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Hello and welcome to the Designed as You podcast where we explore the depths of your being and how to navigate this beautiful but wild life through the lens of human design.
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I'm your host Hilary, a human design teacher and intuitive, and I'm here to help you evolve into the person you came here to be.
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Let's dive in.
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Hello, my loves.
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Welcome back to the podcast.
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I have just returned from our rest assured retreat at Somer Byron Day, and it was such a beautiful four days.
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It still never ceases to amaze me and always blows my mind what can happen when women come together like that.
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We learn, we connect, we rest, we play, we create, we heal.
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It's so beautiful.
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It honestly actually makes me feel a little bit emotional.
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And them all leaving, so bright, so light.
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And I'm really proud of these women.
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They move through some big stuff.
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Like in one of the breathwork sessions, it was powerful.
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It was probably one of the biggest breathwork sessions I've held.
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And you know, it was just a testament to them of how deep and how far they could go.
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And then as well, just the joy, the laughter, the fun that was had.
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I don't think I've laughed like that in so long.
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We had this beautiful evening under the stars, then a fire, and it was just giggles, giggles all night.
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So so grateful for these women, so grateful that they said yes to themselves and that they were so open to learn, invest, and grow in themselves.
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And today we have a very special guest for you.
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His name is Ryan Hubbard.
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He is a founder of Cool to Be Conscious.
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He's a father, a partner, an entrepreneur, a teacher, and also a breath work facilitator.
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So I asked Ryan on, because he was actually speaking of community and speaking of connection, when I returned back from Australia after living overseas for a couple of years, and when I moved overseas, I really, you know, did dive into my own spiritual journey, my own self-development.
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It was probably where I had my most biggest shifts and changes.
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And there was this, I wouldn't say fear, but I would say apprehension returning back to Australia.
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And at first, I thought I was only returning back just to visit my family and I was going to go back overseas because I really didn't feel or I wasn't aware yet of this conscious community that was in Australia.
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When I left, I was not in that community.
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And I felt like I was the only one moving through what I was moving through.
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So I went traveling and I went and moved to Berlin, I moved to Spain, I moved to Mexico, I moved around a lot, Costa Rica.
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And over those few years, I'm so grateful I did that time.
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At the same time, my soul was calling me to come home, to come back to Australia.
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I felt such a strong calling home because I really felt like I wanted to bring these things that I was learning, human design, back to Australia because it was still very new here in Australia.
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I actually didn't know anyone that was practicing human design in Australia.
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And I felt like I really feel called to go home.
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I miss my family, I miss people here, I miss the weather, I miss the lifestyle.
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And when I returned home, it felt like such a strong homecoming of like, oh, this is where I'm meant to be.
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But when I did return, I saw Australia with new eyes and I felt so connected and in awe of how incredible this country is.
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And I feel like a lot of us feel that we might go away from our home place and then feel called to come back and see it so differently.
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It might not be your forever place, but you can see it with a different lens and a different appreciation now.
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And when I returned, I was really craving this community.
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And I remember writing it on a list and I shared this story to Ryan where I almost felt like I manifested my connection with Call to Be Conscious because I was really craving meeting new conscious people or people that were interested in similar things that I was interested in, had similar language.
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You know, we just kind of crave to feel a belonging or community.
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And so, long story short, I think it popped up maybe on my Instagram, or maybe I heard them on a podcast or something.
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I can't remember exactly where I found them, but that's usually how it happens.
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The universe puts you in there or puts them in your line of awareness when you're ready for it or when you're open and your rouse system is connecting to it, can find it, can notice it.
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And it was even before I left.
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There, of course, there was a conscious community here in Australia, but I just was not connected to it.
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I didn't see it.
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I wasn't aware of it because I wasn't looking for it, or I wasn't open to it.
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So I remember being like, okay, I'm I was at the Gold Coast and I saw that they had one in Burley at 6 a.m.
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or something.
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And I remember like being quite nervous, and it was like the first week I had returned back to Australia, and I was like, okay, I'll go to this event.
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And they do big breathwork events and ice baths and meditation and connection at the beach.
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And I remember going there, and it was still at this point quite small groups.
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It's beautiful to watch how much cool to be conscious this movement has grown.
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So I went there and yeah, it was such a beautiful event, and it was such a beautiful experience.
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And the people I met was so beautiful.
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I remember just being like, wow, this is amazing on the beach doing breath work.
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We all went for a swim afterward.
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I met incredible people as well.
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It was beautiful, like conscious men.
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I remember being like, wow, there's like men here are talking about this.
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Wherever I'd gone, there was often just women.
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And then I met this beautiful woman and we became very close.
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And I remember we were both running late, actually.
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We both couldn't get a car park.
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And so because we were late, we got joined together in the connection part, and we really got chatting, really hit it off, and we then got breakfast together afterwards.
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And it was so beautiful.
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She said to me, You know, you manifested me, right?
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I was like, Yes, I actually did.
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She intuited it.
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She was like, Yeah, I'm never late to this, I'm never get don't get apart.
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We were meant to talk together, and yeah, she's just a beautiful soul sister.
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And so in that moment, these type of movements or businesses, it's so beautiful, like how the byproduct is of who comes together.
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And I really saw this at the retreat.
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One of the things I'm most proud of in my work is the people I draw in, the people I attract.
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And it's a common reflection I get from my clients and from the guests on retreat that, you know, it's beautiful, the people you attract.
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They've always been so beautiful, they've always connected the friendships that have been made.
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I had ones that they met up in Bali.
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I had ones now that they were all like, especially just in this retreat, they were all very close and instantly almost.
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It was just incredible to witness.
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And to be able to speak so deeply, skip all the small talk, be able to speak about things that maybe they were shameful about or that they were excited about that they felt like they couldn't share with the people around them.
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So this is a message to you to really cultivate the community if you're craving it.
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Also, as well, it's been such a beautiful byproduct of me just following my passion and following the things I enjoy that and following my intuition.
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My intuition guided me to that beach that day to do breath work and to be in that space, you know, to be in environments like that, it naturally will inspire you.
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It will naturally bring out creativity and that soul connection with people.
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So that was an experience that I had, and I really was grateful for Ryan for having created that space.
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And so whenever we have a desire, there's always that reciprocal energy, that outward ability to receive for your desire.
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So be open for what you're desiring and to create aligned action towards that.
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So if you're feeling a call for community or transformation or to just be around people with similar values, yeah, there's plenty of them.
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They are everywhere.
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And if not, go online, go into a community space.
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It's so important.
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We are wired for connection.
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Okay, let's go back to the conversation with Ryan.
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As I said, he created cool to be conscious.
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I think they're having like 3,000 people or something on a beach at one time, doing ice buffs and everything.
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Ryan's main modality is breath work.
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You know, your ability to just bypass the conscious mind and go to the subconscious, go to the true feeling.
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It's a powerful tool.
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I love breath work.
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I'm also a practitioner in breath work.
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I love to use it in combination with human design because human design is a lot about the conscious awareness, your conscious mind getting on board with what your body already knows and understanding your energetic aura and what you're here to give and do.
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But it's very mind-heady.
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Yes, we're connecting to the body, but I find that breath work bypasses all of that, goes straight into the body, is able to process, is able to give you answers that you're seeking.
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It's able to move the energy.
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You know, any emotion is energy emotion, so it's able to move that energy so it's no longer festering in there or no longer creating subconscious limiting beliefs or perpetuating or storing traumas.
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You know, this is Ryan's work that he does and trains practitioners as well in birth work.
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So enjoy this one.
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Thank you so much, Ryan, for coming on the show.
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I'll put all Ryan's links below, and thank you so much.
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Okay, well, welcome, welcome to the podcast.
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I have a very exciting guest here with me today.
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His name is Ryan Hubbard.
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He is the founder of Cool to Be Conscious.
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He is a teacher, a father, a partner, and a Kiwi.
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So I'm very excited to be chatting with you today.
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And thank you for joining me.
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Pleasure is mine.
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Um, I'm really looking forward to this conversation.
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Yeah, I first discovered Cool to Be Conscious when I actually returned to Australia after living overseas for a couple of years.
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And I remember it was a big thing in my I guess it was a manifestation that I wanted to have a conscious community when I returned.
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I definitely had a big spiritual journey once I left.
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And I always felt like it was lacking a little bit in Australia, and I was almost afraid to come back to Australia, even though my heart was so calling to come home.
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And I came to one of your events and as well the women that I met there and the men, but especially there was a few women that I'm still very close with today.
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And I feel like in such a world where we're just craving connection and community, is this, you know, is this your mission behind call to be conscious?
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I would just love to hear a bit more about what you're creating.
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Yeah, no, firstly, thanks for sharing that.
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And was it a no sir?
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No, it was in Gold Coast.
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Oh, was it?
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Yeah, when I first returned, I lived on the Gold Coast.
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Oh, amazing.
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Yeah, incredible.
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Yeah, no, for sure.
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Like the word connection is is really what encapsulates what the whole movement is about.
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And it's not just connection with other people, it's connection with yourself and remembering what that is.
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You know, like when I first started my journey of inquiring within a little bit more and and exploring my internal body, it was really scary and I felt almost alienated and different and separate from the friends that I was hanging out with.
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And then when values and things started to mismatch and there wasn't an alignment there, it became really lonely.
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Yeah.
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And I was like, where do I go?
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And who do I hang out with to talk about the stuff that I'm experiencing?
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And the only place or the only community that I could seek and see was the more so I'd say spiritually inclined and um immersed, separate from society.
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They were like very much living in community bush huts and stuff like that.
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And for me that was like really intimidating.
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You know, I come from I'd say a very conservative family, lived on a farm in New Zealand, and I couldn't see myself doing that or being what they were.
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And it was it for me brought up a lot of insecurity.
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Do I have to like leave my flat and buy a van and move into a bush community?
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So it was really nerve-wracking of what was next and what chapter of my life was next.
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So I wanted to create a community that brought in or invited people into that was not so separate from my normal.
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So I was like, how can I make this really digestible and approachable and somewhat attractive for people?
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Because there was such a a gap in space in between within spirituality and science.
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So I wanted to create a middle point.
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And that's really been the mission.
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It's like, how can I make this fun, cool, and digestible for the masses?
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And that's been the whole mission since I started essentially.
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Like, how can I create something that my old self would be interested in doing?
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The guy that was really judgmental, really anxious, very insecure and focused on drinking and alcohol culture in New Zealand.
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How can I get him?
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How can I catch that guy you know that I was?
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How can I make something that had a bit of spice to it and looked unique and looked fun and inviting?
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How can I get that guy?
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So that's been the whole, I would say, uh, mission is creating that and creating it from a place of my own experience and sharing from a place of knowing and embodiment in myself.
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And that's all I've really done.
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And since then it's been just a a really I'd say humbling journey and pretty profound journey, like watching the the manifestation of that vision or that that drive and that purpose to create that.
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And I didn't have intention or belief that it would be something that it is right now.
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You know, it started off with five friends and it just accentuated and here we are now, you know.
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3,000 people down on the wild.
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Yeah.
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But you can see that just like yourself, people are craving connection.
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Yeah.
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We live in such a digitally overpowered or overruled society where we're so focused on connecting online, growing our followers, having all of the engagement on comments and posts, and we're somewhat so we're at the mercy of that, you know.
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And I'm trying to create a positive spin with the online and social media world, but also bring people back to what we deeply crave at our core, which is to feel connected to people in the physical form.
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I feel we get spikes and false sense of that through our phones, but like nothing and come close to what we experience in person at these community events and people really feel the essence of what community is about.
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So yeah, I guess it's a quick intro into what our human need, it's our human not it beyond survival, but it's just we've almost kind of belittled that genuine essential trait as a human.
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And what I was loving, even just what you were sharing about, you know, speaking to the person that may not resonate fully with the hippie, and you know, and that was a big experience for me as well of okay, so I'm not feeling connected with where I am now, but there that feels so far away, and that also doesn't feel connected.
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So where is this middle point?
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And I feel like a lot of people can be in this almost limbo or this in-between of okay, well, I don't fit here anymore.
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This doesn't feel good, but this feels too out of realms, or it goes so against my conditioning or goes so against, you know, my belief system.
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And so what I do love what you were just sharing, it's like kind of coming to where people are at, and then in itself, that is also a beautiful space.
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Like it's not actually an in-between.
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This is a beautiful space.
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It doesn't have to be so polarizing different sides, and you don't need to go and be a Himalayan the monk, but you also can be aware of how your actions are affecting other people, you know?
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So I love how that I really feel that in your movement because it's made it approachable, as you said, but also very welcoming.
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Yeah.
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So I would love for you to please share as well what has been some of those experiences, either even just the Ryan that sits before me today, when you're looking back, is there any big experiences or big life moments that attribute to who you are now?
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Before, before the moment?
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I feel let's go one before, one after.
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Okay, okay, I like it.
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I'd say what first pops to mind with the before would be man, there's actually so many little moments, but I'd say, you know, the catalyst to the beginning of my journey would be a big one.
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You know, the moment that I realized I wasn't okay and that has changed the trajectory of my life.
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You know, I was in a crossroads there when I realized that when I first experienced one of the severest panic attacks that I'd experienced to the point where I had tetanine caused by temporary respiratory alkalosis in the blood, which is when you experience cramping in the hands from hyperventilating.
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And I experienced that and I could my hands were blue, apparently my face went blue, my lips went purp went purple.
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So in a in a very hypoxic state, so low oxygen levels in the in the blood and to the point where you know nearly nearly losing consciousness.
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In that moment, I I realized how not okay I was.
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I was like, there is something severely wrong with my my my body shouldn't be doing this and what it's doing right now, you know.
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And I always tried to oversee everything and not look into the things that were happening to my body.
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I was very disrespectful and neglectful to how my body was trying to talk and communicate with me for a really long time.
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And in that moment, I was like, oh no, I've got to start listening to this thing.
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Yeah, you know, I can't not, I can't not uh ignore this one.
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And it was big.
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I was in in front of my when when it happened, I was next to my best friend at the time, and it was just me and him, and we were on our way back from a music festival like three days after the festival, and clearly my body was run down and not keeping up with what I was putting it through.
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And I was on the ground in a car park, he'd pulled over.
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The panic attack was starting to come on whilst we were still moving in the van, and I started getting clammy in my hands, I started fidgeting, and I was just like, What am I doing?
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Why am I moving so much?
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And I was like, Oh my god, and I was like tap toe tapping, like, can you pull over?
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I need some fresh air.
00:17:44.720 --> 00:17:54.319
And by the time he pulled over, I was like paralyzed on the ground, hyperventilating, fully cramped up, turning blue, and we were under this, like it was actually like a really beautiful moment.
00:17:54.400 --> 00:17:56.000
I was under this huge tree.
00:17:56.240 --> 00:18:07.920
All I can remember seeing when I came out of this panic attack was the colours and the tree like kind of blowing in the wind, was so present, and then my best mate who was there just holding my hand.
00:18:08.319 --> 00:18:20.960
And in that moment I recognized how not okay I was, but I also gave myself permission to be capital V vulnerable, and I hadn't been vulnerable for since I could remember, and I just had tears flowing down my face.
00:18:21.440 --> 00:18:26.880
One, because I thought I was dying, I thought I was gone, and I thought in that moment this is it, um, you know, this is my life.
00:18:27.759 --> 00:18:37.839
And two, I had no other choice, you know, like the emotion was so prevalent and pressing on my system, I had to let it come through and the tears just started flowing like a river.
00:18:38.079 --> 00:18:54.480
And for my best mate, it was new, you know, he'd never seen me in that state before, and it was probably really uncomfortable for him to watch me, you know, someone that was usually you know the guy that was fun and stalwick and like and you know, strong and tough on the outside, tough shell.
00:18:54.799 --> 00:18:58.400
And yeah, that I think that for me was a huge catalyst for the beginning.
00:18:58.480 --> 00:18:59.839
I realized that something had to change.
00:18:59.920 --> 00:19:06.880
And that vulnerability came a lot of confronting sensations and emotions and our reflections as well.
00:19:06.960 --> 00:19:09.359
You know, I had the what do you do now?
00:19:09.440 --> 00:19:11.519
Yeah feelings, and was that too much?
00:19:11.680 --> 00:19:13.759
And is your best friend gonna like you now?
00:19:13.920 --> 00:19:15.839
And is he gonna tell people about this?
00:19:15.920 --> 00:19:18.480
And what are people gonna think about this when they hear?
00:19:18.640 --> 00:19:25.839
I was a bit of somewhat um social media influencer back then, you know, coming off the back of a reality TV show in New Zealand.
00:19:26.160 --> 00:19:26.319
Okay.
00:19:26.480 --> 00:19:30.400
I think that led to a lot of like social anxiety and pressure that I put on myself as well.
00:19:30.640 --> 00:19:32.960
So I was really scared that people were gonna find out.
00:19:33.119 --> 00:19:36.559
So in that moment was such like the polarity in it was crazy.
00:19:36.640 --> 00:19:40.720
I was like, I feel so free, and I feel like this is the beginning of m the new me.
00:19:40.880 --> 00:19:45.279
And also I was like, I'm so scared to be this vision of me, I don't really want to be here.
00:19:45.519 --> 00:19:49.359
So like the voices were so loud, I was like, hey, Brian, you're doing amazing.
00:19:49.440 --> 00:19:52.640
It's time to let go and become this person that you're meant to.
00:19:52.720 --> 00:19:57.279
And on the other end, it was like, no, you can't be in this world anymore because this is too scary.
00:19:57.359 --> 00:20:00.240
Like that ego essence of me was like, No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
00:20:00.480 --> 00:20:05.440
Yeah, the shame was like no no no no embarrassment for being vulnerable, for crying, having a panic attack.
00:20:05.680 --> 00:20:16.640
So it was scary, like I was being conflicted with these two voices, and essentially it led me to going back to my mum, yeah, you know, the great feminine in in my world.
00:20:16.720 --> 00:20:22.480
And so I was confused, I didn't know where to go, I didn't know how to seek help, I didn't know where to start, so went back to my mum.
00:20:22.640 --> 00:20:32.000
So I guess that was a a big pivotal moment in the journey that changed everything and the trajectory of who I was becoming and how my life panned out from there.
00:20:32.240 --> 00:20:36.480
It's amazing those moments where it's you can't, as we said, you can't ignore it anymore.
00:20:36.640 --> 00:20:38.319
Your body is screaming at you.
00:20:38.480 --> 00:20:52.640
I also had the panic attack experience as well, and it's almost this confrontation of I can't keep running away from myself, and it's just so in your body either when you're in a panic attack, even though you're so much going on, you can't be anywhere else.
00:20:53.279 --> 00:21:04.000
And um, you know, sadly I think it's a lot of people's experience that either they'll have that low-lying anxiety all the time, or they'll always be in that like that fear and the shame.
00:21:04.240 --> 00:21:05.759
So, yeah, thank you for sharing.
00:21:06.000 --> 00:21:06.960
No, thanks for listening.
00:21:07.359 --> 00:21:12.000
It's and as you mentioned, I I feel a lot of people experience these moments of of panic.
00:21:12.160 --> 00:21:23.279
And, you know, now with what I teach in terms of breath work and breathing, it's literally uh a great analogy or sign that you are breathing in a really dysfunctional manner in a way.
00:21:23.440 --> 00:21:30.640
And it's you know, it's funny to reflect now on the fact that what started my breathwork journey was hyperventilating and not having any breath.
00:21:30.720 --> 00:21:35.839
And now, you know, I have lots of breath and I have lots of access to the oxygen in the air that's here.
00:21:35.920 --> 00:21:38.640
I'm now hypoventilating, so breathing a lot less.
00:21:38.960 --> 00:21:40.160
So it's an interesting journey.
00:21:40.720 --> 00:21:52.240
Now, the to answer the second phase of that question, I feel a big shift was when I had um quite an esoteric energetic experience that made me believe I was having a heart attack.
00:21:53.039 --> 00:22:05.680
And it was so real and so cathartic and somatic that again it had been The same frame or state of being where I was when I was having the panic attack, I thought that that my life was over.
00:22:06.000 --> 00:22:08.960
And it shifted me in a way that I I struggled to articulate.
00:22:09.279 --> 00:22:19.839
But what I got from that experience the most was one, I need to mend every relationship and connection in my life that has untouched strings or there may be a negative charge towards.
00:22:20.400 --> 00:22:22.799
Because when I came back, I thought I was gone.
00:22:23.039 --> 00:22:24.400
And it was so odd.
00:22:24.640 --> 00:22:30.640
The first thing I thought of was like, I don't want anyone to feel negatively towards me when I die.
00:22:30.880 --> 00:22:42.000
And then that was it was so alive, and I was like, I need to do everything I can to mend any connection that I've had from school, from high school, through my early 20s.
00:22:42.079 --> 00:22:48.880
Like any woman I've mistreated, any men that I've mistreated, I need to reconnect with them and make sure that there's no negative charge.
00:22:49.119 --> 00:22:51.680
I need to have closure there with all of those connections.
00:22:51.759 --> 00:22:52.400
It was crazy.
00:22:52.480 --> 00:23:00.160
And I basically set out to that was my work to go and mend all of those potential connections that there was a negative charge towards.
00:23:00.319 --> 00:23:02.880
So I was like reaching out to girls that I dated or seen.
00:23:02.960 --> 00:23:05.440
I was like, hey, I just want to make sure that I didn't to mistreat you.
00:23:05.519 --> 00:23:06.720
And if I did, I'm so sorry.
00:23:06.799 --> 00:23:12.880
And I knew that I had to, like the old woman that I'd mistreated, and I was like, hey, look, I'm so sorry for the way that I treated you, you don't deserve that.
00:23:13.119 --> 00:23:14.000
And that was my work.
00:23:14.079 --> 00:23:15.759
I set out to just mend all of that.
00:23:15.920 --> 00:23:26.559
And it gave me such ease, like in my body, I realized that I was holding on to so much guilt within those dynamics and interactions that had taken place.
00:23:26.720 --> 00:23:27.519
And it was crazy.
00:23:27.759 --> 00:23:31.839
Even if it was just like a 10-second interaction and it was bad for me, like I had to mend it.
00:23:31.920 --> 00:23:32.240
Yeah.
00:23:32.559 --> 00:23:33.759
And I don't know.
00:23:33.839 --> 00:23:48.319
It it really changed the way that I I now interact with the world and the way that I I guess could heal the old aspects of me that were still living in the past that I was carrying along with me.
00:23:48.480 --> 00:23:50.079
Like I was still holding on to that guilt.
00:23:50.240 --> 00:23:57.200
Whether I consciously knew it or not, my body and subconscious were still holding on to a lot of the guilt that I had for those relationships.
00:23:57.519 --> 00:24:06.799
So that was a pivotal moment, and I feel it's changed the way that I now show up within the way that I teach and the way that I engage with people.
00:24:07.039 --> 00:24:22.160
I just I I need to make sure that I'm not leaving people in this feeling of resentment or anger or discomfort towards me because whether we know it or not, our body is receiving that energy and that like cord, that energetic cord between them to us.
00:24:22.319 --> 00:24:22.960
And I don't know.
00:24:23.119 --> 00:24:39.119
It was like when I thought I was dying and I was transitioning into the next phase of my existence, it was like I don't know whether the weight was too heavy on me or whether the essence of me, the spirit or the soul of me, whatever words you want to use, it knew that there was like still baggage there that I needed to clear out.
00:24:39.279 --> 00:24:41.279
It was crazy, it was really bizarre.
00:24:41.519 --> 00:24:51.839
But that was one of the biggest things that came through from that moment, and also what came through was the fact that I needed to surrender to the love that my partner was trying to share with me.
00:24:52.240 --> 00:25:01.599
There was a part of me that was still really nervous to receive her love and scared to be hurt, scared to to lose the love that was available and ready for me.
00:25:01.759 --> 00:25:03.119
And that was big.
00:25:03.200 --> 00:25:08.079
I was like, man, I've been with her for I'd had had been with her for over two and a half years.
00:25:08.240 --> 00:25:20.400
And in that moment when I came back from that experience, I was like, I've blocked her out, like in a way where I thought I was open, there was still part of me that was so closed off to going deeper into her love and really receiving it.
00:25:20.480 --> 00:25:25.680
So I was like, man, I was really avoiding to receive her fully.
00:25:25.839 --> 00:25:27.119
So that was big.
00:25:27.279 --> 00:25:29.519
So I guess those two beautiful.
00:25:29.759 --> 00:25:35.119
What I'm hearing as well, it's just like you really feeling called in your integrity and your intention.
00:25:35.200 --> 00:25:39.599
It sounds like very intentional now of how you're connecting, who you're connecting with.
00:25:39.759 --> 00:25:42.880
Do you feel like there's it now a pressure there around that?
00:25:43.279 --> 00:25:48.720
In a way of because inevitably people are gonna have or misunderstand you.
00:25:48.880 --> 00:25:53.680
Inevitably, they are, you're gonna inevitably let people down, or you can't make everyone happy.
00:25:53.839 --> 00:25:55.039
Do you ever feel pressure around that?
00:25:55.200 --> 00:25:57.200
Especially as a man, I can imagine, would be for sure.
00:25:57.359 --> 00:25:57.519
Yeah.
00:25:57.759 --> 00:26:26.400
Yeah, I guess there's the difference that I'm that I'd like to speak into is you know, like I would if I'm conscious and aware of myself, and I am in in most moments, I'm not going to partake in the exchange that I used to, and I would have let myself partake in, whether that's confrontation when I lose control over the energy in my body and I'll shout at somebody, or a classic example was that people would cut me off in traffic, I'd be the guy that'd be like, Oh, what are you doing, mate?
00:26:26.480 --> 00:26:28.319
And I'd engage in that energy.
00:26:28.559 --> 00:26:37.440
Whereas now I have the ability to choose in those moments how I'm gonna interact and how I'm gonna respond in those moments of and I'd say confrontation.
00:26:37.759 --> 00:26:39.359
There's always gonna be confrontation in life.
00:26:39.440 --> 00:26:47.599
Like life will put challenges and question marks in front of you and essentially test you with how you're gonna show up in this moment.
00:26:47.680 --> 00:26:50.319
Like, how are you gonna choose to engage with this right now?
00:26:50.480 --> 00:26:55.359
Are you gonna go to that version of you or are you gonna choose to stay in control and conscious awareness here?
00:26:55.519 --> 00:27:00.160
So in those moments, I'm checking in and I'm very much rounded and centered a lot more.
00:27:00.400 --> 00:27:01.359
I love what you said.
00:27:01.519 --> 00:27:10.240
We're we're always going to trigger somebody, we're always gonna make somebody feel uncomfortable, and that's just that's inevitable, and that's what the truth brings.
00:27:10.400 --> 00:27:19.759
Like the truth, or your truth or my truth is gonna be different in accordance to our own perceptions and beliefs and environment and the way that we're brought up and told and taught.
00:27:20.079 --> 00:27:25.839
But fundamentally, we're always going to trigger someone with anything that we say.
00:27:26.000 --> 00:27:28.480
No doubt, even talking about panic attacks, it's gonna trigger something.
00:27:28.799 --> 00:27:32.000
I know, I haven't even thought of it at the end of it when I said the thing about the low-lying anxiety.
00:27:32.079 --> 00:27:33.119
I was like, that was 100%.
00:27:33.359 --> 00:27:39.839
Yeah, you're just because we all have it, yeah, and and we're all gonna be part of that experience of being triggered and being activated.
00:27:40.000 --> 00:27:49.119
And you know, I now see triggers as blessings and opportunities to to grow and evolve inside, and I look forward to those moments that I'm triggered now.
00:27:49.279 --> 00:28:12.240
I think that the difference in me consciously going through an experience and causing someone to be like, I don't like that guy, and I like I've got something against that guy, isn't gonna come from me sharing a truth, it's gonna come from me going like pulling the birdie at somebody or cutting someone off in traffic or saying something personalized to that person that I know that is gonna really upset them.
00:28:12.480 --> 00:28:15.359
Whereas I'm just not gonna do that, you know, I don't do that anymore.
00:28:15.440 --> 00:28:17.599
That's a waste of my energy, it's a waste of my time.
00:28:17.839 --> 00:28:19.759
So I guess that's the separation that I want to create.
00:28:20.400 --> 00:28:28.400
What I'm hearing from you, it's it also needs to be in alignment with you as yourself because I think there is that propensity, especially I know a lot of women, it's like they must like me.
00:28:28.480 --> 00:28:29.519
I must make sure that I'm pleasing.
00:28:29.599 --> 00:28:33.519
I must, and it's kind of that's a very different energy of that's people pleasing energy.
00:28:33.680 --> 00:28:33.920
100%.
00:28:34.240 --> 00:28:34.960
And that's very different.
00:28:35.039 --> 00:28:38.400
But what I'm hearing from you, it's now I'm in alignment with myself, in my integrity.
00:28:38.559 --> 00:28:45.359
And then I'm also extremely mindful of how my actions affect the others and what energy am I creating in this world?
00:28:45.519 --> 00:28:48.720
You know, it's like energy of anger or energy of suffering.
00:28:48.880 --> 00:28:58.480
I even recently was thinking this, even if you're suffering in the job you love, like even in your movement, that's still creating energy of suffering in the world, even if it's for a higher purpose.
00:28:58.720 --> 00:29:01.279
So it's all just a choice with that.
00:29:01.599 --> 00:29:02.400
Absolutely.
00:29:02.720 --> 00:29:04.960
And how yeah, there's levels to that, eh?
00:29:05.200 --> 00:29:20.319
Yeah, yeah, you know, and there's levels to that in the way of we becoming aware of ourselves and choosing ourselves in and in moments and being authentic is great, but also we're living in a society where we're engaging and interacting and communicating with people.
00:29:20.559 --> 00:29:34.000
So the example I'm gonna use is you go to the beach, you've finished your beach, you're now like in your car, you're getting changed, and there's someone lining up for your car park, sitting there with the indicator on, and there's like cars piling up behind them.
00:29:34.240 --> 00:29:37.839
You going, no, I'm choosing to stay in my body.
00:29:38.000 --> 00:29:46.079
I'm gonna take my time, I'm gonna dry myself, I'm gonna do my routine, I'm gonna make sure the music's on, I'm gonna brush my hair, and then I'm gonna pull out.
00:29:46.160 --> 00:29:50.880
You know, that in conjunction with, okay, I know that there's a car waiting for me.
00:29:50.960 --> 00:29:52.480
All right, I'm gonna speed up a little bit.
00:29:52.559 --> 00:29:56.079
I'm gonna throw my routine out of the window just because I know that there's someone waiting for me.
00:29:56.240 --> 00:29:58.880
I'm gonna be respectful of this other human that's waiting.
00:29:59.039 --> 00:30:00.079
That's different, you know?
00:30:00.240 --> 00:30:03.039
Whereas there's like, there's people that are like, no, I'm doing my own thing.
00:30:03.119 --> 00:30:08.240
And I'm like, I'm gonna be me right now and I'm not gonna worry about you because I'm over here living my best life.
00:30:08.960 --> 00:30:24.000
I used to do that, you know, and I was like, hang on a minute, I'm actually like disconnecting myself from the world and those people that are there waiting for the car park or waiting in line for the coffee, or like, hey, I can see that there's a mother here with a child behind me on the line.
00:30:24.079 --> 00:30:31.440
I'm gonna let that person go first because I have the awareness to recognize that she's got a baby to look after, she's got other things going on.
00:30:31.519 --> 00:30:37.119
Like, I've got time here right now, rather than go, no, it's my turn to, you know, it's just like righteousness.
00:30:37.279 --> 00:30:39.039
Yeah, that is such a good analogy.
00:30:39.119 --> 00:30:52.559
And I always I have a joke with my friend how there is two types of people the ones that will just like really slowly cross the pedestrian line or really slowly do that, do the parking, or there's the ones that it's like quickly out, quickly in because they're noticing.
00:30:52.640 --> 00:30:59.200
And yeah, it is you know, this just awareness of the ripple on effect always.
00:30:59.519 --> 00:31:07.680
And again, like this, even when it comes to your business, how have you found like leading from this heart space, leading from is well to those listening?
00:31:07.759 --> 00:31:09.279
He's a three-five generator.
00:31:09.599 --> 00:31:31.759
Um, with that gut, you know, I think sometimes even when you were saying about the two experiences when your first that panic attack when you were with your friend, that experience of like, okay, my heart, my gut, my whole body is saying one thing, then the mind and the shame and the ego, how do you find that within business of leading from that intuitive space?
00:31:32.480 --> 00:31:33.039
It's hard.
00:31:33.200 --> 00:31:33.440
Yeah.
00:31:33.599 --> 00:31:34.400
Like it's hard.
00:31:34.480 --> 00:31:44.240
It's hard because if you do not honor like what your gut is saying and what your body's signaling to you, it just starts to get louder and more powerful and more painful for you.
00:31:44.400 --> 00:31:57.039
So acting on those intuitive feelings and also acting on those truths that you may see in somebody, or when you see actions that are out of alignment, and to give to be completely transparent.
00:31:57.119 --> 00:32:05.440
Like I've had to ask a couple of people to step away from the close circle of C to B C because actions weren't in alignment and integrity with values.
00:32:05.599 --> 00:32:09.599
And it's hard to have those really truthful, hard conversations.
00:32:09.680 --> 00:32:11.039
Like, it's not easy.
00:32:11.279 --> 00:32:28.480
And what is easier is to people please and to be like, ah, so they you know they'll change, they'll get better, but to have those really truthful, hard, challenging conversations is what's needed for their own evolution, their growth, and also for you to honor your integrity and it's a practice, yeah.
00:32:28.559 --> 00:32:33.359
You know, it's a practice that I've continued to trust in and and grow in.
00:32:33.519 --> 00:32:41.920
At the beginning, I used to be a lot more, I'd say, passive and feminine when it comes to leadership, but I'm now like, especially with a baby, I'm like, I don't have fucking time.
00:32:42.240 --> 00:32:47.119
Excuse my language, like I don't have time to like people please and be okay with this if it's out of alignment.
00:32:47.279 --> 00:32:48.960
I've got to keep moving, you know.
00:32:49.200 --> 00:32:52.720
So like I think that's been an energy that shifted in me since being a dad.
00:32:52.880 --> 00:32:57.680
It's like I've got no time to invest in this friendship anymore.
00:32:57.839 --> 00:33:00.960
I've got no time to be a part of that group anymore, I've got no time for that.
00:33:01.279 --> 00:33:18.880
Because when I was just with Jess, when we're just together and I didn't have a baby to look after, I had more time on my hands, I could somewhat compromise and be like, no, we'll go, we'll make it fun ourselves, even though we're not super aligned with that group, we'll just go and you know, make it make it fun for us and we'll make the most of it.
00:33:19.039 --> 00:33:20.799
But now I'm like, no, it's a hard no.
00:33:20.880 --> 00:33:29.039
I'd rather invest my time and energy in things that are really in alignment and in people that are really in alignment with who I am and and the values and stuff that I share.
00:33:29.119 --> 00:33:33.200
And also that are on the same wavelength, you know, they won't compromise anymore.
00:33:33.440 --> 00:33:42.319
Yeah, it's even what you were just saying about being intentional and also as well in integrity with you of okay, well, why would I be forcing or prioritizing this when you know?
00:33:42.640 --> 00:33:43.519
I got other stuff to do.
00:33:43.680 --> 00:33:44.000
Yeah.
00:33:44.160 --> 00:33:44.400
Yeah.
00:33:46.960 --> 00:33:48.480
100% others.
00:33:48.720 --> 00:33:53.200
Um, you mentioned guilt, and I wanted to speak into this kind of someone very close to me, my sister.
00:33:53.359 --> 00:33:57.680
It's her first place that she'll go to when any shame or any doubt is to guilt.
00:33:57.839 --> 00:34:08.880
And how have you moved through or been able to reconcile or continue to reconcile when that feeling or that emotion is it emotion?
00:34:09.119 --> 00:34:10.559
Yeah, comes up in your body.
00:34:10.880 --> 00:34:12.079
Yeah, definitely emotion, you know.
00:34:12.320 --> 00:34:12.480
Yeah.
00:34:12.960 --> 00:34:15.119
Guilt and shame are the are the twoest.
00:34:15.519 --> 00:34:20.320
I'd say dense and heavy and low vibration emotions that we can experience as a human.
00:34:20.400 --> 00:34:28.480
So anyone that's holding on to guilt or shame, like the detrimental effects that it has on your system and your health is it's unthinkable.
00:34:29.039 --> 00:34:29.599
It's a lot.
00:34:29.760 --> 00:34:36.159
And to process guilt and shame like has to be it has to be a somatic release, like it has to come out of your body.
00:34:36.239 --> 00:34:38.400
And guilt and shame usually sits around the hip area.
00:34:38.639 --> 00:34:45.039
That's why we see a lot of manifestation of people with lower back issues, pain in the lower hip region, this area.
00:34:45.119 --> 00:34:46.960
It's a manifestation of shame and guilt.
00:34:47.360 --> 00:34:53.920
And most of us, if not everyone, has had a shameful or experience where they hold guilt on themselves for.
00:34:54.079 --> 00:35:13.440
And like that practice of compassion and forgiveness for self, I would say is one of the most challenging and hard shifts to go through, especially when we become aware of ourselves and we go, oh man, all those things that I used to do were so off and so out, and the way that I treated such and such was so out.
00:35:13.679 --> 00:35:26.559
And to be able to go, rather than holding on to guilt and shame for that version of you, it's a matter of going back into the sensations of or going into the body, checking in and going, like, what am I holding on to right now?
00:35:26.639 --> 00:35:27.840
Like, how does that feel in my body?
00:35:27.920 --> 00:35:35.920
If I put myself in those scenarios and situations of what I was going through, and your body remembers everything, like it'll feel the way that it feels about that scenario.
00:35:36.079 --> 00:35:48.880
And then when you start to attune yourself to those sensations, it's a matter of letting your body amplify those sensations and follow it as it grows and grows, and it'll come to some form of release and expression.
00:35:49.280 --> 00:35:59.599
And we, you know, this is what I teach in Shear about somatic expression, somatic healing, somatic processing, and usually it's released in the form of a squeeze or a tense or a shake.
00:35:59.760 --> 00:36:06.400
So anyone listening right now, that's you're probably naturally attuning yourself to the way that you feel in your body right now, and anyone can do this.
00:36:06.639 --> 00:36:10.800
But track the sensations that are arising or that are most alive in your body right now.
00:36:10.880 --> 00:36:14.000
And we can all do this, we can practice any day and any moment.
00:36:14.159 --> 00:36:21.440
Just soften your gaze and close your eyes and just ask your body, what does it need to communicate or what sensation does it need to feel right now?
00:36:21.679 --> 00:36:28.239
And your body is so intelligent, it'll show you exactly where in the body that area is for you.
00:36:28.400 --> 00:36:33.360
And most of us will feel the sensation predominantly around the chest area, solar plexus area.
00:36:33.519 --> 00:36:37.760
That's where like the nervous energy comes from, that's where the anxiety starts to build and store.
00:36:38.159 --> 00:36:53.280
So when we find that sensation, we can usually ask it to show itself or reveal itself a little bit more, and just having a dialogue and communicating with it, we can invite more of it forward and explaining that it's safe to feel that sensation and it's safe to allow it to come through.
00:36:53.360 --> 00:37:00.480
Like if you feel safe in the environment that you're in, and let it build up and let it build up and let it build up, and then let it start to express itself.
00:37:00.559 --> 00:37:05.199
And usually that's in the form of a tear or the expression might need to shake itself out.
00:37:05.360 --> 00:37:17.679
Like ask what it needs, ask your body what it needs, put yourself in an environment where you can go through that process, do the thing, and then revisit that place in your body and just talk with it, speak with it.
00:37:17.840 --> 00:37:25.039
And usually, 99% of the time, that part of you is just nervous, fearful, or scared of what's coming forth in the future.
00:37:25.199 --> 00:37:30.639
It's a part of you that's being designed to protect you, and that's essentially how the body and nervous system works.
00:37:30.719 --> 00:37:32.800
Like we're built to survive, we're built to evolve.
00:37:33.039 --> 00:37:43.599
So communicating next time with that part of you that starts to arise, having a dialogue with that is really supportive for moving forward and being able to control when that sensation starts to grow again.
00:37:43.760 --> 00:37:47.519
Just checking in and being like, hey, we're all good right now, we're all good, we're okay.
00:37:47.679 --> 00:37:50.639
But when you get through this experience, I've got you, you know.
00:37:50.719 --> 00:37:55.679
And I don't know if you're familiar with parts work, but we've got parts of ourselves that are still, you know, latching on.
00:37:55.760 --> 00:37:58.800
That is just a younger version of us looking to survive and protect.
00:37:59.039 --> 00:38:02.639
So yeah, that's just more practice to check in and feel the body more.
00:38:02.880 --> 00:38:06.880
Yeah, I love how you just combine the somatic and the parts work because you're speaking, I loved that.
00:38:07.039 --> 00:38:20.320
And you know, because sometimes it can feel, and I know from my personal experience and from people that have shared with me, it is this feeling that it can feel so overwhelming, or it can be so big.
00:38:20.400 --> 00:38:24.960
It's I have this thing that happened, or I have this guilt around this thing, and it's okay, I'll just push it back.
00:38:25.119 --> 00:38:29.119
And as you said, it grows and it festers, or it just stays in the body.
00:38:29.199 --> 00:38:44.239
And like, um, I think that's a quote that the organs of the body holds tears that were never shed by the eyes, and just seeing that it just wants to be felt, just wants to be attended to, it just wants to know that you're safe because it's just trying to protect you because it thinks it's a bad person.
00:38:44.400 --> 00:38:48.480
So all of a sudden, every time you have a spare moment, it will just be an intrusive thought.
00:38:48.719 --> 00:38:57.119
Just to, you know, that's because there can be this belief of like if I don't hold on to this guilt, then I'll be a bad I'll you know, I'm a bad person then.
00:38:57.199 --> 00:38:57.440
Yeah.
00:38:57.599 --> 00:39:05.840
And so just this freedom that it can, and you just coming with full acceptance, full forgiveness, and feeling actually brave enough.
00:39:06.159 --> 00:39:07.119
Processing it, processing it.
00:39:07.440 --> 00:39:07.760
Absolutely.
00:39:07.840 --> 00:39:15.039
And then there's a quote that goes along this the lines of we're doing our best in the circumstances that we're provided with the awareness that we have, and it's so true.
00:39:15.119 --> 00:39:18.000
You know, we're always doing our best, no matter where we're at in our journey.
00:39:18.239 --> 00:39:23.519
So compassion and acceptance for who we were and who we once were is so key.
00:39:23.679 --> 00:39:26.880
Otherwise, we just drag that version of ourselves all the way to the grave.
00:39:26.960 --> 00:39:30.400
Yeah, and we go, oh man, like I I didn't need to drag that along.
00:39:30.480 --> 00:39:33.119
I didn't need to feel so guilty about that experience.
00:39:33.199 --> 00:39:34.000
I could have let that go.
00:39:34.079 --> 00:39:40.800
I could have actually what I did, I took it to the next level is I reached out to all those people and I I felt as though that was what I had to do.
00:39:41.039 --> 00:39:44.480
But you don't need to do that, you can actually forgive yourself and go through that process.
00:39:44.639 --> 00:39:48.239
But if you want to take it to the next level and check in with them, you can also do that.
00:39:48.320 --> 00:39:53.599
I had a lot of closure and there was a lot of closure from their sides of the experiences as well.
00:39:53.679 --> 00:39:55.760
And most of them were like, hey, I kind of remember that.
00:39:55.840 --> 00:39:56.800
It's all good, man.
00:39:56.960 --> 00:40:01.199
But a few of them were like, hey, this actually made me feel so seen and understood.
00:40:01.519 --> 00:40:02.960
And thank you.
00:40:03.199 --> 00:40:06.960
So, like, yeah, if you want to take it to the next level, do it and reach out.
00:40:07.199 --> 00:40:13.920
Yeah, I had an experience where she kept on visiting me in my dreams, someone that had had a, you know, in high school, we'd heard a falling out.
00:40:14.079 --> 00:40:16.880
Yeah, don't even remember what happened now, but it always kind of hung around.
00:40:16.960 --> 00:40:20.400
I used to always think, I wonder how she is, I wonder how she's going.
00:40:20.559 --> 00:40:24.800
And I remember, yeah, she started appearing in my dreams, coming, we're visiting each other.
00:40:24.960 --> 00:40:28.000
Yeah, and I just sent her a message and it was a beautiful exchange.
00:40:28.159 --> 00:40:34.880
And then, you know, then it feels, you know, we can't control how the other person's experience will be around it.
00:40:34.960 --> 00:40:39.280
It's similar to how you're saying, you just come knowing that you're coming with positive intent, how they respond.
00:40:39.519 --> 00:40:41.199
If they want to not respond, beautiful.
00:40:41.280 --> 00:40:42.639
That's also that's up to them.
00:40:42.800 --> 00:40:43.840
So thank you for sharing that.
00:40:44.000 --> 00:40:45.280
Yeah, my pleasure.
00:40:45.599 --> 00:40:49.039
So, how has been the journey moving into fatherhood?
00:40:49.519 --> 00:40:50.400
I don't know where to start.
00:40:50.480 --> 00:40:53.599
It's been the most it's been the most enlightening journey.
00:40:53.760 --> 00:41:07.519
And that word comes to mind because there were so many things that I was unaware of when I wasn't a dad and I wasn't a father, and and now I have such new perspectives, and I'm now able to see things so differently.
00:41:07.599 --> 00:41:13.920
And the way that I engage with the world is different, the way that I engage with my partner is different, the way that I engage with myself is different.
00:41:14.559 --> 00:41:20.400
Man, like it's a quest, like it's not a journey, like it's a full quest that I don't think will finish or end.
00:41:20.880 --> 00:41:22.639
There's no destination with it.
00:41:22.719 --> 00:41:25.519
But what comes to mind the most is her presence.
00:41:25.920 --> 00:41:28.159
Like, she's just slowed me down so much.
00:41:28.800 --> 00:41:31.519
And priorities are a big one.
00:41:31.599 --> 00:41:44.159
Like, you know, I thought my purpose and reason to be on this planet was to build a community and to help the ascension of consciousness through individuals, through community breathwork sessions, through the events that we run.
00:41:44.400 --> 00:41:46.000
I was like, that's it, that's why I'm here.
00:41:46.079 --> 00:41:46.960
You know, that's why I'm here.
00:41:47.039 --> 00:41:48.000
And I was convinced.
00:41:48.159 --> 00:41:52.480
I said to Jess, my partner, when we first started seeing each other, I was like, babe, I love you.
00:41:53.039 --> 00:41:56.800
But C to B C call to be conscious, my mission is number one priority.
00:41:56.960 --> 00:42:00.079
You know, in the moment she was like, you know, meh.
00:42:00.239 --> 00:42:04.320
But deep down she was like, No, I I love that in a man, and and that attracts me to a man.
00:42:04.480 --> 00:42:04.800
Very much.
00:42:05.039 --> 00:42:08.800
But now, since having Florence, I'm like, what do you mean your mission is called?
00:42:09.280 --> 00:42:22.239
Your mission is to be a dad and to be the best dad you can be, and to I would say lead and embody the practices and your teachings and show that through the way that you're a father, and that is more important and most important than any of your business stuff.
00:42:22.400 --> 00:42:24.480
Your business is so secondary now to that.
00:42:24.880 --> 00:42:28.000
Family, Florence, my partner, number one.
00:42:28.320 --> 00:42:30.320
So that's created a big shift in me.
00:42:30.400 --> 00:42:34.639
And the energetics behind that with business, like those that are listening, has been profound.
00:42:34.880 --> 00:42:38.960
One, because I've taken pressure off my business.
00:42:39.199 --> 00:42:40.480
I've taken pressure off it.
00:42:40.559 --> 00:42:44.559
I'm less in that forceful energy of like no, it doesn't, it doesn't matter.
00:42:44.800 --> 00:42:47.440
You know, it's like just a fun thing now that I do as a hobby.
00:42:47.599 --> 00:42:54.960
So the pressure that I've taken off from an energetic standpoint has really enabled the business to thrive and evolve this year.
00:42:55.039 --> 00:42:57.199
It's been crazy to watch the energetics behind it.
00:42:57.360 --> 00:42:58.400
And the ego doesn't like that.
00:42:58.480 --> 00:43:00.880
The ego thinks, no, I have to be in control of everything.
00:43:00.960 --> 00:43:04.559
I have to make, you know, and I have to be, and you're just you're seeing it.
00:43:04.719 --> 00:43:05.519
Yeah, absolutely.
00:43:05.760 --> 00:43:06.320
Yeah, powerful.
00:43:06.719 --> 00:43:18.800
She's really, Lawrence, she's really brought me back to center and back to I'd say the the purest why of human existence to create family and to build connection between each other.
00:43:19.039 --> 00:43:20.400
The mirror is so strong.
00:43:20.480 --> 00:43:25.679
You know, like we we spent Jess and I spent four days after birth just in tears crying.
00:43:25.760 --> 00:43:28.639
Like the oxytocin was so strong.
00:43:28.800 --> 00:43:31.920
It was and you know, I've been in the space for a while.
00:43:32.000 --> 00:43:43.760
I've worked with parents, I've worked with so many different people, and with breath work, I educate people on what's happening from a chemical standpoint in the body, we release oxytocin, we feel this euphoria after breathwork experiences.
00:43:43.920 --> 00:43:49.920
And I had somewhat an understanding or a perception of what I would feel through the birth process with Florence.
00:43:50.000 --> 00:43:56.719
So I was kind of stitching myself up because the more that we concentrate on something, the more that it gets further away from us in a way.
00:43:56.960 --> 00:44:05.920
So I had this perception and I'd put Pressure on this experience that it was going to be euphoric and powerful and make me feel drunk and intoxicated.
00:44:06.079 --> 00:44:10.800
I put all the pressure on the birth, you know, and I come to it, and I was like, Oh, this stuff's gonna happen.
00:44:11.039 --> 00:44:15.440
And you know, even though I was putting so much pressure on it, it blew me away tenfold.
00:44:15.519 --> 00:44:16.800
It blew me out of the park.
00:44:16.880 --> 00:44:24.239
Like I was like in paralysis with the love and oxytocin that was coming, and I'd never experienced anything like that before in my life.
00:44:24.639 --> 00:44:32.880
The power of those sensations were just like incredible, like undeniably the most powerful thing I've ever experienced in my life.
00:44:33.039 --> 00:44:42.320
Like the love that you can experience through that experience with your daughter or your son through your partner, like undeniably profound.
00:44:42.400 --> 00:44:50.639
And it lasted for four days, and it got to the point where Jess and I started to feel like really vulnerable, and there's like almost sickness of vulnerability, and it was scary.
00:44:50.719 --> 00:44:54.639
It got to like a point where it was quite scary because every time we'd lock eyes, there would just be tears.
00:44:54.880 --> 00:44:56.960
Just be like, woof, tears, woof, tears.
00:44:57.039 --> 00:44:58.639
Look at Florence, woof, tears.
00:44:58.800 --> 00:45:01.039
And it lasted for yeah, four or five days.
00:45:01.280 --> 00:45:02.960
I was like, is this gonna slow down?
00:45:03.119 --> 00:45:07.920
And then music, like everything was just transmitting and hitting our body and at a whole new level.
00:45:08.079 --> 00:45:13.199
Like the first song I listened to after this experience was Fat Freddy's Drop and 10 feet tall.
00:45:13.280 --> 00:45:16.639
And it's like the words and the lyrics were like hitting me, and I was crying.
00:45:16.719 --> 00:45:18.320
I was like, what is happening?
00:45:18.559 --> 00:45:23.039
But it's exploded the heart open, and I truly believe capacity, it's just you can hold more.
00:45:23.199 --> 00:45:25.519
You can hold more, and I I truly believe that's our natural state.
00:45:25.920 --> 00:45:32.079
We're that open to the world, we're that sensitive to the world, and we can feel everything to its fullest potential, and truest potential.
00:45:32.159 --> 00:45:36.719
I feel that we're operating at a really numb, yeah, dumbed down vibrational standpoint.
00:45:36.800 --> 00:45:39.119
And yeah, window of tolerance, small.
00:45:39.199 --> 00:45:46.239
And and when you're cracked open like that through experiences like birth, you remember what our potential is to feel as a human being.
00:45:46.400 --> 00:45:54.000
And it's the message that I share and continually transmit through our community is we're here to become more sensitive again.
00:45:54.159 --> 00:46:01.599
We're here to remember how connected we can be to people, to music, to our environment, to the world, to nature.
00:46:01.760 --> 00:46:06.559
We're we're here to to come back to that, you know, and the whole process of coming through some of the work that we do.
00:46:06.719 --> 00:46:21.119
It's unraveling the armor, defense systems in the nervous system, and reopening ourselves to the world so we can feel an experience like that because a lot of us are numb, we feel disconnected from our body, we feel disconnected from the world, and we struggle to feel a part of it.
00:46:21.360 --> 00:46:31.519
And I I I truly believe that a big reason for that is because we become so numb through the foods that we eat, the stuff that we listen to, the people that we hang out with, and all the toxins in our environment.
00:46:31.599 --> 00:46:45.119
You know, there's a whole lot, but the biggest thing I feel is the emotional closeness and the closing off of the heart that we all put on ourselves from hurt, from pain, from grief, from heartache, through relationships, through family.
00:46:45.280 --> 00:46:50.719
We all close down because we're so scared to feel that pain again from the love that we felt once before.
00:46:51.199 --> 00:46:57.679
So it's like a remembering and an unraveling of our heart to come back open to the world, to feel and experience it.
00:46:57.760 --> 00:47:06.719
But it's a double-bladed sword because it's inevitably gonna hurt again one day if we do open ourselves back up to relationships, to family, to friends, to the world.
00:47:06.960 --> 00:47:14.800
And that's the process, that's a practice to trust in yourself and to trust in your art again and communicate with it that it's okay, we can open back up.
00:47:14.960 --> 00:47:22.239
We can, and it is gonna hurt again one day, but let's just open up right now and remember how much there is to feel and experience in the world.
00:47:22.719 --> 00:47:29.440
It sounds like it almost was this heart opening with Jess, and then it was like, and then the three of you, it was then again expanded.
00:47:29.760 --> 00:47:30.239
Levels.
00:47:30.559 --> 00:47:36.880
So I feel obviously life can, as you said, it can be scary to live from that place.
00:47:37.199 --> 00:47:38.400
And I'm feeling called to ask this.
00:47:38.480 --> 00:47:41.760
What would be your advice, especially because most of the people listening will be women?
00:47:42.239 --> 00:47:47.599
How can they support their men or see that this is possible and available for them?
00:47:48.159 --> 00:48:00.639
Because again, I know women also struggle with this, but I think I can see from a lot of my clients like I would love my husband to be able to even learn about his human design, like his basic, or to be able to practice meditation a little bit.
00:48:00.800 --> 00:48:02.400
What's your words with that?
00:48:02.719 --> 00:48:05.760
That's one of the questions that I continually ask and I get the most.
00:48:05.840 --> 00:48:11.440
Yeah, women wanting their men to step into the space and to evolve and grow.
00:48:11.519 --> 00:48:19.679
And you know, I always share this in a bit of a comedic way of a funny way that women are so much more evolved than men, like full stop.
00:48:19.760 --> 00:48:25.199
Like women are a lot more connected to their bodies, they're a lot more intuitive, they're a lot more sensitive.
00:48:25.360 --> 00:48:29.519
And us as men are like, I truly believe we're 200 years behind in the evolution.
00:48:29.599 --> 00:48:35.199
We're just so stubborn and contracted and stuck in our ways, and we don't want change and we don't want to be vulnerable.
00:48:35.360 --> 00:48:46.159
And it's I heard something that who knows what this even is, but it was like for a woman to be born, she has to have had a few past lives as a man, but a man is never a man's fresh, it doesn't matter.
00:48:46.320 --> 00:48:47.920
He says have a new run, mate, it's good.
00:48:48.239 --> 00:48:48.400
Yeah.
00:48:48.719 --> 00:48:49.280
I hear that.
00:48:49.360 --> 00:48:50.480
And like I agree.
00:48:50.639 --> 00:48:59.440
It's it's hard, you know, and as a man, I th I feel we've been so distorted with what we perceive to be as a good man.
00:48:59.519 --> 00:49:12.719
Like we've forgotten what a woman truly desires in a man, and we've been told that it's all of the I would say it's all of the support through finance, and it's the house, and it's the toys, and it's the car, and it's the purse.
00:49:12.960 --> 00:49:14.639
And it's so not any of that.
00:49:14.719 --> 00:49:18.719
It's actually to feel safe in its essence, it's to feel safe.
00:49:19.039 --> 00:49:23.679
And it's not as easy as telling a woman she feels and she is safe.
00:49:23.760 --> 00:49:26.239
It's not you can't just tell your woman you're saying, you're safe.
00:49:26.400 --> 00:49:33.119
It's in the actions that you partake in, it's in decisions that you make for a family, it's in the leadership that you show.
00:49:33.360 --> 00:49:35.840
It's in nervous system regulation.
00:49:36.000 --> 00:49:37.360
It's like they can feel you.
00:49:37.519 --> 00:49:40.800
Like a woman, as I said, is so much more sensitive than us as men.
00:49:40.880 --> 00:49:48.960
They can feel when you are dysregulated, when you come home from work and you haven't taken a breath for yourself and you come in through the door, you're still racing a million miles an hour, they can feel that.
00:49:49.360 --> 00:49:52.400
Probably even such a mirror with Florence as well as a baby daughter.
00:49:52.719 --> 00:49:53.679
It is 100%.
00:49:54.239 --> 00:49:56.079
Like the sensitivity is really there.
00:49:56.559 --> 00:49:57.280
And it's cool.
00:49:57.440 --> 00:50:02.559
I'm going off track here, but you know, Florence, she is the same cerebral spinal fluid as Jess.
00:50:02.639 --> 00:50:07.280
So she's actually mirroring the way that Jess feels in her nervous system simultaneously.
00:50:07.440 --> 00:50:11.519
So when Jess is activated, Florence gets activated without even having connection.
00:50:11.679 --> 00:50:11.920
Wow.
00:50:12.159 --> 00:50:12.719
Crazy.
00:50:12.880 --> 00:50:17.840
But going back to the men sides of things, like the the answer is we can't force.
00:50:17.920 --> 00:50:28.800
And when we force and we try and invite them to do things, it actually pushes them further away, and they will feel under threat and they'll feel insecure and they'll feel like there's something wrong with them, and they'll get get more defensive, and you kind of go back, you backtrack.
00:50:29.280 --> 00:50:42.159
The way that I would invite them into the space is by bringing them into things such as could be conscious, bringing them down to things that are are more now seen as a social norm, but still have profound seeds planted in those sessions.
00:50:42.320 --> 00:50:48.960
I will avoid all the esoteric words, those like high, big articulated spiritual words.
00:50:49.039 --> 00:50:55.280
I don't use any of them in my events, and it's because it puts people off that are new to it, and it's hard to digest and connect with.
00:50:55.519 --> 00:51:02.559
So I'm actually like, I dumb myself down a lot at those events because it's easier to resonate with.
00:51:05.679 --> 00:51:11.599
If I try and be like super scientific and really articulated and intelligent, you lose half the people.
00:51:11.679 --> 00:51:12.800
And I've played with it before.
00:51:12.960 --> 00:51:18.320
I can stand up there and speak words, and I literally feel the whole group just disappear.
00:51:18.480 --> 00:51:22.639
Oh, you know, and I'll I'll play with it, but okay, I've lost you and and make a joke.
00:51:22.719 --> 00:51:25.039
But it's the same thing with men and your partners.
00:51:25.119 --> 00:51:32.400
Don't make it so complicated and try not to use big language and words, try and make it really simple.
00:51:32.480 --> 00:51:42.719
And like I feel that brotherhood circles and men's groups is really necessary, but they're still really intimidating to every like everyday blokes and men that are out there.
00:51:42.880 --> 00:51:53.840
So I'm trying to do my best to really again bridge the gap into those spaces and bring people together in the form of co-sex experiences with these beach events.
00:51:54.159 --> 00:52:01.440
And a lot of the men come down there that get dragged by their girlfriends, and the other ones that come up to me at the end and go, bro, what was that?
00:52:01.519 --> 00:52:04.480
Like, I feel so different, I feel so good, I feel so present.
00:52:04.719 --> 00:52:06.960
And I'm just like, welcome back, welcome back.
00:52:07.199 --> 00:52:12.719
You know, this is where we're meant to be living from a place of presence and stability and grandedness.
00:52:13.039 --> 00:52:26.880
So yeah, to the all the women that are listening, they're like, Man, I need to get my man into the stuff, bring them down to one of these events because they don't see them as the challenging environment to be a part of, and just trust that the seeds we planted there for them to feel the change inside of them.
00:52:27.119 --> 00:52:36.159
And you know, there's even ways that you can go about it of speaking into things that men connect with more in terms of like sexual connection and intimacy.
00:52:36.400 --> 00:52:53.119
You can explain that breath work brings a lot more sexual sensation and experience in the bed and use ways to bring in this stuff that's quite deep and spiritual, but in ways that are playful and fun rather than mate, you need to do some breath work, you know, regulate your nervous system.
00:52:53.199 --> 00:52:56.800
How about like why don't you learn some breath work so we can incorporate it in the bedroom?
00:52:57.119 --> 00:53:01.760
Be more invitational through fun and play and lightness rather than you need to sort your shit out, mate.
00:53:01.840 --> 00:53:02.960
Yeah, but you need to fix you.
00:53:03.039 --> 00:53:03.760
Yeah, I need to fix you.
00:53:03.840 --> 00:53:04.480
You broke it, mate.
00:53:04.559 --> 00:53:05.039
I sort it out.
00:53:05.119 --> 00:53:08.960
Yeah, I've seen your breathing, it's bad because yeah, we take that as a personal attack.
00:53:09.199 --> 00:53:11.760
Yeah, and so would any, you know, so would anyone.
00:53:12.079 --> 00:53:16.639
And I feel like as well, I often think this with my partner, he's he lets things so slide with me so much.
00:53:16.800 --> 00:53:27.519
Yeah, and men that usually do, but maybe us women we like and as well because we want with such a feminine masculine of you want your man to be the best he can be, and you want him to have his best experience.
00:53:27.760 --> 00:53:41.519
I've always felt like it's best to just be that space that when it's needed, like they can come to you, or when it's needed, and having I've always dropped little human design things with that because my partner, he's not necessarily spiritual, yeah, but a really good man.
00:53:41.599 --> 00:53:43.760
Yeah, really good man, best friend.
00:53:44.000 --> 00:53:50.320
I just feel like that something as well, because it was even something that I moved through of does he need to be really spiritual?
00:53:50.480 --> 00:54:00.079
No, and I was like, there was this moment when he's he makes me laugh the most out of anyone in the world, and he makes me like I get so silly with him, and I don't, I'm not like that with uh anyone else in the world.
00:54:00.239 --> 00:54:05.039
And I was like, this is the most spiritual experience laughing and just enjoying life.
00:54:05.280 --> 00:54:05.679
I love that.
00:54:05.920 --> 00:54:09.280
He has a surfing, he does his things, and yeah, he's also extremely wise.
00:54:09.360 --> 00:54:24.000
Yes, he might not have my language and my lingo, so I feel like sometimes we can put these parameters, and I can speak for myself as a woman, I can put these parameters of what right or what is wrong, and it's no what actually at the core do I desire in a conscious relationship?
00:54:24.400 --> 00:54:28.400
And then if that's being met beautiful, we don't have to create extra criteria.
00:54:28.719 --> 00:54:29.519
No, I love that.
00:54:29.599 --> 00:54:47.760
And you know, I could probably talk for another hour on this, but in the space of growth and let's use the word consciousness and spirituality, a lot of men are actually misunderstanding what it means to be self-aware and to be responsible and take ownership for who they are and how they're showing up in the world.
00:54:48.079 --> 00:54:59.199
And there's this, I would say, obsession with personal growth and evolution in their spiritual journey, and it's actually becoming too much, and the spiritual ego is getting really clever.
00:54:59.519 --> 00:55:13.920
And I I think a lot of women that are vulnerable and new to conscious men are getting caught up in that, thinking that man's gonna be conscious and he's he's gonna be the guy, and then end up in a really manipulative relationship or situation.
00:55:14.159 --> 00:55:24.320
So discernment is so key, and like woman listening, like tuning in with your body and listening to how it feels when you're around men is the most important aspect of the whole relationship.
00:55:24.639 --> 00:55:33.840
And when you shared that just before about how your man's not spiritual, but he's got good values, he's got good morals, he treats you well clearly, like that's all you need.
00:55:34.559 --> 00:55:38.320
Like that's and that is this most that's the most important work exactly spiritually, exactly.
00:55:38.480 --> 00:55:42.079
Like treat everyone well being patient, being kind, being loving, you know.
00:55:42.480 --> 00:55:44.639
You can have all the words, do all the practices, have the routines.
00:55:45.599 --> 00:55:46.880
But what are you doing behind closed doors?
00:55:47.199 --> 00:55:50.400
And what are you doing when no one's watching and when the cameras aren't on?
00:55:50.480 --> 00:55:51.760
Like that is the work right there.
00:55:52.320 --> 00:56:07.199
And I'm realizing like this next chapter of my life, and it's quite a scary one because I'm usually so on social media and interacting on social media, and I feel so disconnected from it because I'm seeing so much inauthenticity on there, and it's really hard to watch.
00:56:07.360 --> 00:56:14.880
People are sharing all the right words and saying the right things, but you you don't feel it, and the transmission is so inauthentic, it's not funny.
00:56:14.960 --> 00:56:19.679
So I'm feeling like so disconnected from my phone and from social media these days.
00:56:19.840 --> 00:56:33.119
But going back to what you just mentioned before about your partner and to the woman that are listening, if your man takes ownership of his actions and he knows when he messes up and he's like I messed up, babe, like the way that I treated you, the way that I talked to you isn't good, and I've learned so much from that.
00:56:33.280 --> 00:56:34.239
That's a green flag.
00:56:34.559 --> 00:56:37.679
If he doesn't take ownership and he blames you, no good.
00:56:38.000 --> 00:56:47.599
And but the other two things, like if he takes ownership and you feel safe when he does that, and in moments of vulnerability, he can be with you in the vulnerability.
00:56:47.760 --> 00:56:48.000
Right.
00:56:48.159 --> 00:56:54.800
If he's a blubbery mess all the time and he's like just being way too emotional, that's also not that's not a masculine trait either.
00:56:55.119 --> 00:57:05.679
So again, we could talk about this stuff for hours, but the perfect man isn't out there, but most men and all men should be able to take ownership and responsibility for the actions and know who they are and how they're showing up.
00:57:05.920 --> 00:57:08.159
That's it, you know that's what makes us feel safe.
00:57:08.480 --> 00:57:13.840
That's what makes you feel safe as a woman and is the most important component to a relationship, feeling safe in that.
00:57:14.079 --> 00:57:14.559
Yeah.
00:57:14.880 --> 00:57:16.239
Well, thank you so much, Ryan.
00:57:16.480 --> 00:57:17.440
I could keep talking.
00:57:18.960 --> 00:57:22.320
I have so many other things I'd love to ask you, but respectful of your time.
00:57:22.400 --> 00:57:23.440
So thank you so much.
00:57:23.599 --> 00:57:30.239
And I'd love to have you here for everyone that could find more of your work, all that's happening with Call to Be Conscious, or your teaching, please share.
00:57:30.559 --> 00:57:32.000
No, thank you so much for having me.
00:57:32.079 --> 00:57:33.119
It's been it's been great.
00:57:33.280 --> 00:57:40.800
I know we only had 45 minutes, and uh, as I mentioned, I feel like we're just getting to the conversations into the good stuff, but we'll have to do it another time.
00:57:40.880 --> 00:57:42.559
And I'd also love to have you on our podcast.
00:57:43.039 --> 00:57:47.599
I'm not very great at it, but and in terms of the consistency, but I'd love to I'd love to do that.
00:57:47.679 --> 00:57:48.000
Yeah.
00:57:48.239 --> 00:57:49.760
And my partner would love to meet you.
00:57:50.320 --> 00:57:52.800
I was just thinking in my head, and I really want to meet Jess.
00:57:53.039 --> 00:57:54.079
She would love to talk to you.
00:57:54.320 --> 00:57:56.719
So Jess is a 6'2 projector, I've just been told.
00:57:56.800 --> 00:58:00.480
So she is incredibly wise, incredibly natural at all she does.
00:58:00.559 --> 00:58:01.920
So she'd be great on his own.
00:58:02.000 --> 00:58:02.320
That's crazy.
00:58:02.880 --> 00:58:04.400
Yeah, I yes, actually, I would love that.
00:58:04.639 --> 00:58:10.320
And for those that want to follow social media, as I just mentioned, I'm not very good at my personal account and I haven't been very active on there.
00:58:10.400 --> 00:58:11.039
But you can find that through.
00:58:11.280 --> 00:58:12.000
You're in your integrity.
00:58:13.039 --> 00:58:15.679
You can find that through Call to Be Conscious if you want to check out my private channel.
00:58:15.760 --> 00:58:20.400
But yeah, all the events, everything that we offer and the courses that we do are all through Call to Be Conscious.
00:58:20.639 --> 00:58:21.760
Yeah, thanks again for having me.
00:58:22.000 --> 00:58:22.719
Great sharing with you.
00:58:23.039 --> 00:58:25.840
And thank you for doing all the work that you do and sharing all you do.
00:58:26.000 --> 00:58:27.360
It's needed, it's necessary.
00:58:27.519 --> 00:58:29.280
And so many women look up to you.
00:58:29.360 --> 00:58:33.280
And we need role models, we need guides, and we need embodied people out here.
00:58:33.519 --> 00:58:35.039
So thank you for doing the work that you do.
00:58:35.280 --> 00:58:35.519
Thank you.
00:58:35.760 --> 00:58:36.400
All received.
00:58:36.559 --> 00:58:37.519
We're right back at you.
00:58:37.679 --> 00:58:44.880
It's really refreshing and it's really beautiful to see like a man in his integrity, conscious, embodied, and just sharing with our ego.
00:58:44.960 --> 00:58:45.760
So it's really beautiful.
00:58:45.840 --> 00:58:46.400
So thank you.
00:58:46.800 --> 00:58:47.199
Pleasure.
00:58:47.280 --> 00:58:48.000
Thanks for having me.
00:58:49.360 --> 00:58:50.800
Thank you so much, Ryan.
00:58:50.880 --> 00:58:51.920
It was such a pleasure.
00:58:52.079 --> 00:58:59.199
And for those who would like to explore Ryan's offerings more, would like to join an event for Cool to Be Conscious, definitely follow them on Instagram.
00:58:59.280 --> 00:59:00.800
That's where they announce.
00:59:01.039 --> 00:59:04.320
And they have events all over Australia.
00:59:04.639 --> 00:59:12.800
I'm so inspired by people that are just so true to their heart in their integrity, creating these spaces and you really feel it at the call to be conscious events.
00:59:12.880 --> 00:59:26.480
And as Ryan was just saying, it's a great thing to bring your friends and your partner to that may be really new to this work, maybe really, yeah, like open and excited, but it might feel intimidating in other places.
00:59:26.559 --> 00:59:35.039
And this is really the beauty and what I really felt when I've gone to the call to be conscious events was just like, no, this is such a beautiful, welcoming space.
00:59:35.280 --> 00:59:39.679
And starting the mornings like that, it's just it's so activating and so beautiful.
00:59:39.840 --> 00:59:43.760
So definitely, definitely follow Ryan and Cool to Be Conscious.
00:59:43.840 --> 00:59:46.400
They're just it's just great to have that energy in your life.
00:59:46.480 --> 00:59:48.239
I really enjoy what Ryan shares.
00:59:48.320 --> 00:59:55.760
I know he would just show him that social media is not feeling a line for him, but the way he shares on social media is definitely a line for me.
00:59:55.840 --> 00:59:57.039
Like it's great to follow.
00:59:57.119 --> 00:59:58.800
So I'm very grateful for Ryan.
00:59:58.880 --> 01:00:02.159
And I would recommend as well, if you're not in Australia, just have a look.
01:00:02.239 --> 01:00:09.280
There's people doing events like this in America, in Europe, and you might have to scour them out.
01:00:09.519 --> 01:00:10.800
But if not, go online.
01:00:11.119 --> 01:00:15.519
It's so important community and to feel like you are not alone in your journey.
01:00:15.679 --> 01:00:16.639
Okay, my loves.
01:00:16.800 --> 01:00:22.000
If you wanted to join the advanced human design certification, this is your chance, this is your time.
01:00:22.159 --> 01:00:24.880
This is the last time I will be running it live in this manner.
01:00:25.119 --> 01:00:26.159
Such a powerful space.
01:00:26.239 --> 01:00:26.960
I'll leave it at that.
01:00:27.199 --> 01:00:27.920
Such a powerful space.
01:00:28.000 --> 01:00:37.679
You will learn everything you need to learn in order to become an advanced human design practitioner, and you will also connect with beautiful, like-minded people that are with you every step of the way for six months.
01:00:37.920 --> 01:00:44.559
What makes this certification different is that you receive mentoring and guidance by me, and you also have that community connection.
01:00:44.639 --> 01:00:49.599
There's so many that don't include that, or that you might be one of 200 people in there.
01:00:49.840 --> 01:00:55.599
So, what I enjoy here is that you will feel like you are part of the family here with us.
01:00:55.760 --> 01:00:56.960
So very excited.
01:00:57.119 --> 01:01:00.880
We're starting soon, so definitely jump on in and thank you so much.
01:01:01.119 --> 01:01:03.119
I will speak to you next week.
00:00:00.479 --> 00:00:10.080
Hello and welcome to the Designed as You podcast where we explore the depths of your being and how to navigate this beautiful but wild life through the lens of human design.
00:00:10.320 --> 00:00:17.039
I'm your host Hilary, a human design teacher and intuitive, and I'm here to help you evolve into the person you came here to be.
00:00:17.280 --> 00:00:18.480
Let's dive in.
00:00:18.879 --> 00:00:20.239
Hello, my loves.
00:00:20.399 --> 00:00:22.079
Welcome back to the podcast.
00:00:22.320 --> 00:00:29.359
I have just returned from our rest assured retreat at Somer Byron Day, and it was such a beautiful four days.
00:00:29.600 --> 00:00:36.640
It still never ceases to amaze me and always blows my mind what can happen when women come together like that.
00:00:36.799 --> 00:00:42.719
We learn, we connect, we rest, we play, we create, we heal.
00:00:42.960 --> 00:00:43.840
It's so beautiful.
00:00:43.920 --> 00:00:46.799
It honestly actually makes me feel a little bit emotional.
00:00:46.960 --> 00:00:50.719
And them all leaving, so bright, so light.
00:00:50.799 --> 00:00:52.320
And I'm really proud of these women.
00:00:52.399 --> 00:00:54.320
They move through some big stuff.
00:00:54.479 --> 00:00:57.200
Like in one of the breathwork sessions, it was powerful.
00:00:57.280 --> 00:01:00.799
It was probably one of the biggest breathwork sessions I've held.
00:01:01.039 --> 00:01:05.920
And you know, it was just a testament to them of how deep and how far they could go.
00:01:06.159 --> 00:01:10.159
And then as well, just the joy, the laughter, the fun that was had.
00:01:10.239 --> 00:01:12.959
I don't think I've laughed like that in so long.
00:01:13.359 --> 00:01:20.079
We had this beautiful evening under the stars, then a fire, and it was just giggles, giggles all night.
00:01:20.159 --> 00:01:27.359
So so grateful for these women, so grateful that they said yes to themselves and that they were so open to learn, invest, and grow in themselves.
00:01:27.599 --> 00:01:29.920
And today we have a very special guest for you.
00:01:30.079 --> 00:01:31.680
His name is Ryan Hubbard.
00:01:32.159 --> 00:01:34.799
He is a founder of Cool to Be Conscious.
00:01:34.959 --> 00:01:41.920
He's a father, a partner, an entrepreneur, a teacher, and also a breath work facilitator.
00:01:42.159 --> 00:01:55.760
So I asked Ryan on, because he was actually speaking of community and speaking of connection, when I returned back from Australia after living overseas for a couple of years, and when I moved overseas, I really, you know, did dive into my own spiritual journey, my own self-development.
00:01:55.920 --> 00:01:58.959
It was probably where I had my most biggest shifts and changes.
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And there was this, I wouldn't say fear, but I would say apprehension returning back to Australia.
00:02:05.280 --> 00:02:17.280
And at first, I thought I was only returning back just to visit my family and I was going to go back overseas because I really didn't feel or I wasn't aware yet of this conscious community that was in Australia.
00:02:17.439 --> 00:02:19.840
When I left, I was not in that community.
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And I felt like I was the only one moving through what I was moving through.
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So I went traveling and I went and moved to Berlin, I moved to Spain, I moved to Mexico, I moved around a lot, Costa Rica.
00:02:31.599 --> 00:02:36.159
And over those few years, I'm so grateful I did that time.
00:02:36.319 --> 00:02:40.240
At the same time, my soul was calling me to come home, to come back to Australia.
00:02:40.319 --> 00:02:51.280
I felt such a strong calling home because I really felt like I wanted to bring these things that I was learning, human design, back to Australia because it was still very new here in Australia.
00:02:51.520 --> 00:02:55.280
I actually didn't know anyone that was practicing human design in Australia.
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And I felt like I really feel called to go home.
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I miss my family, I miss people here, I miss the weather, I miss the lifestyle.
00:03:04.719 --> 00:03:10.159
And when I returned home, it felt like such a strong homecoming of like, oh, this is where I'm meant to be.
00:03:10.319 --> 00:03:19.039
But when I did return, I saw Australia with new eyes and I felt so connected and in awe of how incredible this country is.
00:03:19.199 --> 00:03:26.560
And I feel like a lot of us feel that we might go away from our home place and then feel called to come back and see it so differently.
00:03:26.719 --> 00:03:31.599
It might not be your forever place, but you can see it with a different lens and a different appreciation now.
00:03:32.000 --> 00:03:34.879
And when I returned, I was really craving this community.
00:03:34.960 --> 00:03:48.800
And I remember writing it on a list and I shared this story to Ryan where I almost felt like I manifested my connection with Call to Be Conscious because I was really craving meeting new conscious people or people that were interested in similar things that I was interested in, had similar language.
00:03:48.879 --> 00:03:51.919
You know, we just kind of crave to feel a belonging or community.
00:03:52.080 --> 00:03:59.439
And so, long story short, I think it popped up maybe on my Instagram, or maybe I heard them on a podcast or something.
00:03:59.520 --> 00:04:02.719
I can't remember exactly where I found them, but that's usually how it happens.
00:04:02.879 --> 00:04:13.919
The universe puts you in there or puts them in your line of awareness when you're ready for it or when you're open and your rouse system is connecting to it, can find it, can notice it.
00:04:14.080 --> 00:04:15.439
And it was even before I left.
00:04:15.680 --> 00:04:19.759
There, of course, there was a conscious community here in Australia, but I just was not connected to it.
00:04:19.839 --> 00:04:20.480
I didn't see it.
00:04:20.560 --> 00:04:24.240
I wasn't aware of it because I wasn't looking for it, or I wasn't open to it.
00:04:24.480 --> 00:04:32.240
So I remember being like, okay, I'm I was at the Gold Coast and I saw that they had one in Burley at 6 a.m.
00:04:32.399 --> 00:04:32.720
or something.
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And I remember like being quite nervous, and it was like the first week I had returned back to Australia, and I was like, okay, I'll go to this event.
00:04:42.639 --> 00:04:48.480
And they do big breathwork events and ice baths and meditation and connection at the beach.
00:04:48.639 --> 00:04:52.560
And I remember going there, and it was still at this point quite small groups.
00:04:52.720 --> 00:04:57.759
It's beautiful to watch how much cool to be conscious this movement has grown.
00:04:58.000 --> 00:05:03.600
So I went there and yeah, it was such a beautiful event, and it was such a beautiful experience.
00:05:03.759 --> 00:05:05.920
And the people I met was so beautiful.
00:05:06.079 --> 00:05:09.439
I remember just being like, wow, this is amazing on the beach doing breath work.
00:05:09.759 --> 00:05:11.439
We all went for a swim afterward.
00:05:11.600 --> 00:05:12.879
I met incredible people as well.
00:05:12.959 --> 00:05:14.560
It was beautiful, like conscious men.
00:05:14.720 --> 00:05:17.439
I remember being like, wow, there's like men here are talking about this.
00:05:17.519 --> 00:05:19.680
Wherever I'd gone, there was often just women.
00:05:20.000 --> 00:05:24.160
And then I met this beautiful woman and we became very close.
00:05:24.480 --> 00:05:28.240
And I remember we were both running late, actually.
00:05:28.480 --> 00:05:30.240
We both couldn't get a car park.
00:05:30.480 --> 00:05:39.759
And so because we were late, we got joined together in the connection part, and we really got chatting, really hit it off, and we then got breakfast together afterwards.
00:05:39.839 --> 00:05:40.879
And it was so beautiful.
00:05:40.959 --> 00:05:43.519
She said to me, You know, you manifested me, right?
00:05:43.759 --> 00:05:46.079
I was like, Yes, I actually did.
00:05:46.319 --> 00:05:47.279
She intuited it.
00:05:47.360 --> 00:05:50.480
She was like, Yeah, I'm never late to this, I'm never get don't get apart.
00:05:50.800 --> 00:05:55.439
We were meant to talk together, and yeah, she's just a beautiful soul sister.
00:05:55.680 --> 00:06:04.560
And so in that moment, these type of movements or businesses, it's so beautiful, like how the byproduct is of who comes together.
00:06:04.639 --> 00:06:06.480
And I really saw this at the retreat.
00:06:06.639 --> 00:06:11.120
One of the things I'm most proud of in my work is the people I draw in, the people I attract.
00:06:11.199 --> 00:06:18.959
And it's a common reflection I get from my clients and from the guests on retreat that, you know, it's beautiful, the people you attract.
00:06:19.120 --> 00:06:23.279
They've always been so beautiful, they've always connected the friendships that have been made.
00:06:23.439 --> 00:06:25.519
I had ones that they met up in Bali.
00:06:25.920 --> 00:06:32.720
I had ones now that they were all like, especially just in this retreat, they were all very close and instantly almost.
00:06:32.800 --> 00:06:35.360
It was just incredible to witness.
00:06:35.519 --> 00:06:45.759
And to be able to speak so deeply, skip all the small talk, be able to speak about things that maybe they were shameful about or that they were excited about that they felt like they couldn't share with the people around them.
00:06:46.000 --> 00:06:50.399
So this is a message to you to really cultivate the community if you're craving it.
00:06:50.560 --> 00:06:57.680
Also, as well, it's been such a beautiful byproduct of me just following my passion and following the things I enjoy that and following my intuition.
00:06:57.759 --> 00:07:06.480
My intuition guided me to that beach that day to do breath work and to be in that space, you know, to be in environments like that, it naturally will inspire you.
00:07:06.639 --> 00:07:12.319
It will naturally bring out creativity and that soul connection with people.
00:07:12.800 --> 00:07:20.079
So that was an experience that I had, and I really was grateful for Ryan for having created that space.
00:07:20.319 --> 00:07:28.959
And so whenever we have a desire, there's always that reciprocal energy, that outward ability to receive for your desire.
00:07:29.120 --> 00:07:33.519
So be open for what you're desiring and to create aligned action towards that.
00:07:33.759 --> 00:07:41.040
So if you're feeling a call for community or transformation or to just be around people with similar values, yeah, there's plenty of them.
00:07:41.279 --> 00:07:42.000
They are everywhere.
00:07:42.160 --> 00:07:44.879
And if not, go online, go into a community space.
00:07:44.959 --> 00:07:46.000
It's so important.
00:07:46.319 --> 00:07:48.639
We are wired for connection.
00:07:48.879 --> 00:07:51.199
Okay, let's go back to the conversation with Ryan.
00:07:51.439 --> 00:07:53.839
As I said, he created cool to be conscious.
00:07:54.240 --> 00:08:00.560
I think they're having like 3,000 people or something on a beach at one time, doing ice buffs and everything.
00:08:00.800 --> 00:08:03.040
Ryan's main modality is breath work.
00:08:03.199 --> 00:08:09.519
You know, your ability to just bypass the conscious mind and go to the subconscious, go to the true feeling.
00:08:09.680 --> 00:08:10.879
It's a powerful tool.
00:08:11.040 --> 00:08:11.920
I love breath work.
00:08:12.160 --> 00:08:13.920
I'm also a practitioner in breath work.
00:08:14.240 --> 00:08:26.639
I love to use it in combination with human design because human design is a lot about the conscious awareness, your conscious mind getting on board with what your body already knows and understanding your energetic aura and what you're here to give and do.
00:08:26.720 --> 00:08:28.160
But it's very mind-heady.
00:08:28.560 --> 00:08:37.759
Yes, we're connecting to the body, but I find that breath work bypasses all of that, goes straight into the body, is able to process, is able to give you answers that you're seeking.
00:08:37.840 --> 00:08:39.840
It's able to move the energy.
00:08:39.919 --> 00:08:51.759
You know, any emotion is energy emotion, so it's able to move that energy so it's no longer festering in there or no longer creating subconscious limiting beliefs or perpetuating or storing traumas.
00:08:52.000 --> 00:08:56.399
You know, this is Ryan's work that he does and trains practitioners as well in birth work.
00:08:56.639 --> 00:08:57.919
So enjoy this one.
00:08:58.080 --> 00:09:00.320
Thank you so much, Ryan, for coming on the show.
00:09:00.480 --> 00:09:03.759
I'll put all Ryan's links below, and thank you so much.
00:09:08.080 --> 00:09:11.200
Okay, well, welcome, welcome to the podcast.
00:09:11.360 --> 00:09:13.600
I have a very exciting guest here with me today.
00:09:13.679 --> 00:09:15.039
His name is Ryan Hubbard.
00:09:15.200 --> 00:09:17.360
He is the founder of Cool to Be Conscious.
00:09:17.519 --> 00:09:21.279
He is a teacher, a father, a partner, and a Kiwi.
00:09:21.759 --> 00:09:24.000
So I'm very excited to be chatting with you today.
00:09:24.080 --> 00:09:25.279
And thank you for joining me.
00:09:25.679 --> 00:09:26.399
Pleasure is mine.
00:09:26.480 --> 00:09:28.240
Um, I'm really looking forward to this conversation.
00:09:28.559 --> 00:09:35.279
Yeah, I first discovered Cool to Be Conscious when I actually returned to Australia after living overseas for a couple of years.
00:09:35.440 --> 00:09:44.399
And I remember it was a big thing in my I guess it was a manifestation that I wanted to have a conscious community when I returned.
00:09:44.480 --> 00:09:47.360
I definitely had a big spiritual journey once I left.
00:09:47.519 --> 00:09:56.720
And I always felt like it was lacking a little bit in Australia, and I was almost afraid to come back to Australia, even though my heart was so calling to come home.
00:09:56.960 --> 00:10:05.360
And I came to one of your events and as well the women that I met there and the men, but especially there was a few women that I'm still very close with today.
00:10:05.679 --> 00:10:15.360
And I feel like in such a world where we're just craving connection and community, is this, you know, is this your mission behind call to be conscious?
00:10:15.440 --> 00:10:17.759
I would just love to hear a bit more about what you're creating.
00:10:18.080 --> 00:10:20.000
Yeah, no, firstly, thanks for sharing that.
00:10:20.080 --> 00:10:21.360
And was it a no sir?
00:10:21.679 --> 00:10:22.720
No, it was in Gold Coast.
00:10:22.799 --> 00:10:23.200
Oh, was it?
00:10:23.360 --> 00:10:25.039
Yeah, when I first returned, I lived on the Gold Coast.
00:10:25.120 --> 00:10:25.519
Oh, amazing.
00:10:25.600 --> 00:10:26.159
Yeah, incredible.
00:10:26.399 --> 00:10:27.279
Yeah, no, for sure.
00:10:27.360 --> 00:10:31.919
Like the word connection is is really what encapsulates what the whole movement is about.
00:10:32.000 --> 00:10:36.080
And it's not just connection with other people, it's connection with yourself and remembering what that is.
00:10:36.559 --> 00:10:50.000
You know, like when I first started my journey of inquiring within a little bit more and and exploring my internal body, it was really scary and I felt almost alienated and different and separate from the friends that I was hanging out with.
00:10:50.240 --> 00:10:56.559
And then when values and things started to mismatch and there wasn't an alignment there, it became really lonely.
00:10:56.639 --> 00:10:56.879
Yeah.
00:10:57.039 --> 00:10:59.120
And I was like, where do I go?
00:10:59.200 --> 00:11:02.080
And who do I hang out with to talk about the stuff that I'm experiencing?
00:11:02.480 --> 00:11:16.240
And the only place or the only community that I could seek and see was the more so I'd say spiritually inclined and um immersed, separate from society.
00:11:16.399 --> 00:11:19.919
They were like very much living in community bush huts and stuff like that.
00:11:20.000 --> 00:11:21.840
And for me that was like really intimidating.
00:11:21.919 --> 00:11:30.240
You know, I come from I'd say a very conservative family, lived on a farm in New Zealand, and I couldn't see myself doing that or being what they were.
00:11:30.320 --> 00:11:32.799
And it was it for me brought up a lot of insecurity.
00:11:33.120 --> 00:11:37.039
Do I have to like leave my flat and buy a van and move into a bush community?
00:11:37.120 --> 00:11:41.279
So it was really nerve-wracking of what was next and what chapter of my life was next.
00:11:41.440 --> 00:11:50.799
So I wanted to create a community that brought in or invited people into that was not so separate from my normal.
00:11:51.120 --> 00:11:58.559
So I was like, how can I make this really digestible and approachable and somewhat attractive for people?
00:11:58.879 --> 00:12:03.600
Because there was such a a gap in space in between within spirituality and science.
00:12:03.759 --> 00:12:05.840
So I wanted to create a middle point.
00:12:05.919 --> 00:12:07.200
And that's really been the mission.
00:12:07.279 --> 00:12:14.240
It's like, how can I make this fun, cool, and digestible for the masses?
00:12:14.399 --> 00:12:16.960
And that's been the whole mission since I started essentially.
00:12:17.039 --> 00:12:20.799
Like, how can I create something that my old self would be interested in doing?
00:12:20.960 --> 00:12:30.399
The guy that was really judgmental, really anxious, very insecure and focused on drinking and alcohol culture in New Zealand.
00:12:30.480 --> 00:12:31.120
How can I get him?
00:12:31.200 --> 00:12:33.360
How can I catch that guy you know that I was?
00:12:33.519 --> 00:12:39.679
How can I make something that had a bit of spice to it and looked unique and looked fun and inviting?
00:12:39.759 --> 00:12:40.720
How can I get that guy?
00:12:40.879 --> 00:12:52.799
So that's been the whole, I would say, uh, mission is creating that and creating it from a place of my own experience and sharing from a place of knowing and embodiment in myself.
00:12:53.360 --> 00:12:54.879
And that's all I've really done.
00:12:55.039 --> 00:13:08.399
And since then it's been just a a really I'd say humbling journey and pretty profound journey, like watching the the manifestation of that vision or that that drive and that purpose to create that.
00:13:08.480 --> 00:13:13.919
And I didn't have intention or belief that it would be something that it is right now.
00:13:14.000 --> 00:13:19.840
You know, it started off with five friends and it just accentuated and here we are now, you know.
00:13:20.159 --> 00:13:23.360
3,000 people down on the wild.
00:13:23.519 --> 00:13:23.840
Yeah.
00:13:24.159 --> 00:13:27.600
But you can see that just like yourself, people are craving connection.
00:13:27.840 --> 00:13:28.000
Yeah.
00:13:28.080 --> 00:13:43.279
We live in such a digitally overpowered or overruled society where we're so focused on connecting online, growing our followers, having all of the engagement on comments and posts, and we're somewhat so we're at the mercy of that, you know.
00:13:43.440 --> 00:13:56.559
And I'm trying to create a positive spin with the online and social media world, but also bring people back to what we deeply crave at our core, which is to feel connected to people in the physical form.
00:13:57.039 --> 00:14:10.879
I feel we get spikes and false sense of that through our phones, but like nothing and come close to what we experience in person at these community events and people really feel the essence of what community is about.
00:14:11.519 --> 00:14:26.639
So yeah, I guess it's a quick intro into what our human need, it's our human not it beyond survival, but it's just we've almost kind of belittled that genuine essential trait as a human.
00:14:26.960 --> 00:14:44.639
And what I was loving, even just what you were sharing about, you know, speaking to the person that may not resonate fully with the hippie, and you know, and that was a big experience for me as well of okay, so I'm not feeling connected with where I am now, but there that feels so far away, and that also doesn't feel connected.
00:14:44.720 --> 00:14:45.759
So where is this middle point?
00:14:45.840 --> 00:14:51.200
And I feel like a lot of people can be in this almost limbo or this in-between of okay, well, I don't fit here anymore.
00:14:51.279 --> 00:14:59.200
This doesn't feel good, but this feels too out of realms, or it goes so against my conditioning or goes so against, you know, my belief system.
00:14:59.279 --> 00:15:06.320
And so what I do love what you were just sharing, it's like kind of coming to where people are at, and then in itself, that is also a beautiful space.
00:15:06.399 --> 00:15:07.679
Like it's not actually an in-between.
00:15:07.759 --> 00:15:08.720
This is a beautiful space.
00:15:08.879 --> 00:15:19.279
It doesn't have to be so polarizing different sides, and you don't need to go and be a Himalayan the monk, but you also can be aware of how your actions are affecting other people, you know?
00:15:19.440 --> 00:15:28.159
So I love how that I really feel that in your movement because it's made it approachable, as you said, but also very welcoming.
00:15:28.320 --> 00:15:28.559
Yeah.
00:15:28.720 --> 00:15:42.480
So I would love for you to please share as well what has been some of those experiences, either even just the Ryan that sits before me today, when you're looking back, is there any big experiences or big life moments that attribute to who you are now?
00:15:43.279 --> 00:15:44.799
Before, before the moment?
00:15:45.039 --> 00:15:46.559
I feel let's go one before, one after.
00:15:46.960 --> 00:15:47.919
Okay, okay, I like it.
00:15:48.159 --> 00:15:57.919
I'd say what first pops to mind with the before would be man, there's actually so many little moments, but I'd say, you know, the catalyst to the beginning of my journey would be a big one.
00:15:58.000 --> 00:16:04.320
You know, the moment that I realized I wasn't okay and that has changed the trajectory of my life.
00:16:04.399 --> 00:16:21.039
You know, I was in a crossroads there when I realized that when I first experienced one of the severest panic attacks that I'd experienced to the point where I had tetanine caused by temporary respiratory alkalosis in the blood, which is when you experience cramping in the hands from hyperventilating.
00:16:21.120 --> 00:16:26.480
And I experienced that and I could my hands were blue, apparently my face went blue, my lips went purp went purple.
00:16:26.960 --> 00:16:34.720
So in a in a very hypoxic state, so low oxygen levels in the in the blood and to the point where you know nearly nearly losing consciousness.
00:16:35.279 --> 00:16:39.519
In that moment, I I realized how not okay I was.
00:16:39.759 --> 00:16:46.320
I was like, there is something severely wrong with my my my body shouldn't be doing this and what it's doing right now, you know.
00:16:46.480 --> 00:16:53.120
And I always tried to oversee everything and not look into the things that were happening to my body.
00:16:53.200 --> 00:17:01.360
I was very disrespectful and neglectful to how my body was trying to talk and communicate with me for a really long time.
00:17:01.600 --> 00:17:06.480
And in that moment, I was like, oh no, I've got to start listening to this thing.
00:17:06.559 --> 00:17:10.720
Yeah, you know, I can't not, I can't not uh ignore this one.
00:17:11.039 --> 00:17:11.759
And it was big.
00:17:11.839 --> 00:17:26.240
I was in in front of my when when it happened, I was next to my best friend at the time, and it was just me and him, and we were on our way back from a music festival like three days after the festival, and clearly my body was run down and not keeping up with what I was putting it through.
00:17:26.480 --> 00:17:29.920
And I was on the ground in a car park, he'd pulled over.
00:17:30.079 --> 00:17:39.519
The panic attack was starting to come on whilst we were still moving in the van, and I started getting clammy in my hands, I started fidgeting, and I was just like, What am I doing?
00:17:39.599 --> 00:17:40.400
Why am I moving so much?
00:17:40.480 --> 00:17:43.759
And I was like, Oh my god, and I was like tap toe tapping, like, can you pull over?
00:17:43.839 --> 00:17:44.640
I need some fresh air.
00:17:44.720 --> 00:17:54.319
And by the time he pulled over, I was like paralyzed on the ground, hyperventilating, fully cramped up, turning blue, and we were under this, like it was actually like a really beautiful moment.
00:17:54.400 --> 00:17:56.000
I was under this huge tree.
00:17:56.240 --> 00:18:07.920
All I can remember seeing when I came out of this panic attack was the colours and the tree like kind of blowing in the wind, was so present, and then my best mate who was there just holding my hand.
00:18:08.319 --> 00:18:20.960
And in that moment I recognized how not okay I was, but I also gave myself permission to be capital V vulnerable, and I hadn't been vulnerable for since I could remember, and I just had tears flowing down my face.
00:18:21.440 --> 00:18:26.880
One, because I thought I was dying, I thought I was gone, and I thought in that moment this is it, um, you know, this is my life.
00:18:27.759 --> 00:18:37.839
And two, I had no other choice, you know, like the emotion was so prevalent and pressing on my system, I had to let it come through and the tears just started flowing like a river.
00:18:38.079 --> 00:18:54.480
And for my best mate, it was new, you know, he'd never seen me in that state before, and it was probably really uncomfortable for him to watch me, you know, someone that was usually you know the guy that was fun and stalwick and like and you know, strong and tough on the outside, tough shell.
00:18:54.799 --> 00:18:58.400
And yeah, that I think that for me was a huge catalyst for the beginning.
00:18:58.480 --> 00:18:59.839
I realized that something had to change.
00:18:59.920 --> 00:19:06.880
And that vulnerability came a lot of confronting sensations and emotions and our reflections as well.
00:19:06.960 --> 00:19:09.359
You know, I had the what do you do now?
00:19:09.440 --> 00:19:11.519
Yeah feelings, and was that too much?
00:19:11.680 --> 00:19:13.759
And is your best friend gonna like you now?
00:19:13.920 --> 00:19:15.839
And is he gonna tell people about this?
00:19:15.920 --> 00:19:18.480
And what are people gonna think about this when they hear?
00:19:18.640 --> 00:19:25.839
I was a bit of somewhat um social media influencer back then, you know, coming off the back of a reality TV show in New Zealand.
00:19:26.160 --> 00:19:26.319
Okay.
00:19:26.480 --> 00:19:30.400
I think that led to a lot of like social anxiety and pressure that I put on myself as well.
00:19:30.640 --> 00:19:32.960
So I was really scared that people were gonna find out.
00:19:33.119 --> 00:19:36.559
So in that moment was such like the polarity in it was crazy.
00:19:36.640 --> 00:19:40.720
I was like, I feel so free, and I feel like this is the beginning of m the new me.
00:19:40.880 --> 00:19:45.279
And also I was like, I'm so scared to be this vision of me, I don't really want to be here.
00:19:45.519 --> 00:19:49.359
So like the voices were so loud, I was like, hey, Brian, you're doing amazing.
00:19:49.440 --> 00:19:52.640
It's time to let go and become this person that you're meant to.
00:19:52.720 --> 00:19:57.279
And on the other end, it was like, no, you can't be in this world anymore because this is too scary.
00:19:57.359 --> 00:20:00.240
Like that ego essence of me was like, No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
00:20:00.480 --> 00:20:05.440
Yeah, the shame was like no no no no embarrassment for being vulnerable, for crying, having a panic attack.
00:20:05.680 --> 00:20:16.640
So it was scary, like I was being conflicted with these two voices, and essentially it led me to going back to my mum, yeah, you know, the great feminine in in my world.
00:20:16.720 --> 00:20:22.480
And so I was confused, I didn't know where to go, I didn't know how to seek help, I didn't know where to start, so went back to my mum.
00:20:22.640 --> 00:20:32.000
So I guess that was a a big pivotal moment in the journey that changed everything and the trajectory of who I was becoming and how my life panned out from there.
00:20:32.240 --> 00:20:36.480
It's amazing those moments where it's you can't, as we said, you can't ignore it anymore.
00:20:36.640 --> 00:20:38.319
Your body is screaming at you.
00:20:38.480 --> 00:20:52.640
I also had the panic attack experience as well, and it's almost this confrontation of I can't keep running away from myself, and it's just so in your body either when you're in a panic attack, even though you're so much going on, you can't be anywhere else.
00:20:53.279 --> 00:21:04.000
And um, you know, sadly I think it's a lot of people's experience that either they'll have that low-lying anxiety all the time, or they'll always be in that like that fear and the shame.
00:21:04.240 --> 00:21:05.759
So, yeah, thank you for sharing.
00:21:06.000 --> 00:21:06.960
No, thanks for listening.
00:21:07.359 --> 00:21:12.000
It's and as you mentioned, I I feel a lot of people experience these moments of of panic.
00:21:12.160 --> 00:21:23.279
And, you know, now with what I teach in terms of breath work and breathing, it's literally uh a great analogy or sign that you are breathing in a really dysfunctional manner in a way.
00:21:23.440 --> 00:21:30.640
And it's you know, it's funny to reflect now on the fact that what started my breathwork journey was hyperventilating and not having any breath.
00:21:30.720 --> 00:21:35.839
And now, you know, I have lots of breath and I have lots of access to the oxygen in the air that's here.
00:21:35.920 --> 00:21:38.640
I'm now hypoventilating, so breathing a lot less.
00:21:38.960 --> 00:21:40.160
So it's an interesting journey.
00:21:40.720 --> 00:21:52.240
Now, the to answer the second phase of that question, I feel a big shift was when I had um quite an esoteric energetic experience that made me believe I was having a heart attack.
00:21:53.039 --> 00:22:05.680
And it was so real and so cathartic and somatic that again it had been The same frame or state of being where I was when I was having the panic attack, I thought that that my life was over.
00:22:06.000 --> 00:22:08.960
And it shifted me in a way that I I struggled to articulate.
00:22:09.279 --> 00:22:19.839
But what I got from that experience the most was one, I need to mend every relationship and connection in my life that has untouched strings or there may be a negative charge towards.
00:22:20.400 --> 00:22:22.799
Because when I came back, I thought I was gone.
00:22:23.039 --> 00:22:24.400
And it was so odd.
00:22:24.640 --> 00:22:30.640
The first thing I thought of was like, I don't want anyone to feel negatively towards me when I die.
00:22:30.880 --> 00:22:42.000
And then that was it was so alive, and I was like, I need to do everything I can to mend any connection that I've had from school, from high school, through my early 20s.
00:22:42.079 --> 00:22:48.880
Like any woman I've mistreated, any men that I've mistreated, I need to reconnect with them and make sure that there's no negative charge.
00:22:49.119 --> 00:22:51.680
I need to have closure there with all of those connections.
00:22:51.759 --> 00:22:52.400
It was crazy.
00:22:52.480 --> 00:23:00.160
And I basically set out to that was my work to go and mend all of those potential connections that there was a negative charge towards.
00:23:00.319 --> 00:23:02.880
So I was like reaching out to girls that I dated or seen.
00:23:02.960 --> 00:23:05.440
I was like, hey, I just want to make sure that I didn't to mistreat you.
00:23:05.519 --> 00:23:06.720
And if I did, I'm so sorry.
00:23:06.799 --> 00:23:12.880
And I knew that I had to, like the old woman that I'd mistreated, and I was like, hey, look, I'm so sorry for the way that I treated you, you don't deserve that.
00:23:13.119 --> 00:23:14.000
And that was my work.
00:23:14.079 --> 00:23:15.759
I set out to just mend all of that.
00:23:15.920 --> 00:23:26.559
And it gave me such ease, like in my body, I realized that I was holding on to so much guilt within those dynamics and interactions that had taken place.
00:23:26.720 --> 00:23:27.519
And it was crazy.
00:23:27.759 --> 00:23:31.839
Even if it was just like a 10-second interaction and it was bad for me, like I had to mend it.
00:23:31.920 --> 00:23:32.240
Yeah.
00:23:32.559 --> 00:23:33.759
And I don't know.
00:23:33.839 --> 00:23:48.319
It it really changed the way that I I now interact with the world and the way that I I guess could heal the old aspects of me that were still living in the past that I was carrying along with me.
00:23:48.480 --> 00:23:50.079
Like I was still holding on to that guilt.
00:23:50.240 --> 00:23:57.200
Whether I consciously knew it or not, my body and subconscious were still holding on to a lot of the guilt that I had for those relationships.
00:23:57.519 --> 00:24:06.799
So that was a pivotal moment, and I feel it's changed the way that I now show up within the way that I teach and the way that I engage with people.
00:24:07.039 --> 00:24:22.160
I just I I need to make sure that I'm not leaving people in this feeling of resentment or anger or discomfort towards me because whether we know it or not, our body is receiving that energy and that like cord, that energetic cord between them to us.
00:24:22.319 --> 00:24:22.960
And I don't know.
00:24:23.119 --> 00:24:39.119
It was like when I thought I was dying and I was transitioning into the next phase of my existence, it was like I don't know whether the weight was too heavy on me or whether the essence of me, the spirit or the soul of me, whatever words you want to use, it knew that there was like still baggage there that I needed to clear out.
00:24:39.279 --> 00:24:41.279
It was crazy, it was really bizarre.
00:24:41.519 --> 00:24:51.839
But that was one of the biggest things that came through from that moment, and also what came through was the fact that I needed to surrender to the love that my partner was trying to share with me.
00:24:52.240 --> 00:25:01.599
There was a part of me that was still really nervous to receive her love and scared to be hurt, scared to to lose the love that was available and ready for me.
00:25:01.759 --> 00:25:03.119
And that was big.
00:25:03.200 --> 00:25:08.079
I was like, man, I've been with her for I'd had had been with her for over two and a half years.
00:25:08.240 --> 00:25:20.400
And in that moment when I came back from that experience, I was like, I've blocked her out, like in a way where I thought I was open, there was still part of me that was so closed off to going deeper into her love and really receiving it.
00:25:20.480 --> 00:25:25.680
So I was like, man, I was really avoiding to receive her fully.
00:25:25.839 --> 00:25:27.119
So that was big.
00:25:27.279 --> 00:25:29.519
So I guess those two beautiful.
00:25:29.759 --> 00:25:35.119
What I'm hearing as well, it's just like you really feeling called in your integrity and your intention.
00:25:35.200 --> 00:25:39.599
It sounds like very intentional now of how you're connecting, who you're connecting with.
00:25:39.759 --> 00:25:42.880
Do you feel like there's it now a pressure there around that?
00:25:43.279 --> 00:25:48.720
In a way of because inevitably people are gonna have or misunderstand you.
00:25:48.880 --> 00:25:53.680
Inevitably, they are, you're gonna inevitably let people down, or you can't make everyone happy.
00:25:53.839 --> 00:25:55.039
Do you ever feel pressure around that?
00:25:55.200 --> 00:25:57.200
Especially as a man, I can imagine, would be for sure.
00:25:57.359 --> 00:25:57.519
Yeah.
00:25:57.759 --> 00:26:26.400
Yeah, I guess there's the difference that I'm that I'd like to speak into is you know, like I would if I'm conscious and aware of myself, and I am in in most moments, I'm not going to partake in the exchange that I used to, and I would have let myself partake in, whether that's confrontation when I lose control over the energy in my body and I'll shout at somebody, or a classic example was that people would cut me off in traffic, I'd be the guy that'd be like, Oh, what are you doing, mate?
00:26:26.480 --> 00:26:28.319
And I'd engage in that energy.
00:26:28.559 --> 00:26:37.440
Whereas now I have the ability to choose in those moments how I'm gonna interact and how I'm gonna respond in those moments of and I'd say confrontation.
00:26:37.759 --> 00:26:39.359
There's always gonna be confrontation in life.
00:26:39.440 --> 00:26:47.599
Like life will put challenges and question marks in front of you and essentially test you with how you're gonna show up in this moment.
00:26:47.680 --> 00:26:50.319
Like, how are you gonna choose to engage with this right now?
00:26:50.480 --> 00:26:55.359
Are you gonna go to that version of you or are you gonna choose to stay in control and conscious awareness here?
00:26:55.519 --> 00:27:00.160
So in those moments, I'm checking in and I'm very much rounded and centered a lot more.
00:27:00.400 --> 00:27:01.359
I love what you said.
00:27:01.519 --> 00:27:10.240
We're we're always going to trigger somebody, we're always gonna make somebody feel uncomfortable, and that's just that's inevitable, and that's what the truth brings.
00:27:10.400 --> 00:27:19.759
Like the truth, or your truth or my truth is gonna be different in accordance to our own perceptions and beliefs and environment and the way that we're brought up and told and taught.
00:27:20.079 --> 00:27:25.839
But fundamentally, we're always going to trigger someone with anything that we say.
00:27:26.000 --> 00:27:28.480
No doubt, even talking about panic attacks, it's gonna trigger something.
00:27:28.799 --> 00:27:32.000
I know, I haven't even thought of it at the end of it when I said the thing about the low-lying anxiety.
00:27:32.079 --> 00:27:33.119
I was like, that was 100%.
00:27:33.359 --> 00:27:39.839
Yeah, you're just because we all have it, yeah, and and we're all gonna be part of that experience of being triggered and being activated.
00:27:40.000 --> 00:27:49.119
And you know, I now see triggers as blessings and opportunities to to grow and evolve inside, and I look forward to those moments that I'm triggered now.
00:27:49.279 --> 00:28:12.240
I think that the difference in me consciously going through an experience and causing someone to be like, I don't like that guy, and I like I've got something against that guy, isn't gonna come from me sharing a truth, it's gonna come from me going like pulling the birdie at somebody or cutting someone off in traffic or saying something personalized to that person that I know that is gonna really upset them.
00:28:12.480 --> 00:28:15.359
Whereas I'm just not gonna do that, you know, I don't do that anymore.
00:28:15.440 --> 00:28:17.599
That's a waste of my energy, it's a waste of my time.
00:28:17.839 --> 00:28:19.759
So I guess that's the separation that I want to create.
00:28:20.400 --> 00:28:28.400
What I'm hearing from you, it's it also needs to be in alignment with you as yourself because I think there is that propensity, especially I know a lot of women, it's like they must like me.
00:28:28.480 --> 00:28:29.519
I must make sure that I'm pleasing.
00:28:29.599 --> 00:28:33.519
I must, and it's kind of that's a very different energy of that's people pleasing energy.
00:28:33.680 --> 00:28:33.920
100%.
00:28:34.240 --> 00:28:34.960
And that's very different.
00:28:35.039 --> 00:28:38.400
But what I'm hearing from you, it's now I'm in alignment with myself, in my integrity.
00:28:38.559 --> 00:28:45.359
And then I'm also extremely mindful of how my actions affect the others and what energy am I creating in this world?
00:28:45.519 --> 00:28:48.720
You know, it's like energy of anger or energy of suffering.
00:28:48.880 --> 00:28:58.480
I even recently was thinking this, even if you're suffering in the job you love, like even in your movement, that's still creating energy of suffering in the world, even if it's for a higher purpose.
00:28:58.720 --> 00:29:01.279
So it's all just a choice with that.
00:29:01.599 --> 00:29:02.400
Absolutely.
00:29:02.720 --> 00:29:04.960
And how yeah, there's levels to that, eh?
00:29:05.200 --> 00:29:20.319
Yeah, yeah, you know, and there's levels to that in the way of we becoming aware of ourselves and choosing ourselves in and in moments and being authentic is great, but also we're living in a society where we're engaging and interacting and communicating with people.
00:29:20.559 --> 00:29:34.000
So the example I'm gonna use is you go to the beach, you've finished your beach, you're now like in your car, you're getting changed, and there's someone lining up for your car park, sitting there with the indicator on, and there's like cars piling up behind them.
00:29:34.240 --> 00:29:37.839
You going, no, I'm choosing to stay in my body.
00:29:38.000 --> 00:29:46.079
I'm gonna take my time, I'm gonna dry myself, I'm gonna do my routine, I'm gonna make sure the music's on, I'm gonna brush my hair, and then I'm gonna pull out.
00:29:46.160 --> 00:29:50.880
You know, that in conjunction with, okay, I know that there's a car waiting for me.
00:29:50.960 --> 00:29:52.480
All right, I'm gonna speed up a little bit.
00:29:52.559 --> 00:29:56.079
I'm gonna throw my routine out of the window just because I know that there's someone waiting for me.
00:29:56.240 --> 00:29:58.880
I'm gonna be respectful of this other human that's waiting.
00:29:59.039 --> 00:30:00.079
That's different, you know?
00:30:00.240 --> 00:30:03.039
Whereas there's like, there's people that are like, no, I'm doing my own thing.
00:30:03.119 --> 00:30:08.240
And I'm like, I'm gonna be me right now and I'm not gonna worry about you because I'm over here living my best life.
00:30:08.960 --> 00:30:24.000
I used to do that, you know, and I was like, hang on a minute, I'm actually like disconnecting myself from the world and those people that are there waiting for the car park or waiting in line for the coffee, or like, hey, I can see that there's a mother here with a child behind me on the line.
00:30:24.079 --> 00:30:31.440
I'm gonna let that person go first because I have the awareness to recognize that she's got a baby to look after, she's got other things going on.
00:30:31.519 --> 00:30:37.119
Like, I've got time here right now, rather than go, no, it's my turn to, you know, it's just like righteousness.
00:30:37.279 --> 00:30:39.039
Yeah, that is such a good analogy.
00:30:39.119 --> 00:30:52.559
And I always I have a joke with my friend how there is two types of people the ones that will just like really slowly cross the pedestrian line or really slowly do that, do the parking, or there's the ones that it's like quickly out, quickly in because they're noticing.
00:30:52.640 --> 00:30:59.200
And yeah, it is you know, this just awareness of the ripple on effect always.
00:30:59.519 --> 00:31:07.680
And again, like this, even when it comes to your business, how have you found like leading from this heart space, leading from is well to those listening?
00:31:07.759 --> 00:31:09.279
He's a three-five generator.
00:31:09.599 --> 00:31:31.759
Um, with that gut, you know, I think sometimes even when you were saying about the two experiences when your first that panic attack when you were with your friend, that experience of like, okay, my heart, my gut, my whole body is saying one thing, then the mind and the shame and the ego, how do you find that within business of leading from that intuitive space?
00:31:32.480 --> 00:31:33.039
It's hard.
00:31:33.200 --> 00:31:33.440
Yeah.
00:31:33.599 --> 00:31:34.400
Like it's hard.
00:31:34.480 --> 00:31:44.240
It's hard because if you do not honor like what your gut is saying and what your body's signaling to you, it just starts to get louder and more powerful and more painful for you.
00:31:44.400 --> 00:31:57.039
So acting on those intuitive feelings and also acting on those truths that you may see in somebody, or when you see actions that are out of alignment, and to give to be completely transparent.
00:31:57.119 --> 00:32:05.440
Like I've had to ask a couple of people to step away from the close circle of C to B C because actions weren't in alignment and integrity with values.
00:32:05.599 --> 00:32:09.599
And it's hard to have those really truthful, hard conversations.
00:32:09.680 --> 00:32:11.039
Like, it's not easy.
00:32:11.279 --> 00:32:28.480
And what is easier is to people please and to be like, ah, so they you know they'll change, they'll get better, but to have those really truthful, hard, challenging conversations is what's needed for their own evolution, their growth, and also for you to honor your integrity and it's a practice, yeah.
00:32:28.559 --> 00:32:33.359
You know, it's a practice that I've continued to trust in and and grow in.
00:32:33.519 --> 00:32:41.920
At the beginning, I used to be a lot more, I'd say, passive and feminine when it comes to leadership, but I'm now like, especially with a baby, I'm like, I don't have fucking time.
00:32:42.240 --> 00:32:47.119
Excuse my language, like I don't have time to like people please and be okay with this if it's out of alignment.
00:32:47.279 --> 00:32:48.960
I've got to keep moving, you know.
00:32:49.200 --> 00:32:52.720
So like I think that's been an energy that shifted in me since being a dad.
00:32:52.880 --> 00:32:57.680
It's like I've got no time to invest in this friendship anymore.
00:32:57.839 --> 00:33:00.960
I've got no time to be a part of that group anymore, I've got no time for that.
00:33:01.279 --> 00:33:18.880
Because when I was just with Jess, when we're just together and I didn't have a baby to look after, I had more time on my hands, I could somewhat compromise and be like, no, we'll go, we'll make it fun ourselves, even though we're not super aligned with that group, we'll just go and you know, make it make it fun for us and we'll make the most of it.
00:33:19.039 --> 00:33:20.799
But now I'm like, no, it's a hard no.
00:33:20.880 --> 00:33:29.039
I'd rather invest my time and energy in things that are really in alignment and in people that are really in alignment with who I am and and the values and stuff that I share.
00:33:29.119 --> 00:33:33.200
And also that are on the same wavelength, you know, they won't compromise anymore.
00:33:33.440 --> 00:33:42.319
Yeah, it's even what you were just saying about being intentional and also as well in integrity with you of okay, well, why would I be forcing or prioritizing this when you know?
00:33:42.640 --> 00:33:43.519
I got other stuff to do.
00:33:43.680 --> 00:33:44.000
Yeah.
00:33:44.160 --> 00:33:44.400
Yeah.
00:33:46.960 --> 00:33:48.480
100% others.
00:33:48.720 --> 00:33:53.200
Um, you mentioned guilt, and I wanted to speak into this kind of someone very close to me, my sister.
00:33:53.359 --> 00:33:57.680
It's her first place that she'll go to when any shame or any doubt is to guilt.
00:33:57.839 --> 00:34:08.880
And how have you moved through or been able to reconcile or continue to reconcile when that feeling or that emotion is it emotion?
00:34:09.119 --> 00:34:10.559
Yeah, comes up in your body.
00:34:10.880 --> 00:34:12.079
Yeah, definitely emotion, you know.
00:34:12.320 --> 00:34:12.480
Yeah.
00:34:12.960 --> 00:34:15.119
Guilt and shame are the are the twoest.
00:34:15.519 --> 00:34:20.320
I'd say dense and heavy and low vibration emotions that we can experience as a human.
00:34:20.400 --> 00:34:28.480
So anyone that's holding on to guilt or shame, like the detrimental effects that it has on your system and your health is it's unthinkable.
00:34:29.039 --> 00:34:29.599
It's a lot.
00:34:29.760 --> 00:34:36.159
And to process guilt and shame like has to be it has to be a somatic release, like it has to come out of your body.
00:34:36.239 --> 00:34:38.400
And guilt and shame usually sits around the hip area.
00:34:38.639 --> 00:34:45.039
That's why we see a lot of manifestation of people with lower back issues, pain in the lower hip region, this area.
00:34:45.119 --> 00:34:46.960
It's a manifestation of shame and guilt.
00:34:47.360 --> 00:34:53.920
And most of us, if not everyone, has had a shameful or experience where they hold guilt on themselves for.
00:34:54.079 --> 00:35:13.440
And like that practice of compassion and forgiveness for self, I would say is one of the most challenging and hard shifts to go through, especially when we become aware of ourselves and we go, oh man, all those things that I used to do were so off and so out, and the way that I treated such and such was so out.
00:35:13.679 --> 00:35:26.559
And to be able to go, rather than holding on to guilt and shame for that version of you, it's a matter of going back into the sensations of or going into the body, checking in and going, like, what am I holding on to right now?
00:35:26.639 --> 00:35:27.840
Like, how does that feel in my body?
00:35:27.920 --> 00:35:35.920
If I put myself in those scenarios and situations of what I was going through, and your body remembers everything, like it'll feel the way that it feels about that scenario.
00:35:36.079 --> 00:35:48.880
And then when you start to attune yourself to those sensations, it's a matter of letting your body amplify those sensations and follow it as it grows and grows, and it'll come to some form of release and expression.
00:35:49.280 --> 00:35:59.599
And we, you know, this is what I teach in Shear about somatic expression, somatic healing, somatic processing, and usually it's released in the form of a squeeze or a tense or a shake.
00:35:59.760 --> 00:36:06.400
So anyone listening right now, that's you're probably naturally attuning yourself to the way that you feel in your body right now, and anyone can do this.
00:36:06.639 --> 00:36:10.800
But track the sensations that are arising or that are most alive in your body right now.
00:36:10.880 --> 00:36:14.000
And we can all do this, we can practice any day and any moment.
00:36:14.159 --> 00:36:21.440
Just soften your gaze and close your eyes and just ask your body, what does it need to communicate or what sensation does it need to feel right now?
00:36:21.679 --> 00:36:28.239
And your body is so intelligent, it'll show you exactly where in the body that area is for you.
00:36:28.400 --> 00:36:33.360
And most of us will feel the sensation predominantly around the chest area, solar plexus area.
00:36:33.519 --> 00:36:37.760
That's where like the nervous energy comes from, that's where the anxiety starts to build and store.
00:36:38.159 --> 00:36:53.280
So when we find that sensation, we can usually ask it to show itself or reveal itself a little bit more, and just having a dialogue and communicating with it, we can invite more of it forward and explaining that it's safe to feel that sensation and it's safe to allow it to come through.
00:36:53.360 --> 00:37:00.480
Like if you feel safe in the environment that you're in, and let it build up and let it build up and let it build up, and then let it start to express itself.
00:37:00.559 --> 00:37:05.199
And usually that's in the form of a tear or the expression might need to shake itself out.
00:37:05.360 --> 00:37:17.679
Like ask what it needs, ask your body what it needs, put yourself in an environment where you can go through that process, do the thing, and then revisit that place in your body and just talk with it, speak with it.
00:37:17.840 --> 00:37:25.039
And usually, 99% of the time, that part of you is just nervous, fearful, or scared of what's coming forth in the future.
00:37:25.199 --> 00:37:30.639
It's a part of you that's being designed to protect you, and that's essentially how the body and nervous system works.
00:37:30.719 --> 00:37:32.800
Like we're built to survive, we're built to evolve.
00:37:33.039 --> 00:37:43.599
So communicating next time with that part of you that starts to arise, having a dialogue with that is really supportive for moving forward and being able to control when that sensation starts to grow again.
00:37:43.760 --> 00:37:47.519
Just checking in and being like, hey, we're all good right now, we're all good, we're okay.
00:37:47.679 --> 00:37:50.639
But when you get through this experience, I've got you, you know.
00:37:50.719 --> 00:37:55.679
And I don't know if you're familiar with parts work, but we've got parts of ourselves that are still, you know, latching on.
00:37:55.760 --> 00:37:58.800
That is just a younger version of us looking to survive and protect.
00:37:59.039 --> 00:38:02.639
So yeah, that's just more practice to check in and feel the body more.
00:38:02.880 --> 00:38:06.880
Yeah, I love how you just combine the somatic and the parts work because you're speaking, I loved that.
00:38:07.039 --> 00:38:20.320
And you know, because sometimes it can feel, and I know from my personal experience and from people that have shared with me, it is this feeling that it can feel so overwhelming, or it can be so big.
00:38:20.400 --> 00:38:24.960
It's I have this thing that happened, or I have this guilt around this thing, and it's okay, I'll just push it back.
00:38:25.119 --> 00:38:29.119
And as you said, it grows and it festers, or it just stays in the body.
00:38:29.199 --> 00:38:44.239
And like, um, I think that's a quote that the organs of the body holds tears that were never shed by the eyes, and just seeing that it just wants to be felt, just wants to be attended to, it just wants to know that you're safe because it's just trying to protect you because it thinks it's a bad person.
00:38:44.400 --> 00:38:48.480
So all of a sudden, every time you have a spare moment, it will just be an intrusive thought.
00:38:48.719 --> 00:38:57.119
Just to, you know, that's because there can be this belief of like if I don't hold on to this guilt, then I'll be a bad I'll you know, I'm a bad person then.
00:38:57.199 --> 00:38:57.440
Yeah.
00:38:57.599 --> 00:39:05.840
And so just this freedom that it can, and you just coming with full acceptance, full forgiveness, and feeling actually brave enough.
00:39:06.159 --> 00:39:07.119
Processing it, processing it.
00:39:07.440 --> 00:39:07.760
Absolutely.
00:39:07.840 --> 00:39:15.039
And then there's a quote that goes along this the lines of we're doing our best in the circumstances that we're provided with the awareness that we have, and it's so true.
00:39:15.119 --> 00:39:18.000
You know, we're always doing our best, no matter where we're at in our journey.
00:39:18.239 --> 00:39:23.519
So compassion and acceptance for who we were and who we once were is so key.
00:39:23.679 --> 00:39:26.880
Otherwise, we just drag that version of ourselves all the way to the grave.
00:39:26.960 --> 00:39:30.400
Yeah, and we go, oh man, like I I didn't need to drag that along.
00:39:30.480 --> 00:39:33.119
I didn't need to feel so guilty about that experience.
00:39:33.199 --> 00:39:34.000
I could have let that go.
00:39:34.079 --> 00:39:40.800
I could have actually what I did, I took it to the next level is I reached out to all those people and I I felt as though that was what I had to do.
00:39:41.039 --> 00:39:44.480
But you don't need to do that, you can actually forgive yourself and go through that process.
00:39:44.639 --> 00:39:48.239
But if you want to take it to the next level and check in with them, you can also do that.
00:39:48.320 --> 00:39:53.599
I had a lot of closure and there was a lot of closure from their sides of the experiences as well.
00:39:53.679 --> 00:39:55.760
And most of them were like, hey, I kind of remember that.
00:39:55.840 --> 00:39:56.800
It's all good, man.
00:39:56.960 --> 00:40:01.199
But a few of them were like, hey, this actually made me feel so seen and understood.
00:40:01.519 --> 00:40:02.960
And thank you.
00:40:03.199 --> 00:40:06.960
So, like, yeah, if you want to take it to the next level, do it and reach out.
00:40:07.199 --> 00:40:13.920
Yeah, I had an experience where she kept on visiting me in my dreams, someone that had had a, you know, in high school, we'd heard a falling out.
00:40:14.079 --> 00:40:16.880
Yeah, don't even remember what happened now, but it always kind of hung around.
00:40:16.960 --> 00:40:20.400
I used to always think, I wonder how she is, I wonder how she's going.
00:40:20.559 --> 00:40:24.800
And I remember, yeah, she started appearing in my dreams, coming, we're visiting each other.
00:40:24.960 --> 00:40:28.000
Yeah, and I just sent her a message and it was a beautiful exchange.
00:40:28.159 --> 00:40:34.880
And then, you know, then it feels, you know, we can't control how the other person's experience will be around it.
00:40:34.960 --> 00:40:39.280
It's similar to how you're saying, you just come knowing that you're coming with positive intent, how they respond.
00:40:39.519 --> 00:40:41.199
If they want to not respond, beautiful.
00:40:41.280 --> 00:40:42.639
That's also that's up to them.
00:40:42.800 --> 00:40:43.840
So thank you for sharing that.
00:40:44.000 --> 00:40:45.280
Yeah, my pleasure.
00:40:45.599 --> 00:40:49.039
So, how has been the journey moving into fatherhood?
00:40:49.519 --> 00:40:50.400
I don't know where to start.
00:40:50.480 --> 00:40:53.599
It's been the most it's been the most enlightening journey.
00:40:53.760 --> 00:41:07.519
And that word comes to mind because there were so many things that I was unaware of when I wasn't a dad and I wasn't a father, and and now I have such new perspectives, and I'm now able to see things so differently.
00:41:07.599 --> 00:41:13.920
And the way that I engage with the world is different, the way that I engage with my partner is different, the way that I engage with myself is different.
00:41:14.559 --> 00:41:20.400
Man, like it's a quest, like it's not a journey, like it's a full quest that I don't think will finish or end.
00:41:20.880 --> 00:41:22.639
There's no destination with it.
00:41:22.719 --> 00:41:25.519
But what comes to mind the most is her presence.
00:41:25.920 --> 00:41:28.159
Like, she's just slowed me down so much.
00:41:28.800 --> 00:41:31.519
And priorities are a big one.
00:41:31.599 --> 00:41:44.159
Like, you know, I thought my purpose and reason to be on this planet was to build a community and to help the ascension of consciousness through individuals, through community breathwork sessions, through the events that we run.
00:41:44.400 --> 00:41:46.000
I was like, that's it, that's why I'm here.
00:41:46.079 --> 00:41:46.960
You know, that's why I'm here.
00:41:47.039 --> 00:41:48.000
And I was convinced.
00:41:48.159 --> 00:41:52.480
I said to Jess, my partner, when we first started seeing each other, I was like, babe, I love you.
00:41:53.039 --> 00:41:56.800
But C to B C call to be conscious, my mission is number one priority.
00:41:56.960 --> 00:42:00.079
You know, in the moment she was like, you know, meh.
00:42:00.239 --> 00:42:04.320
But deep down she was like, No, I I love that in a man, and and that attracts me to a man.
00:42:04.480 --> 00:42:04.800
Very much.
00:42:05.039 --> 00:42:08.800
But now, since having Florence, I'm like, what do you mean your mission is called?
00:42:09.280 --> 00:42:22.239
Your mission is to be a dad and to be the best dad you can be, and to I would say lead and embody the practices and your teachings and show that through the way that you're a father, and that is more important and most important than any of your business stuff.
00:42:22.400 --> 00:42:24.480
Your business is so secondary now to that.
00:42:24.880 --> 00:42:28.000
Family, Florence, my partner, number one.
00:42:28.320 --> 00:42:30.320
So that's created a big shift in me.
00:42:30.400 --> 00:42:34.639
And the energetics behind that with business, like those that are listening, has been profound.
00:42:34.880 --> 00:42:38.960
One, because I've taken pressure off my business.
00:42:39.199 --> 00:42:40.480
I've taken pressure off it.
00:42:40.559 --> 00:42:44.559
I'm less in that forceful energy of like no, it doesn't, it doesn't matter.
00:42:44.800 --> 00:42:47.440
You know, it's like just a fun thing now that I do as a hobby.
00:42:47.599 --> 00:42:54.960
So the pressure that I've taken off from an energetic standpoint has really enabled the business to thrive and evolve this year.
00:42:55.039 --> 00:42:57.199
It's been crazy to watch the energetics behind it.
00:42:57.360 --> 00:42:58.400
And the ego doesn't like that.
00:42:58.480 --> 00:43:00.880
The ego thinks, no, I have to be in control of everything.
00:43:00.960 --> 00:43:04.559
I have to make, you know, and I have to be, and you're just you're seeing it.
00:43:04.719 --> 00:43:05.519
Yeah, absolutely.
00:43:05.760 --> 00:43:06.320
Yeah, powerful.
00:43:06.719 --> 00:43:18.800
She's really, Lawrence, she's really brought me back to center and back to I'd say the the purest why of human existence to create family and to build connection between each other.
00:43:19.039 --> 00:43:20.400
The mirror is so strong.
00:43:20.480 --> 00:43:25.679
You know, like we we spent Jess and I spent four days after birth just in tears crying.
00:43:25.760 --> 00:43:28.639
Like the oxytocin was so strong.
00:43:28.800 --> 00:43:31.920
It was and you know, I've been in the space for a while.
00:43:32.000 --> 00:43:43.760
I've worked with parents, I've worked with so many different people, and with breath work, I educate people on what's happening from a chemical standpoint in the body, we release oxytocin, we feel this euphoria after breathwork experiences.
00:43:43.920 --> 00:43:49.920
And I had somewhat an understanding or a perception of what I would feel through the birth process with Florence.
00:43:50.000 --> 00:43:56.719
So I was kind of stitching myself up because the more that we concentrate on something, the more that it gets further away from us in a way.
00:43:56.960 --> 00:44:05.920
So I had this perception and I'd put Pressure on this experience that it was going to be euphoric and powerful and make me feel drunk and intoxicated.
00:44:06.079 --> 00:44:10.800
I put all the pressure on the birth, you know, and I come to it, and I was like, Oh, this stuff's gonna happen.
00:44:11.039 --> 00:44:15.440
And you know, even though I was putting so much pressure on it, it blew me away tenfold.
00:44:15.519 --> 00:44:16.800
It blew me out of the park.
00:44:16.880 --> 00:44:24.239
Like I was like in paralysis with the love and oxytocin that was coming, and I'd never experienced anything like that before in my life.
00:44:24.639 --> 00:44:32.880
The power of those sensations were just like incredible, like undeniably the most powerful thing I've ever experienced in my life.
00:44:33.039 --> 00:44:42.320
Like the love that you can experience through that experience with your daughter or your son through your partner, like undeniably profound.
00:44:42.400 --> 00:44:50.639
And it lasted for four days, and it got to the point where Jess and I started to feel like really vulnerable, and there's like almost sickness of vulnerability, and it was scary.
00:44:50.719 --> 00:44:54.639
It got to like a point where it was quite scary because every time we'd lock eyes, there would just be tears.
00:44:54.880 --> 00:44:56.960
Just be like, woof, tears, woof, tears.
00:44:57.039 --> 00:44:58.639
Look at Florence, woof, tears.
00:44:58.800 --> 00:45:01.039
And it lasted for yeah, four or five days.
00:45:01.280 --> 00:45:02.960
I was like, is this gonna slow down?
00:45:03.119 --> 00:45:07.920
And then music, like everything was just transmitting and hitting our body and at a whole new level.
00:45:08.079 --> 00:45:13.199
Like the first song I listened to after this experience was Fat Freddy's Drop and 10 feet tall.
00:45:13.280 --> 00:45:16.639
And it's like the words and the lyrics were like hitting me, and I was crying.
00:45:16.719 --> 00:45:18.320
I was like, what is happening?
00:45:18.559 --> 00:45:23.039
But it's exploded the heart open, and I truly believe capacity, it's just you can hold more.
00:45:23.199 --> 00:45:25.519
You can hold more, and I I truly believe that's our natural state.
00:45:25.920 --> 00:45:32.079
We're that open to the world, we're that sensitive to the world, and we can feel everything to its fullest potential, and truest potential.
00:45:32.159 --> 00:45:36.719
I feel that we're operating at a really numb, yeah, dumbed down vibrational standpoint.
00:45:36.800 --> 00:45:39.119
And yeah, window of tolerance, small.
00:45:39.199 --> 00:45:46.239
And and when you're cracked open like that through experiences like birth, you remember what our potential is to feel as a human being.
00:45:46.400 --> 00:45:54.000
And it's the message that I share and continually transmit through our community is we're here to become more sensitive again.
00:45:54.159 --> 00:46:01.599
We're here to remember how connected we can be to people, to music, to our environment, to the world, to nature.
00:46:01.760 --> 00:46:06.559
We're we're here to to come back to that, you know, and the whole process of coming through some of the work that we do.
00:46:06.719 --> 00:46:21.119
It's unraveling the armor, defense systems in the nervous system, and reopening ourselves to the world so we can feel an experience like that because a lot of us are numb, we feel disconnected from our body, we feel disconnected from the world, and we struggle to feel a part of it.
00:46:21.360 --> 00:46:31.519
And I I I truly believe that a big reason for that is because we become so numb through the foods that we eat, the stuff that we listen to, the people that we hang out with, and all the toxins in our environment.
00:46:31.599 --> 00:46:45.119
You know, there's a whole lot, but the biggest thing I feel is the emotional closeness and the closing off of the heart that we all put on ourselves from hurt, from pain, from grief, from heartache, through relationships, through family.
00:46:45.280 --> 00:46:50.719
We all close down because we're so scared to feel that pain again from the love that we felt once before.
00:46:51.199 --> 00:46:57.679
So it's like a remembering and an unraveling of our heart to come back open to the world, to feel and experience it.
00:46:57.760 --> 00:47:06.719
But it's a double-bladed sword because it's inevitably gonna hurt again one day if we do open ourselves back up to relationships, to family, to friends, to the world.
00:47:06.960 --> 00:47:14.800
And that's the process, that's a practice to trust in yourself and to trust in your art again and communicate with it that it's okay, we can open back up.
00:47:14.960 --> 00:47:22.239
We can, and it is gonna hurt again one day, but let's just open up right now and remember how much there is to feel and experience in the world.
00:47:22.719 --> 00:47:29.440
It sounds like it almost was this heart opening with Jess, and then it was like, and then the three of you, it was then again expanded.
00:47:29.760 --> 00:47:30.239
Levels.
00:47:30.559 --> 00:47:36.880
So I feel obviously life can, as you said, it can be scary to live from that place.
00:47:37.199 --> 00:47:38.400
And I'm feeling called to ask this.
00:47:38.480 --> 00:47:41.760
What would be your advice, especially because most of the people listening will be women?
00:47:42.239 --> 00:47:47.599
How can they support their men or see that this is possible and available for them?
00:47:48.159 --> 00:48:00.639
Because again, I know women also struggle with this, but I think I can see from a lot of my clients like I would love my husband to be able to even learn about his human design, like his basic, or to be able to practice meditation a little bit.
00:48:00.800 --> 00:48:02.400
What's your words with that?
00:48:02.719 --> 00:48:05.760
That's one of the questions that I continually ask and I get the most.
00:48:05.840 --> 00:48:11.440
Yeah, women wanting their men to step into the space and to evolve and grow.
00:48:11.519 --> 00:48:19.679
And you know, I always share this in a bit of a comedic way of a funny way that women are so much more evolved than men, like full stop.
00:48:19.760 --> 00:48:25.199
Like women are a lot more connected to their bodies, they're a lot more intuitive, they're a lot more sensitive.
00:48:25.360 --> 00:48:29.519
And us as men are like, I truly believe we're 200 years behind in the evolution.
00:48:29.599 --> 00:48:35.199
We're just so stubborn and contracted and stuck in our ways, and we don't want change and we don't want to be vulnerable.
00:48:35.360 --> 00:48:46.159
And it's I heard something that who knows what this even is, but it was like for a woman to be born, she has to have had a few past lives as a man, but a man is never a man's fresh, it doesn't matter.
00:48:46.320 --> 00:48:47.920
He says have a new run, mate, it's good.
00:48:48.239 --> 00:48:48.400
Yeah.
00:48:48.719 --> 00:48:49.280
I hear that.
00:48:49.360 --> 00:48:50.480
And like I agree.
00:48:50.639 --> 00:48:59.440
It's it's hard, you know, and as a man, I th I feel we've been so distorted with what we perceive to be as a good man.
00:48:59.519 --> 00:49:12.719
Like we've forgotten what a woman truly desires in a man, and we've been told that it's all of the I would say it's all of the support through finance, and it's the house, and it's the toys, and it's the car, and it's the purse.
00:49:12.960 --> 00:49:14.639
And it's so not any of that.
00:49:14.719 --> 00:49:18.719
It's actually to feel safe in its essence, it's to feel safe.
00:49:19.039 --> 00:49:23.679
And it's not as easy as telling a woman she feels and she is safe.
00:49:23.760 --> 00:49:26.239
It's not you can't just tell your woman you're saying, you're safe.
00:49:26.400 --> 00:49:33.119
It's in the actions that you partake in, it's in decisions that you make for a family, it's in the leadership that you show.
00:49:33.360 --> 00:49:35.840
It's in nervous system regulation.
00:49:36.000 --> 00:49:37.360
It's like they can feel you.
00:49:37.519 --> 00:49:40.800
Like a woman, as I said, is so much more sensitive than us as men.
00:49:40.880 --> 00:49:48.960
They can feel when you are dysregulated, when you come home from work and you haven't taken a breath for yourself and you come in through the door, you're still racing a million miles an hour, they can feel that.
00:49:49.360 --> 00:49:52.400
Probably even such a mirror with Florence as well as a baby daughter.
00:49:52.719 --> 00:49:53.679
It is 100%.
00:49:54.239 --> 00:49:56.079
Like the sensitivity is really there.
00:49:56.559 --> 00:49:57.280
And it's cool.
00:49:57.440 --> 00:50:02.559
I'm going off track here, but you know, Florence, she is the same cerebral spinal fluid as Jess.
00:50:02.639 --> 00:50:07.280
So she's actually mirroring the way that Jess feels in her nervous system simultaneously.
00:50:07.440 --> 00:50:11.519
So when Jess is activated, Florence gets activated without even having connection.
00:50:11.679 --> 00:50:11.920
Wow.
00:50:12.159 --> 00:50:12.719
Crazy.
00:50:12.880 --> 00:50:17.840
But going back to the men sides of things, like the the answer is we can't force.
00:50:17.920 --> 00:50:28.800
And when we force and we try and invite them to do things, it actually pushes them further away, and they will feel under threat and they'll feel insecure and they'll feel like there's something wrong with them, and they'll get get more defensive, and you kind of go back, you backtrack.
00:50:29.280 --> 00:50:42.159
The way that I would invite them into the space is by bringing them into things such as could be conscious, bringing them down to things that are are more now seen as a social norm, but still have profound seeds planted in those sessions.
00:50:42.320 --> 00:50:48.960
I will avoid all the esoteric words, those like high, big articulated spiritual words.
00:50:49.039 --> 00:50:55.280
I don't use any of them in my events, and it's because it puts people off that are new to it, and it's hard to digest and connect with.
00:50:55.519 --> 00:51:02.559
So I'm actually like, I dumb myself down a lot at those events because it's easier to resonate with.
00:51:05.679 --> 00:51:11.599
If I try and be like super scientific and really articulated and intelligent, you lose half the people.
00:51:11.679 --> 00:51:12.800
And I've played with it before.
00:51:12.960 --> 00:51:18.320
I can stand up there and speak words, and I literally feel the whole group just disappear.
00:51:18.480 --> 00:51:22.639
Oh, you know, and I'll I'll play with it, but okay, I've lost you and and make a joke.
00:51:22.719 --> 00:51:25.039
But it's the same thing with men and your partners.
00:51:25.119 --> 00:51:32.400
Don't make it so complicated and try not to use big language and words, try and make it really simple.
00:51:32.480 --> 00:51:42.719
And like I feel that brotherhood circles and men's groups is really necessary, but they're still really intimidating to every like everyday blokes and men that are out there.
00:51:42.880 --> 00:51:53.840
So I'm trying to do my best to really again bridge the gap into those spaces and bring people together in the form of co-sex experiences with these beach events.
00:51:54.159 --> 00:52:01.440
And a lot of the men come down there that get dragged by their girlfriends, and the other ones that come up to me at the end and go, bro, what was that?
00:52:01.519 --> 00:52:04.480
Like, I feel so different, I feel so good, I feel so present.
00:52:04.719 --> 00:52:06.960
And I'm just like, welcome back, welcome back.
00:52:07.199 --> 00:52:12.719
You know, this is where we're meant to be living from a place of presence and stability and grandedness.
00:52:13.039 --> 00:52:26.880
So yeah, to the all the women that are listening, they're like, Man, I need to get my man into the stuff, bring them down to one of these events because they don't see them as the challenging environment to be a part of, and just trust that the seeds we planted there for them to feel the change inside of them.
00:52:27.119 --> 00:52:36.159
And you know, there's even ways that you can go about it of speaking into things that men connect with more in terms of like sexual connection and intimacy.
00:52:36.400 --> 00:52:53.119
You can explain that breath work brings a lot more sexual sensation and experience in the bed and use ways to bring in this stuff that's quite deep and spiritual, but in ways that are playful and fun rather than mate, you need to do some breath work, you know, regulate your nervous system.
00:52:53.199 --> 00:52:56.800
How about like why don't you learn some breath work so we can incorporate it in the bedroom?
00:52:57.119 --> 00:53:01.760
Be more invitational through fun and play and lightness rather than you need to sort your shit out, mate.
00:53:01.840 --> 00:53:02.960
Yeah, but you need to fix you.
00:53:03.039 --> 00:53:03.760
Yeah, I need to fix you.
00:53:03.840 --> 00:53:04.480
You broke it, mate.
00:53:04.559 --> 00:53:05.039
I sort it out.
00:53:05.119 --> 00:53:08.960
Yeah, I've seen your breathing, it's bad because yeah, we take that as a personal attack.
00:53:09.199 --> 00:53:11.760
Yeah, and so would any, you know, so would anyone.
00:53:12.079 --> 00:53:16.639
And I feel like as well, I often think this with my partner, he's he lets things so slide with me so much.
00:53:16.800 --> 00:53:27.519
Yeah, and men that usually do, but maybe us women we like and as well because we want with such a feminine masculine of you want your man to be the best he can be, and you want him to have his best experience.
00:53:27.760 --> 00:53:41.519
I've always felt like it's best to just be that space that when it's needed, like they can come to you, or when it's needed, and having I've always dropped little human design things with that because my partner, he's not necessarily spiritual, yeah, but a really good man.
00:53:41.599 --> 00:53:43.760
Yeah, really good man, best friend.
00:53:44.000 --> 00:53:50.320
I just feel like that something as well, because it was even something that I moved through of does he need to be really spiritual?
00:53:50.480 --> 00:54:00.079
No, and I was like, there was this moment when he's he makes me laugh the most out of anyone in the world, and he makes me like I get so silly with him, and I don't, I'm not like that with uh anyone else in the world.
00:54:00.239 --> 00:54:05.039
And I was like, this is the most spiritual experience laughing and just enjoying life.
00:54:05.280 --> 00:54:05.679
I love that.
00:54:05.920 --> 00:54:09.280
He has a surfing, he does his things, and yeah, he's also extremely wise.
00:54:09.360 --> 00:54:24.000
Yes, he might not have my language and my lingo, so I feel like sometimes we can put these parameters, and I can speak for myself as a woman, I can put these parameters of what right or what is wrong, and it's no what actually at the core do I desire in a conscious relationship?
00:54:24.400 --> 00:54:28.400
And then if that's being met beautiful, we don't have to create extra criteria.
00:54:28.719 --> 00:54:29.519
No, I love that.
00:54:29.599 --> 00:54:47.760
And you know, I could probably talk for another hour on this, but in the space of growth and let's use the word consciousness and spirituality, a lot of men are actually misunderstanding what it means to be self-aware and to be responsible and take ownership for who they are and how they're showing up in the world.
00:54:48.079 --> 00:54:59.199
And there's this, I would say, obsession with personal growth and evolution in their spiritual journey, and it's actually becoming too much, and the spiritual ego is getting really clever.
00:54:59.519 --> 00:55:13.920
And I I think a lot of women that are vulnerable and new to conscious men are getting caught up in that, thinking that man's gonna be conscious and he's he's gonna be the guy, and then end up in a really manipulative relationship or situation.
00:55:14.159 --> 00:55:24.320
So discernment is so key, and like woman listening, like tuning in with your body and listening to how it feels when you're around men is the most important aspect of the whole relationship.
00:55:24.639 --> 00:55:33.840
And when you shared that just before about how your man's not spiritual, but he's got good values, he's got good morals, he treats you well clearly, like that's all you need.
00:55:34.559 --> 00:55:38.320
Like that's and that is this most that's the most important work exactly spiritually, exactly.
00:55:38.480 --> 00:55:42.079
Like treat everyone well being patient, being kind, being loving, you know.
00:55:42.480 --> 00:55:44.639
You can have all the words, do all the practices, have the routines.
00:55:45.599 --> 00:55:46.880
But what are you doing behind closed doors?
00:55:47.199 --> 00:55:50.400
And what are you doing when no one's watching and when the cameras aren't on?
00:55:50.480 --> 00:55:51.760
Like that is the work right there.
00:55:52.320 --> 00:56:07.199
And I'm realizing like this next chapter of my life, and it's quite a scary one because I'm usually so on social media and interacting on social media, and I feel so disconnected from it because I'm seeing so much inauthenticity on there, and it's really hard to watch.
00:56:07.360 --> 00:56:14.880
People are sharing all the right words and saying the right things, but you you don't feel it, and the transmission is so inauthentic, it's not funny.
00:56:14.960 --> 00:56:19.679
So I'm feeling like so disconnected from my phone and from social media these days.
00:56:19.840 --> 00:56:33.119
But going back to what you just mentioned before about your partner and to the woman that are listening, if your man takes ownership of his actions and he knows when he messes up and he's like I messed up, babe, like the way that I treated you, the way that I talked to you isn't good, and I've learned so much from that.
00:56:33.280 --> 00:56:34.239
That's a green flag.
00:56:34.559 --> 00:56:37.679
If he doesn't take ownership and he blames you, no good.
00:56:38.000 --> 00:56:47.599
And but the other two things, like if he takes ownership and you feel safe when he does that, and in moments of vulnerability, he can be with you in the vulnerability.
00:56:47.760 --> 00:56:48.000
Right.
00:56:48.159 --> 00:56:54.800
If he's a blubbery mess all the time and he's like just being way too emotional, that's also not that's not a masculine trait either.
00:56:55.119 --> 00:57:05.679
So again, we could talk about this stuff for hours, but the perfect man isn't out there, but most men and all men should be able to take ownership and responsibility for the actions and know who they are and how they're showing up.
00:57:05.920 --> 00:57:08.159
That's it, you know that's what makes us feel safe.
00:57:08.480 --> 00:57:13.840
That's what makes you feel safe as a woman and is the most important component to a relationship, feeling safe in that.
00:57:14.079 --> 00:57:14.559
Yeah.
00:57:14.880 --> 00:57:16.239
Well, thank you so much, Ryan.
00:57:16.480 --> 00:57:17.440
I could keep talking.
00:57:18.960 --> 00:57:22.320
I have so many other things I'd love to ask you, but respectful of your time.
00:57:22.400 --> 00:57:23.440
So thank you so much.
00:57:23.599 --> 00:57:30.239
And I'd love to have you here for everyone that could find more of your work, all that's happening with Call to Be Conscious, or your teaching, please share.
00:57:30.559 --> 00:57:32.000
No, thank you so much for having me.
00:57:32.079 --> 00:57:33.119
It's been it's been great.
00:57:33.280 --> 00:57:40.800
I know we only had 45 minutes, and uh, as I mentioned, I feel like we're just getting to the conversations into the good stuff, but we'll have to do it another time.
00:57:40.880 --> 00:57:42.559
And I'd also love to have you on our podcast.
00:57:43.039 --> 00:57:47.599
I'm not very great at it, but and in terms of the consistency, but I'd love to I'd love to do that.
00:57:47.679 --> 00:57:48.000
Yeah.
00:57:48.239 --> 00:57:49.760
And my partner would love to meet you.
00:57:50.320 --> 00:57:52.800
I was just thinking in my head, and I really want to meet Jess.
00:57:53.039 --> 00:57:54.079
She would love to talk to you.
00:57:54.320 --> 00:57:56.719
So Jess is a 6'2 projector, I've just been told.
00:57:56.800 --> 00:58:00.480
So she is incredibly wise, incredibly natural at all she does.
00:58:00.559 --> 00:58:01.920
So she'd be great on his own.
00:58:02.000 --> 00:58:02.320
That's crazy.
00:58:02.880 --> 00:58:04.400
Yeah, I yes, actually, I would love that.
00:58:04.639 --> 00:58:10.320
And for those that want to follow social media, as I just mentioned, I'm not very good at my personal account and I haven't been very active on there.
00:58:10.400 --> 00:58:11.039
But you can find that through.
00:58:11.280 --> 00:58:12.000
You're in your integrity.
00:58:13.039 --> 00:58:15.679
You can find that through Call to Be Conscious if you want to check out my private channel.
00:58:15.760 --> 00:58:20.400
But yeah, all the events, everything that we offer and the courses that we do are all through Call to Be Conscious.
00:58:20.639 --> 00:58:21.760
Yeah, thanks again for having me.
00:58:22.000 --> 00:58:22.719
Great sharing with you.
00:58:23.039 --> 00:58:25.840
And thank you for doing all the work that you do and sharing all you do.
00:58:26.000 --> 00:58:27.360
It's needed, it's necessary.
00:58:27.519 --> 00:58:29.280
And so many women look up to you.
00:58:29.360 --> 00:58:33.280
And we need role models, we need guides, and we need embodied people out here.
00:58:33.519 --> 00:58:35.039
So thank you for doing the work that you do.
00:58:35.280 --> 00:58:35.519
Thank you.
00:58:35.760 --> 00:58:36.400
All received.
00:58:36.559 --> 00:58:37.519
We're right back at you.
00:58:37.679 --> 00:58:44.880
It's really refreshing and it's really beautiful to see like a man in his integrity, conscious, embodied, and just sharing with our ego.
00:58:44.960 --> 00:58:45.760
So it's really beautiful.
00:58:45.840 --> 00:58:46.400
So thank you.
00:58:46.800 --> 00:58:47.199
Pleasure.
00:58:47.280 --> 00:58:48.000
Thanks for having me.
00:58:49.360 --> 00:58:50.800
Thank you so much, Ryan.
00:58:50.880 --> 00:58:51.920
It was such a pleasure.
00:58:52.079 --> 00:58:59.199
And for those who would like to explore Ryan's offerings more, would like to join an event for Cool to Be Conscious, definitely follow them on Instagram.
00:58:59.280 --> 00:59:00.800
That's where they announce.
00:59:01.039 --> 00:59:04.320
And they have events all over Australia.
00:59:04.639 --> 00:59:12.800
I'm so inspired by people that are just so true to their heart in their integrity, creating these spaces and you really feel it at the call to be conscious events.
00:59:12.880 --> 00:59:26.480
And as Ryan was just saying, it's a great thing to bring your friends and your partner to that may be really new to this work, maybe really, yeah, like open and excited, but it might feel intimidating in other places.
00:59:26.559 --> 00:59:35.039
And this is really the beauty and what I really felt when I've gone to the call to be conscious events was just like, no, this is such a beautiful, welcoming space.
00:59:35.280 --> 00:59:39.679
And starting the mornings like that, it's just it's so activating and so beautiful.
00:59:39.840 --> 00:59:43.760
So definitely, definitely follow Ryan and Cool to Be Conscious.
00:59:43.840 --> 00:59:46.400
They're just it's just great to have that energy in your life.
00:59:46.480 --> 00:59:48.239
I really enjoy what Ryan shares.
00:59:48.320 --> 00:59:55.760
I know he would just show him that social media is not feeling a line for him, but the way he shares on social media is definitely a line for me.
00:59:55.840 --> 00:59:57.039
Like it's great to follow.
00:59:57.119 --> 00:59:58.800
So I'm very grateful for Ryan.
00:59:58.880 --> 01:00:02.159
And I would recommend as well, if you're not in Australia, just have a look.
01:00:02.239 --> 01:00:09.280
There's people doing events like this in America, in Europe, and you might have to scour them out.
01:00:09.519 --> 01:00:10.800
But if not, go online.
01:00:11.119 --> 01:00:15.519
It's so important community and to feel like you are not alone in your journey.
01:00:15.679 --> 01:00:16.639
Okay, my loves.
01:00:16.800 --> 01:00:22.000
If you wanted to join the advanced human design certification, this is your chance, this is your time.
01:00:22.159 --> 01:00:24.880
This is the last time I will be running it live in this manner.
01:00:25.119 --> 01:00:26.159
Such a powerful space.
01:00:26.239 --> 01:00:26.960
I'll leave it at that.
01:00:27.199 --> 01:00:27.920
Such a powerful space.
01:00:28.000 --> 01:00:37.679
You will learn everything you need to learn in order to become an advanced human design practitioner, and you will also connect with beautiful, like-minded people that are with you every step of the way for six months.
01:00:37.920 --> 01:00:44.559
What makes this certification different is that you receive mentoring and guidance by me, and you also have that community connection.
01:00:44.639 --> 01:00:49.599
There's so many that don't include that, or that you might be one of 200 people in there.
01:00:49.840 --> 01:00:55.599
So, what I enjoy here is that you will feel like you are part of the family here with us.
01:00:55.760 --> 01:00:56.960
So very excited.
01:00:57.119 --> 01:01:00.880
We're starting soon, so definitely jump on in and thank you so much.
01:01:01.119 --> 01:01:03.119
I will speak to you next week.
