Men Communicate Distress Through Behaviour Rather Than Words - Dr Stephen Blumenthal on Self Expression

Many men struggle to understand, express, or even recognise what they are feeling. They often communicate distress not through words but through behaviour, and sometimes in ways that are self-destructive. Excessive drinking, withdrawing from friendships, over-investing time in work or reckless risk-taking can act as signals that something is wrong internally, and are far from uncommon.
This week Paul speaks to acclaimed clinical psychologist and psychoanalyst Dr Stephen Blumenthal about the hidden emotional lives of men. He talks about how many men express emotional conflict through action rather than language, and about how these behaviours are often rooted in what he calls 'trauma patterns' - adaptive responses formed in childhood or early life that help individuals cope with difficult environments but may later interfere with intimacy and emotional connection.
Stephen explores how social expectations of masculinity shape men’s emotional lives, and how there can be a disconnect between what men feel and what they are able to articulate. And he highlights the importance of self-awareness and reflection. But rather than simply encouraging men to 'express their feelings, he argues that the real work lies in developing a language for inner experience and understanding the emotional signals beneath behaviours, and that a willingness to examine one’s inner life is among the most powerful foundations for long-term wellbeing.
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