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All right, on today's episode, we're going to talk about the invisible programs running your life.
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And until you address these and change these, nothing in your life's going to change, right?
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I'm Coach Mike Basfick, and this is the show for high performers who tried everything else and still can't quiet their own minds.
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Who am I and why should you listen to me?
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I'm Coach Mike Baszik.
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I'm the founder and creator of the Anxiety-Free Executive Program as part of my No Limous Nation.
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For the last 18 years, I've done nothing.
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Well, I've done other things, but I've done, I spent them helping high-performing professionals, right?
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Executives, successful people, eliminate, okay, all of the gremlins in their mind.
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The anxiety, the stress, the overwhelm, the imposter syndrome, the depression, you name it.
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We get rid of it so they could live the life, either enjoy the success they built or live a life at an entirely new level of success, right?
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And much of that work over the years is getting rid of those programmed patterns.
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I hate to use the word program because it's an overused self-help term, but it's getting rid of these patterns of behavior.
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And once we do that, then big things happen.
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And the patterns of behavior are what we call paradigms.
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Now, what's a paradigm?
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A paradigm is essentially how you see and what you expect from yourself and or the world.
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We have self paradigms, right?
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Who am I?
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What I'm capable of?
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I'm a shy person.
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I'm an introvert.
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I'm an extrovert and we have paradigms about the world.
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The world's a tough place.
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Life's tough, then you die.
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That was what I grew up with, right?
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And waiting for the other shoe to drop.
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And where do these paradigms come from, right?
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They come from our childhood.
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They come from society.
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I give you some really good examples in addition to the couple I gave you, but those paradigms are running your life.
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All right.
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Everything running your life.
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You're never going to do.
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There's some facts.
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There's some things that you have to understand here.
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If you understand anything about this world, anything about human behavior, anything about your mind, you're never going to outwork your state of being.
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If you've got a state of being of what I call resistance, inadequacy, insecurity, self-sabotage, look at my life.
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So, you know, you know my story.
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If you haven't, you should listen to these episodes and understand that I detail it.
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I book The Broken Sage, man.
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If you haven't gotten that book yet,
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What are you doing, man?
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What are you waiting for?
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This book, this freaking book is epic, man.
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And it's not because I wrote it.
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I lived it.
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And I've changed so many thousands of lives with the exact same formula in this book, starting with my own.
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But I can promise you, man, when I held on to these paradigms, but the states of being I was moving into, I was in a complete state of being from my conditioning, from my childhood, of inadequacy.
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I never thought I deserved success, so what did I do?
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I subconsciously self-sabotaged it.
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Can you relate to that one right?
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No matter how hard you work, no matter how much money comes in, it's always going out the door.
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No matter how nice of a person you are, no matter how great you are, you feel you are in relationships, man, you're always treated like shit.
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Right.
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And there's some successful, like really successful, like celebrities.
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Right.
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And you look at the relationships, they're a train wreck and, and they're interviewed and they say, well, I don't know.
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I, you know, I'm not sure why somewhere inside they're in a state of being that's not in harmony.
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with the outcome they want.
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So you're never going to outperform or outwork your current state of being and your conditioned states of being.
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You're never going to outperform a limiting belief, man.
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If you want to make a million dollars a year and you think that's impossible, you could grind and you can work and you can obsess and you could visualize, you could write pictures and have pictures all over the place and post-it notes and shit about you being a millionaire, you're never going to get it.
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If you don't believe it, you're never going to outwork and outperform a limiting belief.
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It's impossible.
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And you're never going to out, outlive, outperform, outdo a paradigm.
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A paradigm is where you see life, the way you see yourself.
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And that's what you're going to experience.
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So I tell my clients all the time that they're self-fulfilling prophets.
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What do I mean by that?
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It means very simply, what you expect to happen in your life is going to happen.
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Period.
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In the story, the physical world that we live in.
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is is not as real as you think it is all a byproduct of your inner world day after day after day after day what you believe will happen what you expect will happen happens like look at your life tell me that that's not true i'm not talking about what you want to happen right what you want to happen let's say you're single and you know that you're you're you're a good person you want to meet your soulmate
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But you're in a state of being of loneliness or lack or you go into.
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I remember when I was licking my wounds from my divorce and a subsequent relationship with a bunny and a pot girl, if you will.
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Right.
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You ever see what is it called?
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Fatal Attraction.
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She put the bunny in the pot.
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Well, this person I was in a relationship was pretty similar to that, the bunny in the pot girl.
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And I had to get out of it, but I was in a relationship for a while.
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And after that, man, I was licking my wounds.
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I'm like, oh my God, you know, the marriage, the divorce, this stuff.
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And I remember this like shopping in Target and everybody else seemed to be coupled up with me.
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I'd go to parties and everybody else had a couple except for I was a single guy, right?
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And I wasn't a bar guy.
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I wasn't going to go out and meet girls and stuff.
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But, man, I just wanted a relationship.
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I'm a family guy.
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I'm not that guy that's going to be out there and just dating and one after another.
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I'm, you know, and Kelly and I have a wonderful relationship.
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And, you know, I'm a lucky guy.
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But...
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I am a lucky guy because I changed my paradigm to believe I'm a lucky guy.
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And I'll tell you that story in a minute.
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But I was always in that state, like, you know, in that belief that, man, there's no good ones out there anymore.
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Relationships are tough.
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And I had that life, like, but I had to change that.
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Yeah.
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But my life to that point is where all that shit came from, and I need to change.
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So today, you know, we've talked about the state of being, and we'll talk about the state of being again, ad nauseum.
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And I lay all this out, chapter 13 in the book, all about paradigms, all about limiting beliefs, man, and the exact form of how to change them, which we're going to talk about today.
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But everything you are today is a byproduct of everything you've been through and the way you were raised, man, your childhood.
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So your political views, your views, like I always tell my clients, racists aren't born.
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They're conditioned.
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Everything's conditioned.
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If you think relationships are tough, that's learned behavior.
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If you think relationships are easy, that's learned behavior.
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If you think life is tough, learned behavior.
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Life is easy, learned behavior.
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It's a paradigm.
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And it's all because of your upbringing, your state of being, and what you've experienced.
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And now you've developed those rigid beliefs, but they're just not true.
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And you've got to take a look at like, okay, is this paradigm, is this belief serving me or is it not?
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And if it isn't, then you've got to do something about it.
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Well, since it's learned behavior through repetition, then maybe we can unlearn it and do something different.
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Wouldn't that make sense?
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A lot more fun that way, right?
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So think about some of the global paradigms we have.
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And every one of these things you'll relate to.
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We say, waiting for the other shoe to drop, right?
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That's where life's tough and then you die.
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Don't trust anybody, man.
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Don't get too confident.
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Life has a way of kicking you in the ass when you're too high.
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And how do we know that?
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Because we've experienced it.
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We expect it.
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And then we experience it.
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I don't like Mondays.
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Right?
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Mondays.
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Poor Mondays get a bad rap.
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I love Mondays.
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I love Tuesdays.
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I love every day.
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I'm, yeah.
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I'm not one of those like rah-rah positive speak guys.
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I hate that shit.
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Okay?
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But I am a happy guy.
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I wasn't a happy guy.
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Man, I was deep down in it.
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Now, as a young person, when I was, you know, prior to learning this work, I had a lot of wonderful moments in my life.
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I was a fun, happy guy.
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Yeah.
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But inside, I was a frickin' volcano, man, waiting to erupt.
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I never felt comfortable.
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I never was like, I'd used humor at that time as a distraction.
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I was like, at times, man, I was, you know, nutty.
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And I just, I would have fun, man.
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And, but then when that fun was over, I'd go back to that dread.
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I didn't trust, man.
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Peace was an imposter.
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Peace was like suspicious.
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I never trusted peace.
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And because I was always waiting for you to shoot your job.
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Why?
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Because that's what I was taught.
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And that's what I would experience.
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And I would make stupid ass mistakes, but all the paradigms would play out in my life.
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And at that point, I not only hated Mondays, Sunday afternoon, dread would kick in.
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And that was learned behavior.
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That was my paradigm, right?
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But think about it.
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I don't like Mondays.
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They wrote songs about
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The Bengals wrote Manic Monday.
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Who wrote I Don't Like Mondays, that song, back in the 80s?
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And everybody, like, talks about Mondays.
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Oh, must be a Monday.
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I got a case of the Mondays, right?
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And then, God, thank God it's Friday.
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Right.
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We've been taught.
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Thank God it's Friday, man.
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I can't wait to get to the weekend living for the weekend.
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Right.
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That's a song.
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TGIF.
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There's a whole frickin restaurant brand.
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Thank God it's Friday.
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Why?
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Because we're so miserable during the week because work sucks.
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That's what we're taught.
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That's a paradigm.
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Right.
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You've got to be you got to work your ass off for success.
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You've got to pay the price for success.
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You've got to never rest.
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Don't grind.
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Someone else is out grinding all ridiculous paradigms.
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that aren't serving you.
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They're just literally building up.
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Now you should work hard.
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You should put the time in, no question, but it's a paradigm, right?
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If I say the age of 65, paradigm says retirement.
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Talk to the guy that retired at 48 or the woman that retired at 50, right?
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They must not have believed the paradigm.
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I'm going to retire early, right?
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18, oh, let's vote.
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21, now I'm an
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It's all paradigms, man.
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And we're like, as soon as you meet somebody, how old are you?
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Right.
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We want to go to age.
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Oh, you're eight.
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Oh my God.
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You're, you're 50.
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Yeah.
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Life, you know, this 50s, new 30 or, or whatever.
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Okay.
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It's we're, we're littered with paradigms.
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Right.
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And I, I just don't, I don't trust relationships.
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I don't, uh, money is hard.
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I think about the paradigms over money.
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that we're taught, man.
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Money is the root of all evil.
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You know, you've got to work hard for money.
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Don't trust people.
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If it's free, it's too good to be free.
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This podcast is free.
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All right, there's no strings attached here, man.
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Yeah, we want you to, if you need help, to reach out to us.
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And of course, we'll talk about that, but it's free.
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There's no strings attached here.
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You don't even have to opt in to anything.
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You just hit play and listen.
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So maybe it's not too good if something's free.
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But we're taught that way, and we're taught don't trust.
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And families, how many millions of families are broken up over the estate?
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I've got a lot of financial advisors in my program.
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I hear these horror stories all the time, and I've seen these horror stories all the time.
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And these families just break up, man, over money and bullshit.
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00:11:07.392 --> 00:11:08.713
And people lose their effing mind.
238
00:11:08.793 --> 00:11:10.853
Dateline, watch the Dateline episodes, right?
239
00:11:11.514 --> 00:11:13.854
And 90% of them are over money.
240
00:11:14.615 --> 00:11:18.456
Money or affairs, but even the affairs are usually tied into money.
241
00:11:18.856 --> 00:11:19.756
But it's always money.
242
00:11:20.336 --> 00:11:22.337
And that's a paradigm, man.
243
00:11:22.757 --> 00:11:24.537
But money is energy like anything else.
244
00:11:24.557 --> 00:11:25.858
So what if money just flowed?
245
00:11:26.563 --> 00:11:27.484
What if money was easy?
246
00:11:27.504 --> 00:11:29.565
And as soon as I say, man, money's easy, it could flow.
247
00:11:29.605 --> 00:11:32.927
You can make whatever you'd like to make, or you can have that dream life.
248
00:11:33.387 --> 00:11:34.788
Right away, your mind goes, no, you can't.
249
00:11:35.408 --> 00:11:36.549
No, you can't, because I've been there.
250
00:11:36.849 --> 00:11:37.289
I've done it.
251
00:11:37.669 --> 00:11:42.872
And you hang on to those freaking paradigms and hang on to those freaking beliefs like they're gospel.
252
00:11:43.113 --> 00:11:43.493
They're not.
253
00:11:44.133 --> 00:11:45.514
They're learned behavior.
254
00:11:46.214 --> 00:11:48.676
So you've got to start changing the paradigm, right?
255
00:11:48.716 --> 00:11:50.197
And think more about money.
256
00:11:51.075 --> 00:11:53.876
You know, look at who the bad person is, right?
257
00:11:53.916 --> 00:12:01.939
And every Disney movie ever made, not every Disney movie ever made, but you think about the villain.
258
00:12:02.459 --> 00:12:03.820
It's always the wealthy person.
259
00:12:04.440 --> 00:12:10.042
It's always the king or the prince or, you know, I think Cruella de Vil in 101 Dalmatians, I think she had a ton of money.
260
00:12:10.942 --> 00:12:12.964
And how about It's a Wonderful Life?
261
00:12:13.464 --> 00:12:16.146
In my opinion, probably the finest Christmas movie ever made.
262
00:12:16.286 --> 00:12:24.553
There's a biopic coming out on Jimmy Stewart, and it's centered around that movie, like his after the war and how he was battling depression, and he made that movie.
263
00:12:25.093 --> 00:12:25.774
Can't wait to see it.
264
00:12:26.554 --> 00:12:27.215
There's another one.
265
00:12:27.395 --> 00:12:28.536
I play Rocky coming out.
266
00:12:28.556 --> 00:12:30.777
My God, I'm excited for that because Rocky...
267
00:12:31.687 --> 00:12:33.088
This guy was living in his car.
268
00:12:33.729 --> 00:12:34.369
He had no money.
269
00:12:34.689 --> 00:12:35.750
He had to sell his dog.
270
00:12:35.870 --> 00:12:38.012
The dog you see in Rocky, that was a dog he sold.
271
00:12:38.492 --> 00:12:39.533
And he bought the dog back.
272
00:12:40.113 --> 00:12:42.195
And they offered him $250,000 for that script.
273
00:12:42.235 --> 00:12:43.456
And he said, no, I play Rocky.
274
00:12:43.976 --> 00:12:44.917
That's the thing.
275
00:12:44.937 --> 00:12:46.338
And he wouldn't sell it.
276
00:12:46.358 --> 00:12:47.219
And look what happened there.
277
00:12:47.939 --> 00:12:48.780
Anyway, I digress.
278
00:12:48.840 --> 00:12:50.421
But you look at It's a Wonderful Life.
279
00:12:51.382 --> 00:12:53.504
And Mr. Potter...
280
00:12:54.204 --> 00:12:58.265
The richest guy in town, the biggest jag in town, the prick, right?
281
00:12:58.685 --> 00:13:04.947
The villain, you know, Mr. Potter, gets his dirty little grubby fingers on it, as George Bailey said.
282
00:13:05.748 --> 00:13:09.189
But we've been conditioned to think that money is a certain thing.
283
00:13:09.209 --> 00:13:11.470
Well, talk to successful people.
284
00:13:11.510 --> 00:13:12.410
Talk to philanthropists.
285
00:13:12.430 --> 00:13:17.031
Talk to people that have money and give money and volunteer their time and do good with that money.
286
00:13:17.071 --> 00:13:18.292
They would say money's easy, man.
287
00:13:19.172 --> 00:13:19.832
It's a paradigm.
288
00:13:20.113 --> 00:13:20.713
It's a belief.
289
00:13:20.753 --> 00:13:25.995
And if you want more money, then you've got to change your paradigm.
290
00:13:26.235 --> 00:13:30.337
If you want better relationships or a relationship in general, you've got to change your belief.
291
00:13:30.357 --> 00:13:31.398
You've got to change your paradigm.
292
00:13:32.187 --> 00:13:34.988
If you want to start thinking that life is easy, then you better change.
293
00:13:35.008 --> 00:13:36.048
And how do we do all that?
294
00:13:36.548 --> 00:13:40.230
We do it the same way that we did the first thing.
295
00:13:40.250 --> 00:13:42.930
We've got to change what we're feeding our mind.
296
00:13:43.531 --> 00:13:48.932
The repetitious statements, the dialogue, the stories.
297
00:13:49.492 --> 00:13:50.873
We've got to start changing that stuff.
298
00:13:50.913 --> 00:13:52.113
I was talking to a client yesterday.
299
00:13:53.014 --> 00:13:55.954
And she's in the program, just got here.
300
00:13:55.994 --> 00:13:57.055
She's new in our community.
301
00:13:57.155 --> 00:13:57.395
But...
302
00:13:58.107 --> 00:14:05.992
You know, she's so glued to her circumstances, man, and her relationship that's not great and her finances that are so-so.
303
00:14:06.873 --> 00:14:10.115
And she just grew up with this tremendous...
304
00:14:11.271 --> 00:14:12.691
Um, inadequacy, right?
305
00:14:12.731 --> 00:14:22.554
Family was what they would call a broken family and just had a little wonderful person, great personality, um, good looking human being.
306
00:14:23.234 --> 00:14:24.874
And yet feels completely inadequate.
307
00:14:25.815 --> 00:14:27.815
Uh, like, like she doesn't deserve anything.
308
00:14:29.075 --> 00:14:31.216
And so I said, are you doing the work?
309
00:14:31.496 --> 00:14:33.396
Yeah, but I said, yeah, but what?
310
00:14:33.756 --> 00:14:34.837
Yeah, but I'm still sad.
311
00:14:35.297 --> 00:14:37.537
Yeah, but I still, uh, am experiencing lack.
312
00:14:37.577 --> 00:14:39.718
Yeah, but I'm still like, don't know what to do here.
313
00:14:40.798 --> 00:14:42.679
And I said, well, have you made any progress yet?
314
00:14:43.479 --> 00:14:45.860
And she says, I have, but I said, stop the but.
315
00:14:46.420 --> 00:14:48.061
Everything after but is white noise to me.
316
00:14:48.601 --> 00:14:49.822
Have you made progress?
317
00:14:50.322 --> 00:14:50.562
Yes.
318
00:14:50.582 --> 00:14:53.743
I said, what if you start changing the words that you're speaking?
319
00:14:54.264 --> 00:14:59.046
Because the words you're speaking are you're speaking it to your subconscious mind, and the subconscious mind becomes it.
320
00:14:59.966 --> 00:15:01.007
Yeah, but I'm still sad.
321
00:15:01.067 --> 00:15:01.648
Subconscious mind.
322
00:15:01.668 --> 00:15:02.849
I said, sure, I'll give you more sadness.
323
00:15:02.869 --> 00:15:04.430
Remember what I talked about in that episode?
324
00:15:04.991 --> 00:15:07.794
The subconscious mind has no opinion, has no judgment.
325
00:15:08.154 --> 00:15:11.938
It's going to do what you consistently train it to do and what you believe about yourself.
326
00:15:13.099 --> 00:15:18.844
So this person just believes that it's difficult to get rid of it and believes that that's their lot in life.
327
00:15:19.765 --> 00:15:22.548
And I said, well, what if you start saying that you're terrific every day?
328
00:15:22.568 --> 00:15:23.509
So I don't want to lie.
329
00:15:23.549 --> 00:15:24.049
I said, why?
330
00:15:24.069 --> 00:15:24.149
Why?
331
00:15:24.925 --> 00:15:26.466
You lied your entire life.
332
00:15:27.186 --> 00:15:28.447
You're a fine human being.
333
00:15:28.487 --> 00:15:29.388
You're a good person.
334
00:15:29.408 --> 00:15:30.888
You've got good morals, good character.
335
00:15:31.249 --> 00:15:32.089
You're hardworking.
336
00:15:32.389 --> 00:15:33.510
You keep yourself in shape.
337
00:15:33.530 --> 00:15:36.351
You're doing everything right that you believe in life.
338
00:15:36.872 --> 00:15:38.793
But you kept telling yourself that you're no good.
339
00:15:39.713 --> 00:15:41.474
And you kept telling your mind that you're no good.
340
00:15:41.494 --> 00:15:43.535
You kept obsessing about your mistakes.
341
00:15:43.555 --> 00:15:44.936
You kept revisiting your mistakes.
342
00:15:45.417 --> 00:15:47.478
And you kept keep that dialogue going.
343
00:15:49.045 --> 00:15:50.126
And it wasn't true.
344
00:15:50.926 --> 00:15:53.148
You can make a mistake and still be a great person.
345
00:15:53.708 --> 00:15:54.889
Every person makes mistakes.
346
00:15:54.969 --> 00:15:56.189
I was the king of making mistakes.
347
00:15:56.229 --> 00:15:57.350
Deep down, I was a good person.
348
00:15:57.370 --> 00:15:58.270
I was a good person.
349
00:15:58.290 --> 00:16:01.072
I was doing really stupid things back in resistance.
350
00:16:02.253 --> 00:16:03.813
And you kept telling yourself that story.
351
00:16:03.833 --> 00:16:05.054
You kept telling yourself that story.
352
00:16:05.074 --> 00:16:06.055
Were you telling the truth?
353
00:16:07.375 --> 00:16:08.176
And she says, well, no.
354
00:16:08.556 --> 00:16:12.819
I said, well, that's how you got to the paradigms and the beliefs you got to now and the states of being.
355
00:16:12.859 --> 00:16:14.700
So how about this story?
356
00:16:14.740 --> 00:16:15.640
Are you getting better?
357
00:16:15.680 --> 00:16:17.561
Have you, are you better than you were last week?
358
00:16:17.641 --> 00:16:18.122
She says, yep.
359
00:16:19.002 --> 00:16:21.023
I said, are you better than you were two weeks ago?
360
00:16:21.524 --> 00:16:23.345
Even every, she says, I am.
361
00:16:23.965 --> 00:16:25.086
I said, so how about this?
362
00:16:26.427 --> 00:16:30.029
When I ask you how the work's going, it's going well and I'm getting better every day.
363
00:16:31.058 --> 00:16:35.040
So you start teaching your mind that every day, and guess what the mind's going to do?
364
00:16:35.661 --> 00:16:37.061
Okay, we're getting better every day.
365
00:16:37.401 --> 00:16:38.262
Getting better every day.
366
00:16:38.322 --> 00:16:40.063
The mind is the machine that runs you.
367
00:16:40.163 --> 00:16:41.604
I know you think that your mind is you.
368
00:16:41.644 --> 00:16:42.064
It's not.
369
00:16:42.884 --> 00:16:46.146
It's a machine that runs you based on the training you've given it.
370
00:16:46.746 --> 00:16:52.630
So everything that's housed in there, your beliefs, the words you speak, your paradigms, your states of being—
371
00:16:53.490 --> 00:16:58.472
Everything that you're experiencing in your life that's playing on your physical world, it's all learned behavior.
372
00:16:59.012 --> 00:17:00.112
So we've got to teach it in a way.
373
00:17:00.252 --> 00:17:01.253
So how about that story?
374
00:17:01.993 --> 00:17:03.793
She said, okay, I can buy into that story.
375
00:17:04.333 --> 00:17:05.574
So how's the work going?
376
00:17:05.734 --> 00:17:05.974
Good.
377
00:17:06.454 --> 00:17:07.434
I'm getting better every day.
378
00:17:07.454 --> 00:17:10.575
I said, you should walk around saying that all day long.
379
00:17:11.076 --> 00:17:14.857
And anything else, if you think relationships are tough, find examples.
380
00:17:15.497 --> 00:17:15.737
Right?
381
00:17:15.837 --> 00:17:17.178
Show your subconscious mind.
382
00:17:17.198 --> 00:17:18.298
Well, look at that relationship.
383
00:17:18.318 --> 00:17:18.938
That's a good one.
384
00:17:19.458 --> 00:17:20.439
Look at that relationship.
385
00:17:20.459 --> 00:17:20.999
That's a good one.
386
00:17:21.319 --> 00:17:24.780
You know, I said, I was at one of my live events last year.
387
00:17:24.800 --> 00:17:26.961
We got together with the group after the event.
388
00:17:27.801 --> 00:17:31.302
And this woman came up to me that's a longtime client.
389
00:17:31.823 --> 00:17:40.145
And she goes, Mike, I marvel at you and Kelly of how much you love each other and how, like, dynamic you guys are and all that stuff.
390
00:17:40.185 --> 00:17:40.786
And she goes, man...
391
00:17:42.106 --> 00:17:43.628
She goes, I envy that.
392
00:17:44.489 --> 00:17:51.015
And I said, yeah, you should have seen me 20 years ago when I couldn't, you know, sustain a good relationship.
393
00:17:51.075 --> 00:17:53.698
And I, you know, and I said, it's all learned behavior.
394
00:17:54.238 --> 00:17:57.602
I had to change me in order to have relationships like I have now.
395
00:17:58.377 --> 00:17:59.598
I had to change my state of being.
396
00:17:59.618 --> 00:18:00.499
I had to change my beliefs.
397
00:18:00.519 --> 00:18:01.519
I had to change my paradigms.
398
00:18:01.559 --> 00:18:03.161
That's the key to this whole deal, guys.
399
00:18:03.941 --> 00:18:09.105
Everyone's living in the circumstances, even though the circumstances are a byproduct of the person you've been up to this point.
400
00:18:09.905 --> 00:18:10.746
So you got a choice now.
401
00:18:10.966 --> 00:18:12.808
Stay consumed by the circumstances.
402
00:18:13.208 --> 00:18:14.549
Keep living in it like I was.
403
00:18:14.649 --> 00:18:16.550
Read chapter four on the Broken Sage, guys.
404
00:18:16.710 --> 00:18:17.751
Read chapter four.
405
00:18:18.272 --> 00:18:19.713
You'll be like, man, this guy was a shit show.
406
00:18:20.273 --> 00:18:22.075
But I was consumed with my circumstances.
407
00:18:22.796 --> 00:18:25.399
And everything that happened up to that point in my entire life.
408
00:18:26.240 --> 00:18:30.606
And then when I realized life was an inside job, then I started to change all that stuff.
409
00:18:30.646 --> 00:18:31.827
And I changed the paradigms.
410
00:18:32.688 --> 00:18:34.531
And I just taught my mind with repetition.
411
00:18:34.551 --> 00:18:38.516
Now, one thing I had to go through, so every month it was a struggle to survive at that point.
412
00:18:39.860 --> 00:18:42.383
And every month I'd be like, man, I don't know how I'm going to make it.
413
00:18:42.403 --> 00:18:45.065
But then I realized I make it every month.
414
00:18:45.666 --> 00:18:46.627
I figure out a way.
415
00:18:47.107 --> 00:18:47.888
I get creative.
416
00:18:47.908 --> 00:18:50.090
I do whatever I have to do, but I figure out a way.
417
00:18:50.751 --> 00:18:53.954
And as I started to do this work and my mind started to clear, I had this thought one day.
418
00:18:54.975 --> 00:18:56.556
I went from I struggle every month.
419
00:18:56.596 --> 00:18:57.217
It's a struggle.
420
00:18:57.277 --> 00:18:57.817
Life's tough.
421
00:18:58.701 --> 00:19:02.766
I went to, I started to realize that, man, you, you, you make it every month.
422
00:19:02.786 --> 00:19:04.748
You figured out, so way not change that story.
423
00:19:05.809 --> 00:19:07.812
Like, Hey, you always find a way.
424
00:19:08.532 --> 00:19:13.839
So my consistent belief paradigm started to be like, you know, you always find a way.
425
00:19:14.379 --> 00:19:16.121
So every time my mind threw that up to me,
426
00:19:16.862 --> 00:19:18.103
I would accept my state of being.
427
00:19:19.103 --> 00:19:21.464
And then I would say, you know, you always find a way.
428
00:19:22.024 --> 00:19:22.405
That's all right.
429
00:19:22.425 --> 00:19:23.005
We'll find a way.
430
00:19:23.025 --> 00:19:23.605
We always do.
431
00:19:24.405 --> 00:19:25.386
Everything always works out.
432
00:19:25.586 --> 00:19:26.206
It always does.
433
00:19:26.887 --> 00:19:28.627
And I said it a thousand times a day.
434
00:19:29.268 --> 00:19:32.849
I'd walk around like, yeah, every time my mind would say, oh my God, Mike, get that bill coming.
435
00:19:32.869 --> 00:19:33.209
You got that.
436
00:19:33.249 --> 00:19:33.950
You got child support.
437
00:19:33.970 --> 00:19:34.290
You got that.
438
00:19:34.850 --> 00:19:35.070
Yeah.
439
00:19:35.511 --> 00:19:36.151
I always find a way.
440
00:19:36.891 --> 00:19:37.471
I always find a way.
441
00:19:38.032 --> 00:19:38.532
And guess what?
442
00:19:39.252 --> 00:19:39.993
I always found a way.
443
00:19:40.733 --> 00:19:43.214
And I was a self-fulfilling prophet.
444
00:19:43.234 --> 00:19:44.735
Then things started to go my way.
445
00:19:45.650 --> 00:19:46.550
little bit by little bit.
446
00:19:47.171 --> 00:19:48.031
And I thought, you know what?
447
00:19:48.871 --> 00:19:49.872
Everything goes my way.
448
00:19:50.752 --> 00:19:51.432
Everything's fine.
449
00:19:51.472 --> 00:19:53.433
Everything's gonna be okay.
450
00:19:53.553 --> 00:19:55.694
And now I said, no, I said, things started to go my way.
451
00:19:56.774 --> 00:19:58.695
And everything works out.
452
00:19:58.875 --> 00:20:07.799
There's a sign right behind me that I picked up at Pier 1 in like 2007 that says, not to spoil the ending, but everything's gonna be fine.
453
00:20:08.699 --> 00:20:12.721
And I started to train my mind that obsessively all day long, I'd walk around saying it.
454
00:20:13.681 --> 00:20:20.087
And then things continued to go my way and I started to get some good luck and I was doing this work obsessively.
455
00:20:20.568 --> 00:20:24.131
Stuff I teach all my clients now and everything was getting better and better.
456
00:20:24.932 --> 00:20:27.334
I said, you know, life's getting easier.
457
00:20:28.095 --> 00:20:28.876
I started that one.
458
00:20:29.416 --> 00:20:30.677
I said, things are going my way.
459
00:20:31.678 --> 00:20:34.200
And I started to get lucky and I'm a lucky guy.
460
00:20:35.382 --> 00:20:38.725
And I put a penny in my pocket as a reminder of my new paradigm.
461
00:20:39.435 --> 00:20:40.055
And I'm a lucky guy.
462
00:20:40.075 --> 00:20:42.316
And I'd walk around all day like, man, life is easy.
463
00:20:42.996 --> 00:20:43.496
I'm blessed.
464
00:20:43.536 --> 00:20:44.836
I'm so grateful for this life.
465
00:20:45.716 --> 00:20:47.916
Things go my way and I'm a lucky guy.
466
00:20:48.497 --> 00:20:49.517
Now, am I lucky every day?
467
00:20:49.577 --> 00:20:51.077
No, but I'm blessed every day.
468
00:20:51.617 --> 00:20:53.197
I have been since then.
469
00:20:53.217 --> 00:20:53.878
You know why?
470
00:20:53.918 --> 00:20:58.558
Because I've got a beautiful, wonderful wife that is healthy and I'm healthy.
471
00:20:58.598 --> 00:21:00.459
My kids are, our kids are healthy, five kids.
472
00:21:00.479 --> 00:21:02.459
We've got, we've got challenges.
473
00:21:02.499 --> 00:21:03.159
I run a business.
474
00:21:03.179 --> 00:21:04.399
We've got live, we've got five kids.
475
00:21:04.419 --> 00:21:05.800
We've got challenges like everyone else.
476
00:21:05.860 --> 00:21:07.480
You're never gonna be void of challenges.
477
00:21:08.600 --> 00:21:11.282
But I just said that over and over and over again.
478
00:21:12.023 --> 00:21:16.846
And even when I met Kelly, we were driving to a concert one time, she says, we're never gonna find parking.
479
00:21:16.866 --> 00:21:19.467
I said, Kel, things work out for me, I'm a lucky guy.
480
00:21:19.487 --> 00:21:23.050
And she laughed and we got the parking right out front and she said, man,
481
00:21:23.750 --> 00:21:25.791
and to this day, I carry this coin.
482
00:21:25.931 --> 00:21:35.113
Those are on video, see it, but it says no limits on the front and luck magnet on the back, and that's my reminder of my paradigm, right, and that's essentially what it is, guys.
483
00:21:35.133 --> 00:21:42.655
It doesn't take this act of God or, you know, EMDR or shock therapy to change a belief and change a paradigm.
484
00:21:43.215 --> 00:21:45.876
It takes repetition, and I know when you say it,
485
00:21:46.805 --> 00:21:47.646
you're not going to believe it.
486
00:21:47.907 --> 00:21:50.150
If you're overwhelmed and say, you know, my schedule's easier.
487
00:21:50.851 --> 00:21:51.672
Life's getting easier.
488
00:21:51.712 --> 00:21:53.014
Your mind's going to say, no, it's not.
489
00:21:53.595 --> 00:21:54.315
You're full of shit.
490
00:21:54.356 --> 00:21:55.036
Mine did too.
491
00:21:56.118 --> 00:21:59.963
But your mind is taking direction from you, so it's only doing what you trained it to do.
492
00:22:00.784 --> 00:22:02.046
Start to train it another way.
493
00:22:02.947 --> 00:22:03.748
And that's what I did.
494
00:22:04.188 --> 00:22:08.250
And I walked around obsessively, you know, man, things are going my way.
495
00:22:08.990 --> 00:22:09.671
Life is easy.
496
00:22:09.691 --> 00:22:10.291
I love life.
497
00:22:11.192 --> 00:22:14.653
And, um, I'm a lucky guy and I have been, I've been blessed.
498
00:22:14.673 --> 00:22:16.014
This is my final day on earth.
499
00:22:16.694 --> 00:22:18.055
I got more to do, so let's hope not.
500
00:22:18.475 --> 00:22:21.797
But, um, I've been a lucky guy and everything.
501
00:22:21.857 --> 00:22:22.337
I'm blessed.
502
00:22:22.417 --> 00:22:24.018
And that's the perspective I've developed.
503
00:22:24.038 --> 00:22:26.360
And I've had challenges in my life, just like anyone else.
504
00:22:26.980 --> 00:22:30.722
And I moved through those challenges and I, and I'm just so grateful and blessed that
505
00:22:30.982 --> 00:22:31.502
for this life.
506
00:22:32.303 --> 00:22:39.226
And when you read the book, um, when you hear my story in detail, you'll say, you know, he had bad luck because that was what I believed.
507
00:22:39.706 --> 00:22:40.607
That was my paradigm.
508
00:22:41.347 --> 00:22:44.569
So that's my, you know, my transformation to this work.
509
00:22:45.149 --> 00:22:49.391
And I said, you're never going to hear me speak words that are not in line with that.
510
00:22:49.431 --> 00:22:53.513
Last year, you know, I lost my mom and she was older.
511
00:22:54.047 --> 00:22:54.167
Right.
512
00:22:54.187 --> 00:22:55.087
And it was her time.
513
00:22:55.808 --> 00:22:56.888
And it was very sad.
514
00:22:58.029 --> 00:23:00.029
But the next day when someone said, Mike, how you doing?
515
00:23:00.049 --> 00:23:00.650
It's terrific.
516
00:23:01.330 --> 00:23:02.010
How you doing, man?
517
00:23:02.110 --> 00:23:02.470
Wonderful.
518
00:23:02.490 --> 00:23:05.712
You're never going to hear me speak words that I don't want to live.
519
00:23:06.552 --> 00:23:09.653
And I believe when I say, I'm not just pretend saying I'm terrific.
520
00:23:09.693 --> 00:23:10.954
Now, initially I was.
521
00:23:11.628 --> 00:23:13.470
Because I didn't believe it, but I kept saying it.
522
00:23:13.850 --> 00:23:15.271
And I kept repeating it to my mind.
523
00:23:15.412 --> 00:23:18.454
I was teaching my mind a new narrative, a new paradigm.
524
00:23:19.515 --> 00:23:25.801
And then 10 days later, after my mom passed last year, one of my best friends, my dearest friend, Earl, passed away.
525
00:23:25.821 --> 00:23:26.882
He had brain cancer.
526
00:23:26.902 --> 00:23:29.405
He got diagnosed in January, died in June.
527
00:23:29.445 --> 00:23:31.707
I was at his bedside the day before he left.
528
00:23:32.267 --> 00:23:34.709
And I was very sad.
529
00:23:35.330 --> 00:23:37.371
But I can promise you the next day I felt grateful.
530
00:23:38.112 --> 00:23:40.573
I felt like, yeah, I'm terrific, but sad.
531
00:23:41.134 --> 00:23:41.914
I could be sad.
532
00:23:42.415 --> 00:23:44.696
I lost my friend and I miss him to this day.
533
00:23:44.716 --> 00:23:47.638
This guy, he was the funniest human being that I've ever known.
534
00:23:47.658 --> 00:23:49.900
And I miss him every single day, but I'm still terrific.
535
00:23:50.500 --> 00:23:51.200
I'm still wonderful.
536
00:23:51.220 --> 00:23:51.761
I'm grateful.
537
00:23:51.781 --> 00:23:54.082
I got, you know, 15 years of friendship with that guy.
538
00:23:54.902 --> 00:23:56.643
And, um, but I'm terrific.
539
00:23:57.203 --> 00:23:58.444
I'd never speak words.
540
00:23:58.464 --> 00:24:00.225
And you think about another thing that people do.
541
00:24:00.305 --> 00:24:00.745
How you doing?
542
00:24:01.505 --> 00:24:02.306
Yeah, I'm hanging in there.
543
00:24:03.046 --> 00:24:03.566
Oh God.
544
00:24:04.106 --> 00:24:07.428
Because you got one little problem or two little problems in your life, or maybe they're big problems.
545
00:24:07.528 --> 00:24:08.108
I'm hanging in there.
546
00:24:08.128 --> 00:24:09.509
When I get through this, then I'm going to be good.
547
00:24:09.549 --> 00:24:09.929
No, you won't.
548
00:24:10.169 --> 00:24:11.890
Because you're going to find something else to be through.
549
00:24:12.610 --> 00:24:12.931
Or I'm okay.
550
00:24:12.951 --> 00:24:13.191
Okay.
551
00:24:13.791 --> 00:24:19.975
Because you've got one thing in your mind, and God forbid you say, I'm terrific, when, you know, the day after your mom passed your dad.
552
00:24:20.015 --> 00:24:22.897
You could be sad, and you could be terrific, right?
553
00:24:22.917 --> 00:24:25.318
You've got a great life, but you've got a challenge.
554
00:24:25.338 --> 00:24:27.459
You've got to throw your whole life away because of a challenge?
555
00:24:27.519 --> 00:24:27.799
No.
556
00:24:28.740 --> 00:24:30.201
Don't speak the garbage.
557
00:24:30.761 --> 00:24:31.502
It's vile.
558
00:24:32.282 --> 00:24:32.602
Okay?
559
00:24:32.642 --> 00:24:33.183
Don't do it.
560
00:24:33.906 --> 00:24:38.129
because you're developing beliefs, you're developing paradigms, you are a self-fulfilling prophet.
561
00:24:38.690 --> 00:24:41.732
And I'm not talking about this rah-rah positive bullshit that people do.
562
00:24:42.392 --> 00:24:48.817
I'm talking about a system of repetition, a system of belief that you're developing and you're creating new paradigms.
563
00:24:48.877 --> 00:24:51.139
And once you get that paradigm,
564
00:24:51.858 --> 00:24:52.599
then you're going to live it.
565
00:24:52.779 --> 00:24:54.000
And I'm proof of that, man.
566
00:24:54.140 --> 00:24:57.463
And I'm telling you, every day I've got challenges as a business owner.
567
00:24:57.783 --> 00:25:01.186
And I was just talking to my team earlier today about something we've got to fix in the business.
568
00:25:01.286 --> 00:25:01.787
Okay, great.
569
00:25:01.807 --> 00:25:02.407
We'll get it fixed.
570
00:25:02.928 --> 00:25:06.691
I promise you, I'm the calmest guy in the world when we have a challenge in the business.
571
00:25:07.111 --> 00:25:08.853
And my team says, how do you stay so calm?
572
00:25:09.633 --> 00:25:14.317
When my book got pulled off Amazon because they thought we violated something, my team's freaking out.
573
00:25:14.337 --> 00:25:14.838
I'm like, guys,
574
00:25:15.831 --> 00:25:16.672
we'll get it back up there.
575
00:25:17.152 --> 00:25:23.337
It's obviously something, and we'll find out what they think we did, and we didn't do anything wrong.
576
00:25:23.357 --> 00:25:31.844
And it took us about eight weeks, six weeks, eight weeks to get it up there, and I didn't lose an ounce of happiness because I knew it would be, and the book was still flying off our shelves.
577
00:25:33.025 --> 00:25:35.567
Before we even done any PR, we sold 2,000 of these books.
578
00:25:35.607 --> 00:25:40.031
It's a really good book, and our clients are coming back and buying 10 copies, 15 copies.
579
00:25:40.051 --> 00:25:40.712
What does that tell you?
580
00:25:41.392 --> 00:25:49.382
So I said, guys, I love Amazon and it's a necessary tool, but this book's going to be successful with or without Amazon.
581
00:25:49.803 --> 00:25:50.704
That's my mindset.
582
00:25:50.824 --> 00:25:51.625
That's my paradigm.
583
00:25:52.591 --> 00:25:53.932
So you got to take a look at it, guys.
584
00:25:53.992 --> 00:25:56.815
And yeah, the same shit that you speak about every day, I'm okay.
585
00:25:57.736 --> 00:25:57.996
Yeah.
586
00:25:58.036 --> 00:25:58.376
Huh?
587
00:25:58.637 --> 00:25:58.777
Yeah.
588
00:25:58.797 --> 00:25:59.337
I'm good.
589
00:25:59.718 --> 00:26:00.338
Hanging in there.
590
00:26:01.039 --> 00:26:01.519
Oh God.
591
00:26:01.900 --> 00:26:02.260
Vomit.
592
00:26:02.360 --> 00:26:06.004
And when I hear people say that I'm going to vomit, I'm like, you're terrific, man.
593
00:26:06.244 --> 00:26:08.506
You've got to, you know, I tell my clients, look at your life.
594
00:26:09.187 --> 00:26:10.087
Your kids are healthy.
595
00:26:10.128 --> 00:26:10.788
You've got money.
596
00:26:10.808 --> 00:26:12.570
You've got, you know, you're better than that.
597
00:26:12.650 --> 00:26:15.352
Stop feeding that bullshit paradigm your mind every day.
598
00:26:16.073 --> 00:26:17.034
And that's the key, guys.
599
00:26:17.114 --> 00:26:18.416
So you've got to take stock.
600
00:26:18.776 --> 00:26:19.937
Life is an inside job.
601
00:26:20.518 --> 00:26:21.859
Just a recent episode on that.
602
00:26:22.740 --> 00:26:24.162
Hopefully you'll listen to that one as well.
603
00:26:24.542 --> 00:26:27.766
But I can tell you, guys, you change the paradigms through repetition.
604
00:26:27.826 --> 00:26:33.112
You identify a paradigm that might be limiting or not in line with what you want to leave.
605
00:26:33.132 --> 00:26:34.413
And it could be a belief as well.
606
00:26:35.114 --> 00:26:37.376
And you change a quick story like I did.
607
00:26:37.957 --> 00:26:39.238
Man, things go my way.
608
00:26:39.919 --> 00:26:41.740
Life is easy, right?
609
00:26:41.840 --> 00:26:42.641
I'm a lucky guy.
610
00:26:43.441 --> 00:26:46.063
And because I didn't believe it yet, I put a penny in my pocket.
611
00:26:46.123 --> 00:26:50.026
Now it's a gold coin that says luck magnet on there.
612
00:26:50.446 --> 00:26:54.329
And yes, when I play golf, it's my ballmark, unless there's a ball behind me, I'm using a flat one.
613
00:26:54.790 --> 00:26:55.650
But it's my ballmark.
614
00:26:55.910 --> 00:26:58.733
It's a constant reminder of the paradigm that I want to live.
615
00:26:58.753 --> 00:26:59.373
Right.
616
00:27:00.473 --> 00:27:02.934
And when you go back to that, you are a happy guy.
617
00:27:02.954 --> 00:27:04.814
You are a happy, you know, your life is easy.
618
00:27:04.854 --> 00:27:05.775
You are a lucky guy.
619
00:27:06.655 --> 00:27:08.235
And that's what we need to do.
620
00:27:08.995 --> 00:27:10.736
Your paradigms are not rigid.
621
00:27:10.956 --> 00:27:12.516
Your beliefs are not rigid.
622
00:27:13.216 --> 00:27:20.918
If you have one that's not in line with the life you want to live, the person you want to be, drop the ego, make changes.
623
00:27:20.938 --> 00:27:21.859
And that's another thing we do.
624
00:27:21.879 --> 00:27:23.919
We have ego, so we're going to guard ourselves, man.
625
00:27:24.399 --> 00:27:26.360
Yeah, there's just no good people out there anymore.
626
00:27:26.500 --> 00:27:27.120
Bullshit.
627
00:27:27.880 --> 00:27:30.804
There's somebody out there praying for somebody like you in a relationship.
628
00:27:31.424 --> 00:27:33.126
You've got to get yourself to that place.
629
00:27:33.647 --> 00:27:35.890
That place I call acceptance, that place of freedom.
630
00:27:36.611 --> 00:27:40.635
And your beliefs and paradigms have to match what you want or you're never going to experience it, guys.
631
00:27:41.116 --> 00:27:45.421
I can promise you, you never, you're defying universal energetic law.
632
00:27:45.761 --> 00:27:46.522
You can't do it.
633
00:27:47.223 --> 00:27:47.864
But guess what?
634
00:27:48.604 --> 00:27:56.149
When you change your paradigm, when you change your belief, when you get in a high vibrational state of being of acceptance, then it comes flying towards you.
635
00:27:56.370 --> 00:27:58.011
You can't not have what you want.
636
00:27:58.451 --> 00:28:04.736
We're living in this beautiful, wonderful, cooperative environment, this field of energy.
637
00:28:05.276 --> 00:28:06.457
that must obey you.
638
00:28:06.837 --> 00:28:08.018
It has to respond.
639
00:28:08.378 --> 00:28:19.546
So when you commit to your paradigms and changing those through repetition, your beliefs, changing those, like coming up with the belief like I did and like thousands of my clients have done, you're going to experience it.
640
00:28:19.666 --> 00:28:20.947
Your physical world will catch up.
641
00:28:20.947 --> 00:28:21.508
All right, guys.
642
00:28:21.528 --> 00:28:22.689
So I hope you enjoyed this episode.
643
00:28:22.709 --> 00:28:23.810
You better hit the like button.
644
00:28:24.250 --> 00:28:25.351
You better hit the share button.
645
00:28:25.631 --> 00:28:28.794
You better hit the subscribe button or I'll be at your door and I'll find you.
646
00:28:28.934 --> 00:28:29.495
No, I won't.
647
00:28:29.555 --> 00:28:30.476
How am I going to find you?
648
00:28:30.516 --> 00:28:31.076
I'm just kidding.
649
00:28:31.096 --> 00:28:32.838
But do it because it's good stuff.
650
00:28:33.359 --> 00:28:34.339
Do it because you learn.
651
00:28:34.440 --> 00:28:35.080
All right, guys.
652
00:28:35.140 --> 00:28:35.741
Coach Mike here.
653
00:28:35.761 --> 00:28:36.862
I'll see you in the next episode.
654
00:28:38.560 --> 00:28:39.742
All right, that's the episode.
655
00:28:39.902 --> 00:28:42.225
If something in there hit home with you, here's what to do.
656
00:28:42.665 --> 00:28:45.248
First, hit subscribe so you don't miss the next episode.
657
00:28:45.869 --> 00:28:55.501
Next, check out the show notes or YouTube description because my team puts all the links mentioned from today's episodes in there as well as ways we can help you beyond this episode.
1
00:00:00.171 --> 00:00:04.958
All right, on today's episode, we're going to talk about the invisible programs running your life.
2
00:00:05.619 --> 00:00:09.925
And until you address these and change these, nothing in your life's going to change, right?
3
00:00:11.026 --> 00:00:17.435
I'm Coach Mike Basfick, and this is the show for high performers who tried everything else and still can't quiet their own minds.
4
00:00:21.080 --> 00:00:22.481
Who am I and why should you listen to me?
5
00:00:22.501 --> 00:00:23.642
I'm Coach Mike Baszik.
6
00:00:23.682 --> 00:00:28.845
I'm the founder and creator of the Anxiety-Free Executive Program as part of my No Limous Nation.
7
00:00:28.865 --> 00:00:30.746
For the last 18 years, I've done nothing.
8
00:00:31.027 --> 00:00:35.990
Well, I've done other things, but I've done, I spent them helping high-performing professionals, right?
9
00:00:36.690 --> 00:00:42.054
Executives, successful people, eliminate, okay, all of the gremlins in their mind.
10
00:00:42.074 --> 00:00:45.857
The anxiety, the stress, the overwhelm, the imposter syndrome, the depression, you name it.
11
00:00:46.557 --> 00:00:54.185
We get rid of it so they could live the life, either enjoy the success they built or live a life at an entirely new level of success, right?
12
00:00:54.446 --> 00:01:01.653
And much of that work over the years is getting rid of those programmed patterns.
13
00:01:01.693 --> 00:01:08.360
I hate to use the word program because it's an overused self-help term, but it's getting rid of these patterns of behavior.
14
00:01:09.141 --> 00:01:11.342
And once we do that, then big things happen.
15
00:01:11.363 --> 00:01:14.384
And the patterns of behavior are what we call paradigms.
16
00:01:14.404 --> 00:01:15.205
Now, what's a paradigm?
17
00:01:15.225 --> 00:01:21.329
A paradigm is essentially how you see and what you expect from yourself and or the world.
18
00:01:21.369 --> 00:01:23.750
We have self paradigms, right?
19
00:01:23.790 --> 00:01:24.270
Who am I?
20
00:01:24.310 --> 00:01:25.051
What I'm capable of?
21
00:01:25.071 --> 00:01:25.991
I'm a shy person.
22
00:01:26.031 --> 00:01:26.752
I'm an introvert.
23
00:01:27.520 --> 00:01:30.261
I'm an extrovert and we have paradigms about the world.
24
00:01:30.281 --> 00:01:31.222
The world's a tough place.
25
00:01:31.822 --> 00:01:32.843
Life's tough, then you die.
26
00:01:32.863 --> 00:01:34.303
That was what I grew up with, right?
27
00:01:35.024 --> 00:01:36.785
And waiting for the other shoe to drop.
28
00:01:37.125 --> 00:01:40.506
And where do these paradigms come from, right?
29
00:01:40.546 --> 00:01:41.687
They come from our childhood.
30
00:01:41.747 --> 00:01:42.848
They come from society.
31
00:01:44.017 --> 00:01:50.284
I give you some really good examples in addition to the couple I gave you, but those paradigms are running your life.
32
00:01:51.465 --> 00:01:51.705
All right.
33
00:01:51.925 --> 00:01:52.806
Everything running your life.
34
00:01:52.826 --> 00:01:54.208
You're never going to do.
35
00:01:54.388 --> 00:01:55.309
There's some facts.
36
00:01:55.389 --> 00:01:57.351
There's some things that you have to understand here.
37
00:01:58.372 --> 00:02:06.080
If you understand anything about this world, anything about human behavior, anything about your mind, you're never going to outwork your state of being.
38
00:02:07.025 --> 00:02:13.489
If you've got a state of being of what I call resistance, inadequacy, insecurity, self-sabotage, look at my life.
39
00:02:13.589 --> 00:02:15.510
So, you know, you know my story.
40
00:02:15.550 --> 00:02:20.173
If you haven't, you should listen to these episodes and understand that I detail it.
41
00:02:20.233 --> 00:02:21.634
I book The Broken Sage, man.
42
00:02:21.674 --> 00:02:22.735
If you haven't gotten that book yet,
43
00:02:23.435 --> 00:02:24.416
What are you doing, man?
44
00:02:24.456 --> 00:02:25.337
What are you waiting for?
45
00:02:25.377 --> 00:02:28.860
This book, this freaking book is epic, man.
46
00:02:29.000 --> 00:02:30.421
And it's not because I wrote it.
47
00:02:31.362 --> 00:02:31.843
I lived it.
48
00:02:32.523 --> 00:02:37.628
And I've changed so many thousands of lives with the exact same formula in this book, starting with my own.
49
00:02:38.676 --> 00:02:49.318
But I can promise you, man, when I held on to these paradigms, but the states of being I was moving into, I was in a complete state of being from my conditioning, from my childhood, of inadequacy.
50
00:02:49.418 --> 00:02:51.939
I never thought I deserved success, so what did I do?
51
00:02:51.979 --> 00:02:53.919
I subconsciously self-sabotaged it.
52
00:02:54.419 --> 00:02:55.600
Can you relate to that one right?
53
00:02:55.900 --> 00:02:59.221
No matter how hard you work, no matter how much money comes in, it's always going out the door.
54
00:02:59.241 --> 00:03:05.302
No matter how nice of a person you are, no matter how great you are, you feel you are in relationships, man, you're always treated like shit.
55
00:03:06.165 --> 00:03:06.285
Right.
56
00:03:06.305 --> 00:03:10.050
And there's some successful, like really successful, like celebrities.
57
00:03:10.110 --> 00:03:10.350
Right.
58
00:03:10.871 --> 00:03:15.757
And you look at the relationships, they're a train wreck and, and they're interviewed and they say, well, I don't know.
59
00:03:15.777 --> 00:03:21.844
I, you know, I'm not sure why somewhere inside they're in a state of being that's not in harmony.
60
00:03:22.743 --> 00:03:23.844
with the outcome they want.
61
00:03:23.924 --> 00:03:29.829
So you're never going to outperform or outwork your current state of being and your conditioned states of being.
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You're never going to outperform a limiting belief, man.
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If you want to make a million dollars a year and you think that's impossible, you could grind and you can work and you can obsess and you could visualize, you could write pictures and have pictures all over the place and post-it notes and shit about you being a millionaire, you're never going to get it.
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If you don't believe it, you're never going to outwork and outperform a limiting belief.
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It's impossible.
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And you're never going to out, outlive, outperform, outdo a paradigm.
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A paradigm is where you see life, the way you see yourself.
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And that's what you're going to experience.
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So I tell my clients all the time that they're self-fulfilling prophets.
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What do I mean by that?
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It means very simply, what you expect to happen in your life is going to happen.
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Period.
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In the story, the physical world that we live in.
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is is not as real as you think it is all a byproduct of your inner world day after day after day after day what you believe will happen what you expect will happen happens like look at your life tell me that that's not true i'm not talking about what you want to happen right what you want to happen let's say you're single and you know that you're you're you're a good person you want to meet your soulmate
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But you're in a state of being of loneliness or lack or you go into.
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I remember when I was licking my wounds from my divorce and a subsequent relationship with a bunny and a pot girl, if you will.
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Right.
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You ever see what is it called?
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Fatal Attraction.
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She put the bunny in the pot.
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Well, this person I was in a relationship was pretty similar to that, the bunny in the pot girl.
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And I had to get out of it, but I was in a relationship for a while.
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And after that, man, I was licking my wounds.
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I'm like, oh my God, you know, the marriage, the divorce, this stuff.
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And I remember this like shopping in Target and everybody else seemed to be coupled up with me.
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I'd go to parties and everybody else had a couple except for I was a single guy, right?
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And I wasn't a bar guy.
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I wasn't going to go out and meet girls and stuff.
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But, man, I just wanted a relationship.
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I'm a family guy.
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I'm not that guy that's going to be out there and just dating and one after another.
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I'm, you know, and Kelly and I have a wonderful relationship.
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And, you know, I'm a lucky guy.
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But...
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I am a lucky guy because I changed my paradigm to believe I'm a lucky guy.
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And I'll tell you that story in a minute.
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But I was always in that state, like, you know, in that belief that, man, there's no good ones out there anymore.
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Relationships are tough.
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And I had that life, like, but I had to change that.
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Yeah.
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But my life to that point is where all that shit came from, and I need to change.
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So today, you know, we've talked about the state of being, and we'll talk about the state of being again, ad nauseum.
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And I lay all this out, chapter 13 in the book, all about paradigms, all about limiting beliefs, man, and the exact form of how to change them, which we're going to talk about today.
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But everything you are today is a byproduct of everything you've been through and the way you were raised, man, your childhood.
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So your political views, your views, like I always tell my clients, racists aren't born.
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They're conditioned.
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Everything's conditioned.
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If you think relationships are tough, that's learned behavior.
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If you think relationships are easy, that's learned behavior.
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If you think life is tough, learned behavior.
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Life is easy, learned behavior.
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It's a paradigm.
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And it's all because of your upbringing, your state of being, and what you've experienced.
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And now you've developed those rigid beliefs, but they're just not true.
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And you've got to take a look at like, okay, is this paradigm, is this belief serving me or is it not?
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And if it isn't, then you've got to do something about it.
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Well, since it's learned behavior through repetition, then maybe we can unlearn it and do something different.
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Wouldn't that make sense?
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A lot more fun that way, right?
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So think about some of the global paradigms we have.
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And every one of these things you'll relate to.
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We say, waiting for the other shoe to drop, right?
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That's where life's tough and then you die.
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Don't trust anybody, man.
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Don't get too confident.
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Life has a way of kicking you in the ass when you're too high.
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And how do we know that?
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Because we've experienced it.
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We expect it.
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And then we experience it.
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I don't like Mondays.
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Right?
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Mondays.
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Poor Mondays get a bad rap.
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I love Mondays.
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I love Tuesdays.
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I love every day.
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I'm, yeah.
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I'm not one of those like rah-rah positive speak guys.
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I hate that shit.
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Okay?
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But I am a happy guy.
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I wasn't a happy guy.
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Man, I was deep down in it.
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Now, as a young person, when I was, you know, prior to learning this work, I had a lot of wonderful moments in my life.
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I was a fun, happy guy.
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Yeah.
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But inside, I was a frickin' volcano, man, waiting to erupt.
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I never felt comfortable.
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I never was like, I'd used humor at that time as a distraction.
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I was like, at times, man, I was, you know, nutty.
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And I just, I would have fun, man.
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And, but then when that fun was over, I'd go back to that dread.
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I didn't trust, man.
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Peace was an imposter.
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Peace was like suspicious.
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I never trusted peace.
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And because I was always waiting for you to shoot your job.
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Why?
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Because that's what I was taught.
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And that's what I would experience.
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And I would make stupid ass mistakes, but all the paradigms would play out in my life.
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And at that point, I not only hated Mondays, Sunday afternoon, dread would kick in.
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And that was learned behavior.
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That was my paradigm, right?
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But think about it.
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I don't like Mondays.
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They wrote songs about
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The Bengals wrote Manic Monday.
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Who wrote I Don't Like Mondays, that song, back in the 80s?
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And everybody, like, talks about Mondays.
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Oh, must be a Monday.
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I got a case of the Mondays, right?
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And then, God, thank God it's Friday.
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Right.
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We've been taught.
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Thank God it's Friday, man.
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I can't wait to get to the weekend living for the weekend.
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Right.
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That's a song.
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TGIF.
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There's a whole frickin restaurant brand.
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Thank God it's Friday.
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Why?
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Because we're so miserable during the week because work sucks.
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That's what we're taught.
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That's a paradigm.
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Right.
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You've got to be you got to work your ass off for success.
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You've got to pay the price for success.
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You've got to never rest.
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Don't grind.
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Someone else is out grinding all ridiculous paradigms.
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that aren't serving you.
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They're just literally building up.
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Now you should work hard.
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You should put the time in, no question, but it's a paradigm, right?
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If I say the age of 65, paradigm says retirement.
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Talk to the guy that retired at 48 or the woman that retired at 50, right?
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They must not have believed the paradigm.
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I'm going to retire early, right?
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18, oh, let's vote.
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21, now I'm an
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It's all paradigms, man.
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And we're like, as soon as you meet somebody, how old are you?
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Right.
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We want to go to age.
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Oh, you're eight.
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Oh my God.
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You're, you're 50.
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Yeah.
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Life, you know, this 50s, new 30 or, or whatever.
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Okay.
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It's we're, we're littered with paradigms.
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Right.
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And I, I just don't, I don't trust relationships.
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I don't, uh, money is hard.
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I think about the paradigms over money.
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that we're taught, man.
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Money is the root of all evil.
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You know, you've got to work hard for money.
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Don't trust people.
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If it's free, it's too good to be free.
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This podcast is free.
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All right, there's no strings attached here, man.
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Yeah, we want you to, if you need help, to reach out to us.
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And of course, we'll talk about that, but it's free.
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There's no strings attached here.
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You don't even have to opt in to anything.
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You just hit play and listen.
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So maybe it's not too good if something's free.
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But we're taught that way, and we're taught don't trust.
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And families, how many millions of families are broken up over the estate?
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I've got a lot of financial advisors in my program.
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I hear these horror stories all the time, and I've seen these horror stories all the time.
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And these families just break up, man, over money and bullshit.
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And people lose their effing mind.
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Dateline, watch the Dateline episodes, right?
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And 90% of them are over money.
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Money or affairs, but even the affairs are usually tied into money.
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But it's always money.
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And that's a paradigm, man.
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But money is energy like anything else.
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So what if money just flowed?
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What if money was easy?
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And as soon as I say, man, money's easy, it could flow.
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You can make whatever you'd like to make, or you can have that dream life.
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Right away, your mind goes, no, you can't.
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No, you can't, because I've been there.
250
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I've done it.
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And you hang on to those freaking paradigms and hang on to those freaking beliefs like they're gospel.
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They're not.
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They're learned behavior.
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So you've got to start changing the paradigm, right?
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And think more about money.
256
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You know, look at who the bad person is, right?
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And every Disney movie ever made, not every Disney movie ever made, but you think about the villain.
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It's always the wealthy person.
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It's always the king or the prince or, you know, I think Cruella de Vil in 101 Dalmatians, I think she had a ton of money.
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And how about It's a Wonderful Life?
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In my opinion, probably the finest Christmas movie ever made.
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There's a biopic coming out on Jimmy Stewart, and it's centered around that movie, like his after the war and how he was battling depression, and he made that movie.
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Can't wait to see it.
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There's another one.
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I play Rocky coming out.
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My God, I'm excited for that because Rocky...
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This guy was living in his car.
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He had no money.
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He had to sell his dog.
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The dog you see in Rocky, that was a dog he sold.
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And he bought the dog back.
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And they offered him $250,000 for that script.
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And he said, no, I play Rocky.
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That's the thing.
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And he wouldn't sell it.
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And look what happened there.
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Anyway, I digress.
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But you look at It's a Wonderful Life.
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And Mr. Potter...
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The richest guy in town, the biggest jag in town, the prick, right?
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The villain, you know, Mr. Potter, gets his dirty little grubby fingers on it, as George Bailey said.
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But we've been conditioned to think that money is a certain thing.
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Well, talk to successful people.
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Talk to philanthropists.
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Talk to people that have money and give money and volunteer their time and do good with that money.
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They would say money's easy, man.
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It's a paradigm.
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It's a belief.
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And if you want more money, then you've got to change your paradigm.
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If you want better relationships or a relationship in general, you've got to change your belief.
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You've got to change your paradigm.
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If you want to start thinking that life is easy, then you better change.
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And how do we do all that?
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We do it the same way that we did the first thing.
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We've got to change what we're feeding our mind.
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The repetitious statements, the dialogue, the stories.
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We've got to start changing that stuff.
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I was talking to a client yesterday.
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And she's in the program, just got here.
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She's new in our community.
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But...
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You know, she's so glued to her circumstances, man, and her relationship that's not great and her finances that are so-so.
303
00:14:06.873 --> 00:14:10.115
And she just grew up with this tremendous...
304
00:14:11.271 --> 00:14:12.691
Um, inadequacy, right?
305
00:14:12.731 --> 00:14:22.554
Family was what they would call a broken family and just had a little wonderful person, great personality, um, good looking human being.
306
00:14:23.234 --> 00:14:24.874
And yet feels completely inadequate.
307
00:14:25.815 --> 00:14:27.815
Uh, like, like she doesn't deserve anything.
308
00:14:29.075 --> 00:14:31.216
And so I said, are you doing the work?
309
00:14:31.496 --> 00:14:33.396
Yeah, but I said, yeah, but what?
310
00:14:33.756 --> 00:14:34.837
Yeah, but I'm still sad.
311
00:14:35.297 --> 00:14:37.537
Yeah, but I still, uh, am experiencing lack.
312
00:14:37.577 --> 00:14:39.718
Yeah, but I'm still like, don't know what to do here.
313
00:14:40.798 --> 00:14:42.679
And I said, well, have you made any progress yet?
314
00:14:43.479 --> 00:14:45.860
And she says, I have, but I said, stop the but.
315
00:14:46.420 --> 00:14:48.061
Everything after but is white noise to me.
316
00:14:48.601 --> 00:14:49.822
Have you made progress?
317
00:14:50.322 --> 00:14:50.562
Yes.
318
00:14:50.582 --> 00:14:53.743
I said, what if you start changing the words that you're speaking?
319
00:14:54.264 --> 00:14:59.046
Because the words you're speaking are you're speaking it to your subconscious mind, and the subconscious mind becomes it.
320
00:14:59.966 --> 00:15:01.007
Yeah, but I'm still sad.
321
00:15:01.067 --> 00:15:01.648
Subconscious mind.
322
00:15:01.668 --> 00:15:02.849
I said, sure, I'll give you more sadness.
323
00:15:02.869 --> 00:15:04.430
Remember what I talked about in that episode?
324
00:15:04.991 --> 00:15:07.794
The subconscious mind has no opinion, has no judgment.
325
00:15:08.154 --> 00:15:11.938
It's going to do what you consistently train it to do and what you believe about yourself.
326
00:15:13.099 --> 00:15:18.844
So this person just believes that it's difficult to get rid of it and believes that that's their lot in life.
327
00:15:19.765 --> 00:15:22.548
And I said, well, what if you start saying that you're terrific every day?
328
00:15:22.568 --> 00:15:23.509
So I don't want to lie.
329
00:15:23.549 --> 00:15:24.049
I said, why?
330
00:15:24.069 --> 00:15:24.149
Why?
331
00:15:24.925 --> 00:15:26.466
You lied your entire life.
332
00:15:27.186 --> 00:15:28.447
You're a fine human being.
333
00:15:28.487 --> 00:15:29.388
You're a good person.
334
00:15:29.408 --> 00:15:30.888
You've got good morals, good character.
335
00:15:31.249 --> 00:15:32.089
You're hardworking.
336
00:15:32.389 --> 00:15:33.510
You keep yourself in shape.
337
00:15:33.530 --> 00:15:36.351
You're doing everything right that you believe in life.
338
00:15:36.872 --> 00:15:38.793
But you kept telling yourself that you're no good.
339
00:15:39.713 --> 00:15:41.474
And you kept telling your mind that you're no good.
340
00:15:41.494 --> 00:15:43.535
You kept obsessing about your mistakes.
341
00:15:43.555 --> 00:15:44.936
You kept revisiting your mistakes.
342
00:15:45.417 --> 00:15:47.478
And you kept keep that dialogue going.
343
00:15:49.045 --> 00:15:50.126
And it wasn't true.
344
00:15:50.926 --> 00:15:53.148
You can make a mistake and still be a great person.
345
00:15:53.708 --> 00:15:54.889
Every person makes mistakes.
346
00:15:54.969 --> 00:15:56.189
I was the king of making mistakes.
347
00:15:56.229 --> 00:15:57.350
Deep down, I was a good person.
348
00:15:57.370 --> 00:15:58.270
I was a good person.
349
00:15:58.290 --> 00:16:01.072
I was doing really stupid things back in resistance.
350
00:16:02.253 --> 00:16:03.813
And you kept telling yourself that story.
351
00:16:03.833 --> 00:16:05.054
You kept telling yourself that story.
352
00:16:05.074 --> 00:16:06.055
Were you telling the truth?
353
00:16:07.375 --> 00:16:08.176
And she says, well, no.
354
00:16:08.556 --> 00:16:12.819
I said, well, that's how you got to the paradigms and the beliefs you got to now and the states of being.
355
00:16:12.859 --> 00:16:14.700
So how about this story?
356
00:16:14.740 --> 00:16:15.640
Are you getting better?
357
00:16:15.680 --> 00:16:17.561
Have you, are you better than you were last week?
358
00:16:17.641 --> 00:16:18.122
She says, yep.
359
00:16:19.002 --> 00:16:21.023
I said, are you better than you were two weeks ago?
360
00:16:21.524 --> 00:16:23.345
Even every, she says, I am.
361
00:16:23.965 --> 00:16:25.086
I said, so how about this?
362
00:16:26.427 --> 00:16:30.029
When I ask you how the work's going, it's going well and I'm getting better every day.
363
00:16:31.058 --> 00:16:35.040
So you start teaching your mind that every day, and guess what the mind's going to do?
364
00:16:35.661 --> 00:16:37.061
Okay, we're getting better every day.
365
00:16:37.401 --> 00:16:38.262
Getting better every day.
366
00:16:38.322 --> 00:16:40.063
The mind is the machine that runs you.
367
00:16:40.163 --> 00:16:41.604
I know you think that your mind is you.
368
00:16:41.644 --> 00:16:42.064
It's not.
369
00:16:42.884 --> 00:16:46.146
It's a machine that runs you based on the training you've given it.
370
00:16:46.746 --> 00:16:52.630
So everything that's housed in there, your beliefs, the words you speak, your paradigms, your states of being—
371
00:16:53.490 --> 00:16:58.472
Everything that you're experiencing in your life that's playing on your physical world, it's all learned behavior.
372
00:16:59.012 --> 00:17:00.112
So we've got to teach it in a way.
373
00:17:00.252 --> 00:17:01.253
So how about that story?
374
00:17:01.993 --> 00:17:03.793
She said, okay, I can buy into that story.
375
00:17:04.333 --> 00:17:05.574
So how's the work going?
376
00:17:05.734 --> 00:17:05.974
Good.
377
00:17:06.454 --> 00:17:07.434
I'm getting better every day.
378
00:17:07.454 --> 00:17:10.575
I said, you should walk around saying that all day long.
379
00:17:11.076 --> 00:17:14.857
And anything else, if you think relationships are tough, find examples.
380
00:17:15.497 --> 00:17:15.737
Right?
381
00:17:15.837 --> 00:17:17.178
Show your subconscious mind.
382
00:17:17.198 --> 00:17:18.298
Well, look at that relationship.
383
00:17:18.318 --> 00:17:18.938
That's a good one.
384
00:17:19.458 --> 00:17:20.439
Look at that relationship.
385
00:17:20.459 --> 00:17:20.999
That's a good one.
386
00:17:21.319 --> 00:17:24.780
You know, I said, I was at one of my live events last year.
387
00:17:24.800 --> 00:17:26.961
We got together with the group after the event.
388
00:17:27.801 --> 00:17:31.302
And this woman came up to me that's a longtime client.
389
00:17:31.823 --> 00:17:40.145
And she goes, Mike, I marvel at you and Kelly of how much you love each other and how, like, dynamic you guys are and all that stuff.
390
00:17:40.185 --> 00:17:40.786
And she goes, man...
391
00:17:42.106 --> 00:17:43.628
She goes, I envy that.
392
00:17:44.489 --> 00:17:51.015
And I said, yeah, you should have seen me 20 years ago when I couldn't, you know, sustain a good relationship.
393
00:17:51.075 --> 00:17:53.698
And I, you know, and I said, it's all learned behavior.
394
00:17:54.238 --> 00:17:57.602
I had to change me in order to have relationships like I have now.
395
00:17:58.377 --> 00:17:59.598
I had to change my state of being.
396
00:17:59.618 --> 00:18:00.499
I had to change my beliefs.
397
00:18:00.519 --> 00:18:01.519
I had to change my paradigms.
398
00:18:01.559 --> 00:18:03.161
That's the key to this whole deal, guys.
399
00:18:03.941 --> 00:18:09.105
Everyone's living in the circumstances, even though the circumstances are a byproduct of the person you've been up to this point.
400
00:18:09.905 --> 00:18:10.746
So you got a choice now.
401
00:18:10.966 --> 00:18:12.808
Stay consumed by the circumstances.
402
00:18:13.208 --> 00:18:14.549
Keep living in it like I was.
403
00:18:14.649 --> 00:18:16.550
Read chapter four on the Broken Sage, guys.
404
00:18:16.710 --> 00:18:17.751
Read chapter four.
405
00:18:18.272 --> 00:18:19.713
You'll be like, man, this guy was a shit show.
406
00:18:20.273 --> 00:18:22.075
But I was consumed with my circumstances.
407
00:18:22.796 --> 00:18:25.399
And everything that happened up to that point in my entire life.
408
00:18:26.240 --> 00:18:30.606
And then when I realized life was an inside job, then I started to change all that stuff.
409
00:18:30.646 --> 00:18:31.827
And I changed the paradigms.
410
00:18:32.688 --> 00:18:34.531
And I just taught my mind with repetition.
411
00:18:34.551 --> 00:18:38.516
Now, one thing I had to go through, so every month it was a struggle to survive at that point.
412
00:18:39.860 --> 00:18:42.383
And every month I'd be like, man, I don't know how I'm going to make it.
413
00:18:42.403 --> 00:18:45.065
But then I realized I make it every month.
414
00:18:45.666 --> 00:18:46.627
I figure out a way.
415
00:18:47.107 --> 00:18:47.888
I get creative.
416
00:18:47.908 --> 00:18:50.090
I do whatever I have to do, but I figure out a way.
417
00:18:50.751 --> 00:18:53.954
And as I started to do this work and my mind started to clear, I had this thought one day.
418
00:18:54.975 --> 00:18:56.556
I went from I struggle every month.
419
00:18:56.596 --> 00:18:57.217
It's a struggle.
420
00:18:57.277 --> 00:18:57.817
Life's tough.
421
00:18:58.701 --> 00:19:02.766
I went to, I started to realize that, man, you, you, you make it every month.
422
00:19:02.786 --> 00:19:04.748
You figured out, so way not change that story.
423
00:19:05.809 --> 00:19:07.812
Like, Hey, you always find a way.
424
00:19:08.532 --> 00:19:13.839
So my consistent belief paradigm started to be like, you know, you always find a way.
425
00:19:14.379 --> 00:19:16.121
So every time my mind threw that up to me,
426
00:19:16.862 --> 00:19:18.103
I would accept my state of being.
427
00:19:19.103 --> 00:19:21.464
And then I would say, you know, you always find a way.
428
00:19:22.024 --> 00:19:22.405
That's all right.
429
00:19:22.425 --> 00:19:23.005
We'll find a way.
430
00:19:23.025 --> 00:19:23.605
We always do.
431
00:19:24.405 --> 00:19:25.386
Everything always works out.
432
00:19:25.586 --> 00:19:26.206
It always does.
433
00:19:26.887 --> 00:19:28.627
And I said it a thousand times a day.
434
00:19:29.268 --> 00:19:32.849
I'd walk around like, yeah, every time my mind would say, oh my God, Mike, get that bill coming.
435
00:19:32.869 --> 00:19:33.209
You got that.
436
00:19:33.249 --> 00:19:33.950
You got child support.
437
00:19:33.970 --> 00:19:34.290
You got that.
438
00:19:34.850 --> 00:19:35.070
Yeah.
439
00:19:35.511 --> 00:19:36.151
I always find a way.
440
00:19:36.891 --> 00:19:37.471
I always find a way.
441
00:19:38.032 --> 00:19:38.532
And guess what?
442
00:19:39.252 --> 00:19:39.993
I always found a way.
443
00:19:40.733 --> 00:19:43.214
And I was a self-fulfilling prophet.
444
00:19:43.234 --> 00:19:44.735
Then things started to go my way.
445
00:19:45.650 --> 00:19:46.550
little bit by little bit.
446
00:19:47.171 --> 00:19:48.031
And I thought, you know what?
447
00:19:48.871 --> 00:19:49.872
Everything goes my way.
448
00:19:50.752 --> 00:19:51.432
Everything's fine.
449
00:19:51.472 --> 00:19:53.433
Everything's gonna be okay.
450
00:19:53.553 --> 00:19:55.694
And now I said, no, I said, things started to go my way.
451
00:19:56.774 --> 00:19:58.695
And everything works out.
452
00:19:58.875 --> 00:20:07.799
There's a sign right behind me that I picked up at Pier 1 in like 2007 that says, not to spoil the ending, but everything's gonna be fine.
453
00:20:08.699 --> 00:20:12.721
And I started to train my mind that obsessively all day long, I'd walk around saying it.
454
00:20:13.681 --> 00:20:20.087
And then things continued to go my way and I started to get some good luck and I was doing this work obsessively.
455
00:20:20.568 --> 00:20:24.131
Stuff I teach all my clients now and everything was getting better and better.
456
00:20:24.932 --> 00:20:27.334
I said, you know, life's getting easier.
457
00:20:28.095 --> 00:20:28.876
I started that one.
458
00:20:29.416 --> 00:20:30.677
I said, things are going my way.
459
00:20:31.678 --> 00:20:34.200
And I started to get lucky and I'm a lucky guy.
460
00:20:35.382 --> 00:20:38.725
And I put a penny in my pocket as a reminder of my new paradigm.
461
00:20:39.435 --> 00:20:40.055
And I'm a lucky guy.
462
00:20:40.075 --> 00:20:42.316
And I'd walk around all day like, man, life is easy.
463
00:20:42.996 --> 00:20:43.496
I'm blessed.
464
00:20:43.536 --> 00:20:44.836
I'm so grateful for this life.
465
00:20:45.716 --> 00:20:47.916
Things go my way and I'm a lucky guy.
466
00:20:48.497 --> 00:20:49.517
Now, am I lucky every day?
467
00:20:49.577 --> 00:20:51.077
No, but I'm blessed every day.
468
00:20:51.617 --> 00:20:53.197
I have been since then.
469
00:20:53.217 --> 00:20:53.878
You know why?
470
00:20:53.918 --> 00:20:58.558
Because I've got a beautiful, wonderful wife that is healthy and I'm healthy.
471
00:20:58.598 --> 00:21:00.459
My kids are, our kids are healthy, five kids.
472
00:21:00.479 --> 00:21:02.459
We've got, we've got challenges.
473
00:21:02.499 --> 00:21:03.159
I run a business.
474
00:21:03.179 --> 00:21:04.399
We've got live, we've got five kids.
475
00:21:04.419 --> 00:21:05.800
We've got challenges like everyone else.
476
00:21:05.860 --> 00:21:07.480
You're never gonna be void of challenges.
477
00:21:08.600 --> 00:21:11.282
But I just said that over and over and over again.
478
00:21:12.023 --> 00:21:16.846
And even when I met Kelly, we were driving to a concert one time, she says, we're never gonna find parking.
479
00:21:16.866 --> 00:21:19.467
I said, Kel, things work out for me, I'm a lucky guy.
480
00:21:19.487 --> 00:21:23.050
And she laughed and we got the parking right out front and she said, man,
481
00:21:23.750 --> 00:21:25.791
and to this day, I carry this coin.
482
00:21:25.931 --> 00:21:35.113
Those are on video, see it, but it says no limits on the front and luck magnet on the back, and that's my reminder of my paradigm, right, and that's essentially what it is, guys.
483
00:21:35.133 --> 00:21:42.655
It doesn't take this act of God or, you know, EMDR or shock therapy to change a belief and change a paradigm.
484
00:21:43.215 --> 00:21:45.876
It takes repetition, and I know when you say it,
485
00:21:46.805 --> 00:21:47.646
you're not going to believe it.
486
00:21:47.907 --> 00:21:50.150
If you're overwhelmed and say, you know, my schedule's easier.
487
00:21:50.851 --> 00:21:51.672
Life's getting easier.
488
00:21:51.712 --> 00:21:53.014
Your mind's going to say, no, it's not.
489
00:21:53.595 --> 00:21:54.315
You're full of shit.
490
00:21:54.356 --> 00:21:55.036
Mine did too.
491
00:21:56.118 --> 00:21:59.963
But your mind is taking direction from you, so it's only doing what you trained it to do.
492
00:22:00.784 --> 00:22:02.046
Start to train it another way.
493
00:22:02.947 --> 00:22:03.748
And that's what I did.
494
00:22:04.188 --> 00:22:08.250
And I walked around obsessively, you know, man, things are going my way.
495
00:22:08.990 --> 00:22:09.671
Life is easy.
496
00:22:09.691 --> 00:22:10.291
I love life.
497
00:22:11.192 --> 00:22:14.653
And, um, I'm a lucky guy and I have been, I've been blessed.
498
00:22:14.673 --> 00:22:16.014
This is my final day on earth.
499
00:22:16.694 --> 00:22:18.055
I got more to do, so let's hope not.
500
00:22:18.475 --> 00:22:21.797
But, um, I've been a lucky guy and everything.
501
00:22:21.857 --> 00:22:22.337
I'm blessed.
502
00:22:22.417 --> 00:22:24.018
And that's the perspective I've developed.
503
00:22:24.038 --> 00:22:26.360
And I've had challenges in my life, just like anyone else.
504
00:22:26.980 --> 00:22:30.722
And I moved through those challenges and I, and I'm just so grateful and blessed that
505
00:22:30.982 --> 00:22:31.502
for this life.
506
00:22:32.303 --> 00:22:39.226
And when you read the book, um, when you hear my story in detail, you'll say, you know, he had bad luck because that was what I believed.
507
00:22:39.706 --> 00:22:40.607
That was my paradigm.
508
00:22:41.347 --> 00:22:44.569
So that's my, you know, my transformation to this work.
509
00:22:45.149 --> 00:22:49.391
And I said, you're never going to hear me speak words that are not in line with that.
510
00:22:49.431 --> 00:22:53.513
Last year, you know, I lost my mom and she was older.
511
00:22:54.047 --> 00:22:54.167
Right.
512
00:22:54.187 --> 00:22:55.087
And it was her time.
513
00:22:55.808 --> 00:22:56.888
And it was very sad.
514
00:22:58.029 --> 00:23:00.029
But the next day when someone said, Mike, how you doing?
515
00:23:00.049 --> 00:23:00.650
It's terrific.
516
00:23:01.330 --> 00:23:02.010
How you doing, man?
517
00:23:02.110 --> 00:23:02.470
Wonderful.
518
00:23:02.490 --> 00:23:05.712
You're never going to hear me speak words that I don't want to live.
519
00:23:06.552 --> 00:23:09.653
And I believe when I say, I'm not just pretend saying I'm terrific.
520
00:23:09.693 --> 00:23:10.954
Now, initially I was.
521
00:23:11.628 --> 00:23:13.470
Because I didn't believe it, but I kept saying it.
522
00:23:13.850 --> 00:23:15.271
And I kept repeating it to my mind.
523
00:23:15.412 --> 00:23:18.454
I was teaching my mind a new narrative, a new paradigm.
524
00:23:19.515 --> 00:23:25.801
And then 10 days later, after my mom passed last year, one of my best friends, my dearest friend, Earl, passed away.
525
00:23:25.821 --> 00:23:26.882
He had brain cancer.
526
00:23:26.902 --> 00:23:29.405
He got diagnosed in January, died in June.
527
00:23:29.445 --> 00:23:31.707
I was at his bedside the day before he left.
528
00:23:32.267 --> 00:23:34.709
And I was very sad.
529
00:23:35.330 --> 00:23:37.371
But I can promise you the next day I felt grateful.
530
00:23:38.112 --> 00:23:40.573
I felt like, yeah, I'm terrific, but sad.
531
00:23:41.134 --> 00:23:41.914
I could be sad.
532
00:23:42.415 --> 00:23:44.696
I lost my friend and I miss him to this day.
533
00:23:44.716 --> 00:23:47.638
This guy, he was the funniest human being that I've ever known.
534
00:23:47.658 --> 00:23:49.900
And I miss him every single day, but I'm still terrific.
535
00:23:50.500 --> 00:23:51.200
I'm still wonderful.
536
00:23:51.220 --> 00:23:51.761
I'm grateful.
537
00:23:51.781 --> 00:23:54.082
I got, you know, 15 years of friendship with that guy.
538
00:23:54.902 --> 00:23:56.643
And, um, but I'm terrific.
539
00:23:57.203 --> 00:23:58.444
I'd never speak words.
540
00:23:58.464 --> 00:24:00.225
And you think about another thing that people do.
541
00:24:00.305 --> 00:24:00.745
How you doing?
542
00:24:01.505 --> 00:24:02.306
Yeah, I'm hanging in there.
543
00:24:03.046 --> 00:24:03.566
Oh God.
544
00:24:04.106 --> 00:24:07.428
Because you got one little problem or two little problems in your life, or maybe they're big problems.
545
00:24:07.528 --> 00:24:08.108
I'm hanging in there.
546
00:24:08.128 --> 00:24:09.509
When I get through this, then I'm going to be good.
547
00:24:09.549 --> 00:24:09.929
No, you won't.
548
00:24:10.169 --> 00:24:11.890
Because you're going to find something else to be through.
549
00:24:12.610 --> 00:24:12.931
Or I'm okay.
550
00:24:12.951 --> 00:24:13.191
Okay.
551
00:24:13.791 --> 00:24:19.975
Because you've got one thing in your mind, and God forbid you say, I'm terrific, when, you know, the day after your mom passed your dad.
552
00:24:20.015 --> 00:24:22.897
You could be sad, and you could be terrific, right?
553
00:24:22.917 --> 00:24:25.318
You've got a great life, but you've got a challenge.
554
00:24:25.338 --> 00:24:27.459
You've got to throw your whole life away because of a challenge?
555
00:24:27.519 --> 00:24:27.799
No.
556
00:24:28.740 --> 00:24:30.201
Don't speak the garbage.
557
00:24:30.761 --> 00:24:31.502
It's vile.
558
00:24:32.282 --> 00:24:32.602
Okay?
559
00:24:32.642 --> 00:24:33.183
Don't do it.
560
00:24:33.906 --> 00:24:38.129
because you're developing beliefs, you're developing paradigms, you are a self-fulfilling prophet.
561
00:24:38.690 --> 00:24:41.732
And I'm not talking about this rah-rah positive bullshit that people do.
562
00:24:42.392 --> 00:24:48.817
I'm talking about a system of repetition, a system of belief that you're developing and you're creating new paradigms.
563
00:24:48.877 --> 00:24:51.139
And once you get that paradigm,
564
00:24:51.858 --> 00:24:52.599
then you're going to live it.
565
00:24:52.779 --> 00:24:54.000
And I'm proof of that, man.
566
00:24:54.140 --> 00:24:57.463
And I'm telling you, every day I've got challenges as a business owner.
567
00:24:57.783 --> 00:25:01.186
And I was just talking to my team earlier today about something we've got to fix in the business.
568
00:25:01.286 --> 00:25:01.787
Okay, great.
569
00:25:01.807 --> 00:25:02.407
We'll get it fixed.
570
00:25:02.928 --> 00:25:06.691
I promise you, I'm the calmest guy in the world when we have a challenge in the business.
571
00:25:07.111 --> 00:25:08.853
And my team says, how do you stay so calm?
572
00:25:09.633 --> 00:25:14.317
When my book got pulled off Amazon because they thought we violated something, my team's freaking out.
573
00:25:14.337 --> 00:25:14.838
I'm like, guys,
574
00:25:15.831 --> 00:25:16.672
we'll get it back up there.
575
00:25:17.152 --> 00:25:23.337
It's obviously something, and we'll find out what they think we did, and we didn't do anything wrong.
576
00:25:23.357 --> 00:25:31.844
And it took us about eight weeks, six weeks, eight weeks to get it up there, and I didn't lose an ounce of happiness because I knew it would be, and the book was still flying off our shelves.
577
00:25:33.025 --> 00:25:35.567
Before we even done any PR, we sold 2,000 of these books.
578
00:25:35.607 --> 00:25:40.031
It's a really good book, and our clients are coming back and buying 10 copies, 15 copies.
579
00:25:40.051 --> 00:25:40.712
What does that tell you?
580
00:25:41.392 --> 00:25:49.382
So I said, guys, I love Amazon and it's a necessary tool, but this book's going to be successful with or without Amazon.
581
00:25:49.803 --> 00:25:50.704
That's my mindset.
582
00:25:50.824 --> 00:25:51.625
That's my paradigm.
583
00:25:52.591 --> 00:25:53.932
So you got to take a look at it, guys.
584
00:25:53.992 --> 00:25:56.815
And yeah, the same shit that you speak about every day, I'm okay.
585
00:25:57.736 --> 00:25:57.996
Yeah.
586
00:25:58.036 --> 00:25:58.376
Huh?
587
00:25:58.637 --> 00:25:58.777
Yeah.
588
00:25:58.797 --> 00:25:59.337
I'm good.
589
00:25:59.718 --> 00:26:00.338
Hanging in there.
590
00:26:01.039 --> 00:26:01.519
Oh God.
591
00:26:01.900 --> 00:26:02.260
Vomit.
592
00:26:02.360 --> 00:26:06.004
And when I hear people say that I'm going to vomit, I'm like, you're terrific, man.
593
00:26:06.244 --> 00:26:08.506
You've got to, you know, I tell my clients, look at your life.
594
00:26:09.187 --> 00:26:10.087
Your kids are healthy.
595
00:26:10.128 --> 00:26:10.788
You've got money.
596
00:26:10.808 --> 00:26:12.570
You've got, you know, you're better than that.
597
00:26:12.650 --> 00:26:15.352
Stop feeding that bullshit paradigm your mind every day.
598
00:26:16.073 --> 00:26:17.034
And that's the key, guys.
599
00:26:17.114 --> 00:26:18.416
So you've got to take stock.
600
00:26:18.776 --> 00:26:19.937
Life is an inside job.
601
00:26:20.518 --> 00:26:21.859
Just a recent episode on that.
602
00:26:22.740 --> 00:26:24.162
Hopefully you'll listen to that one as well.
603
00:26:24.542 --> 00:26:27.766
But I can tell you, guys, you change the paradigms through repetition.
604
00:26:27.826 --> 00:26:33.112
You identify a paradigm that might be limiting or not in line with what you want to leave.
605
00:26:33.132 --> 00:26:34.413
And it could be a belief as well.
606
00:26:35.114 --> 00:26:37.376
And you change a quick story like I did.
607
00:26:37.957 --> 00:26:39.238
Man, things go my way.
608
00:26:39.919 --> 00:26:41.740
Life is easy, right?
609
00:26:41.840 --> 00:26:42.641
I'm a lucky guy.
610
00:26:43.441 --> 00:26:46.063
And because I didn't believe it yet, I put a penny in my pocket.
611
00:26:46.123 --> 00:26:50.026
Now it's a gold coin that says luck magnet on there.
612
00:26:50.446 --> 00:26:54.329
And yes, when I play golf, it's my ballmark, unless there's a ball behind me, I'm using a flat one.
613
00:26:54.790 --> 00:26:55.650
But it's my ballmark.
614
00:26:55.910 --> 00:26:58.733
It's a constant reminder of the paradigm that I want to live.
615
00:26:58.753 --> 00:26:59.373
Right.
616
00:27:00.473 --> 00:27:02.934
And when you go back to that, you are a happy guy.
617
00:27:02.954 --> 00:27:04.814
You are a happy, you know, your life is easy.
618
00:27:04.854 --> 00:27:05.775
You are a lucky guy.
619
00:27:06.655 --> 00:27:08.235
And that's what we need to do.
620
00:27:08.995 --> 00:27:10.736
Your paradigms are not rigid.
621
00:27:10.956 --> 00:27:12.516
Your beliefs are not rigid.
622
00:27:13.216 --> 00:27:20.918
If you have one that's not in line with the life you want to live, the person you want to be, drop the ego, make changes.
623
00:27:20.938 --> 00:27:21.859
And that's another thing we do.
624
00:27:21.879 --> 00:27:23.919
We have ego, so we're going to guard ourselves, man.
625
00:27:24.399 --> 00:27:26.360
Yeah, there's just no good people out there anymore.
626
00:27:26.500 --> 00:27:27.120
Bullshit.
627
00:27:27.880 --> 00:27:30.804
There's somebody out there praying for somebody like you in a relationship.
628
00:27:31.424 --> 00:27:33.126
You've got to get yourself to that place.
629
00:27:33.647 --> 00:27:35.890
That place I call acceptance, that place of freedom.
630
00:27:36.611 --> 00:27:40.635
And your beliefs and paradigms have to match what you want or you're never going to experience it, guys.
631
00:27:41.116 --> 00:27:45.421
I can promise you, you never, you're defying universal energetic law.
632
00:27:45.761 --> 00:27:46.522
You can't do it.
633
00:27:47.223 --> 00:27:47.864
But guess what?
634
00:27:48.604 --> 00:27:56.149
When you change your paradigm, when you change your belief, when you get in a high vibrational state of being of acceptance, then it comes flying towards you.
635
00:27:56.370 --> 00:27:58.011
You can't not have what you want.
636
00:27:58.451 --> 00:28:04.736
We're living in this beautiful, wonderful, cooperative environment, this field of energy.
637
00:28:05.276 --> 00:28:06.457
that must obey you.
638
00:28:06.837 --> 00:28:08.018
It has to respond.
639
00:28:08.378 --> 00:28:19.546
So when you commit to your paradigms and changing those through repetition, your beliefs, changing those, like coming up with the belief like I did and like thousands of my clients have done, you're going to experience it.
640
00:28:19.666 --> 00:28:20.947
Your physical world will catch up.
641
00:28:20.947 --> 00:28:21.508
All right, guys.
642
00:28:21.528 --> 00:28:22.689
So I hope you enjoyed this episode.
643
00:28:22.709 --> 00:28:23.810
You better hit the like button.
644
00:28:24.250 --> 00:28:25.351
You better hit the share button.
645
00:28:25.631 --> 00:28:28.794
You better hit the subscribe button or I'll be at your door and I'll find you.
646
00:28:28.934 --> 00:28:29.495
No, I won't.
647
00:28:29.555 --> 00:28:30.476
How am I going to find you?
648
00:28:30.516 --> 00:28:31.076
I'm just kidding.
649
00:28:31.096 --> 00:28:32.838
But do it because it's good stuff.
650
00:28:33.359 --> 00:28:34.339
Do it because you learn.
651
00:28:34.440 --> 00:28:35.080
All right, guys.
652
00:28:35.140 --> 00:28:35.741
Coach Mike here.
653
00:28:35.761 --> 00:28:36.862
I'll see you in the next episode.
654
00:28:38.560 --> 00:28:39.742
All right, that's the episode.
655
00:28:39.902 --> 00:28:42.225
If something in there hit home with you, here's what to do.
656
00:28:42.665 --> 00:28:45.248
First, hit subscribe so you don't miss the next episode.
657
00:28:45.869 --> 00:28:55.501
Next, check out the show notes or YouTube description because my team puts all the links mentioned from today's episodes in there as well as ways we can help you beyond this episode.
