Part 5: Bane

WEBVTT
NOTE
This file was generated by Descript
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JACK: [Music] Hell is other people.
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Jean-Paul Sartre said
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that, and I’m glad he did.
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It’s one of those truths that stings
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because it’s both simple and inescapable.
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Sartre wasn't talking
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about hatred or conflict.
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He was talking about the way we're
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seen, how other people become mirrors
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that reflect us back to ourselves.
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See, Sartre believed that we
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don't fully know who we are
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without the gaze of others.
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You can think you're smart or kind
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or brave, but if no one else sees
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it, it starts to feel unreal, like
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a tree falling in an empty forest.
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Does it even matter if no one hears it?
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When others don't see you for who
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you believe you are, it creates
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this void, this chasm between your
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identity and their perception of it.
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That’s where the isolation creeps
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in, the loneliness, the self-doubt.
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But here's the trap; if your
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self-worth depends on someone else’s
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validation, you're no longer free.
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You're shackled to their gaze,
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a prisoner of their judgment.
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You bend yourself to fit their
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expectations, hoping they’ll see you,
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hoping they’ll understand you, and
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when they don't, it’s devastating.
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You can feel invisible,
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like you don't exist.
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So, there’s this inescapable tension
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where one side is pulling at us to be
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authentic to ourselves and not care what
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anyone thinks of us, and the other side
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is pulling us towards wanting validation,
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wanting to be seen, confirmation that
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who we think we are we really are.
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Sartre says it’s impossible to escape
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this tension because it’ll always exist.
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We need to learn how to manage it and
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live with it without it enslaving us.
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Zachariah’s life is proof to what
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that tension looks like to an extreme.
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He’s so far beyond what society
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can accept that he has to disappear
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and never let anyone see him.
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To survive he has to be invisible, but in
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the shadows he’s still choosing who he is
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moment by moment in spite of the silence.
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Because for some people, the point
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isn't to be seen by the world.
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It’s to keep carving your name
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into it even when no one’s looking.
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[To Zachariah]
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So, where did you end up that night
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when you left Nick’s apartment?
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ZACHARIAH: I went over
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to my plug’s apartment.
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JACK: Your plug?
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ZACHARIAH: Yeah.
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You know what a plug is?
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JACK: I thought it was — it’s
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not a plumber, is it?
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It’s someone who plugs your toilet?
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ZACHARIAH: The fuck?
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No.
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A plug is a drug dealer.
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JACK: Oh, okay.
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ZACHARIAH: I went over there and
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asked if I could stay there for
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a few days, and he said okay.
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But yeah, I just basically smoked — I
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think I smoked seven grams of pot
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that first night, and I’ve never
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been that high in my life, no joke.
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I was stoned for five straight days.
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JACK: You were just like,
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fuck it, let’s get high.
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ZACHARIAH: Yeah, pretty much.
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I didn't want to think about life at all.
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I watched movies, ate pizza,
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and just turned off for a while.
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JACK: Okay, what happens
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after those five days?
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ZACHARIAH: I saw that my plug
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was buying drugs off the dark
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web, so we connected over that.
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I showed him what I know and he showed
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me what he knows, and we started
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talking about the dark web more.
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He showed me this place that he found
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where pedophiles prey on young boys, and
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I thought, how fucking awful is that?
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It made me so mad that some
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old-ass dudes were going on
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this site looking to rape kids.
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But this guy didn't want me to
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stay there for long, so I had to
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leave and find another place to go.
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The only people I knew were junkies,
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so I asked them if they know of any
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place, and one of them said that they
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heard about this old man that died
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in some neighborhood, and they wanted to
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see what the house was like after he died.
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So, me and this other guy go,
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and yeah, it’s a nice house.
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Nobody’s home.
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The house is secluded, too.
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Like, there’s no one around for a while
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to watch you or see what you're doing.
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We look around and we find a window that
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we could slide open, and we crawled in.
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Yeah, it’s nice inside, too.
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It was like an old man’s house.
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But there was furniture in there, and
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the guy who lived there died somewhere.
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I guess he just had no family or anything
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to take care of his house after he died.
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So, it was just sitting
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there doing nothing.
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We decided to sleep there.
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JACK: You just took over an empty house.
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ZACHARIAH: Yeah.
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JACK: Did the house have electricity on?
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ZACHARIAH: Yes, at first it did.
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JACK: For real?
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ZACHARIAH: Yeah, but
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there was no internet.
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We didn't even get any
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neighbors’ Wi-Fi or anything.
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JACK: How long did you stay there?
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ZACHARIAH: I’m still
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living here right now.
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This is where I’m talking to you from.
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But the electricity stopped
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working after a while.
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Remember I told you that I jumped
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the electric meter earlier?
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Well, this is where I did that.
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I’m getting — we're getting
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free electricity here.
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JACK: [Laughs] I used to think that
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was a big deal, and now I’m like,
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that’s such a minor part of your story.
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Okay, how long have you been there?
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ZACHARIAH: About a year now.
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A few people live here with me, too.
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We even have dogs here.
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JACK: So, how old are you now?
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ZACHARIAH: I just turned eighteen.
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JACK: Okay, then — I’m afraid to ask.
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ZACHARIAH: Go ahead.
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JACK: What happened in the
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last year living in this house?
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ZACHARIAH: [Music] Yeah,
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this is where it gets good.
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This — we're finally at the
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part that I e-mailed you about.
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This is why I contacted you to
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begin with, is just to talk about
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what we're gonna talk about next.
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JACK: Does the story get darker?
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ZACHARIAH: Yeah, I think so.
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JACK: Goddamn.
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I don't know if I could take anymore.
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We're not at the end, huh?
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ZACHARIAH: Yeah, no.
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There is a lot more to talk about.
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JACK: Jesus Christ, dude.
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Okay, give me a minute.
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ZACHARIAH: [Laughs]
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JACK: Life is treacherous.
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Sometimes when you look at the
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chaos of the world, it’s easy
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to feel superior, to walk around
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thinking, look at these idiots.
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I’m glad I’m not like them.
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But that feeling, that sense
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of superiority, it’s a trap.
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It’s a dangerous, isolating trap.
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Here's the paradox; if you feel
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superior to others, you crave their
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confirmation that you're above them.
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You need them to see
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it, to acknowledge it.
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But how can they confirm it
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when you've already decided that
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their opinion doesn't matter?
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If you think someone is beneath you,
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their validation means nothing to you.
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Their respect holds no weight.
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So, this belief in your superiority,
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it’s a house of cards built on air.
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It can never stand because it relies
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on something you've already dismissed.
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The more you cling to that feeling,
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the more you cut yourself off,
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superiority doesn't make you stronger.
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It makes you lonelier.
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It isolates you.
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It turns the world into a place full of
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people whose voices you refuse to hear.
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The superior person must either
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accept that unbearable loneliness
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or give up the illusion altogether.
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It’s only when you stop fearing
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the world’s opinion that you can
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finally be free and stand tall in it.
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This is Low, Part 5, Bane.
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[To Zachariah] Okay, I’m ready.
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What happens next?
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ZACHARIAH: Well, I continue
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selling drugs, obviously.
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But by now I was just purchasing them on
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Wall Street and then selling it locally.
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JACK: Wall Street, that’s a
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darknet marketplace, isn't it?
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ZACHARIAH: Yeah, yeah.
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JACK: So, you finally were living the
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dream that you wanted of buying drugs from
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the dark web and then selling it locally
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just like that guy was doing in Russia.
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ZACHARIAH: Yeah, exactly.
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I had runners working for me.
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JACK: Do people listen to a kid like that?
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ZACHARIAH: Well, when you speak
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to them in a thick Russian
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accent, they don't question you.
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JACK: Dude, don't tell me you wrote
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a fucking crypto-boom and this
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story ends up with you becoming a
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millionaire with Lambos and shit.
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ZACHARIAH: No, fuck.
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I don't even have an ID.
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I can't even buy a Lambo
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even if I was a millionaire.
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JACK: Okay.
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ZACHARIAH: [Music] Someone at the house
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knew that I would go on the dark web
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to buy drugs, and they mentioned that
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I should watch out for pedos on there.
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Again, I was starting to get angry again
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about the pedos being on there and shit.
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So, I went to that website that I
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learned about where pedophiles go,
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and I just chilled there for a long
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time watching what people do there.
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It fucking made me so angry that
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I made an account acting like
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I was thirteen-year-old boy.
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I used my real voice because I
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wasn't much older than that, and it
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was easy for me to manipulate them
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into thinking I was just thirteen.
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I started talking to people
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in private messages and stuff.
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JACK: Wait, so, tell me some
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of the stuff you were saying.
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ZACHARIAH: I first had
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to come up with a name.
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I don't want to use my real name,
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of course, so I just put my name
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as David on there, and to make
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it look like I’m a real person, I
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made a Facebook account for David.
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I just found pictures of some kid playing
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baseball, and I put those photos on there.
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Then I would go on the forum
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and just act like an innocent
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boy who didn't know any better.
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JACK: Oh, this is ridiculous.
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Why would a young boy even
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be on these dark web forums?
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Nobody believes this, do they?
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ZACHARIAH: Well, I created this story
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where my dad was an alcoholic and
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I needed to find a way to escape,
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and I missed having a fatherly
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figure who actually wanted me.
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Then I asked if anybody knows
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of a place I can go where
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someone will actually love me.
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JACK: Hm.
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ZACHARIAH: People believe
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that shit, let me tell you.
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People will believe anything
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they want if they're desperate.
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You just have to find that one
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person who’s looking at you
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through their blind spot, and then
00:10:50.429 --> 00:10:52.209
you could just take them over.
00:10:53.089 --> 00:10:53.949
You make them feel like
00:10:53.969 --> 00:10:55.449
they are in control and they
00:10:55.459 --> 00:10:56.709
have an advantage over you.
00:10:57.519 --> 00:10:59.139
The trick is to get them to come to you.
00:10:59.139 --> 00:11:00.160
If you approach them,
00:11:00.639 --> 00:11:01.789
they probably won't reply.
00:11:02.300 --> 00:11:04.099
But if it’s their idea to talk to
00:11:04.099 --> 00:11:06.239
you, then they can't resist it.
00:11:06.800 --> 00:11:08.379
So, for me, I would bait them and
00:11:08.379 --> 00:11:10.130
say things that weren't true so
00:11:10.130 --> 00:11:11.759
that they would have to correct me.
00:11:12.429 --> 00:11:13.779
Like, I would talk about baseball but I
00:11:13.779 --> 00:11:15.750
would say the wrong team name sometimes.
00:11:15.910 --> 00:11:18.099
Like, I said once the San Francisco
00:11:18.099 --> 00:11:20.529
Padres, and somebody corrected me and
00:11:20.529 --> 00:11:22.270
they told me what the right team name is.
00:11:22.660 --> 00:11:24.819
Then I told them, oh, I’d love
00:11:24.819 --> 00:11:26.049
to go see one of those games.
00:11:26.429 --> 00:11:28.119
Have you ever been to one of those games?
00:11:29.360 --> 00:11:31.469
After a little while I’d start
00:11:31.470 --> 00:11:32.689
getting private messages.
00:11:33.819 --> 00:11:35.759
You know, it sucks to say, but if they
00:11:35.769 --> 00:11:37.869
had someone in real life that they could
00:11:37.869 --> 00:11:39.949
take advantage of, they wouldn't be here.
00:11:40.389 --> 00:11:41.790
So, these are the ones who are really
00:11:41.790 --> 00:11:43.189
desperate, and when someone is really
00:11:43.190 --> 00:11:45.840
desperate like that, it’s easy to deceive
00:11:45.840 --> 00:11:48.090
them and make them believe whatever
00:11:48.090 --> 00:11:49.459
it is they already want to believe.
00:11:52.250 --> 00:11:53.100
JACK: I’m gonna take the devil’s
00:11:53.100 --> 00:11:54.230
advocate here for a second.
00:11:54.230 --> 00:11:56.610
But how do you know these guys
00:11:56.610 --> 00:11:57.890
were pedos and wanted sex?
00:11:57.890 --> 00:11:59.490
Did they explicitly ask about it?
00:11:59.490 --> 00:12:01.569
Because if you're just talking about
00:12:01.920 --> 00:12:04.529
wanting a father figure and — maybe
00:12:04.530 --> 00:12:05.559
some guy’s like, oh, you know what?
00:12:05.559 --> 00:12:06.770
I’ll help this kid.
00:12:06.770 --> 00:12:08.410
They just — they might not have any
00:12:08.410 --> 00:12:09.979
intentions to do evil shit, you know?
00:12:10.980 --> 00:12:11.790
ZACHARIAH: Oh, it’s obvious.
00:12:11.920 --> 00:12:12.900
The whole site is just
00:12:13.430 --> 00:12:14.809
child porn and sick shit.
00:12:15.579 --> 00:12:16.619
It’s all people talk about.
00:12:17.769 --> 00:12:18.970
You wouldn't accidentally end up
00:12:18.970 --> 00:12:21.890
here and think that you're just
00:12:21.890 --> 00:12:23.579
chatting with someone randomly.
00:12:23.769 --> 00:12:26.160
You go here for that specific reason.
00:12:27.110 --> 00:12:28.010
JACK: Okay, so you said some
00:12:28.020 --> 00:12:29.769
people were private-messaging you.
00:12:30.469 --> 00:12:31.249
ZACHARIAH: I was really just
00:12:31.869 --> 00:12:32.679
making them feel that they
00:12:32.680 --> 00:12:33.770
were part of my life, you know?
00:12:34.649 --> 00:12:35.410
I was just using their
00:12:35.410 --> 00:12:36.690
blindness for my gain.
00:12:37.660 --> 00:12:38.809
So, guys were talking to me on
00:12:38.809 --> 00:12:40.930
there, acting friendly and shit.
00:12:41.590 --> 00:12:42.789
One day I say to this guy,
00:12:43.340 --> 00:12:44.490
I really want to meet you.
00:12:44.919 --> 00:12:46.480
Are there any cool parks by you?
00:12:46.989 --> 00:12:49.020
He was responding, but he
00:12:49.020 --> 00:12:50.069
wasn't quite ready to meet.
00:12:51.000 --> 00:12:52.349
So, then a few days later I said,
00:12:52.959 --> 00:12:54.599
my dad just beat the shit out of me
00:12:54.599 --> 00:12:56.869
today and I really want to run away.
00:12:58.229 --> 00:13:01.389
These pedophiles, they really want sex.
00:13:01.470 --> 00:13:02.269
That’s all they want.
00:13:04.119 --> 00:13:05.279
They don't feel bad about
00:13:05.279 --> 00:13:06.450
getting it from little boys.
00:13:07.559 --> 00:13:09.639
So, he was interested and offered to meet.
00:13:11.949 --> 00:13:12.459
JACK: Okay.
00:13:12.949 --> 00:13:15.690
So, did you meet up with this guy?
00:13:17.100 --> 00:13:19.149
ZACHARIAH: [Music] Yep, I sure did.
00:13:21.169 --> 00:13:22.209
JACK: God, you're crazy.
00:13:26.059 --> 00:13:26.439
ZACHARIAH: I brought
00:13:26.439 --> 00:13:27.579
two other guys with me.
00:13:27.809 --> 00:13:29.040
We pull up to his house.
00:13:29.189 --> 00:13:30.459
We park a few doors down
00:13:30.459 --> 00:13:31.279
so we're not obvious.
00:13:31.869 --> 00:13:32.969
I told them to wait in the car,
00:13:33.099 --> 00:13:35.020
because he’s expecting just me.
00:13:35.540 --> 00:13:37.069
But as soon as I go in, you
00:13:37.069 --> 00:13:38.550
come in right after me, too.
00:13:39.269 --> 00:13:40.879
So, I go and I grab a bat from the car,
00:13:41.089 --> 00:13:43.220
and I’m holding it behind my back so that
00:13:43.220 --> 00:13:44.899
he can't see it as I walk up to the door.
00:13:46.089 --> 00:13:47.889
I knock on the door, and I see
00:13:47.889 --> 00:13:48.709
him look through the window.
00:13:48.839 --> 00:13:50.180
I say, I’m here, I’m here.
00:13:50.610 --> 00:13:51.969
He opens the door, and yeah, it
00:13:52.469 --> 00:13:54.099
was him, the same guy who was
00:13:54.099 --> 00:13:56.059
sending me photos online, some
00:13:56.059 --> 00:13:57.769
old white dude in his fifties.
00:13:58.439 --> 00:14:01.449
He said, hey, it’s nice to meet you.
00:14:01.479 --> 00:14:02.949
He opened the door and let me in.
00:14:04.209 --> 00:14:05.890
I looked around him, and he had condoms
00:14:05.890 --> 00:14:08.330
on the table and a bunch of alcohol.
00:14:08.839 --> 00:14:10.670
He was only wearing underwear.
00:14:11.569 --> 00:14:13.619
At that point I knew without a
00:14:13.619 --> 00:14:16.459
doubt this guy was expecting to
00:14:16.459 --> 00:14:18.369
rape a thirteen-year-old boy.
00:14:19.500 --> 00:14:21.089
He was smiling at me.
00:14:22.739 --> 00:14:24.269
I felt my body tense up.
00:14:24.929 --> 00:14:27.519
I felt a primal feeling.
00:14:28.209 --> 00:14:30.299
I thought through the whole scenario in my
00:14:30.300 --> 00:14:32.319
head what it would be like if I was just
00:14:32.319 --> 00:14:34.099
an innocent thirteen-year-old boy who came
00:14:34.099 --> 00:14:36.059
over and what it would be like to be raped
00:14:36.199 --> 00:14:38.449
by this old fucker, and all that pain that
00:14:38.449 --> 00:14:40.259
it would cause me for the rest of my life.
00:14:40.610 --> 00:14:42.549
I experienced all that fucking
00:14:42.550 --> 00:14:44.939
pain in a moment’s time.
00:14:46.199 --> 00:14:48.369
Suddenly it felt like my whole
00:14:48.399 --> 00:14:49.969
fucking life was on the line.
00:14:50.919 --> 00:14:52.199
That’s the primal feeling I
00:14:52.210 --> 00:14:54.310
had, to survive at any cost.
00:14:54.310 --> 00:14:56.180
Here I am in this situation where this
00:14:56.180 --> 00:14:58.350
guy is going to take big fucking advantage
00:14:58.350 --> 00:15:00.600
of me, and I can do something about it.
00:15:00.760 --> 00:15:03.360
I can fight back, and I am fucking ready.
00:15:04.790 --> 00:15:05.869
My eyes widened.
00:15:06.389 --> 00:15:07.670
I took a breath, and
00:15:07.670 --> 00:15:09.720
I said out loud, okay.
00:15:10.650 --> 00:15:11.900
He went to shut the door.
00:15:12.359 --> 00:15:14.689
I pulled the bat out from behind me and
00:15:14.689 --> 00:15:16.480
I waited for him to turn back around,
00:15:16.480 --> 00:15:18.979
and he still had that smile on his face.
00:15:19.929 --> 00:15:20.900
I smacked him right in
00:15:20.900 --> 00:15:21.649
the face with the bat.
00:15:21.649 --> 00:15:24.300
He bent over in pain, and I
00:15:24.300 --> 00:15:25.549
pushed him down with my foot.
00:15:26.110 --> 00:15:27.619
He was holding his face, screaming.
00:15:27.820 --> 00:15:29.260
His whole body was twitching
00:15:29.260 --> 00:15:30.379
and squirming rapidly.
00:15:30.579 --> 00:15:33.219
He instantly knew he fucked up,
00:15:33.219 --> 00:15:35.480
and this is all his own doing.
00:15:36.629 --> 00:15:37.970
The other two guys come bursting
00:15:37.970 --> 00:15:39.199
through the door, ready to fight.
00:15:39.649 --> 00:15:41.219
They see me standing over this fucker,
00:15:41.219 --> 00:15:43.069
and they just freeze and look at me.
00:15:43.289 --> 00:15:45.159
One of them said, what the fuck?
00:15:45.169 --> 00:15:47.709
I told them, go fuck this place up.
00:15:48.649 --> 00:15:50.439
They just started smashing everything.
00:15:50.889 --> 00:15:52.459
The old guy started trying to say
00:15:52.459 --> 00:15:54.040
something, but he was scared shitless,
00:15:54.299 --> 00:15:55.909
so he was just stuttering and mumbling.
00:15:56.150 --> 00:15:57.899
I bent down and I said, oh yeah?
00:15:58.080 --> 00:15:58.980
Oh, really?
00:15:59.439 --> 00:16:00.209
You're sorry?
00:16:00.729 --> 00:16:01.389
Too late, motherfucker.
00:16:01.389 --> 00:16:02.949
I would hit him again with the
00:16:02.949 --> 00:16:04.529
bat, and I just put my foot right
00:16:04.529 --> 00:16:05.809
on his face and held him down.
00:16:06.299 --> 00:16:07.329
I could hear the other two guys
00:16:07.330 --> 00:16:08.719
breaking shit all through the house,
00:16:09.019 --> 00:16:11.329
glass busting, cabinets smashed.
00:16:11.610 --> 00:16:12.749
They smashed the TV,
00:16:12.869 --> 00:16:14.029
they smashed his lamps.
00:16:14.500 --> 00:16:15.739
Every time he tried to say, no,
00:16:15.739 --> 00:16:18.039
stop, or move or something, I
00:16:18.040 --> 00:16:19.229
would just fucking hit him again.
00:16:19.589 --> 00:16:20.939
He was laying there shivering in
00:16:20.939 --> 00:16:22.559
fear, and it was great to watch.
00:16:22.769 --> 00:16:24.279
He was trembling so badly.
00:16:24.470 --> 00:16:25.560
His face was bloody.
00:16:25.560 --> 00:16:26.449
He was crying.
00:16:26.860 --> 00:16:28.089
But I wouldn't let him talk.
00:16:28.119 --> 00:16:29.829
I didn't let him say a fucking word.
00:16:30.029 --> 00:16:30.959
I just hit him every
00:16:30.959 --> 00:16:32.009
time he opened his mouth.
00:16:32.509 --> 00:16:33.989
One of my friends got out a marker
00:16:34.169 --> 00:16:35.829
and wrote ‘pedo’ real big on the
00:16:35.829 --> 00:16:37.424
walls, and they opened up the
00:16:37.424 --> 00:16:38.589
condoms and threw them around.
00:16:38.589 --> 00:16:39.840
I think one of them put the
00:16:39.840 --> 00:16:41.430
fucking TV remote in a condom,
00:16:41.849 --> 00:16:43.359
and then they started taking shit.
00:16:43.369 --> 00:16:44.789
They took his wallet, they took
00:16:44.790 --> 00:16:46.079
all his cash, they took his
00:16:46.079 --> 00:16:47.669
laptop, they took his phone.
00:16:47.979 --> 00:16:48.769
They looked for drugs
00:16:48.769 --> 00:16:49.870
in his medicine cabinet.
00:16:50.319 --> 00:16:51.849
Then I took off the rest of his
00:16:51.849 --> 00:16:53.810
clothes, and I pulled down my
00:16:53.810 --> 00:16:56.280
pants, and I pissed on that fucker’s
00:16:56.309 --> 00:16:57.539
face right in his living room.
00:17:01.519 --> 00:17:02.259
I brought some handcuffs,
00:17:02.919 --> 00:17:03.509
and I handcuffed him.
00:17:03.959 --> 00:17:05.229
We're dragging him into the bathroom.
00:17:05.800 --> 00:17:06.850
We threw him in the bathtub.
00:17:07.529 --> 00:17:09.349
We tied a rope around him and then
00:17:09.360 --> 00:17:11.569
turned on the hot water full blast.
00:17:12.339 --> 00:17:13.380
We smashed up the walls
00:17:13.380 --> 00:17:14.689
on the way out and left.
00:17:15.929 --> 00:17:16.970
We ran to the car with all his
00:17:16.970 --> 00:17:19.089
stuff and sped off, and that was it.
00:17:21.449 --> 00:17:22.259
JACK: Goddamn.
00:17:22.300 --> 00:17:23.429
How does your story just
00:17:23.429 --> 00:17:24.759
keep getting more intense?
00:17:25.220 --> 00:17:26.449
This is insane.
00:17:27.589 --> 00:17:29.079
ZACHARIAH: Yeah, it is insane.
00:17:29.519 --> 00:17:31.349
JACK: So, what did you do with
00:17:31.349 --> 00:17:32.429
all the stuff you stole from him?
00:17:32.429 --> 00:17:33.069
Did you sell it?
00:17:33.330 --> 00:17:34.280
ZACHARIAH: No, we kept it.
00:17:34.569 --> 00:17:35.619
We saved all the shit from
00:17:35.619 --> 00:17:36.889
the laptop and then wiped it.
00:17:37.999 --> 00:17:39.369
JACK: What do you mean saved his shit?
00:17:40.360 --> 00:17:42.019
ZACHARIAH: Well, these pedo forums
00:17:42.019 --> 00:17:44.109
will warn you about users, you know?
00:17:44.139 --> 00:17:46.530
So like, if the forum sees that if two
00:17:46.530 --> 00:17:48.449
people are gonna meet and then they're
00:17:48.450 --> 00:17:50.390
both quiet afterwards, you can guess
00:17:50.400 --> 00:17:53.940
that maybe one guy got arrested or one
00:17:53.940 --> 00:17:55.410
of them was a fed or something like that.
00:17:55.730 --> 00:17:57.470
So, we found his log-in details on
00:17:57.470 --> 00:17:59.120
the forum and we used his username
00:17:59.120 --> 00:18:00.300
and password in order to keep
00:18:00.300 --> 00:18:02.230
him active on this pedo forum.
00:18:02.910 --> 00:18:04.589
We even wrote for him, ‘it was great
00:18:04.590 --> 00:18:06.899
seeing you today’ to make it look like
00:18:06.959 --> 00:18:08.830
I am a real thirteen-year-old boy.
00:18:09.730 --> 00:18:10.510
JACK: Dang, so there’s a
00:18:10.510 --> 00:18:12.060
rating system at this place?
00:18:12.279 --> 00:18:13.820
ZACHARIAH: No, not a rating system.
00:18:13.869 --> 00:18:14.389
It’s more like a
00:18:14.449 --> 00:18:16.269
reputation thing, you know?
00:18:17.320 --> 00:18:19.360
JACK: Well, that whole thing probably
00:18:19.360 --> 00:18:20.960
gave you a sort of high, didn't it?
00:18:22.480 --> 00:18:23.650
ZACHARIAH: I don't know about that.
00:18:24.099 --> 00:18:26.449
It’s not like I do this for fun.
00:18:27.180 --> 00:18:29.519
It’s more like a dark and
00:18:29.840 --> 00:18:31.470
ugly thing that I have to do.
00:18:31.860 --> 00:18:33.689
Like, clearly these monsters are
00:18:33.709 --> 00:18:35.720
out there preying on kids, and if I
00:18:35.739 --> 00:18:37.980
don't stop this guy, who else will?
00:18:38.709 --> 00:18:39.779
Someone needs to do it.
00:18:39.980 --> 00:18:41.330
Why not me, you know?
00:18:41.929 --> 00:18:43.050
But I’m dealing with
00:18:43.309 --> 00:18:44.679
pure fucking evil here.
00:18:44.930 --> 00:18:46.189
This guy was sick, you know?
00:18:46.680 --> 00:18:47.840
The work I have to fucking
00:18:47.840 --> 00:18:48.850
do, it’s a lot of work.
00:18:49.119 --> 00:18:51.119
I have to drive two states away and
00:18:51.119 --> 00:18:52.859
show up to a stranger’s house who’s
00:18:52.860 --> 00:18:54.929
expecting to butt-fuck me, and if I
00:18:54.939 --> 00:18:56.470
fuck up, I might get raped, you know?
00:18:56.790 --> 00:18:58.029
Like, that ain’t easy shit
00:18:58.040 --> 00:18:59.169
to step into, you know?
00:18:59.549 --> 00:19:00.709
The whole time you gotta keep an eye
00:19:00.709 --> 00:19:02.459
out for neighbors or cops or something.
00:19:02.599 --> 00:19:04.020
It’s a lot of fucking work.
00:19:04.639 --> 00:19:05.580
JACK: Two states away?
00:19:05.580 --> 00:19:06.619
You drove that far?
00:19:07.470 --> 00:19:08.020
ZACHARIAH: Yeah.
00:19:08.409 --> 00:19:10.379
We drove six hours to beat
00:19:10.379 --> 00:19:11.479
the shit out of that guy.
00:19:12.290 --> 00:19:15.479
JACK: I’ve heard of people baiting
00:19:15.479 --> 00:19:17.170
pedos online, and then when they get
00:19:17.170 --> 00:19:19.189
enough evidence on them, they try…
00:19:19.259 --> 00:19:20.660
ZACHARIAH: They try to blackmail them?
00:19:21.070 --> 00:19:21.689
JACK: Yeah, yeah.
00:19:21.689 --> 00:19:23.660
They say, give me $500
00:19:23.660 --> 00:19:24.339
or I’m calling the cops.
00:19:24.720 --> 00:19:25.280
ZACHARIAH: $500?
00:19:25.320 --> 00:19:25.839
Fuck that.
00:19:25.860 --> 00:19:27.689
We took everything this guy had,
00:19:28.119 --> 00:19:29.860
including his kitchen set and
00:19:30.070 --> 00:19:31.579
plates and silverware and stuff.
00:19:32.029 --> 00:19:33.129
Shit, the computer I’m talking
00:19:33.129 --> 00:19:34.909
to you on right now is the one
00:19:34.909 --> 00:19:35.960
that we took from that guy.
00:19:37.029 --> 00:19:37.939
It’s a MacBook Air.
00:19:38.989 --> 00:19:40.159
JACK: Dang, that’s a nice one.
00:19:40.209 --> 00:19:42.819
So, is this the one and
00:19:42.820 --> 00:19:43.899
only time you did this?
00:19:44.669 --> 00:19:46.269
ZACHARIAH: Well, I wasn't sure if
00:19:46.269 --> 00:19:47.429
I ever wanted to do that again.
00:19:47.429 --> 00:19:48.259
[Music] Like I said, it’s a lot
00:19:48.259 --> 00:19:50.029
of work and it’s risky as fuck.
00:19:50.799 --> 00:19:52.219
I could have gotten butt-fucked.
00:19:52.489 --> 00:19:55.729
But after people saw that nice reply
00:19:55.729 --> 00:19:58.469
from him, more guys wanted to meet me.
00:19:58.469 --> 00:20:01.849
I was like, fuck, now shit’s getting real.
00:20:03.849 --> 00:20:05.929
Three guys were messaging me now every
00:20:05.929 --> 00:20:08.259
day asking how my day is going and
00:20:08.259 --> 00:20:10.450
showing me video games and other shit.
00:20:10.919 --> 00:20:12.179
One of them sent me a dick pic.
00:20:13.169 --> 00:20:14.760
So, at that point I felt like I had
00:20:14.760 --> 00:20:16.349
a responsibility to do something.
00:20:16.349 --> 00:20:18.310
I know these guys are out there.
00:20:18.310 --> 00:20:19.550
I know these guys are
00:20:19.550 --> 00:20:21.779
going to rape a little boy.
00:20:23.279 --> 00:20:25.510
If you were seeing someone raping a
00:20:25.510 --> 00:20:27.110
little boy, you'd stop them, right?
00:20:27.759 --> 00:20:30.159
So, what’s the difference when you see
00:20:30.160 --> 00:20:32.270
someone who’s trying to get together
00:20:32.270 --> 00:20:33.600
with that little boy to rape him?
00:20:34.679 --> 00:20:36.269
You should want to stop that, too.
00:20:37.729 --> 00:20:39.959
That’s what I felt like I had to do.
00:20:42.220 --> 00:20:43.199
JACK: Fuck, man.
00:20:43.250 --> 00:20:46.720
Okay, so, what happens at the next one?
00:20:48.300 --> 00:20:50.290
ZACHARIAH: This guy was one state over
00:20:50.290 --> 00:20:52.370
this time, and he was willing to meet.
00:20:53.720 --> 00:20:55.229
It was clear he wanted sex.
00:20:55.240 --> 00:20:58.030
It was me and the same two guys again
00:20:58.030 --> 00:21:00.690
that drove like four hours to get there.
00:21:01.259 --> 00:21:02.790
JACK: Tell me about this long-ass drive.
00:21:03.070 --> 00:21:04.279
What are you guys doing on the way?
00:21:04.279 --> 00:21:06.749
Like, are you guys just gripping
00:21:06.789 --> 00:21:08.320
the steering wheel super tight and
00:21:08.320 --> 00:21:09.959
just — eyes are locked on the road,
00:21:09.959 --> 00:21:12.320
quiet as can be, blasting, I don't
00:21:12.320 --> 00:21:13.779
know, Paint It Black on the radio?
00:21:14.869 --> 00:21:15.499
ZACHARIAH: Nah, man.
00:21:15.500 --> 00:21:16.150
It’s chill.
00:21:16.369 --> 00:21:18.739
We listened to rap music, we smoked some
00:21:18.739 --> 00:21:21.709
joints to calm our nerves, and we just
00:21:21.709 --> 00:21:23.230
talked about stupid shit on the way there.
00:21:24.040 --> 00:21:25.510
It’s only the last fifteen minutes
00:21:25.510 --> 00:21:26.860
that we start planning what to do.
00:21:27.860 --> 00:21:29.279
JACK: Okay, so, was it the same plan?
00:21:30.110 --> 00:21:30.330
ZACHARIAH: Yeah.
00:21:30.879 --> 00:21:32.389
I go in first and they
00:21:32.389 --> 00:21:33.149
follow right behind me.
00:21:34.770 --> 00:21:35.179
JACK: Got it.
00:21:36.049 --> 00:21:36.419
Okay.
00:21:37.289 --> 00:21:37.710
Go on.
00:21:38.549 --> 00:21:39.120
ZACHARIAH: I mean, it’s
00:21:39.120 --> 00:21:39.800
really the same thing.
00:21:39.800 --> 00:21:40.459
[Music] I get there, the
00:21:40.459 --> 00:21:43.409
guy opens the door, I go in.
00:21:44.129 --> 00:21:46.309
This time I see a bunch of porn
00:21:46.309 --> 00:21:48.459
magazines all over the place and some
00:21:48.959 --> 00:21:51.609
bags of candy and soda and alcohol.
00:21:52.369 --> 00:21:54.249
The guy looked at me and said,
00:21:54.750 --> 00:21:55.979
so, can I make you a drink?
00:21:56.820 --> 00:21:58.439
He’s all happy to see me and shit.
00:21:58.540 --> 00:22:01.070
I said, I’m not thirsty.
00:22:01.779 --> 00:22:04.910
I pulled out the bat and I fucking
00:22:05.180 --> 00:22:06.389
jammed it into his stomach.
00:22:07.830 --> 00:22:09.610
He bent over and I grabbed his
00:22:09.610 --> 00:22:11.530
hair and pulled him to the ground.
00:22:11.540 --> 00:22:13.329
I said, so you like
00:22:13.330 --> 00:22:14.499
fucking little boys, huh?
00:22:14.669 --> 00:22:16.339
He started yelling back, no, no.
00:22:16.599 --> 00:22:18.789
I swung the bat to hit him, and he thought
00:22:18.790 --> 00:22:20.849
it was just me, so he grabbed the bat
00:22:20.849 --> 00:22:22.869
with his hand and kicked me in the leg.
00:22:23.879 --> 00:22:25.489
Just then, my two friends came in and
00:22:25.489 --> 00:22:27.389
they saw me struggling with him, and
00:22:27.389 --> 00:22:28.889
they just started beating the shit out
00:22:28.889 --> 00:22:30.606
of him, stomping on him and shit, and
00:22:30.606 --> 00:22:32.320
he gave up fighting back after that.
00:22:32.349 --> 00:22:33.849
He just started screaming, no,
00:22:33.849 --> 00:22:36.009
no, no, please, please, no.
00:22:36.479 --> 00:22:38.549
My friends got him under control, and
00:22:38.549 --> 00:22:39.909
I started going through the house.
00:22:40.439 --> 00:22:41.629
The motherfucker had condoms in
00:22:41.629 --> 00:22:43.779
the bedroom and lube ready and
00:22:43.779 --> 00:22:46.099
shit, more porn magazines in there.
00:22:46.469 --> 00:22:47.940
I broke all the mirrors in his bathroom
00:22:47.940 --> 00:22:49.387
and some lights, and I was going
00:22:49.387 --> 00:22:50.859
through his drawers looking for money.
00:22:51.629 --> 00:22:53.779
I didn't find any, but going through his
00:22:53.779 --> 00:22:55.459
shit, I realized this guy lives alone.
00:22:56.009 --> 00:22:57.689
There’s only guy’s clothes here.
00:22:58.410 --> 00:22:59.899
So, I said, fuck it, let’s
00:22:59.899 --> 00:23:00.890
take all his clothes.
00:23:01.169 --> 00:23:02.719
So, I grabbed a trash bag and I threw
00:23:02.800 --> 00:23:05.129
every item of clothing he has in it.
00:23:05.129 --> 00:23:06.049
I even took all the clothes he was
00:23:06.050 --> 00:23:07.419
wearing off and I threw it in there.
00:23:07.699 --> 00:23:09.309
I took the towels, I took the sheets.
00:23:09.309 --> 00:23:10.519
Fuck, I took everything I
00:23:10.550 --> 00:23:12.049
could that I thought he might
00:23:12.050 --> 00:23:13.219
be able to cover himself with.
00:23:13.949 --> 00:23:15.479
I got out a big permanent marker
00:23:15.819 --> 00:23:17.489
and I wrote ‘pedo’ real big on his
00:23:17.489 --> 00:23:19.919
forehead and on all the walls and shit.
00:23:20.539 --> 00:23:23.039
We tied him up and dragged him into the
00:23:23.039 --> 00:23:24.799
bathtub and turned on the hot water.
00:23:25.519 --> 00:23:26.939
He was totally naked in the shower.
00:23:26.989 --> 00:23:29.569
We jammed a chair into the door handle,
00:23:29.569 --> 00:23:31.989
and it kept the bathroom door closed.
00:23:32.559 --> 00:23:34.419
Then we just kept fucking the place up.
00:23:34.440 --> 00:23:36.119
We took his laptop, his
00:23:36.119 --> 00:23:38.099
wallet, his TV that time.
00:23:38.399 --> 00:23:39.500
We took so much shit.
00:23:40.320 --> 00:23:41.049
I think that was the place
00:23:41.050 --> 00:23:42.190
we took the dishwasher from.
00:23:42.929 --> 00:23:42.959
JACK: What?
00:23:42.959 --> 00:23:44.019
A dishwasher?
00:23:44.789 --> 00:23:45.720
ZACHARIAH: ‘Cause the one at our place
00:23:45.720 --> 00:23:47.670
was old and broken, so we needed a new
00:23:47.670 --> 00:23:49.670
one, and why not take this motherfucker’s?
00:23:50.530 --> 00:23:51.340
JACK: Goddamn.
00:23:52.720 --> 00:23:54.050
ZACHARIAH: We took his alcohol, too.
00:23:55.120 --> 00:23:57.499
On the way out I opened up one
00:23:57.500 --> 00:23:59.979
of the condoms and I put it on
00:23:59.980 --> 00:24:01.850
the doorknob of the front door.
00:24:02.629 --> 00:24:03.970
Then we just loaded all our shit
00:24:03.980 --> 00:24:05.209
up in the car and flew outta there.
00:24:06.020 --> 00:24:06.690
JACK: Wait, so, is this
00:24:06.690 --> 00:24:08.360
your signature thing you do?
00:24:08.360 --> 00:24:10.639
Like, you always lock the guy in the
00:24:10.639 --> 00:24:12.830
bathroom and put hot water on him?
00:24:14.160 --> 00:24:15.184
ZACHARIAH: I mean, I don't think about it.
00:24:15.184 --> 00:24:16.490
It just makes sense at the time.
00:24:16.490 --> 00:24:17.569
JACK: What do you mean?
00:24:17.980 --> 00:24:18.550
ZACHARIAH: Like, we don't want
00:24:18.550 --> 00:24:19.589
this guy to simply lick his
00:24:19.590 --> 00:24:21.159
wounds and go back to his life.
00:24:21.160 --> 00:24:23.329
We want to embarrass him and expose
00:24:23.340 --> 00:24:25.449
him to the other people he knows.
00:24:25.950 --> 00:24:27.279
So, if we lock him in the bathroom and he
00:24:27.279 --> 00:24:29.229
can't get out, then he’s gonna have to get
00:24:29.230 --> 00:24:31.130
someone else to help him out, maybe his
00:24:31.130 --> 00:24:34.109
wife, his kids, his neighbor, the police.
00:24:34.669 --> 00:24:36.139
They’ll be like, what
00:24:36.139 --> 00:24:37.549
the fuck happened to you?
00:24:38.259 --> 00:24:40.009
He’ll have a lot of explaining to do.
00:24:40.680 --> 00:24:42.629
This guy had to get help naked,
00:24:43.099 --> 00:24:44.839
which is very fitting, if you ask me.
00:24:45.779 --> 00:24:46.429
JACK: What did you do
00:24:46.430 --> 00:24:47.900
with that guy’s clothes?
00:24:48.459 --> 00:24:49.050
ZACHARIAH: His clothes?
00:24:49.220 --> 00:24:50.610
Oh, yeah, we just threw them
00:24:50.610 --> 00:24:51.689
out the window on the way home.
00:24:51.699 --> 00:24:52.670
We didn't want that shit.
00:24:53.489 --> 00:24:55.439
JACK: Okay, strange question; have
00:24:55.439 --> 00:24:57.229
you ever seen A Clockwork Orange?
00:24:58.409 --> 00:25:01.430
ZACHARIAH: It sounds familiar, but no.
00:25:02.110 --> 00:25:03.349
JACK: I just wonder when you're
00:25:03.349 --> 00:25:05.029
in someone’s house smashing
00:25:05.029 --> 00:25:06.020
shit up, beating the shit out
00:25:06.020 --> 00:25:08.299
of them, are you singing a song?
00:25:09.110 --> 00:25:09.769
ZACHARIAH: A song?
00:25:09.879 --> 00:25:10.259
No.
00:25:10.279 --> 00:25:11.379
Wait, you think I’m
00:25:11.379 --> 00:25:12.289
the Joker or something?
00:25:12.860 --> 00:25:14.050
That sounds creepy as fuck.
00:25:15.000 --> 00:25:16.669
JACK: It is creepy, yes, I know, but
00:25:16.709 --> 00:25:19.144
you were — you're insane and I have
00:25:19.144 --> 00:25:21.050
no idea what you're gonna say next.
00:25:22.119 --> 00:25:22.749
ZACHARIAH: True, true.
00:25:22.970 --> 00:25:24.459
I’ve watched some of these
00:25:24.470 --> 00:25:25.459
pedophile hunters on YouTube.
00:25:27.279 --> 00:25:28.649
You know they’ll meet the person in a
00:25:28.649 --> 00:25:30.340
restaurant to confront them or something,
00:25:30.599 --> 00:25:32.210
and you hear the pedophile start begging,
00:25:32.549 --> 00:25:34.499
please, I have a daughter, I would never
00:25:34.500 --> 00:25:36.340
want to hurt her like that; trust me.
00:25:37.220 --> 00:25:38.159
They’ll deny why they're
00:25:38.159 --> 00:25:39.240
even there and shit.
00:25:39.790 --> 00:25:41.040
Even if this guy goes to jail, the
00:25:41.049 --> 00:25:42.260
only thing that it’s gonna do is
00:25:42.260 --> 00:25:43.499
it’s gonna make him more desperate.
00:25:43.750 --> 00:25:44.679
It’s not like he’s gonna go to
00:25:44.680 --> 00:25:46.799
jail as some gay pedophile and
00:25:46.799 --> 00:25:48.629
then come out a straight guy
00:25:48.669 --> 00:25:50.229
only interested in older women.
00:25:50.729 --> 00:25:52.369
They're still gonna have this sick thought
00:25:52.379 --> 00:25:55.089
in their mind and that sick intent of
00:25:55.089 --> 00:25:57.540
doing something to some little kid.
00:25:58.500 --> 00:25:59.730
So, fuck that, you know?
00:26:01.160 --> 00:26:01.959
JACK: Do you get any
00:26:01.959 --> 00:26:02.969
thrill from this at all?
00:26:05.649 --> 00:26:08.139
ZACHARIAH: I mean, some of
00:26:08.139 --> 00:26:09.999
it is pretty entertaining.
00:26:10.009 --> 00:26:12.900
Like, when you go up to a pedo’s house
00:26:13.059 --> 00:26:14.059
and they think they're gonna have
00:26:14.059 --> 00:26:16.680
sex with you and they're so happy and
00:26:16.680 --> 00:26:19.399
blind to how evil they are, and he’s so
00:26:19.399 --> 00:26:21.070
happy to take advantage of this little
00:26:21.070 --> 00:26:24.719
boy, and then I turn up, and when they
00:26:24.720 --> 00:26:27.530
see my bat, their expression changes.
00:26:27.989 --> 00:26:28.889
Yeah, huh?
00:26:29.019 --> 00:26:30.690
It’s a whole different story now, huh?
00:26:31.050 --> 00:26:33.449
They start making up bullshit, and
00:26:33.449 --> 00:26:34.980
it’s entertaining to watch them
00:26:34.980 --> 00:26:37.569
realize that they fucked up, and
00:26:37.569 --> 00:26:39.519
that’s nobody’s fault but their own.
00:26:39.919 --> 00:26:41.989
This was their decision, their
00:26:42.030 --> 00:26:44.560
choice, and they know they fucked up.
00:26:45.460 --> 00:26:46.610
They might be too sick to even
00:26:46.610 --> 00:26:48.360
understand that, and they think
00:26:48.360 --> 00:26:50.410
they're the victim, but they're not.
00:26:50.440 --> 00:26:51.809
They were going to victimize
00:26:51.840 --> 00:26:53.810
me, and I just showed them
00:26:54.219 --> 00:26:56.129
what it’s like to get fucked.
00:26:56.610 --> 00:26:58.680
JACK: So, did this become your thing
00:26:58.680 --> 00:27:02.300
then, pedo-baiting and then pedo-batting?
00:27:03.309 --> 00:27:04.860
ZACHARIAH: Yeah, me and some of
00:27:04.860 --> 00:27:07.020
my friends did it again and again.
00:27:08.160 --> 00:27:10.219
JACK: Have you ever baited a pedophile
00:27:10.219 --> 00:27:13.019
but then when you went to his house
00:27:13.309 --> 00:27:14.939
there was more than one person there?
00:27:16.149 --> 00:27:17.949
ZACHARIAH: [Music] Oh, yeah, yeah.
00:27:18.660 --> 00:27:20.609
JACK: Okay, what happened there?
00:27:21.919 --> 00:27:23.490
ZACHARIAH: So, after we did this like five
00:27:23.490 --> 00:27:26.809
times, I was starting to feel more loose,
00:27:26.809 --> 00:27:28.910
I guess, like less cautious, let’s say.
00:27:29.379 --> 00:27:30.199
So, it’s just me and
00:27:30.200 --> 00:27:31.469
one other guy that went.
00:27:32.480 --> 00:27:33.579
He was seventeen.
00:27:34.959 --> 00:27:36.209
This was actually two months ago.
00:27:36.809 --> 00:27:40.160
I brought a pocketknife and he
00:27:40.160 --> 00:27:42.810
brought a BB gun, like a pistol one.
00:27:44.079 --> 00:27:46.269
We drove to this guy’s house, and
00:27:46.619 --> 00:27:48.159
there was a van in the driveway,
00:27:48.489 --> 00:27:51.210
like one of those creepy vans.
00:27:51.809 --> 00:27:54.690
So, we park a few doors down, and it’s the
00:27:54.690 --> 00:27:56.730
same plan; I’ll go in first, you come in
00:27:56.730 --> 00:27:58.209
as soon as you see the door start to shut.
00:27:58.869 --> 00:28:01.169
I get out and I walk to the house with
00:28:01.169 --> 00:28:02.830
my pocketknife in my pocket, and I
00:28:02.830 --> 00:28:04.820
get up to the door, and I look through
00:28:04.820 --> 00:28:08.410
the window, and I see four guys.
00:28:09.110 --> 00:28:10.310
They're all like forty-year-old
00:28:10.320 --> 00:28:11.469
white men in this house.
00:28:12.059 --> 00:28:14.699
One guy is holding duct tape.
00:28:15.589 --> 00:28:16.959
Another guy’s getting a chair set
00:28:16.970 --> 00:28:18.869
up in the room, and another guy was
00:28:18.869 --> 00:28:20.750
setting up a camera, and there was
00:28:20.750 --> 00:28:23.000
a laptop with porn playing on it.
00:28:23.220 --> 00:28:24.569
JACK: What the fuck?
00:28:25.769 --> 00:28:28.369
ZACHARIAH: Yeah, these people — fuck
00:28:28.369 --> 00:28:30.019
it, they weren't messing around.
00:28:30.729 --> 00:28:32.829
I’m like, fuck.
00:28:33.720 --> 00:28:35.140
Just standing outside, I
00:28:35.140 --> 00:28:36.449
was already tensing up.
00:28:36.449 --> 00:28:37.679
I knew some shit was coming.
00:28:37.689 --> 00:28:38.609
This wasn't right.
00:28:39.250 --> 00:28:40.989
Suddenly a guy opened the door,
00:28:40.989 --> 00:28:42.469
and he had a black ski mask
00:28:42.469 --> 00:28:44.389
on, and I didn't even hesitate.
00:28:44.389 --> 00:28:45.869
I just took my pocketknife right out,
00:28:45.869 --> 00:28:47.449
and I stabbed him in the fucking leg.
00:28:49.419 --> 00:28:50.669
The other guys saw it and started
00:28:50.669 --> 00:28:52.080
coming after me, so I turned
00:28:52.080 --> 00:28:53.310
around and ran outta there.
00:28:53.440 --> 00:28:54.839
I’m not about to get gang-banged
00:28:54.839 --> 00:28:57.339
by three fucking pedos.
00:28:57.339 --> 00:28:57.494
My friend comes around the corner,
00:28:57.494 --> 00:28:58.849
but I yelled, get the fuck outta here!
00:28:59.139 --> 00:29:00.410
The guys were chasing us, so I
00:29:00.449 --> 00:29:02.179
grabbed my friend’s BB gun and I tried
00:29:02.179 --> 00:29:03.280
shooting them with it while I was
00:29:03.280 --> 00:29:05.299
running, but I fucking missed entirely.
00:29:05.419 --> 00:29:05.829
I was so scared shitless.
00:29:06.569 --> 00:29:07.269
I didn't want to get raped.
00:29:07.269 --> 00:29:09.050
But the BB gun was enough to
00:29:09.059 --> 00:29:10.749
scare them off a little bit from
00:29:10.750 --> 00:29:11.780
chasing us, and we were able to
00:29:11.780 --> 00:29:13.739
get to our car and get outta there.
00:29:15.959 --> 00:29:16.769
JACK: Damn, that’s gotta
00:29:16.769 --> 00:29:18.049
get your adrenaline racing.
00:29:18.809 --> 00:29:19.809
ZACHARIAH: Yeah, it sure did.
00:29:19.879 --> 00:29:21.060
I was shaking after that.
00:29:21.060 --> 00:29:22.259
I could barely think straight.
00:29:22.589 --> 00:29:23.399
I don't think I’ve ever smoked
00:29:23.399 --> 00:29:24.619
so many cigarettes in my life.
00:29:25.019 --> 00:29:25.759
As soon as I was done with
00:29:25.769 --> 00:29:27.259
one, I immediately lit another.
00:29:27.639 --> 00:29:29.460
I had to smoke pot just to calm down.
00:29:29.910 --> 00:29:30.839
But then I couldn't think what
00:29:30.839 --> 00:29:32.220
to do, so I took some Adderall to
00:29:32.220 --> 00:29:33.609
plan out what the next moves were.
00:29:34.769 --> 00:29:35.909
JACK: Oh, my god.
00:29:37.039 --> 00:29:38.559
ZACHARIAH: I was thinking, these
00:29:38.559 --> 00:29:40.259
guys have clearly done this before.
00:29:40.670 --> 00:29:41.750
They were prepared and they
00:29:41.750 --> 00:29:42.720
knew what they were doing.
00:29:43.420 --> 00:29:45.270
How many kids have they done this to?
00:29:45.870 --> 00:29:47.430
This shit’s got to stop.
00:29:48.000 --> 00:29:51.149
Clearly no one else can stop them, so
00:29:51.150 --> 00:29:53.540
I better do it, and I better do it now.
00:29:53.540 --> 00:29:55.520
[Music] So, I called up more guys to come
00:29:55.520 --> 00:29:57.290
out, and we waited for them to show up.
00:29:57.650 --> 00:29:59.609
Four more guys came with us, so
00:29:59.609 --> 00:30:01.110
there were six of us, and we had
00:30:01.119 --> 00:30:03.089
bats and knives and BB guns and shit.
00:30:03.509 --> 00:30:05.270
Now it’s like 4:00 a.m., and
00:30:05.279 --> 00:30:06.769
we all drive back over there.
00:30:07.400 --> 00:30:09.609
We turn onto their street, and all
00:30:09.609 --> 00:30:11.309
four of those guys are in the driveway
00:30:11.410 --> 00:30:12.910
loading up their van with shit.
00:30:13.389 --> 00:30:15.149
As soon as we saw them, we sped right
00:30:15.160 --> 00:30:17.000
up to them and we all jumped out and
00:30:17.000 --> 00:30:19.109
started beating the shit out of them.
00:30:19.200 --> 00:30:20.149
They weren't prepared.
00:30:20.329 --> 00:30:21.410
They didn't have any weapons.
00:30:21.559 --> 00:30:22.349
They were tired.
00:30:22.520 --> 00:30:23.740
That one guy that I stabbed with a
00:30:23.740 --> 00:30:25.530
knife, well, his leg was already fucked
00:30:25.530 --> 00:30:26.809
up, so he couldn't move very well.
00:30:26.809 --> 00:30:27.959
He was the first to go down.
00:30:28.349 --> 00:30:29.650
The other guys tried to fight us,
00:30:29.650 --> 00:30:31.389
but with five of us with bats and
00:30:31.389 --> 00:30:32.949
knives and BB guns against three
00:30:32.949 --> 00:30:34.729
of them with no weapons, we beat
00:30:34.730 --> 00:30:36.170
the shit out of them pretty easy.
00:30:36.419 --> 00:30:37.290
It was vicious.
00:30:37.430 --> 00:30:39.390
Everyone was on edge so much and we
00:30:39.390 --> 00:30:40.830
were just racing with adrenaline.
00:30:41.149 --> 00:30:42.219
We were hitting these guys
00:30:42.230 --> 00:30:44.889
really hard; kicks to the face,
00:30:45.099 --> 00:30:46.539
bats to the head and knees.
00:30:47.019 --> 00:30:47.899
It was bloody.
00:30:48.470 --> 00:30:50.179
Two guys got knocked out cold.
00:30:51.500 --> 00:30:52.660
After we fucked them up real
00:30:52.660 --> 00:30:53.739
bad, we dragged them into the
00:30:53.739 --> 00:30:55.220
house and we looked around.
00:30:56.059 --> 00:30:57.240
The house was fucking weird.
00:30:57.240 --> 00:30:58.649
It was like an empty house.
00:30:58.650 --> 00:30:59.440
No one lived there.
00:30:59.440 --> 00:31:01.029
There was only one chair
00:31:01.029 --> 00:31:01.909
in the middle of the room.
00:31:02.290 --> 00:31:03.199
We looked around.
00:31:03.430 --> 00:31:05.029
There was no pictures on the walls.
00:31:05.059 --> 00:31:05.839
There were no personal
00:31:05.839 --> 00:31:06.819
items in the whole place.
00:31:07.189 --> 00:31:08.299
We checked their pockets.
00:31:08.419 --> 00:31:09.369
Nobody had anything in their
00:31:09.369 --> 00:31:11.399
pockets except the keys to the van.
00:31:12.299 --> 00:31:13.130
So, we just left them there
00:31:13.360 --> 00:31:14.990
and closed the door and left.
00:31:15.639 --> 00:31:16.599
Since we had the keys to the
00:31:16.599 --> 00:31:19.219
van, I hopped in it and took it.
00:31:19.790 --> 00:31:20.719
We took their van.
00:31:22.599 --> 00:31:24.739
JACK: How badly injured were those guys?
00:31:27.039 --> 00:31:28.760
ZACHARIAH: Honestly, I don't
00:31:28.760 --> 00:31:30.189
even know if they're still alive.
00:31:30.709 --> 00:31:32.110
I don't think I fucking killed
00:31:32.110 --> 00:31:33.799
any of them, but we beat the
00:31:33.799 --> 00:31:35.139
shit out of them so bad that I
00:31:35.139 --> 00:31:37.590
wouldn't be surprised if one died.
00:31:38.860 --> 00:31:40.729
JACK: So brutal, man.
00:31:41.439 --> 00:31:42.339
ZACHARIAH: Fuck those guys.
00:31:42.339 --> 00:31:43.709
They were gonna forcefully rape a
00:31:43.709 --> 00:31:45.409
fourteen-year-old boy and film it.
00:31:45.409 --> 00:31:46.649
That is fucked up.
00:31:46.919 --> 00:31:48.139
They were watching porn when
00:31:48.139 --> 00:31:48.819
I looked through the window.
00:31:48.819 --> 00:31:49.740
They were gonna duct-tape
00:31:49.740 --> 00:31:51.269
some kid down and jerk off to
00:31:51.270 --> 00:31:52.299
him while he’s getting raped.
00:31:53.129 --> 00:31:54.499
JACK: Did you take their wallets?
00:31:54.789 --> 00:31:55.719
ZACHARIAH: They didn't have any.
00:31:55.720 --> 00:31:56.699
We checked all of them.
00:31:56.879 --> 00:31:58.830
We always take the guy’s wallet so that
00:31:58.830 --> 00:32:00.869
we can have leverage on him, you know?
00:32:00.869 --> 00:32:03.239
Like, he knows that we know who
00:32:03.239 --> 00:32:05.179
he is, and we sometimes look up
00:32:05.179 --> 00:32:06.549
more about what he does and shit.
00:32:06.830 --> 00:32:07.999
But these guys didn't have
00:32:08.000 --> 00:32:09.310
any ID on them or anything.
00:32:09.889 --> 00:32:11.360
So, we took pictures of them and
00:32:11.360 --> 00:32:13.159
we put their faces on forums to see
00:32:13.160 --> 00:32:14.269
if anyone could tell us who these
00:32:14.269 --> 00:32:16.439
guys were, but no one knew them.
00:32:16.869 --> 00:32:18.330
JACK: What was in the van?
00:32:18.860 --> 00:32:20.809
ZACHARIAH: They had cameras, computers,
00:32:20.819 --> 00:32:24.460
duct tape, ropes, tripods, condoms.
00:32:26.169 --> 00:32:27.529
They had a professional camera, too.
00:32:27.529 --> 00:32:28.880
It was like, worth $2,000.
00:32:28.929 --> 00:32:29.619
I still have it.
00:32:30.220 --> 00:32:31.100
They had surveillance
00:32:31.100 --> 00:32:32.460
equipment like mics and shit.
00:32:33.139 --> 00:32:34.759
JACK: Was anything on the cameras?
00:32:35.489 --> 00:32:36.419
ZACHARIAH: No, it was blank.
00:32:36.429 --> 00:32:39.620
They had a 64-gigabyte SD card
00:32:39.680 --> 00:32:40.880
and there was nothing on it.
00:32:41.570 --> 00:32:42.879
The laptops were blank, too,
00:32:42.930 --> 00:32:44.610
not logged into any site or
00:32:44.610 --> 00:32:46.060
had any data on it at all.
00:32:46.570 --> 00:32:47.730
These guys were some kind of
00:32:48.280 --> 00:32:49.810
professional fucking pedophiles.
00:32:49.969 --> 00:32:51.260
I’ve never seen anyone plan this
00:32:51.260 --> 00:32:52.419
shit out as much as they did.
00:32:52.910 --> 00:32:54.089
It was fucking sick.
00:32:55.209 --> 00:32:56.460
JACK: What did you do with the van?
00:32:57.330 --> 00:32:58.349
ZACHARIAH: I dumped it in the water.
00:32:59.689 --> 00:33:01.809
JACK: What, you drove it
00:33:01.809 --> 00:33:02.940
into a lake or something?
00:33:03.709 --> 00:33:04.240
ZACHARIAH: A river.
00:33:04.250 --> 00:33:06.739
JACK: I mean, fuck me.
00:33:07.090 --> 00:33:08.259
It’s worth money.
00:33:08.269 --> 00:33:10.239
You just drove it right into a river?
00:33:10.869 --> 00:33:11.149
ZACHARIAH: Yep.
00:33:12.660 --> 00:33:14.129
JACK: You could have sold it for drugs.
00:33:14.980 --> 00:33:15.770
ZACHARIAH: I didn't want some shit
00:33:15.779 --> 00:33:17.279
with semen stains on it and shit.
00:33:17.279 --> 00:33:18.939
I was still stressed out from
00:33:18.939 --> 00:33:19.710
looking through that window
00:33:19.710 --> 00:33:21.010
and seeing four guys there.
00:33:21.270 --> 00:33:22.569
I didn't want to deal with that shit.
00:33:23.629 --> 00:33:23.949
JACK: Goddamn.
00:33:25.649 --> 00:33:26.769
ZACHARIAH: We came back to that house two
00:33:26.770 --> 00:33:28.410
days later and it was completely empty.
00:33:28.520 --> 00:33:29.870
Nothing at all was there,
00:33:29.870 --> 00:33:31.069
as if it never happened.
00:33:31.869 --> 00:33:34.499
JACK: How many times have you done this,
00:33:34.509 --> 00:33:36.400
like baited a pedophile online and then
00:33:36.410 --> 00:33:38.370
went to their house and beat them up?
00:33:39.379 --> 00:33:39.849
ZACHARIAH: I don't know.
00:33:39.859 --> 00:33:40.649
I don't keep count.
00:33:41.889 --> 00:33:44.059
Twelve, eleven, thirteen,
00:33:44.059 --> 00:33:44.740
something like that.
00:33:45.189 --> 00:33:46.650
JACK: And you keep all the data
00:33:46.689 --> 00:33:48.069
from all the computers you take.
00:33:48.809 --> 00:33:49.700
ZACHARIAH: Yeah, I put it all on
00:33:49.700 --> 00:33:50.999
a hard drive before wiping it.
00:33:51.959 --> 00:33:53.889
You know, if I ever get caught, I’d be
00:33:53.889 --> 00:33:55.230
in big fucking trouble because I have
00:33:55.230 --> 00:33:56.969
evidence of like, fifteen crimes on here.
00:33:59.059 --> 00:34:00.120
JACK: Did the cop — did you ever
00:34:00.139 --> 00:34:02.039
have the cops come after you or a
00:34:02.040 --> 00:34:03.479
run-in with the cops or anything
00:34:03.489 --> 00:34:05.169
related with them in all this?
00:34:05.580 --> 00:34:06.359
ZACHARIAH: No, no.
00:34:06.589 --> 00:34:09.039
I figure the people who did this, they
00:34:09.040 --> 00:34:10.809
knew we have their wallet and computer and
00:34:10.809 --> 00:34:12.360
shit and we have evidence of them being
00:34:12.360 --> 00:34:14.739
pedos, and they don't want that attention.
00:34:15.079 --> 00:34:15.990
So, I don't think any of them
00:34:15.990 --> 00:34:17.169
ever filed police reports.
00:34:17.949 --> 00:34:18.900
JACK: Have you ever told
00:34:18.989 --> 00:34:20.810
anyone all this before?
00:34:21.619 --> 00:34:22.539
ZACHARIAH: No, never.
00:34:23.119 --> 00:34:24.189
The only people who know about this
00:34:24.189 --> 00:34:25.409
are the guys who go with me, and
00:34:25.649 --> 00:34:26.929
even they don't know the whole story.
00:34:27.439 --> 00:34:29.059
JACK: It must feel weird keeping
00:34:29.059 --> 00:34:31.009
such big secrets from the world.
00:34:32.110 --> 00:34:33.919
ZACHARIAH: Yeah, you know, what’s fucking
00:34:33.919 --> 00:34:35.769
weird is I forget my name sometimes.
00:34:36.070 --> 00:34:37.299
I’ve been going by fake names for
00:34:37.299 --> 00:34:39.549
so long I can barely remember the
00:34:39.549 --> 00:34:40.790
name I was born with, you know?
00:34:41.169 --> 00:34:42.759
If you called me that, I would just ignore
00:34:42.759 --> 00:34:44.269
you, not thinking you're talking about me.
00:34:45.369 --> 00:34:47.580
JACK: So, if you've never told anyone
00:34:47.709 --> 00:34:51.310
this story, why are you telling me now?
00:34:52.000 --> 00:34:52.959
ZACHARIAH: Hm, my friend
00:34:52.959 --> 00:34:53.933
told me about your show and I
00:34:53.933 --> 00:34:55.010
listened to it, and I liked it.
00:34:55.129 --> 00:34:56.060
I liked how it was edited.
00:34:56.260 --> 00:34:57.579
I like the way you tell stories.
00:34:57.919 --> 00:34:59.499
I don't know, it’s different.
00:34:59.589 --> 00:35:01.150
It’s not like anything I’ve ever
00:35:01.150 --> 00:35:02.890
heard before, and you really seem
00:35:02.890 --> 00:35:05.349
to care and listen to your guests.
00:35:05.369 --> 00:35:06.069
I can't explain.
00:35:06.869 --> 00:35:07.899
JACK: Okay, but I mean,
00:35:08.259 --> 00:35:09.449
you've never told anyone.
00:35:10.019 --> 00:35:10.949
Now you are.
00:35:11.989 --> 00:35:14.160
ZACHARIAH: Huh, well, I don't
00:35:14.160 --> 00:35:15.439
think I’m gonna live much longer.
00:35:16.610 --> 00:35:17.319
JACK: What do you mean?
00:35:18.379 --> 00:35:20.239
ZACHARIAH: It’s just the life that
00:35:20.239 --> 00:35:23.070
I’m living is dangerous in general.
00:35:23.399 --> 00:35:25.089
The risks are so high what I do,
00:35:25.089 --> 00:35:27.769
and I’m either gonna die soon or
00:35:27.769 --> 00:35:29.809
get arrested or go to jail forever.
00:35:30.419 --> 00:35:31.720
I don't know, it’s just fucked up.
00:35:31.800 --> 00:35:32.779
It’s super fucked up.
00:35:32.819 --> 00:35:34.710
I feel like while I’m still alive
00:35:34.739 --> 00:35:36.640
and able, I can tell my story.
00:35:37.250 --> 00:35:38.850
People might not believe it, and
00:35:38.850 --> 00:35:40.270
this is all bullshit, but ever
00:35:40.270 --> 00:35:41.330
since I started telling you all
00:35:41.330 --> 00:35:43.550
this, I’ve never felt so relaxed.
00:35:43.810 --> 00:35:45.020
I’m sleeping better than ever
00:35:45.020 --> 00:35:47.170
knowing that I told someone all this.
00:35:47.170 --> 00:35:48.480
It’s like a big sigh of
00:35:48.480 --> 00:35:50.090
relief to say it all out loud.
00:35:51.820 --> 00:35:53.550
‘Cause I kinda feel trapped in all this.
00:35:53.740 --> 00:35:55.649
I can't ever tell anyone what
00:35:55.650 --> 00:35:57.759
my life has been like, and that
00:35:57.760 --> 00:35:59.480
means nobody understands me.
00:36:00.590 --> 00:36:02.150
Now that I’ve told you my story, I feel
00:36:02.150 --> 00:36:05.339
like, I don't know, complete in some way.
00:36:06.250 --> 00:36:07.980
Now that you have the story, I can die
00:36:07.980 --> 00:36:10.229
without worrying about it, because I
00:36:10.230 --> 00:36:12.410
probably will die soon, or a pedo’s gonna
00:36:12.419 --> 00:36:14.219
gang-bang me or fuck me up or something.
00:36:14.750 --> 00:36:17.069
I think the saddest thing would be if I
00:36:17.079 --> 00:36:19.670
die and nobody knows what I’ve ever done,
00:36:20.480 --> 00:36:22.690
and I’m just some unidentified body that
00:36:23.000 --> 00:36:24.439
takes his story to his grave, you know?
00:36:25.119 --> 00:36:27.039
I’ve done some stupid shit in the past,
00:36:27.039 --> 00:36:29.549
and it’s probably stupid for me to tell
00:36:29.549 --> 00:36:31.699
you all this, but I don't care anymore.
00:36:33.590 --> 00:36:34.579
JACK: What about going
00:36:34.579 --> 00:36:35.579
back home to see your mom?
00:36:36.289 --> 00:36:37.109
ZACHARIAH: She thinks I’m dead.
00:36:37.119 --> 00:36:38.759
There was a missing child case
00:36:38.759 --> 00:36:40.479
opened, but since they couldn't
00:36:40.519 --> 00:36:41.420
find me, they closed it.
00:36:41.449 --> 00:36:43.209
It’s been eight years since I left, so
00:36:43.739 --> 00:36:45.319
I’m certain she thinks I’m dead now.
00:36:45.519 --> 00:36:46.249
What’s the point?
00:36:46.369 --> 00:36:47.409
I don't see anything good
00:36:47.669 --> 00:36:48.690
waiting for me in Russia.
00:36:48.900 --> 00:36:50.749
If I go back there, they’ll just
00:36:50.750 --> 00:36:52.080
immediately put me in the military,
00:36:52.080 --> 00:36:53.419
and I don't want to do that shit.
00:36:54.409 --> 00:36:57.069
JACK: Can’t you just move to some farm
00:36:57.070 --> 00:36:59.659
or something and get your own cows and
00:36:59.919 --> 00:37:01.539
just live a peaceful, relaxing life?
00:37:02.949 --> 00:37:03.959
ZACHARIAH: And what, be
00:37:04.089 --> 00:37:05.269
bored as shit out there?
00:37:05.869 --> 00:37:06.520
JACK: No, I mean, you'd
00:37:06.520 --> 00:37:07.560
be alive out there.
00:37:08.320 --> 00:37:09.639
I mean, at least you wouldn't be dead.
00:37:11.159 --> 00:37:12.929
ZACHARIAH: No, dude, that’s the problem.
00:37:13.019 --> 00:37:14.479
There are too many people who
00:37:14.479 --> 00:37:15.959
try to play it safe in life.
00:37:16.299 --> 00:37:18.119
Better to be alive than dead, right?
00:37:18.720 --> 00:37:19.539
But fucking playing it
00:37:19.540 --> 00:37:21.189
safe, that’s not living.
00:37:21.479 --> 00:37:22.389
They aren't alive.
00:37:22.839 --> 00:37:24.429
They got seduced by the
00:37:24.439 --> 00:37:25.990
system to just surrender.
00:37:26.449 --> 00:37:27.980
They're choosing a predictable life
00:37:27.980 --> 00:37:29.819
instead of an extraordinary one.
00:37:30.449 --> 00:37:31.469
They're choosing comfort
00:37:31.479 --> 00:37:32.859
instead of fulfillment.
00:37:33.719 --> 00:37:34.720
They just want to go along with
00:37:34.720 --> 00:37:38.059
others to fit in, and I don't fit in.
00:37:38.239 --> 00:37:39.559
I can't fit in.
00:37:41.029 --> 00:37:42.210
JACK: Do you ever think back on it
00:37:42.210 --> 00:37:44.559
all and — like all the choices you've
00:37:44.559 --> 00:37:50.080
made and just wonder if you had made
00:37:50.270 --> 00:37:52.830
a different choice somewhere then
00:37:52.959 --> 00:37:54.619
you'd have a way better life now?
00:37:54.899 --> 00:37:56.719
Like, maybe you didn't break
00:37:56.720 --> 00:37:58.079
the teacher’s ankle or get in
00:37:58.080 --> 00:37:59.339
fights at school or something.
00:37:59.879 --> 00:38:00.819
ZACHARIAH: Or, what about if I
00:38:00.819 --> 00:38:02.150
didn't fight back when my mom’s
00:38:02.150 --> 00:38:03.569
boyfriend tried to rape me?
00:38:03.770 --> 00:38:05.409
How much more fucked up would I be then?
00:38:06.319 --> 00:38:07.789
JACK: No, you know what I mean.
00:38:07.789 --> 00:38:08.960
Like, do you ever think about a
00:38:08.960 --> 00:38:10.749
decision that you made that you
00:38:10.750 --> 00:38:12.909
wish you did something else instead?
00:38:14.119 --> 00:38:15.189
ZACHARIAH: I can't think about that.
00:38:15.419 --> 00:38:17.310
I mean, I do sometimes.
00:38:17.310 --> 00:38:18.999
I wish I still lived at home with my mom.
00:38:19.059 --> 00:38:20.759
My life was great as a kid
00:38:20.860 --> 00:38:21.760
living in her apartment.
00:38:21.789 --> 00:38:24.449
I had friends, food, someone to
00:38:24.449 --> 00:38:25.829
take care of me when I was sick.
00:38:26.369 --> 00:38:28.029
I remember dreaming as a kid what
00:38:28.029 --> 00:38:29.449
life would be like all grown up.
00:38:30.080 --> 00:38:31.689
I had high hopes for my future.
00:38:32.729 --> 00:38:33.659
But at the time I didn't
00:38:33.669 --> 00:38:36.049
realize how great things were.
00:38:36.620 --> 00:38:38.860
At the time I thought my town was shit.
00:38:39.240 --> 00:38:40.310
I thought my school was shit.
00:38:40.320 --> 00:38:42.010
I thought my life was shit.
00:38:42.670 --> 00:38:44.440
But it only got worse from there,
00:38:44.849 --> 00:38:46.830
and I wish I could have it back.
00:38:48.340 --> 00:38:50.080
But life’s changed too much now.
00:38:50.680 --> 00:38:52.689
There’s no way to go back to that.
00:38:53.639 --> 00:38:54.589
The boy is gone.
00:38:56.080 --> 00:38:57.780
If I made a bad choice in the past,
00:38:58.469 --> 00:39:00.770
that’s still my choice I made, and I
00:39:00.770 --> 00:39:02.359
have to live with that consequence.
00:39:03.699 --> 00:39:05.640
JACK: What about leaving America
00:39:05.640 --> 00:39:07.290
altogether and just going somewhere
00:39:07.419 --> 00:39:09.029
nice that you'd rather be?
00:39:09.040 --> 00:39:11.190
Like, I don't know, have you just
00:39:11.190 --> 00:39:12.360
ever thought about getting out?
00:39:13.840 --> 00:39:14.970
ZACHARIAH: That’s hard, too.
00:39:14.989 --> 00:39:17.890
That’s a trap set up by society
00:39:17.890 --> 00:39:20.349
where — we're nesting creatures.
00:39:20.389 --> 00:39:22.370
We like settling down into a routine,
00:39:22.860 --> 00:39:25.089
into comfort, into predictability.
00:39:25.099 --> 00:39:27.030
So, we get a house, we get a
00:39:27.030 --> 00:39:29.819
job, and those things are traps.
00:39:29.889 --> 00:39:31.229
We trap ourselves.
00:39:31.619 --> 00:39:33.869
We then feel stuck, like chained to
00:39:33.869 --> 00:39:36.020
the house, addicted to that paycheck.
00:39:36.329 --> 00:39:39.149
We feel stuck, and I feel stuck currently.
00:39:39.150 --> 00:39:40.600
I’ve built habits.
00:39:40.629 --> 00:39:42.579
I feel stuck doing certain things
00:39:42.580 --> 00:39:44.550
again and again, and it feels really
00:39:44.550 --> 00:39:46.509
hard to break all that, to leave
00:39:46.510 --> 00:39:48.960
this house, to leave my ambitions,
00:39:48.960 --> 00:39:51.149
to break my habits, and to go
00:39:51.150 --> 00:39:52.779
start something new somewhere else.
00:39:53.309 --> 00:39:55.789
Life is weird like that, where it feels
00:39:55.790 --> 00:39:57.530
like we have the ability to choose to do
00:39:57.530 --> 00:40:00.249
anything we want, but at the same time,
00:40:00.830 --> 00:40:02.839
we feel like we have no choice at all.
00:40:03.759 --> 00:40:05.369
Right now I don't feel like
00:40:05.369 --> 00:40:07.730
I have many options, and I
00:40:07.730 --> 00:40:09.399
recognize that it’s my own doing.
00:40:11.400 --> 00:40:13.269
You know, the way the world is connected
00:40:13.290 --> 00:40:14.979
now, like these online connections
00:40:14.979 --> 00:40:16.850
we all have, you think you're
00:40:16.879 --> 00:40:19.499
connected, but the opposite is true.
00:40:19.519 --> 00:40:21.469
The more online you are, the
00:40:21.470 --> 00:40:23.059
more disconnected you become.
00:40:23.599 --> 00:40:25.789
You lose your sense of humanity.
00:40:25.799 --> 00:40:27.419
You lose your sense of community.
00:40:27.699 --> 00:40:29.759
You feel more lonely and isolated.
00:40:30.110 --> 00:40:31.739
Just look at how everyone online is
00:40:31.739 --> 00:40:33.439
constantly fighting with each other.
00:40:33.639 --> 00:40:34.979
You know that if two people were in the
00:40:34.979 --> 00:40:36.769
same room they wouldn't be insulting
00:40:36.769 --> 00:40:38.810
each other to their faces like that.
00:40:39.350 --> 00:40:41.209
But online we're all faceless
00:40:41.409 --> 00:40:43.949
and we lose something there.
00:40:43.949 --> 00:40:44.779
There’s a disconnect.
00:40:44.959 --> 00:40:46.129
In fact, I think we could
00:40:46.129 --> 00:40:47.439
become so lost online we could
00:40:47.440 --> 00:40:48.859
disconnect from ourselves, even.
00:40:49.339 --> 00:40:51.889
We’d just get lost in like an algorithm
00:40:52.050 --> 00:40:54.019
or a website or something, and it
00:40:54.020 --> 00:40:55.739
shows us whatever it wants to show us.
00:40:55.739 --> 00:40:57.109
It’s not what we want to see;
00:40:57.110 --> 00:40:58.469
it’s what they want us to see.
00:40:59.629 --> 00:41:02.079
We can lose a complete sense of self.
00:41:02.330 --> 00:41:05.409
Hours can pass in this zombie-like trance.
00:41:06.269 --> 00:41:07.209
I sometimes wonder if the
00:41:07.209 --> 00:41:09.329
internet is stripping us from
00:41:09.330 --> 00:41:10.399
what it means to be human.
00:41:10.649 --> 00:41:13.800
It’s slowly turning us into, I don't
00:41:13.800 --> 00:41:16.299
know, robots or creatures trapped into
00:41:16.649 --> 00:41:19.549
perpetual routines, glued to our devices,
00:41:19.559 --> 00:41:21.639
unable to escape the gravitational pull
00:41:22.039 --> 00:41:24.569
of their algorithm that’s custom-feeding
00:41:24.569 --> 00:41:25.719
us garbage that we don't actually
00:41:25.720 --> 00:41:27.609
want, but they want us to consume it.
00:41:28.250 --> 00:41:29.979
I’ll tell you, being stuck on your phone
00:41:29.979 --> 00:41:31.859
or computer like that, that’s not living.
00:41:32.480 --> 00:41:34.029
If you find yourself stuck in
00:41:34.030 --> 00:41:36.320
an endless scrolling loop, put
00:41:36.330 --> 00:41:38.310
your phone down and ask yourself,
00:41:38.930 --> 00:41:41.180
what choices do I have right now?
00:41:41.849 --> 00:41:43.080
Because if you don't make your own
00:41:43.090 --> 00:41:44.649
choices, someone else will choose
00:41:44.650 --> 00:41:46.509
for you, and you don't want other
00:41:46.509 --> 00:41:48.190
people deciding things for you.
00:41:48.990 --> 00:41:51.500
Anyway, I forgot what you asked.
00:41:51.500 --> 00:41:51.929
I’m sorry.
00:41:51.930 --> 00:41:52.539
I’m stoned.
00:41:53.719 --> 00:41:55.009
JACK: No, it’s okay.
00:41:55.009 --> 00:41:55.869
I don't even remember
00:41:55.869 --> 00:41:56.829
what I asked, either.
00:41:57.629 --> 00:41:58.809
I guess I was just wondering
00:41:59.070 --> 00:42:00.790
if this story has an ending.
00:42:01.320 --> 00:42:01.859
ZACHARIAH: What do you mean?
00:42:02.070 --> 00:42:03.630
This is the end right here.
00:42:04.459 --> 00:42:05.649
JACK: No, I mean — dude,
00:42:05.649 --> 00:42:07.289
you're eighteen now, right?
00:42:07.299 --> 00:42:09.349
Your life has just become this — this
00:42:09.360 --> 00:42:10.739
isn't the end of your story.
00:42:10.739 --> 00:42:13.019
This is your origin story.
00:42:13.250 --> 00:42:14.269
I want to know where you
00:42:14.270 --> 00:42:15.500
end up after all this.
00:42:16.160 --> 00:42:18.069
ZACHARIAH: Hm, I think this is it.
00:42:18.860 --> 00:42:19.870
I don't know what else to do.
00:42:20.389 --> 00:42:21.349
I’ve helped a lot of people.
00:42:21.349 --> 00:42:22.370
I’ve hurt a lot of people.
00:42:23.039 --> 00:42:23.639
I feel like I’ve done a
00:42:26.409 --> 00:42:26.439
lot.
00:42:26.590 --> 00:42:27.809
JACK: You’ve had a whole lifetime of
00:42:27.809 --> 00:42:30.099
experiences before even becoming an adult.
00:42:31.079 --> 00:42:32.850
ZACHARIAH: Yeah, pretty much.
00:42:34.609 --> 00:42:35.270
JACK: Alright, man.
00:42:35.709 --> 00:42:37.239
Well, good luck.
00:42:38.220 --> 00:42:39.399
ZACHARIAH: Okay, thanks.
00:42:39.919 --> 00:42:40.439
You too.
00:42:40.769 --> 00:42:41.449
JACK: Hey man, listen.
00:42:41.510 --> 00:42:42.709
Life doesn't have to be like this.
00:42:42.709 --> 00:42:44.409
It doesn't have to be a war
00:42:44.409 --> 00:42:45.239
that you're always fighting.
00:42:45.239 --> 00:42:47.089
There is a better life for you out
00:42:47.089 --> 00:42:49.059
there, like a life where you're not
00:42:49.070 --> 00:42:50.809
always on the run or having to be
00:42:50.809 --> 00:42:52.609
invisible, where you can live in peace
00:42:52.639 --> 00:42:55.269
and in happiness and be proud of it.
00:42:55.709 --> 00:42:56.990
But it is hard to build.
00:42:56.990 --> 00:42:57.989
You've got to want it.
00:42:57.989 --> 00:42:59.689
You've got to choose it instead of letting
00:42:59.689 --> 00:43:01.409
the world decide your fate for you.
00:43:01.409 --> 00:43:02.319
I’ve seen what happens when
00:43:02.320 --> 00:43:03.449
the world decides for you.
00:43:04.019 --> 00:43:04.480
ZACHARIAH: Well, what about the
00:43:04.480 --> 00:43:05.910
kids who didn't get to choose, the
00:43:05.910 --> 00:43:07.190
ones who got their lives ruined by
00:43:07.190 --> 00:43:09.009
monsters, like what happened to me?
00:43:09.339 --> 00:43:11.130
I know the monsters are still out there,
00:43:11.130 --> 00:43:13.149
and I get to choose what to do about that.
00:43:13.149 --> 00:43:14.640
Should I let them rape boys?
00:43:14.689 --> 00:43:15.149
No.
00:43:15.479 --> 00:43:17.149
My life’s already gone, but maybe,
00:43:17.339 --> 00:43:19.710
just maybe I can stop someone
00:43:19.710 --> 00:43:21.999
else from becoming just like me.
00:43:23.049 --> 00:43:23.779
JACK: I get it, I get it.
00:43:23.779 --> 00:43:24.219
I do.
00:43:24.899 --> 00:43:26.959
You think you're saving them, and maybe
00:43:26.959 --> 00:43:28.969
you are, but Zach, in the process of
00:43:28.969 --> 00:43:31.790
saving their lives, it’s killing you.
00:43:31.799 --> 00:43:32.799
Don't you see that?
00:43:32.809 --> 00:43:33.990
It’s like you're throwing your
00:43:33.990 --> 00:43:36.509
life away, your one and only life
00:43:36.709 --> 00:43:38.259
for a fight that’s never ending.
00:43:38.259 --> 00:43:39.589
You're never gonna win this war.
00:43:39.949 --> 00:43:41.509
Your own life is going to be the
00:43:41.509 --> 00:43:43.489
most valuable thing you ever have,
00:43:43.849 --> 00:43:45.339
and you don't get a second chance.
00:43:45.809 --> 00:43:47.020
If you keep going like this,
00:43:47.020 --> 00:43:49.029
you won't ever see what you're
00:43:49.029 --> 00:43:50.789
losing until it’s too late.
00:43:51.669 --> 00:43:53.599
ZACHARIAH: I know my life is fragile.
00:43:53.649 --> 00:43:55.609
I know I’m burning up.
00:43:55.860 --> 00:43:58.079
But that’s the thing; you don't feel
00:43:58.089 --> 00:44:00.259
alive until you're standing right on
00:44:00.549 --> 00:44:02.329
the edge, and that’s when it hits you.
00:44:03.160 --> 00:44:04.799
Fuck, that drive home after the first
00:44:04.800 --> 00:44:06.930
time I beat the shit out of a pedo, I
00:44:06.930 --> 00:44:08.670
remember arriving home just when the
00:44:08.670 --> 00:44:11.089
sun was coming up, and I never saw
00:44:11.099 --> 00:44:12.779
a more beautiful sunrise than that.
00:44:13.179 --> 00:44:14.670
I remember the air felt fresher.
00:44:15.019 --> 00:44:17.939
The sky was brighter, and I realized how
00:44:17.989 --> 00:44:21.459
lucky I was to be here, still breathing.
00:44:22.509 --> 00:44:24.419
That’s why I do it, because I
00:44:24.429 --> 00:44:26.710
know better than anyone what it
00:44:26.710 --> 00:44:28.769
means to have a fucked-up life.
00:44:30.519 --> 00:44:31.759
JACK: Holy hell.
00:44:33.420 --> 00:44:34.100
ZACHARIAH: Life is shit.
00:44:34.110 --> 00:44:34.720
You know that.
00:44:34.730 --> 00:44:36.180
It’s full of awful people that
00:44:36.180 --> 00:44:37.380
try to do awful things to us.
00:44:37.730 --> 00:44:39.539
It’s full of terrifying situations and
00:44:39.540 --> 00:44:41.660
shitty deals, and if I do something that
00:44:41.660 --> 00:44:44.649
saves some kid’s life, that feels good.
00:44:44.849 --> 00:44:46.029
It feels like my purpose
00:44:46.029 --> 00:44:46.979
here is fulfilled.
00:44:47.670 --> 00:44:50.110
I know I’m not a good kid, but
00:44:50.320 --> 00:44:52.419
maybe I don't have to be good
00:44:52.789 --> 00:44:54.150
to make a positive difference.
00:44:55.330 --> 00:44:56.249
JACK: Yeah, but they're never gonna
00:44:56.250 --> 00:44:58.370
know you sacrificed yourself for them.
00:44:59.709 --> 00:45:00.419
ZACHARIAH: What do you want me to
00:45:00.420 --> 00:45:02.679
do, be just like everyone else with
00:45:02.680 --> 00:45:05.079
their gym memberships and 9-to-5 jobs
00:45:05.079 --> 00:45:07.949
and family photos at Christmastime?
00:45:08.410 --> 00:45:09.529
I don't have time to
00:45:09.529 --> 00:45:10.599
care about any of that.
00:45:10.649 --> 00:45:13.039
I am in survival mode here, and
00:45:13.040 --> 00:45:14.620
I’m running as fast as I can
00:45:14.620 --> 00:45:16.379
to not let fate catch up to me.
00:45:17.029 --> 00:45:19.609
I can see it’s closing it, and I don't
00:45:19.610 --> 00:45:21.330
think anyone has time for that stuff.
00:45:21.939 --> 00:45:23.300
They just haven't realized it yet.
00:45:23.300 --> 00:45:26.049
[Music] Shit, I have to go.
00:45:27.789 --> 00:45:29.209
I hope your show does great.
00:45:29.989 --> 00:45:30.629
It’s pretty good.
00:45:31.430 --> 00:45:32.120
I hope you do good.
00:45:32.859 --> 00:45:34.329
JACK: Okay, thanks.
00:45:34.519 --> 00:45:34.969
Take care.
00:45:35.089 --> 00:45:35.580
Talk later.
00:45:36.159 --> 00:45:36.799
ZACHARIAH: Alright, bye.
00:45:38.239 --> 00:45:39.769
JACK: That was the last time
00:45:39.769 --> 00:45:41.240
I ever spoke with Zachariah.
00:45:42.199 --> 00:45:44.269
He went silent after that call and it's
00:45:44.269 --> 00:45:46.729
now been seven years with no updates.
00:45:47.659 --> 00:45:47.689
This
00:46:23.899 --> 00:46:25.849
show was created by me, Jack Rhysider.
00:46:26.169 --> 00:46:27.789
I wrote, produced, narrated
00:46:27.909 --> 00:46:28.649
and sound designed it.
00:46:29.229 --> 00:46:30.950
I even did the voice for Zachariah
00:46:31.149 --> 00:46:32.549
using a voice changing effect.
00:46:33.339 --> 00:46:35.419
Final mixing done by Proximity Sound.
00:46:35.949 --> 00:46:38.210
Music supervision by Scott Polasquez.
00:46:39.800 --> 00:46:42.990
Just remember this, you don't a life.
00:46:43.770 --> 00:46:45.850
You get a chance at one.
00:46:47.289 --> 00:46:48.690
This is LOW.