WEBVTT
00:00:32.170 --> 00:00:34.090
Hello and welcome back.
00:00:34.250 --> 00:00:44.969
So today's episode is all about first dance lessons, and it's a topic that I'm surprised that in a year of running the podcast I have never actually touched on.
00:00:45.849 --> 00:00:48.570
And it's a question I'm often asked.
00:00:49.609 --> 00:00:51.849
Do we have to have lessons?
00:00:53.289 --> 00:00:58.009
And more importantly, do we have to have a first dance?
00:00:59.769 --> 00:01:18.810
Well, if you've read my book, you'll know that I actively tell you if the thought of doing a first dance in front of all of your guests scares you, makes you want to run for the hills, it is okay not to do it.
00:01:19.450 --> 00:01:21.530
You don't have to do a first dance.
00:01:21.769 --> 00:01:26.250
Just because it's tradition doesn't mean you have to do one.
00:01:27.609 --> 00:01:34.729
What I do say in the book, however, is give it some serious thought first.
00:01:35.689 --> 00:01:40.409
So before you switch off and don't listen anymore, I want you to tune in.
00:01:42.569 --> 00:02:01.209
Absolutely, yes, it is probably gonna scare you because the reality is we don't dance together anymore like we used to, and it's probably unnatural unless you are a performer or have done some sort of performing in your life.
00:02:01.289 --> 00:02:09.689
It's going to feel completely alien, but that's okay, and that's why people have lessons.
00:02:10.569 --> 00:02:16.090
Some people come to me for lessons because they know they want to do something choreographed.
00:02:16.569 --> 00:02:17.129
Great.
00:02:17.370 --> 00:02:23.050
They come to me with ideas, they send me video clips of things that they've seen as inspiration.
00:02:23.530 --> 00:02:24.170
Great.
00:02:25.370 --> 00:02:41.530
Others come to me because they feel they've got two left feet, they feel really anxious, they're really nervous and scared about being in the spotlight, and they just want some help to feel confident in that moment.
00:02:42.490 --> 00:02:56.969
And what we start with doing is getting into hold and finding a hold position that is natural for you as a couple that takes into account your dress and suit.
00:02:58.090 --> 00:03:11.450
Now, at the time of recording this, I went to a friend's wedding, which was a same-sex couple, and I was unsure how their first dance was going to go, but more importantly, I was unsure what they were going to wear.
00:03:11.770 --> 00:03:25.290
I've been really conscious of my language and not wanting to say dress and suits, because in a same-sex couple, female to female, it isn't necessarily dress and suit.
00:03:25.770 --> 00:03:32.890
The same goes for guys, but actually they were dress and suit.
00:03:33.130 --> 00:03:39.050
One was in a jumpsuit and one was in a dress, so it can work.
00:03:39.130 --> 00:03:46.490
So, and that's why I say whatever you are wearing, it is factored into how you are holding.
00:03:46.810 --> 00:04:00.250
Because if you are in a dress that is cut off the shoulders, but has a bit of a strap down kind of your arm, that's going to limit your range of movement.
00:04:01.050 --> 00:04:07.610
If you are in a suit, depending on how fitted your suit is, again, will restrict your range of movement.
00:04:07.770 --> 00:04:11.450
So that is factored when we put you in hold.
00:04:11.689 --> 00:04:14.010
Doesn't have to be traditional ballroom hold.
00:04:14.090 --> 00:04:17.689
I'm not making you strictly come dancing professionals.
00:04:18.329 --> 00:04:26.889
I'm making you you, the confident, relaxed version of you that does exist.
00:04:27.449 --> 00:04:31.689
You've just never had the opportunity to discover them.
00:04:31.850 --> 00:04:32.810
That's what we do.
00:04:32.889 --> 00:04:35.129
So we put you into hold.
00:04:36.170 --> 00:04:46.250
We put your song on, because by now you've definitely chosen your song if you've booked me for lessons, and if you're still finding out, that's okay too.
00:04:46.329 --> 00:04:49.529
But we kind of hurry it along trying to make a decision.
00:04:49.769 --> 00:05:03.849
Um, because it helps you to build that confidence to really know the song, the words, the pace, the rhythm, the things you can pick out to follow to keep you in time and connected.
00:05:04.089 --> 00:05:05.370
So that's what we work on.
00:05:05.529 --> 00:05:09.769
We get you moving to your song together.
00:05:10.089 --> 00:05:14.569
We just start with swaying, getting you feeling the rhythm.
00:05:15.689 --> 00:05:23.209
Then, depending on your song, will depend on a few moves that I will have had an idea to try.
00:05:23.449 --> 00:05:26.889
If it's a slow song, yeah, I've probably stuck a WAS box in.
00:05:26.969 --> 00:05:40.649
Sorry, it's a bit stereotypical, but it's simple and can look really effective, and anyone can pick it up because it's literally a box shape.
00:05:41.049 --> 00:05:48.969
And then we just add a bit of directions to it, which makes it look fancier, and everyone will have their nuances on how they do the waltz box.
00:05:49.129 --> 00:05:56.729
That's why I put it into majority of my routines because it's really simple, and if you forget, you just do a box.
00:05:56.969 --> 00:06:03.689
And worst case, if you really forget that, you sway and you signal your DJ to bring your guests in.
00:06:04.009 --> 00:06:06.250
So, getting back to the point.
00:06:06.810 --> 00:06:20.889
A lot of couples aren't coming to me for a routine, and I think that people feel that if they book lessons, they have to have a choreograph routine, and that's not the case.
00:06:21.049 --> 00:06:39.529
You can absolutely have, say, one to two lessons to work on how to hold each other, how to move to the music, get comfortable with that, and then maybe we stick a little waltz box into a spin, into a lean to get your picture moment.
00:06:42.490 --> 00:06:45.289
And then if you want to do something more, great.
00:06:45.769 --> 00:06:59.370
So you don't have to have lessons, you don't have to have a first dance, but you do have to have given it some serious thought.
00:07:01.769 --> 00:07:22.649
And I encourage you to book a consultation call to talk it through, to see if lessons are the right thing for you, because absolutely not everyone is right for lessons before you make that decision.
00:07:23.769 --> 00:07:36.250
I have had people, however, who have booked a consultation, who have gone on to book lessons and have cancelled.
00:07:36.810 --> 00:07:53.129
Because despite feeling the euphoria during a consultation call and the understanding that I get it, I am also a nervous dance teacher, I get apprehensive, I don't like being in the spotlight.
00:07:53.370 --> 00:08:06.810
In fact, it was mentioned to me on the dance floor at the friend's wedding, but you're a dancer, because I pulled a face at one of the songs and I looked at them and went, exactly, it's a typical song that I'm like, oh, really?
00:08:06.969 --> 00:08:08.329
Not this one again.
00:08:08.649 --> 00:08:39.370
But I didn't feel confident in that moment because there's an expectation for me as a dancer that I can move, and yes, I can do the choreograph stuff, but party dancing, I I get I get really self-conscious because of the fact that everyone knows I'm a dancer, so I understand how it feels to be in the spotlight and this expectation on you, and that's why I start slow.
00:08:39.930 --> 00:08:47.370
We put you in hold, we get you moving together because you've never done this, you've never danced together.
00:08:48.090 --> 00:09:01.850
You've got to build into each other's rhythm to make it look natural and not so obvious that you've had lessons, but we want those picture moments.
00:09:04.490 --> 00:09:06.250
So I want you to give it some thought.
00:09:09.449 --> 00:09:24.090
And if you want to have a talk, a talk, a talk, to see if lessons are right for you, whether I'm the right person for you, because yes, I do them in person, I can also do them virtual, then let's have a chat.
00:09:24.329 --> 00:09:30.730
Because before you just decide no, I don't want to first dance, I want to challenge you.
00:09:33.929 --> 00:09:39.049
But if you do decide that no, you don't want to first dance, that is okay.
00:09:39.289 --> 00:09:44.649
And I applaud you for having giving it some thought.
00:09:45.529 --> 00:09:50.889
So, having never discussed it, I am definitely going to be discussing it more.
00:09:51.370 --> 00:09:53.289
Different elements of first dance.
00:09:53.370 --> 00:09:57.529
So today's was do we actually have to have one or do we have to have lessons?
00:09:57.610 --> 00:10:03.449
And I hope you found it useful and got a little flavour in how I work with my couples.
00:10:04.250 --> 00:10:17.689
On future episodes, I will be discussing things like how to choose your song, if you can't choose a song, um, what to consider when going for your outfits.
00:10:17.929 --> 00:10:25.689
So, whether you're having lessons or not, you need to be able to move, and there are some things that you want to consider when you go looking for your dressing suits.
00:10:25.929 --> 00:10:28.329
Um, so they're on some future episodes.
00:10:28.490 --> 00:10:40.569
And if you have something in particular that you want me to discuss in relation to first dances or hen parties or movement in general, then please do drop me a message.
00:10:40.649 --> 00:10:46.970
I would love to make sure that this podcast is topics that you actually want to listen to.
00:10:47.610 --> 00:10:57.850
So I'm leaving you with that thought this week of really, really thinking whether lessons are for you or whether you're just not doing a first dance at all.
00:10:57.929 --> 00:11:05.449
And either option is okay, but know that the option is there if you want to discuss it through with someone to help you make that decision.
00:11:07.289 --> 00:11:08.490
Until next time.
00:11:09.449 --> 00:11:10.329
Let's move.
00:00:32.170 --> 00:00:34.090
Hello and welcome back.
00:00:34.250 --> 00:00:44.969
So today's episode is all about first dance lessons, and it's a topic that I'm surprised that in a year of running the podcast I have never actually touched on.
00:00:45.849 --> 00:00:48.570
And it's a question I'm often asked.
00:00:49.609 --> 00:00:51.849
Do we have to have lessons?
00:00:53.289 --> 00:00:58.009
And more importantly, do we have to have a first dance?
00:00:59.769 --> 00:01:18.810
Well, if you've read my book, you'll know that I actively tell you if the thought of doing a first dance in front of all of your guests scares you, makes you want to run for the hills, it is okay not to do it.
00:01:19.450 --> 00:01:21.530
You don't have to do a first dance.
00:01:21.769 --> 00:01:26.250
Just because it's tradition doesn't mean you have to do one.
00:01:27.609 --> 00:01:34.729
What I do say in the book, however, is give it some serious thought first.
00:01:35.689 --> 00:01:40.409
So before you switch off and don't listen anymore, I want you to tune in.
00:01:42.569 --> 00:02:01.209
Absolutely, yes, it is probably gonna scare you because the reality is we don't dance together anymore like we used to, and it's probably unnatural unless you are a performer or have done some sort of performing in your life.
00:02:01.289 --> 00:02:09.689
It's going to feel completely alien, but that's okay, and that's why people have lessons.
00:02:10.569 --> 00:02:16.090
Some people come to me for lessons because they know they want to do something choreographed.
00:02:16.569 --> 00:02:17.129
Great.
00:02:17.370 --> 00:02:23.050
They come to me with ideas, they send me video clips of things that they've seen as inspiration.
00:02:23.530 --> 00:02:24.170
Great.
00:02:25.370 --> 00:02:41.530
Others come to me because they feel they've got two left feet, they feel really anxious, they're really nervous and scared about being in the spotlight, and they just want some help to feel confident in that moment.
00:02:42.490 --> 00:02:56.969
And what we start with doing is getting into hold and finding a hold position that is natural for you as a couple that takes into account your dress and suit.
00:02:58.090 --> 00:03:11.450
Now, at the time of recording this, I went to a friend's wedding, which was a same-sex couple, and I was unsure how their first dance was going to go, but more importantly, I was unsure what they were going to wear.
00:03:11.770 --> 00:03:25.290
I've been really conscious of my language and not wanting to say dress and suits, because in a same-sex couple, female to female, it isn't necessarily dress and suit.
00:03:25.770 --> 00:03:32.890
The same goes for guys, but actually they were dress and suit.
00:03:33.130 --> 00:03:39.050
One was in a jumpsuit and one was in a dress, so it can work.
00:03:39.130 --> 00:03:46.490
So, and that's why I say whatever you are wearing, it is factored into how you are holding.
00:03:46.810 --> 00:04:00.250
Because if you are in a dress that is cut off the shoulders, but has a bit of a strap down kind of your arm, that's going to limit your range of movement.
00:04:01.050 --> 00:04:07.610
If you are in a suit, depending on how fitted your suit is, again, will restrict your range of movement.
00:04:07.770 --> 00:04:11.450
So that is factored when we put you in hold.
00:04:11.689 --> 00:04:14.010
Doesn't have to be traditional ballroom hold.
00:04:14.090 --> 00:04:17.689
I'm not making you strictly come dancing professionals.
00:04:18.329 --> 00:04:26.889
I'm making you you, the confident, relaxed version of you that does exist.
00:04:27.449 --> 00:04:31.689
You've just never had the opportunity to discover them.
00:04:31.850 --> 00:04:32.810
That's what we do.
00:04:32.889 --> 00:04:35.129
So we put you into hold.
00:04:36.170 --> 00:04:46.250
We put your song on, because by now you've definitely chosen your song if you've booked me for lessons, and if you're still finding out, that's okay too.
00:04:46.329 --> 00:04:49.529
But we kind of hurry it along trying to make a decision.
00:04:49.769 --> 00:05:03.849
Um, because it helps you to build that confidence to really know the song, the words, the pace, the rhythm, the things you can pick out to follow to keep you in time and connected.
00:05:04.089 --> 00:05:05.370
So that's what we work on.
00:05:05.529 --> 00:05:09.769
We get you moving to your song together.
00:05:10.089 --> 00:05:14.569
We just start with swaying, getting you feeling the rhythm.
00:05:15.689 --> 00:05:23.209
Then, depending on your song, will depend on a few moves that I will have had an idea to try.
00:05:23.449 --> 00:05:26.889
If it's a slow song, yeah, I've probably stuck a WAS box in.
00:05:26.969 --> 00:05:40.649
Sorry, it's a bit stereotypical, but it's simple and can look really effective, and anyone can pick it up because it's literally a box shape.
00:05:41.049 --> 00:05:48.969
And then we just add a bit of directions to it, which makes it look fancier, and everyone will have their nuances on how they do the waltz box.
00:05:49.129 --> 00:05:56.729
That's why I put it into majority of my routines because it's really simple, and if you forget, you just do a box.
00:05:56.969 --> 00:06:03.689
And worst case, if you really forget that, you sway and you signal your DJ to bring your guests in.
00:06:04.009 --> 00:06:06.250
So, getting back to the point.
00:06:06.810 --> 00:06:20.889
A lot of couples aren't coming to me for a routine, and I think that people feel that if they book lessons, they have to have a choreograph routine, and that's not the case.
00:06:21.049 --> 00:06:39.529
You can absolutely have, say, one to two lessons to work on how to hold each other, how to move to the music, get comfortable with that, and then maybe we stick a little waltz box into a spin, into a lean to get your picture moment.
00:06:42.490 --> 00:06:45.289
And then if you want to do something more, great.
00:06:45.769 --> 00:06:59.370
So you don't have to have lessons, you don't have to have a first dance, but you do have to have given it some serious thought.
00:07:01.769 --> 00:07:22.649
And I encourage you to book a consultation call to talk it through, to see if lessons are the right thing for you, because absolutely not everyone is right for lessons before you make that decision.
00:07:23.769 --> 00:07:36.250
I have had people, however, who have booked a consultation, who have gone on to book lessons and have cancelled.
00:07:36.810 --> 00:07:53.129
Because despite feeling the euphoria during a consultation call and the understanding that I get it, I am also a nervous dance teacher, I get apprehensive, I don't like being in the spotlight.
00:07:53.370 --> 00:08:06.810
In fact, it was mentioned to me on the dance floor at the friend's wedding, but you're a dancer, because I pulled a face at one of the songs and I looked at them and went, exactly, it's a typical song that I'm like, oh, really?
00:08:06.969 --> 00:08:08.329
Not this one again.
00:08:08.649 --> 00:08:39.370
But I didn't feel confident in that moment because there's an expectation for me as a dancer that I can move, and yes, I can do the choreograph stuff, but party dancing, I I get I get really self-conscious because of the fact that everyone knows I'm a dancer, so I understand how it feels to be in the spotlight and this expectation on you, and that's why I start slow.
00:08:39.930 --> 00:08:47.370
We put you in hold, we get you moving together because you've never done this, you've never danced together.
00:08:48.090 --> 00:09:01.850
You've got to build into each other's rhythm to make it look natural and not so obvious that you've had lessons, but we want those picture moments.
00:09:04.490 --> 00:09:06.250
So I want you to give it some thought.
00:09:09.449 --> 00:09:24.090
And if you want to have a talk, a talk, a talk, to see if lessons are right for you, whether I'm the right person for you, because yes, I do them in person, I can also do them virtual, then let's have a chat.
00:09:24.329 --> 00:09:30.730
Because before you just decide no, I don't want to first dance, I want to challenge you.
00:09:33.929 --> 00:09:39.049
But if you do decide that no, you don't want to first dance, that is okay.
00:09:39.289 --> 00:09:44.649
And I applaud you for having giving it some thought.
00:09:45.529 --> 00:09:50.889
So, having never discussed it, I am definitely going to be discussing it more.
00:09:51.370 --> 00:09:53.289
Different elements of first dance.
00:09:53.370 --> 00:09:57.529
So today's was do we actually have to have one or do we have to have lessons?
00:09:57.610 --> 00:10:03.449
And I hope you found it useful and got a little flavour in how I work with my couples.
00:10:04.250 --> 00:10:17.689
On future episodes, I will be discussing things like how to choose your song, if you can't choose a song, um, what to consider when going for your outfits.
00:10:17.929 --> 00:10:25.689
So, whether you're having lessons or not, you need to be able to move, and there are some things that you want to consider when you go looking for your dressing suits.
00:10:25.929 --> 00:10:28.329
Um, so they're on some future episodes.
00:10:28.490 --> 00:10:40.569
And if you have something in particular that you want me to discuss in relation to first dances or hen parties or movement in general, then please do drop me a message.
00:10:40.649 --> 00:10:46.970
I would love to make sure that this podcast is topics that you actually want to listen to.
00:10:47.610 --> 00:10:57.850
So I'm leaving you with that thought this week of really, really thinking whether lessons are for you or whether you're just not doing a first dance at all.
00:10:57.929 --> 00:11:05.449
And either option is okay, but know that the option is there if you want to discuss it through with someone to help you make that decision.
00:11:07.289 --> 00:11:08.490
Until next time.
00:11:09.449 --> 00:11:10.329
Let's move.
