Bonus Bang: A CBB World Speed Force Thanksgiving Special* (*It's Actually Skanksgiving)

WEBVTT
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This is an Aero.
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Mmm.
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And this is the sound of its minty bubbles. Conjuring
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melt in your mouth, pure bubbly joy. Melt into the
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moment with Aero's delicious peppermint bubbles.
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Aero, feel the bubbles melt.
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Did you always want to become a teacher?
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For as long as I can remember.
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Danny! Shut up!
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You pushed a girl down the stairs.
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I'm going to tell everyone you attacked me.
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Let me go!
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I hate you!
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Investigations continue into the disappearance of Danny Carter.
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You're never letting me go, are you? Is anyone feeling
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sad or anxious now?
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All right.
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Bad Apples in cinemas September 18th.
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Hey, everyone.
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Scott Aukerman here, and welcome to another bonus bang where
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we are re-releasing great episodes of Comedy Bang Bang out
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from behind the paywall. And, guys, we have something very
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special this week. Because this bonus bang is coming out
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exactly on Thanksgiving Day, we're going to put out something
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from the CBB Presents archives, which is a Thanksgiving special.
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That we did.
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This is called a CBB World Speed Force Thanksgiving special
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with the parenthetical. It's actually skanksgiving. And this was originally
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released in the CBB Presents feed on November 24th, four
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years ago, 2021, and has only been available there until now.
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We're We're getting it out here and we're going to
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let everyone hear it. This, of course, was a time bending,
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mind warping adventure. And it starred our good friend Rudy North.
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That's right.
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Sean Diston playing Rudy North. It also has Lily Sullivan,
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Zach Reno, Matt Apodaca, Will Hines and Devin Field. So
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a great, great cast, plus incredible music and sound design
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done by Brett Morris and And this is a big
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Thanksgiving special from Rudy North. I want you to listen
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to this and then make sure you hear it all
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the way to the end, even past the wrap up,
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because something something very interesting happens at the very end
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of the episode. And you're going to want to hear it.
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So listen to the whole thing. But if you enjoy
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this and you want to hear other great episodes of
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Comedy Bang Bang, as well as CBB Presents, become a
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subscriber at CBBWorld.com. We have specials like this. We have
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all of the past episodes from the archives, every live
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show we've done, ad-free new episodes, and original shows like
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Scott Hasn't Seen, other Neighborhood Listen, College Town, so much
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great stuff over there. We're going to be back Monday
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with a new episode of Comedy Bang Bang, but until then,
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a happy skanksgiving to you and yours, and enjoy this
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bonus bang.
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CBB presents. In the beginning, there was only Scott Ackerman.
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And then there was the great Bang Bang. In an
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explosion of creativity and business savvy, he created CBB World,
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thus spawning the CBB Worldiverse. Then came Rudy North, a
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being of unknowable power. They connected at Speed Force Thanksgiving
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1304 days ago. But since that Thanksgiving, In a mysterious
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set of circumstances, the Speed Force and CBB Worldiverse have
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become intertwined, setting in motion a series of events that
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will change CBB World forever. Damn, that Marvel movie was
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good as hell. They got some Eternals in that motherfucker. Hey,
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excuse me over there. Are you cleaning up this movie theater? Yeah,
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that's my job. Now it's your job. Yeah, that's right.
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Looks like I got a new job. This is going
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to be fun. Clean up all the popcorn and shit.
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What the hell?
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What the?
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Rudy. Rudy North. Wait, who are you? Are you me? Yes,
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it is I, Rudy Prime North. Rudy North from the future. Wow,
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I look good as hell, man. Black does not crack.
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I came here to give you a warning. The CBB
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Worldiverse is in trouble.
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What?
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Well, we all know CBB World and the Speed Force
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have a mysterious connection. Well, yes, that's canon. And the
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Speed Force feeds on new canon. Canon created by you.
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I actually didn't know that. Since you've been in cannon rehab,
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the Speed Force has grown weak.
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It's dying, Rudy.
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And with it, so is the CBB worldiverse.
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Well, what do I do?
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There's only one thing you can do. You must host
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a Speed Force Thanksgiving special. And Scott has to have
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a good time. Future Rudy, I think I could do that.
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If not, the CBB world of Earth may be destroyed forever. Well,
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it looks like I'm off the wagon. Previously, two days ago,
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on Comedy Bang Bang. Okay, bye guys.
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Thank you so much for being on the show.
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Oh, man.
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Time to stretch out and relax and do my post-show stretches.
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And here we go. What the... Scott, it's me. It's Rudy.
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I made it. I made it right on time. Rudy North?
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That's right, Scott. I'm here and I've got a new tease.
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Oh, no.
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What's going on? Why are you here? Scott, I need
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you for something. Really? I need you for the Speed
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Force Thanksgiving special on cbbworld.com. Okay, whatever you need.
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We're going into the Speed Force right now?
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That's right, Scott. I know I'm not supposed to be
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using my powers because in the canon I am kind
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of in rehab. Yeah, I don't really remember. But I
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must use them for Speed Force Thanksgiving, Scott.
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Are you ready?
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Whatever you need, buddy. Let's do it. Welcome to the
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CBB World Speed Force Thanksgiving special, y'all. I'm your host,
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Rudy North. And I'm here with my guest of honor, co-host,
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with the bro-most, with the bro-host, with the We talked
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about this. What do I say?
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Co-host with the bro broast. Because I broasted a chicken
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for this. My co-host with the bro broast. Coming through
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with the bro broast.
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Scotty Aukerman. Scott, how you doing? I'm great, Rudy. So
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good to see you. Was I coming in hot just now?
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You were at least medium temperature, but you were edging
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up to hot.
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I feel like I'm coming in hot.
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You definitely are hot.
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I'm feeling good today.
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Yeah, I'm glad. Hey, I just want to make sure.
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Are we recording this? Because I don't talk unless I'm
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being recorded.
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Yes, Scott. This is the CBB World Speed Force Thanksgiving special, Scott.
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Okay, good.
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Yeah, I need to monetize any time I open my mouth.
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I wouldn't just invite you over to have dinner or
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some shit. Okay, yeah, good. we gotta make some fucking
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money man now scott i i'm so glad you're here
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because i had something to tell you scott oh really
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oh okay i.
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Let me guess uh let's see you want to tell
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me you are in a relationship.
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It's not some not kind of my thing.
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Maybe you purchased and uh something for.
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The holidays okay no you're getting.
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Closer maybe you're a family member has passed away or.
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Uh scott i got a new new job.
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Oh of course i should have known you should have
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known that was your last job i don't remember oh
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i'm trying to clean up i.
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Think my last job was i was a zoom security
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guard all right and that didn't go too well there's
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not a lot of call for it not a lot
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of call at this point you know we'll open it
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up we're not too much on zoom well i'm so
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glad we could be here in person scott in.
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Person In poison.
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Do you have a new accent?
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I've got a new affectation. Scott, I'm so glad we
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could be here in person inside the Speed Force, Scott. Oh,
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my God. Some of my most favorite times in my
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life have been spent in the Speed Force with you.
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For the people who don't know, me and Scott in
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2018 celebrated our first Speed Force Thanksgiving together.
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Four years ago, we traveled inside this, you know, for
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those of you who don't know even this, Rudy, you
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have the powers of the Flash.
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I have the powers of the Flash. I got the
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powers of the Force from Star Wars. I do think
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I could stretch my arms like Stretch Armstrong.
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I've never seen that and you've never even tried. No,
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I tried to do it one time, did not work.
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So why do you think you have these powers?
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That's a good question, Scott. I think, therefore I am. Oh, okay.
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So it's one of those things. But you know, Scott,
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I'm so glad you're here. We're in the Speed Force
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for the listeners.
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How many times are you going to say, you're so
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glad I'm here?
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Hold on.
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I'm so glad I'm here. I'm so glad I'm here.
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I'm so glad to be here. I'm freaking glad to
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be here, Scott.
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Okay.
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Because we celebrated four years ago and we haven't really
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kept up the tradition of Speed Force Thanksgiving.
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No, I mean, honestly, the pandemic happened.
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It happened.
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And.
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We can't... In the Speed Force... By the way, the
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Speed Force is about a... It's a six by... six room.
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Yeah it's also very covid compliant you need to like
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do home testing they kind of shut pcr test 48
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hours in advance we.
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Were like fuck that they shut stuff down in the
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speed force months before they didn't in.
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La yeah and i and i had been you know
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i'd been holing up with uh sprague you were hanging
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out with sprague the entire pandemic.
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And you guys were having fun huh we had a
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lot of fun what you guys been up to we
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we did not take it seriously for the first night
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you guys were in restaurants and shit kissing people and
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so you guys have fun you've been watching movies that's
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how it that's been sounding like a blast i heard
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yeah oh it's been so fun i mean i've missed
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you obviously but i mean best friend scott Oh, of
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course we're best friends, but I hang out with him exclusively. Oh, truly, truly. Well,
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we became best friends in the Speed Force, Scott.
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We did.
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I didn't much know that much about you or care
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that much about you, and then we went to the
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Speed Force together.
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We spent multiple years in the Speed Force, and they
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came back to the very moment we left, Scott.
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And it's interesting because it was a lot like Picard
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in that one episode of Next Generation where- he mentally
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goes into someone else's body and ages, you know, but
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when he gets back to his own present, he hasn't
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aged a day. And that was what happened with us.
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So he's like gained the wisdom of a lifetime. Exactly.
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And he knows how to play like a weird flute,
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which I also do. Yeah.
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Yeah.
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You do, don't you? Yeah. Let me see. Let me
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see if you could play that weird. Here we go.
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I saw you brought it. Let's see. How are you playing? Yeah,
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that's not.
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Yeah.
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You might want to flip it around. There you go.
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It's pretty weird. That's a lot. I got to say.
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That was pretty good. How long did it take you?
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45 years to learn that?
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45 years to learn that.
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That is a long time. My wife was bummed.
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Oh, by the way, I was married in the Speed
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Force to someone else.
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Who'd you marry? Oh, I married the Black Racer.
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Oh, yes.
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The Black Racer. Yes. From the canon of, you know,
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the Flash. Yeah, of course.
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Yeah, well, I mean, we share canon with the Flash.
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Yes, yes, yes.
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We all share canon.
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It's almost the same way you share the.
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The canon of Star Wars, the canon of everything. Well, yes,
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but the powers of the Flash as well. I have
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the powers of the Flash. But you know, Scott, the
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last time we talked, I was in canon rehab. Yeah,
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I remember something about that. And your sponsor was Cake Boss.
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My sponsor, Cake Boss. Yeah, because he's had a lot
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of trouble recently, too, with, like, you know, fucking up
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his hand. Yeah, he, like, nailed his hand into a
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00:12:13.080 --> 00:12:15.919
cake or something. I don't remember what that dude's was. But,
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you know, the last time I was here, I said
248
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I would never use my Flash powers again. Right. But
249
00:12:21.590 --> 00:12:23.929
I thought to myself, it's Speed Force Thanksgiving.
250
00:12:24.730 --> 00:12:25.970
We got to get the homies together.
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00:12:25.990 --> 00:12:28.870
I got to get the homies together. And look, there
252
00:12:28.909 --> 00:12:31.580
might be some sort of convoluted reason why we need
253
00:12:31.600 --> 00:12:32.879
to do this to save.
254
00:12:32.580 --> 00:12:34.570
The CBB world of us. I'm just here for you.
255
00:12:34.580 --> 00:12:37.440
We don't need to discuss that. Right now, Scott, you're
256
00:12:37.460 --> 00:12:39.399
about to have the best Speed Force Skanksgiving.
257
00:12:40.899 --> 00:12:41.580
Skanksgiving.
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00:12:41.600 --> 00:12:46.190
Skanksgiving. That you've ever had in your life, Scott. It's
259
00:12:46.210 --> 00:12:48.309
going to be a Skanksgiving. Basically, when all the skanks
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from Halloween who have dressed up like slutty versions of whatever.
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00:12:51.029 --> 00:12:53.710
They forget to change for a month. And then they
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00:12:53.730 --> 00:12:55.590
come and they're like, what, y'all eating turkey in here?
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That's Skanksgiving, Scott. Now, Scott, are you ready to explore
264
00:13:01.929 --> 00:13:05.419
your own life, Scott? I don't know what that means.
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00:13:05.559 --> 00:13:07.799
So I couldn't tell you if I'm ready. I probably
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00:13:07.899 --> 00:13:09.379
am because I don't give a shit.
267
00:13:09.539 --> 00:13:13.399
Scott, the meaning of Speed Force Thanksgiving, as we all know,
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00:13:14.009 --> 00:13:16.940
It's to reflect on the things that you are thankful for, Scott.
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00:13:17.179 --> 00:13:20.080
I didn't realize that. That's almost like regular Thanksgiving.
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It is.
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Oh, hold up. Let me check my Twitter real quick.
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00:13:23.139 --> 00:13:23.330
Hmm.
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00:13:23.750 --> 00:13:26.429
Regular Thanksgiving is canceled. What?
274
00:13:26.990 --> 00:13:30.909
Oh, regular Thanksgiving is canceled. The word Thanksgiving. should not
275
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be used anymore.
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00:13:32.259 --> 00:13:37.539
They finally canceled Thanksgiving? God, this is cancel culture. I
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think we can't say Thanksgiving, Scott, because the history of
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Thanksgiving is tainted, Scott.
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00:13:42.440 --> 00:13:45.940
Oh, I mean, yeah, on both sides. Both sides. Some
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very fine people.
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There's fine people on both sides? It's tainted on both sides, Scott.
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00:13:51.039 --> 00:13:53.350
So, you know what? I think we should rename this
283
00:13:53.389 --> 00:13:56.149
thing right off the bat. Okay, let's spitball some ideas.
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00:13:56.210 --> 00:14:01.779
I want to call it We could call it Skanksgiving.
285
00:14:02.039 --> 00:14:03.419
We kind of already have that.
286
00:14:03.700 --> 00:14:06.139
It's pretty good, actually. We just stumbled into it. Okay,
287
00:14:06.279 --> 00:14:09.419
is it better? I know you came in with something
288
00:14:09.440 --> 00:14:11.090
that you were very fond of, but let's just put
289
00:14:11.110 --> 00:14:13.590
it up against Skanksgiving. Yeah, yeah. Am I going to
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00:14:13.649 --> 00:14:18.470
get canceled for saying Speed Force Thanksgiving or Speed Force Skanksgiving?
291
00:14:18.870 --> 00:14:20.950
I like Skanksgiving. I don't know.
292
00:14:21.049 --> 00:14:21.350
Okay.
293
00:14:21.970 --> 00:14:24.460
Okay, here's what we're going to call it. A CBB
294
00:14:24.500 --> 00:14:31.200
World Speed Force Thanksgiving Special Asterix Actually, it's Skanksgiving. Okay.
295
00:14:31.320 --> 00:14:33.850
All right. I think we won't get canceled for that. No, no, no.
296
00:14:33.950 --> 00:14:36.309
How could two guys like you and me get canceled?
297
00:14:36.330 --> 00:14:39.590
I'm cancel-proof, baby. I punch people in the throat all
298
00:14:39.610 --> 00:14:44.240
the time. I steal people's jobs. I am cancel proof, Scott. Yeah, exactly.
299
00:14:44.259 --> 00:14:45.139
And so am I, right?
300
00:14:45.240 --> 00:14:45.620
Yeah.
301
00:14:45.639 --> 00:14:50.120
Right? Yeah, exactly. Your eyes are darting around really fast.
302
00:14:50.139 --> 00:14:51.779
Just don't listen to the CBB archives.
303
00:14:51.879 --> 00:14:52.639
Okay, yeah, yeah, yeah.
304
00:14:53.159 --> 00:14:55.899
I'd say start at episode 600, to be safe. Yeah,
305
00:14:55.919 --> 00:14:58.399
that's probably around when we started, really.
306
00:14:58.779 --> 00:15:04.210
Well, Scott, Thanksgiving, I mean, Thanksgiving, can only be celebrated
307
00:15:04.409 --> 00:15:07.230
in the Speed Force with friends and family.
308
00:15:07.600 --> 00:15:07.960
Oh, okay.
309
00:15:07.980 --> 00:15:09.879
Well, four years ago, it was just you and me.
310
00:15:09.919 --> 00:15:11.340
It was just you and me. And of course, the
311
00:15:11.360 --> 00:15:14.039
Black Racer. And the Black Racer. And the Reverse Flash.
312
00:15:14.200 --> 00:15:14.419
Yeah.
313
00:15:14.620 --> 00:15:16.039
And I think King Shark was in there.
314
00:15:16.200 --> 00:15:16.519
Yeah.
315
00:15:17.620 --> 00:15:17.860
But.
316
00:15:18.059 --> 00:15:20.759
The Weather Wizard. The Weather Wizard was in there. Just
317
00:15:20.779 --> 00:15:21.240
to eat.
318
00:15:21.340 --> 00:15:22.980
And then was like, oh, God, I got another thing.
319
00:15:23.000 --> 00:15:24.039
He's got another thing.
320
00:15:24.059 --> 00:15:26.360
And I'm like, okay, Weather Wizard. He's going home to
321
00:15:26.419 --> 00:15:29.240
jack off or something. Weather Wizard always jacking off.
322
00:15:29.279 --> 00:15:31.620
Jacking off in a sleep store.
323
00:15:31.639 --> 00:15:36.080
He's crazy. That's canon. On his dick. Now, Scott, I have...
324
00:15:36.889 --> 00:15:40.659
Gone into your history, into your past, into your soul, Scott.
325
00:15:40.799 --> 00:15:43.039
Not the CBB archives. No, no, no, no, no. Okay.
326
00:15:43.440 --> 00:15:47.299
Kind of hovering, starting around episode 600. I have assembled
327
00:15:48.120 --> 00:15:51.690
a motley crew of a Thanksgiving family, Scott.
328
00:15:52.350 --> 00:15:56.389
Oh, like you've brought in some of my favorite guests
329
00:15:56.470 --> 00:15:57.110
of all time?
330
00:15:57.509 --> 00:16:00.710
Some of the most iconic, some of the most memorable.
331
00:16:00.730 --> 00:16:03.759
You say iconic too? I say iconic too, baby. Some
332
00:16:03.779 --> 00:16:06.919
of the most iconic, memorable guests that I think when
333
00:16:07.039 --> 00:16:08.990
you had them on, I think when it was over,
334
00:16:09.019 --> 00:16:11.009
you said, we need to be friends outside of this.
335
00:16:11.169 --> 00:16:12.649
I want to invite you to actual things.
336
00:16:12.769 --> 00:16:13.110
Okay.
337
00:16:13.149 --> 00:16:14.049
This is amazing.
338
00:16:14.190 --> 00:16:16.649
I mean, the mind is just reeling of who could
339
00:16:16.669 --> 00:16:17.210
possibly be here.
340
00:16:17.230 --> 00:16:18.710
Who are you thinking about? Jason Manzoukas or something?
341
00:16:18.889 --> 00:16:19.409
Oh, of course.
342
00:16:19.450 --> 00:16:19.750
Yeah.
343
00:16:19.789 --> 00:16:20.870
Jason Manzoukas probably.
344
00:16:20.990 --> 00:16:23.649
Yeah. Probably Santa Claus or something.
345
00:16:23.690 --> 00:16:24.669
Not too fond of Santa Claus.
346
00:16:24.690 --> 00:16:26.029
You guys get into a lot of fights.
347
00:16:26.049 --> 00:16:26.330
Yeah.
348
00:16:26.740 --> 00:16:31.649
But Scott, I'm about to fetch... Our first guest. Okay.
349
00:16:31.809 --> 00:16:33.830
I'm so excited. But in order to do that, I
350
00:16:33.929 --> 00:16:36.350
do have to dip into the Speed Force, Scott.
351
00:16:36.529 --> 00:16:36.929
Oh, okay.
352
00:16:36.950 --> 00:16:40.360
Yeah, that's understandable. Are you picking up these guests from?
353
00:16:40.740 --> 00:16:45.580
I'm picking up these guests from episodes past. Oh, okay.
354
00:16:45.940 --> 00:16:52.419
This episode. God, I don't even fucking know. sometime last year,
355
00:16:52.519 --> 00:16:55.789
sometime hovering around the 600s. Scott, you ready to meet
356
00:16:55.830 --> 00:16:56.289
this guest?
357
00:16:56.450 --> 00:16:59.570
Oh, yeah, definitely. God, this is amazing that you would
358
00:16:59.590 --> 00:17:00.029
do this for me.
359
00:17:00.029 --> 00:17:11.150
Here we go. I'm about to go. And... Scott.
360
00:17:11.380 --> 00:17:11.839
Oh my God.
361
00:17:11.880 --> 00:17:12.559
You're all sweaty.
362
00:17:12.640 --> 00:17:14.980
I'm all sweaty. That was really hard. Scott. Wait, were
363
00:17:15.000 --> 00:17:18.440
you jacking off too? No, Scott. I mean, look, when
364
00:17:18.460 --> 00:17:20.819
you're running, I will say when you're running through time,
365
00:17:21.160 --> 00:17:23.509
there is a sort of friction that happens on your body.
366
00:17:23.529 --> 00:17:24.670
That is very hot.
367
00:17:24.710 --> 00:17:25.309
Very pleasant.
368
00:17:25.369 --> 00:17:26.069
It is very pleasant.
369
00:17:26.109 --> 00:17:26.390
Okay.
370
00:17:26.630 --> 00:17:31.190
But Scott, I have brought one of your favorite guests, Francesca.
371
00:17:31.769 --> 00:17:37.269
Bolognese, Scott. What the heck am I doing here? Hi, Francesca.
372
00:17:37.309 --> 00:17:38.609
How are you?
373
00:17:38.690 --> 00:17:38.990
Hi.
374
00:17:39.150 --> 00:17:39.609
Hi, Francesca.
375
00:17:39.630 --> 00:17:40.250
Hey, Scott.
376
00:17:40.269 --> 00:17:43.950
You look about four years older. I just saw you
377
00:17:43.970 --> 00:17:44.880
like three months ago.
378
00:17:50.119 --> 00:17:52.980
Sorry. I'm so sorry. I guess you had a rough
379
00:17:53.019 --> 00:17:54.279
few months.
380
00:17:54.319 --> 00:17:57.160
Francesca, how are you? Thank you for being here. Welcome
381
00:17:57.200 --> 00:17:58.720
to Speed Force Thanksgiving.
382
00:17:58.759 --> 00:18:04.150
Thank you for having me. I'm honored.
383
00:18:04.190 --> 00:18:04.609
What's your name?
384
00:18:04.650 --> 00:18:04.809
Rudy?
385
00:18:05.170 --> 00:18:06.869
My name is Rudy.
386
00:18:07.089 --> 00:18:10.029
So used to talking to my best friend. My other friend, Spray.
387
00:18:10.049 --> 00:18:12.289
Yeah, I wouldn't bring that up again. That might piss
388
00:18:12.309 --> 00:18:12.549
me off.
389
00:18:12.630 --> 00:18:12.829
Okay.
390
00:18:13.750 --> 00:18:16.150
What is she doing here? She's one of your favorite guests,
391
00:18:16.170 --> 00:18:17.869
Francesca Bolognese. Francesca Bolognese?
392
00:18:18.130 --> 00:18:20.190
Yeah, yeah, absolutely.
393
00:18:20.470 --> 00:18:23.589
She hates me. No, no, that cannot be true.
394
00:18:23.609 --> 00:18:23.990
Oh, okay.
395
00:18:24.119 --> 00:18:24.410
All right.
396
00:18:24.779 --> 00:18:27.599
Hey, Francesca, I'm so glad you're, I'm so honored you're here.
397
00:18:27.619 --> 00:18:30.940
I heard everything you guys said, you little assholes.
398
00:18:31.819 --> 00:18:34.740
Such a piece of shit everything.
399
00:18:34.000 --> 00:18:37.789
You guys say no what do you mean listen um
400
00:18:38.670 --> 00:18:41.049
i i want to start a clean slate okay i'm
401
00:18:41.069 --> 00:18:43.630
gonna have a good time today okay well thank.
402
00:18:43.390 --> 00:18:45.569
You for coming to speed for i did dip into
403
00:18:45.609 --> 00:18:47.690
the episode and pull your ass out and said we're
404
00:18:47.710 --> 00:18:50.200
about to have thanksgiving dinner come with me and you
405
00:18:50.240 --> 00:18:52.599
said okay whatever oh in the middle of the episode
406
00:18:52.619 --> 00:18:55.099
yeah yeah i pulled about the middle like mid-sentence no
407
00:18:55.119 --> 00:18:57.900
it was kind of around plugs oh okay you during
408
00:18:57.920 --> 00:18:58.960
the actual plug i.
409
00:18:58.940 --> 00:19:01.400
Was talking about the new twitter handle that i found
410
00:19:01.480 --> 00:19:05.380
out about.
411
00:19:06.509 --> 00:19:09.210
L-i-l-y that'd be kind of wasteful if you had that
412
00:19:09.250 --> 00:19:09.930
as a twitter.
413
00:19:09.710 --> 00:19:12.930
Handle no it's not my twitter i know jason manzoukas yeah.
414
00:19:13.109 --> 00:19:15.250
Okay oh he's here he's coming no no no he's
415
00:19:15.289 --> 00:19:18.309
not jason manzoukas i don't think i mean maybe maybe
416
00:19:18.369 --> 00:19:22.099
keep hopes up all right now francesca yes uh Tell
417
00:19:22.140 --> 00:19:25.559
me about your connection to Thanksgiving. Are you happy to
418
00:19:25.640 --> 00:19:28.720
be here today? Do they even celebrate it? Where are
419
00:19:28.740 --> 00:19:29.279
you from again?
420
00:19:29.480 --> 00:19:30.579
I am from Italy.
421
00:19:30.640 --> 00:19:33.059
I am from Sardinia. Okay.
422
00:19:33.099 --> 00:19:34.339
That's why I am so small.
423
00:19:36.059 --> 00:19:39.140
Oh. Interesting. Have we talked about how small you are?
424
00:19:39.160 --> 00:19:40.369
We have not talked about that.
425
00:19:40.390 --> 00:19:41.109
That's never come up?
426
00:19:41.450 --> 00:19:42.630
I don't know that that has ever come up. Did
427
00:19:42.650 --> 00:19:44.029
you start doing the show when we were on Zoom?
428
00:19:44.150 --> 00:19:45.950
I can't remember because everyone.
429
00:19:45.769 --> 00:19:46.410
Looks big on Zoom.
430
00:19:48.299 --> 00:19:51.109
So your camera was just right up. So that big
431
00:19:51.160 --> 00:19:53.170
sardine can you were sitting on, that wasn't like a
432
00:19:53.210 --> 00:19:55.710
big chair. That was an actual sardine can? Yeah, exactly.
433
00:19:55.769 --> 00:19:58.630
So I am... One foot.
434
00:19:59.369 --> 00:20:01.150
One foot tall?
435
00:20:01.809 --> 00:20:02.670
One foot tall.
436
00:20:03.250 --> 00:20:04.609
One foot tall.
437
00:20:04.609 --> 00:20:07.670
12 inches? 13 inches. Okay.
438
00:20:07.769 --> 00:20:08.730
If you want to.
439
00:20:08.750 --> 00:20:09.509
There's.
440
00:20:09.230 --> 00:20:12.130
An easy way to prove this. Let me just unzip
441
00:20:12.150 --> 00:20:15.319
my pants. So six of those.
442
00:20:17.339 --> 00:20:20.460
And a half. Six and a half. Now, Francesca, okay,
443
00:20:20.500 --> 00:20:22.920
so you're from Italy, so you're not that familiar with
444
00:20:22.960 --> 00:20:24.599
Thanksgiving or Speed Force Thanksgiving.
445
00:20:24.619 --> 00:20:25.960
No, well, I have lived in the U.S. for a
446
00:20:25.980 --> 00:20:27.799
long time now, and I have to say, I think
447
00:20:27.819 --> 00:20:29.880
Thanksgiving is so fucking stupid.
448
00:20:30.000 --> 00:20:30.599
You what?
449
00:20:30.619 --> 00:20:33.720
I think it is the stupidest little holiday.
450
00:20:33.740 --> 00:20:34.880
What do you mean?
451
00:20:35.140 --> 00:20:37.279
Well, okay, so I work for Bed, Bath & Beyond,
452
00:20:37.400 --> 00:20:38.059
as we all know.
453
00:20:38.079 --> 00:20:40.119
We all know you work for Bed, Bath & Beyond.
454
00:20:40.160 --> 00:20:46.579
They opened a new department called Bed, Bath & Holiday.
455
00:20:47.799 --> 00:20:48.140
Okay.
456
00:20:48.220 --> 00:20:52.200
What happened beyond? Well, this is just an offshoot of
457
00:20:52.220 --> 00:20:52.869
Bed Bath & Beyond.
458
00:20:52.880 --> 00:20:54.849
So when you go into Bed Bath & Holiday, there's
459
00:20:54.910 --> 00:20:55.569
nothing beyond?
460
00:20:56.349 --> 00:20:57.430
Everything is beyond.
461
00:20:57.450 --> 00:20:58.910
Oh, okay.
462
00:20:58.970 --> 00:21:00.109
Is this like the metaverse?
463
00:21:00.329 --> 00:21:00.509
Yes.
464
00:21:00.529 --> 00:21:01.230
Oh, okay. Interesting.
465
00:21:01.490 --> 00:21:03.009
Everything is beyond that.
466
00:21:03.289 --> 00:21:08.210
But specifically, Bed Bath & Holiday, we specialize in only
467
00:21:08.250 --> 00:21:13.049
holiday stuff. So I have to work on the stupidest days.
468
00:21:13.450 --> 00:21:15.970
And people come in, oh, can I get a turkey?
469
00:21:16.630 --> 00:21:20.859
Can I get a turkey? That might be their problem.
470
00:21:21.410 --> 00:21:22.450
They might be confused.
471
00:21:22.960 --> 00:21:24.460
It's a lot of meat.
472
00:21:25.539 --> 00:21:28.980
Okay, I realize they changed the name of the store.
473
00:21:29.000 --> 00:21:31.640
Okay, so Bed Bath & Holiday is kind of now
474
00:21:31.660 --> 00:21:32.099
a butcher shop.
475
00:21:32.279 --> 00:21:34.980
Yeah, so people come, you know, can I get a
476
00:21:35.220 --> 00:21:37.900
chicken or some stuffing?
477
00:21:37.960 --> 00:21:40.259
Chicken isn't even Thanksgiving related.
478
00:21:40.279 --> 00:21:41.960
It's kind of weird if they would want a chicken.
479
00:21:42.000 --> 00:21:44.309
Unless it's like a turkey or something.
480
00:21:44.549 --> 00:21:47.089
So anyway, everybody come back, oh, I want.
481
00:21:46.990 --> 00:21:49.329
To return my turkey. It tasted like a wood chip.
482
00:21:49.349 --> 00:21:50.150
So wait, they buy a turkey?
483
00:21:50.170 --> 00:21:51.049
They buy a turkey.
484
00:21:52.109 --> 00:21:53.150
And they can return it?
485
00:21:53.289 --> 00:21:55.349
And of course, well, they try to return it. They
486
00:21:55.390 --> 00:21:57.529
come to me. I work in returns.
487
00:21:57.569 --> 00:21:59.170
They come, they say.
488
00:21:59.430 --> 00:22:01.880
Oh, I try to eat this turkey. It tastes like
489
00:22:01.960 --> 00:22:06.220
wood chip. I want to return it. Or I have
490
00:22:06.539 --> 00:22:09.519
this mashed potato. It tastes like a bunch of little
491
00:22:09.599 --> 00:22:10.059
wood chip.
492
00:22:10.279 --> 00:22:12.779
Are you guys advertising that you sell food and then
493
00:22:12.799 --> 00:22:15.160
selling people wood chips? Because that would be odd, y'all.
494
00:22:16.269 --> 00:22:19.410
I mean, no, this is a high quality, best bet
495
00:22:19.549 --> 00:22:22.670
in beyond style. It is the finest quality.
496
00:22:23.369 --> 00:22:25.730
So are you working on Thanksgiving? Is that what you're saying?
497
00:22:25.750 --> 00:22:27.890
You don't get to celebrate with your own family, Francesca?
498
00:22:28.039 --> 00:22:32.440
Well, I don't want to celebrate with my husband, Keith.
499
00:22:32.519 --> 00:22:36.079
Have we talked about Keith before? I don't know that
500
00:22:36.099 --> 00:22:36.720
he's ever come up.
501
00:22:37.079 --> 00:22:37.900
He's come up.
502
00:22:38.019 --> 00:22:39.980
I don't know that that's actually his name.
503
00:22:42.190 --> 00:22:42.970
But no, Keith.
504
00:22:43.049 --> 00:22:46.049
In the Speed Force. In the Speed Force, everything is canon.
505
00:22:46.509 --> 00:22:49.349
Keith is always, oh, can you come to my family's
506
00:22:49.470 --> 00:22:55.759
house to spend Thanksgiving with my mom, Sandra, and my dad, Thomas.
507
00:22:55.880 --> 00:23:01.839
Those you remember. And I say, I think not this year.
508
00:23:01.900 --> 00:23:03.779
I think I work a bit, but I'm going to stay.
509
00:23:04.119 --> 00:23:05.539
Oh, so you're picking up shifts.
510
00:23:05.660 --> 00:23:06.779
Yes, I'm picking up.
511
00:23:07.279 --> 00:23:09.200
But really, you know, I would not go.
512
00:23:09.220 --> 00:23:11.200
I think Thanksgiving is so stupid. Why do you have
513
00:23:11.220 --> 00:23:13.940
to be so grateful for your stupid fucking life? Your
514
00:23:14.000 --> 00:23:14.960
life sucks.
515
00:23:14.980 --> 00:23:16.180
Okay, but.
516
00:23:17.119 --> 00:23:18.420
You have a bad life.
517
00:23:18.440 --> 00:23:19.849
But it's kind of like.
518
00:23:19.920 --> 00:23:22.369
Okay, you don't have anything to be thankful for, Francesca?
519
00:23:23.029 --> 00:23:23.369
I am.
520
00:23:24.190 --> 00:23:25.970
I mean, I have a good life, so.
521
00:23:25.990 --> 00:23:28.089
But that doesn't mean I have to be thankful. Do you?
522
00:23:29.750 --> 00:23:30.630
You hate your husband.
523
00:23:30.650 --> 00:23:32.930
You seem to be very upset. You hate your job.
524
00:23:33.390 --> 00:23:34.650
You hate me, I think.
525
00:23:34.710 --> 00:23:39.630
Well, yes, but my life is not as bad as, say,
526
00:23:39.690 --> 00:23:47.000
some guy named Brad who work at, like, communications, some
527
00:23:47.119 --> 00:23:48.640
kind of financial place.
528
00:23:48.819 --> 00:23:50.839
Okay. That guy's life is so stupid.
529
00:23:50.859 --> 00:23:51.359
Yeah, Brad probably sucks.
530
00:23:51.380 --> 00:23:52.980
Why does he need to say thank you for that?
531
00:23:53.809 --> 00:23:57.950
Yeah, I guess so. But I think everyone feels that
532
00:23:57.990 --> 00:24:00.009
way about their own life. Like someone would look at
533
00:24:00.049 --> 00:24:01.970
you and go like, oh my God, she's married to
534
00:24:02.099 --> 00:24:07.019
Keith with, you know, whose parents are Sandra and.
535
00:24:08.220 --> 00:24:09.220
Thomas, right?
536
00:24:09.640 --> 00:24:11.880
You know, and she works at Bed Bath & Beyond.
537
00:24:11.940 --> 00:24:13.720
And why does she have to be thankful for her
538
00:24:13.799 --> 00:24:14.720
stupid life, you know?
539
00:24:14.859 --> 00:24:19.220
My life is so good. Yeah. Well, you should be thankful.
540
00:24:19.240 --> 00:24:20.740
That's the perfect reason to be thankful.
541
00:24:20.789 --> 00:24:22.750
You want to be thankful, but you don't think anyone
542
00:24:22.769 --> 00:24:24.269
else in the world deserves to be thankful.
543
00:24:24.369 --> 00:24:24.769
Exactly.
544
00:24:24.789 --> 00:24:27.529
Well, I think everybody here have really low standards for
545
00:24:27.569 --> 00:24:28.089
their lives.
546
00:24:28.630 --> 00:24:31.509
Their lives are so bad. Okay.
547
00:24:31.670 --> 00:24:34.630
So Scott, for instance, he's got a lot to be
548
00:24:34.650 --> 00:24:35.190
thankful for.
549
00:24:35.210 --> 00:24:36.329
I don't know.
550
00:24:36.450 --> 00:24:41.369
He's got a beautiful wife. He's got a beautiful career.
551
00:24:42.150 --> 00:24:44.950
Why is that where your mind goes immediately? Scott has
552
00:24:45.019 --> 00:24:47.299
a lot going on. He's got a banging ass wife.
553
00:24:48.980 --> 00:24:53.500
Great dogs. An incredible career. Best friends.
554
00:24:53.980 --> 00:24:54.259
Yeah.
555
00:24:54.359 --> 00:24:56.480
Like me. Yeah, sure. Okay.
556
00:24:56.640 --> 00:24:58.640
So you're saying Scott has nothing to be thankful for?
557
00:24:58.660 --> 00:25:00.039
I mean, that's crazy.
558
00:25:00.200 --> 00:25:02.660
I think in Scott's mind, he has a lot to
559
00:25:02.700 --> 00:25:06.440
be thankful for. But from outside his perspective, no thank you.
560
00:25:07.180 --> 00:25:10.670
Okay. This is some beach shit to be said on Skakesgiving.
561
00:25:10.730 --> 00:25:11.549
On Skakesgiving.
562
00:25:11.730 --> 00:25:16.470
Oh, by the way, for Halloween this year, I want
563
00:25:16.490 --> 00:25:18.569
to tell you about my sexy costume.
564
00:25:18.630 --> 00:25:20.670
Yeah, what was your sexy costume?
565
00:25:21.410 --> 00:25:24.009
For Halloween this year, I was Danny DeVito.
566
00:25:24.619 --> 00:25:28.980
But sexy. Oh, okay. So bald cap.
567
00:25:29.279 --> 00:25:29.880
Bald cap.
568
00:25:29.900 --> 00:25:31.460
With hair in the back, I would imagine.
569
00:25:31.539 --> 00:25:32.180
Yes.
570
00:25:32.220 --> 00:25:34.480
But not in a specific role, like the penguin or
571
00:25:34.539 --> 00:25:35.279
Louis DePano or anything?
572
00:25:35.319 --> 00:25:38.180
From me till that. From Matilda, oh. Was that when
573
00:25:38.200 --> 00:25:39.140
he was at his sexiest?
574
00:25:39.859 --> 00:25:40.579
I think yes.
575
00:25:40.720 --> 00:25:41.440
Okay.
576
00:25:41.460 --> 00:25:43.849
So like with a G-string or?
577
00:25:43.900 --> 00:25:46.950
No pants. No pants at all. So he's Donald Duck?
578
00:25:46.970 --> 00:25:50.490
Yeah, Donald Duck style. So just the top and no bottom.
579
00:25:50.910 --> 00:25:53.289
Okay, so what did you do? You're naked from the
580
00:25:53.309 --> 00:25:53.690
waist out.
581
00:25:53.750 --> 00:25:54.930
I just wanted to establish this.
582
00:25:54.950 --> 00:25:57.309
Did you have like a packing penis or something to
583
00:25:57.349 --> 00:25:59.789
make it look like this is clearly daddy's penis? Packing peanut?
584
00:26:00.450 --> 00:26:05.650
Packing penis, it's a sex toy used in the lesbian
585
00:26:05.690 --> 00:26:13.029
community to simulate a penis. Don't you, aren't you guys
586
00:26:13.289 --> 00:26:15.579
thankful that you learned that piece of information?
587
00:26:15.720 --> 00:26:18.799
I love it. That was the best information I ever learned.
588
00:26:18.920 --> 00:26:20.839
I still don't understand.
589
00:26:20.339 --> 00:26:21.000
What it is.
590
00:26:21.079 --> 00:26:23.759
Are you simulating the, because I would imagine you're using
591
00:26:23.779 --> 00:26:25.859
your own pubic hair and then putting a fake penis
592
00:26:25.900 --> 00:26:26.440
on top of it.
593
00:26:26.480 --> 00:26:30.769
No pubic hair. Oh, I don't need to know that. Okay. Okay.
594
00:26:31.029 --> 00:26:33.329
I didn't know that that was Danny DeVito's thing. No,
595
00:26:33.369 --> 00:26:38.690
but in Sardinia, nobody have pubic hair. Really? Everybody, very. Yeah,
596
00:26:38.710 --> 00:26:41.789
you can't waste any surface area on pubic hair when
597
00:26:41.809 --> 00:26:42.349
you're that small.
598
00:26:42.369 --> 00:26:45.150
Did you want to be Danny DeVito because he's almost,
599
00:26:45.230 --> 00:26:45.910
how tall is he?
600
00:26:45.970 --> 00:26:48.480
He's like two feet three or something like that? He
601
00:26:48.500 --> 00:26:49.420
is a big guy.
602
00:26:50.079 --> 00:26:51.579
Well, to you, yeah.
603
00:26:51.740 --> 00:26:56.630
He's huge. Francesca, so you like Halloween. Is Halloween a
604
00:26:56.789 --> 00:26:57.869
fun time at the store?
605
00:26:57.890 --> 00:26:58.809
Halloween I love.
606
00:26:58.829 --> 00:27:01.990
I take my son. We go to the different houses.
607
00:27:02.019 --> 00:27:02.470
You have a son?
608
00:27:02.990 --> 00:27:04.519
Wait, you never talked about your son.
609
00:27:04.619 --> 00:27:06.240
Yes, I never talked about my son.
610
00:27:06.420 --> 00:27:09.059
Again, I don't remember his name.
611
00:27:09.720 --> 00:27:10.200
Okay.
612
00:27:10.819 --> 00:27:13.380
No, my son's name is Daniel.
613
00:27:13.400 --> 00:27:15.400
Why do you say it like that?
614
00:27:15.759 --> 00:27:17.599
You seem contemptuous of anyone else.
615
00:27:18.119 --> 00:27:20.569
Anytime you say a name, it just seems like you're upset.
616
00:27:21.279 --> 00:27:24.619
No, it's just a stupid American name.
617
00:27:24.640 --> 00:27:26.970
Oh, did your husband force you to name?
618
00:27:26.990 --> 00:27:32.289
Yes, my grandfather's name was Daniel.
619
00:27:32.410 --> 00:27:34.759
What did you want? I mean, what's a Sardinian name?
620
00:27:34.819 --> 00:27:36.940
For me, I would do something like.
621
00:27:42.720 --> 00:27:44.589
What do you say?
622
00:27:44.769 --> 00:27:47.049
Gualica Paganini.
623
00:27:47.529 --> 00:27:48.950
Gualica Paganini.
624
00:27:49.130 --> 00:27:52.089
Is that two names or is that like one single?
625
00:27:52.109 --> 00:27:53.089
It's a hyphenated name.
626
00:27:53.130 --> 00:27:53.589
Oh, hyphenated.
627
00:27:53.630 --> 00:27:54.529
Gualina Paganini.
628
00:27:54.769 --> 00:27:55.339
Interesting.
629
00:27:55.630 --> 00:27:57.779
Or Arancini.
630
00:27:58.519 --> 00:28:01.420
Arancini. That is a pretty tight name.
631
00:28:01.440 --> 00:28:02.940
That is a pretty nice name.
632
00:28:02.960 --> 00:28:03.740
What about Rudy?
633
00:28:04.960 --> 00:28:05.900
No, they didn't.
634
00:28:06.160 --> 00:28:06.900
Say Rudy.
635
00:28:06.940 --> 00:28:07.480
Say Rudy.
636
00:28:07.519 --> 00:28:09.700
How does it come off the tongue?
637
00:28:09.900 --> 00:28:10.109
Rudy.
638
00:28:10.180 --> 00:28:10.690
Okay.
639
00:28:10.829 --> 00:28:14.210
You have this affectation like you're imitating a dumb American
640
00:28:14.230 --> 00:28:14.750
when you say.
641
00:28:14.869 --> 00:28:17.089
You did sound a little Cosby at that moment.
642
00:28:17.869 --> 00:28:18.509
Rudy.
643
00:28:18.730 --> 00:28:19.509
No way.
644
00:28:20.049 --> 00:28:20.930
Thanksgiving.
645
00:28:22.069 --> 00:28:24.670
You know, Cosby. It's going to get canceled right now. Yeah,
646
00:28:24.710 --> 00:28:25.710
we can't talk about Cosby.
647
00:28:25.809 --> 00:28:27.650
Do you realize that his name on the show wasn't
648
00:28:27.670 --> 00:28:28.059
just Cliff?
649
00:28:28.099 --> 00:28:29.839
It was Heathcliff? It was Heathcliff Cosby?
650
00:28:29.859 --> 00:28:30.519
Like the famous hat?
651
00:28:30.720 --> 00:28:32.079
Yeah. He was on the show.
652
00:28:32.140 --> 00:28:32.960
Wow.
653
00:28:32.980 --> 00:28:34.059
He was on the Cosby show?
654
00:28:34.619 --> 00:28:35.200
Oh, no.
655
00:28:35.950 --> 00:28:37.710
I said he meant on the Comedy Bang Bang.
656
00:28:37.970 --> 00:28:38.069
Oh.
657
00:28:38.430 --> 00:28:39.170
But I'm thinking. What?
658
00:28:39.829 --> 00:28:39.970
What?
659
00:28:41.029 --> 00:28:43.029
Because in your archives, I thought maybe.
660
00:28:43.089 --> 00:28:45.069
Oh, well, you know. Don't listen to the archives. I
661
00:28:45.089 --> 00:28:47.470
wouldn't fuck in the archives. Yeah. Well, Francesca, I'm sorry
662
00:28:47.490 --> 00:28:49.210
you brought you here. I thought you'd be a person
663
00:28:49.259 --> 00:28:51.210
who'd be excited to come to dinner with me and
664
00:28:51.230 --> 00:28:52.299
Scott and record a special.
665
00:28:52.319 --> 00:28:54.559
I mean, I guess it is fine for me. You know,
666
00:28:54.619 --> 00:28:56.519
it's better than being with my family.
667
00:28:56.539 --> 00:28:59.400
Yeah, or at the store, I guess. Well, I mean,
668
00:28:59.440 --> 00:29:01.720
but you were pulled. It's not Thanksgiving for you in
669
00:29:01.759 --> 00:29:02.460
your reality.
670
00:29:02.480 --> 00:29:03.519
In your reality.
671
00:29:03.579 --> 00:29:05.160
You were pulled from the middle of an episode.
672
00:29:05.259 --> 00:29:07.799
I was pulled from the middle of an episode, yeah.
673
00:29:07.960 --> 00:29:09.119
And how was that episode going?
674
00:29:09.880 --> 00:29:10.700
Oh, so good.
675
00:29:11.200 --> 00:29:18.049
I get so many laughs. Everybody afterward going to tell me, wow,
676
00:29:18.130 --> 00:29:20.700
you blew me away. Scott's going to say, please come back.
677
00:29:20.799 --> 00:29:21.720
Please, please.
678
00:29:21.740 --> 00:29:22.259
I beg you.
679
00:29:22.279 --> 00:29:23.660
I don't remember doing that.
680
00:29:25.559 --> 00:29:27.579
I mean, I just show up in my producer's book guest.
681
00:29:27.829 --> 00:29:28.269
Oh, okay.
682
00:29:28.549 --> 00:29:29.769
Oh, please, Francesca.
683
00:29:29.990 --> 00:29:30.529
We need you.
684
00:29:30.549 --> 00:29:32.289
The show is doing so badly.
685
00:29:32.710 --> 00:29:33.910
Will you please come back?
686
00:29:33.910 --> 00:29:35.990
To be honest, yeah, this sounds kind of familiar. This
687
00:29:35.990 --> 00:29:37.480
is kind of the kind of thing you do. You
688
00:29:37.480 --> 00:29:38.740
get down and like sort of cuck.
689
00:29:39.240 --> 00:29:40.460
Now, Francesca.
690
00:29:41.269 --> 00:29:43.029
I have low T. Yeah, you do have low T.
691
00:29:44.089 --> 00:29:46.309
That's canon in the Speed Force. Now, Francesca.
692
00:29:46.670 --> 00:29:46.990
Yes.
693
00:29:47.730 --> 00:29:50.880
Bed, bath, and holiday. Drowning out the holidays coming up
694
00:29:50.970 --> 00:29:54.039
with the December season coming around. You got Christmas. You
695
00:29:54.059 --> 00:29:55.980
got Kwanzaa. You got Hanukkah.
696
00:29:56.259 --> 00:29:57.099
Boxing Day.
697
00:29:57.119 --> 00:29:59.799
You got Boxing Day. You got New Year's. Boxing Day.
698
00:30:00.039 --> 00:30:03.240
How are things around the store in that time? Do
699
00:30:03.279 --> 00:30:05.759
you start to feel like people are returning less food
700
00:30:05.799 --> 00:30:08.900
and having more fun? Wow, such a good question. I'm
701
00:30:08.960 --> 00:30:09.559
a great interviewer.
702
00:30:10.220 --> 00:30:14.359
I think what happens usually about the Christmas time is
703
00:30:14.420 --> 00:30:17.859
everybody come in, they say, oh my gosh, things are
704
00:30:17.900 --> 00:30:20.819
going crazy for us. We need to come up with
705
00:30:21.200 --> 00:30:25.250
a ham for Thanksgiving. Can you please give us a ham?
706
00:30:25.289 --> 00:30:28.170
They need to come up with a ham for Thanksgiving.
707
00:30:28.190 --> 00:30:31.009
So they're in a bind where they... Something's going on
708
00:30:31.289 --> 00:30:33.569
where they need a ham. And they need to come
709
00:30:33.650 --> 00:30:34.430
up with it.
710
00:30:34.450 --> 00:30:36.170
Please, we have to come up with a ham as
711
00:30:36.210 --> 00:30:36.990
soon as possible.
712
00:30:37.049 --> 00:30:38.549
There's maybe some ham shortage in town.
713
00:30:38.630 --> 00:30:41.390
Are you sure you're not misinterpreting what these people... You
714
00:30:41.430 --> 00:30:43.799
think there's no language barrier thing going on?
715
00:30:44.240 --> 00:30:44.700
Oh, no.
716
00:30:44.779 --> 00:30:47.480
I understand perfectly everything that they say.
717
00:30:47.500 --> 00:30:48.619
So what do you say back to them?
718
00:30:48.700 --> 00:30:50.859
And I say, okay, I have something for you. A
719
00:30:50.859 --> 00:30:52.000
little stuff.
720
00:30:53.029 --> 00:30:57.190
Idiot. So you say it at that volume?
721
00:30:57.210 --> 00:30:59.210
And I give them one of the bed bed and
722
00:30:59.250 --> 00:31:03.589
be on the ham. Bed bed and be on the ham.
723
00:31:04.369 --> 00:31:07.839
And that's what it's called. And then they come back
724
00:31:07.880 --> 00:31:11.410
to me. Oh, it tastes like a wood chip. So
725
00:31:11.470 --> 00:31:15.309
can I get something else? Which for me at this point,
726
00:31:15.410 --> 00:31:17.309
I'm like, well, why you keep coming back here?
727
00:31:17.369 --> 00:31:18.809
You guys see you at Thanksgiving.
728
00:31:18.930 --> 00:31:19.890
I see you now again.
729
00:31:19.910 --> 00:31:23.029
Sounds like they came once and then they were dissatisfied
730
00:31:23.049 --> 00:31:24.710
with the product. So they came back again. That's why
731
00:31:24.730 --> 00:31:25.130
they came back.
732
00:31:25.230 --> 00:31:25.690
Exactly.
733
00:31:25.710 --> 00:31:26.690
They wanted their money back.
734
00:31:27.119 --> 00:31:29.920
So I just tell them, listen, why are you not
735
00:31:29.940 --> 00:31:35.559
taking your big, fat, stupid eye? Go fly into a
736
00:31:35.740 --> 00:31:39.779
river of blood and suck in the blood and die.
737
00:31:40.390 --> 00:31:43.910
You know, Francesca, it sounds like you don't like your job.
738
00:31:44.109 --> 00:31:47.250
I love my job. My favorite job.
739
00:31:47.269 --> 00:31:48.900
Do they love you in it or are they just
740
00:31:48.940 --> 00:31:50.720
concerned that if they were to fire you, it would
741
00:31:50.740 --> 00:31:53.839
be like. you're so short like it's almost like you
742
00:31:53.859 --> 00:31:55.599
have a disability yeah it's kind of like they're just
743
00:31:55.619 --> 00:31:58.039
keeping you on because it's kind of illegal to fire you.
744
00:31:58.000 --> 00:32:00.980
Yeah well they said to me i honestly think they
745
00:32:01.019 --> 00:32:03.789
may not know i still work there oh okay i
746
00:32:03.809 --> 00:32:06.970
guess i basically i am in the deli um inside
747
00:32:07.009 --> 00:32:11.109
of the counter so i kind of hanging out inside
748
00:32:11.150 --> 00:32:14.990
with the meats which is like a mansion to you
749
00:32:15.430 --> 00:32:19.509
It's huge. It smells so good. But my husband always,
750
00:32:19.569 --> 00:32:21.269
why you not come back home?
751
00:32:21.309 --> 00:32:22.410
How big is your husband?
752
00:32:23.079 --> 00:32:25.140
He's 10 feet.
753
00:32:25.140 --> 00:32:27.019
10 feet tall?
754
00:32:27.019 --> 00:32:27.700
10 feet.
755
00:32:27.839 --> 00:32:30.660
This is a fucked up relationship. But you got to
756
00:32:30.680 --> 00:32:33.539
be thankful because you've got yourself a fine, tall man.
757
00:32:33.559 --> 00:32:36.640
I am very thankful because that is the number one
758
00:32:36.700 --> 00:32:38.039
most important thing for a woman.
759
00:32:38.359 --> 00:32:39.720
Find a tall man.
760
00:32:39.740 --> 00:32:41.619
Does he think you're a pet?
761
00:32:43.529 --> 00:32:45.190
Are you married to him or does he think you're
762
00:32:45.210 --> 00:32:46.450
like a cat or something like that?
763
00:32:46.519 --> 00:32:49.599
Well, he put me in his pocket. We can walk
764
00:32:49.640 --> 00:32:51.259
around the neighborhood.
765
00:32:51.299 --> 00:32:52.119
He show me off.
766
00:32:52.200 --> 00:32:56.880
He say, please don't touch. This is mine. This sounds
767
00:32:56.900 --> 00:32:57.700
like a relationship.
768
00:32:58.220 --> 00:33:01.619
This sounds like a healthy man and woman relationship. This
769
00:33:01.660 --> 00:33:01.980
is an arrow.
770
00:33:07.740 --> 00:33:12.380
Mmm, and this is the sound of its minty bubbles.
771
00:33:14.670 --> 00:33:23.000
Conjuring melt in your mouth, pure bubbly joy. Melt into
772
00:33:23.039 --> 00:33:26.359
the moment with Aero's delicious peppermint bubbles.
773
00:33:27.480 --> 00:33:29.880
Aero, feel the bubbles melt.
774
00:33:33.750 --> 00:33:37.670
Following Aldi's big price drop announcement, we've got more good news.
775
00:33:38.210 --> 00:33:42.289
The kids are going back to school. And we're dropping
776
00:33:42.549 --> 00:33:46.529
even more prices on loads of back-to-school favourites, from pressed
777
00:33:46.609 --> 00:33:49.509
apple juice to Brannan's lasagne. And we're not just dropping
778
00:33:49.529 --> 00:33:53.990
this week. No, these prices are sticking around, unlike the
779
00:33:54.029 --> 00:33:59.109
school holidays. Saving up to 20% on your back-to-school shop.
780
00:33:59.390 --> 00:34:02.960
It's not complicated at Aldi. Visit aldi.ie slash price drop
781
00:34:02.980 --> 00:34:03.619
for more information.
782
00:34:04.059 --> 00:34:09.260
My home is my castle. My sing-in-the-shower place or work-in-my-undies place.
783
00:34:09.820 --> 00:34:13.840
My pizza for breakfast. Cornflakes for dinner place. My home
784
00:34:13.960 --> 00:34:14.940
is my me place.
785
00:34:15.519 --> 00:34:18.199
With AXA Home Insurance, you can protect the place where
786
00:34:18.239 --> 00:34:22.079
you can truly be yourself and get 24-hour emergency home
787
00:34:22.099 --> 00:34:23.469
assistance as standard.
788
00:34:23.719 --> 00:34:26.030
Get a quote online or call into your local branch.
789
00:34:26.570 --> 00:34:26.949
AXA.
790
00:34:28.429 --> 00:34:29.070
Know you can.
791
00:34:29.429 --> 00:34:32.309
Policy terms and conditions apply. AXA Insurance stack is regulated
792
00:34:32.329 --> 00:34:33.489
by the Central Bank of Ireland.
793
00:34:36.010 --> 00:34:38.360
Wow, well, Francesca, thank you for being here. I didn't
794
00:34:38.380 --> 00:34:40.300
know you hated Thanksgiving. I wouldn't have pulled you here
795
00:34:40.320 --> 00:34:41.780
if I knew you hated Thanksgiving.
796
00:34:41.800 --> 00:34:42.380
No, it's fine.
797
00:34:42.480 --> 00:34:45.460
I'm happy to see you, but not Scott.
798
00:34:45.579 --> 00:34:46.239
Oh, wow.
799
00:34:46.420 --> 00:34:48.659
Jeez, man. This is really putting a damper on my
800
00:34:48.679 --> 00:34:49.139
good time.
801
00:34:49.179 --> 00:34:52.650
Sorry. You know what, Scott? Don't mind Francesca. She's here.
802
00:34:52.670 --> 00:34:54.769
She's going to have a great time. Okay. Maybe I
803
00:34:54.789 --> 00:34:57.090
should pull... Get a good guest. Let me get a
804
00:34:57.110 --> 00:35:00.909
good guest. You know what? You're a great guest, but
805
00:35:00.969 --> 00:35:03.780
I'm going to get a Hall of Fame guest. Okay, yeah, great.
806
00:35:03.840 --> 00:35:05.820
Now we're going to get all the famed guests. We're
807
00:35:05.840 --> 00:35:08.059
going to get to really celebrate this thing. Let's get
808
00:35:08.079 --> 00:35:08.940
the fam, Scott.
809
00:35:09.019 --> 00:35:10.059
Okay, yeah, the fam.
810
00:35:10.099 --> 00:35:11.099
Here we go. Here we go.
811
00:35:11.199 --> 00:35:19.829
I'm running into the speed force. Ah, my nose is
812
00:35:19.849 --> 00:35:21.989
bleeding this time. Oh my gosh.
813
00:35:22.469 --> 00:35:27.070
Scott, I have pulled from episode 641.
814
00:35:27.050 --> 00:35:27.099
641.
815
00:35:27.070 --> 00:35:32.820
I'm trying to remember. What was that? 641. Somewhere where
816
00:35:32.880 --> 00:35:36.360
you were definitely not saying anything cancelable by that time. No, yeah.
817
00:35:36.380 --> 00:35:40.269
But he's one of your favorite guests, Scott. Dash Grabham
818
00:35:40.369 --> 00:35:43.449
is here. Scott?
819
00:35:43.469 --> 00:35:43.539
Hey.
820
00:35:43.610 --> 00:35:44.769
You remember Dash Grabham, right?
821
00:35:45.110 --> 00:35:46.590
Yeah, I remember Dash Grabham.
822
00:35:46.929 --> 00:35:49.010
Yeah, last time I left, I heard you shouting from
823
00:35:49.050 --> 00:35:52.349
the room, I don't know anything that guy just said.
824
00:35:53.130 --> 00:35:54.690
I'd rather he didn't come back.
825
00:35:54.789 --> 00:35:57.409
He was confusing. Is that really what happened?
826
00:35:57.570 --> 00:35:58.260
When I left?
827
00:35:58.320 --> 00:35:58.579
Yeah.
828
00:35:58.619 --> 00:36:00.659
Yeah, he thought he couldn't hear me, but I was hiding.
829
00:36:01.519 --> 00:36:01.760
What?
830
00:36:01.920 --> 00:36:02.619
You were hiding?
831
00:36:02.800 --> 00:36:03.119
Yeah.
832
00:36:03.179 --> 00:36:04.440
Like Jay Leno style?
833
00:36:04.559 --> 00:36:05.039
Who's that?
834
00:36:05.820 --> 00:36:08.260
Oh, he's not a Pokemon. I saw your eyes light up.
835
00:36:09.159 --> 00:36:10.920
I'll catch a Jay Leno and I'll add him to
836
00:36:10.969 --> 00:36:11.800
my collection.
837
00:36:11.820 --> 00:36:13.610
Trying to think of what his strengths might be and
838
00:36:13.630 --> 00:36:14.250
his weaknesses.
839
00:36:14.949 --> 00:36:19.670
Sounds like a denim type to me. anyway i do
840
00:36:19.690 --> 00:36:21.250
a lot of heart you got to be hiding all
841
00:36:21.289 --> 00:36:21.849
the time oh.
842
00:36:21.929 --> 00:36:24.989
Well dash i'm sorry that's the way that episode ended
843
00:36:25.030 --> 00:36:27.380
but i wanted to welcome you to speed force thanksgiving
844
00:36:27.400 --> 00:36:30.380
hey thanks who are you oh i'm rudy north of
845
00:36:30.480 --> 00:36:33.119
course whoa you want to listen to my previously on
846
00:36:33.420 --> 00:36:37.159
what's that never mind yeah yeah now dash um thank
847
00:36:37.179 --> 00:36:39.659
you for being here i wanted to um introduce you
848
00:36:39.719 --> 00:36:42.269
to uh francesca bolognese.
849
00:36:41.670 --> 00:36:45.150
Hi francesca hi nice to meet you and um i.
850
00:36:48.409 --> 00:36:49.630
No, she's great.
851
00:36:49.769 --> 00:36:50.599
She is, isn't she?
852
00:36:50.610 --> 00:36:51.570
She's so small.
853
00:36:51.730 --> 00:36:54.190
Yeah, she's about as big as a Pokemon, right? Yeah, Dash,
854
00:36:54.230 --> 00:36:56.829
or maybe not. Maybe Pokemons are huge. I have no idea.
855
00:36:57.090 --> 00:37:00.880
Yeah, you know, you just described two different options for Pokemon, Scott.
856
00:37:00.920 --> 00:37:02.619
Some are small, some are big.
857
00:37:02.639 --> 00:37:05.559
The world is wide and full of wonder, and each
858
00:37:05.579 --> 00:37:08.039
and every Pokemon is different and unique in its own way,
859
00:37:08.400 --> 00:37:11.199
but they all have lessons to teach us if we're
860
00:37:11.320 --> 00:37:12.320
only wise enough to learn.
861
00:37:12.440 --> 00:37:13.000
To listen.
862
00:37:13.539 --> 00:37:13.920
Wow.
863
00:37:13.940 --> 00:37:15.900
This guy sucks.
864
00:37:15.960 --> 00:37:18.000
And then we take them and we make them fight
865
00:37:18.019 --> 00:37:20.059
in brutal battles against each other.
866
00:37:20.239 --> 00:37:22.460
Squinching the earth beneath them.
867
00:37:23.079 --> 00:37:26.320
Asserting dominance over each other to win trophy and money
868
00:37:26.380 --> 00:37:28.159
money prizes.
869
00:37:28.780 --> 00:37:32.010
That's a lot to take in. Sure. Now, thank you
870
00:37:32.030 --> 00:37:33.929
for being here. I'm really happy to be here. Just
871
00:37:33.949 --> 00:37:35.349
wanted to repeat that for Scott.
872
00:37:35.409 --> 00:37:37.530
I'm happy to be anywhere all the time.
873
00:37:37.610 --> 00:37:39.550
I'm pretty medium about being here.
874
00:37:39.590 --> 00:37:43.530
We know that Francesca. Now, what's your relationship to Thanksgiving, Dash?
875
00:37:43.570 --> 00:37:47.769
Are you a celebrator of Thanksgiving? Do you have it
876
00:37:47.829 --> 00:37:48.429
in the canto region?
877
00:37:48.469 --> 00:37:50.489
That's right from Scott, you remember.
878
00:37:50.570 --> 00:37:51.489
Right, Scott.
879
00:37:51.679 --> 00:37:54.320
You do like this guy. There's a lot of innkeepers
880
00:37:54.380 --> 00:37:54.780
who have.
881
00:37:55.670 --> 00:37:58.670
food they got food yeah they got there's a lot
882
00:37:58.710 --> 00:38:01.849
of hospitals there's a lot of police stations there's a
883
00:38:01.849 --> 00:38:06.030
lot of italian restaurants where mob bosses hide there's a
884
00:38:06.110 --> 00:38:09.409
lot of bushes that you cannot get through okay i've
885
00:38:09.429 --> 00:38:11.309
seen bushes in this world and you can just like
886
00:38:11.389 --> 00:38:12.489
go through those bad.
887
00:38:12.289 --> 00:38:14.590
Boys yeah i mean you're bigger than a bush these
888
00:38:14.630 --> 00:38:16.590
are rock solid bushes you try to go through these
889
00:38:16.690 --> 00:38:21.139
bushes you can't do it Okay, but what about Thanksgiving?
890
00:38:21.739 --> 00:38:22.159
What's that?
891
00:38:22.179 --> 00:38:23.239
Oh, yeah.
892
00:38:23.539 --> 00:38:24.599
No, we don't have that.
893
00:38:24.679 --> 00:38:27.579
As I understand it, that's the holiday that y'all celebrate
894
00:38:28.039 --> 00:38:32.360
where you sort of celebrate your sort of subjugation of
895
00:38:32.780 --> 00:38:35.880
the Native people of this land that you then took.
896
00:38:35.920 --> 00:38:37.860
And they're like, can we have it back? And everyone
897
00:38:37.880 --> 00:38:40.380
thinks that that would be ridiculous for some reason.
898
00:38:40.500 --> 00:38:43.400
Right. Well, today we're celebrating Skanksgiving, so you don't got
899
00:38:43.420 --> 00:38:44.000
to worry about anything.
900
00:38:44.079 --> 00:38:46.309
Oh, I tell you about my sexy Halloween costume?
901
00:38:46.429 --> 00:38:49.309
Okay, yeah. Where were you? I guess that, yeah, let's
902
00:38:49.329 --> 00:38:49.769
hear about it.
903
00:38:49.769 --> 00:38:53.070
I was like, sex. Sea bicycle.
904
00:38:53.309 --> 00:38:55.489
Okay. Wow. Sexy bicycle.
905
00:38:55.590 --> 00:38:56.130
Yeah.
906
00:38:56.190 --> 00:38:56.909
How does that work?
907
00:38:56.929 --> 00:38:59.409
You know, you got on a bicycle and you can
908
00:38:59.449 --> 00:39:02.190
suddenly go so much faster than you could before.
909
00:39:02.289 --> 00:39:02.769
Okay.
910
00:39:02.809 --> 00:39:03.070
Yeah.
911
00:39:03.329 --> 00:39:04.829
We're waiting for the sexy part.
912
00:39:04.949 --> 00:39:05.409
What do you mean?
913
00:39:05.469 --> 00:39:06.409
That's the sexy part.
914
00:39:06.449 --> 00:39:07.840
You can go so much.
915
00:39:07.719 --> 00:39:10.000
Faster than you could if you were just walking around
916
00:39:10.019 --> 00:39:11.860
because now you're a sexy bicycle.
917
00:39:11.880 --> 00:39:14.079
Okay.
918
00:39:14.099 --> 00:39:16.440
I don't think going fast is what you want in sex.
919
00:39:16.480 --> 00:39:19.139
I think you usually want to go slow and long
920
00:39:19.199 --> 00:39:20.000
from what I've heard.
921
00:39:20.039 --> 00:39:21.760
I'm going to be totally honest with you, Scott.
922
00:39:22.670 --> 00:39:26.369
I am not 100% certain on what sexiness is.
923
00:39:26.869 --> 00:39:29.989
Oh. Have you ever been in a relationship, Dash?
924
00:39:30.010 --> 00:39:30.079
Yes.
925
00:39:30.449 --> 00:39:31.550
Because how old are you again?
926
00:39:31.949 --> 00:39:32.269
Twelve.
927
00:39:32.590 --> 00:39:33.880
Right. Okay.
928
00:39:33.909 --> 00:39:35.909
You're a little baby boy.
929
00:39:36.030 --> 00:39:39.420
How do people reproduce in Kanto region? I mean, is
930
00:39:39.480 --> 00:39:40.980
it something that you learn in school?
931
00:39:41.000 --> 00:39:43.099
I'm not supposed to say, but you say I can
932
00:39:43.139 --> 00:39:43.440
say it?
933
00:39:43.519 --> 00:39:44.340
Yeah, you can say it.
934
00:39:44.619 --> 00:39:45.239
Fuck, Rudy.
935
00:39:45.900 --> 00:39:49.099
Oh, geez. What did you say? What was it?
936
00:39:49.420 --> 00:39:49.619
Ash.
937
00:39:49.840 --> 00:39:51.190
You can say it out loud. You can say it
938
00:39:51.210 --> 00:39:51.389
out loud.
939
00:39:51.409 --> 00:39:54.000
Fuck, that's how they do it. Okay.
940
00:39:54.039 --> 00:39:55.639
Do you ever see people doing it?
941
00:39:56.019 --> 00:39:57.199
I mean, they don't know.
942
00:39:57.400 --> 00:39:58.320
I'm sneaking around.
943
00:39:58.400 --> 00:39:59.500
I'm not supposed to know.
944
00:39:59.599 --> 00:40:01.420
Well, I don't do it.
945
00:40:01.469 --> 00:40:04.250
I don't purposely try to find people having sex. But
946
00:40:04.309 --> 00:40:06.329
as I said before, I'm always hiding.
947
00:40:06.449 --> 00:40:06.670
Yeah.
948
00:40:06.690 --> 00:40:08.730
Well, sometimes you're in a place and people don't know
949
00:40:08.769 --> 00:40:12.389
you're there. I'm just trying to catch a zigzagoon. I'm
950
00:40:12.409 --> 00:40:13.809
just hanging out trying to find a.
951
00:40:15.329 --> 00:40:16.110
Zigzagoon.
952
00:40:16.289 --> 00:40:17.030
And then you're there.
953
00:40:17.150 --> 00:40:19.269
All of a sudden. And then people start having sex.
954
00:40:19.429 --> 00:40:20.170
Ooh, there's no one there.
955
00:40:20.190 --> 00:40:22.570
It's bad for two reasons. One, now I got to
956
00:40:22.610 --> 00:40:26.130
watch sex. Dude, you scared away all the zigzagoon.
957
00:40:26.150 --> 00:40:26.230
Yeah.
958
00:40:26.389 --> 00:40:29.900
You seem to like the sex though. You say it's kind.
959
00:40:29.780 --> 00:40:30.559
Of fun, no?
960
00:40:30.679 --> 00:40:31.699
I feel torn about it.
961
00:40:31.699 --> 00:40:33.300
On the one hand, I'm like, ew.
962
00:40:33.460 --> 00:40:35.000
On the other hand, I'm like, okay.
963
00:40:36.889 --> 00:40:38.789
What's the best sex you've ever seen?
964
00:40:39.289 --> 00:40:40.309
Okay. Describe it.
965
00:40:40.409 --> 00:40:41.889
Apart from the zigzagoon part.
966
00:40:42.230 --> 00:40:44.849
Yeah, I guess if the zigzagoon got in there, sure.
967
00:40:44.889 --> 00:40:46.710
Well, it didn't, but then they left and then I
968
00:40:46.750 --> 00:40:47.809
caught a zigzagoon.
969
00:40:47.969 --> 00:40:48.429
Oh, okay.
970
00:40:48.449 --> 00:40:49.449
So that's what made it good for you.
971
00:40:49.469 --> 00:40:50.840
That was the best sex.
972
00:40:50.989 --> 00:40:53.260
That sex ended with me having a zigzagoon.
973
00:40:53.380 --> 00:40:55.300
Do I want to ask what a zigzagoon is?
974
00:40:56.139 --> 00:40:58.119
Um, yeah. Okay.
975
00:40:58.300 --> 00:40:58.519
Okay.
976
00:40:58.840 --> 00:40:59.539
Oh, you do?
977
00:40:59.619 --> 00:41:00.820
So... It's okay.
978
00:41:00.840 --> 00:41:02.159
What is it?
979
00:41:02.199 --> 00:41:03.920
In your world, you know, like a raccoon?
980
00:41:03.940 --> 00:41:04.659
Mm-hmm.
981
00:41:04.840 --> 00:41:05.579
Take the nose.
982
00:41:06.139 --> 00:41:06.440
Okay.
983
00:41:06.460 --> 00:41:07.079
Pull it out.
984
00:41:07.099 --> 00:41:08.139
Okay.
985
00:41:08.159 --> 00:41:10.699
Now it's far away from where it was before. It's
986
00:41:10.760 --> 00:41:11.550
long and pointy.
987
00:41:11.710 --> 00:41:11.949
Mm-hmm.
988
00:41:12.090 --> 00:41:14.849
Now take the stripes. Run those bad boys all the
989
00:41:14.889 --> 00:41:16.250
way up and down that raccoon.
990
00:41:16.690 --> 00:41:18.130
Just drive from tip to tail.
991
00:41:18.210 --> 00:41:18.530
Okay.
992
00:41:18.650 --> 00:41:20.369
Now give it powers, Rudy.
993
00:41:20.769 --> 00:41:22.710
Okay, I know my powers. Give it fighting powers!
994
00:41:22.730 --> 00:41:22.949
Okay.
995
00:41:24.250 --> 00:41:24.610
All right.
996
00:41:24.650 --> 00:41:25.869
That's a zigzagoon.
997
00:41:26.150 --> 00:41:26.489
Okay.
998
00:41:26.510 --> 00:41:27.949
I guess I'd rather watch people fucking.
999
00:41:27.969 --> 00:41:29.150
I choose a zigzagoon.
1000
00:41:29.170 --> 00:41:29.769
You know what I mean?
1001
00:41:29.789 --> 00:41:31.170
I don't. No.
1002
00:41:31.230 --> 00:41:33.050
I choose a zigzagoon every day.
1003
00:41:33.210 --> 00:41:34.329
Oh, God. What does that mean?
1004
00:41:34.349 --> 00:41:36.920
Wait, are you having sex with a zigzagoon that you've enslaved?
1005
00:41:36.980 --> 00:41:37.820
Dash, you can say it.
1006
00:41:38.159 --> 00:41:38.800
I don't think so.
1007
00:41:39.739 --> 00:41:40.409
Okay, okay.
1008
00:41:40.570 --> 00:41:42.610
What are you doing with it? Because maybe you don't
1009
00:41:42.630 --> 00:41:43.309
know what sex is.
1010
00:41:43.429 --> 00:41:45.389
I say, zigzagoon, scratch.
1011
00:41:46.210 --> 00:41:52.030
Okay. Or I say, zigzagoon, dig. Oh, shut it real loud. Okay, okay.
1012
00:41:52.050 --> 00:41:52.820
And then he does it.
1013
00:41:53.010 --> 00:41:54.210
Okay, interesting.
1014
00:41:54.449 --> 00:41:57.320
Do you still have Andy Richter in your Pokemon?
1015
00:41:57.500 --> 00:42:01.980
No, I did have a long conversation with Officer Jenny,
1016
00:42:02.340 --> 00:42:06.070
who said, you can't. take Andy Richter.
1017
00:42:05.730 --> 00:42:07.750
Around with you in a little tiny void.
1018
00:42:07.769 --> 00:42:09.869
Right, because he has actual humans.
1019
00:42:10.210 --> 00:42:12.860
Yeah, which I sort of knew, but it's one of
1020
00:42:12.900 --> 00:42:16.420
those laws that it's like, You gotta, as a Pokemon trainer,
1021
00:42:16.440 --> 00:42:17.880
you gotta push the boundaries, right?
1022
00:42:17.900 --> 00:42:18.159
Oh, sure, yeah.
1023
00:42:18.179 --> 00:42:19.599
If you wanna be the very best like no one
1024
00:42:19.840 --> 00:42:22.239
ever was, you gotta be willing to sort of break
1025
00:42:22.280 --> 00:42:22.840
a few eggs.
1026
00:42:22.880 --> 00:42:23.820
You wanna make an omelet.
1027
00:42:23.880 --> 00:42:26.349
I know it's a more recent law, but yeah, you
1028
00:42:26.369 --> 00:42:29.909
can't really keep humans anymore. You can keep animals, though,
1029
00:42:29.929 --> 00:42:32.010
and make them do whatever you want, usually. Yeah.
1030
00:42:32.110 --> 00:42:34.230
Now, I kinda see you right now sort of edging
1031
00:42:34.289 --> 00:42:36.130
over to Francesca with that little.
1032
00:42:36.739 --> 00:42:38.079
Yeah, with your Pokemon ball.
1033
00:42:38.300 --> 00:42:39.940
What is it? I don't think you should try to
1034
00:42:40.000 --> 00:42:41.659
capture it. She is a guest of ours.
1035
00:42:41.679 --> 00:42:43.719
Okay, but she's like so small.
1036
00:42:43.860 --> 00:42:44.179
I know.
1037
00:42:44.239 --> 00:42:45.179
She's very short.
1038
00:42:45.219 --> 00:42:47.829
She also doesn't have any pubic hair. She doesn't have any.
1039
00:42:48.079 --> 00:42:50.389
Don't you dare talk about my pubic hair, Scott, you
1040
00:42:50.469 --> 00:42:51.159
fucking creep.
1041
00:42:51.320 --> 00:42:52.320
You talked about it first.
1042
00:42:52.340 --> 00:42:53.619
How dare you talk about my pubic hair?
1043
00:42:53.659 --> 00:42:55.900
You were so proud. What the fuck is wrong with you?
1044
00:42:55.909 --> 00:42:58.489
It makes you look like a Pokemon because Pokemons don't
1045
00:42:58.530 --> 00:42:59.570
have pubic hair, right?
1046
00:42:59.690 --> 00:42:59.869
Right?
1047
00:42:59.929 --> 00:43:00.889
Help me out here, Dash.
1048
00:43:01.469 --> 00:43:03.150
Some of them got so much, Scott.
1049
00:43:03.170 --> 00:43:04.949
Oh. Like which ones?
1050
00:43:05.250 --> 00:43:06.869
Like the real fluffy ones.
1051
00:43:07.230 --> 00:43:07.969
That's pubics.
1052
00:43:08.530 --> 00:43:09.690
Like Ursaring.
1053
00:43:09.710 --> 00:43:12.380
That's pubics.
1054
00:43:12.719 --> 00:43:14.619
You know, you say some of these references, they kind
1055
00:43:14.659 --> 00:43:16.000
of go over by Scott's head.
1056
00:43:16.079 --> 00:43:16.420
Sure.
1057
00:43:16.619 --> 00:43:19.639
But could you, here's what I want to ask you, Dash.
1058
00:43:19.719 --> 00:43:20.260
Okay.
1059
00:43:20.559 --> 00:43:22.800
Because I'm tired of talking about this Pokemon bullshit.
1060
00:43:22.860 --> 00:43:24.170
Yeah, move on.
1061
00:43:24.170 --> 00:43:24.829
Away from it.
1062
00:43:25.389 --> 00:43:28.610
Dash, it's Thanksgiving here in the Speed Force. Thanksgiving.
1063
00:43:28.630 --> 00:43:28.869
Thanksgiving.
1064
00:43:29.440 --> 00:43:33.309
Hashtag skanksgiving. Hashtag skanksgiving, Rudy Scott. What do you have
1065
00:43:33.369 --> 00:43:35.969
to be thankful for this season, Dash?
1066
00:43:36.110 --> 00:43:40.210
Well, I found something recently that really changed my life
1067
00:43:40.269 --> 00:43:41.010
a lot, Rudy.
1068
00:43:41.190 --> 00:43:42.949
And I'm very, very thankful for it. Wow.
1069
00:43:42.969 --> 00:43:43.760
Religion? Religion?
1070
00:43:44.820 --> 00:43:45.900
In a way it is now.
1071
00:43:45.920 --> 00:43:46.480
Okay.
1072
00:43:46.719 --> 00:43:47.920
I found rare candy.
1073
00:43:49.400 --> 00:43:50.679
You found rare candy?
1074
00:43:50.699 --> 00:43:51.719
I found rare candy.
1075
00:43:51.739 --> 00:43:53.920
Like it's not cooked all the way through?
1076
00:43:53.960 --> 00:43:54.320
Yeah.
1077
00:43:55.059 --> 00:43:55.539
You know that?
1078
00:43:56.000 --> 00:43:57.840
Like a well done Reese's Pieces?
1079
00:43:57.860 --> 00:44:00.480
That might be true. I don't know what it is.
1080
00:44:00.500 --> 00:44:02.039
I don't know where it comes from.
1081
00:44:02.059 --> 00:44:04.860
I find it in the weirdest places. Sometimes in boxes.
1082
00:44:05.260 --> 00:44:07.719
Sometimes in the corpses of Pokemon who I have defeated.
1083
00:44:07.909 --> 00:44:09.730
Did you bring any for our feast today?
1084
00:44:09.750 --> 00:44:11.510
Yeah, you want some? Here, take some.
1085
00:44:11.809 --> 00:44:13.929
That's how you share food for Thanksgiving, right?
1086
00:44:13.949 --> 00:44:15.269
This is so rare.
1087
00:44:15.349 --> 00:44:16.460
Let me tell you, if you eat.
1088
00:44:18.489 --> 00:44:18.789
This.
1089
00:44:19.070 --> 00:44:20.070
Okay.
1090
00:44:20.349 --> 00:44:21.250
Can I say it, Rudy?
1091
00:44:21.690 --> 00:44:22.429
You can say it, Dash.
1092
00:44:22.449 --> 00:44:23.570
You're going to.
1093
00:44:23.530 --> 00:44:26.570
Feel fucking fantastic. Boy, Dash is growing up.
1094
00:44:26.670 --> 00:44:28.170
He's at that age where it's.
1095
00:44:27.969 --> 00:44:28.750
Really fun to curse.
1096
00:44:28.769 --> 00:44:31.739
In the Speed Force, time moves a little bit differently.
1097
00:44:31.820 --> 00:44:33.500
It's going to make you feel strong.
1098
00:44:34.059 --> 00:44:34.500
Okay.
1099
00:44:34.719 --> 00:44:36.559
It's going to make your bones grow.
1100
00:44:36.780 --> 00:44:38.460
Now, hold on. Oh, I don't want that.
1101
00:44:38.559 --> 00:44:39.719
I like being small.
1102
00:44:39.739 --> 00:44:40.320
You do?
1103
00:44:41.219 --> 00:44:41.619
Yes.
1104
00:44:42.179 --> 00:44:42.460
Okay.
1105
00:44:43.260 --> 00:44:45.340
Dash, this thing you put in front of us kind
1106
00:44:45.360 --> 00:44:49.239
of looks like a couple lines of powder and What
1107
00:44:49.280 --> 00:44:50.300
are we supposed to do with this?
1108
00:44:50.570 --> 00:44:52.670
I think you put it right up your nose.
1109
00:44:52.769 --> 00:44:56.050
Okay. Should we do some of this?
1110
00:44:56.250 --> 00:44:58.909
I guess we should. A man in the corner gave
1111
00:44:58.949 --> 00:45:00.840
me this one. I said, do you have any rare candy?
1112
00:45:00.860 --> 00:45:01.960
He said, nose candy?
1113
00:45:02.099 --> 00:45:02.469
I said, yes.
1114
00:45:02.500 --> 00:45:04.920
I don't want to insult Dash over here.
1115
00:45:05.019 --> 00:45:05.440
Oh, shit!
1116
00:45:09.139 --> 00:45:10.260
Oh, fuck.
1117
00:45:10.679 --> 00:45:11.860
I take it too much.
1118
00:45:12.199 --> 00:45:12.500
You okay?
1119
00:45:12.539 --> 00:45:15.000
Francesca, you okay? That was just a regular line, but
1120
00:45:15.019 --> 00:45:17.530
to her, it's like a giant. I can't feel my
1121
00:45:17.590 --> 00:45:18.530
tongue or my head.
1122
00:45:18.550 --> 00:45:18.869
It's okay.
1123
00:45:18.909 --> 00:45:20.949
That's your tongue and head leveling up.
1124
00:45:21.690 --> 00:45:23.900
I got to say, I am feeling very good right now.
1125
00:45:23.909 --> 00:45:24.650
I feel really good right now.
1126
00:45:24.670 --> 00:45:24.909
This is good.
1127
00:45:24.929 --> 00:45:25.849

1128
00:45:25.869 --> 00:45:27.010

1129
00:45:27.030 --> 00:45:28.289

1130
00:45:28.309 --> 00:45:29.639

1131
00:45:29.659 --> 00:45:30.980

1132
00:45:31.000 --> 00:45:32.340

1133
00:45:32.360 --> 00:45:33.599

1134
00:45:33.619 --> 00:45:35.940
Dash, I'm so glad you came through with
1135
00:45:35.960 --> 00:45:38.420
that rare candy. Thank you so much for being here, Dash.
1136
00:45:38.500 --> 00:45:38.840
My pleasure.
1137
00:45:38.860 --> 00:45:41.380
I also brought curry. It's the only thing we eat, really,
1138
00:45:41.420 --> 00:45:42.280
most of the time.
1139
00:45:42.360 --> 00:45:42.800
Curry?
1140
00:45:42.880 --> 00:45:43.320
Curry.
1141
00:45:43.340 --> 00:45:44.199
A bunch of curry.
1142
00:45:44.599 --> 00:45:46.469
Okay, well, maybe I'll pass on the curry, but if
1143
00:45:46.489 --> 00:45:48.210
you have any more of that fun candy.
1144
00:45:48.230 --> 00:45:49.789
Yeah, if you got any more of that rare candy, like,
1145
00:45:49.969 --> 00:45:50.750
stop holding out on it.
1146
00:45:50.750 --> 00:45:52.570
Well, I gotta give some to the Zig Zagoon, but
1147
00:45:52.590 --> 00:45:53.550
you'll share what I got.
1148
00:45:54.360 --> 00:45:57.579
Okay sure yeah okay but maybe yeah maybe me and
1149
00:45:57.599 --> 00:45:59.500
scott could put some money together and then you could
1150
00:45:59.539 --> 00:46:00.699
go hit up your guy your.
1151
00:46:00.579 --> 00:46:02.619
Guy yeah who has all the the guy in the
1152
00:46:02.659 --> 00:46:04.900
corner where was he you said is he in the kanto.
1153
00:46:04.639 --> 00:46:06.820
Region i wish i could remember no he's here.
1154
00:46:06.699 --> 00:46:09.300
He's here okay cool he's here at the speed force
1155
00:46:09.380 --> 00:46:13.679
yeah okay i might know this guy this might be
1156
00:46:13.699 --> 00:46:14.519
black racer to be.
1157
00:46:14.440 --> 00:46:16.469
Honest okay i don't want to see black racer.
1158
00:46:16.619 --> 00:46:19.739
You don't want to be broke up And it's black
1159
00:46:19.800 --> 00:46:22.619
because his costume is black. Yeah, no, we're not talking
1160
00:46:22.719 --> 00:46:26.880
about Jesse Owens or anything like that. Oh, Dash, man,
1161
00:46:27.119 --> 00:46:29.980
thank you so much. Dash, you have brought in some
1162
00:46:30.099 --> 00:46:33.590
energy that maybe Francesca did not bring in. What the heck?
1163
00:46:33.619 --> 00:46:35.650
It's your fucking problem.
1164
00:46:35.989 --> 00:46:37.670
It might have been my fault. I might have pulled
1165
00:46:37.869 --> 00:46:39.590
some of the wrong. You know, Scott, I haven't used
1166
00:46:39.630 --> 00:46:41.070
my powers in a long time.
1167
00:46:41.130 --> 00:46:41.730
No, yeah.
1168
00:46:41.809 --> 00:46:43.889
So I'm pulling people out. I feel like I have
1169
00:46:43.929 --> 00:46:44.610
powers right now.
1170
00:46:44.710 --> 00:46:46.530
You're pulling a group of people that were supposed to
1171
00:46:46.650 --> 00:46:48.489
alienate Scott, make him feel alone?
1172
00:46:48.710 --> 00:46:49.110
No!
1173
00:46:49.690 --> 00:46:49.809
Oh.
1174
00:46:49.949 --> 00:46:51.750
Oh, is that what I was... Okay, that might have
1175
00:46:51.769 --> 00:46:52.389
been the mistake.
1176
00:46:52.530 --> 00:46:54.809
Yeah, because so far with these first two guests, it
1177
00:46:54.849 --> 00:46:57.260
seems like, you know, they're not my favorite guests.
1178
00:46:57.280 --> 00:46:57.670
No, no, no.
1179
00:46:57.679 --> 00:46:59.380
I no longer can feel my leg.
1180
00:46:59.719 --> 00:47:01.019
Okay, you'll be okay, Francesca.
1181
00:47:01.059 --> 00:47:01.340
My leg.
1182
00:47:01.579 --> 00:47:05.019
You'll be okay. Just lean up against that matchbox. Now, okay.
1183
00:47:05.360 --> 00:47:05.780
You know what?
1184
00:47:06.099 --> 00:47:08.679
Here's a little champagne. You know, one of those things
1185
00:47:08.699 --> 00:47:11.800
you want to twist off of it. Just sit on this. Oh,
1186
00:47:11.820 --> 00:47:12.840
you mean a cork?
1187
00:47:12.860 --> 00:47:13.179
Yeah.
1188
00:47:13.219 --> 00:47:15.119
No, not a cork, but the little metal thing.
1189
00:47:15.139 --> 00:47:15.980
Oh, the little metal thing.
1190
00:47:16.000 --> 00:47:17.309
Yeah, this is like a beach chair for you.
1191
00:47:17.320 --> 00:47:19.260
It does look like a tiny stool when you take
1192
00:47:19.300 --> 00:47:20.489
off the top of the champagne.
1193
00:47:20.630 --> 00:47:21.110
Exactly.
1194
00:47:21.150 --> 00:47:21.929
Thank you so much.
1195
00:47:21.969 --> 00:47:23.329
Rudy, can I have the champagne?
1196
00:47:23.510 --> 00:47:25.570
Dash, you can have a little bit of champagne just
1197
00:47:25.610 --> 00:47:26.449
because it's the holiday.
1198
00:47:26.550 --> 00:47:27.750
I'm going to drink all of it, okay?
1199
00:47:28.030 --> 00:47:28.349
All right.
1200
00:47:28.389 --> 00:47:29.170
Do whatever you want.
1201
00:47:30.329 --> 00:47:30.570
Wow.
1202
00:47:30.690 --> 00:47:34.039
Okay, you know what, Scott? I might have fucked up.
1203
00:47:34.570 --> 00:47:34.869
Really?
1204
00:47:35.030 --> 00:47:37.519
I might have fucked up. I was underestimating the level
1205
00:47:37.539 --> 00:47:39.619
of guests that we need in order to have a
1206
00:47:39.639 --> 00:47:41.219
successful Thanksgiving special, Scott.
1207
00:47:41.239 --> 00:47:42.559
Okay, but now you're going to course correct.
1208
00:47:42.579 --> 00:47:44.340
Now I'm going to course correct. I'm not going to
1209
00:47:44.360 --> 00:47:47.110
get Jason Mantzoukas just yet. Okay, all right. But I
1210
00:47:47.280 --> 00:47:50.489
am going to bring one of your all-time faves, Scott.
1211
00:47:50.510 --> 00:47:51.030
Oh, boy.
1212
00:47:51.210 --> 00:47:53.750
Here we go. I'm gearing up to run it to
1213
00:47:53.769 --> 00:48:01.059
the speed port. Here we go. Ah, shit.
1214
00:48:01.219 --> 00:48:03.599
Okay, I hit my toe when I was covered in.
1215
00:48:04.119 --> 00:48:04.619
Woo!
1216
00:48:04.900 --> 00:48:06.519
That thing's huge and red.
1217
00:48:06.599 --> 00:48:06.860
It is.
1218
00:48:06.880 --> 00:48:08.940
It's like comical. It is throbbing like one of them
1219
00:48:09.000 --> 00:48:10.099
Tom and Jerry cartoons.
1220
00:48:10.320 --> 00:48:10.480
Yeah.
1221
00:48:10.699 --> 00:48:12.760
But it's going to be all worth it because, Scott,
1222
00:48:13.760 --> 00:48:18.530
I brought one of your best friends, Buck Tango, Scott.
1223
00:48:18.909 --> 00:48:19.190
Who?
1224
00:48:20.710 --> 00:48:24.909
Hey, hello, it's me, Buck Tango. Buck Tango.
1225
00:48:25.289 --> 00:48:25.389
Who?
1226
00:48:25.429 --> 00:48:29.840
This is, you know... I hate to say this this way. Rudy,
1227
00:48:29.880 --> 00:48:33.219
you fucked up. What do you mean, Buck? I mean,
1228
00:48:33.489 --> 00:48:35.010
I'm happy to be here. I'm happy to see you.
1229
00:48:35.050 --> 00:48:37.610
We know each other, but I met Scott one time.
1230
00:48:37.750 --> 00:48:38.130
Oh, wait.
1231
00:48:38.170 --> 00:48:38.449
No, no.
1232
00:48:38.550 --> 00:48:43.090
I thought you guys were great friends. I repeat for
1233
00:48:43.110 --> 00:48:43.789
a third time. Who?
1234
00:48:45.070 --> 00:48:48.190
You might remember me as, well, last time I saw you,
1235
00:48:48.269 --> 00:48:49.429
you were coming from my mech.
1236
00:48:49.610 --> 00:48:51.329
I built a mech, and that was like my whole thing.
1237
00:48:51.349 --> 00:48:52.550
Coming from his mech.
1238
00:48:52.610 --> 00:48:53.949
I'm going to switch my question to what?
1239
00:48:54.030 --> 00:48:54.670
What?
1240
00:48:55.210 --> 00:48:57.719
So that this is this there lies the problem we
1241
00:48:57.739 --> 00:49:00.219
were having a real back-and-forth a tete-a-tete if you will
1242
00:49:01.300 --> 00:49:04.599
with the sparks with the sparks brothers and Edgar Wright
1243
00:49:04.860 --> 00:49:07.940
and Jack Jack first was also there.
1244
00:49:08.280 --> 00:49:11.119
Oh, yeah the night. Well, he takes pictures of he
1245
00:49:11.139 --> 00:49:11.719
takes pictures of.
1246
00:49:11.699 --> 00:49:14.050
The night wolf And I came in with a I
1247
00:49:14.090 --> 00:49:15.849
came in hot with an announcement I thought I was
1248
00:49:15.849 --> 00:49:17.909
going to blow the roof off of everyone.
1249
00:49:17.969 --> 00:49:21.239
You told him about your crazy announcement? He was not interested?
1250
00:49:21.880 --> 00:49:24.480
If you could believe it, nobody in the room knew
1251
00:49:24.500 --> 00:49:25.659
what I was talking about.
1252
00:49:25.760 --> 00:49:27.159
Nobody understood what a mech was. You have to drop
1253
00:49:27.179 --> 00:49:28.519
it on his ass. A bunch of older white guys
1254
00:49:28.559 --> 00:49:29.159
didn't know what.
1255
00:49:29.219 --> 00:49:30.440
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
1256
00:49:30.619 --> 00:49:33.360
I didn't realize that trying to explain what a mech
1257
00:49:33.400 --> 00:49:36.380
was to two 70-year-olds was going to be an issue.
1258
00:49:36.420 --> 00:49:43.909
And the sparks. Yeah. Okay, Francesca. Now, Scott, this is
1259
00:49:43.949 --> 00:49:46.769
my friend. He's building a mix, Scott.
1260
00:49:46.789 --> 00:49:47.849
You guys know each other?
1261
00:49:47.869 --> 00:49:48.670
Yeah, we're homies.
1262
00:49:48.730 --> 00:49:50.130
We're homies. We're homies.
1263
00:49:50.150 --> 00:49:53.150
That's not that established. Buck Tango, Rudy North, our adventures
1264
00:49:53.250 --> 00:49:55.769
are storied. Okay.
1265
00:49:56.070 --> 00:49:59.429
Everyone's always talking about the classic times that Rudy and
1266
00:49:59.469 --> 00:50:00.010
Buck had.
1267
00:50:00.110 --> 00:50:04.039
Okay. I mean, I kind of remember you. What is it?
1268
00:50:04.059 --> 00:50:07.519
You're building an exoskeleton because people.
1269
00:50:07.619 --> 00:50:11.840
Yeah, a mechanized exoskeleton because of my slight frame.
1270
00:50:11.960 --> 00:50:16.349
I am twee. I'm a bit of a... I'm bitch made. Oh, God.
1271
00:50:16.590 --> 00:50:19.530
Yeah, I'm really, really small. But what do you think, Francesca?
1272
00:50:19.570 --> 00:50:20.489
I mean, he looks huge.
1273
00:50:20.590 --> 00:50:21.400
I'm 5'6.
1274
00:50:21.650 --> 00:50:22.570
Massive person.
1275
00:50:22.610 --> 00:50:22.969
He's like.
1276
00:50:23.550 --> 00:50:25.980
Yeah, compared to Francesca, you're just a normal-sized girl.
1277
00:50:26.010 --> 00:50:27.389
You would tear your ass up, Francesca.
1278
00:50:28.550 --> 00:50:32.289
Scott, hold up, man. You're fucking sick. We can't get
1279
00:50:32.329 --> 00:50:35.789
casted up in here. Can't speak of that. Well, Buck,
1280
00:50:36.150 --> 00:50:37.829
I did fuck up because I brought you here because
1281
00:50:37.869 --> 00:50:39.969
I thought you guys were friends. I'm like bringing Buck Tango.
1282
00:50:39.989 --> 00:50:40.650
I met the dude once.
1283
00:50:40.769 --> 00:50:42.469
I barely even remember anything we talked about.
1284
00:50:42.590 --> 00:50:46.550
If I remember correctly, you said that you told me,
1285
00:50:46.570 --> 00:50:49.010
see you in 2036. I'll see you in 15 years.
1286
00:50:50.429 --> 00:50:51.590
Oh, right.
1287
00:50:51.639 --> 00:50:52.380
Well, it's kind of 2036.
1288
00:50:52.360 --> 00:50:55.739
Kind of 2036 in the Speed Force. Well, that's the thing.
1289
00:50:55.760 --> 00:50:56.059
If I could.
1290
00:50:57.760 --> 00:50:58.739
Yeah, what's the update?
1291
00:50:58.780 --> 00:51:02.000
I brought something to Thanksgiving, and I'd like to announce
1292
00:51:02.019 --> 00:51:02.539
that I brought it.
1293
00:51:02.579 --> 00:51:03.800
Okay, now we're talking.
1294
00:51:03.820 --> 00:51:04.159
Oh, wow.
1295
00:51:04.300 --> 00:51:06.400
Scott, this is going to get your shit going. All right, well, yeah.
1296
00:51:06.480 --> 00:51:08.360
I mean, I haven't had a great time here today.
1297
00:51:08.460 --> 00:51:10.400
No, you're having a good time so far. This is
1298
00:51:10.460 --> 00:51:11.139
kind of a disappointment.
1299
00:51:11.179 --> 00:51:13.179
You had the best time of your fucking life so far.
1300
00:51:13.260 --> 00:51:16.300
I brought rare candy. You look so much less old
1301
00:51:16.320 --> 00:51:18.300
than you did when we started. Yeah, the rare candy
1302
00:51:18.320 --> 00:51:18.860
was a good part.
1303
00:51:18.880 --> 00:51:20.679
You look so old today, Scott. I don't know what
1304
00:51:20.719 --> 00:51:21.440
was going on.
1305
00:51:21.639 --> 00:51:27.190
Have you been to any weird beaches lately, Scott? Okay,
1306
00:51:27.250 --> 00:51:29.130
what's this thing? Just one that Bette Midler was at.
1307
00:51:31.989 --> 00:51:33.750
That is one weird beach.
1308
00:51:33.769 --> 00:51:36.489
That's so weird. Anyway, what do you got? Well, I'll
1309
00:51:36.530 --> 00:51:38.210
just get right to it. I, you know, in the
1310
00:51:38.230 --> 00:51:42.079
Speed Force. I've completed my mech. I went back to
1311
00:51:42.099 --> 00:51:43.440
the drawing board and I completed it.
1312
00:51:43.440 --> 00:51:45.559
What the fuck is a mech?
1313
00:51:46.300 --> 00:51:47.900
You guys don't know what a mech is?
1314
00:51:48.559 --> 00:51:48.699
Oh.
1315
00:51:48.940 --> 00:51:50.179
Okay, Dash knows what a mech is. I knew it
1316
00:51:50.199 --> 00:51:51.280
would excite Dash. Jesus.
1317
00:51:51.559 --> 00:51:52.719
Mechs are so cool!
1318
00:51:52.800 --> 00:51:55.889
This is what I needed. I needed the spirit of
1319
00:51:55.929 --> 00:52:00.210
the youth to hear my announcement. We had some problems
1320
00:52:00.230 --> 00:52:02.550
with the last one. It made me look smaller than
1321
00:52:02.590 --> 00:52:03.170
I actually was.
1322
00:52:03.190 --> 00:52:04.550
Oh yeah, you had to crouch to get in there.
1323
00:52:04.650 --> 00:52:06.829
And it looked like I was sitting on a toilet.
1324
00:52:07.090 --> 00:52:07.909
It was not very flattering.
1325
00:52:07.929 --> 00:52:11.110
It basically was like a toilet... with like a suit of.
1326
00:52:11.170 --> 00:52:14.670
Armor yeah but it accentuated my my if i can
1327
00:52:14.690 --> 00:52:16.250
be frank for one second we're all friends here my
1328
00:52:16.389 --> 00:52:18.989
sweet juicy can it made my ass look gigantic you're
1329
00:52:19.030 --> 00:52:21.010
one of uh several people that i've had on the
1330
00:52:21.030 --> 00:52:25.159
show recently who have giant asses look they're they're they're
1331
00:52:25.199 --> 00:52:26.780
all the rage if you don't got one you gotta
1332
00:52:26.820 --> 00:52:29.039
get one Meanwhile.
1333
00:52:29.079 --> 00:52:30.880
Like a week ago, we had someone with the flattest
1334
00:52:31.019 --> 00:52:31.840
ass I've ever seen.
1335
00:52:32.039 --> 00:52:33.519
Whom?
1336
00:52:33.599 --> 00:52:36.059
This guy, Maurice, who was on like about a week
1337
00:52:36.099 --> 00:52:37.320
ago or so.
1338
00:52:37.340 --> 00:52:38.179
Anyway, yeah. You know what?
1339
00:52:38.739 --> 00:52:41.500
Good luck, Maurice, out there. Well, Maurice isn't here. Buck
1340
00:52:41.559 --> 00:52:42.719
Tango is here.
1341
00:52:42.760 --> 00:52:43.699
That's right.
1342
00:52:43.719 --> 00:52:43.800
Yeah.
1343
00:52:43.820 --> 00:52:45.380
Well, to be honest, I didn't like Maurice either.
1344
00:52:45.400 --> 00:52:47.110
Okay, cool, cool, cool.
1345
00:52:47.619 --> 00:52:50.070
If I can just unpack that for a second, which
1346
00:52:50.110 --> 00:52:51.250
guests do you like?
1347
00:52:51.349 --> 00:52:52.070
Yes, Scott.
1348
00:52:52.230 --> 00:52:53.110
I mean, the ones.
1349
00:52:53.849 --> 00:52:55.670
Look, even the ones who have been on several times,
1350
00:52:55.730 --> 00:52:56.630
I don't even like them.
1351
00:52:56.670 --> 00:52:58.190
Sure, sure, sure.
1352
00:52:58.210 --> 00:52:59.409
Kayla Dickey.
1353
00:53:00.510 --> 00:53:02.570
Kayla Dickey's okay.
1354
00:53:02.840 --> 00:53:03.519
Maybe, I don't know.
1355
00:53:03.579 --> 00:53:10.170
Let me think of some more. Now, Buck. You brought,
1356
00:53:10.429 --> 00:53:12.550
do you want to do a demonstration? Do you want
1357
00:53:12.570 --> 00:53:14.590
to show us what this mech can do? Well, I
1358
00:53:14.630 --> 00:53:15.519
showed up in it.
1359
00:53:15.800 --> 00:53:16.199
I'm in it.
1360
00:53:16.389 --> 00:53:18.179
Oh, you're in it right now. You are?
1361
00:53:18.199 --> 00:53:20.179
Okay, so this is a, you can't. You're wearing a
1362
00:53:20.199 --> 00:53:21.179
three-piece suit, right?
1363
00:53:21.199 --> 00:53:22.880
Yeah. Well, yeah, it's underneath.
1364
00:53:23.760 --> 00:53:24.039
Oh, okay.
1365
00:53:24.059 --> 00:53:26.380
So you got a tailored suit over your mech?
1366
00:53:26.480 --> 00:53:29.079
Exactly. I didn't want to. Oh, by the way, real quick.
1367
00:53:29.099 --> 00:53:30.780
Can I tell you guys about my sexy Halloween costume?
1368
00:53:30.800 --> 00:53:31.300
Oh, yeah.
1369
00:53:31.360 --> 00:53:31.900
Yeah.
1370
00:53:32.960 --> 00:53:36.159
I was a bicycle and Francesca was Jane DeVito.
1371
00:53:36.280 --> 00:53:38.340
Okay, I was Optimus Prime.
1372
00:53:38.389 --> 00:53:41.250
I was really in the mech zone, so I had
1373
00:53:41.289 --> 00:53:44.389
robots on the brain. And so when I transformed, though,
1374
00:53:44.409 --> 00:53:48.190
I'm not a car. I'm just a huge rod, just
1375
00:53:48.210 --> 00:53:49.409
a huge piece.
1376
00:53:49.469 --> 00:53:52.130
So you're Optimus Prime that transforms into a dick.
1377
00:53:52.210 --> 00:53:54.789
Yeah, that's right. A dildo or like a fleshy dick?
1378
00:53:55.730 --> 00:53:57.510
This is a good question, Scott.
1379
00:53:57.530 --> 00:54:01.619
Thank you for asking. No, great question. It did, I, yeah,
1380
00:54:01.699 --> 00:54:04.639
I grow flesh. I'll throw on the outside. It flips
1381
00:54:04.760 --> 00:54:07.280
inward and then it becomes, yeah.
1382
00:54:07.320 --> 00:54:10.519
So flesh on the inside. So every piece just flips. Yeah,
1383
00:54:10.539 --> 00:54:12.010
so you can imagine what it feels like when I'm
1384
00:54:12.030 --> 00:54:14.219
wearing it. Yeah, I'd rather not.
1385
00:54:14.250 --> 00:54:16.170
That just sounds like my husband, Keith.
1386
00:54:17.210 --> 00:54:19.130
Oh, I think it's so big.
1387
00:54:19.150 --> 00:54:19.989
It's waving.
1388
00:54:20.030 --> 00:54:22.130
Francesca, if you keep rolling your eyes that hard, you
1389
00:54:22.170 --> 00:54:23.230
are going to break them.
1390
00:54:23.449 --> 00:54:23.570
Okay?
1391
00:54:23.590 --> 00:54:23.780
Okay.
1392
00:54:24.719 --> 00:54:27.260
So, yeah, do you want to do a demo of this?
1393
00:54:27.980 --> 00:54:30.219
I mean, there's not a whole lot to it. It's just,
1394
00:54:30.539 --> 00:54:33.300
it's an exoskeleton, so it acts as part of your body,
1395
00:54:33.360 --> 00:54:36.230
but mechanical. So I, you know. So do you want
1396
00:54:36.250 --> 00:54:37.630
to take off your suit and show us what it
1397
00:54:37.670 --> 00:54:39.809
looks like? Yeah, I'll just, you know, it's a sort
1398
00:54:39.829 --> 00:54:41.340
of tearaway suit. I'll just tear it off.
1399
00:54:41.369 --> 00:54:42.550
Oh, okay, yeah. There we go.
1400
00:54:42.570 --> 00:54:43.429
Billy Flynn style.
1401
00:54:43.530 --> 00:54:46.309
Yeah, yeah, I don't have time. Oh, you know, can
1402
00:54:46.369 --> 00:54:50.170
I ask, it's clear and plastic. Yeah, yeah.
1403
00:54:50.210 --> 00:54:51.530
And you're not wearing anything underneath.
1404
00:54:51.550 --> 00:54:51.610
No.
1405
00:54:52.800 --> 00:54:55.260
It doesn't count as clothes.
1406
00:54:55.300 --> 00:54:57.760
You can't wear clothes underneath a mech, Scott.
1407
00:54:57.820 --> 00:55:00.119
How is it supposed to interface to your neural system
1408
00:55:00.159 --> 00:55:01.300
if you wear clothes?
1409
00:55:01.780 --> 00:55:05.239
You look so old. Dash, thank you. Well, at least
1410
00:55:05.380 --> 00:55:08.429
paint it. I also got to say, it looks like
1411
00:55:08.469 --> 00:55:10.829
the way it's connected to your neural system is through
1412
00:55:10.889 --> 00:55:13.409
you squatting and those wires coming out of your butthole.
1413
00:55:13.449 --> 00:55:15.269
Yeah, it just looks like you're squatting again.
1414
00:55:15.289 --> 00:55:15.829
Okay, interesting.
1415
00:55:15.889 --> 00:55:18.650
Where would you plug in a mech? I just don't know.
1416
00:55:19.630 --> 00:55:20.969
I guess you only have so many holes.
1417
00:55:21.199 --> 00:55:21.880
Yeah, I got.
1418
00:55:22.519 --> 00:55:23.619
Maybe the ears?
1419
00:55:24.360 --> 00:55:26.599
Does your butthole power the whole thing?
1420
00:55:26.719 --> 00:55:28.900
Well, it doesn't power the whole thing. It goes into the.
1421
00:55:28.940 --> 00:55:32.559
That's the only way I can get to the nervous system.
1422
00:55:32.619 --> 00:55:34.300
I guess in The Matrix, they drill the hole in
1423
00:55:34.320 --> 00:55:36.030
the back of the head and they attach that thing,
1424
00:55:36.070 --> 00:55:36.610
you know, but.
1425
00:55:37.090 --> 00:55:38.230
I misremembered that.
1426
00:55:38.389 --> 00:55:39.210
God damn it.
1427
00:55:39.230 --> 00:55:40.530
You just thought they used it in the butthole?
1428
00:55:41.610 --> 00:55:44.349
I forgot. I remember when Keanu was in the goo.
1429
00:55:44.389 --> 00:55:44.949
He was naked.
1430
00:55:44.989 --> 00:55:47.989
Yeah, he's nude in the goo and he's very frail
1431
00:55:48.030 --> 00:55:49.010
in this part of the movie.
1432
00:55:49.050 --> 00:55:50.769
By the way, I think that goo came from him.
1433
00:55:50.789 --> 00:55:52.449
You think the goo.
1434
00:55:52.250 --> 00:55:52.750
Came from him?
1435
00:55:52.789 --> 00:55:53.440
Yeah, I think he was.
1436
00:55:53.449 --> 00:55:56.090
Like he brought his own goo from home?
1437
00:55:56.170 --> 00:55:56.949
Where'd he get it?
1438
00:55:57.969 --> 00:56:02.219
Well, we can't say to you, but he just.
1439
00:56:02.880 --> 00:56:04.239
Maybe it's the champagne talking.
1440
00:56:04.280 --> 00:56:06.239
I'd rather put it up my butt than have someone
1441
00:56:06.280 --> 00:56:07.820
drill a hole in the back of my neck.
1442
00:56:08.019 --> 00:56:10.500
I don't have a butthole, so I don't know why.
1443
00:56:10.539 --> 00:56:12.019
What? This is Francesca.
1444
00:56:12.039 --> 00:56:12.219
What?
1445
00:56:12.280 --> 00:56:13.500
Francesca.
1446
00:56:14.010 --> 00:56:15.750
I know women have no butthole.
1447
00:56:16.010 --> 00:56:16.969
Oh, okay.
1448
00:56:16.989 --> 00:56:17.590
Do you know that?
1449
00:56:17.610 --> 00:56:18.750
Women have no butthole?
1450
00:56:18.789 --> 00:56:19.789
I had heard that before.
1451
00:56:19.829 --> 00:56:21.170
Women have no butthole. That makes sense.
1452
00:56:21.190 --> 00:56:21.730
That tracks for me.
1453
00:56:21.750 --> 00:56:23.469
I am the only woman here. I am the only woman.
1454
00:56:23.389 --> 00:56:23.849
Who knows that.
1455
00:56:23.869 --> 00:56:24.389
That's true.
1456
00:56:24.550 --> 00:56:24.829
You know what?
1457
00:56:24.849 --> 00:56:25.989
We have more women on the show. We got to
1458
00:56:26.010 --> 00:56:28.250
believe women. We got to believe women. I did try
1459
00:56:28.269 --> 00:56:30.909
to grab some other women. Very difficult.
1460
00:56:30.969 --> 00:56:33.019
Maybe try to not grab them.
1461
00:56:33.079 --> 00:56:38.159
You know what? Let's not isolate what I just said. Now, Dash,
1462
00:56:39.059 --> 00:56:41.639
thank you for finishing the mech before... You're welcome. Back
1463
00:56:41.679 --> 00:56:44.880
to Dash. You're done with Buck. Buck, thank you for
1464
00:56:44.920 --> 00:56:48.000
finishing the mech before Speed Force Thanksgiving.
1465
00:56:48.039 --> 00:56:50.159
Very similar names, by the way. Almost as if yours
1466
00:56:50.199 --> 00:56:54.719
was inspired by his. I wouldn't say that. Names are similar.
1467
00:56:55.239 --> 00:56:56.530
yeah some names are similar i.
1468
00:56:56.510 --> 00:56:58.690
Don't think they share a single letter.
1469
00:56:58.489 --> 00:57:01.550
No no but like the the way the syllables and
1470
00:57:01.570 --> 00:57:04.130
the way you say them dash grab them buck tango
1471
00:57:04.170 --> 00:57:05.789
okay yeah.
1472
00:57:05.510 --> 00:57:09.130
Uh sean distant also is in there i gotta meet
1473
00:57:09.150 --> 00:57:11.769
that guy yeah interesting guy one of my favorite actors.
1474
00:57:11.550 --> 00:57:15.150
You're talking first syllable one syllable name two syllables second
1475
00:57:15.210 --> 00:57:16.329
i'm you're.
1476
00:57:16.210 --> 00:57:20.510
Hammered go to bed you know what You can curl up.
1477
00:57:20.510 --> 00:57:20.849
You know what?
1478
00:57:21.269 --> 00:57:23.309
Maybe have a little more rare candy. That'll set you straight.
1479
00:57:23.329 --> 00:57:24.010
Yeah, leaving you out.
1480
00:57:24.300 --> 00:57:25.239
So mind if I snooze?
1481
00:57:27.599 --> 00:57:29.920
Okay, now, Buck, thank you for finishing the beck, but
1482
00:57:30.199 --> 00:57:32.639
did you bring the pumpkin pies and stuff that I
1483
00:57:32.699 --> 00:57:33.199
asked you to make?
1484
00:57:33.219 --> 00:57:35.489
Yeah, I'm so hungry right now. I don't know what
1485
00:57:35.530 --> 00:57:38.389
it is about this candy, but it's like... I'm fucking starving.
1486
00:57:38.989 --> 00:57:43.340
So the mech is supposed to help me in the kitchen,
1487
00:57:43.380 --> 00:57:43.630
sort of.
1488
00:57:43.659 --> 00:57:45.340
I'm not a very good, inept cook.
1489
00:57:45.739 --> 00:57:49.030
So I was going to put the exoskeleton on and
1490
00:57:49.070 --> 00:57:49.730
get to baking.
1491
00:57:50.440 --> 00:57:53.570
But I forgot all my ingredients. Oh, God.
1492
00:57:54.219 --> 00:57:56.530
Did the suit pick other things in the kitchen that
1493
00:57:56.730 --> 00:57:58.150
it thought was ingredients?
1494
00:57:58.210 --> 00:58:01.090
I brought a whisk, one whisk. Okay.
1495
00:58:01.230 --> 00:58:04.469
I brought an air fryer. It's not really helpful for
1496
00:58:04.489 --> 00:58:06.159
when making a pie. You probably could make a pie
1497
00:58:06.179 --> 00:58:06.409
in there.
1498
00:58:06.469 --> 00:58:08.039
I guess we could put some of this candy in there.
1499
00:58:08.059 --> 00:58:09.139
Yeah, maybe put some of that in the whisk.
1500
00:58:09.159 --> 00:58:10.579
I got some stuff if you need stuff.
1501
00:58:11.000 --> 00:58:12.579
What else did you bring from your kitchen today? Oh,
1502
00:58:12.599 --> 00:58:15.139
what else did I bring? I brought the microwave. Oh, wow.
1503
00:58:15.260 --> 00:58:16.980
I brought an empty ice cube tray.
1504
00:58:17.000 --> 00:58:17.320
Interesting.
1505
00:58:17.389 --> 00:58:19.469
I brought the Brita filter. Just the filter only, not
1506
00:58:19.510 --> 00:58:19.969
the Brita.
1507
00:58:20.010 --> 00:58:22.829
Yeah, we don't have any food to put that stuff into.
1508
00:58:22.849 --> 00:58:25.489
And so none of that's edible, huh?
1509
00:58:25.650 --> 00:58:26.989
Yeah, yeah.
1510
00:58:27.010 --> 00:58:28.559
What kind of food would you put in a fucking
1511
00:58:28.619 --> 00:58:32.900
Brita filter, Scott? Soup?
1512
00:58:32.920 --> 00:58:33.860
You got filter soup?
1513
00:58:33.880 --> 00:58:36.760
Francesca, you got to get out of Scott's face. Francesca,
1514
00:58:36.800 --> 00:58:39.730
for the listeners, Francesca jumped up on Scott's knee and
1515
00:58:39.750 --> 00:58:42.309
started getting in his face. By the way, we took
1516
00:58:42.329 --> 00:58:44.909
the candy and we were pretty cool. I'm pretty chilled.
1517
00:58:44.929 --> 00:58:47.150
She's gotten worse. What's up with you, Francesca?
1518
00:58:47.650 --> 00:58:50.929
Now I am on Scott's shoulders giving him a massage.
1519
00:58:51.010 --> 00:58:54.699
God, you look like the angel or devil. Yes, stop
1520
00:58:54.739 --> 00:58:58.300
switching sides. And changing costumes.
1521
00:58:58.360 --> 00:58:59.619
He said I am good.
1522
00:58:59.800 --> 00:59:05.960
He said I am bad. Let's stay on the bad side. Now, Buck,
1523
00:59:06.119 --> 00:59:08.340
I mean, this is a, I got to say, you
1524
00:59:08.380 --> 00:59:10.599
were supposed to bring it home here. I thought that.
1525
00:59:10.639 --> 00:59:13.679
I know, there's not a lot to me. There's a lot,
1526
00:59:13.719 --> 00:59:16.500
there's sort of a, you know. We've exhausted our questions. Yeah,
1527
00:59:16.519 --> 00:59:18.280
there's not a lot for me to.
1528
00:59:18.440 --> 00:59:19.960
You're a guy who makes a mech.
1529
00:59:19.980 --> 00:59:21.239
We're not interested in the mech.
1530
00:59:21.420 --> 00:59:22.039
And that's it.
1531
00:59:22.159 --> 00:59:22.360
Yeah.
1532
00:59:22.639 --> 00:59:24.699
You look like you have wires coming out of your
1533
00:59:24.719 --> 00:59:28.699
butthole and a clear mech costume. And even that's not enough.
1534
00:59:29.179 --> 00:59:32.469
I have a question. Do you think that maybe your
1535
00:59:32.530 --> 00:59:36.989
personality is so lacking that you thought you need the mech?
1536
00:59:37.670 --> 00:59:42.969
Or maybe you're using the mech to cover up your personality?
1537
00:59:43.070 --> 00:59:46.219
You sound like my mom. Exactly.
1538
00:59:46.360 --> 00:59:49.360
I ask the deep questions around here. Nobody else know
1539
00:59:49.380 --> 00:59:50.260
how to hear.
1540
00:59:50.099 --> 00:59:50.920
You and your body.
1541
00:59:50.980 --> 00:59:53.469
I'm saying in a nice, in a, you know, in
1542
00:59:53.510 --> 00:59:56.349
a maternal way, she does say that, hey, maybe your personality,
1543
00:59:56.610 --> 00:59:58.329
you think you gotta, you gotta build this mech so
1544
00:59:58.349 --> 00:59:58.909
people like you.
1545
00:59:59.210 --> 01:00:01.389
You're great on your own. I say, shut up, mom.
1546
01:00:01.590 --> 01:00:02.510
But now I'm hearing it for you.
1547
01:00:03.550 --> 01:00:03.809
It's true.
1548
01:00:03.829 --> 01:00:05.309
I'm starting to change my tune a little bit.
1549
01:00:05.769 --> 01:00:07.929
So maybe you don't need a stupid mech.
1550
01:00:08.070 --> 01:00:09.579
Yeah. Well, I worked really hard on it. How do
1551
01:00:09.599 --> 01:00:11.739
we build a mech for your personality?
1552
01:00:11.980 --> 01:00:14.199
Yes. What do we have to do?
1553
01:00:14.199 --> 01:00:15.900
An emotional mech. Oh.
1554
01:00:15.920 --> 01:00:18.000
I don't mean to be a devil's advocate here, but
1555
01:00:18.039 --> 01:00:20.579
where I'm from, mechs solve a lot of problems.
1556
01:00:20.599 --> 01:00:20.679
Okay.
1557
01:00:20.880 --> 01:00:22.760
That can only be solved by mechs.
1558
01:00:23.539 --> 01:00:24.840
And where are you from exactly?
1559
01:00:24.920 --> 01:00:25.860
I'm in the Kanto region.
1560
01:00:25.880 --> 01:00:27.800
Kanto region, yeah. Maybe you should go live there. I
1561
01:00:28.429 --> 01:00:30.989
wouldn't mind a change of scenery, you know? Yeah.
1562
01:00:31.030 --> 01:00:32.289
I mean, your mom probably couldn't go.
1563
01:00:33.460 --> 01:00:35.920
Oh, hmm.
1564
01:00:35.940 --> 01:00:38.900
This guy loves his mom. I don't really do.
1565
01:00:39.039 --> 01:00:41.019
I think it's cute how much he loves his mom.
1566
01:00:41.119 --> 01:00:43.449
I'm bitch made. I told you. You are bitch made.
1567
01:00:43.489 --> 01:00:47.250
That's what that cursive tattoo on your arm says. It's
1568
01:00:47.449 --> 01:00:51.329
across my knuckles too. On your knuckles. Right, right. Bitch made.
1569
01:00:52.010 --> 01:00:55.000
You know what, Scott? I feel like I've... I've failed
1570
01:00:55.039 --> 01:00:57.219
you so far, Scott. I feel like I've brought some guests,
1571
01:00:57.280 --> 01:00:59.920
and they're great, of course, but they're not the caliber
1572
01:00:59.940 --> 01:01:03.820
of guests for a Thanksgiving special, Scott. Bring this home.
1573
01:01:03.860 --> 01:01:06.710
What is happening here?
1574
01:01:06.750 --> 01:01:07.170
You know what?
1575
01:01:07.230 --> 01:01:09.809
It kind of sucks that you're talking shit about us
1576
01:01:09.849 --> 01:01:13.309
right to our face.
1577
01:01:13.670 --> 01:01:14.969
This is an arrow.
1578
01:01:14.989 --> 01:01:18.329
Mmm.
1579
01:01:19.070 --> 01:01:25.039
And this is the sound of its minty bubbles. Conjuring
1580
01:01:25.139 --> 01:01:26.039
melt in your mouth.
1581
01:01:26.840 --> 01:01:29.050
Pure bubbly joy.
1582
01:01:32.230 --> 01:01:36.190
Melt into the moment with Aero's delicious peppermint bubbles.
1583
01:01:36.210 --> 01:01:39.809
Aero, feel the bubbles melt.
1584
01:01:43.610 --> 01:01:47.530
Following Aldi's big price drop announcement, we've got more good news.
1585
01:01:48.090 --> 01:01:52.150
The kids are going back to school. And we're dropping
1586
01:01:52.409 --> 01:01:56.389
even more prices. On loads of back-to-school favourites, from pressed
1587
01:01:56.469 --> 01:01:59.369
apple juice to Brannan's lasagne. And we're not just dropping
1588
01:01:59.389 --> 01:02:03.849
this week. No, these prices are sticking around. Unlike the
1589
01:02:03.889 --> 01:02:08.969
school holidays. Saving up to 20% on your back-to-school shop.
1590
01:02:09.230 --> 01:02:10.230
It's not complicated.
1591
01:02:10.489 --> 01:02:10.969
At Aldi.
1592
01:02:11.159 --> 01:02:13.519
Visit aldi.ie slash price drop for more information.
1593
01:02:13.920 --> 01:02:19.119
My home is my castle. My sing-in-the-shower place, or work-in-my-undies place.
1594
01:02:19.679 --> 01:02:23.699
My pizza for breakfast. Cornflakes for dinner place. My home
1595
01:02:23.800 --> 01:02:24.800
is my me place.
1596
01:02:25.380 --> 01:02:28.070
With AXA Home Insurance, you can protect the place where
1597
01:02:28.110 --> 01:02:31.949
you can truly be yourself and get 24-hour emergency home
1598
01:02:31.969 --> 01:02:35.030
assistance as standard. Get a quote online or call into
1599
01:02:35.050 --> 01:02:35.889
your local branch.
1600
01:02:36.429 --> 01:02:36.809
AXA.
1601
01:02:38.289 --> 01:02:38.909
Know you can.
1602
01:02:39.289 --> 01:02:42.170
Policy terms and conditions apply. AXA Insurance stack is regulated
1603
01:02:42.190 --> 01:02:43.389
by the Central Bank of Ireland.
1604
01:02:46.269 --> 01:02:49.920
OK, you know what, Scott? I have an idea. I
1605
01:02:49.960 --> 01:02:52.360
don't think I could pull someone from your past, Scott.
1606
01:02:52.840 --> 01:02:52.940
Oh.
1607
01:02:53.280 --> 01:02:56.559
I need to pull someone from an alternate dimension, Scott.
1608
01:02:57.300 --> 01:03:00.139
Oh, an alternate dimension. Okay, like the multiverse?
1609
01:03:00.489 --> 01:03:01.670
Yes, Scott. Another dimension?
1610
01:03:01.789 --> 01:03:04.429
Like a Hawaiian region? No, no.
1611
01:03:04.630 --> 01:03:07.150
Like a dimension where it's only bad and beyond.
1612
01:03:07.170 --> 01:03:09.010
Well, that exists. The beyond part.
1613
01:03:09.050 --> 01:03:11.550
Like it's the things you know, but everything's Hawaiian?
1614
01:03:11.570 --> 01:03:14.900
But no, Scott. There was a guest. Why he only
1615
01:03:14.920 --> 01:03:18.190
talk to Scott? Because it's kind of the only way
1616
01:03:18.230 --> 01:03:22.210
to keep this character going. Don't say my name.
1617
01:03:22.369 --> 01:03:24.809
Even now he responded to Scott.
1618
01:03:25.590 --> 01:03:29.079
Scott asked him the question. Thank you, Francesca, but Scott.
1619
01:03:32.219 --> 01:03:34.239
I think there's someone that you want to see that
1620
01:03:34.960 --> 01:03:36.659
recently was banned from the show.
1621
01:03:36.860 --> 01:03:39.260
Well, if they've been banned from the show, they can't
1622
01:03:39.300 --> 01:03:42.099
be on the show anymore. You know who can be, Scott?
1623
01:03:42.570 --> 01:03:46.800
his counterpart in CBB World 2.
1624
01:03:46.800 --> 01:03:50.159
Oh, the parallel CBB World. That's right, Scott. We know
1625
01:03:50.199 --> 01:03:53.070
that there are infinite- With minor differences. Yes, that's right, Scott.
1626
01:03:53.309 --> 01:03:55.869
We know that there are infinite CBB Worlds, and in
1627
01:03:55.929 --> 01:03:59.670
CBB World 2, it's exactly the same. But this guest
1628
01:03:59.949 --> 01:04:01.389
is not banned from the show.
1629
01:04:01.409 --> 01:04:03.550
That's the only difference in CBB World 2?
1630
01:04:03.550 --> 01:04:07.280
That's right, Scott. Also, yes, and also Barack Obama was
1631
01:04:07.340 --> 01:04:11.639
president for 12 years. Oh, awesome. Pretty great. He FDR'd it.
1632
01:04:11.739 --> 01:04:15.920
He totally FDR'd it. But I'm going to bring him, Scott. Oh!
1633
01:04:18.360 --> 01:04:20.530
Okay, you didn't disappear, you're just taking a shit right now.
1634
01:04:21.010 --> 01:04:21.869
Yeah, yeah, hold up.
1635
01:04:22.309 --> 01:04:23.590
What a mess, oh God.
1636
01:04:23.730 --> 01:04:26.849
Okay, all right, okay. I can't do that. You know what, Scott?
1637
01:04:27.230 --> 01:04:28.869
I feel like the only way to pull him from
1638
01:04:28.909 --> 01:04:32.349
the other dimension is if we all go to sleep.
1639
01:04:32.389 --> 01:04:33.349
You're all asleep.
1640
01:04:33.369 --> 01:04:38.420
We've all fallen asleep here in the Speed Force. You're
1641
01:04:38.480 --> 01:04:39.880
sleeping at his eye, Morpheus.
1642
01:04:40.159 --> 01:04:41.500
Oh my God, Morpheus?
1643
01:04:41.679 --> 01:04:42.679
The Lord of Dreams.
1644
01:04:42.780 --> 01:04:44.739
Morpheus, the Lord of Dreams.
1645
01:04:44.840 --> 01:04:47.679
Morpheus 2.
1646
01:04:47.679 --> 01:04:49.170
Morpheus from CBB World 2.
1647
01:04:49.139 --> 01:04:51.630
Morpheus from CBB World 2, but my name there is
1648
01:04:51.809 --> 01:04:52.530
Morpheus 2.
1649
01:04:52.530 --> 01:04:53.449
Oh, Morpheus.
1650
01:04:53.510 --> 01:04:55.090
There's children when they speak legends.
1651
01:04:55.110 --> 01:04:57.650
Is that T-O-O? Yes. Okay.
1652
01:04:57.769 --> 01:04:58.909
Is there a first one?
1653
01:04:59.570 --> 01:05:04.320
Not here. It's a confusing name. Yeah. It implies that
1654
01:05:04.360 --> 01:05:07.159
there was things before, but those things shall not be
1655
01:05:07.199 --> 01:05:07.699
spoken of.
1656
01:05:07.719 --> 01:05:07.860
Hmm.
1657
01:05:08.610 --> 01:05:10.380
God, Morpheus, it's so good to see you.
1658
01:05:10.429 --> 01:05:10.980
Thank you.
1659
01:05:11.000 --> 01:05:14.000
You got voted off of the show by... So I heard.
1660
01:05:14.179 --> 01:05:14.559
Not me.
1661
01:05:14.579 --> 01:05:16.320
A different Morpheus.
1662
01:05:16.360 --> 01:05:17.519
Right, yeah.
1663
01:05:17.960 --> 01:05:20.869
There are several Dream Lords, one for each aspect of
1664
01:05:20.909 --> 01:05:24.070
the universe. And whenever one of them perishes or is
1665
01:05:24.429 --> 01:05:28.289
voted off in a Survivor-like game show... They have to
1666
01:05:28.389 --> 01:05:31.619
upload their files to Dropbox and then the other Morphe
1667
01:05:31.860 --> 01:05:34.800
eye read the Dropbox files and catch up. So I've
1668
01:05:34.840 --> 01:05:36.960
read all about what happened to original Morpheus. You're fully
1669
01:05:36.980 --> 01:05:39.079
caught up then. Not only that, I went down a
1670
01:05:39.159 --> 01:05:42.159
real rabbit hole of like CBB episodes.
1671
01:05:42.260 --> 01:05:44.519
Oh, that's great. Oh, okay. What do you think? The
1672
01:05:45.159 --> 01:05:48.690
ones before 600 are a little dicey. They're not worth
1673
01:05:48.710 --> 01:05:51.769
going into, I don't think. But I had a good
1674
01:05:51.809 --> 01:05:56.650
old time. Made some corrections on the wiki. You know,
1675
01:05:56.789 --> 01:05:59.500
would it be cool if we just treated you like
1676
01:05:59.719 --> 01:06:01.340
the Morpheus dream lord we knew?
1677
01:06:01.440 --> 01:06:04.099
Not worry about any sort of differences and pretend like
1678
01:06:04.159 --> 01:06:05.199
I was the same person?
1679
01:06:05.219 --> 01:06:05.460
Yeah.
1680
01:06:05.480 --> 01:06:08.860
Fine with me. Okay, that's great. But wait a minute.
1681
01:06:09.119 --> 01:06:10.309
Are we in a dream right now?
1682
01:06:10.329 --> 01:06:12.329
You are in a dream of the Speed Force. I
1683
01:06:12.369 --> 01:06:14.869
can only be seen by people who are asleep. I
1684
01:06:14.969 --> 01:06:16.489
only exist in people's dreams.
1685
01:06:16.570 --> 01:06:17.489
Did you, by the way.
1686
01:06:17.510 --> 01:06:18.809
If you see me, you are dreaming.
1687
01:06:18.849 --> 01:06:19.489
Is that hard?
1688
01:06:19.530 --> 01:06:19.969
Were people.
1689
01:06:20.409 --> 01:06:20.730
What's that?
1690
01:06:20.789 --> 01:06:21.530
Is it hard?
1691
01:06:21.730 --> 01:06:22.050
For me?
1692
01:06:22.070 --> 01:06:22.750
Because what if.
1693
01:06:22.710 --> 01:06:24.550
You want to like have a birthday party, but everyone
1694
01:06:24.570 --> 01:06:24.769
wakes up.
1695
01:06:24.769 --> 01:06:25.010
That's right.
1696
01:06:25.030 --> 01:06:27.489
I can only have people who are sleeping come to
1697
01:06:27.510 --> 01:06:30.300
my birthday party. Thank you, young man. That is very
1698
01:06:30.400 --> 01:06:33.119
empathetic of you to appreciate. Oh, Morpheus, this is Dash.
1699
01:06:33.139 --> 01:06:34.860
Grab him. Dash, this is Morpheus.
1700
01:06:34.920 --> 01:06:37.340
I know Dash well. I know from his dreams. But
1701
01:06:37.380 --> 01:06:38.960
the Dash of CBB World too.
1702
01:06:39.239 --> 01:06:40.059
Yes, it's not you.
1703
01:06:40.079 --> 01:06:41.059
Okay.
1704
01:06:41.219 --> 01:06:41.739
It's Dash.
1705
01:06:44.280 --> 01:06:45.920
I love an unbothered spirit.
1706
01:06:46.980 --> 01:06:49.300
Were people dreaming on October the 31st this year?
1707
01:06:50.159 --> 01:06:50.880
Yes, why do you ask?
1708
01:06:51.159 --> 01:06:53.300
Oh, I was just wondering if you dressed up at all. Oh, yes,
1709
01:06:53.360 --> 01:06:56.099
I'm dressed up right now. Oh, you're still dressed up.
1710
01:06:56.300 --> 01:06:57.199
Yes, yes, yes, yes.
1711
01:06:57.219 --> 01:06:58.659
You don't recognize my costume?
1712
01:06:58.679 --> 01:07:01.380
No, who are you? I can't quite place it. Maybe
1713
01:07:01.400 --> 01:07:03.179
things are different on CBB World 2.
1714
01:07:03.179 --> 01:07:08.159
Yes, it could be different. I am, let's see, sexy,
1715
01:07:09.050 --> 01:07:10.269
sexy Bugs Bunny.
1716
01:07:10.409 --> 01:07:10.730
Okay.
1717
01:07:11.269 --> 01:07:14.670
So sexy Bugs Bunny... But a sexier.
1718
01:07:14.210 --> 01:07:16.690
Version of that? Well, no.
1719
01:07:16.949 --> 01:07:19.030
The two sexies cancel each other out and I'm just
1720
01:07:19.210 --> 01:07:20.170
regular Bugs Bunny.
1721
01:07:20.190 --> 01:07:21.070
You're just regular Bugs Bunny.
1722
01:07:21.090 --> 01:07:23.269
Sexy, sexy Bugs Bunny is just regular Bugs Bunny. You're
1723
01:07:23.289 --> 01:07:25.030
not even wearing the dress that Bugs Bunny wore. Well,
1724
01:07:25.050 --> 01:07:27.070
that doesn't make any sense. Once you put on a
1725
01:07:27.130 --> 01:07:28.909
second dress and they cancel each other out and you're
1726
01:07:28.929 --> 01:07:30.050
just back to regular Bugs Bunny.
1727
01:07:30.070 --> 01:07:30.409
Interesting.
1728
01:07:30.449 --> 01:07:31.690
That's why I have the ears.
1729
01:07:31.730 --> 01:07:33.070
You see the ears? Yeah.
1730
01:07:33.489 --> 01:07:33.809
Okay.
1731
01:07:33.829 --> 01:07:34.880
That's why you have the ears.
1732
01:07:35.429 --> 01:07:36.280
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
1733
01:07:36.300 --> 01:07:38.659
I thought that was just Morpheus' thing that he had
1734
01:07:38.860 --> 01:07:39.840
bunny ears or something.
1735
01:07:39.920 --> 01:07:42.840
Well, also you're wearing your cloak and it's, you know. Oh, yes,
1736
01:07:42.969 --> 01:07:44.050
let me move my hood back.
1737
01:07:44.070 --> 01:07:44.389
There we go.
1738
01:07:44.389 --> 01:07:46.050
Yes, I didn't even think.
1739
01:07:46.090 --> 01:07:48.809
There you are, yeah. Morpheus, this is Francesca Bolognese.
1740
01:07:49.070 --> 01:07:49.670
Oh, greetings.
1741
01:07:49.769 --> 01:07:51.599
Hey, nice to meet you.
1742
01:07:52.280 --> 01:07:54.360
You are asleep, young lady. I hope that doesn't bother you.
1743
01:07:54.719 --> 01:07:59.280
That fucking creepy thing. You Cosby'd her. Have we talked
1744
01:07:59.320 --> 01:08:02.949
about this? I wouldn't appreciate that, Fer. I don't think
1745
01:08:02.969 --> 01:08:05.630
that's right. What's the Bill Cosby of CBB World 2 doing?
1746
01:08:05.650 --> 01:08:06.269
It's worse.
1747
01:08:06.789 --> 01:08:07.469
Oh, shit.
1748
01:08:07.510 --> 01:08:08.289
You don't want to know.
1749
01:08:08.429 --> 01:08:09.449
Shit.
1750
01:08:09.510 --> 01:08:11.239
He did all the things he did here, and his
1751
01:08:11.300 --> 01:08:12.280
old albums are bad.
1752
01:08:12.500 --> 01:08:12.780
Oh, no.
1753
01:08:12.820 --> 01:08:14.119
This is nothing.
1754
01:08:16.399 --> 01:08:17.000
That sucks.
1755
01:08:17.279 --> 01:08:18.760
You know what I mean? It's like not, it's not
1756
01:08:18.800 --> 01:08:20.600
even the art and the art situation.
1757
01:08:20.619 --> 01:08:21.119
That shit sucks.
1758
01:08:21.140 --> 01:08:24.180
It's actually better for- That actually makes it easier, yeah.
1759
01:08:24.979 --> 01:08:26.180
Wasn't that hard to cancel the guy.
1760
01:08:26.739 --> 01:08:29.810
But that's why, Francesca, you'll see here you are 10
1761
01:08:29.810 --> 01:08:32.489
feet tall because you are the person of your dreams.
1762
01:08:32.649 --> 01:08:36.069
Well, but I actually am realizing I don't want to
1763
01:08:36.090 --> 01:08:36.729
be this tall.
1764
01:08:36.810 --> 01:08:37.869
I like being small.
1765
01:08:37.890 --> 01:08:38.520
This is a nightmare for you.
1766
01:08:38.529 --> 01:08:40.890
You seem like sort of a contrarian spirit is what
1767
01:08:40.909 --> 01:08:41.869
I'm picking up on.
1768
01:08:41.890 --> 01:08:42.189
Yeah.
1769
01:08:42.510 --> 01:08:43.989
I sort of feel like I gave you your heart's
1770
01:08:44.029 --> 01:08:45.850
desire and you're kind of bummed about it.
1771
01:08:45.859 --> 01:08:48.479
It's kind of stupid to me because part of the
1772
01:08:48.539 --> 01:08:51.979
reason actually that me and my husband, Keith, are soul.
1773
01:08:52.420 --> 01:08:53.729
Do you not like him?
1774
01:08:54.270 --> 01:08:55.170
I love him.
1775
01:08:55.510 --> 01:08:57.510
I only know of him from your dreams of him.
1776
01:08:57.710 --> 01:08:59.350
He is the love of my life.
1777
01:08:59.430 --> 01:09:00.439
I love him. so much.
1778
01:09:00.699 --> 01:09:03.159
But the way that we have sex, he's like going
1779
01:09:03.239 --> 01:09:06.520
through his pocket. And then I do all the stuff
1780
01:09:06.539 --> 01:09:08.399
to his dick. His dick is so big.
1781
01:09:09.859 --> 01:09:10.779
What is it, like two inches?
1782
01:09:11.159 --> 01:09:14.050
He's a two, no, one and a three quarter.
1783
01:09:14.109 --> 01:09:14.949
Oh my God, huge.
1784
01:09:14.970 --> 01:09:16.810
He's a massive, bigger than yours.
1785
01:09:16.829 --> 01:09:19.550
Yeah, for sure.
1786
01:09:20.500 --> 01:09:22.939
Anyway, so yes, for me now, I'm kind of rethinking,
1787
01:09:22.979 --> 01:09:24.319
how do I have sex with my husband?
1788
01:09:24.340 --> 01:09:26.270
Well, this is only in your dreams. When you wake up,
1789
01:09:26.279 --> 01:09:27.960
you'll be back in your regular body.
1790
01:09:28.060 --> 01:09:28.720
Oh, thank God.
1791
01:09:28.840 --> 01:09:29.220
Okay.
1792
01:09:29.300 --> 01:09:30.979
Hey, is it okay if I ask a couple questions
1793
01:09:31.020 --> 01:09:34.439
about pop culture? Because I only know TV and movies
1794
01:09:34.460 --> 01:09:35.560
when people dream about them.
1795
01:09:35.579 --> 01:09:35.800
Right.
1796
01:09:35.819 --> 01:09:36.899
And it's confusing.
1797
01:09:37.220 --> 01:09:38.220
Oh, okay.
1798
01:09:38.260 --> 01:09:40.229
Sometimes when I dream about a movie, I dream about
1799
01:09:40.239 --> 01:09:41.689
it the way I want it to be, not the
1800
01:09:41.710 --> 01:09:42.390
way it actually is.
1801
01:09:42.409 --> 01:09:44.609
Those are the only movies that I can watch.
1802
01:09:44.970 --> 01:09:45.270
Right.
1803
01:09:45.369 --> 01:09:45.550
Yeah.
1804
01:09:45.609 --> 01:09:46.270
Ask us anything.
1805
01:09:46.529 --> 01:09:48.949
There's a television show and it's got something to do
1806
01:09:49.010 --> 01:09:52.770
with poor people in Korea competing in a murderous game
1807
01:09:52.869 --> 01:09:53.520
for money.
1808
01:09:54.069 --> 01:09:54.760
Yeah.
1809
01:09:54.779 --> 01:09:55.319
Parasite.
1810
01:09:56.079 --> 01:09:56.739
Maybe, perhaps.
1811
01:09:56.760 --> 01:09:56.899
Yes.
1812
01:09:56.939 --> 01:09:59.720
It sounds like a class. It's a lot of commentary
1813
01:09:59.760 --> 01:10:00.579
on class people.
1814
01:10:01.279 --> 01:10:01.859
Squid Game.
1815
01:10:02.359 --> 01:10:04.899
Oh, that sounds right. It could be that, but everybody
1816
01:10:04.979 --> 01:10:07.359
is a grandmother and they're naked the whole time.
1817
01:10:07.869 --> 01:10:09.970
Oh, I mean, you're thinking of Squid Game, but I
1818
01:10:10.010 --> 01:10:12.710
think someone's mixing up their own grandmother.
1819
01:10:12.729 --> 01:10:13.449
That's the Squid Game.
1820
01:10:13.329 --> 01:10:17.210
That I've seen. It's naked grandmas. I can't stop watching it.
1821
01:10:18.010 --> 01:10:19.909
You know, I keep thinking it's moving too slow, but
1822
01:10:19.930 --> 01:10:21.000
I binge right through it.
1823
01:10:21.100 --> 01:10:23.180
The Squid Game I saw is when a tentacle and
1824
01:10:23.239 --> 01:10:27.500
a tentacle play water polo together.
1825
01:10:27.520 --> 01:10:27.760
Okay.
1826
01:10:27.800 --> 01:10:28.920
Yes, I've seen that episode.
1827
01:10:28.939 --> 01:10:32.630
So you've dreamed about that. But it's pinpoint accuracy.
1828
01:10:32.649 --> 01:10:34.409
No, that's not a dream. That's a real squid game
1829
01:10:34.449 --> 01:10:34.949
that I watched.
1830
01:10:35.109 --> 01:10:37.090
Right, yeah, but you've dreamed about it if he's seen it.
1831
01:10:37.390 --> 01:10:39.310
Oh, yes, I guess so. I mean, it was quite
1832
01:10:39.329 --> 01:10:40.329
a match. Sorry.
1833
01:10:40.350 --> 01:10:44.359
No, not at all. Sorry. You know what, Dash has had...
1834
01:10:44.180 --> 01:10:46.619
After they'd say anything, she'd say, sorry. Yeah, Dash has
1835
01:10:46.659 --> 01:10:48.479
had a little to drink tonight. I had a haul
1836
01:10:48.520 --> 01:10:51.520
of the champagne. All of it.
1837
01:10:51.560 --> 01:10:53.920
Good for you. Good for you. A man without vice
1838
01:10:53.939 --> 01:10:56.140
is a man without virtue. Now, Morpheus.
1839
01:10:56.840 --> 01:10:57.380
Sorry.
1840
01:10:58.979 --> 01:11:00.880
You live in the dream dimension, of course.
1841
01:11:01.020 --> 01:11:03.789
Correct. What is it? I administer the dream dimension.
1842
01:11:03.810 --> 01:11:06.569
You administer the dream dimension. It is my responsibility. That
1843
01:11:06.609 --> 01:11:09.850
is so creepy. That's so creepy. It's like a live-work situation.
1844
01:11:10.069 --> 01:11:10.630
That's correct.
1845
01:11:10.850 --> 01:11:13.729
What is your relationship with the holiday of Skanksgiving?
1846
01:11:14.500 --> 01:11:17.560
It's deep and intimate. You celebrate it. It's my favorite holiday.
1847
01:11:18.020 --> 01:11:19.550
Skanksgiving is my favorite holiday.
1848
01:11:19.590 --> 01:11:20.279
Interesting.
1849
01:11:20.390 --> 01:11:21.010
Yes, that's right.
1850
01:11:21.310 --> 01:11:24.510
Do people have very vivid dreams on Skanksgiving? Skanksgiving is
1851
01:11:24.529 --> 01:11:27.029
when we are closest to the dream world. Whoa.
1852
01:11:27.109 --> 01:11:30.229
Dressing in sexy costumes for a month brings us ever
1853
01:11:30.270 --> 01:11:33.510
so close to our primal thoughts and desires. Skanksgiving is
1854
01:11:33.550 --> 01:11:37.029
a sacred time in the dreamscape. And the tryptophan from
1855
01:11:37.069 --> 01:11:38.430
the turkey probably helps too, huh?
1856
01:11:38.449 --> 01:11:38.770
Oh, yeah.
1857
01:11:38.810 --> 01:11:39.550
Everyone's asleep.
1858
01:11:39.609 --> 01:11:40.289
You know it, pal.
1859
01:11:40.310 --> 01:11:42.890
But what are the traditions of us saying Skanksgiving?
1860
01:11:43.409 --> 01:11:47.029
Skanksgiving. Is that hard for a... Tiny Italian?
1861
01:11:47.050 --> 01:11:50.460
You're temporarily big, so it'd be easy for you now.
1862
01:11:50.479 --> 01:11:51.500
Skanksgiving.
1863
01:11:51.520 --> 01:11:54.119
What are the traditions? Is it the same as Thanksgiving?
1864
01:11:54.159 --> 01:11:55.260
No, no, no. Very different.
1865
01:11:56.000 --> 01:11:58.479
For Skanksgiving, you go around and say what you're most
1866
01:11:58.800 --> 01:11:59.380
slutty for.
1867
01:12:00.720 --> 01:12:03.390
Oh, man. That's a long list. Okay, okay.
1868
01:12:03.430 --> 01:12:06.590
So that's a little bit different. You dressed, of course,
1869
01:12:06.609 --> 01:12:08.750
you dressed in a sexy Halloween costume.
1870
01:12:08.770 --> 01:12:09.050
Sure, yeah.
1871
01:12:09.069 --> 01:12:10.250
You've been that way for a month.
1872
01:12:10.529 --> 01:12:12.119
By the way, we haven't talked about our costumes.
1873
01:12:12.159 --> 01:12:12.729
No, no, no.
1874
01:12:12.779 --> 01:12:15.880
No, I mean, I'm sexy Native American, obviously.
1875
01:12:15.899 --> 01:12:17.640
The feathered headdress.
1876
01:12:17.659 --> 01:12:18.020
Mm-hmm.
1877
01:12:18.619 --> 01:12:20.569
Around my ass.
1878
01:12:20.970 --> 01:12:22.949
Well, there's several things that could ruin you in that
1879
01:12:23.050 --> 01:12:24.050
costume idea.
1880
01:12:24.090 --> 01:12:28.609
No, Scott's uncancellable. Here, the Speed Force is uncancellable. What
1881
01:12:28.689 --> 01:12:29.479
are you, though?
1882
01:12:29.489 --> 01:12:30.060
I can't quite tell.
1883
01:12:30.149 --> 01:12:33.840
I am sexy Scott Ackerman. Oh, okay. I wondered. The sweater,
1884
01:12:33.859 --> 01:12:34.159
the G-string.
1885
01:12:34.199 --> 01:12:36.640
That's why you painted all those old, old lines on
1886
01:12:36.699 --> 01:12:37.239
your face.
1887
01:12:37.279 --> 01:12:39.010
Yeah, exactly.
1888
01:12:39.050 --> 01:12:40.930
That's why your dick is so small.
1889
01:12:40.970 --> 01:12:41.250
Well.
1890
01:12:41.729 --> 01:12:42.729
Yeah, exactly.
1891
01:12:42.750 --> 01:12:44.390
That is why my dick is so small.
1892
01:12:44.409 --> 01:12:45.569
It does seem you went out of your way to
1893
01:12:45.609 --> 01:12:46.970
let us know that you have a small dick in
1894
01:12:46.989 --> 01:12:49.350
that costume. There's like the little outline on the pants.
1895
01:12:50.430 --> 01:12:51.409
I had to go all out.
1896
01:12:54.069 --> 01:12:57.229
Another holiday of Skanksgiving is to play ska.
1897
01:12:56.970 --> 01:12:58.750
Bands who like to skank.
1898
01:12:58.770 --> 01:13:01.689
So it's only ska music on Skanksgiving.
1899
01:13:01.710 --> 01:13:03.449
Like which ones?
1900
01:13:03.729 --> 01:13:05.069
Let's see.
1901
01:13:05.390 --> 01:13:07.270
Are we talking second wave, third wave?
1902
01:13:07.369 --> 01:13:10.539
Well, in the dreamscape, it's only the dreams of these
1903
01:13:10.579 --> 01:13:11.819
ska bands.
1904
01:13:11.939 --> 01:13:12.399
Oh, okay.
1905
01:13:12.500 --> 01:13:14.899
All waves would be welcome, but also just the dreams
1906
01:13:14.979 --> 01:13:15.279
of them.
1907
01:13:15.460 --> 01:13:16.800
Like a Pie Tasters? Yeah.
1908
01:13:17.880 --> 01:13:21.340
Are they a band? Or are you just dreaming about
1909
01:13:21.380 --> 01:13:22.020
people tasting pie?
1910
01:13:22.060 --> 01:13:23.760
Is that the thing we're sluttiest for?
1911
01:13:23.960 --> 01:13:26.229
I know I didn't bring my pie, so don't rub
1912
01:13:26.270 --> 01:13:27.590
it in everyone's face, okay?
1913
01:13:28.670 --> 01:13:31.170
I also do have some delicacies that only exist in dreams.
1914
01:13:31.329 --> 01:13:31.890
Oh, I love that.
1915
01:13:31.909 --> 01:13:33.010
I'm so hungry right now.
1916
01:13:33.029 --> 01:13:34.390
It's not like turkey or.
1917
01:13:34.409 --> 01:13:36.210
I'm surprised we went to sleep. We had so much
1918
01:13:36.260 --> 01:13:37.180
of that rare candy.
1919
01:13:37.229 --> 01:13:39.520
Yeah, but you know what? I'm fucking... I know that
1920
01:13:39.539 --> 01:13:41.199
my body is twitching right now. Yeah.
1921
01:13:41.800 --> 01:13:43.140
I'm grateful for it because I wouldn't be able to
1922
01:13:43.159 --> 01:13:47.560
see it unless you were unconscious. Here's a delicacy. This
1923
01:13:47.859 --> 01:13:52.350
has not existed except since the old times. Prehistory delicacies.
1924
01:13:52.369 --> 01:13:55.890
These only exist in people's dreams. Yes, that have been
1925
01:13:55.949 --> 01:13:58.229
talked about and passed down through oral history.
1926
01:13:58.250 --> 01:13:59.189
Through the oral tradition.
1927
01:13:59.329 --> 01:14:03.329
That's correct. So they only live in very few people's dreams, but.
1928
01:14:03.399 --> 01:14:04.600
I have it for you here.
1929
01:14:04.619 --> 01:14:09.470
This is banana bread. Oh, no, we.
1930
01:14:09.739 --> 01:14:12.149
Maybe it's different on CBP World, too.
1931
01:14:12.170 --> 01:14:14.850
Banana bread.
1932
01:14:14.890 --> 01:14:16.369
Okay, yeah, Dash don't have that.
1933
01:14:16.409 --> 01:14:20.670
The most exotic of desserts here. Probably only in ancient Persia, the.
1934
01:14:20.590 --> 01:14:24.689
Oldest of the... It's not curry at all.
1935
01:14:24.770 --> 01:14:27.479
It's not curry. Okay, well, enjoy the banana bread.
1936
01:14:27.579 --> 01:14:30.180
Thanks, no, we have it. We have that kind of thing.
1937
01:14:30.199 --> 01:14:31.899
Sort of the mech of treats.
1938
01:14:32.359 --> 01:14:36.060
I have this shit that's a bit better beyond banana bread.
1939
01:14:36.079 --> 01:14:38.140
By the way, this tastes like wood chips, right?
1940
01:14:38.520 --> 01:14:40.720
The way banana bread is supposed to be in dreams.
1941
01:14:41.159 --> 01:14:41.539
Oh, okay.
1942
01:14:41.619 --> 01:14:44.439
All right, here's a second delicacy. This is an ancient
1943
01:14:44.520 --> 01:14:48.050
one from an undersea kingdom whose records have been lost
1944
01:14:48.090 --> 01:14:48.850
to modern time.
1945
01:14:48.869 --> 01:14:49.909
Oh, okay.
1946
01:14:50.170 --> 01:14:51.510
Mike and Ike's candy.
1947
01:14:51.630 --> 01:14:52.010
Okay.
1948
01:14:52.090 --> 01:14:53.670
Little boxes, pass them around.
1949
01:14:53.750 --> 01:14:57.149
Wait, Mike and Ike were Atlantean? Yes, Mike and Ike
1950
01:14:57.189 --> 01:14:57.869
were Atlantean.
1951
01:14:58.029 --> 01:15:00.430
This is a delicacy only the kings and queens of
1952
01:15:00.510 --> 01:15:02.979
Atlantis would enjoy Mike and Ike's.
1953
01:15:03.020 --> 01:15:05.859
We have these. These are pretty shitty gummy candies. Oh,
1954
01:15:05.880 --> 01:15:06.359
they're not good?
1955
01:15:06.380 --> 01:15:06.520
Yeah.
1956
01:15:06.699 --> 01:15:07.619
Okay, well, never mind.
1957
01:15:07.720 --> 01:15:10.739
Okay, Dash, can you calm down? Everything you bring out,
1958
01:15:10.840 --> 01:15:12.340
Dash is just going nuts for.
1959
01:15:12.359 --> 01:15:13.779
I mean, he's having a great time.
1960
01:15:13.800 --> 01:15:14.659
These are good.
1961
01:15:15.020 --> 01:15:15.689
Okay, Dash.
1962
01:15:15.729 --> 01:15:16.149
You're welcome.
1963
01:15:16.170 --> 01:15:17.989
Well, just take them and re-gift them if you need
1964
01:15:18.050 --> 01:15:20.130
or whatever. All right.
1965
01:15:20.210 --> 01:15:22.010
I don't think I could even give these away, honestly.
1966
01:15:22.069 --> 01:15:22.890
Yeah, I can't either.
1967
01:15:23.029 --> 01:15:25.069
You guys really are open with what you think about
1968
01:15:25.109 --> 01:15:27.460
things in front of people, but all right, no problem.
1969
01:15:27.520 --> 01:15:32.960
Final delicacy. Just enjoy. This only existed before there were humans,
1970
01:15:33.199 --> 01:15:35.079
before there were living creatures on Earth.
1971
01:15:35.100 --> 01:15:36.939
This ought to be some president bullshit. But it was
1972
01:15:36.979 --> 01:15:39.829
the old ones. Like a fossil? Like a fossil.
1973
01:15:39.850 --> 01:15:41.090
Like a kabutops.
1974
01:15:41.229 --> 01:15:43.659
That's correct. This is a.
1975
01:15:45.890 --> 01:15:49.050
Tuna noodle casserole. Oh, God.
1976
01:15:49.090 --> 01:15:53.220
These things stink so much in my house. This one sucks. Okay,
1977
01:15:53.260 --> 01:15:55.020
I got to throw this shit back into the speed course.
1978
01:15:55.039 --> 01:15:56.699
All right, well, just think about it. Even Dash ain't
1979
01:15:56.739 --> 01:15:58.119
doing it.
1980
01:15:58.180 --> 01:16:00.109
You like tuna noodle casserole?
1981
01:16:00.149 --> 01:16:01.270
He's mad at you.
1982
01:16:01.609 --> 01:16:04.649
You take some Campbell's, you know, cream of mushroom.
1983
01:16:04.750 --> 01:16:05.010
Oh, God.
1984
01:16:05.069 --> 01:16:07.449
You take some Campbell's soup. There's soup in this?
1985
01:16:07.909 --> 01:16:08.470
Yeah, yeah.
1986
01:16:08.710 --> 01:16:12.069
You ruined the soup and the tuna. Oh, my God, Buck.
1987
01:16:12.109 --> 01:16:15.920
It looks like you're throwing up inside your bag. It's
1988
01:16:15.960 --> 01:16:18.180
a real fucking mess in here. It's corrupt.
1989
01:16:18.220 --> 01:16:19.260
I'm sorry it's clear.
1990
01:16:19.340 --> 01:16:20.960
That's fucking disgusting.
1991
01:16:21.119 --> 01:16:22.420
It's nice to see you anyway.
1992
01:16:22.720 --> 01:16:25.840
I asked you to bring... I asked you to bring...
1993
01:16:26.140 --> 01:16:27.119
Thanksgiving dinner.
1994
01:16:27.340 --> 01:16:27.520
Yes.
1995
01:16:27.640 --> 01:16:29.390
And this is the bullshit that you.
1996
01:16:29.489 --> 01:16:32.850
This is the finest delicacy.
1997
01:16:33.329 --> 01:16:36.369
You know what, Morpheus? I'll allow you to continue to
1998
01:16:36.430 --> 01:16:39.390
live in our own universe from today on. Oh, I
1999
01:16:39.439 --> 01:16:39.659
love it.
2000
01:16:39.989 --> 01:16:43.300
Morpheus has returned. I love respecting continuity. Yeah, I would
2001
01:16:43.319 --> 01:16:45.819
love it if he came back to CBB World 1
2002
01:16:45.819 --> 01:16:47.500
with us. I mean, I'd like to have Morpheus back
2003
01:16:47.539 --> 01:16:47.899
on the show.
2004
01:16:47.920 --> 01:16:50.920
Morpheus, we'll bring you back to CBB World 1, but
2005
01:16:50.939 --> 01:16:53.050
I got to say... You didn't deliver today.
2006
01:16:53.189 --> 01:16:53.590
Yeah.
2007
01:16:53.609 --> 01:16:56.170
I appreciate your honesty. And you are welcome in the
2008
01:16:56.210 --> 01:16:57.510
dreamscape anytime you sleep.
2009
01:16:57.689 --> 01:16:58.529
All right.
2010
01:16:58.569 --> 01:16:59.770
I mean, that's kind of your job.
2011
01:16:59.810 --> 01:17:02.390
It's like saying you're welcome to going to Bed Bath
2012
01:17:02.470 --> 01:17:05.210
& Beyond anytime you want to go. Still, you're welcome here.
2013
01:17:05.250 --> 01:17:05.970
You're welcome here.
2014
01:17:06.430 --> 01:17:07.649
Scott, please, no.
2015
01:17:07.989 --> 01:17:08.909
We don't want you there.
2016
01:17:09.069 --> 01:17:11.909
You're all welcome here. Can we wake up?
2017
01:17:12.260 --> 01:17:12.640
Yeah, yeah.
2018
01:17:12.680 --> 01:17:13.050
Let's do it.
2019
01:17:13.279 --> 01:17:17.039
Okay. Oh, my God. That was a crazy dream.
2020
01:17:17.260 --> 01:17:18.560
You're back asleep real quick.
2021
01:17:18.760 --> 01:17:18.960
Okay.
2022
01:17:19.100 --> 01:17:21.079
I'm going to keep listening, and whenever I want to talk,
2023
01:17:21.100 --> 01:17:22.180
you'll just fall asleep real quick.
2024
01:17:22.199 --> 01:17:22.560
Absolutely.
2025
01:17:22.600 --> 01:17:25.819
You're awake. You're awake. You're awake. Damn it, Scott. I
2026
01:17:25.819 --> 01:17:27.239
went back to sleep for just like two seconds, it
2027
01:17:27.260 --> 01:17:30.729
felt like. Scott, I'm so sorry, because it's coming towards
2028
01:17:30.770 --> 01:17:32.550
the end of Speed Force Thanksgiving right now, and.
2029
01:17:32.489 --> 01:17:35.449
I feel like I'm just so hungry for companionship.
2030
01:17:35.489 --> 01:17:39.100
There's no food. I mean, there's a motley crew of Yeah.
2031
01:17:39.239 --> 01:17:41.020
I'm going to say weirdos here. Some of the worst
2032
01:17:41.060 --> 01:17:45.319
guests I've ever had on the show. I unfortunately also
2033
01:17:45.500 --> 01:17:46.380
puked in real life.
2034
01:17:46.859 --> 01:17:47.359
Yeah.
2035
01:17:48.300 --> 01:17:49.340
You mama cast this.
2036
01:17:51.939 --> 01:17:54.430
You know what, Scott? Maybe I was... Scott, you know,
2037
01:17:54.449 --> 01:17:55.590
I think I might have been... Okay, you're back in.
2038
01:17:55.590 --> 01:17:57.550
I'm back in. I might have been thinking about this
2039
01:17:57.630 --> 01:18:01.100
all wrong, Scott. I've been here trying to make you
2040
01:18:01.159 --> 01:18:04.979
be thankful for things in your past, Scott. Okay.
2041
01:18:05.199 --> 01:18:07.689
I can see where you're going with this.
2042
01:18:07.779 --> 01:18:13.850
Maybe. We're ending it now? No, no, no. What I
2043
01:18:13.890 --> 01:18:15.250
was going to say is. Oh, okay.
2044
01:18:15.270 --> 01:18:15.689
There's more.
2045
01:18:15.789 --> 01:18:20.329
There's more. Maybe, Scott, you could be thankful for guests
2046
01:18:20.670 --> 01:18:22.109
from the future, Scott.
2047
01:18:22.569 --> 01:18:23.289
Okay.
2048
01:18:23.310 --> 01:18:25.170
You mean guests I haven't even met yet?
2049
01:18:25.270 --> 01:18:25.850
Yes, Scott.
2050
01:18:26.250 --> 01:18:26.510
You know.
2051
01:18:27.260 --> 01:18:29.100
Because I have the powers of the flesh, I can
2052
01:18:29.220 --> 01:18:31.859
run into the future, Scott. Oh, of course, yes. Well established.
2053
01:18:32.350 --> 01:18:34.529
And I have seen the future of comedy.
2054
01:18:34.189 --> 01:18:34.670
Bang, bang.
2055
01:18:34.829 --> 01:18:38.529
Oh, my God. Is it good? Am I canceled? I
2056
01:18:38.569 --> 01:18:41.109
don't want to really get into the details of that. Okay. Yeah,
2057
01:18:42.430 --> 01:18:44.250
you're kind of canceled. I'm kind of canceled. That's fine.
2058
01:18:44.329 --> 01:18:47.210
Everyone will be. By that point, everybody's canceled. We're all
2059
01:18:47.250 --> 01:18:48.510
walking around canceled. It's all good.
2060
01:18:48.529 --> 01:18:49.850
Was it the Halloween costume?
2061
01:18:49.890 --> 01:18:57.029
Yeah. it was. Really? So I'm canceled immediately after this episode? Mm-hmm. Scott,
2062
01:18:57.260 --> 01:18:59.420
I'm going to travel into the future and bring one
2063
01:18:59.460 --> 01:19:02.939
of your favorite guests that you haven't even met yet, Scott.
2064
01:19:03.140 --> 01:19:04.460
Okay, great.
2065
01:19:04.779 --> 01:19:06.880
Are you ready? Yeah. All right. I don't think I
2066
01:19:06.880 --> 01:19:07.880
have to take a shit again.
2067
01:19:08.420 --> 01:19:09.960
You feeling light?
2068
01:19:10.039 --> 01:19:11.619
You can travel to the future? Here we go. Yeah.
2069
01:19:11.739 --> 01:19:12.460
Actually, you know what?
2070
01:19:13.140 --> 01:19:13.939
I might just walk.
2071
01:19:14.060 --> 01:19:14.619
Let me just.
2072
01:19:14.739 --> 01:19:15.020
Okay.
2073
01:19:15.050 --> 01:19:15.239
Yeah.
2074
01:19:15.270 --> 01:19:16.329
If you can get there by walking.
2075
01:19:16.390 --> 01:19:17.130
I want to walk.
2076
01:19:17.229 --> 01:19:18.149
I'll be right back, y'all.
2077
01:19:18.170 --> 01:19:18.550
Okay.
2078
01:19:20.170 --> 01:19:20.770
Oh, shit.
2079
01:19:20.810 --> 01:19:21.850
Walking still hurt, too.
2080
01:19:22.229 --> 01:19:22.630
Okay.
2081
01:19:22.970 --> 01:19:23.630
Yeah.
2082
01:19:23.810 --> 01:19:25.329
I cramped up a little bit when I was on
2083
01:19:25.350 --> 01:19:28.399
my way back. Damn, Scott. Ooh, okay. I had to
2084
01:19:28.439 --> 01:19:31.659
stay at a hotel halfway. That shit sucked. But Scott,
2085
01:19:31.819 --> 01:19:38.300
I brought your favorite guest, Scott. His name? Ron Snapper, Scott.
2086
01:19:38.439 --> 01:19:39.180
Ron Snapper.
2087
01:19:39.220 --> 01:19:40.119
That's right, Scott.
2088
01:19:40.140 --> 01:19:42.779
Okay, so this is like a taste of what's to come.
2089
01:19:42.800 --> 01:19:45.020
This taste of CBB World futures. I'm a taste of
2090
01:19:45.050 --> 01:19:48.210
your future, Scott. It's me, Ron Snapper. Nice to meet you.
2091
01:19:48.270 --> 01:19:49.409
Hello.
2092
01:19:49.430 --> 01:19:49.630
Hi.
2093
01:19:49.689 --> 01:19:51.510
Strange. Strange to be meeting.
2094
01:19:51.189 --> 01:19:54.409
You when I've already met you so many times. This
2095
01:19:54.449 --> 01:19:56.989
is like a Doctor Who, you know, river situation.
2096
01:19:57.010 --> 01:19:58.670
I don't know what you're talking about. They don't have
2097
01:19:58.689 --> 01:20:00.609
Doctor Who in the future? No, I just don't know.
2098
01:20:01.350 --> 01:20:05.090
I just don't know what that is, okay? You're coming
2099
01:20:05.149 --> 01:20:07.850
in so hot, even hotter than Ruby. Well, this is
2100
01:20:07.890 --> 01:20:10.050
how we got to make it in the podcast world, okay?
2101
01:20:10.090 --> 01:20:12.600
I know a little something about podcasting. I am, of course,
2102
01:20:12.640 --> 01:20:16.039
the host of Podcast Rescue. This is the preeminent podcast
2103
01:20:16.100 --> 01:20:19.539
rescue reality show. It plays exclusively on those TVs at
2104
01:20:19.560 --> 01:20:25.600
gas stations. Oh, okay. Okay, so that's your deal. That's correct.
2105
01:20:25.720 --> 01:20:26.100
Yeah.
2106
01:20:26.300 --> 01:20:28.859
If you want to encapsulate it in one short little sound.
2107
01:20:28.659 --> 01:20:29.979
Bite, that's my deal.
2108
01:20:30.560 --> 01:20:31.880
Is that how you met Scott?
2109
01:20:32.539 --> 01:20:33.920
That is how I met Scott.
2110
01:20:33.979 --> 01:20:36.000
But I've had you, wait, I met you and then
2111
01:20:36.060 --> 01:20:36.819
had you on the show?
2112
01:20:36.859 --> 01:20:38.979
No, no, no. You were ambushed by me.
2113
01:20:39.819 --> 01:20:39.920
Oh.
2114
01:20:40.500 --> 01:20:43.520
You were hosting a normal edition of your show. Okay.
2115
01:20:44.079 --> 01:20:47.439
I first appeared on your show sometime in late 2021,
2116
01:20:47.439 --> 01:20:48.079
maybe early 2022.
2117
01:20:48.060 --> 01:20:49.479
It's definitely not late 2021.
2118
01:20:49.460 --> 01:20:52.460
It's not? Okay.
2119
01:20:52.880 --> 01:20:56.380
Run it out of runway in regards to that. You know,
2120
01:20:56.399 --> 01:20:56.899
who knows?
2121
01:20:56.979 --> 01:20:59.810
And 2022 is maybe a little optimistic for you as well.
2122
01:20:59.829 --> 01:21:03.409
Got it, got it. Well, that was convenient for you, Scott.
2123
01:21:03.810 --> 01:21:06.069
Yeah, who knows? But who knows what it is? But yeah,
2124
01:21:06.090 --> 01:21:08.229
who knows what can happen? People can drop out.
2125
01:21:08.329 --> 01:21:08.770
Of course.
2126
01:21:09.510 --> 01:21:11.850
What happened was a lot of your past guests and
2127
01:21:11.890 --> 01:21:14.569
producers contacted me. They said, Scott is running one of
2128
01:21:14.590 --> 01:21:19.739
the worst podcasts in podcasting. This is a true shit show,
2129
01:21:19.779 --> 01:21:22.939
was what one guest said. God, why would Devin do this?
2130
01:21:24.699 --> 01:21:26.840
I don't know who you're talking about.
2131
01:21:28.449 --> 01:21:31.170
Yeah, it was. It was Francesca.
2132
01:21:31.189 --> 01:21:33.329
I assume I am still on the show?
2133
01:21:33.350 --> 01:21:33.850
That's correct.
2134
01:21:33.890 --> 01:21:37.439
Yes, okay. In fact, all of these guests are my
2135
01:21:37.489 --> 01:21:40.880
recon spies. I sent them in ahead to be guests
2136
01:21:40.939 --> 01:21:43.600
on this podcast, experience it from the guest chair, and
2137
01:21:43.680 --> 01:21:45.239
figure out just how terrible it was.
2138
01:21:45.340 --> 01:21:47.659
Go ahead, everyone. Tell them what a terrible time you've
2139
01:21:47.680 --> 01:21:48.840
had on this show.
2140
01:21:49.279 --> 01:21:52.600
You told me I was, what was the word? Opaque.
2141
01:21:53.359 --> 01:21:56.130
Opaque. I did? Yeah.
2142
01:21:56.289 --> 01:21:58.060
I don't even know what that means, Barry.
2143
01:21:58.069 --> 01:22:01.359
Me neither, but it sounded like there was malice behind it. Yeah, yeah.
2144
01:22:01.420 --> 01:22:03.500
Well, I'll attribute the time that I had on the
2145
01:22:03.539 --> 01:22:06.340
show to it being a trick for you.
2146
01:22:06.460 --> 01:22:08.380
That's what happened. Yeah, I had a bad time. Well,
2147
01:22:08.399 --> 01:22:09.420
I mean, you sucked, though.
2148
01:22:09.439 --> 01:22:13.039
No, no, it's not that. Yeah, I sucked because the
2149
01:22:13.100 --> 01:22:15.970
experience was bad. Listen to how you're talking to these guests, Scott.
2150
01:22:16.060 --> 01:22:17.369
You're all asleep. You're all asleep.
2151
01:22:17.430 --> 01:22:19.210
Okay. I actually had a great time. I miss you.
2152
01:22:19.630 --> 01:22:21.710
I wanted to come to this universe. It kind of
2153
01:22:21.750 --> 01:22:22.149
worked out.
2154
01:22:22.189 --> 01:22:23.189
I'm happy to have you.
2155
01:22:23.270 --> 01:22:25.770
I did agree to spy, and he had a dream
2156
01:22:25.789 --> 01:22:26.789
and asked me, but then I was like, it all
2157
01:22:26.810 --> 01:22:27.350
kind of worked out.
2158
01:22:27.369 --> 01:22:28.250
Morpheus was an outlier.
2159
01:22:28.270 --> 01:22:30.229
We cut his footage out of the episode because we
2160
01:22:30.250 --> 01:22:31.569
didn't really support the narrative.
2161
01:22:31.640 --> 01:22:32.760
It would be a terrible one.
2162
01:22:32.779 --> 01:22:34.560
You got to kill your darlings. Okay, you're awake.
2163
01:22:34.760 --> 01:22:35.060
That's right.
2164
01:22:36.949 --> 01:22:42.500
So I was brought in to save your podcast. May
2165
01:22:42.560 --> 01:22:44.899
I say your deal, if I may be so bold,
2166
01:22:45.340 --> 01:22:47.000
is very complicated right off the bat.
2167
01:22:47.560 --> 01:22:48.100
I'm not following.
2168
01:22:48.140 --> 01:22:50.539
I would strip it like suddenly you've hired spies and
2169
01:22:50.579 --> 01:22:53.460
like we haven't even established really what Podcast Rescue is.
2170
01:22:53.479 --> 01:22:58.119
Podcast Rescue is a show where I rescue podcasts. I
2171
01:22:58.180 --> 01:23:00.500
come in. I am one of the great producers of
2172
01:23:00.520 --> 01:23:02.600
podcasts of all time. I'm in the Podcast Hall of Fame.
2173
01:23:02.779 --> 01:23:04.819
You are. There's a podcast hall of fame. There's a
2174
01:23:04.840 --> 01:23:05.579
podcast hall of fame.
2175
01:23:05.600 --> 01:23:07.880
Who's on Mount Podmore in the future?
2176
01:23:08.300 --> 01:23:12.560
Well, of course, it is the podfather himself, Ricky Gervais. Oh, okay.
2177
01:23:12.800 --> 01:23:16.090
Conan's up there. Conan is up there. Dax Shepard, who
2178
01:23:16.729 --> 01:23:18.439
I was the one who convinced him he was interesting.
2179
01:23:18.590 --> 01:23:22.149
The office ladies. The office ladies are up there. But Scott,
2180
01:23:22.170 --> 01:23:25.930
I got good news. From where I'm sitting in 2036.
2181
01:23:25.930 --> 01:23:27.670
You're on Mount Podmore right now.
2182
01:23:27.710 --> 01:23:28.689
Yes, really?
2183
01:23:28.729 --> 01:23:31.569
That's right. So this is a big Mount Podmore. How
2184
01:23:31.609 --> 01:23:35.050
many heads? There's about 25 heads. Whoa, okay. I've only
2185
01:23:35.069 --> 01:23:37.899
scratched the surface on the heads. Where is this Podmore
2186
01:23:37.979 --> 01:23:44.819
in Minnesota? Wow. The derogatory tone. Yeah, it's in Minneapolis. Oh. Yeah.
2187
01:23:45.859 --> 01:23:49.220
He's dead on. Well, how did you fix this podcast?
2188
01:23:49.300 --> 01:23:51.319
Because maybe we could get a heads up on it
2189
01:23:51.340 --> 01:23:53.000
right now. No, this would be a good time.
2190
01:23:53.020 --> 01:23:54.779
Because when I came in and I gave my signature
2191
01:23:54.859 --> 01:23:59.130
tough love and I burst into your studio and screamed at.
2192
01:23:59.149 --> 01:24:00.869
You at the top of my lungs. This sounds like
2193
01:24:00.930 --> 01:24:03.869
a terrible episode. It has to happen. It was a
2194
01:24:03.909 --> 01:24:08.250
great episode. People love it. Highly reviewed.
2195
01:24:08.750 --> 01:24:11.170
And I went on to become your most frequent guest
2196
01:24:11.369 --> 01:24:12.029
of all time.
2197
01:24:12.189 --> 01:24:16.359
Okay. I mean, look, I believe it if you're saying it.
2198
01:24:16.420 --> 01:24:17.239
Would I lie to you?
2199
01:24:17.699 --> 01:24:19.899
You need to open your ears and accept the truth.
2200
01:24:19.939 --> 01:24:22.819
This is just the beginning. I don't think he's a liar, Scott.
2201
01:24:23.319 --> 01:24:25.960
Scott, where your podcast is at right now, you're losing $ 820, 000
2202
01:24:25.859 --> 01:24:29.699
a month. I'm losing money doing the podcast?
2203
01:24:29.720 --> 01:24:32.069
You're losing $ 820, 000 from this podcast, okay?
2204
01:24:32.529 --> 01:24:36.449
From lack of efficiency, okay? Really, it's just efficiency. Lack
2205
01:24:36.489 --> 01:24:41.210
of efficiency. Shoddy works with ship, okay? Failure to focus.
2206
01:24:41.229 --> 01:24:43.170
But we've never lost money before, and I've been shoddy
2207
01:24:43.210 --> 01:24:45.739
this whole time. Yeah, well, you made some bad investments,
2208
01:24:45.819 --> 01:24:48.100
and I think Rudy might have written a couple checks
2209
01:24:48.119 --> 01:24:48.640
in your name.
2210
01:24:48.659 --> 01:24:51.859
I did. I'm sorry about that. Oh, you're writing bad paper, Rudy? Yeah,
2211
01:24:51.920 --> 01:24:53.739
I'm writing bad paper. I need to take one of
2212
01:24:53.760 --> 01:24:55.449
those classes. You got to take a class.
2213
01:24:55.630 --> 01:24:56.390
So what did you do?
2214
01:24:56.409 --> 01:24:57.590
I mean, how did you turn it around?
2215
01:24:57.609 --> 01:24:59.369
We don't want to spoil the episode, but... No, of
2216
01:24:59.390 --> 01:25:01.289
course we don't want to spoil the episode, because that's what?
2217
01:25:01.550 --> 01:25:02.930
Bad podcasting, okay?
2218
01:25:03.029 --> 01:25:03.989
Okay, yeah.
2219
01:25:04.010 --> 01:25:06.060
You want to keep that, okay? No, here's what I did.
2220
01:25:06.100 --> 01:25:07.779
I came in, I offered my tough love, I gave
2221
01:25:07.800 --> 01:25:10.819
you some... some guidelines of like, you know, for example,
2222
01:25:10.840 --> 01:25:12.579
first of all, did you check any of these people's
2223
01:25:12.640 --> 01:25:15.800
IDs before they came in? I haven't even thought about
2224
01:25:15.819 --> 01:25:16.140
doing that.
2225
01:25:16.159 --> 01:25:18.130
You didn't check a single ID. What am I checking for?
2226
01:25:18.140 --> 01:25:20.100
This room could be full of 18 year olds and
2227
01:25:20.119 --> 01:25:22.449
you got no idea. What would be wrong with that?
2228
01:25:22.630 --> 01:25:24.529
I don't know.
2229
01:25:24.609 --> 01:25:25.130
Hold on.
2230
01:25:25.210 --> 01:25:27.289
Maybe we should check everybody's IDs. Francesca, can I see
2231
01:25:27.310 --> 01:25:28.229
your ID real quick?
2232
01:25:28.310 --> 01:25:32.260
No, no. So no?
2233
01:25:32.800 --> 01:25:33.079
No.
2234
01:25:33.300 --> 01:25:33.779
Okay.
2235
01:25:33.800 --> 01:25:36.500
She said no. What are we supposed to do? Then
2236
01:25:36.520 --> 01:25:37.659
you just got to ask. Okay.
2237
01:25:37.680 --> 01:25:39.899
You're only liable for asking. You just got to check
2238
01:25:39.939 --> 01:25:41.060
and ask and they go, no, thank you. Is that
2239
01:25:41.079 --> 01:25:43.350
the same like legal for bars? Like they just got
2240
01:25:43.369 --> 01:25:45.229
to ask you and you say no? People don't know that.
2241
01:25:45.270 --> 01:25:49.270
This one trick that everyone... People don't know. In a
2242
01:25:49.550 --> 01:25:51.789
bar hate. You go up. They say, can I see
2243
01:25:51.810 --> 01:25:52.329
your ID?
2244
01:25:52.630 --> 01:25:55.939
You go, that's actually a violation of HIPAA.
2245
01:25:56.270 --> 01:25:57.680
Oh, HIPAA.
2246
01:25:57.699 --> 01:25:58.920
God. Always using HIPAA.
2247
01:25:58.979 --> 01:26:01.560
Always using HIPAA. Now, Dash, can I see your ID, please? Uh-huh.
2248
01:26:01.699 --> 01:26:02.539
Here's a Pokedex.
2249
01:26:02.560 --> 01:26:04.439
Okay, I don't know what the fuck this is.
2250
01:26:04.539 --> 01:26:06.920
This is a digital ID that tells me all the
2251
01:26:06.960 --> 01:26:08.460
Pokemon I caught and also my name.
2252
01:26:08.539 --> 01:26:10.279
I'm 12.
2253
01:26:10.279 --> 01:26:10.869
Yeah, he's 12.
2254
01:26:10.859 --> 01:26:12.359
Is that cool that he's 12? 12 is cool as
2255
01:26:12.399 --> 01:26:14.479
long as he has an ID that I can read.
2256
01:26:14.510 --> 01:26:15.010
I don't care.
2257
01:26:15.149 --> 01:26:17.449
I'm drunk and.
2258
01:26:17.090 --> 01:26:19.689
I know it's candy. And that's something I, that's some
2259
01:26:19.750 --> 01:26:21.289
of the tough love I got to give. You got
2260
01:26:21.329 --> 01:26:24.510
a room full of people snorting cocaine on Stank's Garage.
2261
01:26:24.529 --> 01:26:26.510
This is cocaine? This is cocaine? I thought this was
2262
01:26:26.569 --> 01:26:30.829
rare candy. Rare candy? Did you bring any? Of course
2263
01:26:30.930 --> 01:26:34.539
I brought some. I'm fueled by rare candy. But only
2264
01:26:34.699 --> 01:26:36.819
I can do it because I'm not on the clock.
2265
01:26:37.560 --> 01:26:38.979
I can feel my stomach.
2266
01:26:39.560 --> 01:26:42.779
You got a one foot tall woman who can't feel
2267
01:26:42.800 --> 01:26:43.420
her stomach.
2268
01:26:43.699 --> 01:26:44.439
You're all asleep.
2269
01:26:44.659 --> 01:26:46.010
We're asleep now.
2270
01:26:46.149 --> 01:26:50.829
Somebody wanted to see my identification. I don't have traditional identification.
2271
01:26:50.850 --> 01:26:51.569
What is this?
2272
01:26:52.310 --> 01:26:54.189
This is a furry creature called a grouse.
2273
01:26:54.550 --> 01:26:55.960
Oh, okay. Did we ask it?
2274
01:26:55.979 --> 01:26:58.479
Yeah, he speaks the true names and identities of whoever
2275
01:26:58.520 --> 01:26:59.500
you thought.
2276
01:26:59.520 --> 01:27:00.680
Okay, who is your master? Ah!
2277
01:27:02.510 --> 01:27:03.369
Okay, okay.
2278
01:27:03.489 --> 01:27:04.949
Thank you, Grouth, and you're all awake.
2279
01:27:05.750 --> 01:27:07.789
I gotta accept that as an idea. Is that okay?
2280
01:27:07.909 --> 01:27:10.069
That's an okay idea, but God, I mean, listen to
2281
01:27:10.109 --> 01:27:12.920
how fractured we are. The cannon is all over the place.
2282
01:27:13.140 --> 01:27:16.619
By the way, Grouth came, he's here. Grouth is now
2283
01:27:16.699 --> 01:27:19.119
a guest on the show? He should only exist in the...
2284
01:27:19.359 --> 01:27:21.680
This episode was already running out of steam when you
2285
01:27:21.699 --> 01:27:22.739
brought in the fifth guest.
2286
01:27:22.779 --> 01:27:25.109
Now you're bringing in a sixth. What the hell is
2287
01:27:25.149 --> 01:27:25.369
going on?
2288
01:27:25.789 --> 01:27:26.390
You're right.
2289
01:27:26.430 --> 01:27:27.270
You're right.
2290
01:27:27.369 --> 01:27:28.649
We need you.
2291
01:27:28.750 --> 01:27:30.550
I can see why I've had you on the show
2292
01:27:30.590 --> 01:27:31.229
so many times.
2293
01:27:31.310 --> 01:27:31.989
Exactly.
2294
01:27:32.100 --> 01:27:33.960
I'm a creature and a big fan.
2295
01:27:35.479 --> 01:27:37.539
I'm a fan of the cast. See, now this is
2296
01:27:37.579 --> 01:27:39.649
great because this is enthusiasm. This gets into what we
2297
01:27:39.659 --> 01:27:41.250
got to do to turn this podcast around.
2298
01:27:41.409 --> 01:27:41.689
Okay?
2299
01:27:41.810 --> 01:27:42.630
All right, let's get into it.
2300
01:27:42.630 --> 01:27:45.710
To turn this podcast around, I got to hear catchphrases.
2301
01:27:45.729 --> 01:27:48.909
I haven't heard a single goddamn catchphrase. Those are my groceries!
2302
01:27:49.050 --> 01:27:50.069
Boom, boom.
2303
01:27:50.489 --> 01:27:51.630
Rouse catchphrases.
2304
01:27:51.670 --> 01:27:54.550
Those are my groceries! That is a white-hot catchphrase. That's
2305
01:27:54.569 --> 01:27:55.770
going to take you very far, Rouse.
2306
01:27:55.890 --> 01:27:56.390
Very good job.
2307
01:27:56.529 --> 01:27:57.239
Hey, appreciate it.
2308
01:27:57.449 --> 01:27:58.449
You're welcome.
2309
01:27:58.489 --> 01:27:59.310
Okay, well, does anyone else?
2310
01:27:59.390 --> 01:28:00.350
I mean, I could, like.
2311
01:28:00.649 --> 01:28:02.840
And if none of you got a catchphrase locked and loaded,
2312
01:28:03.060 --> 01:28:03.760
there's the door.
2313
01:28:03.770 --> 01:28:04.100
Okay?
2314
01:28:04.109 --> 01:28:05.239
I think that mine will be.
2315
01:28:05.300 --> 01:28:06.640
Is that your catchphrase, by the way?
2316
01:28:06.659 --> 01:28:06.909
That's one.
2317
01:28:06.939 --> 01:28:11.520
There's the door? Scott, if you don't like the catchphrases
2318
01:28:11.619 --> 01:28:13.800
I bring into the show, there's the door.
2319
01:28:13.920 --> 01:28:14.880
Okay, it works.
2320
01:28:15.300 --> 01:28:16.159
It's pretty good.
2321
01:28:16.220 --> 01:28:16.420
It works.
2322
01:28:16.439 --> 01:28:17.470
I'll tell you, it's one of the best.
2323
01:28:17.479 --> 01:28:17.810
It works.
2324
01:28:17.909 --> 01:28:21.250
Every time I say that, my listenership goes up 12%.
2325
01:28:21.250 --> 01:28:22.229
That's incredible.
2326
01:28:22.229 --> 01:28:22.270
12%.
2327
01:28:22.270 --> 01:28:25.689
Some people are listening extra hard when you say that.
2328
01:28:25.710 --> 01:28:26.689
That's correct.
2329
01:28:27.029 --> 01:28:27.300
Okay.
2330
01:28:27.439 --> 01:28:29.239
So if anyone's got one, Francesca?
2331
01:28:29.359 --> 01:28:31.220
I think mine would be, oh, no.
2332
01:28:31.300 --> 01:28:32.560
No, my tongue.
2333
01:28:33.460 --> 01:28:33.880
Oh, yeah.
2334
01:28:33.960 --> 01:28:35.550
It's good. It's good. You know what?
2335
01:28:35.560 --> 01:28:37.630
It's a different energy than a lot of catchphrases. It's
2336
01:28:37.649 --> 01:28:39.689
a lot lower, a lot softer. It's going to drop.
2337
01:28:39.810 --> 01:28:39.970
Listen.
2338
01:28:40.260 --> 01:28:41.100
In for me.
2339
01:28:40.979 --> 01:28:44.239
Those are my groceries see you can hit it as
2340
01:28:44.279 --> 01:28:45.779
many times as you want you ever don't know what
2341
01:28:45.819 --> 01:28:48.739
to say there's the door you know you just hit that.
2342
01:28:48.760 --> 01:28:53.390
I think i think mine's gonna be i catch that Nice.
2343
01:28:53.550 --> 01:28:56.729
A little sassy. I think you might be deciding a
2344
01:28:56.750 --> 01:28:57.890
little drunk right now.
2345
01:28:57.949 --> 01:28:58.399
Yeah.
2346
01:28:58.449 --> 01:29:00.800
Also, it sounds like you're on like an STD billboard
2347
01:29:00.840 --> 01:29:01.619
or something like that.
2348
01:29:01.680 --> 01:29:04.319
Yeah, I mean. A what?
2349
01:29:04.420 --> 01:29:07.029
You got an adult man talking to a 12-year-old child
2350
01:29:07.069 --> 01:29:07.890
about STDs?
2351
01:29:07.930 --> 01:29:11.569
What the hell is going on? Okay, you're right. Sorry, sorry, sir.
2352
01:29:11.890 --> 01:29:12.449
It's okay.
2353
01:29:12.569 --> 01:29:14.920
Do I call you sir in the future? Yes, we're
2354
01:29:15.020 --> 01:29:17.600
very close friends, but you call me sir.
2355
01:29:17.640 --> 01:29:20.960
Okay. Hierarchy is so important in podcasting.
2356
01:29:20.979 --> 01:29:22.409
Okay, well, you're very high status.
2357
01:29:22.590 --> 01:29:25.409
I know this. Well, now, Buck, do you have your
2358
01:29:25.430 --> 01:29:26.930
catchphrase locked in? It's a little long.
2359
01:29:27.069 --> 01:29:28.989
Okay, let's hear it.
2360
01:29:29.430 --> 01:29:30.729
Wait, is that it?
2361
01:29:31.210 --> 01:29:33.399
Speaking about the cord that has to go up my
2362
01:29:33.520 --> 01:29:35.779
ass to power the exoskeleton.
2363
01:29:35.840 --> 01:29:36.220
I like this.
2364
01:29:36.239 --> 01:29:36.659
This is good.
2365
01:29:36.680 --> 01:29:38.960
So it's like when it comes to the cord that's up.
2366
01:29:38.880 --> 01:29:41.140
My ass right now, it's a little long. It's a
2367
01:29:41.140 --> 01:29:42.939
little long. You got a guy with a cord up
2368
01:29:42.979 --> 01:29:45.399
his ass in the middle of his studio. That's unsanitary.
2369
01:29:45.439 --> 01:29:47.960
That's a health code violation. Don't forget, I'm covered in barf.
2370
01:29:48.819 --> 01:29:51.189
That's probably bad, dude. That's disgusting.
2371
01:29:51.199 --> 01:29:52.229
Can I say something?
2372
01:29:52.250 --> 01:29:52.430
Yes.
2373
01:29:52.489 --> 01:29:55.069
Okay, in my opinion, being on this podcast has been
2374
01:29:55.090 --> 01:29:59.270
so bad. It's been not fun at all. There have
2375
01:29:59.310 --> 01:30:01.050
been a lot of things that I would have changed
2376
01:30:01.090 --> 01:30:03.909
about it for you. But I want to say for them,
2377
01:30:04.100 --> 01:30:06.300
maybe you could give them advice that they need to
2378
01:30:06.319 --> 01:30:07.140
be nice to us.
2379
01:30:07.239 --> 01:30:08.340
We're your guests.
2380
01:30:08.800 --> 01:30:10.699
You guys have been mean to us the whole time.
2381
01:30:10.840 --> 01:30:12.199
Oh, I need someone better.
2382
01:30:12.300 --> 01:30:12.739
You know what?
2383
01:30:13.380 --> 01:30:14.220
Francesca, you're right.
2384
01:30:15.189 --> 01:30:16.250
Wow.
2385
01:30:16.270 --> 01:30:19.289
Wow. That is your catch right now.
2386
01:30:19.390 --> 01:30:23.340
I don't think so. I don't know if that one's
2387
01:30:23.399 --> 01:30:25.720
going to stick. I think I'll still be looking for one.
2388
01:30:25.739 --> 01:30:28.720
But Francesca, I have to say, you know, and Rudy,
2389
01:30:28.760 --> 01:30:30.220
I'm going to bring you in on this as well.
2390
01:30:31.000 --> 01:30:34.260
Skanksgiving is a time for people to look around at
2391
01:30:34.460 --> 01:30:39.630
all the sluts that he's around and really just realize that, yeah,
2392
01:30:39.689 --> 01:30:42.170
maybe we've had our differences when you've been on the
2393
01:30:42.210 --> 01:30:45.229
particular episode, but those differences are what make the show
2394
01:30:45.310 --> 01:30:48.149
really interesting and fun. And yeah, maybe we don't get
2395
01:30:48.189 --> 01:30:50.569
along and I don't find any of you.
2396
01:30:50.510 --> 01:30:55.300
Interesting, but... Wow. Grouse. That hurts grouse. But the guests do.
2397
01:30:55.399 --> 01:30:57.079
And you know what? This Skanksgiving.
2398
01:30:57.850 --> 01:31:00.239
I just want to say that I apologize if I've
2399
01:31:00.279 --> 01:31:02.659
treated you poorly and I'm so glad that all of
2400
01:31:02.699 --> 01:31:03.140
you are here.
2401
01:31:03.319 --> 01:31:03.699
Wow.
2402
01:31:03.899 --> 01:31:04.439
Wow.
2403
01:31:04.460 --> 01:31:06.770
Scott, thank you. And I'm sorry if.
2404
01:31:08.109 --> 01:31:11.380
I'm confusing for you to listen to sometimes because that's
2405
01:31:11.439 --> 01:31:12.319
not your fault.
2406
01:31:13.260 --> 01:31:13.920
I'm old.
2407
01:31:14.079 --> 01:31:16.600
I'm an old ass man. I get it. I, and yeah,
2408
01:31:16.640 --> 01:31:18.079
I don't know what a mech is. I don't know
2409
01:31:18.100 --> 01:31:21.760
what a Pokemon is, but you know, five-year-olds probably do.
2410
01:31:21.779 --> 01:31:24.750
And I could use some five-year-old listeners. So thank you guys.
2411
01:31:24.810 --> 01:31:27.689
Yeah. I, if I can apologize, I'm sorry that there's
2412
01:31:27.750 --> 01:31:30.329
just not more to who I am as a person.
2413
01:31:30.909 --> 01:31:31.729
You were pretty thin.
2414
01:31:31.770 --> 01:31:31.890
Yeah.
2415
01:31:33.569 --> 01:31:36.359
Physically and just in terms of conceptual.
2416
01:31:36.399 --> 01:31:37.399
Yeah, absolutely.
2417
01:31:38.239 --> 01:31:41.460
Grouse wants to apologize for shoehorning himself in at the
2418
01:31:41.699 --> 01:31:44.600
end here when nobody expected him.
2419
01:31:44.920 --> 01:31:47.100
To be honest, I pimped you into that and I
2420
01:31:47.149 --> 01:31:49.670
told you that you were here and then you just were.
2421
01:31:49.750 --> 01:31:53.109
Grouse appreciates it. Grouse wants more time on the cast.
2422
01:31:53.390 --> 01:31:53.850
I would like to.
2423
01:31:54.210 --> 01:31:55.090
Catch grout.
2424
01:31:55.609 --> 01:31:57.939
No, no, you can't catch grout. Not on Skank Scoop. No,
2425
01:31:57.949 --> 01:31:58.539
not on Skank Scoop.
2426
01:31:58.560 --> 01:31:58.899
You know what?
2427
01:31:58.939 --> 01:32:01.300
I want to apologize to Scott because I think I
2428
01:32:01.319 --> 01:32:03.779
have been so much funnier than you the whole time.
2429
01:32:04.199 --> 01:32:07.390
And this must be so hard for you. And I
2430
01:32:07.489 --> 01:32:09.789
never thought about it from your perspective.
2431
01:32:09.829 --> 01:32:10.909
Francesca, you're right.
2432
01:32:12.979 --> 01:32:15.779
In this Thanksgiving tradition, I'll accept your apology. But next
2433
01:32:15.800 --> 01:32:17.840
time I see you again. And I'd like to apologize
2434
01:32:17.939 --> 01:32:22.090
as well. For coming in with a gimmick about as
2435
01:32:22.109 --> 01:32:26.770
aggressive as possible. And for really, you know, coming in hot.
2436
01:32:27.390 --> 01:32:29.609
It's okay, but I mean, you know, on Skanksgiving, we
2437
01:32:29.689 --> 01:32:30.720
want people to be hot.
2438
01:32:30.810 --> 01:32:33.079
That reminds me, should I tell you what my Halloween
2439
01:32:33.100 --> 01:32:35.479
costume is? Oh, yeah, please. Yeah, we can cover that. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
2440
01:32:35.560 --> 01:32:36.300
Oh, it's no big deal.
2441
01:32:36.319 --> 01:32:38.859
It's just in honor of my favorite podcast, The Legion
2442
01:32:38.899 --> 01:32:41.500
of Skanks. I'm a sexy... Oh, no. Oh, God. I'm
2443
01:32:41.600 --> 01:32:45.680
a sexy Big Jay Oakers. Oh, shit. Sexier. That's right, yes.
2444
01:32:45.699 --> 01:32:47.859
It's basically just Big Jay without the pants.
2445
01:32:48.260 --> 01:32:48.659
Okay.
2446
01:32:49.340 --> 01:32:52.010
So that's your favorite podcast is Legion of Skanks, huh?
2447
01:32:52.479 --> 01:32:54.829
Look at their numbers. Tell me they're not doing great.
2448
01:32:55.329 --> 01:32:55.770
Okay.
2449
01:32:55.909 --> 01:32:57.909
And Rudy, most of all, I just want to say
2450
01:32:57.970 --> 01:33:00.789
I really appreciate you. I know that this may be,
2451
01:33:01.550 --> 01:33:03.890
you know, not the group of guests that I wanted,
2452
01:33:03.930 --> 01:33:05.829
but I think it's the group of guests that I needed.
2453
01:33:05.949 --> 01:33:06.409
That's right.
2454
01:33:06.470 --> 01:33:08.510
And thank you so much, Rudy. You've been such a
2455
01:33:08.550 --> 01:33:09.409
great friend to me.
2456
01:33:10.149 --> 01:33:10.869
And I apologize.
2457
01:33:10.909 --> 01:33:12.770
I've been spending so much time with Sprague and I
2458
01:33:12.829 --> 01:33:14.489
started a different, I don't know if you know this,
2459
01:33:14.510 --> 01:33:15.930
but we started a different show together.
2460
01:33:15.949 --> 01:33:16.369
Say what now?
2461
01:33:16.470 --> 01:33:16.529
No.
2462
01:33:17.609 --> 01:33:20.800
I apologize. You're not watching old movies and talking about them,
2463
01:33:20.840 --> 01:33:22.920
are you? Yeah, just like every other podcast. Scott, that
2464
01:33:22.960 --> 01:33:24.699
was our thing. We talked about that at Speed Force
2465
01:33:24.720 --> 01:33:27.060
Thanksgiving four years ago. Sorry, but then you disappeared.
2466
01:33:27.300 --> 01:33:31.140
But look, Rudy, I want to reestablish our relationship. And
2467
01:33:31.180 --> 01:33:34.439
Thanksgiving here, it wouldn't be possible without you. So thank
2468
01:33:34.460 --> 01:33:34.979
you so much.
2469
01:33:35.060 --> 01:33:39.930
Well, thank you so much, Scott, and to all our guests. Scott,
2470
01:33:39.970 --> 01:33:45.189
I just have one important question for you. Did you
2471
01:33:45.289 --> 01:33:51.140
have a good time, Scott? You know what, Rudy? Oh,
2472
01:33:51.619 --> 01:33:54.060
should we get the turkey before I? Oh, yeah.
2473
01:33:54.100 --> 01:33:55.100
Let me go get the turkey.
2474
01:33:55.159 --> 01:33:57.779
What am I thinking over here? Not get the turkey. Scott,
2475
01:33:57.800 --> 01:33:59.039
I'm going to go get this turkey.
2476
01:33:59.060 --> 01:33:59.960
Put a pin in my answer.
2477
01:33:59.979 --> 01:34:01.770
Put a pin in your answer and I'll be right back.
2478
01:34:01.810 --> 01:34:03.170
I was going to say yes, but let's have the
2479
01:34:03.189 --> 01:34:04.430
turkey first. Let me go take out the turkey. You
2480
01:34:04.449 --> 01:34:04.750
know what?
2481
01:34:04.869 --> 01:34:07.010
I bring a lot of turkey with me from Bed
2482
01:34:07.029 --> 01:34:07.470
Bath & Beyond.
2483
01:34:08.289 --> 01:34:11.510
I don't want to. I actually have a good turkey, Francesca.
2484
01:34:11.649 --> 01:34:14.699
Rudy's been cooking this all for the past five years.
2485
01:34:14.760 --> 01:34:16.760
I have some loose turkey jerky in my pocket.
2486
01:34:16.779 --> 01:34:19.159
No, don't need that shit, because I marinated this turkey
2487
01:34:19.260 --> 01:34:19.960
for a decade.
2488
01:34:19.979 --> 01:34:20.739
Grouse is turkey.
2489
01:34:20.880 --> 01:34:21.359
You're turkey?
2490
01:34:21.500 --> 01:34:21.720
Yeah.
2491
01:34:22.079 --> 01:34:23.979
If you want to eat me, I'll just be recreated.
2492
01:34:25.039 --> 01:34:27.640
Okay, you know what? I have a turkey, and we
2493
01:34:27.659 --> 01:34:29.399
can all have this turkey. Let me just go check
2494
01:34:29.470 --> 01:34:31.109
on it in the kitchen. Okay, yeah, great.
2495
01:34:33.510 --> 01:34:34.130
No!
2496
01:34:34.510 --> 01:34:38.369
No! Oh, my God.
2497
01:34:39.449 --> 01:34:39.829
Oh, no!
2498
01:34:39.890 --> 01:34:40.930
Rudy, everything okay in there?
2499
01:34:40.949 --> 01:34:41.270
Scott!
2500
01:34:41.689 --> 01:34:45.750
Scott! Scott! Rudy, are you taking another shit? No, Scott. I, um...
2501
01:34:46.430 --> 01:34:47.909
About the turkey, I, um.
2502
01:34:47.949 --> 01:34:49.399
Yeah, my mouth is watering.
2503
01:34:49.420 --> 01:34:50.439
You just even bringing it up.
2504
01:34:50.819 --> 01:34:51.439
Francesca.
2505
01:34:52.060 --> 01:34:52.479
Dash.
2506
01:34:53.020 --> 01:34:53.319
Buck.
2507
01:34:53.899 --> 01:34:55.640
Morpheus. What's his name? Ron.
2508
01:34:55.960 --> 01:34:57.220
Oh, right.
2509
01:34:58.819 --> 01:35:01.659
I forgot to turn on the oven, Scott.
2510
01:35:02.000 --> 01:35:02.539
What?
2511
01:35:03.600 --> 01:35:07.159
Oh, no. You did what? That's right. I don't have
2512
01:35:07.229 --> 01:35:09.689
a turkey. We're all starving here and you forgot to
2513
01:35:09.729 --> 01:35:12.210
turn on the fucking oven? Scott picking up a little
2514
01:35:12.289 --> 01:35:17.550
rhyme there. Scott, I'm... There's the door! Scott, I'm sorry.
2515
01:35:18.329 --> 01:35:21.520
I'm sorry I didn't make the turkey, but it still
2516
01:35:21.529 --> 01:35:23.619
was fun, right? I mean, we had guests. Rudy. We
2517
01:35:23.680 --> 01:35:27.680
celebrated stuff. We were thankful. This is the worst Skanksgiving
2518
01:35:27.720 --> 01:35:31.159
I've ever had in my life! I hated it! I'm
2519
01:35:31.359 --> 01:35:31.960
out of here!
2520
01:35:34.520 --> 01:35:34.960
Scott!
2521
01:35:36.300 --> 01:35:39.630
Well. Wow. It looks like the only way for me
2522
01:35:40.210 --> 01:35:44.970
to save the CBB worldiverse... is to merge my cannon
2523
01:35:45.010 --> 01:35:46.199
with the speed force.
2524
01:35:46.800 --> 01:35:47.560
Jesus Christ.
2525
01:35:49.479 --> 01:35:52.579
I guess that makes sense. What is the matter with you?
2526
01:35:52.899 --> 01:35:55.159
How is that related to what just happened?
2527
01:35:55.220 --> 01:35:57.399
It's subconvoluted. No, no, no. It makes perfect sense.
2528
01:35:57.460 --> 01:35:58.380
I don't understand.
2529
01:35:58.420 --> 01:35:58.659
No, no.
2530
01:35:58.859 --> 01:36:01.880
You don't understand. The only way for me to save
2531
01:36:01.939 --> 01:36:07.119
the Speed Force and Thanksgiving and the CBB worldiverse is
2532
01:36:07.199 --> 01:36:10.479
if I merge with the Speed Force. It makes perfect sense.
2533
01:36:10.520 --> 01:36:12.050
You can make it in those things.
2534
01:36:12.069 --> 01:36:13.890
Just walk on. See what happens.
2535
01:36:13.909 --> 01:36:15.350
That grouse doesn't understand.
2536
01:36:15.369 --> 01:36:17.970
It's a little long. I'm just going to do it.
2537
01:36:18.350 --> 01:36:18.670
Okay.
2538
01:36:18.989 --> 01:36:19.409
Okay.
2539
01:36:19.430 --> 01:36:20.310
Okay.
2540
01:36:20.550 --> 01:36:25.789
And here I go. Goodbye, CBB World. Rudy North must
2541
01:36:25.869 --> 01:36:30.689
die so CBB World can live.
2542
01:36:30.720 --> 01:36:32.699
It's like the end of people's dreams of the search
2543
01:36:32.779 --> 01:36:33.300
of Spock.
2544
01:36:33.319 --> 01:36:38.020
He was saying he's going to die. No, no. I think, right?
2545
01:36:38.300 --> 01:36:38.800
My turn.
2546
01:36:47.819 --> 01:36:50.979
Thank you for listening to the Speed Force Thanksgiving special.
2547
01:36:51.420 --> 01:36:54.819
This has been a Whisper Studios production in association with
2548
01:36:54.880 --> 01:37:00.659
Brett Morris and CBBWorld.com. Special thanks to Lily Sullivan, Zach Rayno,
2549
01:37:00.979 --> 01:37:05.529
Matt Apodaca, Will Hines, Devin Field, and of course, Scott Ockerman.
2550
01:37:06.210 --> 01:37:25.699
That's canon, baby. Oh, God.
2551
01:37:27.140 --> 01:37:27.579
Wow.
2552
01:37:28.199 --> 01:37:31.390
So this is the Speed Force Afterlife, which is different
2553
01:37:31.409 --> 01:37:33.130
than hell, which I did kind of go to at
2554
01:37:33.210 --> 01:37:35.149
one point, became the devil, but this is totally different.
2555
01:37:35.170 --> 01:37:38.670
It's the Speed Force Afterlife. Well, looks like I have
2556
01:37:38.829 --> 01:37:42.529
all of eternity to reflect on my dirtbag misdeeds.
2557
01:37:44.449 --> 01:37:44.989
Rudy!
2558
01:37:46.520 --> 01:37:48.380
Cake Boss!
2559
01:37:48.439 --> 01:37:49.819
My sponsor and mentor!
2560
01:37:50.460 --> 01:37:51.039
What happened?
2561
01:37:51.560 --> 01:37:51.960
Rudy.
2562
01:37:52.890 --> 01:37:56.659
What have you done? I mean, I just saved the
2563
01:37:56.699 --> 01:37:59.869
CBB worldiverse by merging my cannon with the Speed Force.
2564
01:37:59.949 --> 01:38:02.109
It's a long story, but I can't get into that
2565
01:38:02.149 --> 01:38:03.270
right now. Rudy.
2566
01:38:04.229 --> 01:38:07.649
By pulling guests from old episodes to shave our reality,
2567
01:38:08.189 --> 01:38:13.720
you forever change the future, creating branch CBB timelines.
2568
01:38:13.960 --> 01:38:15.739
Branch CBB timelines?
2569
01:38:15.779 --> 01:38:17.000
That's what I just said.
2570
01:38:17.159 --> 01:38:17.720
Oh, no.
2571
01:38:17.739 --> 01:38:19.720
Yeah, yeah.
2572
01:38:19.880 --> 01:38:20.539
Oh, no, it's right.
2573
01:38:21.159 --> 01:38:22.720
I got bit by a cake lighting bug.
2574
01:38:23.189 --> 01:38:25.029
And I had a vision of the future.
2575
01:38:25.670 --> 01:38:29.170
Is it bad? No, it's good.
2576
01:38:29.210 --> 01:38:29.970
Yeah, that's right.
2577
01:38:30.020 --> 01:38:33.119
Why I came of course it's bad oh god we
2578
01:38:33.140 --> 01:38:37.810
need to prepare there's a crisis coming a crisis on
2579
01:38:37.869 --> 01:38:40.270
infinite bang bang.
2580
01:38:42.590 --> 01:38:44.609
Rudy North will.
2581
01:38:44.390 --> 01:38:53.899
Return This is an Aero.
2582
01:38:53.909 --> 01:38:57.239
Mmm.
2583
01:38:58.039 --> 01:39:04.020
And this is the sound of its minty bubbles. Conjuring
2584
01:39:04.100 --> 01:39:11.939
melt in your mouth. Pure bubbly joy. Melt into the
2585
01:39:11.979 --> 01:39:15.159
moment with Aero's delicious peppermint bubbles.
2586
01:39:15.189 --> 01:39:18.710
Aero, feel the bubbles melt.
2587
01:39:22.579 --> 01:39:24.380
Did you always want to become a teacher?
2588
01:39:24.600 --> 01:39:25.760
For as long as I can remember.
2589
01:39:25.859 --> 01:39:27.760
Bad Apples, starring Saoirse Ronan.
2590
01:39:27.819 --> 01:39:29.319
Danny! Shut up!
2591
01:39:29.439 --> 01:39:30.619
Four Stars, Empire.
2592
01:39:30.659 --> 01:39:32.069
You pushed a girl down the stairs.
2593
01:39:32.090 --> 01:39:33.989
I'm going to tell everyone you attacked me.
2594
01:39:34.189 --> 01:39:34.930
Let me go!
2595
01:39:35.069 --> 01:39:35.630
I hate you!
2596
01:39:35.649 --> 01:39:37.409
A relentless dark comedy, IndieWire.
2597
01:39:37.430 --> 01:39:40.010
Investigations continue into the disappearance of Danny Carter.
2598
01:39:40.069 --> 01:39:42.189
Deliciously twisted BBC talking movies.
2599
01:39:42.210 --> 01:39:43.329
You're never letting me go, are you?
2600
01:39:43.369 --> 01:39:46.140
Top of its class, The Hollywood Reporter. Is anyone feeling
2601
01:39:46.279 --> 01:39:48.039
sad or anxious now?
2602
01:39:48.890 --> 01:39:49.109
All right.
2603
01:39:49.590 --> 01:39:52.529
Bad apples in Simmons, September 18th.
2604
01:39:52.850 --> 01:39:58.060
My home is my castle. My sing-in-the-shower place or work-in-my-undies place.
2605
01:39:58.609 --> 01:40:02.640
My pizza for breakfast. Cornflakes for dinner place. My home
2606
01:40:02.760 --> 01:40:03.739
is my me place.
2607
01:40:04.319 --> 01:40:07.020
With AXA Home Insurance, you can protect the place where
2608
01:40:07.039 --> 01:40:10.880
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2609
01:40:10.920 --> 01:40:13.979
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2610
01:40:14.020 --> 01:40:14.819
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2611
01:40:15.359 --> 01:40:17.779
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2612
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2613
01:40:21.130 --> 01:40:22.289
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