201: The Quiet Roar: Stop Pretending You Are Fine with Louise Budgen

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Welcome to the Harnessing Happiness podcast.

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and I am absolutely thrilled as I bring

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harnessing happiness back after a short I say

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short hiatus just over a year of pressing

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pause for other projects and other things but

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I have got the fabulous the awesome the

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wonderful Louise budget back as a guest which

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is just I'm absolutely thrilled I'm absolutely thrilled

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in fact Louise is how this episode is

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happening because she reached out to me said

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it's a pause but oh no let's redo

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it it's exciting yes absolutely can you tell

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I'm a little bit excited Louise has already

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been a guest twice before her episodes have

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been downloaded in the hundreds and I'm just

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really excited to bring forth more from Louise

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because I love being in her company more

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than anything I think perhaps a little bit

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selfish but anyway let's talk about Louise Louise

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is a coach she is a storyteller and

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she is also the author of the quiet

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roar stop pretending you are fine right let's

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dig in Louise welcome back and thank you

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for inspiring me to bring harnessing happiness back

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right now say hello to my awesome audience

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hello and I can't tell you I am

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also excited to be back in Sarah's world

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so get ready for for a conversation like

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no other because when we start we have

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a habit of flying off in lots of

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different exciting directions but it all makes sense

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to us so we hope it makes sense

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to you but Louise are honestly really welcome

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back and I'm so excited your book is

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just awesome and I can't wait for us

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to sort of dig into it I suppose

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really we ought to start at the beginning

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though what inspired you to write the book

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I mean I know your story but it's

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not for me to tell it it's can

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you share with everyone you know where it

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all started what I loved about reading your

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book myself everything resonated with me because it's

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all how I live my life anyway but

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even though I live my life by your

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belief system and everything that you talk about

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it's such a fantastic reminder because you go

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oh god yes I forgot about that oh

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yeah there's a name for that oh there's

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just there's just so many points for anybody

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that's curious or even on the same path

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so the book actually took five years from

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from the first words being handwritten to to

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me actually writing it editing and publishing it

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so five years is a long time and

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it's not five years of writing Sarah it

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was five years of part one and part

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two dropped down to me in COVID actually

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when I was sitting the oak tree one

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day and I had just finished reading Big

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Magic by Elizabeth Gilbert where she talks about

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creative energy and when that comes to honour

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it and I thought well hold on a

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minute I think I'm about to start writing

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my book I've always known I was going

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to write a book which I reckon there'll

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be lots of listeners and viewers that will

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think I know I'm going to write a

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book so I say don't wait you know

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listen to your creative energy and let that

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creative start to flow so I wrote quite

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a lot of words under the oak tree

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over four days three thirty thousand actually and

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I had by hand I had wrist ache

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I put it to one side because there's

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something guiding me to say right you you've

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you've got that now in rough form you

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the next part of your book hasn't actually

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been written because you've got to experience it

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and that was the last five years so

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it was only last year when a lovely

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friend of mine said please finish your book

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Louise the world needs to hear what you've

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got to say on so many different topics

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and lots of those topics weave through the

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book I thought you know I'm going to

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because actually the last five years are my

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part three so the quiet roar is a

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journey that I take myself on and invite

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you to walk with me essentially is a

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walk back to truth across lots of different

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topics you'd obviously done those 30,000 words

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when we met because it was 20 21

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I think that we met doing an online

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programme I felt like I was I was

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in some sort of sort of cyclone I

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don't know I didn't really quite understand what

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I was doing but what I did gain

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from it was you obviously meeting yourself and

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some so many other amazing people from across

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the globe which has been part of my

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journey but that was part of your journey

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of course as well as you go into

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in in the book and of course having

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met you earlier on I knew when I

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was reading the book I'm going what about

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this bit what about that bit but you

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know you as you said yourself you needed

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to go on that journey to carry on

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with your experience of life I mean I

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know a big focus of the book is

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is trusting your intuition well in fact you've

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got your five T's haven't you you've got

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trust time test transitions and truth which is

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the truth of who we are and who

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we're meant to be and digging into all

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of that because I think we get oh

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gosh here we go this this so much

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and I know you are a hundred percent

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with me on this the noise the narrative

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the stuff that's out there that is trying

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to control us to be something that somebody

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else wants us to be not actually who

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we are and as you rightly say our

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superpower is our intuition it is knowing that

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and that's what you talk about so beautifully

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in the book and you hold the reader

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rather than so many of these books that

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are do this do that follow my blueprint

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this is it's not about a blueprint you

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are your own blueprint so I love how

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you hold the readers hand and share your

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story as well so I mean how much

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of your story would you like to share

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right now because it's it's pretty yet you've

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been through it haven't you Louise let's face

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it I've had a number of challenges shall

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we say and I believe there are now

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zooming out on my own life and obviously

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having written the book they were all part

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of my story to be a book one

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day so I could help other people who

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may have one of my challenges they may

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have been challenged by illness they may have

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been challenged by family relationships they may have

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been challenged by horrible car accident they may

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have been challenged by never feeling like they

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were enough there's so many different things we've

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through and I really wanted people to realise

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it's not this book is about me but

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it's not about me it's about you it's

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about you owning who you are in your

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your uniqueness and your brilliant sparkly energy that

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you have underneath what can feel heavy in

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life I sit here now and I am

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a completely different person but nothing's actually essentially

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changed I still live in the same house

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I've got the same husband I've got the

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same kid la la la but my perspective

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on life has changed because I've cleared out

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I've got out of my own way and

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the energy then is pure and sparkly and

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it's creative and that gives you flow in

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in life and and how you how you

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turn up for your day I mean we

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call it doing the inner work I mean

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people say well what is the inner work

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but it is it's about being curious isn't

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it and you mentioned the word perspective and

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it's about getting out of your own way

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because actually the words in fact that was

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one of the pages I've highlighted in the

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book about the words and the dialogue that

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we use because once you understand how powerful

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language is in the way you think you

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speak you write and how you the perspective

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you have on what you're experiencing once you

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change that narrative you experience the world in

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a completely different way but your examples because

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of your lived truth that I mean if

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you flipped all of that and took the

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negative you would be a completely different person

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and yet whenever I'm in your energy I

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just always I always feel like I've been

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washed with calm when I love that it's

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just lovely it's just that I've been with

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Louise again to that point sometimes partners will

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say to their wife or girlfriend do you

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not need to go and see Louise do

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you not need to go out for lunch

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and we will go and have a session

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with Louise it's it's a feeling that I

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know I have that I know I have

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that ability to make people see them themselves

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in a sparkly energy and that's that's my

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that's my gift Sarah I leave people better

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than I found them but in answer to

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your question again it's it's the going through

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the challenges it's people said to me many

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times with my illness which was cancer twice

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oh why you it's so unfair you've already

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been through so much and I used to

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say to myself why not me I'm I'm

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no different from anybody else but I saw

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I saw each challenge that I've had as

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an opportunity to grow and learn I didn't

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see each challenge as a whoa me oh

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my god language is so important when you

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talked about that a minute ago because when

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I had cancer I really threw myself into

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the research of how cancer comes to be

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and what I could do to help myself

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and there are so many books so many

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fabulous people that can help you research that

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I was on a show yesterday cancer active

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Chris Woolham Sunday show and without him I

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might not be here because he speaks the

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common sense of cancer so it's becoming curious

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as a person that's been challenged not to

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say oh well nothing I can do I'll

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probably be I'll probably be really unwell then

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I'll probably die no I never ever thought

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that but the biology there's a fantastic book

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biology of belief and I started to visualise

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myself being healthy healthy cells pinging up all

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over my body and I know I healed

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myself whole Sarah I know I did because

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of my mind because it's not everything starts

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in your mind so people you say you're

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amazing Louisiana bald head you look like death

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grey and no hair no nothing anywhere but

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I felt fine I was always smiling not

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always mine but I could smile because actually

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I knew I was healing and I knew

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I I was lucky that I had found

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this opportunity to develop and grow personally that

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might sound a bit strange to something especially

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if you're in the middle of cancer and

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you haven't got that perspective but I like

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to say please be curious about healing yourself

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you can go out in nature look at

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your food look at your language because it

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all matters absolutely one of my coaching clients

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have been working with the last three years

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she healed herself through leukaemia she was in

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hospital but she just spent all that time

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focussing on healing and she healed herself through

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the leukaemia so the power of the mind

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cannot be underestimated I mean obviously in today's

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world we have got an amazing amount of

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scientific knowledge which obviously helps and I know

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you I mean you've been through the system

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and I know it's not something we're going

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to particularly dwell upon today but a big

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part of that was your intuition in in

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the knowing the inner knowing because you were

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tuned into your body which again is really

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really important I mean I had issues when

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I was pregnant and I knew I was

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fine but I was going down the medical

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route to have for my son to have

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a blood transfusion while I was in the

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womb which didn't actually happen but all the

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time I felt within myself I felt absolutely

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fine but you know when you tune into

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your body but it's taking that time to

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be still isn't it to to listen to

268
00:12:09,420 --> 00:12:13,500
feel because we we know we've I hear

269
00:12:13,500 --> 00:12:15,360
people going well there's a chatter done yet

270
00:12:15,360 --> 00:12:18,640
we've got we've got two bits that chatter

271
00:12:18,640 --> 00:12:20,560
in our brain haven't we've got the that

272
00:12:20,560 --> 00:12:23,700
nice calm supportive voice which is the intuition

273
00:12:23,700 --> 00:12:25,860
then you've got the ego mindset that's going

274
00:12:25,860 --> 00:12:29,360
but once you recognise the two you can

275
00:12:29,360 --> 00:12:32,640
sound that one out trust in this one

276
00:12:32,640 --> 00:12:35,540
and you can you can actually rise above

277
00:12:35,540 --> 00:12:37,400
both of them because you have it's like

278
00:12:37,400 --> 00:12:39,480
being in the driving driving a car isn't

279
00:12:39,480 --> 00:12:41,940
it you have control over what your thoughts

280
00:12:41,940 --> 00:12:44,160
are so when you capture yourself having a

281
00:12:44,160 --> 00:12:46,700
negative thought it's about reframing that and then

282
00:12:46,700 --> 00:12:49,580
going actually what's the positive reframe of that

283
00:12:49,580 --> 00:12:51,800
how can I take advantage of this what

284
00:12:51,800 --> 00:12:53,360
can I do to heal myself how can

285
00:12:53,360 --> 00:12:55,340
I think positive I'm going all tingly Louise

286
00:12:55,340 --> 00:12:58,940
that that is a sign so Sarah you're

287
00:12:58,940 --> 00:13:01,700
absolutely right and the quiet rule when I

288
00:13:01,700 --> 00:13:05,280
really got down last year to actually really

289
00:13:05,280 --> 00:13:09,360
bringing all the parts together I knew that

290
00:13:09,360 --> 00:13:11,080
this was a powerful book and the first

291
00:13:11,080 --> 00:13:14,240
person I gave to read most of it

292
00:13:14,240 --> 00:13:16,920
she said this book will save lives because

293
00:13:16,920 --> 00:13:21,240
straight away saw that thread of when you

294
00:13:21,240 --> 00:13:25,160
trust yourself in a medical situation you are

295
00:13:25,160 --> 00:13:27,600
going to be brushed aside I've lost two

296
00:13:27,600 --> 00:13:29,760
friends to cancer because they didn't ask uncomfortable

297
00:13:29,760 --> 00:13:32,420
questions they didn't like to be made a

298
00:13:32,420 --> 00:13:35,560
nuisance they didn't they didn't trust themselves enough

299
00:13:35,560 --> 00:13:38,980
to ask the questions they were they didn't

300
00:13:38,980 --> 00:13:41,200
know and maybe I had to lose two

301
00:13:41,200 --> 00:13:43,540
friends to cancer to to when it came

302
00:13:43,540 --> 00:13:46,980
to to my scenario or my story that

303
00:13:46,980 --> 00:13:50,960
I could say it happens use your own

304
00:13:50,960 --> 00:13:53,400
intuitive power so when your bottom hits the

305
00:13:53,400 --> 00:13:56,600
seat in the doctors and the science says

306
00:13:56,600 --> 00:13:59,080
everything's fine but you still know it's not

307
00:13:59,080 --> 00:14:03,600
carry on pushing on for more tests say

308
00:14:03,600 --> 00:14:05,700
you do know because that is why I'm

309
00:14:05,700 --> 00:14:08,840
here because both times I was dismissed as

310
00:14:08,840 --> 00:14:11,440
a neurotic middle-aged woman there's nothing wrong

311
00:14:11,440 --> 00:14:15,200
with you one doctor actually shook her hands

312
00:14:15,200 --> 00:14:16,820
above her head said for goodness sake Louise

313
00:14:16,820 --> 00:14:17,940
go and get on with your life you

314
00:14:17,940 --> 00:14:21,520
haven't got cancer I mean yeah yeah we

315
00:14:21,520 --> 00:14:23,660
have to find our quiet rule and that's

316
00:14:23,660 --> 00:14:24,880
why I call it quiet rule it's not

317
00:14:24,880 --> 00:14:27,600
about being hysterical it's not about shouting and

318
00:14:27,600 --> 00:14:30,640
blaming it's just about owning what is coming

319
00:14:30,640 --> 00:14:34,620
through for you and saying no you have

320
00:14:34,620 --> 00:14:37,800
to listen to me and and that one

321
00:14:37,800 --> 00:14:39,360
of the big strong messages I want the

322
00:14:39,360 --> 00:14:41,220
book to come through with because there is

323
00:14:41,220 --> 00:14:43,380
a lot of of that still happening no

324
00:14:43,380 --> 00:14:47,400
well unfortunately it is it's this societal societal

325
00:14:47,400 --> 00:14:52,060
patriarchal narrative that's come through mainstream media and

326
00:14:52,060 --> 00:14:54,180
you know you start to talk about how

327
00:14:54,180 --> 00:14:57,180
other people are responding but they're a product

328
00:14:57,180 --> 00:14:59,360
of all of this narrative as well and

329
00:14:59,360 --> 00:15:01,420
that's why everything has to come back to

330
00:15:01,420 --> 00:15:04,100
the self you have to take responsibility for

331
00:15:04,100 --> 00:15:06,940
you it's not anybody else's responsibility to how

332
00:15:06,940 --> 00:15:09,720
you feel how you are how you experience

333
00:15:09,720 --> 00:15:12,500
life because it is all down to you

334
00:15:12,500 --> 00:15:14,760
and it's about loving yourself as well it's

335
00:15:14,760 --> 00:15:17,400
the power to love yourself it's not being

336
00:15:17,400 --> 00:15:20,240
selfish it's self-care at its highest you

337
00:15:20,240 --> 00:15:22,320
know you've got to look after yourself and

338
00:15:22,320 --> 00:15:23,940
you have to look after yourself first and

339
00:15:23,940 --> 00:15:26,400
foremost because it's like they say I mean

340
00:15:26,400 --> 00:15:29,720
it's a stereotypical analogy but when they're on

341
00:15:29,720 --> 00:15:31,940
an airline and they say get your own

342
00:15:31,940 --> 00:15:35,020
air you know oxygen on first look after

343
00:15:35,020 --> 00:15:36,560
yourself first before you start to look after

344
00:15:36,560 --> 00:15:38,740
anybody else because you you can't you can't

345
00:15:38,740 --> 00:15:42,580
operate on empty you've got to be fuelled

346
00:15:42,580 --> 00:15:45,300
up to be able to help anybody else

347
00:15:45,300 --> 00:15:46,940
it's really interesting to say that because in

348
00:15:46,940 --> 00:15:49,460
the book you see how I was completely

349
00:15:49,460 --> 00:15:53,980
on empty and the first part of the

350
00:15:53,980 --> 00:15:57,060
book called unravel is and I am no

351
00:15:57,060 --> 00:16:00,600
very typical woman of a certain age I've

352
00:16:00,600 --> 00:16:04,620
amazed a family working etc etc and I

353
00:16:04,620 --> 00:16:07,380
really wanted to weave that in to show

354
00:16:07,380 --> 00:16:10,200
that it's not how we're supposed to live

355
00:16:10,200 --> 00:16:12,080
it is not how we're supposed to live

356
00:16:12,080 --> 00:16:15,400
really isn't we're not doing which is one

357
00:16:15,400 --> 00:16:17,560
of my favourites we're a human being so

358
00:16:17,560 --> 00:16:21,180
that's a really important part that I hope

359
00:16:21,180 --> 00:16:23,800
is left in the heart reader that they

360
00:16:23,800 --> 00:16:26,340
think hold on a minute I am doing

361
00:16:26,340 --> 00:16:28,860
too much where am I looking after myself

362
00:16:28,860 --> 00:16:32,060
where am I just allowing some space to

363
00:16:32,060 --> 00:16:34,080
just have nothing in my diary I mean

364
00:16:34,080 --> 00:16:36,240
I have friend and she came over him

365
00:16:36,240 --> 00:16:38,200
she showed me her diary and I almost

366
00:16:38,200 --> 00:16:41,160
almost fainted she had no space for anything

367
00:16:41,160 --> 00:16:44,540
but she's just changed so that's good life

368
00:16:44,540 --> 00:16:47,740
is short we've got to not panic about

369
00:16:47,740 --> 00:16:51,140
life being short but look after ourselves really

370
00:16:51,140 --> 00:16:54,200
look after us it's interesting I didn't know

371
00:16:54,200 --> 00:16:56,840
the full extent of your backstory if you

372
00:16:56,840 --> 00:16:58,940
like and I for somebody that spent 36

373
00:16:58,940 --> 00:17:02,040
years in recruitment you know I always find

374
00:17:02,040 --> 00:17:03,920
I like to hear all the pieces of

375
00:17:03,920 --> 00:17:05,579
the part the puzzle I like to understand

376
00:17:05,579 --> 00:17:07,280
you know why people are the way they

377
00:17:07,280 --> 00:17:09,540
are I'm just obviously I like people that's

378
00:17:09,540 --> 00:17:11,220
why I like coachings you do as well

379
00:17:11,220 --> 00:17:13,420
but how busy busy you were and then

380
00:17:13,420 --> 00:17:15,260
all of the house and doing all of

381
00:17:15,260 --> 00:17:18,400
that I'm gonna holy moly yeah and I

382
00:17:18,400 --> 00:17:21,119
it resonated with me because having spent you

383
00:17:21,119 --> 00:17:23,260
know recruitment is a similar sort of sector

384
00:17:23,260 --> 00:17:24,780
to the one that you've been working in

385
00:17:24,780 --> 00:17:26,160
you're busy you're on it all the time

386
00:17:26,160 --> 00:17:28,500
and it suits my personality to be perfectly

387
00:17:28,500 --> 00:17:30,820
frank you know I like that variety I

388
00:17:30,820 --> 00:17:33,020
like that busyness but then you start to

389
00:17:33,020 --> 00:17:34,660
have this dialogue oh yeah I'm busy doing

390
00:17:34,660 --> 00:17:37,240
you have been conditioned by society to think

391
00:17:37,240 --> 00:17:39,240
that that's what success means you've got your

392
00:17:39,240 --> 00:17:41,220
busy busy busy busy busy but it's not

393
00:17:41,220 --> 00:17:43,380
it's about understanding yourself I mean I'm sitting

394
00:17:43,380 --> 00:17:45,740
here recording this in my lounge looking out

395
00:17:45,740 --> 00:17:47,700
of the window having moved two and a

396
00:17:47,700 --> 00:17:49,200
half years ago and I've got a front

397
00:17:49,200 --> 00:17:50,900
garden that's just looks like a cottage garden

398
00:17:50,900 --> 00:17:52,580
don't live in a cottage it's a 70s

399
00:17:52,580 --> 00:17:55,100
bungalow but you know it's just everything's just

400
00:17:55,100 --> 00:17:56,740
been allowed to grow all the wild poppies

401
00:17:56,740 --> 00:17:59,760
and wild marigolds and it's just beautiful and

402
00:17:59,760 --> 00:18:02,340
it's just appreciating even the small stuff and

403
00:18:02,340 --> 00:18:05,140
looking at the detail and just enjoying the

404
00:18:05,140 --> 00:18:07,860
beauty of what is and having those moments

405
00:18:07,860 --> 00:18:09,740
of stillness because all the time we're busy

406
00:18:09,740 --> 00:18:11,340
busy busy leaping from one thing to the

407
00:18:11,340 --> 00:18:14,280
next you don't have that time to breathe

408
00:18:14,280 --> 00:18:16,780
you know I mean I was busy on

409
00:18:16,780 --> 00:18:18,240
Saturdays I did park run in the morning

410
00:18:18,240 --> 00:18:19,820
then we we flew home and then we

411
00:18:19,820 --> 00:18:21,820
flew down to the beach to have a

412
00:18:21,820 --> 00:18:25,020
high tide sea swim lovely you know I

413
00:18:25,020 --> 00:18:27,360
was just lovely like just in in the

414
00:18:27,360 --> 00:18:29,840
sea for half an hour just sort of

415
00:18:29,840 --> 00:18:33,940
bobbing about it's not really swimming it's just

416
00:18:33,940 --> 00:18:36,140
sort of bobbing about and chatting and it's

417
00:18:36,140 --> 00:18:38,820
just taking that time isn't it to to

418
00:18:38,820 --> 00:18:41,360
be and you were so busy and that's

419
00:18:41,360 --> 00:18:43,560
I think that's when was that the car

420
00:18:43,560 --> 00:18:45,860
accident that then happened as well yes the

421
00:18:45,860 --> 00:18:48,200
car accident then happened and I was diagnosed

422
00:18:48,200 --> 00:18:51,020
with so so from being as I talk

423
00:18:51,020 --> 00:18:52,320
about myself in the book as the Queen

424
00:18:52,320 --> 00:18:55,140
of juggling which I was literally people used

425
00:18:55,140 --> 00:18:56,260
to say I'll give it to the Queen

426
00:18:56,260 --> 00:18:58,440
of juggling she'll find a little to pick

427
00:18:58,440 --> 00:19:01,640
up and and do that with and I

428
00:19:01,640 --> 00:19:03,740
do believe and that's where the book starts

429
00:19:03,740 --> 00:19:06,340
when the universe called my name because I

430
00:19:06,340 --> 00:19:09,380
do think that car accident did reroute me

431
00:19:09,380 --> 00:19:12,460
and I ended up with PTSD which if

432
00:19:12,460 --> 00:19:15,320
anybody's had that you just realise how horrendous

433
00:19:15,320 --> 00:19:19,000
that is and I wouldn't have been able

434
00:19:19,000 --> 00:19:20,780
to name a ball let alone pick a

435
00:19:20,780 --> 00:19:24,200
ball up afterwards I was just not not

436
00:19:24,200 --> 00:19:28,080
well for many many months and again I

437
00:19:28,080 --> 00:19:30,120
was let down by the the system shall

438
00:19:30,120 --> 00:19:33,320
we say and who were very much oh

439
00:19:33,320 --> 00:19:35,280
please stop something nothing wrong with you why

440
00:19:35,280 --> 00:19:37,380
don't you start going jogging one doctor said

441
00:19:37,380 --> 00:19:39,320
to me when when I was like this

442
00:19:39,320 --> 00:19:41,020
so because that's the way I'd stopped in

443
00:19:41,020 --> 00:19:45,320
the accident my evil and you it was

444
00:19:45,320 --> 00:19:49,280
it was only through being honest and vulnerable

445
00:19:49,280 --> 00:19:51,040
with friends that I then met a beautiful

446
00:19:51,040 --> 00:19:54,300
psychotherapist who did the EMDR treatment with me

447
00:19:54,300 --> 00:19:56,640
on literally on the first session my shoulders

448
00:19:56,640 --> 00:19:59,720
came down here which was wonderful and I

449
00:19:59,720 --> 00:20:01,180
came back on my young son at the

450
00:20:01,180 --> 00:20:02,400
time he said mom it's like you've been

451
00:20:02,400 --> 00:20:05,440
switched back on and I actually felt I

452
00:20:05,440 --> 00:20:07,200
had been switched back on because with the

453
00:20:07,200 --> 00:20:11,260
right treatment and the right solution to the

454
00:20:11,260 --> 00:20:14,440
problem searching for that and it was by

455
00:20:14,440 --> 00:20:16,640
being vulnerable with a friend and talking to

456
00:20:16,640 --> 00:20:17,840
her that she then went away and she

457
00:20:17,840 --> 00:20:19,740
said you know I wonder whether you should

458
00:20:19,740 --> 00:20:22,120
go and see and that's how that started

459
00:20:22,120 --> 00:20:26,140
so that holding it all together Louise and

460
00:20:26,140 --> 00:20:28,500
not I'm pretending she was fine she could

461
00:20:28,500 --> 00:20:31,020
not do that any longer because something was

462
00:20:31,020 --> 00:20:32,220
given to her the way she had to

463
00:20:32,220 --> 00:20:34,380
be vulnerable she she cried all the time

464
00:20:34,380 --> 00:20:36,420
she watched TV all the time she ate

465
00:20:36,420 --> 00:20:37,920
biscuits and drank tea all the time that's

466
00:20:37,920 --> 00:20:39,400
not me again I see that as part

467
00:20:39,400 --> 00:20:44,020
of my path so it's about not being

468
00:20:44,020 --> 00:20:49,700
labelled by professionals or friends and family oh

469
00:20:49,700 --> 00:20:53,380
you just need a holiday or it's understanding

470
00:20:53,380 --> 00:20:55,140
what you need and I knew I needed

471
00:20:55,140 --> 00:20:57,340
something because at the time the doctor just

472
00:20:57,340 --> 00:20:59,180
wanted to put me on antidepressants and I'm

473
00:20:59,180 --> 00:21:01,480
not against antidepressants I talk about that in

474
00:21:01,480 --> 00:21:03,060
the book I have had a course of

475
00:21:03,060 --> 00:21:04,780
them after I had one of my kids

476
00:21:04,780 --> 00:21:07,220
I knew it wasn't that because I trusted

477
00:21:07,220 --> 00:21:09,480
what I knew I trusted what I knew

478
00:21:09,480 --> 00:21:11,140
and I knew that wasn't the answer the

479
00:21:11,140 --> 00:21:14,800
answer was not yet available to me and

480
00:21:14,800 --> 00:21:17,340
maybe I needed to have that first chink

481
00:21:17,340 --> 00:21:20,920
of vulnerability to be able to walk that

482
00:21:20,920 --> 00:21:23,580
that road it's interesting isn't it and I

483
00:21:23,580 --> 00:21:27,240
was just I was just questioning my brain

484
00:21:27,240 --> 00:21:28,960
is always switched to curious and I do

485
00:21:28,960 --> 00:21:32,020
think that all the stuff that's out there

486
00:21:32,020 --> 00:21:34,020
and I'm talking about when we consume it

487
00:21:34,020 --> 00:21:37,460
from the mainstream media to the food to

488
00:21:37,460 --> 00:21:41,000
everything we are being programmed to be controlled

489
00:21:41,000 --> 00:21:44,080
whereas we need to deprogram and understand that

490
00:21:44,080 --> 00:21:45,600
we aren't happy if you think the brain

491
00:21:45,600 --> 00:21:47,780
as a computer programme we can put in

492
00:21:47,780 --> 00:21:49,560
our own recording I mean one of my

493
00:21:49,560 --> 00:21:51,760
favourite phrases that I coined years ago is

494
00:21:51,760 --> 00:21:54,000
life's an illusion of our own creation so

495
00:21:54,000 --> 00:21:55,320
what do you want your life to look

496
00:21:55,320 --> 00:21:57,520
like they're constantly trying to programme us to

497
00:21:57,520 --> 00:22:00,220
believe and not trust ourselves whereas actually we

498
00:22:00,220 --> 00:22:02,280
do need to trust ourselves but where does

499
00:22:02,280 --> 00:22:06,480
that trust Wendy where does that recognition come

500
00:22:06,480 --> 00:22:08,440
from if you if you were explained for

501
00:22:08,440 --> 00:22:11,740
somebody to actually start to recognise how to

502
00:22:11,740 --> 00:22:15,840
trust themselves I know that I think inherently

503
00:22:15,840 --> 00:22:18,560
throughout all of my life I've I think

504
00:22:18,560 --> 00:22:20,340
I've obviously had the right sort of parents

505
00:22:20,340 --> 00:22:22,160
in the right growth upbringing in terms of

506
00:22:22,160 --> 00:22:23,820
what I have learned but then even as

507
00:22:23,820 --> 00:22:26,020
a child you know I've recognised things like

508
00:22:26,020 --> 00:22:27,260
as a ten-year-old my mum saying

509
00:22:27,260 --> 00:22:29,220
oh I don't like tomatoes and I'm thinking

510
00:22:29,220 --> 00:22:31,200
I knew then that I didn't want to

511
00:22:31,200 --> 00:22:35,020
be influenced by mum's decision not to like

512
00:22:35,020 --> 00:22:37,160
tomatoes because I knew that she was influencing

513
00:22:37,160 --> 00:22:39,840
me by her language so I kind of

514
00:22:39,840 --> 00:22:43,680
knew that about eight years old and I

515
00:22:43,680 --> 00:22:46,560
didn't want to be I didn't want to

516
00:22:46,560 --> 00:22:48,200
stop enjoying tomatoes because mum was saying she

517
00:22:48,200 --> 00:22:49,780
didn't like eating tomatoes do you see what

518
00:22:49,780 --> 00:22:52,560
I'm saying I kind of knew that already

519
00:22:52,560 --> 00:22:55,080
then and I was always trusting my instinct

520
00:22:55,080 --> 00:22:57,340
I always knew my own mind and even

521
00:22:57,340 --> 00:22:59,140
if they're my my own minds taken me

522
00:22:59,140 --> 00:23:01,800
on journeys which could be like that was

523
00:23:01,800 --> 00:23:03,520
interesting but then that's the learning that you

524
00:23:03,520 --> 00:23:06,060
get because when I got divorced 21 years

525
00:23:06,060 --> 00:23:07,360
ago I then realised I got a second

526
00:23:07,360 --> 00:23:09,400
stab at life in this lifetime and it's

527
00:23:09,400 --> 00:23:11,740
been I can only just say 21 years

528
00:23:11,740 --> 00:23:16,820
of constant change Louise exciting adventure that's what

529
00:23:16,820 --> 00:23:20,300
I'd like to say exactly trusting yourself is

530
00:23:20,300 --> 00:23:23,360
and and no matter your age you can

531
00:23:23,360 --> 00:23:26,940
do this I absolute because if you want

532
00:23:26,940 --> 00:23:30,480
to learn how to harness happiness let's say

533
00:23:30,480 --> 00:23:35,460
you need to harness yourself as in know

534
00:23:35,460 --> 00:23:39,040
that you can you can trust yourself you

535
00:23:39,040 --> 00:23:41,340
and it is almost like this is what

536
00:23:41,340 --> 00:23:45,620
you're here to to master because life is

537
00:23:45,620 --> 00:23:48,160
meant to be lived with happiness and love

538
00:23:48,160 --> 00:23:51,680
and kindness and fun and enjoyment but unless

539
00:23:51,680 --> 00:23:54,700
you start to trust yourself you will come

540
00:23:54,700 --> 00:23:58,240
so far away from yourself you'll be the

541
00:23:58,240 --> 00:24:01,600
people pleaser you'll be there the party animal

542
00:24:01,600 --> 00:24:03,660
or you'll be the person that everybody drains

543
00:24:03,660 --> 00:24:05,840
of energy so I say bring it back

544
00:24:05,840 --> 00:24:09,020
to yourself make sure you're having some quiet

545
00:24:09,020 --> 00:24:11,920
moments to yourself every single day now people

546
00:24:11,920 --> 00:24:14,080
will probably be rolling their eyes going oh

547
00:24:14,080 --> 00:24:15,980
because this is what used to happen years

548
00:24:15,980 --> 00:24:18,200
ago and it was sated like just do

549
00:24:18,200 --> 00:24:20,280
five minutes meditation a day that oh I'm

550
00:24:20,280 --> 00:24:22,080
not meditating and then they'd say I haven't

551
00:24:22,080 --> 00:24:23,560
got the trousers or I don't write in

552
00:24:23,560 --> 00:24:25,380
says this is not about that this is

553
00:24:25,380 --> 00:24:28,060
just being quiet with yourself because the power

554
00:24:28,060 --> 00:24:30,900
of of stillness that the power of just

555
00:24:30,900 --> 00:24:36,500
sitting and noticing is is the start of

556
00:24:36,500 --> 00:24:38,740
beginning to trust yourself because you are connecting

557
00:24:38,740 --> 00:24:42,820
to yourself but if you can suddenly trust

558
00:24:42,820 --> 00:24:45,880
yourself without taking away the noise without having

559
00:24:45,880 --> 00:24:49,680
these beautiful moments of realisation in the moment

560
00:24:49,680 --> 00:24:52,380
with yourself and it's not for anybody else's

561
00:24:52,380 --> 00:24:56,560
consumption it's just for you you you you're

562
00:24:56,560 --> 00:24:58,140
not going to do it so quite get

563
00:24:58,140 --> 00:25:00,200
quiet first I would say maybe pick up

564
00:25:00,200 --> 00:25:02,140
a pen and just say the last time

565
00:25:02,140 --> 00:25:05,280
I trusted myself was and you might realise

566
00:25:05,280 --> 00:25:06,780
it was actually quite a long time ago

567
00:25:06,780 --> 00:25:09,000
and then you could you could explore that

568
00:25:09,000 --> 00:25:11,360
on the page but when when was that

569
00:25:11,360 --> 00:25:14,600
I last distrusted myself just put the word

570
00:25:14,600 --> 00:25:17,720
trust on a page so the five T's

571
00:25:17,720 --> 00:25:20,540
the true soul five T's are truth because

572
00:25:20,540 --> 00:25:23,140
I believe Sarah everything starts with truth we

573
00:25:23,140 --> 00:25:26,120
have to dig deep into our stuff and

574
00:25:26,120 --> 00:25:27,420
that's the hardest thing for a lot of

575
00:25:27,420 --> 00:25:29,180
people to do they they don't like the

576
00:25:29,180 --> 00:25:31,580
truth but the truth is there to help

577
00:25:31,580 --> 00:25:36,120
you to forward and change things so truth

578
00:25:36,120 --> 00:25:39,060
trust because if we can master trust by

579
00:25:39,060 --> 00:25:41,400
being quiet maybe doing some tools like you

580
00:25:41,400 --> 00:25:44,000
know walking in nature without a podcast apart

581
00:25:44,000 --> 00:25:48,680
from this one spend time in silence don't

582
00:25:48,680 --> 00:25:50,720
pack your days out and your life out

583
00:25:50,720 --> 00:25:54,360
with everything else's concerns and I know that's

584
00:25:54,360 --> 00:25:55,840
hard because if we've got family we've got

585
00:25:55,840 --> 00:25:58,480
elderly parents we've got but you owe it

586
00:25:58,480 --> 00:26:00,820
to yourself to have this time for yourself

587
00:26:00,820 --> 00:26:03,740
in your lifetime your unique meaning this it's

588
00:26:03,740 --> 00:26:06,880
almost like a super boost of energy you

589
00:26:06,880 --> 00:26:10,000
give to yourself that doesn't have any sugar

590
00:26:10,000 --> 00:26:10,980
in it do you know what I mean

591
00:26:10,980 --> 00:26:14,740
and without exploring being curious about yourself we

592
00:26:14,740 --> 00:26:16,280
were all I believe we were all born

593
00:26:16,280 --> 00:26:20,400
for a very particular reason I believe I

594
00:26:20,400 --> 00:26:23,420
am aligned with the first part of my

595
00:26:23,420 --> 00:26:27,120
bigger reason is to get this book out

596
00:26:27,120 --> 00:26:28,960
to share this book with many people as

597
00:26:28,960 --> 00:26:31,720
possible to help them help themselves stop pretending

598
00:26:31,720 --> 00:26:35,080
and start living with truth and realise a

599
00:26:35,080 --> 00:26:38,280
third of the tease is time so I'm

600
00:26:38,280 --> 00:26:39,980
never going to say to anybody oh you

601
00:26:39,980 --> 00:26:42,760
can yeah sign up to my programme I

602
00:26:42,760 --> 00:26:44,820
can treat teach you trust in six weeks

603
00:26:44,820 --> 00:26:46,620
it's not about that because we're all so

604
00:26:46,620 --> 00:26:51,620
unique we're all so beautifully human exactly we'll

605
00:26:51,620 --> 00:26:54,440
come to this how you're supposed to come

606
00:26:54,440 --> 00:26:56,440
to it so give yourself time be patient

607
00:26:56,440 --> 00:27:01,500
the p-word pause have patience be be

608
00:27:01,500 --> 00:27:04,700
available for going backwards as you move forwards

609
00:27:04,700 --> 00:27:07,300
it's all it's all that is what will

610
00:27:07,300 --> 00:27:09,620
happen and then the tests will come so

611
00:27:09,620 --> 00:27:14,020
you'll think you've connected now to myself and

612
00:27:14,020 --> 00:27:15,340
I'm trusting myself and I made it I

613
00:27:15,340 --> 00:27:17,800
didn't self-doubt and things start to flow

614
00:27:17,800 --> 00:27:19,880
and then you'll be tested because that's part

615
00:27:19,880 --> 00:27:22,160
of the journey and it's when you do

616
00:27:22,160 --> 00:27:24,440
the tests as I do now yeah okay

617
00:27:24,440 --> 00:27:27,060
fine okay I can learn from this and

618
00:27:27,060 --> 00:27:29,400
the transitions as well so are there when

619
00:27:29,400 --> 00:27:31,700
you're transitioning in a period of transition that

620
00:27:31,700 --> 00:27:35,240
can feel uncomfortable because people around you are

621
00:27:35,240 --> 00:27:37,480
seeing that you are changing they're not sure

622
00:27:37,480 --> 00:27:39,680
why you're changing but you know you're changing

623
00:27:39,680 --> 00:27:43,800
but you aren't necessarily available for everything in

624
00:27:43,800 --> 00:27:45,880
the same way you used to be so

625
00:27:45,880 --> 00:27:49,920
transition can be tricky as contest the five

626
00:27:49,920 --> 00:27:53,800
T's would definitely help anybody looking to really

627
00:27:53,800 --> 00:27:56,820
start to trust themselves and live I literally

628
00:27:56,820 --> 00:27:59,540
I was asked yesterday on this show about

629
00:27:59,540 --> 00:28:03,040
cancer what's what's cancer what's cancer taught you

630
00:28:03,040 --> 00:28:04,480
most and I said happiness I said I'm

631
00:28:04,480 --> 00:28:07,040
really really happy now and I see cancer

632
00:28:07,040 --> 00:28:09,820
as part of my journey to happiness because

633
00:28:09,820 --> 00:28:11,460
I got out of my own way and

634
00:28:11,460 --> 00:28:14,680
I did the emotional the physical the mental

635
00:28:14,680 --> 00:28:18,560
and the spiritual upgrades so yeah that that

636
00:28:18,560 --> 00:28:21,800
you've just mentioned there is really important that's

637
00:28:21,800 --> 00:28:25,320
that gratitude and that appreciation for what you've

638
00:28:25,320 --> 00:28:27,900
actually gone through so rather than going oh

639
00:28:27,900 --> 00:28:30,240
and moaning about things as you as you

640
00:28:30,240 --> 00:28:32,560
hear so many people do when they're in

641
00:28:32,560 --> 00:28:34,880
victim mode and they say oh well I've

642
00:28:34,880 --> 00:28:36,600
tried this and I've done that and it's

643
00:28:36,600 --> 00:28:38,140
not working and it's so and so so

644
00:28:38,140 --> 00:28:40,420
or what have you until you come back

645
00:28:40,420 --> 00:28:42,100
to the self until you start to take

646
00:28:42,100 --> 00:28:44,840
ownership for okay well what could I do

647
00:28:44,840 --> 00:28:46,760
differently and this isn't about what other people

648
00:28:46,760 --> 00:28:48,340
think that you should be doing or telling

649
00:28:48,340 --> 00:28:49,660
you what you should be doing because you

650
00:28:49,660 --> 00:28:51,280
know you they don't know you they might

651
00:28:51,280 --> 00:28:52,740
think that they know you and they might

652
00:28:52,740 --> 00:28:54,800
think they know what's best for you but

653
00:28:54,800 --> 00:28:56,800
trust me they don't and there's an awful

654
00:28:56,800 --> 00:28:58,880
lot of narcissists out there that think that

655
00:28:58,880 --> 00:29:00,440
they can tell you what to do as

656
00:29:00,440 --> 00:29:02,140
well and that's why I see it all

657
00:29:02,140 --> 00:29:05,280
with all the societal and patriarchal pressure because

658
00:29:05,280 --> 00:29:07,600
it's all very narcissistic led and they are

659
00:29:07,600 --> 00:29:09,520
very dominating people anyway so I'm going off

660
00:29:09,520 --> 00:29:11,400
the tangent we knew we'd do that but

661
00:29:11,400 --> 00:29:12,700
I wanted to come back to what you

662
00:29:12,700 --> 00:29:14,000
were saying with all of that bringing that

663
00:29:14,000 --> 00:29:15,880
back to where I was three years ago

664
00:29:15,880 --> 00:29:20,260
when I had to well now husband and

665
00:29:20,260 --> 00:29:22,720
I we were trying to sell our house

666
00:29:22,720 --> 00:29:24,420
I've met him six years ago and he

667
00:29:24,420 --> 00:29:25,720
was in the process of buying a house

668
00:29:25,720 --> 00:29:27,180
I'd got a house and we decided we

669
00:29:27,180 --> 00:29:29,780
wanted to relocate to the coast and I've

670
00:29:29,780 --> 00:29:32,660
just I won't go into the story but

671
00:29:32,660 --> 00:29:34,500
got a rental property in South Wales that

672
00:29:34,500 --> 00:29:35,720
I was trying to sell as well to

673
00:29:35,720 --> 00:29:38,320
try and just find the money to so

674
00:29:38,320 --> 00:29:40,460
that we could move and relocate so we've

675
00:29:40,460 --> 00:29:42,280
got all the all going on with the

676
00:29:42,280 --> 00:29:45,820
conveyancing and it's just going on forever and

677
00:29:45,820 --> 00:29:49,700
ever and ever and then I was having

678
00:29:49,700 --> 00:29:52,080
to put my recruitment business into voluntary liquidation

679
00:29:52,080 --> 00:29:53,720
because it hadn't survived Brexit COVID in the

680
00:29:53,720 --> 00:29:56,100
economy and then at the same time my

681
00:29:56,100 --> 00:29:58,620
son and I became estranged and we haven't

682
00:29:58,620 --> 00:30:00,000
spoken for three and a half years but

683
00:30:00,000 --> 00:30:01,380
all of that was happening at the same

684
00:30:01,380 --> 00:30:04,080
time so that's those tests those challenges I

685
00:30:04,080 --> 00:30:06,580
mean all of those things independently I'd be

686
00:30:06,580 --> 00:30:08,480
able to handle or I could have handled

687
00:30:08,480 --> 00:30:10,420
because I've always believed everything's working out wonderfully

688
00:30:10,420 --> 00:30:14,340
and taken that mantra but suddenly everything I

689
00:30:14,340 --> 00:30:16,380
felt like I was ambushed Louise everything at

690
00:30:16,380 --> 00:30:18,640
the same time it felt like every single

691
00:30:18,640 --> 00:30:20,560
exit point wasn't just blocked up it was

692
00:30:20,560 --> 00:30:22,960
cemented in it broke me it broke me

693
00:30:22,960 --> 00:30:24,880
and just broke me to the point I

694
00:30:24,880 --> 00:30:26,640
was banging my head against the garage door

695
00:30:26,640 --> 00:30:28,360
Gareth thought I was kicking it but I

696
00:30:28,360 --> 00:30:29,700
was banging my head against it and it

697
00:30:29,700 --> 00:30:32,060
was big bruise then now then he had

698
00:30:32,060 --> 00:30:33,260
to stop me banging my head against the

699
00:30:33,260 --> 00:30:34,680
corner of a door I felt I needed

700
00:30:34,680 --> 00:30:37,680
to be cracked open to be able to

701
00:30:37,680 --> 00:30:41,700
to surrender to what was unfolding for me

702
00:30:41,700 --> 00:30:44,400
but it get you're absolutely right Sarah so

703
00:30:44,400 --> 00:30:47,740
I'm sorry to hear that you physically did

704
00:30:47,740 --> 00:30:51,200
did that but you see you wouldn't think

705
00:30:51,200 --> 00:30:52,580
it of me would you you wouldn't think

706
00:30:52,580 --> 00:30:54,020
it would get you I mean I'm a

707
00:30:54,020 --> 00:30:58,660
strong person but that's that's how life has

708
00:30:58,660 --> 00:31:02,420
a habit of it takes you to extremes

709
00:31:02,420 --> 00:31:05,440
so you can look as you you needed

710
00:31:05,440 --> 00:31:08,760
you needed to move on didn't you I

711
00:31:08,760 --> 00:31:10,340
did and it was about letting go of

712
00:31:10,340 --> 00:31:12,580
the stuff that no longer served me and

713
00:31:12,580 --> 00:31:15,000
there was an awful amount of healing I

714
00:31:15,000 --> 00:31:16,420
mean and we can touch on this as

715
00:31:16,420 --> 00:31:18,740
well because I know you've you've explored lots

716
00:31:18,740 --> 00:31:20,880
of other things you know healing wise which

717
00:31:20,880 --> 00:31:22,960
we've touched upon when we've spoken before and

718
00:31:22,960 --> 00:31:24,160
in your book you know it's not one

719
00:31:24,160 --> 00:31:26,140
size fits all there are so many holistic

720
00:31:26,140 --> 00:31:28,660
methodologies out there and as you explore and

721
00:31:28,660 --> 00:31:30,960
you get digging further into the spiritual side

722
00:31:30,960 --> 00:31:32,040
of things I mean I've done all sorts

723
00:31:32,040 --> 00:31:35,520
from Reiki to EFT to shamanic stuff too

724
00:31:35,520 --> 00:31:37,180
and I've done lots of journey work and

725
00:31:37,180 --> 00:31:39,200
lots of you know I've done meditation I've

726
00:31:39,200 --> 00:31:42,400
done also all sorts of things on page

727
00:31:42,400 --> 00:31:46,200
126 is surrender surrender isn't about giving up

728
00:31:46,200 --> 00:31:48,400
it's about trusting the path your soul already

729
00:31:48,400 --> 00:31:51,200
knows and that's the truth of it isn't

730
00:31:51,200 --> 00:31:53,580
it because we are all here having a

731
00:31:53,580 --> 00:31:55,320
journey and the journey is about learning what

732
00:31:55,320 --> 00:31:57,160
we wanted I believe we choose the lifetime

733
00:31:57,160 --> 00:31:58,480
we come into to have the lessons we

734
00:31:58,480 --> 00:32:00,000
need to learn because we want to evolve

735
00:32:00,000 --> 00:32:03,300
and vibrate on a different sort of frequency

736
00:32:03,300 --> 00:32:05,720
if you like and the more aware you

737
00:32:05,720 --> 00:32:07,500
become the higher it becomes up and as

738
00:32:07,500 --> 00:32:09,860
you guys talked about the transition there will

739
00:32:09,860 --> 00:32:12,320
be people that fall out of your life

740
00:32:12,320 --> 00:32:14,020
but as they fall out of your life

741
00:32:14,440 --> 00:32:17,200
then other that gives a vacancy for other

742
00:32:17,200 --> 00:32:18,980
people to come in and other opportunities to

743
00:32:18,980 --> 00:32:22,280
come in and there's so much shifting could

744
00:32:22,280 --> 00:32:25,280
different parts components moving that is a beautiful

745
00:32:25,280 --> 00:32:27,280
way of we are not here to control

746
00:32:27,280 --> 00:32:30,480
all those different components on those different and

747
00:32:30,480 --> 00:32:32,840
that can be a big mistake of a

748
00:32:32,840 --> 00:32:36,520
lot of people and when you realise that

749
00:32:36,520 --> 00:32:38,380
actually perhaps if you've been the energy behind

750
00:32:38,380 --> 00:32:41,060
a relationship or you always feel you're the

751
00:32:41,060 --> 00:32:43,040
one that that does everything if you can

752
00:32:43,040 --> 00:32:44,580
sit back and really look at the truth

753
00:32:44,580 --> 00:32:47,260
of that relationship maybe that isn't somebody that

754
00:32:47,260 --> 00:32:49,200
is supposed to travel on with you but

755
00:32:49,200 --> 00:32:50,960
they're only travelling on with you until you've

756
00:32:50,960 --> 00:32:56,340
mastered the ability to say to yourself I'm

757
00:32:56,340 --> 00:32:59,200
done here type thing because not everybody is

758
00:32:59,200 --> 00:33:01,240
for every chapter seeing them as guides and

759
00:33:01,240 --> 00:33:03,660
teachers I mean I was in I was

760
00:33:03,660 --> 00:33:05,920
with my ex-husband for 20 20 years

761
00:33:05,920 --> 00:33:08,560
then had my 20s in my 40s it

762
00:33:08,560 --> 00:33:10,680
ended up dating ended up in another relationship

763
00:33:10,680 --> 00:33:12,840
it was very challenging and at the end

764
00:33:12,840 --> 00:33:14,420
of that when we split up when he

765
00:33:14,420 --> 00:33:16,520
left I thought I'd rather be single than

766
00:33:16,520 --> 00:33:18,440
in another challenging relationship but I was always

767
00:33:18,440 --> 00:33:21,820
appreciative and grateful for the lessons I learned

768
00:33:21,820 --> 00:33:24,700
because of his behaviour because of what I'd

769
00:33:24,700 --> 00:33:27,800
had to learn because of what I'd unlearned

770
00:33:27,800 --> 00:33:29,560
through all the years with my ex-husband

771
00:33:29,560 --> 00:33:33,060
because I'd been moved away from my family

772
00:33:33,060 --> 00:33:35,140
and my friends and without going into all

773
00:33:35,140 --> 00:33:36,560
the detail by the time I got divorced

774
00:33:36,560 --> 00:33:38,480
I hadn't been out for six years I

775
00:33:38,480 --> 00:33:40,680
didn't have a life so my life looks

776
00:33:40,680 --> 00:33:42,540
nothing like the life I was living was

777
00:33:42,540 --> 00:33:44,860
living 21 years ago and this is what

778
00:33:44,860 --> 00:33:47,240
I'm saying it's all you know echoes when

779
00:33:47,240 --> 00:33:48,540
I was reading your book there's so many

780
00:33:48,540 --> 00:33:51,260
sort of parallels there's differences obviously because we're

781
00:33:51,260 --> 00:33:54,800
different people but there's been so much shared

782
00:33:54,800 --> 00:33:57,960
learning through different experiences and when we embrace

783
00:33:57,960 --> 00:34:01,240
those and we as you said stop trying

784
00:34:01,240 --> 00:34:03,500
to control the outcome but feel into the

785
00:34:03,500 --> 00:34:06,600
energy of it all and become who we're

786
00:34:06,600 --> 00:34:08,620
meant to be or who we are already

787
00:34:08,620 --> 00:34:12,360
but we've we've dampened ourselves down to conform

788
00:34:12,360 --> 00:34:15,980
to fit in and be around people who

789
00:34:15,980 --> 00:34:19,139
get rankled or react badly if we be

790
00:34:19,139 --> 00:34:21,500
we are ourselves but we we as long

791
00:34:21,500 --> 00:34:24,280
as we're not doing outwardly anything to actively

792
00:34:24,280 --> 00:34:26,500
hurt anybody else or any other sentient being

793
00:34:26,500 --> 00:34:32,219
we are we are in full permission to

794
00:34:32,219 --> 00:34:35,199
be ourselves Shusul is my brand server as

795
00:34:35,199 --> 00:34:37,400
you know and I believe that when you

796
00:34:37,400 --> 00:34:41,440
can operate daily with love happiness and kindness

797
00:34:41,440 --> 00:34:46,580
from your true soul self life is I

798
00:34:46,580 --> 00:34:48,219
want to use word sparkles because I love

799
00:34:48,219 --> 00:34:50,980
the word sparkles it's sparkly because you see

800
00:34:50,980 --> 00:34:55,260
everything through a through a lens that wasn't

801
00:34:55,260 --> 00:34:57,440
available to you before but you can't do

802
00:34:57,440 --> 00:35:00,640
that you're still pretending you're fine when you're

803
00:35:00,640 --> 00:35:02,920
not you can maybe get me now and

804
00:35:02,920 --> 00:35:04,780
again but if you really clean the lenses

805
00:35:04,780 --> 00:35:06,820
of your of your life your glasses and

806
00:35:06,820 --> 00:35:09,880
you notice the diff you notice everything you

807
00:35:09,880 --> 00:35:11,260
notice that I'm looking out for that I've

808
00:35:11,260 --> 00:35:13,240
gotten so many flowers out there beautiful flowers

809
00:35:13,240 --> 00:35:16,500
you notice the cloud formation you just notice

810
00:35:16,500 --> 00:35:19,760
everything every day and you don't say oh

811
00:35:19,760 --> 00:35:22,720
it's raining again because actually you appreciate the

812
00:35:22,720 --> 00:35:26,480
rain I don't know I've not changed massively

813
00:35:26,480 --> 00:35:29,260
I just appreciate things that are much deeper

814
00:35:29,260 --> 00:35:32,620
level and I am grateful for every single

815
00:35:32,620 --> 00:35:38,620
day that I can shape relationship nature business

816
00:35:38,620 --> 00:35:41,660
opportunity everything I just appreciate at a deeper

817
00:35:41,660 --> 00:35:44,440
level beautiful because it gives back to me

818
00:35:44,440 --> 00:35:48,360
a feeling of excitement and joy and that's

819
00:35:48,360 --> 00:35:49,980
what we hear from as a human being

820
00:35:49,980 --> 00:35:53,740
I was too much a human doing and

821
00:35:53,740 --> 00:35:56,920
it nearly killed me my trust in my

822
00:35:56,920 --> 00:36:00,120
own knowing finding in the cancer on both

823
00:36:00,120 --> 00:36:05,280
occasions and pushing quietly quiet rule to be

824
00:36:05,280 --> 00:36:07,440
heard was always going to be part of

825
00:36:07,440 --> 00:36:10,060
my path so I could share in a

826
00:36:10,060 --> 00:36:13,960
book in a page turner apparently of why

827
00:36:13,960 --> 00:36:15,600
I don't want another woman to have to

828
00:36:15,600 --> 00:36:18,120
go through that no exactly and I absolutely

829
00:36:18,120 --> 00:36:20,200
agree with you I think everybody would benefit

830
00:36:20,200 --> 00:36:24,000
from reading your book I really do because

831
00:36:24,000 --> 00:36:26,960
it's it's honest it's true it's authentic and

832
00:36:26,960 --> 00:36:30,440
in this crazy world of AI and all

833
00:36:30,440 --> 00:36:34,340
this sort of sloppy salad stuff that's out

834
00:36:34,340 --> 00:36:35,820
there and different people trying to tell you

835
00:36:35,820 --> 00:36:38,080
to be this and all the control that

836
00:36:38,080 --> 00:36:39,400
it's all comes back to itself and if

837
00:36:39,400 --> 00:36:41,820
everybody starts to come back to themselves the

838
00:36:41,820 --> 00:36:44,880
collective can push against that sort of naught

839
00:36:44,880 --> 00:36:46,580
point whatever is one percent that are trying

840
00:36:46,580 --> 00:36:49,040
to control because they don't have permission over

841
00:36:49,040 --> 00:36:51,400
our free will nobody has permission over our

842
00:36:51,400 --> 00:36:53,940
free will and once you understand that and

843
00:36:53,940 --> 00:36:57,180
once you recognise that like you said you

844
00:36:57,180 --> 00:36:59,200
trust your instinct and your intuition which is

845
00:36:59,200 --> 00:37:02,160
your superpower you can stand firm in yourself

846
00:37:02,160 --> 00:37:04,340
you it's not to be pushed around it's

847
00:37:04,340 --> 00:37:06,460
not to be influenced it's you know we

848
00:37:06,460 --> 00:37:08,520
we can take things I mean I've been

849
00:37:08,520 --> 00:37:12,460
to a really fantastic business event this last

850
00:37:12,460 --> 00:37:14,500
week and there was so much there that

851
00:37:14,500 --> 00:37:15,820
I was able to take away but you

852
00:37:15,820 --> 00:37:17,860
know you don't take away everything from what

853
00:37:17,860 --> 00:37:20,500
somebody says there are certain things that resonate

854
00:37:20,500 --> 00:37:23,540
and it's recognising those bits and the resonator

855
00:37:23,540 --> 00:37:26,480
oh that's interesting I'm curious about that let's

856
00:37:26,480 --> 00:37:28,320
learn a little bit more let's press into

857
00:37:28,320 --> 00:37:31,040
that but it's not about trying to do

858
00:37:31,040 --> 00:37:33,280
everything all of the time it's distilling all

859
00:37:33,280 --> 00:37:35,720
of that because I did come back I'll

860
00:37:35,720 --> 00:37:37,260
be honest as well a little bit overwhelmed

861
00:37:37,260 --> 00:37:41,280
I'm going oh I still am a person

862
00:37:41,280 --> 00:37:43,340
who has far too many tabs open Louise

863
00:37:43,340 --> 00:37:49,580
situation weren't you because suddenly you were you

864
00:37:49,580 --> 00:37:52,140
were in this overwhelm and then you probably

865
00:37:52,140 --> 00:37:53,860
thought should I be doing this should I

866
00:37:53,860 --> 00:37:56,240
be doing it so you're really testing your

867
00:37:56,240 --> 00:37:59,180
own truth now with yourself is do I

868
00:37:59,180 --> 00:38:01,180
need that should I listen to that that

869
00:38:01,180 --> 00:38:04,440
didn't resonate so yeah you're being tested before

870
00:38:04,440 --> 00:38:08,000
you transition to what Sarah is moving to

871
00:38:08,000 --> 00:38:09,560
us I mean we are and then and

872
00:38:09,560 --> 00:38:11,280
if we are open and we are curious

873
00:38:11,280 --> 00:38:14,160
about that and we are exploring stuff things

874
00:38:14,160 --> 00:38:16,360
opportunities present themselves I mean if I if

875
00:38:16,360 --> 00:38:18,220
I go back to you know when we

876
00:38:18,220 --> 00:38:21,000
first met and it was sharing a photograph

877
00:38:21,000 --> 00:38:23,700
of me wearing latex in one of your

878
00:38:23,700 --> 00:38:26,640
Facebook group that you had just because there

879
00:38:26,640 --> 00:38:27,800
was an opportunity I think it was to

880
00:38:27,800 --> 00:38:29,600
do with bit purple and here we are

881
00:38:29,600 --> 00:38:32,420
anyway and because of that that prompted me

882
00:38:32,420 --> 00:38:34,380
then to open up a huge an Instagram

883
00:38:34,380 --> 00:38:36,700
account which has now got like 60,000

884
00:38:36,700 --> 00:38:39,520
followers or thereabouts and there's it open to

885
00:38:39,520 --> 00:38:42,000
so many more doors because I've stepped into

886
00:38:42,000 --> 00:38:43,580
the truth of who I am it's somebody

887
00:38:43,580 --> 00:38:46,180
who likes shiny things as well as glittery

888
00:38:46,180 --> 00:38:50,660
things and silvery imagine if you hadn't stepped

889
00:38:50,660 --> 00:38:52,700
into that and done that first photograph which

890
00:38:52,700 --> 00:38:53,900
was a big thing at the time I

891
00:38:53,900 --> 00:38:57,200
do remember you you wouldn't be your true

892
00:38:57,200 --> 00:38:59,260
self and you would be half showing up

893
00:38:59,260 --> 00:39:03,640
as Sarah and half hiding Lucy latex yeah

894
00:39:03,640 --> 00:39:06,940
be yourself always be yourself because everyone else

895
00:39:06,940 --> 00:39:09,840
is taken and this book through the raw

896
00:39:09,840 --> 00:39:12,620
experiences of honesty of parts of my life

897
00:39:12,620 --> 00:39:14,620
it's not by all means the whole of

898
00:39:14,620 --> 00:39:16,900
my life live a friend did say I

899
00:39:16,900 --> 00:39:18,380
was surprised you didn't put a B and

900
00:39:18,380 --> 00:39:20,160
C and I'm like how long a book

901
00:39:20,160 --> 00:39:24,620
was I supposed to write because it's not

902
00:39:24,620 --> 00:39:28,160
full you know a full life history of

903
00:39:28,160 --> 00:39:34,380
Louise budget but you'll see that I'm happy

904
00:39:34,380 --> 00:39:35,860
to share them because I do think the

905
00:39:35,860 --> 00:39:38,620
learnings behind each and everything that I share

906
00:39:38,620 --> 00:39:42,440
are universal because truth is universal Sarah it's

907
00:39:42,440 --> 00:39:45,420
nothing something I've just come up with it's

908
00:39:45,420 --> 00:39:49,180
it's runs through absolutely everything and then across

909
00:39:49,180 --> 00:39:50,980
the globe and I really would love this

910
00:39:50,980 --> 00:39:54,120
book to become a timeless book that people

911
00:39:54,120 --> 00:39:55,780
will go back to and I'll think do

912
00:39:55,780 --> 00:39:57,100
you know I really feel I've gone a

913
00:39:57,100 --> 00:39:58,560
little bit off kilter I might just get

914
00:39:58,560 --> 00:40:00,000
that book up because there are some exercises

915
00:40:00,000 --> 00:40:04,560
and after each part there are reflective exercises

916
00:40:04,560 --> 00:40:07,360
because I'm not one for suddenly putting you

917
00:40:07,360 --> 00:40:08,920
on a mini course at the end of

918
00:40:08,920 --> 00:40:11,920
a flowing chapter or a flowing these are

919
00:40:11,920 --> 00:40:14,000
just opportunities for you to drop into yourself

920
00:40:14,000 --> 00:40:17,020
think well while you're with me on the

921
00:40:17,020 --> 00:40:20,120
journey or how does that relate and you

922
00:40:20,120 --> 00:40:21,700
can also just use it and divinate as

923
00:40:21,700 --> 00:40:24,040
well you can just literally open open the

924
00:40:24,040 --> 00:40:26,220
book and and and find a page I

925
00:40:26,220 --> 00:40:28,380
mean the first thing that I I open

926
00:40:28,380 --> 00:40:30,160
when I went so I was just reflecting

927
00:40:30,160 --> 00:40:32,220
back through a few things we are wise

928
00:40:32,220 --> 00:40:34,520
women we have always been as souls we

929
00:40:34,520 --> 00:40:36,840
carry an ancient connection to our bodies a

930
00:40:36,840 --> 00:40:40,360
connection that is both powerful and mysterious yet

931
00:40:40,360 --> 00:40:42,660
to be deciphered by science while science has

932
00:40:42,660 --> 00:40:45,040
its place patients should never dismiss their powerful

933
00:40:45,040 --> 00:40:47,980
intuition always ensure it is switched on and

934
00:40:47,980 --> 00:40:50,780
listened to and that was the first thing

935
00:40:50,780 --> 00:40:52,400
when I I used the book this morning

936
00:40:52,400 --> 00:40:54,860
to divinate and I went that is that

937
00:40:54,860 --> 00:40:59,160
is so powerful so this book this fabulous

938
00:40:59,160 --> 00:41:02,340
book by Louise which I'm going to get

939
00:41:02,340 --> 00:41:03,940
Gareth to read as well it's been on

940
00:41:03,940 --> 00:41:05,400
his pile I had to pull it away

941
00:41:05,400 --> 00:41:06,840
from his pile this morning I think men

942
00:41:06,840 --> 00:41:08,500
would be interested in reading it as well

943
00:41:08,500 --> 00:41:10,800
if I could just share at the very

944
00:41:10,800 --> 00:41:13,760
last minute it was for every soul who

945
00:41:13,760 --> 00:41:17,420
knows there's more to their story and marketing

946
00:41:17,420 --> 00:41:20,360
perspective I changed it to woman maybe a

947
00:41:20,360 --> 00:41:24,060
second copy print run will be sold because

948
00:41:24,060 --> 00:41:25,820
I don't think it is there are men

949
00:41:25,820 --> 00:41:28,460
reading it my husband went up for retirement

950
00:41:28,460 --> 00:41:30,680
do in London and he said I couldn't

951
00:41:30,680 --> 00:41:31,980
believe it so so came up to me

952
00:41:31,980 --> 00:41:33,720
I've read your wife's book it's amazing and

953
00:41:33,720 --> 00:41:35,820
he's like a 65 year old guy he

954
00:41:35,820 --> 00:41:39,280
said it was really really enjoyed it there

955
00:41:39,280 --> 00:41:40,800
you go and on that note you can

956
00:41:40,800 --> 00:41:43,480
buy it on Amazon however Louise is offering

957
00:41:43,480 --> 00:41:47,060
it to anybody listening to this harnessing happiness

958
00:41:47,060 --> 00:41:54,360
web harnessing happiness podcast via her website authenticity

959
00:41:54,360 --> 00:41:57,640
votes it's not AI here you know if

960
00:41:57,640 --> 00:42:00,140
you go to Louise's website which is www

961
00:42:00,140 --> 00:42:04,640
.louisebudgeon.com that's budging B-U-D-G

962
00:42:04,640 --> 00:42:08,100
-E-N so that's dot com and if

963
00:42:08,100 --> 00:42:10,320
you order the book through there you can

964
00:42:10,320 --> 00:42:11,900
have a signed copy and if you put

965
00:42:11,900 --> 00:42:16,140
in HH26 you'll get 10% discount and

966
00:42:16,140 --> 00:42:17,820
it will be signed and sent to you

967
00:42:17,820 --> 00:42:19,100
and I'm sure it will be in a

968
00:42:19,100 --> 00:42:24,140
lovely packaging knowing Louise oh Louise thank you

969
00:42:24,140 --> 00:42:27,740
thank you thank you so so much for

970
00:42:27,740 --> 00:42:29,660
joining me as I said right at the

971
00:42:29,660 --> 00:42:31,600
outset it's always a pleasure spending time with

972
00:42:31,600 --> 00:42:33,440
you I always feel like I've been bathed

973
00:42:33,440 --> 00:42:36,940
in loveliness I just love our conversations they

974
00:42:36,940 --> 00:42:38,500
could go on for hours but I'm very

975
00:42:38,500 --> 00:42:41,360
mindful that we need to to sign off

976
00:42:41,360 --> 00:42:43,240
so is there any one last thing that

977
00:42:43,240 --> 00:42:45,300
you would like to share or say to

978
00:42:45,300 --> 00:42:47,840
the listeners the viewers aside from obviously heading

979
00:42:47,840 --> 00:42:49,420
to your website and buying the book or

980
00:42:49,420 --> 00:42:51,040
nipping on to Amazon and buying it too

981
00:42:51,040 --> 00:42:53,440
what would you like to say in conclusion

982
00:42:53,440 --> 00:42:57,920
you are a beautiful unique human being don't

983
00:42:57,920 --> 00:43:01,000
forget that please if you realise you're doing

984
00:43:01,000 --> 00:43:04,160
too much take time for you and find

985
00:43:04,160 --> 00:43:07,940
those five minutes to pause and be with

986
00:43:07,940 --> 00:43:10,580
yourself because that's where your magic lies and

987
00:43:10,580 --> 00:43:12,940
thank you all for listening to this harnessing

988
00:43:12,940 --> 00:43:15,800
happiness podcast with myself Sarah J Naylor please

989
00:43:15,800 --> 00:43:18,200
do hit subscribe to make sure that you

990
00:43:18,200 --> 00:43:20,480
get notified of all the new episodes that

991
00:43:20,480 --> 00:43:23,620
are recorded and land in your inbox which

992
00:43:23,620 --> 00:43:25,700
on whichever platform you choose to listen to

993
00:43:25,700 --> 00:43:28,060
or on YouTube because here it is on

994
00:43:28,060 --> 00:43:30,640
YouTube in video to take care until next