Speaker 0: Hello, and welcome to the Hearts Unleashed podcast where we are turning dreamers into doers. You guys, I am very excited to introduce to Ben Albert. He is an entrepreneur, podcaster, a marketer, a speaker, and a community builder. And we have lots of those around here, and I think this is just a great opportunity to meet him a little bit deeper. He is the founder of Real Business Connections, Valpert Marketing, and Grow Getters Only.
After being furloughed in 2020 and feeling lost about what came next, Ben began having conversations with people he admired. Those conversations changed his life and eventually became Real Business Connections, which has reached more than 1,000,000 listens and views. Today, Ben helps growth minded people build meaningful relationships, create opportunities, and grow personally and professionally. His mission is to move the needle on 1,000,000 lives, one conversation at a time. Ben, thank you so much for being here with us today.
Speaker 1: Thanks for having me. Let's have some fun today.
Speaker 0: Yes. I love that. And, man, when I first saw a biz a marketer, podcaster, doing all the things, writing all the things, I relate, and I think a lot of our listeners relate. People who are dreaming bigger, stretching farther, and maybe running up against some some roadblocks or some bumps in the road. And you mentioned in your introduction how you were furloughed in 2020.
What were you doing before this lifestyle?
Speaker 1: You know, there's there's kinda two ends of the lifestyle. There's business Ben and then there's music Ben. It's a whole another thing where, like, I'm camping and music festivals. And, prior to the pandemic, I was pretending like I had made it in, like, the business world. I'm from Rochester.
And the building I worked out of is in photos of the city. Beautiful tower. I'm up near the top of it, wearing, like, a suit and tie to work. But, you know, music band who's, like, a party animal and love music, unfortunately, you know, the industry can get you in trouble sometimes. So I was going out, like, five nights a week, like, Wednesday through Sunday, and watch football on Sunday, show up Monday, and barely be able to make it through Monday morning meetings.
And it got to a real dark place where I was prescribing myself, like, small amounts of Xanax just to get through the day. Yeah. So I had the suit and tie, and I was working up high and things were looking good on the outside, but it was a sinking ship. It was falling apart. My health was terrible.
And when the pandemic hit, I had just started in a new role. So I was a sales executive for this agency and we did video production all across The United States. So there's a lot of travel, a lot of in person, and all of that got shut down. No travel, no in person, no video, no fulfillment, people charging back, no sales. So no hate on the company.
They let me go, and then I was just left the party animal who now doesn't have a job and is currently broke, unemployed, and nonessential because I was doing, like, local music promotion and booking bands and websites and stuff for fun. I wasn't making a lot of money doing it, but I got to get into places for free. But now music and is broke, nonessential, unemployed, and lost just staring at the wall thinking the pandemic's gonna end quicker then. It just it keeps going on and on and on. We all share this experience.
It stung.
Speaker 0: Yeah.
Speaker 1: So it just it really forced me to rebirth myself. And sometimes when I tell this story, there's like music Ben and then chapter two's business Ben who's an entrepreneur. But the beauty, it's the same Ben. I just had to step into something different. I had a music podcast and a music promotion company.
I started a business podcast. I called it Rochester again, Rochester, New York business connections. Not because I was well connected, it's because I needed some. And on LinkedIn, a friend request was a connection request. So I was like, okay.
Let's reach out to business owners in Rochester, New York and platform them, and maybe somehow I'll figure it out along the way. Mhmm. And now I feel like an old man back in the day because apparently, I figured it out because now this is my life and it's my story, and I'm sticking to it. That's really fantastic and inspiring. And before I
Speaker 0: forget, maybe I'm jumping ahead, but it started as Rochester Business Connections. Has it expanded nationally and globally, or do you still focus pretty geographically tight?
Speaker 1: It's now global. I have a Rochester interview this week, but I used to I started so this is just what I did. I'm not telling I'm not being prescriptive. I'm just describing one way of doing things. Yeah.
I dove in, like, I needed connections. So I did a 22 episode launch in November 2020, an episode a day, all of November, then I went to five. He was doing four a week, then three a week because I was making connections real in just all Rochester, New York. And then once I was able to build a foundation, that's when I decided to rebrand from Rochester to real, bring on because I have been listening to podcast since I was, like, super young, I feel like. And I wanted to bring on more than just Rochester, but I went really heavy and aggressive on my own community first.
I was a minnow in an ocean. Let's find the smallest pod possible. Yeah. Once I made my name here, that's when I had the chutzpah to go ahead and try something bigger than that. And it's just a micro lesson that, like, put your chips on your community first if you don't know where to start.
Speaker 0: Most definitely. I think I love that idea. I've heard of that concept in Saint Louis. I have a friend who's doing that in Saint Louis, and I I just think it's really relevant. And, of course, there's that growth potential.
And, you know, you're kind of speaking to the concept in general no matter what our dream is, this is so applicable, is, like, start small, local, but localized. It doesn't have to be geographically local, but, like, a local concept. Mhmm. And let it let it grow. How many years have you had this podcast now?
Speaker 1: It was November 2020. So, wow, like Six. Six years.
Speaker 0: Yeah. You're almost at your anniversary. Congratulations. And so, you know, most people think, oh, I'm gonna get the whole dream accomplished in six months. And then when they don't, when it's not fully fulfilled, you know, Rome wasn't built in a day, but then a lot of people quit too soon.
Do you see that a lot in your work of people who drop off faster than they came on?
Speaker 1: I mean, life is but a dichotomy because in some scenarios, you need to quit. If you leave a bad relationship, a bad company, like, a bad position, you're not a good fit, great company, not right for you, you need to leave. But if you're passionate about something and when you feel in your body that, like, this is something that's important to you, longevity is always the key. Like, you need a long time horizon.
Speaker 0: I appreciate that.
Speaker 1: There are things that you need to quit. But usually, like, if you feel in your body that this is important to me, I'm gonna continue doing it. I still go to concerts. I just I'm not a party animal going to four or five a week. It's important to me, so I found a way to have a good relationship with it.
So it's Nuance, but all the most successful people, other than the ones that got lucky and most of them openly will tell you they got lucky, it was because they were on a long trajectory. Yeah.
Speaker 0: We actually here on the podcast, we have a couple episodes about healthy quitting. And so learning that difference, feeling it in your body, knowing what's when it's time to let the end be here or when it's time to persist and pursue. And so I I really appreciate that. And something else I really appreciate is what you had shared with us about the look of success. But, you know, of the shaky foundation or standing on quicksand is just the the idea I'm gonna say, like, doing it for the gram.
Like, the pictures look good and and the the status looks good, but the satisfaction isn't there, the fulfillment isn't there, and the functionality. You know? Would you say because I'm a little bit new to your content. Do you speak about is that would you have called that addiction at the time when you were partying pretty hard? Or it was it more just kind of like, I was I was functioning, but
Speaker 1: I don't know if I would call it addiction at the time. I Yeah. Truly, like, addiction is when your behaviors get in the way of your goals is how it would simplify it. Yeah. I know I want to do this, but my behavior is taking me elsewhere.
Yeah. So absolutely it was an addiction. It was a nervous tic. I'm undiagnosed, but, like, everyone who knows me is like, Ben, you're likely autistic and Yeah. I have anxiety.
So, like, drinking alcohol is great for numbing Of course. Some of the things that might be coming up. Yeah. So, yeah, of course, it's an addiction. It's it's a numbing behavior, which Yeah.
It doesn't have to be alcohol. Like, we all have these, and I think it's okay. It's it's good to acknowledge that, though.
Speaker 0: Yeah. Now are have you leveled out in the way of, like, I still partake, or is it sobriety? What direction did you take your life after you started making the change?
Speaker 1: I still have a little fun.
Speaker 0: That's fair.
Speaker 1: I take breaks.
Speaker 0: That's good.
Speaker 1: Yeah. Part of me feels like I'm coping. But
Speaker 0: Yeah. No. I understand. And Yeah. And finding the right ways to do that and the the ways that feel good and also creativity.
Like, I'm I'm six and a half years sober somewhere in that range.
Speaker 1: Congrats.
Speaker 0: And I had thank you. And I had a really loving relationship with marijuana. Like, I'm still an advocate for that. Alcohol, for me, not so much. It's drink for drunk.
It's zero to 10. So that you know, that I'm okay without that. And with marijuana, even though I choose not to partake, I still think that it helped me with anxiety tremendously. I think it helped with balance. I think it helped with creativity.
So there's a lot of reasons that I like it and love it. And for me, I just know it's a slippery slope. So I I I say thank you, no thank you. But I I love that. And I also love that you mentioned I still have music in my life in a way that suits my level of success and my chosen direction and all of that sort of stuff.
So I think these are the types of things that people are considering and how to find balance, and it doesn't have to be all or nothing. There can be moderation. There can be integration of the things that bring us joy and help us let loose and also and then find focus and hone in. And so at this season of life, what are you really focused on? What what are you creating this season of life?
Speaker 1: Oh, that's such a big question. I'm behind the scenes creating a lot. I just started a LinkedIn series where I I've become obsessed with contradictions.
Speaker 0: Mhmm. Say more.
Speaker 1: I used to think all these contradictions were, like, something that I had to mask and for example, very shy, more introverted, hyperly well connected person. I'm a hippie in business. Yeah. I'm super growth driven, but I'm also, like, totally a minimalist. Like, I'm wearing a black t shirt right now.
Like, I don't have to be outward. I'm not flashy. When I make money, I don't really talk about it. I'd like to think I feel like it's not humble to say it, but I'd like to think I'm pretty wise. But I'm also like a total goofball.
I'm not like a Yoda sage. Yeah. And I used to think, okay. If I'm gonna be in business, I have to show up this way. Or if I wanna be connected, I need to learn how to talk to anyone and be more extroverted.
Or if I wanna be a marketer, I need to be flashy and braggadocious. And it was actually the contradictions, the insecurities that were making me a one of one was making me who I am. Mhmm. Like, being a podcaster who's done some things and used to identify more as a hippie, like, I listen different than some other podcasters. I see the world in my own unique way, and I think that's a beautiful thing.
So I become obsessed with, like, looking at these contradictions. And what the LinkedIn series is looking at is celebrities because they're people we know. Like, Martha Stewart's a great example. Yes. She's like the trad wife, homemaker, you know, just perfect homemaker vibe.
But then it was it was a someone's like, it was a white collar crime. It was still a crime. She did white collar crime. She went to prison. So Mhmm.
She can cook you a baked pie. She can also tell you what prison food tastes like.
Speaker 0: Yeah.
Speaker 1: And now she's besties with Snoop Dogg. Yeah. And they, like, smoke weed together and swear. So Martha Stewart being this on the surface, this trad wife look, but being kind of this, like, badass white collar criminal that's hanging out with Snoop Dogg smoking weed, that's what makes her such a brilliant personality. Dolly Parton, I just I have never said this one.
I'm gonna add add this to the series. She was like so country and beautiful and sweet and outgoing, but a brilliant business mind. One of the most brilliant business minds in the world. And it's those contradictions that make us kick butt. Yeah.
But if we don't step into the fact that we can live on a continuum and be contradictory, we end up being vanilla, boring, or acting like someone we're not.
Speaker 0: Yeah.
Speaker 1: And that's one thing that I've been really passionate and self observant of because I used to feel like some of the things I wish were different, I became like a victim or wish I wasn't wish I was more extroverted. It's a easy one.
Speaker 0: Yeah. And
Speaker 1: I was like, dang. Like, I'm kinda happy that I'm not. This is what makes me who I am. Yeah.
Speaker 0: I mean, you're hitting the nail on the head for us because one of the biggest messages here at Hearts Unleashed is, like, stop trying to become someone and something else. The answer to life period is to become the most yourself you can manage to be. Right? And how do we integrate the many versions of us into that true expression? So could not agree more.
Martha cracks me up because not only everything you said, in her eighties, she's also becoming some sex icon. Like, she she's just kissing at the camera, blowing us kisses, and all this. And then you Dolly, I couldn't agree more of, like, she was laughing all the way to the bank, dude. Like, you know, everyone's like, she's this trash you know, all the drag and the, you know, the dumb blonde and, you know, the none of that. She was a tycoon.
She and just absolutely brilliant. Such an inspiration to me. And I think most of us, myself included, because this happened a few years back, I set my sights on becoming, like, almost like Tony Robbins level motivational speaker. And I attend a lot of networking events that I call the Shark Tank, like, in terms of it's just a big circle jerk of everybody shaking hands and throwing business cards and their thirty second pitches at each other, and I'm, like, just bursting at the seams. And I did that for the first few years of my business because I thought that was what was required of me.
But then come, you know, a few seasons of life later, few seasons of business later, it's like, I'm striving for something I don't even want. And that was really, really awakening. It's like, I'm I don't wanna be Louis Vuitton rich. I wanna be REI rich. Like, I'm a camper too.
I I don't know if you know this about me, but I have a little van house that I drive around. And so I head west for winter because I'm always trying to escape the snow, but unless I'm skiing on it. But for me, it was that awakening of, like, what is my definition of success? So we talk a lot about that here, and I wanna ask you that question. At this season, what is your definition of success?
Speaker 1: People keep asking me this, and I struggle to answer it. Mhmm. It's I've been, like, goofing. Last time someone asked I I literally been goofing when people ask me this question because, like, me in five years, exact same person but in better shape.
Speaker 0: Okay. Yep.
Speaker 1: And and the reason I say that is, like, I feel like what I'm doing now is in direct alignment with who I am and where I wanna be. Yeah. And when I define success, like, if I were to break it down into a nerdy algorithm Yeah. There's impact, there's joy, there's fulfillment, and there is time. And ideally, I'm able to be in the middle of all those quadrants.
So how can I make the greatest impact in the least amount of time while feeling a lot of joy, but being fulfilled as well? Because there's a lot of things in this world that will make you a lot of impact. Let's say impact could be a lot of things, but let's just use dollars as an example. Money. Impact.
You can make a lot of money doing something that doesn't bring you joy and isn't fulfilling.
Speaker 0: Truly.
Speaker 1: You can also make a lot of money if you put a ton of time into something, which is sometimes required. But ideally, I'm gonna make better money in less time while feeling fulfilled and joyful doing it. And you're never gonna get a 10 out of 10 on all of those. I hate when people give 10 out of tens on anything in this because we're constantly evolving. Like Mhmm.
Not every single moment's gonna be a 10 out of 10 joyful, but it will be fulfilling. Some things will take more time than others. But for me, it's how do I optimize those four categories. It's not a specific number. It's not a specific way.
Specific number of people even though I think I have in the bio impact a million careers one conversation at a time. Right. A big vision is great for casting that vision. But to me, it's every single day, am I in alignment with who I am and who I am becoming? Is it bringing me joy?
Is it bringing me fulfillment? Am I doing it as time efficient as possible? And I'm making an impact. And then all you do is you get better at all those categories and you continue to evolve and hit new stages, so on and so forth. So but the reality is I don't know if I would do anything differently.
I'm just trying to do what I'm doing now a little bit better.
Speaker 0: Yes. You have it in your intro, and and we have a little mini course here of moving the needle. And it's exactly what you're speaking about. Move it just a little bit. We're not going from zero to ten.
We're going from four to five and then five to six. You know? I and I really appreciate that because incremental growth is sustainable growth. And, yes, there are there is nuance to that, but three to 10 isn't necessarily sustainable. And so I think, I just appreciate that insight, and I appreciate our listeners getting a chance to hear from people that are successful at things they'd like to be doing.
Say, I did that a little bit at a time, and I'm doing that a little bit at a time. And so my next question for you is, what have you had to give up to get here? What have you had to let go of to get to this point?
Speaker 1: Dang. I don't know if I like answering this question. When I first started in the business, I wasn't in the best mental or emotional place. Like, the click bait is, like, started a business and replaces a sales executive income in a year. Yeah.
That's like the click bait. Mhmm. What people didn't see is it took my entire life of struggle and failure and mistakes and skill building to even get to a point where I was lucky enough to be able to pull that feet off during the pandemic. Yeah. But part of it was literally, like, I I never actually wrote down how much I was working.
Yeah. But I would wake up and do a work related task. Now I'm very passionate about what I do. I don't like the word work. But in reality, it was a work related task.
Yeah. I would wake up, I would start, and then at the end, like, my girlfriend would watch Netflix. I would be watching next to her, but working the whole time.
Speaker 0: Yeah.
Speaker 1: And I literally was on my laptop, like, the entire waking hours.
Speaker 0: Yes. And
Speaker 1: then I understand the time that I'm not on my laptop. I'm on my phone. Mhmm. And it was early on in business, but we like to go on a music cruise off in jam cruise. And I didn't go because I'm like, if I'm off my laptop, everything's gonna burn to the ground.
And this is just an example of many of the things that, like, my relationships weren't going great. I wasn't getting outside as much. It's been almost three years that I hired a personal trainer. But at the early part of the pandemic, I was just letting my body go, my health go. I wasn't being mindful of my decision making.
I would like, at the start of it, just binge drink and play Xbox for two days straight. And then I moved into obsession with that, to obsession in the business. So I was very unbalanced and I feel like I needed it. Again, I went from three to 10, and it was okay for a time, but it wasn't long term sustainable.
Speaker 0: Yeah. I appreciate the transparency with that. And if someone is resonating with what you just shared, what sort of advice or guidance would you offer them to sort of break those disempowering patterns and and make a positive shift?
Speaker 1: It took me a while to figure this out, and I call it the 2% rule. And a lot of people teach you habits, And I was optimized as heck. That's one thing that's really important for people to understand. I was doing a basically, a version of A Miracle Morning by Hal Elrod. And the simple version, for anyone listening, I recommend you do this.
I'm not saying habits are bad. Silence, affirmations, visualization, exercise, reading, scribing. So silence every morning, meditation, affirmations, visualizing my future, feeling the emotion of it, exercise, reading, and scribing or journaling and writing. I had been optimized as heck for years on end. The problem wasn't my morning rituals or my morning habits.
The problem was the decisions I would make after my morning. The spending two days drinking or spending an afternoon, like, scrolling my phone or looking at porn or not spending time with family, like, all the things. It wasn't the things that I was doing in the morning that was the problem. Mhmm. What was not allowing the cream to rise to the surface was the fact that I was suppressing all the good stuff with bad stuff.
Mhmm. And I got nerdy one day, and I figured out, well, what's 1% of the day? Mhmm. And 1% of the day is literally fourteen and a half minutes. So to simplify the algorithm, you just round it up to 15.
So one percent of your day is fifteen minutes. So as I went through the silence information, I used to teach this stuff. If you're not doing positive daily tiny habits, integrate one of those. But you're like, I'm busy. Like, I don't have time to integrate this new stuff.
I'm already, like, overloaded. Okay. So what we need to do is figure out what we can subtract 1% of. So am I scrolling my phone fifteen minutes too long? Am I watching Netflix fifteen minutes too long?
Am I on YouTube a little bit too long? Am I gossiping a little bit too long? What if I just did that fifteen minutes less a day? And that'll be a 1% change. And guess what happens?
Now that you have the fifteen minutes, you can integrate a good habit to replace the bad one and addition through subtraction by not doing something for 1% and by doing another thing by 1%. You just made a 2% difference in your day, and it only took you fifteen minutes to do it. And I love that. For anyone who hasn't started, do that. For anyone who's over optimized, your goal is to subtract.
Because I think that subtraction people think that self care is a massage. I get massages. I love it. But self care can also be just getting rid of the bad stuff.
Speaker 0: Yeah. I couldn't agree more. And and that rest is an active self care thing for a high achiever. You know? So it it there's so many, but that was brilliant.
So thank you because that is so tangible. That is so applicable right now today. One, people have spent you know, I feel like this is one of those one percent activities, listening to a positive impact podcast. Hell, yeah. And as soon as this episode ends, spend the next fifteen minutes on yourself doing something that's gonna, you know, improve your day or your life.
So I I really appreciate that. I can And one
Speaker 1: more thing to make it even more applicable. Please. Yes. You take a pen and paper. You draw a line down the paper, or you can do it on a desktop, but the visual, just draw a line.
Two categories, better, bitter.
Speaker 0: Yeah.
Speaker 1: Write down all the stuff that makes you better, then get wild. Write down all the things that make you bitter and pissed off. Yeah. Yeah. And don't try to be a hero overnight.
Just circle one better action and one bitter action, and now you have exactly what to do next.
Speaker 0: That's fantastic. I love it. Thank you. I I can't wait to hear which which of our listeners say, oh, that was great idea. That started it.
You know? That's awesome. And before we begin to wrap up there, I have one more question for you, Anne. I wanna make sure, where can people connect with you?
Speaker 1: So I always like to make sure because this is your show, your audience. It's amazing. I'm a newbie here. So I'm gonna double check, but I'm pretty sure I already clicked subscribe. Yeah.
Somewhere on the screen, there might be a thumb up or a five star or a comment or a view. Y'all do that now because it tells the algorithm that this is good stuff. It helps us out. So if y'all could do that right now, that's great. You can find my show wherever you found this or just googling real business connections.
Real business connections, pretty easy to spell or just Google it. And if we didn't really talk about this much, but what I'm building behind the scenes, it really is a community of entrepreneurs. Some people aren't entrepreneurs, but they're intrepreneurs. They're in marketing or sales. And our goal is not done for you or done with you.
It's literally done together services. We all grow together. We all mastermind and learn together. So if you're an entrepreneur or aspire to be one, that's where I'd recommend they go to weallgrowtogether.com. It's a community called Grow Getters Only, but that's a three step process.
Step one is show some love here. If you want more podcasts after you subscribe here, then subscribe to Real Business Connections. And then if you want more hands on support, actual interaction with me and my guests, then you would go to We Other. That's a lot of words. Weallgrowtogether.com.
That was a lot, but I hope that made sense.
Speaker 0: No. That was perfect. And I it reminded me, I wanted to ask about about what Grow Getters Only was, so that that was brilliant. Thank you for adding that. And then, you have Balbert Marketing too.
What is that?
Speaker 1: Yeah. So Balbert Marketing technically is the business and then Grow Getters Only and Real Business Connections or sub businesses under Baubert Marketing. But it literally, at the core was, it's August 2020. I don't wanna get sued because I'm technically a competitor to my prior employer. So I register an LLC, and my name's Ben Albert.
So I call it Balbert. Within one week, one of my friends, like, no one even calls you Balbert. And I'm like, that's not the point. That's not the point. So so I've actually long term, I'm probably gonna dissolve the name because Real Business Connections to me is a bigger, more beautiful brand that I think one day could be sold and have greater impact.
Balbert's way too ego. It's just my name. But Balbert Marketing is doing local marketing. Real Business Connections is doing a podcast and podcast production, and then Grow Getters Only is doing the community mastermind building. So they're three legs to the same creature because all of it is bridging the gap of impact, getting the knowledge to where it needs to be.
Speaker 0: I love that. I appreciate that. And you guys, Grow Getters only. And always know we have all these links and notes and connections in the show notes at heartsunleashed.com. So you can grab that on the, search by title page or the podcast page, follow along.
But, thank you for encouraging people like and subscribe and do all those things and stay connected. But I think you're doing a fantastic job, and, it's just very exciting to be a part of and to learn a little bit more about. So thank you.
Speaker 1: Same to you, Abigail. I think
Speaker 0: you're doing amazing. Thank you. I appreciate that. And our last question that we ask most of our guests is, what does it look like for Ben's heart to be unleashed?
Speaker 1: Wow. I didn't prep this one. That's a beautiful big question. That's amazing. That's sweet.
My heart to be unleashed. So this doesn't answer the question, but it gets close to it. And this is gonna be contrarian. I'd rather completely fail being exactly who I am than succeed trying to be someone I'm not. I would rather never make the money goals that I have, never have the impact that I have.
God forbid this happened, but never have any of the blanks, but do it as Ben Mhmm. Than put on a mask the rest of my life and do it as someone I'm not. So I think my heart being unleashed is literally just stepping in to who I am, and I'm not an expert. I find a new piece and part of myself every single day. So, that's how I believe I'd answer that question.
Speaker 0: Fantastic. I didn't say it explicitly. There was a lot of your answers that the undercurrent is self mastery. Like, just mastery of self, mastery of being human, of navigating this wild, wild world. And so I think there's just so many gems for our listeners to get to enjoy and carry into their day and implement into their life.
So I just wanna say thank you. That was a great answer, for so many reasons. I appreciate you.
Speaker 1: Thanks so much.
Speaker 0: And hearts, thank you so much for listening. I hope you did get exactly what you needed. I and maybe more and and implement this into your life, continue the integration, and, of course, continue unleashing your big beautiful heart. Thank you for tuning in to the Hearts Unleashed podcast where we are turning dreamers into doers. We love you.
Thanks for tuning in to the Hearts Unleashed podcast. We hope you found all the inspiration that you needed and that you use it to take inspired action on your dreams. If you love the show, share it with with a friend. We love spreading the love. For more information, to listen to more episodes, and shop hearts unleashed, visit heartsunleashed.com.
See you next time hearts.
After being furloughed in 2020 and feeling lost about what came next, Ben began having conversations with people he admired. Those conversations changed his life and eventually became Real Business Connections, which has reached more than 1,000,000 listens and views. Today, Ben helps growth minded people build meaningful relationships, create opportunities, and grow personally and professionally. His mission is to move the needle on 1,000,000 lives, one conversation at a time. Ben, thank you so much for being here with us today.
Speaker 1: Thanks for having me. Let's have some fun today.
Speaker 0: Yes. I love that. And, man, when I first saw a biz a marketer, podcaster, doing all the things, writing all the things, I relate, and I think a lot of our listeners relate. People who are dreaming bigger, stretching farther, and maybe running up against some some roadblocks or some bumps in the road. And you mentioned in your introduction how you were furloughed in 2020.
What were you doing before this lifestyle?
Speaker 1: You know, there's there's kinda two ends of the lifestyle. There's business Ben and then there's music Ben. It's a whole another thing where, like, I'm camping and music festivals. And, prior to the pandemic, I was pretending like I had made it in, like, the business world. I'm from Rochester.
And the building I worked out of is in photos of the city. Beautiful tower. I'm up near the top of it, wearing, like, a suit and tie to work. But, you know, music band who's, like, a party animal and love music, unfortunately, you know, the industry can get you in trouble sometimes. So I was going out, like, five nights a week, like, Wednesday through Sunday, and watch football on Sunday, show up Monday, and barely be able to make it through Monday morning meetings.
And it got to a real dark place where I was prescribing myself, like, small amounts of Xanax just to get through the day. Yeah. So I had the suit and tie, and I was working up high and things were looking good on the outside, but it was a sinking ship. It was falling apart. My health was terrible.
And when the pandemic hit, I had just started in a new role. So I was a sales executive for this agency and we did video production all across The United States. So there's a lot of travel, a lot of in person, and all of that got shut down. No travel, no in person, no video, no fulfillment, people charging back, no sales. So no hate on the company.
They let me go, and then I was just left the party animal who now doesn't have a job and is currently broke, unemployed, and nonessential because I was doing, like, local music promotion and booking bands and websites and stuff for fun. I wasn't making a lot of money doing it, but I got to get into places for free. But now music and is broke, nonessential, unemployed, and lost just staring at the wall thinking the pandemic's gonna end quicker then. It just it keeps going on and on and on. We all share this experience.
It stung.
Speaker 0: Yeah.
Speaker 1: So it just it really forced me to rebirth myself. And sometimes when I tell this story, there's like music Ben and then chapter two's business Ben who's an entrepreneur. But the beauty, it's the same Ben. I just had to step into something different. I had a music podcast and a music promotion company.
I started a business podcast. I called it Rochester again, Rochester, New York business connections. Not because I was well connected, it's because I needed some. And on LinkedIn, a friend request was a connection request. So I was like, okay.
Let's reach out to business owners in Rochester, New York and platform them, and maybe somehow I'll figure it out along the way. Mhmm. And now I feel like an old man back in the day because apparently, I figured it out because now this is my life and it's my story, and I'm sticking to it. That's really fantastic and inspiring. And before I
Speaker 0: forget, maybe I'm jumping ahead, but it started as Rochester Business Connections. Has it expanded nationally and globally, or do you still focus pretty geographically tight?
Speaker 1: It's now global. I have a Rochester interview this week, but I used to I started so this is just what I did. I'm not telling I'm not being prescriptive. I'm just describing one way of doing things. Yeah.
I dove in, like, I needed connections. So I did a 22 episode launch in November 2020, an episode a day, all of November, then I went to five. He was doing four a week, then three a week because I was making connections real in just all Rochester, New York. And then once I was able to build a foundation, that's when I decided to rebrand from Rochester to real, bring on because I have been listening to podcast since I was, like, super young, I feel like. And I wanted to bring on more than just Rochester, but I went really heavy and aggressive on my own community first.
I was a minnow in an ocean. Let's find the smallest pod possible. Yeah. Once I made my name here, that's when I had the chutzpah to go ahead and try something bigger than that. And it's just a micro lesson that, like, put your chips on your community first if you don't know where to start.
Speaker 0: Most definitely. I think I love that idea. I've heard of that concept in Saint Louis. I have a friend who's doing that in Saint Louis, and I I just think it's really relevant. And, of course, there's that growth potential.
And, you know, you're kind of speaking to the concept in general no matter what our dream is, this is so applicable, is, like, start small, local, but localized. It doesn't have to be geographically local, but, like, a local concept. Mhmm. And let it let it grow. How many years have you had this podcast now?
Speaker 1: It was November 2020. So, wow, like Six. Six years.
Speaker 0: Yeah. You're almost at your anniversary. Congratulations. And so, you know, most people think, oh, I'm gonna get the whole dream accomplished in six months. And then when they don't, when it's not fully fulfilled, you know, Rome wasn't built in a day, but then a lot of people quit too soon.
Do you see that a lot in your work of people who drop off faster than they came on?
Speaker 1: I mean, life is but a dichotomy because in some scenarios, you need to quit. If you leave a bad relationship, a bad company, like, a bad position, you're not a good fit, great company, not right for you, you need to leave. But if you're passionate about something and when you feel in your body that, like, this is something that's important to you, longevity is always the key. Like, you need a long time horizon.
Speaker 0: I appreciate that.
Speaker 1: There are things that you need to quit. But usually, like, if you feel in your body that this is important to me, I'm gonna continue doing it. I still go to concerts. I just I'm not a party animal going to four or five a week. It's important to me, so I found a way to have a good relationship with it.
So it's Nuance, but all the most successful people, other than the ones that got lucky and most of them openly will tell you they got lucky, it was because they were on a long trajectory. Yeah.
Speaker 0: We actually here on the podcast, we have a couple episodes about healthy quitting. And so learning that difference, feeling it in your body, knowing what's when it's time to let the end be here or when it's time to persist and pursue. And so I I really appreciate that. And something else I really appreciate is what you had shared with us about the look of success. But, you know, of the shaky foundation or standing on quicksand is just the the idea I'm gonna say, like, doing it for the gram.
Like, the pictures look good and and the the status looks good, but the satisfaction isn't there, the fulfillment isn't there, and the functionality. You know? Would you say because I'm a little bit new to your content. Do you speak about is that would you have called that addiction at the time when you were partying pretty hard? Or it was it more just kind of like, I was I was functioning, but
Speaker 1: I don't know if I would call it addiction at the time. I Yeah. Truly, like, addiction is when your behaviors get in the way of your goals is how it would simplify it. Yeah. I know I want to do this, but my behavior is taking me elsewhere.
Yeah. So absolutely it was an addiction. It was a nervous tic. I'm undiagnosed, but, like, everyone who knows me is like, Ben, you're likely autistic and Yeah. I have anxiety.
So, like, drinking alcohol is great for numbing Of course. Some of the things that might be coming up. Yeah. So, yeah, of course, it's an addiction. It's it's a numbing behavior, which Yeah.
It doesn't have to be alcohol. Like, we all have these, and I think it's okay. It's it's good to acknowledge that, though.
Speaker 0: Yeah. Now are have you leveled out in the way of, like, I still partake, or is it sobriety? What direction did you take your life after you started making the change?
Speaker 1: I still have a little fun.
Speaker 0: That's fair.
Speaker 1: I take breaks.
Speaker 0: That's good.
Speaker 1: Yeah. Part of me feels like I'm coping. But
Speaker 0: Yeah. No. I understand. And Yeah. And finding the right ways to do that and the the ways that feel good and also creativity.
Like, I'm I'm six and a half years sober somewhere in that range.
Speaker 1: Congrats.
Speaker 0: And I had thank you. And I had a really loving relationship with marijuana. Like, I'm still an advocate for that. Alcohol, for me, not so much. It's drink for drunk.
It's zero to 10. So that you know, that I'm okay without that. And with marijuana, even though I choose not to partake, I still think that it helped me with anxiety tremendously. I think it helped with balance. I think it helped with creativity.
So there's a lot of reasons that I like it and love it. And for me, I just know it's a slippery slope. So I I I say thank you, no thank you. But I I love that. And I also love that you mentioned I still have music in my life in a way that suits my level of success and my chosen direction and all of that sort of stuff.
So I think these are the types of things that people are considering and how to find balance, and it doesn't have to be all or nothing. There can be moderation. There can be integration of the things that bring us joy and help us let loose and also and then find focus and hone in. And so at this season of life, what are you really focused on? What what are you creating this season of life?
Speaker 1: Oh, that's such a big question. I'm behind the scenes creating a lot. I just started a LinkedIn series where I I've become obsessed with contradictions.
Speaker 0: Mhmm. Say more.
Speaker 1: I used to think all these contradictions were, like, something that I had to mask and for example, very shy, more introverted, hyperly well connected person. I'm a hippie in business. Yeah. I'm super growth driven, but I'm also, like, totally a minimalist. Like, I'm wearing a black t shirt right now.
Like, I don't have to be outward. I'm not flashy. When I make money, I don't really talk about it. I'd like to think I feel like it's not humble to say it, but I'd like to think I'm pretty wise. But I'm also like a total goofball.
I'm not like a Yoda sage. Yeah. And I used to think, okay. If I'm gonna be in business, I have to show up this way. Or if I wanna be connected, I need to learn how to talk to anyone and be more extroverted.
Or if I wanna be a marketer, I need to be flashy and braggadocious. And it was actually the contradictions, the insecurities that were making me a one of one was making me who I am. Mhmm. Like, being a podcaster who's done some things and used to identify more as a hippie, like, I listen different than some other podcasters. I see the world in my own unique way, and I think that's a beautiful thing.
So I become obsessed with, like, looking at these contradictions. And what the LinkedIn series is looking at is celebrities because they're people we know. Like, Martha Stewart's a great example. Yes. She's like the trad wife, homemaker, you know, just perfect homemaker vibe.
But then it was it was a someone's like, it was a white collar crime. It was still a crime. She did white collar crime. She went to prison. So Mhmm.
She can cook you a baked pie. She can also tell you what prison food tastes like.
Speaker 0: Yeah.
Speaker 1: And now she's besties with Snoop Dogg. Yeah. And they, like, smoke weed together and swear. So Martha Stewart being this on the surface, this trad wife look, but being kind of this, like, badass white collar criminal that's hanging out with Snoop Dogg smoking weed, that's what makes her such a brilliant personality. Dolly Parton, I just I have never said this one.
I'm gonna add add this to the series. She was like so country and beautiful and sweet and outgoing, but a brilliant business mind. One of the most brilliant business minds in the world. And it's those contradictions that make us kick butt. Yeah.
But if we don't step into the fact that we can live on a continuum and be contradictory, we end up being vanilla, boring, or acting like someone we're not.
Speaker 0: Yeah.
Speaker 1: And that's one thing that I've been really passionate and self observant of because I used to feel like some of the things I wish were different, I became like a victim or wish I wasn't wish I was more extroverted. It's a easy one.
Speaker 0: Yeah. And
Speaker 1: I was like, dang. Like, I'm kinda happy that I'm not. This is what makes me who I am. Yeah.
Speaker 0: I mean, you're hitting the nail on the head for us because one of the biggest messages here at Hearts Unleashed is, like, stop trying to become someone and something else. The answer to life period is to become the most yourself you can manage to be. Right? And how do we integrate the many versions of us into that true expression? So could not agree more.
Martha cracks me up because not only everything you said, in her eighties, she's also becoming some sex icon. Like, she she's just kissing at the camera, blowing us kisses, and all this. And then you Dolly, I couldn't agree more of, like, she was laughing all the way to the bank, dude. Like, you know, everyone's like, she's this trash you know, all the drag and the, you know, the dumb blonde and, you know, the none of that. She was a tycoon.
She and just absolutely brilliant. Such an inspiration to me. And I think most of us, myself included, because this happened a few years back, I set my sights on becoming, like, almost like Tony Robbins level motivational speaker. And I attend a lot of networking events that I call the Shark Tank, like, in terms of it's just a big circle jerk of everybody shaking hands and throwing business cards and their thirty second pitches at each other, and I'm, like, just bursting at the seams. And I did that for the first few years of my business because I thought that was what was required of me.
But then come, you know, a few seasons of life later, few seasons of business later, it's like, I'm striving for something I don't even want. And that was really, really awakening. It's like, I'm I don't wanna be Louis Vuitton rich. I wanna be REI rich. Like, I'm a camper too.
I I don't know if you know this about me, but I have a little van house that I drive around. And so I head west for winter because I'm always trying to escape the snow, but unless I'm skiing on it. But for me, it was that awakening of, like, what is my definition of success? So we talk a lot about that here, and I wanna ask you that question. At this season, what is your definition of success?
Speaker 1: People keep asking me this, and I struggle to answer it. Mhmm. It's I've been, like, goofing. Last time someone asked I I literally been goofing when people ask me this question because, like, me in five years, exact same person but in better shape.
Speaker 0: Okay. Yep.
Speaker 1: And and the reason I say that is, like, I feel like what I'm doing now is in direct alignment with who I am and where I wanna be. Yeah. And when I define success, like, if I were to break it down into a nerdy algorithm Yeah. There's impact, there's joy, there's fulfillment, and there is time. And ideally, I'm able to be in the middle of all those quadrants.
So how can I make the greatest impact in the least amount of time while feeling a lot of joy, but being fulfilled as well? Because there's a lot of things in this world that will make you a lot of impact. Let's say impact could be a lot of things, but let's just use dollars as an example. Money. Impact.
You can make a lot of money doing something that doesn't bring you joy and isn't fulfilling.
Speaker 0: Truly.
Speaker 1: You can also make a lot of money if you put a ton of time into something, which is sometimes required. But ideally, I'm gonna make better money in less time while feeling fulfilled and joyful doing it. And you're never gonna get a 10 out of 10 on all of those. I hate when people give 10 out of tens on anything in this because we're constantly evolving. Like Mhmm.
Not every single moment's gonna be a 10 out of 10 joyful, but it will be fulfilling. Some things will take more time than others. But for me, it's how do I optimize those four categories. It's not a specific number. It's not a specific way.
Specific number of people even though I think I have in the bio impact a million careers one conversation at a time. Right. A big vision is great for casting that vision. But to me, it's every single day, am I in alignment with who I am and who I am becoming? Is it bringing me joy?
Is it bringing me fulfillment? Am I doing it as time efficient as possible? And I'm making an impact. And then all you do is you get better at all those categories and you continue to evolve and hit new stages, so on and so forth. So but the reality is I don't know if I would do anything differently.
I'm just trying to do what I'm doing now a little bit better.
Speaker 0: Yes. You have it in your intro, and and we have a little mini course here of moving the needle. And it's exactly what you're speaking about. Move it just a little bit. We're not going from zero to ten.
We're going from four to five and then five to six. You know? I and I really appreciate that because incremental growth is sustainable growth. And, yes, there are there is nuance to that, but three to 10 isn't necessarily sustainable. And so I think, I just appreciate that insight, and I appreciate our listeners getting a chance to hear from people that are successful at things they'd like to be doing.
Say, I did that a little bit at a time, and I'm doing that a little bit at a time. And so my next question for you is, what have you had to give up to get here? What have you had to let go of to get to this point?
Speaker 1: Dang. I don't know if I like answering this question. When I first started in the business, I wasn't in the best mental or emotional place. Like, the click bait is, like, started a business and replaces a sales executive income in a year. Yeah.
That's like the click bait. Mhmm. What people didn't see is it took my entire life of struggle and failure and mistakes and skill building to even get to a point where I was lucky enough to be able to pull that feet off during the pandemic. Yeah. But part of it was literally, like, I I never actually wrote down how much I was working.
Yeah. But I would wake up and do a work related task. Now I'm very passionate about what I do. I don't like the word work. But in reality, it was a work related task.
Yeah. I would wake up, I would start, and then at the end, like, my girlfriend would watch Netflix. I would be watching next to her, but working the whole time.
Speaker 0: Yeah.
Speaker 1: And I literally was on my laptop, like, the entire waking hours.
Speaker 0: Yes. And
Speaker 1: then I understand the time that I'm not on my laptop. I'm on my phone. Mhmm. And it was early on in business, but we like to go on a music cruise off in jam cruise. And I didn't go because I'm like, if I'm off my laptop, everything's gonna burn to the ground.
And this is just an example of many of the things that, like, my relationships weren't going great. I wasn't getting outside as much. It's been almost three years that I hired a personal trainer. But at the early part of the pandemic, I was just letting my body go, my health go. I wasn't being mindful of my decision making.
I would like, at the start of it, just binge drink and play Xbox for two days straight. And then I moved into obsession with that, to obsession in the business. So I was very unbalanced and I feel like I needed it. Again, I went from three to 10, and it was okay for a time, but it wasn't long term sustainable.
Speaker 0: Yeah. I appreciate the transparency with that. And if someone is resonating with what you just shared, what sort of advice or guidance would you offer them to sort of break those disempowering patterns and and make a positive shift?
Speaker 1: It took me a while to figure this out, and I call it the 2% rule. And a lot of people teach you habits, And I was optimized as heck. That's one thing that's really important for people to understand. I was doing a basically, a version of A Miracle Morning by Hal Elrod. And the simple version, for anyone listening, I recommend you do this.
I'm not saying habits are bad. Silence, affirmations, visualization, exercise, reading, scribing. So silence every morning, meditation, affirmations, visualizing my future, feeling the emotion of it, exercise, reading, and scribing or journaling and writing. I had been optimized as heck for years on end. The problem wasn't my morning rituals or my morning habits.
The problem was the decisions I would make after my morning. The spending two days drinking or spending an afternoon, like, scrolling my phone or looking at porn or not spending time with family, like, all the things. It wasn't the things that I was doing in the morning that was the problem. Mhmm. What was not allowing the cream to rise to the surface was the fact that I was suppressing all the good stuff with bad stuff.
Mhmm. And I got nerdy one day, and I figured out, well, what's 1% of the day? Mhmm. And 1% of the day is literally fourteen and a half minutes. So to simplify the algorithm, you just round it up to 15.
So one percent of your day is fifteen minutes. So as I went through the silence information, I used to teach this stuff. If you're not doing positive daily tiny habits, integrate one of those. But you're like, I'm busy. Like, I don't have time to integrate this new stuff.
I'm already, like, overloaded. Okay. So what we need to do is figure out what we can subtract 1% of. So am I scrolling my phone fifteen minutes too long? Am I watching Netflix fifteen minutes too long?
Am I on YouTube a little bit too long? Am I gossiping a little bit too long? What if I just did that fifteen minutes less a day? And that'll be a 1% change. And guess what happens?
Now that you have the fifteen minutes, you can integrate a good habit to replace the bad one and addition through subtraction by not doing something for 1% and by doing another thing by 1%. You just made a 2% difference in your day, and it only took you fifteen minutes to do it. And I love that. For anyone who hasn't started, do that. For anyone who's over optimized, your goal is to subtract.
Because I think that subtraction people think that self care is a massage. I get massages. I love it. But self care can also be just getting rid of the bad stuff.
Speaker 0: Yeah. I couldn't agree more. And and that rest is an active self care thing for a high achiever. You know? So it it there's so many, but that was brilliant.
So thank you because that is so tangible. That is so applicable right now today. One, people have spent you know, I feel like this is one of those one percent activities, listening to a positive impact podcast. Hell, yeah. And as soon as this episode ends, spend the next fifteen minutes on yourself doing something that's gonna, you know, improve your day or your life.
So I I really appreciate that. I can And one
Speaker 1: more thing to make it even more applicable. Please. Yes. You take a pen and paper. You draw a line down the paper, or you can do it on a desktop, but the visual, just draw a line.
Two categories, better, bitter.
Speaker 0: Yeah.
Speaker 1: Write down all the stuff that makes you better, then get wild. Write down all the things that make you bitter and pissed off. Yeah. Yeah. And don't try to be a hero overnight.
Just circle one better action and one bitter action, and now you have exactly what to do next.
Speaker 0: That's fantastic. I love it. Thank you. I I can't wait to hear which which of our listeners say, oh, that was great idea. That started it.
You know? That's awesome. And before we begin to wrap up there, I have one more question for you, Anne. I wanna make sure, where can people connect with you?
Speaker 1: So I always like to make sure because this is your show, your audience. It's amazing. I'm a newbie here. So I'm gonna double check, but I'm pretty sure I already clicked subscribe. Yeah.
Somewhere on the screen, there might be a thumb up or a five star or a comment or a view. Y'all do that now because it tells the algorithm that this is good stuff. It helps us out. So if y'all could do that right now, that's great. You can find my show wherever you found this or just googling real business connections.
Real business connections, pretty easy to spell or just Google it. And if we didn't really talk about this much, but what I'm building behind the scenes, it really is a community of entrepreneurs. Some people aren't entrepreneurs, but they're intrepreneurs. They're in marketing or sales. And our goal is not done for you or done with you.
It's literally done together services. We all grow together. We all mastermind and learn together. So if you're an entrepreneur or aspire to be one, that's where I'd recommend they go to weallgrowtogether.com. It's a community called Grow Getters Only, but that's a three step process.
Step one is show some love here. If you want more podcasts after you subscribe here, then subscribe to Real Business Connections. And then if you want more hands on support, actual interaction with me and my guests, then you would go to We Other. That's a lot of words. Weallgrowtogether.com.
That was a lot, but I hope that made sense.
Speaker 0: No. That was perfect. And I it reminded me, I wanted to ask about about what Grow Getters Only was, so that that was brilliant. Thank you for adding that. And then, you have Balbert Marketing too.
What is that?
Speaker 1: Yeah. So Balbert Marketing technically is the business and then Grow Getters Only and Real Business Connections or sub businesses under Baubert Marketing. But it literally, at the core was, it's August 2020. I don't wanna get sued because I'm technically a competitor to my prior employer. So I register an LLC, and my name's Ben Albert.
So I call it Balbert. Within one week, one of my friends, like, no one even calls you Balbert. And I'm like, that's not the point. That's not the point. So so I've actually long term, I'm probably gonna dissolve the name because Real Business Connections to me is a bigger, more beautiful brand that I think one day could be sold and have greater impact.
Balbert's way too ego. It's just my name. But Balbert Marketing is doing local marketing. Real Business Connections is doing a podcast and podcast production, and then Grow Getters Only is doing the community mastermind building. So they're three legs to the same creature because all of it is bridging the gap of impact, getting the knowledge to where it needs to be.
Speaker 0: I love that. I appreciate that. And you guys, Grow Getters only. And always know we have all these links and notes and connections in the show notes at heartsunleashed.com. So you can grab that on the, search by title page or the podcast page, follow along.
But, thank you for encouraging people like and subscribe and do all those things and stay connected. But I think you're doing a fantastic job, and, it's just very exciting to be a part of and to learn a little bit more about. So thank you.
Speaker 1: Same to you, Abigail. I think
Speaker 0: you're doing amazing. Thank you. I appreciate that. And our last question that we ask most of our guests is, what does it look like for Ben's heart to be unleashed?
Speaker 1: Wow. I didn't prep this one. That's a beautiful big question. That's amazing. That's sweet.
My heart to be unleashed. So this doesn't answer the question, but it gets close to it. And this is gonna be contrarian. I'd rather completely fail being exactly who I am than succeed trying to be someone I'm not. I would rather never make the money goals that I have, never have the impact that I have.
God forbid this happened, but never have any of the blanks, but do it as Ben Mhmm. Than put on a mask the rest of my life and do it as someone I'm not. So I think my heart being unleashed is literally just stepping in to who I am, and I'm not an expert. I find a new piece and part of myself every single day. So, that's how I believe I'd answer that question.
Speaker 0: Fantastic. I didn't say it explicitly. There was a lot of your answers that the undercurrent is self mastery. Like, just mastery of self, mastery of being human, of navigating this wild, wild world. And so I think there's just so many gems for our listeners to get to enjoy and carry into their day and implement into their life.
So I just wanna say thank you. That was a great answer, for so many reasons. I appreciate you.
Speaker 1: Thanks so much.
Speaker 0: And hearts, thank you so much for listening. I hope you did get exactly what you needed. I and maybe more and and implement this into your life, continue the integration, and, of course, continue unleashing your big beautiful heart. Thank you for tuning in to the Hearts Unleashed podcast where we are turning dreamers into doers. We love you.
Thanks for tuning in to the Hearts Unleashed podcast. We hope you found all the inspiration that you needed and that you use it to take inspired action on your dreams. If you love the show, share it with with a friend. We love spreading the love. For more information, to listen to more episodes, and shop hearts unleashed, visit heartsunleashed.com.
See you next time hearts.
