> 00:41:07.050
wanted to go to Celtic, but didn't have anyone to
1022
00:41:07.070 --> 00:41:08.860
take me and then a woman at our church Louise
1023
00:41:08.880 --> 00:41:10.599
Cricosa went and said to my mum I'll take him
1024
00:41:10.619 --> 00:41:13.199
to see Patrick Thistle and so he's still going to
1025
00:41:13.219 --> 00:41:17.079
see Patrick Thistle and my mum used to teach Keep
1026
00:41:17.139 --> 00:41:19.619
Fit in Somerset and used to teach Jim Duffy's wife
1027
00:41:20.239 --> 00:41:23.800
so Duff's two is down flying from like my 8th
1028
00:41:23.820 --> 00:41:25.260
or 9th birthday I think he took us down to
1029
00:41:25.280 --> 00:41:27.699
Far Hill you know like just into the training the
1030
00:41:27.719 --> 00:41:29.699
dressing room and all that and then my dad worked
1031
00:41:29.739 --> 00:41:32.820
with Albert Craig's brother in the night shifts in the
1032
00:41:32.840 --> 00:41:36.809
yards so I was a I was a mascot for
1033
00:41:36.849 --> 00:41:41.630
Thistle against Celtic and George Shaw scored the winner and
1034
00:41:41.909 --> 00:41:44.010
then he moved to Dundee after that so I kind
1035
00:41:44.050 --> 00:41:46.519
of watched a lot of Thistle games when I was maybe.
1036
00:41:46.280 --> 00:41:48.360
8, 9 and 10 I started playing amateur.
1037
00:41:48.119 --> 00:41:52.559
Football but I've never really been in many games at
1038
00:41:52.599 --> 00:41:56.420
Celtic but probably probably the first proper game I remember
1039
00:41:56.440 --> 00:41:58.960
like going in really loving was the game 2 you
1040
00:41:58.980 --> 00:41:59.980
scored in.
1041
00:41:59.960 --> 00:42:02.699
That temporary stand for the Liverpool game Liverpool.
1042
00:42:02.670 --> 00:42:05.679
Aye 2-2 I was there aye just You weren't in
1043
00:42:05.699 --> 00:42:07.280
the temporary stand were you?
1044
00:42:07.300 --> 00:42:08.449
Aye I was Were you?
1045
00:42:08.590 --> 00:42:10.789
We were behind the goal and you put the penalty
1046
00:42:10.829 --> 00:42:14.889
in off the bar because I remember I remember going
1047
00:42:15.050 --> 00:42:17.739
ah fucking 90 minutes and McManaman's picked up the ball
1048
00:42:17.760 --> 00:42:19.440
to this day it's one of the best goals I've
1049
00:42:19.500 --> 00:42:22.119
ever seen and look Michael Owen scoring do you know
1050
00:42:22.139 --> 00:42:22.500
what I mean?
1051
00:42:22.539 --> 00:42:24.159
Scored that early on didn't he?
1052
00:42:24.380 --> 00:42:28.349
I was there I loved going to the Champions League
1053
00:42:28.369 --> 00:42:30.829
games under Martyn O'Neill because I fell in with a
1054
00:42:30.829 --> 00:42:33.070
group of boys from Dunbarton who were just normal punters,
1055
00:42:33.309 --> 00:42:35.050
they were all mad Celtic fans and that was at
1056
00:42:35.070 --> 00:42:36.679
the time when you could queue up for the Champions
1057
00:42:36.699 --> 00:42:38.389
League tickets, you didn't have a season book, you just
1058
00:42:38.409 --> 00:42:41.300
queued up for the tickets, you know.
1059
00:42:41.980 --> 00:42:44.239
On the night? No, you used to do it.
1060
00:42:44.260 --> 00:42:46.619
It was at the start, they would announce the package
1061
00:42:46.820 --> 00:42:48.420
and then they did it, you queued up, there was
1062
00:42:48.440 --> 00:42:50.139
no online, first come, first served.
1063
00:42:50.159 --> 00:42:51.420
We used to come up to the training room, we
1064
00:42:51.440 --> 00:42:55.110
obviously had changed there and trained at Barrowfield and the
1065
00:42:55.199 --> 00:42:58.159
queues would be right down past the school or along
1066
00:42:58.199 --> 00:42:59.099
the road so.
1067
00:42:58.920 --> 00:43:00.940
You would go up there and queue queue for a
1068
00:43:00.980 --> 00:43:03.199
couple of hours you'd get the three and it was
1069
00:43:03.219 --> 00:43:06.840
like £ 90 back then so I remember you know like
1070
00:43:06.880 --> 00:43:11.539
that the Lyon Bayern Munich game because I still quite
1071
00:43:11.559 --> 00:43:13.139
proud of Adrian Dunham for a time and I remember
1072
00:43:13.659 --> 00:43:15.230
when I thought when I retired I was like he's
1073
00:43:15.250 --> 00:43:17.889
the fucking German McNamara and Adrian Dunham was like Jackie
1074
00:43:17.909 --> 00:43:20.880
McNamara one of my favourite football players because I remember
1075
00:43:20.920 --> 00:43:22.639
you were playing left back in the Champions League so
1076
00:43:22.659 --> 00:43:24.480
stuff like that you know like with Big Sutton just
1077
00:43:24.980 --> 00:43:27.920
chesting every body for 60 yards and all that that
1078
00:43:27.960 --> 00:43:31.219
was a the UV game no I wasnae I wasnae
1079
00:43:31.400 --> 00:43:33.389
I didn't even make any of those games but I
1080
00:43:33.409 --> 00:43:37.510
was there those two seasons after seen us beat Barcelona
1081
00:43:37.530 --> 00:43:39.989
twice I was there I was in the Barcelona end
1082
00:43:40.369 --> 00:43:43.369
for the game where Thompson scored where everybody gets sent
1083
00:43:43.429 --> 00:43:46.329
off and it was chaos because my mate runs an
1084
00:43:46.349 --> 00:43:49.230
Irish pub in Barcelona so he got his tickets and
1085
00:43:49.250 --> 00:43:50.909
that was Incredible.
1086
00:43:50.929 --> 00:43:53.260
That's the best You'll Never Walk Alone.
1087
00:43:53.199 --> 00:43:54.880
I've ever heard in my life because that was, they
1088
00:43:54.920 --> 00:43:57.960
dedicated that to the people of the Madrid bombings taking
1089
00:43:58.000 --> 00:44:01.239
place that day and it was lit even now the
1090
00:44:01.260 --> 00:44:04.260
hairs on my neck are standing up and because you're
1091
00:44:04.380 --> 00:44:07.159
in that little pocket just away from it you can
1092
00:44:07.260 --> 00:44:09.900
really hear the magnitude of how it goes.
1093
00:44:09.940 --> 00:44:11.719
Did you say you were in the bus or anything?
1094
00:44:11.739 --> 00:44:14.340
I was in the little corner, aye, aye, Niall Dempsey,
1095
00:44:14.360 --> 00:44:15.860
not Niall Dempsey I worked with him but it's Brian's son,
1096
00:44:15.889 --> 00:44:19.130
Niall something Niall who runs the Michael Collins pub in
1097
00:44:19.150 --> 00:44:20.809
Barcelona he got his tickets and we were in me
1098
00:44:20.829 --> 00:44:23.630
and my mate Nicky fucking grabbing each other it was
1099
00:44:24.010 --> 00:44:27.829
really emotional and I actually had my 21st round about
1100
00:44:27.849 --> 00:44:30.639
then and I took my da as a surprise to
1101
00:44:30.659 --> 00:44:33.079
the away leg so I was in.
1102
00:44:35.440 --> 00:44:36.159
The camp now for.
1103
00:44:36.079 --> 00:44:40.960
The Nile Nile game with Marshall and John Kennedy and
1104
00:44:41.000 --> 00:44:42.869
Diddy the Gat got his ticket as well so I
1105
00:44:42.889 --> 00:44:44.989
got two tickets for Niall but I knew Diddy from
1106
00:44:45.010 --> 00:44:48.550
when I worked in well I because I worked on
1107
00:44:48.570 --> 00:44:51.269
Cruise and I DJed on Trash so he used to
1108
00:44:51.289 --> 00:44:53.849
come in he used to come in to buy Cruise
1109
00:44:53.949 --> 00:44:54.889
and Trash he used.
1110
00:44:54.809 --> 00:44:58.670
To come in to buy women's shoes for women.
1111
00:45:00.090 --> 00:45:02.920
So we went down to that hotel his arse hotel
1112
00:45:02.940 --> 00:45:03.920
remember me.
1113
00:45:03.900 --> 00:45:06.539
And my dad that's fucking 25 euro for a vodka.
1114
00:45:06.400 --> 00:45:09.159
And orange and we went and got so I didn't
1115
00:45:09.179 --> 00:45:10.780
need this ticket but obviously he did he's got us
1116
00:45:10.840 --> 00:45:12.820
a ticket and me and my dad went tell you
1117
00:45:12.840 --> 00:45:14.900
what we'll do we'll just get to the first person
1118
00:45:14.940 --> 00:45:17.739
that I saw We'd always love to find out who
1119
00:45:17.760 --> 00:45:19.679
that would be, but as we got outside the stadiums, I.
1120
00:45:19.659 --> 00:45:21.019
Was like, mate, you get a spare ticket, I'm right here,
1121
00:45:21.039 --> 00:45:23.119
just take that one. And they're like, what? Seriously, I'm
1122
00:45:23.159 --> 00:45:25.940
right here, just take it, mate. So that was good.
1123
00:45:26.000 --> 00:45:28.500
And then I was at the other Barcelona game. I
1124
00:45:28.539 --> 00:45:31.139
was at the Tony Watt. I was there for that.
1125
00:45:31.300 --> 00:45:33.619
You were there as well, weren't you? Main stand, we
1126
00:45:33.639 --> 00:45:35.519
were across. I took my son. You took your boy
1127
00:45:35.539 --> 00:45:36.260
and I took my boy.
1128
00:45:36.320 --> 00:45:40.199
I had to take my son out. He was, obviously
1129
00:45:40.239 --> 00:45:41.800
I'd never seen him. He was too young to see
1130
00:45:41.840 --> 00:45:44.449
me playing at Celtic. I took him to that game
1131
00:45:44.469 --> 00:45:47.809
and he loved Messi. and then we're up a few
1132
00:45:47.869 --> 00:45:51.639
of my mates just at half when we scored first
1133
00:45:51.900 --> 00:45:55.039
and he starts creeping in the air because Messi's getting
1134
00:45:55.059 --> 00:45:58.480
beat he wanted Messi to win I was like that
1135
00:45:58.539 --> 00:46:00.679
I was raging I was like that at half time
1136
00:46:01.119 --> 00:46:03.619
the noise he's just scared of the noise and then
1137
00:46:03.699 --> 00:46:06.130
when Tony Watts scored the whole place I had to
1138
00:46:06.150 --> 00:46:09.449
take him out and then he scored Your dad's been
1139
00:46:09.489 --> 00:46:12.409
here for 10 years, he's like that, sitting there with
1140
00:46:12.570 --> 00:46:14.210
all you boys in the car, took him out of
1141
00:46:14.230 --> 00:46:16.449
the car park and waited for everybody, and he's sitting
1142
00:46:16.469 --> 00:46:18.070
like that, I said, I'm not taking you back here again,
1143
00:46:18.630 --> 00:46:25.110
I don't care, I hate them, just sitting.
1144
00:46:22.690 --> 00:46:26.750
Like that, then Messi scored, made it 2-1.
1145
00:46:26.809 --> 00:46:29.260
That was incredible.
1146
00:46:29.340 --> 00:46:32.119
But because you don't go often, it's always a real
1147
00:46:32.139 --> 00:46:34.639
privilege for me when you do go, but I used
1148
00:46:34.659 --> 00:46:37.969
to love going at Setanta, just being the you built
1149
00:46:38.030 --> 00:46:39.590
on the gantry just logging the game because you were.
1150
00:46:39.510 --> 00:46:42.190
Just Was Burley at Satanta with you? He was, Butler,
1151
00:46:42.289 --> 00:46:43.530
aye Uncle Butler.
1152
00:46:43.429 --> 00:46:46.309
Before his American accent Aye.
1153
00:46:46.269 --> 00:46:48.820
Well what's funny is we were just chatting you know
1154
00:46:48.840 --> 00:46:50.920
like sometimes you make a bit of criticism if you're
1155
00:46:50.940 --> 00:46:54.659
speaking out on certain things and I remember I remember
1156
00:46:54.739 --> 00:47:00.239
I remember the I remember the drama when Burley was
1157
00:47:00.369 --> 00:47:02.409
criticised because when we were going to Nightsuit with Burley
1158
00:47:02.429 --> 00:47:03.969
I was like I used to wear the long-sleeved select
1159
00:47:03.989 --> 00:47:05.429
top and all that you know it was Craig Burley
1160
00:47:05.469 --> 00:47:07.949
and like And then he's fucking like, we're the right lads,
1161
00:47:07.969 --> 00:47:11.050
you know, him and Keegs would go, and I remember,
1162
00:47:11.070 --> 00:47:12.210
who was it that.
1163
00:47:12.110 --> 00:47:12.619
Was phoning him?
1164
00:47:13.590 --> 00:47:17.389
Paul Lambert was phoning, we'd go for a drink after
1165
00:47:18.010 --> 00:47:20.329
the live programme, we'd go out on a Sunday, and
1166
00:47:20.349 --> 00:47:22.070
we'd go into the little conference room, STV, and there'd
1167
00:47:22.090 --> 00:47:22.650
be wine and.
1168
00:47:22.590 --> 00:47:25.449
Beer and all that, and fucking, Paul, what do you
1169
00:47:25.469 --> 00:47:26.050
want me to do?
1170
00:47:26.710 --> 00:47:28.309
And the manager's not happy about some of the things,
1171
00:47:28.349 --> 00:47:30.449
because I remember at one point, Martin Neil didn't speak
1172
00:47:30.469 --> 00:47:33.920
to the reporters for about a month or two, there
1173
00:47:33.940 --> 00:47:35.440
was like a mad fallout and all that, so it was,
1174
00:47:36.449 --> 00:47:38.449
kind of brilliant I love a gossip man this is
1175
00:47:38.469 --> 00:47:40.570
amazing do you know what I mean then you'd see
1176
00:47:40.590 --> 00:47:42.389
Neil Lennon out fucking in Ashton Lane do you know
1177
00:47:42.409 --> 00:47:43.269
what I mean through the week and.
1178
00:47:43.230 --> 00:47:44.809
Stuff like that she'd been out a few times with
1179
00:47:44.829 --> 00:47:47.670
Burley aye loads of times aye to ever put his
1180
00:47:47.730 --> 00:47:48.650
teeth in your drink.
1181
00:47:48.969 --> 00:47:50.510
No he never did that no because I think at
1182
00:47:50.550 --> 00:47:57.300
that point he'd got implants because he'd finished playing he'd implants.
1183
00:47:56.579 --> 00:47:59.260
He'd done it to me one night in TGI's with
1184
00:47:59.460 --> 00:48:03.320
the cocktails and I'm sitting there and I've finished my
1185
00:48:03.340 --> 00:48:05.800
drink and I was like his teeth's hitting my mouth
1186
00:48:06.659 --> 00:48:08.300
I was like, and all the boys, they all knew
1187
00:48:08.380 --> 00:48:09.880
it was going on. I was like, because that was
1188
00:48:09.920 --> 00:48:12.199
his party piece. He'd either do that or put in
1189
00:48:12.219 --> 00:48:15.500
someone's sandwich or roll. I was like, you're fucking bastard.
1190
00:48:15.519 --> 00:48:17.599
We're in TGIs in Glasgow. So I took it out
1191
00:48:17.619 --> 00:48:19.969
of my glass and went, as if I flung it
1192
00:48:20.010 --> 00:48:24.050
across TGIs. And he's like, you're a fucking wee bastard.
1193
00:48:24.769 --> 00:48:27.969
And everybody, all the staff, but I'd kept it. He
1194
00:48:27.989 --> 00:48:29.289
thought I'd flung him out of the air. He's like,
1195
00:48:29.349 --> 00:48:31.829
I'm fucking going home. I put my teeth up naked.
1196
00:48:31.849 --> 00:48:38.650
Some character, he's hated me out. By the way, what
1197
00:48:38.829 --> 00:48:41.889
was funny about Burley, for me, because obviously you just think,
1198
00:48:42.469 --> 00:48:45.380
he's quite cantankerous, the big man, very antagonistic.
1199
00:48:45.880 --> 00:48:47.880
So people would come up, they'd be like, oh, fucking
1200
00:48:47.920 --> 00:48:49.940
big man, fucking love you. I know you love the Celtic.
1201
00:48:49.960 --> 00:48:52.639
And they'd be like, I don't support Celtic, mate. And
1202
00:48:52.659 --> 00:48:54.210
they'd be like, what? He went, I don't support Celtic,
1203
00:48:54.230 --> 00:48:56.969
I support Chelsea, mate. I played for him for 10 years,
1204
00:48:57.110 --> 00:49:00.170
he would just say things like that. Conversation stopper.
1205
00:49:00.230 --> 00:49:03.070
You would just see him, do you know what I mean?
1206
00:49:03.199 --> 00:49:04.119
I'd start a fight.
1207
00:49:04.739 --> 00:49:06.719
I think he was like that when he first came
1208
00:49:06.739 --> 00:49:09.800
to Sutton. Sutton was like that and he was shy.
1209
00:49:09.820 --> 00:49:11.760
So he would go and stand there and people would
1210
00:49:11.780 --> 00:49:13.889
come up to him and he'd be rude or that.
1211
00:49:13.949 --> 00:49:16.869
I'm going, he's going to start selling fans or whatever,
1212
00:49:16.909 --> 00:49:19.329
start a fight. And he didn't know what he engaged,
1213
00:49:19.369 --> 00:49:21.809
he'd just stand there at the pugging machine or looking
1214
00:49:21.849 --> 00:49:23.050
at that or quiet.
1215
00:49:23.269 --> 00:49:25.269
I think that's difficult for people as well just in
1216
00:49:25.309 --> 00:49:27.889
regard that, because you do, if you think, when you
1217
00:49:27.909 --> 00:49:30.389
see people, whether it's online or obviously football is different,
1218
00:49:30.429 --> 00:49:32.070
but you see them, you think you know them.
1219
00:49:32.510 --> 00:49:35.539
So I think they call that parasocial. And you get it,
1220
00:49:35.809 --> 00:49:37.670
like just what we were discussing, a lot of people
1221
00:49:37.690 --> 00:49:39.070
are not particularly outgoing.
1222
00:49:39.090 --> 00:49:41.159
They don't, like talking to people, they might be a
1223
00:49:41.179 --> 00:49:44.630
bit shy or insular, it's the same sort of thing,
1224
00:49:44.670 --> 00:49:46.829
so it's kind of, I do get it, do you
1225
00:49:46.849 --> 00:49:48.869
know what I mean, and people obviously are like, ah,
1226
00:49:48.909 --> 00:49:50.590
big man, and a couple of times they do say, well, I.
1227
00:49:50.530 --> 00:49:55.070
Mean, I don't support selling, and you're.
1228
00:49:53.809 --> 00:49:55.869
Like, fucking hell. Shut the conversation.
1229
00:49:55.909 --> 00:49:58.179
When I had, what's really funny is I hadn't spoken
1230
00:49:58.280 --> 00:50:00.239
to him for months at one point, nearly a year
1231
00:50:00.260 --> 00:50:02.940
just working on something different, and then I'd had this fight,
1232
00:50:02.960 --> 00:50:05.119
and it was the office gossip, and I was straight
1233
00:50:05.139 --> 00:50:08.050
to the phone, Tell your Uncle Walter about what happened
1234
00:50:08.070 --> 00:50:10.340
straight on the phone, just desperate for the gossip.
1235
00:50:11.440 --> 00:50:13.559
Well, you've been a great guest, mate. We're going to
1236
00:50:13.579 --> 00:50:18.679
finish with some recommendations. Our last guest, Frank Goholy, recommends
1237
00:50:18.719 --> 00:50:19.860
an album, a song and a film.
1238
00:50:20.119 --> 00:50:23.699
Okay. So, his album's Hunky Dory by David Bowie. Right.
1239
00:50:24.590 --> 00:50:26.730
I actually listened to this on the way home the
1240
00:50:26.750 --> 00:50:28.170
last time. There's a lot of songs on it that
1241
00:50:28.190 --> 00:50:30.530
I know about. Yeah, I like it by Bowie. His
1242
00:50:30.650 --> 00:50:34.989
song is from Lindisfarne. Winter song. What is that, about
1243
00:50:35.030 --> 00:50:37.969
classical music or something? No, do you not remember, Gazza
1244
00:50:37.989 --> 00:50:40.570
did a song with him, Fogging the Time, Lindisfarne. Okay.
1245
00:50:40.989 --> 00:50:42.809
It's not Fogging the Time, is it? It's not, it's
1246
00:50:42.969 --> 00:50:45.920
a song called Winter Song. Winter Song. And his film
1247
00:50:46.059 --> 00:50:49.860
is Dr. Zhivago, an old classic, which I've not watched. Yeah,
1248
00:50:49.900 --> 00:50:51.039
I've not watched either.
1249
00:50:51.500 --> 00:50:53.139
I remember the thing we were making a reference to, Dr.
1250
00:50:53.159 --> 00:50:56.550
Zhivago and Trainspotting, I'm sure, or something like that. Right, right.
1251
00:50:56.949 --> 00:50:59.130
So I've not seen it. So can you recommend to
1252
00:50:59.170 --> 00:51:01.449
our next guest an album, a song and a film?
1253
00:51:01.929 --> 00:51:04.869
The album I would go for Future Islands I think
1254
00:51:04.909 --> 00:51:07.269
it's called Singles is the name of the album that's
1255
00:51:07.289 --> 00:51:11.449
the one that's got Seasons Lighthouse Back in the Tallgrass
1256
00:51:11.469 --> 00:51:12.900
you know the band Future Islands the guy that does
1257
00:51:12.920 --> 00:51:15.260
the mad dancing he was on Jules Holland a few
1258
00:51:15.280 --> 00:51:18.900
years ago they went they're tremendous I've seen them Future
1259
00:51:18.960 --> 00:51:22.059
Islands oh as soon as you see the guy dancing
1260
00:51:22.880 --> 00:51:25.130
I watched the one Jules Holland's hitting on me about
1261
00:51:25.650 --> 00:51:28.090
nearly like 10 years ago, and like, everyone was howling,
1262
00:51:28.239 --> 00:51:30.280
at the way this guy was dancing, but he puts
1263
00:51:30.320 --> 00:51:31.760
his heart and soul into it, and he does like
1264
00:51:31.780 --> 00:51:33.940
mad death growls, so sometimes he just won't sing the lyric,
1265
00:51:34.019 --> 00:51:36.590
and he's, you can't take your eyes off him, and
1266
00:51:36.610 --> 00:51:38.409
they've got a few absolute bangers, and I've been to
1267
00:51:38.429 --> 00:51:40.469
see them twice, saw them at the Barrowlands, and I
1268
00:51:40.510 --> 00:51:46.030
saw them at the bandstand, they are brilliant, absolutely brilliant.
1269
00:51:46.110 --> 00:51:50.300
My song would be Rain In The Summertime by Mike
1270
00:51:50.360 --> 00:51:53.179
Peters and The Alarm, so they are a Welsh punk
1271
00:51:53.219 --> 00:51:56.500
rock band, Mike Peters just passed away recently, but they
1272
00:51:56.519 --> 00:51:59.880
opened I think 22 times for U2, they opened for
1273
00:51:59.900 --> 00:52:02.219
The Stones and all that, they were kind of like
1274
00:52:02.239 --> 00:52:06.329
the Welsh equivalent of U2, and they had a couple
1275
00:52:06.409 --> 00:52:07.889
of hits in the 80s, but I've been to see
1276
00:52:07.909 --> 00:52:10.159
them when I was about five year old with my
1277
00:52:10.199 --> 00:52:11.460
brother at the Barrowlands what's.
1278
00:52:11.320 --> 00:52:12.019
The song called again?
1279
00:52:12.179 --> 00:52:13.940
Called Rain in the Summertime that might have been their
1280
00:52:13.980 --> 00:52:16.480
highest charting hit but it's a brilliant song and I
1281
00:52:16.480 --> 00:52:20.010
always think as a Scottish person you cannot help but
1282
00:52:20.070 --> 00:52:23.409
love that relate to it definitely and my film my
1283
00:52:23.510 --> 00:52:28.369
film would be Heat Michael Mann 95 De Niro and
1284
00:52:28.389 --> 00:52:31.630
Pacino and for me I mean I've had that in
1285
00:52:31.650 --> 00:52:33.510
VHS I've had it in DVD I've had it in
1286
00:52:33.530 --> 00:52:36.099
Blu-ray and I've got it on my Apple my films
1287
00:52:36.119 --> 00:52:39.679
because I watch it They're doing a sequel to that?
1288
00:52:39.699 --> 00:52:44.219
They've written, yeah, so Michael Mann has written actually a novel,
1289
00:52:44.380 --> 00:52:46.380
so I think he always wanted to do like a sequel,
1290
00:52:46.480 --> 00:52:48.210
and then he said that when he started fleshing it out,
1291
00:52:48.940 --> 00:52:51.360
he's actually ended up writing a proper novel, so my
1292
00:52:51.400 --> 00:52:54.420
mate read it, we're big Heat fans, so I downloaded
1293
00:52:54.460 --> 00:52:56.800
it on the Kindle, and I was like, first couple
1294
00:52:56.860 --> 00:53:01.059
of pages, it's set right in the aftermath of the film,
1295
00:53:01.800 --> 00:53:03.380
but also then there's a bit of an origin story,
1296
00:53:03.400 --> 00:53:05.369
so it kind of goes back and forward, So I
1297
00:53:05.389 --> 00:53:07.309
was a bit like that, alright, okay, mate, we get it,
1298
00:53:07.329 --> 00:53:10.079
we get it, because it keeps referencing things that happened
1299
00:53:10.119 --> 00:53:12.360
at the end of the film, but see, after that,
1300
00:53:12.400 --> 00:53:13.960
I got in it, it's like a big crime novel,
1301
00:53:14.039 --> 00:53:16.019
it's like 300 or 400 pages, it's brilliant.
1302
00:53:16.280 --> 00:53:17.340
Just like a right, good.
1303
00:53:17.380 --> 00:53:21.840
Enjoyable sort of crime caper, so I'm looking forward to it.
1304
00:53:21.860 --> 00:53:23.800
I think DiCaprio.
1305
00:53:23.159 --> 00:53:26.949
Plays the Val Kilmer role, he's the guy that escapes,
1306
00:53:27.010 --> 00:53:30.409
so DiCaprio plays him, and I think Christian Bale plays like...
1307
00:53:31.400 --> 00:53:34.199
the young Al Pacino role as the Vincent Hanna, the
1308
00:53:34.400 --> 00:53:34.880
cop and all.
1309
00:53:34.840 --> 00:53:36.210
That, so we'll see how it pans out.
1310
00:53:36.230 --> 00:53:39.900
Alright, good recommendation mate, great guest, thanks for coming on.
1311
00:53:39.909 --> 00:53:40.940
Thanks for having me on.
1
00:00:04.410 --> 00:00:07.570
Welcome to another episode of Not Another Football Podcast with myself,
2
00:00:07.650 --> 00:00:11.150
Simon Donnelly and Jackie McNamara. And we're delighted our next
3
00:00:11.189 --> 00:00:13.890
guest is none other than James Gardner, a.k.a.
4
00:00:14.089 --> 00:00:16.649
Comedy James. Not as delighted as me.
5
00:00:17.030 --> 00:00:21.530
I cannae wait to tell my dad. Honestly, my favourite
6
00:00:21.649 --> 00:00:24.210
ever Celtic player is Jackie. It's been documented, I've been
7
00:00:24.230 --> 00:00:29.000
on Off The Ball. I remember singing... his name is
8
00:00:29.050 --> 00:00:32.149
McNamara on the eve of the Scottish Cup final you
9
00:00:32.170 --> 00:00:33.549
came off the bench and I was with a group
10
00:00:33.570 --> 00:00:34.829
of boys in the baton and he scored?
11
00:00:34.850 --> 00:00:35.609
Aye so they when I.
12
00:00:35.609 --> 00:00:38.590
Started I'm just like his name is McNamara they're all
13
00:00:38.630 --> 00:00:40.950
like who the fuck you're a pal singing McNamara the
14
00:00:40.990 --> 00:00:42.289
next day he's come off the bench and scored and
15
00:00:42.310 --> 00:00:45.090
I was like see I told you and you but
16
00:00:45.149 --> 00:00:46.450
you were the first you know what I mean it's
17
00:00:46.469 --> 00:00:49.990
like sitting with my wife and my ex-girlfriend you know
18
00:00:50.030 --> 00:00:50.320
what I.
19
00:00:50.270 --> 00:00:52.100
Mean you used to be because.
20
00:00:51.939 --> 00:00:56.520
I was there before him You were my favourite player, aye,
21
00:00:56.770 --> 00:00:59.170
and then Jackie's come in and I think it was
22
00:00:59.189 --> 00:01:02.850
the women's answer season, the old attacking midfielder, so I
23
00:01:02.909 --> 00:01:04.689
had to bomb you, but listen, that's just what happens,
24
00:01:04.709 --> 00:01:09.150
you just need to upgrade from time to time, you know.
25
00:01:08.989 --> 00:01:09.930
What I mean?
26
00:01:10.250 --> 00:01:12.829
Delighted to be here, I would never have thought my
27
00:01:12.859 --> 00:01:14.799
15-year-old would say, you've won a podcast with me today,
28
00:01:15.180 --> 00:01:16.719
so thanks for having me, aye.
29
00:01:17.430 --> 00:01:19.709
And the reason we've got you is because you're along
30
00:01:19.750 --> 00:01:23.090
the road at the Fringe at the moment. How's things
31
00:01:23.129 --> 00:01:23.629
going with that?
32
00:01:23.950 --> 00:01:27.689
It's going really well. I've sold a run out in advance.
33
00:01:27.769 --> 00:01:30.329
Are you on every day? Every day.
34
00:01:30.370 --> 00:01:32.939
I've just been doing an 11-day run that I'm doing
35
00:01:32.959 --> 00:01:34.459
because that was all my girlfriend allowed me to do.
36
00:01:35.299 --> 00:01:37.260
So you can go for a week. And I was
37
00:01:37.280 --> 00:01:39.620
telling the boys, I'll probably stretch it for up to
38
00:01:39.620 --> 00:01:40.680
10 days.
39
00:01:41.599 --> 00:01:43.079
But I think just with all the stuff I've been
40
00:01:43.099 --> 00:01:45.760
doing on social media, this is my fourth year doing
41
00:01:45.819 --> 00:01:46.939
a solo show at the Fringe.
42
00:01:46.980 --> 00:01:47.120
Yeah.
43
00:01:47.640 --> 00:01:50.420
You've kind of got four years worth of people coming.
44
00:01:50.219 --> 00:01:51.939
To see you, buying, then you've got all the social
45
00:01:51.959 --> 00:01:55.180
media stuff, lots of gigs in Glasgow, so my run,
46
00:01:55.319 --> 00:01:57.299
our show run sold out, and we've put on double
47
00:01:57.319 --> 00:01:59.879
the amount of tickets, and they've sold out as well,
48
00:01:59.900 --> 00:02:02.500
so it's been brilliant, it's been really, really good, so
49
00:02:02.519 --> 00:02:03.060
you're kind.
50
00:02:02.920 --> 00:02:04.959
Of going like that, is this it?
51
00:02:05.000 --> 00:02:06.829
But you know, I don't know if it's like when
52
00:02:06.840 --> 00:02:08.689
you've got momentum and fit, but you're kind of thinking,
53
00:02:09.370 --> 00:02:10.949
it might not last, so let's try and take advantage
54
00:02:10.990 --> 00:02:12.030
of it just now, you.
55
00:02:11.969 --> 00:02:14.969
Know what I mean? I mean, listen, I've obviously followed
56
00:02:14.990 --> 00:02:16.110
you on Instagram.
57
00:02:15.689 --> 00:02:18.240
For the last few years as well, We did a
58
00:02:18.259 --> 00:02:20.900
wee project with a comedy night member.
59
00:02:20.520 --> 00:02:23.560
At the pub a few years back. You've really gathered
60
00:02:23.620 --> 00:02:25.740
pace with the whole thing, haven't you? I think so.
61
00:02:25.780 --> 00:02:27.990
I think actually it's been one of the things I feel,
62
00:02:28.310 --> 00:02:30.969
because I kind of see myself first and foremost as
63
00:02:31.069 --> 00:02:31.949
a stand-up, but.
64
00:02:31.870 --> 00:02:34.729
I love doing the football stuff. I grew up watching
65
00:02:34.750 --> 00:02:37.129
All In Excuses. I don't really like comedy, so I
66
00:02:37.150 --> 00:02:38.590
don't watch comedy.
67
00:02:38.610 --> 00:02:40.289
People are like, oh, have you seen Daniel Kitson? I
68
00:02:40.289 --> 00:02:41.590
was like, did he play up front with Hartson at
69
00:02:41.610 --> 00:02:42.030
West Ham?
70
00:02:42.090 --> 00:02:42.389
I was like.
71
00:02:42.969 --> 00:02:45.110
I don't really I don't really watch I only watched
72
00:02:45.129 --> 00:02:48.060
my first Kevin Bridges special which was that long overdue
73
00:02:48.090 --> 00:02:51.300
catch up watched that I think about two years ago
74
00:02:51.340 --> 00:02:52.199
or a year and a half it was the first
75
00:02:52.219 --> 00:02:54.139
time I'd watched it it was incredible but I just
76
00:02:54.159 --> 00:02:57.300
don't really I'm not into watching stand up no I
77
00:02:57.379 --> 00:02:59.479
fucking hate it man I just can't go a lot
78
00:02:59.539 --> 00:03:01.000
of comedians either do you know what I mean because
79
00:03:01.479 --> 00:03:04.310
I just grew up playing football I'd rather be about
80
00:03:04.340 --> 00:03:07.229
the boys and I just watch old Celtic videos on
81
00:03:07.270 --> 00:03:09.590
YouTube and Tyson Fury fights that's it those are my
82
00:03:09.610 --> 00:03:14.169
special interests so erm So I'm not a big comedy
83
00:03:14.210 --> 00:03:15.939
fan in that regard, but I grew up watching On
84
00:03:15.960 --> 00:03:19.060
An Excuse, that was my, Johnny Watson, probably a hero.
85
00:03:19.099 --> 00:03:21.419
Followed me on Instagram recently, and I was like, oh
86
00:03:21.439 --> 00:03:21.840
my God.
87
00:03:22.879 --> 00:03:25.689
So, you know, just doing the kind of, or his
88
00:03:25.770 --> 00:03:29.490
daft voices, you know, he would put on the Frankie,
89
00:03:29.509 --> 00:03:31.110
you know, where's the birds and all that, and just,
90
00:03:31.599 --> 00:03:34.759
Just everything. So that kind of, for me, is what
91
00:03:34.919 --> 00:03:35.659
I love doing as well.
92
00:03:35.680 --> 00:03:36.740
Is that what got you into it then?
93
00:03:36.759 --> 00:03:39.659
Because we've had a few comedians on, and I'm always curious,
94
00:03:39.879 --> 00:03:42.539
because I think it's one of the hardest things to do, possibly.
95
00:03:43.240 --> 00:03:44.900
How did you get into it? Was it just through that?
96
00:03:45.180 --> 00:03:46.960
No, I think, do you know what it was? So
97
00:03:46.979 --> 00:03:49.520
my older brother, Alexander, is a really important person in
98
00:03:49.560 --> 00:03:52.969
my life. He's profoundly disabled. He's got quadriplegic cerebral palsy.
99
00:03:52.990 --> 00:03:54.949
He's not a verbal, but he communicates with his eyes,
100
00:03:54.969 --> 00:03:56.330
looks up for yes, looks down for no. And my
101
00:03:56.629 --> 00:04:01.280
sister and I, as well as my parents, we're largely
102
00:04:01.300 --> 00:04:04.900
responsible for his care for the majority of our lives.
103
00:04:05.360 --> 00:04:09.009
So making my brother laugh by putting on daft voices
104
00:04:09.050 --> 00:04:11.050
and all that, he would always start laughing and that
105
00:04:11.090 --> 00:04:11.729
was always.
106
00:04:11.509 --> 00:04:12.050
Kind of my buzz.
107
00:04:12.069 --> 00:04:14.930
And then to communicate for him, you're having to interpret
108
00:04:14.949 --> 00:04:17.829
what he's saying, repeat it back to him. So you're
109
00:04:17.889 --> 00:04:20.100
talking all the time. So it's kind of like if
110
00:04:20.129 --> 00:04:22.660
you're not talking, you're kind of actively ignoring him. So
111
00:04:22.680 --> 00:04:23.920
I'm always like, you're all right, you're all right.
112
00:04:23.939 --> 00:04:25.800
Do you need a drink? Do you want anything?
113
00:04:26.040 --> 00:04:30.379
So I think that kind of, performing was always there
114
00:04:30.399 --> 00:04:32.850
and obviously probably not had enough attention as a result
115
00:04:33.889 --> 00:04:36.029
of that. That's kind of what happens in households when
116
00:04:36.050 --> 00:04:39.310
you've got somebody who's got complex needs. So I think
117
00:04:39.370 --> 00:04:43.610
that desire to be fucking loved and to have an
118
00:04:43.689 --> 00:04:46.519
audience and to be funny was always there and then
119
00:04:46.540 --> 00:04:50.259
just I think, you know, somebody when I lived in
120
00:04:50.279 --> 00:04:52.180
London first time round, somebody said to me, I've done
121
00:04:52.199 --> 00:04:54.379
this comedy course, you should do it. So I went
122
00:04:54.399 --> 00:04:58.089
and did the stand-up course about 15 years ago and
123
00:04:58.110 --> 00:05:01.050
you graduate from it, well, like a showcase gig, you do,
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you've built up like a seven minute set, but I
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never followed up, after that I did two gigs, and
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I went to the Philippines to play football, and then
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I never ever did comedy again for another, like, eight,
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nine years, so it wasn't until.
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I, You went to the Philippines to play football? Aye,
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I went to the Philippines, What was that about?
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So basically, so, I used to DJ at Baton, for years,
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and like Bamboo, because you'd spoke before, so you'd get various, trash,
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Was it trash? I used to DJ in Trash on
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a Tuesday Good night Tuesday night I saw no big
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hearts and all that I know a lot of Because
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you've done various stuff I've guest listed half the SBL
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into nightclubs you know so one of the boys I
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used to DJ with a guy called Paul Fox he
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was out in the Philippines running a betting company and
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he phones me up just random I'm living in London
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at this point and he's like listen they've got a
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national football league out here and They're not very good.
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You could maybe get a game.
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What was your background with football then? I would say
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a decent amateur football player. Just a hard worker.
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A very willing cart horse, if you will. Do you
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know what I mean?
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I would say to Jackie in the car over, like,
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fuel sacrifice. I'm just saying I played in the Philippines.
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But I played amateur football from when I was like 15,
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like the grown men. And that was the best learning
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ground because you were playing with some boys that maybe
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played junior, maybe a couple of boys that played lower
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leagues at one stage so they would kind of tell
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you what to do and split defenders and all that
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so I kind of loved the kind of the horrible
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side of the game because I wasn't a very good
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message you know what I mean so anyway I went
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out to the Philippines and kind of sort of blagged
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it a bit and Big Rudy was my manager Brian
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Reed was my manager for a spell so I made
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about four appearances or something over I don't know three
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or four months spell but it was it was brilliant
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brilliant fun came back to London and I was unemployed
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for about six months and then when I was 13
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I moved back in my mom and dad took a
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job with C.R. Smith, keeping the football theme running, and
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I was selling double glazing, commission only double glazing salesman
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for the best part of eight years, and then I
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ended up just basically having a breakdown, man, I was
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working like 80, 90 hours a week at times, commission
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only double glazing sales, I was in my mid to
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late 30s, I was pretty lonely, didn't know that I
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was lonely, I was earning good money, but then because
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I was so unhappy, I was spending loads of money,
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so I lived myself, I bought a one bedroom flat,
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I had the C.R.
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Smith car, the blue and white C.R. Smith car, I
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went and bought myself a Porsche. I loved myself. I
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had two cars. I had no time to drive it.
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I used to drive it.
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I used to take my car out of my wee garage,
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drive it round to Summerson when I grew up, and
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then back in half day and night, put it back in.
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That was me done. £ 600 a month I was paying
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for that. Do you know what I mean? So I
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was drowning in debt. And then I sold my flat,
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paid off my debt, quit my job, and I was like,
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I've been wanting to do comedy for this last eight years.
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So it was always on your mind? It was always
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on my mind, because you always think, I'll get to it,
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I'll do it, I'll do it.
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And I was always working evenings, weekends. I didn't even
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know where to begin. And that's when I started. I
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was 36 and a half and I really started doing comedy.
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And like that was the first eight months before COVID.
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I was just hammering gigs.
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I think I did about 100 gigs near enough in
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that first eight months. And that was kind of it.
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Do you remember your very first one?
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I can remember it. Actually, it was Paisley Road West.
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at a wee pub, Six Rangers pub.
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Aye, aye, Paisley Road West. How did that get done?
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It was, do you know what? What was your material?
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Everybody's rubbish when they first start, like you're absolutely rubbish,
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but you'll get a laugh because most people will go
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up and they'll find something that's a bit funny or
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a bit shocking and, you know, I kind of just
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went up and I was dressed like a drug dealer,
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like a Glasgow drug dealer, just on black night tracky
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bottoms and all that, so for a while, my first
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eight months, that was my hang, I used to go
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up with a, with the sports.
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Gear and all that, and the Yeezys and all that,
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and I'd be like.
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Oh, excuse the drug dealer look and all that, but
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if anyone's looking, you know, just daft stuff like that,
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but that was my very first gig, Sunday night, I
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remember I could do it myself, like dead nervous and
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all that, and you got to do 10 minutes, and
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then you meet other people, and they tell you there's
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a gig here, and there's a gig there, you know,
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and then you kind of start figuring out from there.
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And your first gig, Sink or Swim, did you get
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through it all right?
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Obviously I've worked as a TV presenter for years.
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I used to do the shopping channels.
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I did the Dutch football in Setanta. I presented a
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few games. So I thought I was going to be famous.
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The back story before all that was I was DJing
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from when I was 17 on the tune.
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Did all the different nightclubs and bars.
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And then even when I got a job at Setanta,
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I started off as an assistant producer, doing the match highlights.
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That's by John Hartson and a lot of football guys.
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But I was also going out at night as well.
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So a lot of boys like Scott McDonald would see
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him through the week at Motherwell.
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Then I'd see him on a Saturday night. Do you
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know what I mean?
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So people would be like, he's all right, the big man.
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My mates all played at Motherwell, like Kenny Connolly and
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Mark Reynolds. So they were all there. And it was
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just a brilliant time. So I was always knocking about
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the town. I wanted to be a presenter. I got
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to present a couple of games. Did the Dutch football
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and stuff like that. Moved down to London after we
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went bust because I thought, I'm going to be famous here.
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I'm just remembering as we're speaking, did you stick stuff up?
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It was a shopping channel, I remember.
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Aye. Do you put stuff on your Instagram with that? Aye. Honestly,
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when I tell people what I've done.
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So do you think you need to have something in
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your makeup then just to kind of shrug it off
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as a comedian?
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I don't know. I think.
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So I think there's two types of people who do
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stand-up comedies. There's your extrovert and your classic extrovert. I'm like, me, me,
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I'll do it. Even when you're going to a wedding
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and somebody's doing the speech, even if you don't know them,
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I'm like, listen, if you're struggling with me, I'll go
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and do the speech for you.
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Then you've maybe got the opposite.
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I think the other comedians are what I would call
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extroverted introverts. So a lot of comics cannae have the
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cat with you.
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Before the gig. They're all like, I don't want to
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talk to you. I want to say John Gagan.
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Well, a lot of them, I would say 70, 80%
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of them, I like that. They need the space that
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the stage offers to kind of give them that space
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to go and be who they want to be and
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they come alive. But I find all that really hard
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because my personality is big and bold and brash and just,
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you know, amateur football. So you come in, what's happening boys?
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And I've been doing gigs with this guy for two months,
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he's not saying hello to me.
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So then in my head, fuck you and all that.
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Do you know what I mean? You've got to realise
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that not everyone's like that. You know what I mean?
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It's so weird, isn't it?
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I went to Dubai with Joe and John was doing the,
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we'd go over to Dubai every year.
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It's like a Scotland, England thing for three or four days.
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You walked past me on a flight. Did we? I
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did say hello. Recently? No, it was about seven, eight
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years ago. I was going back to the Philippines for
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a testimonial. Macca was doing the.
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The after dinner at that one so that was a
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few years ago but John's been over at it but
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John's I've not been to that.
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One he's a nervous have you not been invited for
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that one no I've been invited it's hard to just
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I don't like flying oh.
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Do you not but neither does John so he doesn't
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like the flying he's quite a nervous character yeah and
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then well everybody's seen John Gagan once he goes out
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on stage I.
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Don't even know who that is by the way do
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you not he's an ex-footballer he.
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Does the after dinner stuff does he okay but he's.
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Very much a you're describing there and then you'll be
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sitting with him at the dinner and then he goes
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up to do his bit and he's.
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Jim Delahunt's like that we walked with Jim Delahunt and
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obviously I grew up watching these guys Rob McLean whereas
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for example Rob's I think particularly charismatic on and off
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camera I think Jim Delahunt's a smashing guy really like
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him but he would be quite nervous and then he
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would go on and be like a different person because
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what you see is really fluent sort of stalwart of
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Scottish sports television and you would see him off and
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you'd be like, right, OK, just, you know, because obviously.
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It's weird, eh? Yeah, it's very, very different.
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Martin O'Neill's... I've seen Martin O'Neill before he goes on
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to the... I know, it's hard to believe, but the
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same in the dressing room. He's quiet, you know, and standoffish, like, shy.
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Maybe a few times he's come into the company, but
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then as soon as he steps up to, you know,
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go on the stage or deliver something in the dressing room,
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he comes alive.
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It's... It's very similar. John's the one that sticks out
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for me. And he's an ex-player. He played with Motherwell
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and Morton.
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And he talks his cell down, but he's just a
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totally different character, ain't he, when he goes up?
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I think, again, some people are different.
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I could really probably benefit with probably being a bit
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quieter even when I'm on stage. Because I feel that
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if I pause for breath or I'm quiet or I
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break the silence, I'm losing control. So I'll just keep
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fucking talking. It'll take me to some funny places.
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Yeah.
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But also there's a couple of times I'm crying, I
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don't want anybody to think this is bad, so if
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I'm quiet, like even stopping to think for a second,
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I'm like, no, so I just keep talking or I'll
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swear or something like that, just as a bridging word.
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Do you ever get to a bit of a brain freeze?
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Have you ever experienced that on stage?
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I have experienced it, because no matter how confident you are,
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because confidence is an act, so I'm dead confident, but
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that's like a real forced learned behaviour, so you just
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get into the rhythm of being like, right, okay, because
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you kind of know, I'll get through this, but what
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happens is, I think it's like a snowball rolling downhill. See,
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sometimes you just get caught in a bit of nervousness
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or you get in your own head and you see
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something and you think, well, fucking, they're having a terrible time.
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It's like you can see everything in a split second.
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And then maybe you've been flustered and then you can't
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even think of something. And then the panic takes over.
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And then a few times you've been like, holy shit,
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this is, I'm going to actually, I don't know what
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the fuck I'm going to say here. Do you know
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what I mean? You start doing my jokes about something else.
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Do you know what I mean?
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So, but it's, you have to almost, rationalise it and
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just go, just forget about it, do you know what
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I mean? Like the best way to describe it is,
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you always get, and again, it comes with experience, I
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always focus on the people who.
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Are not having fun or who I think are not
364
00:14:44.960 --> 00:14:46.559
having fun, do you know what I mean?
365
00:14:46.600 --> 00:14:49.179
Room of 100 people, 99 people laughing, I'm like, why
366
00:14:49.230 --> 00:14:50.769
don't you focus on that guy up the back there
367
00:14:50.789 --> 00:14:51.710
who's just sat like that?
368
00:14:52.870 --> 00:14:53.710
Just focus on.
369
00:14:53.629 --> 00:14:55.769
Him and then you've got the old commentary, he's having
370
00:14:55.809 --> 00:14:57.710
a bad time, your jokes are shite, you should quit,
371
00:14:57.750 --> 00:14:59.590
you should quit, this is terrible, oh he's having a
372
00:14:59.629 --> 00:15:01.870
terrible time, why are you doing this material, stop it.
373
00:15:02.529 --> 00:15:04.870
And then, Like, I remember that happened with this gig
374
00:15:04.889 --> 00:15:06.370
and I did a break half-time and they were like,
375
00:15:06.389 --> 00:15:07.350
how you getting on, you enjoying yourself?
376
00:15:07.429 --> 00:15:10.009
I went, she's fucking brilliant, son. I said, alright, she's
377
00:15:10.190 --> 00:15:11.049
fucking done the laughing.
378
00:15:11.370 --> 00:15:13.519
She said, I had a stroke, mate, I cannae move
379
00:15:13.539 --> 00:15:14.600
the right side of my face.
380
00:15:17.019 --> 00:15:18.440
And that was a big lesson for me.
381
00:15:18.480 --> 00:15:21.200
Because, again, the guy the other day, at the Fringe,
382
00:15:21.519 --> 00:15:24.389
sat right down the front, he looked like Pierluigi Collina, right?
383
00:15:24.429 --> 00:15:26.629
So, piercing eyes and he just sat the whole time.
384
00:15:27.850 --> 00:15:29.029
He didn't laugh once.
385
00:15:29.500 --> 00:15:31.769
And you had to go, he'll probably be enjoying it,
386
00:15:32.039 --> 00:15:34.830
he might not be, but also, he'll probably be enjoying it,
387
00:15:35.340 --> 00:15:37.419
I was packing up my camera, and all that, and
388
00:15:37.639 --> 00:15:40.340
somebody came outside, and went, that guy didn't laugh, he's
389
00:15:40.360 --> 00:15:43.019
waiting outside for a selfie, and he was like, brilliant,
390
00:15:43.059 --> 00:15:45.210
my son lives in Somers, and just found out that's
391
00:15:45.230 --> 00:15:48.350
where he grew up, absolutely brilliant mate, and you just go, amazing,
392
00:15:48.509 --> 00:15:50.549
so it's like, you've got to, you've got to be
393
00:15:50.570 --> 00:15:52.350
aware of it, but also switch your brain off to
394
00:15:52.409 --> 00:15:53.690
it as well, I think, do you know what I mean, so.
395
00:15:54.049 --> 00:15:56.009
Who was the, who did we have on, was it
396
00:15:56.190 --> 00:16:00.120
Connor Burns? Connor Burns. That said about, the Scandinavians.
397
00:15:59.509 --> 00:16:03.250
Or something they just aye they're different aye nobody laughs nobody.
398
00:16:02.990 --> 00:16:05.110
Laughs but they'll say that was a good show or
399
00:16:05.129 --> 00:16:05.909
they'll just.
400
00:16:05.649 --> 00:16:08.710
Be but then at the end rave reviews yeah.
401
00:16:08.470 --> 00:16:11.529
Brilliant I think you've got you've got kids similar ages
402
00:16:11.549 --> 00:16:15.320
haven't you I feel that the young team don't laugh
403
00:16:15.740 --> 00:16:18.059
the same way I feel that if they're 18, 19
404
00:16:18.059 --> 00:16:20.879
they're almost when I say too young for comedy they
405
00:16:20.919 --> 00:16:23.379
are not letting themselves go because to laugh is quite
406
00:16:23.419 --> 00:16:24.870
a vulnerable thing do you know what I mean because
407
00:16:24.889 --> 00:16:26.149
you need to be a bit you need to be
408
00:16:26.169 --> 00:16:29.320
a bit stupid you're letting go of your sensibilities and
409
00:16:29.340 --> 00:16:32.740
you're wetting yourself with laughter whereas we do a lot
410
00:16:32.759 --> 00:16:34.500
of late night shows at the Fringe and it's all
411
00:16:34.519 --> 00:16:36.759
the kids they're 18, 19, 20 and they're all just
412
00:16:36.779 --> 00:16:39.019
sat there and I think they're so worried about what
413
00:16:39.059 --> 00:16:41.110
other people are thinking of them because you see them
414
00:16:41.120 --> 00:16:43.269
now they're a bit moody too cool to laugh well
415
00:16:43.289 --> 00:16:45.269
they're kind of posturing a lot more I think they've
416
00:16:45.289 --> 00:16:48.710
got so many metrics to measure themselves against that we
417
00:16:48.730 --> 00:16:50.769
didn't have do you know what I mean they've got Instagram, Snapchat,
418
00:16:50.789 --> 00:16:54.840
WhatsApp so they are kind of see them all you
419
00:16:54.860 --> 00:16:58.179
want to go it's alright so I feel it's really
420
00:16:58.240 --> 00:17:01.250
hard to judge if they find you funny or not
421
00:17:01.259 --> 00:17:02.370
do you know what I mean and then they're like
422
00:17:02.379 --> 00:17:04.230
oh you really enjoyed your show you're like what a chance.
423
00:17:04.089 --> 00:17:07.970
Of cracking a smile I know I chuckle that's true
424
00:17:08.049 --> 00:17:10.029
what about hecklers I.
425
00:17:09.970 --> 00:17:13.269
Don't get many hecklers at all but again I think
426
00:17:13.329 --> 00:17:16.049
that's I'm like cos I'm.
427
00:17:15.910 --> 00:17:18.930
Quite big obviously I follow you on Instagram you get
428
00:17:19.009 --> 00:17:20.890
maybe a wee bit more there that's easier to have
429
00:17:20.930 --> 00:17:22.349
a pop on Instagram isn't it just.
430
00:17:22.230 --> 00:17:25.140
The odd I comment that's fine because again I have
431
00:17:25.160 --> 00:17:27.720
to remind myself I slag people on Instagram I don't
432
00:17:27.759 --> 00:17:31.730
like on Instagram Gary Neville you know what I mean
433
00:17:31.750 --> 00:17:33.789
no but if I'm criticising somebody else or my auntie's
434
00:17:33.829 --> 00:17:35.349
a rotten pundit somebody else has got the right to
435
00:17:35.369 --> 00:17:37.849
say that to me sometimes I forget that as well
436
00:17:37.869 --> 00:17:39.509
because you know maybe try and do them in but
437
00:17:40.230 --> 00:17:41.609
I don't get a lot of heckles but I think
438
00:17:41.630 --> 00:17:47.380
it's because I'm quite a big personality on stage tall
439
00:17:47.599 --> 00:17:50.680
I'm fucking quite assertive so I think a lot of
440
00:17:50.720 --> 00:17:52.859
people go I'm not going to fucking it's like you've
441
00:17:52.880 --> 00:17:53.740
set the tone as a teacher.
442
00:17:53.869 --> 00:17:55.220
I get into comedy, I go like Roy Keane, do
443
00:17:55.309 --> 00:17:56.950
you know what I mean? It's like a derby, like
444
00:17:56.990 --> 00:17:57.509
a derby.
445
00:17:58.490 --> 00:18:00.769
So I kind of feel that that maybe puts people
446
00:18:00.869 --> 00:18:03.450
off doing it. I had a boy today, he just
447
00:18:03.470 --> 00:18:06.930
kept shouting out there. A couple of times, he just
448
00:18:06.950 --> 00:18:08.250
wanted to be involved a wee bit, do you know
449
00:18:08.269 --> 00:18:10.549
what I mean? I've done a joke and he's interjected
450
00:18:10.569 --> 00:18:11.970
and then I've had to address it and then I
451
00:18:12.029 --> 00:18:13.349
finished the joke and he laughed and I went, can
452
00:18:13.369 --> 00:18:14.730
you imagine how much better that joke would have been
453
00:18:14.750 --> 00:18:17.349
if you hadn't fucking said anything to me? But most
454
00:18:17.430 --> 00:18:19.539
of the time, I don't get it because I think
455
00:18:19.559 --> 00:18:21.140
most of the time people are just drunk and they just,
456
00:18:21.680 --> 00:18:24.200
they think that you can't hear them chatting. So they're
457
00:18:24.220 --> 00:18:26.220
trying to explain the jokes and all that. But it's
458
00:18:26.240 --> 00:18:27.680
a bit like being a teacher. I think if you
459
00:18:28.119 --> 00:18:29.859
go on about it all the time, I think you're
460
00:18:29.880 --> 00:18:32.079
ruining the gig for everybody. And also, I think if
461
00:18:32.099 --> 00:18:34.619
you pull somebody up for it, they also feel like
462
00:18:34.660 --> 00:18:35.720
an idiot and then they're going to.
463
00:18:36.079 --> 00:18:38.480
Do that defensive thing. I was only saying this, you know,
464
00:18:38.500 --> 00:18:38.980
because when.
465
00:18:38.900 --> 00:18:41.000
Somebody's checking their phone and they get pulled up by
466
00:18:41.019 --> 00:18:43.200
a comedian, they're always texting their sick baby or something
467
00:18:43.220 --> 00:18:43.869
like that, isn't it?
468
00:18:43.910 --> 00:18:46.170
It's always like, my child's at my child's house. So
469
00:18:46.210 --> 00:18:47.109
I think you need to just.
470
00:18:47.009 --> 00:18:48.930
Kind of go, listen, I know you don't realise it,
471
00:18:49.369 --> 00:18:51.089
If you don't mind, then I just give them a
472
00:18:51.130 --> 00:18:53.319
wee round of applause and I just kind of move on.
473
00:18:53.339 --> 00:18:56.599
But nine times out of ten, if it's just like chit-chatting,
474
00:18:56.619 --> 00:18:58.039
I just take my word. I just take my word.
475
00:18:58.359 --> 00:19:00.339
A lot of your comedy around the Scottish football, I
476
00:19:00.339 --> 00:19:03.920
was watching one earlier, I was pissing myself laughing, one
477
00:19:03.960 --> 00:19:07.190
with McInnes with a Harps top on.
478
00:19:07.849 --> 00:19:08.769
He's talking to Shankland.
479
00:19:08.789 --> 00:19:09.650
Oh, with Lauren Shankhill.
480
00:19:10.170 --> 00:19:12.190
I just want everyone to know I've invented that term.
481
00:19:13.309 --> 00:19:15.109
London Derek McInnes and Lauren Shankhill.
482
00:19:15.130 --> 00:19:18.759
Rangers can be... It's just, we are saying things like people.
483
00:19:19.380 --> 00:19:22.619
kind of think, and then using comedy to, I mean,
484
00:19:23.140 --> 00:19:25.839
I was pissing myself laughing at that. Even you're doing it,
485
00:19:25.849 --> 00:19:28.089
you get sticked for doing it like that?
486
00:19:28.109 --> 00:19:32.250
Ah, you always get, it's like anything else, you always
487
00:19:32.289 --> 00:19:34.190
kind of focus on maybe the one bad comment you get,
488
00:19:34.230 --> 00:19:36.799
so you do, you get, I get Celtic fans going
489
00:19:36.819 --> 00:19:40.900
like that, he's shite, I've got three or four accounts
490
00:19:41.259 --> 00:19:46.480
that religiously comment he's shite on every video, to like
491
00:19:46.519 --> 00:19:49.549
a wee burner account, And somebody's like, do you know what?
492
00:19:50.079 --> 00:19:52.299
He does again, he does again. Do you feel as
493
00:19:52.339 --> 00:19:53.640
if it's a defeat if you block them?
494
00:19:55.480 --> 00:19:57.420
Maybe, but also, yeah, because I think then all that
495
00:19:57.440 --> 00:19:59.140
will do is just motivate them to go, ah, we've
496
00:19:59.180 --> 00:20:00.470
got them, so let's keep doing it.
497
00:20:00.960 --> 00:20:03.039
And also, I actually kind of feel that most of these.
498
00:20:02.960 --> 00:20:05.000
People that are doing it, they must be really, really
499
00:20:05.059 --> 00:20:08.240
lonely and I'm obviously giving them, I'm at the cigarette
500
00:20:08.259 --> 00:20:10.789
burn you know what I mean is it something that
501
00:20:10.829 --> 00:20:12.930
they can feel I don't know because one of the
502
00:20:12.970 --> 00:20:16.519
guys that heckles me online all the time I remember
503
00:20:16.559 --> 00:20:19.220
like once I'd done a video and he put a
504
00:20:19.220 --> 00:20:21.759
laughing face and something quite nice next to it and
505
00:20:21.779 --> 00:20:23.339
I think he's forgot that he's meant to be heckling
506
00:20:23.359 --> 00:20:25.079
do you know what I mean so you do you
507
00:20:25.099 --> 00:20:26.460
do get him so I get silly fans that slag
508
00:20:26.480 --> 00:20:28.670
me because they'll be thinking this is shite you're slagging
509
00:20:28.690 --> 00:20:31.970
silly I get Rangers fans who he's a bigot and
510
00:20:32.009 --> 00:20:35.029
all that and you get people always saying he's no
511
00:20:35.089 --> 00:20:38.160
funny and they're tagging and sometimes you take that oh,
512
00:20:38.220 --> 00:20:39.700
it's a bit shite and you realise, I know, but
513
00:20:39.720 --> 00:20:42.269
you also think other things are shite. So I kind
514
00:20:42.349 --> 00:20:44.470
of tend to, to say you don't get bothered by
515
00:20:44.509 --> 00:20:46.950
it would be a lie, but I would say 95%
516
00:20:46.950 --> 00:20:49.369
of the time you're like, I get all the benefit
517
00:20:49.410 --> 00:20:50.970
of it, so you're due to take a bit of
518
00:20:50.990 --> 00:20:51.490
stick as well.
519
00:20:51.710 --> 00:20:54.309
Did you feel, see when you were, so you obviously,
520
00:20:54.329 --> 00:20:56.250
was it COVID time did you say you started really
521
00:20:56.309 --> 00:20:57.049
pushing it?
522
00:20:57.230 --> 00:21:00.109
No, it was, no, the worst thing is I wish
523
00:21:00.150 --> 00:21:02.769
I'd started TikTok during lockdown because I would have had
524
00:21:02.829 --> 00:21:03.950
a million followers, I would think.
525
00:21:03.970 --> 00:21:06.579
That's what I was going to ask you because conscious of.
526
00:21:07.720 --> 00:21:10.400
all your content going onto it, is that an avenue
527
00:21:10.420 --> 00:21:11.880
that you felt you had to get into there to
528
00:21:12.099 --> 00:21:14.079
get yourself more out there?
529
00:21:14.099 --> 00:21:15.480
Do you know what it's a bit like? Is it
530
00:21:15.500 --> 00:21:17.150
just easy? It's a bit like what we were.
531
00:21:17.029 --> 00:21:20.710
Talking about beforehand, about, you know, people overanalyzing things, where
532
00:21:20.730 --> 00:21:22.589
they're going like that, about Kasper Hof slicking the ball
533
00:21:22.609 --> 00:21:23.910
around the side, and he must have worked on that
534
00:21:23.950 --> 00:21:25.910
through the week, and you're like, well, he worked on
535
00:21:25.950 --> 00:21:27.650
passing the ball out wide. No, because a lot of
536
00:21:27.670 --> 00:21:30.630
the time, something just happens, and you go, oh, that works.
537
00:21:30.650 --> 00:21:33.569
So I think during lockdown, I was putting the odd
538
00:21:33.589 --> 00:21:35.970
little thing out on Instagram, but at that point I
539
00:21:35.970 --> 00:21:37.950
was too scared about what my pals would think and
540
00:21:37.970 --> 00:21:40.299
I didn't even know what TikTok was and I was like, oh.
541
00:21:40.319 --> 00:21:42.960
So I didn't start that probably for about another year
542
00:21:42.980 --> 00:21:44.940
until we came out of lockdown. I did my first
543
00:21:45.119 --> 00:21:46.960
couple of gigs after lockdown. That was when I started
544
00:21:47.000 --> 00:21:49.740
putting wee sort of stand-up clips out. And I'm talking about,
545
00:21:49.759 --> 00:21:51.559
you know, like you'd have the phone and you'd be
546
00:21:52.000 --> 00:21:54.319
put up against a bottle of water, you know, and
547
00:21:54.339 --> 00:21:56.079
you'd be getting up and filming it and sort of
548
00:21:56.099 --> 00:21:58.680
like that. And so I bought like a little tripod
549
00:21:58.700 --> 00:22:01.140
for eight quid off Amazon. You know, that was, you know,
550
00:22:01.500 --> 00:22:03.920
I was more advanced than a lot of people. back
551
00:22:03.940 --> 00:22:06.700
then doing it and you're embarrassed doing it because you're
552
00:22:06.740 --> 00:22:09.880
doing gigs with people for example like Connor Burns at
553
00:22:09.920 --> 00:22:11.700
that stage who was not going up and filming his
554
00:22:11.779 --> 00:22:13.680
own gigs and he was obviously been doing it for
555
00:22:13.700 --> 00:22:16.769
years longer than you was really well regarded or you'd
556
00:22:16.789 --> 00:22:19.910
be you know Mark Nelson or Ray Bradshaw people that
557
00:22:19.930 --> 00:22:22.970
were pro comedians and you're like I'm just a wee
558
00:22:23.009 --> 00:22:24.910
guy I don't make up film any stuff but I
559
00:22:24.950 --> 00:22:28.109
was very sort of resolute I just kind of I
560
00:22:28.150 --> 00:22:30.609
kind of had some feeling no I think this is
561
00:22:30.650 --> 00:22:33.170
what you do try and build mmhmm a following or
562
00:22:33.210 --> 00:22:35.640
a brand I don't really I didn't think I consciously
563
00:22:35.660 --> 00:22:37.079
sat down and went right this is what to do
564
00:22:37.099 --> 00:22:39.420
it's just it kind of felt like the right thing
565
00:22:39.440 --> 00:22:41.980
to do and then you start getting I think people
566
00:22:42.000 --> 00:22:43.900
oh this is great big man like you know I
567
00:22:43.940 --> 00:22:45.599
can't wait to come and see you and I just
568
00:22:45.619 --> 00:22:47.559
kind of then sort of made it my thing and
569
00:22:47.579 --> 00:22:49.299
then all of a sudden I think when I started
570
00:22:49.339 --> 00:22:50.940
the TikTok account that was the big thing because you
571
00:22:50.960 --> 00:22:52.880
were getting big growth on TikTok and that's when I
572
00:22:52.880 --> 00:22:56.779
realised oh people people are kind of consuming this sort
573
00:22:56.839 --> 00:22:59.779
of stuff and then it for me all of a
574
00:22:59.799 --> 00:23:02.779
sudden I started really thinking about the jokes for the clips,
575
00:23:02.799 --> 00:23:04.700
you get a lot of comedians purists, like, no, no,
576
00:23:04.740 --> 00:23:07.500
think about the jokes, think about them both, so I
577
00:23:07.539 --> 00:23:09.099
don't mind putting stuff on, I just think, well, I'll
578
00:23:09.119 --> 00:23:13.079
just write more stuff, so, probably my most famous bit,
579
00:23:13.440 --> 00:23:16.339
a stand-up, I think it's been the, the Roddy the
580
00:23:16.359 --> 00:23:19.269
Prodigy story, you know, the stand-up bit, it's a joke
581
00:23:19.289 --> 00:23:21.210
I've done, it's about certain means in Brazil, it's all
582
00:23:21.230 --> 00:23:24.569
based on a true story, it's 95% true, like most,
583
00:23:24.650 --> 00:23:28.250
you know, comic stories, but that all came, from me
584
00:23:28.289 --> 00:23:32.890
hearing Tam Cowan's, Juventus story, you know the donkey? The
585
00:23:32.910 --> 00:23:34.990
donkey has a guy over for dinner and he's like, ah,
586
00:23:35.009 --> 00:23:36.349
it's a picture of a zebra up on the wall
587
00:23:36.390 --> 00:23:37.630
and he says, what's that? That's when I used to
588
00:23:37.650 --> 00:23:40.769
play for Juventus. And I just thought, I'd like to
589
00:23:40.809 --> 00:23:43.150
come up with something like that. And then.
590
00:23:43.759 --> 00:23:45.700
So what is yours again? Is it in the favelas
591
00:23:45.740 --> 00:23:47.200
in Brazil or something? Aye, that's it.
592
00:23:47.220 --> 00:23:49.900
It's basically, I'm out in Brazil, it's a true story,
593
00:23:49.920 --> 00:23:53.359
but when I'm out in Brazil, a guy, Stephen, you'll
594
00:23:53.380 --> 00:23:54.859
probably know him for a lot of the dinners, I
595
00:23:54.880 --> 00:24:00.220
think he organises, he's on he's an accountant, he's based
596
00:24:00.279 --> 00:24:04.660
out opposite Albion Wolver Stadium and he messaged me when
597
00:24:04.680 --> 00:24:06.099
I was out in Brazil, he's like listen I know
598
00:24:06.119 --> 00:24:07.839
a boy that's got a bar in Rio, go and
599
00:24:07.880 --> 00:24:09.119
see him, we'll get you a drink and all that,
600
00:24:09.160 --> 00:24:09.759
he's a Celtic fan.
601
00:24:10.519 --> 00:24:11.119
I'm like what?
602
00:24:11.319 --> 00:24:13.759
And sends us to this address and he's like you
603
00:24:13.779 --> 00:24:15.460
go to the corner of the street of death in
604
00:24:15.579 --> 00:24:19.299
Ipanema and I'm out there with a boy in Old Scotia, Glasgow,
605
00:24:19.319 --> 00:24:22.640
his missus was Brazilian, she's from Rio and so we
606
00:24:22.660 --> 00:24:25.910
go to this bar and we've asked this guy called Humberto.
607
00:24:25.390 --> 00:24:28.150
And I'm like, Humberto, who's Humberto? I didn't say any problem,
608
00:24:28.170 --> 00:24:28.910
I asked for the king.
609
00:24:29.589 --> 00:24:32.250
And there's this guy, most Brazilian guy you can imagine
610
00:24:32.269 --> 00:24:34.390
in your life, with a full Celtic strip on.
611
00:24:34.549 --> 00:24:37.430
He wears a Celtic strip every day. And he sees
612
00:24:37.509 --> 00:24:40.569
us and he's like, oh, Bishop's Briggs. And I'm like, ah.
613
00:24:40.609 --> 00:24:43.970
Bishop's Briggs. So at that point, he'd only been to
614
00:24:44.009 --> 00:24:45.609
Celtic Park twice and he stays in Bishop Briggs.
615
00:24:45.630 --> 00:24:48.119
He was there, he'd been here all week. I missed
616
00:24:48.130 --> 00:24:49.950
him on Saturday because I was doing a gig at Gracie's,
617
00:24:49.970 --> 00:24:50.420
I couldn't.
618
00:24:50.259 --> 00:24:53.339
Get round to Boteco. but he'd come over, but I
619
00:24:53.380 --> 00:24:54.279
was just like, Stephen.
620
00:24:55.349 --> 00:24:57.589
Not only how did you meet this guy, the guy's obviously,
621
00:24:57.609 --> 00:25:00.730
for some reason, a Celtic fan, made the pilgrimage from
622
00:25:01.109 --> 00:25:04.150
Rio to Celtic Park, and has ended up in with
623
00:25:04.170 --> 00:25:06.829
a group of guys, Philip Bishop Briggs, speaks no English,
624
00:25:06.849 --> 00:25:08.390
and they're like, come on, son, you'll be all right,
625
00:25:08.410 --> 00:25:12.069
and they've just obviously took him under their wing, and basically,
626
00:25:12.130 --> 00:25:14.130
I kind of build up a story, he takes us
627
00:25:14.190 --> 00:25:16.630
on a favela tour the following day, which is all true,
628
00:25:17.470 --> 00:25:19.309
and we get to the favela tour, and I just,
629
00:25:19.900 --> 00:25:22.349
In my head, I just like, that would be quite,
630
00:25:22.380 --> 00:25:24.950
I don't know how it came about, but I just
631
00:25:25.009 --> 00:25:28.250
think the Brazilian names, and just Rodrigo, and I just went, Rodrigo, Roddy,
632
00:25:28.410 --> 00:25:30.289
Roddy the Prody, and then that's when I built up
633
00:25:30.849 --> 00:25:34.349
the story about how his brother-in-law, he's called, you know,
634
00:25:34.450 --> 00:25:36.660
he's a ranger's man, he's called Roddy the Prody, and
635
00:25:36.700 --> 00:25:41.279
it was probably the first big bit of viral stand-up
636
00:25:41.339 --> 00:25:45.160
comedy that I'd done, and that kind of, people came
637
00:25:45.180 --> 00:25:46.599
to see me doing a work in progress, my first
638
00:25:46.619 --> 00:25:49.460
work in progress was at Tennant's, four year ago I
639
00:25:49.480 --> 00:25:51.380
had ten people come but it was because they'd seen
640
00:25:51.400 --> 00:25:52.609
that joke or something like that you know what I
641
00:25:52.630 --> 00:25:54.990
mean so it kind of encouraged you to well that
642
00:25:55.029 --> 00:25:56.970
was when I'd realized I think that had been shared
643
00:25:57.029 --> 00:25:59.230
a thousand times my uncle who's a big blue nose
644
00:25:59.369 --> 00:26:02.349
sent me a video he was on a flight from
645
00:26:02.849 --> 00:26:05.309
Luton to Alicante and he's got a video filming you
646
00:26:05.329 --> 00:26:07.789
know the seat in front of you somebody's watching it
647
00:26:07.809 --> 00:26:10.430
do you know what I mean so when that kind
648
00:26:10.470 --> 00:26:13.539
of happened you're going alright this is the kind of
649
00:26:13.660 --> 00:26:15.940
this is the power of doing this whereas the more
650
00:26:15.960 --> 00:26:18.970
traditional people way I suppose is getting in, doing the
651
00:26:18.990 --> 00:26:21.630
comedy clubs, getting people to go to the comedy clubs
652
00:26:21.650 --> 00:26:24.130
to come and see you, bit like a band basically,
653
00:26:24.150 --> 00:26:24.869
doing the circuit.
654
00:26:24.990 --> 00:26:26.309
Or a band going viral.
655
00:26:26.529 --> 00:26:28.549
But you see that now, just to touch on the
656
00:26:28.589 --> 00:26:30.549
bands as well, you see that nowadays with bands, and
657
00:26:31.289 --> 00:26:34.309
speaking to a couple of bands personally as well, and
658
00:26:34.329 --> 00:26:36.490
they don't really like doing that sort of stuff, but
659
00:26:36.670 --> 00:26:38.109
they feel as if they maybe have to do it
660
00:26:38.150 --> 00:26:40.369
now just to get themselves out there, it's probably similar.
661
00:26:40.650 --> 00:26:42.490
I think it is, so one of the boys, again,
662
00:26:42.619 --> 00:26:45.000
everything all comes back to playing football, so I play
663
00:26:45.039 --> 00:26:48.420
football on a Friday in London, I mean, red flags
664
00:26:48.440 --> 00:26:50.839
should have gone up there where I play football in
665
00:26:50.940 --> 00:26:53.109
London and it's 11 o'clock to 1 o'clock on a
666
00:26:53.119 --> 00:26:54.940
Friday and I should have thought to myself, who's playing
667
00:26:54.960 --> 00:26:56.710
football at 11 o'clock.
668
00:26:56.490 --> 00:26:57.490
On a Friday morning, right?
669
00:26:58.289 --> 00:27:00.390
And I did it in this group chat and when
670
00:27:00.430 --> 00:27:02.009
I play football in Glasgow, it'll be like the Kings
671
00:27:02.049 --> 00:27:04.730
Park Rangers amateur team of the Shawlins or the Young
672
00:27:04.750 --> 00:27:07.630
Boys of Partick over 40s. And I'm not saying I'm famous,
673
00:27:07.670 --> 00:27:09.049
but when I'm in these group chats, I'll be the
674
00:27:09.069 --> 00:27:10.990
most famous person in this group chat, so I'm I'm
675
00:27:11.009 --> 00:27:12.150
dropping crumbs from my table.
676
00:27:12.549 --> 00:27:14.049
Just why do you have some of these TikToks on me?
677
00:27:14.170 --> 00:27:16.890
I'm grateful that Daddy's giving me this performance behind the scenes.
678
00:27:16.910 --> 00:27:17.630
Just love it, love it.
679
00:27:18.339 --> 00:27:20.779
And then I get added into this group chat and
680
00:27:21.579 --> 00:27:23.559
I'm just going to fucking do the exact same thing here.
681
00:27:23.599 --> 00:27:26.180
I don't know anyone, but my method of making friends
682
00:27:26.240 --> 00:27:27.180
is a bit like Roy.
683
00:27:27.019 --> 00:27:27.900
Keane in a derby.
684
00:27:27.920 --> 00:27:30.839
Just fucking go in there bold and brash early and
685
00:27:30.859 --> 00:27:32.519
you can repair the damage over the next year, but
686
00:27:32.539 --> 00:27:33.480
they'll know who you are at least.
687
00:27:33.500 --> 00:27:35.700
So I get into this group chat and I'm fucking
688
00:27:35.720 --> 00:27:36.710
here taking crumbs from the table.
689
00:27:36.730 --> 00:27:39.210
I'm throwing in TikToks on myself and fucking Derek McKinnon's
690
00:27:39.230 --> 00:27:42.119
impersonation and all that. And then I realised later, this
691
00:27:42.160 --> 00:27:45.319
is an actor's group chat that's been running for 10 years.
692
00:27:45.339 --> 00:27:47.369
They've been playing football and in that group chat it's
693
00:27:47.410 --> 00:27:50.789
been like Jack O'Connell, Barry Keegan, Jordan Stephens with the
694
00:27:50.809 --> 00:27:54.529
Rizzle Kicks, Colin Bikini from Top Boy, Shopa Jerusalem.
695
00:27:54.250 --> 00:27:54.930
From Gangs of London.
696
00:27:54.970 --> 00:27:56.630
And I'm like, oh, there's all the swell winners in
697
00:27:56.690 --> 00:27:58.730
there and they don't know who Derek McInnes is.
698
00:27:58.750 --> 00:28:02.049
Do you know what I mean? Are you still playing
699
00:28:02.069 --> 00:28:03.910
with these guys? Still playing with these guys. A lot
700
00:28:03.990 --> 00:28:04.880
of great boys in there.
701
00:28:05.380 --> 00:28:08.079
And then that team has populated a Sunday team, so
702
00:28:08.099 --> 00:28:10.650
a Sunday league team. And then, One of the boys,
703
00:28:10.670 --> 00:28:12.710
I went and played this against Sunday League team a
704
00:28:12.730 --> 00:28:15.329
couple of times and they've added me into the group chat.
705
00:28:15.769 --> 00:28:17.710
The guy who's kind of taken the running of the team,
706
00:28:17.839 --> 00:28:20.319
just plays the team, seen him come up on Instagram,
707
00:28:20.400 --> 00:28:24.019
Joe Manager has followed you. I went, oh, that guy,
708
00:28:24.039 --> 00:28:26.160
Joe Manager, it must be his big hang, managing the
709
00:28:26.700 --> 00:28:31.180
amateur team. Look at his profile, fucking 120,000 followers on Instagram.
710
00:28:31.460 --> 00:28:35.400
Managers like Busted, The Vamps, Henry Moody, all these young.
711
00:28:35.680 --> 00:28:37.359
Talented acts. You thought he was just the manager of
712
00:28:37.380 --> 00:28:40.369
the team? The manager of the team. And that's kind
713
00:28:40.410 --> 00:28:43.910
of his roster of acts. I think it's that thing.
714
00:28:43.950 --> 00:28:47.269
They're so, some of the nicest people I've ever met,
715
00:28:47.410 --> 00:28:51.759
but they're all huge on, like, Instagram. So people that, like,
716
00:28:51.819 --> 00:28:57.660
who's Henry Moody and who's Rhys Bibby? So they're just
717
00:28:58.160 --> 00:29:00.700
super talented. I call them kids, but, like, they're super talented.
718
00:29:00.720 --> 00:29:02.400
They're all in their early 20s, but they've all got
719
00:29:02.769 --> 00:29:05.990
a million followers each on Instagram and TikTok, whereas I think,
720
00:29:06.049 --> 00:29:08.579
you know, like, he used to tell me when they
721
00:29:08.599 --> 00:29:11.559
go to Brazil we're busted or whatever he went we'll
722
00:29:11.579 --> 00:29:15.039
play a thousand seater because that's the legacy of them
723
00:29:15.079 --> 00:29:18.420
being on TV whereas he went if we take Henry
724
00:29:18.460 --> 00:29:20.660
Moody to Brazil he said we could play twice the
725
00:29:20.680 --> 00:29:23.450
venue or something like that because they've all done their
726
00:29:23.490 --> 00:29:25.849
thing online it's just I know I think the older
727
00:29:25.950 --> 00:29:27.410
ones don't want to do it as much because they're
728
00:29:27.430 --> 00:29:30.569
like I'm here to play music I'm not here to
729
00:29:30.609 --> 00:29:33.450
be social media but I think the younger generation now
730
00:29:33.470 --> 00:29:36.299
of bands are coming up through that's how they're getting
731
00:29:36.319 --> 00:29:38.980
themselves out there I don't know how fair it is
732
00:29:39.099 --> 00:29:42.000
because it's you know there's a bit of injustice said
733
00:29:42.019 --> 00:29:43.519
to that too but I think that's just the world
734
00:29:43.539 --> 00:29:44.420
that we're in now isn't it yeah.
735
00:29:44.740 --> 00:29:48.589
Aye definitely definitely you went to London as well was
736
00:29:48.609 --> 00:29:52.829
that a conscious decision with your the comedy and everything
737
00:29:52.849 --> 00:29:55.750
aye well no really because so when I first moved
738
00:29:55.769 --> 00:29:58.259
to London I was 27 and I just I kind
739
00:29:58.299 --> 00:29:59.160
of felt like I was just.
740
00:29:59.059 --> 00:30:02.380
Getting swallowed whole by Glasgow. I'd been here my whole life.
741
00:30:02.460 --> 00:30:05.109
I'd never gone away for university.
742
00:30:04.789 --> 00:30:05.509
Or anything like that.
743
00:30:05.589 --> 00:30:08.589
Just, you know, the dynamics of my family, like we
744
00:30:08.630 --> 00:30:11.190
were reliant on me and my sister, you know, with
745
00:30:11.309 --> 00:30:13.190
my brother's care and just our kind of set up.
746
00:30:13.210 --> 00:30:15.490
So it was never something I thought about. I was
747
00:30:15.529 --> 00:30:17.049
leaving and it just got to that stage. I was like,
748
00:30:17.069 --> 00:30:19.190
I kind of just really need to get out of here.
749
00:30:19.710 --> 00:30:21.180
So when I was in London, I did the shopping
750
00:30:21.200 --> 00:30:22.960
channels and all that and the old fated spell in
751
00:30:22.980 --> 00:30:23.500
the Philippines.
752
00:30:23.700 --> 00:30:25.299
And when I came back, I couldn't get a job.
753
00:30:26.369 --> 00:30:28.210
And I always wanted to come back to London, because
754
00:30:28.230 --> 00:30:30.269
I didn't really want to leave London, I just couldn't
755
00:30:30.289 --> 00:30:32.809
afford to live there without a job, so my partner,
756
00:30:32.829 --> 00:30:37.089
she's from the South England, and just came up in conversation,
757
00:30:37.150 --> 00:30:38.960
she's never lived in London, her sister lives there, a
758
00:30:38.980 --> 00:30:40.559
couple of her best pals live there, and I'd always
759
00:30:40.599 --> 00:30:43.259
wanted to go back, just kind of came up in conversation,
760
00:30:43.279 --> 00:30:45.359
you know, we were sort of fortunate, we were in
761
00:30:45.400 --> 00:30:47.420
the position that we could go down and sort of
762
00:30:47.440 --> 00:30:49.920
try out and rent a place, and I actually don't
763
00:30:49.960 --> 00:30:52.450
really do comedy down there, I do Top Secret down there,
764
00:30:52.470 --> 00:30:54.009
which is a brilliant club, but I only do that
765
00:30:54.029 --> 00:30:56.130
maybe a couple of times a month, but can you
766
00:30:56.150 --> 00:30:58.450
make money, really? I don't feel on the London circuit,
767
00:30:58.519 --> 00:31:00.220
or on a lot of comedy circuits, because the comedy
768
00:31:00.259 --> 00:31:01.220
clubs pay so little.
769
00:31:01.240 --> 00:31:03.839
You know what I mean? It's quite an outdated model.
770
00:31:03.880 --> 00:31:06.279
They're paying the same fees for headliners on a Saturday
771
00:31:06.299 --> 00:31:08.400
night that they were paying, I think the standard paying
772
00:31:08.420 --> 00:31:11.599
the same fee that they were paying 15 years ago. So,
773
00:31:11.880 --> 00:31:13.720
you're not making money that way, and I came into
774
00:31:13.740 --> 00:31:15.680
this a lot later, so at 40 years old, I
775
00:31:15.720 --> 00:31:19.019
can't really afford to be around comedy clubs all over
776
00:31:19.079 --> 00:31:21.849
London and doing three and four gigs a night to
777
00:31:21.869 --> 00:31:25.079
come away with two, three hundred quid, it's no worthwhile,
778
00:31:25.099 --> 00:31:28.319
whereas if you go up to Blackfriars, you know, and
779
00:31:28.400 --> 00:31:32.119
Chris at Blackfriars, a brilliant guy, he's calling me, you
780
00:31:32.180 --> 00:31:34.900
do the gig in there, his deal is the artist gets.
781
00:31:34.680 --> 00:31:38.220
100% of the door money, and they'll give you a tech,
782
00:31:38.779 --> 00:31:42.539
and a show runner, and they'll look after you, and
783
00:31:42.640 --> 00:31:43.640
you can go up and do that, and you can
784
00:31:43.680 --> 00:31:46.150
come back down, if you do one show, you know,
785
00:31:46.170 --> 00:31:48.509
you can make 1500 quid or something like that, and
786
00:31:48.529 --> 00:31:50.630
you've been on stage for an hour and a half, and,
787
00:31:51.400 --> 00:31:53.559
you know, people come and see, so that's been the way,
788
00:31:53.579 --> 00:31:56.000
the kind of, the model, and I think there's, I
789
00:31:56.019 --> 00:31:57.319
think there's a lot of guys that are doing, like
790
00:31:57.339 --> 00:31:59.720
Stuart Mitchell's doing that, Gary Foles is doing that, Gary
791
00:31:59.740 --> 00:32:00.569
Meekle's doing.
792
00:32:00.369 --> 00:32:04.450
That, you know, Connor, I mean, he's going stratospheric, but
793
00:32:04.549 --> 00:32:07.190
I think that's becoming, there's a change now, same, I
794
00:32:07.210 --> 00:32:08.390
was in it, I was in it at Grace's on
795
00:32:08.410 --> 00:32:11.529
Saturday night, the boy joining there really looked after me,
796
00:32:11.569 --> 00:32:15.130
they were really keen for me to come down, it's not,
797
00:32:15.230 --> 00:32:17.279
it's not a comedy club, so, you know, everyone wants
798
00:32:17.299 --> 00:32:20.380
the perfect, You want low ceilings and the seats facing
799
00:32:20.420 --> 00:32:21.920
the same way and get the lights down.
800
00:32:21.799 --> 00:32:24.599
Low and you're doing it in that big room. It's incredible.
801
00:32:24.680 --> 00:32:27.720
But it was kind of like doing comedy in a
802
00:32:27.920 --> 00:32:30.240
beer tent almost. It was just that kind of atmosphere.
803
00:32:30.509 --> 00:32:33.130
But it was brilliant. It was really, really good. And
804
00:32:33.150 --> 00:32:35.349
they really looked after you. They paid me really well.
805
00:32:37.170 --> 00:32:39.210
As you would expect if I'd run the gig myself
806
00:32:39.250 --> 00:32:41.609
and done the door money. Whereas on a Saturday night,
807
00:32:41.930 --> 00:32:44.289
a comedy club, you might get, I don't know, 250
808
00:32:44.289 --> 00:32:46.109
quid if you're the headliner. If you're doing the middle spot,
809
00:32:46.150 --> 00:32:49.150
you'd maybe get 150 quid, you do that for the weekend,
810
00:32:49.170 --> 00:32:53.190
you're making 300 a pound, you're not paying the mortgage.
811
00:32:53.269 --> 00:32:55.009
It is, when you describe it like that, it's quite
812
00:32:55.029 --> 00:33:00.049
a tough profession to be in. Going back to your
813
00:33:00.089 --> 00:33:02.269
social media then, do you feel it's really important to
814
00:33:02.289 --> 00:33:04.869
get all your content out there? And the good thing is,
815
00:33:05.430 --> 00:33:07.809
you've said before, you lean on the football. So you've
816
00:33:07.829 --> 00:33:09.990
got plenty of stuff to get into.
817
00:33:10.039 --> 00:33:11.250
It's all relevant. I've seen stuff.
818
00:33:13.539 --> 00:33:15.740
That's happened the day before, or even on the same day,
819
00:33:15.769 --> 00:33:17.589
and you've got something out that night relevant to it?
820
00:33:17.630 --> 00:33:20.250
So that's something that I've just, I suppose, I don't
821
00:33:20.269 --> 00:33:22.170
know if it's like you boys in the off-season, you're like,
822
00:33:22.269 --> 00:33:23.730
I'm going to step it up next season, do you
823
00:33:23.750 --> 00:33:25.710
know what I mean? That's it, and we're pounding the
824
00:33:25.750 --> 00:33:29.019
pavements for the pre-season. I realised that, I suppose, the
825
00:33:29.039 --> 00:33:32.079
power of that with the World Cup, and just the
826
00:33:32.119 --> 00:33:35.220
little extra, the little bit of the extra theatre, so
827
00:33:35.240 --> 00:33:37.140
you know, like, people are like, you must have a bag,
828
00:33:37.180 --> 00:33:39.160
I've got a big kit bag full of strips, I've
829
00:33:39.180 --> 00:33:42.950
been buying stuff off Vinted, and, everything at the World
830
00:33:42.970 --> 00:33:45.450
Cup I keep no but I keep getting I kept
831
00:33:45.490 --> 00:33:47.200
trying to buy Ranger stuff off Vinted and it kept
832
00:33:47.220 --> 00:33:49.839
getting cancelled so I think what was happening they were
833
00:33:49.859 --> 00:33:51.480
like because I wasn't even bidding I was just paying
834
00:33:51.500 --> 00:33:53.640
the money that they wanted 20 quid bang right great
835
00:33:53.660 --> 00:33:55.019
and they've got like four days to send it to
836
00:33:55.039 --> 00:33:57.440
you and obviously once they put their details in I
837
00:33:57.500 --> 00:34:01.029
reckon they're going Ian Gardner London don't sell that to
838
00:34:01.049 --> 00:34:02.750
him so I had to buy it for like the
839
00:34:02.789 --> 00:34:05.890
club shop and stuff like that so I feel like
840
00:34:05.910 --> 00:34:08.349
you know about Casper they want the wig and they
841
00:34:08.369 --> 00:34:10.369
want a little bit you know just a little bit
842
00:34:10.429 --> 00:34:12.780
more but if you can My view is if you
843
00:34:12.800 --> 00:34:15.469
can get it out that night, it doesn't need to
844
00:34:15.510 --> 00:34:18.760
be that brilliant. Obviously, I want everything to be really good,
845
00:34:19.489 --> 00:34:21.019
but I think people want to be.
846
00:34:20.949 --> 00:34:22.889
Part of something. They want to share things. They want
847
00:34:22.909 --> 00:34:24.349
to be the first.
848
00:34:24.550 --> 00:34:28.590
They want something that, I suppose, represents how you're feeling
849
00:34:28.630 --> 00:34:30.690
about things or something you can share or be a
850
00:34:30.730 --> 00:34:33.789
part of. So getting it out that night now is
851
00:34:33.809 --> 00:34:36.289
really important. So, man, my sister's like that. You come
852
00:34:36.309 --> 00:34:37.730
into bed and I'm like that. I need to do
853
00:34:37.750 --> 00:34:41.960
a Derek McKinnis video. And then she's like... she's like
854
00:34:42.039 --> 00:34:43.780
brushing her teeth and then I'm just, I'm coming in
855
00:34:43.800 --> 00:34:45.679
to put, I'm coming in to put bronzer on and
856
00:34:45.719 --> 00:34:47.630
I've got the suit on and I'm wearing shorts and
857
00:34:47.670 --> 00:34:49.469
flip flops and she's like, what are you doing?
858
00:34:49.489 --> 00:34:50.829
Do you know what I mean?
859
00:34:50.929 --> 00:34:54.369
So, it's, but I love doing that stuff and I
860
00:34:54.389 --> 00:34:56.630
love talking about football during the stand up because I
861
00:34:56.670 --> 00:34:58.980
think that that's, I think that's a real gap in
862
00:34:59.000 --> 00:35:01.219
the market because it's like, well, most people want to
863
00:35:01.260 --> 00:35:04.420
talk about their team and it's funny, in stand up
864
00:35:04.559 --> 00:35:07.980
and like, I feel that, again, 60 people here today
865
00:35:08.440 --> 00:35:11.639
and doing our different bits and, politics and this and
866
00:35:11.679 --> 00:35:13.219
growing up and all this and then I was like, right,
867
00:35:13.239 --> 00:35:13.679
you want to hear.
868
00:35:13.619 --> 00:35:15.519
Some football stuff? Do you know what I mean? And
869
00:35:15.539 --> 00:35:15.960
that's it.
870
00:35:15.980 --> 00:35:19.559
And talking to a lovely couple from Lytham and we
871
00:35:19.579 --> 00:35:21.039
were chatting about it because I went, I said, I
872
00:35:21.059 --> 00:35:22.639
don't really know where Lytham is but does the golf
873
00:35:22.659 --> 00:35:23.179
get played there?
874
00:35:23.199 --> 00:35:25.099
Is it Lytham? He went, aye, that's right, you know.
875
00:35:25.840 --> 00:35:29.090
And then chatting to them outside and they were, I said, listen,
876
00:35:29.659 --> 00:35:30.769
why made you come and see me?
877
00:35:30.829 --> 00:35:32.010
Because they've travelled.
878
00:35:31.730 --> 00:35:34.389
Up for the fringe and they went, oh, I don't,
879
00:35:34.789 --> 00:35:36.849
come across a couple of your football reels and he
880
00:35:36.869 --> 00:35:37.769
just said, there's loads of.
881
00:35:37.739 --> 00:35:40.260
Scottish people on, there are loads of Rangers fans.
882
00:35:40.280 --> 00:35:43.820
But he said, so I liked that one you did
883
00:35:43.900 --> 00:35:45.639
and all that and they know a boy, who used
884
00:35:45.659 --> 00:35:46.199
to be known.
885
00:35:46.099 --> 00:35:48.800
As the King, is it the King, who's it, Derek
886
00:35:48.820 --> 00:35:50.119
McPartland or something like that? A player?
887
00:35:50.679 --> 00:35:50.780
Aye.
888
00:35:50.840 --> 00:35:53.659
Aye, by the way, it is McPartland. McPartland, that's their mate.
889
00:35:53.679 --> 00:35:55.619
Brian O'Neill stays in that neck of the woods as
890
00:35:55.639 --> 00:35:56.500
well and I think he knows him.
891
00:35:56.820 --> 00:35:59.409
Aye, okay, so that's, they went, well, we're friends with him,
892
00:35:59.630 --> 00:36:01.039
actually used to play with him. So they, So they
893
00:36:01.059 --> 00:36:01.800
kind of know a bit.
894
00:36:01.960 --> 00:36:05.059
So your rules are getting you travelling that. That's it.
895
00:36:05.199 --> 00:36:08.449
It was actually, somebody kind of said, because I remember
896
00:36:08.469 --> 00:36:11.710
at one point thinking, because football stuff has kind of
897
00:36:12.070 --> 00:36:14.929
looked down their nose a wee bit by comedy clubs
898
00:36:15.050 --> 00:36:18.909
and I think comedy's becoming quite middle class now. Because
899
00:36:19.010 --> 00:36:21.670
if you're saying, you're more than going to be a comedian,
900
00:36:21.690 --> 00:36:24.530
but what? I mean, I know Kevin Bridges, very well
901
00:36:24.550 --> 00:36:28.119
in class, he is the GOAT and he's brilliant.
902
00:36:28.719 --> 00:36:31.139
But, he says his dad went like I'll take you
903
00:36:31.159 --> 00:36:31.579
to the clubs you.
904
00:36:31.539 --> 00:36:32.800
Know he was too young to get in he went
905
00:36:32.840 --> 00:36:34.960
I'll take you which is brilliant but if I had
906
00:36:34.980 --> 00:36:36.340
said to my dad at 16 I'm going to do
907
00:36:36.360 --> 00:36:38.019
comedy I'd be fucking very good do you know what
908
00:36:38.119 --> 00:36:40.980
I mean so I think increasingly it's becoming a middle
909
00:36:41.000 --> 00:36:45.210
class sport because you know you don't need to pay
910
00:36:45.230 --> 00:36:47.809
the bills or you know pay the rent.
911
00:36:47.590 --> 00:36:51.849
Plus it's so different from even 10 years ago with
912
00:36:52.349 --> 00:36:52.750
what you.
913
00:36:52.670 --> 00:36:56.489
Can and can't say it's out of offending anybody.
914
00:36:56.650 --> 00:36:58.670
I well I think more than anything it's just the
915
00:36:59.500 --> 00:37:01.300
it's kind of like there's a down payment you need
916
00:37:01.340 --> 00:37:03.389
to make for doing comedy. You need to be able
917
00:37:03.409 --> 00:37:05.630
to do it for five or six years to become
918
00:37:05.690 --> 00:37:08.250
really good at it. And if you can't pay for
919
00:37:08.269 --> 00:37:09.570
it in that time, there's a lot of people who
920
00:37:09.590 --> 00:37:11.710
just never get a chance to get on stage. So
921
00:37:11.730 --> 00:37:13.849
the football stuff I think has been really important for
922
00:37:13.889 --> 00:37:16.309
me because people are coming to see you off of that.
923
00:37:17.210 --> 00:37:19.730
The sketches, the football sketches, people are coming to see
924
00:37:19.750 --> 00:37:22.710
you off that. And I've kind of realised, well, actually,
925
00:37:22.730 --> 00:37:24.949
I should just really sort of lean into that even more.
926
00:37:24.969 --> 00:37:28.159
So I brought didn't he bring the suit and all
927
00:37:28.179 --> 00:37:29.039
that up for the derring?
928
00:37:29.059 --> 00:37:31.030
So I'm going like, I hope he doesn't get through
929
00:37:31.070 --> 00:37:31.829
so I don't need to do a sketch.
930
00:37:31.849 --> 00:37:34.010
Have you got the brown brogues or not?
931
00:37:34.070 --> 00:37:35.329
I've got all that from when I worked at C.R.
932
00:37:35.329 --> 00:37:37.070
Smith, I've got the brogues, I've got the brogues, I've
933
00:37:37.090 --> 00:37:39.119
got everything, but I've got everything.
934
00:37:39.139 --> 00:37:40.780
There's a wee bit of grey in the beard and
935
00:37:40.840 --> 00:37:41.079
all though.
936
00:37:41.219 --> 00:37:42.019
Well, do you know what I think?
937
00:37:42.199 --> 00:37:44.239
I've got, grey stuff I put on but you know
938
00:37:44.260 --> 00:37:46.179
when you use the kind of TikTok green screen app
939
00:37:46.409 --> 00:37:48.150
it was washing my face off it was making my
940
00:37:48.170 --> 00:37:49.650
face go chalk white and I was like oh god
941
00:37:49.670 --> 00:37:51.789
this doesn't work you need to tan up and off
942
00:37:52.010 --> 00:37:54.070
I bought bronzer I don't know if I brought it
943
00:37:54.090 --> 00:37:56.309
with me so my missy's like why are you buying
944
00:37:56.329 --> 00:37:57.469
bronzer and I'm like I need to put it on
945
00:37:57.489 --> 00:37:59.829
for Derek McKinnon so I brought up like the Rangers
946
00:37:59.849 --> 00:38:02.110
training top and I brought up the Celtic training top
947
00:38:02.190 --> 00:38:03.989
and the big the Casper whole wig because I'm like
948
00:38:04.010 --> 00:38:06.139
maybe I'll do something and I can do a sketch
949
00:38:06.159 --> 00:38:09.260
but even all those sorts of things are going fucking
950
00:38:09.300 --> 00:38:12.940
like when I went to Thailand at the January there,
951
00:38:13.199 --> 00:38:15.900
that was when Wilfred Doncey got the boot and she's like,
952
00:38:15.920 --> 00:38:17.539
we're going out for dinner and I'm like, wait, wait,
953
00:38:17.559 --> 00:38:20.139
and I've got the Celtic green on top and trying
954
00:38:20.159 --> 00:38:21.309
to do a Martin O'Neill skit.
955
00:38:21.139 --> 00:38:22.449
And all that, do you know what I mean?
956
00:38:22.570 --> 00:38:24.530
She's like, please man, I'm holding a wee light up
957
00:38:24.570 --> 00:38:27.349
for myself and all that, filming it with one arm.
958
00:38:27.929 --> 00:38:29.420
You couldn't have done Wilfred though, could you?
959
00:38:30.789 --> 00:38:32.690
I don't get allowed to black up these days, fucking,
960
00:38:32.829 --> 00:38:37.489
woke nonsense, woke nonsense that, innit? But even, again, you've
961
00:38:37.510 --> 00:38:39.570
got to think about your choices, even, you know, like,
962
00:38:39.630 --> 00:38:43.409
for example, somebody was like, so either you're doing the
963
00:38:43.449 --> 00:38:45.519
French accent, and I was like, well, I don't think,
964
00:38:45.559 --> 00:38:47.280
I think you've got to just be conscious.
965
00:38:47.300 --> 00:38:49.019
Somebody dug you up for that?
966
00:38:49.039 --> 00:38:51.440
You always get people who think, and I think it's
967
00:38:51.480 --> 00:38:54.309
important to recognise and start to look at it.
968
00:38:54.519 --> 00:38:56.250
I don't have the rule book that says I'm right.
969
00:38:56.369 --> 00:38:57.929
I can only go with what I think is right
970
00:38:58.010 --> 00:38:59.150
and what my intentions were.
971
00:38:59.670 --> 00:39:02.130
So in terms of, like, can I say anything anymore?
972
00:39:02.530 --> 00:39:04.989
I don't know. I think I'm not really worried about
973
00:39:05.010 --> 00:39:05.730
cancel culture.
974
00:39:05.820 --> 00:39:08.670
I think the been proven that you can't get cancelled
975
00:39:08.730 --> 00:39:10.559
if you went to boarding school like you know Jeremy
976
00:39:10.579 --> 00:39:13.199
Clarkson's not been cancelled if I punch somebody at my
977
00:39:13.239 --> 00:39:15.300
work I get blacklisted and that's exactly what happened actually
978
00:39:15.320 --> 00:39:19.199
I got blacklisted as a tanner I went outside for
979
00:39:19.300 --> 00:39:22.570
a fight with my producer at a Christmas night out
980
00:39:22.619 --> 00:39:26.530
that's why Keegs is doing the exec producer of Scottish
981
00:39:26.550 --> 00:39:28.670
football and Sky Sports that's why I'm fucking doing gigs
982
00:39:28.710 --> 00:39:31.960
in a basement there's a reason that I never got
983
00:39:31.980 --> 00:39:35.079
taken to ESPN do you know what I mean whereas
984
00:39:35.099 --> 00:39:37.659
Jeremy Clarkson can do whatever he wants and still get
985
00:39:37.679 --> 00:39:40.840
shows I think when people get cancelled I feel it's
986
00:39:40.909 --> 00:39:45.639
because they've maybe built their reputation on a bit of
987
00:39:45.659 --> 00:39:48.500
your falsehood and then once they say something about people
988
00:39:48.539 --> 00:39:50.179
are waiting for you there's an opportunity to take them
989
00:39:50.199 --> 00:39:51.619
down I think people are waiting for them because they
990
00:39:51.639 --> 00:39:55.380
go you're at it he's no nice guy or they're
991
00:39:55.400 --> 00:39:56.869
full of shit and then I think what they do
992
00:39:56.909 --> 00:39:58.409
is they then go for them they're going through and
993
00:39:58.510 --> 00:40:01.110
then they find the tweets or they find the emails
994
00:40:01.170 --> 00:40:02.869
or somebody else comes forward and I kind of feel
995
00:40:02.889 --> 00:40:04.989
like well if somebody wants to.
996
00:40:04.929 --> 00:40:06.989
Come and do that fair enough but I kind of
997
00:40:07.010 --> 00:40:08.960
feel that the way I try and go about my
998
00:40:09.000 --> 00:40:10.460
business and live my life I think.
999
00:40:10.340 --> 00:40:12.559
There'll be a bigger group of people who'll go he's
1000
00:40:12.619 --> 00:40:15.159
alright by the way and like I get loads of
1001
00:40:15.179 --> 00:40:17.239
really nice messages for Rangers supporters and stuff.
1002
00:40:17.079 --> 00:40:19.519
Like that, really, like, big man, I'm a blue nose
1003
00:40:19.539 --> 00:40:20.110
and all that, and.
1004
00:40:20.070 --> 00:40:21.969
I think you're fucking great, or I think your stuff's funny,
1005
00:40:22.010 --> 00:40:24.429
and I was offended, but I think it's important to
1006
00:40:24.469 --> 00:40:27.280
kind of always just try and be cognizant of it,
1007
00:40:27.289 --> 00:40:29.670
and just go, maybe that was wrong, it wasn't my intention,
1008
00:40:29.690 --> 00:40:30.349
do you know what I mean?
1009
00:40:31.349 --> 00:40:34.309
So, your works heavily football theme, we'll finish in a
1010
00:40:34.329 --> 00:40:36.820
wee bit, the football obviously still takes your beloved team,
1011
00:40:36.920 --> 00:40:39.559
which are favourite games, favourite, seasons?
1012
00:40:39.900 --> 00:40:42.480
Favourites, so I never, again, when I was, so growing up,
1013
00:40:42.480 --> 00:40:45.079
my dad worked in a night shift, he's worked in
1014
00:40:45.179 --> 00:40:47.739
a night shift at UIE, he was a welder, so,
1015
00:40:47.860 --> 00:40:52.449
you know, my childhood, the majority was my mum, my
1016
00:40:52.489 --> 00:40:55.010
brother and my sister, you know what I mean, so,
1017
00:40:55.610 --> 00:40:56.929
it's not like I had somebody who could take me
1018
00:40:56.949 --> 00:40:59.510
to go and watch the fitment, for example, so, you know,
1019
00:40:59.750 --> 00:41:01.530
growing up, I remember watching the school cup final and
1020
00:41:01.550 --> 00:41:03.989
all that, and having like a Celtic trip, but I
1021
00:41:04.030 --> 00:41:07.050
wanted to go to Celtic, but didn't have anyone to
1022
00:41:07.070 --> 00:41:08.860
take me and then a woman at our church Louise
1023
00:41:08.880 --> 00:41:10.599
Cricosa went and said to my mum I'll take him
1024
00:41:10.619 --> 00:41:13.199
to see Patrick Thistle and so he's still going to
1025
00:41:13.219 --> 00:41:17.079
see Patrick Thistle and my mum used to teach Keep
1026
00:41:17.139 --> 00:41:19.619
Fit in Somerset and used to teach Jim Duffy's wife
1027
00:41:20.239 --> 00:41:23.800
so Duff's two is down flying from like my 8th
1028
00:41:23.820 --> 00:41:25.260
or 9th birthday I think he took us down to
1029
00:41:25.280 --> 00:41:27.699
Far Hill you know like just into the training the
1030
00:41:27.719 --> 00:41:29.699
dressing room and all that and then my dad worked
1031
00:41:29.739 --> 00:41:32.820
with Albert Craig's brother in the night shifts in the
1032
00:41:32.840 --> 00:41:36.809
yards so I was a I was a mascot for
1033
00:41:36.849 --> 00:41:41.630
Thistle against Celtic and George Shaw scored the winner and
1034
00:41:41.909 --> 00:41:44.010
then he moved to Dundee after that so I kind
1035
00:41:44.050 --> 00:41:46.519
of watched a lot of Thistle games when I was maybe.
1036
00:41:46.280 --> 00:41:48.360
8, 9 and 10 I started playing amateur.
1037
00:41:48.119 --> 00:41:52.559
Football but I've never really been in many games at
1038
00:41:52.599 --> 00:41:56.420
Celtic but probably probably the first proper game I remember
1039
00:41:56.440 --> 00:41:58.960
like going in really loving was the game 2 you
1040
00:41:58.980 --> 00:41:59.980
scored in.
1041
00:41:59.960 --> 00:42:02.699
That temporary stand for the Liverpool game Liverpool.
1042
00:42:02.670 --> 00:42:05.679
Aye 2-2 I was there aye just You weren't in
1043
00:42:05.699 --> 00:42:07.280
the temporary stand were you?
1044
00:42:07.300 --> 00:42:08.449
Aye I was Were you?
1045
00:42:08.590 --> 00:42:10.789
We were behind the goal and you put the penalty
1046
00:42:10.829 --> 00:42:14.889
in off the bar because I remember I remember going
1047
00:42:15.050 --> 00:42:17.739
ah fucking 90 minutes and McManaman's picked up the ball
1048
00:42:17.760 --> 00:42:19.440
to this day it's one of the best goals I've
1049
00:42:19.500 --> 00:42:22.119
ever seen and look Michael Owen scoring do you know
1050
00:42:22.139 --> 00:42:22.500
what I mean?
1051
00:42:22.539 --> 00:42:24.159
Scored that early on didn't he?
1052
00:42:24.380 --> 00:42:28.349
I was there I loved going to the Champions League
1053
00:42:28.369 --> 00:42:30.829
games under Martyn O'Neill because I fell in with a
1054
00:42:30.829 --> 00:42:33.070
group of boys from Dunbarton who were just normal punters,
1055
00:42:33.309 --> 00:42:35.050
they were all mad Celtic fans and that was at
1056
00:42:35.070 --> 00:42:36.679
the time when you could queue up for the Champions
1057
00:42:36.699 --> 00:42:38.389
League tickets, you didn't have a season book, you just
1058
00:42:38.409 --> 00:42:41.300
queued up for the tickets, you know.
1059
00:42:41.980 --> 00:42:44.239
On the night? No, you used to do it.
1060
00:42:44.260 --> 00:42:46.619
It was at the start, they would announce the package
1061
00:42:46.820 --> 00:42:48.420
and then they did it, you queued up, there was
1062
00:42:48.440 --> 00:42:50.139
no online, first come, first served.
1063
00:42:50.159 --> 00:42:51.420
We used to come up to the training room, we
1064
00:42:51.440 --> 00:42:55.110
obviously had changed there and trained at Barrowfield and the
1065
00:42:55.199 --> 00:42:58.159
queues would be right down past the school or along
1066
00:42:58.199 --> 00:42:59.099
the road so.
1067
00:42:58.920 --> 00:43:00.940
You would go up there and queue queue for a
1068
00:43:00.980 --> 00:43:03.199
couple of hours you'd get the three and it was
1069
00:43:03.219 --> 00:43:06.840
like £ 90 back then so I remember you know like
1070
00:43:06.880 --> 00:43:11.539
that the Lyon Bayern Munich game because I still quite
1071
00:43:11.559 --> 00:43:13.139
proud of Adrian Dunham for a time and I remember
1072
00:43:13.659 --> 00:43:15.230
when I thought when I retired I was like he's
1073
00:43:15.250 --> 00:43:17.889
the fucking German McNamara and Adrian Dunham was like Jackie
1074
00:43:17.909 --> 00:43:20.880
McNamara one of my favourite football players because I remember
1075
00:43:20.920 --> 00:43:22.639
you were playing left back in the Champions League so
1076
00:43:22.659 --> 00:43:24.480
stuff like that you know like with Big Sutton just
1077
00:43:24.980 --> 00:43:27.920
chesting every body for 60 yards and all that that
1078
00:43:27.960 --> 00:43:31.219
was a the UV game no I wasnae I wasnae
1079
00:43:31.400 --> 00:43:33.389
I didn't even make any of those games but I
1080
00:43:33.409 --> 00:43:37.510
was there those two seasons after seen us beat Barcelona
1081
00:43:37.530 --> 00:43:39.989
twice I was there I was in the Barcelona end
1082
00:43:40.369 --> 00:43:43.369
for the game where Thompson scored where everybody gets sent
1083
00:43:43.429 --> 00:43:46.329
off and it was chaos because my mate runs an
1084
00:43:46.349 --> 00:43:49.230
Irish pub in Barcelona so he got his tickets and
1085
00:43:49.250 --> 00:43:50.909
that was Incredible.
1086
00:43:50.929 --> 00:43:53.260
That's the best You'll Never Walk Alone.
1087
00:43:53.199 --> 00:43:54.880
I've ever heard in my life because that was, they
1088
00:43:54.920 --> 00:43:57.960
dedicated that to the people of the Madrid bombings taking
1089
00:43:58.000 --> 00:44:01.239
place that day and it was lit even now the
1090
00:44:01.260 --> 00:44:04.260
hairs on my neck are standing up and because you're
1091
00:44:04.380 --> 00:44:07.159
in that little pocket just away from it you can
1092
00:44:07.260 --> 00:44:09.900
really hear the magnitude of how it goes.
1093
00:44:09.940 --> 00:44:11.719
Did you say you were in the bus or anything?
1094
00:44:11.739 --> 00:44:14.340
I was in the little corner, aye, aye, Niall Dempsey,
1095
00:44:14.360 --> 00:44:15.860
not Niall Dempsey I worked with him but it's Brian's son,
1096
00:44:15.889 --> 00:44:19.130
Niall something Niall who runs the Michael Collins pub in
1097
00:44:19.150 --> 00:44:20.809
Barcelona he got his tickets and we were in me
1098
00:44:20.829 --> 00:44:23.630
and my mate Nicky fucking grabbing each other it was
1099
00:44:24.010 --> 00:44:27.829
really emotional and I actually had my 21st round about
1100
00:44:27.849 --> 00:44:30.639
then and I took my da as a surprise to
1101
00:44:30.659 --> 00:44:33.079
the away leg so I was in.
1102
00:44:35.440 --> 00:44:36.159
The camp now for.
1103
00:44:36.079 --> 00:44:40.960
The Nile Nile game with Marshall and John Kennedy and
1104
00:44:41.000 --> 00:44:42.869
Diddy the Gat got his ticket as well so I
1105
00:44:42.889 --> 00:44:44.989
got two tickets for Niall but I knew Diddy from
1106
00:44:45.010 --> 00:44:48.550
when I worked in well I because I worked on
1107
00:44:48.570 --> 00:44:51.269
Cruise and I DJed on Trash so he used to
1108
00:44:51.289 --> 00:44:53.849
come in he used to come in to buy Cruise
1109
00:44:53.949 --> 00:44:54.889
and Trash he used.
1110
00:44:54.809 --> 00:44:58.670
To come in to buy women's shoes for women.
1111
00:45:00.090 --> 00:45:02.920
So we went down to that hotel his arse hotel
1112
00:45:02.940 --> 00:45:03.920
remember me.
1113
00:45:03.900 --> 00:45:06.539
And my dad that's fucking 25 euro for a vodka.
1114
00:45:06.400 --> 00:45:09.159
And orange and we went and got so I didn't
1115
00:45:09.179 --> 00:45:10.780
need this ticket but obviously he did he's got us
1116
00:45:10.840 --> 00:45:12.820
a ticket and me and my dad went tell you
1117
00:45:12.840 --> 00:45:14.900
what we'll do we'll just get to the first person
1118
00:45:14.940 --> 00:45:17.739
that I saw We'd always love to find out who
1119
00:45:17.760 --> 00:45:19.679
that would be, but as we got outside the stadiums, I.
1120
00:45:19.659 --> 00:45:21.019
Was like, mate, you get a spare ticket, I'm right here,
1121
00:45:21.039 --> 00:45:23.119
just take that one. And they're like, what? Seriously, I'm
1122
00:45:23.159 --> 00:45:25.940
right here, just take it, mate. So that was good.
1123
00:45:26.000 --> 00:45:28.500
And then I was at the other Barcelona game. I
1124
00:45:28.539 --> 00:45:31.139
was at the Tony Watt. I was there for that.
1125
00:45:31.300 --> 00:45:33.619
You were there as well, weren't you? Main stand, we
1126
00:45:33.639 --> 00:45:35.519
were across. I took my son. You took your boy
1127
00:45:35.539 --> 00:45:36.260
and I took my boy.
1128
00:45:36.320 --> 00:45:40.199
I had to take my son out. He was, obviously
1129
00:45:40.239 --> 00:45:41.800
I'd never seen him. He was too young to see
1130
00:45:41.840 --> 00:45:44.449
me playing at Celtic. I took him to that game
1131
00:45:44.469 --> 00:45:47.809
and he loved Messi. and then we're up a few
1132
00:45:47.869 --> 00:45:51.639
of my mates just at half when we scored first
1133
00:45:51.900 --> 00:45:55.039
and he starts creeping in the air because Messi's getting
1134
00:45:55.059 --> 00:45:58.480
beat he wanted Messi to win I was like that
1135
00:45:58.539 --> 00:46:00.679
I was raging I was like that at half time
1136
00:46:01.119 --> 00:46:03.619
the noise he's just scared of the noise and then
1137
00:46:03.699 --> 00:46:06.130
when Tony Watts scored the whole place I had to
1138
00:46:06.150 --> 00:46:09.449
take him out and then he scored Your dad's been
1139
00:46:09.489 --> 00:46:12.409
here for 10 years, he's like that, sitting there with
1140
00:46:12.570 --> 00:46:14.210
all you boys in the car, took him out of
1141
00:46:14.230 --> 00:46:16.449
the car park and waited for everybody, and he's sitting
1142
00:46:16.469 --> 00:46:18.070
like that, I said, I'm not taking you back here again,
1143
00:46:18.630 --> 00:46:25.110
I don't care, I hate them, just sitting.
1144
00:46:22.690 --> 00:46:26.750
Like that, then Messi scored, made it 2-1.
1145
00:46:26.809 --> 00:46:29.260
That was incredible.
1146
00:46:29.340 --> 00:46:32.119
But because you don't go often, it's always a real
1147
00:46:32.139 --> 00:46:34.639
privilege for me when you do go, but I used
1148
00:46:34.659 --> 00:46:37.969
to love going at Setanta, just being the you built
1149
00:46:38.030 --> 00:46:39.590
on the gantry just logging the game because you were.
1150
00:46:39.510 --> 00:46:42.190
Just Was Burley at Satanta with you? He was, Butler,
1151
00:46:42.289 --> 00:46:43.530
aye Uncle Butler.
1152
00:46:43.429 --> 00:46:46.309
Before his American accent Aye.
1153
00:46:46.269 --> 00:46:48.820
Well what's funny is we were just chatting you know
1154
00:46:48.840 --> 00:46:50.920
like sometimes you make a bit of criticism if you're
1155
00:46:50.940 --> 00:46:54.659
speaking out on certain things and I remember I remember
1156
00:46:54.739 --> 00:47:00.239
I remember the I remember the drama when Burley was
1157
00:47:00.369 --> 00:47:02.409
criticised because when we were going to Nightsuit with Burley
1158
00:47:02.429 --> 00:47:03.969
I was like I used to wear the long-sleeved select
1159
00:47:03.989 --> 00:47:05.429
top and all that you know it was Craig Burley
1160
00:47:05.469 --> 00:47:07.949
and like And then he's fucking like, we're the right lads,
1161
00:47:07.969 --> 00:47:11.050
you know, him and Keegs would go, and I remember,
1162
00:47:11.070 --> 00:47:12.210
who was it that.
1163
00:47:12.110 --> 00:47:12.619
Was phoning him?
1164
00:47:13.590 --> 00:47:17.389
Paul Lambert was phoning, we'd go for a drink after
1165
00:47:18.010 --> 00:47:20.329
the live programme, we'd go out on a Sunday, and
1166
00:47:20.349 --> 00:47:22.070
we'd go into the little conference room, STV, and there'd
1167
00:47:22.090 --> 00:47:22.650
be wine and.
1168
00:47:22.590 --> 00:47:25.449
Beer and all that, and fucking, Paul, what do you
1169
00:47:25.469 --> 00:47:26.050
want me to do?
1170
00:47:26.710 --> 00:47:28.309
And the manager's not happy about some of the things,
1171
00:47:28.349 --> 00:47:30.449
because I remember at one point, Martin Neil didn't speak
1172
00:47:30.469 --> 00:47:33.920
to the reporters for about a month or two, there
1173
00:47:33.940 --> 00:47:35.440
was like a mad fallout and all that, so it was,
1174
00:47:36.449 --> 00:47:38.449
kind of brilliant I love a gossip man this is
1175
00:47:38.469 --> 00:47:40.570
amazing do you know what I mean then you'd see
1176
00:47:40.590 --> 00:47:42.389
Neil Lennon out fucking in Ashton Lane do you know
1177
00:47:42.409 --> 00:47:43.269
what I mean through the week and.
1178
00:47:43.230 --> 00:47:44.809
Stuff like that she'd been out a few times with
1179
00:47:44.829 --> 00:47:47.670
Burley aye loads of times aye to ever put his
1180
00:47:47.730 --> 00:47:48.650
teeth in your drink.
1181
00:47:48.969 --> 00:47:50.510
No he never did that no because I think at
1182
00:47:50.550 --> 00:47:57.300
that point he'd got implants because he'd finished playing he'd implants.
1183
00:47:56.579 --> 00:47:59.260
He'd done it to me one night in TGI's with
1184
00:47:59.460 --> 00:48:03.320
the cocktails and I'm sitting there and I've finished my
1185
00:48:03.340 --> 00:48:05.800
drink and I was like his teeth's hitting my mouth
1186
00:48:06.659 --> 00:48:08.300
I was like, and all the boys, they all knew
1187
00:48:08.380 --> 00:48:09.880
it was going on. I was like, because that was
1188
00:48:09.920 --> 00:48:12.199
his party piece. He'd either do that or put in
1189
00:48:12.219 --> 00:48:15.500
someone's sandwich or roll. I was like, you're fucking bastard.
1190
00:48:15.519 --> 00:48:17.599
We're in TGIs in Glasgow. So I took it out
1191
00:48:17.619 --> 00:48:19.969
of my glass and went, as if I flung it
1192
00:48:20.010 --> 00:48:24.050
across TGIs. And he's like, you're a fucking wee bastard.
1193
00:48:24.769 --> 00:48:27.969
And everybody, all the staff, but I'd kept it. He
1194
00:48:27.989 --> 00:48:29.289
thought I'd flung him out of the air. He's like,
1195
00:48:29.349 --> 00:48:31.829
I'm fucking going home. I put my teeth up naked.
1196
00:48:31.849 --> 00:48:38.650
Some character, he's hated me out. By the way, what
1197
00:48:38.829 --> 00:48:41.889
was funny about Burley, for me, because obviously you just think,
1198
00:48:42.469 --> 00:48:45.380
he's quite cantankerous, the big man, very antagonistic.
1199
00:48:45.880 --> 00:48:47.880
So people would come up, they'd be like, oh, fucking
1200
00:48:47.920 --> 00:48:49.940
big man, fucking love you. I know you love the Celtic.
1201
00:48:49.960 --> 00:48:52.639
And they'd be like, I don't support Celtic, mate. And
1202
00:48:52.659 --> 00:48:54.210
they'd be like, what? He went, I don't support Celtic,
1203
00:48:54.230 --> 00:48:56.969
I support Chelsea, mate. I played for him for 10 years,
1204
00:48:57.110 --> 00:49:00.170
he would just say things like that. Conversation stopper.
1205
00:49:00.230 --> 00:49:03.070
You would just see him, do you know what I mean?
1206
00:49:03.199 --> 00:49:04.119
I'd start a fight.
1207
00:49:04.739 --> 00:49:06.719
I think he was like that when he first came
1208
00:49:06.739 --> 00:49:09.800
to Sutton. Sutton was like that and he was shy.
1209
00:49:09.820 --> 00:49:11.760
So he would go and stand there and people would
1210
00:49:11.780 --> 00:49:13.889
come up to him and he'd be rude or that.
1211
00:49:13.949 --> 00:49:16.869
I'm going, he's going to start selling fans or whatever,
1212
00:49:16.909 --> 00:49:19.329
start a fight. And he didn't know what he engaged,
1213
00:49:19.369 --> 00:49:21.809
he'd just stand there at the pugging machine or looking
1214
00:49:21.849 --> 00:49:23.050
at that or quiet.
1215
00:49:23.269 --> 00:49:25.269
I think that's difficult for people as well just in
1216
00:49:25.309 --> 00:49:27.889
regard that, because you do, if you think, when you
1217
00:49:27.909 --> 00:49:30.389
see people, whether it's online or obviously football is different,
1218
00:49:30.429 --> 00:49:32.070
but you see them, you think you know them.
1219
00:49:32.510 --> 00:49:35.539
So I think they call that parasocial. And you get it,
1220
00:49:35.809 --> 00:49:37.670
like just what we were discussing, a lot of people
1221
00:49:37.690 --> 00:49:39.070
are not particularly outgoing.
1222
00:49:39.090 --> 00:49:41.159
They don't, like talking to people, they might be a
1223
00:49:41.179 --> 00:49:44.630
bit shy or insular, it's the same sort of thing,
1224
00:49:44.670 --> 00:49:46.829
so it's kind of, I do get it, do you
1225
00:49:46.849 --> 00:49:48.869
know what I mean, and people obviously are like, ah,
1226
00:49:48.909 --> 00:49:50.590
big man, and a couple of times they do say, well, I.
1227
00:49:50.530 --> 00:49:55.070
Mean, I don't support selling, and you're.
1228
00:49:53.809 --> 00:49:55.869
Like, fucking hell. Shut the conversation.
1229
00:49:55.909 --> 00:49:58.179
When I had, what's really funny is I hadn't spoken
1230
00:49:58.280 --> 00:50:00.239
to him for months at one point, nearly a year
1231
00:50:00.260 --> 00:50:02.940
just working on something different, and then I'd had this fight,
1232
00:50:02.960 --> 00:50:05.119
and it was the office gossip, and I was straight
1233
00:50:05.139 --> 00:50:08.050
to the phone, Tell your Uncle Walter about what happened
1234
00:50:08.070 --> 00:50:10.340
straight on the phone, just desperate for the gossip.
1235
00:50:11.440 --> 00:50:13.559
Well, you've been a great guest, mate. We're going to
1236
00:50:13.579 --> 00:50:18.679
finish with some recommendations. Our last guest, Frank Goholy, recommends
1237
00:50:18.719 --> 00:50:19.860
an album, a song and a film.
1238
00:50:20.119 --> 00:50:23.699
Okay. So, his album's Hunky Dory by David Bowie. Right.
1239
00:50:24.590 --> 00:50:26.730
I actually listened to this on the way home the
1240
00:50:26.750 --> 00:50:28.170
last time. There's a lot of songs on it that
1241
00:50:28.190 --> 00:50:30.530
I know about. Yeah, I like it by Bowie. His
1242
00:50:30.650 --> 00:50:34.989
song is from Lindisfarne. Winter song. What is that, about
1243
00:50:35.030 --> 00:50:37.969
classical music or something? No, do you not remember, Gazza
1244
00:50:37.989 --> 00:50:40.570
did a song with him, Fogging the Time, Lindisfarne. Okay.
1245
00:50:40.989 --> 00:50:42.809
It's not Fogging the Time, is it? It's not, it's
1246
00:50:42.969 --> 00:50:45.920
a song called Winter Song. Winter Song. And his film
1247
00:50:46.059 --> 00:50:49.860
is Dr. Zhivago, an old classic, which I've not watched. Yeah,
1248
00:50:49.900 --> 00:50:51.039
I've not watched either.
1249
00:50:51.500 --> 00:50:53.139
I remember the thing we were making a reference to, Dr.
1250
00:50:53.159 --> 00:50:56.550
Zhivago and Trainspotting, I'm sure, or something like that. Right, right.
1251
00:50:56.949 --> 00:50:59.130
So I've not seen it. So can you recommend to
1252
00:50:59.170 --> 00:51:01.449
our next guest an album, a song and a film?
1253
00:51:01.929 --> 00:51:04.869
The album I would go for Future Islands I think
1254
00:51:04.909 --> 00:51:07.269
it's called Singles is the name of the album that's
1255
00:51:07.289 --> 00:51:11.449
the one that's got Seasons Lighthouse Back in the Tallgrass
1256
00:51:11.469 --> 00:51:12.900
you know the band Future Islands the guy that does
1257
00:51:12.920 --> 00:51:15.260
the mad dancing he was on Jules Holland a few
1258
00:51:15.280 --> 00:51:18.900
years ago they went they're tremendous I've seen them Future
1259
00:51:18.960 --> 00:51:22.059
Islands oh as soon as you see the guy dancing
1260
00:51:22.880 --> 00:51:25.130
I watched the one Jules Holland's hitting on me about
1261
00:51:25.650 --> 00:51:28.090
nearly like 10 years ago, and like, everyone was howling,
1262
00:51:28.239 --> 00:51:30.280
at the way this guy was dancing, but he puts
1263
00:51:30.320 --> 00:51:31.760
his heart and soul into it, and he does like
1264
00:51:31.780 --> 00:51:33.940
mad death growls, so sometimes he just won't sing the lyric,
1265
00:51:34.019 --> 00:51:36.590
and he's, you can't take your eyes off him, and
1266
00:51:36.610 --> 00:51:38.409
they've got a few absolute bangers, and I've been to
1267
00:51:38.429 --> 00:51:40.469
see them twice, saw them at the Barrowlands, and I
1268
00:51:40.510 --> 00:51:46.030
saw them at the bandstand, they are brilliant, absolutely brilliant.
1269
00:51:46.110 --> 00:51:50.300
My song would be Rain In The Summertime by Mike
1270
00:51:50.360 --> 00:51:53.179
Peters and The Alarm, so they are a Welsh punk
1271
00:51:53.219 --> 00:51:56.500
rock band, Mike Peters just passed away recently, but they
1272
00:51:56.519 --> 00:51:59.880
opened I think 22 times for U2, they opened for
1273
00:51:59.900 --> 00:52:02.219
The Stones and all that, they were kind of like
1274
00:52:02.239 --> 00:52:06.329
the Welsh equivalent of U2, and they had a couple
1275
00:52:06.409 --> 00:52:07.889
of hits in the 80s, but I've been to see
1276
00:52:07.909 --> 00:52:10.159
them when I was about five year old with my
1277
00:52:10.199 --> 00:52:11.460
brother at the Barrowlands what's.
1278
00:52:11.320 --> 00:52:12.019
The song called again?
1279
00:52:12.179 --> 00:52:13.940
Called Rain in the Summertime that might have been their
1280
00:52:13.980 --> 00:52:16.480
highest charting hit but it's a brilliant song and I
1281
00:52:16.480 --> 00:52:20.010
always think as a Scottish person you cannot help but
1282
00:52:20.070 --> 00:52:23.409
love that relate to it definitely and my film my
1283
00:52:23.510 --> 00:52:28.369
film would be Heat Michael Mann 95 De Niro and
1284
00:52:28.389 --> 00:52:31.630
Pacino and for me I mean I've had that in
1285
00:52:31.650 --> 00:52:33.510
VHS I've had it in DVD I've had it in
1286
00:52:33.530 --> 00:52:36.099
Blu-ray and I've got it on my Apple my films
1287
00:52:36.119 --> 00:52:39.679
because I watch it They're doing a sequel to that?
1288
00:52:39.699 --> 00:52:44.219
They've written, yeah, so Michael Mann has written actually a novel,
1289
00:52:44.380 --> 00:52:46.380
so I think he always wanted to do like a sequel,
1290
00:52:46.480 --> 00:52:48.210
and then he said that when he started fleshing it out,
1291
00:52:48.940 --> 00:52:51.360
he's actually ended up writing a proper novel, so my
1292
00:52:51.400 --> 00:52:54.420
mate read it, we're big Heat fans, so I downloaded
1293
00:52:54.460 --> 00:52:56.800
it on the Kindle, and I was like, first couple
1294
00:52:56.860 --> 00:53:01.059
of pages, it's set right in the aftermath of the film,
1295
00:53:01.800 --> 00:53:03.380
but also then there's a bit of an origin story,
1296
00:53:03.400 --> 00:53:05.369
so it kind of goes back and forward, So I
1297
00:53:05.389 --> 00:53:07.309
was a bit like that, alright, okay, mate, we get it,
1298
00:53:07.329 --> 00:53:10.079
we get it, because it keeps referencing things that happened
1299
00:53:10.119 --> 00:53:12.360
at the end of the film, but see, after that,
1300
00:53:12.400 --> 00:53:13.960
I got in it, it's like a big crime novel,
1301
00:53:14.039 --> 00:53:16.019
it's like 300 or 400 pages, it's brilliant.
1302
00:53:16.280 --> 00:53:17.340
Just like a right, good.
1303
00:53:17.380 --> 00:53:21.840
Enjoyable sort of crime caper, so I'm looking forward to it.
1304
00:53:21.860 --> 00:53:23.800
I think DiCaprio.
1305
00:53:23.159 --> 00:53:26.949
Plays the Val Kilmer role, he's the guy that escapes,
1306
00:53:27.010 --> 00:53:30.409
so DiCaprio plays him, and I think Christian Bale plays like...
1307
00:53:31.400 --> 00:53:34.199
the young Al Pacino role as the Vincent Hanna, the
1308
00:53:34.400 --> 00:53:34.880
cop and all.
1309
00:53:34.840 --> 00:53:36.210
That, so we'll see how it pans out.
1310
00:53:36.230 --> 00:53:39.900
Alright, good recommendation mate, great guest, thanks for coming on.
1311
00:53:39.909 --> 00:53:40.940
Thanks for having me on.