Featuring: Aubria Ralph

WEBVTT
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Hello and welcome to Journey Lines, the show answering the question, how did they get there?
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I'm your host Kim Minnick.
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Each episode, my guest is invited to complete a reflective exercise plotting the highs and lows of their career, and then they walk us through it.
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With me today is Aubria Ralph.
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Aubria, welcome.
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Thank you so much for having me Kim.
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I'm so excited to go through my journey line with you.
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I can't wait to hear your story.
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Aubria and I just met nine minutes ago.
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So really excited to get to hear everything.
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But first and foremost, what's going on today?
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What are you up to either personally, professionally, holistically?
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What's happening?
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So personally, I am actually in the middle of moving back to my childhood home because I am convinced that I can help sort out my mom's house.
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So we'll see how that goes.
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Really, it's about, I think, twofold.
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One, helping her just kind of prepare for her retirement.
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But then also kind of like clearing out the cobwebs, know, like all of the things that we just held on to for years upon years that like we haven't even looked at and deciding it's time, it's time to, you know, and I'm actually the perfect kid to do that with her because I don't have emotional attachments to things.
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Can you come to my house?
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I have emotional attachment to things.
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You know, like, I think I had an emotional attachment to a scarf once.
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And my mom, actually, this was like, I'm thinking back, this had to be like 2011, 2012.
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And I happened to be at her house then.
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And she was doing me a favor by trying to do my laundry for me.
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And that scarf was dry clean only.
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And...
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I cried like I lost a child.
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And after that moment, I was like, you can never have an attachment like that to anything.
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You know, but I remember it's funny that like I was latched on to that of all things.
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Maybe that's why I'm taking pleasure in going to her house and helping her.
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this is finally, we've come back around.
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What can I throw in the washer for you?
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But I think my mom has been kind of the hub for some of the extended family that lives in the States with us.
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And so she ends up just collecting everybody's stuff.
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And so we just decided that it would probably be better to do that.
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To just, Moving.
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Before the place that I'm in now, I think I moved something like six times in seven years.
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Yeah, yeah, yeah, it was during my 20s actually.
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I feel like I was always moving.
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Yeah, like, completely non-committal in the place that I was gonna live.
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And I think part of it is like, this like desire to not be pinned to anything and like just having it's like I've always just really enjoyed freedom in a way you know and mostly like physical freedom the ability to just kind of pick up and do what I want and it's bizarre because I'm also very very structured so like the two personalities working together don't make a lot of sense sometimes because on the one hand I'm little miss open free spirit on the other hand i'm like no it has to be this way and only this way in this order and you know and so like I feel like you have very strong frameworks that you can pick up and move anywhere, is what it sounds like.
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my gosh, amazing.
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Well, why don't you kick us off in your journey line?
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I see we are starting, or so many of folks start, in retail and corporate management.
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Corporate management, around 2003?
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We're kicking things off?
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All right, what's going on in your life then?
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I'm in, I'm like in high school and yeah, so it's my first job.
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I had been trying to get a job for, I don't know, four years at that point, but my mom was just not having it.
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And then I turned 18, I finally turned 18 and she was a little bit more open to me getting a job.
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And it started out as like a part-time, literally one day a week gig, because my mom said I could work weekends, but she really meant Saturday.
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And Sunday was church.
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so we don't do things on Sunday.
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We don't work on Sunday.
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So it was one of those things where I remember like just even getting a retail place to agree to that kind of schedule.
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I can't imagine.
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Just one day?
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Was it in a mall?
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I imagine it's in a mall.
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It was like one of those strip malls out on Long Island and it ended up being a stables and I think the only reason he agreed is because one of my friends from high school recommended me.
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So really my first job, like it wasn't a real application.
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It was like, you should hire her because she's great.
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And like, and so I ended up being like a copy and print center associate.
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Amazing.
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and as a result now have like, wait, I know way too much about like copyright and trademark and all this stuff as a result.
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Yeah, it's like, like I'm the person that's like holding that, is this 24 pound linen?
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And people are like looking at me like, what is wrong with you, Aubria?
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I like why, why are you this way?
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but yeah.
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deep.
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I know people who like started at grocery stores and they're like, I would prefer to pack my own groceries, thank you.
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It's funny how those early jobs stick with us.
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really do.
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I mean, I feel like I learned like looking back, I had a really good set of like managers in that place.
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Like I remember like the copy and print manager, she was just incredible.
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I like you always hear people talk about like servant leadership.
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I feel like she embodied that because she was just always so concerned about each person, like she knew everybody's story and it was constantly in her head.
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So even as she made a schedule, like she was always thinking, you know, like our Jewish employees, like she knew like they don't, they can't be there for Shabbat.
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Like, and it was just like so natural for her.
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Like I think like later on in life, when I started having to even discuss some of the things I had to discuss, it It was so odd to me because I grew up in my work around people who were just so aware and willing to meet people where they are, which I think seems to be going away more and more.
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Although we're talking about it a lot, I feel like there's really less.
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act of it.
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less like actually meeting people where they are.
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It's just, we want to meet you where you are.
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like, but these are all the conditions that are attached, which, doesn't really work.
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Right.
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And so I remember I graduated high school and my, my boss was like, you know, kind of looking for a new manager because the manager, she got promoted.
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cause she was so good.
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And.
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I was starting college and I was like, I don't know if I could do college and like, I don't know I want to risk it.
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Like, I just want to like focus on school.
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So I put in my two week notice and my two week notice was met with a no, no, no, you can't quit because we want to promote you.
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it was, it was funny because, And it's funny, I was just talking about this this past week and I feel like I've been talking about this a lot, just like the money aspect of work.
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And I remember when they said that, I thought about, I was like, well, how much does a manager make?
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And so I think it was like 10 or 12 dollars.
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Like it wasn't a lot of money, but for me it was a lot because I did the math.
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kid in the early 2000s, like that's not a, that's pretty good spending money.
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And then we had stock options too, and full benefits.
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And I lived at home and my mom paid for the car and she paid for the insurance.
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So like, that was all my money.
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And so I remember like saying, okay, like totally renegotiated the terms and now like I was going to be the manager.
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I didn't want to leave anymore.
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But I had the financial capacity to just pay whatever scholarships didn't cover for school as a result.
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And so getting that manager title on my resume that early, like it completely like it, I couldn't imagine, like, I don't know what it looks like.
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I don't know what it looks like to like not have control of your schedule.
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as an employee.
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I've been doing my own schedule since I was 18 and a half.
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So you've always had this like layer of flexibility within your work and working full time as a manager at so early in your career and going to school full time, I'm assuming.
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That's a wild time.
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And you go to SUNY and SUNY?
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so my mom like got in her head that if I went away to school, I was going to like turn into this like rebellious character that she created in her mind.
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And so like.
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I was kind of like, I was annoyed with, I remember being really annoyed with her and just being like, you know what, fine.
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And so I ended up just enrolling in like the local community college.
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And for me, like, it's funny, I hear people talking about, what did I call it?
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It's like the, like the shame, like some kind of, my God.
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We called it 13th grade when people would go to the community college.
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It was.
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In hindsight, 2020, now that I understand money, that's a better idea.
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no, it's like, like total.
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And that, and so for me, this is like the pragmatist in me.
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Like the dreamer in me was like, I'm going away to school.
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But then when I couldn't, it was just kind of like, all right, like, how can you afford school without mom?
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And so like the fact, like, yeah.
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And a lot of them.
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was going to get low.
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And that was the thing.
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I remember I had teachers that were willing to co-sign my loans in high school.
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I mean, that says a lot about, so much, like your ability as a student, the community that you grew up in, but also, now that I understand money, I'm not trying to cosign a loan for any 18 year old.
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for me, like looking back, I'm like, like I had at least three teachers in high school that were like, if you need it, like, I will do it for you.
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And me being like, nah, man, my, you don't know my mother, like, I'm not trying to, I'm not trying to wake that line up.
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Okay.
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and so like, and ultimately I didn't want loans.
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That was not of interest to me.
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And so like the goal was okay.
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We'll just pay for it cash We'll figure out how to pay for it cash and that's why when they offered that management role Like I did the math in my head and I was like, so I could pay for school in like like two to three months of work without overtime But there was always overtime so I could pay for I could pay for a semester of classes unlike maybe a month of school.
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Man, that's huge.
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you, I mean, you're taking a pretty serious load, chemistry and English major and a philosophy minor.
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That's a b- was like, I was such a nerd.
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I still am a huge nerd, even though I like, I try to like, act like really nonchalant.
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Then I like have these savant moments where people are like, wait, but you're, you don't do that for work.
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Why do you know about this?
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And I'm like, I just, I just read a lot.
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I know a lot about a lot of things.
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That's a nice place to be.
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of the reason my undergrad focus was the way that it was, it's because I remember taking like AP European history in high school and learning about like the Renaissance scholars and deciding I was gonna be a Renaissance scholar in like, in the 21st century.
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Perfect.
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so like that was the goal.
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and so for me, like I graduated high school, think we're like 24.
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Yeah.
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It was like 24 college credits.
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And so I went in.
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Yeah.
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It was like one of, you know, like I, I think I was like, I think we ended with me fifth in class.
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It was like so crazy.
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It was, it was absolutely nuts that I went to community college.
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Let's just put it that way.
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Like.
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When people saw me on campus, they were like, wait, why are you here?
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Like, are you?
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But for me, I never really cared about that.
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I never cared what people thought about what I was doing as long as I felt like it was right for me.
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I was never the kid that was peer pressured in school.
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I always tell people, even now as an adult, people will say, why aren't you doing this or why aren't you doing that?
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And I'm like, you can't peer pressure me, man.
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if, you know, but what I really liked about focusing my studies in the way that I did is, cause it just went back to that freedom that I wanted.
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I wanted to be able to do whatever I chose to, knowing that I had like, just like a vast interest base.
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And so it was one of those things where I was like, I was going to be a brain surgeon when I started college.
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you know, you know, and, and I, I was convinced.
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mean, I had all the credits, you know, like even before law school, I, I remember like thinking like, is it going to be med school?
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Is it going to be law school?
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Like I had that conversation with myself again because I wanted to be sure, but like I actually enjoy law.
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like, like I'm very like, I'm into rules, mostly like if I'm being honest, loopholes in rules.
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yeah, and so yeah, it's like, like just constant puzzles, right?
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And I think medicine can be that way too, so I don't wanna like say that it's not, but ultimately my obsession with books and people and how society works made me a better lawyer candidate than a, yeah.
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English and history, like that's so much of the written language.
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Like playing with language, know, writing in such a way where it's like either restrictive or, you know, the embodiment of what you need.
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And so like just playing with that.
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So for me, like one of my heroes was Chaucer because he was a legal scholar.
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Like he, you know, like I think he...
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love that.
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You know, he was like actually like a legal apprentice doing law by day while writing the Canterbury Tales at night.
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Like what?
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And like I read recently that he was like super controversial.
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I don't know, everybody is controversial.
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Yeah, in his time.
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No, but like if you look at him with a modern eye, he's like terrible human man.
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He's like a terrible person, right?
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But like...
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who wasn't in the Middle Ages.
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people's fame brings them throughout history.
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They're either really great or really bad.
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yeah, and you know, and the Dark Ages was just not a time for goodness necessarily.
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Like that's kind of why it was called that.
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You know, they say it's because of like no learning, but like there was a lot of dark stuff happening during the Middle Ages.
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So feel free to look it up on your own time.
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Yeah, yeah, take some time.
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Go educate yourself on the Canterbury Tales and then Chaucer.
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So it looks like you do decide to go to law school though around 2009.
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And then I see just a quick drop, and I also remember that market crash around 2009.
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How did those events play out in your life?
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Yeah, so I was at this point working as like a store manager at an assistant store manager at like Calypso St.
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Barth.
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And that's like, it's one of my favorite places that I worked because it was like, like I went into like a completely different world where people were buying resort wear no matter what time of year it was.
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Like it would be the dead of winter.
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and some beautiful woman would walk through my doors and ask me to help her pick out outfits.
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she would never be, like we would have cashmere and stuff like that, but she'd always want the sarongs and the bathing suits and the tunics because, know, after the holidays, they were going to Aruba and I got to like, and so like, just lived in this like suspended reality.
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when I worked at this place.
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But I loved, I actually really enjoyed it because it's like I got to play dress up the whole time.
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think prior to that, I was very tomboyish in a sense that like I wore a lot of baggy clothes.
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I think I've definitely regressed to that as an adult.
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Look, I'm in my soft era.
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I'm wearing baggy comfy clothes too, like cozy.
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You know, like, and so for me, I think that was like really good for me because it helped me like learn how to be like a feminine woman, right?
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Just being around women like that in a way that like, I'm sure like if I just paid attention to the women in my family, I could have done that too, but I was so anti as a kid.
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So yeah, yeah.
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it could be exactly what family is saying, but no, no, this person obviously knows.
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came to looks.
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I remember as like, I think I was 16 and my mom wanted me to like, I think she wanted me to do like New York, like do like Miss Junior New York or something like that.
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And I remember looking at her like she was nuts and being like, are you serious?
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I don't wanna be known for being beautiful.
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I wanna be known for being smart.
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And so it was like.
00:22:11.623 --> 00:22:17.276
And so like really minimal focus on looks.
00:22:18.412 --> 00:22:23.374
wonder how many other self-described young nerds go through that.
00:22:23.374 --> 00:22:29.506
Like, I feel like a lot of time young girls are given the choice, you are pretty or you are smart pick.
00:22:29.506 --> 00:22:34.387
And Disney, you know, puts the glasses and then they're smart and takes them off and then they're pretty.
00:22:34.387 --> 00:22:39.147
Interesting that that influence kind of came with you as well.
00:22:39.147 --> 00:22:43.470
And I think it came from like, like I'm West Indian.
00:22:43.470 --> 00:22:53.242
I come from a West Indian family and the mindset's very much kind of like beauty fades and like, you know, it's what you have on the inside that counts.
00:22:53.242 --> 00:23:00.317
Like I feel like they had been like sending me those subliminal messages like since I came out of the womb anyway.
00:23:00.877 --> 00:23:02.117
Yeah.
00:23:02.778 --> 00:23:03.838
You know.
00:23:03.932 --> 00:23:20.296
and then like upset that I didn't want to wear a dress, you know, you know, proves that you can adjust and people will still not be okay.
00:23:20.296 --> 00:23:36.730
know, but yeah, and so like what I, that place paid for the rest of undergrad, you know, they, I, I was making a lot of money there and they paid for the first masters.
00:23:38.509 --> 00:23:39.641
That's wild.
00:23:39.641 --> 00:23:45.474
Was this part of like the retail, like, pardon me, was this part of their like employee perks?
00:23:45.474 --> 00:23:47.257
Was it tuition reimbursement?
00:23:47.257 --> 00:23:48.865
Or was it just like that cash money?
00:23:48.865 --> 00:23:57.980
paid you cash money, like stupid money for like, like I got paid commissions and I was a good sales.
00:23:57.980 --> 00:24:09.647
was like, although I was managing, I was also really good at sales and managers got to like get their individual commission and then a store bonus as well.
00:24:09.647 --> 00:24:18.801
And I was like, I was so like frugal back then because the goal was always work is funding school.
00:24:19.022 --> 00:24:30.182
It was never like that was always the priority like and so the more money I got just went into my school fund and so I noticed you slipped in first masters.
00:24:31.815 --> 00:24:39.551
so I actually end up getting a master's in medieval studies and so So cool.
00:24:39.838 --> 00:24:41.838
Yeah, they didn't think so.
00:24:42.118 --> 00:24:45.138
The family were not okay with that.
00:24:45.439 --> 00:24:47.597
I remember, I remember.
00:24:47.597 --> 00:24:49.518
I've spent money on worse things.
00:24:50.792 --> 00:25:01.742
But you know, I had gotten into Fordham Law back then and they weren't giving any money for school.
00:25:02.925 --> 00:25:03.679
Mmm.
00:25:03.679 --> 00:25:11.798
And at Calypso, I was in charge of doing the screeners for people that were looking for jobs.
00:25:11.798 --> 00:25:18.618
And I remember interviewing a woman who I think she had graduated from Fordham Law too.
00:25:19.338 --> 00:25:22.499
And she couldn't find a job.
00:25:22.499 --> 00:25:32.118
She had been out of law school, I think, since 2008, which is when the market started becoming crazy.
00:25:32.375 --> 00:25:38.616
And so by like spring of 2009, she still hadn't found a job.
00:25:39.237 --> 00:25:53.301
And the pragmatist in me was kind of like, okay, if she's looking for part-time work here, I can't afford to take that kind of risk right now.
00:25:53.301 --> 00:25:55.142
Like, know.
00:25:56.403 --> 00:25:57.823
Yeah, and.
00:25:57.823 --> 00:26:08.863
And I knew, and I knew law school was going to be the school where I would have to take out some loans just because of the nature of law school.
00:26:08.863 --> 00:26:25.661
And I ended up reaching out to the people at CUNY Brooklyn College, which is where I ended up getting my bachelor's degree, well after the application period for the master's programs and begged them.
00:26:25.661 --> 00:26:35.480
to let me in for fall of 2009 when I find, cause I just had to like come to grips with the fact that like I was not going to law school that fall.
00:26:35.921 --> 00:26:49.104
But I wanted to go to school because I was like, okay, like you have your bachelor's degree, but you don't like, you need to like do more, you know, like, yeah.
00:26:49.104 --> 00:26:49.724
And so.
00:26:49.724 --> 00:26:54.798
feel like I graduated around that time, around 2009, and it was very clear.
00:26:54.919 --> 00:26:58.761
Bachelor's degrees aren't gonna get you very far at this stage.
00:26:59.942 --> 00:27:03.451
So as any responsible student, Medieval Studies.
00:27:03.451 --> 00:27:09.098
I will say looking back, I probably should have gotten an MBA.
00:27:09.682 --> 00:27:11.063
Probably.
00:27:11.482 --> 00:27:24.086
But like, I think I just, that like the anti-person in me, the free spirit in me was kind of like, well, I don't know anything about that period.
00:27:24.386 --> 00:27:26.267
I've read other things.
00:27:26.462 --> 00:27:27.683
I'll focus on this.
00:27:27.683 --> 00:27:36.109
And I ended up being like the only, I think one of two women in the medieval studies program.
00:27:37.290 --> 00:27:42.174
The only one, yeah, no, three people.
00:27:42.335 --> 00:27:51.382
the only, like everybody else was like a 20th century or postmodernist like person, right?
00:27:51.662 --> 00:27:52.481
And.
00:27:52.990 --> 00:27:58.290
So, and then I was like, I think I was the only black person at the school to ever get it.
00:27:58.290 --> 00:28:00.391
Like, it's just like so ridiculous.
00:28:00.391 --> 00:28:05.830
Just like, and so for me, I was like, this is gonna be great.
00:28:05.851 --> 00:28:08.971
And it ended up being really awesome.
00:28:11.171 --> 00:28:12.810
used to know Middle English.
00:28:12.810 --> 00:28:14.711
I don't know it anymore.
00:28:15.730 --> 00:28:41.398
But like, there was like a period of time where like I could and the- coolest part about that role was it was kind of a joke getting that degree because if people with degrees that made sense in 2009 couldn't find a job.
00:28:44.019 --> 00:29:00.895
Getting a degree in medieval studies during a market crash has to be the most that like to me it just it felt like such an act of rebellion like whatever world.
00:29:01.301 --> 00:29:04.694
It's a little like, f--- you economy, f--- you school.
00:29:05.439 --> 00:29:12.999
And I remember my mom being really proud when I told her, yeah, I enrolled in the master's program.
00:29:12.999 --> 00:29:22.019
And I didn't go further until her friends started asking her, what kind of master's is your daughter getting?
00:29:22.058 --> 00:29:29.759
And so I remember her calling me up and being like, you never told me what you're getting your master's in.
00:29:29.759 --> 00:29:32.719
And I was like, medieval studies.
00:29:32.719 --> 00:29:34.515
And she was like, what?
00:29:35.143 --> 00:29:41.767
I like medieval studies, know, like that period of time, like during like, like the 1200s and 1300s.
00:29:41.767 --> 00:29:45.869
And she was like, she was like, I don't understand.
00:29:48.412 --> 00:29:50.512
She was like, I don't understand.
00:29:50.733 --> 00:29:54.006
and I was like, yeah, no, I just thought it'd be really interesting.
00:29:54.006 --> 00:29:56.928
And I mean, I'm, paying out of pocket, so it's fine.
00:29:56.928 --> 00:29:57.657
Right.
00:29:57.657 --> 00:29:59.962
And she, and she was like, okay.
00:29:59.962 --> 00:30:05.212
I remember just like hanging up the phone and like, absolutely like dismay right.
00:30:07.084 --> 00:30:29.810
Two years later, it's like my spring, the spring I'm graduating, and one of my professors has put my name on a short list to get one of the three positions they're offering to graduates to be a professor, to be like, I think we were, yeah, like adjunct professors, like for the fall of that year.
00:30:29.810 --> 00:30:31.046
studies, I assume.
00:30:31.634 --> 00:30:32.747
Cool.
00:30:32.934 --> 00:30:37.686
And so like graduation day, and and I got a job.
00:30:37.686 --> 00:30:43.137
Like, I found out about that I think in like March that they were doing that.
00:30:43.137 --> 00:30:51.701
And then I like got a job as an assistant GM at Papyrus, the card store, the overpriced card store.
00:30:51.701 --> 00:30:52.721
So good.
00:30:54.507 --> 00:30:55.859
some stationary.
00:30:57.439 --> 00:31:03.199
I have way too much stuff from Papyrus still, from my stint working there.
00:31:03.199 --> 00:31:08.538
But I ended up getting a job there because I was like, well, it's adjunct day.
00:31:08.538 --> 00:31:14.959
I knew adjunct professors who didn't do very well financially.
00:31:14.959 --> 00:31:17.598
And I was like, I'd be not doing that.
00:31:17.598 --> 00:31:22.358
It's cool to say you're a professor, but it's cool to have money.
00:31:22.358 --> 00:31:26.159
so I did that.
00:31:26.439 --> 00:31:33.023
I remember like on graduation day, my mom was like, yeah, know, know, my stepdad was there too.
00:31:33.023 --> 00:31:34.905
And they're like so proud.
00:31:34.905 --> 00:31:42.010
And I didn't tell her about the, when I finally got, you know, I knew by then that I got the, the adjunct professor role.
00:31:42.019 --> 00:31:47.375
I was like, just so you know, I got a job because of this degree.
00:31:47.375 --> 00:31:56.403
And she was so happy because now she could like go back and report to her friends that now she had a college professor daughter.
00:31:57.548 --> 00:32:02.790
you know, but, but like for me, like it just worked out.
00:32:02.790 --> 00:32:22.702
so like, one of the things I always tell people, you know, that I meet is, you know, my life like didn't go the way I planned it, but I've gotten some really cool like bonus things along the way that I can't really explain.
00:32:22.702 --> 00:32:28.186
Like, I don't know why that professor took an interest in me and not an interest in other people.
00:32:28.186 --> 00:32:30.137
Like, I don't know why, right?
00:32:30.137 --> 00:32:39.382
I don't know why when I showed up for to quit my job as an 18 year old, my manager was like, no, no, no.
00:32:39.382 --> 00:32:48.455
Like, like I don't, you know, like, and as much as I think I'm great, like there are a lot of great people who didn't have those opportunities, right?
00:32:48.455 --> 00:32:52.017
And like, that's something I like always remind myself, like.
00:32:52.027 --> 00:32:54.866
Yes, like I've worked really hard.
00:32:54.866 --> 00:33:20.759
You know, I've been in the right place at the right time and like all of, you know, like I've planned and I've done all these things, but I know a lot of people who did, who worked, who even worked harder than I did and planned better and didn't like think it was a joke to spend two years getting a master's in medieval studies.
00:33:21.858 --> 00:33:24.570
who didn't get the opportunities, right?
00:33:24.570 --> 00:33:42.240
And so, I always remind my, and this is where my faith comes into things, because I'm like, the only way I can explain some of the things that have happened is like, God has to be real for me.
00:33:42.240 --> 00:33:46.143
Because there's just too many coincidences.
00:33:46.143 --> 00:33:56.407
There are too many things where I'm like, that wasn't supposed to work out that Like it was just so like it's like packaged so well, no struggle, right?
00:33:56.407 --> 00:33:59.859
Like I remember showing up for that interview.
00:33:59.859 --> 00:34:02.335
That was like the coolest interview I ever had.
00:34:02.335 --> 00:34:04.252
I like, and I took it seriously.
00:34:04.252 --> 00:34:09.326
Like I showed up, you know, in my suit with, you know, I actually combed my hair that day.
00:34:09.326 --> 00:34:13.807
Like I was really, you know, I was ready, right?
00:34:14.108 --> 00:34:19.210
Show up and two of the three people doing the interview for that role.
00:34:19.391 --> 00:34:21.155
We're past professors.
00:34:22.476 --> 00:34:24.304
You like know the whole interview panel.
00:34:24.304 --> 00:34:26.797
And they didn't even interview me.
00:34:27.057 --> 00:34:33.923
The two who knew me were concerned that the other person had never met me.
00:34:33.923 --> 00:34:38.208
And so they spent the entire time telling her all the great things about me.
00:34:38.208 --> 00:34:40.889
I didn't have to answer one question.
00:34:41.751 --> 00:34:44.847
We have more interviews that are actually just compliment panels.
00:34:44.847 --> 00:34:47.608
That would, that's my new goal.
00:34:47.811 --> 00:34:50.492
Change the interview process, compliment panels.
00:34:51.619 --> 00:35:11.777
but it was like i remember like i always think back on like and that's one of the things where i'm like what are the odds right the person who applies late gets a random degree but also the person who called and begged to be in that program.
00:35:11.777 --> 00:35:19.943
The person who since high school has been investing time and energy into medieval studies.
00:35:19.943 --> 00:35:25.677
So yes, and I think, you know, a little sprinkle of faith and showing up.
00:35:25.677 --> 00:35:38.298
no, and so I'm definitely a believer that you can have all the faith in the world, but if you're not doing anything, and that's not even just me.
00:35:38.298 --> 00:35:41.623
The whole Bible says that.
00:35:41.623 --> 00:35:43.884
Faith without work is dead.
00:35:45.101 --> 00:35:47.711
So, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:35:47.711 --> 00:35:52.521
So you are, you're a professor for a long time, like eight years, nine years.
00:35:52.521 --> 00:35:53.264
and half years.
00:35:53.264 --> 00:35:54.748
It's crazy.
00:35:55.701 --> 00:35:57.702
and the school doesn't stop.
00:35:57.702 --> 00:35:58.505
No.
00:36:01.619 --> 00:36:13.251
I think I was trying to convince people to pay me to be a scholar and it just didn't, like I was trying to send subliminal messages to the universe to get me to be a paid student.
00:36:13.251 --> 00:36:20.780
Like just go to school, learn things, come up with ideas and go back to more school.
00:36:20.780 --> 00:36:23.322
But there was just no.
00:36:24.014 --> 00:36:27.184
just didn't, gave it your best shot.
00:36:27.184 --> 00:36:31.014
You get a master's in non-profit finance, is that what that is?
00:36:31.014 --> 00:36:40.972
yeah, so, it's And it feels like kind of out of, it feels very independent and free-spirited.
00:36:41.572 --> 00:36:46.797
Law school, English, chemistry, medieval stick, finance.
00:36:49.197 --> 00:36:50.306
how and why.
00:36:50.306 --> 00:37:04.056
So finance, so I actually never took a finance class, but being a store manager, you have to manage the budgets, you have to manage the finances of the store.
00:37:04.056 --> 00:37:07.867
And so I think that's where the interest came.
00:37:08.186 --> 00:37:12.047
But also I've always been a money girl.
00:37:13.427 --> 00:37:17.246
I negotiated when I was 12.
00:37:17.246 --> 00:37:25.827
12 and a half, 13 with my mom that for every hundred that I got on tests, she would give me a hundred bucks.
00:37:25.887 --> 00:37:30.507
And she ended up having so good.
00:37:31.106 --> 00:37:38.467
she like, I've always been like, although I'm a good student, I'm a lazy student.
00:37:38.467 --> 00:37:46.706
And why I say that is like, I want to do as little as possible and get the highest grade possible.
00:37:46.706 --> 00:37:47.097
Right?
00:37:47.097 --> 00:37:52.989
And I know, like, you're not supposed to say that, but like, that's just who I am.
00:37:52.989 --> 00:38:00.490
And I feel like it got me, I mean, it got me through law school.
00:38:00.490 --> 00:38:02.731
Like, that's just how I've lived my life.
00:38:02.731 --> 00:38:16.338
Like, I never spent a lot of time studying, but if I'm like, I pay attention in class, I'm engaged, I always do the reading, because I'm a fast reader, and I have really good.
00:38:16.338 --> 00:38:18.311
reading comprehension skills, right?
00:38:18.311 --> 00:38:30.159
And so like for me, it's like, I'm the kid that has to show up to class because I need to like ask my questions because I don't want to teach myself anything.
00:38:30.159 --> 00:38:32.822
Like that's just, it's like.
00:38:32.822 --> 00:38:35.268
Like you've already got this time reserved to learn it.
00:38:35.268 --> 00:38:36.552
It's in class.
00:38:36.552 --> 00:38:37.804
I'm going to do it now.
00:38:37.804 --> 00:38:38.394
How smart.
00:38:38.394 --> 00:38:40.349
I wish I would have thought of that.
00:38:40.349 --> 00:38:45.836
I gotta go make money when I'm not out in class, which is kind of my mindset.
00:38:45.836 --> 00:38:53.335
And I feel like even in college, they let me get away with that where like, remember like not so.
00:38:53.335 --> 00:38:54.893
they let you get away with it.
00:38:54.893 --> 00:38:56.608
I don't think that's what they were doing.
00:38:56.608 --> 00:38:58.460
I think you were just a good student.
00:38:58.460 --> 00:39:05.661
why I say that is like, like every college has attendance policies, right?
00:39:05.681 --> 00:39:23.646
But they didn't always apply to me because if I wasn't gonna like, I would like give my professors notice, like I'd be like, I'm not gonna be in class for the next like three weeks, because like, it was like a busy time at work or something.
00:39:24.047 --> 00:39:50.739
And then I'd be like, But please find attached the like next like two to three assignments and they were just like Let me like even on stuff They hadn't taught sometimes because like they hadn't gotten to that in the lesson but it was like something I had learned before and could like write at that level and so like it's Talking about loopholes and so was like on the one hand.
00:39:50.739 --> 00:40:04.221
I feel like some of them were kind of like Here she goes again But like, no one ever like pulled me aside except for one professor and I think she just like, there's always that one, right?
00:40:04.221 --> 00:40:06.199
Where it's like, you need to be here.
00:40:06.199 --> 00:40:16.155
And I was like, I was like, thank you, but don't like penalize me because I did it by without coming to class.
00:40:16.155 --> 00:40:17.465
Like that's not cool, right?
00:40:17.465 --> 00:40:24.746
Cause like we're in college to learn and if I'm learning and showing you that I'm meeting the milestones.
00:40:24.922 --> 00:40:35.753
Or at least, to me, the very minimum, if you're giving me an A, it means I've surpassed basic expectations.
00:40:35.753 --> 00:40:42.269
That's really terrible.
00:40:42.269 --> 00:40:45.242
So bad advice for college students right now.
00:40:46.016 --> 00:40:53.949
No, because the rest of the advice is show up when you can, do the reading, do the homework, and if you're gonna miss, get ahead.
00:40:53.949 --> 00:41:00.083
like show them that like you're not being a slacker and nine out of ten times you'll be rewarded, right?
00:41:00.083 --> 00:41:06.152
And so See, I just didn't show up to class and my teachers liked me less.
00:41:07.516 --> 00:41:10.121
So I think your approach is quite nice, quite nice.
00:41:10.121 --> 00:41:19.940
I mean, this was I think I had a chemistry teacher that would call on me when I'd be sleeping in her class, because I was so tired from work.
00:41:20.221 --> 00:41:22.282
she would always call on me.
00:41:22.431 --> 00:41:29.918
And I, you know, and I remember like being startled so many times.
00:41:29.918 --> 00:41:33.570
But again, because I was did the reading.
00:41:34.840 --> 00:41:40.293
And guess I was like in those lectures by osmosis sometimes.
00:41:42.916 --> 00:41:52.804
Because I definitely like would answer the questions right and then she would be annoyed that like I was able to answer the questions, you know?
00:41:52.804 --> 00:41:59.438
But like, I don't know, I think part of it is like I grew up partially in the Caribbean.
00:41:59.438 --> 00:42:02.349
learned like school was just different there.
00:42:03.536 --> 00:42:05.807
And so when I moved here, I was ahead.
00:42:05.807 --> 00:42:08.911
I was ahead by like two to three years.
00:42:09.992 --> 00:42:19.768
And so it just, I feel like the things that I learned here in the States, I ended up reinforcing so much.
00:42:19.768 --> 00:42:30.447
Like they're just things I'll never forget because I had to learn the same thing over and over again for like, you know, yeah.
00:42:30.447 --> 00:42:42.284
You know, and so imagine like having a teacher teach you the same thing over and over again like five times for five years.
00:42:43.974 --> 00:42:45.577
You're not an engaged student anymore.
00:42:45.577 --> 00:42:47.768
You're just, I've got it at this point.
00:42:47.768 --> 00:43:12.601
yeah, and that's why I did a lot of outside reading, because like that was interesting to me, like, you know, and, and so finance, finance, because, like, like I said before, I'm a money girl, like, I don't think about life from like an emotional standpoint, I actually think about it from like an economic standpoint.
00:43:13.559 --> 00:43:13.851
Mm.
00:43:13.851 --> 00:43:30.623
even policy, like every, and I've looked at policy from an economic standpoint since I was a student in like, you know, I think the first time I made an economic argument for policy, I was in probably ninth grade.
00:43:30.811 --> 00:43:34.746
And I remember people looking at me like I was crazy.
00:43:34.746 --> 00:43:36.768
People still look at me like I'm crazy now.
00:43:36.768 --> 00:43:38.378
And I'm like, don't you understand?
00:43:38.378 --> 00:43:41.820
Like you can have the...
00:43:41.864 --> 00:43:43.637
heart that bleeds the most.
00:43:43.637 --> 00:43:52.791
But if you don't have money to effect change in society and you have to rely on somebody else to fund it.
00:43:55.021 --> 00:43:55.597
That ain't it.
00:43:55.597 --> 00:43:56.782
no guarantee there.
00:43:56.782 --> 00:44:00.221
People change their mind all the time.
00:44:00.242 --> 00:44:02.186
Just look at our Congress.
00:44:04.375 --> 00:44:06.065
Can I not actually?
00:44:08.668 --> 00:44:18.905
It's wild that so young you had that realization because I think so many of us are just, my hope and dreams and persistence will impact change.
00:44:18.905 --> 00:44:21.471
And you're coming in saying, money, and money.
00:44:21.471 --> 00:44:22.891
cash.
00:44:22.990 --> 00:44:24.690
need coal hard cash.
00:44:26.070 --> 00:44:39.510
But I think, honestly, I think that comes from the pragmatic side of myself, where it's, just, I read all of those philosophers, those political philosophers and economic philosophers.
00:44:41.110 --> 00:44:45.590
Why was I reading Descartes and Hume?
00:44:45.811 --> 00:44:47.300
I don't know why.
00:44:47.300 --> 00:44:49.110
Why was I reading that?
00:44:49.731 --> 00:44:58.248
Like I want to tell myself it was interesting, but I don't know like I think it was just it was more like curiosity Like what are these people thinking?
00:44:58.248 --> 00:45:00.239
What are they talking about?
00:45:00.420 --> 00:45:06.625
And how do we apply it like everything I read I'm like, okay, how does this apply in real life?
00:45:06.625 --> 00:45:09.927
You know, like the Bible how does this apply in real life?
00:45:09.927 --> 00:45:12.289
Like, you know and trying to like see like okay.
00:45:12.289 --> 00:45:24.599
Well, that doesn't really work but like how do we like shift this from a metaphor to like, what am I supposed to be learning when I read this particular thing?
00:45:24.599 --> 00:45:25.954
And I think that's.
00:45:25.954 --> 00:45:29.519
the sweeping lesson, what can I apply to my real life?
00:45:29.621 --> 00:45:30.152
Yeah.
00:45:30.152 --> 00:45:44.891
like, and I think that's what has kind of driven my, my curiosity is like this constant me constantly like challenging what I already know by reading more and more.
00:45:44.891 --> 00:45:57.275
You know, like, I was only a philosophy minor because I wanted to learn about like, other types of like religions and all of that.
00:45:57.311 --> 00:46:05.210
And I knew I didn't have the discipline at the time or maybe even the time to do it on my own.
00:46:05.630 --> 00:46:10.811
But I could do it in school.
00:46:10.811 --> 00:46:11.570
I'm like.
00:46:11.570 --> 00:46:15.021
the school would force you, not unlike those $100 bills for the 100.
00:46:15.021 --> 00:46:16.302
I care about grades.
00:46:16.302 --> 00:46:20.655
I know people say, it's not about the grades, but it is.
00:46:21.251 --> 00:46:26.340
It matters.
00:46:26.340 --> 00:46:31.925
I graduated law school five years ago, and people are still asking for my transcript.
00:46:32.974 --> 00:46:41.360
Speaking of, you, after two side quest masters, you finally land in law school in 2017.
00:46:41.711 --> 00:47:14.090
and you can thank the people in the nonprofit finance master's program for giving me like a good boot because, you know, before that degree, it was a student who challenged me because I always ask my students, you know, the first couple of days of class, we did an exercise where they had to do like a diagnostic essay just to see their reading and writing skills.
00:47:14.110 --> 00:47:23.251
And I always just asked them where they saw themselves in five years, best case scenario, and had them write it out.
00:47:23.530 --> 00:47:34.510
And in 2015, spring 2015, a student was like, professor, what's your five year plan?
00:47:35.815 --> 00:47:39.257
And I looked at her and I was like, oops.
00:47:39.257 --> 00:47:49.181
I'm like, know, but like, remember it was like, to me that was like a nice slap.
00:47:49.181 --> 00:47:51.981
Like, wake up, what are you doing right now?
00:47:52.603 --> 00:48:00.726
And because I should have been in law school at that point and I just hadn't done it.
00:48:00.726 --> 00:48:01.862
And there were like a lot of.
00:48:01.862 --> 00:48:07.137
you think you were still scared from that gal you interviewed who was still looking for a job?
00:48:07.137 --> 00:48:10.878
Were you kind of like hesitant to jump back into that wish or?
00:48:10.878 --> 00:48:23.998
No, I think I was just comfortable because I worked really hard the first two years after I graduated from my medieval studies program.
00:48:23.998 --> 00:48:38.070
I worked really hard because I had like a full-time job that started out as like an assistant manager position ended up with like a regional recruiting manager role.
00:48:38.463 --> 00:48:42.282
You know, and I only did that work for two and a half years.
00:48:42.282 --> 00:48:44.893
And I was teaching the whole time.
00:48:44.893 --> 00:48:49.043
So I was just like busy working, working, working, working.
00:48:49.043 --> 00:48:57.907
And then I think it was spring of, yeah, spring of 2013, I told the people I was working with that.
00:48:59.559 --> 00:49:06.467
I was gonna have a four day work week and make the same amount of money that I was making at the time.
00:49:07.489 --> 00:49:10.231
And then I made it happen.
00:49:13.358 --> 00:49:18.943
Yes! because by fall of that year, I was doing that.
00:49:19.103 --> 00:49:28.483
And I literally, like I taught my classes four days a week and then I would like just pick up random odd things to do.
00:49:28.483 --> 00:49:39.902
And I'll pick the oddest thing that I ended up doing, which was I was a professional gift wrapper for billionaires on the Upper East Side.
00:49:40.382 --> 00:49:41.271
And...
00:49:41.581 --> 00:49:46.396
That sounds like such a satisfying task-oriented job.
00:49:47.918 --> 00:49:49.567
those edges, crisp.
00:49:49.567 --> 00:49:50.927
It's wonderful.
00:49:51.670 --> 00:49:52.871
It's wonderful.
00:49:52.871 --> 00:49:58.440
And I did it for like four to six weeks every fall.
00:49:59.322 --> 00:50:05.811
Made anywhere from like five to 10 grand per four years straight.
00:50:06.766 --> 00:50:09.603
I have been doing the wrong things in my life, Aabria.
00:50:10.813 --> 00:50:22.260
And then they made them, they ruined it because like, I think it was like year four, they were like, we were thinking we could like bring you on as like a full-time team member.
00:50:22.920 --> 00:50:27.262
And, and in my head, I was like, to wrap gifts?
00:50:27.664 --> 00:50:35.628
But then they like explained like, she had like different house managers and I would be one of the house managers.
00:50:35.989 --> 00:50:38.335
And I mean, don't get me wrong.
00:50:38.335 --> 00:50:41.434
It was like psychotic money.
00:50:41.434 --> 00:50:48.369
Like, I think it was like two, $250,000 a year plus bonuses.
00:50:48.369 --> 00:50:51.525
like that pay comes with a price tag.
00:50:51.525 --> 00:50:55.155
yeah, and your girl likes her freedom.
00:50:55.155 --> 00:50:59.376
So that wasn't going to be it for me.
00:50:59.376 --> 00:51:05.998
And I remember, I remember like telling them, yeah, it was year four when I finally stopped.
00:51:05.998 --> 00:51:09.380
And I remember telling them at the end, like, thank you so much.
00:51:09.380 --> 00:51:11.710
I really appreciate it.
00:51:11.710 --> 00:51:15.280
and they also wanted me to sign an NDA that year too.
00:51:15.641 --> 00:51:19.552
And I remember, I remember being like, thank you so much.
00:51:19.552 --> 00:51:21.182
This has been so great.
00:51:21.182 --> 00:51:25.023
but I'm actually gonna go to law school.
00:51:28.103 --> 00:51:33.842
And they were like, we didn't realize that you were thinking about going to law school.
00:51:33.842 --> 00:51:37.242
And I was like, yeah, know, I'm actually a professor right now.
00:51:37.242 --> 00:51:39.802
They were like, what, you're a professor?
00:51:40.322 --> 00:51:43.702
And you know, I really value my privacy.
00:51:43.702 --> 00:51:47.402
think privacy helps you have a lot of freedom too.
00:51:47.402 --> 00:51:48.967
And so...
00:51:48.967 --> 00:51:58.634
I remember when they found out all these things about me in just that one conversation, they were like, it makes sense why you wouldn't want to do this then, right?
00:51:59.755 --> 00:52:06.469
But so yeah, it was, I will say it was comfort because I was going away every January.
00:52:06.469 --> 00:52:15.806
Like I would like get my family these like lavish like Christmas presents and birthday presents because of my job as a gift wrapper.
00:52:16.286 --> 00:52:19.427
And then I would go away every January for a month.
00:52:21.047 --> 00:52:21.936
So good.
00:52:21.936 --> 00:52:23.748
it was like wonderful.
00:52:24.289 --> 00:52:31.954
And so like, extremely comfortable, you know, I was like helping my mom.
00:52:32.347 --> 00:52:39.882
I was like co parenting my younger sister with my mom at the time too, because like, her dad ended up passing away as well.
00:52:39.882 --> 00:52:44.905
And so it was like, there was just a lot of stuff happening during that time.
00:52:45.027 --> 00:52:53.275
But when that student said that to me, was like, okay, this is literally like God being like, bro, what are you doing?
00:52:53.275 --> 00:52:57.534
Like, like you need to get on with your life.
00:52:57.534 --> 00:53:07.275
And so that that that second master's was literally me being like, I don't know if I could like do like classes anymore.
00:53:07.275 --> 00:53:10.795
So I did that master's for that purpose.
00:53:11.565 --> 00:53:18.416
and it was a it also was like, I was thinking, maybe you can like start your nonprofit that you want to start.
00:53:18.416 --> 00:53:31.784
And so it was like one of those things where I was like, it's information and education you'll be able to use later, but you'll know if you could actually like make it through law school, if you can make it through this program.
00:53:31.784 --> 00:53:34.646
And so it was like an accelerated one year program.
00:53:34.646 --> 00:53:43.161
so during that program, one, I think it was my contract, it was like a contracts class that I took.
00:53:43.798 --> 00:53:47.599
And the professor, he was actually an attorney.
00:53:47.599 --> 00:53:53.333
And I remember like having office hours with him and he was kind of like, okay, so like, what are your goals?
00:53:53.333 --> 00:53:59.268
You know, and I was like telling him, you know, I'm like thinking about law school, but I'm doing this.
00:53:59.268 --> 00:54:12.670
And he was like, okay, that sounds great, but your responses in my class look like what the JD students, which are like law school students should be doing.
00:54:12.670 --> 00:54:18.710
And so like, if you want to go to law school, you just need to go to law school and stop wasting time.
00:54:21.170 --> 00:54:24.791
I was like, okay.
00:54:24.791 --> 00:54:31.951
And so, yes, I had to retake the LSAC because I had dilly dallyed a little too long at that point.
00:54:31.951 --> 00:54:42.775
And then I applied to law school, fall of 2016 was when I submitted applications and got into like four of them.
00:54:43.463 --> 00:54:47.719
chose Brooklyn Law School because they had a two-year program.
00:54:47.719 --> 00:54:54.039
And if I am a money girl, I'm definitely a time girl.
00:54:54.882 --> 00:54:58.592
There's some pragmatism in there as well, right?
00:54:58.592 --> 00:55:01.501
Like shorter money, get it done.
00:55:01.501 --> 00:55:03.570
You've been waiting a long time to start.
00:55:03.570 --> 00:55:07.811
and so was one of those things where I was like, you just you cannot delay it.
00:55:07.811 --> 00:55:10.030
Just like get it over with.
00:55:10.110 --> 00:55:19.311
And I knew whether I did a two or three year program, I was not going to be able to work like full time eight hours.
00:55:19.311 --> 00:55:57.632
And so that year leading up to law school, I ended up getting a random store manager retail position for a high end brand to save money to save more money to to help me yeah to pay for to like just pick up wherever but i i still knew like i knew i was gonna have to take out loans and i was like but you need to have money in your coifers like you can't you can't like just go in there blind and just take as many loans as you want No, you're not doing that.
00:55:57.632 --> 00:56:06.985
So like that for me started like doing that to your program, which they don't they don't have it anymore.
00:56:06.985 --> 00:56:11.097
I don't think any of the law schools that ended up doing it have it anymore.
00:56:11.197 --> 00:56:20.940
But like that was I think maybe it was just invented for that time so that I would like go and get my like.
00:56:22.121 --> 00:56:23.931
Yeah, like it was like if.
00:56:23.931 --> 00:56:24.581
it.
00:56:25.163 --> 00:56:33.824
Like, like God and the angels got together and they were like, if we don't get this set up the right way, she's going to find an excuse not to go again.
00:56:33.826 --> 00:56:36.666
And so like, I just ran with it.
00:56:36.666 --> 00:56:38.882
And I remember like quitting.
00:56:38.882 --> 00:56:46.809
I remember, I remember thinking I was going to like stay with that like retail job, like longer than I ended up staying.
00:56:47.710 --> 00:56:52.431
And the only reason I was going to stay, I think like three or four months longer.
00:56:52.572 --> 00:57:02.349
And it was mostly because I felt a little bit guilty about abandoning them after I'd like we'd like built something really cool together.
00:57:03.530 --> 00:57:12.275
But when I told the manager, like the regional manager about it, she was like nice to me to my face.
00:57:12.496 --> 00:57:19.960
But then she like told my staff that I don't know what I'm getting myself into.
00:57:21.003 --> 00:57:24.987
And she hopes You're like, no, no, I have a pretty great idea actually.
00:57:24.987 --> 00:57:26.367
make it.
00:57:26.367 --> 00:57:28.507
And then they told me that.
00:57:28.507 --> 00:57:35.106
And I was like, And I was rearranging my life to be able to help them.
00:57:35.106 --> 00:57:40.586
And I remember just reaching out to her and being like, hey, I thought about it.
00:57:40.586 --> 00:57:43.266
And it actually just makes sense for me to be done.
00:57:43.266 --> 00:57:47.746
And I inserted the date and ended it.
00:57:47.827 --> 00:57:51.934
And I think maybe that was the last time I was loyal.
00:57:52.190 --> 00:57:53.931
to a job like that.
00:57:56.594 --> 00:58:13.085
You know, and I had to, you know, cause like, think up until even like being a professor that long, like it was just this like sense of loyalty that I had to my employers, but also to the students too.
00:58:13.085 --> 00:58:21.086
Like I feel like I created this like false sense of duty in being there to.
00:58:21.086 --> 00:58:25.846
to maybe avoid life, to avoid being a grown up.
00:58:26.135 --> 00:58:28.836
Well, speaking of life, it comes at you fast.
00:58:28.836 --> 00:58:33.427
And while you're in law school, your journey line is so interesting.
00:58:33.427 --> 00:58:41.490
We have two thirds of the things below the journey line happen in your two year law school.
00:58:42.550 --> 00:58:46.302
You're hit by a car and then we go up and you're a summer associate.
00:58:46.302 --> 00:58:49.813
And then we go down again because you have a mask removed.
00:58:49.914 --> 00:58:51.534
What the hell?
00:58:52.284 --> 00:58:54.068
That year was so annoying.
00:58:55.851 --> 00:59:04.876
That fear was so annoying! I mean, so I was literally well on my way, right?
00:59:04.876 --> 00:59:07.858
Like it was like I finally got a groove.
00:59:07.858 --> 00:59:11.701
I found out about like big law opportunities.
00:59:11.701 --> 00:59:15.402
I went into law school as a public interest fellow.
00:59:16.864 --> 00:59:25.170
And then like the smartest kid in our like class, he cornered me in the elevator one night.
00:59:25.170 --> 00:59:27.103
We're like headed to like property.
00:59:27.103 --> 00:59:27.987
class together.
00:59:27.987 --> 00:59:29.385
I shouldn't say he cornered me.
00:59:29.385 --> 00:59:31.547
We just ended up in the elevator together.
00:59:31.547 --> 00:59:33.429
So dramatic.
00:59:33.429 --> 00:59:39.083
And he like looks me in the face and he's like, so you're going to be doing big law too, right?
00:59:39.083 --> 00:59:49.184
I didn't know what he was talking about, but I thought to myself, well, he is certainly threatened that I'm going to be doing whatever it is this is.
00:59:49.184 --> 00:59:51.867
And so I said, sure looks like it.
00:59:52.798 --> 00:59:58.458
And then I like just, and then I was just quiet the rest of the ride, right?
00:59:58.458 --> 01:00:05.818
Hop out, go to the bathroom, take out my phone, Google what's big law.
01:00:06.818 --> 01:00:08.333
So ashamed.
01:00:08.333 --> 01:00:11.336
sure looks like it after I figure out what it looks like.
01:00:11.336 --> 01:00:15.208
And I remember seeing that, like what that was.
01:00:15.208 --> 01:00:23.614
And like I had heard about like corporate law and like top law firms, but like I didn't really know about the salary.
01:00:24.614 --> 01:00:30.737
looking back, I'm like, for a money girl, the fact that you didn't know about this is really hilarious.
01:00:30.737 --> 01:00:39.922
But I think for me, going into law school was more about getting my piece of paper than it was about getting money.
01:00:40.742 --> 01:00:44.324
because I knew and I, right?
01:00:44.324 --> 01:00:59.251
And so, but I knew with that piece of paper, I can get, I could guarantee myself at least$100,000 a year, which like in New York City, for the average person is not a lot of money.
01:00:59.251 --> 01:01:05.965
But for somebody like me who can like commit to eating rice and beans forever, it can be a lot.
01:01:06.416 --> 01:01:19.438
And so, and so like it was one of those things where that's why public interest looked interesting to me because I thought well I could do this but I can do like all my other odd things that I do anyway, you know.
01:01:19.547 --> 01:01:28.806
And I find out about this opportunity that's available and I look it up and I'm just kind of like wait what?
01:01:28.806 --> 01:01:32.469
They're paying people 40 grand to work for 10 weeks?
01:01:32.769 --> 01:01:33.900
How do I get this?
01:01:33.900 --> 01:01:34.690
I need to...
01:01:34.690 --> 01:01:38.117
I need to look into that! associate role.
01:01:38.117 --> 01:01:41.619
And I remember being like, we're getting one of those.
01:01:41.619 --> 01:01:50.864
And I wasn't even thinking like, I know people are to be so mad when they see this podcast, but, but, I'm okay with that.
01:01:50.864 --> 01:01:52.215
They're, they're already mad.
01:01:52.215 --> 01:01:54.085
This was as making more.
01:01:54.965 --> 01:02:06.579
And so like it, what was really funny and fun for me about it was I thought, girl, you're probably gonna work hard anyway.
01:02:07.978 --> 01:02:15.798
So if they're gonna pay you to work hard, you should at least try.
01:02:16.099 --> 01:02:29.338
And so like, I found out about it with enough time to make sure my grades were in line with what they were looking for, right?
01:02:29.338 --> 01:02:42.773
And so like, I think like my first semester grades, I had like a B plus average, which really annoyed me, even though I already told you I don't really work that hard.
01:02:42.773 --> 01:02:53.740
And so I was mad, but I think I was more annoyed when I found out that I could get a raw score of a 90 or better and still end up with a B plus.
01:02:53.740 --> 01:02:57.523
Like, it just didn't feel like justice to me.
01:02:57.523 --> 01:03:03.086
And I was in law school and I thought law school was about, I thought law school was about justice.
01:03:03.132 --> 01:03:11.610
And then they explained the curve to me and I was like, so like you guys only give out like X amount of A's?
01:03:12.050 --> 01:03:13.851
I was not aware of that.
01:03:13.891 --> 01:03:19.956
And so I literally made sure and they did like a percentage.
01:03:19.976 --> 01:03:31.806
And so for the rest of law school, I don't think I ever took a class that had less than like 50 people in it because I knew I could like keep doing.
01:03:32.518 --> 01:04:08.648
my current system of being a student and get and and for me like like people they're like they need the a plus like i was not that kid i just need it to start with a so it could be a minus it could be a it could be a plus i don't care as long as that letter has a like my name we're cool and so like i remember like doing the math and thinking okay well this class is like 100 people, they can only give out like 12 A's in this class.
01:04:09.389 --> 01:04:11.510
I think I could be one of those A's.
01:04:12.150 --> 01:04:17.244
And I would just sign, like I literally chose my classes in that way.
01:04:17.244 --> 01:04:29.885
And so I remember my GPA jumped so that I had like an A minus average by the end of my second semester.
01:04:30.246 --> 01:04:31.996
And then I got hit by a car.
01:04:33.907 --> 01:04:34.702
Jesus.
01:04:34.702 --> 01:04:36.487
Like a month later.
01:04:37.293 --> 01:04:40.788
And you're like, crush it, I genuinely forgot for a second.
01:04:40.788 --> 01:04:42.262
And you're like, yeah, I'm doing so great.
01:04:42.262 --> 01:04:43.465
And then I got hit by a car.
01:04:43.465 --> 01:04:53.251
then no, and for me, like, I think that's why, and that was like February 2nd, 2018, most annoying day of my life.
01:04:54.306 --> 01:04:55.722
Were you in a car?
01:04:55.722 --> 01:04:57.503
Were you not in a car?
01:04:57.503 --> 01:04:58.463
How?
01:04:58.918 --> 01:05:01.175
my- class.
01:05:02.239 --> 01:05:06.005
And yeah, no, it was it was crazy.
01:05:08.679 --> 01:05:12.650
It's like, it's like the car bounced off of me, man.
01:05:14.030 --> 01:05:15.836
think you might have bounced off of the car.
01:05:15.836 --> 01:05:17.135
I didn't fall.
01:05:18.233 --> 01:05:19.186
that's nice.
01:05:19.802 --> 01:05:28.934
And like, I used to think so, but like the pain that persists as a result of me not falling.
01:05:30.641 --> 01:05:32.192
It's kind of incredible.
01:05:32.192 --> 01:05:49.146
Like it's funny when I think about like that day, although I think if I had fallen, I wouldn't be here because I don't think he would have stopped because I think the person was on their cell phone at the time.
01:05:49.487 --> 01:05:52.289
And they just turned into me.
01:05:53.391 --> 01:05:56.041
And so like, I was, it's funny.
01:05:56.041 --> 01:05:59.414
It would have been a funnier story if I was headed to Torts.
01:05:59.795 --> 01:06:04.976
But I was, torts, they do like personal injury stuff in torts law.
01:06:06.498 --> 01:06:19.385
So like, that would have made it like, for me, like, it's like the only thing that I'm like, if I could change a fact about that day, it would have been I was like headed to torts and then I got hit by a car.
01:06:20.146 --> 01:06:23.206
But I was headed to contracts.
01:06:26.730 --> 01:06:28.789
No, it's good, no it's good.
01:06:29.905 --> 01:06:47.260
And so like my professors, had to like figure out and I'm so grateful for them because they ended up figuring out how to help me in my quest to not take a leave of absence.
01:06:48.579 --> 01:06:51.521
Because I was just kind of like, I only have two years.
01:06:51.521 --> 01:07:07.893
I'm not extending, I didn't want to extend my time in law school because like, I was already on the two year pay structure and too much money had already been spent kind of thing.
01:07:10.059 --> 01:07:10.998
No.
01:07:11.240 --> 01:07:12.481
I am...
01:07:13.559 --> 01:07:15.211
Were you dealing with injuries?
01:07:15.211 --> 01:07:16.664
Like, how were you managing?
01:07:16.664 --> 01:07:18.967
Were you scared to walk to class again?
01:07:18.967 --> 01:07:19.889
having...
01:07:23.400 --> 01:07:40.478
four bulged discs in my neck and three in my lower back and a bruised sacrum so it hurt to sit and lay down.
01:07:41.878 --> 01:07:53.322
And so sometimes I would have to like stand in the middle of class and some people were smart enough to know that like something was going on that was probably none of their business.
01:07:53.626 --> 01:07:59.760
And then there were people who would like come and be like, why don't you just find another chair?
01:07:59.760 --> 01:08:00.932
And it's like.
01:08:02.594 --> 01:08:05.483
You are not one of the 12 A's, are you, huh?
01:08:05.628 --> 01:08:07.800
You know, yeah.
01:08:07.800 --> 01:08:13.429
so, but like, I will say, like, I remember when I told, I told, I think it was my con law professor.
01:08:13.429 --> 01:08:14.268
Yeah, it was him.
01:08:14.268 --> 01:08:17.984
I told him about what happened.
01:08:18.078 --> 01:08:22.002
And he was like, no, we need to get you accommodations.
01:08:22.002 --> 01:08:30.670
And I think probably for the first time in my law school's history, they recorded all of the classes that I was in.
01:08:32.198 --> 01:08:33.534
And.
01:08:33.770 --> 01:08:35.207
Great accommodation.
01:08:35.207 --> 01:08:38.198
and every student got the benefit of it.
01:08:39.212 --> 01:08:40.061
Yes.
01:08:40.262 --> 01:08:41.203
Yes.
01:08:41.524 --> 01:08:46.961
Normally how that works when we do inclusive things, everyone benefits from it.
01:08:46.961 --> 01:08:54.693
And it was like, and I remember when I stopped being like a big baby about the whole thing.
01:08:56.470 --> 01:09:06.216
It was when I realized how, like I've never had any physical issues my whole life, right?
01:09:06.536 --> 01:09:16.671
And so like, as much as I think I'm aware and I'm like always paying attention to people, like I know I've definitely missed it before.
01:09:16.671 --> 01:09:37.211
this happened to me, but it raised my awareness like so much that now like if I'm headed anywhere, I'm thinking, wait, they haven't considered people who might be in a wheelchair, like how are they gonna get in here?
01:09:37.211 --> 01:09:45.261
Like I'm thinking about, it's like, I feel like I've always thought about like people with mental illness or.
01:09:45.560 --> 01:09:50.573
you know, or neurodivergent, you know, personalities, right.
01:09:50.573 --> 01:09:54.573
But I've, it's so crazy when I think about it.
01:09:55.993 --> 01:10:07.478
I didn't really consider physical disability nearly as much until after, until after, right.
01:10:07.478 --> 01:10:09.297
And yeah.
01:10:10.378 --> 01:10:11.338
Yeah.
01:10:11.338 --> 01:10:11.863
Yeah.
01:10:11.863 --> 01:10:13.804
you have another thing.
01:10:13.831 --> 01:10:14.712
exactly.
01:10:14.712 --> 01:10:21.454
so like, for me, like, it like I remember I had a coach in high school.
01:10:21.815 --> 01:10:26.198
She called me Arugula because she like she just couldn't say my name.
01:10:26.278 --> 01:10:29.279
And so it's like really terrible.
01:10:29.279 --> 01:10:31.381
And I love he's lit.
01:10:31.381 --> 01:10:33.046
I know my name is like super easy.
01:10:33.046 --> 01:10:35.871
I think she just loved calling me Arugula.
01:10:35.871 --> 01:10:37.661
So we'll go with that.
01:10:37.661 --> 01:10:45.622
And she used to always say to us that our team was as strong as the weakest link.
01:10:47.198 --> 01:10:52.755
And I started thinking about that statement.
01:10:55.302 --> 01:10:56.944
I got hit by a car.
01:10:58.587 --> 01:11:12.059
Being hit by a car actually ended up being more of a blessing than it was a curse because as they were doing all of these MRIs and CAT scans, they stumbled upon this mass.
01:11:13.777 --> 01:11:29.046
And so I actually found out about the mass about a month after I got hit by a The hits keep on coming! I remember being like, God, are you for real?
01:11:29.046 --> 01:11:30.707
What is your problem?
01:11:30.707 --> 01:11:34.046
Are you mad at me because I took forever to come back here?
01:11:34.046 --> 01:11:35.867
What is your deal?
01:11:38.207 --> 01:11:46.447
Give me a break, And it really did.
01:11:46.447 --> 01:11:51.117
felt like, I used this image earlier this year.
01:11:51.117 --> 01:11:53.082
I felt like I was an ant.
01:11:53.082 --> 01:11:58.086
under Billy's magnifying glass in the height of summer.
01:11:58.206 --> 01:12:02.047
Like that's how I felt during that time.
01:12:02.507 --> 01:12:21.399
And, and you know, I think rightfully so, you know, but what was really, again, it was like all of these crazy things, like really negative things were happening simultaneously.
01:12:21.567 --> 01:12:30.686
It was like, remember talking to my doctor and him being like, my God, we need to check that and like, get in on it.
01:12:30.686 --> 01:12:37.425
you know, like, I mean, I've been, I think I've been seeing my doc, my OBGYN since I was.
01:12:38.911 --> 01:12:44.440
22 and he had to have been like 26, 27.
01:12:44.440 --> 01:12:48.220
Like I was like one of his like first patients he ever had kind of thing.
01:12:48.220 --> 01:12:57.591
And so it was like one of those things where it was like in my mind being like, this is why I still come to you because like you take care of me.
01:12:58.180 --> 01:13:05.131
and then his mentor ended up being the surgeon that took the mass out.
01:13:05.751 --> 01:13:15.609
And if I don't know if I would have been able to have his mentor do that for me if he wasn't my doctor.
01:13:16.070 --> 01:13:24.248
Because he normally had like a four month wait for an appointment and I was able to have an appointment in a week.
01:13:26.298 --> 01:13:34.029
And he examined me and he was like, listen, we can get you in and take it out.
01:13:34.029 --> 01:13:36.771
And he was like, we can have a date within a month.
01:13:36.771 --> 01:13:38.953
I checked my schedule already.
01:13:39.114 --> 01:13:44.201
But that would have been in the middle of a very critical semester for me.
01:13:47.242 --> 01:13:50.233
I mean, school comes first, clearly.
01:13:50.233 --> 01:13:51.634
like totally right.
01:13:51.634 --> 01:14:05.805
Totally and it was really funny because he was kind of like, well, we can put you on some hormones so that it doesn't grow anymore because we determined that it wasn't malignant.
01:14:06.448 --> 01:14:10.690
But it was just obstructing my digestion.
01:14:12.694 --> 01:14:13.854
It's causing problems.
01:14:13.854 --> 01:14:15.176
Like everything.
01:14:15.176 --> 01:14:16.667
It was a pain, right?
01:14:16.667 --> 01:14:23.860
And so like, but he ended, we ended up like, and I was like, well, how long can I like keep this thing in me realistically?
01:14:24.801 --> 01:14:30.154
And you know, and he was like, well, you can wait until after you graduate if you wanted to.
01:14:30.154 --> 01:14:36.488
I wouldn't recommend it, but you could if you're okay with like having this discomfort.
01:14:37.007 --> 01:14:40.689
And so I just, I let it rip.
01:14:40.689 --> 01:14:41.850
And so.
01:14:42.302 --> 01:14:52.881
I knew it was crazy because like I knew for a year and a half before that thing came out of me that it was in me.
01:14:52.881 --> 01:14:55.798
a ticking time bomb just chilling inside of you.
01:14:55.798 --> 01:14:58.520
and it was the size of a softball.
01:14:59.532 --> 01:15:00.987
Ooh, good size.
01:15:01.150 --> 01:15:02.911
Yeah, it huge.
01:15:03.671 --> 01:15:10.190
But I ended up getting 12 interviews for Big Law opportunities.
01:15:12.533 --> 01:15:14.948
You and your tumor, taking on the world.
01:15:15.563 --> 01:15:18.826
I ended up doing like a China abroad thing.
01:15:18.826 --> 01:15:47.930
I did like a China abroad thing that like that same It's so crazy like that six month period is bananas Because I get hit by a car Find out about this mass go to China Get these 12 interviews Get callbacks get a gig at like a magic circle firm, you know, and It's like a top It was like a top UK firm that like nobody ever heard of.
01:15:47.930 --> 01:15:49.579
But I was like, I like that name.
01:15:49.579 --> 01:15:51.001
I think I'm gonna work there.
01:15:51.001 --> 01:15:53.541
And so it was my first choice.
01:15:54.162 --> 01:15:57.073
The first firm I worked at was my first choice firm.
01:15:57.073 --> 01:16:04.925
And as soon as their offer came, actually, let me not lie.
01:16:05.465 --> 01:16:13.527
As soon as I met those people, I convinced myself that they loved me as much as I loved them.
01:16:13.831 --> 01:16:17.261
And I did not take any further interviews.
01:16:17.524 --> 01:16:20.060
Because I don't like to waste people's time.
01:16:20.845 --> 01:16:22.975
Hold move.
01:16:22.975 --> 01:16:31.059
And my career services advisor almost had a heart attack because she was kind of like, girl, nobody does that.
01:16:31.059 --> 01:16:32.810
And I was like, we'll be fine.
01:16:32.810 --> 01:16:33.699
Don't worry.
01:16:33.699 --> 01:16:35.280
We'll be okay.
01:16:35.900 --> 01:16:38.801
And a week later I got my call.
01:16:39.002 --> 01:16:49.247
And by then that was like, I think the second to last week in August, like we had just gotten back to school for the fall and...
01:16:49.444 --> 01:16:54.923
I was walking in the courtyard, got a call from that firm telling me, I was like, yeah.
01:16:54.923 --> 01:16:57.375
They were like, we just want to welcome you.
01:16:57.375 --> 01:17:01.149
And I remember being like, yes, it's that.
01:17:01.149 --> 01:17:02.672
celebrating in the quad.
01:17:02.672 --> 01:17:07.305
I feel like that's like a 90s movie moment of you just...
01:17:07.591 --> 01:17:12.793
and I actually did it too, which was like, look back, I'm like, who are you like early?
01:17:13.033 --> 01:17:21.478
But it was so like, I mean, it was like, almost like, yes, like things are finally going in the direction that they need to go kind of thing.
01:17:21.478 --> 01:17:25.460
And I feel like it did like it was just thing.
01:17:25.460 --> 01:17:30.462
It was just smooth sailing my second year of law school.
01:17:30.521 --> 01:17:33.542
And then I graduated high summer.
01:17:34.556 --> 01:17:36.793
My cousin finally got married.
01:17:38.154 --> 01:17:39.595
Congrats, cuz.
01:17:39.658 --> 01:17:44.780
And you stay at Allen and Overy for a while after your summer associates.
01:17:44.780 --> 01:17:46.470
so I ended up, it's crazy.
01:17:46.470 --> 01:18:00.650
So I ended up taking, they wanted me to start right away after I did the summer associate thing, but because I had delayed getting the surgery, I had to postpone that.
01:18:00.850 --> 01:18:07.310
And so I remember when I had those conversations with them, they were like, okay, no problem.
01:18:07.451 --> 01:18:12.978
And the fact that they even asked me to start right away.
01:18:13.853 --> 01:18:17.404
was something that like never happens.
01:18:17.463 --> 01:18:24.065
But because I had already graduated at that point, they were willing to make an exception.
01:18:24.265 --> 01:18:46.613
And so like they ultimately in my book, like they solidified themselves as a really good place to work because they were so accommodating and not in a way like I think there's like levels of accommodations where...
01:18:49.533 --> 01:18:58.520
As somebody who has had accommodations since this accident, I think that...
01:19:00.393 --> 01:19:08.905
There are a lot of people that have expectations of the workplace that just can't be met.
01:19:10.046 --> 01:19:11.587
They just can't be.
01:19:12.688 --> 01:19:21.872
And you kind of have to get creative about how you get those things met, right?
01:19:21.872 --> 01:19:28.582
Whether it's like negotiating it, because there's just no playbook for it, right?
01:19:28.582 --> 01:19:35.962
And it's so it's like doing it in a way that gets you the yes rather than a no.
01:19:36.353 --> 01:19:37.875
Yeah.
01:19:37.875 --> 01:19:44.203
I think going in with like your fist almost never gets you what you want.
01:19:44.203 --> 01:19:46.984
It certainly hasn't gotten me what I wanted.
01:19:48.087 --> 01:19:55.502
I mean, coming from the HR side of it, definitely like, I like honey more than fists, you know?
01:19:55.884 --> 01:20:03.911
And I think, you know, it's on the HR partner to be collaborative and responsive and listen, but yeah, make accommodations.
01:20:03.911 --> 01:20:08.073
Because as we already learned, they're probably gonna help more people than just the one.
01:20:08.859 --> 01:20:20.532
you know, and so for me, like, you know, I just want to plug them because like, feel like Like, I know that that's not how it is.
01:20:20.532 --> 01:20:26.069
Like there were just things at that organization that were just standard.
01:20:27.152 --> 01:20:29.935
Like you didn't need an accommodation letter.
01:20:29.935 --> 01:20:35.363
You didn't have to bring in your private doctors.
01:20:35.511 --> 01:20:37.353
Doctor Medical Records.
01:20:37.353 --> 01:20:37.994
Oof.
01:20:37.994 --> 01:20:45.478
like they just, it was just like some of this stuff was just standard, right?
01:20:45.679 --> 01:21:02.305
And I think when you're coming from a place of true inclusivity, you're thinking from the lens of we're only as good as our weakest link.
01:21:03.126 --> 01:21:10.198
And if the organization happens to be the weakest link, in that scenario, that's a problem.
01:21:13.158 --> 01:21:13.563
I love that.
01:21:13.563 --> 01:21:15.099
That's a mic drop.
01:21:16.180 --> 01:21:17.912
Well, you stay there for a while.
01:21:17.912 --> 01:21:19.533
You do your summer associate there.
01:21:19.533 --> 01:21:23.105
You're there for another two years post-grad.
01:21:24.863 --> 01:21:28.737
And then you move on to a new associate role.
01:21:29.618 --> 01:21:32.541
Keep stacking up.
01:21:33.481 --> 01:21:36.864
Tell me about the, we're towards the end of your journey line.
01:21:36.864 --> 01:21:42.369
Tell me what's ending and I'm excited about your last block and what's happening next.
01:21:42.800 --> 01:21:47.782
so I always wanted to be like, it's funny.
01:21:47.782 --> 01:21:56.244
Like I did have that blip where I wanted to be a brain surgeon, but I have childhood memories of wanting to be a lawyer.
01:21:56.546 --> 01:22:00.827
I've always been obsessed with like legal shows.
01:22:00.828 --> 01:22:09.291
To this day, like I'm like, so like if there's something about the law happening in the show or the movie.
01:22:09.860 --> 01:22:14.113
even if I've seen it a thousand times, I will sit there and watch it again.
01:22:14.135 --> 01:22:16.426
Like, it's that, like, for me.
01:22:16.426 --> 01:22:26.764
And it's crazy because most legal shows are about litigation, but I ended up becoming a transactional attorney.
01:22:26.805 --> 01:22:33.511
And again, that was actually a very intentional, strategic move for me.
01:22:33.971 --> 01:22:38.284
And it was a form of activism for me as well.
01:22:38.559 --> 01:22:46.738
because there aren't a lot of women, black women, doing finance.
01:22:47.319 --> 01:23:00.538
And it was something I was just naturally good at because no schooling, but the more I heard the concepts, they just kind of stuck to me like glue.
01:23:00.538 --> 01:23:05.430
I would think about it in a very just...
01:23:06.483 --> 01:23:21.748
just Broadway, like I'd get into the nitty gritty, but I'd also look at the big pictures while like it just always excited me in a way that even like, I remember asking myself sometimes like, are you for real right now?
01:23:21.748 --> 01:23:23.699
Like, why are you this excited about this?
01:23:23.699 --> 01:23:30.733
Like, this is like, like not even the people that have been doing this for 20 years are excited, like calm down.
01:23:31.512 --> 01:23:35.734
You know, but it just really excited me as it.
01:23:35.856 --> 01:23:55.762
It's funny because like I will never I know you're not supposed to say that It's very, very, very, very, very unlikely that you will ever catch me outside at a rally.
01:23:57.229 --> 01:23:57.858
Mmm.
01:23:57.858 --> 01:23:59.793
just not my ministry.
01:24:01.119 --> 01:24:03.836
It takes all types.
01:24:03.836 --> 01:24:08.970
Some are loud, some are out there, and some gotta work behind the scenes.
01:24:08.970 --> 01:24:19.490
And so like, when I was a professor, I could have tried to go and work at like an NYU, especially after I got my experience.
01:24:19.490 --> 01:24:30.150
I could have tried to like go to one of these other places, but I stayed with CUNY because I got to work with first-generation kids a lot of the times.
01:24:30.150 --> 01:24:32.788
I'm first-generation everything.
01:24:33.212 --> 01:24:35.762
I got to work with black women.
01:24:35.762 --> 01:24:41.747
I got to work with immigrant kids.
01:24:41.747 --> 01:24:55.063
so them seeing me and me being able to help them get what they wanted for me was always more important than me going.
01:24:55.063 --> 01:24:56.993
To me, I could be loud.
01:24:56.993 --> 01:25:01.832
I could be that person that is on the TV.
01:25:01.832 --> 01:25:10.238
I can do all that, but for me it's like I'm more interested in getting and people don't like this sometimes.
01:25:10.238 --> 01:25:14.684
I want bodies in the Mmm, okay.
01:25:15.127 --> 01:25:15.969
I'm here for it.
01:25:15.969 --> 01:25:16.716
Bring them together.
01:25:16.716 --> 01:25:26.582
you know, like I know there's been like this, I like really hate this quote, like, surround yourself with people who talk about you in the room.
01:25:28.990 --> 01:25:30.770
I'm not very trusting.
01:25:31.211 --> 01:25:34.511
So I want to be in the room.
01:25:34.511 --> 01:25:46.038
And I want to and for me, it's like I would rather have you come in the room and speak for yourself than pretend that I have the ability to speak for you.
01:25:47.484 --> 01:25:48.519
I love that.
01:25:48.635 --> 01:26:06.865
And so like for me embodying that was being a finance attorney, being the only dark skinned black person and like there were always people that identified as black but like they had to tell you.
01:26:07.667 --> 01:26:16.735
I don't have to tell you that there has to be some African in me, right?
01:26:16.735 --> 01:26:18.716
Like you just see it.
01:26:18.938 --> 01:26:23.961
And so in fact, I might have to explain the other parts of me more.
01:26:24.722 --> 01:26:39.634
And so, you know, which is why I always check the black box because it's like, it's just easier for me where I'm like, now I don't have to like, go through my whole family tree and show you where all the intersections happen.
01:26:40.775 --> 01:26:44.297
no one deserves to know all of that when they first meet, y'know?
01:26:44.297 --> 01:26:46.688
Like, it's a nuanced conversation.
01:26:46.688 --> 01:26:50.128
Like, people are trying to figure out their own family dreams, you know?
01:26:50.128 --> 01:26:59.900
And so, and for me, it's like, I actually like, I think I, I think I'm like most other black people in that way.
01:26:59.900 --> 01:27:04.332
Like, it's just the embodiment, right?
01:27:04.332 --> 01:27:12.173
And so one of my goals was people would see my face as a finance attorney.
01:27:12.390 --> 01:27:17.426
and they were in law school and they would think, that's an option.
01:27:18.862 --> 01:27:19.845
Hell yeah.
01:27:20.618 --> 01:27:21.515
That's an option.
01:27:21.515 --> 01:27:22.216
an option.
01:27:22.216 --> 01:27:24.935
Like you don't have to do it, but that's an option.
01:27:24.935 --> 01:27:32.868
And, and what I loved about the first room I worked at was they let me play a little bit when I first started.
01:27:32.868 --> 01:27:35.930
So I didn't just do finance work.
01:27:35.930 --> 01:27:40.841
got to do like some capital markets, like, you know, securities type work.
01:27:41.480 --> 01:27:44.731
but they like really valued pro bono work as well.
01:27:44.731 --> 01:27:48.479
So I got to do like immigration law stuff.
01:27:48.479 --> 01:27:51.738
help do memos for the litigation department.
01:27:51.738 --> 01:27:56.958
So I got to do a lot of cool things while working with them.
01:27:57.099 --> 01:28:08.359
And so my face ended up being in a lot of places, doing a lot of things, showing the different options that are available to you.
01:28:08.819 --> 01:28:25.395
And so for me, I can't afford to be in a box because I think part of my reason for being is to just show people.
01:28:27.016 --> 01:28:29.670
that they're possible?
01:28:31.577 --> 01:28:34.967
and like, and just be that for them.
01:28:35.208 --> 01:28:48.873
And like, it takes sacrifice because like sometimes I just want to go on a road trip and like live my life and not be visible and be visible.
01:28:49.734 --> 01:29:00.458
Which is why when I'm not online or, you know, in public, I spend a lot of time alone or just with immediate family.
01:29:00.606 --> 01:29:07.966
because I'm like, you can't be public all the time, Juan.
01:29:08.646 --> 01:29:10.846
Yeah, yeah.
01:29:11.546 --> 01:29:12.886
Exactly.
01:29:12.886 --> 01:29:16.997
And you kind of, and like for me, like I have to live my own life too.
01:29:16.997 --> 01:29:26.103
And so it's like balancing this like new evolved form of activism where it's like.
01:29:28.070 --> 01:29:43.385
When I left law last year, you know, I left because I had come to a crossroads where I was going to have to fight to stay.
01:29:44.225 --> 01:29:51.534
But I shouldn't have had to fight to stay.
01:29:52.715 --> 01:29:59.494
It was one of those things where I just decided I'm not gonna fight.
01:29:59.835 --> 01:30:04.515
I'm just gonna see how far you will take it.
01:30:04.515 --> 01:30:15.479
And however far you decide to take it, I hope you're willing to deal with whatever consequences come as a result of.
01:30:16.636 --> 01:30:18.567
the actions that you take.
01:30:19.448 --> 01:30:26.109
so, and normally that's not my personality.
01:30:28.327 --> 01:30:38.443
I, while I will fight for myself, I'm not a, I'm not a like confrontational person, although people think I'm confrontational person.
01:30:38.443 --> 01:30:39.693
I'm really not.
01:30:41.253 --> 01:30:46.255
I would rather like not be that person.
01:30:46.556 --> 01:30:53.408
but I have the inability to smell something that stinks and not say something.
01:30:53.748 --> 01:30:56.009
I just don't have that ability.
01:30:56.170 --> 01:31:07.306
And so, you know, I came to this point where I've actually quit all of my jobs except for my first job.
01:31:07.306 --> 01:31:16.734
I was fired from that job and I was fired because somebody was bullying me.
01:31:18.259 --> 01:31:24.881
They knew that this person was bullying me when I complained there was retaliation.
01:31:25.890 --> 01:31:26.716
Mm.
01:31:27.560 --> 01:31:31.474
And my only saving grace back then was...
01:31:33.502 --> 01:31:38.143
Cause at that point I had like transferred to a different location or whatever.
01:31:38.563 --> 01:31:43.743
I had been working part time at this Calypso place that I was really enjoying.
01:31:43.743 --> 01:31:48.243
So I already had like my second job in play.
01:31:48.243 --> 01:31:48.863
Yeah.
01:31:48.863 --> 01:31:54.042
And so like, like I didn't, you know, I was annoyed, but I was just kind of like, whatever.
01:31:54.042 --> 01:31:55.323
I have my degree.
01:31:55.323 --> 01:32:00.042
Like you already paid for the bachelor's calm down, you know?
01:32:00.443 --> 01:32:01.863
And out.
01:32:02.301 --> 01:32:14.317
You know, but I remember like I thought about it's crazy because after they fired me, they asked me to come back.
01:32:16.310 --> 01:32:17.310
Amazing.
01:32:17.918 --> 01:32:23.359
because the person who fired me didn't like run it up the chain.
01:32:23.359 --> 01:32:30.738
And so up the chain, I found out they had already like put my name was already on the list to be promoted.
01:32:30.738 --> 01:32:34.742
So I started getting calls about why I left.
01:32:36.447 --> 01:32:38.807
because they had no idea where I left.
01:32:38.967 --> 01:32:45.951
Because on the books, it was like I quit, but they had actually fired me.
01:32:45.951 --> 01:32:58.612
And so it was like, and I remember being like, thank you so much for reaching out, but I don't want to work for a place that doesn't have accountability and oversight or words like that.
01:32:58.612 --> 01:33:10.661
I don't think I use those words, you know, but like, I was having a similar type of situation at this place, right?
01:33:10.661 --> 01:33:17.100
And it was after, I'm gonna speak it.
01:33:17.100 --> 01:33:22.167
And it was after they poached me from the first firm.
01:33:23.954 --> 01:33:33.390
They spent seven months trying to get me to even just submit my resume.
01:33:36.006 --> 01:33:48.368
And then they waited three months after I submitted my resume because I didn't want to leave my first job high and dry because I was in the middle of like a psychotic deal.
01:33:48.368 --> 01:33:55.463
And I wouldn't be able to tell somebody how to pick up where I was leaving off.
01:33:55.463 --> 01:33:57.506
There was just too many moving parts.
01:33:57.506 --> 01:34:05.954
And so I negotiated to start three months after I accepted their Okay.
01:34:06.716 --> 01:34:10.197
I didn't get a sign on bonus, but I didn't want that.
01:34:10.636 --> 01:34:12.078
I wanted time.
01:34:12.677 --> 01:34:16.279
And so they just offered time.
01:34:16.359 --> 01:34:18.640
I didn't have to negotiate that.
01:34:19.180 --> 01:34:27.884
And the time was I lost a year by delaying starting at that first firm for a year.
01:34:28.824 --> 01:34:37.873
But because of how much work I had done at my first firm in those 22 months that I worked there.
01:34:39.871 --> 01:34:48.331
I had done more work than people that would have been 40 years at the new place.
01:34:48.970 --> 01:34:53.211
So they made me a third year associate.
01:34:54.331 --> 01:34:55.430
Right?
01:34:55.511 --> 01:35:03.850
And then two years after that moment, I had people trying to convince me that I didn't know what I was doing.
01:35:03.871 --> 01:35:07.686
And it's kind of hard to skip a person a year.
01:35:09.266 --> 01:35:12.127
and then tell them they don't know what they're doing.
01:35:12.127 --> 01:35:13.560
It's just hard.
01:35:15.528 --> 01:35:18.851
So, I'm assuming you decided to leave.
01:35:18.851 --> 01:35:24.359
so I ended up leaving and I started Scrappy Girl Project.
01:35:26.542 --> 01:35:28.166
Scrappy Girl Project.
01:35:28.712 --> 01:35:29.595
I love it.
01:35:29.595 --> 01:35:39.899
the name is funny because like people think that like it's because I want it to be like a woman centric company, but the name is all about me.
01:35:40.180 --> 01:35:42.091
It's not about the people.
01:35:42.091 --> 01:35:53.655
It's really all about me because if you look, you know, but like it's about it's really about like a mindset.
01:35:53.655 --> 01:36:03.729
It's about a lifestyle of no matter what life throws me, it doesn't matter what scraps you give me, I'm gonna make a masterpiece out of it.
01:36:03.729 --> 01:36:06.871
That's what Scrappy Girl Project is all about.
01:36:07.091 --> 01:36:22.078
And if you look at my background, if you look at my journey line, just the parts I've shown you, you see, wait a minute, this stuff doesn't really fit until you meet Aubria.
01:36:22.078 --> 01:36:26.779
And you're like, This makes sense.
01:36:28.515 --> 01:36:29.476
Right?
01:36:30.171 --> 01:36:35.311
Now that I have met you and heard the whole story, it does kind of make sense.
01:36:35.311 --> 01:37:03.055
you know and and it's crazy because I can actually rewrite my story to make every single piece fit exactly perfect but I don't do that on purpose because I like I have to be honest about it for myself so I remember like no girl you didn't plan that don't lie to those people You didn't plan on being a professor.
01:37:03.055 --> 01:37:04.332
You didn't even think about it.
01:37:04.332 --> 01:37:05.786
It just happened.
01:37:06.850 --> 01:37:21.639
And, you know, I think that's why this is so interesting because like sometimes you just stumble into the right path and going from retail to professor to lawyer to now CEO and author.
01:37:21.639 --> 01:37:25.305
yeah, and I wrote children's books randomly too, somewhere in there.
01:37:26.220 --> 01:37:30.252
Yeah, just a little sprinkling of literature.
01:37:31.814 --> 01:37:34.836
Avria, that's the end of your journey line.
01:37:34.836 --> 01:37:37.161
What are you looking forward to next?
01:37:37.161 --> 01:37:45.475
So I'm actually entertaining law firms right now because I miss, I actually miss being a lawyer.
01:37:45.490 --> 01:37:52.030
And I didn't think I would miss it as much as I did initially.
01:37:52.030 --> 01:37:56.543
And so like, know, I know I've never had that before.
01:37:56.543 --> 01:38:05.369
This is the first time I've moved on from something where I'm like, you need to go back and like, you're not done.
01:38:06.270 --> 01:38:17.730
And And I think part of it is the rest of my journey really relies on me completing this leg.
01:38:18.032 --> 01:38:21.313
And so what does that mean for Scrappy Girl Project?
01:38:21.313 --> 01:38:26.085
Like, how do I keep doing that while also being an attorney?
01:38:26.085 --> 01:38:32.139
And I think for me, it's less about me as a crutch.
01:38:32.139 --> 01:38:33.259
I think...
01:38:33.592 --> 01:38:38.583
I don't have to be involved in every day all the time.
01:38:39.103 --> 01:38:43.456
And it's more about empowering people.
01:38:43.456 --> 01:39:03.448
And so I've been doing that by creating resources for people because my goal, even as a company owner, is not like most people's goals because I don't really want repeat customers, at least not for repeat.
01:39:03.448 --> 01:39:05.559
not for repeat problems.
01:39:06.619 --> 01:39:17.063
Like I'll help you solve a new problem, but we're not going to spend the next 10 years of my life trying to work out.
01:39:17.063 --> 01:39:20.344
Like we grow and build.
01:39:20.344 --> 01:39:31.367
And so you kind of have to be a certain kind of client to work with me, where like you have to be serious about wanting to.
01:39:32.359 --> 01:39:41.359
finish what you start and build on what you're doing so that you are in charge of what comes next.
01:39:41.800 --> 01:39:51.079
that there are a lot of, I wouldn't say I'm a coach and I know that I'm not because I don't want to be in your ear 24 seven.
01:39:51.100 --> 01:40:00.127
I want you to be in your own ear 24 seven because I've been in my own ear, although I've had coaches.
01:40:00.648 --> 01:40:06.713
And I do seek counsel and advice for pretty much everything.
01:40:07.234 --> 01:40:11.699
At the end of the day, my mindset is...
01:40:14.680 --> 01:40:15.104
to live with every decision that you make.
01:40:15.805 --> 01:40:20.971
give anybody percent over your next move.
01:40:20.971 --> 01:40:24.854
Like you have to, you have to decide this is what you want.
01:40:24.954 --> 01:40:28.618
And you know, and so that's kind of, I guess that's it.
01:40:28.618 --> 01:40:37.345
The goal is go finish being a while also helping anybody who wants to.
01:40:37.411 --> 01:40:49.238
keep pushing the envelope of where they are, know, develop that mindset, that mentality, and get it done.
01:40:50.408 --> 01:40:52.150
get it done.
01:40:52.150 --> 01:40:56.225
Well, Aubria, thank you so much for joining us today.
01:40:56.225 --> 01:41:05.069
Y'all can check out all of her links and information and her journey line in the description, and we'll see you next time.
01:41:05.069 --> 01:41:06.104
Bye, everyone.
01:41:06.104 --> 01:41:07.190
Thank you.